Original subtitles

Johnny Mathis: ♪ I BET WE'VE BEEN TOGETHER ♪

♪ FOR A MILLION YEARS ♪

Deniece Williams: ♪ AND I BET WE'LL BE TOGETHER ♪

♪ FOR A MILLION MORE ♪

♪ OH, IT'S LIKE I STARTED BREATHING ♪

♪ ON THE NIGHT WE KISSED ♪

Both: ♪ AND I CAN'T REMEMBER ♪

♪ WHAT I EVER DID BEFORE ♪

♪ WHAT WOULD WE DO, BABY ♪

♪ WITHOUT US? ♪

♪ WHAT WOULD WE DO, BABY ♪

♪ WITHOUT US? ♪

♪ AND THERE AIN'T NO NOTHIN' ♪

♪ WE CAN'T LOVE EACH OTHER THROUGH ♪

♪ OOH HOO ♪

♪ WHAT WOULD WE DO, BABY ♪

♪ WITHOUT US? ♪

♪ SHA LA LA LA ♪

WHAT'S HEAVEN LIKE?

NO MATTER WHAT YOU EAT, YOU CAN'T GAIN WEIGHT.

Psychiatrist: ANSWER THE QUESTION, ALEX.

IS IT HARD TO BE YOU?

YOU KNOW THE ANSWER.

OF COURSE IT'S HARD.

THEY HAVE THESE GREAT STORES THERE, ALEX.

THEY OPEN AT 9:00 IN THE MORNING

AND STAY OPEN TILL INFINITY.

AND, ALEX...

ALEX, ONE SIZE FITS ALL.

WHY IS IT SO HARD TO BE YOU?

YOU KNOW.

SAY IT.

BECAUSE.

YEAH, BECAUSE...

BECAUSE I'M BETTER.

AND...

SMARTER.

I'LL BET ALEX KNOWS THE ANSWER.

DON'T DO THAT TO ME, MRS. LEAHY.

IT'S ALL SO SIMPLE, ALEX,

AND IT'S ALL SO PRETTY.

WHY DO YOU WORRY SO MUCH?

ALEX, TELL THE CLASS WHAT CHRISTOPHER COLUMBUS

WAS REALLY TRYING TO DO WHEN HE DISCOVERED AMERICA.

WHY DO YOU SET ME APART FROM THE OTHER KIDS LIKE THAT?

MAKES ME SO UNCOMFORTABLE.

THEY'RE ALL LOOKING AT ME.

THEY'RE ALL JEALOUS.

TH-THEY DON'T WANNA PLAY WITH ME AT RECESS.

IT'S THE PRICE YOU HAVE TO PAY, ALEX,

BECAUSE YOU'RE SPECIAL.

BUT I'M JUST A LITTLE BOY.

CLASS, PAY ATTENTION TO ALEX. I'M SURE...

GOD, I HATED IT WHEN SHE DID THAT!

I WISH YOU ALL COULD BE A LITTLE MORE LIKE ALEX.

SHE'D CALL ON ME IN THAT... THAT OLD-MAID TEACHER'S VOICE.

"ALEX KNOWS. ALEX KNOWS."

ALEX KNOWS.

I WAS 7 YEARS OLD!

YOU DON'T PUT THAT KIND OF PRESSURE ON A KID THAT AGE!

I KNEW I HAD TO BE READY,

BECAUSE SHE WAS COUNTING ON ME,

PUSHING ME.

ALEX, PLEASE TELL THE CLASS.

COLUMBUS WAS REALLY TRYING TO FIND

A FAST, DIRECT ROUTE TO THE INDIES, MRS. LEAHY.

UH, HE WAS LOOKING FOR SPICES,

BUT HE FOUND THE NEW WORLD.

IT WAS JUST AN ACCIDENT.

IT WAS AN ACCIDENT!

HE SHOULD NOT HAVE BEEN IN THAT CAR ALONE.

I... I SHOU... I SHOULD HAVE BEEN WITH HIM.

MA-MAYBE, I...

MAYBE HE WOULD HAVE GONE MORE SLOWLY.

MAYBE I WOULD HAVE SEEN THE OTHER CAR.

IT WAS AN ACCIDENT.

THERE AREN'T ANY ACCIDENTS, ALEX.

EVERYTHING HAPPENS THE WAY IT'S SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN.

WE'VE ALL BEEN HERE BEFORE.

MALLORY'S REALLY GETTING ON MY NERVES, DAD.

I MEAN, WHY... WHY DID YOU HAVE TO HAVE ANOTHER KID?

WE WERE DOIN' SO WELL, JUST THE THREE OF US.

WELL, WHEN YOU GET OLDER, YOU'LL APPRECIATE HER MORE.

DOUBT IT.

COME ON. YOU WANNA HAVE A LITTLE CATCH?

AW, NO. I DON'T WANNA, DAD.

I-I'M NOT VERY GOOD AT IT.

WELL, YOU CAN'T EXPECT TO LEARN IT ALL IN ONE DAY.

I LEARNED ALGEBRA ALL IN ONE DAY.

WELL, I KNOW.

BUT NOW YOU'RE STARTING SCHOOL,

YOU HAVE TO LEARN HOW TO PLAY CATCH, BASEBALL.

OK. OK. GOOD.

LOOK, I CAN GET US SOME TICKETS

TO THE INDIANS GAME ON SATURDAY IF YOU WANNA GO.

AH, THE INDIANS?

I DON'T LIKE THE INDIANS THAT MUCH.

WELL, HOW CAN YOU NOT LIKE THE INDIANS?

THEY'RE IN FIRST PLACE.

NOT FINANCIALLY.

IN TERMS OF CASH FLOW, THE ORIOLES ARE THE TEAM TO BEAT THIS YEAR.

THE ORIOLES ARE 15 GAMES OUT.

WELL, WHAT DOES THAT HAVE TO DO WITH ANYTHING?

THEIR TV REVENUES ARE UP 15%.

TICKET PRICES UP 7%.

THESE GUYS ARE DOIN' GREAT.

IF THEY KEEP THIS UP, THEY CAN BUY THE INDIANS.

THAT'S A WHOLE NEW PERSPECTIVE

ON OUR NATIONAL PASTIME.

WELL, COME ON. LET'S, UH...

LET'S HAVE A LITTLE CATCH, HUH?

REMEMBER HOW I SHOWED YOU?

NOW JUST, UH, PUT YOUR HANDS TOGETHER.

MAKE A CUP.

YEAH. GOOD BOY.

WHOOPS. I'M SORRY, DAD.

OH, NO.

NO, IT'S OK.

YOU'RE TRYING. THAT'S ALL THAT COUNTS.

HE WAS... HE WAS ALWAYS SUPPORTIVE LIKE THAT.

"JUST DO IT. JUST TRY.

"JUST HAVE FUN.

THAT'S ALL THAT MATTERS."

Psychiatrist: YOU HAVE TROUBLE WITH THAT ATTITUDE?

I DON'T KNOW.

I MEAN, IT'S... IT'S A LITTLE NAIVE, ISN'T IT?

I DON'T KNOW.

THERE ARE WINNERS, AND THERE ARE LOSERS IN LIFE,

AND THERE'S NO GETTING AROUND THAT.

SO YOU THINK YOUR FATHER'S A WEAK MAN, THEN?

NO.

BUT YOU JUST SAID...

JUST LET ME FINISH, OK? SORRY.

I USED TO THINK THAT WAY.

I'M EMBARRASSED BY IT NOW...

THAT I COULD BE SO BLIND TO HIS STRENGTH.

HE HAS GREAT LOVE, MY FATHER,

NOT... NOT JUST FOR HIS FAMILY, BUT FOR LIFE.

HE DOESN'T HAVE TO MAKE YOU WRONG FOR HIM TO BE RIGHT.

HE DOESN'T HAVE TO MAKE YOU A LOSER TO BE A WINNER HIMSELF.

I WISH I WAS MORE LIKE MY FATHER.

AW, DAD, ANOTHER SISTER!

H-HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME?

ALEX, SOME OF THESE THINGS ARE NOT CONTROLLABLE, YOU KNOW?

I KNOW, BUT YOU SHOULD HAVE CONSULTED WITH ME FIRST.

ALEX, SHE'S A BEAUTIFUL LITTLE GIRL,

AND WE LOVE HER.

YOU WILL, TOO.

ALL RIGHT.

WHAT'S THIS ONE'S NAME?

JENNIFER.

YOU GOT A MINUTE?

SURE.

WHAT ARE YOU READIN'?

KIERKEGAARD.

INTERNAL DEVELOPMENT OF MAN

AND DYNAMIC REPRESENTATIONAL EXPRESSION.

YEAH, WELL, THAT'S OK FOR FUN.

BUT LATER TRY TO GET IN SOMETHIN' A LITTLE MORE SERIOUS, OK?

I PROMISE.

DO YOU EVER THINK ABOUT IT, JEN?

LIFE?

DEATH?

INFINITY?

WELL, SOMETIMES I DO,

BUT... BUT SOMETIMES I JUST WANT TICKETS TO A VAN HALEN CONCERT.

INTERESTING KID, JEN.

SHE'S THE ONLY TEENAGER I KNOW

WHO CAN COMBINE SOREN KIERKEGAARD

AND EDDIE VAN HALEN IN HER LIFE.

IT'S FUNNY TO BE BACK HERE IN HER ROOM.

THERE'S... THERE'S A CERTAIN PERFUMEY SMELL.

UH, IT WAS HER BIRTHDAY.

SHE WAS 2.

AND I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO GET HER,

SO I GOT HER PERFUME,

BECAUSE I FIGURED, YOU KNOW, GIRLS LIKE THAT,

AND IT WAS ON SALE.

AND, UH, SHE SPILLED IT ALL OVER HER CRIB,

SO NOW, WHENEVER I SMELL VERY, VERY CHEAP PERFUME...

I THINK OF JEN.

THAT'S THE STRANGE THING ABOUT MEMORIES.

SOMETIMES THEY COULD BE MORE REAL

THAN WHAT WE THINK OF AS REALITY.

THE SMELL OF WET WOOL MITTENS ON A RADIATOR...

THAT IS THE SMELL OF MRS. LEAHY'S CLASS IN WINTER, FOREVER.

HEY, THOSE ARE MY MITTENS.

ARE YOU SURE? THEY LOOK A LITTLE BIT LIKE MINE.

YOUR MITTENS HAVE DOLLAR SIGNS

CROCHETED IN THE PALM?

SORRY. I DIDN'T NOTICE THAT.

HEY, YOU'RE THE NEW KID, AREN'T YOU?

YEAH, I'M GREG McCORMICK.

HELLO. MY NAME IS ALEX...

I KNOW WHO YOU ARE. YOU'RE ALEX KEATON,

THE KID WHO KNOWS EVERYTHING.

WHO TOLD YOU THAT? DID MRS. LEAHY SAY THAT?

NO, THE OTHER KIDS WERE SAYIN' IT.

THEY SAY IT'S GREAT HERE.

"ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS JUST KEEP QUIET.

SOONER OR LATER, KEATON RATTLES OFF THE ANSWER."

HOW COME YOU KNOW SO MUCH?

I TAKE SOME NIGHT CLASSES.

OHIO STATE.

WELL, I'LL SEE YOU AROUND.

I'M GONNA GO OUT AND PLAY FOR RECESS.

I'M SORRY ABOUT THE MITTENS.

HEY, DO YOU WANNA COME OUT AND PLAY?

ME?

YEAH, YOU. YOU KNOW HOW TO PLAY, DON'T YOU?

WELL, I... I NORMALLY STAY INSIDE AT RECESS

AND HELP MRS. LEAHY PREPARE TOMORROW'S ASSIGNMENTS.

COME ON. THERE'S A SNOWBALL FIGHT GOIN' ON.

YOU KNOW HOW TO MAKE A GOOD SNOWBALL?

NO.

SEE? YOU DON'T KNOW EVERYTHING.

LET'S GO!

DON'T KNOW EVERYTHING.

DON'T KNOW ANYTHING!

WHATEVER IT IS THAT I BASE MY LIFE UPON

IS... IS FALLING OUT FROM UNDERNEATH ME.

DO YOU BELIEVE IN GOD, ALEX?

I DON'T WANNA TALK ABOUT THAT, OK?

I'M SORRY. GO ON.

YOU KNOW WHAT'S BOTHERING ME?

I MEAN REALLY, REALLY BOTHERING ME?

S-SOMETHING THAT I'M HAVING A VERY DIFFICULT TIME GETTING PAST.

WHAT'S THAT?

I'M PAYING YOU FOR THIS!

I'M PAYING YOU TO SIT THERE AND LISTEN TO ME.

I'M PAYING A GUY FROM GRANT COLLEGE

TO SIT AND LISTEN TO MY LIFE STORY

AND GIVE ME ADVICE.

GRANT COLLEGE, A SCHOOL THAT GIVES A COURSE

IN OPENING UMBRELLAS.

I GOT AN "A" IN THAT.

ALL RIGHT, LOOK, TH-THIS IS POINTLESS.

I'M NOT GETTING ANY ANSWERS. I'M NOT GETTING ANY ADVICE.

I'M... I'M JUST SITTING HERE, DOIN' ALL THE TALKING,

A-AND YOU'RE JUST PULLING IT OUT OF ME.

HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT THAT?

HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT THAT?

I ASKED YOU FIRST.

YOU'RE REALLY GETTIN' ON MY NERVES.

WHAT IS IT YOU WANT, ALEX?

WHAT IS IT YOU'RE LOOKING FOR?

I JUST WANNA FEEL...

THE WAY I FELT WHEN I WAS A LITTLE BOY...

THAT... THAT FEELING OF SECURITY,

THAT FEELING OF SAFETY.

COMIN' HOME TO MY HOUSE ON A COLD, RAINY NIGHT,

I'D SEE THE LIGHT ON IN THE KITCHEN WINDOW,

AND I KNEW THERE WAS NO PLACE ELSE I WANTED TO BE.

THE COLDER I GOT AND THE WETTER I GOT,

THE MORE I ENJOYED IT,

BECAUSE I KNEW IN 2 MINUTES,

I WAS GONNA BE IN THAT KITCHEN,

SAFE AND WARM.

YOU KNOW HEMINGWAY'S STORY,

A CLEAN, WELL-LIGHTED PLACE?

I CAN'T SAY I'M FAMILIAR WITH THAT, NO.

THAT'S RIGHT. I FORGOT.

YOU WENT TO GRANT COLLEGE.

ALL RIGHT, OK, LET ME PUT IT IN TERMS

THAT YOU CAN UNDERSTAND, OK?

YOU REMEMBER WHEN BATMAN...

WANTED TO GET AWAY FROM IT ALL,

HE'D GO DOWN TO THE BATCAVE?

UH-HUH, YEAH!

THAT WAS THE FEELING WALKIN' INTO THAT KITCHEN.

I MEAN, WALKING IN THERE

WAS LIKE WALKIN' INTO A HUG.

I'LL TELL YOU A LITTLE SECRET.

SOMETIMES...

I'D FAKE A LITTLE COUGH,

A LITTLE SNEEZE, A LITTLE SNIFFLE,

JUST TO GET A LITTLE EXTRA ATTENTION.

HEY, WHO'D IT HURT?

AH-CHOO! AH-CHOO!

YOU ALL RIGHT, HONEY?

OH, I'M FINE, MOMMY.

I JUST GOT A LITTLE COLD.

YOU COME ON IN HERE.

I'VE GOT YOUR BLANKET READY FOR YOU.

AH, MOMMY, STOP. DON'T GO TO ALL THIS TROUBLE.

IT'S NO TROUBLE. YOU JUST SIT HERE.

I'M GONNA MAKE YOU SOME HOT CHOCOLATE.

YES!

HOT CHOCOLATE.

ONE MORE SNEEZE,

I GET WHIPPED CREAM.

AH-CHOO!

ALEX, ARE YOU JUST FAKING

BEING SICK AGAIN?

YOU'RE JUST JEALOUS, MAL,

BECAUSE YOU CAN'T PULL IT OFF.

SEE, I KNOW HOW TO DO THESE THINGS SELECTIVELY.

A LITTLE COUGH, A LITTLE SNIFFLE.

YOU COME IN AND SAY, "I'VE GOT MALARIA.

CAN I HAVE SOME HOT CHOCOLATE?"

THANK YOU, MOMMY.

I'M FEELING MUCH BETTER NOW.

WOULD YOU LIKE SOME COOKIES?

OH, MOMMY, YOU STOP IT, OK?

Y-YOU'RE SPOILING ME.

WHAT KIND?

I'M YOUR MOMMY. I CAN SPOIL YOU IF I LIKE.

CHOCOLATE CHIP?

BUTTERSCOTCH.

HAVE A GOOD DAY AT KINDERGARTEN TODAY?

IT WAS OK. WE MADE PICTURES.

ALEX, THIS IS BEAUTIFUL.

TH-THIS IS THE NICEST PICTURE YOU'VE EVER GIVEN ME.

THANK YOU, MOMMY.

I WAS THINKING ABOUT YOU

WHEN I BOUGHT IT.

YOU BOUGHT IT?

UH-HUH. ROGER ZIMMERMAN.

HE'S THE MOST TALENTED ARTIST IN OUR CLASS.

NOTHING'S TOO GOOD FOR MY MOMMY.

OH, MOMMY, MOMMY, MOMMY,

CAN WE SING THE SONG?

OH, YEAH, OK.

♪ WHERE IS THUMBKIN? ♪

♪ WHERE IS THUMBKIN? ♪

♪ HERE I AM ♪

♪ HERE I AM ♪

♪ HOW ARE YOU THIS MORNING? ♪

♪ VERY WELL, I THANK YOU ♪

♪ RUN AND HIDE ♪

♪ RUN AND HIDE ♪

♪ WHERE IS THUMBKIN... ♪

THAT WAS... THAT WAS THE SWEETEST-TASTING HOT CHOCOLATE

I EVER HAD IN MY LIFE.

I'M NEVER GONNA... NEVER GONNA FEEL THAT... THAT SAFE AGAIN,

THAT PROTECTED.

HEY, A-LEX.

HI, NICK.

WHAT ARE YOU DOIN' HERE?

WHAT DO YOU MEAN, WHAT AM I DOING HERE?

THESE ARE ALL THE PEOPLE IN YOUR LIFE, RIGHT?

I'M IN YOUR LIFE.

NICK, I'M PAYING THIS GUY BY THE HOUR.

OK?

I DON'T WANNA USE UP

ANY OF MY TIME TALKING TO YOU.

WHAT, YOU THINK YOU GOT NOTHIN' TO LEARN FROM ME, ALEX?

HUH? YOU DON'T THINK I AIN'T GOT NOTHIN' TO TEACH YOU?

NO, NICK. I DON'T THINK

YOU AIN'T GOT NOTHIN' TO TEACH ME.

ALEX, WHAT KIND OF GRAMMAR IS THAT?

SORRY, MRS. LEAHY.

JUST TRYIN' TO MAKE A POINT HERE.

COME ON. GO AWAY, WILL YOU, OK?

YOU'RE GETTIN' ME INTO TROUBLE.

HEY, HEY, HEY. YOU ARE JUST AFRAID OF THIS SIDE OF ME IN YOU.

THERE IS NO SIDE OF YOU IN ME, NICK.

SURE THERE IS.

Steppenwolf: ♪ BORN TO BE WILD ♪

♪ BORN TO BE WILD ♪

ALEX, CAN WE COME IN?!

JUST STUDYING, MOM.

FABULOUS REPORT CARD, ALEX.

AH, THANKS, DAD.

LISTEN TO WHAT YOUR TEACHER WROTE ON YOUR PAPER.

"ALEX KNOWS MORE ABOUT ECONOMICS

"THAN MOST PEOPLE IN AMERICA.

"I'M ASSUMING THIS PAPER DESERVES AN A.

I DON'T FULLY UNDERSTAND IT."

WE'RE VERY PROUD OF YOU, SON.

VERY PROUD, HONEY.

I DIDN'T KNOW YOU LIKED ROCK MUSIC, ALEX.

I DON'T LIKE ROCK MUSIC, MALLORY.

I HEARD YOU PLAYING ROCK MUSIC LAST NIGHT...

STEPPENWOLF AND JIM MORRISON AND THE DOORS.

GREG LIKES JIM MORRISON AND THE DOORS, NOT ME.

The Doors: ♪ THE TIME TO HESITATE IS THROUGH ♪

♪ NO TIME TO WALLOW IN THE MIRE ♪

♪ TRY NOW, WE CAN ONLY LOSE ♪

♪ AND OUR LOVE BECOME A FUNERAL PYRE ♪

♪ COME ON, BABY, LIGHT MY FIRE ♪

♪ COME ON, BABY, LIGHT MY FIRE ♪

♪ TRY TO SET THE NIGHT ON FIRE ♪

♪ YEAH ♪

AH, MAN, ALEX, I GOTTA GO.

I'LL SEE YOU IN SCHOOL TOMORROW.

OK, DON'T FORGET TO BRING MY HOMEWORK, OK?

DON'T I ALWAYS?

HEY, HEY, HEY, MY DAD SAID

HE MIGHT GET TICKETS FOR US FOR THE INDIANS GAME ON SUNDAY.

YOUR DAD IS THE GREATEST.

CAN HE GET A TICKET FOR MY BROTHER, TOO?

WAIT. DON'T GO.

HUH?

DON'T GO, OK?

DON'T WALK OUT THAT DOOR. DON'T GO.

I GOTTA GO. MY MOM MADE SUPPER.

NO. NO, DON'T LEAVE, OK? DON'T LEAVE.

JUST STAY HERE IN THIS ROOM WITH ME FOREVER.

ALEX, THIS IS SO SUDDEN.

JUST... JUST LISTEN TO ME, OK? OK?

'CAUSE I CAN'T BEAR TO SEE YOU GO.

ALEX, 2 14-YEAR-OLD GUYS

SHOULD BE ABLE TO SAY GOOD-BYE WITHOUT CRYING.

NO, YOU'RE NOT 14.

I'M NOT?

NO, WELL, YOU ARE NOW.

YOU ARE NOW,

BUT IN A... IN A BLINK,

YOU'RE GONNA BE 21 LIKE ME.

YOU'RE 21?

A-AND YOU'RE GONNA WALK OUT THE FRONT DOOR TO THIS HOUSE,

AND YOU'RE GONNA GET KILLED IN A CAR ACCIDENT.

ALEX, A SIMPLE "HAVE A NICE DAY" WILL DO.

DON'T GO, OK? DON'T GO.

DON'T GO. DON'T...

IT'S NOT FAIR!

IT'S NOT FAIR!

GREG SHOULD NOT BE DEAD.

HE NEVER HURT ANYBODY.

WHY?

WHY?

DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT, ALEX.

HEY.

I'M JUST A KID.

YOU'RE SPECIAL.

KEEP TRYING. PLAY FAIR.

WE'RE PROUD OF YOU, HONEY.

LIE DOWN. TAKE A NAP.

WHY ARE YOU CRYING, ALEX?

YOU GOT AN OWEE?

YEAH, YEAH, SORT OF.

WANT ME TO KISS IT AND MAKE IT BETTER?

I SURE DO.

BETTER?

MUCH.

COULD YOU COME HOME NOW?

UH, PRETTY SOON, OK? PRETTY SOON.

I... I JUST HAVE A FEW LOOSE ENDS TO TIE UP.

I'M GONNA GO HOME AND GET SOME HOT CHOCOLATE.

AH-CHOO!

THAT'S ME 17 YEARS AGO.

JUST MAKES ME THINK...

HOW MUCH I'VE BEEN THROUGH IN MY LIFE ALREADY

AND WHAT IT'S ALL MEANT.

I DON'T WANNA DIE.

I... I DON'T MEAN... I DON'T MEAN I DON'T WANNA DIE YOUNG.

I DON'T WANNA DIE MIDDLE-AGED.

I DON'T WANNA DIE OLD.

I DON'T WANNA DIE...

EVER.

DO YOU BELIEVE IN GOD, ALEX?

THAT'S WHAT THIS ALL COMES DOWN TO, RIGHT?

DOESN'T IT?

THAT'S WHAT I'M TRYIN' TO FIGURE OUT HERE.

BECAUSE... BECAUSE IF THERE IS A GOD,

THEN... THEN... THEN SOMEHOW THIS...

ALL MAKES SENSE.

I MEAN, THERE'S GOTTA BE A REASON,

SOME MASTER PLAN IN WHICH GREG'S...

DYING AND MY LIVING MAKE SENSE.

WHAT DO YOU THINK?

THE ANALYTICAL SIDE OF ME SAYS NO.

ON A STRAIGHT COST-EFFICIENCY BASIS,

YOU CAN'T PROVE IT.

THERE'S NO ANNUAL REPORT.

THERE'S NO PICTURES OF THE BOARD OF DIRECTORS.

I MEAN RECENT ONES.

AND... AND THERE'S A LOT OF THINGS

THAT JUST CANNOT BE ACCOUNTED FOR.

BUT THEN THERE ARE THESE MIRACULOUS THINGS.

PHENOMENA OF NATURE

LIKE, UH...

LIKE MOUNTAINS

AND OCEANS

AND SKIPPY GETTING DRESSED BY HIMSELF,

AND... AND YOU GOTTA THINK

THAT SOMEBODY'S HELPIN' OUT WITH THAT.

THE ANSWER IS YES.

I DO BELIEVE IN GOD...

BUT NOT A MEAN... NOT A MEAN ANGRY GOD,

LIKE... LIKE THE GODS YOU SEE ON TV

THAT ALWAYS... YOU KNOW THE PREACHERS

AND... AND ALWAYS ASKING YOU TO SEND THEM MONEY.

AND, UM...

AND NOT A GROOVY GOD

LIKE MALLORY'S GOD...

MATCHING SWEAT PANTS AND HEADBAND.

AND NOT A GOD LIKE BROTHER TIMOTHY'S GOD EITHER,

BECAUSE I JUST CAN'T BELIEVE THAT GOD MEANT ME

TO STAY AWAY FROM GIRLS.

IF HE DID, HE WOULDN'T HAVE MADE ME SO CUTE.

I THINK GOD IS GENTLE

AND... FORGIVING...

AND NOT ONE SPECIAL FORM, YOU KNOW?

I MEAN, ONE DAY, HE'S A DOLPHIN.

THE NEXT DAY, HE'S TRADING SHARES ON WALL STREET.

IT'D BE FUNNY

IF ONE DAY, HE GOT MIXED UP

AND WENT TO WALL STREET AS A DOLPHIN.

YOU SURPRISE ME, ALEX.

I DIDN'T THINK YOU REALLY WOULD BELIEVE,

A BOTTOM-LINE GUY LIKE YOURSELF.

YEAH. WELL, WELL, PART OF ME IS A LITTLE NERVOUS ABOUT IT.

I MEAN, I... I LIKE TO KNOW WHAT I KNOW,

SEE IT...

BE ABLE TO PROVE IT ON A... ON A TEST,

TO KNOW IT, TO LEARN IT, AND BE DONE,

AND I JUST GOT A FEELING...

THAT YOU KEEP GETTING TESTED ON THIS ONE.

SO WHAT DO YOU DO NOW?

WELL...

GREG'S DEAD...

AND I'M ALIVE...

AND I CAN'T CHANGE THAT.

BUT I CAN KEEP HIS MEMORY ALIVE.

I CAN TAKE...

HIS SENSE OF HUMOR...

AND HIS... AND HIS ENERGY...

AND HIS WARMTH...

AND I CAN MAKE IT MY OWN.

I CAN BE THE BEST ALEX KEATON THAT I CAN BE,

AND I CAN USE THE GIFTS THAT I'VE BEEN GIVEN,

AND I CAN TAKE THE TIME

TO APPRECIATE THE BEAUTY IN THIS LIFE...

AND I CAN...

I CAN BE GENTLE...

AND I CAN BE...

FORGIVING...

AND THOUGHTFUL...

AND I CAN MAKE A LOT OF MONEY...

BECAUSE, WELL, I-I'M SURE GOD WANTS ME TO.

BECAUSE IF HE DIDN'T,

HE WOULDN'T HAVE MADE ME SO SMART.

I... I WANNA... I WANNA TALK A LITTLE BIT MORE.

UH, DO WE STILL HAVE TIME?

YEAH, SURE. SIT DOWN.

ALL RIGHT. OK. I... I GOT SO MUCH IN MY HEAD NOW.

I DON'T KNOW WHERE TO START.

START FROM THE BEGINNING.

MY NAME IS ALEX KEATON.

SIT, UBU, SIT.

GOOD DOG.