All language subtitles for Brooklyn Nine-Nine - 05x13 - The Negotiation

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,176 --> 00:00:03,133 Peralta, there was a botched B & E 2 00:00:03,177 --> 00:00:04,439 at a jewelry store on Atlantic 3 00:00:04,482 --> 00:00:06,223 that just turned into a hostage situation. 4 00:00:06,267 --> 00:00:07,790 They want you to be the negotiator. 5 00:00:07,833 --> 00:00:10,140 Oh, my God, my prayers have finally been answered. 6 00:00:10,184 --> 00:00:11,335 You prayed for a hostage situation? 7 00:00:11,359 --> 00:00:13,100 Yes, I did. Every single day. 8 00:00:13,143 --> 00:00:14,686 I don't understand. Why isn't ESU handling this? 9 00:00:14,710 --> 00:00:17,234 Apparently, the hostage-taker asked for Jake by name. 10 00:00:17,278 --> 00:00:19,062 Oh, yes, it's getting even cooler. 11 00:00:19,106 --> 00:00:20,672 Oh, man, I wonder who it is. Ooh! 12 00:00:20,716 --> 00:00:22,520 Maybe it's the brother of someone I put away for life. 13 00:00:22,544 --> 00:00:24,739 Ooh! Or the identical twin of someone I put away for life. 14 00:00:24,763 --> 00:00:26,461 Ooh! Or the fraternal twin of... Jake! 15 00:00:26,504 --> 00:00:27,829 Just get down there! Take Diaz with you. 16 00:00:27,853 --> 00:00:29,377 Yep. Yep, yep, yep. How do I look? 17 00:00:29,420 --> 00:00:31,248 It doesn't matter. Let's go negotiate! 18 00:00:33,511 --> 00:00:35,513 Hey, everyone, I'm here. 19 00:00:35,557 --> 00:00:37,689 I'm Jake Peralta, the negotiator. 20 00:00:37,733 --> 00:00:40,170 The negotiator, yes. 21 00:00:40,214 --> 00:00:42,390 - Who are you? - Dennis Kole, ESU. 22 00:00:42,433 --> 00:00:44,653 This was my crime scene before you bozos got here. 23 00:00:44,696 --> 00:00:46,176 Nice to meet you too, Dennis. 24 00:00:46,220 --> 00:00:48,178 I've spent ten years as a negotiator 25 00:00:48,222 --> 00:00:50,528 and you just took my first hostage situation. 26 00:00:50,572 --> 00:00:53,053 All I've done up till now is talk jumpers off of rooftops. 27 00:00:53,096 --> 00:00:55,316 But that must be satisfying in its own way, right? 28 00:00:55,359 --> 00:00:58,493 Yeah, really satisfying saving a crazy person's life. 29 00:00:58,536 --> 00:01:00,103 Whatever. Here's a little advice. 30 00:01:00,147 --> 00:01:02,105 I don't like you two. Not so much advice 31 00:01:02,149 --> 00:01:04,499 as it is a hurtful statement based on limited interaction. 32 00:01:04,542 --> 00:01:06,805 He wants to talk to you. 33 00:01:06,849 --> 00:01:08,155 Get the hell in there. 34 00:01:08,198 --> 00:01:10,722 Ooh, it says "negotiator" on it. 35 00:01:12,768 --> 00:01:15,205 This is Jake Peralta. 36 00:01:15,249 --> 00:01:17,251 I am unarmed 37 00:01:17,294 --> 00:01:19,731 and I'm approaching the building 38 00:01:19,775 --> 00:01:26,825 ♪ 39 00:01:28,827 --> 00:01:32,135 You wanted to talk to me? Keep those hands in the air. 40 00:01:32,179 --> 00:01:33,876 And wave 'em like you just don't care. 41 00:01:35,356 --> 00:01:36,768 I'm just messing with you, Peralta. 42 00:01:36,792 --> 00:01:38,446 Put your hands down, give me a hug, baby. 43 00:01:38,489 --> 00:01:39,621 Judy! 44 00:01:42,667 --> 00:01:49,761 ♪ 45 00:01:59,641 --> 00:02:01,338 Sergeant, a member of 46 00:02:01,382 --> 00:02:03,186 the Commissioner selection committee is coming in today 47 00:02:03,210 --> 00:02:04,622 to tour the precinct and do some interviews. 48 00:02:04,646 --> 00:02:05,926 Would you mind speaking with her? 49 00:02:05,951 --> 00:02:07,605 Of course. Terry loves answering 50 00:02:07,649 --> 00:02:08,780 the hard questions. 51 00:02:08,824 --> 00:02:10,260 Oh, here she is. 52 00:02:10,304 --> 00:02:11,261 I guess you don't have time to take off 53 00:02:11,305 --> 00:02:12,480 those ridiculous suspenders. 54 00:02:12,523 --> 00:02:14,221 Hello, Miss Sumter. 55 00:02:14,264 --> 00:02:15,570 Hello, Captain. 56 00:02:15,613 --> 00:02:17,156 I'm excited to speak to you subordinates 57 00:02:17,180 --> 00:02:18,636 and learn more about your management style. 58 00:02:18,660 --> 00:02:20,749 I thought you could talk to Sergeant Jeffords here. 59 00:02:20,792 --> 00:02:22,577 Oh, um... 60 00:02:22,620 --> 00:02:24,405 I'd rather not talk to a supervisor. 61 00:02:24,448 --> 00:02:26,407 I was hoping to interview one of your detectives. 62 00:02:26,450 --> 00:02:28,626 Perhaps, um... him? 63 00:02:28,670 --> 00:02:30,237 No! 64 00:02:30,280 --> 00:02:33,544 There was a wasp near me, 65 00:02:33,588 --> 00:02:35,242 which has since disappeared. 66 00:02:35,285 --> 00:02:37,287 You can interview Detective Hitchcock 67 00:02:37,331 --> 00:02:40,334 and I am completely fine with that. 68 00:02:41,509 --> 00:02:42,727 I gotta admit, man. 69 00:02:42,771 --> 00:02:44,599 I thought you'd be happy to see me. 70 00:02:44,642 --> 00:02:46,316 Why you being so weird. Oh, I don't know. 71 00:02:46,340 --> 00:02:47,447 I didn't sleep well last night, 72 00:02:47,471 --> 00:02:48,751 so I'm probably tired from that. 73 00:02:48,777 --> 00:02:50,474 Oh, and also, this is a hostage situation! 74 00:02:50,518 --> 00:02:53,477 Wow! It's like that. 75 00:02:53,521 --> 00:02:55,218 Yes, it's like that. What the hell? 76 00:02:55,262 --> 00:02:56,741 I thought you went straight? I did. 77 00:02:56,785 --> 00:02:58,482 I'm a high-end car broker now. 78 00:02:58,526 --> 00:03:00,446 I procure luxury vehicles for the rich and famous 79 00:03:00,484 --> 00:03:01,746 and I do it legally. 80 00:03:01,790 --> 00:03:03,400 Last week I dropped off a Bugatti 81 00:03:03,444 --> 00:03:04,725 to the kid with the lisp from "Stranger Things." 82 00:03:04,749 --> 00:03:06,577 Was he cool? 83 00:03:06,621 --> 00:03:08,251 Do him and the rest of the gang hang out in real life? 84 00:03:08,275 --> 00:03:09,600 You know what? No. We are not chatting right now. 85 00:03:09,624 --> 00:03:10,842 You have three hostages. 86 00:03:10,886 --> 00:03:12,453 You mean Pam and the two Bobs? 87 00:03:12,496 --> 00:03:14,194 They not hostages. I prefer to call them 88 00:03:14,237 --> 00:03:15,717 "collateral friendships." 89 00:03:15,760 --> 00:03:17,600 I gave 'em each 500 bucks out of my own pocket. 90 00:03:17,632 --> 00:03:19,677 - Thanks again, Doug. - You the man, Doug. 91 00:03:19,721 --> 00:03:21,766 Actually, I'd rather still not be a hostage. 92 00:03:21,810 --> 00:03:23,290 Pam hasn't come around on me yet. 93 00:03:23,333 --> 00:03:25,205 Tell her I'm a nice person, Jake. 94 00:03:25,248 --> 00:03:26,747 I'm sorry. Officer, are you friends with this criminal? 95 00:03:26,771 --> 00:03:28,556 - No, not really. - Absolutely, best friends. 96 00:03:28,599 --> 00:03:30,253 It's a layered relationship, Pam. 97 00:03:30,297 --> 00:03:32,212 - Best friends. - Judy, get over here. 98 00:03:33,604 --> 00:03:35,650 What is going on, man? This isn't my fault. 99 00:03:35,693 --> 00:03:37,018 Two years ago before I went straight, 100 00:03:37,042 --> 00:03:38,653 I stole a car from a drug dealer. 101 00:03:38,696 --> 00:03:41,264 Martin Halloway. Oh, no, Judy, he's a bad guy. 102 00:03:41,308 --> 00:03:42,763 I know. When I realized it was his car, 103 00:03:42,787 --> 00:03:44,528 I torched it along with the drugs 104 00:03:44,572 --> 00:03:45,984 that were in the trunk that I didn't know about. 105 00:03:46,008 --> 00:03:47,618 Oh, no, Judy. Trunk drugs? 106 00:03:47,662 --> 00:03:48,924 Millions of dollars of them. 107 00:03:48,967 --> 00:03:50,708 Halloway just found out it was me. 108 00:03:50,752 --> 00:03:52,712 Said I had to do a job for him to pay off my debt. 109 00:03:52,754 --> 00:03:54,035 But did you tell him you went straight? 110 00:03:54,059 --> 00:03:55,626 Did you tell him about Dustin? I did. 111 00:03:55,670 --> 00:03:57,411 He said he doesn't watch "Stranger Things." 112 00:03:57,454 --> 00:03:59,413 - Oh, this guy is the worst. - I know. 113 00:03:59,456 --> 00:04:01,391 He said he's gonna kill my mom if I don't do this job. 114 00:04:01,415 --> 00:04:02,696 He can't do that. I love your mom. 115 00:04:02,720 --> 00:04:04,548 So do I. That's why I'm here 116 00:04:04,592 --> 00:04:06,463 stealing this big ole bag of diamonds. 117 00:04:06,507 --> 00:04:08,509 Jake, you know how dangerous this dude can be. 118 00:04:08,552 --> 00:04:11,251 I need you to help me save my mama. 119 00:04:11,294 --> 00:04:12,600 Easy. 120 00:04:12,643 --> 00:04:13,968 I got a plan that's good for everyone. 121 00:04:13,992 --> 00:04:15,733 All I need is for you to... 122 00:04:15,777 --> 00:04:17,909 Let him go so he can arrange a drop with Halloway. 123 00:04:17,953 --> 00:04:19,781 We arrest Halloway, save Judy's mom, 124 00:04:19,824 --> 00:04:22,653 and Judy turns himself in, and why is that amazing, Rosa? 125 00:04:22,697 --> 00:04:24,568 Halloway's a huge crime boss. 126 00:04:24,612 --> 00:04:25,937 NYPD's been trying to get Halloway for years. 127 00:04:25,961 --> 00:04:27,441 That's it. 128 00:04:27,484 --> 00:04:28,766 Yeah, it is. So, since we all agree, 129 00:04:28,790 --> 00:04:30,400 I'll go tell Judy that the plan is on. 130 00:04:30,444 --> 00:04:32,576 We don't all agree. He's trapped and desperate. 131 00:04:32,620 --> 00:04:34,404 Everything he told you is a lie. 132 00:04:34,448 --> 00:04:36,798 That's all negotiating is. 133 00:04:36,841 --> 00:04:38,756 Two liars lying to each other 134 00:04:38,800 --> 00:04:40,845 until one liar stands too close to the window 135 00:04:40,889 --> 00:04:42,369 and gets shot in the head. 136 00:04:42,412 --> 00:04:44,284 That can't be all negotiating is. 137 00:04:44,327 --> 00:04:45,739 It absolutely is. Now, get in there 138 00:04:45,763 --> 00:04:47,765 and coax him to a window. Snipers to one. 139 00:04:47,809 --> 00:04:49,419 The window plan is on. I repeat. 140 00:04:49,463 --> 00:04:50,962 The window plan is on. No, no, no, no, no! 141 00:04:50,986 --> 00:04:52,901 Snipers to zero. Snipers take a nap. 142 00:04:52,944 --> 00:04:54,903 The nap plan is on. It's nap time, snipers. 143 00:04:56,513 --> 00:04:58,515 Amy, Gina, you came! 144 00:04:58,559 --> 00:05:00,450 You think I'd miss opening day of your food truck? 145 00:05:00,474 --> 00:05:02,780 I'm your biggest fan. Also your biggest investor. 146 00:05:02,824 --> 00:05:04,932 She was freaking out she was gonna lose a ton of money. 147 00:05:04,956 --> 00:05:06,436 I told you that in confidence. 148 00:05:06,480 --> 00:05:07,979 We don't have that kind of relationship. 149 00:05:08,003 --> 00:05:10,092 Well, don't worry. I'm feeling good. 150 00:05:10,135 --> 00:05:11,876 "The One Thing" truck is ready to serve. 151 00:05:11,920 --> 00:05:12,964 Yeah. 152 00:05:13,008 --> 00:05:14,444 We only serve one thing: 153 00:05:14,488 --> 00:05:16,446 The perfect meatball sandwich... 154 00:05:16,490 --> 00:05:18,579 Made exactly the way Nana Boyle used to. 155 00:05:18,622 --> 00:05:20,450 I can't believe this is finally happening. 156 00:05:22,887 --> 00:05:25,063 Ahh! 157 00:05:25,107 --> 00:05:27,109 Sorry, I'm a bit stressed. Jason and Jeff, 158 00:05:27,152 --> 00:05:28,632 the guys I hired to work the truck, 159 00:05:28,676 --> 00:05:30,504 called in sick so I'm all alone. 160 00:05:30,547 --> 00:05:31,983 What a fun opportunity. 161 00:05:32,027 --> 00:05:33,942 Okay, Boyle, stop freaking out. 162 00:05:33,985 --> 00:05:35,813 I have the day off. I can step in and help. 163 00:05:35,857 --> 00:05:37,380 Yeah, me too. I'm not off, 164 00:05:37,424 --> 00:05:38,816 but I come and go as I please. 165 00:05:38,860 --> 00:05:41,341 It's part of my charm. I'm like an outdoor cat. 166 00:05:42,646 --> 00:05:44,822 ESU won't take your deal. They think you're lying. 167 00:05:44,866 --> 00:05:46,998 I'm not lying. I don't wanna be a criminal. 168 00:05:47,042 --> 00:05:48,870 I love my life as a average citizen. 169 00:05:48,913 --> 00:05:50,828 I voted for the first time this year. 170 00:05:50,872 --> 00:05:52,023 Ed Breakfast for school board. 171 00:05:52,047 --> 00:05:53,483 I don't know. 172 00:05:53,527 --> 00:05:54,678 He had a funny name. He deserves a shot. 173 00:05:54,702 --> 00:05:56,443 That's why I voted for Stacy Ladle. 174 00:05:56,486 --> 00:05:58,159 Anyway, I'm sorry, but they're not cutting a deal. 175 00:05:58,183 --> 00:05:59,837 I gotta turn myself in 176 00:05:59,881 --> 00:06:02,666 and let Halloway kill my mama? Actually... 177 00:06:02,710 --> 00:06:04,842 there might another way to get this done. 178 00:06:04,886 --> 00:06:06,801 I've taken your negotiator hostage. 179 00:06:06,844 --> 00:06:09,020 If you come in here, I will shoot him. 180 00:06:09,064 --> 00:06:12,676 Just do whatever he says! My life is in his hands! 181 00:06:14,417 --> 00:06:16,550 That was so much fun! 182 00:06:16,593 --> 00:06:18,508 Oh, man, you sounded really scary. 183 00:06:18,552 --> 00:06:19,770 No, no, it was all you. 184 00:06:19,814 --> 00:06:21,511 The tremble in your voice sold it. 185 00:06:21,555 --> 00:06:23,600 "Just do whatever he wants." I just made that up. 186 00:06:23,644 --> 00:06:25,733 Ah, I was so in the moment. 187 00:06:25,776 --> 00:06:28,562 You are a great hostage. Oh, thanks, Judy. 188 00:06:28,605 --> 00:06:30,651 You're a great hostage taker. Whoop. 189 00:06:34,045 --> 00:06:35,917 Both: Yes, sir. 190 00:06:39,486 --> 00:06:41,966 I can't believe Peralta got taken hostage. 191 00:06:42,010 --> 00:06:44,708 The good news is... 192 00:06:44,752 --> 00:06:46,014 I'm the negotiator now. 193 00:06:46,057 --> 00:06:47,450 - Finally. - Congratulations. 194 00:06:47,494 --> 00:06:49,800 I've been waiting for this moment for so long, 195 00:06:49,844 --> 00:06:51,193 - and... - I'm ready to negotiate. 196 00:06:51,236 --> 00:06:53,761 But I'll only talk to Rosa Diaz. 197 00:06:53,804 --> 00:06:56,198 - That's me, Dennis. - Oh, come on! 198 00:06:56,938 --> 00:06:59,375 Okay, I think we're ready for a practice sandwich. 199 00:06:59,419 --> 00:07:01,290 - Sounds good, boss. - Please call me "chef." 200 00:07:01,333 --> 00:07:03,945 That's funny. 201 00:07:03,988 --> 00:07:06,077 - Chef. - Thank you. 202 00:07:06,121 --> 00:07:09,385 Okay, see. The cut is a little slopey. 203 00:07:09,429 --> 00:07:11,256 I want you to cut it straight across. 204 00:07:11,300 --> 00:07:13,215 No big deal. Again. 205 00:07:13,258 --> 00:07:14,869 Oh. 206 00:07:14,912 --> 00:07:16,044 Uhp, slopey. 207 00:07:16,087 --> 00:07:18,220 Don't over think it. Again. 208 00:07:19,482 --> 00:07:21,049 Now you're not thinking enough. 209 00:07:21,092 --> 00:07:22,964 Again. 210 00:07:23,007 --> 00:07:24,487 Still slopey. Again. 211 00:07:24,531 --> 00:07:26,010 Again! 212 00:07:26,054 --> 00:07:27,205 You know what? Why don't we try this: 213 00:07:27,229 --> 00:07:28,467 Why don't you just take that knife, 214 00:07:28,491 --> 00:07:30,051 put it to my throat, and finish the job! 215 00:07:32,930 --> 00:07:34,517 - No, not at all. - Then why are you trying 216 00:07:34,541 --> 00:07:36,499 to screw me? Oh, my God, Charles, 217 00:07:36,543 --> 00:07:38,936 what is going on with you? It's chef. 218 00:07:38,980 --> 00:07:40,523 You're not ready for this. Gina, you're up. 219 00:07:40,547 --> 00:07:42,070 Okay, but I'm not calling you chef, 220 00:07:42,113 --> 00:07:44,333 and you're not yelling at me. Mmhmm. 221 00:07:45,943 --> 00:07:47,379 - There you go. - Ah, thank you. 222 00:07:47,423 --> 00:07:50,078 No slope! A nice, straight cut! 223 00:07:50,121 --> 00:07:51,447 Thank you. I felt good 'cause the knife... 224 00:07:51,471 --> 00:07:53,037 But you smushed the bread! 225 00:07:53,081 --> 00:07:55,823 It's too smushy! 226 00:07:55,866 --> 00:07:56,911 Again. 227 00:08:00,392 --> 00:08:03,308 ♪ Rosa, Rosa, Rosa 228 00:08:03,352 --> 00:08:05,136 ♪ Are you finally single? 229 00:08:05,180 --> 00:08:07,051 - No. - ♪ I respect that 230 00:08:07,095 --> 00:08:08,879 Now come on in. We gotta talk business. 231 00:08:08,923 --> 00:08:11,229 It's so good to see you. Bring it in. 232 00:08:12,404 --> 00:08:13,928 Doug Judy, you're under arrest. 233 00:08:13,971 --> 00:08:15,799 Wait, Rosa, stop. 234 00:08:15,843 --> 00:08:17,560 All right, look, this is not really a hostage situation. 235 00:08:17,584 --> 00:08:19,213 I mean, Pam and the two Bobs are definitely being held 236 00:08:19,237 --> 00:08:20,780 against their will, but not for much longer. 237 00:08:20,804 --> 00:08:22,260 Jake is helping me take down Halloway. 238 00:08:22,284 --> 00:08:24,286 We can't do it without you. 239 00:08:24,329 --> 00:08:26,482 This is like that story my dad told me as a little kid. 240 00:08:26,506 --> 00:08:28,072 You're the frog and he's a scorpion. 241 00:08:28,116 --> 00:08:29,441 You're gonna help him across the river. 242 00:08:29,465 --> 00:08:31,119 And in the end, he'll sting you, 243 00:08:31,162 --> 00:08:33,556 and then you'll both drown. Wow, that's dark. 244 00:08:33,600 --> 00:08:35,253 My parents didn't read to me at all. 245 00:08:35,297 --> 00:08:36,579 I just watched cartoons till I fell asleep. 246 00:08:36,603 --> 00:08:38,015 Do you think that our childhoods shape 247 00:08:38,039 --> 00:08:39,475 - the adults we become? - They do. 248 00:08:39,519 --> 00:08:41,105 And cartoons shaped you into a naive little frog. 249 00:08:41,129 --> 00:08:42,585 Okay, first, little frogs are adorable, 250 00:08:42,609 --> 00:08:44,456 and second, he's not that kind of scorpion anymore. 251 00:08:44,480 --> 00:08:45,960 I'm a changed bug. 252 00:08:46,003 --> 00:08:47,285 Actually, scorpions are arthropods. 253 00:08:47,309 --> 00:08:48,504 Amy made me watch a documentary. 254 00:08:48,528 --> 00:08:49,592 Look, I know he used to be a criminal 255 00:08:49,616 --> 00:08:51,356 and he's fooled me in the past, 256 00:08:51,400 --> 00:08:52,595 and he is currently engaged in criminal activity. 257 00:08:52,619 --> 00:08:54,359 Innocent until proved guilty. 258 00:08:54,403 --> 00:08:56,207 But I am doing it. Rosa, his mother is in danger 259 00:08:56,231 --> 00:08:58,102 and we have to help her. 260 00:08:58,146 --> 00:08:59,950 Plus, he agreed to turn himself in when this is all over. 261 00:08:59,974 --> 00:09:02,977 - Right, Judy? - I promise. 262 00:09:03,020 --> 00:09:04,587 All right. 263 00:09:06,110 --> 00:09:07,198 We have an airtight plan. 264 00:09:07,242 --> 00:09:09,331 All we demand is pizza. 265 00:09:09,374 --> 00:09:12,116 Hitchcock, there's a woman here interviewing detectives 266 00:09:12,160 --> 00:09:14,075 a part of the Commissioner selection process. 267 00:09:14,118 --> 00:09:15,574 All right, I'll go hide in the janitor's closet 268 00:09:15,598 --> 00:09:17,445 until this is all over. Thanks for the heads up. 269 00:09:17,469 --> 00:09:19,535 No, it's too late for that. She wants to talk to you. 270 00:09:19,559 --> 00:09:21,561 No! How could you let this happen? 271 00:09:21,604 --> 00:09:23,824 - I'm nuts! - Hey, calm down, man. 272 00:09:23,867 --> 00:09:25,521 We just took her on a tour of the precinct 273 00:09:25,565 --> 00:09:28,176 and how she's at lunch. That means we have one hour 274 00:09:28,219 --> 00:09:30,482 to teach you how to behave like a human. 275 00:09:30,526 --> 00:09:32,484 Oh, I see. 276 00:09:32,528 --> 00:09:35,444 You're gonna "My Bare Lady" me. 277 00:09:35,487 --> 00:09:39,100 I'm assuming it's a "My Fair Lady" porn parody. 278 00:09:39,143 --> 00:09:41,624 Oh, my. We've got our work cutout for us. 279 00:09:41,668 --> 00:09:43,452 Here's our list of words to avoid: 280 00:09:43,495 --> 00:09:45,846 Chick, foxy, Jew, throb. 281 00:09:47,412 --> 00:09:49,589 No, it's not on the table. 282 00:09:49,632 --> 00:09:51,199 Practice introducing yourself. 283 00:09:51,242 --> 00:09:53,549 Hello, I'm Detective Michael Hitchcock. 284 00:09:53,593 --> 00:09:55,203 Nice job. 285 00:09:55,246 --> 00:09:57,422 But why are your hands so wet? Trick question. 286 00:09:57,466 --> 00:09:59,860 The answers disgusting, so I shouldn't tell her. 287 00:09:59,903 --> 00:10:01,644 Just don't have wet hands, man. 288 00:10:01,688 --> 00:10:04,038 Hitchcock, come out. 289 00:10:04,081 --> 00:10:05,605 It's time. 290 00:10:08,259 --> 00:10:10,566 You look incredible. 291 00:10:10,610 --> 00:10:12,089 You bet I do. 292 00:10:12,133 --> 00:10:14,178 These pants really flatter my dong. 293 00:10:14,222 --> 00:10:16,441 What? Dong wasn't on the list. 294 00:10:17,007 --> 00:10:18,269 I cannot believe I didn't know 295 00:10:18,313 --> 00:10:19,420 you and Amy were getting married. 296 00:10:19,444 --> 00:10:21,098 Yeah, well, you're not exactly 297 00:10:21,142 --> 00:10:22,942 an easy person to find. Right, right, right. 298 00:10:22,970 --> 00:10:24,624 I am elusive as hell. 299 00:10:24,667 --> 00:10:27,104 So, is there a La Creuset pot 300 00:10:27,148 --> 00:10:29,237 on your registry, by chance? Of course. 301 00:10:29,280 --> 00:10:30,673 You can cook and serve in them. 302 00:10:30,717 --> 00:10:32,893 And it looks amazing on your shelf. 303 00:10:32,936 --> 00:10:34,416 What's your color of preference? 304 00:10:34,459 --> 00:10:36,070 French grey or mineral blue? 305 00:10:36,113 --> 00:10:37,941 Oh, you really do know your Le Creuset. 306 00:10:37,985 --> 00:10:39,247 French grey. 307 00:10:39,290 --> 00:10:41,075 Mineral Blue makes me want to barf. 308 00:10:41,118 --> 00:10:44,078 Consider it gifted. Also, it would me my honor, 309 00:10:44,121 --> 00:10:45,533 to sing at your wedding. Yeah, I don't think 310 00:10:45,557 --> 00:10:47,472 that's gonna be possible. Oh, I get it. 311 00:10:47,516 --> 00:10:48,952 You're afraid when I open my mouth. 312 00:10:48,996 --> 00:10:50,650 Everyone's gonna start smushing on sight. 313 00:10:50,693 --> 00:10:52,149 No, I more meant that your probably still gonna be 314 00:10:52,173 --> 00:10:53,435 - in jail. - Damn, that's right. 315 00:10:53,478 --> 00:10:55,002 I almost forgot. Tell you what. 316 00:10:55,045 --> 00:10:56,481 I'll record you some songs. 317 00:10:56,525 --> 00:10:58,614 "Kiss From a Rose" really exploits my range. 318 00:10:58,658 --> 00:11:01,225 We have your food. 319 00:11:01,269 --> 00:11:03,532 One of my men should do it. 320 00:11:03,575 --> 00:11:05,665 It would take two of your people three trips each 321 00:11:05,708 --> 00:11:07,275 to hold this much food. My guy's a pro. 322 00:11:07,318 --> 00:11:08,493 I've been carrying takeout 323 00:11:08,537 --> 00:11:10,104 since before you were born, son. 324 00:11:10,147 --> 00:11:12,454 Fine, but I wanna know what's going on in there. 325 00:11:12,497 --> 00:11:14,499 We're putting a camera on him. 326 00:11:17,154 --> 00:11:18,634 You're on camera. No audio. 327 00:11:18,678 --> 00:11:20,288 Thought so. That's why I'm tied up. 328 00:11:20,331 --> 00:11:21,985 Scully, where the pepper flakes? 329 00:11:22,029 --> 00:11:23,944 The food's a diversion. 330 00:11:23,987 --> 00:11:25,293 Although, Scully, it is crazy 331 00:11:25,336 --> 00:11:26,531 that you forgot the pepper flakes. 332 00:11:26,555 --> 00:11:27,948 Anyways, you know what to do now. 333 00:11:27,991 --> 00:11:30,080 What I do best. Turn my heart off. 334 00:11:34,302 --> 00:11:36,304 Looks like Scully collapsed. 335 00:11:37,697 --> 00:11:39,176 Your man just had a heart attack! 336 00:11:39,220 --> 00:11:41,048 Send an ambulance! 337 00:11:41,091 --> 00:11:43,050 We're coming out. 338 00:11:43,093 --> 00:11:44,747 ♪ 339 00:11:44,791 --> 00:11:46,096 Something doesn't feel right. 340 00:11:46,140 --> 00:11:47,532 Why is there a sheet over his head? 341 00:11:47,576 --> 00:11:49,273 Because that's not our guy. 342 00:11:49,317 --> 00:11:50,686 Judy's trying to escape. There's no way he could- 343 00:11:50,710 --> 00:11:52,320 - All units move on the ambulance now! 344 00:11:52,363 --> 00:11:54,235 - All units... - Move, move, move! 345 00:11:54,278 --> 00:11:56,367 Nice try, Judy. 346 00:11:57,194 --> 00:11:58,630 - Hi, there. - Nice work, Dennis, 347 00:11:58,674 --> 00:12:00,720 you just caught a man having a medical emergency. 348 00:12:00,763 --> 00:12:02,504 Why was there a sheet over his head? 349 00:12:02,547 --> 00:12:05,202 - Couldn't find his pulse. - Yeah, it's super weak. 350 00:12:05,246 --> 00:12:07,161 We got movement. Hostages are coming out. 351 00:12:07,204 --> 00:12:08,684 Hostages are coming out! 352 00:12:10,033 --> 00:12:11,643 Does anyone have eyes on Judy? 353 00:12:11,687 --> 00:12:13,602 Where is Doug Judy? 354 00:12:13,645 --> 00:12:16,213 So glad Scully put the uniforms in with the pizza. 355 00:12:16,257 --> 00:12:17,737 I keep finding hidden pepperonis. 356 00:12:17,780 --> 00:12:20,217 Oh, man, all I got was a pocket full of lettuce. 357 00:12:20,261 --> 00:12:22,132 Jake, I got you. 358 00:12:22,176 --> 00:12:24,352 Ooh, a garlic knot. 359 00:12:24,395 --> 00:12:26,310 Okay, let's ride. 360 00:12:29,096 --> 00:12:30,706 We'll be safe here. I know the owner. 361 00:12:30,750 --> 00:12:32,447 He'd never turn me in. Yeah, I have 362 00:12:32,490 --> 00:12:33,946 the exact same relationship with the guy who runs 363 00:12:33,970 --> 00:12:35,972 the laser tag place I love. I mean, gun range. 364 00:12:36,016 --> 00:12:38,801 Peralta, who you out here stuntin' for, huh? 365 00:12:38,845 --> 00:12:41,761 I love laser-T. We gotta go sometime, man. 366 00:12:41,804 --> 00:12:43,371 I was hoping you'd say that. 367 00:12:43,414 --> 00:12:44,696 I wasn't stunting. A little bit. 368 00:12:44,720 --> 00:12:46,045 - A little stunting. - You stunted. 369 00:12:46,069 --> 00:12:47,830 A little bit. All right, let's text Halloway 370 00:12:47,854 --> 00:12:50,030 and set up the drop. Okay, yeah. 371 00:12:50,073 --> 00:12:52,423 Got the diamonds. Let's meet. 372 00:12:52,467 --> 00:12:53,642 Done. 373 00:12:53,685 --> 00:12:54,861 Okay, now we wait. 374 00:12:54,904 --> 00:12:56,993 Now we wait. 375 00:13:05,915 --> 00:13:08,526 Kind of weird, sitting silently 376 00:13:08,570 --> 00:13:10,702 in a private karaoke room, not singing. 377 00:13:10,746 --> 00:13:11,854 Yeah, but we're on a mission, 378 00:13:11,878 --> 00:13:13,401 so, you know, gotta stay focused. 379 00:13:13,444 --> 00:13:16,796 True, true, true, true, true, true. 380 00:13:16,839 --> 00:13:18,623 Both: ♪ So I wake in the morning 381 00:13:18,667 --> 00:13:20,103 ♪ And I step outside 382 00:13:20,147 --> 00:13:21,931 ♪ And I take a deep breath 383 00:13:21,975 --> 00:13:23,846 ♪ And I get real high 384 00:13:23,890 --> 00:13:26,675 ♪ And I scream at the top of my lungs ♪ 385 00:13:26,718 --> 00:13:29,417 ♪ What's going on? 386 00:13:29,460 --> 00:13:30,853 Uh-oh. 387 00:13:30,897 --> 00:13:32,550 - Halloway. - Yeah. 388 00:13:32,594 --> 00:13:34,465 The drop is set for 5:00 p.m. 389 00:13:34,509 --> 00:13:36,728 - Let's do this. - Totally. 390 00:13:36,772 --> 00:13:39,427 Although... that is an hour and a half from now. 391 00:13:39,470 --> 00:13:41,013 And the drop point is actually pretty close to here. 392 00:13:41,037 --> 00:13:43,518 Both: So... 393 00:13:43,561 --> 00:13:47,957 ♪ And I said hey yeah, yeah, yeah ♪ 394 00:13:48,001 --> 00:13:50,046 Order up, chef. 395 00:13:50,090 --> 00:13:51,743 Why are you making 396 00:13:51,787 --> 00:13:53,745 six sandwiches at once? It's more efficient. 397 00:13:53,789 --> 00:13:55,201 Now we're ready for the next five customers. 398 00:13:55,225 --> 00:13:57,488 Who gives a hump about efficiency? 399 00:13:57,532 --> 00:13:58,925 The perfect meatball sandwich 400 00:13:58,968 --> 00:14:02,058 is sauced exactly 70 seconds before being served 401 00:14:02,102 --> 00:14:03,712 to maintain bread integrity. 402 00:14:03,755 --> 00:14:05,757 So sandwich number one will be fine, 403 00:14:05,801 --> 00:14:08,586 but sandwich number six will be a soggy turd. 404 00:14:08,630 --> 00:14:11,546 Change in menu. We're serving soggy turds now! 405 00:14:11,589 --> 00:14:13,983 Get 'em while they're wet. Okay, I quit. 406 00:14:14,027 --> 00:14:15,680 Me too. You're insane. 407 00:14:15,724 --> 00:14:17,769 Fine, quit just like Jeff and Jason did. 408 00:14:17,813 --> 00:14:19,554 You told us they got sick. 409 00:14:19,597 --> 00:14:21,686 They got sick of hard work just like you two! 410 00:14:21,730 --> 00:14:23,601 Get out! You'll never cook in this town again! 411 00:14:23,645 --> 00:14:25,473 - We're not chefs! - And you never will be. 412 00:14:29,172 --> 00:14:31,218 I think so. Wait. 413 00:14:31,261 --> 00:14:33,568 He's bringing his hand to his face. 414 00:14:33,611 --> 00:14:35,787 Don't pick your teeth. Don't pick your nose. 415 00:14:35,831 --> 00:14:38,616 Oh, dear, he's going to lick something off his fingers. 416 00:14:38,660 --> 00:14:41,532 Oh, no, he's stroking his chin. 417 00:14:41,576 --> 00:14:43,056 As if in thought. 418 00:14:43,099 --> 00:14:44,579 Not as if. 419 00:14:44,622 --> 00:14:46,059 He is in thought. 420 00:14:46,102 --> 00:14:47,930 Oop, they're looking at us. Act natural. 421 00:14:47,974 --> 00:14:49,758 - Spreadsheet, spreadsheet. - Crime, crime. 422 00:14:49,801 --> 00:14:51,673 - Precinct, precinct. - Yeah. 423 00:14:51,716 --> 00:14:52,935 We swept the area. 424 00:14:52,979 --> 00:14:54,806 No sign of Doug Judy or Peralta. 425 00:14:54,850 --> 00:14:56,808 I can't believe that idiot thought 426 00:14:56,852 --> 00:14:58,767 he could just waltz in here and do my job. 427 00:14:58,810 --> 00:15:00,638 It's hard to be a negotiator! 428 00:15:00,682 --> 00:15:03,728 My first 50 jumpers, 49 died. 429 00:15:03,772 --> 00:15:05,165 You only talked down one person? 430 00:15:05,208 --> 00:15:07,123 No, he jumped too, but he landed on this woman 431 00:15:07,167 --> 00:15:08,690 who broke his fall. She died, 432 00:15:08,733 --> 00:15:10,133 but you can't count that against me. 433 00:15:10,170 --> 00:15:12,085 - I definitely can. - Yeah, well, save it. 434 00:15:12,128 --> 00:15:14,130 Peralta's the one who got himself taken hostage. 435 00:15:14,174 --> 00:15:15,784 I don't think he was a hostage. 436 00:15:15,827 --> 00:15:17,699 He's pretty good friends with that Doug guy. 437 00:15:19,005 --> 00:15:21,485 Diaz, what the hell is going on? 438 00:15:21,529 --> 00:15:23,507 First, a jeweler will come out and inspect the diamonds. 439 00:15:23,531 --> 00:15:24,682 Then, when he gives the okay, 440 00:15:24,706 --> 00:15:25,770 Halloway will come and get them. 441 00:15:25,794 --> 00:15:27,839 And then I'll take him down. 442 00:15:27,883 --> 00:15:31,495 All right, that's the signal. Here we go. 443 00:15:33,671 --> 00:15:34,977 What's up, dude? 444 00:15:38,024 --> 00:15:39,155 ♪ 445 00:15:39,199 --> 00:15:40,678 Anybody ever tell you, you look like 446 00:15:40,722 --> 00:15:43,072 the most interesting man in the world? 447 00:15:43,116 --> 00:15:45,292 You get that a lot? 448 00:15:45,335 --> 00:15:47,859 Jeez, I get it. We're not friends. 449 00:15:47,903 --> 00:15:49,949 I'll find another bocce ball partner. 450 00:15:49,992 --> 00:15:53,082 There he is. ♪ Halloway, it's your day 451 00:15:53,126 --> 00:15:54,625 What's up, Mr. Halloway. How you doing? 452 00:15:54,649 --> 00:15:56,564 Shut up. Give me the diamonds. 453 00:15:56,607 --> 00:15:58,609 Man, I guess the no-small-talk policy 454 00:15:58,653 --> 00:16:00,785 starts at the top. Come on, come on, come on. 455 00:16:00,829 --> 00:16:02,874 - Peralta! - No, no, no, not now. 456 00:16:02,918 --> 00:16:04,137 I tracked your phone, idiot. 457 00:16:04,180 --> 00:16:05,660 Judy wasn't lying. 458 00:16:05,703 --> 00:16:07,029 That's Halloway. We gotta arrest him. 459 00:16:07,053 --> 00:16:08,706 - Jake, he's running. - Come on, man. 460 00:16:08,750 --> 00:16:10,554 Only if I get the collar and 100% of the credit. 461 00:16:10,578 --> 00:16:11,883 Are you negotiating right now? 462 00:16:11,927 --> 00:16:13,537 Always. 463 00:16:13,581 --> 00:16:15,037 Okay, that was actually a really cool thing to say. 464 00:16:15,061 --> 00:16:17,019 All right, let's do it. Judy, stay here. 465 00:16:17,063 --> 00:16:19,630 Okay. 466 00:16:19,674 --> 00:16:20,762 Stop! 467 00:16:23,199 --> 00:16:25,027 Sorry I ran out on you at the jewelry store. 468 00:16:25,071 --> 00:16:26,265 I just couldn't let this guys get away. 469 00:16:26,289 --> 00:16:27,856 Look, man, I'm fine with it. 470 00:16:27,899 --> 00:16:29,945 Arresting Halloway's gonna get me a promotion, 471 00:16:29,989 --> 00:16:32,054 and at the end of the day, that's what this is all about. 472 00:16:32,078 --> 00:16:33,296 Right, well, that and getting 473 00:16:33,340 --> 00:16:35,037 a major drug lord off the streets. 474 00:16:35,081 --> 00:16:37,189 Let me give you some advice. I don't care about that. 475 00:16:37,213 --> 00:16:38,886 You know, you should really look up the word advice. 476 00:16:38,910 --> 00:16:40,149 I think you might be surprised what you see. 477 00:16:40,173 --> 00:16:41,913 All right, let's bring in Doug Judy. 478 00:16:41,957 --> 00:16:44,003 Oh, no! 479 00:16:44,046 --> 00:16:45,569 Where is he? Doug? 480 00:16:45,613 --> 00:16:46,918 Don't worry. We'll get him. 481 00:16:46,962 --> 00:16:48,113 At least we have Halloway and the diamonds. 482 00:16:48,137 --> 00:16:49,573 - Doug! - Wait, why are you 483 00:16:49,617 --> 00:16:51,358 - still calling for him? - Doug! 484 00:16:51,401 --> 00:16:53,969 Oh, my God, he has the diamonds, doesn't he? 485 00:16:54,013 --> 00:16:57,146 Doug! 486 00:16:59,757 --> 00:17:01,344 I'm sure Judy didn't run off with the diamonds. 487 00:17:01,368 --> 00:17:03,065 I bet he's looking for us right now. 488 00:17:03,109 --> 00:17:04,434 You know what, I bet he's worried that we're in trouble. 489 00:17:04,458 --> 00:17:06,131 I'll just call him and put his mind at ease. 490 00:17:06,155 --> 00:17:08,375 Dude, he's already gone. He's not picking up. 491 00:17:08,418 --> 00:17:10,116 - What's up, Peralta. - Ha! 492 00:17:10,159 --> 00:17:11,465 He did pick up. In your... 493 00:17:11,508 --> 00:17:13,380 - This is good-bye forever. - No! 494 00:17:13,423 --> 00:17:15,686 Ugh, I can't believe you deceived me. 495 00:17:15,730 --> 00:17:17,316 I can't believe you used my love for your mother 496 00:17:17,340 --> 00:17:19,081 against me. I love that you love her. 497 00:17:19,125 --> 00:17:20,624 Of course I do. She's a living saint. 498 00:17:20,648 --> 00:17:22,606 Amen. Look, I wasn't lying though. 499 00:17:22,650 --> 00:17:24,541 Halloway was gonna hurt her and you saved her life, 500 00:17:24,565 --> 00:17:26,480 but then I was all alone with the diamonds, 501 00:17:26,523 --> 00:17:28,371 next thing I know, I'm hot wiring a car and driving away. 502 00:17:28,395 --> 00:17:30,614 Oh, but I thought you liked being a good citizen? 503 00:17:30,658 --> 00:17:32,312 You voted Ed Breakfast for school board. 504 00:17:32,355 --> 00:17:34,575 And he immediately had a sex scandal. 505 00:17:34,618 --> 00:17:36,316 It was very disillusioning. For sure. 506 00:17:36,359 --> 00:17:38,666 Our democracy is crumbling. But what about your job? 507 00:17:38,709 --> 00:17:40,320 What about Dustin from "Stranger Things"? 508 00:17:40,363 --> 00:17:41,669 Famous kids are monsters. 509 00:17:41,712 --> 00:17:43,323 You do not wanna meet Young Sheldon. 510 00:17:43,366 --> 00:17:44,672 Ah, that's disappointing. 511 00:17:44,715 --> 00:17:46,456 He was so good in "Big Little Lies." 512 00:17:46,500 --> 00:17:47,694 Wait, no, we are not talking about this right now! 513 00:17:47,718 --> 00:17:49,242 They could take my badge, Judy! 514 00:17:49,285 --> 00:17:51,722 I guess Rosa was right. I'm scorpion. 515 00:17:51,766 --> 00:17:53,420 Scorpion's gonna scorp. 516 00:17:53,463 --> 00:17:55,224 I'm sorry I can't be the man you want me to be. 517 00:17:55,248 --> 00:17:57,119 Damn it, stop being so romantic. 518 00:17:57,163 --> 00:17:59,339 Now turn around and come back to me, you fool? 519 00:17:59,382 --> 00:18:01,167 Hello? Hello? 520 00:18:01,210 --> 00:18:02,516 He's gone. 521 00:18:02,559 --> 00:18:04,692 He broke my heart. 522 00:18:04,735 --> 00:18:07,129 Now's the time where you tell me everything's gonna be okay. 523 00:18:07,173 --> 00:18:09,827 - Everything's gonna be okay. - You don't know that, Rosa! 524 00:18:09,871 --> 00:18:12,613 Ah, Hitchcock, I just got off the phone with Anne Sumter. 525 00:18:12,656 --> 00:18:14,528 She said you really helped my candidacy. 526 00:18:14,571 --> 00:18:17,052 - Oh, it's my pleasure, sir. - You were so professional. 527 00:18:17,096 --> 00:18:19,272 I know. I didn't even fart once. 528 00:18:19,315 --> 00:18:20,708 You're right. I can hold it. 529 00:18:20,751 --> 00:18:22,797 You know, if you can change for an interview, 530 00:18:22,840 --> 00:18:25,408 you can change for good. Nah, too much work. 531 00:18:25,452 --> 00:18:27,671 But that's not how "My Fair Lady" ends. 532 00:18:27,715 --> 00:18:30,413 Eliza Doolittle doesn't go back to her old life. 533 00:18:30,457 --> 00:18:32,198 She falls in love with Henry Higgins. 534 00:18:32,241 --> 00:18:34,156 Well, "My Bare Lady," is a little different. 535 00:18:34,200 --> 00:18:36,202 It's not Eliza Doolittle and Henry Higgins. 536 00:18:36,245 --> 00:18:38,726 It's Eliza DooEverybody and Leroy Pipe. 537 00:18:38,769 --> 00:18:40,249 And in the end, they rub... 538 00:18:40,293 --> 00:18:42,121 Nope. We don't need a recap. 539 00:18:42,164 --> 00:18:44,253 Thank you for your help today. Anytime, Captain. 540 00:18:46,255 --> 00:18:47,865 Hey, guys. Uh, can we talk? 541 00:18:47,909 --> 00:18:49,606 Let me guess, you got overwhelmed 542 00:18:49,650 --> 00:18:51,391 and had to use our six-sandwich technique. 543 00:18:51,434 --> 00:18:53,393 No, my one at a time system worked perfectly. 544 00:18:53,436 --> 00:18:54,742 - Oh. - It's just, 545 00:18:54,785 --> 00:18:56,613 making Nana Boyle's meatball recipe 546 00:18:56,657 --> 00:18:58,702 got me thinking a lot about her... 547 00:18:58,746 --> 00:19:01,183 And let me guess, you realized she'd be ashamed 548 00:19:01,227 --> 00:19:03,403 of how you acted? No, Nana Boyle was a monster. 549 00:19:03,446 --> 00:19:05,187 She once yelled at me so loud, I fainted. 550 00:19:05,231 --> 00:19:06,580 She was a hateful witch. 551 00:19:06,623 --> 00:19:08,123 She died with no friends. And let me guess, 552 00:19:08,147 --> 00:19:09,733 you realized you were acting just like her 553 00:19:09,757 --> 00:19:11,411 and you felt terrible. 554 00:19:11,454 --> 00:19:12,455 Yes. 555 00:19:12,499 --> 00:19:14,283 You don't do "and let me guess" 556 00:19:14,327 --> 00:19:15,719 until you're sure you're right. 557 00:19:15,763 --> 00:19:17,591 Can you guys forgive me? Please? 558 00:19:17,634 --> 00:19:19,201 Of course, Charles. 559 00:19:19,245 --> 00:19:20,685 But we will never work for you again. 560 00:19:20,724 --> 00:19:23,118 Yeah, that's a smart move. It's like Jekyll and Hyde. 561 00:19:23,162 --> 00:19:24,772 I can't control when Nana comes out. 562 00:19:24,815 --> 00:19:26,228 Just got off the phone with the brass. 563 00:19:26,252 --> 00:19:27,557 It doesn't look good. 564 00:19:27,601 --> 00:19:29,144 They're still trying to decide on a punishment 565 00:19:29,168 --> 00:19:30,362 for your actions. Well, did you tell them 566 00:19:30,386 --> 00:19:31,624 I feel so bad I have a tummy ache? 567 00:19:31,648 --> 00:19:33,215 I did. They were unaffected. 568 00:19:33,259 --> 00:19:34,714 They said they could have justified your tactics 569 00:19:34,738 --> 00:19:36,740 if you'd come away with Halloway and the diamonds, 570 00:19:36,784 --> 00:19:38,699 but as things stand, there are no diamonds. 571 00:19:38,742 --> 00:19:40,309 Well, there are some diamonds. 572 00:19:40,353 --> 00:19:42,137 You know, the tops of engagement rings, 573 00:19:42,181 --> 00:19:43,810 diamond mines, but, yes, I see what you're saying 574 00:19:43,834 --> 00:19:46,228 in regards to these diamonds and it ruining my career. 575 00:19:46,272 --> 00:19:47,814 You're looking at a suspension, maybe worse. 576 00:19:47,838 --> 00:19:49,623 Unless you can track down Doug Judy 577 00:19:49,666 --> 00:19:51,799 and recover those diamonds. 578 00:19:51,842 --> 00:19:53,801 I usually run into him about once a year. 579 00:19:53,844 --> 00:19:56,630 Wait a minute. What have we here? 580 00:19:57,370 --> 00:20:00,677 I've got this coupon for a private room. 581 00:20:00,721 --> 00:20:03,202 Yes. Right this way. 582 00:20:03,941 --> 00:20:06,857 We already have a song cued up for you. 583 00:20:06,901 --> 00:20:09,208 Judy. 584 00:20:09,251 --> 00:20:11,906 Thank you so much for coming. 585 00:20:11,949 --> 00:20:15,518 Look, I thought about it and I did you dirty. 586 00:20:15,562 --> 00:20:17,259 I never meant to cause you any trouble. 587 00:20:17,303 --> 00:20:18,652 Yeah, well, you caused me a lot. 588 00:20:18,695 --> 00:20:20,349 You're talking to a pre-recorded video, 589 00:20:20,393 --> 00:20:22,308 but it's cool. I know what you're saying. 590 00:20:22,351 --> 00:20:24,484 I hear you in my heart. What am I doing here? 591 00:20:24,527 --> 00:20:26,877 I feel the same way. You my best friend too. 592 00:20:26,921 --> 00:20:28,662 Look, I'm not coming back. 593 00:20:28,705 --> 00:20:30,272 I started a new life here in San Diego. 594 00:20:30,316 --> 00:20:31,839 Stupid telling me where you are. 595 00:20:31,882 --> 00:20:33,754 Come on, man, I ain't in no damn San Diego. 596 00:20:33,797 --> 00:20:35,669 Everybody knows that place sucks! 597 00:20:35,712 --> 00:20:37,366 Here's what I wanna say, though: 598 00:20:37,410 --> 00:20:39,281 I'm sorry I won't be at your wedding. 599 00:20:39,325 --> 00:20:43,851 But I did record you a CD of original smush jams 600 00:20:43,894 --> 00:20:45,809 that will consummate the marriage. 601 00:20:45,853 --> 00:20:47,507 It's on the table next to you 602 00:20:47,550 --> 00:20:49,596 along with a little something else. 603 00:20:52,294 --> 00:20:53,861 A French grey Le Creuset pot. 604 00:20:53,904 --> 00:20:56,342 Now look inside it. 605 00:20:56,385 --> 00:20:58,344 The diamonds. 606 00:20:58,387 --> 00:21:00,737 Yes! I cannot believe you actually 607 00:21:00,781 --> 00:21:03,349 brought them back... 608 00:21:03,392 --> 00:21:05,525 - Yeah, mistimed that one. - No, you're the best. 609 00:21:05,568 --> 00:21:07,657 Look, even though I am a scorpion, 610 00:21:07,701 --> 00:21:10,878 I will never drown your adorable little frog ass. 611 00:21:10,921 --> 00:21:12,662 So that's what I had to say. 612 00:21:12,706 --> 00:21:15,404 I'm sure I'll see you again at some point. 613 00:21:15,448 --> 00:21:16,971 Now that coupon you got there, 614 00:21:17,014 --> 00:21:19,539 that's for a full hour in a private room. 615 00:21:19,582 --> 00:21:22,803 - So... - So... 616 00:21:22,846 --> 00:21:23,891 both: ♪ I said hey 617 00:21:23,934 --> 00:21:25,327 ♪ 618 00:21:25,371 --> 00:21:28,287 ♪ What's going on? 619 00:21:28,330 --> 00:21:30,376 Not a doctor. Shh. 46166

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