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1
00:00:00,500 --> 00:00:07,460
This programme contains some strong
language and scenes which
some viewers may find upsetting.
2
00:00:10,020 --> 00:00:13,260
One of the more persistent cliches
of the police procedural
3
00:00:13,260 --> 00:00:17,060
is that the new partner
always winds up dead.
4
00:00:19,620 --> 00:00:21,860
And here I am.
5
00:00:21,860 --> 00:00:24,260
The living embodiment of
that trope.
6
00:00:24,260 --> 00:00:27,540
Well, I'm not living any more.
7
00:00:29,940 --> 00:00:32,740
And I'm not a cliche, I hope.
8
00:00:34,260 --> 00:00:35,620
But my story...
9
00:00:35,620 --> 00:00:38,140
..well...
HE CHUCKLES
10
00:00:38,140 --> 00:00:40,500
..it's as old as time itself.
11
00:01:12,100 --> 00:01:13,300
TAPPING ON WINDOW
12
00:01:15,660 --> 00:01:17,660
Can I come in?
13
00:01:17,660 --> 00:01:20,580
Yes, what are you waiting for?
Hands are full.
14
00:01:20,580 --> 00:01:21,940
HE SIGHS
15
00:01:26,740 --> 00:01:28,860
Hurry up, it's freezing!
16
00:01:28,860 --> 00:01:30,420
Here you are.
17
00:01:31,860 --> 00:01:35,420
Have you sugared it?
I put a sweetener in.
18
00:01:35,420 --> 00:01:37,260
A sweetener? Yes!
19
00:01:37,260 --> 00:01:38,940
Do you want Type 2 diabetes?
20
00:01:38,940 --> 00:01:41,300
No, I want two bloody sugars!
21
00:01:41,300 --> 00:01:44,500
Trust me to get saddled with
Varney the vegan.
22
00:01:44,500 --> 00:01:46,940
I'm only thinking
about your blood pressure.
23
00:01:50,980 --> 00:01:54,580
When I did stakeouts with Dobbo,
we'd have Red Bulls,
24
00:01:54,580 --> 00:01:57,540
tin of Quality Street,
full stack of Pringles.
25
00:01:57,540 --> 00:01:59,220
Each? Yeah!
26
00:02:00,340 --> 00:02:03,540
You get two good pisses
in one of them tubes.
27
00:02:03,540 --> 00:02:06,180
Handy for when you were
doing undercover work.
28
00:02:06,180 --> 00:02:08,140
That sounds very unsanitary.
29
00:02:09,940 --> 00:02:11,940
Never did me any harm.
30
00:02:14,780 --> 00:02:16,980
I dread to think what you put
in the Quality Street tin.
31
00:02:16,980 --> 00:02:19,180
HE CHUCKLES
32
00:02:19,180 --> 00:02:21,740
By the way,
I'm not a fully paid-up vegan.
33
00:02:21,740 --> 00:02:23,460
I'm more of a flexitarian.
34
00:02:23,460 --> 00:02:26,060
I do eat meat
about once a month.
35
00:02:26,060 --> 00:02:28,220
Bloody hell, Ronald McDonald.
36
00:02:30,260 --> 00:02:34,740
Hey, did you know, in Uruguay,
there's 3.7 cows for every human?
37
00:02:34,740 --> 00:02:37,300
No, I didn't.
Well, you do now, so...
38
00:02:38,620 --> 00:02:39,900
..think on.
39
00:02:51,220 --> 00:02:53,140
Brothers and sisters
have I none,
40
00:02:53,140 --> 00:02:55,860
but that man's father
is my father's son.
41
00:02:55,860 --> 00:02:58,380
Who am I talking about?
You did this one last night.
42
00:02:58,380 --> 00:02:59,700
Did I?
43
00:02:59,700 --> 00:03:01,220
Yeah.
44
00:03:01,220 --> 00:03:02,660
It's your son.
45
00:03:03,740 --> 00:03:05,340
Oh... Correct.
46
00:03:10,300 --> 00:03:12,220
You must miss him.
47
00:03:13,460 --> 00:03:16,020
Who? Dobson.
48
00:03:19,700 --> 00:03:22,260
We had our fair share of
arguments.
49
00:03:23,620 --> 00:03:25,660
He could be a right grumpy bugger.
50
00:03:25,660 --> 00:03:27,340
What, grumpier than...
51
00:03:29,620 --> 00:03:31,140
..most coppers?
52
00:03:31,140 --> 00:03:34,020
He was very different to you,
put it that way.
53
00:03:36,940 --> 00:03:39,220
Did you see anyone? Nah.
54
00:03:39,220 --> 00:03:40,980
I saw a fox.
55
00:03:42,700 --> 00:03:44,340
Heard an owl.
56
00:03:44,340 --> 00:03:45,420
Some bats.
57
00:03:45,420 --> 00:03:47,500
Felt like Bill Oddie.
58
00:03:47,500 --> 00:03:49,500
Well, no-one's going to be
dealing drugs
59
00:03:49,500 --> 00:03:51,340
with us sat here in a patrol car,
are they?
60
00:03:51,340 --> 00:03:53,900
I thought they used
unmarked cars for stakeouts.
61
00:03:53,900 --> 00:03:55,500
We're a deterrent.
62
00:03:55,500 --> 00:03:57,460
That's what Control said.
63
00:03:59,220 --> 00:04:01,580
There's been some
vandalism, apparently.
64
00:04:01,580 --> 00:04:03,500
Probably just Goths.
65
00:04:03,500 --> 00:04:05,180
They come over from Leeds.
66
00:04:05,180 --> 00:04:08,060
You got a copy of the report?
I'd quite like to read it.
67
00:04:13,420 --> 00:04:14,980
The one that makes it sells it.
68
00:04:14,980 --> 00:04:16,780
The one that buys it
never uses it.
69
00:04:16,780 --> 00:04:21,060
The one that uses it never knows
that he's using it. What is it?
70
00:04:23,460 --> 00:04:25,100
Say it again.
71
00:04:25,100 --> 00:04:26,820
The one that makes it sells it.
72
00:04:26,820 --> 00:04:28,500
The one that buys it
never uses it.
73
00:04:28,500 --> 00:04:32,620
The one that uses it never knows
that he's using it. What is it?
74
00:04:34,980 --> 00:04:37,740
I don't know. Is it a towel?
It's usually a towel.
75
00:04:37,740 --> 00:04:39,380
Nope. Give up?
76
00:04:41,940 --> 00:04:43,940
Yeah.
77
00:04:43,940 --> 00:04:45,460
A coffin.
78
00:04:46,420 --> 00:04:47,940
Think about it.
79
00:04:49,780 --> 00:04:52,940
The one that buys it never
uses it... Yep.
80
00:04:52,940 --> 00:04:55,620
Yep. It's very clever.
81
00:05:01,300 --> 00:05:03,660
I know hundreds of these, me.
82
00:05:05,460 --> 00:05:07,220
I know you do.
83
00:05:08,580 --> 00:05:10,620
It's 20 years doing this.
84
00:05:12,540 --> 00:05:14,460
You've got to keep your mind
occupied.
85
00:05:17,300 --> 00:05:19,980
Keep the dark thoughts at bay.
86
00:05:24,820 --> 00:05:26,740
Ah... Excuse me.
87
00:05:33,900 --> 00:05:36,220
VARNEY SNIFFS
88
00:05:36,220 --> 00:05:39,300
Oh, Jesus!
What is that? It stinks!
89
00:05:39,300 --> 00:05:42,340
Chicken tikka masala.
Do you want some?
90
00:05:42,340 --> 00:05:45,460
No. Could you put the lid on it
or eat it outside the vehicle?
91
00:05:45,460 --> 00:05:48,740
Always better after a few days.
The flavours really come out.
92
00:05:48,740 --> 00:05:51,300
Please, Thomo, I'm really
sensitive to smells.
93
00:05:55,820 --> 00:05:57,740
All right, fine.
94
00:06:05,460 --> 00:06:06,620
Ugh...
95
00:06:10,220 --> 00:06:12,380
It's just summat to do, innit?
96
00:06:19,620 --> 00:06:22,540
Did they offer you
any counselling after...
97
00:06:24,220 --> 00:06:25,700
..what happened?
98
00:06:28,340 --> 00:06:30,820
They did, yeah, but I never went.
99
00:06:32,180 --> 00:06:33,620
Why not?
100
00:06:34,820 --> 00:06:36,340
I don't know, I...
101
00:06:38,540 --> 00:06:39,860
What?
102
00:06:41,580 --> 00:06:43,020
I...
103
00:06:44,700 --> 00:06:45,740
Go on.
104
00:06:48,340 --> 00:06:50,020
I...
105
00:06:50,020 --> 00:06:52,180
..spy with my little eye...
106
00:06:52,180 --> 00:06:54,300
..something beginning with...
107
00:06:55,580 --> 00:06:56,940
..S-W.
108
00:06:59,340 --> 00:07:00,780
Steering wheel.
109
00:07:00,780 --> 00:07:02,020
Yeah, correct. Your go.
110
00:07:03,260 --> 00:07:06,500
All right, I've got a game for
you. Have you ever played, um...
111
00:07:06,500 --> 00:07:08,660
..FortunatelyUnfortunately?
112
00:07:08,660 --> 00:07:10,820
No. Go on, how do you play?
113
00:07:10,820 --> 00:07:13,060
Well, we tell a story
114
00:07:13,060 --> 00:07:16,900
and one of us begins every
sentence with "fortunately",
115
00:07:16,900 --> 00:07:19,700
and the other one counters it
with "unfortunately".
116
00:07:19,700 --> 00:07:21,820
So you might say, uh,
117
00:07:21,820 --> 00:07:24,660
"Fortunately,
I won the lottery today."
118
00:07:24,660 --> 00:07:27,580
And I'll say, "Unfortunately,
I lost the ticket."
119
00:07:27,580 --> 00:07:28,820
Oh, right, go on.
120
00:07:28,820 --> 00:07:31,340
Sounds good. You go first.
121
00:07:31,340 --> 00:07:34,580
Fortunately, I found
the ticket in my jeans pocket.
122
00:07:36,300 --> 00:07:39,260
Unfortunately,
I'd just washed my jeans,
123
00:07:39,260 --> 00:07:40,860
so the ticket was ruined.
124
00:07:40,860 --> 00:07:45,220
Fortunately, uh, the newsagent I
bought the ticket from had a copy.
125
00:07:45,220 --> 00:07:49,700
Unfortunately, it was the national
lottery of Zimbabwe,
126
00:07:49,700 --> 00:07:52,140
so the ticket was worth £3.50.
127
00:07:52,140 --> 00:07:54,780
Fortunately, they flew me to Africa
to collect my winnings.
128
00:07:54,780 --> 00:07:56,860
Unfortunately, the plane crashed.
129
00:07:56,860 --> 00:07:59,700
Fortunately, we were washed
up on a desert island
130
00:07:59,700 --> 00:08:02,020
with a beautiful native girl.
131
00:08:02,020 --> 00:08:04,860
Unfortunately, she was a cannibal.
132
00:08:04,860 --> 00:08:07,580
Fortunately,
she was a vegan cannibal.
133
00:08:07,580 --> 00:08:10,860
Unfortunately, she was
a flexitarian vegan cannibal.
134
00:08:10,860 --> 00:08:12,900
She ate meat once a month.
135
00:08:12,900 --> 00:08:15,660
Fortunately, my partner came
to rescue me.
136
00:08:21,100 --> 00:08:23,620
Unfortunately,
my partner was killed.
137
00:08:24,820 --> 00:08:28,940
He had his throat slit right there
where you're sitting now.
138
00:08:28,940 --> 00:08:31,020
He had a wife and two kids.
139
00:08:32,340 --> 00:08:34,260
Another one on the way.
140
00:08:36,940 --> 00:08:40,180
And I was in a takeaway
waiting for poppadums.
141
00:08:47,300 --> 00:08:50,580
Fortunately, you're a strong
person and you...
142
00:08:50,580 --> 00:08:53,580
..can move on
and keep helping others.
143
00:08:53,580 --> 00:08:55,660
Unfortunately, I'm not.
144
00:09:06,500 --> 00:09:09,940
I realise now I should have let
you do the fortunatelys.
145
00:09:15,900 --> 00:09:19,060
I heard he was...
I don't want to talk about it.
146
00:10:11,420 --> 00:10:12,580
HE YAWNS
147
00:10:12,580 --> 00:10:14,940
Excuse me!
148
00:10:14,940 --> 00:10:16,220
Did you not sleep?
149
00:10:16,220 --> 00:10:17,620
No, course not.
150
00:10:17,620 --> 00:10:19,820
I'm above a butcher's.
151
00:10:19,820 --> 00:10:21,660
Had the bell going all day.
152
00:10:23,340 --> 00:10:27,020
Did you?
Yeah, was dead to the world.
153
00:10:28,420 --> 00:10:30,460
You've just got to
get into a routine.
154
00:10:30,460 --> 00:10:32,900
Yeah, well, you haven't got
teenagers
155
00:10:32,900 --> 00:10:35,620
stomping up and down
listening to Stormsby.
156
00:10:40,820 --> 00:10:45,540
All right, top five character
tropes in police dramas.
157
00:10:45,540 --> 00:10:47,500
The quirky pathologist.
158
00:10:47,500 --> 00:10:51,060
The rookie cop
who faints at his first autopsy.
159
00:10:51,060 --> 00:10:54,940
The grizzled boss who's really got
a heart of gold.
160
00:10:54,940 --> 00:10:58,900
The maverick loner who wants to
solve one last case
161
00:10:58,900 --> 00:11:00,780
before he retires.
162
00:11:00,780 --> 00:11:03,660
And the new partner
who ruffles his feathers,
163
00:11:03,660 --> 00:11:07,540
but ultimately earns his
respect. Very good!
164
00:11:08,820 --> 00:11:10,220
Right...
165
00:11:11,700 --> 00:11:13,660
I'm going for a pee and a look.
166
00:11:13,660 --> 00:11:16,140
BEEPING
167
00:11:16,140 --> 00:11:17,900
BEEPING STOPS
168
00:11:49,980 --> 00:11:52,380
OVER RADIO: Oscar Nine,
Oscar Nine from Control.
169
00:11:52,380 --> 00:11:53,820
Over.
170
00:11:56,140 --> 00:11:58,420
Control, this is Oscar Nine.
Over.
171
00:11:58,420 --> 00:12:00,500
Oscar Nine,
are you still in position?
172
00:12:00,500 --> 00:12:03,540
Over. Control, this is Special
Constable Varney.
173
00:12:03,540 --> 00:12:06,220
My partner is currently
on a comfort break. Over.
174
00:12:06,220 --> 00:12:08,100
Say again? Over.
175
00:12:11,340 --> 00:12:13,340
Constable Thompson is...
176
00:12:13,340 --> 00:12:15,300
..going tinkles. Over.
177
00:12:15,300 --> 00:12:18,020
You mean he's having a piss?
178
00:12:18,020 --> 00:12:19,700
Over.
179
00:12:19,700 --> 00:12:21,700
That is correct. Over.
180
00:12:23,180 --> 00:12:26,140
Oscar Nine, any movement in the
suspect's flat?
181
00:12:26,140 --> 00:12:27,580
Over.
182
00:12:30,860 --> 00:12:32,500
Uh...
183
00:12:32,500 --> 00:12:34,380
Not that I can see. Over.
184
00:12:37,020 --> 00:12:40,780
And no unusual activity
on the dockside? Over.
185
00:12:43,220 --> 00:12:46,700
Negative.
Uh... It's all quiet. Over.
186
00:12:49,660 --> 00:12:51,980
Well, hold your position
in the car park.
187
00:12:51,980 --> 00:12:54,700
We have intel he might be on the
move in the next few minutes.
188
00:12:54,700 --> 00:12:56,020
Over.
189
00:12:57,060 --> 00:12:58,580
Will do. Out.
190
00:13:04,020 --> 00:13:06,260
BEEPING
191
00:13:07,700 --> 00:13:09,020
BEEPING STOPS
192
00:13:09,020 --> 00:13:10,620
Jesus!
193
00:13:10,620 --> 00:13:14,180
It's colder than a polar bear's
arsehole out there.
194
00:13:14,180 --> 00:13:17,260
Oh... Surprised it didn't
come out as ice cubes.
195
00:13:17,260 --> 00:13:20,340
Thomo, what are we actually
doing here, exactly?
196
00:13:20,340 --> 00:13:22,540
Well, what do you mean?
We're on a stakeout.
197
00:13:22,540 --> 00:13:25,940
Is there any particular suspect
we're meant to be looking for?
198
00:13:25,940 --> 00:13:28,180
Why do you ask? Because I'm
a police constable
199
00:13:28,180 --> 00:13:30,180
and I want to know
what I'm doing here.
200
00:13:30,180 --> 00:13:32,300
You're a SPECIAL constable,
201
00:13:32,300 --> 00:13:35,700
which basically means you're
the Bez to my Shaun Ryder.
202
00:13:35,700 --> 00:13:37,660
So we're not meant to be
at the docks, then?
203
00:13:37,660 --> 00:13:40,300
Course we're not meant
to be at the docks.
204
00:13:40,300 --> 00:13:42,660
Why do you mention docks?
205
00:13:42,660 --> 00:13:44,300
You're twisting my melon, man.
206
00:13:44,300 --> 00:13:46,700
Oscar Nine,
Oscar Nine from Control.
207
00:13:46,700 --> 00:13:50,420
Suspect on the move. Can you confirm
a sighting? Over.
208
00:13:50,420 --> 00:13:52,620
Yes, yes, Control.
209
00:13:52,620 --> 00:13:55,340
This is Oscar Nine,
we are in pursuit. Over.
210
00:13:55,340 --> 00:13:58,220
Right, get the docks up
on your Google maps.
211
00:13:58,220 --> 00:14:00,060
What's going on? Just do it!
212
00:14:00,060 --> 00:14:01,540
ENGINE STARTS
213
00:14:05,420 --> 00:14:07,460
Control, Control from Oscar Nine.
214
00:14:07,460 --> 00:14:09,020
Request airborne surveillance.
215
00:14:09,020 --> 00:14:12,420
The suspect is in camouflage gear
and is really hard to spot.
216
00:14:12,420 --> 00:14:15,380
Over. Oscar Nine from Control,
request received.
217
00:14:15,380 --> 00:14:16,900
Call you back. Out.
218
00:14:16,900 --> 00:14:19,900
Why are you lying to them?
I'm not lying to 'em.
219
00:14:19,900 --> 00:14:22,260
We're on our way, aren't we?
220
00:14:22,260 --> 00:14:23,780
Turn left.
221
00:14:25,340 --> 00:14:27,300
Thomo, I respect your seniority,
222
00:14:27,300 --> 00:14:28,980
but you've got to tell me
what's going on.
223
00:14:28,980 --> 00:14:30,980
There's meant to be
a big drop happening tonight
224
00:14:30,980 --> 00:14:32,780
behind the Old Vic warehouses.
225
00:14:32,780 --> 00:14:36,380
16 boxes of angel dust smuggled in
some indoor barbecues, apparently.
226
00:14:36,380 --> 00:14:38,380
So why have we been
staking out a graveyard?!
227
00:14:38,380 --> 00:14:41,060
Oscar Nine,
Oscar Nine from Control.
228
00:14:41,060 --> 00:14:43,220
What is your position? Over.
229
00:14:43,220 --> 00:14:46,260
Control from Oscar Nine,
suspect is currently head...
230
00:14:46,260 --> 00:14:48,020
..heading south on...
231
00:14:48,020 --> 00:14:49,580
HE GARBLES
232
00:14:49,580 --> 00:14:52,580
Over. Oscar Nine, you are Romeo
One. Say again?
233
00:14:52,580 --> 00:14:56,300
What are you doing? Is it left or
right? Uh, left... Right!
234
00:14:58,340 --> 00:15:00,740
Dobbo was buried in that graveyard.
235
00:15:00,740 --> 00:15:02,940
It was his grave
that was vandalised.
236
00:15:02,940 --> 00:15:05,940
I wanted to be there
in case the fucker came back.
237
00:15:05,940 --> 00:15:07,980
Why?! Because I believe whoever
did it
238
00:15:07,980 --> 00:15:09,580
was the same one that killed him.
239
00:15:09,580 --> 00:15:11,820
They're mocking me.
240
00:15:11,820 --> 00:15:14,700
I'm going to go over
Welling Bridge.
241
00:15:14,700 --> 00:15:17,700
No, no, no, it says to
go through the estate.
242
00:15:17,700 --> 00:15:19,700
What do you mean, it says?
It's miles quicker!
243
00:15:19,700 --> 00:15:21,580
No, well, it...
it says the bridge is up.
244
00:15:21,580 --> 00:15:24,660
It's not! I can see it
with me own eyes! Go left.
245
00:15:26,300 --> 00:15:27,740
Ridiculous.
246
00:15:29,420 --> 00:15:32,220
And what if they find out, Thomo?
What happens to us?
247
00:15:32,220 --> 00:15:34,420
They're not going to find out,
are they?
248
00:15:34,420 --> 00:15:36,060
Cos you're not going to tell 'em.
249
00:15:36,060 --> 00:15:37,820
Are you?
250
00:15:37,820 --> 00:15:39,420
Are you?!
251
00:15:39,420 --> 00:15:40,580
No.
252
00:15:41,940 --> 00:15:44,220
But why didn't you say anything?
253
00:15:44,220 --> 00:15:45,940
Don't you trust me?
254
00:15:45,940 --> 00:15:47,980
Fuckin' hell, I think that's him.
255
00:16:01,220 --> 00:16:02,660
Where's me curry?
256
00:16:02,660 --> 00:16:03,940
I got rid of it!
257
00:16:03,940 --> 00:16:07,460
You what?! It was three days old!
Do you want salmonella?
258
00:16:12,020 --> 00:16:15,260
We're going to get suspended,
aren't we? Dereliction of duty.
259
00:16:15,260 --> 00:16:16,820
Yeah, it's him.
260
00:16:18,860 --> 00:16:21,020
Right, I'll now approach on foot.
No!
261
00:16:21,020 --> 00:16:23,300
Radio through our position
to Control.
262
00:16:23,300 --> 00:16:26,020
Don't worry,
I won't do anything stupid.
263
00:16:26,020 --> 00:16:27,580
Thomo, no.
264
00:16:34,980 --> 00:16:38,100
Control, Control,
this is Oscar Nine. Over.
265
00:16:38,100 --> 00:16:39,980
Oscar Nine, go ahead. Over.
266
00:16:39,980 --> 00:16:42,980
Control, we are on Hedden Road, we
have the subject in our sights.
267
00:16:42,980 --> 00:16:44,900
Maintaining distance. Over.
268
00:16:44,900 --> 00:16:47,540
Oscar Nine, received.
Backup on the way. Over.
269
00:16:47,540 --> 00:16:49,380
Control, nothing more. Out.
270
00:17:36,860 --> 00:17:40,220
OVER RADIO: I'll tell you what,
I'm starting my diet on Monday.
271
00:17:40,220 --> 00:17:41,660
I'm knackered.
272
00:17:46,020 --> 00:17:47,780
Where are you?
273
00:17:47,780 --> 00:17:51,380
I'm just behind the containers
up the side of dog-shit alley.
274
00:17:51,380 --> 00:17:52,940
Can you see him?
275
00:17:52,940 --> 00:17:54,420
Yeah.
276
00:17:54,420 --> 00:17:56,580
He's having a fag.
277
00:17:56,580 --> 00:17:58,940
Backup's on the way.
278
00:18:03,940 --> 00:18:07,340
You mustn't blame yourself
for what happened to DC Dobson.
279
00:18:08,820 --> 00:18:10,900
You could never have stopped it.
280
00:18:10,900 --> 00:18:12,780
It was just one of those things.
281
00:18:14,060 --> 00:18:16,020
I don't need counselling.
282
00:18:20,460 --> 00:18:22,420
At least he was a good cop,
though, yeah?
283
00:18:22,420 --> 00:18:24,780
Wasn't on the take,
or anything.
284
00:18:26,500 --> 00:18:29,460
Oh, hang on, hang on.
Something's happening.
285
00:18:29,460 --> 00:18:30,820
What?
286
00:18:30,820 --> 00:18:32,660
He's making contact.
287
00:18:34,860 --> 00:18:36,420
I need to get a bit closer.
288
00:18:36,420 --> 00:18:38,460
Code 10-3 from now on.
289
00:18:38,460 --> 00:18:39,740
Thomo!
290
00:18:43,820 --> 00:18:45,340
GUNSHOT
291
00:18:45,340 --> 00:18:47,340
GUNSHOTS
292
00:18:49,700 --> 00:18:51,580
Control, Control.
This is Oscar Nine.
293
00:18:51,580 --> 00:18:53,100
Urgent call. Over.
294
00:18:53,100 --> 00:18:55,220
Oscar Nine, go ahead. Over.
295
00:18:55,220 --> 00:18:56,540
Shots fired.
296
00:18:56,540 --> 00:18:59,780
I say again, shots fired.
Where's the backup? Over.
297
00:18:59,780 --> 00:19:02,260
Oscar Nine,
backup is two minutes away.
298
00:19:02,260 --> 00:19:03,980
Two minutes away. Over.
299
00:19:08,460 --> 00:19:11,220
Oscar Nine,
do not approach suspect.
300
00:19:11,220 --> 00:19:12,980
Please acknowledge. Over.
301
00:19:15,380 --> 00:19:17,460
Oscar Nine, acknowledge.
Over.
302
00:19:23,700 --> 00:19:24,860
Oscar Nine from Control.
303
00:19:24,860 --> 00:19:27,100
Instruction -
do not approach suspect.
304
00:19:27,100 --> 00:19:30,140
Backup is on its way.
Please acknowledge. Over.
305
00:19:30,140 --> 00:19:32,260
GUNSHOTS
306
00:19:51,300 --> 00:19:52,740
HE EXHALES
307
00:19:54,500 --> 00:19:56,700
HE BREATHES DEEPLY
308
00:20:00,780 --> 00:20:02,340
TAPPING ON WINDOW
309
00:20:12,140 --> 00:20:14,140
I got you a chai latte.
310
00:20:14,140 --> 00:20:15,900
Why?
311
00:20:15,900 --> 00:20:18,420
It's important to try new things.
312
00:20:18,420 --> 00:20:20,260
Is it good for my blood pressure?
313
00:20:20,260 --> 00:20:21,780
Not particularly.
314
00:20:24,780 --> 00:20:26,340
Cheers.
315
00:20:30,300 --> 00:20:31,620
Oof!
316
00:20:31,620 --> 00:20:33,860
It's like drinking a mince pie.
317
00:20:34,940 --> 00:20:36,860
I thought I'd find you here.
318
00:20:36,860 --> 00:20:40,420
All the others are in the pub
celebrating a record haul.
319
00:20:40,420 --> 00:20:43,460
You had about six pints
lined up. Why me?
320
00:20:43,460 --> 00:20:46,620
It was you who took 'em down.
Never seen owt like it.
321
00:20:46,620 --> 00:20:50,020
It's a good job you were
so quick. Mm.
322
00:20:50,020 --> 00:20:52,540
It's because I don't eat Pringles.
323
00:20:52,540 --> 00:20:55,500
Well, I owe you a beer anyway.
324
00:20:57,900 --> 00:21:00,740
Unfortunately, I don't drink
alcohol either.
325
00:21:00,740 --> 00:21:05,140
Fortunately, they serve
tomato juice.
326
00:21:05,140 --> 00:21:07,980
Unfortunately, special constables
are not invited.
327
00:21:07,980 --> 00:21:11,140
Fortunately, you'll soon be
offered a promotion.
328
00:21:11,140 --> 00:21:13,780
Unfortunately, I'll turn it down.
329
00:21:15,100 --> 00:21:18,300
I'm a bit too long in the tooth
for all that. Well...
330
00:21:18,300 --> 00:21:20,620
..you saved my life.
331
00:21:20,620 --> 00:21:22,180
Fortunately.
332
00:21:22,180 --> 00:21:24,700
So thank you.
333
00:21:26,100 --> 00:21:29,460
It means I'm going to be sat in here
listening to you do riddles again,
334
00:21:29,460 --> 00:21:31,940
unfortunately. Correct.
335
00:21:33,500 --> 00:21:36,100
Actually, I'm giving up
on all that.
336
00:21:36,100 --> 00:21:38,420
It was just a distraction technique.
337
00:21:40,740 --> 00:21:43,140
I'm starting counselling tomorrow.
338
00:21:43,140 --> 00:21:45,740
And I've been googling
yoga classes.
339
00:21:45,740 --> 00:21:48,580
So you've obviously got
under my skin.
340
00:21:50,700 --> 00:21:52,700
Trope number five - tick!
341
00:21:52,700 --> 00:21:54,420
HE CHUCKLES
342
00:21:56,020 --> 00:21:57,340
Anything to report?
343
00:21:57,340 --> 00:21:58,820
Nah.
344
00:22:00,900 --> 00:22:03,140
I thought I saw someone
hanging round by the car
345
00:22:03,140 --> 00:22:06,140
when I came round the corner.
I didn't see anyone.
346
00:22:06,140 --> 00:22:08,420
Must have been a trick of the light.
347
00:22:10,220 --> 00:22:13,020
I hope you don't mind,
but, um,
348
00:22:13,020 --> 00:22:14,980
I was reading your case notes.
349
00:22:16,140 --> 00:22:20,580
You were the last person
to see Dobson alive. Yeah.
350
00:22:20,580 --> 00:22:22,700
I was only gone a few minutes.
351
00:22:24,460 --> 00:22:26,060
Awful.
352
00:22:26,060 --> 00:22:28,620
And you said his grave was
vandalised.
353
00:22:28,620 --> 00:22:31,780
Mm, yeah. They dug it up,
smashed the lid in.
354
00:22:31,780 --> 00:22:33,180
It was horrible.
355
00:22:33,180 --> 00:22:35,780
Do you think whoever did it
was looking for something?
356
00:22:35,780 --> 00:22:38,940
God knows.
None of it makes any sense.
357
00:22:40,940 --> 00:22:44,020
I believe the murder weapon went
missing from forensics.
358
00:22:45,940 --> 00:22:47,380
Did it?
359
00:22:49,020 --> 00:22:50,420
You know it did.
360
00:22:50,420 --> 00:22:51,740
You've got it down there.
361
00:22:51,740 --> 00:22:55,340
What are you playing at, Thomo?
I don't trust 'em.
362
00:22:56,620 --> 00:22:59,460
Let's just say
I wanted a second opinion.
363
00:22:59,460 --> 00:23:01,820
I gave it to a mate of mine
who ran some tests on it.
364
00:23:01,820 --> 00:23:03,460
He said it was an antique.
365
00:23:03,460 --> 00:23:05,580
A rare Victorian stiletto blade.
366
00:23:05,580 --> 00:23:07,500
And how did that get there, eh?
367
00:23:07,500 --> 00:23:10,500
You can't take the law
into your own hands.
368
00:23:10,500 --> 00:23:12,980
It's only been a month.
Let them do their job.
369
00:23:14,780 --> 00:23:18,100
Why are you so fucking
interested all of a sudden?
370
00:23:18,100 --> 00:23:19,380
I want to help you.
371
00:23:23,660 --> 00:23:26,540
Are you wearing a wire? What?!
372
00:23:27,540 --> 00:23:28,700
Who are you?
373
00:23:28,700 --> 00:23:31,100
I don't even know who you are.
374
00:23:31,100 --> 00:23:34,020
If you're wearing a wire,
I swear to God...
375
00:23:34,020 --> 00:23:35,260
Get off! What are you doing?
376
00:23:35,260 --> 00:23:38,020
Well, go on, show me, then!
There, look! Look!
377
00:23:38,020 --> 00:23:39,100
There!
378
00:23:39,100 --> 00:23:41,220
Calm down!
379
00:23:41,220 --> 00:23:43,020
I'm on your side!
380
00:23:45,020 --> 00:23:46,540
Sorry, I just...
381
00:23:48,300 --> 00:23:50,540
I'm not thinking straight.
382
00:23:50,540 --> 00:23:52,500
I've not been sleeping.
383
00:23:52,500 --> 00:23:54,380
I keep seeing his face.
384
00:23:54,380 --> 00:23:56,460
Whose? Dobbo's.
385
00:23:59,340 --> 00:24:01,660
I can't lay it to rest. I...
386
00:24:01,660 --> 00:24:05,020
At least, coming here, I feel like
I'm doing something.
387
00:24:06,780 --> 00:24:08,620
I understand.
388
00:24:11,220 --> 00:24:15,140
And for the record, no, I don't
think you killed your partner.
389
00:24:15,140 --> 00:24:17,780
I think it was one of
those random acts of violence
390
00:24:17,780 --> 00:24:19,300
that we see every day.
391
00:24:21,300 --> 00:24:24,380
Unless you were trying to feed him
that three-day-old curry.
392
00:24:24,380 --> 00:24:26,260
You cheeky bastard!
393
00:24:30,980 --> 00:24:32,980
Oh, God, it's cold tonight.
394
00:24:32,980 --> 00:24:35,940
Do you want a...teabag?
395
00:24:35,940 --> 00:24:38,540
Nah, I've got me chai latte.
396
00:24:38,540 --> 00:24:40,660
No, hand-warmers.
397
00:24:40,660 --> 00:24:43,140
They heat up when you shake them.
398
00:24:43,140 --> 00:24:44,540
Oh, right.
399
00:24:47,900 --> 00:24:51,380
You're oxidising the iron by
producing an exothermic reaction.
400
00:24:54,980 --> 00:24:57,340
I bet this looks bloody
suspicious from outside!
401
00:24:57,340 --> 00:24:59,340
BOTH CHUCKLE
402
00:24:59,340 --> 00:25:02,740
I used to have to look out for
things like this on Hampstead Heath
403
00:25:02,740 --> 00:25:04,740
when I was with the Met.
404
00:25:04,740 --> 00:25:08,460
I remember one time we saw this
Mini Cooper with its lights on...
405
00:25:08,460 --> 00:25:10,300
THUD ON ROOF
406
00:25:16,300 --> 00:25:19,340
What was that?
Don't know. Branch, maybe?
407
00:25:32,020 --> 00:25:33,860
WHISPERS: Wait there.
408
00:25:41,340 --> 00:25:43,540
CLATTERING
409
00:25:56,980 --> 00:25:58,580
THUD
410
00:25:58,580 --> 00:26:00,060
SCRAPING
411
00:26:26,580 --> 00:26:28,740
KNOCK ON WINDOW
Can I come in?
412
00:26:28,740 --> 00:26:30,700
You scared the shit out of me!
413
00:26:30,700 --> 00:26:32,260
Yes!
414
00:26:35,540 --> 00:26:37,620
Did you see anything?
415
00:26:37,620 --> 00:26:39,100
Nothing.
416
00:26:39,100 --> 00:26:41,260
I'm going mad.
417
00:26:41,260 --> 00:26:43,220
I just saw Dobbo again.
418
00:26:44,340 --> 00:26:46,180
He's probably just hungry.
419
00:26:48,300 --> 00:26:49,740
What?
420
00:26:50,780 --> 00:26:53,580
What are these
the top five tropes of?
421
00:26:53,580 --> 00:26:56,700
They sleep in the daytime.
422
00:26:56,700 --> 00:26:59,540
They won't cross running water.
423
00:26:59,540 --> 00:27:01,860
They have to be invited in.
424
00:27:03,020 --> 00:27:05,380
They can't bear the smell of garlic.
425
00:27:06,580 --> 00:27:08,140
And yes...
426
00:27:10,180 --> 00:27:12,380
..we cast no reflection.
427
00:27:12,380 --> 00:27:15,220
I know you didn't kill your partner.
428
00:27:17,340 --> 00:27:19,020
That was me.
429
00:27:20,540 --> 00:27:22,060
THOMO GRUNTS
430
00:27:22,060 --> 00:27:23,460
Argh! No!
431
00:27:23,460 --> 00:27:25,620
Argh!
432
00:27:25,620 --> 00:27:27,660
Stop!
433
00:27:27,660 --> 00:27:29,780
HE GURGLES
434
00:27:29,780 --> 00:27:31,340
HE WHEEZES
435
00:27:31,340 --> 00:27:34,220
HORN BEEPS
436
00:27:34,220 --> 00:27:36,100
SIREN WHOOPS
437
00:28:01,460 --> 00:28:02,500
BANG ON DOOR
438
00:28:02,500 --> 00:28:05,100
SCRAPING AND SCRATCHING
439
00:28:08,100 --> 00:28:10,380
Come in, my child.
440
00:28:10,380 --> 00:28:12,300
Enjoy your first feed.
441
00:28:15,580 --> 00:28:17,980
An eternity of them await you.
442
00:28:22,820 --> 00:28:25,700
HE WHEEZES AND SNIFFS
443
00:28:30,780 --> 00:28:33,060
HE GROWLS
444
00:28:33,060 --> 00:28:35,340
HE SNIFFS
445
00:28:35,340 --> 00:28:37,060
HE SNARLS
446
00:28:47,700 --> 00:28:49,380
HE ROARS
447
00:28:52,420 --> 00:28:56,500
One of the more persistent cliches
of the police procedural
448
00:28:56,500 --> 00:29:00,340
is that the new partner
always winds up dead.
449
00:29:02,260 --> 00:29:06,580
And here I am.
The living embodiment of that trope.
450
00:29:06,580 --> 00:29:09,300
Well...I'm not living any more.
451
00:29:11,300 --> 00:29:13,340
But my story...
452
00:29:13,340 --> 00:29:17,180
..well,
it's as old as time itself.
51095
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