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1
00:00:02,293 --> 00:00:04,086
Here's what you missed
on Shameless last week.
2
00:00:05,463 --> 00:00:07,423
I got really drunk.
3
00:00:08,758 --> 00:00:11,260
And I'm not sure
what happened after that.
4
00:00:11,761 --> 00:00:13,637
What the hell is he doing here?
5
00:00:13,805 --> 00:00:16,598
I can't afford to live somewhere else
and support you two.
6
00:00:16,766 --> 00:00:18,017
- Hi, Frank.
- Shit!
7
00:00:20,270 --> 00:00:22,104
- Who the fuck's Tony?
- Tony, sweet.
8
00:00:22,272 --> 00:00:24,189
The cars I sell are mainly not mine.
9
00:00:24,357 --> 00:00:25,524
I like you, Fiona.
10
00:00:27,777 --> 00:00:29,153
You remember Steve?
11
00:00:31,448 --> 00:00:32,531
Yeah, how's it going?
12
00:00:32,699 --> 00:00:35,576
She doesn't care if you have a girlfriend.
Neither do I.
13
00:00:35,785 --> 00:00:37,286
- I'm getting married.
- You what?
14
00:00:37,454 --> 00:00:38,912
- Yeah!
- Ha, ha.
15
00:00:39,080 --> 00:00:41,540
Veronica, will you do me
the honor of being my wife?
16
00:00:41,708 --> 00:00:43,417
- Yes!
- You don't seem very happy...
17
00:00:43,585 --> 00:00:46,879
...to be getting married.
- It's because I'm already married.
18
00:01:58,409 --> 00:02:01,203
I wasn't thinking
about getting married. He brought it up.
19
00:02:01,371 --> 00:02:04,206
Now I'm, like, obsessed. Phillips.
20
00:02:04,374 --> 00:02:05,874
Wasn't he drunk when he proposed?
21
00:02:06,042 --> 00:02:10,254
Oh, yeah, it was like that David
Hasselhoff video, eating a cheeseburger.
22
00:02:10,421 --> 00:02:12,965
- I never saw that.
- Oh, YouTube it, it's a car wreck.
23
00:02:13,133 --> 00:02:14,758
You can't not watch.
24
00:02:15,677 --> 00:02:19,054
You want a drunk proposal to be
the story you tell your grand-kids?
25
00:02:19,222 --> 00:02:22,141
My husband proposed to me
at the top of the Sears Tower.
26
00:02:22,308 --> 00:02:24,560
Champagne and roses.
27
00:02:24,727 --> 00:02:28,856
Six months into the marriage
I found out he was fucking my sister.
28
00:02:29,023 --> 00:02:33,152
- And the moral of the story is?
- My sister's a bitch.
29
00:02:33,319 --> 00:02:36,697
Other than presents and booze,
give three reasons to get married.
30
00:02:36,906 --> 00:02:39,950
Lots of people who love each other
get married every day, Fiona.
31
00:02:41,911 --> 00:02:45,205
I don't know, V. The way things are
between you and Kevin right now...
32
00:02:45,415 --> 00:02:48,917
...it seems perfect. Why ruin it?
33
00:03:02,432 --> 00:03:04,433
What do you get for that?
34
00:03:04,601 --> 00:03:07,227
- What?
- What are they paying...
35
00:03:07,437 --> 00:03:09,438
...for the neck thing? Disability.
36
00:03:09,606 --> 00:03:12,482
Six hundred seventy-four bucks
a month.
37
00:03:15,278 --> 00:03:17,988
That's what I get, heh.
38
00:03:18,573 --> 00:03:20,741
But look, I can do this:
39
00:03:34,964 --> 00:03:39,968
While I admire your commitment,
I gotta tell you, it's a bit over the top.
40
00:03:45,767 --> 00:03:48,602
I told them I get migraines.
41
00:03:48,770 --> 00:03:50,812
- Genius, huh?
- Huh?
42
00:03:50,980 --> 00:03:53,690
- Try proving I don't have them, heh.
- Ugh.
43
00:03:56,319 --> 00:03:59,488
I bet it itches
like you got crabs in there.
44
00:04:12,210 --> 00:04:14,336
Kev, come out.
45
00:04:16,547 --> 00:04:19,091
- You done?
- Why are we getting married?
46
00:04:19,259 --> 00:04:21,593
- What?
- Other than the presents and the booze...
47
00:04:21,761 --> 00:04:25,180
...can you tell me three good reasons
why you want to get married?
48
00:04:26,224 --> 00:04:28,016
Not really. Wait a minute.
49
00:04:28,184 --> 00:04:31,895
This isn't one of those tests, is it? Where
I'm supposed to change your mind?
50
00:04:32,063 --> 00:04:34,147
Heh, if it is, you just failed.
51
00:04:34,315 --> 00:04:36,149
You don't want to get married?
52
00:04:36,317 --> 00:04:39,778
I mean, things between us
are pretty great. I don't want to ruin it.
53
00:04:39,946 --> 00:04:42,447
- What would we tell people?
- That the wedding's off.
54
00:04:42,615 --> 00:04:45,284
- No one's damn business why.
- Yeah?
55
00:04:45,451 --> 00:04:49,079
- Yeah.
- Well, great then.
56
00:04:52,834 --> 00:04:55,502
- Guess I gotta tell Momma.
- Oh, yeah.
57
00:04:55,670 --> 00:04:57,129
That's gonna suck.
58
00:04:57,297 --> 00:05:00,716
She's on her way over
to talk about the blessed event.
59
00:05:01,467 --> 00:05:04,553
I am gonna miss getting
a free KitchenAid mixer.
60
00:05:04,721 --> 00:05:07,389
Can you register for gifts
if you're not getting married?
61
00:05:07,557 --> 00:05:10,100
- I got a gift for you. Mm-hm.
- Yeah?
62
00:05:15,857 --> 00:05:17,357
Here comes the bride
63
00:05:17,525 --> 00:05:19,401
All dressed in white
64
00:05:19,569 --> 00:05:22,029
Which I think you can
still get away with, baby.
65
00:05:23,865 --> 00:05:25,615
Hey, Momma.
66
00:05:27,910 --> 00:05:30,412
Oh, I can't believe it.
Oh, I can't believe it!
67
00:05:30,580 --> 00:05:33,081
I can't believe this. What happened?
68
00:05:33,249 --> 00:05:35,542
- Nothing happened.
- How could you do this to me?
69
00:05:35,710 --> 00:05:38,545
Look, nothing's gonna change.
Kev and I are still together.
70
00:05:38,713 --> 00:05:41,423
- Yeah, Momma...
- Don't call me Momma.
71
00:05:41,591 --> 00:05:44,176
We're just cutting out
all the paperwork. Right?
72
00:05:44,344 --> 00:05:47,512
You know, and besides,
until gay people...
73
00:05:47,680 --> 00:05:49,806
...can get married in this state...
74
00:05:51,309 --> 00:05:52,601
...I'm not gonna.
75
00:05:52,769 --> 00:05:55,896
This isn't what your father wants.
You know that, don't you?
76
00:05:56,105 --> 00:05:57,773
Daddy's dead.
He doesn't want anything.
77
00:05:57,940 --> 00:06:02,069
Your daddy, rest his soul,
wants to see his little girl married.
78
00:06:02,236 --> 00:06:04,821
- Look, Momma, I...
- He set a little something aside...
79
00:06:04,989 --> 00:06:07,157
...for you for once
you finally settled down.
80
00:06:07,325 --> 00:06:09,201
- A little what?
- Daddy left you money...
81
00:06:09,369 --> 00:06:12,162
...for your first home
once you got married.
82
00:06:12,330 --> 00:06:14,331
- A house?
- He thought it might keep you...
83
00:06:14,499 --> 00:06:16,958
- ...from being somebody's baby-momma.
- How much?
84
00:06:17,126 --> 00:06:20,962
I don't know, he wanted the envelope
opened on your wedding day.
85
00:06:21,130 --> 00:06:23,423
Now I guess we'll never know.
86
00:06:24,467 --> 00:06:27,386
I just... I never knew
how much it meant to Daddy.
87
00:06:27,553 --> 00:06:29,930
The world.
88
00:06:30,139 --> 00:06:32,015
Maybe we should reconsider, babe.
89
00:06:32,183 --> 00:06:34,184
Heh, but what about the gay people?
90
00:06:34,352 --> 00:06:36,686
They got their parades, they can wait.
91
00:06:38,773 --> 00:06:42,484
It's hot. I'm hot.
Ahem, are you guys hot?
92
00:06:45,571 --> 00:06:46,822
Hot.
93
00:06:49,283 --> 00:06:51,743
- Fiona.
- Coming.
94
00:07:03,673 --> 00:07:06,049
- Hi.
- Hey.
95
00:07:06,217 --> 00:07:08,677
- Oh, it's fresh?
- And clean as a whistle.
96
00:07:08,845 --> 00:07:11,930
Thanks, Fiona. You have
no idea what this means to me.
97
00:07:12,098 --> 00:07:15,642
Means you get to smoke weed and keep
your government job and I get to eat.
98
00:07:15,810 --> 00:07:18,228
It's lasagna, straight from the oven.
Still warm.
99
00:07:18,396 --> 00:07:21,064
So's this.
Keep it that way if you wanna pass.
100
00:07:21,232 --> 00:07:26,445
- Lunch. Eat it or miss it, people.
- Thanks. Bye.
101
00:07:26,612 --> 00:07:28,697
- What, more piss food?
- You know it.
102
00:07:28,865 --> 00:07:30,407
All right.
103
00:07:32,326 --> 00:07:34,411
- Cup-a-lasagna, anyone?
- Right here.
104
00:07:34,579 --> 00:07:38,665
- Who was on dishes today?
- Uh, I'll get them after lunch.
105
00:07:38,833 --> 00:07:40,083
Hey, Debs...
106
00:07:40,251 --> 00:07:42,586
- ...you ready to go to Target?
- Oh, yeah. Sure.
107
00:07:42,753 --> 00:07:44,463
What's that smell?
108
00:07:44,630 --> 00:07:48,133
- It's either vomit or fancy cheese.
- It can be both if you want.
109
00:07:48,801 --> 00:07:52,053
- Target?
- Deb's gonna go help me register gifts.
110
00:07:52,221 --> 00:07:53,430
Mm, good.
111
00:07:53,598 --> 00:07:56,266
- I thought the wedding was off.
- Back on.
112
00:07:57,477 --> 00:07:58,810
- Kev know?
Mm-hm.
113
00:07:59,479 --> 00:08:00,979
Oh.
114
00:08:01,439 --> 00:08:03,482
- Hey.
- Damn.
115
00:08:03,649 --> 00:08:08,153
Tell that girl I will crap on a paper plate
for her if it gets me some of this grub.
116
00:08:21,167 --> 00:08:23,460
- Francis Gallagher.
- Yeah.
117
00:08:31,761 --> 00:08:33,303
Drop your pants.
118
00:08:33,471 --> 00:08:37,307
I don't see how this has any bearings
on my migraines.
119
00:08:37,475 --> 00:08:40,602
Me neither, but it's on the state form.
120
00:08:40,770 --> 00:08:41,811
Drop them, sailor.
121
00:08:45,858 --> 00:08:47,901
- Unh.
- Still cold, ha, ha.
122
00:08:48,069 --> 00:08:49,277
- Cough.
- Ahem.
123
00:08:50,029 --> 00:08:51,071
Again.
124
00:08:52,448 --> 00:08:53,448
Again.
125
00:08:54,992 --> 00:08:56,159
That's weird.
126
00:08:56,786 --> 00:09:00,121
Have you ever done
a testicular self-examination?
127
00:09:00,289 --> 00:09:03,875
Oh, God, no. I say leave those three
bad boys down there alone.
128
00:09:04,043 --> 00:09:05,877
Yeah, well, that's the problem.
129
00:09:06,045 --> 00:09:09,005
Should only be two testicles
invited to this party.
130
00:09:09,173 --> 00:09:11,466
- What's this?
- I need you and your testicles...
131
00:09:11,634 --> 00:09:13,468
...back here tomorrow for a biopsy.
132
00:09:13,636 --> 00:09:16,596
So I got an extra passenger on board,
what's the big deal?
133
00:09:16,806 --> 00:09:18,723
- Normal number's two.
- Not for me.
134
00:09:18,891 --> 00:09:21,851
Third guy's always been there.
He's my lucky charm. Gave me six kids.
135
00:09:22,019 --> 00:09:23,311
Hmm.
136
00:09:23,688 --> 00:09:25,605
Probably benign, then.
137
00:09:25,815 --> 00:09:28,984
You're smart not to worry
until you do a biopsy.
138
00:09:29,151 --> 00:09:31,152
Gives you something to worry about.
139
00:09:40,496 --> 00:09:42,914
Uh, you can't bring a baby
into a bar, ma'am.
140
00:09:43,082 --> 00:09:45,166
You can't get married
if you already are.
141
00:09:45,334 --> 00:09:46,751
I know, I know.
142
00:09:46,919 --> 00:09:48,962
- Why the hell doesn't she know?
- Because.
143
00:09:49,130 --> 00:09:50,797
- I'm afraid to tell her.
- Kev!
144
00:09:50,965 --> 00:09:54,509
I don't wanna make her sad, Fi.
It would break my heart to hurt her.
145
00:09:55,428 --> 00:09:59,556
Just tell her the truth, Kev.
If you don't, I will.
146
00:10:02,685 --> 00:10:04,686
Can you hit me with a milk refill?
147
00:10:06,355 --> 00:10:09,608
The devil's in my balls, Billy.
And he's coming for the rest of me.
148
00:10:09,775 --> 00:10:12,068
- Let's hope he can swim.
- Why, Billy?
149
00:10:12,236 --> 00:10:13,320
Why me?
150
00:10:13,487 --> 00:10:18,241
- Because you're an asshole, Frank.
- Doc says it's probably benign.
151
00:10:18,409 --> 00:10:21,328
Look at Lance Armstrong,
he had that ball cancer.
152
00:10:21,495 --> 00:10:25,540
- Ends up fucking a rock star.
- That's right. That's... See?
153
00:10:25,708 --> 00:10:28,043
- Hey, baby.
- Hey, hey!
154
00:10:28,210 --> 00:10:29,294
Mm-hm.
155
00:10:30,713 --> 00:10:32,088
Okay, I know this is silly.
156
00:10:32,256 --> 00:10:35,592
But I'm really starting to get excited
about this whole wedding thing.
157
00:10:35,760 --> 00:10:39,429
The gifts and the wedding,
and being Mrs. Kevin Ball.
158
00:10:41,140 --> 00:10:43,099
You know old man Parson's place
on 5th?
159
00:10:43,267 --> 00:10:45,935
- I think we should buy it.
- What?
160
00:10:46,103 --> 00:10:48,813
The one where the son went crazy
and hit him with an ax?
161
00:10:48,981 --> 00:10:51,775
It's for sale. We should start
getting our stuff together.
162
00:10:51,942 --> 00:10:55,111
All the loans
and credit scores and all that.
163
00:10:55,279 --> 00:10:56,613
What's the matter, babe?
164
00:10:56,781 --> 00:10:59,824
I'm sure they got the blood
cleaned up by now.
165
00:11:05,289 --> 00:11:07,207
I can't marry you, Veronica.
166
00:11:10,419 --> 00:11:12,545
I'm already married.
167
00:11:15,049 --> 00:11:17,425
She's beautiful.
168
00:11:18,135 --> 00:11:20,512
She's a head-case.
She used to throw plates at me.
169
00:11:20,680 --> 00:11:23,932
Couldn't handle her booze.
That's how I got scars on my neck.
170
00:11:24,100 --> 00:11:27,394
You have no idea how many times
I wanted to tell you over the years.
171
00:11:27,561 --> 00:11:30,939
But the more time went on,
the more unreal it all seemed.
172
00:11:32,733 --> 00:11:34,859
You look like a douche bag
with that mullet.
173
00:11:36,529 --> 00:11:38,863
Oh, I can't believe this.
174
00:11:39,031 --> 00:11:40,949
Guess I can forget
about buying a house.
175
00:11:41,117 --> 00:11:42,617
Yeah.
176
00:11:42,785 --> 00:11:45,036
- Maybe not.
- What do you mean?
177
00:11:45,204 --> 00:11:48,665
You don't actually have to get married.
Your mom wants a wedding.
178
00:11:48,833 --> 00:11:51,459
So give her one.
179
00:11:51,627 --> 00:11:53,461
I could get ordained online.
180
00:11:53,629 --> 00:11:55,880
Then we don't file the license
with the state.
181
00:11:56,048 --> 00:11:57,716
- Ha-ha-ha.
- A fake wedding.
182
00:11:59,468 --> 00:12:03,722
Why not? You'd still be married.
It just won't be legal.
183
00:12:04,181 --> 00:12:07,142
- Yeah, but what's the point, then?
- All the free shit, baby.
184
00:12:09,061 --> 00:12:11,563
- Oh, damn. That would've sucked.
- Baby, come on.
185
00:12:11,731 --> 00:12:15,066
Showing up at your wedding
fucking paralyzed and shit? Yeah.
186
00:12:15,234 --> 00:12:16,693
Oh, shit.
187
00:12:18,654 --> 00:12:22,198
It looks a bit like Top Ramen
in there, doesn't it?
188
00:12:24,535 --> 00:12:28,663
Sweetie, would you like me
to come with you to your biopsy?
189
00:12:28,831 --> 00:12:30,915
No, it's probably nothing.
190
00:12:31,083 --> 00:12:33,418
Benign cyst. An ingrown hair.
191
00:12:33,586 --> 00:12:35,420
Yes, I think you're right.
192
00:12:35,588 --> 00:12:38,506
You're gonna be just fine.
193
00:12:42,511 --> 00:12:43,887
Why the hell are you crying?
194
00:12:49,560 --> 00:12:52,562
I knew it was too good to be true.
195
00:12:52,730 --> 00:12:54,147
You're gonna die.
196
00:12:54,315 --> 00:12:57,859
Jesus, Sheila. I'm not gonna die.
I haven't even had the biopsy yet.
197
00:12:58,027 --> 00:13:01,696
It was probably that nut-vise sex toy
of hers that gave you the damn cancer.
198
00:13:01,864 --> 00:13:04,407
I'm gonna need the house next week
for bible study.
199
00:13:04,575 --> 00:13:08,369
We're doing the Passion play again.
It might get noisy.
200
00:13:17,379 --> 00:13:20,256
I have two plots...
201
00:13:20,424 --> 00:13:21,925
...at Oak Woods Cemetery.
202
00:13:22,092 --> 00:13:23,676
One was for Eddie.
203
00:13:23,844 --> 00:13:29,224
Nothing would make me happier
than to bury you in one of them.
204
00:13:29,975 --> 00:13:32,227
Wait there for me.
205
00:13:32,978 --> 00:13:34,771
Oh, God.
206
00:13:34,939 --> 00:13:36,564
I'm gonna die.
207
00:13:38,859 --> 00:13:41,569
He married your father and I,
Aunt Rochelle, Uncle Bobby.
208
00:13:41,737 --> 00:13:44,823
And cousin Jimmy with that first wife,
with the cleft palate.
209
00:13:44,990 --> 00:13:48,451
A cleft palate is merely
the mark God leaves...
210
00:13:48,619 --> 00:13:51,579
...when he kisses a person
before they're born.
211
00:13:51,747 --> 00:13:53,748
Girl's momma
just skipped the folic acid.
212
00:13:53,916 --> 00:13:59,504
I'm gonna need you both to come to my
weekend Engagement Encounter retreat.
213
00:13:59,672 --> 00:14:02,382
It covers all of the Pre-Cana material...
214
00:14:02,591 --> 00:14:05,677
...necessary for you to get married
with God's blessing.
215
00:14:05,845 --> 00:14:08,096
Uh, could you excuse us
for just a second, please?
216
00:14:10,474 --> 00:14:12,559
Might be fun to do it
at a church outing, huh?
217
00:14:12,726 --> 00:14:15,103
Veronica, that man in there is a priest.
218
00:14:15,271 --> 00:14:18,398
He's gonna require a license.
A marriage license.
219
00:14:18,607 --> 00:14:21,776
I'm pretty sure bigamy
is still a felony in the state of Illinois.
220
00:14:21,944 --> 00:14:23,862
Why'd you let your mom
drag us here?
221
00:14:24,029 --> 00:14:26,281
- Momma wasn't gonna take no.
- What about Fiona?
222
00:14:26,448 --> 00:14:28,950
- Wasn't she gonna marry us?
- Relax, baby, I got this.
223
00:14:30,786 --> 00:14:33,955
Momma, we already have someone
that's gonna do the wedding for us.
224
00:14:34,123 --> 00:14:36,624
This some healing hands, voodoo,
wheat-grass jackass?
225
00:14:36,792 --> 00:14:39,961
Because that's not a wedding
in the Lord's eyes. Tell them, Father.
226
00:14:40,129 --> 00:14:43,423
Tell them that is not a wedding
in the Lord's eyes.
227
00:14:43,591 --> 00:14:49,971
Well, I know this. That just like
the honeybee, God has many eyes.
228
00:14:51,181 --> 00:14:54,058
Look, it has to be a priest.
That's what your father wanted.
229
00:14:54,226 --> 00:14:56,686
That's what I want.
And that's what the Lord wants.
230
00:14:59,231 --> 00:15:01,399
- Wedding's not gonna work.
- What happened?
231
00:15:01,609 --> 00:15:03,151
Momma wants a real priest.
232
00:15:03,319 --> 00:15:05,320
Sheila said she'd make
your wedding dress.
233
00:15:05,487 --> 00:15:08,990
Oh, that's nice, but what good is
the dress if I don't have a priest?
234
00:15:09,158 --> 00:15:13,036
You could hire an actor. Remember
the guy who played Elmo at my birthday?
235
00:15:13,203 --> 00:15:15,580
- You remember that?
- He took his head off.
236
00:15:15,748 --> 00:15:18,750
- It was traumatizing.
- Think an actor could work?
237
00:15:18,918 --> 00:15:22,003
I can probably get Father Pete to do it,
if Carl will help.
238
00:15:22,171 --> 00:15:26,090
- What's it gonna cost me?
- Uh, Karen and I use your place Friday?
239
00:15:26,258 --> 00:15:28,843
- Done.
- Father Pete? The groper?
240
00:15:29,011 --> 00:15:30,136
God willing.
241
00:15:30,679 --> 00:15:33,848
- We got hot dogs?
- Hmm, no hot dogs.
242
00:15:40,189 --> 00:15:41,731
What?
243
00:15:47,363 --> 00:15:48,905
Excuse me.
244
00:15:49,073 --> 00:15:50,365
Better late than never.
245
00:15:50,532 --> 00:15:53,534
Even better on time.
What's with the costume?
246
00:15:53,702 --> 00:15:56,579
ROTC.
I made cadet lieutenant colonel today.
247
00:15:56,747 --> 00:15:58,373
- You did? That's great.
- Yeah.
248
00:15:58,540 --> 00:15:59,707
Congratulations.
249
00:15:59,875 --> 00:16:04,045
When I get back, I want the stock shelved
with all labels facing the same direction.
250
00:16:04,213 --> 00:16:07,131
- Where are you going?
- Your head is like a funnel.
251
00:16:07,299 --> 00:16:10,718
- The Boy Scout trip is this weekend.
- They have Muslim Boy Scouts?
252
00:16:10,886 --> 00:16:12,720
Similar. Motto is still "Be Prepared."
253
00:16:12,888 --> 00:16:14,555
But you learn how to work
with chemicals instead of tying knots.
254
00:16:16,100 --> 00:16:18,267
The troop is sponsored
by the Baptist church.
255
00:16:18,435 --> 00:16:20,478
They give us free outfits
and overnights...
256
00:16:20,688 --> 00:16:23,731
...and we let them think
we're assimilating. Everybody wins.
257
00:16:23,899 --> 00:16:25,900
I'll be back Sunday night.
258
00:16:28,237 --> 00:16:31,155
Lieutenant colonel?
I am so proud of you.
259
00:16:31,323 --> 00:16:32,991
It's not that big of a deal.
260
00:16:33,200 --> 00:16:35,326
Linda and the boys are gone
for two nights.
261
00:16:35,494 --> 00:16:38,329
We're gonna have a whole night together
to celebrate.
262
00:16:58,684 --> 00:17:00,476
Unh, oh, God!
263
00:17:00,644 --> 00:17:03,521
- God, I'm sorry.
- Oh, Jesus Christ.
264
00:17:03,731 --> 00:17:06,441
Was that the biopsy?
God, right in the...
265
00:17:06,608 --> 00:17:08,651
Here, let's take a look.
266
00:17:08,986 --> 00:17:11,779
- Unh.
- I'm just gonna take a look.
267
00:17:15,242 --> 00:17:18,453
Okay, well, that is definitely better.
268
00:17:19,538 --> 00:17:23,708
- I think you're okay.
- Well, now, yeah.
269
00:17:23,876 --> 00:17:25,793
I'm just gonna shave you, okay?
270
00:17:29,965 --> 00:17:32,050
I've never been shaved
down there before.
271
00:17:32,259 --> 00:17:34,969
Just doing a small section.
272
00:17:41,310 --> 00:17:43,394
Okay. Oh.
273
00:17:43,562 --> 00:17:45,480
I'm sorry about that.
274
00:17:49,818 --> 00:17:53,321
Maybe I could come back later
and you could shave the other two.
275
00:17:56,784 --> 00:17:59,660
- There. All done.
- Ooh.
276
00:18:00,162 --> 00:18:02,497
Feels like spring.
277
00:18:04,541 --> 00:18:07,502
Wish I could say
this wasn't gonna hurt.
278
00:18:10,923 --> 00:18:14,383
You don't have to go crazy, Sheila,
but as close to Vera Wang as you can.
279
00:18:14,551 --> 00:18:16,677
You are going to make a beautiful bride.
280
00:18:16,845 --> 00:18:20,556
Oh, Sheila, you're making me
feel like Cinderella.
281
00:18:20,724 --> 00:18:23,226
Screw Cinderella.
Little doe-eyed bitch.
282
00:18:23,393 --> 00:18:26,562
Probably one of the worst
role models for little girls.
283
00:18:26,730 --> 00:18:29,190
I think Cinderella was a feminist.
284
00:18:29,358 --> 00:18:33,611
The whole idea of marriage is a useless
vestige of an archaic civilization.
285
00:18:33,821 --> 00:18:36,864
- How would you know?
- I watched one unravel.
286
00:18:37,032 --> 00:18:40,868
Oh, so one example of a bad one
makes them all bad? Hmm?
287
00:18:41,036 --> 00:18:44,622
Marriage was nothing more than
a legal exchange of women for property.
288
00:18:44,832 --> 00:18:48,126
- Maybe you're being a little pessimistic.
- Heh, it's just a piece of paper.
289
00:18:48,335 --> 00:18:51,212
A birth certificate is just a piece of paper.
290
00:18:51,380 --> 00:18:54,257
And money.
Money is just a piece of paper.
291
00:18:54,424 --> 00:18:57,426
- But those are pretty valuable.
- True.
292
00:18:57,594 --> 00:19:00,304
Hey, Gloria Steinem,
enough of the blah-blah.
293
00:19:00,472 --> 00:19:03,224
- Let's talk bachelorette party.
- I got that covered.
294
00:19:03,392 --> 00:19:05,017
- Oh, you better.
- Mm-hm.
295
00:19:05,185 --> 00:19:06,769
Because we gonna be doing it.
296
00:19:06,937 --> 00:19:09,230
- What the...? Uh-huh. Mm-hm.
- Single ladies, go on.
297
00:19:10,399 --> 00:19:13,734
Feeling sick. Feeling tired.
298
00:19:13,902 --> 00:19:17,864
Seeing more of my oncologist
than I see of my whole family.
299
00:19:18,949 --> 00:19:23,452
The hardest thing for me to accept
is the fact that I can't fix this.
300
00:19:23,620 --> 00:19:26,080
I'm used to being the mom, you know?
301
00:19:26,248 --> 00:19:29,876
The one who takes care
of everyone and everything.
302
00:19:31,170 --> 00:19:32,378
The fixer.
303
00:19:33,255 --> 00:19:35,590
And this is breast cancer.
304
00:19:35,757 --> 00:19:38,259
I can't fix this.
305
00:19:40,304 --> 00:19:43,764
Just knowing your tits
are trying to kill you.
306
00:19:43,932 --> 00:19:45,474
That's gotta suck.
307
00:19:46,268 --> 00:19:48,144
I mean, mine's in my balls.
308
00:19:48,312 --> 00:19:50,771
So they've got a reason to be pissed.
309
00:19:50,939 --> 00:19:54,609
Tucked between two legs,
wedged right near your asshole.
310
00:19:54,776 --> 00:19:59,363
There's no good way to sit,
no underwear that's been devised...
311
00:19:59,531 --> 00:20:02,366
...to hold them effectively in place.
312
00:20:02,534 --> 00:20:05,369
They're a bizarre appendage.
An afterthought.
313
00:20:05,537 --> 00:20:09,290
Which is why I don't believe
in intelligent design.
314
00:20:10,042 --> 00:20:11,500
There is no God.
315
00:20:12,628 --> 00:20:14,962
We're all gonna die.
316
00:20:19,468 --> 00:20:21,177
Why do I have to do it?
317
00:20:21,345 --> 00:20:23,846
You're the only one young enough
to be an altar boy.
318
00:20:24,014 --> 00:20:26,557
- We'll stop before anything goes down.
- Or anyone.
319
00:20:32,314 --> 00:20:34,315
The Gallagher boys.
320
00:20:34,483 --> 00:20:37,068
If you're here to steal
the basket, you're out of luck.
321
00:20:37,236 --> 00:20:38,819
Already off to the bank.
322
00:20:38,987 --> 00:20:42,907
No, Carl here
is interested in being an altar boy.
323
00:20:43,075 --> 00:20:46,369
- That's a big responsibility.
- Yeah. We tried talking him out of it.
324
00:20:46,536 --> 00:20:49,163
But he cried,
so we thought we'd bring him in.
325
00:20:49,331 --> 00:20:51,666
See if you thought he had what it takes.
326
00:20:51,875 --> 00:20:53,209
Hello there, Carl.
327
00:20:54,503 --> 00:20:56,712
Be back for you in a bit, bud.
328
00:21:01,843 --> 00:21:03,678
- Whew.
- Wanna watch Scarface again tonight?
329
00:21:03,845 --> 00:21:06,013
Can't, got a date.
330
00:21:06,348 --> 00:21:08,516
Ooh. Mandy date or Kash date?
331
00:21:09,268 --> 00:21:10,893
Kash date.
332
00:21:11,395 --> 00:21:13,354
You're a slut, man.
333
00:21:14,856 --> 00:21:16,232
Shit.
334
00:21:20,529 --> 00:21:21,862
Looks like we have a priest
for V's wedding.
335
00:21:23,991 --> 00:21:26,200
- Fake priest?
- No, no. Priest is real.
336
00:21:26,368 --> 00:21:28,536
We're just not gonna file the license.
337
00:21:28,704 --> 00:21:30,871
Immoral, don't you think?
Lying to God's face.
338
00:21:31,039 --> 00:21:32,581
- Really, Mr. Morality.
- Hmm.
339
00:21:32,749 --> 00:21:35,418
- Whose car is this?
- Not like I have a priest in the back.
340
00:21:35,585 --> 00:21:38,587
- Are you still picking up the cake?
- Angelica's Bakery.
341
00:21:38,755 --> 00:21:42,633
Can Kev and V use this car
for their big exit after the reception?
342
00:21:43,218 --> 00:21:46,721
Yeah, think that could work.
I just... I need it back right after.
343
00:21:46,888 --> 00:21:48,639
- Okay.
- Can't do anything bad to it.
344
00:21:48,807 --> 00:21:50,391
And no sex in it.
345
00:21:50,559 --> 00:21:52,643
No sex in it?
346
00:21:54,521 --> 00:21:57,857
I just need this thing in perfect condition.
All right, Fiona. I just...
347
00:21:59,318 --> 00:22:00,401
Whoa, whoa!
348
00:22:01,778 --> 00:22:02,945
- Oh, damn it. Damn it!
- Jesus.
349
00:22:03,113 --> 00:22:04,739
Relax. Relax. It happens.
350
00:22:04,906 --> 00:22:07,450
- Okay?
- Yeah, what happens, prison time?
351
00:22:17,919 --> 00:22:19,253
Hey.
352
00:22:19,421 --> 00:22:22,590
- Fiona, I thought that was you.
- Your uniform looks different.
353
00:22:22,758 --> 00:22:25,259
Yeah, they issued new coats.
354
00:22:25,427 --> 00:22:27,678
See you at Kev and Veronica's
wedding tomorrow?
355
00:22:27,846 --> 00:22:29,263
Yeah.
356
00:22:29,806 --> 00:22:32,433
- I need your license and registration.
- What? Why?
357
00:22:32,601 --> 00:22:34,602
Officer, sir.
358
00:22:34,770 --> 00:22:36,187
You were doing 35 in a 25.
359
00:22:36,355 --> 00:22:38,189
There was some swerving, kind of weird.
360
00:22:38,357 --> 00:22:40,941
Here's my license,
but I don't have the registration.
361
00:22:41,109 --> 00:22:42,318
It's my friend's car.
362
00:22:42,486 --> 00:22:45,446
You really are supposed
to have that on you at all times.
363
00:22:45,614 --> 00:22:47,698
Lemme see what I can do.
I'll be right back.
364
00:22:47,866 --> 00:22:50,159
Okay.
Why did you give him your license?
365
00:22:50,327 --> 00:22:52,661
- That's not my real license.
- So now what? Run?
366
00:22:52,829 --> 00:22:54,663
No, that never works.
367
00:22:55,874 --> 00:22:58,793
Jesús, you got me?
Yeah, thanks, buddy.
368
00:22:58,960 --> 00:23:01,045
- Who's Jesús?
- Follow car.
369
00:23:01,213 --> 00:23:02,630
Always use a follow car.
370
00:23:15,727 --> 00:23:18,020
Watch your speed.
See you at the wedding, Fi.
371
00:23:18,188 --> 00:23:20,689
- Okay!
- Out.
372
00:23:20,857 --> 00:23:22,525
- What?
- Get out.
373
00:23:27,989 --> 00:23:28,989
What about the car?
374
00:23:30,117 --> 00:23:31,492
Taken care of.
375
00:23:38,667 --> 00:23:42,420
- My heart's in my throat right now.
- That's adrenaline. Kind of cool isn't it?
376
00:23:54,558 --> 00:23:56,350
- I'll see you at the wedding.
- What?
377
00:23:56,518 --> 00:23:59,353
- Angelica's Bakery, right?
- Yeah. Right.
378
00:24:01,940 --> 00:24:05,192
I've decided to start
wearing a tie every day.
379
00:24:05,360 --> 00:24:08,279
I could die at any moment.
380
00:24:09,030 --> 00:24:13,200
I thought it'd be nice to look
my best for the grim reaper.
381
00:24:13,368 --> 00:24:15,870
Son of a bitch.
382
00:24:18,206 --> 00:24:20,458
You know what? Fuck him.
383
00:24:21,376 --> 00:24:22,877
Fuck him!
384
00:24:23,044 --> 00:24:25,713
Why give him the satisfaction?
I'll do it myself.
385
00:24:25,881 --> 00:24:28,799
Take my own goddamn life.
386
00:24:30,677 --> 00:24:32,219
You know...
387
00:24:32,387 --> 00:24:34,430
You know what the real shame
of it is, Kev?
388
00:24:34,598 --> 00:24:36,056
The real shame...
389
00:24:36,224 --> 00:24:41,437
...is there are so many things
I still want to do.
390
00:24:41,605 --> 00:24:43,230
Oh, yeah, like what?
391
00:24:45,066 --> 00:24:46,150
Pfft!
392
00:24:46,318 --> 00:24:49,320
Jesus Christ, I don't know.
393
00:24:49,488 --> 00:24:50,988
I don't know.
394
00:24:51,198 --> 00:24:55,159
How sad is that? A man doesn't
even know what he wants to do.
395
00:24:55,327 --> 00:24:56,368
Woo-hoo-hoo!
396
00:24:56,536 --> 00:24:58,829
- Hey, buddy.
- What's going on?
397
00:24:59,748 --> 00:25:01,916
- What's this?
- You gotta wear it tonight...
398
00:25:02,083 --> 00:25:04,460
...for the bachelor party.
Everyone's gonna wear one.
399
00:25:04,628 --> 00:25:07,129
- Andy, get the fuck out...
- Don't be a dick, dude.
400
00:25:07,297 --> 00:25:09,798
- Fucking wear it.
- Bachelor party?
401
00:25:10,800 --> 00:25:13,427
Yeah, if you wanna go, you can come.
402
00:25:13,845 --> 00:25:15,679
What's the plan?
403
00:25:15,847 --> 00:25:18,641
Uh, me and my friends are gonna get
wasted and do stupid shit.
404
00:25:18,808 --> 00:25:21,268
But we gotta get you one of these.
405
00:25:24,147 --> 00:25:25,731
Awesome.
406
00:25:26,942 --> 00:25:30,027
Is the blindfold for surprise
or so I don't know where you live?
407
00:25:30,237 --> 00:25:32,238
- Little of both.
- Ooh.
408
00:25:35,116 --> 00:25:37,409
- Ah.
- Ta-da.
409
00:25:38,745 --> 00:25:40,287
Oh.
410
00:25:42,165 --> 00:25:43,791
Oh.
411
00:25:44,125 --> 00:25:47,044
Wow, yeah. This is your house.
412
00:25:47,254 --> 00:25:49,213
Where you live with Linda.
413
00:25:49,381 --> 00:25:52,508
- And the kids.
- Right now, it's our house.
414
00:26:14,990 --> 00:26:18,492
- What's wrong?
- Sorry, it's just... It's too weird.
415
00:26:18,660 --> 00:26:21,078
- What is?
- All of your shit, it's...
416
00:26:21,288 --> 00:26:24,415
It's freaking me out.
And it smells like goats in here.
417
00:26:24,583 --> 00:26:26,792
Ian, wait.
418
00:26:45,437 --> 00:26:48,063
Why would she do it
in the first place?
419
00:26:48,231 --> 00:26:49,690
Because she could.
420
00:26:49,858 --> 00:26:53,193
She was, like, one of those
weird Chinese acrobats.
421
00:26:53,361 --> 00:26:55,904
No, those girls are all tiny
and cute when they do it.
422
00:26:56,072 --> 00:26:58,532
She was like Pippi Longstocking
kissing her own ass.
423
00:26:59,951 --> 00:27:03,871
- Jesus.
- Dad, what the hell happened to you?
424
00:27:04,039 --> 00:27:07,374
Cord was too long. I got three nuts.
425
00:27:07,542 --> 00:27:09,460
Gonna die.
426
00:27:32,400 --> 00:27:33,859
Fuck.
427
00:28:12,774 --> 00:28:15,859
- Marty?
- Surprise, heh.
428
00:28:16,027 --> 00:28:18,696
I'm maid of honor
and I didn't know you had a brother.
429
00:28:18,905 --> 00:28:21,532
- There's a reason for that.
- He busted out of prison?
430
00:28:21,700 --> 00:28:23,617
- Last night.
- What was he in for?
431
00:28:23,785 --> 00:28:27,830
- Aggravated assault, larceny and arson.
- Arson? Who you talking about?
432
00:28:27,997 --> 00:28:29,164
V's brother.
433
00:28:29,332 --> 00:28:33,001
Oh, is that, like, a sibling brother,
or just a black-guy brother?
434
00:28:33,169 --> 00:28:35,796
Remember the fire at Curves
in the mall? That was him.
435
00:28:35,964 --> 00:28:38,632
He loves setting fire to things
and he hates women.
436
00:28:38,800 --> 00:28:40,634
- It was the perfect storm.
- He's nuts.
437
00:28:40,802 --> 00:28:44,304
Serious, he's nuts. He came at me.
I had to fight my ass off.
438
00:28:44,472 --> 00:28:47,141
Then one time I'm having a brew,
he came up to me, all:
439
00:28:47,308 --> 00:28:50,144
- "Ass cunt fuck!" on me.
- Is he retarded?
440
00:28:50,311 --> 00:28:53,731
I wish. Tourette's coupled with bipolar
disorder and a drinking problem.
441
00:28:53,940 --> 00:28:55,983
He's a shrink's wet dream.
442
00:28:56,484 --> 00:28:59,319
- What are we gonna do?
- Kick his ass back to prison.
443
00:28:59,487 --> 00:29:03,574
If there's one person you can always
count on to fuck things up, it's Marty.
444
00:29:03,742 --> 00:29:06,535
- Bungee jumping, eh?
- From the L tracks.
445
00:29:06,703 --> 00:29:10,372
Good news/bad: Your biopsy
results came back negative.
446
00:29:10,540 --> 00:29:14,001
Tumor was benign, so you're not
gonna die of testicular cancer.
447
00:29:14,169 --> 00:29:19,047
Oh, thank God. So I can keep it?
448
00:29:19,215 --> 00:29:21,425
Yeah, but the swelling on your brain...
449
00:29:21,593 --> 00:29:24,845
...you probably got going on in there
might end up doing you in.
450
00:29:25,013 --> 00:29:26,555
- What?
- I'm fucking with you.
451
00:29:27,182 --> 00:29:29,224
Bump looks pretty superficial.
452
00:29:29,392 --> 00:29:32,227
If you vomit more than twice,
have any seizures...
453
00:29:32,395 --> 00:29:35,105
...or experience memory loss,
call 911.
454
00:29:35,273 --> 00:29:40,861
Well, what if I vomit while I'm having a
seizure, and have no memory of it?
455
00:29:41,029 --> 00:29:42,321
Tree in the forest, my friend.
456
00:29:43,865 --> 00:29:45,491
What?
457
00:29:48,703 --> 00:29:51,997
You know you can't stay, Marty.
You gotta go back to prison.
458
00:29:52,582 --> 00:29:55,918
Ron, it's bullshit security.
They practically give you your own key.
459
00:29:56,085 --> 00:29:58,587
Aren't you risking parole?
How long do you have left?
460
00:29:58,755 --> 00:30:00,589
Eighteen... Cocksucker! ...months.
461
00:30:00,757 --> 00:30:03,926
- Jesus, Marty. That's no time at all.
- It's your wedding day, Ron.
462
00:30:04,093 --> 00:30:08,096
Why don't you turn yourself in? Tell them
it was a mistake. Blame the Tourette's.
463
00:30:08,264 --> 00:30:11,308
Tell them it won't happen again.
You know it's for the best.
464
00:30:11,518 --> 00:30:13,060
Faggot!
465
00:30:13,728 --> 00:30:16,396
We'll have you back
before they even know you left.
466
00:30:16,564 --> 00:30:18,106
I'm not going back, Ron.
467
00:30:18,274 --> 00:30:22,903
It's your wedding. I'm not gonna miss
your... Shit-pisser! ...wedding day.
468
00:30:30,286 --> 00:30:32,162
This is the dress...
469
00:30:32,330 --> 00:30:35,290
...that I will wear this afternoon.
470
00:30:37,126 --> 00:30:39,336
And it will protect me...
471
00:30:39,546 --> 00:30:41,755
...like this house protects me.
472
00:30:42,423 --> 00:30:45,050
This is the dress.
473
00:30:45,677 --> 00:30:47,928
And today is the day.
474
00:30:48,096 --> 00:30:50,764
And the day is good.
475
00:30:50,932 --> 00:30:53,684
You look nice.
Where are you pretending to go?
476
00:30:53,852 --> 00:30:56,770
I'm going to a wedding today.
477
00:30:57,313 --> 00:30:59,815
I am really gonna do it this time.
478
00:30:59,983 --> 00:31:03,277
And it's supposed to be
a beautiful day today.
479
00:31:03,444 --> 00:31:07,698
Beautiful and safe and sunny.
480
00:31:07,866 --> 00:31:13,287
The sun's just a burning ball of fire that
could plunge from the sky at any time.
481
00:31:18,626 --> 00:31:20,335
Maybe we should just let him come.
482
00:31:20,503 --> 00:31:23,046
No way, I'm not having
that nutcase at my wedding.
483
00:31:23,214 --> 00:31:25,841
Can you imagine the service?
"Do you, Veronica...
484
00:31:26,009 --> 00:31:28,552
Fucking bitch! ...Fisher, take this man...
485
00:31:29,971 --> 00:31:31,972
Fucks dick! ...Kevin Ball?"
486
00:31:32,140 --> 00:31:33,265
Uh-uh, no.
487
00:31:33,433 --> 00:31:34,766
I'm taking him to prison
where he belongs...
488
00:31:34,934 --> 00:31:36,727
...if I gotta drag his ass
back there myself.
489
00:31:36,895 --> 00:31:39,813
Always happens
when he's off his meds.
490
00:31:40,815 --> 00:31:44,610
- Give me your dress so I can steam it.
- Behind the door.
491
00:31:48,156 --> 00:31:51,325
- Nope.
- The bathroom door.
492
00:31:51,826 --> 00:31:53,994
It's a real pretty dress, Roni.
493
00:31:55,997 --> 00:31:58,290
It'll burn nicely with all this taffeta.
494
00:32:00,126 --> 00:32:01,627
Oh, Jesus.
495
00:32:01,794 --> 00:32:03,128
You send me back to jail...
496
00:32:03,296 --> 00:32:06,465
...this dress goes up,
this house goes up, we all go up!
497
00:32:07,967 --> 00:32:09,635
Marty?
498
00:32:09,802 --> 00:32:11,637
Marty, open the door.
499
00:32:11,804 --> 00:32:13,639
Open the goddamn door.
500
00:32:13,806 --> 00:32:16,308
You're not getting married without me.
501
00:32:17,143 --> 00:32:19,019
Cock fuck!
502
00:32:21,689 --> 00:32:25,525
He's not doing anything.
Just sitting in there. Lighting a lighter.
503
00:32:25,693 --> 00:32:28,612
Oh, my God, this is what he did
at Granddaddy's funeral.
504
00:32:28,821 --> 00:32:31,239
- Gutted half the hospice.
- We should call the cops.
505
00:32:31,407 --> 00:32:34,201
If the house goes up
we're not gonna get him out.
506
00:32:34,369 --> 00:32:35,869
Call the cops on my own brother?
507
00:32:36,037 --> 00:32:38,956
It's always like this.
Nobody can be the center of attention.
508
00:32:39,123 --> 00:32:42,042
It's always gotta be about him.
You should be in a nuthouse!
509
00:32:42,210 --> 00:32:45,253
- What's going on?
- Veronica's brother is threatening...
510
00:32:45,421 --> 00:32:47,464
...to burn the place down.
- Cool.
511
00:32:47,632 --> 00:32:52,135
He's saying that he's gonna light the
dress and the shit-sack house on fire.
512
00:32:52,345 --> 00:32:54,221
What's a shit-sack?
513
00:32:54,389 --> 00:32:59,059
All I wanted was to own my own home.
Maybe some small kitchen appliances.
514
00:32:59,227 --> 00:33:01,395
For you, for me. For our home.
515
00:33:01,562 --> 00:33:04,940
- Maybe some kids someday.
- I thought you didn't want any kids.
516
00:33:05,108 --> 00:33:07,401
- Based on what?
- Saying how much you hate them.
517
00:33:07,568 --> 00:33:09,236
Uh, yeah, other people's.
518
00:33:09,404 --> 00:33:12,114
But I might not mind
having a baby Kev running round.
519
00:33:12,281 --> 00:33:13,949
A little tomorrow person?
520
00:33:14,909 --> 00:33:15,951
What?
521
00:33:16,119 --> 00:33:19,246
That's what I call little mixed-race
babies. Tomorrow people.
522
00:33:19,414 --> 00:33:21,915
Little people of tomorrow.
523
00:33:23,084 --> 00:33:24,918
What are we gonna do?
524
00:33:25,086 --> 00:33:27,754
- Maybe we should just call it off.
- No! Not a chance.
525
00:33:27,922 --> 00:33:29,923
Baby, listen, this is our time.
526
00:33:30,091 --> 00:33:33,802
We're gonna get fake married,
and nothing's gonna stop us.
527
00:33:37,890 --> 00:33:41,977
- Tomorrow people?
- Tomorrow people.
528
00:33:46,941 --> 00:33:49,109
Can you sign in for me
at detention today?
529
00:33:49,277 --> 00:33:51,486
Mrs. Pinder won't notice,
she's almost blind.
530
00:33:51,654 --> 00:33:53,030
You ditching?
531
00:33:53,197 --> 00:33:55,532
Kash has something planned.
532
00:33:55,700 --> 00:33:57,451
I thought that was last night.
533
00:33:57,618 --> 00:34:00,662
Was supposed to be,
but, uh, he took me to his place...
534
00:34:00,830 --> 00:34:02,456
...and it sort of freaked me out.
535
00:34:02,623 --> 00:34:07,294
I mean, I always knew he had a wife
and a life and everything, but seeing it...
536
00:34:07,462 --> 00:34:08,837
...and smelling it...
537
00:34:09,005 --> 00:34:11,798
I mean, his life actually has an odor.
538
00:34:16,387 --> 00:34:17,846
What was that for?
539
00:34:18,014 --> 00:34:20,849
I just felt like kissing my boyfriend.
540
00:34:21,559 --> 00:34:24,686
Have fun fucking Kash.
541
00:34:37,450 --> 00:34:39,367
Remember when we were little?
542
00:34:39,535 --> 00:34:43,121
And you'd always tag along with me
wherever I went?
543
00:34:43,873 --> 00:34:46,541
I always looked after you,
didn't I, Marty?
544
00:34:47,502 --> 00:34:49,461
And you know why?
545
00:34:49,962 --> 00:34:52,005
Because I'm your big little sister.
546
00:34:52,173 --> 00:34:55,759
And I didn't want you to get in trouble,
because I love you.
547
00:34:56,594 --> 00:34:58,678
That's why I want you
to go back to prison.
548
00:35:01,933 --> 00:35:03,600
Do you know what?
549
00:35:04,143 --> 00:35:07,354
I've been thinking about my wedding,
and you know something?
550
00:35:07,522 --> 00:35:09,356
You were right.
551
00:35:09,941 --> 00:35:13,235
Because my wedding day
wouldn't be my wedding day...
552
00:35:13,402 --> 00:35:15,654
...without my little big brother there.
553
00:35:20,076 --> 00:35:24,371
In fact, I'd like you to be
the one to give me away.
554
00:35:26,415 --> 00:35:27,958
Marty?
555
00:35:35,174 --> 00:35:38,009
- You mean it?
- Cross my heart.
556
00:35:38,177 --> 00:35:39,928
Come here, you little nut.
557
00:35:45,643 --> 00:35:49,312
Bitches! You bitches lied to me.
558
00:35:50,273 --> 00:35:53,733
I'm gonna burn down your...
Cock-sucking, cock-fucking...
559
00:36:08,082 --> 00:36:10,250
Damn. That shit does dry fast.
560
00:36:22,430 --> 00:36:23,847
Lip. My boy.
561
00:36:24,015 --> 00:36:28,101
- My oldest boy.
- Yeah, here to pick up Karen.
562
00:36:28,311 --> 00:36:32,022
- What's with the vest?
- Sheils made it.
563
00:36:33,900 --> 00:36:35,692
Wow. Look at you.
564
00:36:35,860 --> 00:36:37,611
- You look beautiful.
- Thanks.
565
00:36:37,778 --> 00:36:39,029
- Hi, Lip.
- Hi.
566
00:36:39,197 --> 00:36:40,989
Does my head look bigger?
567
00:36:42,116 --> 00:36:43,158
Um...
568
00:36:43,326 --> 00:36:46,995
- I don't think it can get any bigger, Dad.
- I have to keep an eye on it.
569
00:36:47,163 --> 00:36:50,290
- Watch for memory loss and vomit.
- More so than usual?
570
00:36:50,458 --> 00:36:51,833
Know what?
571
00:36:52,001 --> 00:36:54,377
- I have a second chance at life.
- Mm-hm.
572
00:36:54,545 --> 00:36:58,048
I'm not gonna surround myself
with negative energy.
573
00:36:58,216 --> 00:37:02,302
How about you just show up at this
wedding and do what you do best:
574
00:37:02,470 --> 00:37:04,763
Drink free booze and look happy.
575
00:37:04,972 --> 00:37:07,641
- Yes?
- Heh.
576
00:37:07,808 --> 00:37:11,102
All right, Frank. I am ready.
577
00:37:11,270 --> 00:37:12,354
You're coming, Mom?
578
00:37:12,521 --> 00:37:13,855
She's not going anywhere.
579
00:37:14,023 --> 00:37:15,232
Yes, I'm coming.
580
00:37:15,399 --> 00:37:19,527
I've got my purse, and my gift,
and my gloves.
581
00:37:19,695 --> 00:37:23,073
And my selective serotonin
re-uptake inhibitor.
582
00:37:23,241 --> 00:37:25,909
And my monoamine oxidase inhibitor.
583
00:37:26,077 --> 00:37:29,371
And I have my anti-anxiety
disco biscuits.
584
00:37:29,538 --> 00:37:34,751
And I am ready to go.
I am really ready.
585
00:37:52,353 --> 00:37:54,980
I'll just get you a piece of cake, Mom.
586
00:38:04,532 --> 00:38:06,533
That would just be...
587
00:38:07,660 --> 00:38:09,035
...wonderful, sweetheart.
588
00:38:09,203 --> 00:38:12,330
There's just so much
I've gotta get done here.
589
00:38:26,387 --> 00:38:28,221
Ah, that bitch.
590
00:38:28,389 --> 00:38:32,225
What kind of cock-suck
does this to her brother?
591
00:38:44,613 --> 00:38:47,115
May daily problems
never cause you undue anxiety...
592
00:38:47,283 --> 00:38:50,827
...nor the desire for earthly
possessions dominate your lives.
593
00:38:51,495 --> 00:38:55,332
But may your hearts' first desire
be always the good things...
594
00:38:55,499 --> 00:38:57,917
...waiting for you in the life of heaven.
595
00:38:58,085 --> 00:39:00,253
- Amen.
- Amen!
596
00:39:00,421 --> 00:39:02,756
- You may kiss the bride.
- Woo-hoo!
597
00:39:10,806 --> 00:39:12,015
Oh, yes!
598
00:39:12,266 --> 00:39:13,808
Yay!
599
00:39:14,101 --> 00:39:16,770
It's on tonight
Ride that thing like a motorbike
600
00:39:16,937 --> 00:39:18,438
Get it out!
601
00:39:18,606 --> 00:39:19,939
We could get it on the dance floor
602
00:39:24,779 --> 00:39:25,779
Yeah!
603
00:39:28,824 --> 00:39:30,450
What's going on?
604
00:39:30,618 --> 00:39:31,868
Get some, Father!
605
00:39:39,043 --> 00:39:41,169
Come on, Dad, work it.
606
00:39:41,962 --> 00:39:43,963
Go Liam! Go Liam! Go Liam!
607
00:39:44,548 --> 00:39:46,591
Say what you gotta say
608
00:39:46,759 --> 00:39:49,344
Take it down, take it down.
609
00:39:49,804 --> 00:39:54,307
Take me away
Say what you gotta say
610
00:39:57,770 --> 00:39:59,813
Oh!
611
00:40:00,815 --> 00:40:03,316
If I was out of your reach
Would you jump for it
612
00:40:05,986 --> 00:40:09,489
If I was out of your reach
Would you jump for it
613
00:40:11,158 --> 00:40:14,160
Uh... Folks, let's face facts.
614
00:40:14,328 --> 00:40:18,039
When it comes to good things,
most of them come in pairs.
615
00:40:18,207 --> 00:40:22,919
Like your favorite jeans,
new socks, and Kevin and Veronica.
616
00:40:23,087 --> 00:40:24,129
Aw.
617
00:40:24,296 --> 00:40:27,507
And as it turns out,
most people's testicles.
618
00:40:27,675 --> 00:40:31,553
So here's to the happy couple.
619
00:40:31,720 --> 00:40:35,515
Kevin, Veronica,
may you always only have...
620
00:40:35,683 --> 00:40:39,144
...two testicles between you.
L'chaim!
621
00:40:43,858 --> 00:40:46,693
Oh. Oh, sweetheart.
622
00:40:46,861 --> 00:40:50,363
May the good Lord watch over you
in your new home.
623
00:40:50,531 --> 00:40:54,033
- Oh, thank you, Momma.
- Thank you.
624
00:40:54,994 --> 00:40:58,580
Say it like you mean it, boy
Say it like you want it
625
00:40:58,747 --> 00:41:01,708
Five hundred dollars?
Are you fucking kidding me?
626
00:41:05,171 --> 00:41:07,589
We're getting a Barbie house, baby.
627
00:41:09,049 --> 00:41:12,719
Maybe you're making yourself
too available?
628
00:41:12,887 --> 00:41:13,928
You think?
629
00:41:14,096 --> 00:41:16,931
Hey, lady friend,
where the hell is my cake?
630
00:41:17,099 --> 00:41:20,602
Steve is supposed to be here
with the damn thing.
631
00:41:20,769 --> 00:41:22,812
That's the trouble with the exciting ones.
632
00:41:22,980 --> 00:41:25,815
The unpredictability
is what makes them so exciting.
633
00:41:25,983 --> 00:41:29,736
But it's also what makes
them so damned unpredictable.
634
00:41:29,904 --> 00:41:33,448
He may not be Steve, but he's here.
635
00:41:38,370 --> 00:41:40,497
- Hi.
- Hi.
636
00:41:40,664 --> 00:41:42,582
Do you wanna dance?
637
00:41:42,750 --> 00:41:46,336
- The bible is the word of God.
- How can it be the word of God...
638
00:41:46,504 --> 00:41:49,923
...if it was re-written by King James?
- Passed down from generation...
639
00:41:50,090 --> 00:41:52,926
...to generation!
- Uh-uh-uh! It doesn't make any sense!
640
00:41:53,093 --> 00:41:57,764
Aw. This was really a perfect day.
641
00:41:57,932 --> 00:42:01,434
I only wish little Marty
could have been here.
642
00:42:32,967 --> 00:42:35,802
You're late, Dr. Sherman.
643
00:42:44,520 --> 00:42:46,229
I'm...
644
00:42:47,731 --> 00:42:49,732
I can't...
645
00:42:51,193 --> 00:42:55,905
Okay, Gallaghers, you're the only
family I got, so let's put this on film.
646
00:42:59,034 --> 00:43:00,243
- Wait. Wait.
- Is it on?
647
00:43:00,452 --> 00:43:03,329
- It's on, it's on. Wait.
- Did it go?
648
00:43:04,123 --> 00:43:05,498
Oh.
649
00:43:06,542 --> 00:43:08,918
Again, set it up again. Here we go.
Ready?
650
00:43:09,086 --> 00:43:10,253
- Okay.
- Let's go.
651
00:43:13,424 --> 00:43:15,717
- Wait, where's Lip?
- Where...? Oh.
652
00:43:15,968 --> 00:43:17,510
Yeah.
653
00:43:17,678 --> 00:43:19,554
Oh, yeah.
654
00:43:19,722 --> 00:43:22,265
Oh, yeah. Give it to me. Oh, yeah.
655
00:43:23,392 --> 00:43:26,603
Oh, yeah. Yeah!
Oh, yeah! Give it to me!
656
00:43:26,770 --> 00:43:28,354
- Want me to give it to you?
- Yes.
657
00:43:29,023 --> 00:43:31,232
Yeah, she said
she wants you to give it to her.
658
00:43:31,400 --> 00:43:34,402
So just give it to her already! Okay?
659
00:43:34,570 --> 00:43:36,029
Cock and balls!
660
00:43:57,551 --> 00:44:00,887
It really was like a fairy tale.
661
00:44:06,393 --> 00:44:08,811
And she was a real princess.
662
00:44:10,439 --> 00:44:12,273
Yeah, well, she's dead now.
663
00:44:12,441 --> 00:44:15,276
How's that for happily ever after?
664
00:44:21,075 --> 00:44:22,116
Asshole.
52397
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