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1
00:01:03,040 --> 00:01:05,096
Jesus Christ!
Sorry, Ref.
2
00:01:05,120 --> 00:01:06,256
The door was open.
3
00:01:06,280 --> 00:01:07,736
What can I do for you, Mitch?
4
00:01:07,760 --> 00:01:09,496
Well, I'm just checking with you
5
00:01:09,520 --> 00:01:11,376
if it's OK for me to be
pitch-side during the match.
6
00:01:11,400 --> 00:01:13,176
You know, get the crowd
going and everything.
7
00:01:13,200 --> 00:01:14,496
Not during the game, no.
8
00:01:14,520 --> 00:01:16,976
Pre-match, half-time only.
9
00:01:17,000 --> 00:01:19,256
It's just that Rovers have brought
Scotty the Shrimp.
10
00:01:19,280 --> 00:01:21,416
I thought we could get a bit
of play-fighting going, you know?
11
00:01:21,440 --> 00:01:24,336
In jest, like, have a laugh.
No, I can't allow it. I'm sorry.
12
00:01:24,360 --> 00:01:25,656
I'm not having the players
distracted by
13
00:01:25,680 --> 00:01:28,136
a six-foot prawn knocking
seven shades of shite
out of a...
14
00:01:28,160 --> 00:01:30,256
..whatever it is you are.
15
00:01:30,280 --> 00:01:31,896
This is not America, Mitch.
16
00:01:31,920 --> 00:01:33,216
I understand.
17
00:01:33,240 --> 00:01:35,856
Hey, it's your last-ever game
today, isn't it?
18
00:01:35,880 --> 00:01:37,136
It is, yes.
19
00:01:37,160 --> 00:01:39,816
Well, I just want to say it's been
an absolute privilege to work
with you.
20
00:01:39,840 --> 00:01:40,896
Fantastic.
21
00:01:40,920 --> 00:01:43,776
And may the best team win.
22
00:01:43,800 --> 00:01:45,320
Indeed.
23
00:01:53,680 --> 00:01:55,696
I'd give it a minute
before you go in there.
24
00:01:55,720 --> 00:01:57,416
A few, er, pre-match nerves.
25
00:01:57,440 --> 00:01:59,416
Well, it's a big game, isn't it?
26
00:01:59,440 --> 00:02:02,496
It is. When I worked
at the San Siro,
27
00:02:02,520 --> 00:02:05,056
the WC was adjacent to the
showers with a separate door,
28
00:02:05,080 --> 00:02:07,136
and it had a self-lowering
lavatory seat.
29
00:02:07,160 --> 00:02:08,416
You felt pampered.
30
00:02:08,440 --> 00:02:10,856
You're really early. What time
is it?
31
00:02:10,880 --> 00:02:12,896
1:58:59.
32
00:02:12,920 --> 00:02:15,816
I like to be fully uniformed
before the captains' meeting.
33
00:02:15,840 --> 00:02:17,736
Gives me that extra degree of
authority.
34
00:02:17,760 --> 00:02:20,376
Most definitely. I've known some
refs slumming round
35
00:02:20,400 --> 00:02:22,176
in sweat pants with a beer
in their hand
36
00:02:22,200 --> 00:02:24,216
at 20 to three like they're at
a family barbecue.
37
00:02:24,240 --> 00:02:27,896
No, you're one of the pros, Martin.
A role model. I've always said it.
38
00:02:27,920 --> 00:02:29,736
That's why you've lasted
as long as you have.
39
00:02:29,760 --> 00:02:31,096
Thank you, Brendan,
I appreciate that.
40
00:02:31,120 --> 00:02:33,416
Was that Mitch I could hear
just now? It was.
41
00:02:33,440 --> 00:02:35,176
I've never seen him out of that
costume.
42
00:02:35,200 --> 00:02:36,896
Do you think he could be
a St Bernard?
43
00:02:36,920 --> 00:02:39,096
Well, I was thinking more chipmunk,
but you might be right.
44
00:02:39,120 --> 00:02:42,736
They have got the shittest
gym here I have ever seen.
45
00:02:42,760 --> 00:02:44,936
My ex-wife's got a better
treadmill in her utility room.
46
00:02:44,960 --> 00:02:46,656
Well, admittedly
the facilities are a little tired,
47
00:02:46,680 --> 00:02:49,976
but if United win promotion today,
that's all gonna change.
48
00:02:50,000 --> 00:02:51,576
That's a big if.
At the San Siro,
49
00:02:51,600 --> 00:02:54,416
they had a treadmill in the
officials' changing room,
and someone came round
50
00:02:54,440 --> 00:02:57,376
every 20 minutes and replenished
the towels. It's the little touches.
51
00:02:57,400 --> 00:02:58,656
Where's Oggy?
52
00:02:58,680 --> 00:03:00,216
Where'd you expect him to be?
53
00:03:00,240 --> 00:03:01,840
Stuffing his face at the
vending machine.
54
00:03:03,120 --> 00:03:04,696
We only had lunch two hours ago.
55
00:03:04,720 --> 00:03:06,736
I mean, the captains'll be here
any minute.
56
00:03:06,760 --> 00:03:08,856
We've got to synchronise our
watches, go through the team
sheet...
57
00:03:08,880 --> 00:03:10,496
Shitting Nora!
58
00:03:10,520 --> 00:03:12,296
Sorry, Phil.
59
00:03:12,320 --> 00:03:13,896
That was me. There's no Glade.
60
00:03:13,920 --> 00:03:16,656
Did a rat crawl up your arse
and die?! Pre-match nerves.
61
00:03:16,680 --> 00:03:18,016
You're the fourth official.
62
00:03:18,040 --> 00:03:20,816
What have you got to be nervous
about? Holding up the wrong numbers
on the board?
63
00:03:20,840 --> 00:03:22,576
Yeah, you may joke,
but that has happened.
64
00:03:22,600 --> 00:03:25,336
Barry Crop once accidentally
signalled for 56 minutes'
65
00:03:25,360 --> 00:03:28,416
added time at a Sheffield derby
game. And it was on Sky.
66
00:03:28,440 --> 00:03:30,576
Took him a good few months
to live that down, I tell you.
67
00:03:30,600 --> 00:03:32,656
At the San Siro... All right,
Brendan, give it a rest,
68
00:03:32,680 --> 00:03:34,280
for fuck's sake!
69
00:03:36,880 --> 00:03:38,400
Sorry.
70
00:03:39,480 --> 00:03:42,976
I'll just, er, go and squirt a few
drops of Aramis in the pan.
71
00:03:43,000 --> 00:03:46,160
See if it'll help, er,
dissimilate the odour.
72
00:03:53,840 --> 00:03:55,816
You shouldn't speak to
Brendan like that.
73
00:03:55,840 --> 00:03:58,376
I heard he's being considered
for the select group next
season,
74
00:03:58,400 --> 00:03:59,736
so you could be working under him.
75
00:03:59,760 --> 00:04:02,736
Is that how you see the assistants?
Under the referee?
76
00:04:02,760 --> 00:04:04,936
I thought we were a team?
We are a team,
77
00:04:04,960 --> 00:04:07,456
and that includes the fourth
official.
78
00:04:07,480 --> 00:04:10,296
If we don't respect ourselves,
how are we gonna get respect
from the players?
79
00:04:10,320 --> 00:04:12,456
He's so boring, though, Martin!
80
00:04:12,480 --> 00:04:13,736
He is boring, yes.
81
00:04:13,760 --> 00:04:15,816
And that's a very good quality
in a referee.
82
00:04:15,840 --> 00:04:18,136
He's anonymously
competent, and that...
83
00:04:18,160 --> 00:04:20,216
..takes guts.
Brendan hasn't got any guts.
84
00:04:20,240 --> 00:04:21,840
He's dropped them all in there!
85
00:04:23,280 --> 00:04:26,760
Right, well, I think that's, er,
taken the edge off it.
86
00:04:28,760 --> 00:04:31,576
Anyway, if anyone should be
nervous, it's me.
87
00:04:31,600 --> 00:04:34,496
Just seen Howard arrive
with half a dozen Qataris.
88
00:04:34,520 --> 00:04:37,136
They've come to cast their
eye over me for 2022.
89
00:04:37,160 --> 00:04:39,816
You don't think it's because
it's one of the biggest games
in English football?
90
00:04:39,840 --> 00:04:41,336
Well, yeah, there is that.
91
00:04:41,360 --> 00:04:42,976
But if it goes well for me today,
92
00:04:43,000 --> 00:04:46,256
I could be running the line
at a World Cup, Martin.
93
00:04:46,280 --> 00:04:48,736
Imagine being able to flag
Neymar offside.
94
00:04:48,760 --> 00:04:50,736
We are not the story, Phil.
95
00:04:50,760 --> 00:04:53,376
We are neutral officiators.
Never forget that.
96
00:04:53,400 --> 00:04:56,760
Yeah, whatever. If I'm not back in
20 minutes, phone for the fire
brigade.
97
00:05:02,160 --> 00:05:03,680
He has got a lot to learn,
that one.
98
00:05:07,360 --> 00:05:09,016
Are those City pants, Brendan?
99
00:05:09,040 --> 00:05:10,176
No!
100
00:05:10,200 --> 00:05:11,600
Clean on this morning.
101
00:05:12,560 --> 00:05:15,376
City. Yes, well we're away
at Preston today.
102
00:05:15,400 --> 00:05:17,336
Should be good for a point at
least, don't you think?
103
00:05:17,360 --> 00:05:18,616
Consolidate a play-off place.
104
00:05:18,640 --> 00:05:20,656
You know my thoughts about team
colours in the changing room.
105
00:05:20,680 --> 00:05:23,296
Yes, but it's the last day of the
season. What with us
being City fans...?
106
00:05:23,320 --> 00:05:24,896
Take them off, please.
107
00:05:24,920 --> 00:05:26,416
Of course.
108
00:05:26,440 --> 00:05:27,880
Sorry, Martin.
109
00:05:32,080 --> 00:05:34,200
It's been a good season for
us, but, er...
110
00:05:35,280 --> 00:05:37,800
..without the investment, you know,
you can't really compete.
111
00:05:38,800 --> 00:05:41,776
Still, if we win today,
we might finish third.
112
00:05:41,800 --> 00:05:44,896
We've always been the
bridesmaid, never the bride.
113
00:05:44,920 --> 00:05:46,336
True.
114
00:05:46,360 --> 00:05:48,776
Without that cash we'll never be up
there playing with the big boys.
115
00:05:48,800 --> 00:05:51,856
If I had a pound for every time
I'd heard you say that, Brendan.
116
00:05:51,880 --> 00:05:53,816
You all right, boss?
How you feeling?
117
00:05:53,840 --> 00:05:56,056
Hey, it's filling up
out there, you know.
118
00:05:56,080 --> 00:05:58,256
You can cut the atmosphere
with a cake slice.
119
00:05:58,280 --> 00:05:59,296
Sorry.
120
00:05:59,320 --> 00:06:01,056
Have you warmed up, Oggy? Yeah.
121
00:06:01,080 --> 00:06:03,776
I did hot yoga in the bath
this morning. I am serious.
122
00:06:03,800 --> 00:06:05,496
Don't worry, boss.
123
00:06:05,520 --> 00:06:06,616
I'll do me stretches.
124
00:06:06,640 --> 00:06:08,056
Where's Phil, anyway?
125
00:06:08,080 --> 00:06:10,096
Doesn't he normally lead
the ref-aerobics around now?
126
00:06:10,120 --> 00:06:12,216
He's shaving.
Yeah, I bet he is.
127
00:06:12,240 --> 00:06:13,296
Bloody Sky's here.
128
00:06:13,320 --> 00:06:15,616
He'll be doing a back, sack
and crack wax, knowing him.
129
00:06:15,640 --> 00:06:18,656
Hey, 20 quid he gels all his
hair up like Gareth Gates.
130
00:06:18,680 --> 00:06:22,016
No betting, Oggy!
You've been warned before.
131
00:06:22,040 --> 00:06:24,296
Only joking! Christ, Martin!
132
00:06:24,320 --> 00:06:26,056
Well, it's not a joking matter,
is it?
133
00:06:26,080 --> 00:06:29,696
What's up with you? This is meant
to be your retirement.
134
00:06:29,720 --> 00:06:30,936
Biggest game of your career.
135
00:06:30,960 --> 00:06:32,976
You should be relishing it.
I am relishing it.
136
00:06:33,000 --> 00:06:35,296
Well, tell your face. It's longer
than one of Brendan's stories.
137
00:06:35,320 --> 00:06:37,056
No offence.
None taken.
138
00:06:37,080 --> 00:06:39,376
We don't all enjoy ourselves
in the same way, Oggy.
139
00:06:39,400 --> 00:06:40,480
All right.
140
00:06:41,440 --> 00:06:44,496
So, goalie for United,
number 1, Charlie Evans.
141
00:06:44,520 --> 00:06:46,056
That's nice and easy.
142
00:06:46,080 --> 00:06:49,096
Back four - Ripley, Price,
Clyne and Cox.
143
00:06:49,120 --> 00:06:51,640
They're your solicitors,
aren't they, Brendan?
144
00:06:52,720 --> 00:06:55,496
Er, midfield is that Polish one
whose name I can never pronounce.
145
00:06:55,520 --> 00:06:57,536
Dzierzanowska.
That's him.
146
00:06:57,560 --> 00:06:59,296
Looks like two bad hands
at Scrabble.
147
00:06:59,320 --> 00:07:01,576
And up front, Calvin Cooke!
148
00:07:01,600 --> 00:07:03,120
I hope you've got his number,
boss.
149
00:07:04,760 --> 00:07:05,800
How d'you mean?
150
00:07:06,800 --> 00:07:08,016
Well, he's got a temper on him.
151
00:07:08,040 --> 00:07:10,600
A lot of inner demons,
from what I've heard.
152
00:07:11,720 --> 00:07:14,296
Well, he'll be here in a
minute, so you can find out
153
00:07:14,320 --> 00:07:15,776
for yourself, can't you?
154
00:07:15,800 --> 00:07:17,416
Right, can we synchronise
watches, please?
155
00:07:17,440 --> 00:07:18,696
We don't have to do that.
156
00:07:18,720 --> 00:07:20,296
It's not Mission: Impossible.
157
00:07:20,320 --> 00:07:24,216
I've got 14:02 and 52 seconds.
158
00:07:24,240 --> 00:07:26,096
Er, six minutes past two...
159
00:07:26,120 --> 00:07:29,696
And let's synchronise, please.
56 seconds, 57...
160
00:07:29,720 --> 00:07:31,296
BEEPING Hang on, hang on.
161
00:07:31,320 --> 00:07:32,896
I can only put this one
forwards, it won't go back.
162
00:07:32,920 --> 00:07:35,736
For God's sake!
It's three o'clock kick-off,
163
00:07:35,760 --> 00:07:37,336
quarter to four for a pie
and a piss,
164
00:07:37,360 --> 00:07:39,536
ten to five, final score
and get first round in.
165
00:07:39,560 --> 00:07:40,576
It's not rocket science.
166
00:07:40,600 --> 00:07:43,896
Fuckin' lukewarm water and
the shampoo's like dog spunk.
167
00:07:43,920 --> 00:07:45,456
Why hasn't this club
got any money?
168
00:07:45,480 --> 00:07:47,256
Hey! They're like a old bra -
169
00:07:47,280 --> 00:07:49,616
no cups and crap support.
I thank you!
170
00:07:49,640 --> 00:07:51,776
They had Aveda products
throughout at the San Siro.
171
00:07:51,800 --> 00:07:53,376
It's like a boutique hotel.
172
00:07:53,400 --> 00:07:56,336
Do we know if Sky are showing
this in 4K or just in HD?
173
00:07:56,360 --> 00:07:58,216
I don't know. can we just...
There you go!
174
00:07:58,240 --> 00:07:59,696
What did I tell you? 20 quid.
175
00:07:59,720 --> 00:08:01,816
Worried about your bald spot,
Phil? Fuck off, Oggy!
176
00:08:01,840 --> 00:08:03,296
Can we
synchronise watches, please?
177
00:08:03,320 --> 00:08:04,896
Hey, I saw you on the
treadmill earlier
178
00:08:04,920 --> 00:08:06,576
practising your backwards
running.
179
00:08:06,600 --> 00:08:09,176
Bullshit.
It's true!
180
00:08:09,200 --> 00:08:12,096
He practises running backwards doing
his Collina face so he can get
181
00:08:12,120 --> 00:08:13,336
a nice big close-up on TV.
182
00:08:13,360 --> 00:08:15,416
No, it's so I can get better
peripheral vision.
183
00:08:15,440 --> 00:08:18,336
It's better than you chugging up and
down like Mr fuckin' Creosote.
184
00:08:18,360 --> 00:08:20,640
Is that right? Mr
Creosote? Guys, please!
185
00:08:23,280 --> 00:08:27,896
If United win today, they get
automatic promotion
to the Premier League.
186
00:08:27,920 --> 00:08:30,496
With merit payments and TV
rights, that's a huge windfall.
187
00:08:30,520 --> 00:08:32,936
150 million, according to
The Mirror. Exactly.
188
00:08:32,960 --> 00:08:34,296
And if Rovers win, they avoid
189
00:08:34,320 --> 00:08:37,096
relegation into the lower leagues
and financial oblivion.
190
00:08:37,120 --> 00:08:40,976
So it's up to us to work as a
team to ensure a fair result.
191
00:08:41,000 --> 00:08:43,176
You know, it's going to be
tense enough out there
192
00:08:43,200 --> 00:08:45,656
without you two glaring at
each other across the pitch
193
00:08:45,680 --> 00:08:47,360
like Bette Davis and Joan
Crawford.
194
00:08:48,440 --> 00:08:49,456
He started it.
195
00:08:49,480 --> 00:08:51,280
"He started
it." I don't care!
196
00:08:52,480 --> 00:08:56,800
We have to be beyond reproach
in every decision we make.
197
00:08:58,040 --> 00:09:00,360
So show some professionalism.
198
00:09:02,080 --> 00:09:03,296
Calvin, come in.
199
00:09:03,320 --> 00:09:04,896
Is Nico with you?
200
00:09:04,920 --> 00:09:06,536
Haven't seen him. Oggy,
go and get Nico, will you?
201
00:09:06,560 --> 00:09:09,936
Tell him he's already three
minutes late for
the captains' meeting.
202
00:09:09,960 --> 00:09:13,760
And you, go and do your
manscaping, or whatever it is
you do in there.
203
00:09:14,880 --> 00:09:16,776
You, check the match ball.
204
00:09:16,800 --> 00:09:18,976
I want it 12.5 psi.
205
00:09:19,000 --> 00:09:20,160
Yes, Ref. Sorry.
206
00:09:24,120 --> 00:09:25,176
What's this?
207
00:09:25,200 --> 00:09:26,416
Retirement card.
208
00:09:26,440 --> 00:09:28,096
What, from you
or the whole team?
209
00:09:28,120 --> 00:09:29,296
What do you think?
210
00:09:29,320 --> 00:09:31,656
Hardly going to be walking around
with my own card for you, am I?
211
00:09:31,680 --> 00:09:33,136
So, big game.
212
00:09:33,160 --> 00:09:34,256
Yeah. Yeah.
213
00:09:34,280 --> 00:09:35,656
How you feeling?
214
00:09:35,680 --> 00:09:36,936
I'm OK.
215
00:09:36,960 --> 00:09:38,040
Can I kiss you?
216
00:09:42,760 --> 00:09:45,216
What happened to your rules?
217
00:09:45,240 --> 00:09:46,896
Please.
218
00:09:46,920 --> 00:09:49,400
It's a big game for me as well,
you know.
219
00:10:01,840 --> 00:10:04,016
So now...
..you've just gotta give us
220
00:10:04,040 --> 00:10:05,736
a couple of penalties, right?
221
00:10:05,760 --> 00:10:07,416
I'd love it if I could. But I can't.
222
00:10:07,440 --> 00:10:09,896
Not even if there's tugging in
the box? Don't even joke about it.
223
00:10:09,920 --> 00:10:12,936
If the PGMOL ever found out...
You're retiring!
224
00:10:12,960 --> 00:10:14,336
Yeah, but it's my reputation,
isn't it?
225
00:10:14,360 --> 00:10:16,056
Not to mention the legal
consequences.
226
00:10:16,080 --> 00:10:17,816
I mean not just for me,
but for the club!
227
00:10:17,840 --> 00:10:19,896
Martin, nobody's gonna find out.
228
00:10:19,920 --> 00:10:21,200
Relax.
229
00:10:22,600 --> 00:10:24,120
I've got your back.
230
00:10:27,560 --> 00:10:28,840
I love you.
231
00:10:31,760 --> 00:10:34,536
Nico, nice of you to join us.
232
00:10:34,560 --> 00:10:36,896
Right, now, I want a good
clean game
233
00:10:36,920 --> 00:10:39,256
with plenty of flow and all the
focus on the football.
234
00:10:39,280 --> 00:10:41,936
Everybody on that pitch
knows the laws of the game.
235
00:10:41,960 --> 00:10:44,576
And if we stick to that, there's no
reason we can't have a fitting,
236
00:10:44,600 --> 00:10:47,056
dignified, trouble-free end
to the season.
237
00:10:47,080 --> 00:10:48,960
Understand?
238
00:10:59,760 --> 00:11:02,376
The referee's a wanker!
The referee's a wanker!
239
00:11:02,400 --> 00:11:04,216
Get him under
control, you flaming animal!
240
00:11:04,240 --> 00:11:05,616
Oggy!
He chucked a bap at me!
241
00:11:05,640 --> 00:11:07,696
A what?
A bap! A bacon bap!
242
00:11:07,720 --> 00:11:09,776
Who did? That Polish one.
Dirty bastard.
243
00:11:09,800 --> 00:11:11,496
Dzierzanowska?
Yeah, that's him.
244
00:11:11,520 --> 00:11:13,576
Flaming animal! I want his
name in the book.
245
00:11:13,600 --> 00:11:15,416
If you can frigging spell it..
You're bleeding.
246
00:11:15,440 --> 00:11:17,336
No, it's just ketchup.
247
00:11:17,360 --> 00:11:19,016
What should I put
in the report, Martin?
248
00:11:19,040 --> 00:11:22,136
Just put, "Food thrown in tunnel."
We'll see what the damage is later.
249
00:11:22,160 --> 00:11:25,256
At the San Siro, the ushers
escorted you all the way
down the tunnel.
250
00:11:25,280 --> 00:11:26,776
And we had our own
espresso machine.
251
00:11:26,800 --> 00:11:29,256
This was before they became
commonplace. They're more
ubiquitous than kettles now.
252
00:11:29,280 --> 00:11:31,176
Where's Phil?
He got collared by Mitch.
253
00:11:31,200 --> 00:11:33,016
He was trying to show him
video replay on his phone.
254
00:11:33,040 --> 00:11:35,096
Well, he shouldn't be
looking at that! I know,
255
00:11:35,120 --> 00:11:36,576
but Phil is a pro. I'm sure he can
handle himself.
256
00:11:36,600 --> 00:11:38,736
Did you notice how he went
and picked up the match ball
257
00:11:38,760 --> 00:11:40,136
soon as you blew the whistle?
258
00:11:40,160 --> 00:11:41,536
The he just stood there
with his chin up
259
00:11:41,560 --> 00:11:43,136
waiting for the Steadicam guy
to circle round him?
260
00:11:43,160 --> 00:11:44,656
Oggy's right. That's not
protocol.
261
00:11:44,680 --> 00:11:46,576
He wears eyeliner, you know.
No, he doesn't.
262
00:11:46,600 --> 00:11:47,976
Yes, he does!
263
00:11:48,000 --> 00:11:49,096
Did you not see him when
they had
264
00:11:49,120 --> 00:11:50,936
that minute's silence
for Butch Wilkins last year?
265
00:11:50,960 --> 00:11:52,616
It was running all down
his face!
266
00:11:52,640 --> 00:11:54,320
Linesman Minnelli, they
called him.
267
00:11:56,840 --> 00:11:58,216
It was a goal, wasn't it?
268
00:11:58,240 --> 00:11:59,336
It was a clear goal.
269
00:11:59,360 --> 00:12:01,376
There wasn't a hint of offside?
Not a chance.
270
00:12:01,400 --> 00:12:03,776
I think what they were
contesting was the throw-in.
271
00:12:03,800 --> 00:12:06,056
Don't look at me.
I was six foot away.
272
00:12:06,080 --> 00:12:08,576
That was a throw-in all day,
every day.
273
00:12:08,600 --> 00:12:10,696
Did you see it?
No, I was on the far side.
274
00:12:10,720 --> 00:12:12,816
And you're sure
it was a throw-in?
275
00:12:12,840 --> 00:12:15,176
May God strike me down.
276
00:12:15,200 --> 00:12:16,976
It was 18 inches off the line.
277
00:12:17,000 --> 00:12:18,616
What, in or out?
In!
278
00:12:18,640 --> 00:12:20,336
I've just seen the replay.
Shit!
279
00:12:20,360 --> 00:12:22,976
Nah, that's impossible. I saw it
cross with my own eyes.
280
00:12:23,000 --> 00:12:24,496
You should have gone to
Specsavers, then,
shouldn't you?
281
00:12:24,520 --> 00:12:25,656
Calvin wanted to talk to you
282
00:12:25,680 --> 00:12:27,056
but I told him he'd have to
wait until after the game.
283
00:12:27,080 --> 00:12:29,456
Yeah, well, quite right. It's only
half-time, for goodness' sake.
284
00:12:29,480 --> 00:12:30,536
Anything could happen yet!
285
00:12:30,560 --> 00:12:32,576
What did he say?
He's fuming!
286
00:12:32,600 --> 00:12:36,176
Mitch the fuckin' Meerkat
keeps on showing everyone
the footage on his phone.
287
00:12:36,200 --> 00:12:37,776
What do you mean, meerkat?
He's an otter!
288
00:12:37,800 --> 00:12:39,496
How can he be an otter?!
289
00:12:39,520 --> 00:12:41,056
Otters are mustelids with tiny
ears.
290
00:12:41,080 --> 00:12:42,736
All right, David
fucking Attenborough!
291
00:12:42,760 --> 00:12:45,176
I always thought he was a tadpole,
but it never sat right with me.
292
00:12:45,200 --> 00:12:46,216
It'll blow over.
293
00:12:46,240 --> 00:12:47,736
Yes. I don't even think
Mitch knows what he is.
294
00:12:47,760 --> 00:12:48,816
No, I mean the throw-in!
295
00:12:48,840 --> 00:12:51,016
It's just one of those
decisions, isn't it?
296
00:12:51,040 --> 00:12:52,616
You know, some go for you,
some go against you.
297
00:12:52,640 --> 00:12:54,960
During the season, they just
even themselves out.
298
00:12:56,160 --> 00:12:57,760
No, I don't...
I don't think they do.
299
00:13:00,440 --> 00:13:03,136
What time was the goal?
Er...
300
00:13:03,160 --> 00:13:05,056
..27 minutes.
301
00:13:05,080 --> 00:13:07,296
Which means the throw-in
was at 26 minutes, right?
302
00:13:07,320 --> 00:13:09,936
Well, I don't know. I don't time
every throw-in, do I?
303
00:13:09,960 --> 00:13:11,776
Well, somebody does!
304
00:13:11,800 --> 00:13:13,856
Don't they, Oggy?
305
00:13:13,880 --> 00:13:15,720
What are you on about?
306
00:13:17,240 --> 00:13:18,776
Martin, can I have a word?
307
00:13:18,800 --> 00:13:21,536
No, no, if you've got something
to say, let's say it here.
308
00:13:21,560 --> 00:13:23,136
All right.
309
00:13:23,160 --> 00:13:24,856
In-play betting.
310
00:13:24,880 --> 00:13:26,856
Every corner, every goal,
311
00:13:26,880 --> 00:13:28,656
every free kick - you can bet
on anything these days.
312
00:13:28,680 --> 00:13:29,976
I know what in-play betting is!
313
00:13:30,000 --> 00:13:33,376
Right, so if a betting syndicate
from the Far East, say,
314
00:13:33,400 --> 00:13:36,576
could guarantee exactly what time
a throw-in would be awarded to
315
00:13:36,600 --> 00:13:38,520
a certain team, well...
316
00:13:39,560 --> 00:13:41,760
..a small fortune could be made.
317
00:13:45,280 --> 00:13:47,176
Are you making an allegation here?
318
00:13:47,200 --> 00:13:48,376
He's talking out of his arse.
319
00:13:48,400 --> 00:13:50,056
It happens all the time in Italy.
In the San Siro...
320
00:13:50,080 --> 00:13:52,936
Will you stop going on
about the shitting San Siro!
321
00:13:52,960 --> 00:13:56,656
You were a backup referee at
an under-14s friendly in 1992!
322
00:13:56,680 --> 00:13:57,776
Under 17s.
323
00:13:57,800 --> 00:14:01,536
You didn't even get on the pitch!
Envy eats nothing but its own heart.
324
00:14:01,560 --> 00:14:03,800
What?! How come you know
so much about it?
325
00:14:05,960 --> 00:14:08,080
Because I was approached
to take the same bung.
326
00:14:10,120 --> 00:14:14,216
15K if I awarded Rovers a throw-in
at exactly 26 minutes.
327
00:14:14,240 --> 00:14:15,760
Easy money, the guy said.
328
00:14:17,560 --> 00:14:19,576
But I told him no way.
329
00:14:19,600 --> 00:14:22,040
Well... that's just
a coincidence.
330
00:14:23,720 --> 00:14:25,336
Big fucking coincidence.
You see -
331
00:14:25,360 --> 00:14:28,096
this is why we need VAR as
standard. Then we wouldn't
be in this pickle.
332
00:14:28,120 --> 00:14:29,520
Not now, Brendan.
333
00:14:31,840 --> 00:14:34,720
Did you take that money, Oggy?
334
00:14:35,880 --> 00:14:37,720
I need you to tell me
the truth now.
335
00:14:40,320 --> 00:14:43,280
Now, I can call the police in
here, we can have this game
abandoned.
336
00:14:48,280 --> 00:14:49,360
It was only a throw-in!
337
00:14:50,680 --> 00:14:52,336
I didn't think it would matter
that much either way.
338
00:14:52,360 --> 00:14:55,416
My giddy aunt,
I am not hearing this!
339
00:14:55,440 --> 00:14:57,376
I didn't know they were gonna
go and score off the back of
it, did I?
340
00:14:57,400 --> 00:14:58,776
It was a foot and a half in!
341
00:14:58,800 --> 00:15:00,016
I panicked!
342
00:15:00,040 --> 00:15:02,616
They said if I didn't comply,
something bad would happen to me.
343
00:15:02,640 --> 00:15:04,216
What, they'd unplug the
vending machines?
344
00:15:04,240 --> 00:15:07,536
Martin, please.
It's your last-ever game.
345
00:15:07,560 --> 00:15:09,056
I'll split the money with you.
346
00:15:09,080 --> 00:15:11,256
I-I-I'll give it to charity.
347
00:15:11,280 --> 00:15:12,816
Just don't dob me in it, please!
348
00:15:12,840 --> 00:15:13,976
Just let me think, will you?
349
00:15:14,000 --> 00:15:16,120
Why did you do it, Oggy?
350
00:15:17,240 --> 00:15:20,016
We get treated like shit
week in, week out.
351
00:15:20,040 --> 00:15:22,736
Spat at by so-called fans,
352
00:15:22,760 --> 00:15:24,456
abused by players, managers,
353
00:15:24,480 --> 00:15:26,440
then the pundits weigh in and...
354
00:15:27,680 --> 00:15:30,576
..suddenly your kids
are getting bullied at school.
355
00:15:30,600 --> 00:15:32,816
That's no excuse, Oggy.
356
00:15:34,040 --> 00:15:35,856
What the fuck is going on
with you lot today?
357
00:15:35,880 --> 00:15:38,376
Have you seen this footage?
Calvin, you cannot be in here!
358
00:15:38,400 --> 00:15:41,976
There's no way that that's over
the line. Look. Look!
359
00:15:42,000 --> 00:15:43,696
We're not permitted to see that
footage until after the game.
360
00:15:43,720 --> 00:15:46,296
Are you kidding me, Martin?
Are you fucking
361
00:15:46,320 --> 00:15:47,776
kidding me?!
Please, Calvin.
362
00:15:47,800 --> 00:15:50,160
Where is he? Where
is he?!
363
00:15:52,480 --> 00:15:54,616
I'll rip his fucking head off!
364
00:15:54,640 --> 00:15:55,776
Mitchell, out! Linesman?!
365
00:15:55,800 --> 00:15:57,936
Call yourself a linesman?
Have you seen that?
366
00:15:57,960 --> 00:15:59,416
You could drive a fuckin' bus
through that gap!
367
00:15:59,440 --> 00:16:00,896
Martin, you have to say
something! Come on, man!
368
00:16:00,920 --> 00:16:02,296
At least send him out there
to apologise.
369
00:16:02,320 --> 00:16:04,856
What, so I can have food
thrown in me face again?
370
00:16:04,880 --> 00:16:06,176
You'd enjoy that, wouldn't you?
371
00:16:06,200 --> 00:16:07,536
You'd eat it, you fat git!
372
00:16:07,560 --> 00:16:09,496
Say that again, you...
373
00:16:09,520 --> 00:16:12,336
ALL YELLING Say it to my face!
374
00:16:12,360 --> 00:16:14,056
Go on, say it again!
375
00:16:14,080 --> 00:16:15,976
Go on!
376
00:16:22,240 --> 00:16:23,440
What are you doing?
377
00:16:24,720 --> 00:16:27,976
You're off!
You're out the game!
378
00:16:28,000 --> 00:16:29,056
You can't do that!
379
00:16:29,080 --> 00:16:31,336
You can't do that.
He can't do that, it's half-time!
380
00:16:31,360 --> 00:16:33,456
Course he can.
Brendan, tell him!
381
00:16:33,480 --> 00:16:36,736
Law 12. The referee
has the authority to
take disciplinary action
382
00:16:36,760 --> 00:16:39,136
from entering the field of play
for the pre-match inspection
383
00:16:39,160 --> 00:16:41,136
until leaving the field of play
at the end of the match.
384
00:16:41,160 --> 00:16:42,976
This is a conspiracy!
385
00:16:43,000 --> 00:16:46,280
You should be whipped, the
lot of you! Martin, you can't.
386
00:16:47,320 --> 00:16:49,856
If I meant to show him the yellow
card, I can change my mind, can't I?
387
00:16:49,880 --> 00:16:52,456
You've already booked him once,
Martin, it's a dismissal either way.
388
00:16:52,480 --> 00:16:54,296
I want him red-carded -
violent conduct!
389
00:16:54,320 --> 00:16:57,016
Yeah? Well, it's nothing to do
with you, is it, knobhead?!
390
00:16:57,040 --> 00:16:58,320
Get him out of here!
391
00:17:00,880 --> 00:17:02,160
Get my head!
392
00:17:10,560 --> 00:17:11,920
Martin, you can't...
393
00:17:13,560 --> 00:17:15,656
Not in this match, not today.
Please!
394
00:17:15,680 --> 00:17:17,456
Well, I'm sorry, Calvin.
It's the laws of the game.
395
00:17:17,480 --> 00:17:19,416
So, you know,
it's a straight red.
396
00:17:19,440 --> 00:17:21,360
A straight red?
397
00:17:24,680 --> 00:17:27,160
Well, that's the only straight
thing about you, then, isn't it?
398
00:17:31,640 --> 00:17:34,616
You've sucked my cock for the last
time, Martin, do you understand?
399
00:17:34,640 --> 00:17:36,000
You're pathetic.
400
00:17:37,480 --> 00:17:39,520
Don't call me again!
401
00:17:51,080 --> 00:17:55,576
The referee's a
wanker! The referee's a wanker!
402
00:17:55,600 --> 00:18:00,376
The referee's a wanker!
The referee's a wanker!
403
00:18:00,400 --> 00:18:03,696
The referee's a wanker!
404
00:18:03,720 --> 00:18:07,536
The referee's a wanker!
The referee's a wanker!
405
00:18:07,560 --> 00:18:09,696
The referee's a wanker!
406
00:18:09,720 --> 00:18:11,840
I'll put all that
in the report, or...?
407
00:18:16,520 --> 00:18:19,680
Just put Number 9, Cooke,
dismissed for violent conduct.
408
00:18:25,760 --> 00:18:27,840
Martin...
Don't.
409
00:18:29,280 --> 00:18:31,360
Just don't.
410
00:18:35,160 --> 00:18:39,120
What are we going to do
about... the other thing?
411
00:18:43,200 --> 00:18:46,056
Did you report that approach
to the FA, Phil?
412
00:18:46,080 --> 00:18:47,496
Course not.
413
00:18:47,520 --> 00:18:49,736
I was scared of ruining my
chances for the World Cup.
414
00:18:49,760 --> 00:18:51,616
Right, then, in that case
we just...
415
00:18:51,640 --> 00:18:52,880
..make things even.
416
00:18:54,920 --> 00:18:56,336
Martin, I don't think...
417
00:18:56,360 --> 00:18:59,976
If the opportunity comes to give
United a goal, I'm going to take it,
418
00:19:00,000 --> 00:19:02,176
be it an offside or a penalty
or whatever,
419
00:19:02,200 --> 00:19:05,336
and I want you lot to back me
up. Do you understand?
420
00:19:05,360 --> 00:19:07,616
It's just about being fair
and proper.
421
00:19:07,640 --> 00:19:10,576
Sorry, but how is that fair
and proper?
422
00:19:10,600 --> 00:19:12,296
If he hadn't awarded that
throw-in to Rovers,
423
00:19:12,320 --> 00:19:14,136
they wouldn't have scored and it
would have been 0-0,
wouldn't it?
424
00:19:14,160 --> 00:19:15,976
So we're just evening things up.
425
00:19:16,000 --> 00:19:17,976
Whoever wins after that,
well, good luck to them.
426
00:19:18,000 --> 00:19:21,536
This is... highly irregular,
Martin.
427
00:19:21,560 --> 00:19:22,976
Are you're sure that...
428
00:19:23,000 --> 00:19:25,376
..your judgment hasn't been
coloured by...
429
00:19:25,400 --> 00:19:26,800
..you know?
430
00:19:29,120 --> 00:19:30,280
By what?
431
00:19:32,200 --> 00:19:33,776
Calvin.
432
00:19:33,800 --> 00:19:35,096
The fact you just suc...
433
00:19:35,120 --> 00:19:36,400
Sent him off.
434
00:19:37,840 --> 00:19:39,800
I've done nothing wrong.
435
00:19:41,880 --> 00:19:44,496
My whole career has been
above board and by the book.
436
00:19:44,520 --> 00:19:46,896
Yet you're about to gift a goal
to United.
437
00:19:46,920 --> 00:19:48,520
My conscience is clear.
438
00:19:50,040 --> 00:19:53,096
Now, if any of you want to report
what's happened and go to the FA,
439
00:19:53,120 --> 00:19:55,376
then say so now
440
00:19:55,400 --> 00:19:57,576
and we'll stop this game.
441
00:19:57,600 --> 00:19:59,120
Well?
442
00:20:04,440 --> 00:20:07,016
We'd better get back out there.
443
00:20:07,040 --> 00:20:08,616
The crowd are going to give
you some stick, Martin.
444
00:20:08,640 --> 00:20:10,656
That's nothing I can't handle.
445
00:20:10,680 --> 00:20:14,336
Gentlemen, let's get out there
446
00:20:14,360 --> 00:20:16,600
and restore some sanity.
447
00:20:39,480 --> 00:20:42,456
There's all sorts of reports
coming out of Wallis Park
448
00:20:42,480 --> 00:20:45,456
at the moment, where the match
between United and Rovers
449
00:20:45,480 --> 00:20:47,416
was abandoned 12 minutes
from time.
450
00:20:47,440 --> 00:20:49,656
Let's go to our reporter there,
Eamonn Travers.
451
00:20:49,680 --> 00:20:51,736
Eamonn, is the picture
any clearer yet?
452
00:20:51,760 --> 00:20:54,736
No, John. As you say, rumours
spreading here like wildfire.
453
00:20:54,760 --> 00:20:56,896
There have been allegations
of match-fixing,
454
00:20:56,920 --> 00:20:59,496
collusion with the officials,
and even, shall we say,
455
00:20:59,520 --> 00:21:02,696
a personal relationship between
a key player for United
456
00:21:02,720 --> 00:21:04,816
and the referee
Martin Rutherford.
457
00:21:04,840 --> 00:21:07,696
The trouble started, well,
it started in the first half
458
00:21:07,720 --> 00:21:09,816
with that controversial goal
for Rovers
459
00:21:09,840 --> 00:21:13,376
and the mysterious dismissal
at half-time of the United
captain Calvin Cooke,
460
00:21:13,400 --> 00:21:16,256
but it was compounded by an
extraordinary second half
461
00:21:16,280 --> 00:21:19,576
which saw Rutherford award a frankly
ludicrous penalty to United,
462
00:21:19,600 --> 00:21:21,976
which was missed,
and ordered to be retaken,
463
00:21:22,000 --> 00:21:24,976
not once, not twice,
but three times
464
00:21:25,000 --> 00:21:26,776
until Kirby scored to level
the game.
465
00:21:26,800 --> 00:21:29,960
This led to a mass brawl on
the pitch, five red cards...
466
00:21:32,240 --> 00:21:35,056
The press are going to have
an absolute field day with this.
467
00:21:35,080 --> 00:21:37,376
Are you kidding?
They already are.
468
00:21:37,400 --> 00:21:40,336
Robbie Savage has just been
on, tearing us to shreds.
469
00:21:40,360 --> 00:21:43,600
He even had a go at my hair, which
is the pot calling the kettle black.
470
00:21:44,760 --> 00:21:46,256
How's Martin?
471
00:21:46,280 --> 00:21:48,056
He's shaken but philosophical.
472
00:21:48,080 --> 00:21:50,536
I think he's aware his legacy
is somewhat tarnished.
473
00:21:50,560 --> 00:21:54,896
Somewhat? He's the Lance
Armstrong of football referees.
474
00:21:54,920 --> 00:21:56,216
He's fucked himself.
475
00:21:56,240 --> 00:21:58,216
Not... anatomically.
476
00:21:58,240 --> 00:22:00,896
Or professionally, as long
as we all stick together.
477
00:22:00,920 --> 00:22:03,536
He can't be blamed for them
players fighting like that.
478
00:22:03,560 --> 00:22:06,816
Brendan, he gave a penalty
for a handball
479
00:22:06,840 --> 00:22:08,016
against the goalkeeper!
480
00:22:08,040 --> 00:22:10,696
Well, he didn't know it
was the keeper, did he?
481
00:22:10,720 --> 00:22:13,096
What, the one in the big
bright red shirt with gloves on
482
00:22:13,120 --> 00:22:14,976
leaping through the air like
Superman?
483
00:22:15,000 --> 00:22:16,976
I think even Arsene Wenger
might have spotted that one.
484
00:22:17,000 --> 00:22:19,016
He was trying to even things up.
485
00:22:19,040 --> 00:22:20,456
Just cancel out Oggy's mistake.
486
00:22:20,480 --> 00:22:22,256
We are going to stand by him,
aren't we?
487
00:22:22,280 --> 00:22:23,960
Well... like I say.
488
00:22:25,080 --> 00:22:26,600
He's fucked himself.
489
00:22:31,800 --> 00:22:33,480
They want to speak to you
next, Phil.
490
00:22:35,240 --> 00:22:37,176
Is Howard there?
Yeah.
491
00:22:37,200 --> 00:22:38,960
And the police.
492
00:22:40,640 --> 00:22:42,400
It's a criminal matter now,
apparently.
493
00:22:43,680 --> 00:22:45,120
Christ.
494
00:22:46,680 --> 00:22:48,576
Are the Qataris still here?
495
00:22:48,600 --> 00:22:50,976
You mean the Arabs?
I didn't see any.
496
00:22:51,000 --> 00:22:52,560
Fuck's sake!
497
00:22:53,920 --> 00:22:56,000
If this costs me my World Cup
spot...
498
00:22:57,080 --> 00:22:59,056
I've always liked you, Phil.
499
00:22:59,080 --> 00:23:00,440
You know that, don't you?
500
00:23:01,520 --> 00:23:04,096
Not in a Martin and Calvin
kind of way,
501
00:23:04,120 --> 00:23:06,056
more like professional....
502
00:23:06,080 --> 00:23:08,096
..respect.
503
00:23:08,120 --> 00:23:10,280
You won't dob me in it,
will you?
504
00:23:11,560 --> 00:23:13,320
Please.
505
00:23:21,720 --> 00:23:23,576
He's going to tell them
everything, isn't he?
506
00:23:23,600 --> 00:23:25,136
Course he is.
507
00:23:25,160 --> 00:23:28,376
He'll sing like a canary on The X
Factor to save his own skin.
508
00:23:28,400 --> 00:23:30,880
You'd better get yourself
a solicitor, pal.
509
00:23:32,040 --> 00:23:35,296
Whatever happened to
"What happens in the ref's
room stays in the ref's room"?
510
00:23:35,320 --> 00:23:36,776
Nah, different game now.
511
00:23:36,800 --> 00:23:38,856
You know when the rot set in?
512
00:23:38,880 --> 00:23:41,600
When they started putting
us in coloured jerseys.
513
00:23:42,720 --> 00:23:44,976
Back in the day
you were the Man in Black.
514
00:23:45,000 --> 00:23:48,496
Big characters like George
Courtney. Keith Hackett.
515
00:23:48,520 --> 00:23:50,176
Yes. Men to be feared.
516
00:23:50,200 --> 00:23:54,216
Then the television money came in
and they demanded more colour.
517
00:23:54,240 --> 00:23:56,456
Pinks, greens, burgundies.
518
00:23:56,480 --> 00:24:00,416
We look more like Showaddywaddy
than football referees.
519
00:24:00,440 --> 00:24:02,656
Sports entertainment.
520
00:24:02,680 --> 00:24:05,456
No, it's all about the money
now.
521
00:24:05,480 --> 00:24:07,256
As you well know, Oggy.
522
00:24:07,280 --> 00:24:10,000
And that 15 grand won't take
you very far through the courts.
523
00:24:11,280 --> 00:24:14,656
I don't even think it was
an eastern betting syndicate.
524
00:24:14,680 --> 00:24:17,600
I think it was just one man
putting a voice on.
525
00:24:18,840 --> 00:24:22,840
Now I think of it, he
sounded more like Benny Hill
doing Mr Chow Mein.
526
00:24:24,280 --> 00:24:26,936
All right, boss? How's your
eye? Looks painful.
527
00:24:26,960 --> 00:24:28,280
Yeah, stings a bit, you know.
528
00:24:29,880 --> 00:24:31,376
Where's Phil?
529
00:24:31,400 --> 00:24:34,096
He's... He's giving his
statement to...
530
00:24:34,120 --> 00:24:36,000
..to Howard and the police.
531
00:24:37,520 --> 00:24:39,656
Well, bang goes my pension,
then?
532
00:24:39,680 --> 00:24:41,456
I don't think they can, er,
533
00:24:41,480 --> 00:24:44,136
hold you entirely responsible,
Martin.
534
00:24:44,160 --> 00:24:45,896
You did it in the spirit
of fairness.
535
00:24:45,920 --> 00:24:47,320
No, I did it...
536
00:24:48,920 --> 00:24:50,120
I did it for love.
537
00:24:52,840 --> 00:24:54,176
Has Calvin been around?
538
00:24:54,200 --> 00:24:56,616
No. I believe his agent
whisked him away.
539
00:24:56,640 --> 00:24:58,216
He'll be wanting to get his
side of the story
540
00:24:58,240 --> 00:25:00,776
in the Sunday papers
before all the rumours start.
541
00:25:00,800 --> 00:25:02,080
Yeah, of course...
542
00:25:03,240 --> 00:25:04,280
He's a good lad.
543
00:25:07,640 --> 00:25:11,056
If there's any way of keeping
my name out of it,
I'd appreciate it, boss.
544
00:25:11,080 --> 00:25:12,496
Yeah, of course.
545
00:25:12,520 --> 00:25:14,480
Well, I'll do what I can.
546
00:25:16,160 --> 00:25:17,400
Thanks.
547
00:25:19,800 --> 00:25:21,696
Hey, er, give my love
to the San Siro.
548
00:25:21,720 --> 00:25:22,976
Heh!
549
00:25:23,000 --> 00:25:25,576
In bocca al lupo.
550
00:25:25,600 --> 00:25:26,920
Good luck.
551
00:26:01,160 --> 00:26:02,600
Come in.
552
00:26:04,960 --> 00:26:06,080
Hi.
553
00:26:07,880 --> 00:26:10,016
I just want to apologise
about earlier, you know.
554
00:26:10,040 --> 00:26:12,496
Things were said
in the heat of the moment.
555
00:26:12,520 --> 00:26:15,216
There's no hard feelings,
Mitch? I understand.
556
00:26:15,240 --> 00:26:17,616
Get carried away, we do,
don't we?
557
00:26:17,640 --> 00:26:20,416
About 22 blokes chasing a
pig's bladder around a field.
558
00:26:20,440 --> 00:26:23,496
Well, the game's nothing without
passion and we should never
apologise for that.
559
00:26:23,520 --> 00:26:24,536
Thanks. Er...
560
00:26:24,560 --> 00:26:26,776
Anyway, look,
I just wanted to let you know
561
00:26:26,800 --> 00:26:29,376
that the place is crawling
with press out there
562
00:26:29,400 --> 00:26:31,216
and they all want to talk
to you.
563
00:26:31,240 --> 00:26:33,856
They're saying all sorts of
nonsense about you and young Calvin.
564
00:26:33,880 --> 00:26:35,496
I don't believe a word of it,
mind you, now,
565
00:26:35,520 --> 00:26:38,096
but when you leave, you know, you
ought to use the back entrance.
566
00:26:38,120 --> 00:26:39,816
Exit.
567
00:26:39,840 --> 00:26:41,336
That's the one. Not the...
568
00:26:41,360 --> 00:26:42,736
All right.
569
00:26:42,760 --> 00:26:44,176
Er, hey!
570
00:26:44,200 --> 00:26:45,896
You're a City fan, aren't you?
571
00:26:45,920 --> 00:26:48,976
Er, yeah, yeah, for my sins.
572
00:26:49,000 --> 00:26:51,776
Well, if it's any consolation,
you had a good win today,
you know, Preston.
573
00:26:51,800 --> 00:26:54,936
3-1.
Well. Every cloud?
574
00:26:54,960 --> 00:26:56,776
They've also said
they're gonna dock us points,
575
00:26:56,800 --> 00:26:59,096
by the look of things,
because of all the fracas.
576
00:26:59,120 --> 00:27:01,096
You think so?
Well, you saw it out there.
577
00:27:01,120 --> 00:27:02,616
I mean, it was brutal.
578
00:27:02,640 --> 00:27:04,856
They're already calling it
"The War of Wallis Park".
579
00:27:04,880 --> 00:27:08,176
Gary Lineker, he's been on
Twitter saying that it
would be morally wrong
580
00:27:08,200 --> 00:27:09,696
if we were promoted.
581
00:27:09,720 --> 00:27:11,456
Yeah, but he's into refugees
and all that malarkey.
582
00:27:11,480 --> 00:27:12,736
So he shouldn't be listened
to, really.
583
00:27:12,760 --> 00:27:14,096
He's an interfering do-gooder.
584
00:27:14,120 --> 00:27:16,776
Yeah. Never professionally
booked, though? That
takes some restraint.
585
00:27:16,800 --> 00:27:18,536
You know what that means, though,
don't you? We get docked
586
00:27:18,560 --> 00:27:20,616
and we're gonna go down
to third place.
587
00:27:20,640 --> 00:27:22,136
And that means you lot, City,
588
00:27:22,160 --> 00:27:24,416
you're gonna get promoted
instead of us, you know?
589
00:27:24,440 --> 00:27:26,376
£150 million quid right up
the shitter!
590
00:27:26,400 --> 00:27:27,776
No offence.
591
00:27:27,800 --> 00:27:29,336
Well, that would be something.
592
00:27:29,360 --> 00:27:34,176
Anyway, you know, I just
wanted to say it's been
a real pleasure
593
00:27:34,200 --> 00:27:35,696
to work with you over the years,
594
00:27:35,720 --> 00:27:37,496
and it's a shame it had to end like
this, really, isn't it, you know?
595
00:27:37,520 --> 00:27:39,176
Football?
596
00:27:39,200 --> 00:27:40,656
Bloody hell.
597
00:27:40,680 --> 00:27:41,856
Mitch, can I ask you a question?
598
00:27:41,880 --> 00:27:43,720
Yeah. Yeah.
599
00:27:45,000 --> 00:27:46,776
What creature are you?
600
00:27:46,800 --> 00:27:48,136
What, this?
601
00:27:48,160 --> 00:27:49,880
Absolutely no idea.
602
00:27:52,280 --> 00:27:55,160
I know I look a right See You
Next Tuesday in it, but, er...
603
00:27:56,880 --> 00:27:58,640
you do anything for your
club, don't you?
604
00:28:01,520 --> 00:28:03,840
I suppose you do, yeah.
47381
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