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1
00:00:02,836 --> 00:00:06,840
Shh. Aw, there, there.
2
00:00:07,340 --> 00:00:10,342
Isn't he just so cute...
3
00:00:10,343 --> 00:00:11,343
That you want to...
4
00:00:11,344 --> 00:00:15,347
Whoops!
Crypt keeper here, kiddies.
5
00:00:15,348 --> 00:00:17,850
And speaking of kiddies,
6
00:00:17,851 --> 00:00:20,853
tonight's sickening saga
should be subtitled
7
00:00:20,854 --> 00:00:22,855
a tale from the crib.
8
00:00:22,856 --> 00:00:24,356
Yes, fear fans,
9
00:00:24,357 --> 00:00:27,860
I've got a real nursery crime
for you this time.
10
00:00:27,861 --> 00:00:30,362
It's all about
the humble beginnings
11
00:00:30,363 --> 00:00:32,866
of my favorite
horror hero.
12
00:00:33,366 --> 00:00:34,868
So call the babysitter
13
00:00:35,368 --> 00:00:37,369
and break out
the barf bags
14
00:00:37,370 --> 00:00:39,372
as I narrate
a nauseating novella
15
00:00:39,873 --> 00:00:42,875
with a very special place
in my heart.
16
00:00:42,876 --> 00:00:47,880
I affectionately call this one
lower berth.
17
00:00:47,881 --> 00:00:47,881
I affectionately call this one
lower berth.
18
00:01:01,394 --> 00:01:02,895
Guess your weight!
19
00:01:02,896 --> 00:01:04,397
Guess your weight!
20
00:01:12,906 --> 00:01:15,407
Ladies and gentlemen,
21
00:01:15,408 --> 00:01:17,910
boys and girls,
22
00:01:17,911 --> 00:01:21,413
step right up and be prepared
to gasp, to swoon,
23
00:01:21,414 --> 00:01:23,415
to feast your disbelieving eyes
24
00:01:23,416 --> 00:01:26,919
on the most astounding array
of freaks and oddities
25
00:01:26,920 --> 00:01:29,922
ever gathered together
under one tent!
26
00:01:29,923 --> 00:01:33,425
See the piteous products
of god's twisted sense of humor.
27
00:01:33,426 --> 00:01:37,263
View with your very eyes
the alarming consequences
28
00:01:37,764 --> 00:01:40,066
of nature's most
heinous miscalculations.
29
00:01:40,567 --> 00:01:43,068
Witness, if you dare,
30
00:01:43,069 --> 00:01:46,572
the results of the most
unnatural inbreeding.
31
00:01:46,573 --> 00:01:48,941
Man or monster?
Human or horror?
32
00:01:48,942 --> 00:01:51,326
You be the judge and jury.
33
00:01:51,327 --> 00:01:53,745
See Fanny the fat lady,
34
00:01:53,746 --> 00:01:57,249
over 45o pounds
of bovine beauty.
35
00:01:57,250 --> 00:01:58,750
Pay a visit to the littles...
36
00:01:58,751 --> 00:02:02,254
A family so small,
they live in a shoe box.
37
00:02:02,255 --> 00:02:05,758
Witness the stupefying
skull face,
38
00:02:06,259 --> 00:02:08,261
a living human skeleton.
39
00:02:08,761 --> 00:02:10,629
And finally,
our star attraction,
40
00:02:10,630 --> 00:02:12,548
the amazing Enoch!
41
00:02:12,549 --> 00:02:16,051
A display so bizarre,
you have to see it
42
00:02:16,052 --> 00:02:18,972
with your very selfsame eyes
to believe it.
43
00:02:19,472 --> 00:02:20,974
So, ladies and gentlemen,
boys and girls,
44
00:02:21,474 --> 00:02:22,976
step right up.
Right this way.
45
00:02:23,476 --> 00:02:24,476
For one thin dime,
46
00:02:24,477 --> 00:02:25,477
a tenth part of a dollar,
47
00:02:25,478 --> 00:02:28,480
you may avail yourself of
this fantastic exhibit!
48
00:02:28,481 --> 00:02:29,982
Right this way, sir!
49
00:02:29,983 --> 00:02:31,450
Watch your step.
50
00:02:31,451 --> 00:02:33,452
Don't rush. There'll be
plenty of room for all!
51
00:02:33,453 --> 00:02:35,454
And we shall have
repeated showings
52
00:02:35,455 --> 00:02:37,956
until every man,
woman, and child
53
00:02:37,957 --> 00:02:39,324
can avail themselves
54
00:02:39,325 --> 00:02:42,044
of this interesting and
educational exhibit.
55
00:02:42,045 --> 00:02:43,545
Step lightly, sir.
That's the idea.
56
00:02:43,546 --> 00:02:45,964
Feeley's fantastic
fairway of freaks.
57
00:02:45,965 --> 00:02:47,967
Show time
now beginning!
58
00:02:48,418 --> 00:02:49,835
Enoch!
59
00:02:49,836 --> 00:02:52,137
Enoch!
60
00:02:52,138 --> 00:02:56,058
What do you think
you're doing? Huh?
61
00:02:56,059 --> 00:02:58,060
You're a naughty boy!
62
00:02:58,061 --> 00:02:59,061
You hear me?
Naughty!
63
00:02:59,062 --> 00:03:03,182
Come on. Get up.
Come on! Come on!
64
00:03:03,183 --> 00:03:08,605
Introducing
Fanny the fat lady!
65
00:03:12,108 --> 00:03:15,611
Come on.
66
00:03:15,612 --> 00:03:17,112
Now, get in there.
67
00:03:17,113 --> 00:03:19,114
Go on!
68
00:03:19,115 --> 00:03:19,115
Go on!
69
00:03:23,286 --> 00:03:24,286
Stay there, you hear?
70
00:03:24,287 --> 00:03:29,425
Ladies and gentlemen,
meet the littles.
71
00:03:29,926 --> 00:03:31,793
Oh!
72
00:03:31,794 --> 00:03:33,845
Aw!
73
00:03:33,846 --> 00:03:35,264
How'd you
get out of there?
74
00:03:35,265 --> 00:03:36,765
Huh? Tell me.
75
00:03:36,766 --> 00:03:40,769
And finally, ladies and
gentlemen, the star attraction
76
00:03:40,770 --> 00:03:43,772
at feeley's fantastic
fairway of freaks...
77
00:03:43,773 --> 00:03:46,775
The most alarming
and unusual oddity
78
00:03:46,776 --> 00:03:51,029
ever to be put on display
anywhere, anytime, anyplace.
79
00:03:51,030 --> 00:03:52,031
Now, no more!
80
00:03:52,532 --> 00:03:52,532
Now, no more!
81
00:03:57,537 --> 00:03:59,538
Ladies and gentlemen,
82
00:03:59,539 --> 00:04:01,039
boys and girls,
83
00:04:01,040 --> 00:04:04,042
look upon Enoch...
84
00:04:04,043 --> 00:04:07,046
The 2-faced man!
85
00:04:08,548 --> 00:04:10,048
I can't see!
86
00:04:10,049 --> 00:04:11,550
Oh!
87
00:04:11,551 --> 00:04:11,551
Oh!
88
00:04:30,737 --> 00:04:32,187
How many
times, sickles?
89
00:04:32,188 --> 00:04:34,439
How many times do I
have to tell you
90
00:04:34,440 --> 00:04:37,326
to get him in his cage
before show time?
91
00:04:37,327 --> 00:04:39,329
Yes, sir, Mr. feeley.
92
00:04:39,829 --> 00:04:41,330
I don't know how
he gets out.
93
00:04:41,331 --> 00:04:43,332
It won't
happen again.
94
00:04:43,333 --> 00:04:45,834
Of that you may be sure, Mr.
Sickles.
95
00:04:45,835 --> 00:04:48,837
Because the next
time it does happen,
96
00:04:48,838 --> 00:04:52,341
then I shall be happy
to discuss with you
97
00:04:52,342 --> 00:04:56,128
the retirement of your
most amazing Enoch.
98
00:04:56,129 --> 00:04:59,131
Now, wait a minute,
Mr. feeley.
99
00:04:59,132 --> 00:05:01,133
Without me and Enoch,
100
00:05:01,134 --> 00:05:03,635
you're no different than
any other 2-bit sideshow.
101
00:05:03,636 --> 00:05:06,638
He's the only thing
you got that's different.
102
00:05:06,639 --> 00:05:09,141
Enoch is special.
103
00:05:09,142 --> 00:05:12,144
Enoch is dying.
104
00:05:12,145 --> 00:05:16,448
Did you really think you could
bribe the company doctor
105
00:05:16,449 --> 00:05:17,899
to keep it from me?
106
00:05:17,900 --> 00:05:20,902
Well, apparently
your freak
107
00:05:20,903 --> 00:05:24,906
isn't the only one
with 2 faces, is he?
108
00:05:24,907 --> 00:05:24,907
Isn't the only one
with 2 faces, is he?
109
00:05:28,411 --> 00:05:32,914
No, sickles, your meal
ticket's godforsaken life
110
00:05:32,915 --> 00:05:35,418
is winding toward
a merciful end,
111
00:05:35,918 --> 00:05:39,838
so please don't tell me
how much I need you!
112
00:05:39,839 --> 00:05:43,141
We'll play it out as
long as it takes...
113
00:05:43,142 --> 00:05:44,643
A month, a week,
114
00:05:44,644 --> 00:05:48,146
but as long
as you own him,
115
00:05:48,147 --> 00:05:50,148
then I own you,
116
00:05:50,149 --> 00:05:54,019
and we do things
my way!
117
00:05:54,020 --> 00:05:56,739
Understand,
Mr. sickles?
118
00:05:57,240 --> 00:05:57,240
Understand,
Mr. sickles?
119
00:06:14,957 --> 00:06:18,177
You've been a very
naughty boy, Enoch.
120
00:06:19,095 --> 00:06:20,095
You hear me?
121
00:06:20,096 --> 00:06:22,098
Naughty boy!
122
00:06:23,099 --> 00:06:24,599
Naughty!
123
00:06:24,600 --> 00:06:25,601
Naughty!
124
00:06:39,315 --> 00:06:41,317
Enoch's special.
125
00:06:51,494 --> 00:06:54,463
I see you prefer
a lower berth.
126
00:06:54,464 --> 00:06:55,882
Who are you?
How'd you get in here?
127
00:06:56,382 --> 00:06:57,382
The door,
Mr. sickles.
128
00:06:57,383 --> 00:06:59,718
Call me
unconventional.
129
00:06:59,719 --> 00:07:02,170
How about I call
a policeman?
130
00:07:02,171 --> 00:07:04,674
Oh, I don't think
you want to do that.
131
00:07:05,174 --> 00:07:05,675
Oh, no? Why not?
132
00:07:06,175 --> 00:07:10,095
Because, Mr. sickles,
I'm your salvation.
133
00:07:10,096 --> 00:07:12,898
That's why.
134
00:07:12,899 --> 00:07:16,818
Dr. Zachary kling,
at your service.
135
00:07:16,819 --> 00:07:20,239
Please. Please.
136
00:07:20,740 --> 00:07:24,242
Don't let me interrupt
your supper.
137
00:07:24,243 --> 00:07:24,243
Don't let me interrupt
your supper.
138
00:07:27,530 --> 00:07:28,530
"At your service,"
you say.
139
00:07:28,531 --> 00:07:30,532
What kind of service
may that be?
140
00:07:30,533 --> 00:07:33,034
Well, let's not be
coy, Mr. sickles.
141
00:07:33,035 --> 00:07:35,537
I overheard your, shall we say,
142
00:07:35,538 --> 00:07:37,456
altercation
with the owner.
143
00:07:37,457 --> 00:07:39,758
It seems your days
here may be numbered.
144
00:07:39,759 --> 00:07:41,761
Do correct me
if I'm wrong.
145
00:07:42,261 --> 00:07:43,262
Well,
what of it?
146
00:07:43,763 --> 00:07:45,681
Well, it just so
happens,
147
00:07:46,182 --> 00:07:47,183
I have recently made
an acquisition...
148
00:07:47,683 --> 00:07:51,386
An acquisition from which
we both might benefit,
149
00:07:51,387 --> 00:07:52,805
if you take
my meaning.
150
00:07:53,272 --> 00:07:53,272
If you take
my meaning.
151
00:07:54,524 --> 00:07:56,942
What kind of
an acquisition?
152
00:07:56,943 --> 00:07:57,860
Ha ha ha!
153
00:07:57,861 --> 00:07:59,896
Are you a card player, Mr.
Sickles?
154
00:08:00,396 --> 00:08:02,647
Now and again.
155
00:08:02,648 --> 00:08:05,868
Myself, I must confess
to a certain,
156
00:08:06,285 --> 00:08:10,990
shall we say, zealousy
for games of chance.
157
00:08:11,424 --> 00:08:16,895
I was playing a gentlemen in St.
Louis recently...
158
00:08:16,896 --> 00:08:21,900
As it happens, a gentlemen
of distinction on 2 counts...
159
00:08:21,901 --> 00:08:24,403
One, he was an
archeologist by trade.
160
00:08:24,904 --> 00:08:27,906
And secondly, he couldn't
play poker for shit.
161
00:08:27,907 --> 00:08:27,907
And secondly, he couldn't
play poker for shit.
162
00:08:29,242 --> 00:08:31,210
When it became clear
that this gentlemen
163
00:08:31,711 --> 00:08:33,578
was going to owe me quite
a large sum of money,
164
00:08:33,579 --> 00:08:35,881
not strictly in
his possession,
165
00:08:35,882 --> 00:08:38,384
it became eminently clear
that something of equal worth
166
00:08:38,801 --> 00:08:41,304
would have to be
bartered as collateral.
167
00:08:41,804 --> 00:08:41,804
Would have to be
bartered as collateral.
168
00:08:50,563 --> 00:08:53,815
Her name is mirana,
Mr. sickles...
169
00:08:53,816 --> 00:08:57,519
Though I prefer
myrna, don't you?
170
00:08:57,520 --> 00:09:00,522
An Egyptian slave girl,
it was explained to me,
171
00:09:00,523 --> 00:09:02,023
buried alive at 16
172
00:09:02,024 --> 00:09:04,776
for repelling the
pharaoh's advances.
173
00:09:04,777 --> 00:09:06,578
Rather a high price for
playing hard to get,
174
00:09:06,579 --> 00:09:07,662
wouldn't you say?
175
00:09:07,663 --> 00:09:07,663
Wouldn't you say?
176
00:09:09,165 --> 00:09:11,166
Never able to love.
177
00:09:11,167 --> 00:09:13,168
Never able
to bear children.
178
00:09:13,169 --> 00:09:15,870
Never able to have
a normal life.
179
00:09:15,871 --> 00:09:18,758
It's sad, really.
180
00:09:19,258 --> 00:09:21,126
She's yours
for a 60-40 split.
181
00:09:21,127 --> 00:09:23,128
Do we have a deal
or not?
182
00:09:23,129 --> 00:09:24,596
What's the catch?
183
00:09:24,597 --> 00:09:26,598
I'm afraid I don't
follow you.
184
00:09:26,599 --> 00:09:30,051
This is a business of
playing people for suckers.
185
00:09:30,052 --> 00:09:31,553
Don't play me for one.
186
00:09:31,554 --> 00:09:33,722
What do you
need me for?
187
00:09:33,723 --> 00:09:36,691
Why don't you
go straight to feeley?
188
00:09:36,692 --> 00:09:40,028
Mr. sickles, as I said,
I'm a gambling man.
189
00:09:40,029 --> 00:09:42,564
I play to win, and winners
tend to make enemies,
190
00:09:42,565 --> 00:09:44,032
if you take
my meaning.
191
00:09:44,033 --> 00:09:46,451
In all candor,
I need to keep
192
00:09:46,452 --> 00:09:47,953
a low profile
for a while.
193
00:09:47,954 --> 00:09:49,955
The less official
my connection
194
00:09:49,956 --> 00:09:51,957
with the sideshow,
the better.
195
00:09:51,958 --> 00:09:51,958
With the sideshow,
the better.
196
00:09:53,960 --> 00:09:54,877
What about the jewels?
197
00:09:54,878 --> 00:09:57,879
Oh, completely worthless, Mr.
Sickles.
198
00:09:57,880 --> 00:09:58,381
A mere prop.
199
00:09:58,881 --> 00:09:58,881
A mere prop.
200
00:10:01,300 --> 00:10:04,219
Look.
201
00:10:04,220 --> 00:10:07,589
Consider yourself my
agent, if you like.
202
00:10:07,590 --> 00:10:10,892
I think a 40% commission
is more than equitable.
203
00:10:10,893 --> 00:10:12,394
I mean, after all,
204
00:10:12,395 --> 00:10:14,846
considering your
present situation.
205
00:10:14,847 --> 00:10:14,847
Considering your
present situation.
206
00:10:23,356 --> 00:10:25,357
Ha ha! Good.
207
00:10:25,358 --> 00:10:27,660
Let's drink to it,
shall we?
208
00:10:28,160 --> 00:10:30,662
Don't mind if I do.
209
00:10:30,663 --> 00:10:30,663
Don't mind if I do.
210
00:10:44,176 --> 00:10:46,177
Step right up,
ladies and gentlemen,
211
00:10:46,178 --> 00:10:47,429
boys and girls,
212
00:10:47,430 --> 00:10:49,714
and avail yourself
of this interesting exhibit!
213
00:10:49,715 --> 00:10:52,100
That's the idea.
Hurry along, lads.
214
00:10:52,101 --> 00:10:53,101
Here we are, sir.
215
00:10:53,102 --> 00:10:55,103
That's the idea. Mm-hmm.
216
00:10:55,104 --> 00:10:57,106
Myrna the mummy!
217
00:10:57,606 --> 00:10:57,606
Myrna the mummy!
218
00:10:59,608 --> 00:11:01,776
Ooh!
Oh!
219
00:11:01,777 --> 00:11:01,777
Ooh!
Oh!
220
00:11:03,612 --> 00:11:05,613
And, we will have
further showings
221
00:11:05,614 --> 00:11:06,614
to accommodate
you all.
222
00:11:06,615 --> 00:11:07,982
Yes. Step right in,
sir.
223
00:11:07,983 --> 00:11:09,284
That's the idea.
224
00:11:09,285 --> 00:11:11,653
Feeley's fantastic
fairway of freaks.
225
00:11:11,654 --> 00:11:13,988
Show time
now beginning!
226
00:11:13,989 --> 00:11:15,490
Oh!
227
00:11:15,491 --> 00:11:15,491
Oh!
228
00:11:20,996 --> 00:11:21,996
Here's...
229
00:11:21,997 --> 00:11:23,998
Oh!
230
00:11:23,999 --> 00:11:23,999
Oh!
231
00:11:27,420 --> 00:11:28,837
Here's myrna.
232
00:11:28,838 --> 00:11:30,255
Myrna!
233
00:11:30,256 --> 00:11:30,673
Myrna!
234
00:11:34,226 --> 00:11:36,429
Come on!
Hurry!
235
00:11:36,929 --> 00:11:37,929
I'm going
as fast as I can.
236
00:11:37,930 --> 00:11:40,815
Stand clear of
the fire eater.
237
00:11:40,816 --> 00:11:41,767
Oh!
238
00:11:41,767 --> 00:11:41,767
Oh!
239
00:12:33,285 --> 00:12:34,285
Hey!
240
00:12:34,286 --> 00:12:34,286
Hey!
241
00:12:57,810 --> 00:12:59,811
Ayah.
242
00:12:59,812 --> 00:12:59,812
Ayah.
243
00:13:08,821 --> 00:13:10,188
Whee!
244
00:13:10,189 --> 00:13:12,607
Ahh.
245
00:13:12,608 --> 00:13:12,608
Ahh.
246
00:13:16,445 --> 00:13:17,445
Ha ha.
247
00:13:17,446 --> 00:13:17,446
Ha ha.
248
00:13:24,253 --> 00:13:26,755
Ha ha!
249
00:13:27,706 --> 00:13:29,457
Elizabeth!
250
00:13:29,458 --> 00:13:31,092
Come here.
251
00:13:31,093 --> 00:13:32,093
Come here!
252
00:13:32,094 --> 00:13:32,094
Come here!
253
00:13:34,597 --> 00:13:35,598
Here.
254
00:13:36,098 --> 00:13:36,098
Here.
255
00:13:38,601 --> 00:13:42,104
Elizabeth,
get over here now!
256
00:13:42,605 --> 00:13:44,606
Just what do you think
you're doing, young lady?
257
00:13:44,607 --> 00:13:46,107
Now, you stay away
from that thing.
258
00:13:46,108 --> 00:13:46,108
Now, you stay away
from that thing.
259
00:13:59,655 --> 00:14:02,991
Enoch, you naughty boy.
260
00:14:02,992 --> 00:14:05,326
Naughty!
261
00:14:05,327 --> 00:14:07,796
What's that
you got there?
262
00:14:08,297 --> 00:14:09,797
Give it to me.
263
00:14:09,798 --> 00:14:11,800
I said give it to me!
264
00:14:12,301 --> 00:14:12,801
Give it...
265
00:14:13,302 --> 00:14:13,302
Give it...
266
00:14:27,182 --> 00:14:28,900
Well, I'll be
blown to hell.
267
00:14:28,901 --> 00:14:32,403
You're carrying a torch
for that old bag of bones,
268
00:14:32,404 --> 00:14:34,606
aren't you?
269
00:14:34,607 --> 00:14:38,443
You sick, pathetic...
270
00:14:38,444 --> 00:14:39,945
It's a family you want,
271
00:14:40,446 --> 00:14:42,697
is it, hmm?
272
00:14:42,698 --> 00:14:44,582
Is that it?
273
00:14:44,583 --> 00:14:47,335
A normal life.
274
00:14:47,336 --> 00:14:49,871
Ha ha ha!
275
00:14:49,872 --> 00:14:51,372
A normal life!
276
00:14:51,373 --> 00:14:52,374
Ha ha ha!
277
00:14:52,875 --> 00:14:53,875
A family!
278
00:14:53,876 --> 00:14:55,126
Ha ha ha!
279
00:14:55,127 --> 00:14:56,461
Ha ha ha...
280
00:14:56,462 --> 00:14:56,462
Ha ha ha...
281
00:15:07,773 --> 00:15:11,860
"priceless Egyptian
mummy stolen."
282
00:15:12,278 --> 00:15:12,278
"Priceless Egyptian
mummy stolen."
283
00:15:14,196 --> 00:15:16,564
Look at that! Look at that!
Ain't that a show?
284
00:15:16,565 --> 00:15:17,565
Hey, I wanna
talk to you.
285
00:15:17,566 --> 00:15:20,068
One should never argue
with lady luck,
286
00:15:20,069 --> 00:15:22,570
now, should one?
287
00:15:22,571 --> 00:15:24,073
We need to talk, doctor.
288
00:15:24,573 --> 00:15:26,574
Just a few more hands,
Mr. sickles.
289
00:15:26,575 --> 00:15:27,076
Just a few more hands,
Mr. sickles.
290
00:15:27,826 --> 00:15:29,827
Now!
291
00:15:29,828 --> 00:15:29,828
Now!
292
00:15:34,166 --> 00:15:36,167
Uh...
293
00:15:36,168 --> 00:15:38,169
Deal me out,
gentlemen.
294
00:15:38,170 --> 00:15:38,170
Deal me out,
gentlemen.
295
00:15:48,180 --> 00:15:49,180
Here.
296
00:15:49,181 --> 00:15:50,182
Go in there.
297
00:15:50,683 --> 00:15:51,183
Huh.
298
00:15:51,684 --> 00:15:51,684
Huh.
299
00:15:54,853 --> 00:15:56,738
Uh.
300
00:15:56,739 --> 00:15:58,656
Start explaining,
doctor.
301
00:15:58,657 --> 00:15:59,657
Of course you're upset,
302
00:15:59,658 --> 00:16:01,526
you have every right
to be upset.
303
00:16:01,527 --> 00:16:03,861
You didn't win that
mummy in any card game.
304
00:16:03,862 --> 00:16:06,365
You stole it off a
boat in New Orleans.
305
00:16:06,865 --> 00:16:06,865
You stole it off a
boat in New Orleans.
306
00:16:07,866 --> 00:16:09,368
What for?
The necklace?
307
00:16:09,868 --> 00:16:11,369
Well, I hardly
have much use
308
00:16:11,370 --> 00:16:12,870
for a 4,000-year-old
dead woman,
309
00:16:12,871 --> 00:16:14,872
now, do I?
310
00:16:14,873 --> 00:16:14,873
Now, do I?
311
00:16:16,342 --> 00:16:18,092
Why didn't you just
take the damn thing?
312
00:16:18,093 --> 00:16:22,930
Ahh. Now, look,
you don't understand.
313
00:16:22,931 --> 00:16:24,298
There's a curse.
314
00:16:24,299 --> 00:16:26,968
You must be kidding.
315
00:16:26,969 --> 00:16:28,853
No, it's true.
316
00:16:28,854 --> 00:16:30,855
Whoever attempts to
take that necklace
317
00:16:30,856 --> 00:16:33,725
will be rendered...
318
00:16:33,726 --> 00:16:35,978
Rendered what?
319
00:16:36,195 --> 00:16:39,615
You know...
Unable to procreate,
320
00:16:40,032 --> 00:16:41,533
if you take my meaning.
321
00:16:41,900 --> 00:16:41,900
If you take my meaning.
322
00:16:43,318 --> 00:16:44,819
Ha ha ha!
323
00:16:44,820 --> 00:16:47,739
You mean, whoever takes
the family jewels...
324
00:16:47,740 --> 00:16:47,740
You mean, whoever takes
the family jewels...
325
00:16:50,242 --> 00:16:51,243
Loses theirs.
326
00:16:51,744 --> 00:16:52,744
Yes.
327
00:16:52,745 --> 00:16:54,245
Thanks. I'll take
my chances.
328
00:16:54,246 --> 00:16:56,248
No, Mr. sickles!
329
00:16:56,749 --> 00:16:58,249
You're not
listening to me.
330
00:16:58,250 --> 00:17:00,752
I hired a man to
take that necklace off.
331
00:17:00,753 --> 00:17:04,255
That night I found him...
He was castrated.
332
00:17:04,256 --> 00:17:06,758
Well, too bad
your father wasn't,
333
00:17:06,759 --> 00:17:09,761
if you take
mymeaning.
334
00:17:09,762 --> 00:17:11,262
Mr. sickles!
335
00:17:11,263 --> 00:17:12,680
Oh!
336
00:17:12,681 --> 00:17:12,681
Oh!
337
00:17:14,516 --> 00:17:16,818
Ohh.
338
00:17:16,819 --> 00:17:16,819
Ohh.
339
00:17:18,153 --> 00:17:20,906
Good god, sickles.
340
00:17:32,785 --> 00:17:33,785
Center up,
boys. Come on.
341
00:17:33,786 --> 00:17:35,787
20 minutes to showtime.
Let's go.
342
00:17:35,788 --> 00:17:35,788
20 minutes to showtime.
Let's go.
343
00:18:19,381 --> 00:18:21,382
Ah.
344
00:18:21,383 --> 00:18:23,885
Enoch, my boy.
345
00:18:23,886 --> 00:18:23,886
Enoch, my boy.
346
00:18:29,308 --> 00:18:31,809
Seems like you've gotten
out of your cage again,
347
00:18:31,810 --> 00:18:33,311
doesn't it?
348
00:18:33,312 --> 00:18:33,312
Doesn't it?
349
00:18:35,814 --> 00:18:38,684
And you've been a very
naughty boy, haven't you?
350
00:18:40,102 --> 00:18:41,602
Yes.
351
00:18:41,603 --> 00:18:44,106
Poor Dr. kling.
352
00:18:51,113 --> 00:18:51,613
Ah.
353
00:18:52,114 --> 00:18:54,032
Ah, myrna, my sweet.
354
00:18:55,501 --> 00:18:57,502
You two make
a very lovely couple.
355
00:18:57,503 --> 00:18:59,003
Did I tell you that?
356
00:18:59,004 --> 00:18:59,004
Did I tell you that?
357
00:19:00,005 --> 00:19:01,507
Ah, now give me this.
358
00:19:02,007 --> 00:19:04,008
Uhh. Uhh.
359
00:19:04,009 --> 00:19:04,009
Uhh. Uhh.
360
00:19:05,511 --> 00:19:06,511
Come on, honey.
361
00:19:06,512 --> 00:19:07,513
Let me have her, dear.
362
00:19:08,013 --> 00:19:09,014
Yeah.
363
00:19:10,516 --> 00:19:12,017
Ahh. Come on.
364
00:19:12,518 --> 00:19:14,018
Let go.
365
00:19:14,019 --> 00:19:17,472
Come on. You do play
hard to get, don't you?
366
00:19:17,973 --> 00:19:17,973
Come on. You do play
hard to get, don't you?
367
00:19:21,476 --> 00:19:23,394
Ahh.
368
00:19:23,395 --> 00:19:23,395
Ahh.
369
00:19:34,156 --> 00:19:35,157
Naughty...
370
00:19:35,657 --> 00:19:37,159
Boy!
371
00:19:37,659 --> 00:19:39,160
Aah!
372
00:19:39,161 --> 00:19:39,161
Aah!
373
00:19:46,668 --> 00:19:49,170
And now,
ladies and gentlemen,
374
00:19:49,171 --> 00:19:52,173
feeley's fantastic
fairway of freaks
375
00:19:52,174 --> 00:19:53,675
is proud to present
376
00:19:54,176 --> 00:19:56,677
a most unusual
and alarming oddity...
377
00:19:56,678 --> 00:19:59,096
The amazing Enoch,
378
00:19:59,097 --> 00:20:01,600
the 2-faced man.
379
00:20:07,606 --> 00:20:08,606
It's empty.
380
00:20:08,607 --> 00:20:09,575
He escaped.
He's gone.
381
00:20:09,576 --> 00:20:11,577
He cheated us.
382
00:20:12,077 --> 00:20:12,578
There's nothin'
there.
383
00:20:14,580 --> 00:20:15,580
It's a fraud!
384
00:20:15,581 --> 00:20:15,581
It's a fraud!
385
00:20:19,585 --> 00:20:22,587
Eh, rather,
let me direct your attention
386
00:20:22,588 --> 00:20:25,539
to our star attraction.
387
00:20:25,540 --> 00:20:28,042
From far off Egypt
she comes...
388
00:20:28,043 --> 00:20:30,044
Uh, from the valley
of the kings,
389
00:20:30,045 --> 00:20:32,797
her tomb carved deep
in the cliffs
390
00:20:32,798 --> 00:20:37,134
that overlook the ancient
river nile.
391
00:20:37,135 --> 00:20:39,637
Inside that very tomb,
392
00:20:39,638 --> 00:20:42,640
hieroglyphics tell
a tragic tale.
393
00:20:42,641 --> 00:20:44,642
Once young and beautiful,
394
00:20:44,643 --> 00:20:47,144
she spurned pharaoh's
advances,
395
00:20:47,145 --> 00:20:49,647
and was condemned to death.
396
00:20:49,648 --> 00:20:53,150
Wrapped in ceremonial
windings,
397
00:20:53,151 --> 00:20:54,652
she was buried alive,
398
00:20:54,653 --> 00:20:58,155
and placed in this very
selfsame sarcophagus,
399
00:20:58,156 --> 00:21:02,159
which has been her home
for the last 4,000 years.
400
00:21:02,160 --> 00:21:03,995
Ladies and gentlemen,
401
00:21:03,996 --> 00:21:05,963
boys and girls,
402
00:21:05,964 --> 00:21:07,465
I command you
403
00:21:07,466 --> 00:21:12,470
to look upon myrna,
the Egyptian mummy.
404
00:21:12,471 --> 00:21:14,723
Aah!
405
00:21:15,173 --> 00:21:16,174
Oh.
406
00:21:16,675 --> 00:21:16,675
Oh.
407
00:21:23,181 --> 00:21:24,682
Call a policeman!
408
00:21:24,683 --> 00:21:25,933
It's
all right.
409
00:21:25,934 --> 00:21:28,402
Oh, god!
410
00:21:28,403 --> 00:21:28,403
Oh, god!
411
00:21:31,773 --> 00:21:32,773
Dead or alive?
412
00:21:32,774 --> 00:21:34,776
Come on. That's it.
413
00:21:35,277 --> 00:21:35,777
I'm looking for Mr. feeley,
414
00:21:36,278 --> 00:21:37,278
the owner.
415
00:21:37,279 --> 00:21:38,779
Oh, Mr. feeley?
416
00:21:38,780 --> 00:21:40,781
Yeah, Ernest feeley.
417
00:21:40,782 --> 00:21:42,249
Yeah, he's, uh...
418
00:21:42,250 --> 00:21:44,251
He's right over there
next to the wagons.
419
00:21:44,252 --> 00:21:45,703
Right over there.
Thank you.
420
00:21:45,704 --> 00:21:45,704
Right over there.
Thank you.
421
00:21:51,460 --> 00:21:54,211
Are you Ernest feeley,
the owner?
422
00:21:54,212 --> 00:21:55,880
I'm sheriff Hicks.
423
00:21:55,881 --> 00:21:58,216
Well, if it's about
the permit,
424
00:21:58,717 --> 00:21:59,717
I have one.
I assure you.
425
00:21:59,718 --> 00:22:01,519
No, sir. It's not
about any permit.
426
00:22:01,520 --> 00:22:04,271
Do you mind
if I sit?
427
00:22:04,272 --> 00:22:04,272
Do you mind
if I sit?
428
00:22:06,558 --> 00:22:09,193
Mr. feeley, you
may not remember me,
429
00:22:09,194 --> 00:22:11,112
but we met when you
came through here
430
00:22:11,113 --> 00:22:12,614
with your sideshow
last year.
431
00:22:13,065 --> 00:22:16,367
You had some...
Unpleasantness at the time.
432
00:22:16,368 --> 00:22:20,204
Yes. I never did
recover my exhibits.
433
00:22:20,205 --> 00:22:22,623
Well, sir, that's
kind of why I'm here.
434
00:22:22,624 --> 00:22:25,042
There's something I
think you ought to see.
435
00:22:25,043 --> 00:22:25,043
There's something I
think you ought to see.
436
00:22:28,413 --> 00:22:32,416
Now, the local boy
was up and exploring,
437
00:22:32,417 --> 00:22:34,418
and he came across
this cave here.
438
00:22:34,419 --> 00:22:34,419
And he came across
this cave here.
439
00:22:36,421 --> 00:22:40,424
When he saw what was inside,
he came and got us.
440
00:22:40,425 --> 00:22:40,425
When he saw what was inside,
he came and got us.
441
00:22:59,745 --> 00:23:00,861
Mr. feeley.
442
00:23:00,862 --> 00:23:00,862
Mr. feeley.
443
00:23:04,699 --> 00:23:06,700
Good lord.
444
00:23:06,701 --> 00:23:06,701
Good lord.
445
00:23:26,638 --> 00:23:28,139
Ma...
446
00:23:28,140 --> 00:23:28,140
Ma...
447
00:23:31,143 --> 00:23:33,644
Ma... Ma.
448
00:23:33,645 --> 00:23:33,645
Ma... Ma.
449
00:23:49,077 --> 00:23:50,579
Ha ha ha!
450
00:23:51,079 --> 00:23:51,079
Ha ha ha!
451
00:23:52,581 --> 00:23:56,584
Oh, sorry, kiddies,
452
00:23:56,585 --> 00:24:00,588
but that story just makes me
go all to pieces.
453
00:24:00,589 --> 00:24:01,089
But that story just makes me
go all to pieces.
454
00:24:07,095 --> 00:24:11,098
I was a cute little terror tyke,
though, wasn't I?
455
00:24:11,099 --> 00:24:13,100
As for Enoch and myrna,
456
00:24:13,101 --> 00:24:14,603
I guess you figured out
by now
457
00:24:15,103 --> 00:24:17,104
where I get my good looks.
458
00:24:17,105 --> 00:24:20,074
Old 2-face was my daddy,
459
00:24:20,075 --> 00:24:22,577
and the mummy
was my mommy.
460
00:24:30,585 --> 00:24:34,088
Oh, if they'd only lived
long enough to see me
461
00:24:34,089 --> 00:24:37,091
become a star.
462
00:24:37,092 --> 00:24:41,596
We never even got a chance to
play hide and go shriek together.
463
00:24:49,654 --> 00:24:52,640
Captioning made possible by
Warner bros.
464
00:24:52,641 --> 00:24:55,392
Captioned by the national captioning
institute... www.Ncicap.Org...
465
00:24:55,393 --> 00:24:55,393
Captioned by the national captioning
institute... www.Ncicap.Org...
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