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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,300 --> 00:00:05,070 [Partridge family theme playing] 2 00:00:10,666 --> 00:00:14,426 ♪ Come on now and meet everybody ♪ 3 00:00:14,433 --> 00:00:18,673 ♪ and hear us singing ♪ 4 00:00:18,666 --> 00:00:22,996 ♪ there's nothing better than being together ♪ 5 00:00:23,000 --> 00:00:27,100 ♪ when we're singing ♪ 6 00:00:27,100 --> 00:00:28,530 ♪ the five of us ♪ 7 00:00:28,533 --> 00:00:30,333 ♪ and mom working all day ♪ 8 00:00:30,333 --> 00:00:33,803 ♪ we knew we could help her if our music would pay ♪ 9 00:00:33,800 --> 00:00:36,570 ♪ Danny got Reuben to sell our song ♪ 10 00:00:36,566 --> 00:00:40,126 ♪ and it really came together when mom sang along ♪ 11 00:00:40,133 --> 00:00:44,303 ♪ come on now and meet everybody ♪ 12 00:00:44,300 --> 00:00:48,500 ♪ and hear us singing ♪ 13 00:00:48,500 --> 00:00:52,700 ♪ there's nothing better than being together ♪ 14 00:00:52,700 --> 00:00:56,030 ♪ when we're singing ♪ 15 00:00:56,033 --> 00:00:59,303 ♪ when we're singing ♪ 16 00:00:59,300 --> 00:01:02,770 ♪ when we're singing ♪♪ 17 00:01:06,900 --> 00:01:07,900 Shirley: I see a mustang. 18 00:01:07,901 --> 00:01:09,101 Keith: Good, I can use that. 19 00:01:09,100 --> 00:01:10,230 Danny: So could I. 20 00:01:10,233 --> 00:01:11,873 Shirley: I imagine you've often wondered 21 00:01:11,866 --> 00:01:14,096 what five kids do on a long bus ride. 22 00:01:14,100 --> 00:01:15,330 Well, they usually do something 23 00:01:15,333 --> 00:01:16,773 that's bad for their complexions 24 00:01:16,766 --> 00:01:17,766 or bad for my nerves. 25 00:01:17,767 --> 00:01:19,227 But this trip, 26 00:01:19,233 --> 00:01:21,103 someone came up with a new game, 27 00:01:21,100 --> 00:01:22,630 "highway bingo". 28 00:01:22,633 --> 00:01:25,233 I call out the cars I see, and they fill in the squares. 29 00:01:25,233 --> 00:01:28,303 It's a lot like regular bingo, except it's nonsectarian. 30 00:01:29,733 --> 00:01:31,203 There's a dodge. 31 00:01:31,200 --> 00:01:33,300 Tracy: I only got four more to go on this side. 32 00:01:33,300 --> 00:01:35,030 Oh, I can't win. 33 00:01:35,033 --> 00:01:36,103 Well, why not? 34 00:01:36,100 --> 00:01:37,830 You only have one more space to fill. 35 00:01:37,833 --> 00:01:40,133 Yeah, but when was the last time you saw a Hudson? 36 00:01:41,066 --> 00:01:42,466 Vw. 37 00:01:42,466 --> 00:01:44,626 Mom, you said that one already. 38 00:01:44,633 --> 00:01:47,273 I just call 'em like I see 'em. 39 00:02:08,500 --> 00:02:10,270 Did you see that? 40 00:02:10,266 --> 00:02:12,426 You're a witness, right? Crashed right into me! 41 00:02:12,433 --> 00:02:14,703 What'd you hit, mom? 42 00:02:14,700 --> 00:02:16,870 I think it was a studebaker. 43 00:02:16,866 --> 00:02:18,026 Bingo! 44 00:02:19,233 --> 00:02:20,833 Yup, she's got it all right. 45 00:02:21,700 --> 00:02:23,500 You crazy hippies, 46 00:02:23,500 --> 00:02:25,630 it's not enough you Don't trust anyone over 30, 47 00:02:25,633 --> 00:02:27,003 now you're trying to wipe us out. 48 00:02:31,533 --> 00:02:32,733 You force me to say something 49 00:02:32,733 --> 00:02:33,733 I Don't wanna say. 50 00:02:33,734 --> 00:02:34,904 I'm over 30 myself. 51 00:02:34,900 --> 00:02:36,300 I Don't care how old you are. 52 00:02:36,300 --> 00:02:38,130 You drive like you were born yesterday. 53 00:02:38,133 --> 00:02:39,503 Can't we discuss this rationally? 54 00:02:39,500 --> 00:02:40,800 Who says you're rational? 55 00:02:40,800 --> 00:02:42,130 You can't even decide what color 56 00:02:42,133 --> 00:02:43,403 to paint the bus. 57 00:02:43,400 --> 00:02:44,630 We did that on purpose. 58 00:02:44,633 --> 00:02:46,273 Of course you did, to confuse the witnesses 59 00:02:46,633 --> 00:02:48,153 when you have an accident. Keith: Mom... 60 00:02:48,633 --> 00:02:50,403 There's no damage. 61 00:02:50,400 --> 00:02:52,370 No damage? 62 00:02:52,366 --> 00:02:53,766 What do you call that? 63 00:02:53,766 --> 00:02:56,166 That's an old scratch. It's already rusted. 64 00:02:56,166 --> 00:02:57,766 Well, the salt air around here 65 00:02:57,766 --> 00:02:59,566 makes things rust pretty fast. 66 00:02:59,566 --> 00:03:00,566 Not that fast. 67 00:03:00,567 --> 00:03:01,867 Will $5.00 cover it? 68 00:03:01,866 --> 00:03:04,126 An attempt on my life is worth more than $5.00. 69 00:03:04,133 --> 00:03:05,133 Take it or leave it. 70 00:03:05,134 --> 00:03:06,674 But since it was an accident... 71 00:03:06,666 --> 00:03:09,326 I'll get my purse. 72 00:03:09,333 --> 00:03:12,703 It's amazing how logical greed can make you. 73 00:03:12,700 --> 00:03:15,630 Why do you wanna ride around in something like this? 74 00:03:15,633 --> 00:03:18,833 What are parents coming to these days? 75 00:03:18,833 --> 00:03:20,773 We happen to be the partridge family: 76 00:03:20,766 --> 00:03:23,926 Stars of stage, television, and nightclubs. 77 00:03:23,933 --> 00:03:25,533 You may have heard some of our recordings. 78 00:03:25,533 --> 00:03:26,703 You're in show business? 79 00:03:26,700 --> 00:03:27,800 That's right. Here's your money. 80 00:03:27,800 --> 00:03:29,030 Big stars? 81 00:03:29,033 --> 00:03:31,203 Pretty big. Ooh! My back! 82 00:03:32,300 --> 00:03:34,370 Oh! Ooh! Whiplash! 83 00:03:34,366 --> 00:03:35,696 Whiplash! You saw the wreck. 84 00:03:35,700 --> 00:03:37,130 You're witnesses, right? 85 00:03:37,133 --> 00:03:38,303 Whiplash. 86 00:03:38,300 --> 00:03:40,430 Whiplash! Whiplash! 87 00:03:40,433 --> 00:03:42,133 Did you see that crash? 88 00:03:42,133 --> 00:03:44,173 Whiplash. Whiplash! 89 00:03:46,433 --> 00:03:49,773 [♪♪♪] 90 00:03:57,633 --> 00:03:59,903 Half a million dollars? 91 00:03:59,900 --> 00:04:01,870 Did you say half a million dollars? 92 00:04:01,866 --> 00:04:03,066 That's right. 93 00:04:03,066 --> 00:04:04,166 They can't sue us. 94 00:04:04,166 --> 00:04:06,626 We Don't have that kind of money. 95 00:04:06,633 --> 00:04:08,003 How much insurance do we have, 96 00:04:08,000 --> 00:04:09,360 Mr. Lowenfeld? Well, up to $50,000, 97 00:04:10,000 --> 00:04:11,370 but you needn't worry. 98 00:04:11,366 --> 00:04:13,366 He's willing to settle out of court for $10,000. 99 00:04:13,366 --> 00:04:15,266 Oh, that's very generous of him. 100 00:04:15,266 --> 00:04:17,496 We haven't any choice but to settle. 101 00:04:17,500 --> 00:04:18,500 Why? 102 00:04:18,501 --> 00:04:19,901 He was fine until he found out 103 00:04:19,900 --> 00:04:20,970 we were in show business. 104 00:04:20,966 --> 00:04:21,996 There's nothing wrong with him. 105 00:04:22,000 --> 00:04:23,200 Let him take us to court. 106 00:04:23,200 --> 00:04:25,070 Well, Mr. Larkin claims he can't bend over. 107 00:04:26,500 --> 00:04:27,830 Now, there are some back injuries 108 00:04:27,833 --> 00:04:29,173 that can't be detected medically. 109 00:04:29,166 --> 00:04:30,466 You can't detect something 110 00:04:30,466 --> 00:04:31,866 when it isn't there. Unfortunately, 111 00:04:32,466 --> 00:04:33,626 in this kind of suit, 112 00:04:33,633 --> 00:04:35,233 it's up to you to prove he's faking, 113 00:04:35,233 --> 00:04:36,503 and you can't do that. 114 00:04:37,733 --> 00:04:40,533 Okay. I guess you're right. 115 00:04:40,533 --> 00:04:42,233 I'll call the home office tomorrow 116 00:04:42,233 --> 00:04:43,473 and recommend we settle. 117 00:04:43,466 --> 00:04:44,766 In a few days, 118 00:04:44,766 --> 00:04:46,396 I'll have some papers for you to sign. 119 00:04:46,400 --> 00:04:48,280 Thank you, Mr. Lowenfeld. Good night. Good night. 120 00:04:48,400 --> 00:04:49,570 You leaving too, Reuben? 121 00:04:49,566 --> 00:04:50,766 Well, I've given you advice 122 00:04:50,766 --> 00:04:52,126 that's ruined your whole day. 123 00:04:52,133 --> 00:04:54,403 I figure my job's done. 124 00:04:54,400 --> 00:04:55,800 Good night. Good night. 125 00:04:58,033 --> 00:05:00,173 Mom... 126 00:05:00,166 --> 00:05:01,566 Do you wanna hear what I think? 127 00:05:01,566 --> 00:05:03,766 Is there any possible way I cannot hear what you think? 128 00:05:03,766 --> 00:05:05,996 No. 129 00:05:06,000 --> 00:05:08,300 Then I'd love to hear what you think. 130 00:05:08,300 --> 00:05:09,930 I think you copped out. 131 00:05:09,933 --> 00:05:10,933 If what's his name... 132 00:05:10,934 --> 00:05:13,334 Willie. Willie Larkin. 133 00:05:13,333 --> 00:05:16,003 If Willie Larkin isn't hurt, and we know he isn't, 134 00:05:16,000 --> 00:05:17,270 then he doesn't deserve any money. 135 00:05:17,266 --> 00:05:18,496 I agree. 136 00:05:18,500 --> 00:05:20,100 Then you're helping him to commit a fraud, 137 00:05:20,100 --> 00:05:21,970 and you're just as guilty as he is. 138 00:05:21,966 --> 00:05:24,096 But we can't prove anything. 139 00:05:24,100 --> 00:05:25,830 But you're not even trying. 140 00:05:25,833 --> 00:05:28,603 You're taking the easy way out. 141 00:05:28,600 --> 00:05:30,430 That's why this world is in such a mess. 142 00:05:30,433 --> 00:05:32,573 Honey, I didn't destroy this world 143 00:05:32,566 --> 00:05:33,826 all by myself, you know. 144 00:05:33,833 --> 00:05:35,173 I had a little help. 145 00:05:35,166 --> 00:05:37,926 I didn't mean you. I meant your generation. 146 00:05:37,933 --> 00:05:38,933 What's going on? 147 00:05:38,934 --> 00:05:41,104 Laurie's protesting again. 148 00:05:41,100 --> 00:05:42,330 So what's new? 149 00:05:42,333 --> 00:05:43,703 This time, she has a point. 150 00:05:43,700 --> 00:05:45,830 Hey, that is new. 151 00:05:45,833 --> 00:05:48,173 The man is getting $10,000, 152 00:05:48,166 --> 00:05:49,766 and there's nothing wrong with him. 153 00:05:49,766 --> 00:05:50,766 Is that true? 154 00:05:51,633 --> 00:05:52,903 Why is that? 155 00:05:52,900 --> 00:05:55,300 The insurance company wants to settle out of court. 156 00:05:55,300 --> 00:05:56,830 But it doesn't matter what 157 00:05:56,833 --> 00:05:59,033 the insurance company wants to do. 158 00:05:59,033 --> 00:06:00,673 The question is what do you wanna do? 159 00:06:01,800 --> 00:06:03,800 Well, i... 160 00:06:03,800 --> 00:06:04,930 I'd like to fight it. 161 00:06:08,266 --> 00:06:10,396 On the other hand, I... 162 00:06:10,400 --> 00:06:12,030 I'd like to settle out of court. 163 00:06:12,033 --> 00:06:14,033 Mom, you're no king Solomon. 164 00:06:18,633 --> 00:06:19,803 Shirley: There are times 165 00:06:19,800 --> 00:06:21,730 when a woman just has to get away. 166 00:06:21,733 --> 00:06:24,403 And go sit in her bus. 167 00:06:24,400 --> 00:06:26,030 Reuben and the insurance man are right. 168 00:06:26,033 --> 00:06:27,973 Why go to court when there's practically no chance 169 00:06:27,966 --> 00:06:29,266 of winning? 170 00:06:29,266 --> 00:06:32,596 But then, Laurie and the kids are also right. 171 00:06:32,600 --> 00:06:34,330 If they're both right, who's wrong? 172 00:06:34,333 --> 00:06:36,103 [Knocking] 173 00:06:36,100 --> 00:06:38,670 [Television playing] 174 00:06:38,666 --> 00:06:40,296 [Shuts television off] 175 00:06:46,333 --> 00:06:47,333 Oh! 176 00:06:47,334 --> 00:06:48,804 Well, the lady bus driver. 177 00:06:48,800 --> 00:06:50,800 I just came by to see how you were feeling. 178 00:06:50,800 --> 00:06:52,400 I expected you to check up on me, 179 00:06:52,400 --> 00:06:54,000 but I thought you'd come during visiting hours. 180 00:06:54,000 --> 00:06:55,100 Are you in pain? 181 00:06:55,100 --> 00:06:56,970 It comes and goes. It's ebbing now. 182 00:06:56,966 --> 00:06:58,966 It only feels like a hot branding iron. 183 00:06:58,966 --> 00:07:00,696 I'm so glad you're feeling better. 184 00:07:00,700 --> 00:07:01,830 Thank you. 185 00:07:01,833 --> 00:07:03,903 I'm certain you'd feel a lot better 186 00:07:03,900 --> 00:07:05,700 if you got a check from the insurance company. 187 00:07:05,700 --> 00:07:06,800 It wouldn't hurt any less. 188 00:07:06,800 --> 00:07:08,700 But I wouldn't mind as much. 189 00:07:08,700 --> 00:07:10,400 Well, come on in. 190 00:07:13,033 --> 00:07:15,173 Please sit down, even if I can't. 191 00:07:15,166 --> 00:07:16,266 You can't sit down? 192 00:07:16,266 --> 00:07:17,266 I can't get up. 193 00:07:17,267 --> 00:07:19,097 Not with the back brace and this. 194 00:07:19,100 --> 00:07:20,400 But make yourself comfortable. 195 00:07:20,400 --> 00:07:23,870 I'll just prop myself up against the wall. 196 00:07:25,266 --> 00:07:27,096 Mr. Larkin, 197 00:07:27,100 --> 00:07:29,430 I've come over to ask you to withdraw your case. 198 00:07:29,433 --> 00:07:30,703 You gotta be kidding. 199 00:07:30,700 --> 00:07:33,030 How often is a man lucky enough to get this badly hurt? 200 00:07:35,933 --> 00:07:38,673 Look, you're causing a very serious conflict 201 00:07:38,666 --> 00:07:40,396 in my home. 202 00:07:40,400 --> 00:07:42,270 Lady, I got nothing against you and your kids. 203 00:07:42,266 --> 00:07:44,126 Then why are you suing us? 204 00:07:44,133 --> 00:07:45,833 So we can settle out of court! 205 00:07:45,833 --> 00:07:47,103 This is strictly a matter 206 00:07:47,100 --> 00:07:49,430 between me and a rich insurance company. 207 00:07:51,000 --> 00:07:53,870 Only if we settle out of court. 208 00:07:53,866 --> 00:07:56,526 I'm not so sure I could do that in all good conscience. 209 00:07:56,533 --> 00:07:58,003 Mrs. Partridge, 210 00:07:58,000 --> 00:08:00,470 I'm not taking anything from you or your family. 211 00:08:00,466 --> 00:08:02,626 I'm not even hurting the insurance company. 212 00:08:02,633 --> 00:08:04,733 They're just paying what it would cost 213 00:08:04,733 --> 00:08:06,533 to take the case to court. 214 00:08:06,533 --> 00:08:07,933 Do me a favor. 215 00:08:07,933 --> 00:08:10,403 I never had a parade before. Don't rain on it. 216 00:08:21,066 --> 00:08:22,496 Mm, mom, what did you decide 217 00:08:22,500 --> 00:08:24,570 about whiplash Willie? 218 00:08:24,566 --> 00:08:25,866 Are you gonna give him anything? 219 00:08:25,866 --> 00:08:28,096 I'd like to give him an academy award for pain. 220 00:08:28,100 --> 00:08:29,900 He's almost convincing. 221 00:08:29,900 --> 00:08:31,500 Well, we all talked about it last night. 222 00:08:31,500 --> 00:08:33,500 Mm-hmm. What was your decision? 223 00:08:33,500 --> 00:08:34,900 We decided it's your problem. 224 00:08:34,900 --> 00:08:35,930 Thanks a lot. 225 00:08:35,933 --> 00:08:37,433 It's not like that, I mean... 226 00:08:37,433 --> 00:08:40,403 Mom! I fell on the patio and skinned my knee! 227 00:08:40,400 --> 00:08:42,430 Oh, honey, let me see. 228 00:08:43,500 --> 00:08:44,770 Well, I Don't see anything. 229 00:08:44,766 --> 00:08:47,126 It's there. You just can't see it. 230 00:08:47,133 --> 00:08:49,133 It's the first time I ever saw a skinned knee 231 00:08:49,133 --> 00:08:50,303 with skin on it. 232 00:08:50,300 --> 00:08:53,170 It doesn't matter. It was your patio. 233 00:08:53,166 --> 00:08:54,396 I'll make a deal. 234 00:08:54,400 --> 00:08:55,600 You give me 25 cents 235 00:08:55,600 --> 00:08:57,200 and I'll settle out of court. Chris! 236 00:08:57,200 --> 00:08:58,600 How about 15... 237 00:08:58,600 --> 00:09:00,430 How about a spanking? 238 00:09:00,433 --> 00:09:02,803 Let's forget the whole thing! 239 00:09:02,800 --> 00:09:04,130 Boy, wounded in action, 240 00:09:04,133 --> 00:09:06,803 and I still can't get a break. 241 00:09:06,800 --> 00:09:08,130 [Door slams] 242 00:09:08,133 --> 00:09:09,173 Well, like I said, 243 00:09:09,166 --> 00:09:10,166 it's your decision, 244 00:09:10,167 --> 00:09:11,567 no matter how much it affects us. 245 00:09:13,133 --> 00:09:14,803 [Doorbell ringing] 246 00:09:18,300 --> 00:09:20,670 Finish eating. I'll get it. 247 00:09:26,466 --> 00:09:27,926 Hello, Reuben. Hi, Shirley. 248 00:09:27,933 --> 00:09:28,933 Where are the kids? 249 00:09:28,934 --> 00:09:30,004 I think they're out back. 250 00:09:30,000 --> 00:09:31,070 Good. 251 00:09:31,066 --> 00:09:32,626 The insurance investigator gave me the papers 252 00:09:32,633 --> 00:09:33,633 for you to sign. 253 00:09:33,634 --> 00:09:34,774 What papers? 254 00:09:34,766 --> 00:09:37,126 It's the agreement to settle out of court. 255 00:09:37,133 --> 00:09:38,533 [Sighs] 256 00:09:40,866 --> 00:09:42,496 Reuben... 257 00:09:44,933 --> 00:09:46,503 I can't sign those papers. 258 00:09:46,500 --> 00:09:48,430 Well, you have to sign. Why can't you sign? 259 00:09:49,633 --> 00:09:50,803 Just a minute ago, 260 00:09:50,800 --> 00:09:52,800 Chris bumped his knee on the patio and he said 261 00:09:52,800 --> 00:09:54,800 if I didn't give him a quarter, he would sue. 262 00:09:54,800 --> 00:09:56,970 What is that? He's only playing. 263 00:09:56,966 --> 00:09:59,296 Yes, but children's games come from 264 00:09:59,300 --> 00:10:01,170 imitating things they've learned. 265 00:10:03,233 --> 00:10:05,573 Well, he couldn't have learned much 266 00:10:05,566 --> 00:10:07,826 if he only asked for a quarter. 267 00:10:10,400 --> 00:10:12,230 Reuben, I'm serious. 268 00:10:12,233 --> 00:10:14,303 I Don't want my kids growing up with the idea 269 00:10:14,300 --> 00:10:16,570 that lying is a quick way to make a buck. 270 00:10:16,566 --> 00:10:18,426 Shirley, there is a nut out there 271 00:10:18,433 --> 00:10:20,733 suing you for half a million dollars. 272 00:10:20,733 --> 00:10:21,733 What about Chris? 273 00:10:21,734 --> 00:10:23,234 He hasn't got a case. 274 00:10:23,233 --> 00:10:24,573 What are you guys talking about? 275 00:10:26,033 --> 00:10:27,373 Morals and values. 276 00:10:27,366 --> 00:10:29,396 What does that mean in dollars and cents? 277 00:10:31,100 --> 00:10:32,470 The price of morals and values 278 00:10:32,466 --> 00:10:34,726 has just gone up. 279 00:10:34,733 --> 00:10:36,333 Danny, go get the rest of the kids. 280 00:10:36,333 --> 00:10:37,833 We're going to have a meeting. 281 00:10:37,833 --> 00:10:39,033 What about? 282 00:10:39,033 --> 00:10:40,633 I've decided to join you kids. 283 00:10:40,633 --> 00:10:41,833 We're going to fight whiplash Willie. 284 00:10:41,833 --> 00:10:46,603 Yay! We're gonna fight! We're gonna win! 285 00:10:46,600 --> 00:10:47,900 Strange. 286 00:10:47,900 --> 00:10:51,700 That's exactly what general custer said. 287 00:10:54,833 --> 00:10:56,833 I knew you wouldn't let him get away with it. 288 00:10:56,833 --> 00:10:57,833 Laurie: Yeah, mom, 289 00:10:57,834 --> 00:10:59,004 you're doing the right thing. 290 00:10:59,000 --> 00:11:01,000 Well, being right doesn't come cheap. 291 00:11:01,000 --> 00:11:02,870 We're jumping from a $10,000 settlement 292 00:11:02,866 --> 00:11:03,996 against the insurance company 293 00:11:04,000 --> 00:11:06,170 to a half-million dollar lawsuit against us. 294 00:11:06,166 --> 00:11:08,526 He may ask for half a million, 295 00:11:08,533 --> 00:11:11,103 but he can't get more than $250,000. 296 00:11:11,100 --> 00:11:13,100 Yes, but the insurance company 297 00:11:13,100 --> 00:11:15,930 will only pay $50,000. 298 00:11:15,933 --> 00:11:19,603 That means all of us would have to pay the rest. 299 00:11:19,600 --> 00:11:22,230 Two-hundred thousand dollars! 300 00:11:24,533 --> 00:11:28,973 It's a very simple procedure, Mr. Kincaid. 301 00:11:28,966 --> 00:11:31,866 Whiplash Willie claims he can't bend over. 302 00:11:31,866 --> 00:11:32,866 All we have to do 303 00:11:32,867 --> 00:11:34,627 is get a picture of him bending over 304 00:11:34,633 --> 00:11:37,703 and he has absolutely no case against us. 305 00:11:37,700 --> 00:11:39,330 So far so good. 306 00:11:39,333 --> 00:11:40,733 Do you think it'll work? 307 00:11:40,733 --> 00:11:42,433 Of course. It's an old formula. 308 00:11:42,433 --> 00:11:45,373 Greed plus opportunity equals exposure. 309 00:11:45,366 --> 00:11:47,566 Remember that? 310 00:11:47,566 --> 00:11:50,426 I've forgotten more formulas than you'll ever know. 311 00:11:50,433 --> 00:11:53,333 Now, you know what you're supposed to do? 312 00:11:53,333 --> 00:11:54,603 Right. Right! 313 00:11:54,600 --> 00:11:57,100 You Don't wanna synchronize watches, do you? 314 00:11:58,600 --> 00:12:00,100 [Vacuum cleaner whirring] 315 00:12:02,566 --> 00:12:03,796 [Vacuum cleaner turns off] 316 00:12:16,533 --> 00:12:19,033 Yeah? Oh, good morning, sir. 317 00:12:19,033 --> 00:12:20,473 I'm your door-to-door quiz program, 318 00:12:20,466 --> 00:12:22,866 the show for those people who Don't listen to TV or radio. 319 00:12:22,866 --> 00:12:24,296 Is this some kind of a put-on? 320 00:12:24,300 --> 00:12:25,470 No, siree. 321 00:12:25,466 --> 00:12:27,266 Now, in my hand, I have a $20 bill, 322 00:12:27,266 --> 00:12:28,666 and if you can answer this question 323 00:12:28,666 --> 00:12:29,926 in 10 seconds or less, 324 00:12:29,933 --> 00:12:31,573 the $20 bill is yours. 325 00:12:31,566 --> 00:12:32,766 Ready? 326 00:12:32,766 --> 00:12:34,226 It's crazy, but go ahead. 327 00:12:34,233 --> 00:12:36,103 Name a president of the United States... 328 00:12:36,100 --> 00:12:37,100 Richard milhous Nixon. 329 00:12:38,100 --> 00:12:39,730 Close enough. 330 00:12:39,733 --> 00:12:42,933 And here, sir, is your $20 bill. 331 00:12:42,933 --> 00:12:43,933 Oh, I'm sorry. 332 00:12:43,934 --> 00:12:45,234 That's all right. Goodbye. 333 00:12:46,633 --> 00:12:48,103 Hold it! 334 00:12:50,600 --> 00:12:51,600 And thanks. 335 00:12:51,601 --> 00:12:53,071 Reuben: And another thing. 336 00:12:53,066 --> 00:12:54,226 When you're sneaking a picture, 337 00:12:54,233 --> 00:12:55,933 you Don't jump out and say "hold!" 338 00:12:57,066 --> 00:12:58,866 Actually, Mr. Kincaid, 339 00:12:58,866 --> 00:13:01,096 it's a very good picture of the door, 340 00:13:01,100 --> 00:13:03,100 and you came out pretty good too. 341 00:13:04,500 --> 00:13:06,170 That is the expression of a man 342 00:13:06,166 --> 00:13:09,396 who just threw away 20 bucks. 343 00:13:09,400 --> 00:13:11,830 I bet the CIA even has bad days. 344 00:13:11,833 --> 00:13:14,603 Yeah, but they also have expense accounts. 345 00:13:14,600 --> 00:13:16,930 Hey, look, Willie's leaving the house. 346 00:13:18,466 --> 00:13:19,566 I wonder where he's going. 347 00:13:19,566 --> 00:13:21,366 He's going out to spend my money, 348 00:13:21,366 --> 00:13:22,366 that's where he's going. 349 00:13:22,367 --> 00:13:23,967 Get down. 350 00:13:25,166 --> 00:13:27,696 Hey, I've got another idea. 351 00:13:27,700 --> 00:13:28,870 A better one. 352 00:13:28,866 --> 00:13:31,396 By better, you mean more expensive. 353 00:13:31,400 --> 00:13:35,700 It's only money. 354 00:13:35,700 --> 00:13:37,600 Yeah, but it's my money. 355 00:13:46,466 --> 00:13:49,396 They Don't even do this in comic books anymore. 356 00:13:49,400 --> 00:13:52,600 Anybody would bend over to pick up $50, Mr. Kincaid. 357 00:13:52,600 --> 00:13:53,670 I thought the point was 358 00:13:53,666 --> 00:13:55,626 to keep him from getting any money. 359 00:14:24,400 --> 00:14:26,030 Well, look at the bright side of it, 360 00:14:26,033 --> 00:14:27,173 Mr. Kincaid. 361 00:14:27,166 --> 00:14:29,926 I didn't waste another picture. 362 00:14:34,866 --> 00:14:36,426 Wait, you'll give me $10 363 00:14:36,433 --> 00:14:38,403 for doing absolutely nothing? 364 00:14:38,400 --> 00:14:40,870 Well, you do have to do one thing. 365 00:14:40,866 --> 00:14:42,266 I think I'm gonna call a cop... 366 00:14:42,266 --> 00:14:43,266 No, wait. 367 00:14:43,267 --> 00:14:44,597 All I want you to do 368 00:14:44,600 --> 00:14:47,200 is drop this box of soap, and let a man pick it up. 369 00:14:47,200 --> 00:14:49,670 Oh, is this a commercial or something? 370 00:14:50,966 --> 00:14:52,166 Right, a commercial. 371 00:14:52,166 --> 00:14:54,396 Hey, that's great. 372 00:14:54,400 --> 00:14:56,570 But shouldn't you be using a movie camera? 373 00:14:56,566 --> 00:14:58,526 I mean, that camera just takes stills. 374 00:14:58,533 --> 00:15:01,173 Uh, it's gonna be a very short commercial. 375 00:15:03,266 --> 00:15:04,266 Oh! 376 00:15:05,133 --> 00:15:06,973 Right, now, uh... in a minute, 377 00:15:06,966 --> 00:15:08,966 a man with a big neck brace and a cane 378 00:15:08,966 --> 00:15:10,166 will be coming down this street... 379 00:15:10,166 --> 00:15:11,406 Well, how will I recognize him? 380 00:15:12,933 --> 00:15:16,033 Well... the brace will be around his neck, 381 00:15:16,033 --> 00:15:17,803 and the cane will be in his hand. 382 00:15:17,800 --> 00:15:19,730 Okay, um... 383 00:15:19,733 --> 00:15:22,603 Neck brace, neck. Hand, cane. Okay. 384 00:15:23,666 --> 00:15:24,826 Yeah. 385 00:15:24,833 --> 00:15:26,833 Now, when he comes up, you just casually... 386 00:15:26,833 --> 00:15:28,403 Drop this box out of your bag, 387 00:15:28,400 --> 00:15:30,200 and let the man pick it up for you. 388 00:15:30,200 --> 00:15:31,500 Ah, then step back 389 00:15:31,500 --> 00:15:33,400 so my photographer can get his picture. 390 00:15:33,400 --> 00:15:34,670 Photographer? 391 00:15:34,666 --> 00:15:35,696 Isn't he a little young? 392 00:15:36,800 --> 00:15:38,370 Well, that's the youth market. 393 00:15:38,366 --> 00:15:39,926 They won't even look at pictures 394 00:15:39,933 --> 00:15:41,773 taken by anyone over 30. 395 00:16:02,300 --> 00:16:04,830 Reuben: Are you sure you're only 10 years old? 396 00:16:04,833 --> 00:16:05,903 Danny: Positive. 397 00:16:05,900 --> 00:16:09,530 I guess my psyche must be 13 or 14. 398 00:16:09,533 --> 00:16:12,133 Well, I see my spies came in out of the cold. 399 00:16:12,133 --> 00:16:13,403 How'd you do? 400 00:16:13,400 --> 00:16:14,400 Terrible. 401 00:16:14,401 --> 00:16:16,301 Eighty dollars worth of terrible. 402 00:16:16,300 --> 00:16:18,100 Your son is a rotten spy, 403 00:16:18,100 --> 00:16:20,170 but he has great potential 404 00:16:20,166 --> 00:16:21,296 taking pictures for girly magazines. 405 00:16:21,300 --> 00:16:22,500 Honest, mom, 406 00:16:22,500 --> 00:16:25,300 it was like the camera had a will of its own. 407 00:16:25,300 --> 00:16:27,200 I think the camera's beginning to grow up. 408 00:16:29,666 --> 00:16:32,426 You know, the worst thing is, Willie's suspicious. 409 00:16:32,433 --> 00:16:34,473 He's not gonna fall for any more tricks. 410 00:16:34,466 --> 00:16:37,096 Sure. He couldn't have gotten wise 411 00:16:37,100 --> 00:16:40,470 50 or 60 bucks sooner. 412 00:16:40,466 --> 00:16:41,866 Anyway, we blew it. 413 00:16:41,866 --> 00:16:43,266 Now we're sunk. 414 00:16:43,266 --> 00:16:44,826 Well, maybe not. 415 00:16:44,833 --> 00:16:46,433 He expects us to try and trick him, 416 00:16:46,433 --> 00:16:49,673 but he wouldn't expect a frontal attack. 417 00:16:49,666 --> 00:16:51,296 We're gonna beat him up? 418 00:16:51,300 --> 00:16:52,600 Of course not. 419 00:16:52,600 --> 00:16:54,570 The poor man's been hurt. 420 00:16:54,566 --> 00:16:56,596 Why, he shouldn't even be on his feet. 421 00:16:56,600 --> 00:16:59,500 He... he needs someone to be with him constantly, 422 00:16:59,500 --> 00:17:03,200 someone to wait on him hand and foot. 423 00:17:04,300 --> 00:17:06,030 What a pleasant surprise. 424 00:17:06,033 --> 00:17:08,833 When did you get into town, Doris? 425 00:17:08,833 --> 00:17:10,873 Only for a week? 426 00:17:10,866 --> 00:17:13,296 Well, we can't waste any time then. 427 00:17:13,300 --> 00:17:15,270 Why Don't you come over now, 428 00:17:15,266 --> 00:17:17,296 and we'll spend a nice quiet evening 429 00:17:17,300 --> 00:17:18,500 alone together. 430 00:17:18,500 --> 00:17:19,870 [Knocking] 431 00:17:22,000 --> 00:17:23,800 Just a minute. 432 00:17:33,200 --> 00:17:34,800 Lady, I've been waiting for you with open... 433 00:17:34,800 --> 00:17:36,530 Agh! 434 00:17:36,533 --> 00:17:39,473 "Waiting for you with open ahs." 435 00:17:39,466 --> 00:17:42,496 Maybe he was expecting his dentist. 436 00:17:42,500 --> 00:17:44,370 Why, the poor man's in pain. 437 00:17:44,366 --> 00:17:45,966 Right. I have to ask you to leave. 438 00:17:45,966 --> 00:17:47,766 I Don't like people to see me like this. 439 00:17:47,766 --> 00:17:49,126 It's... it's not pretty. 440 00:17:49,133 --> 00:17:50,673 But that's why we're here. 441 00:17:50,666 --> 00:17:52,266 We all feel so guilty 442 00:17:52,266 --> 00:17:53,626 because we've done this to you. 443 00:17:53,633 --> 00:17:55,603 We're gonna stay here and take care of you 444 00:17:55,600 --> 00:17:57,870 until you can take care of yourself. 445 00:17:57,866 --> 00:17:58,946 Even if that takes forever. 446 00:18:03,133 --> 00:18:04,133 Hi. 447 00:18:06,033 --> 00:18:08,373 Okay, that's it. That does it. 448 00:18:08,366 --> 00:18:09,466 Hello. Hi. 449 00:18:09,466 --> 00:18:10,696 Hi. Sleeping bags? 450 00:18:11,933 --> 00:18:14,003 How can we stay forever without sleeping bags? 451 00:18:14,000 --> 00:18:15,430 Why Don't you just pitch a tent 452 00:18:15,433 --> 00:18:16,433 and have a revival? 453 00:18:16,434 --> 00:18:17,974 Only as a last resort. 454 00:18:17,966 --> 00:18:21,096 A man with a back injury shouldn't be on his feet. 455 00:18:21,100 --> 00:18:22,800 Me sit in that? 456 00:18:22,800 --> 00:18:24,400 Well, how else am I gonna wheel you 457 00:18:24,400 --> 00:18:25,400 into your bed? 458 00:18:25,401 --> 00:18:26,631 I'm not gonna sit in that. 459 00:18:26,633 --> 00:18:28,673 I knew we should've brought the stretcher. 460 00:18:28,666 --> 00:18:30,126 Now, we know what we're doing. 461 00:18:30,133 --> 00:18:32,133 I've had nurse's training in school. 462 00:18:32,133 --> 00:18:34,033 And I took first aid in cub scouts. 463 00:18:34,033 --> 00:18:35,233 Wanna see a square knot? 464 00:18:35,233 --> 00:18:36,773 Tracy: And I had the chicken pox once. 465 00:18:45,333 --> 00:18:46,933 Hi. 466 00:18:48,033 --> 00:18:50,433 What's going on here? Doris! 467 00:18:50,433 --> 00:18:52,173 When you said we were gonna be alone, 468 00:18:52,166 --> 00:18:54,926 I didn't realize you meant you, me... 469 00:18:54,933 --> 00:18:56,033 And your whole new family! 470 00:18:56,033 --> 00:18:57,833 Doris, let me explain.Listen... 471 00:18:57,833 --> 00:19:00,303 I came over here for a little fun... 472 00:19:00,300 --> 00:19:03,370 Not to visit some day care center. 473 00:19:04,366 --> 00:19:06,066 Oh, you won't notice us at all. 474 00:19:06,066 --> 00:19:07,996 Just pretend we're not here. 475 00:19:08,000 --> 00:19:09,600 I have a better idea. 476 00:19:09,600 --> 00:19:11,570 You just pretend I'm not here. 477 00:19:11,566 --> 00:19:12,896 Baby, wait. 478 00:19:12,900 --> 00:19:14,070 Listen, if you want me, 479 00:19:14,066 --> 00:19:15,726 I'll be down at the ywca swimming pool 480 00:19:15,733 --> 00:19:18,073 throwing pennies in the deep end. 481 00:19:19,966 --> 00:19:22,126 Now, that hurt. 482 00:19:22,133 --> 00:19:23,933 ["I'll leave myself a little time" plays] 483 00:19:30,100 --> 00:19:33,470 ♪ Not long ago you'd find me feeling so low ♪ 484 00:19:33,466 --> 00:19:37,996 ♪ I had some troubles that you just can't hide ♪ 485 00:19:38,000 --> 00:19:41,500 ♪ no time to start but livin' far from my heart ♪ 486 00:19:41,500 --> 00:19:46,930 ♪ I thought I'd take another look inside ♪ 487 00:19:46,933 --> 00:19:50,573 ♪ lovers and friends will come and go like the wind ♪ 488 00:19:50,566 --> 00:19:55,396 ♪ and there is nothin' any man can do ♪ 489 00:19:55,400 --> 00:19:58,900 ♪ for what it's worth I'll make a home on this earth ♪ 490 00:19:58,900 --> 00:20:03,700 ♪ and I will hope that love will see me through ♪ 491 00:20:03,700 --> 00:20:06,100 ♪ I'll leave myself a little time ♪ 492 00:20:06,100 --> 00:20:07,830 ♪ for some gladness ♪ 493 00:20:07,833 --> 00:20:12,003 ♪ and even if I Don't know why ♪ 494 00:20:12,000 --> 00:20:15,230 ♪ tomorrow's gonna bring the sunshine ♪ 495 00:20:15,233 --> 00:20:20,503 ♪ to a brand-new day anyway ♪ 496 00:20:20,500 --> 00:20:24,000 ♪ there's music in the air with laughter everywhere ♪ 497 00:20:24,000 --> 00:20:28,970 ♪ and love could be the reason why ♪ 498 00:20:28,966 --> 00:20:32,066 ♪ I'll leave myself a little time ♪ 499 00:20:32,066 --> 00:20:34,226 ♪ to go a different way ♪ 500 00:20:37,833 --> 00:20:41,373 ♪ I can't believe that now I'm singin' a song ♪ 501 00:20:41,366 --> 00:20:46,196 ♪ or that I'm laughin' with that great big sun ♪ 502 00:20:46,200 --> 00:20:49,770 ♪ no one I see has got a worry for me ♪ 503 00:20:49,766 --> 00:20:53,166 ♪ I'm keepin' old Mr. Time on the run ♪ 504 00:20:54,733 --> 00:20:57,103 ♪ I'll leave myself a little time ♪ 505 00:20:57,100 --> 00:20:58,730 ♪ for some gladness ♪ 506 00:20:58,733 --> 00:21:03,073 ♪ and even if I Don't know why ♪ 507 00:21:03,066 --> 00:21:06,096 ♪ tomorrow's gonna bring the sunshine ♪ 508 00:21:06,100 --> 00:21:11,430 ♪ to a brand-new day anyway ♪ 509 00:21:11,433 --> 00:21:15,503 ♪ there's music in the air with laughter everywhere ♪ 510 00:21:15,500 --> 00:21:20,070 ♪ and love could be the reason why ♪ 511 00:21:20,066 --> 00:21:22,826 ♪ I'll leave myself a little time ♪ 512 00:21:22,833 --> 00:21:26,603 ♪ to go a different way ♪ 513 00:21:28,666 --> 00:21:31,126 ♪ I'll leave myself a little time ♪ 514 00:21:31,133 --> 00:21:37,103 ♪ to go a different way ♪ 515 00:21:37,100 --> 00:21:39,530 ♪ I'll leave myself a little time ♪ 516 00:21:39,533 --> 00:21:42,573 ♪ to go a different way ♪ 517 00:21:44,600 --> 00:21:45,770 [Vacuum whirring] 518 00:21:57,466 --> 00:21:59,226 Careful, honey! 519 00:22:01,166 --> 00:22:02,466 It ain't gonna work. 520 00:22:02,466 --> 00:22:03,466 What? 521 00:22:03,467 --> 00:22:04,527 [Shuts vacuum cleaner off] 522 00:22:04,533 --> 00:22:05,703 What? 523 00:22:05,700 --> 00:22:07,100 You're trying to make me like you, 524 00:22:07,100 --> 00:22:08,460 but it ain't gonna work. It ain't? 525 00:22:09,100 --> 00:22:11,600 Tracy, Don't say "ain't". 526 00:22:11,600 --> 00:22:14,870 Well, I like you, but it still ain't gonna work. 527 00:22:17,666 --> 00:22:18,896 Tracy, watch out! 528 00:22:19,766 --> 00:22:21,126 Oh! 529 00:22:21,133 --> 00:22:22,773 [Sighs] 530 00:22:25,200 --> 00:22:26,630 Honey, are you all right? 531 00:22:26,633 --> 00:22:29,133 Yeah, Willie saved me. 532 00:22:29,133 --> 00:22:31,803 Thank you. Ah, it was nothing. 533 00:22:31,800 --> 00:22:34,000 It's amazing how suddenly your back got better. 534 00:22:34,000 --> 00:22:35,330 Not really. Ooh... 535 00:22:35,333 --> 00:22:37,533 Mr. Larkin... 536 00:22:37,533 --> 00:22:40,773 Yeah... well, how about that? I'm cured. 537 00:22:42,700 --> 00:22:44,500 In a way, I'm kind of sorry. 538 00:22:44,500 --> 00:22:45,770 Me too. 539 00:22:45,766 --> 00:22:46,766 Laurie: Well, what's money? 540 00:22:46,767 --> 00:22:48,167 You got your health back again. 541 00:22:49,333 --> 00:22:51,203 I guess I should be ashamed of myself. 542 00:22:51,200 --> 00:22:53,170 You're a nice family. 543 00:22:53,166 --> 00:22:54,326 And underneath that neck brace, 544 00:22:54,333 --> 00:22:55,673 you're kind of a nice man. 545 00:22:55,666 --> 00:22:57,266 You've been so good to me all week, 546 00:22:57,266 --> 00:22:58,666 I really hate to see you go. 547 00:22:58,666 --> 00:22:59,996 Oh, you really Don't mean that. 548 00:23:00,000 --> 00:23:02,370 Yes, I do. 549 00:23:02,366 --> 00:23:03,566 Good help ain't easy to find. 550 00:23:04,700 --> 00:23:07,000 Don't say "ain't". 551 00:23:07,000 --> 00:23:08,370 [Laughs] 552 00:23:08,366 --> 00:23:09,766 Okay. 553 00:23:16,566 --> 00:23:17,566 Bye, Mr. Larkin. 554 00:23:17,567 --> 00:23:18,797 So long, Danny. 555 00:23:18,800 --> 00:23:21,000 Well, I think this is the last load. 556 00:23:21,000 --> 00:23:22,530 I guess we'd better go. 557 00:23:22,533 --> 00:23:24,173 Thanks for fixing my wagon. 558 00:23:24,166 --> 00:23:25,866 Oh, you're welcome, dear. 559 00:23:25,866 --> 00:23:26,866 So long, Keith. 560 00:23:26,867 --> 00:23:28,267 See you, Willie. 561 00:23:28,266 --> 00:23:29,696 I'm sure gonna miss you all. 562 00:23:29,700 --> 00:23:31,100 Hey, can I come over some night 563 00:23:31,100 --> 00:23:32,230 and baby-sit? 564 00:23:32,233 --> 00:23:33,733 That's like going to a shooting gallery 565 00:23:33,733 --> 00:23:35,503 and volunteering to be a duck. 566 00:23:35,500 --> 00:23:37,000 I'll take my chances. Bye, Mr. Larkin. 567 00:23:37,000 --> 00:23:38,600 So long. Goodbye, Laurie. Take care. 568 00:23:38,600 --> 00:23:39,800 You're welcome to come any time. 569 00:23:39,800 --> 00:23:42,170 Reuben: Well, now you can get back 570 00:23:42,166 --> 00:23:44,766 to being a serious bachelor. 571 00:23:44,766 --> 00:23:46,286 Why Don't you call your friend, Doris? 572 00:23:47,600 --> 00:23:49,300 I wish you hadn't mentioned her. 573 00:23:49,300 --> 00:23:50,630 Why? What's wrong? 574 00:23:50,633 --> 00:23:51,633 I just talked to her. 575 00:23:51,634 --> 00:23:52,834 She doesn't wanna see me again. 576 00:23:52,833 --> 00:23:54,833 She says I had my chance and I blew it. 577 00:23:54,833 --> 00:23:55,973 Oh, no. 578 00:23:55,966 --> 00:23:56,996 You mean because of us? 579 00:23:59,900 --> 00:24:01,300 Oh, I Don't know what to say. 580 00:24:01,300 --> 00:24:02,700 I... i'm so sorry. 581 00:24:02,700 --> 00:24:05,130 Me too. She was my fiancée, you know. 582 00:24:05,133 --> 00:24:06,533 We were gonna be married next week. 583 00:24:06,533 --> 00:24:07,533 Oh, I didn't know. 584 00:24:08,566 --> 00:24:10,126 Oh, I feel terrible about this. 585 00:24:10,133 --> 00:24:11,473 So do I. 586 00:24:11,466 --> 00:24:13,026 I really like you and the kids. 587 00:24:13,033 --> 00:24:14,433 In fact, I hate to do it. 588 00:24:14,433 --> 00:24:15,873 Do what? 589 00:24:15,866 --> 00:24:17,596 Sue you for a million dollars. 590 00:24:17,600 --> 00:24:18,600 What? 591 00:24:18,601 --> 00:24:19,801 For alienation of affection. 592 00:24:19,800 --> 00:24:21,200 Like you said, it's your fault 593 00:24:21,200 --> 00:24:24,000 that she's alienating me from her affection. 594 00:24:24,000 --> 00:24:25,300 Oh, wait a minute. 595 00:24:25,300 --> 00:24:26,400 If a little thing 596 00:24:26,400 --> 00:24:28,200 like a back injury is worth half a million, 597 00:24:28,200 --> 00:24:29,200 a broken heart 598 00:24:29,201 --> 00:24:30,601 has to be worth twice as much. 599 00:24:30,600 --> 00:24:32,300 Come on, let's go. 600 00:24:32,300 --> 00:24:33,930 But I'm willing to settle out of court. 601 00:24:33,933 --> 00:24:36,003 Come here, kids. 602 00:24:36,000 --> 00:24:37,130 What for? 603 00:24:37,133 --> 00:24:39,373 A million-dollar hug. 604 00:24:46,833 --> 00:24:49,533 [♪♪♪] 605 00:24:49,583 --> 00:24:54,133 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 41842

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