All language subtitles for Friends S01E15 EN

af Afrikaans
ak Akan
sq Albanian
am Amharic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bem Bemba
bn Bengali
bh Bihari
bs Bosnian
br Breton
bg Bulgarian
km Cambodian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
chr Cherokee
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
ee Ewe
fo Faroese
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gaa Ga
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gn Guarani
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ia Interlingua
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
rw Kinyarwanda
rn Kirundi
kg Kongo
ko Korean
kri Krio (Sierra Leone)
ku Kurdish
ckb Kurdish (Soranรฎ)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Laothian
la Latin
lv Latvian
ln Lingala
lt Lithuanian
loz Lozi
lg Luganda
ach Luo
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mfe Mauritian Creole
mo Moldavian
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
sr-ME Montenegrin
ne Nepali
pcm Nigerian Pidgin
nso Northern Sotho
nn Norwegian (Nynorsk)
oc Occitan
or Oriya
om Oromo
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt-BR Portuguese (Brazil) Download
pt Portuguese (Portugal)
pa Punjabi
qu Quechua
ro Romanian
rm Romansh
nyn Runyakitara
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
sh Serbo-Croatian
st Sesotho
tn Setswana
crs Seychellois Creole
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhalese
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish
es-419 Spanish (Latin American)
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
tt Tatar
te Telugu
th Thai
ti Tigrinya
to Tonga
lua Tshiluba
tum Tumbuka
tr Turkish
tk Turkmen
tw Twi
ug Uighur
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
wo Wolof
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,267 --> 00:00:01,211 Friends S01E15 The One With The Stoned Guy (Celui qui pรจte les plombs) (VO&VF+STFR&EN) 2 00:00:03,795 --> 00:00:05,004 Coffee. 3 00:00:05,171 --> 00:00:07,423 - Thank you. - Cappuccino. 4 00:00:08,925 --> 00:00:11,677 And a nice hot cider for Monica. 5 00:00:11,845 --> 00:00:13,679 Aw, thank you. 6 00:00:14,014 --> 00:00:15,180 - Rach? - Yeah? 7 00:00:15,348 --> 00:00:17,975 Why does my cinnamon stick have an eraser? 8 00:00:19,269 --> 00:00:20,436 Oh. 9 00:00:20,603 --> 00:00:21,937 Oh, heh. 10 00:00:22,105 --> 00:00:23,814 That's why. 11 00:00:24,566 --> 00:00:25,983 Sorry. 12 00:01:24,834 --> 00:01:26,752 Chandler? 13 00:01:27,253 --> 00:01:29,630 Miss Tedlock, you're looking lovely today. 14 00:01:29,798 --> 00:01:33,383 May I say that is a very flattering sleeve length on you? 15 00:01:34,177 --> 00:01:35,219 Yes. 16 00:01:35,386 --> 00:01:39,556 Well, Mr. Costilick would like you to stop by his office at the end of the day. 17 00:01:40,266 --> 00:01:43,727 Oh, listen, if this is about those prank memos, I had nothing to do with them. 18 00:01:43,895 --> 00:01:46,230 Really, nothing at all. Really. 19 00:01:46,564 --> 00:01:47,606 Nothing. 20 00:01:51,444 --> 00:01:52,945 Hey, you guys. You guys. 21 00:01:53,113 --> 00:01:55,948 Chandler's coming, and he says he has this incredible news. 22 00:01:56,116 --> 00:01:58,534 So when he gets here, let's all act like, you know... 23 00:01:58,701 --> 00:02:00,244 - Hey. Hey. 24 00:02:00,411 --> 00:02:03,038 Never mind. But it was gonna be really good. 25 00:02:04,040 --> 00:02:05,791 What's going on? What's up? 26 00:02:05,959 --> 00:02:08,460 It's a typical day at work. I'm inputting my numbers... 27 00:02:08,628 --> 00:02:10,462 ...and Big Al calls me into his office... 28 00:02:10,630 --> 00:02:13,632 ...and tells me he wants to make me processing supervisor. 29 00:02:13,800 --> 00:02:15,968 - That is great! - Congratulations. 30 00:02:16,136 --> 00:02:18,387 So I quit. 31 00:02:18,847 --> 00:02:20,222 Why? 32 00:02:20,390 --> 00:02:22,641 Why? This was supposed to be a temp job. 33 00:02:22,809 --> 00:02:25,727 Yeah, Chandler, you've been there for five years. 34 00:02:25,895 --> 00:02:27,312 I know, but if I took it this... 35 00:02:27,480 --> 00:02:30,149 ...it'd be like admitting that this is what I actually do. 36 00:02:30,316 --> 00:02:31,608 So was it a lot more money? 37 00:02:31,776 --> 00:02:34,403 Doesn't matter. I just don't want to be one of those guys... 38 00:02:34,571 --> 00:02:38,157 ...that's in his office until 12:00 at night worrying about the WENUS. 39 00:02:41,327 --> 00:02:42,619 "The WENUS"? 40 00:02:42,954 --> 00:02:46,665 Weekly estimated net usage system. It's a processing term. 41 00:02:47,375 --> 00:02:49,668 Oh, that WENUS. 42 00:02:50,837 --> 00:02:52,045 So, what are you gonna do? 43 00:02:52,213 --> 00:02:54,423 I don't know. That's the thing. I don't know. 44 00:02:54,591 --> 00:02:56,675 I'm not gonna figure it out working there. 45 00:02:56,843 --> 00:02:59,094 Oh! I have something you can do. 46 00:02:59,262 --> 00:03:01,513 I have this new massage client. Steve. 47 00:03:03,224 --> 00:03:06,018 Anyway, um, he's opening up a restaurant... 48 00:03:06,186 --> 00:03:09,021 ...and he's looking for a head chef. 49 00:03:10,523 --> 00:03:12,983 Um, hi there. 50 00:03:13,193 --> 00:03:14,318 Hi. 51 00:03:14,485 --> 00:03:17,654 Oh, yeah, I know. You're a chef, I know, and I thought of you first. 52 00:03:17,822 --> 00:03:21,200 But, um, Chandler's the one who needs a job right now, so... 53 00:03:23,286 --> 00:03:26,163 Yeah, I just don't have a lot of chefing experience. 54 00:03:26,497 --> 00:03:28,373 Unless it's an all-toast restaurant. 55 00:03:29,459 --> 00:03:32,461 - Yeah. Yeah. - Well, what kind of food is he looking for? 56 00:03:32,629 --> 00:03:35,631 He wants to do something eclectic, so he's looking for someone... 57 00:03:35,798 --> 00:03:37,799 ...who can, you know, create the entire menu. 58 00:03:37,967 --> 00:03:39,885 - Oh, my God. - Yeah, I know. 59 00:03:40,053 --> 00:03:41,678 So, what do you think? 60 00:03:43,306 --> 00:03:46,558 Thanks, Pheeb. I just don't really see myself in a big white hat. 61 00:03:46,726 --> 00:03:47,851 Okay. 62 00:03:49,771 --> 00:03:51,313 Oh, Monica. Guess what? 63 00:04:01,741 --> 00:04:03,909 Can you see my nipples through this shirt? 64 00:04:06,663 --> 00:04:09,748 No, but don't worry. I'm sure they're still there. 65 00:04:11,209 --> 00:04:12,709 Where you going, Mr. Suit-ey Man? 66 00:04:12,877 --> 00:04:15,879 Well, I have an appointment to see Dr. Robert Pilman... 67 00:04:16,047 --> 00:04:17,673 ...career counselor-a-go-go. 68 00:04:19,550 --> 00:04:21,218 I added the "a-go-go." 69 00:04:21,386 --> 00:04:22,761 Career counselor? 70 00:04:22,929 --> 00:04:25,931 Hey, you guys all know what you want to do. 71 00:04:26,099 --> 00:04:27,808 I don't. 72 00:04:27,976 --> 00:04:31,728 Hey, you guys in the living room all know what you want to do. 73 00:04:31,896 --> 00:04:34,147 You know, you have goals. You have dreams. 74 00:04:34,524 --> 00:04:35,649 I don't have a dream. 75 00:04:35,817 --> 00:04:39,236 Ah, the lesser known "I Don't Have a Dream" speech. 76 00:04:40,989 --> 00:04:43,699 Oh, I love my life. I love my life. 77 00:04:43,866 --> 00:04:45,701 Brian's Song. 78 00:04:48,246 --> 00:04:49,830 The meeting with that guy went great? 79 00:04:49,998 --> 00:04:52,874 So great. He showed me where the restaurant's gonna be. 80 00:04:53,042 --> 00:04:55,127 It's this cute little place on 10th Street. 81 00:04:55,295 --> 00:04:58,130 It's not too big, not too small. It's just right. 82 00:04:58,298 --> 00:05:01,383 Was it formerly owned by a blond woman and some bears? 83 00:05:02,427 --> 00:05:06,013 So anyway, I'm cooking dinner for him Monday night. Kind of like an audition. 84 00:05:06,180 --> 00:05:09,266 And Phoebe, he really wants you to be here, which will be great for me. 85 00:05:09,434 --> 00:05:10,809 Because you can make yummy noises. 86 00:05:11,019 --> 00:05:13,270 - What are you gonna make? - Yummy noises. 87 00:05:15,440 --> 00:05:17,607 And, Monica, what are you gonna make? 88 00:05:17,775 --> 00:05:20,319 I don't know. I don't know. It's just gotta be so great. 89 00:05:20,486 --> 00:05:22,779 Oh! I know what you can make. I know. 90 00:05:22,947 --> 00:05:25,824 Oh, you should make that thing, you know, with the stuff. 91 00:05:27,535 --> 00:05:31,455 You know that thing with the stuff? 92 00:05:32,540 --> 00:05:34,166 Okay, I don't know. 93 00:05:35,710 --> 00:05:38,170 Hey, guys, anyone know a good date place in the neighborhood? 94 00:05:38,338 --> 00:05:43,342 Uh, how about Tony's? If you can finish a 32-ounce steak, it's free. 95 00:05:45,636 --> 00:05:46,928 Okay. Ahem. 96 00:05:47,096 --> 00:05:50,223 Hey, does anyone know a good place if you're not dating a puma? 97 00:05:51,851 --> 00:05:54,811 - Who are you going out with? - Oh, is this the bug lady? 98 00:05:54,979 --> 00:05:57,606 I love you, Ross. 99 00:05:59,609 --> 00:06:01,526 Her name is Celia. She's not a bug lady. 100 00:06:01,694 --> 00:06:04,112 She's curator of insects at the museum. 101 00:06:05,656 --> 00:06:07,282 So, what are you guys gonna do? 102 00:06:07,450 --> 00:06:10,619 Well, I just thought we'd go to dinner, then bring her back to my place... 103 00:06:10,787 --> 00:06:13,330 ...and I'd introduce her to my monkey. 104 00:06:15,875 --> 00:06:17,834 And he's not speaking metaphorically. 105 00:06:20,880 --> 00:06:23,340 - So back to your place? - Uh-huh. 106 00:06:23,508 --> 00:06:25,509 You thinking maybe, heh-heh? 107 00:06:26,761 --> 00:06:30,180 Ahem, well, I don't know, heh-heh. 108 00:06:30,848 --> 00:06:32,766 I'm hoping heh-heh. 109 00:06:33,893 --> 00:06:36,144 I'm telling you, that monkey's a chick magnet. 110 00:06:36,312 --> 00:06:40,857 She's gonna one look at his furry, cute little face and it'll seal the deal. 111 00:06:43,027 --> 00:06:44,236 - Aah! Celia, don't worry. 112 00:06:44,404 --> 00:06:47,864 Celia, he's not gonna hurt you. Soothing tones, Celia, soothing tones. 113 00:06:48,032 --> 00:06:49,825 - Okay, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. - Aah! 114 00:06:50,034 --> 00:06:53,870 - Here, here. Marcel? Marcel? - I can't stand this. 115 00:06:54,038 --> 00:06:57,374 - He's got his claws on my... - Yeah, all right. 116 00:07:05,049 --> 00:07:07,884 Okay, try this salmon mousse. 117 00:07:08,845 --> 00:07:10,762 - Mm. Good. Yeah? 118 00:07:10,930 --> 00:07:13,390 Is it better than the other salmon mousse? 119 00:07:14,142 --> 00:07:15,684 It's creamier. 120 00:07:15,852 --> 00:07:18,019 Yeah? Well, is that better? 121 00:07:18,187 --> 00:07:21,606 I don't know. We're talking about whipped fish, Monica. 122 00:07:22,483 --> 00:07:24,818 I'm just happy I'm keeping it down, you know? 123 00:07:30,950 --> 00:07:32,617 God, what happened to you? 124 00:07:32,785 --> 00:07:35,704 Eight and a half hours of aptitude tests... 125 00:07:35,872 --> 00:07:40,333 ...intelligence tests, personality tests, and what do I learn? 126 00:07:40,918 --> 00:07:43,170 "You're ideally suited for a career in data processing... 127 00:07:43,337 --> 00:07:45,714 ...for a large multi-national corporation." 128 00:07:46,966 --> 00:07:50,385 That's so great, because you already know how to do that. 129 00:07:50,970 --> 00:07:52,804 Can you believe it? 130 00:07:52,972 --> 00:07:56,475 Don't I seem like somebody who should be doing something really cool? 131 00:07:56,642 --> 00:08:00,479 You know, I just always pictured myself doing something... 132 00:08:00,855 --> 00:08:02,147 Something. 133 00:08:02,315 --> 00:08:05,400 Oh, Chandler, I know, I know. 134 00:08:05,943 --> 00:08:09,154 Oh, hey, you can see your nipples through this shirt. 135 00:08:13,367 --> 00:08:15,577 Here you go. Maybe this will cheer you up. 136 00:08:16,496 --> 00:08:19,247 Ooh, you know, um, I had a grape about five hours ago... 137 00:08:19,415 --> 00:08:20,832 ...so I better split this with you. 138 00:08:22,168 --> 00:08:24,920 It's supposed to be that small. It's a pre-appetizer. 139 00:08:25,087 --> 00:08:28,173 The French call it an amuse-bouche. 140 00:08:31,427 --> 00:08:33,762 Well, it is amusing. 141 00:08:40,353 --> 00:08:43,188 Hello? Oh, hi, Wendy. 142 00:08:43,356 --> 00:08:45,190 Yeah, 8:00. 143 00:08:45,691 --> 00:08:47,192 What did we say? Ten dollars an hour? 144 00:08:48,611 --> 00:08:49,861 Okay, great. 145 00:08:50,029 --> 00:08:52,155 All right, I'll see you then. Bye. 146 00:08:52,323 --> 00:08:53,907 Ten dollars an hour for what? 147 00:08:54,075 --> 00:08:56,618 I asked a waitress at work to help me out. 148 00:08:57,161 --> 00:08:58,662 Waitressing? 149 00:08:58,871 --> 00:09:00,288 Uh-oh. 150 00:09:01,249 --> 00:09:04,751 Ha, ha. Of course I thought of you. 151 00:09:04,919 --> 00:09:06,336 But... 152 00:09:06,504 --> 00:09:08,505 - But... - But, but? 153 00:09:10,299 --> 00:09:14,970 But, you see, it's just this night has to go just perfect, you know... 154 00:09:15,137 --> 00:09:19,349 ...and, well, Wendy's more of a professional waitress. 155 00:09:19,892 --> 00:09:21,351 Oh. 156 00:09:21,769 --> 00:09:24,396 I see. Yes. And I've sort of been maintaining my amateur status... 157 00:09:24,564 --> 00:09:26,565 ...so that I can waitress in the Olympics. 158 00:09:30,403 --> 00:09:34,823 You know, I don't mean to brag, but I waited tables at Innsbruck in '76. 159 00:09:39,036 --> 00:09:40,870 Amuse-bouche? 160 00:09:58,055 --> 00:09:59,556 Talk to me. 161 00:10:01,767 --> 00:10:05,687 Okay, uh, ahem, a weird thing happened to me on the train this morning... 162 00:10:05,855 --> 00:10:09,608 No, no, no. Talk dirty. 163 00:10:13,029 --> 00:10:16,239 - Wow. Here? - Come on. 164 00:10:16,407 --> 00:10:17,866 Come on. 165 00:10:18,034 --> 00:10:19,701 Say something... 166 00:10:19,869 --> 00:10:21,286 ...hot. 167 00:10:22,830 --> 00:10:24,581 - What? - Uh... 168 00:10:24,749 --> 00:10:27,083 - What? - Ooh. 169 00:10:27,251 --> 00:10:29,669 - What? - Um... 170 00:10:29,837 --> 00:10:31,129 What? 171 00:10:31,297 --> 00:10:33,131 - What? - Vulva. 172 00:10:40,181 --> 00:10:41,389 "Vulva"? 173 00:10:43,517 --> 00:10:45,810 All right, I panicked, all right? 174 00:10:45,978 --> 00:10:47,729 She took me by surprise. 175 00:10:47,897 --> 00:10:51,858 You know, but it wasn't a total loss. I mean, uh, we ended up cuddling. 176 00:10:52,026 --> 00:10:54,903 Whoa, you cuddled? How many times? 177 00:10:56,364 --> 00:10:58,531 Shut up. It was nice. I just... 178 00:10:58,699 --> 00:11:01,785 I just don't think I'm the dirty-talking kind of guy, you know? 179 00:11:01,952 --> 00:11:04,537 What's the big deal? Just say what you want to do to her. 180 00:11:04,705 --> 00:11:06,748 Or what you want her to do to you. 181 00:11:06,916 --> 00:11:09,959 Or what you think other people might be doing to each other. 182 00:11:10,503 --> 00:11:13,755 Look, I tell you what. Try something on me. 183 00:11:16,258 --> 00:11:17,884 Please be kidding. 184 00:11:20,429 --> 00:11:21,763 Why not? Come on. 185 00:11:21,931 --> 00:11:25,642 Just close your eyes and tell me what you'd like to be doing right now. 186 00:11:30,898 --> 00:11:32,774 Okay, I'm, uh... 187 00:11:33,150 --> 00:11:35,443 I'm in my apartment... 188 00:11:35,945 --> 00:11:36,945 Yeah, what else? 189 00:11:37,113 --> 00:11:39,906 That's it. You're not there. We're not having this conversation. 190 00:11:40,408 --> 00:11:42,492 - All right. Look, I'll start, okay? - Joey, please. 191 00:11:42,660 --> 00:11:45,078 Come on, come on. All right, ready? Look. 192 00:11:45,454 --> 00:11:47,205 Oh, Ross. 193 00:11:49,083 --> 00:11:53,253 You get me so hot, I want your lips on me now. 194 00:11:54,004 --> 00:11:55,422 See? 195 00:11:58,467 --> 00:12:01,720 - All right, now you say something. - I, uh... I really don't think so. 196 00:12:01,887 --> 00:12:03,263 Come on. 197 00:12:03,431 --> 00:12:04,889 - You like this woman, right? - Yeah. 198 00:12:05,057 --> 00:12:06,599 - You wanna see her again, right? - Sure. 199 00:12:06,767 --> 00:12:09,894 Well, if you can't talk dirty to me, how are you gonna talk dirty to her? 200 00:12:10,062 --> 00:12:12,439 Now tell me you want to caress my butt. 201 00:12:17,570 --> 00:12:19,571 Okay, turn around. 202 00:12:20,489 --> 00:12:22,907 I just don't want you staring at me when I'm doing this. 203 00:12:23,075 --> 00:12:25,869 All right, all right. I'm not looking. Go ahead. 204 00:12:26,036 --> 00:12:27,370 Okay. 205 00:12:29,457 --> 00:12:31,624 Ahem, I want, um... 206 00:12:31,792 --> 00:12:33,918 Okay, I want... 207 00:12:34,086 --> 00:12:35,336 ...to feel... 208 00:12:35,504 --> 00:12:38,548 ...your hot, soft skin with my lips. 209 00:12:38,716 --> 00:12:40,717 There you go. 210 00:12:41,343 --> 00:12:43,344 Keep going, keep going. 211 00:12:43,846 --> 00:12:45,346 I, uh... 212 00:12:48,017 --> 00:12:50,727 I want to take my tongue and... 213 00:12:58,444 --> 00:12:59,903 And... 214 00:13:00,070 --> 00:13:01,696 Say it. 215 00:13:04,658 --> 00:13:06,284 Say it! 216 00:13:07,077 --> 00:13:09,496 Run it all over your body... 217 00:13:12,166 --> 00:13:14,250 ...until you're trembling with... 218 00:13:33,687 --> 00:13:35,396 With? 219 00:13:37,441 --> 00:13:39,567 - Funny story. - You're not gonna believe this. 220 00:13:39,735 --> 00:13:41,152 It's okay. It's okay. 221 00:13:41,320 --> 00:13:44,697 I was always rooting for you two kids to get together. 222 00:13:46,575 --> 00:13:49,577 Hey, while you were sleeping, that guy from your old job called again. 223 00:13:49,745 --> 00:13:50,787 Oh. Again? 224 00:13:50,955 --> 00:13:53,540 - And again and again and again. - And again. 225 00:13:57,962 --> 00:14:00,046 Hello? Heh. And again. 226 00:14:00,214 --> 00:14:01,297 Ah. 227 00:14:01,465 --> 00:14:05,218 Hey, Mr. Costilick. How's life on the 15th floor? 228 00:14:06,345 --> 00:14:08,096 Yeah, I miss you too. 229 00:14:08,264 --> 00:14:12,392 Yeah, it's a lot less satisfying to steal pens from your own home, you know? 230 00:14:14,311 --> 00:14:15,562 Well, that's very generous. 231 00:14:16,021 --> 00:14:18,189 Uh, but look, this isn't about the money. 232 00:14:18,357 --> 00:14:20,400 You know? I need something that's more than a job. 233 00:14:20,568 --> 00:14:23,111 I need something I really care about... 234 00:14:23,279 --> 00:14:26,489 And that's on top of the year-end bonus structure you mentioned earlier? 235 00:14:26,657 --> 00:14:27,991 Your dream. 236 00:14:28,158 --> 00:14:31,452 Look, Al. Al, I'm not playing hardball here, okay? 237 00:14:31,620 --> 00:14:34,831 This is not a negotiation. This is a rejection. 238 00:14:34,999 --> 00:14:36,833 No... No, no. No, no. 239 00:14:37,001 --> 00:14:38,585 No, stop saying numbers! 240 00:14:38,752 --> 00:14:42,297 I'm telling you, you've got the wrong guy! You got the wrong guy! 241 00:14:42,464 --> 00:14:43,965 I'll see you Monday! 242 00:14:47,553 --> 00:14:48,970 Ah. 243 00:14:56,061 --> 00:14:57,604 Huh? 244 00:14:57,771 --> 00:15:00,106 Wow. It's huge. 245 00:15:00,274 --> 00:15:02,650 It's so much bigger than the cubicle. 246 00:15:02,818 --> 00:15:05,945 Oh, this is a cube. 247 00:15:06,113 --> 00:15:07,780 Look at this. 248 00:15:11,285 --> 00:15:13,661 You have a window! 249 00:15:14,496 --> 00:15:15,830 Yes, indeedy. 250 00:15:15,998 --> 00:15:20,335 - With a beautiful view of... - Oh, look. That guy's peeing. 251 00:15:21,712 --> 00:15:24,923 Okay. That's enough of the view. All right, check this out. 252 00:15:25,090 --> 00:15:27,675 - Ahem. Okay, sit down here. Sit down. - Okay. 253 00:15:27,843 --> 00:15:29,969 Okay, this is great. This is great. 254 00:15:30,137 --> 00:15:32,430 - Ahem. You ready? - Yeah. 255 00:15:33,140 --> 00:15:35,350 Helen, could you come in here for a moment? 256 00:15:40,898 --> 00:15:42,315 Thank you, Helen, that'll be all. 257 00:15:44,860 --> 00:15:46,819 Last time I do that. I promise. 258 00:15:52,368 --> 00:15:54,202 Wendy, we had a deal. 259 00:15:54,370 --> 00:15:56,496 Yeah, you promised. 260 00:15:56,664 --> 00:15:59,290 Wendy. Wendy. Wendy! 261 00:16:03,587 --> 00:16:05,213 Hmm, who was that? 262 00:16:07,049 --> 00:16:10,218 Wendy bailed. I have no waitress. 263 00:16:11,971 --> 00:16:13,638 That's too bad. 264 00:16:14,390 --> 00:16:15,974 Bye-bye. 265 00:16:16,976 --> 00:16:18,559 - Ten dollars an hour. - Nope. 266 00:16:18,936 --> 00:16:20,061 Twelve dollars an hour. 267 00:16:20,521 --> 00:16:23,856 Mon, I wish I could, but I've made plans to walk around. 268 00:16:25,192 --> 00:16:28,319 You know, Rachel, when you ran out on your wedding, I was there for you. 269 00:16:28,487 --> 00:16:32,407 I put a roof over your head, and if that means nothing to you... 270 00:16:33,200 --> 00:16:35,034 Twenty dollars an hour. 271 00:16:36,370 --> 00:16:37,662 Done. 272 00:16:44,294 --> 00:16:46,170 - Well, hello. Welcome to Monica's. - Hello. 273 00:16:46,338 --> 00:16:47,964 May I take your coat? 274 00:16:51,468 --> 00:16:53,469 - Hi, Steve. - Hello, Monica. 275 00:16:53,637 --> 00:16:56,014 Hello, greeter girl. 276 00:16:56,473 --> 00:16:59,100 - This is Rachel. - Yeah, okay. 277 00:16:59,810 --> 00:17:03,271 Mm, everything smells so delicious. 278 00:17:03,439 --> 00:17:07,775 You know, I can't remember a time I smelled such a delicious combination of... 279 00:17:07,943 --> 00:17:09,485 Okay, smells. 280 00:17:10,738 --> 00:17:12,280 Well, it's a lovely apartment. 281 00:17:12,448 --> 00:17:15,074 Oh, thank you. Would you like a tour? 282 00:17:15,242 --> 00:17:18,077 I was just being polite, but all right. 283 00:17:20,205 --> 00:17:22,331 What? What's up? 284 00:17:22,499 --> 00:17:26,711 In the cab on the way over, Steve blazed up a doobie. 285 00:17:28,088 --> 00:17:29,464 What? 286 00:17:29,631 --> 00:17:32,216 Smoked a joint, you know? Lit a bone. Weed, hemp, ganja. 287 00:17:32,384 --> 00:17:33,718 Okay, okay, okay. 288 00:17:35,345 --> 00:17:38,097 Okay, I'm with you, Cheech. Okay. 289 00:17:39,224 --> 00:17:41,517 Is it dry in here? 290 00:17:44,563 --> 00:17:46,814 Let me get you some wine. 291 00:17:46,982 --> 00:17:49,650 Yeah, I think we're ready for our first course too. 292 00:17:50,194 --> 00:17:51,652 Okay... 293 00:17:52,654 --> 00:17:55,031 These are rock shrimp ravioli... 294 00:17:55,199 --> 00:17:57,366 ...in a cilantro ponzu sauce... - Oh. 295 00:17:57,534 --> 00:17:59,911 ...with just a touch of minced... 296 00:18:05,209 --> 00:18:06,417 ...ginger. 297 00:18:07,252 --> 00:18:09,670 Well, smack my ass and call me Judy. 298 00:18:13,509 --> 00:18:15,009 These are fantastic. 299 00:18:15,177 --> 00:18:17,804 Oh, gosh. I'm so glad you liked them. 300 00:18:17,971 --> 00:18:20,264 Like them? I could eat a hundred of them. 301 00:18:21,350 --> 00:18:23,392 Oh. Well, um... 302 00:18:23,560 --> 00:18:25,686 That's all there is of these... 303 00:18:25,854 --> 00:18:29,273 ...but in about eight and a half minutes, we'll be serving some delicious tartlets. 304 00:18:29,817 --> 00:18:31,442 "Tartlets"? Heh. 305 00:18:31,610 --> 00:18:35,905 "Tartlets." 306 00:18:37,741 --> 00:18:39,784 Word has lost all meaning. 307 00:18:46,083 --> 00:18:49,085 Excuse me. Can I help you with anything? 308 00:18:49,253 --> 00:18:51,671 You know, I don't know what I'm looking for. 309 00:19:08,063 --> 00:19:09,730 Oh, cool. Taco shells. 310 00:19:12,442 --> 00:19:15,862 You know, these are... They are like a little corn envelope, you know? 311 00:19:16,029 --> 00:19:18,656 You know what? You don't want to spoil your appetite. 312 00:19:18,824 --> 00:19:21,159 Hey. Sugar-O's. 313 00:19:21,326 --> 00:19:24,120 You know, if you just wait another six and a half minutes... 314 00:19:24,288 --> 00:19:26,998 Oh. Macaroni and cheese. We gotta make this. 315 00:19:32,379 --> 00:19:33,963 No, we don't. 316 00:19:34,673 --> 00:19:36,257 Oh, okay. 317 00:19:36,508 --> 00:19:38,593 Oh, sorry. 318 00:19:42,764 --> 00:19:45,057 Yeah, why don't you just have a seat here? 319 00:19:47,769 --> 00:19:49,228 Okay. 320 00:19:50,063 --> 00:19:52,106 Okay. Give me the Gummy Bears. 321 00:19:52,274 --> 00:19:54,567 Yeah, I... No. 322 00:19:56,737 --> 00:19:58,863 - Give them to me. - All right, we'll share. 323 00:19:59,031 --> 00:20:01,532 - No. Give me the bears. - Well, then you can't have any. 324 00:20:01,700 --> 00:20:03,409 - Give them to me. - This is not worth it. 325 00:20:03,577 --> 00:20:07,997 Oh, oh! Bears overboard. They're drowning. 326 00:20:08,749 --> 00:20:12,585 Hey, fellas. Grab onto a Sugar-O. Save yourselves. 327 00:20:12,753 --> 00:20:17,798 Help! Help! I'm drowning. Help! Help! 328 00:20:17,966 --> 00:20:19,592 That's it, okay? Dinner is over. 329 00:20:19,760 --> 00:20:20,927 - What? - "What"? 330 00:20:21,094 --> 00:20:22,511 - Why? "Why"? 331 00:20:22,679 --> 00:20:25,097 I've waited seven years for an opportunity like this... 332 00:20:25,265 --> 00:20:28,559 ...and you can't even wait four and a half minutes for a stupid onion tartlet? 333 00:20:30,103 --> 00:20:31,520 Hey... 334 00:20:39,321 --> 00:20:40,947 What a tool. 335 00:20:41,949 --> 00:20:44,325 You don't want to work for a guy like that. 336 00:20:44,493 --> 00:20:48,621 I know. It's just... I don't know, I just thought that this was, you know, "it." 337 00:20:48,789 --> 00:20:50,748 Look, you'll get there. You're an amazing chef. 338 00:20:50,916 --> 00:20:53,709 Yeah, you know all those yummy noises? I wasn't faking. 339 00:20:57,297 --> 00:20:58,547 [CLEARS THROAT] 340 00:21:02,052 --> 00:21:04,387 So, uh, how did it go with Celia? 341 00:21:04,554 --> 00:21:07,848 Oh, uh, I was unbelievable. 342 00:21:08,016 --> 00:21:09,976 All right, Ross. 343 00:21:10,143 --> 00:21:13,187 I was the James Michener of dirty talk. 344 00:21:13,355 --> 00:21:15,856 It was the most elaborate filth you have ever heard. 345 00:21:16,024 --> 00:21:19,527 I mean, there were characters, plot lines... 346 00:21:19,695 --> 00:21:21,320 ...themes, a motif. 347 00:21:21,488 --> 00:21:24,240 At one point, there were villagers. 348 00:21:25,993 --> 00:21:27,660 Oh, and, uh... 349 00:21:28,829 --> 00:21:32,123 Well, um, you know, by the time we finished with all the dirty talk... 350 00:21:32,291 --> 00:21:34,875 ...it was kind of late and we were both exhausted, so... 351 00:21:35,043 --> 00:21:37,670 - You cuddled. - Yeah, which was nice. 352 00:21:38,130 --> 00:21:40,840 Do you guys want to try to catch a late movie or something? 353 00:21:41,174 --> 00:21:43,134 Maybe, but shouldn't we wait for Chandler? 354 00:21:43,844 --> 00:21:45,678 Whoa. Where the hell is he? 355 00:21:46,138 --> 00:21:48,180 Yes, Fran, I know what time it is... 356 00:21:48,348 --> 00:21:51,475 ...but I'm looking at the WENUS and I'm not happy. 357 00:21:52,728 --> 00:21:54,854 Oh, really? Well, let me tell you something. 358 00:21:55,022 --> 00:21:59,608 You will care about it because I care about it. Got it? Good! 359 00:22:02,612 --> 00:22:04,113 Whoa. 360 00:22:15,250 --> 00:22:17,084 - How's this? - Eek! 361 00:22:17,252 --> 00:22:19,462 - Sorry. How about over here? - Oh! 362 00:22:19,629 --> 00:22:21,589 See, now, that just means it's working. 363 00:22:21,757 --> 00:22:23,924 - Does this hurt? - No. 364 00:22:24,092 --> 00:22:26,594 - How about this? - Aah! 365 00:22:26,762 --> 00:22:27,970 There you go. 366 00:22:35,354 --> 00:22:36,354 Oh, I'm gonna throw up. 27403

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.