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1
00:00:01,135 --> 00:00:03,080
Attention. I've been asked
to read this statement.
2
00:00:03,104 --> 00:00:06,107
"Two months ago,
Gina Linetti was hit by a bus,
3
00:00:06,140 --> 00:00:09,477
"and the brightest star
in the cosmos was extinguished.
4
00:00:09,510 --> 00:00:12,380
"But today,
like a phoenix from the ashes,
5
00:00:12,413 --> 00:00:15,516
she rises to vanquish"...
6
00:00:15,549 --> 00:00:17,118
This is ten pages.
7
00:00:17,151 --> 00:00:18,119
I can't read it.
8
00:00:18,152 --> 00:00:19,263
Gina's doctor said it was okay
9
00:00:19,287 --> 00:00:20,530
for her to come back
to work today.
10
00:00:20,554 --> 00:00:22,423
Here she is.
11
00:00:23,557 --> 00:00:25,159
Thank you.
12
00:00:25,193 --> 00:00:27,095
As much pain as I've been in,
13
00:00:27,128 --> 00:00:29,197
I can't imagine
what it's been like for you...
14
00:00:29,230 --> 00:00:32,533
Living in a Gina-less world
for two months.
15
00:00:32,566 --> 00:00:34,835
I'll field some questions now.
Anyone?
16
00:00:34,868 --> 00:00:37,505
Uh, how long do you have to
wear the... the...
17
00:00:37,538 --> 00:00:40,074
Metal... the head holder...
18
00:00:40,108 --> 00:00:41,175
It's called a halo.
19
00:00:41,209 --> 00:00:43,577
The doctor said I have to wear
it for another week.
20
00:00:43,611 --> 00:00:44,854
It's drilled into my skull here.
21
00:00:44,878 --> 00:00:49,283
And, yes, I can still hear the
screws squeaking into the bone.
22
00:00:49,317 --> 00:00:50,560
So what was it like
getting hit by a bus?
23
00:00:50,584 --> 00:00:52,520
- It was awesome.
- Ah, I knew it.
24
00:00:52,553 --> 00:00:54,388
I always wanted
to get hit by a bus.
25
00:00:54,422 --> 00:00:57,391
Yeah, I mean, I was legally
dead for two full minutes.
26
00:00:57,425 --> 00:00:59,193
- And I met God.
- Tight.
27
00:00:59,227 --> 00:01:01,395
What does she look like?
Ethnically ambiguous.
28
00:01:01,429 --> 00:01:02,530
You took two weeks off
29
00:01:02,563 --> 00:01:04,365
when Kourtney
and Scott Disick broke up.
30
00:01:04,398 --> 00:01:06,243
Are you sure you're ready
to be back at work now?
31
00:01:06,267 --> 00:01:07,377
What are you saying, Terry?
32
00:01:07,401 --> 00:01:09,370
You think I can't handle
being back yet?
33
00:01:09,403 --> 00:01:11,272
Watch this.
34
00:01:16,677 --> 00:01:18,846
♪
35
00:01:21,549 --> 00:01:24,252
♪
36
00:01:24,285 --> 00:01:26,254
Gina Linetti is back, baby!
37
00:01:29,290 --> 00:01:36,364
♪
38
00:01:46,274 --> 00:01:48,609
Sorry I'm late. I was
on a call with One Police Plaza.
39
00:01:48,642 --> 00:01:51,912
Apparently crime in Brooklyn
is down significantly.
40
00:01:51,945 --> 00:01:53,581
Which means
41
00:01:53,614 --> 00:01:55,549
they'll be permanently closing
one precinct.
42
00:01:55,583 --> 00:01:57,518
- What?
- We celebrated too soon.
43
00:01:57,551 --> 00:01:59,520
An auditor will arrive shortly.
44
00:01:59,553 --> 00:02:01,622
He'll evaluate us
on crime stats,
45
00:02:01,655 --> 00:02:03,924
physical plant,
fiscal responsibility.
46
00:02:03,957 --> 00:02:06,260
There are 22 other precincts
in Brooklyn,
47
00:02:06,294 --> 00:02:08,229
so we just don't want to rate
at the bottom.
48
00:02:08,262 --> 00:02:09,506
Are they gonna be looking
in our desks?
49
00:02:09,530 --> 00:02:10,631
Also, unrelated...
50
00:02:10,664 --> 00:02:12,400
Someone left a bunch of swords
in my desk.
51
00:02:12,433 --> 00:02:14,311
I have a similar question
about browser histories.
52
00:02:14,335 --> 00:02:16,237
- Just throw your computer away.
- Roger that.
53
00:02:16,270 --> 00:02:18,415
The auditor will start
by joining Peralta and Santiago
54
00:02:18,439 --> 00:02:19,907
on their gang stakeout because...
55
00:02:19,940 --> 00:02:21,742
They're America's dream couple.
56
00:02:21,775 --> 00:02:23,644
You need to calm down.
We're in a workplace.
57
00:02:23,677 --> 00:02:25,546
Because their case
is a good example
58
00:02:25,579 --> 00:02:27,648
of the type of serious crime
that still exists
59
00:02:27,681 --> 00:02:28,916
in our neighborhood.
60
00:02:28,949 --> 00:02:30,518
So... Oh.
61
00:02:30,551 --> 00:02:32,453
Looks like the auditor is here.
62
00:02:32,486 --> 00:02:33,454
Isn't that Teddy...
63
00:02:33,487 --> 00:02:34,655
- Amy's ex-boyfriend?
- Yep.
64
00:02:34,688 --> 00:02:35,656
Jake, didn't you break them up?
65
00:02:35,689 --> 00:02:36,924
Yep.
66
00:02:36,957 --> 00:02:37,725
Amy, didn't you tell him
to his face
67
00:02:37,758 --> 00:02:39,193
he was
the most boring man alive?
68
00:02:39,227 --> 00:02:40,504
- Yep.
- This is gonna be awkward.
69
00:02:40,528 --> 00:02:41,605
- Both: Yep.
- We had a good run.
70
00:02:41,629 --> 00:02:42,930
Let's not panic just yet.
71
00:02:42,963 --> 00:02:44,408
Maybe he doesn't remember us
ruining his life
72
00:02:44,432 --> 00:02:45,542
and stomping all over his heart.
73
00:02:45,566 --> 00:02:46,734
Hey, everyone.
74
00:02:46,767 --> 00:02:48,336
I'm Sergeant Wells.
75
00:02:48,369 --> 00:02:49,770
Jake, Amy, nice to see you.
76
00:02:49,803 --> 00:02:51,272
Teddy, nice to see you, too.
77
00:02:51,305 --> 00:02:52,716
Excited to have you
in the field with us.
78
00:02:52,740 --> 00:02:55,643
Good. I just hope
I don't bore you to death.
79
00:02:55,676 --> 00:02:57,411
Ah, what?
80
00:02:57,445 --> 00:02:59,547
Yeah. What's that?
The crime phone is ringing?
81
00:02:59,580 --> 00:03:00,690
We have to answer it.
Come on, Amy.
82
00:03:00,714 --> 00:03:02,250
- BRB.
- Okay.
83
00:03:02,283 --> 00:03:03,527
Why'd you have to say
he was boring?
84
00:03:03,551 --> 00:03:04,485
Because he is boring.
85
00:03:04,518 --> 00:03:06,787
His favorite app
on his phone is "contacts."
86
00:03:06,820 --> 00:03:07,897
He's gonna shut this place down,
87
00:03:07,921 --> 00:03:09,666
and we're gonna get shipped off
to separate precincts.
88
00:03:09,690 --> 00:03:11,435
I don't think our relationship
can survive that.
89
00:03:11,459 --> 00:03:12,769
I mean, even if we
don't work together,
90
00:03:12,793 --> 00:03:13,927
we can still be a couple.
91
00:03:13,961 --> 00:03:16,297
If I don't see you every day,
I will forget who you are.
92
00:03:16,330 --> 00:03:17,765
I'm like a goldfish.
93
00:03:17,798 --> 00:03:19,567
Standing in the briefing room...
94
00:03:19,600 --> 00:03:22,436
A space that is approximately
50 feet by 40 feet.
95
00:03:22,470 --> 00:03:25,406
Actually, you know what?
55 feet by 40 feet.
96
00:03:25,439 --> 00:03:28,676
No, 52 feet by 41 feet.
97
00:03:28,709 --> 00:03:30,820
I'll just look at the blueprints
at the City Planner's office.
98
00:03:30,844 --> 00:03:32,580
Hello, weekend plans.
99
00:03:32,613 --> 00:03:34,782
Sergeant Wells, have you been
to other precincts yet?
100
00:03:34,815 --> 00:03:36,317
How'd they do?
101
00:03:36,350 --> 00:03:37,727
Well, you know,
everyone's got their issues.
102
00:03:37,751 --> 00:03:38,819
That's too bad.
103
00:03:38,852 --> 00:03:41,255
I want all my brothers
in the NYPD to do perfectly.
104
00:03:41,289 --> 00:03:42,832
The Seven-Four is corrupt.
You didn't hear it from me.
105
00:03:42,856 --> 00:03:45,001
You know what? We're just
looking to eliminate waste.
106
00:03:45,025 --> 00:03:47,328
I assure you,
you'll find zero waste here.
107
00:03:47,361 --> 00:03:48,696
Really? Because I did notice
108
00:03:48,729 --> 00:03:50,664
during my preliminary
examination
109
00:03:50,698 --> 00:03:53,667
that you recently purchased
a $21,000 copy machine?
110
00:03:53,701 --> 00:03:57,638
Well, that machine saves money
in terms of man-hours.
111
00:03:57,671 --> 00:03:59,373
Uh, if you excuse me,
Sergeant Wells,
112
00:03:59,407 --> 00:04:00,708
we need to go to the BRB.
113
00:04:00,741 --> 00:04:03,344
It's BRB time. We're BRB-ing.
114
00:04:03,377 --> 00:04:04,678
- Make space.
- You make space!
115
00:04:04,712 --> 00:04:06,490
This closet is for people
who are freaking out.
116
00:04:06,514 --> 00:04:07,624
Oh, I'm fully freaking out.
117
00:04:07,648 --> 00:04:10,584
I just experimented with
an unfamiliar acronym in public.
118
00:04:10,618 --> 00:04:12,620
BRB... what does it even mean?
Be right back.
119
00:04:12,653 --> 00:04:14,464
It has the same number
of syllables as the acronym.
120
00:04:14,488 --> 00:04:15,723
What's the point?
121
00:04:15,756 --> 00:04:17,334
Teddy knows
about the fancy Japanese copier
122
00:04:17,358 --> 00:04:18,326
that C.J. bought...
123
00:04:18,359 --> 00:04:20,119
The one that broke
the first time we used it.
124
00:04:25,499 --> 00:04:26,767
Is it supposed to do that?
125
00:04:26,800 --> 00:04:28,869
It was not supposed to do that.
126
00:04:28,902 --> 00:04:30,771
Is this where people
are freaking out?
127
00:04:30,804 --> 00:04:31,848
Because we are freaking out.
128
00:04:31,872 --> 00:04:33,683
Teddy dinged the One-Five
for having roaches.
129
00:04:33,707 --> 00:04:35,309
So what? We don't have roaches.
130
00:04:35,343 --> 00:04:36,410
Our rats ate all of them.
131
00:04:36,444 --> 00:04:37,345
That's the problem.
We have rats.
132
00:04:37,378 --> 00:04:38,422
Right, right, right, right,
that's worse.
133
00:04:38,446 --> 00:04:40,324
Oh, God, they're gonna shut
this precinct down
134
00:04:40,348 --> 00:04:41,515
and separate me and Jake.
135
00:04:41,549 --> 00:04:42,750
Our friendship is over.
136
00:04:42,783 --> 00:04:44,728
If he doesn't see my face every
day, he'll forget who I am.
137
00:04:44,752 --> 00:04:46,654
He's like a goldfish.
138
00:04:46,687 --> 00:04:47,655
This is all your fault.
139
00:04:47,688 --> 00:04:49,590
You just had to sleep
with Teddy, didn't you?
140
00:04:49,623 --> 00:04:50,558
You couldn't keep it
in your pants.
141
00:04:50,591 --> 00:04:52,393
- Come on, Charles.
- He's right, Santiago.
142
00:04:52,426 --> 00:04:54,061
Your libido
has endangered us all.
143
00:04:54,094 --> 00:04:55,696
Excuse me, guys, coming in.
144
00:04:55,729 --> 00:04:57,731
Wait. Gina, you sure
you can fit in?
145
00:04:57,765 --> 00:05:00,768
I'm sorry. Because of my
injury, I can no longer fit in?
146
00:05:00,801 --> 00:05:01,669
No, I meant physically.
147
00:05:01,702 --> 00:05:02,703
I'll have you know,
148
00:05:02,736 --> 00:05:04,838
I am physically as strong
as I've ever been...
149
00:05:04,872 --> 00:05:06,607
Stronger even.
150
00:05:06,640 --> 00:05:09,677
I'm Gina Linetti,
and I can do anything, okay?
151
00:05:09,710 --> 00:05:11,845
Excuse me, please. Excuse me.
152
00:05:13,514 --> 00:05:14,815
Oh, yeah, this is too crowded.
153
00:05:14,848 --> 00:05:16,917
Shouldn't have wasted my speech
on this moment.
154
00:05:16,950 --> 00:05:18,118
To the evidence room.
155
00:05:18,151 --> 00:05:18,952
You two need to figure out
156
00:05:18,986 --> 00:05:20,588
how to patch things up
with Teddy.
157
00:05:20,621 --> 00:05:22,131
He's still upset
that I called him boring.
158
00:05:22,155 --> 00:05:23,700
We just have to pretend
that he's interesting.
159
00:05:23,724 --> 00:05:25,435
I got pretty good at it
while we were dating.
160
00:05:25,459 --> 00:05:26,727
We just have to smile and nod
161
00:05:26,760 --> 00:05:28,729
and agree with whatever
he said last.
162
00:05:28,762 --> 00:05:30,398
Great. Hey, wait a minute.
163
00:05:30,431 --> 00:05:31,665
I'm still not sure
164
00:05:31,699 --> 00:05:33,477
who the second-best "Die Hard"
villain is, though, you know?
165
00:05:33,501 --> 00:05:34,735
Probably Jeremy Irons.
166
00:05:34,768 --> 00:05:36,846
But maybe it's Timothy Olyphant,
or it could be William Atherton.
167
00:05:36,870 --> 00:05:38,606
- Definitely the last one.
- Right?
168
00:05:38,639 --> 00:05:40,441
No, I really think
it's William Atherton.
169
00:05:40,474 --> 00:05:41,609
Okay.
170
00:05:41,642 --> 00:05:43,687
We have to engage him
on topics that he cares about.
171
00:05:43,711 --> 00:05:46,614
Pilsners... he loves talking
about pilsners.
172
00:05:46,647 --> 00:05:49,116
Oh, my God. Just saying the word
gives me PTSD.
173
00:05:49,149 --> 00:05:50,117
Pilsner-TSD.
174
00:05:50,150 --> 00:05:51,552
- Good one.
- Thanks.
175
00:05:51,585 --> 00:05:52,386
Pull yourself together
176
00:05:52,420 --> 00:05:53,387
and go out there
and make Teddy feel
177
00:05:53,421 --> 00:05:54,287
like he's the most interesting
man on Earth.
178
00:05:54,321 --> 00:05:56,724
I want him to think
he's Andy Borowitz
179
00:05:56,757 --> 00:05:57,934
- when this is all done.
- On it.
180
00:05:57,958 --> 00:06:00,728
We'll go there and make him feel
like whoever that person is.
181
00:06:00,761 --> 00:06:01,962
Let's go.
182
00:06:01,995 --> 00:06:05,132
Okay, now what we need to do
is fix that infernal copier.
183
00:06:05,165 --> 00:06:06,767
Jeffords, you did a year abroad
in Tokyo.
184
00:06:06,800 --> 00:06:09,470
Maybe you can figure out
the manual. It's in Japanese.
185
00:06:09,503 --> 00:06:11,748
I can try, but the only thing
I really remember how to say
186
00:06:11,772 --> 00:06:14,408
is, "Do you have a bigger door
I can enter through?"
187
00:06:14,442 --> 00:06:15,619
Bring me solutions,
not problems.
188
00:06:15,643 --> 00:06:16,753
Now, what do we do
about the rats?
189
00:06:16,777 --> 00:06:18,145
Well, lucky for us,
190
00:06:18,178 --> 00:06:20,648
I have recently come into
a lot of wolf urine.
191
00:06:20,681 --> 00:06:21,915
That's lucky for us how?
192
00:06:21,949 --> 00:06:24,485
It creates a scent impression
that there are predators nearby.
193
00:06:24,518 --> 00:06:26,620
I've been dousing
Nikolaj's shoes with it
194
00:06:26,654 --> 00:06:27,864
to scare off bullies
at his preschool.
195
00:06:27,888 --> 00:06:29,757
- Did it work?
- No, now they call him pee boy.
196
00:06:29,790 --> 00:06:31,692
He's much worse off.
197
00:06:31,725 --> 00:06:34,495
But wolf urine
definitely scares off rats.
198
00:06:34,528 --> 00:06:36,630
We can use it to herd them
toward the traps.
199
00:06:36,664 --> 00:06:38,466
What about me?
Like, what should I do?
200
00:06:38,499 --> 00:06:40,534
I just thought
maybe you could take it easy.
201
00:06:40,568 --> 00:06:41,878
It's your first day and...
I'll have you know,
202
00:06:41,902 --> 00:06:44,772
I am as strong physically
as I have ever been...
203
00:06:44,805 --> 00:06:46,607
Stronger even.
You already did this.
204
00:06:46,640 --> 00:06:48,509
Yeah, I have short-term amnesia.
205
00:06:48,542 --> 00:06:49,777
I got hit by a bus.
206
00:06:49,810 --> 00:06:52,746
But don't worry. I am as strong
physically as I have ever been...
207
00:06:52,780 --> 00:06:53,614
Stronger even.
208
00:06:53,647 --> 00:06:55,207
Fine. You can help me
with the copier.
209
00:06:56,817 --> 00:07:00,754
Detectives have chosen
an adequate location
210
00:07:00,788 --> 00:07:01,889
for their stakeout.
211
00:07:01,922 --> 00:07:03,657
Teddy, how's it going, my man?
212
00:07:03,691 --> 00:07:05,469
Nice to see you. I'm glad we get
to spend this time together.
213
00:07:05,493 --> 00:07:06,770
I haven't seen you since...
You broke me and Amy up.
214
00:07:06,794 --> 00:07:08,028
Maybe. Probably not.
215
00:07:08,061 --> 00:07:09,963
Who can say when people
last saw people?
216
00:07:09,997 --> 00:07:13,667
Anyway, that's the HQ
for the 8th Street Killas.
217
00:07:13,701 --> 00:07:15,903
We think they're meeting up
with leaders of another gang
218
00:07:15,936 --> 00:07:17,805
to possibly merge organizations.
219
00:07:17,838 --> 00:07:18,739
Detectives demonstrate
220
00:07:18,772 --> 00:07:20,674
a passable knowledge
of their operation.
221
00:07:20,708 --> 00:07:23,210
Cool. So, hey, we might be
here for a while.
222
00:07:23,243 --> 00:07:25,813
Can I offer you a beverage? Ooh.
223
00:07:25,846 --> 00:07:27,548
Diet ginger ale...
That is my favorite.
224
00:07:27,581 --> 00:07:29,817
Actually, I shouldn't.
It'll make me all hyper.
225
00:07:29,850 --> 00:07:32,553
Suit yourself.
Too bad we're on the job, right?
226
00:07:32,586 --> 00:07:34,063
Could've stocked that thing
with pilsners.
227
00:07:34,087 --> 00:07:35,756
- You like pilsners?
- Are you kidding me?
228
00:07:35,789 --> 00:07:36,990
I kills for the pils.
229
00:07:37,024 --> 00:07:38,826
I'm a total pils-nerd.
230
00:07:43,797 --> 00:07:46,500
What's your poison...
German or Bohemian?
231
00:07:46,534 --> 00:07:48,702
- The last one that you said.
- Good choice.
232
00:07:48,736 --> 00:07:50,604
The last one always is.
Wow. This is fun.
233
00:07:50,638 --> 00:07:53,040
I could talk with you
about pilsners all day.
234
00:07:53,073 --> 00:07:54,074
Oh, let's do it.
235
00:07:54,107 --> 00:07:55,809
Of the Bohemians,
what's your fave?
236
00:07:55,843 --> 00:07:58,846
Scharfen... grelderbrau.
237
00:07:58,879 --> 00:08:00,648
It's new. Millennials love it.
238
00:08:00,681 --> 00:08:01,691
Cool. Let me make note of that.
239
00:08:01,715 --> 00:08:05,719
Just caught Detectives S and P
in a bald-faced lie.
240
00:08:05,753 --> 00:08:07,521
You don't like pilsners.
You hate pilsners.
241
00:08:07,555 --> 00:08:09,533
You think they're boring,
and you still think I'm boring.
242
00:08:09,557 --> 00:08:11,058
No. No lie.
243
00:08:11,091 --> 00:08:12,860
Detectives S and P didn't lie.
244
00:08:12,893 --> 00:08:14,828
Detectives S and P no lie.
245
00:08:17,631 --> 00:08:19,132
Sergeant, please tell me
246
00:08:19,166 --> 00:08:21,535
this malfunctioning copier
isn't gonna sink our precinct.
247
00:08:21,569 --> 00:08:22,612
I figured out how to turn it on,
248
00:08:22,636 --> 00:08:25,606
but the screen just shows
a cartoon turtle sobbing.
249
00:08:25,639 --> 00:08:26,716
Perhaps it's a paper jam.
250
00:08:26,740 --> 00:08:28,585
And what about when
the little sushi roll comes out
251
00:08:28,609 --> 00:08:30,010
and cuts the turtle's head off?
252
00:08:30,043 --> 00:08:31,278
- Toner issue.
- Why?
253
00:08:31,311 --> 00:08:33,113
Anyway, I started
taking it apart,
254
00:08:33,146 --> 00:08:36,149
but it's been a slow process
for some reason.
255
00:08:36,183 --> 00:08:38,118
Hey, Captain, I'm glad
you're here to see this.
256
00:08:38,151 --> 00:08:39,553
I'm just about to drink my tea.
257
00:08:39,587 --> 00:08:41,188
Terry.
258
00:08:48,696 --> 00:08:50,631
Can't even tell
I was hit by a bus.
259
00:08:50,664 --> 00:08:52,600
That's how independent I am.
260
00:08:52,633 --> 00:08:54,101
Well, perhaps Boyle and Diaz
261
00:08:54,134 --> 00:08:56,036
have made more progress
with the rats.
262
00:08:56,069 --> 00:08:57,313
We've made
absolutely no progress.
263
00:08:57,337 --> 00:08:58,447
It took forever
to bait the traps
264
00:08:58,471 --> 00:09:00,684
because Scully kept eating
the peanut butter out of them.
265
00:09:00,708 --> 00:09:02,676
You can't prove it was me, Rosa.
266
00:09:02,710 --> 00:09:03,787
Now we're gonna use
the wolf urine
267
00:09:03,811 --> 00:09:06,046
to flush the rats out
of the walls and into our traps.
268
00:09:06,079 --> 00:09:08,716
That's where I come in.
I'm going up in the ceiling.
269
00:09:08,749 --> 00:09:10,359
- Why are you dressed like that?
- Mobility.
270
00:09:10,383 --> 00:09:11,985
It's a good thing I still have
271
00:09:12,019 --> 00:09:13,621
my sexy-cat costume
from Halloween.
272
00:09:13,654 --> 00:09:14,521
I really don't think
273
00:09:14,554 --> 00:09:15,565
you were the target audience
for that item.
274
00:09:15,589 --> 00:09:18,025
There is nothing gendered
about a sexy cat.
275
00:09:18,058 --> 00:09:21,161
Now, please hand me that big jug
of wolf pee I rub on my kid.
276
00:09:21,194 --> 00:09:24,031
Okay, Teddy, let's not
evaluate rashly here, all right?
277
00:09:24,064 --> 00:09:25,065
It's a misunderstanding.
278
00:09:25,098 --> 00:09:26,667
We're not saying
pilsners are boring.
279
00:09:26,700 --> 00:09:28,368
We're saying
that we are too boring
280
00:09:28,401 --> 00:09:30,237
to appreciate them properly...
281
00:09:30,270 --> 00:09:32,606
Is what I'm going with.
Jake, I agree with you.
282
00:09:32,640 --> 00:09:34,317
Pilsners are boring. That's why
I don't drink them anymore.
283
00:09:34,341 --> 00:09:36,043
- Say what now?
- Amy was right.
284
00:09:36,076 --> 00:09:37,978
When we were going together,
I was boring.
285
00:09:38,011 --> 00:09:39,355
It took our breakup
for me to realize that.
286
00:09:39,379 --> 00:09:41,314
So you're not still mad at me?
287
00:09:41,348 --> 00:09:43,383
No, no, no, you changed me.
I found my wild side.
288
00:09:43,416 --> 00:09:45,252
My girlfriend and I do 5Ks now.
289
00:09:45,285 --> 00:09:47,387
We took a two-week trip
to San Diego last year.
290
00:09:47,420 --> 00:09:49,389
The energy of that place
is electric.
291
00:09:49,422 --> 00:09:51,692
But back at the precinct,
you said,
292
00:09:51,725 --> 00:09:53,326
"I hope I don't bore you
to death."
293
00:09:53,360 --> 00:09:55,763
That was a joke.
294
00:09:55,796 --> 00:09:57,998
Humor is the tool
of the interesting.
295
00:09:58,031 --> 00:10:00,400
Right. A tool that you
have clearly mastered.
296
00:10:00,433 --> 00:10:02,369
Ooh, get this...
My lady turned me on
297
00:10:02,402 --> 00:10:04,371
to something called
adult coloring books,
298
00:10:04,404 --> 00:10:06,707
which we do at... wait for it...
299
00:10:06,740 --> 00:10:08,308
Jazz brunches. What?
300
00:10:08,341 --> 00:10:11,378
Aha. Wow. It's like brunch
is crazy enough on its own,
301
00:10:11,411 --> 00:10:13,113
then you throw jazz in the mix.
302
00:10:13,146 --> 00:10:15,382
It's like, "Why are we even
doing this?"
303
00:10:19,419 --> 00:10:21,388
Oh, my God, that is...
304
00:10:21,421 --> 00:10:23,724
This is fun. I have not laughed
this much in a long time.
305
00:10:23,757 --> 00:10:24,858
Twice.
306
00:10:24,892 --> 00:10:26,670
Reminder... invite Jake and Amy
to jazz brunch tomorrow.
307
00:10:26,694 --> 00:10:28,328
Uh, reminder... we're in.
308
00:10:28,361 --> 00:10:30,006
Good. But I am actually gonna
email you the invite,
309
00:10:30,030 --> 00:10:31,431
if you could just RSVP to that.
310
00:10:31,464 --> 00:10:33,276
I'd feel better if everyone
had it on their calendars.
311
00:10:33,300 --> 00:10:34,377
Copy that.
We all have calendars.
312
00:10:34,401 --> 00:10:36,770
So that'll work out great,
'cause we all have one.
313
00:10:36,804 --> 00:10:38,405
How's it going with the copier?
314
00:10:38,438 --> 00:10:39,406
Not great.
315
00:10:39,439 --> 00:10:41,274
I got through
to customer service,
316
00:10:41,308 --> 00:10:43,376
but I really don't remember
that much Japanese.
317
00:10:46,479 --> 00:10:48,415
Hey, Captain.
Update on the rat situation.
318
00:10:48,448 --> 00:10:49,349
Wolf pee's in place,
319
00:10:49,382 --> 00:10:50,459
and the traps are set
in the evidence room.
320
00:10:50,483 --> 00:10:52,786
I thought we were luring them
into the break room.
321
00:10:52,820 --> 00:10:54,688
No, Gina needed it
for meditation.
322
00:10:54,722 --> 00:10:58,225
You are strong. You are wise.
323
00:10:58,258 --> 00:11:02,462
You will have your revenge
on all New York City buses.
324
00:11:02,495 --> 00:11:04,064
- Everything else is good?
- Not quite.
325
00:11:04,097 --> 00:11:05,265
We have a Charles situation.
326
00:11:05,298 --> 00:11:06,409
Well, how stuck are you, Boyle?
327
00:11:06,433 --> 00:11:07,600
Completely.
328
00:11:07,634 --> 00:11:10,403
My tail seems to have gotten
knotted around a sprinkler.
329
00:11:10,437 --> 00:11:11,471
I think I can pull it.
330
00:11:11,504 --> 00:11:12,873
No, that might break the pipe.
331
00:11:12,906 --> 00:11:14,441
The last thing we need
is a flood.
332
00:11:14,474 --> 00:11:16,452
That's okay. I'm sure
you'll have me down in no time.
333
00:11:16,476 --> 00:11:18,321
Incorrect. That would make
a hole in the ceiling.
334
00:11:18,345 --> 00:11:19,446
You're there till Monday.
335
00:11:19,479 --> 00:11:20,824
We'll bring you some food
in a bucket.
336
00:11:20,848 --> 00:11:22,315
Sir, I really think...
337
00:11:22,349 --> 00:11:23,416
He'll be fine.
338
00:11:23,450 --> 00:11:25,085
Guava juice, mango juice,
339
00:11:25,118 --> 00:11:25,986
orange juice, of course,
340
00:11:26,019 --> 00:11:29,222
grapefruit juice,
and cranberry juice.
341
00:11:29,256 --> 00:11:31,424
Jazz brunch sounds insane.
342
00:11:31,458 --> 00:11:34,294
But should we talk
about how efficient and well run
343
00:11:34,327 --> 00:11:35,438
the Nine-Nine is for a while?
344
00:11:35,462 --> 00:11:36,830
We got plenty of time for that.
345
00:11:36,864 --> 00:11:37,664
I'm gonna hit
the little boys' room.
346
00:11:37,697 --> 00:11:38,875
When I get back,
remind me to tell you
347
00:11:38,899 --> 00:11:40,200
all about
the omelet-bar station.
348
00:11:40,233 --> 00:11:41,334
- We will.
- You bet.
349
00:11:41,368 --> 00:11:42,870
Spoiler alert...
350
00:11:42,903 --> 00:11:44,304
two kinds of bell pepper.
351
00:11:44,337 --> 00:11:47,474
Oh, my God, he's so boring.
352
00:11:47,507 --> 00:11:49,376
- He's so boring.
- Most boring man in America.
353
00:11:49,409 --> 00:11:51,178
And that's him
trying to be interesting.
354
00:11:51,211 --> 00:11:52,412
That is Spring Break Teddy.
355
00:11:52,445 --> 00:11:54,181
How did you ever date him?
356
00:11:54,214 --> 00:11:56,449
Oh, no, he has
a really big wiener, doesn't he?
357
00:11:56,483 --> 00:11:58,427
Wait. Don't tell me
if that's true, unless it's not.
358
00:11:58,451 --> 00:12:00,429
No, but then if you don't say
anything, I'll know that it is.
359
00:12:00,453 --> 00:12:02,465
Oh, why aren't you saying
anything about his wiener, Amy?
360
00:12:02,489 --> 00:12:03,390
- Jake.
- Stop, stop, stop, stop.
361
00:12:03,423 --> 00:12:05,192
I don't want to hear
about your ex's wiener.
362
00:12:05,225 --> 00:12:06,302
Just... you're not making me
feel better.
363
00:12:06,326 --> 00:12:09,196
Why would you do this to me?
Jake, stop spiraling.
364
00:12:09,229 --> 00:12:10,940
Every time you shake me,
I see it flopping around.
365
00:12:10,964 --> 00:12:13,200
Stop. Oh, look,
there's our gang leader.
366
00:12:13,233 --> 00:12:15,836
Seriously?
367
00:12:16,870 --> 00:12:19,539
Wow. Perfect timing,
successful stakeout.
368
00:12:19,572 --> 00:12:21,374
There's no way
that Sergeant Boring Big Wiener
369
00:12:21,408 --> 00:12:22,876
will shut us down now.
370
00:12:22,910 --> 00:12:25,145
- Shh. I think I hear Teddy.
- You didn't answer.
371
00:12:25,178 --> 00:12:26,479
Forgot the old phonester.
372
00:12:26,513 --> 00:12:28,415
I like to go through my contacts
while I go pee.
373
00:12:28,448 --> 00:12:30,359
So you only need to use
one hand... that's great.
374
00:12:30,383 --> 00:12:32,185
Oh, look,
it was still recording.
375
00:12:32,219 --> 00:12:33,329
Like, recording recording?
376
00:12:33,353 --> 00:12:34,487
Yeah.
377
00:12:34,521 --> 00:12:37,390
- Oh, this is bad.
- What? What's wrong?
378
00:12:37,424 --> 00:12:38,902
Oh, my God.
It was recording the whole time.
379
00:12:38,926 --> 00:12:39,936
We said all that bad stuff.
380
00:12:39,960 --> 00:12:42,162
Sorry. I was so preoccupied
with the wiener stuff.
381
00:12:42,195 --> 00:12:43,496
Oh, this is bad.
382
00:12:43,530 --> 00:12:46,166
But while I have you,
just stop me.
383
00:12:49,136 --> 00:12:50,971
I know accepting Teddy's
jazz-brunch invite
384
00:12:51,004 --> 00:12:52,081
was the only way
to get his phone back
385
00:12:52,105 --> 00:12:53,073
and save the Nine-Nine,
386
00:12:53,106 --> 00:12:55,108
but this place
is literally hell.
387
00:12:55,142 --> 00:12:57,945
♪ Eggs Benedict
in a lickety split ♪
388
00:12:57,978 --> 00:12:59,246
She's doing jazz about brunch.
389
00:12:59,279 --> 00:13:00,957
Maybe it's not too late
to get out of here.
390
00:13:00,981 --> 00:13:02,850
We could start a new life
in the country,
391
00:13:02,883 --> 00:13:03,927
maybe open a small bookstore.
392
00:13:03,951 --> 00:13:05,953
How dare you tempt me
with a small bookstore?
393
00:13:05,986 --> 00:13:07,988
- We need to focus.
- Okay.
394
00:13:08,021 --> 00:13:09,156
Look, Teddy's over there.
395
00:13:09,189 --> 00:13:11,124
Oh, and he's
in fun, casual wear.
396
00:13:11,158 --> 00:13:12,969
His phone is out on the table,
like it always is,
397
00:13:12,993 --> 00:13:15,395
because he fears the radiation
will affect his testicles.
398
00:13:15,428 --> 00:13:17,040
Which are connected
to his average-sized...
399
00:13:17,064 --> 00:13:18,304
- Jake.
- Right. It's misshapen.
400
00:13:18,331 --> 00:13:19,266
That's all that matters.
401
00:13:19,299 --> 00:13:20,476
All right, here's the plan...
We stage a fight.
402
00:13:20,500 --> 00:13:23,003
It escalates, and I flip over
the table in dramatic fashion.
403
00:13:23,036 --> 00:13:23,937
Do we need the table flip?
404
00:13:23,971 --> 00:13:26,239
Amy, when the opportunity
presents itself
405
00:13:26,273 --> 00:13:28,976
to flip-a da table,
uh, you flip-a da table.
406
00:13:29,009 --> 00:13:30,253
And in the chaos,
you grab his phone,
407
00:13:30,277 --> 00:13:32,112
delete the recording,
and we're golden.
408
00:13:32,145 --> 00:13:34,982
Perfect. All right,
let's stage a fake fight.
409
00:13:35,015 --> 00:13:36,183
This'll be fun, right?
410
00:13:36,216 --> 00:13:38,061
Pretending like we have things
to be mad at each other about.
411
00:13:38,085 --> 00:13:39,987
Jake's chronic tardiness,
his slobbiness,
412
00:13:40,020 --> 00:13:41,855
and the fact
that he wasted half the morning
413
00:13:41,889 --> 00:13:42,899
deciding what sneakers to wear...
414
00:13:42,923 --> 00:13:45,058
Those are just some
of the reasons we're late.
415
00:13:45,092 --> 00:13:46,602
No one cares
about your sneakers, Jake.
416
00:13:46,626 --> 00:13:47,928
Yeah, very convincing.
417
00:13:47,961 --> 00:13:49,105
We're just glad
you guys made it.
418
00:13:49,129 --> 00:13:50,273
This is Rachel, my girlfriend.
419
00:13:50,297 --> 00:13:51,098
Hi.
420
00:13:51,131 --> 00:13:53,967
So Teddy said you guys
had such a blast
421
00:13:54,001 --> 00:13:55,969
at the stakeout.
Yes, it was incredible.
422
00:13:56,003 --> 00:13:58,014
Can I really quickly just say
the real reason we were late
423
00:13:58,038 --> 00:13:58,906
was that Amy insisted
424
00:13:58,939 --> 00:14:00,116
on brushing her teeth
for 30 minutes?
425
00:14:00,140 --> 00:14:02,976
Two minutes or one minute,
58 seconds longer than you did.
426
00:14:03,010 --> 00:14:04,945
Anyway, can we please
just talk to our friends?
427
00:14:04,978 --> 00:14:06,880
- Wow. Fine.
- Fine.
428
00:14:06,914 --> 00:14:07,747
- So, Rachel...
- Hmm?
429
00:14:07,780 --> 00:14:10,383
- How did you guys meet?
- Oh.
430
00:14:10,417 --> 00:14:12,119
Such a wild story.
431
00:14:12,152 --> 00:14:14,654
So I was on an elevator...
432
00:14:14,687 --> 00:14:17,457
and so was Teddy.
433
00:14:17,490 --> 00:14:20,227
- Oh, that's the whole story.
- I think it's romantic.
434
00:14:20,260 --> 00:14:22,963
I remember when our relationship
had magic moments like that
435
00:14:22,996 --> 00:14:24,064
before it went stale.
436
00:14:24,097 --> 00:14:25,265
- Stale?
- Mm.
437
00:14:25,298 --> 00:14:27,667
Okay, you want
some action, Jackson?
438
00:14:27,700 --> 00:14:30,270
Well, how about I make a scene?
439
00:14:30,303 --> 00:14:31,638
Whoa.
440
00:14:31,671 --> 00:14:34,674
What are you doing?
Flipa-ing de table.
441
00:14:36,276 --> 00:14:38,111
It's bolted down.
Oh, what a shock.
442
00:14:38,145 --> 00:14:39,679
You tried something and failed.
443
00:14:39,712 --> 00:14:41,114
Okay, you know what? That's it.
444
00:14:41,148 --> 00:14:43,050
I'm gonna slide it right off!
445
00:14:44,384 --> 00:14:46,253
I am so sorry.
I got carried away.
446
00:14:46,286 --> 00:14:48,088
I will now clean this up
entirely by myself.
447
00:14:48,121 --> 00:14:50,390
- No...
- No, please keep your eyes
448
00:14:50,423 --> 00:14:53,693
on me as I make
this sincere apology.
449
00:14:53,726 --> 00:14:56,263
I am sorry.
450
00:14:56,296 --> 00:14:58,999
It's okay. Something crazy
always happens at jazz brunch.
451
00:14:59,032 --> 00:14:59,899
It's the Wild West.
452
00:14:59,933 --> 00:15:02,402
Oh, man, Teddy,
look what happened.
453
00:15:02,435 --> 00:15:05,005
Your phone landed
directly in this glass of OJ.
454
00:15:05,038 --> 00:15:07,074
That seems almost impossible.
455
00:15:07,107 --> 00:15:08,117
"Almost" being the key word,
456
00:15:08,141 --> 00:15:10,010
but it happened for real,
and we all know it.
457
00:15:10,043 --> 00:15:11,144
There you go.
458
00:15:11,178 --> 00:15:13,080
That's it. You've gone too far.
459
00:15:13,113 --> 00:15:14,948
I am storming off now.
460
00:15:14,982 --> 00:15:18,351
No, you've gone too far,
and I'm storming off now!
461
00:15:18,385 --> 00:15:22,122
There's something
I'd like to show you, Captain.
462
00:15:25,458 --> 00:15:29,029
Terry... crushed... it.
463
00:15:29,062 --> 00:15:30,330
It works!
464
00:15:30,363 --> 00:15:33,100
I've never been more proud of
you for anything in your life.
465
00:15:33,133 --> 00:15:35,502
I mean, I've solved
a lot of cases for you.
466
00:15:35,535 --> 00:15:36,703
And yet crime has continued.
467
00:15:36,736 --> 00:15:37,880
I think we've done it, Captain.
468
00:15:37,904 --> 00:15:40,207
Just heard the traps go off.
Want to come check with us?
469
00:15:40,240 --> 00:15:41,975
- Of course. How's Boyle doing?
- He's fine.
470
00:15:42,009 --> 00:15:44,077
You know how quickly he submits
to his environment.
471
00:15:44,111 --> 00:15:46,079
Where are the rats?
472
00:15:46,113 --> 00:15:48,348
There's blood everywhere.
This is a horror scene.
473
00:15:48,381 --> 00:15:50,150
They must've chewed
themselves free.
474
00:15:50,183 --> 00:15:51,327
Detective Diaz,
what was in that box?
475
00:15:51,351 --> 00:15:53,386
It's from a closed case in 1986,
476
00:15:53,420 --> 00:15:55,564
when they busted the guy
that dealt to the New York Mets.
477
00:15:55,588 --> 00:15:57,724
My God, those rats have eaten
the purest cocaine
478
00:15:57,757 --> 00:15:59,126
in the history of this city.
479
00:15:59,159 --> 00:16:00,760
They know no fear or pain.
480
00:16:00,793 --> 00:16:03,196
And look!
They're back in the walls.
481
00:16:03,230 --> 00:16:05,065
Both: Boyle!
482
00:16:05,098 --> 00:16:07,300
Ah! The rats chewed
through the sprinkler pipe.
483
00:16:07,334 --> 00:16:09,069
They're coked up.
Get out of there.
484
00:16:09,102 --> 00:16:09,869
They think I'm a cat.
485
00:16:09,902 --> 00:16:12,172
Boyle, be careful
of the ceiling.
486
00:16:12,205 --> 00:16:13,306
Submit to them!
487
00:16:13,340 --> 00:16:14,541
Tell Jake I never panicked.
488
00:16:14,574 --> 00:16:16,076
Aah!
489
00:16:18,611 --> 00:16:20,547
- My copier!
- My precinct!
490
00:16:20,580 --> 00:16:22,149
Charles!
491
00:16:22,182 --> 00:16:23,416
Charles?
492
00:16:23,450 --> 00:16:26,286
Aah! They survived the fall!
493
00:16:26,319 --> 00:16:27,320
Run!
494
00:16:27,354 --> 00:16:30,057
That was fun. We're really
good at fake fighting.
495
00:16:30,090 --> 00:16:30,857
And you were amazing
at coming up
496
00:16:30,890 --> 00:16:32,292
with all that stuff
to be mad about.
497
00:16:32,325 --> 00:16:34,294
Yep, totally,
I just said all that stuff
498
00:16:34,327 --> 00:16:36,296
to save the precinct,
and that's all.
499
00:16:36,329 --> 00:16:39,232
Oh, my God. You don't
actually care about my sneakers.
500
00:16:39,266 --> 00:16:40,300
No!
501
00:16:40,333 --> 00:16:42,435
I care about them deeply.
502
00:16:42,469 --> 00:16:44,104
They're all so different.
503
00:16:44,137 --> 00:16:45,372
Okay.
504
00:16:45,405 --> 00:16:48,041
Hey, guys, it's Teddy
from jazz brunch.
505
00:16:48,075 --> 00:16:49,042
Hey, Teddy.
506
00:16:49,076 --> 00:16:50,043
It's Teddy from jazz brunch.
507
00:16:50,077 --> 00:16:51,187
- Why is he here?
- I don't know.
508
00:16:51,211 --> 00:16:52,355
But the fake fight's back on.
509
00:16:52,379 --> 00:16:56,116
So shut it, you bigmouthed bitch
and your stupid sneakers!
510
00:16:56,149 --> 00:16:57,793
If you don't like my shoes,
you can just tell me.
511
00:16:57,817 --> 00:17:00,053
Hi. Can I talk to you guys
about something?
512
00:17:00,087 --> 00:17:00,953
Actually, Teddy,
this is not a good time.
513
00:17:00,987 --> 00:17:02,098
We're still having
a pretty big fight.
514
00:17:02,122 --> 00:17:05,125
Well, I think what I'm about
to say may solve things.
515
00:17:05,158 --> 00:17:06,569
Amy, I'm still in love with you.
What?
516
00:17:06,593 --> 00:17:07,560
- What?
- What?
517
00:17:07,594 --> 00:17:08,628
Uh-oh.
518
00:17:10,863 --> 00:17:13,566
♪ This is super uncomfortable ♪
519
00:17:13,600 --> 00:17:15,034
Jazz.
520
00:17:17,170 --> 00:17:19,139
Okay. Okay, everybody
just calm down
521
00:17:19,172 --> 00:17:20,172
and take a deep breath.
522
00:17:22,175 --> 00:17:23,415
What the hell is going on, man?
523
00:17:23,443 --> 00:17:24,687
Yeah, what the hell is going on?
524
00:17:24,711 --> 00:17:26,446
You've got a girlfriend. I know.
525
00:17:26,479 --> 00:17:28,115
- And she's fine.
- Thanks.
526
00:17:28,148 --> 00:17:29,416
Sorry. I was really planning
527
00:17:29,449 --> 00:17:30,850
on you being
in the cab during this.
528
00:17:30,883 --> 00:17:32,228
Okay,
that wouldn't make it better.
529
00:17:32,252 --> 00:17:33,120
- No.
- Amy, I'm just...
530
00:17:33,153 --> 00:17:34,221
I'm not over you yet,
531
00:17:34,254 --> 00:17:35,755
and I would've never said
anything,
532
00:17:35,788 --> 00:17:37,624
because I thought
you and Jake were happy,
533
00:17:37,657 --> 00:17:38,767
but after seeing you
at jazz brunch,
534
00:17:38,791 --> 00:17:40,836
I think I might've been wrong.
Don't read into that.
535
00:17:40,860 --> 00:17:43,130
That was a freak argument.
We are very happy.
536
00:17:43,163 --> 00:17:44,697
Amy, we have
all the same interests.
537
00:17:44,731 --> 00:17:45,771
We have so much chemistry.
538
00:17:45,798 --> 00:17:46,833
When we're together,
539
00:17:46,866 --> 00:17:49,136
it's like, no matter
where we are, it's San Diego.
540
00:17:49,169 --> 00:17:50,879
I feel compelled to tell you
that San Diego's terrible.
541
00:17:50,903 --> 00:17:52,272
I'm gonna lay it
all on the line.
542
00:17:52,305 --> 00:17:54,107
Amy Santiago...
543
00:17:54,141 --> 00:17:56,209
will you marry me?
544
00:17:56,243 --> 00:17:57,177
- Both: What?
- What?
545
00:17:57,210 --> 00:17:58,145
Okay, really, could you stay
in the cab?
546
00:17:58,178 --> 00:17:59,788
I'm sorry.
I'll be right there. I promise.
547
00:17:59,812 --> 00:18:01,190
Or maybe I won't.
What's your answer?
548
00:18:01,214 --> 00:18:03,183
Teddy, I don't want to be
with you.
549
00:18:03,216 --> 00:18:05,594
But you want to be with him?
You guys have nothing in common.
550
00:18:05,618 --> 00:18:07,854
Oh, yeah?
Tell that to William Atherton...
551
00:18:07,887 --> 00:18:09,289
The man we both consider to be
552
00:18:09,322 --> 00:18:10,857
the second-best
"Die Hard" villain.
553
00:18:10,890 --> 00:18:12,192
She meant it.
554
00:18:12,225 --> 00:18:14,594
And also, yes,
we are different people,
555
00:18:14,627 --> 00:18:16,296
but I love that about us.
556
00:18:16,329 --> 00:18:17,864
I love that Jake's
a little messy
557
00:18:17,897 --> 00:18:20,600
and that he cares so much
about his dumb sneakers
558
00:18:20,633 --> 00:18:23,203
and he doesn't get stressed out
about calendars.
559
00:18:23,236 --> 00:18:25,838
- Or flossing my teeth.
- No, the non-flossing is crazy.
560
00:18:25,872 --> 00:18:27,207
Copy that, and I love you.
561
00:18:27,240 --> 00:18:28,208
I'm just so confused.
562
00:18:28,241 --> 00:18:29,885
Your fight was like something
out of a movie.
563
00:18:29,909 --> 00:18:32,179
- Teddy...
- No.
564
00:18:32,212 --> 00:18:33,289
I have to tell you the truth.
565
00:18:33,313 --> 00:18:34,781
No. Amy is dying.
566
00:18:34,814 --> 00:18:35,648
She has one month to live.
567
00:18:35,682 --> 00:18:37,584
Marrying her would be
a waste of time.
568
00:18:37,617 --> 00:18:39,162
Jake and I were only
pretending to fight
569
00:18:39,186 --> 00:18:40,753
so that we could destroy
your phone.
570
00:18:40,787 --> 00:18:43,156
While we were on the stakeout
and you were in the bathroom,
571
00:18:43,190 --> 00:18:45,292
we said you were
the most boring man in America,
572
00:18:45,325 --> 00:18:46,693
and your phone recorded it.
573
00:18:46,726 --> 00:18:47,860
I'm sorry.
574
00:18:47,894 --> 00:18:50,173
We didn't want you to get mad
at us and fail the precinct.
575
00:18:50,197 --> 00:18:52,832
Wow. You guys are the worst.
576
00:18:52,865 --> 00:18:54,610
Well, you just proposed
in front of your girlfriend,
577
00:18:54,634 --> 00:18:55,702
so potato, po-tah-to.
578
00:18:55,735 --> 00:18:57,270
Amy, I loved you.
579
00:18:59,239 --> 00:19:00,316
All right,
I'm ready to go, Rachel.
580
00:19:00,340 --> 00:19:01,808
Should we hit up
the Tenement Museum?
581
00:19:01,841 --> 00:19:03,176
No!
582
00:19:03,210 --> 00:19:04,744
I talked to NYPD facilities
583
00:19:04,777 --> 00:19:06,589
to see if they could get
an emergency cleanup crew
584
00:19:06,613 --> 00:19:07,714
out to us this afternoon.
585
00:19:07,747 --> 00:19:10,217
I received
their standard response.
586
00:19:12,619 --> 00:19:13,786
This is on you, Boyle.
587
00:19:13,820 --> 00:19:15,964
You couldn't just suck it up
and let a few dozen crazed rats
588
00:19:15,988 --> 00:19:17,524
eat you until
their hearts exploded?
589
00:19:17,557 --> 00:19:18,658
Don't blame Boyle.
590
00:19:18,691 --> 00:19:19,968
The rats only got
into the cocaine
591
00:19:19,992 --> 00:19:21,928
because you put the traps
in the evidence room.
592
00:19:21,961 --> 00:19:23,706
We were gonna use the break
room, but Gina was in there,
593
00:19:23,730 --> 00:19:26,299
and she got hit by a damn bus,
so nobody can say no to her.
594
00:19:26,333 --> 00:19:27,734
That's it.
595
00:19:27,767 --> 00:19:29,936
Nobody can say no to her.
596
00:19:32,839 --> 00:19:35,275
Answer's still no.
597
00:19:35,308 --> 00:19:38,311
Right, but maybe you should
speak to my colleague first.
598
00:19:39,912 --> 00:19:43,283
Hi. I got hit by a bus.
599
00:19:44,317 --> 00:19:46,286
Wow. This place looks amazing.
600
00:19:46,319 --> 00:19:48,855
Yes, thanks to Gina.
She's responsible for all of it.
601
00:19:48,888 --> 00:19:49,922
She's an inspiration.
602
00:19:49,956 --> 00:19:51,291
Thank you, Captain.
603
00:19:51,324 --> 00:19:52,925
You have permission
to share my story.
604
00:19:52,959 --> 00:19:54,994
So how'd it go
with Sergeant Wells?
605
00:19:55,027 --> 00:19:56,863
Let's see. He proposed to Amy.
606
00:19:56,896 --> 00:19:59,232
She said no, and then
his girlfriend dumped him.
607
00:19:59,266 --> 00:20:00,976
- Terry's getting nervous.
- It's worse than it sounds.
608
00:20:01,000 --> 00:20:02,835
There was
a jazz brunch involved.
609
00:20:02,869 --> 00:20:04,070
- Oh.
- Oh, my God.
610
00:20:04,103 --> 00:20:06,973
Look, all we can do is hope
that Sergeant Wells handles this
611
00:20:07,006 --> 00:20:09,842
like a professional and respects
the uniform that we all wear.
612
00:20:11,043 --> 00:20:12,912
Hey, everybody, look who's here.
613
00:20:12,945 --> 00:20:15,615
It's me, the most boring man
in America.
614
00:20:15,648 --> 00:20:17,760
Well, to be the most anything
in America is pretty good.
615
00:20:17,784 --> 00:20:18,918
I mean, it's a big country.
616
00:20:18,951 --> 00:20:21,621
- Teddy, we are so sorry.
- No, you don't have to be.
617
00:20:21,654 --> 00:20:22,755
It's okay. I get it.
618
00:20:22,789 --> 00:20:24,591
I am boring. I'm owning it now.
619
00:20:24,624 --> 00:20:25,768
Sergeant Wells, I understand
620
00:20:25,792 --> 00:20:27,303
that you're upset
for personal reasons,
621
00:20:27,327 --> 00:20:29,962
but we're hoping that you'll
give us a fair evaluation.
622
00:20:29,996 --> 00:20:30,830
I will not...
623
00:20:30,863 --> 00:20:32,865
'cause I'm not gonna
write one at all.
624
00:20:32,899 --> 00:20:34,000
I'm recusing myself.
625
00:20:34,033 --> 00:20:36,936
Oh. That is so sweet.
626
00:20:36,969 --> 00:20:38,905
Thank you for being
such a good guy, Teddy.
627
00:20:38,938 --> 00:20:42,008
Okay. I can read between
the lines, and I love you, too.
628
00:20:42,041 --> 00:20:43,710
Amy Santiago, will you...
629
00:20:43,743 --> 00:20:45,278
- No! Get up!
- Come on!
630
00:20:45,312 --> 00:20:48,014
Well, for what it's worth,
your precinct is immaculate.
631
00:20:48,047 --> 00:20:50,883
I'm sure that your new auditor,
Lieutenant Hopkins,
632
00:20:50,917 --> 00:20:52,285
will be very impressed.
633
00:20:52,319 --> 00:20:54,854
- Veronica Hopkins?
- That's the one.
634
00:20:54,887 --> 00:20:57,023
Well, the good news is,
635
00:20:57,056 --> 00:20:58,358
Amy has not dated her.
636
00:20:58,391 --> 00:21:01,394
No, but I did, and she hates me.
637
00:21:01,428 --> 00:21:03,763
Why can't any of you keep it
in your pants?
638
00:21:03,796 --> 00:21:05,365
Hello, Nine-Nine.
639
00:21:05,398 --> 00:21:07,367
I'm Lieutenant Hopkins.
640
00:21:07,400 --> 00:21:09,035
Hello, Terry Jeffords.
641
00:21:09,068 --> 00:21:11,371
Come here
and give an old friend a hug.
642
00:21:11,404 --> 00:21:14,341
Hey. So good to see you.
643
00:21:15,808 --> 00:21:17,344
I'm shutting the Nine-Nine down,
644
00:21:17,377 --> 00:21:19,912
and there is nothing
you can do about it.
645
00:21:19,946 --> 00:21:23,049
Oh!
646
00:21:23,082 --> 00:21:25,918
This place is fantastic.
647
00:21:25,952 --> 00:21:28,054
This is gonna be fun.
648
00:21:30,089 --> 00:21:31,090
She seems nice.
649
00:21:31,123 --> 00:21:33,292
- Not a doctor.
- Shh.
48860
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