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1
00:00:13,079 --> 00:00:15,014
♪
2
00:00:36,369 --> 00:00:38,370
Hey, frankie,
let's go have a picnic.
3
00:00:38,372 --> 00:00:41,106
No! I don't trust you!
4
00:00:41,108 --> 00:00:43,509
I got your favorite cupcakes.
5
00:00:46,112 --> 00:00:48,781
Are they real this time?
6
00:00:48,783 --> 00:00:54,053
( screams ) mom!
7
00:00:54,055 --> 00:00:56,722
He's your brother!
Your damn brother!
8
00:00:56,724 --> 00:00:58,257
( grunts )
9
00:00:59,793 --> 00:01:01,794
Get over here!
10
00:01:01,796 --> 00:01:04,263
Where did you get those cameras,
you little punk?
11
00:01:04,265 --> 00:01:06,732
Ow!
12
00:01:09,369 --> 00:01:11,637
Where'd you get those cameras?!
13
00:01:11,639 --> 00:01:13,305
Did you steal them?!
14
00:01:16,543 --> 00:01:17,810
Get back here,
you little fucker!
15
00:01:17,812 --> 00:01:19,278
I'm gonna kill you!
16
00:01:26,553 --> 00:01:28,620
♪
17
00:01:33,827 --> 00:01:37,296
♪ livin' on the edge
of the city limit line ♪
18
00:01:37,298 --> 00:01:39,698
♪ this is where the boundary
finally ends ♪
19
00:01:39,700 --> 00:01:42,835
♪ and I swear that we're
the last livin' souls ♪
20
00:01:42,837 --> 00:01:44,236
♪ in a populated ghost town
21
00:01:44,238 --> 00:01:45,737
( phone rings )
22
00:01:45,739 --> 00:01:47,706
♪ all the billboards
are our best friends ♪
23
00:01:47,708 --> 00:01:49,575
( phone rings )
24
00:01:49,577 --> 00:01:51,710
♪ on the outside of memphis
all the building look big ♪
25
00:01:51,712 --> 00:01:53,579
♪ and the white picket fences
26
00:01:53,581 --> 00:01:55,581
♪ all dare to charge
around the lawn ♪
27
00:01:55,583 --> 00:01:57,382
♪ and hold their heads
up high ♪
28
00:01:57,384 --> 00:01:59,251
♪ when my headlights
find them out ♪
29
00:01:59,253 --> 00:02:01,420
♪ they'll be the first
to put their hands in the air ♪
30
00:02:01,422 --> 00:02:02,621
( phone rings )
31
00:02:02,623 --> 00:02:05,624
♪ with my radio on
32
00:02:05,626 --> 00:02:08,760
♪ singin' a country song
33
00:02:08,762 --> 00:02:11,630
♪ soft and low
34
00:02:11,632 --> 00:02:15,367
( phone rings )
35
00:02:15,369 --> 00:02:16,902
Mom, I can't talk.
36
00:02:16,904 --> 00:02:18,637
Uh-oh. You sound tense.
37
00:02:18,639 --> 00:02:20,172
I'm not tense.
I'm writing.
38
00:02:20,174 --> 00:02:21,673
Can I call you back?
39
00:02:21,675 --> 00:02:22,875
No, no, no,
it'll only take a second.
40
00:02:22,877 --> 00:02:24,409
What are you writing?
41
00:02:24,411 --> 00:02:25,911
What do you think
I'm writing, mom?
42
00:02:25,913 --> 00:02:28,614
Writing books you never finish
is masturbation, frank.
43
00:02:28,616 --> 00:02:30,215
And I mean that with love,
44
00:02:30,217 --> 00:02:32,618
So don't take it
as an insult.
45
00:02:32,620 --> 00:02:34,253
Anyway, there's a party
46
00:02:34,255 --> 00:02:35,521
On Friday
for your brother,
47
00:02:35,523 --> 00:02:37,356
And he wants you to come.
48
00:02:37,358 --> 00:02:40,359
Mom, I don't see bruce.
I don't talk to bruce.
49
00:02:40,361 --> 00:02:42,694
You know it, he knows it.
50
00:02:42,696 --> 00:02:44,429
It's been three years now!
51
00:02:44,431 --> 00:02:45,631
Get over it!
Mom, I'm hanging up.
52
00:02:45,633 --> 00:02:46,832
I'll call you back.
53
00:02:46,834 --> 00:02:48,934
He's off drugs.
54
00:02:48,936 --> 00:02:50,602
He wanted it to be a surprise.
55
00:02:50,604 --> 00:02:53,372
I know you two have your stuff,
56
00:02:53,374 --> 00:02:54,840
And his counselor
said everyone
57
00:02:54,842 --> 00:02:56,842
Has to go through this
on their own time,
58
00:02:56,844 --> 00:02:58,343
But if you can come
to his graduation thing,
59
00:02:58,345 --> 00:02:59,611
I think you should.
60
00:03:01,614 --> 00:03:04,216
Mom...
61
00:03:04,218 --> 00:03:06,351
I just don't think
it's a good idea.
62
00:03:06,353 --> 00:03:08,353
I'm really into this book and...
63
00:03:08,355 --> 00:03:09,888
I just started a garden.
64
00:03:09,890 --> 00:03:12,191
It looks amazing.
65
00:03:12,193 --> 00:03:13,592
But tell bruce
66
00:03:13,594 --> 00:03:15,194
I'm proud of him.
67
00:03:15,196 --> 00:03:16,662
No, you know what?
I'll tell him myself.
68
00:03:16,664 --> 00:03:18,197
I'll write him a letter.
69
00:03:18,199 --> 00:03:19,464
Oh, my god.
70
00:03:19,466 --> 00:03:21,333
Would you really do that?
71
00:03:21,335 --> 00:03:23,235
And when he finds out
you're not coming
72
00:03:23,237 --> 00:03:24,570
And he overdoses
in a crack house,
73
00:03:24,572 --> 00:03:25,871
We can read it
at his funeral!
74
00:03:25,873 --> 00:03:27,539
( phone slams )
75
00:03:30,310 --> 00:03:32,778
( sighs )
76
00:03:34,714 --> 00:03:36,582
Frank: Fuck!
77
00:03:36,584 --> 00:03:39,785
♪ I don't need
no complications ♪
78
00:03:41,588 --> 00:03:44,790
♪ and I don't need no...
79
00:03:46,559 --> 00:03:50,495
♪ I don't need
no whiskey chasin' ♪
80
00:03:52,465 --> 00:03:56,435
♪ you just set me up
and I'll take it down ♪
81
00:03:56,437 --> 00:03:58,437
♪ yeah
82
00:03:58,439 --> 00:04:02,241
♪ and I don't got
nowhere to be, mama ♪
83
00:04:03,743 --> 00:04:06,812
♪ you put on that music
so damn low ♪
84
00:04:09,349 --> 00:04:12,551
♪ and I will rock you
slow and easy ♪
85
00:04:15,021 --> 00:04:18,423
♪ lots of love
to burn your soul ♪
86
00:04:38,311 --> 00:04:40,379
( door shuts )
87
00:04:46,452 --> 00:04:48,854
Oh, there you are!
Bruce called.
88
00:04:48,856 --> 00:04:52,024
All the other families
are there. I don't wanna
be late. Chris, he's here!
89
00:04:52,026 --> 00:04:53,492
Hi, mom.
90
00:04:53,494 --> 00:04:55,360
Come on,
the "hi" was implied.
91
00:04:55,362 --> 00:04:56,762
Mwah.
92
00:04:56,764 --> 00:04:58,563
A lot of pictures of bruce.
93
00:04:58,565 --> 00:04:59,831
Bonnie hubbard's son
raped a girl
94
00:04:59,833 --> 00:05:01,433
When he got out of rehab.
95
00:05:01,435 --> 00:05:03,302
We want bruce
to feel loved.
96
00:05:03,304 --> 00:05:04,703
Sure.
Chris!
97
00:05:04,705 --> 00:05:06,305
I'm here!
Stop yelling!
98
00:05:06,307 --> 00:05:07,839
Why are you wearing
the burgundy one?
99
00:05:07,841 --> 00:05:10,609
I suggested the blue!
What? You said red!
100
00:05:10,611 --> 00:05:12,344
Tell your son it's time
for him to move back home.
101
00:05:12,346 --> 00:05:13,879
What?
My people are jewish.
102
00:05:13,881 --> 00:05:15,447
Moses led us out of the desert.
103
00:05:15,449 --> 00:05:17,082
It is disrespectful
to go back.
104
00:05:17,084 --> 00:05:19,651
Would you please stop
picking on him?
If what happened to him
105
00:05:19,653 --> 00:05:20,986
At his wedding happened
to you at your wedding,
106
00:05:20,988 --> 00:05:22,721
You'd wanna hide
in the desert, too.
107
00:05:22,723 --> 00:05:24,423
Oh, so now he's guilty?
Is that what you're saying?
108
00:05:24,425 --> 00:05:26,058
Guilty? Who said anything
about him being guilty?
109
00:05:26,060 --> 00:05:28,060
You did! And you said it
in your own words!
110
00:05:28,062 --> 00:05:30,595
Look at that!
That is not a blue sweater!
That's a gray sweater!
111
00:05:30,597 --> 00:05:33,332
We'll have to use your car.
112
00:05:33,334 --> 00:05:34,599
What's wrong with yours?
113
00:05:34,601 --> 00:05:35,801
We don't have cars right now.
114
00:05:35,803 --> 00:05:37,769
Bruce stole them for drugs.
115
00:05:37,771 --> 00:05:40,339
We said we wouldn't tell him!
Who said we wouldn't tell him?
116
00:05:40,341 --> 00:05:43,108
I'm sorry...
Bruce stole your cars
and sold them for drugs?
117
00:05:43,110 --> 00:05:46,378
Why are you so hard
on your brother?
118
00:05:46,380 --> 00:05:48,413
Drug addiction is a disease.
119
00:05:48,415 --> 00:05:50,582
Would you be mad at somebody
because they got cancer?
120
00:05:50,584 --> 00:05:52,551
If they stole my fucking car,
I would.
121
00:05:52,553 --> 00:05:53,952
Just don't mention it tonight.
122
00:05:53,954 --> 00:05:55,987
Besides, the mopeds are fine.
123
00:05:58,658 --> 00:06:00,559
They're all we could afford.
124
00:06:00,561 --> 00:06:02,060
Apparently,
the insurance company
125
00:06:02,062 --> 00:06:04,830
Doesn't consider it theft
if it's family.
126
00:06:04,832 --> 00:06:11,570
( applause )
127
00:06:11,572 --> 00:06:15,440
Hi, my name is bruce,
and I am an addict
and an alcoholic.
128
00:06:15,442 --> 00:06:18,477
( applause )
bruce: Thank you. Thank you.
129
00:06:18,479 --> 00:06:21,747
Today's a big day for me.
I just came out of rehab.
130
00:06:21,749 --> 00:06:23,749
And today
I am 90 days sober.
131
00:06:23,751 --> 00:06:25,650
( applause )
132
00:06:25,652 --> 00:06:27,085
( whispering )
who's that woman?
133
00:06:27,087 --> 00:06:28,520
( applause )
bruce: Thank you. Thank you.
134
00:06:28,522 --> 00:06:29,721
I know her.
135
00:06:29,723 --> 00:06:30,922
( applause )
bruce: Thank you.
136
00:06:30,924 --> 00:06:32,124
( whispering )
be quiet.
Hmm?
137
00:06:32,126 --> 00:06:33,525
Shh.
Yes.
138
00:06:33,527 --> 00:06:34,826
( applause )
thank you.
139
00:06:34,828 --> 00:06:37,562
My disease
had left me in a...
140
00:06:37,564 --> 00:06:39,631
In a drug-induced sleep.
141
00:06:39,633 --> 00:06:41,767
It was rough,
142
00:06:41,769 --> 00:06:44,503
But even then I had a dream.
143
00:06:44,505 --> 00:06:46,905
Just like this guy.
144
00:06:46,907 --> 00:06:48,640
Just like old marty king.
145
00:06:48,642 --> 00:06:50,509
I had a dream.
( chuckles )
146
00:06:50,511 --> 00:06:54,146
My slavery
was not picking cotton
147
00:06:54,148 --> 00:06:56,047
Or eating gumbo
or whatever,
148
00:06:56,049 --> 00:06:59,050
But it was gin
and it was cocaine,
149
00:06:59,052 --> 00:07:02,521
And I have been released.
150
00:07:02,523 --> 00:07:06,191
( applause )
151
00:07:06,193 --> 00:07:08,794
Thank you.
152
00:07:08,796 --> 00:07:11,530
Today I would like
to thank mom...
153
00:07:11,532 --> 00:07:14,065
And dad and frankie.
154
00:07:14,067 --> 00:07:15,534
This is for you.
155
00:07:15,536 --> 00:07:17,602
( applause )
thank you.
156
00:07:24,544 --> 00:07:26,778
Oh!
Bruce: There they are!
157
00:07:26,780 --> 00:07:27,979
There he is!
158
00:07:27,981 --> 00:07:29,648
Ohh...
159
00:07:29,650 --> 00:07:30,849
Mwah.
160
00:07:30,851 --> 00:07:32,117
You look so great today.
161
00:07:32,119 --> 00:07:33,819
There's my leading man!
162
00:07:33,821 --> 00:07:36,988
Say something, frankie!
Would you not do that, please?
163
00:07:36,990 --> 00:07:39,124
Oh, I'm sorry.
164
00:07:39,126 --> 00:07:41,493
I've been waiting three months
to get this puppy back
in my hands.
165
00:07:41,495 --> 00:07:44,496
Bruce put his
directing career on hold
while he was getting better.
166
00:07:44,498 --> 00:07:45,897
They don't allow
cameras in rehab.
167
00:07:45,899 --> 00:07:47,666
( whispering )
is that really jack knoll?
168
00:07:47,668 --> 00:07:49,034
Bruce ( whispering )
oh, yeah, I never told you.
169
00:07:49,036 --> 00:07:50,569
Jack! Jack,
come over and meet my family.
170
00:07:50,571 --> 00:07:52,704
Two seconds!
171
00:07:52,706 --> 00:07:54,639
( whispering ) we might be
doing a picture together.
172
00:07:54,641 --> 00:07:55,941
With you directing?
Uh-huh.
173
00:07:55,943 --> 00:07:58,176
Oh, did you hear that?
Oh, my god!
174
00:07:58,178 --> 00:08:00,812
When did you become
a director, bruce?
175
00:08:00,814 --> 00:08:03,715
Dude, I've been directing
my whole life.
176
00:08:03,717 --> 00:08:06,218
Don't you remember
all those funny movies you used
to make when you were boys?
177
00:08:06,220 --> 00:08:09,821
He tortured him.
Bruce tortured him on film.
178
00:08:09,823 --> 00:08:12,224
That's not true.
179
00:08:14,527 --> 00:08:16,928
( chuckles )
it's good to see you.
180
00:08:16,930 --> 00:08:19,931
I haven't seen you--
I haven't seen you
since the wedding.
181
00:08:19,933 --> 00:08:21,933
Right?
Yep.
182
00:08:21,935 --> 00:08:23,902
You're not still mad
about that, are you?
183
00:08:25,872 --> 00:08:27,873
Let's just
forget about it, bruce.
Right.
184
00:08:27,875 --> 00:08:30,008
You don't wanna talk about it?
No, not really.
185
00:08:30,010 --> 00:08:32,277
It's just that I kinda
wanted to talk about it.
186
00:08:32,279 --> 00:08:35,146
Do you think it would be okay
just to keep this about now?
That's not a problem.
187
00:08:35,148 --> 00:08:39,217
Jack knoll. Isn't he that
actor with all those guns?
Didn't he shoot somebody?
188
00:08:39,219 --> 00:08:43,221
Hey! Bruce, your old man's
fuckin' gossipin' about me,
man.
189
00:08:43,223 --> 00:08:45,223
I'm just kidding, man.
I'm just kidding. I'm jack.
190
00:08:45,225 --> 00:08:46,825
I love you people.
191
00:08:46,827 --> 00:08:48,693
I just grazed him,
didn't really hurt him.
192
00:08:48,695 --> 00:08:52,097
Listen, your son,
this man here...
193
00:08:52,099 --> 00:08:53,698
Saved my life.
194
00:08:53,700 --> 00:08:55,600
If it hadn't been for him,
195
00:08:55,602 --> 00:08:59,271
I would've just ripped my skull,
right from above my eyebrows,
196
00:08:59,273 --> 00:09:02,173
Just ripped it off
and taken my brains
and smashed them out.
197
00:09:02,175 --> 00:09:03,742
This man is a saint.
198
00:09:03,744 --> 00:09:05,310
Those are sweet words.
Thank you, jack.
199
00:09:05,312 --> 00:09:07,245
Bruce,
are these your parents?
200
00:09:07,247 --> 00:09:08,847
Oh, yes. Um...
201
00:09:08,849 --> 00:09:11,316
You must be so proud.
202
00:09:11,318 --> 00:09:13,084
Dharma,
this is my family.
203
00:09:13,086 --> 00:09:14,819
Are you in show business?
204
00:09:14,821 --> 00:09:16,588
Mom, this's dharma d-cup.
205
00:09:16,590 --> 00:09:19,124
She's been in like
a billion porn movies.
206
00:09:19,126 --> 00:09:21,293
Karen: Really?
Yeah, but I'm done
with all that.
207
00:09:21,295 --> 00:09:24,629
I'm gonna try
and get into real acting.
208
00:09:24,631 --> 00:09:26,231
I'm sure you'll be great.
209
00:09:26,233 --> 00:09:27,666
Thanks.
210
00:09:27,668 --> 00:09:29,901
You're a terrific actor.
211
00:09:29,903 --> 00:09:31,570
What?
212
00:09:31,572 --> 00:09:35,106
You...
You have a talent.
213
00:09:35,108 --> 00:09:37,976
You...
The way you played
that comedy.
214
00:09:37,978 --> 00:09:40,712
It's so rare,
so special.
215
00:09:40,714 --> 00:09:41,980
You're a great actor.
Thank you.
216
00:09:41,982 --> 00:09:43,915
What is he talking about?
217
00:09:43,917 --> 00:09:46,117
Your short.
Your short, man. Super.
218
00:09:46,119 --> 00:09:49,254
What--what short?
My short.
219
00:09:49,256 --> 00:09:53,658
The short that I shot
at ucla film school, bro.
Remember?
220
00:09:53,660 --> 00:09:55,994
About the wedding.
221
00:09:55,996 --> 00:09:58,863
Right. You showed them
my wedding video?
222
00:09:58,865 --> 00:10:01,700
You know what?
It's not actually called
"my wedding video" anymore.
223
00:10:01,702 --> 00:10:04,636
It's called
"the wedding video"
for copyright reasons.
224
00:10:08,608 --> 00:10:11,076
Frank. Frank!
225
00:10:11,078 --> 00:10:12,844
Frank, they didn't
know it was real!
226
00:10:12,846 --> 00:10:14,913
They thought that
you were actor!
227
00:10:14,915 --> 00:10:17,616
And come on, it's not
like a million people
haven't seen it already!
228
00:10:17,618 --> 00:10:22,887
It wasn't a million people,
bruce! It was 18 million people!
229
00:10:22,889 --> 00:10:25,890
Okay, I shouldn't
have shown it to jack
without asking you first.
230
00:10:25,892 --> 00:10:27,292
Oh, you think?
231
00:10:27,294 --> 00:10:29,027
And I shouldn't have
put it on the internet.
232
00:10:29,029 --> 00:10:30,228
That was a mistake.
233
00:10:30,230 --> 00:10:32,163
Okay, frank, I'm sorry!
234
00:10:34,000 --> 00:10:35,767
Did you just say
you were sorry?
235
00:10:35,769 --> 00:10:38,169
I shouldn't have put
your wedding tape
on the internet.
236
00:10:38,171 --> 00:10:41,172
I regret it.
It was a long time ago.
237
00:10:41,174 --> 00:10:43,775
I've been a shitty brother,
but I'm a different person now.
238
00:10:43,777 --> 00:10:45,010
I'm sober...
239
00:10:45,012 --> 00:10:48,013
And I would like us
to start again.
240
00:10:50,916 --> 00:10:53,051
( sighs )
241
00:10:53,053 --> 00:10:55,920
All right, fine.
242
00:10:55,922 --> 00:10:59,190
I'm gonna cook you breakfast
before you go tomorrow.
243
00:10:59,192 --> 00:11:00,659
See ya tomorrow.
244
00:11:02,795 --> 00:11:04,429
I love you, frank!
245
00:11:04,431 --> 00:11:06,765
( horn honks )
246
00:11:06,767 --> 00:11:08,900
Hey! Watch it!
247
00:11:08,902 --> 00:11:12,003
( both groan )
248
00:11:12,005 --> 00:11:14,205
Why aren't you in a car?
249
00:11:14,207 --> 00:11:15,807
What?
250
00:11:15,809 --> 00:11:20,078
This is l.A.
Nobody walks here.
251
00:11:20,080 --> 00:11:23,815
Take a little bit of advice
and learn the lay of the land,
flatfoot.
252
00:11:23,817 --> 00:11:26,918
Yeah, well,
let me give you some advice.
There's a rehab back there.
253
00:11:26,920 --> 00:11:29,187
Are you trying to say
I'm an alcoholic?!
254
00:11:29,189 --> 00:11:32,757
Because that is ridiculous!
255
00:11:32,759 --> 00:11:36,428
Alcoholics don't even
ride bicycles, buddy!
256
00:11:36,430 --> 00:11:39,164
They drive in a car!
257
00:11:39,166 --> 00:11:42,233
So you are that!
You are an alcoholic!
258
00:11:42,235 --> 00:11:44,436
( groans )
259
00:11:51,243 --> 00:11:53,912
Lady, are you--are you okay?
260
00:11:57,183 --> 00:11:58,450
Hey.
261
00:12:01,887 --> 00:12:03,955
Great.
262
00:12:12,264 --> 00:12:13,998
Lady...
263
00:12:14,000 --> 00:12:15,800
Lady.
264
00:12:18,270 --> 00:12:19,804
( sighs )
265
00:12:27,413 --> 00:12:30,081
( inhales deeply )
266
00:12:44,964 --> 00:12:47,031
( horn honks )
oh, fuck!
267
00:12:47,033 --> 00:12:48,299
Where am I?
268
00:12:49,401 --> 00:12:51,536
( sighs )
in a parking lot.
269
00:12:51,538 --> 00:12:53,171
Why am I in a parking lot?
270
00:12:53,173 --> 00:12:55,240
You passed out.
271
00:12:56,509 --> 00:12:59,210
So you stayed with me?
272
00:12:59,212 --> 00:13:01,179
Yeah.
273
00:13:01,181 --> 00:13:05,049
Okay, tell me where you live
and I'll take you home.
274
00:13:05,051 --> 00:13:07,185
( crying )
275
00:13:07,187 --> 00:13:11,055
I don't know
where I live anymore.
276
00:13:11,057 --> 00:13:15,426
I went home today and my--
my fiancé...
277
00:13:15,428 --> 00:13:17,428
I dressed like this
to surprise him.
278
00:13:17,430 --> 00:13:20,431
And then I get home
and he was there...
279
00:13:20,433 --> 00:13:22,901
And he was playing tag.
280
00:13:22,903 --> 00:13:24,569
Tag?
281
00:13:24,571 --> 00:13:27,305
Naked tag...
282
00:13:27,307 --> 00:13:29,340
With the guy
who cleans the pool.
283
00:13:29,342 --> 00:13:32,143
The pool boy, I guess.
284
00:13:32,145 --> 00:13:35,847
And he's like, "babe,
what do you mean you haven't
heard of naked tag before?
285
00:13:35,849 --> 00:13:37,148
You haven't heard of it?"
286
00:13:37,150 --> 00:13:39,818
I'm like,
"no, I haven't heard of it,
287
00:13:39,820 --> 00:13:42,487
"because it's not even a game,
and I'm not an idiot,
288
00:13:42,489 --> 00:13:44,222
So stop saying
that it's a game."
289
00:13:44,224 --> 00:13:46,324
He's like,
"babe, I have an erection,
290
00:13:46,326 --> 00:13:49,594
But it's only because
I'm super competitive!"
291
00:13:49,596 --> 00:13:52,931
And I'm like,
"who's competitive in tag?!"
292
00:13:52,933 --> 00:13:55,934
Have you even
ever heard of anybody
that's competitive in tag?!
293
00:13:55,936 --> 00:13:58,203
No, because it's a game that
you play with your friends!
294
00:13:58,205 --> 00:14:00,905
It's a friendly game!
295
00:14:00,907 --> 00:14:03,241
It's usually
pretty friendly.
296
00:14:03,243 --> 00:14:08,246
He gets me drunk
and then he sits me down
and he just tells me...
297
00:14:08,248 --> 00:14:11,115
Everything.
298
00:14:11,117 --> 00:14:14,619
I'm sorry. God.
299
00:14:14,621 --> 00:14:16,955
I have no idea why
I'm laying all of this on you.
300
00:14:16,957 --> 00:14:18,957
I don't even know you.
I'm really sorry.
301
00:14:18,959 --> 00:14:21,226
No, it's okay.
302
00:14:21,228 --> 00:14:22,527
Really.
303
00:14:22,529 --> 00:14:24,963
( sniffles )
304
00:14:24,965 --> 00:14:27,065
I'm sorry.
305
00:14:28,534 --> 00:14:32,270
Um... ( sighs)
306
00:14:32,272 --> 00:14:35,073
( sniffles )
307
00:14:35,075 --> 00:14:36,507
I don't know
what your plans are,
308
00:14:36,509 --> 00:14:38,610
But do you maybe wanna
like go somewhere?
309
00:14:38,612 --> 00:14:41,012
( sighs )
310
00:14:42,147 --> 00:14:44,515
Yeah, you know,
let's go somewhere.
311
00:14:44,517 --> 00:14:46,117
( sniffles )
312
00:14:46,119 --> 00:14:49,120
Sure.
313
00:14:49,122 --> 00:14:50,421
Okay.
314
00:14:50,423 --> 00:14:52,023
( car starts )
great.
315
00:14:52,025 --> 00:14:53,658
( crying )
316
00:14:53,660 --> 00:14:55,226
Would you mind putting
your seat belt on?
317
00:14:55,228 --> 00:14:56,427
It doesn't matter!
318
00:14:56,429 --> 00:14:58,162
It doesn't
matter if I live or die!
319
00:14:58,164 --> 00:14:59,964
Okay.
320
00:15:09,208 --> 00:15:10,942
( whispering )
oh, wait, no. Wait, wait.
321
00:15:10,944 --> 00:15:13,077
My parents
are asleep in there.
322
00:15:13,079 --> 00:15:15,280
There's a--
there's a place in back.
323
00:15:42,074 --> 00:15:44,943
Oh, shit. That's actually
my brother's stuff.
324
00:15:58,524 --> 00:16:00,525
( sighs )
325
00:16:00,527 --> 00:16:02,527
I made this
when I was a kid.
326
00:16:02,529 --> 00:16:05,530
Cool.
327
00:16:05,532 --> 00:16:07,999
So you don't live here?
328
00:16:08,001 --> 00:16:11,002
No. No, um...
329
00:16:11,004 --> 00:16:14,405
I actually live
in death valley.
330
00:16:14,407 --> 00:16:17,008
What do you do in death valley?
331
00:16:17,010 --> 00:16:20,478
I've just been
kind of camping out
and trying to write this novel.
332
00:16:23,515 --> 00:16:24,983
Okay.
Is this all right?
333
00:16:24,985 --> 00:16:26,184
Um...
334
00:16:26,186 --> 00:16:27,552
Yeah, sure.
335
00:16:27,554 --> 00:16:31,489
So what do you write about?
336
00:16:31,491 --> 00:16:32,690
Um...
337
00:16:32,692 --> 00:16:35,193
Revenge, mostly.
338
00:16:36,428 --> 00:16:37,695
Wait, what is your name?
339
00:16:37,697 --> 00:16:39,430
( chuckles )
frank.
340
00:16:39,432 --> 00:16:41,432
Frank, I'm lassie.
341
00:16:41,434 --> 00:16:43,101
Hi.
Hi.
342
00:16:43,103 --> 00:16:45,169
So, frank,
I was just wondering
343
00:16:45,171 --> 00:16:50,274
If perhaps
you could just want me...
Tonight.
344
00:16:50,276 --> 00:16:53,711
You can do, honestly,
whatever you want to me.
345
00:16:53,713 --> 00:16:55,580
Like really
pretty much anything.
346
00:16:55,582 --> 00:16:58,583
Okay, uh, lassie...
Uh-huh.
347
00:16:58,585 --> 00:17:02,020
Could we maybe kiss first?
348
00:17:02,022 --> 00:17:05,556
Yeah. Yeah.
349
00:17:05,558 --> 00:17:07,091
Okay.
350
00:17:24,610 --> 00:17:27,078
What's the matter?
What? What?
351
00:17:27,080 --> 00:17:30,348
You're not hard. What's wrong?
Am I doing something wrong?
352
00:17:30,350 --> 00:17:32,216
No, we--we just started.
353
00:17:32,218 --> 00:17:33,751
Right, but I mean...
354
00:17:33,753 --> 00:17:36,487
Actually, lassie,
you're kind of squeezing.
355
00:17:36,489 --> 00:17:39,323
I am? Sorry.
356
00:17:39,325 --> 00:17:41,325
Is that better?
357
00:17:41,327 --> 00:17:43,728
Uh, I mean,
you're still squeezing.
358
00:17:43,730 --> 00:17:45,196
Really? Fuck.
359
00:17:45,198 --> 00:17:46,597
Okay, how about that?
360
00:17:46,599 --> 00:17:48,466
Um, that's a little better.
361
00:17:48,468 --> 00:17:49,734
Yeah?
362
00:17:51,336 --> 00:17:53,071
Oh, my god.
You can eat my bra.
363
00:17:53,073 --> 00:17:54,605
I'm not just saying that.
It's edible.
364
00:17:54,607 --> 00:17:56,340
I got it at a sex shop.
365
00:17:56,342 --> 00:17:58,076
It's not toxic.
It's a turn-on.
366
00:17:58,078 --> 00:18:01,345
Lassie, I think
I'm okay for now.
367
00:18:01,347 --> 00:18:04,515
Um, maybe later.
368
00:18:04,517 --> 00:18:06,250
I'll just...
I'll keep it on.
369
00:18:06,252 --> 00:18:07,518
So, yeah.
370
00:18:10,856 --> 00:18:12,590
But you're gonna like--
371
00:18:12,592 --> 00:18:16,794
You will eventually get hard
tonight, right?
372
00:18:16,796 --> 00:18:19,797
I'm just asking.
It'll happen?
373
00:18:19,799 --> 00:18:22,800
It's never been
a problem before.
374
00:18:22,802 --> 00:18:25,803
I think--
I think we'll be fine.
375
00:18:25,805 --> 00:18:27,438
Great.
376
00:18:44,256 --> 00:18:46,791
( sighs )
377
00:18:46,793 --> 00:18:50,795
I'm sorry that I'm crying.
It's stupid.
378
00:18:50,797 --> 00:18:52,763
You must feel like
enough of a failure.
379
00:18:52,765 --> 00:18:54,232
( sniffles )
380
00:18:58,170 --> 00:19:00,505
Which you shouldn't.
381
00:19:00,507 --> 00:19:03,508
Lots of guys
can't get erections sometimes.
382
00:19:03,510 --> 00:19:07,478
God damn it!
I just don't understand
why I'm taking care of you!
383
00:19:07,480 --> 00:19:09,147
Because you know what?
384
00:19:09,149 --> 00:19:11,315
This is actually a really
fucking horrible time
385
00:19:11,317 --> 00:19:13,184
For this
to be happening to me!
386
00:19:13,186 --> 00:19:15,186
I just don't--
I don't understand it!
387
00:19:15,188 --> 00:19:19,524
I don't understand
why nobody will fuck me!
388
00:19:19,526 --> 00:19:20,791
Shh!
389
00:19:24,863 --> 00:19:27,331
Your parents.
Right, I'm sorry. Fuck.
390
00:19:27,333 --> 00:19:29,200
( sniffles )
391
00:19:29,202 --> 00:19:31,202
Thank you.
392
00:19:31,204 --> 00:19:32,537
( sighs )
393
00:19:35,607 --> 00:19:37,475
Fucking hell.
394
00:19:37,477 --> 00:19:41,445
I should just go.
So I'll--I'll go.
395
00:19:41,447 --> 00:19:46,484
You don't have to go.
396
00:19:46,486 --> 00:19:48,419
Really, you don't have to go.
397
00:19:48,421 --> 00:19:50,354
All right.
398
00:20:04,903 --> 00:20:08,973
Okay, I literally
never talk about this.
399
00:20:12,377 --> 00:20:15,780
I found out my fiancée
was cheating at our wedding.
400
00:20:15,782 --> 00:20:18,349
Really?
401
00:20:18,351 --> 00:20:24,622
We were only getting married
because she was pregnant.
402
00:20:24,624 --> 00:20:27,758
Turns out it wasn't my kid.
403
00:20:27,760 --> 00:20:29,894
Wow.
404
00:20:29,896 --> 00:20:31,495
My best man.
405
00:20:31,497 --> 00:20:33,297
No way.
406
00:20:35,667 --> 00:20:37,401
What'd you do?
407
00:20:40,806 --> 00:20:42,573
I hit her in the face.
408
00:20:42,575 --> 00:20:46,711
( chuckles )
what? Sorry.
409
00:20:46,713 --> 00:20:50,715
It wasn't really a hit.
It was more like a slap.
410
00:20:50,717 --> 00:20:53,317
( sighs )
411
00:20:53,319 --> 00:20:57,588
And then I pulled
her hair a little.
412
00:20:57,590 --> 00:21:01,325
And then I got
an upset stomach and I...
413
00:21:01,327 --> 00:21:04,996
I threw up on her.
414
00:21:04,998 --> 00:21:06,597
It was fucking terrible.
415
00:21:06,599 --> 00:21:08,466
I knew...
416
00:21:08,468 --> 00:21:11,002
I knew that I knew you
from somewhere!
417
00:21:11,004 --> 00:21:14,005
I saw that video!
I saw your wedding video
on the internet!
418
00:21:14,007 --> 00:21:16,274
Yeah, well,
a lot of people did.
419
00:21:16,276 --> 00:21:17,675
Why did you put that
on the internet?!
420
00:21:17,677 --> 00:21:21,412
I didn't.
My brother did.
421
00:21:21,414 --> 00:21:24,682
It's so weird.
My friends used to watch
that video all the time.
422
00:21:24,684 --> 00:21:28,586
They thought it was like
the funniest shit ever.
423
00:21:28,588 --> 00:21:30,855
Yeah.
424
00:21:30,857 --> 00:21:32,957
I never did, though.
425
00:21:32,959 --> 00:21:37,295
I thought that
it was just sad.
426
00:21:37,297 --> 00:21:41,966
Like watching someone
get their heart stepped on
right in front of you.
427
00:21:41,968 --> 00:21:43,768
Or something.
428
00:21:43,770 --> 00:21:47,972
Well, you're like the only
person who ever saw that.
429
00:21:52,044 --> 00:21:53,511
( sniffles )
430
00:21:56,014 --> 00:22:00,017
You still hate her? The girl.
431
00:22:00,019 --> 00:22:03,587
No.
432
00:22:03,589 --> 00:22:05,589
Yeah.
433
00:22:05,591 --> 00:22:08,459
She sounds
exactly like peter.
434
00:22:08,461 --> 00:22:12,396
Just a lying, cheating,
whore bitch.
435
00:22:12,398 --> 00:22:15,533
My god.
436
00:22:15,535 --> 00:22:17,068
Go on.
437
00:22:17,070 --> 00:22:20,404
No, I just think that
that's really selfish
438
00:22:20,406 --> 00:22:25,643
And cruel and evil
and whore-like.
439
00:22:25,645 --> 00:22:29,547
Okay, one more time. Slow.
440
00:22:29,549 --> 00:22:33,884
Oh, okay. Um, okay.
441
00:22:35,821 --> 00:22:38,689
She was--
what was her name?
442
00:22:38,691 --> 00:22:40,091
Sandra.
443
00:22:40,093 --> 00:22:43,361
Sandra is a fucking...
444
00:22:45,564 --> 00:22:47,031
Horrible...
445
00:22:49,101 --> 00:22:50,901
Cunt-face...
446
00:22:52,604 --> 00:22:54,138
Bitch.
447
00:22:54,140 --> 00:22:57,608
And she fucked you up.
448
00:22:57,610 --> 00:23:02,813
She fucked you up
and she sent you
to death valley to die.
449
00:23:10,989 --> 00:23:12,723
Holy shit! Holy shit!
450
00:23:12,725 --> 00:23:14,725
Okay, now stop talking!
I can't believe it!
451
00:23:14,727 --> 00:23:16,527
Stop talking!
I can't believe it!
452
00:23:18,397 --> 00:23:20,464
( birds chirping )
453
00:23:21,800 --> 00:23:23,868
( grunts )
454
00:23:24,870 --> 00:23:26,804
( sighs )
455
00:23:40,018 --> 00:23:42,086
( chuckles )
456
00:23:48,493 --> 00:23:49,894
Morning, mom.
457
00:23:49,896 --> 00:23:51,495
Morning, horn-dog.
458
00:23:51,497 --> 00:23:54,031
I saw your
lady friend leaving.
459
00:23:54,033 --> 00:23:57,067
I'm gonna take a shower.
460
00:24:02,607 --> 00:24:03,841
Oh. Hey, bro.
Hey. Sorry.
461
00:24:03,843 --> 00:24:05,943
I didn't know
you had company.
462
00:24:05,945 --> 00:24:08,612
Oh, no, that's okay.
You remember claudia,
right? My editor.
463
00:24:08,614 --> 00:24:11,482
Oh, we weren't--
we're just friends.
464
00:24:11,484 --> 00:24:14,485
I mean, she'll come over
and let me eat her out
sometimes,
465
00:24:14,487 --> 00:24:15,786
But it's not serious.
466
00:24:15,788 --> 00:24:17,721
Hi, frank.
467
00:24:17,723 --> 00:24:20,658
Oh, wait.
Bro, I wanted to talk to you.
468
00:24:20,660 --> 00:24:25,930
Um, I wanted you to know that
I filmed you and that chick
last night.
469
00:24:25,932 --> 00:24:28,065
And I am glad that I did.
470
00:24:28,067 --> 00:24:29,733
When she hit you
with her bike--
471
00:24:29,735 --> 00:24:32,736
It was awesome.
Bang! Fuckin' love happens.
472
00:24:32,738 --> 00:24:35,072
Italian vibe.
Let's see what happens next.
473
00:24:35,074 --> 00:24:36,707
Like very early cassavetes.
474
00:24:36,709 --> 00:24:38,843
But I heard you loud
and clear last night
475
00:24:38,845 --> 00:24:42,012
When you talked about
wanting to be in the loop
and all that shit.
476
00:24:42,014 --> 00:24:46,050
And here's the deal:
I dropped a copy of what
I filmed off at jack's.
477
00:24:46,052 --> 00:24:47,852
Good for you, baby.
All right, get it back.
478
00:24:47,854 --> 00:24:49,687
He asked me to be honest,
and I've just been honest.
479
00:24:49,689 --> 00:24:51,255
It's pathetic.
Bruce...
480
00:24:51,257 --> 00:24:53,991
Oh, shit!
Let me handle this.
481
00:24:53,993 --> 00:24:56,126
What?
Bro...
482
00:24:56,128 --> 00:24:57,995
I'm sorry.
483
00:24:57,997 --> 00:25:02,867
Okay, I didn't film you two
having the sex,
484
00:25:02,869 --> 00:25:04,635
If that's what
you're worried about it.
485
00:25:04,637 --> 00:25:06,737
I mean I watched it.
But I didn't film it.
486
00:25:06,739 --> 00:25:10,774
Okay. Bruce, you're gonna
give me the address,
487
00:25:10,776 --> 00:25:13,143
And I am gonna go pick up
whatever it is you gave him.
488
00:25:13,145 --> 00:25:15,779
Why are you being like this?
We just had a beautiful moment.
489
00:25:15,781 --> 00:25:18,115
We had another
beautiful moment--
give me the fucking address!
490
00:25:18,117 --> 00:25:19,717
Boys, stop fighting!
491
00:25:19,719 --> 00:25:21,719
I finally get my life in order!
492
00:25:21,721 --> 00:25:24,522
I finally find someone
in the business
who believes in me!
493
00:25:24,524 --> 00:25:27,525
And I ask my baby brother
for one little favor
494
00:25:27,527 --> 00:25:29,293
To help me achieve my dream,
and will he help?
495
00:25:29,295 --> 00:25:31,629
How is jack knoll
seeing a movie
496
00:25:31,631 --> 00:25:35,633
Of a drunken woman
hitting me with her bike helping
you get your dream, bruce?!
497
00:25:35,635 --> 00:25:37,535
Stop fighting!
498
00:25:37,537 --> 00:25:40,137
Because it's funny, man!
It's fuckin' funny!
499
00:25:40,139 --> 00:25:42,206
Not as funny as the stuff
in the clubhouse.
500
00:25:44,676 --> 00:25:48,012
What did you say?
Nothing.
501
00:25:48,014 --> 00:25:50,881
Bro, you just swore to me
that you didn't film me
in the clubhouse.
502
00:25:50,883 --> 00:25:54,285
No, I did not. I swore that
I didn't film you having sex.
503
00:25:54,287 --> 00:25:55,786
And that was true.
504
00:25:55,788 --> 00:25:58,923
But we had sex
in the clubhouse!
505
00:25:58,925 --> 00:26:01,926
We had sex almost immediately
in the clubhouse.
506
00:26:01,928 --> 00:26:04,295
I mean, that's what
we did in the clubhouse.
507
00:26:04,297 --> 00:26:07,765
That depends how
you define sex.
( chuckles )
508
00:26:07,767 --> 00:26:11,769
Personally, I think that sex
involves one of the people
having an erection.
509
00:26:11,771 --> 00:26:13,971
Yeah, that's usually the case.
Will you shut up?!
510
00:26:13,973 --> 00:26:18,108
I'm just saying, it took quite
a while for that to occur.
511
00:26:18,110 --> 00:26:20,978
But when you finally,
finally did achieve
that erection--
512
00:26:20,980 --> 00:26:24,848
And good for you, bro--
but when you did, I cut.
513
00:26:24,850 --> 00:26:27,117
Because, as far
as I'm concerned,
sex is a private thing,
514
00:26:27,119 --> 00:26:30,588
A sacred thing
between two people,
even if it takes a while.
515
00:26:30,590 --> 00:26:32,089
Bruce, bruce--
listen to my rationale.
516
00:26:32,091 --> 00:26:35,993
How many movies
have sex in them?
517
00:26:35,995 --> 00:26:37,227
All of them.
518
00:26:37,229 --> 00:26:39,129
How many movies
have impotence?
519
00:26:39,131 --> 00:26:40,331
None of them.
520
00:26:40,333 --> 00:26:43,100
Impotence makes us pop.
521
00:26:43,102 --> 00:26:44,902
Am I wrong?
522
00:26:46,738 --> 00:26:48,606
Wow, wow, wow,
you just hate that I'm making
523
00:26:48,608 --> 00:26:50,007
Something of my life,
don't you?
524
00:26:50,009 --> 00:26:52,009
You just hate the fact
that I'm a director now.
525
00:26:52,011 --> 00:26:53,877
No, I don't.
You know why?
526
00:26:53,879 --> 00:26:55,879
Because you're
not a director!
527
00:26:55,881 --> 00:26:58,916
You're a fucking pervert
and a freak!
528
00:26:58,918 --> 00:27:03,921
Well, listen to this:
Action! Cut! Action! Cut!
529
00:27:03,923 --> 00:27:06,991
Fucking action!
530
00:27:06,993 --> 00:27:10,995
That's directing, my friend.
531
00:27:10,997 --> 00:27:13,731
Come on, man, just let him
watch it once.
532
00:27:13,733 --> 00:27:17,001
Did it even occur to you
there's another person
in your stupid film?
533
00:27:17,003 --> 00:27:19,169
I mean, did you even
think about that?
534
00:27:20,171 --> 00:27:21,639
Mr. Knoll!
535
00:27:23,742 --> 00:27:25,075
Jack!
536
00:27:26,211 --> 00:27:27,678
Jack?
537
00:27:30,215 --> 00:27:31,682
You're just gonna walk in?
538
00:27:31,684 --> 00:27:34,018
Jack?
539
00:27:35,286 --> 00:27:37,955
Hello?
540
00:27:37,957 --> 00:27:41,025
( oinking )
541
00:27:45,764 --> 00:27:48,832
Bruce: Buddy?
542
00:27:54,439 --> 00:27:56,173
Is this his house?
543
00:27:56,175 --> 00:27:58,442
He must be redecorating.
544
00:27:58,444 --> 00:28:01,945
Jackie boy!
545
00:28:04,849 --> 00:28:06,784
Hey, man!
546
00:28:06,786 --> 00:28:08,786
Hey! Almost done!
547
00:28:08,788 --> 00:28:12,723
What's up?
You look amazing!
548
00:28:12,725 --> 00:28:15,225
Where's all your stuff, bro?
Collection agency.
549
00:28:15,227 --> 00:28:18,062
Said they're coming
for my treadmill this morning.
550
00:28:18,064 --> 00:28:20,064
Let 'em try.
Let 'em try!
551
00:28:20,066 --> 00:28:21,331
He's got a gun.
He has a gun.
552
00:28:21,333 --> 00:28:22,833
That's a gun.
He's virile.
553
00:28:22,835 --> 00:28:24,435
Mr. Knoll...
Call me jack, son!
554
00:28:24,437 --> 00:28:25,936
How's my form?!
555
00:28:25,938 --> 00:28:28,272
Uh, pretty good.
556
00:28:28,274 --> 00:28:32,242
So my brother
dropped off a dvd--
haven't seen it yet!
557
00:28:32,244 --> 00:28:35,813
I thought you said that
you were gonna watch it
before your agent came over.
558
00:28:35,815 --> 00:28:37,081
Agent dropped me as a client!
559
00:28:37,083 --> 00:28:39,016
Said no one'll hire me!
Fuck him!
560
00:28:39,018 --> 00:28:40,250
I should've fired him
years ago!
561
00:28:40,252 --> 00:28:42,486
Got me up for grandpa roles now!
562
00:28:42,488 --> 00:28:45,355
Come here! Look at this!
Come here!
563
00:28:45,357 --> 00:28:46,857
Hit my ass!
564
00:28:46,859 --> 00:28:48,992
Frank, hit it!
Really hit it! Hit my ass!
565
00:28:48,994 --> 00:28:50,394
I'm not hitting his ass.
Punch his fucking ass.
566
00:28:50,396 --> 00:28:52,162
Come on! Hit it hard!
567
00:28:53,965 --> 00:28:56,366
Yah! Damn right!
Does that feel like
a grandpa ass to you?
568
00:28:56,368 --> 00:28:58,102
Not at all.
No.
569
00:28:58,104 --> 00:29:00,971
That ass is harder
than a dick on viagra!
570
00:29:00,973 --> 00:29:04,141
But no, I got an agent who says,
"take the grandpa roles.
They die in the end."
571
00:29:04,143 --> 00:29:06,744
He's a lunatic.
He has a gun.
572
00:29:06,746 --> 00:29:09,113
We're gonna get the dvd
and get the fuck out of here.
573
00:29:09,115 --> 00:29:11,749
Bruce, we gotta do movies
where there's lots of fucking!
574
00:29:11,751 --> 00:29:14,284
Don't worry, I can see it
in your eyes, I'm fine.
575
00:29:14,286 --> 00:29:16,320
Watch this, motherfuckers!
576
00:29:16,322 --> 00:29:18,922
Where's my addiction, bruce?!
Way back there, jack!
577
00:29:18,924 --> 00:29:20,257
Can you see it, bruce?!
578
00:29:20,259 --> 00:29:21,892
Fucking way over there!
579
00:29:21,894 --> 00:29:24,328
Fuck you, addiction!
You cannot catch me!
580
00:29:24,330 --> 00:29:25,929
I win! I win!
581
00:29:25,931 --> 00:29:27,898
You win!
I win!
582
00:29:29,400 --> 00:29:31,902
Come on!
Let's watch your movie!
583
00:29:31,904 --> 00:29:33,137
Action!
584
00:29:33,139 --> 00:29:34,805
Hey! Watch it!
585
00:29:34,807 --> 00:29:36,440
( both groan )
586
00:29:36,442 --> 00:29:39,476
Make him turn it off!
I can't. He's enjoying it.
587
00:29:41,546 --> 00:29:44,081
Jack: Frank, you got talent!
588
00:29:44,083 --> 00:29:45,415
He said you're talented.
589
00:29:45,417 --> 00:29:47,050
Isn't the camera work good?
590
00:29:47,052 --> 00:29:49,219
Oh!
Frank?
591
00:29:51,556 --> 00:29:54,224
Hey.
Jack: What are you doing?
592
00:29:54,226 --> 00:29:56,960
Oh, shit! Get out!
593
00:29:58,029 --> 00:29:59,897
What the fuck was that?
594
00:29:59,899 --> 00:30:01,431
You didn't see that spark?
What?!
595
00:30:01,433 --> 00:30:02,900
What are you doing here?
596
00:30:02,902 --> 00:30:04,201
That'll dry right out.
597
00:30:04,203 --> 00:30:05,936
What are you doing here?
598
00:30:05,938 --> 00:30:08,071
Frank...
599
00:30:08,073 --> 00:30:10,240
You know my daughter?
She's your daughter?
600
00:30:10,242 --> 00:30:12,442
Dad, could you maybe
put some clothes on? Maybe?
601
00:30:12,444 --> 00:30:14,311
This is your dad?
Yeah.
602
00:30:14,313 --> 00:30:17,247
Oh. Hi.
603
00:30:17,249 --> 00:30:18,515
How do you know my lassie?
604
00:30:18,517 --> 00:30:20,117
I... I...
Rehab.
605
00:30:20,119 --> 00:30:22,219
From rehab, last night.
I was late.
606
00:30:22,221 --> 00:30:23,987
I was on my way to see you.
Yep. Exactly.
607
00:30:23,989 --> 00:30:25,389
And I ran into him.
Exactly.
608
00:30:25,391 --> 00:30:26,857
How do you know my father?
609
00:30:26,859 --> 00:30:30,060
My brother was his roommate.
610
00:30:30,062 --> 00:30:32,329
Hey. In rehab.
Brother?
611
00:30:32,331 --> 00:30:34,331
The brother...?
Yep. Mm-hmm.
That one.
612
00:30:34,333 --> 00:30:36,133
I'm gonna finish my workout.
Okay.
613
00:30:36,135 --> 00:30:38,936
God, what a coincidence.
614
00:30:38,938 --> 00:30:40,470
He's an amazing man,
your father.
615
00:30:40,472 --> 00:30:42,105
Oh, jack, don't forget
the treadmill's on!
616
00:30:42,107 --> 00:30:44,408
( thud )
jack: Oh, shit!
617
00:30:53,151 --> 00:30:54,885
But I fell.
618
00:30:54,887 --> 00:30:56,887
Frank:
What is wrong with you?
619
00:30:56,889 --> 00:30:58,555
People are not
just wandering around,
620
00:30:58,557 --> 00:31:00,524
Waiting for you to make
movies about them, bruce.
621
00:31:00,526 --> 00:31:02,426
This is a public space,
frankie.
622
00:31:02,428 --> 00:31:04,628
They don't wanna be filmed,
they shouldn't come here.
623
00:31:04,630 --> 00:31:06,363
Jack: Where are we going?!
Where are you taking me?!
624
00:31:06,365 --> 00:31:08,498
We're going home, dad.
Take me back in there!
625
00:31:08,500 --> 00:31:10,234
You heard the doctor!
He's an orderly.
626
00:31:10,236 --> 00:31:12,436
Don't contradict me,
god damn it!
627
00:31:12,438 --> 00:31:14,171
What's wrong?
628
00:31:14,173 --> 00:31:16,173
He wants drugs.
Jack!
629
00:31:16,175 --> 00:31:18,008
Come here, please.
Please, listen to me, man.
630
00:31:18,010 --> 00:31:19,376
I am in deep pain, man.
631
00:31:19,378 --> 00:31:21,078
The doctor said
I needed some painkillers.
632
00:31:21,080 --> 00:31:23,013
No, the doctor said
advil is fine.
633
00:31:23,015 --> 00:31:25,415
Told me oxycontin.
He did not say oxy--
634
00:31:25,417 --> 00:31:27,084
He did not say oxycontin.
He said oxycontin.
635
00:31:27,086 --> 00:31:28,552
You do not
need it, jack.
Shh.
636
00:31:28,554 --> 00:31:30,554
Give me a darvon.
Okay, jack, listen to me.
637
00:31:30,556 --> 00:31:32,089
Drugs are not your friend.
I am your friend.
638
00:31:32,091 --> 00:31:33,390
And what I'm gonna do
as your friend,
639
00:31:33,392 --> 00:31:34,591
I'm gonna take you
to a meeting.
640
00:31:34,593 --> 00:31:36,059
Can I get your car keys?
641
00:31:36,061 --> 00:31:38,128
I'm gonna take him to a meeting.
642
00:31:39,264 --> 00:31:41,932
Make sure you get that dvd.
643
00:31:41,934 --> 00:31:44,434
I've been abducted!
Whoa, whoa, whoa! Come here!
644
00:31:44,436 --> 00:31:45,903
Jack! Don't do it, jack!
645
00:31:45,905 --> 00:31:47,204
Give me those fucking pills!
646
00:31:48,539 --> 00:31:51,408
Well, it's nice
to see you again.
647
00:31:51,410 --> 00:31:55,545
Yeah, you really don't
have to say that to me.
648
00:31:55,547 --> 00:31:58,148
What are you talking about?
I mean, I knew you
weren't going to call me.
649
00:31:58,150 --> 00:32:01,151
Which is actually
totally fine, so...
650
00:32:01,153 --> 00:32:04,154
Uh, I already did.
Twice.
651
00:32:04,156 --> 00:32:06,223
Check your phone.
652
00:32:09,560 --> 00:32:11,194
I don't...
Look, frank,
653
00:32:11,196 --> 00:32:14,932
I don't do what we did
last night, okay?
654
00:32:14,934 --> 00:32:16,466
And I know that
lots of girls say that,
655
00:32:16,468 --> 00:32:19,603
But I really never, ever,
ever do that stuff.
656
00:32:19,605 --> 00:32:21,638
Okay.
657
00:32:21,640 --> 00:32:24,508
And now it turns out
that you know my father,
who I want to kill,
658
00:32:24,510 --> 00:32:29,246
And anytime I get sucked back
into his whole crazy world,
659
00:32:29,248 --> 00:32:31,081
It ends very, very badly.
So...
660
00:32:35,620 --> 00:32:38,355
Lassie, I actually
don't know your dad,
661
00:32:38,357 --> 00:32:42,359
But I do know what it's like
to want to kill a relative.
662
00:32:42,361 --> 00:32:44,628
But hey, look...
663
00:32:44,630 --> 00:32:48,098
I'm not trying
to suck you into anything.
664
00:32:48,100 --> 00:32:51,635
I'd just really love
to go out on, like,
665
00:32:51,637 --> 00:32:54,972
A regular date with you,
you know?
666
00:32:54,974 --> 00:32:57,374
We could see a movie.
667
00:32:57,376 --> 00:33:00,043
Maybe get something to eat that
isn't part of your underwear.
668
00:33:00,045 --> 00:33:03,313
( both chuckle )
669
00:33:03,315 --> 00:33:05,449
Oh, my god.
670
00:33:05,451 --> 00:33:08,051
( clears throat )
671
00:33:08,053 --> 00:33:09,586
Hi, everyone,
my name is jack.
672
00:33:09,588 --> 00:33:11,989
Uh, I'm an alcoholic
and a drug addict.
673
00:33:11,991 --> 00:33:13,991
All: Hi, jack.
674
00:33:13,993 --> 00:33:16,994
Drugs and alcohol...
675
00:33:16,996 --> 00:33:20,130
Cost me my career
as a movie star.
676
00:33:20,132 --> 00:33:22,399
And I only say that
in case any of you doubt
677
00:33:22,401 --> 00:33:24,735
That this disease
can take away
678
00:33:24,737 --> 00:33:27,270
The things
that you love the most.
679
00:33:29,007 --> 00:33:31,008
That's what happened to me.
680
00:33:31,010 --> 00:33:33,076
Uh, just one more thing...
681
00:33:33,078 --> 00:33:35,078
If any of you ladies
wanted to have sex with me
682
00:33:35,080 --> 00:33:37,280
Back when I was a somebody
and didn't get a chance...
683
00:33:37,282 --> 00:33:38,548
Meet me out back.
684
00:33:38,550 --> 00:33:40,384
I also have a pool.
685
00:33:42,553 --> 00:33:45,389
( applause )
686
00:33:50,495 --> 00:33:52,496
Ever work at a strip club?
687
00:33:52,498 --> 00:33:54,364
Bruce?
Yeah?
688
00:33:54,366 --> 00:33:56,566
Hi, my name's david.
Hi.
689
00:33:56,568 --> 00:33:59,036
This is my wife natalie.
Hello.
690
00:33:59,038 --> 00:34:02,039
We related to everything
you said in the meeting.
691
00:34:02,041 --> 00:34:05,042
We wanted to be
in the movie business
our whole lives.
692
00:34:05,044 --> 00:34:10,580
And when we got sober,
we swore we would finally do
what we were supposed to do.
693
00:34:10,582 --> 00:34:12,582
That's why we
started our company.
694
00:34:12,584 --> 00:34:14,384
Los angeles pictures.
695
00:34:14,386 --> 00:34:17,087
Los angeles.
696
00:34:17,089 --> 00:34:18,755
Angels.
697
00:34:18,757 --> 00:34:21,191
Did you know that
angels are everywhere?
698
00:34:21,193 --> 00:34:22,726
I did not know that, david.
699
00:34:22,728 --> 00:34:24,628
There's one
standing next to you.
700
00:34:24,630 --> 00:34:26,797
Don't be afraid.
701
00:34:26,799 --> 00:34:28,632
That's sonya.
She follows us.
702
00:34:31,102 --> 00:34:33,103
Did you come with jack knoll?
703
00:34:33,105 --> 00:34:34,538
Are you friends?
704
00:34:34,540 --> 00:34:36,506
Jack? Yeah, big time.
Good friend.
705
00:34:36,508 --> 00:34:39,076
No, hit it, hit it, hit it.
706
00:34:39,078 --> 00:34:42,345
Do you think that you and jack
would be interested in
707
00:34:42,347 --> 00:34:44,481
Making movies with us
about angels?
708
00:34:44,483 --> 00:34:47,484
Thanks to dentistry,
we have plenty of money.
709
00:34:47,486 --> 00:34:51,121
Oh. You guys are like
christian tooth fairies.
710
00:34:51,123 --> 00:34:52,522
( all laugh )
711
00:34:52,524 --> 00:34:54,858
That's amazing!
We're ready to go!
712
00:34:54,860 --> 00:34:56,726
Oh!
713
00:34:56,728 --> 00:34:59,696
We're just looking for
like-minded artists to join us.
714
00:34:59,698 --> 00:35:01,298
You know what's weird?
715
00:35:01,300 --> 00:35:04,134
Jack, only yesterday,
was talking about
716
00:35:04,136 --> 00:35:06,503
How much he loves angels.
717
00:35:06,505 --> 00:35:08,805
( gasps )
oh, my god.
718
00:35:08,807 --> 00:35:11,808
It's a miracle.
It's a miracle.
719
00:35:11,810 --> 00:35:14,244
So, how much money
do you guys have?
720
00:35:14,246 --> 00:35:15,445
( both laugh )
721
00:35:15,447 --> 00:35:16,646
We have a lot.
Shh.
722
00:35:16,648 --> 00:35:18,648
Uh-oh. Shh.
723
00:35:18,650 --> 00:35:20,250
Shall we pray?
724
00:35:20,252 --> 00:35:21,852
Let's!
Let's pray!
725
00:35:36,801 --> 00:35:39,136
Whoa. Whoa, whoa, whoa,
claudia...
726
00:35:39,138 --> 00:35:43,340
Shh. Shh. Shh.
Be very quiet.
727
00:35:46,410 --> 00:35:48,411
Help! Mom!
728
00:35:48,413 --> 00:35:50,147
Shut the fuck up!
729
00:35:50,149 --> 00:35:52,415
Okay, okay! Just do it!
730
00:35:52,417 --> 00:35:54,184
( gasps )
731
00:35:54,186 --> 00:35:56,253
( door opens )
732
00:35:57,421 --> 00:35:59,422
Hey, bro.
Where you been?
733
00:35:59,424 --> 00:36:01,424
Well, jack and I
went to a meeting.
734
00:36:01,426 --> 00:36:04,161
After which I was
approached by some
very serious film producers.
735
00:36:04,163 --> 00:36:05,929
I need my keys.
I'm late to meet lassie.
736
00:36:05,931 --> 00:36:07,364
Okay, have a good time.
737
00:36:07,366 --> 00:36:08,765
You got the dvd, right?
738
00:36:08,767 --> 00:36:11,668
Weren't you supposed
to get the dvd?
739
00:36:13,304 --> 00:36:14,704
How do you know
he's not home?
740
00:36:14,706 --> 00:36:16,239
He stayed for
another meeting.
741
00:36:16,241 --> 00:36:17,908
So, where you
gonna take lassie?
742
00:36:17,910 --> 00:36:20,177
Just get the dvd
out of the player
and stop talking.
743
00:36:20,179 --> 00:36:22,245
Why are you always
so mean to me?
744
00:36:25,449 --> 00:36:26,716
It's fucking gone!
745
00:36:26,718 --> 00:36:28,685
Shh. He's sleeping.
746
00:36:29,654 --> 00:36:30,921
Frank: Fine.
747
00:36:32,356 --> 00:36:33,890
Where are you going?
748
00:36:33,892 --> 00:36:35,392
I'm going to get it.
749
00:36:40,331 --> 00:36:41,865
What if he has an alarm?
750
00:36:41,867 --> 00:36:44,868
You think he has an alarm?
He has no furniture!
751
00:36:44,870 --> 00:36:47,470
But you think he's
gonna pay for an alarm?
752
00:36:47,472 --> 00:36:49,606
Use your head, frankie!
753
00:36:49,608 --> 00:36:51,875
I'm sorry!
I'm not a god damn criminal!
754
00:36:51,877 --> 00:36:53,476
Yeah, well,
it's just as well,
755
00:36:53,478 --> 00:36:54,945
Because you'd be
a terrible one.
756
00:36:56,614 --> 00:36:59,883
Bruce, the guy has guns!
I know he has guns!
757
00:36:59,885 --> 00:37:02,852
And he will use them on us
if he ever watches that video.
758
00:37:02,854 --> 00:37:04,821
So are you gonna
help me get it back?
759
00:37:04,823 --> 00:37:06,923
Or are you gonna
stand out here all night
and whine like a little bitch?
760
00:37:06,925 --> 00:37:08,792
Oh, I'm a bitch?
I'm a bitch?
761
00:37:08,794 --> 00:37:10,393
Then how come
you're the one
762
00:37:10,395 --> 00:37:12,429
Always sucking
jack knoll's balls?
763
00:37:12,431 --> 00:37:13,663
He's my friend!
764
00:37:13,665 --> 00:37:15,732
( squeals )
765
00:37:17,635 --> 00:37:20,637
The pig is in the pool.
The pig is in the pool?!
766
00:37:20,639 --> 00:37:23,306
Fuck.
He's fine.
He's swimming.
767
00:37:23,308 --> 00:37:26,376
What are you talking about?!
Pigs can't swim!
768
00:37:26,378 --> 00:37:28,245
Jack shouldn't have
kept a pig by the pool.
769
00:37:28,247 --> 00:37:30,447
It's irresponsible.
It's not our fault.
770
00:37:30,449 --> 00:37:32,249
We are not
leaving him in there!
771
00:37:32,251 --> 00:37:33,783
Fine, you go get him.
You get him!
772
00:37:33,785 --> 00:37:35,452
I'm going on a date
after this!
773
00:37:35,454 --> 00:37:36,786
I can't swim!
What?!
774
00:37:36,788 --> 00:37:38,922
I can't swim, frankie!
I never have!
775
00:37:38,924 --> 00:37:41,291
I don't like water!
I can't even drink the stuff!
776
00:37:41,293 --> 00:37:44,461
Fuck!
777
00:37:50,601 --> 00:37:53,336
( gasps )
778
00:37:53,338 --> 00:37:56,573
I think he's dead!
I think he's dead!
779
00:37:56,575 --> 00:37:58,675
Heimlich him!
Heimlich him?!
780
00:37:58,677 --> 00:38:02,545
Do it! Heimlich him!
Squeeze his little belly!
781
00:38:02,547 --> 00:38:03,980
Oh, shit!
782
00:38:03,982 --> 00:38:08,785
( squeals )
783
00:38:10,288 --> 00:38:13,423
Is that a condom?
784
00:38:13,425 --> 00:38:15,458
Yeah, that's definitely
a condom.
785
00:38:15,460 --> 00:38:17,627
Get it off!
786
00:38:17,629 --> 00:38:20,864
Who the fuck is out here?!
Jack! Jack! It's bruce!
787
00:38:20,866 --> 00:38:22,866
Don't shoot, don't shoot!
What are you doing here?
788
00:38:22,868 --> 00:38:25,935
I was worried about you.
Hey, dharma d-cup.
789
00:38:25,937 --> 00:38:28,938
And I thought it would be good
if I could be here when
you got home.
790
00:38:28,940 --> 00:38:32,475
And it's a good thing
that we were, because your pig
fell in the pool, man.
791
00:38:32,477 --> 00:38:34,377
Is he all right?
He's fine.
792
00:38:34,379 --> 00:38:35,645
We saved him.
793
00:38:35,647 --> 00:38:37,480
Mr. Knoll...
794
00:38:37,482 --> 00:38:38,882
Since we're already here,
795
00:38:38,884 --> 00:38:41,751
Would you like us
to get the dvd player fixed?
796
00:38:41,753 --> 00:38:43,486
That's a good idea, frankie.
797
00:38:43,488 --> 00:38:44,754
Jack: Oh, don't worry about it.
798
00:38:44,756 --> 00:38:46,489
My housekeeper
took it home with her.
799
00:38:46,491 --> 00:38:47,991
Her husband fixes 'em.
800
00:38:50,895 --> 00:38:52,962
( latin hip hop playing )
801
00:39:15,386 --> 00:39:17,387
Hey, guys.
802
00:39:17,389 --> 00:39:19,789
We're looking for
ramon and celia.
803
00:39:19,791 --> 00:39:21,791
They just left
right now, bro.
804
00:39:21,793 --> 00:39:25,061
Right. Um, do you know
where they went?
805
00:39:25,063 --> 00:39:27,864
None of your business.
806
00:39:27,866 --> 00:39:30,867
You're done now?
807
00:39:30,869 --> 00:39:32,535
What's up, homes?
808
00:39:32,537 --> 00:39:35,071
Listen, cecilia,
the chiquita who lives here,
809
00:39:35,073 --> 00:39:37,674
She works for a guy
called jack knoll.
810
00:39:37,676 --> 00:39:41,678
You know jack knoll?
He's a big tv actor.
811
00:39:41,680 --> 00:39:43,680
You don't have a tv.
That's okay.
812
00:39:43,682 --> 00:39:46,416
Jack's a really good amigo
of mine,
813
00:39:46,418 --> 00:39:49,452
And he sent me over
to just grab something from--
814
00:39:49,454 --> 00:39:51,454
They just left. If you
wanna come back a little--
815
00:39:51,456 --> 00:39:53,456
Maybe we'll just
have a quick look.
816
00:39:53,458 --> 00:39:55,125
Maybe I'll just
break your fucking legs
if you take another step.
817
00:39:55,127 --> 00:39:57,994
Oh, you're gonna do it?
818
00:39:57,996 --> 00:40:00,430
Okay. You're a lot bigger
standing up.
819
00:40:00,432 --> 00:40:02,132
Frank: Sorry to disturb you.
Just get the fuck out of here.
820
00:40:02,134 --> 00:40:04,667
You see that?
821
00:40:20,718 --> 00:40:23,186
( clattering )
822
00:40:29,160 --> 00:40:31,928
I can see it!
It's just here!
823
00:40:31,930 --> 00:40:33,196
Oh, my god.
824
00:40:36,600 --> 00:40:37,867
You have to do it.
825
00:40:37,869 --> 00:40:41,604
What?
You have to go in.
826
00:40:41,606 --> 00:40:44,174
I swore on my sobriety that
I wouldn't steal anymore, frank.
827
00:40:44,176 --> 00:40:46,509
And besides,
breaking and entering
a stranger's home
828
00:40:46,511 --> 00:40:49,145
Is definitely a felony,
and I've already
got two strikes!
829
00:40:49,147 --> 00:40:51,481
If you think you're going
to manipulate me and get me--
830
00:40:51,483 --> 00:40:56,619
Fine! I'll go. I'll do it.
That's fine.
831
00:40:56,621 --> 00:40:58,488
Bruce! Neither of us
should do it!
832
00:40:58,490 --> 00:41:01,758
But, frank, if I get caught
and go down for 30 years,
833
00:41:01,760 --> 00:41:03,193
Will you do me a favor?
834
00:41:03,195 --> 00:41:05,728
Promise you won't put mom
in a nursing home.
835
00:41:08,032 --> 00:41:11,234
Frank: Wait! Wait!
836
00:41:19,643 --> 00:41:21,110
Stop pushing me!
Okay.
837
00:41:24,215 --> 00:41:25,748
( clattering )
ugh!
838
00:41:28,152 --> 00:41:29,619
You okay?
839
00:41:38,529 --> 00:41:40,597
( tv playing )
840
00:41:56,080 --> 00:41:59,916
( speaking spanish )
841
00:42:01,585 --> 00:42:04,087
( speaking spanish )
842
00:42:04,089 --> 00:42:06,055
( grunting )
843
00:42:06,057 --> 00:42:09,959
( speaking spanish )
844
00:42:18,702 --> 00:42:21,170
Aah!
845
00:42:21,172 --> 00:42:24,173
What are you doing?!
He's attacking me!
846
00:42:24,175 --> 00:42:28,077
Shake him off!
He's really strong!
847
00:42:28,079 --> 00:42:30,179
Frank, frank! Stab him!
848
00:42:30,181 --> 00:42:32,148
What?!
Take this knife and stab him!
849
00:42:32,150 --> 00:42:33,783
I'm not fucking stabbing him,
bruce!
850
00:42:33,785 --> 00:42:35,251
He's a million years old,
it doesn't matter!
851
00:42:35,253 --> 00:42:38,021
Okay, just bring him over here!
I'll stab him!
852
00:42:38,023 --> 00:42:41,758
Aah! He fucking bit me!
853
00:42:41,760 --> 00:42:43,826
Give me the dvd player!
854
00:42:43,828 --> 00:42:47,230
( speaking spanish )
855
00:42:47,232 --> 00:42:49,132
Frank, good luck.
856
00:42:50,734 --> 00:42:52,602
Bruce! Bruce!
857
00:42:52,604 --> 00:42:53,903
What the fuck?!
858
00:43:03,280 --> 00:43:06,015
It really took you
14 hours to get me out?
859
00:43:06,017 --> 00:43:09,152
When bruce gets arrested,
we always let him
spend the night.
860
00:43:09,154 --> 00:43:12,155
Your mother and I decided
we shouldn't play favorites.
861
00:43:12,157 --> 00:43:14,891
Bruce is a fucking criminal!
862
00:43:14,893 --> 00:43:16,626
Ex-criminal.
863
00:43:16,628 --> 00:43:19,162
And you're scarcely
in any position to judge.
864
00:43:19,164 --> 00:43:21,164
Here.
865
00:43:21,166 --> 00:43:22,832
Come on.
866
00:43:29,773 --> 00:43:32,241
Stop sign!
Oh! Oh! Oh!
867
00:43:42,186 --> 00:43:44,187
Ah, there we go.
868
00:43:48,258 --> 00:43:50,326
( phone rings )
869
00:43:50,328 --> 00:43:51,728
Hello.
870
00:43:51,730 --> 00:43:53,863
I am so sorry about last night.
871
00:43:53,865 --> 00:43:55,865
Don't even worry about it.
Bruce called me.
872
00:43:55,867 --> 00:43:57,400
He told me all about
your father's scare.
873
00:43:57,402 --> 00:43:59,736
Are they sure
that it's not a heart attack?
874
00:43:59,738 --> 00:44:03,039
Yeah, he's...
875
00:44:03,041 --> 00:44:04,774
They said he's fine.
876
00:44:04,776 --> 00:44:06,643
Good.
877
00:44:06,645 --> 00:44:09,045
So, you wanna
get together later?
878
00:44:09,047 --> 00:44:12,315
Right. Well...
879
00:44:12,317 --> 00:44:15,084
Frank, I just don't think
that I have the time.
880
00:44:16,387 --> 00:44:20,056
Right. Okay.
881
00:44:20,058 --> 00:44:21,924
The relief organization
that I work for,
they just offered me
882
00:44:21,926 --> 00:44:24,127
This position in china
that I'm thinking about taking.
883
00:44:24,129 --> 00:44:26,863
So, it's just
kinda crazy right now.
884
00:44:26,865 --> 00:44:29,399
But if I'm ever
in death valley,
885
00:44:29,401 --> 00:44:33,002
Then, you know,
I'll absolutely give you a call.
886
00:44:33,004 --> 00:44:35,805
Okay.
887
00:44:35,807 --> 00:44:39,809
Okay. Have a safe trip.
888
00:44:39,811 --> 00:44:41,210
( beeps )
889
00:44:46,450 --> 00:44:48,351
Ow! Fuck. Ow.
890
00:44:50,254 --> 00:44:52,221
Hey, bro. I got it.
891
00:44:52,223 --> 00:44:54,257
All broken up.
892
00:44:56,260 --> 00:45:00,263
I also got all the tape.
That's for you as well.
893
00:45:00,265 --> 00:45:03,399
And don't worry, jack's maid
isn't gonna press charges.
894
00:45:05,169 --> 00:45:06,436
Are you okay, bro?
895
00:45:06,438 --> 00:45:08,771
Did someone
touch you in prison?
896
00:45:15,012 --> 00:45:18,414
Look at me and tell me
you don't have any more copies.
897
00:45:18,416 --> 00:45:20,783
( sighs )
898
00:45:20,785 --> 00:45:24,787
I swear on my sobriety
899
00:45:24,789 --> 00:45:27,290
That I don't have
any more copies.
900
00:45:36,467 --> 00:45:39,402
Now swear that
no one else has any.
901
00:45:42,473 --> 00:45:44,474
Bruce:
Okay, since your impotence
902
00:45:44,476 --> 00:45:46,843
Is apparently
so embarrassing to you,
903
00:45:46,845 --> 00:45:49,979
I had claudia
completely re-edit my movie.
904
00:45:49,981 --> 00:45:51,380
Which means, technically,
905
00:45:51,382 --> 00:45:53,316
I don't even have
to show it to you.
906
00:45:53,318 --> 00:45:54,851
Because as you will soon see,
907
00:45:54,853 --> 00:45:56,986
This movie no longer
has anything to do with you.
908
00:45:56,988 --> 00:45:58,321
But I'm happy
for you to see it,
909
00:45:58,323 --> 00:46:00,523
Because you're my brother
and I love you.
910
00:46:00,525 --> 00:46:02,859
Claudia,
play it for him.
911
00:46:02,861 --> 00:46:05,027
Well, what you're about to see,
in my opinion,
912
00:46:05,029 --> 00:46:07,764
Is a serious step back
from the integrity
of bruce's original work.
913
00:46:07,766 --> 00:46:10,032
Would you just press play,
please.
914
00:46:10,034 --> 00:46:14,303
Okay, will you just
stop yelling at me?
You're being rude.
915
00:46:14,305 --> 00:46:16,773
Just play it.
916
00:46:16,775 --> 00:46:18,474
♪
917
00:46:27,050 --> 00:46:30,086
What's wrong?
What's wrong?
What? What?
918
00:46:30,088 --> 00:46:32,021
( sped-up voice )
you're not hard.
What's wrong wrong?
919
00:46:32,023 --> 00:46:36,192
Am I doing something wrong?
No, no, no. We just started.
920
00:46:36,194 --> 00:46:40,897
Um, actually,
you're kind of squeezing.
921
00:46:40,899 --> 00:46:44,167
I originally planned to put
fuzz face on the genitals,
922
00:46:44,169 --> 00:46:47,170
But it's actually a lot funnier
with genitals.
923
00:46:47,172 --> 00:46:51,274
Especially since you were
having so much trouble
with your genitals.
924
00:46:51,276 --> 00:46:54,243
I'm sorry.
Who the fuck are you?!
Bruce: This is arthur.
925
00:46:54,245 --> 00:46:58,314
Arthur, this is frank.
Arthur's a bigwig
in the whole fuzz-face game.
926
00:46:58,316 --> 00:47:00,583
And what exactly did you
plan to do with this?
927
00:47:00,585 --> 00:47:03,319
It's gonna be submitted to
a sex-tape site in the valley.
928
00:47:03,321 --> 00:47:05,588
It's a do-it-yourself
fornication and lighting
emporium
929
00:47:05,590 --> 00:47:08,424
Called choose a lamp
and go fuck each other dot com.
930
00:47:08,426 --> 00:47:12,061
Please get hard!
Please get hard!
Please get hard!
931
00:47:12,063 --> 00:47:13,329
Aah!
932
00:47:13,331 --> 00:47:15,164
Oh, shit!
933
00:47:15,166 --> 00:47:17,166
Claudia: Frank, you ungrateful
little bitch!
934
00:47:17,168 --> 00:47:19,135
We did this so you wouldn't
have to be embarrassed!
935
00:47:19,137 --> 00:47:21,037
Aah!
936
00:47:24,041 --> 00:47:27,977
( frank and bruce grunting )
937
00:47:27,979 --> 00:47:30,847
Hey, idiots, I uploaded it
without the fuzz face.
938
00:47:30,849 --> 00:47:33,082
Now your film is gonna be seen
the way it was meant to be seen.
939
00:47:33,084 --> 00:47:34,584
( grunting )
940
00:47:34,586 --> 00:47:37,453
What?!
941
00:47:37,455 --> 00:47:39,088
Are you into lesbians?
942
00:47:39,090 --> 00:47:41,123
That's a thing
with guys, right?
943
00:47:41,125 --> 00:47:43,059
The girl
is jack knoll's daughter!
944
00:47:43,061 --> 00:47:44,460
Great art hurts, bruce!
945
00:47:44,462 --> 00:47:50,366
Mmm, boobs.
I love your boobs. Mmm.
946
00:47:52,002 --> 00:47:53,936
( tires screech )
947
00:47:53,938 --> 00:47:55,605
( horn honks )
do not honk my horn!
948
00:47:55,607 --> 00:47:59,075
Can you go around him?
Oh! Oh! Oh!
949
00:47:59,077 --> 00:48:02,078
Look who's suddenly nervous
about someone seeing the movie!
950
00:48:02,080 --> 00:48:04,647
Yes, I am nervous
about being killed!
951
00:48:04,649 --> 00:48:07,450
As soon as he sees that video,
you don't think he's
gonna kill you, too?
952
00:48:07,452 --> 00:48:10,119
I am nervous about
being actually shot!
953
00:48:10,121 --> 00:48:12,488
Not about the possibility
of maybe somebody
on the internet
954
00:48:12,490 --> 00:48:15,658
Seeing my embarrassing wiener!
955
00:48:18,395 --> 00:48:19,996
( grunting )
956
00:48:19,998 --> 00:48:22,064
Bruce: Open hand! Open hand!
957
00:48:52,129 --> 00:48:55,031
Hey.
Excuse me?
958
00:48:55,033 --> 00:48:57,566
Kip. Hip.
It's him. It's him.
959
00:48:57,568 --> 00:49:01,304
( laughs )
ah, your video was dope, dog.
960
00:49:01,306 --> 00:49:02,605
I'm the director.
961
00:49:02,607 --> 00:49:05,474
The most original
sex tape ever made, right?
962
00:49:05,476 --> 00:49:08,077
Shut your mouth.
We'd like it back.
963
00:49:08,079 --> 00:49:09,612
I mean,
a sex tape with no sex:
964
00:49:09,614 --> 00:49:11,580
That is just like...
Genius.
965
00:49:11,582 --> 00:49:13,349
Yeah, it was great.
966
00:49:13,351 --> 00:49:15,351
The thing is, it was actually
sent to you by mistake.
967
00:49:15,353 --> 00:49:17,486
So, we're really gonna
need you to destroy it.
968
00:49:17,488 --> 00:49:20,623
I can't do that.
Once it goes up,
it's up for 72 hours.
969
00:49:20,625 --> 00:49:23,159
Wait, wait wait.
You're saying it's on
the internet now?
970
00:49:23,161 --> 00:49:26,195
Come check it out.
You got some great
feedback, dog.
971
00:49:26,197 --> 00:49:30,499
Dad! Cut it
with the welding, man!
Come on!
972
00:49:30,501 --> 00:49:33,202
Is that all for me? Oh, my god.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's you.
973
00:49:33,204 --> 00:49:35,271
Here's the deal:
Either take it
down right now or--
974
00:49:35,273 --> 00:49:37,273
Is five boners good?
Five boners is great.
975
00:49:37,275 --> 00:49:39,976
That's five out of five?
Five out of five boners.
976
00:49:39,978 --> 00:49:41,277
And they're
real stingy with boners.
977
00:49:41,279 --> 00:49:42,545
Yeah, they don't give boners
for anybody.
978
00:49:42,547 --> 00:49:45,047
Dad, we have customers!
979
00:49:45,049 --> 00:49:46,682
Pal, pal,
you wanna negotiate?
No, I don't.
980
00:49:46,684 --> 00:49:48,417
They call me alfred bitchcock.
981
00:49:48,419 --> 00:49:50,419
( laughs )
that's hilarious.
That is funny.
982
00:49:50,421 --> 00:49:52,088
I don't know
what that means, though.
983
00:49:52,090 --> 00:49:53,456
You want a car?
I don't want a car.
984
00:49:53,458 --> 00:49:54,724
I got a '93 honda
right outside.
985
00:49:54,726 --> 00:49:57,193
I have a dui
and I drive a vespa.
986
00:49:57,195 --> 00:49:59,495
Kinky in kuala lumpur
thinks that I'm a visionary.
987
00:49:59,497 --> 00:50:02,765
If other men are on our site
and they see a guy like you,
988
00:50:02,767 --> 00:50:04,767
Having trouble
getting an erection,
989
00:50:04,769 --> 00:50:07,470
Keeping an erection,
forming an erection...
Right.
990
00:50:07,472 --> 00:50:10,206
I think that
they'll feel a lot
better about themselves.
991
00:50:10,208 --> 00:50:13,743
I don't want to be too forward,
but would you like to get some
coffee or something later?
992
00:50:13,745 --> 00:50:15,611
Any time.
Oh, that'd be great.
993
00:50:15,613 --> 00:50:17,747
Oh, wait, did you
mean romantically?
994
00:50:17,749 --> 00:50:20,182
Most certainly romantically.
995
00:50:20,184 --> 00:50:22,018
Bruce, can we leave, please?
Sure.
996
00:50:22,020 --> 00:50:24,253
All right.
Hey, send us more stuff.
997
00:50:24,255 --> 00:50:26,055
Seriously, guys,
you cannot fucking mess with
people's lives like this!
998
00:50:26,057 --> 00:50:28,157
( whispering )
I really appreciate
your support.
999
00:50:28,159 --> 00:50:30,126
You will take this down,
or you will face
the fucking consequences!
1000
00:50:30,128 --> 00:50:32,128
( whispering )
I will call you.
1001
00:50:32,130 --> 00:50:34,363
Do you think
I didn't just see that?
1002
00:50:34,365 --> 00:50:38,100
You heard the guy.
They've only got like
15,000 subscribers, tops,
1003
00:50:38,102 --> 00:50:41,370
Mostly in asia, and he's gonna
take it down in 72 hours.
1004
00:50:41,372 --> 00:50:43,806
I'm not waiting 72 hours!
1005
00:50:43,808 --> 00:50:47,143
Why are you so embarrassed
about your impotency?
1006
00:50:47,145 --> 00:50:50,679
I don't have impotency!
1007
00:50:50,681 --> 00:50:53,682
I had a brief
one-time-only episode.
1008
00:50:53,684 --> 00:50:57,319
It happens to everyone.
I was impotent last night.
1009
00:50:57,321 --> 00:51:00,489
I know. I was.
I mean, I had just
watched your video.
1010
00:51:00,491 --> 00:51:02,825
So it was probably some kind of
fraternal sympathy softie.
1011
00:51:02,827 --> 00:51:05,561
But even so, claudia
had to put three fingers
1012
00:51:05,563 --> 00:51:07,396
Up my ass last night
to get me hard.
1013
00:51:07,398 --> 00:51:09,799
I understand your pain.
We're family.
1014
00:51:09,801 --> 00:51:11,734
Hey. David!
1015
00:51:11,736 --> 00:51:13,803
No, this is a good time.
I've just come from church.
1016
00:51:23,713 --> 00:51:26,615
Lassie:
Do you want me to hum?
It's just my jaw hurts.
1017
00:51:26,617 --> 00:51:28,584
Mother of god...
1018
00:51:28,586 --> 00:51:30,086
Okay, dad, that's enough.
1019
00:51:30,088 --> 00:51:32,788
Well, that was excruciating.
1020
00:51:32,790 --> 00:51:34,390
Just tell me
you can get it down.
1021
00:51:34,392 --> 00:51:36,525
This is outside
of our area of expertise,
1022
00:51:36,527 --> 00:51:39,728
Although sydney
did just email me
that it is illegal
1023
00:51:39,730 --> 00:51:42,198
To film someone
in an unflattering manner
without their knowledge.
1024
00:51:42,200 --> 00:51:44,100
And that was
definitely unflattering.
1025
00:51:44,102 --> 00:51:45,367
Oh, dad!
1026
00:51:45,369 --> 00:51:47,336
What? Sidney, he's my partner.
1027
00:51:47,338 --> 00:51:49,705
How am I suppose to help you
if I don't know what's
going on?
1028
00:51:49,707 --> 00:51:54,310
I think you should call
judge collins and have him
issue a take-down order.
1029
00:51:54,312 --> 00:51:56,178
Oh, here's his number.
Thank you, dear.
1030
00:51:58,448 --> 00:52:00,583
Oh, you gotta be kidding me!
You showed the intern?!
1031
00:52:00,585 --> 00:52:03,586
Everything here
is confidential.
1032
00:52:09,493 --> 00:52:12,728
They're dentists?
That's right,
and they are super rich, mom.
1033
00:52:12,730 --> 00:52:14,864
And they wanna make a movie
with jack and I.
1034
00:52:14,866 --> 00:52:16,899
That's fantastic.
I know.
1035
00:52:16,901 --> 00:52:18,501
I'd love to have you
involved in some way.
1036
00:52:18,503 --> 00:52:20,336
Me?
Of course.
1037
00:52:20,338 --> 00:52:23,472
It's been too long since you
and I have created art together.
1038
00:52:23,474 --> 00:52:25,407
When did you two
ever make art together?
1039
00:52:25,409 --> 00:52:26,709
My painting.
1040
00:52:26,711 --> 00:52:29,211
Don't you remember
I sat for that?
1041
00:52:29,213 --> 00:52:30,579
Ugh. Yes.
1042
00:52:30,581 --> 00:52:32,181
Great things are happening.
1043
00:52:32,183 --> 00:52:33,883
Sobriety has worked wonders
with your life.
1044
00:52:33,885 --> 00:52:36,385
Excuse me. Am I invisible?
1045
00:52:36,387 --> 00:52:40,723
Your beautiful sober son
just put me in a porn video
without my permission.
1046
00:52:40,725 --> 00:52:43,192
Oh, stop it. There is nothing
in that video that earn it
1047
00:52:43,194 --> 00:52:45,227
The title of porn
and you know it.
1048
00:52:45,229 --> 00:52:48,464
You watched it?!
You showed it to mom?
1049
00:52:48,466 --> 00:52:50,599
You showed it to dad.
To help get it down!
1050
00:52:50,601 --> 00:52:52,701
Mom, why would you watch that?
1051
00:52:52,703 --> 00:52:54,170
I watch all of bruce's films.
1052
00:52:54,172 --> 00:52:55,704
Besides,
there is nothing wrong
1053
00:52:55,706 --> 00:52:58,174
With a mother seeing
her son's penis in repose.
1054
00:52:58,176 --> 00:53:02,411
Had you gotten aroused,
I would've stopped watching.
1055
00:53:02,413 --> 00:53:05,614
Can we stop talking about this?
I am seeing a judge tomorrow.
1056
00:53:05,616 --> 00:53:08,284
And all of this
is gonna be behind us.
1057
00:53:08,286 --> 00:53:09,685
Stop being
such a drama queen.
1058
00:53:09,687 --> 00:53:12,254
Mom, I'm on a web site
where people fuck fruit.
1059
00:53:12,256 --> 00:53:13,923
It is not people, it is one man,
and it's very funny.
1060
00:53:13,925 --> 00:53:15,558
And don't talk
with your mouth full.
1061
00:53:15,560 --> 00:53:18,627
Oh, my god. Please be poison.
1062
00:53:18,629 --> 00:53:20,396
When did he become
such a prude?
1063
00:53:20,398 --> 00:53:21,630
Yeah, you know,
I hate to say it,
1064
00:53:21,632 --> 00:53:23,332
But I think I agree
with her on this one.
1065
00:53:23,334 --> 00:53:24,900
I mean, what was the point
of your mother and I having sex
1066
00:53:24,902 --> 00:53:27,803
With the door open
if we were raising a puritan?
1067
00:53:27,805 --> 00:53:29,405
( all laugh )
dad?
1068
00:53:29,407 --> 00:53:30,673
Thank you, my darling.
1069
00:53:30,675 --> 00:53:32,675
( phone rings )
1070
00:53:32,677 --> 00:53:34,276
May I be excused?
1071
00:53:34,278 --> 00:53:36,879
Oh, look who's
finally being polite.
1072
00:53:36,881 --> 00:53:40,216
You know, some nights
I really miss the sound
of you guys making love.
1073
00:53:40,218 --> 00:53:42,251
Yeah, me, too.
1074
00:53:42,253 --> 00:53:44,620
Lassie: I'm so sorry.
I didn't know who else to call.
1075
00:53:44,622 --> 00:53:45,854
What is going on?
1076
00:53:45,856 --> 00:53:47,723
( gunshot )
I swear to god,
1077
00:53:47,725 --> 00:53:49,992
If you fire one more shot,
I'll fucking kill you!
1078
00:53:49,994 --> 00:53:51,994
My fiancé!
1079
00:53:51,996 --> 00:53:54,463
( gunshots )
my fiancé called him
and told him everything!
1080
00:53:54,465 --> 00:53:56,465
I have no idea
what he was thinking!
1081
00:53:56,467 --> 00:53:59,602
So of course
my dad just totally flips out
and he goes to grab his gun!
1082
00:53:59,604 --> 00:54:01,670
So I just locked him
in there in the shed!
1083
00:54:01,672 --> 00:54:05,374
And is this a normal reaction
to a situation like this?
1084
00:54:05,376 --> 00:54:08,611
He's freakishly
protective of me
in his own weird way.
1085
00:54:08,613 --> 00:54:10,913
Jack!
Hey, buddy, it's bruce!
1086
00:54:10,915 --> 00:54:13,015
Jack: Stay out of this!
1087
00:54:13,017 --> 00:54:17,920
I'm gonna open the door,
but you have to give me
your gun.
1088
00:54:17,922 --> 00:54:19,455
No!
The thing is, jack,
it's really not cool
1089
00:54:19,457 --> 00:54:21,890
To shoot people anymore.
1090
00:54:21,892 --> 00:54:24,026
It's illegal.
1091
00:54:24,028 --> 00:54:27,496
Besides, I've got
really good news.
What news?
1092
00:54:27,498 --> 00:54:30,466
I am opening the door.
1093
00:54:31,401 --> 00:54:32,601
Oh, my god.
1094
00:54:32,603 --> 00:54:34,603
Give me the gun.
1095
00:54:34,605 --> 00:54:36,372
What's the news?
1096
00:54:36,374 --> 00:54:38,607
I got us producers. Yeah.
Oh, really?! You did?!
1097
00:54:38,609 --> 00:54:40,943
Why don't you just take drugs?
Just take drugs again.
1098
00:54:40,945 --> 00:54:42,544
Why would you say that?
1099
00:54:42,546 --> 00:54:44,380
Because you are just as bad--
1100
00:54:44,382 --> 00:54:46,282
You're worse, actually,
when you're sober.
1101
00:54:46,284 --> 00:54:49,051
So please, I am begging you
to take drugs, jack.
1102
00:54:49,053 --> 00:54:55,057
First of all, I don't think
you should be calling me jack.
1103
00:54:55,059 --> 00:54:58,494
I think you call me dad.
1104
00:55:02,966 --> 00:55:04,967
Hey.
1105
00:55:04,969 --> 00:55:06,502
Hi.
1106
00:55:08,571 --> 00:55:09,905
You okay?
1107
00:55:19,449 --> 00:55:21,383
You sure you're okay?
1108
00:55:32,862 --> 00:55:36,098
Sorry if I'm giving you
mixed messages.
1109
00:55:36,100 --> 00:55:38,701
I don't really think
that it takes a genius
1110
00:55:38,703 --> 00:55:43,706
To figure out why
I'm a little bit...
Confused.
1111
00:55:45,475 --> 00:55:48,510
I think we're all
a little bit confused.
1112
00:55:48,512 --> 00:55:51,547
Thanks for being
a good guy.
1113
00:55:51,549 --> 00:55:53,015
I'm really not.
1114
00:55:53,017 --> 00:55:54,683
No, you really are.
1115
00:55:57,921 --> 00:56:00,656
What do you mean, the judge
thinks we should leave it up?
1116
00:56:00,658 --> 00:56:03,525
Well, apparently,
these gossip websites
bribe clerks
1117
00:56:03,527 --> 00:56:05,794
To alert them when people
get down sex tapes,
1118
00:56:05,796 --> 00:56:07,529
In case there's
a celebrity involved.
1119
00:56:07,531 --> 00:56:09,031
Anyway, lassie
is a celebrity's kid,
1120
00:56:09,033 --> 00:56:10,799
And there's only
48 hours left,
1121
00:56:10,801 --> 00:56:13,535
So the judge thinks
it's just not worth the risk.
1122
00:56:13,537 --> 00:56:15,537
Okay, you know what?
Fuck it.
1123
00:56:15,539 --> 00:56:17,806
Hey, mom. Can I borrow
one of dad's ties?
1124
00:56:17,808 --> 00:56:19,875
I got my meeting
with the producers
and I wanna look fancy.
1125
00:56:19,877 --> 00:56:21,744
Oh, of course you can.
Where are you going?
1126
00:56:21,746 --> 00:56:23,679
I'm doing what
I should've done
from the very beginning.
1127
00:56:23,681 --> 00:56:25,447
I'm telling lassie.
1128
00:56:25,449 --> 00:56:27,616
Why?
The judge can't
get down the sex tape.
1129
00:56:27,618 --> 00:56:28,951
What? No, wait--
1130
00:56:28,953 --> 00:56:30,819
I'm not asking your permission.
1131
00:56:30,821 --> 00:56:32,388
No, I told you, man.
She's never gonna see it.
1132
00:56:32,390 --> 00:56:34,723
I'm telling lassie
and going home.
1133
00:56:36,092 --> 00:56:38,761
Can you believe that pussy
came from your pussy?
1134
00:56:38,763 --> 00:56:41,029
What about phil?
Maybe he can help.
1135
00:56:41,031 --> 00:56:44,032
Who's phil?
Phil...
1136
00:56:44,034 --> 00:56:45,634
I love you, mom.
1137
00:56:45,636 --> 00:56:47,169
( chuckles )
1138
00:56:47,171 --> 00:56:49,171
His cell mate from prison.
1139
00:56:49,173 --> 00:56:51,173
The guy who eats rats?
1140
00:56:51,175 --> 00:56:52,941
Don't be so negative!
1141
00:56:52,943 --> 00:56:54,610
He hacked into a bank
and got 20 million dollars.
1142
00:56:54,612 --> 00:56:56,879
He's not just some guy
that eats rats.
1143
00:56:56,881 --> 00:56:59,915
Hey, phil, it's bruce.
Long time, man.
1144
00:56:59,917 --> 00:57:01,950
I'm actually just calling
'cause I need a favor.
1145
00:57:01,952 --> 00:57:04,420
( whispering )
he's talking to his friend,
the ex-con. He eats rats.
1146
00:57:04,422 --> 00:57:06,889
Don't tell mother
I told you.
1147
00:57:06,891 --> 00:57:08,657
Yeah, is it okay
if I send over my brother?
1148
00:57:08,659 --> 00:57:11,460
What?! I'm not going!
He's a computer whiz!
1149
00:57:11,462 --> 00:57:12,928
He can get the sex tape
off the internet!
1150
00:57:12,930 --> 00:57:15,197
He's a rodent-eating
ex-convict I don't know.
1151
00:57:15,199 --> 00:57:16,665
Hey, we're both coming.
1152
00:57:21,604 --> 00:57:22,938
Hello?
1153
00:57:28,211 --> 00:57:29,678
Hello?
1154
00:57:29,680 --> 00:57:31,013
Phil?
1155
00:57:31,015 --> 00:57:34,483
Hi.
1156
00:57:34,485 --> 00:57:36,752
Um, is phil here?
1157
00:57:40,890 --> 00:57:42,958
( deep voice )
hello, bruce.
1158
00:57:42,960 --> 00:57:44,626
Phil?
1159
00:57:46,830 --> 00:57:48,764
It's phyllis now.
1160
00:57:48,766 --> 00:57:52,935
Oh, my god!
That's weird.
1161
00:57:52,937 --> 00:57:55,904
I'd like
to introduce you to frankie.
1162
00:57:55,906 --> 00:58:00,175
Oh, the brother. Charmed.
1163
00:58:02,078 --> 00:58:03,745
Kiss the hand.
1164
00:58:08,985 --> 00:58:11,253
Mmm.
Oh.
1165
00:58:11,255 --> 00:58:13,522
Come in, boys.
1166
00:58:18,127 --> 00:58:20,696
♪
1167
00:58:20,698 --> 00:58:25,234
( inhaling deeply )
1168
00:58:25,236 --> 00:58:28,103
Oh, no.
I am clean as a whistle.
1169
00:58:28,105 --> 00:58:30,706
I'm impressed.
1170
00:58:30,708 --> 00:58:32,040
( exhales )
1171
00:58:37,847 --> 00:58:40,182
( sighs )
1172
00:58:40,184 --> 00:58:43,185
Oh. No, thanks.
1173
00:58:43,187 --> 00:58:46,522
It's not nice to make
a lady party alone.
1174
00:58:46,524 --> 00:58:49,258
Especially when she's
doing you a favor.
1175
00:58:50,827 --> 00:58:52,561
Right.
1176
00:58:52,563 --> 00:58:54,830
So, uh, phil...
Do you think maybe
1177
00:58:54,832 --> 00:58:56,698
We could get this movie
down off the internet?
1178
00:58:56,700 --> 00:58:57,933
It's phyllis.
1179
00:58:57,935 --> 00:58:59,134
Yes, it is.
1180
00:58:59,136 --> 00:59:02,571
I get so horny
when I smoke pot.
1181
00:59:02,573 --> 00:59:04,172
You, too?
1182
00:59:06,175 --> 00:59:08,644
( exhales )
1183
00:59:08,646 --> 00:59:11,313
You know, I hope you don't
take this the wrong way,
1184
00:59:11,315 --> 00:59:16,318
But I found your film
very healing.
1185
00:59:16,320 --> 00:59:18,921
( sighs ) I've had a lot
of sadness lately.
1186
00:59:18,923 --> 00:59:21,323
A lot of new girls do.
1187
00:59:21,325 --> 00:59:27,062
Grieving the lost phallus,
it's normal.
1188
00:59:27,064 --> 00:59:28,830
It's so normal.
1189
00:59:28,832 --> 00:59:30,832
But I have to tell you,
1190
00:59:30,834 --> 00:59:33,235
When I saw what happened
to you last night,
1191
00:59:33,237 --> 00:59:36,805
Good lord,
I didn't miss my cock one bit.
1192
00:59:36,807 --> 00:59:39,675
Would you like to see it?
1193
00:59:39,677 --> 00:59:40,876
My phallus.
1194
00:59:40,878 --> 00:59:42,144
( chokes )
1195
00:59:42,146 --> 00:59:44,146
I asked if I could keep it.
1196
00:59:44,148 --> 00:59:46,582
I keep it in a jar.
1197
00:59:46,584 --> 00:59:48,116
Well, I mean, not all of it.
1198
00:59:48,118 --> 00:59:50,586
Some of it they had to use
to construct my vagina.
1199
00:59:50,588 --> 00:59:53,622
It's an amazingly
interesting procedure.
1200
00:59:53,624 --> 00:59:57,359
You don't have to go into
all of that for us, phyllis.
1201
00:59:59,028 --> 01:00:02,030
You be nice
to your auntie phyllis...
1202
01:00:02,032 --> 01:00:03,765
You little shit.
1203
01:00:03,767 --> 01:00:05,300
No, no. Frankie didn't...
1204
01:00:05,302 --> 01:00:08,904
Frankie would love to hear
all about your penis operation.
1205
01:00:08,906 --> 01:00:12,107
It's just we're kind of in
a hurry to get the video down.
1206
01:00:12,109 --> 01:00:14,776
( bang )
1207
01:00:14,778 --> 01:00:16,311
Why has no one
asked to see them?!
1208
01:00:16,313 --> 01:00:17,913
Your tits?
1209
01:00:17,915 --> 01:00:19,748
I'd fucking love
to see your tits.
1210
01:00:21,651 --> 01:00:26,855
And how about you, frankie?
Fancy a peek?
1211
01:00:30,193 --> 01:00:32,294
Um...
1212
01:00:32,296 --> 01:00:35,764
Phyllis: I will not help people
who don't support me!
1213
01:00:35,766 --> 01:00:37,766
What is your problem?
What did I do?
1214
01:00:37,768 --> 01:00:40,769
You hesitated!
When someone offers
to show you their tits,
1215
01:00:40,771 --> 01:00:42,304
You don't hesitate, you look!
1216
01:00:42,306 --> 01:00:43,905
Bruce, I don't even
know this guy!
1217
01:00:43,907 --> 01:00:45,173
Why should I
look at his tits?!
1218
01:00:45,175 --> 01:00:46,942
Phyllis:
Her! Motherfucker!
1219
01:00:46,944 --> 01:00:50,145
That's it.
I'm done helping you.
Bruce!
1220
01:00:50,147 --> 01:00:53,682
I'm not gonna be late
for my meeting to watch you
abuse my lady friends, frank.
1221
01:00:53,684 --> 01:00:55,183
Bruce, I'm sorry!
1222
01:00:55,185 --> 01:00:56,685
Don't say it to me!
1223
01:00:56,687 --> 01:00:57,953
( car door shuts )
1224
01:00:57,955 --> 01:00:59,755
( engine starts )
1225
01:01:06,696 --> 01:01:08,096
Phyllis?
1226
01:01:08,098 --> 01:01:10,365
It's me again.
1227
01:01:10,367 --> 01:01:14,670
♪
1228
01:01:14,672 --> 01:01:18,940
♪ when you look at me
1229
01:01:18,942 --> 01:01:22,077
♪ or when you think of me
1230
01:01:22,079 --> 01:01:24,346
♪ don't scold me
1231
01:01:24,348 --> 01:01:27,349
♪ but understand
1232
01:01:27,351 --> 01:01:29,217
♪ I don't know everything
1233
01:01:29,219 --> 01:01:34,256
You're a very good dancer,
frank. ( chuckles )
1234
01:01:34,258 --> 01:01:40,028
♪ I'm just a man
1235
01:01:40,030 --> 01:01:42,764
♪ when I look at you
1236
01:01:42,766 --> 01:01:47,169
Listen, I would
really like to...
1237
01:01:47,171 --> 01:01:49,438
But I'm actually seeing
someone right now,
1238
01:01:49,440 --> 01:01:52,240
And I'm kind of
old-fashioned that way.
1239
01:01:54,911 --> 01:01:57,179
Please don't be mad.
1240
01:01:57,181 --> 01:01:59,314
She's a very lucky girl.
1241
01:01:59,316 --> 01:02:04,786
So... Do you think you could...
( exhales )
1242
01:02:04,788 --> 01:02:08,190
Maybe help with the sex tape?
1243
01:02:10,460 --> 01:02:14,196
Well... ( inhales )
1244
01:02:14,198 --> 01:02:16,798
Since you
couldn't get it up,
1245
01:02:16,800 --> 01:02:18,800
I may as well get it down.
1246
01:02:18,802 --> 01:02:23,138
( both laugh )
1247
01:02:24,307 --> 01:02:26,942
Let's see what we have here.
1248
01:02:26,944 --> 01:02:29,778
I really appreciate it,
phyllis.
1249
01:02:29,780 --> 01:02:34,049
You know...
1250
01:02:34,051 --> 01:02:36,318
There is something
you could can help me with.
1251
01:02:36,320 --> 01:02:42,924
Anything.
I have this date tonight, and I
really, really like this lady.
1252
01:02:42,926 --> 01:02:45,761
I think I might be a lesbian.
You don't have any problem
with that, right?
1253
01:02:45,763 --> 01:02:47,162
No.
1254
01:02:47,164 --> 01:02:49,498
Well, I got waxed
for the very first time.
1255
01:02:49,500 --> 01:02:51,233
You know...
1256
01:02:51,235 --> 01:02:52,834
Down there.
1257
01:02:52,836 --> 01:02:55,370
( gulps ) mm-hmm.
1258
01:02:55,372 --> 01:02:57,439
At the end of the day,
I went with the brazilian.
1259
01:02:57,441 --> 01:03:00,842
And, god, I hope
I didn't make a mistake.
1260
01:03:00,844 --> 01:03:02,444
I just want everything
to be pretty.
1261
01:03:06,516 --> 01:03:08,884
Would you like...
1262
01:03:08,886 --> 01:03:11,052
Would you like me
to take a look?
1263
01:03:11,054 --> 01:03:13,121
Oh...
1264
01:03:13,123 --> 01:03:14,389
Would you?
1265
01:03:14,391 --> 01:03:16,391
Yep.
1266
01:03:16,393 --> 01:03:17,926
Okay.
1267
01:03:26,536 --> 01:03:29,271
Natalie: Mmm.
1268
01:03:29,273 --> 01:03:33,542
Oh, lord,
again we thank you so much
1269
01:03:33,544 --> 01:03:36,077
For jack and for bruce.
1270
01:03:36,079 --> 01:03:39,481
In your name we pray. Amen.
1271
01:03:39,483 --> 01:03:42,217
All: Amen.
1272
01:03:42,219 --> 01:03:44,219
Good, good.
1273
01:03:44,221 --> 01:03:46,888
Thank you. Thank you.
1274
01:03:46,890 --> 01:03:53,528
And we also wanted to talk
to the two of you about, um...
1275
01:03:53,530 --> 01:03:55,897
Sex.
Yeah!
1276
01:03:57,300 --> 01:03:59,167
Uh-huh.
1277
01:03:59,169 --> 01:04:03,171
Well, you see,
my wife and I, we're celibates.
1278
01:04:03,173 --> 01:04:05,307
Shut up.
1279
01:04:05,309 --> 01:04:08,176
We've taken
a lifelong vow of chastity.
Oh, my god.
1280
01:04:08,178 --> 01:04:10,912
Oh, we don't expect you
to live a similar lifestyle.
1281
01:04:10,914 --> 01:04:12,113
Oh.
Oh, dear no.
1282
01:04:12,115 --> 01:04:13,982
We could never.
No.
1283
01:04:13,984 --> 01:04:20,856
But we do feel very strongly
about our films being sex-free.
1284
01:04:20,858 --> 01:04:22,858
Sex-free?
1285
01:04:22,860 --> 01:04:24,259
Yes.
( groans )
1286
01:04:24,261 --> 01:04:26,127
You want a film
with no sex in it?
1287
01:04:26,129 --> 01:04:27,996
Correct.
Yes.
1288
01:04:27,998 --> 01:04:30,599
Lots of angels.
Zero sex.
1289
01:04:30,601 --> 01:04:32,467
Is that going to be a problem?
1290
01:04:32,469 --> 01:04:36,404
Maybe.
No.
1291
01:04:51,621 --> 01:04:54,623
Phyllis!
1292
01:04:54,625 --> 01:04:58,059
Oh, I love you, phyllis.
1293
01:05:05,167 --> 01:05:09,170
Lassie: Look at us.
We're on regular date,
like regular people.
1294
01:05:09,172 --> 01:05:12,040
It's nice.
It's a miracle.
1295
01:05:12,042 --> 01:05:15,043
When do I get
to read your book?
Because I kinda want to.
1296
01:05:15,045 --> 01:05:19,648
Probably never.
I'm pretty sure it sucks.
1297
01:05:19,650 --> 01:05:21,249
I'm pretty sure
it sucks, too,
1298
01:05:21,251 --> 01:05:23,518
But I still
wanna read it.
1299
01:05:23,520 --> 01:05:25,987
I won't judge you.
1300
01:05:25,989 --> 01:05:28,123
Maybe the next one.
1301
01:05:28,125 --> 01:05:30,258
Excuse me.
1302
01:05:30,260 --> 01:05:32,260
Hey, it's you.
1303
01:05:32,262 --> 01:05:34,062
Love the video, dude.
Fuckin' hysterical.
1304
01:05:34,064 --> 01:05:35,263
Sorry, this happens
all the time.
1305
01:05:35,265 --> 01:05:37,098
Seriously, seriously.
1306
01:05:37,100 --> 01:05:39,067
It's the funniest thing
I've ever seen in my life.
1307
01:05:39,069 --> 01:05:41,603
You know it got
like a million hits
in three hours today?
1308
01:05:41,605 --> 01:05:43,605
Awesome. Fuck off.
You know? Thanks.
Yeah, fuck off.
1309
01:05:43,607 --> 01:05:45,473
Oh, it's her!
My god.
1310
01:05:45,475 --> 01:05:48,009
I do not know how
you handle that shit.
1311
01:05:48,011 --> 01:05:52,414
Eat my bra! Mmm! Mmm! Mmm!
Eat my bra! Yeah!
1312
01:05:52,416 --> 01:05:54,149
What did he say?
I don't know.
1313
01:05:54,151 --> 01:05:56,217
I don't think
he was talking to us.
1314
01:06:02,425 --> 01:06:04,192
What?
1315
01:06:14,170 --> 01:06:17,372
Lassie: We could act out
your masturbation fantasies.
1316
01:06:17,374 --> 01:06:19,708
Maybe that would get you hard.
1317
01:06:19,710 --> 01:06:24,312
Someone must've pirated a copy
off the original site before
I shut it down.
1318
01:06:24,314 --> 01:06:26,181
I'll be a cheerleader
1319
01:06:26,183 --> 01:06:29,451
And you be the captain
of the football team.
1320
01:06:29,453 --> 01:06:32,153
Maybe you just need
some kind of encouragement.
1321
01:06:32,155 --> 01:06:35,390
I'll cheer you on.
I'll cheer you on.
I'll cheer you on.
1322
01:06:44,734 --> 01:06:48,737
Please get it down, phyllis.
I'll do whatever you want.
1323
01:06:48,739 --> 01:06:52,073
We can dance.
I'll look at your penis.
1324
01:06:52,075 --> 01:06:53,475
Frank...
Get the jar.
Does it open?
1325
01:06:53,477 --> 01:06:55,076
Frank! Frank!
I'll touch it!
1326
01:06:55,078 --> 01:06:58,079
Frank, I know how you feel.
1327
01:06:58,081 --> 01:07:01,082
You're embarrassed...
1328
01:07:01,084 --> 01:07:03,084
And you're ashamed...
1329
01:07:03,086 --> 01:07:05,086
And you want to die.
1330
01:07:05,088 --> 01:07:08,623
The exact same way
I felt when the guys
on my high school team
1331
01:07:08,625 --> 01:07:12,093
Walked into the locker room
and I was dressed
in a cheerleader's uniform.
1332
01:07:12,095 --> 01:07:14,763
But it was at that moment
I got a glimpse
1333
01:07:14,765 --> 01:07:18,767
For the first time
of my true me.
1334
01:07:18,769 --> 01:07:22,037
And that is what
I want for you, darling.
1335
01:07:24,673 --> 01:07:31,079
Let your humiliation
set you free.
1336
01:07:31,081 --> 01:07:35,216
Come here. Come here.
1337
01:07:35,218 --> 01:07:39,220
That's a very nice shampoo
you're wearing.
1338
01:07:39,222 --> 01:07:41,222
Oh, now he'll never
work with me.
1339
01:07:41,224 --> 01:07:45,126
Jack? Don't be silly.
He adores you.
1340
01:07:45,128 --> 01:07:47,262
Mom, he tried to shoot a guy
who cheated on his daughter.
1341
01:07:47,264 --> 01:07:49,798
I put her in a sex tape,
which is now being viewed
1342
01:07:49,800 --> 01:07:52,534
By eight million people
since breakfast.
1343
01:07:52,536 --> 01:07:57,205
It's not a real sex tape.
It's just a funny little movie.
1344
01:07:59,275 --> 01:08:00,542
That's it.
What?
1345
01:08:00,544 --> 01:08:02,143
It's a movie!
1346
01:08:02,145 --> 01:08:03,812
I will just tell jack
that what I shot
1347
01:08:03,814 --> 01:08:08,316
In the clubhouse
was a teaser for a larger film.
1348
01:08:08,318 --> 01:08:09,818
What's the film?
1349
01:08:09,820 --> 01:08:11,786
I'll work that out!
It writes itself!
1350
01:08:17,193 --> 01:08:19,160
Hi.
Hey.
1351
01:08:19,162 --> 01:08:20,728
I'm so glad that you called.
1352
01:08:20,730 --> 01:08:25,200
My dad is at a meeting,
but I ordered us some dinner.
1353
01:08:25,202 --> 01:08:28,670
So I hope you're hungry.
1354
01:08:33,476 --> 01:08:36,211
Here. Sit.
1355
01:08:36,213 --> 01:08:39,347
I actually have
something to tell you.
1356
01:08:39,349 --> 01:08:42,617
It's kind of the reason
we're having chinese food.
1357
01:08:42,619 --> 01:08:44,819
You're going to china?
1358
01:08:46,755 --> 01:08:49,357
The opposite.
I told them no.
1359
01:08:49,359 --> 01:08:53,561
It's just kind of
the worst time for me to go.
1360
01:08:55,231 --> 01:08:58,266
It might have a tiny
little bit to do with you.
1361
01:09:05,241 --> 01:09:06,708
You all right?
1362
01:09:09,178 --> 01:09:10,778
You do these?
1363
01:09:10,780 --> 01:09:13,781
I was really into knights
when I was a kid.
1364
01:09:13,783 --> 01:09:16,851
"a strong, kind man
dipped in metal."
1365
01:09:16,853 --> 01:09:19,521
Listen, it's actually
a very normal fantasy
1366
01:09:19,523 --> 01:09:24,659
For a girl whose father
has never been in
a relationship, ever.
1367
01:09:24,661 --> 01:09:30,798
You can connect the dots
and see why perhaps I was
in need of some chivalry.
1368
01:09:36,539 --> 01:09:39,707
So... What did you
want to tell me?
1369
01:09:43,279 --> 01:09:45,313
I'll tell you later.
1370
01:10:00,829 --> 01:10:03,398
( phone rings )
1371
01:10:03,400 --> 01:10:04,933
( grunts )
1372
01:10:04,935 --> 01:10:11,406
( phone rings )
1373
01:10:11,408 --> 01:10:13,408
( sighs )
1374
01:10:13,410 --> 01:10:14,842
Hey.
1375
01:10:14,844 --> 01:10:16,444
Thank you
for the date yesterday.
1376
01:10:16,446 --> 01:10:19,547
It was really, really nice...
And normal.
1377
01:10:19,549 --> 01:10:22,951
Listen, lassie,
can I talk to you
about something?
1378
01:10:22,953 --> 01:10:24,619
I'm actually just running
into a meeting right now.
1379
01:10:24,621 --> 01:10:25,987
Can I give you a call back
in a little bit?
1380
01:10:25,989 --> 01:10:27,589
Oh, and your brother,
1381
01:10:27,591 --> 01:10:29,791
He stopped by
and he took your car.
1382
01:10:29,793 --> 01:10:31,793
He said he needed to trade it
for a crane or something.
1383
01:10:31,795 --> 01:10:34,362
I don't know.
He said you'd understand.
1384
01:10:35,698 --> 01:10:36,965
( beeps )
1385
01:10:45,741 --> 01:10:47,675
( sighs )
1386
01:10:48,877 --> 01:10:54,282
Hey, sorry I'm late.
1387
01:10:56,585 --> 01:10:59,454
What's going on?
This is actually a really
fucking horrible time
1388
01:10:59,456 --> 01:11:01,589
For this to be happening to me!
What?
1389
01:11:01,591 --> 01:11:03,725
I just don't--
I don't understand it!
1390
01:11:03,727 --> 01:11:07,629
I don't understand
why nobody will fuck me!
1391
01:11:30,452 --> 01:11:33,721
But everyone else has sex,
why can't we?
1392
01:11:33,723 --> 01:11:35,323
Bruce: "why can't I?"
1393
01:11:35,325 --> 01:11:38,459
Everyone else has sex,
why can't I?
1394
01:11:38,461 --> 01:11:45,733
Behold. I am an angel,
sent by god, to make you pure.
1395
01:11:45,735 --> 01:11:47,735
Bruce:
Dad! I'm gonna need more wings!
1396
01:11:47,737 --> 01:11:50,405
Chris: What?
Bruce: More wings!
1397
01:11:50,407 --> 01:11:52,407
Bruce...
Bruce: Cut, cut!
1398
01:11:52,409 --> 01:11:55,810
Isn't this fucking amazing?
1399
01:11:55,812 --> 01:11:58,746
What is this?
I'm making a movie
of that night.
1400
01:11:58,748 --> 01:12:02,483
What night?
The night
in the clubhouse, bro.
1401
01:12:02,485 --> 01:12:07,422
Okay, everybody, places.
We're going again.
1402
01:12:07,424 --> 01:12:10,825
No, actually not places.
1403
01:12:10,827 --> 01:12:13,828
Could everyone just
pack this stuff up and go home?
1404
01:12:13,830 --> 01:12:16,431
I'm sorry.
Frankie, stop being such a girl!
1405
01:12:16,433 --> 01:12:18,433
Do not disrespect me
in front of my crew, okay?
1406
01:12:18,435 --> 01:12:20,768
I will slap you down.
I will fucking slap you down.
1407
01:12:20,770 --> 01:12:22,904
All I'm doing here is trying
to make everyone else happy.
1408
01:12:22,906 --> 01:12:25,940
The producers want an angel.
Jack won't do the movie
unless dharma is in it.
1409
01:12:25,942 --> 01:12:29,711
Jack is in the movie?!
Of course jack's in the movie!
Jack's the money!
1410
01:12:29,713 --> 01:12:32,714
But he won't do it
unless dharma's in it,
who can't fucking act!
1411
01:12:32,716 --> 01:12:34,382
Stop fighting, both of you!
1412
01:12:34,384 --> 01:12:35,917
And I am doing
all of this, bro,
1413
01:12:35,919 --> 01:12:38,386
Just to make sure
that you and cassie
1414
01:12:38,388 --> 01:12:39,587
Don't get embarrassed.
1415
01:12:39,589 --> 01:12:40,988
Bruce...
What?!
1416
01:12:40,990 --> 01:12:42,623
Isn't jack
supposed to be in this scene?
1417
01:12:42,625 --> 01:12:45,827
Could everybody just stop
talking to me?! Please!
1418
01:12:45,829 --> 01:12:49,931
Okay, we're going again!
Last time! Rolling sound!
1419
01:12:49,933 --> 01:12:51,499
Bruce!
Action!
1420
01:12:51,501 --> 01:12:55,103
Don't listen to the a--
to the angel.
1421
01:12:55,105 --> 01:12:57,538
Have sex. Have sex now.
1422
01:12:57,540 --> 01:12:58,740
Bruce: Angrier!
1423
01:12:58,742 --> 01:13:00,408
Have it all the time!
1424
01:13:02,678 --> 01:13:04,812
Oh, fuck!
1425
01:13:07,883 --> 01:13:11,719
What are you doing here?
Tell me that you didn't know
that he filmed us that night!
1426
01:13:11,721 --> 01:13:14,122
I didn't.
I swear to god, I didn't.
1427
01:13:14,124 --> 01:13:16,157
Well, did you know that
it was on the internet?!
1428
01:13:16,159 --> 01:13:19,160
Bruce: Cut! Places!
We're going again!
1429
01:13:19,162 --> 01:13:20,962
Oh, my god.
1430
01:13:20,964 --> 01:13:23,464
Action.
Oh.
1431
01:13:23,466 --> 01:13:25,600
Why won't anyone
have sex with me?
1432
01:13:25,602 --> 01:13:26,868
Wait...
1433
01:13:26,870 --> 01:13:29,137
Is that an angel?
1434
01:13:29,139 --> 01:13:33,074
I forbid the blood
to enter your cock.
1435
01:13:33,076 --> 01:13:35,676
Rise, pes--
penis, rise!
1436
01:13:35,678 --> 01:13:37,678
Bruce, could you have her
say "phallus" instead?
1437
01:13:37,680 --> 01:13:39,013
What is all of this?
1438
01:13:39,015 --> 01:13:41,149
Fill with blood!
Fill that member!
1439
01:13:41,151 --> 01:13:43,684
Bruce is making a movie
so... ( sighs )
1440
01:13:43,686 --> 01:13:45,420
So that we won't
have to be embarrassed.
1441
01:13:45,422 --> 01:13:46,687
What are you talking about?
1442
01:13:46,689 --> 01:13:50,525
Sex out of wedlock is wrong.
1443
01:13:50,527 --> 01:13:52,026
Get that member
filled with pleasure!
1444
01:13:52,028 --> 01:13:55,830
I forbid the blood
to enter your cock.
1445
01:13:55,832 --> 01:13:57,832
Phallus!
I forbid the blood
to enter your phallus.
1446
01:13:57,834 --> 01:13:59,100
I'm the devil!
Fuck that pussy!
1447
01:13:59,102 --> 01:14:01,569
...To enter your phallus.
1448
01:14:01,571 --> 01:14:04,539
You big penis!
Could she say "organ" instead?
1449
01:14:04,541 --> 01:14:07,175
Motherfucker!
Come here!
1450
01:14:07,177 --> 01:14:11,179
Did you put
my precious daughter
in a porno video?!
1451
01:14:11,181 --> 01:14:13,848
You are fucking dead!
Do you hear me?!
1452
01:14:13,850 --> 01:14:16,083
Oh, shit!
Time to die, motherfucker!
1453
01:14:16,085 --> 01:14:20,121
( gunshot, screams )
1454
01:14:20,123 --> 01:14:22,857
Bruce! Bruce!
1455
01:14:22,859 --> 01:14:25,126
Fuck! Okay, okay.
1456
01:14:25,128 --> 01:14:27,595
Someone call an ambulance!
Call 911! Call 911!
1457
01:14:27,597 --> 01:14:29,997
He shot me in my belly.
I know, bro. I know.
1458
01:14:29,999 --> 01:14:31,799
Just keep breathing.
Just keep breathing.
1459
01:14:31,801 --> 01:14:34,202
( groans )
just keep breathing.
1460
01:14:34,204 --> 01:14:37,805
( chuckles )
I knew you loved me, bro.
1461
01:14:37,807 --> 01:14:41,609
You! When you grab me
and put me against the wall,
you gotta really hold me!
1462
01:14:41,611 --> 01:14:44,045
You wanna go again, jack?
Let's go!
1463
01:14:44,047 --> 01:14:45,813
He doesn't know anything.
1464
01:14:45,815 --> 01:14:47,648
He just thinks that
he's playing the part
of a father
1465
01:14:47,650 --> 01:14:51,052
Who found out his daughter's
in a sex video. It's fine.
1466
01:14:51,054 --> 01:14:53,754
You're such a fucking asshole!
1467
01:14:53,756 --> 01:14:55,890
What?
What's the matter with you?!
1468
01:14:55,892 --> 01:14:58,759
I just want an option
in case we decide to go dark
in the end, bro.
1469
01:14:58,761 --> 01:15:00,495
Lassie, I'm sorry.
Leave me alone.
1470
01:15:00,497 --> 01:15:02,230
Lassie--
leave me alone!
1471
01:15:04,032 --> 01:15:06,067
But it looked
that realistic?
1472
01:15:20,782 --> 01:15:24,185
♪ hold on to hope, love
1473
01:15:24,187 --> 01:15:28,923
♪ I searched high and low
for you ♪
1474
01:15:28,925 --> 01:15:31,192
( phone rings )
1475
01:15:31,194 --> 01:15:34,795
♪ for you
1476
01:15:34,797 --> 01:15:38,933
♪ each day gets closer
1477
01:15:38,935 --> 01:15:42,670
♪ so hold on stronger
to me ♪
1478
01:15:42,672 --> 01:15:47,942
( phone rings )
1479
01:15:47,944 --> 01:15:50,011
( grunts )
1480
01:15:50,013 --> 01:15:53,614
♪ someday soon
1481
01:15:53,616 --> 01:15:56,317
♪ I'll find you
1482
01:15:56,319 --> 01:15:57,785
( phone rings )
1483
01:15:57,787 --> 01:16:00,922
♪ someday soon
1484
01:16:00,924 --> 01:16:04,325
♪ I'll know you
1485
01:16:04,327 --> 01:16:09,330
♪ someday, ooh
1486
01:16:09,332 --> 01:16:12,700
♪ yeah, oh
1487
01:16:12,702 --> 01:16:18,973
( phone rings )
1488
01:16:18,975 --> 01:16:21,809
Mom, stop fucking calling!
1489
01:16:21,811 --> 01:16:23,344
It's not your mother.
1490
01:16:23,346 --> 01:16:28,049
Unfortunately,
I can't bear children.
1491
01:16:28,051 --> 01:16:29,650
Whatever.
1492
01:16:29,652 --> 01:16:31,919
I saw bruce's movie,
along with,
1493
01:16:31,921 --> 01:16:34,989
Oh, I don't know,
a few million other people.
1494
01:16:34,991 --> 01:16:37,592
And what the fuck
was he thinking,
not letting me play the angel?
1495
01:16:37,594 --> 01:16:40,595
That woman
was absolute dog shit.
1496
01:16:40,597 --> 01:16:43,130
So, you still talk to that girl?
1497
01:16:43,132 --> 01:16:44,865
She still mad at you?
1498
01:16:44,867 --> 01:16:46,867
She won't take my calls.
1499
01:16:46,869 --> 01:16:49,704
She hasn't respond
to any of my emails.
1500
01:16:49,706 --> 01:16:53,007
Yeah, I heard
through the grapevine
that she's going away.
1501
01:16:53,009 --> 01:16:55,009
Poor thing.
Where?
1502
01:16:55,011 --> 01:16:57,945
China.
1503
01:16:57,947 --> 01:16:59,347
You think you're embarrassed?
1504
01:16:59,349 --> 01:17:00,982
Try havin' half the planet
watch some guy
1505
01:17:00,984 --> 01:17:03,751
Not be able to fuck you
all night.
1506
01:17:03,753 --> 01:17:06,854
That's embarrassing, my friend.
1507
01:17:06,856 --> 01:17:08,689
Anyway...
1508
01:17:08,691 --> 01:17:11,025
I thought you should know
she's going away...
1509
01:17:11,027 --> 01:17:13,894
Just in case one of the people
on this phone call
1510
01:17:13,896 --> 01:17:16,631
Wanted to start
acting like a man, darling.
1511
01:17:16,633 --> 01:17:18,766
Let your auntie phyllis
1512
01:17:18,768 --> 01:17:20,768
Give you a piece of advice,
frankie-baby.
1513
01:17:20,770 --> 01:17:24,305
I don't give a shit
how many people
1514
01:17:24,307 --> 01:17:26,307
Saw what happened
in that clubhouse that night,
1515
01:17:26,309 --> 01:17:28,309
And I don't care
what they thought about it.
1516
01:17:28,311 --> 01:17:31,912
They weren't there.
They were just watching.
1517
01:17:34,383 --> 01:17:37,852
If you really fell in love
with that girl that night,
1518
01:17:37,854 --> 01:17:41,188
Then what the fuck are you
still doing in the desert?
1519
01:17:49,164 --> 01:17:50,831
( horn honks )
1520
01:17:53,068 --> 01:17:54,902
( horn honks )
1521
01:17:59,241 --> 01:18:00,841
Francis...
1522
01:18:04,212 --> 01:18:05,813
Hey, bro.
1523
01:18:05,815 --> 01:18:07,148
( car door shuts )
1524
01:18:11,119 --> 01:18:15,122
Listen, I know
we haven't talked since
the whole angel debacle,
1525
01:18:15,124 --> 01:18:17,391
And I just wanted
to say I'm really sorry.
1526
01:18:17,393 --> 01:18:19,393
After you left,
I got to thinking...
1527
01:18:19,395 --> 01:18:21,762
Maybe I'm incapable of change.
1528
01:18:21,764 --> 01:18:23,230
But, look, no camera.
1529
01:18:23,232 --> 01:18:25,399
Wow, I'm impressed.
Right?
1530
01:18:25,401 --> 01:18:27,001
You proud of me?
1531
01:18:27,003 --> 01:18:29,737
What time's her flight?
Uh, 7:00 pm.
1532
01:18:29,739 --> 01:18:32,073
We better hit the road
before we lose the light.
1533
01:18:36,011 --> 01:18:38,279
Hey, bruce,
can you help me
with something in here?
1534
01:18:38,281 --> 01:18:39,780
Sure.
1535
01:18:42,350 --> 01:18:44,418
You need a strong guy?
Yeah.
1536
01:18:45,721 --> 01:18:47,988
What is it?
1537
01:18:47,990 --> 01:18:50,257
Frank! What are you doing?!
1538
01:18:50,259 --> 01:18:52,259
You're not filming this, bruce!
1539
01:18:52,261 --> 01:18:54,128
What?!
1540
01:18:54,130 --> 01:18:56,297
Plenty of food
and water in there!
1541
01:18:56,299 --> 01:18:58,933
There's even a mirror
in case you wanna jerk off!
1542
01:18:58,935 --> 01:19:00,935
Tv gets channel six!
1543
01:19:00,937 --> 01:19:05,206
I swear on mom's tits,
I'm not gonna film you!
1544
01:19:05,208 --> 01:19:07,742
Okay, maybe one shot!
1545
01:19:07,744 --> 01:19:13,047
Bruce: Maybe two!
A master from far away!
1546
01:19:13,049 --> 01:19:19,053
Bro, I just want to give you
a happy ending!
1547
01:19:19,055 --> 01:19:22,790
Frank! I love you!
1548
01:19:22,792 --> 01:19:27,061
♪ I know the nervous walking
1549
01:19:27,063 --> 01:19:30,197
♪ I know the dirty beard
1550
01:19:30,199 --> 01:19:34,935
♪ hangs out
by the boxcar waiting ♪
1551
01:19:34,937 --> 01:19:39,473
♪ take me away
to nowhere plains ♪
1552
01:19:39,475 --> 01:19:41,942
♪ there is a wait so long
1553
01:19:41,944 --> 01:19:44,345
♪ so long, so long
1554
01:19:44,347 --> 01:19:50,518
♪ never wait so long
1555
01:19:52,220 --> 01:19:56,023
Hey!
Dad! Tell us
when people come in!
1556
01:19:56,025 --> 01:19:59,426
♪ here comes your man
1557
01:19:59,428 --> 01:20:01,495
Excuse me?
1558
01:20:01,497 --> 01:20:04,565
♪ here comes your man
1559
01:20:04,567 --> 01:20:06,834
♪ here comes your man
1560
01:20:23,585 --> 01:20:28,889
I am a strong, kind man
dipped in metal.
1561
01:20:28,891 --> 01:20:32,326
Dipped in metal.
1562
01:20:32,328 --> 01:20:35,496
And I have come to take you
away from all of this...
1563
01:20:35,498 --> 01:20:40,067
And to protect you
and to defend you...
1564
01:20:40,069 --> 01:20:43,404
And to apologize
for sucking at it so far.
1565
01:20:43,406 --> 01:20:46,941
Lassie, I know
all about embarrassment.
1566
01:20:46,943 --> 01:20:50,477
Eighteen million people saw me
throw up on my fiancée,
1567
01:20:50,479 --> 01:20:54,281
And 35 million people
saw my dick not work.
1568
01:20:54,283 --> 01:20:57,618
I'm standing in front of you
wearing a car.
1569
01:20:57,620 --> 01:21:00,888
Don't go.
It won't help.
1570
01:21:04,893 --> 01:21:07,895
Frank...
1571
01:21:07,897 --> 01:21:13,067
I really appreciate
all of this effort.
I just...
1572
01:21:15,570 --> 01:21:20,507
I can't live here anymore.
I have to go.
1573
01:21:22,177 --> 01:21:23,978
I'm sorry.
1574
01:21:55,210 --> 01:21:56,577
Come?
1575
01:21:58,079 --> 01:21:59,380
Come and visit me.
1576
01:22:01,116 --> 01:22:03,918
I could probably
use a knight.
1577
01:22:08,623 --> 01:22:13,160
I might have a little trouble
with the metal detector.
1578
01:22:13,162 --> 01:22:15,229
♪
1579
01:22:23,505 --> 01:22:26,507
( cheering and applause )
1580
01:22:26,509 --> 01:22:28,242
( record scratches )
1581
01:22:28,244 --> 01:22:30,311
( music playing in reverse )
1582
01:22:33,515 --> 01:22:35,482
♪
1583
01:22:37,419 --> 01:22:40,654
( bruce's voice )
wow, I've never had sex
with a knight before.
1584
01:22:40,656 --> 01:22:44,058
( bruce's voice )
I'm gonna fuck you
on the round table, bitch.
1585
01:22:46,995 --> 01:22:49,063
Bruce: Cut!
1586
01:22:50,999 --> 01:22:53,067
♪
1587
01:24:19,621 --> 01:24:21,688
♪
1588
01:24:37,505 --> 01:24:39,506
( inhales deeply )
1589
01:24:39,508 --> 01:24:42,109
( exhales )
1590
01:24:42,111 --> 01:24:44,178
Ahh.
1591
01:24:47,248 --> 01:24:50,117
Ahh.
1592
01:24:50,119 --> 01:24:52,719
Felt real to me.
1593
01:24:56,157 --> 01:24:57,624
Mmm.
1594
01:24:59,794 --> 01:25:02,596
♪
1595
01:25:06,835 --> 01:25:10,304
♪ picture they took of you
in your cowboy hat ♪
1596
01:25:10,306 --> 01:25:12,706
♪ makes you look like
you are one of the boys ♪
1597
01:25:12,708 --> 01:25:14,842
♪ out on a Saturday night
1598
01:25:14,844 --> 01:25:17,711
♪ meanwhile on the outside
of the dance hall ♪
1599
01:25:17,713 --> 01:25:21,181
♪ I'm a joke
that you'd probably enjoy ♪
1600
01:25:21,183 --> 01:25:25,185
♪ on the outside of memphis
all the building look big ♪
1601
01:25:25,187 --> 01:25:26,854
♪ and the white picket fences
1602
01:25:26,856 --> 01:25:28,856
♪ all dare to charge
around the lawn ♪
1603
01:25:28,858 --> 01:25:30,491
♪ and hold their heads
up high ♪
1604
01:25:30,493 --> 01:25:32,359
♪ when my headlights
find them out ♪
1605
01:25:32,361 --> 01:25:34,862
♪ they'll be the first
to put their hands in the air ♪
1606
01:25:34,864 --> 01:25:38,599
♪ with my radio on
1607
01:25:38,601 --> 01:25:41,869
♪ singing a country song
1608
01:25:41,871 --> 01:25:44,138
♪ soft and low
1609
01:25:49,344 --> 01:25:52,746
♪ living on the edge
of the city limit line ♪
1610
01:25:52,748 --> 01:25:55,349
♪ this is where the boundary
finally ends ♪
1611
01:25:55,351 --> 01:25:58,352
♪ and I swear that we're
the last living souls ♪
1612
01:25:58,354 --> 01:26:00,354
♪ in a populated ghost town
1613
01:26:00,356 --> 01:26:03,891
♪ all the billboards
are our best friends ♪
1614
01:26:03,893 --> 01:26:06,493
♪ oh, which way
did our last chance go? ♪
1615
01:26:06,495 --> 01:26:10,230
♪ and can we get out
if we go right now? ♪
1616
01:26:10,232 --> 01:26:12,232
♪ 'cause it seems
that with the malls ♪
1617
01:26:12,234 --> 01:26:14,768
♪ and the mega-church stadiums
1618
01:26:14,770 --> 01:26:17,504
♪ we would get out
if we knew just how ♪
1619
01:26:17,506 --> 01:26:21,241
♪ with the radio on
1620
01:26:21,243 --> 01:26:24,511
♪ singin' a country song
1621
01:26:24,513 --> 01:26:26,580
♪ soft and low
1622
01:26:28,249 --> 01:26:32,786
♪ oh, when I've got
a worried mind
1623
01:26:32,788 --> 01:26:35,789
♪ I know
1624
01:26:35,791 --> 01:26:39,526
♪ I hear the ghost
of patsy cline ♪
1625
01:26:39,528 --> 01:26:46,567
♪ on the grand old opry show
1626
01:27:09,290 --> 01:27:11,959
♪ standing in line
to get my self-help book ♪
1627
01:27:11,961 --> 01:27:16,296
♪ signed off on by the reverend
who shouts to the converted ♪
1628
01:27:16,298 --> 01:27:19,967
♪ have mercy on this boy
he did it all by the book ♪
1629
01:27:19,969 --> 01:27:23,570
♪ but still kind of
has his doubts ♪
1630
01:27:23,572 --> 01:27:27,307
♪ yeah, you look pretty good
in that jonquil dress ♪
1631
01:27:27,309 --> 01:27:29,977
♪ but your smile
is a wooden nickel's pride ♪
1632
01:27:29,979 --> 01:27:32,846
♪ and I know that
it ain't worth much ♪
1633
01:27:32,848 --> 01:27:34,581
♪ but it feels good to touch
1634
01:27:34,583 --> 01:27:37,584
♪ and I think that
I could dance if I tried ♪
1635
01:27:37,586 --> 01:27:40,988
♪ with your radio on
1636
01:27:40,990 --> 01:27:44,458
♪ singin' a country song
1637
01:27:44,460 --> 01:27:46,526
♪ soft and low
1638
01:27:47,996 --> 01:27:52,733
♪ oh, when I've got
a worried mind ♪
1639
01:27:52,735 --> 01:27:55,469
♪ I know
1640
01:27:55,471 --> 01:27:59,006
♪ I hear the ghost
of patsy cline ♪
1641
01:27:59,008 --> 01:28:06,046
♪ on the grand old opry show
119526
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