Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:00,001 --> 00:00:03,701
(funky disco plays)
♪ My name is Cleveland Brown
2
00:00:03,704 --> 00:00:06,014
♪ And I am proud to be
3
00:00:06,007 --> 00:00:08,137
♪ Right back in my hometown
4
00:00:08,142 --> 00:00:11,942
♪ With my new family
5
00:00:11,946 --> 00:00:14,206
♪ There's old friends
and new friends ♪
6
00:00:14,215 --> 00:00:16,475
♪ And even a bear
7
00:00:16,484 --> 00:00:18,584
♪ Through good times
and bad times ♪
8
00:00:18,586 --> 00:00:19,986
♪ It's true love we share
9
00:00:19,987 --> 00:00:22,117
♪ And so I found a place
10
00:00:22,123 --> 00:00:24,863
♪ Where everyone will know
11
00:00:24,859 --> 00:00:26,859
♪ My happy mustached face
12
00:00:26,861 --> 00:00:28,991
♪ This is The Cleveland Show. ♪
13
00:00:28,996 --> 00:00:30,826
(chuckles)
14
00:00:30,831 --> 00:00:33,471
Captioning sponsored by
20th CENTURY FOX TELEVISION
15
00:00:33,467 --> 00:00:34,627
Hey, beloved family,
16
00:00:34,635 --> 00:00:36,195
who I called five minutes ago
17
00:00:36,203 --> 00:00:38,843
asking you to wait,
but now you're eating.
18
00:00:38,839 --> 00:00:39,869
No matter,
19
00:00:39,874 --> 00:00:42,314
for I am happy
because I got these.
20
00:00:42,309 --> 00:00:45,109
Our tickets for the
Commodores Gold Record
21
00:00:45,112 --> 00:00:48,112
and All-You-Can-Eat
Jumbo Shrimps Cruise!
22
00:00:48,115 --> 00:00:49,305
All you can eat?
23
00:00:49,316 --> 00:00:51,176
Dyn-o-mite!
24
00:00:51,185 --> 00:00:54,485
That's right, I'm gonna dine
with all my might.
25
00:00:54,488 --> 00:00:55,488
RALLO: Ha!
26
00:00:55,489 --> 00:00:56,819
What up, black people?
27
00:00:56,824 --> 00:00:58,324
These threads ain't
about the cruise.
28
00:00:58,325 --> 00:01:00,925
I'm filling in for the
Sandman at The Apollo.
29
00:01:00,928 --> 00:01:03,028
But the Commodores,
30
00:01:03,030 --> 00:01:05,160
those cats are
outta sight!
31
00:01:05,166 --> 00:01:06,466
You dig?
32
00:01:06,467 --> 00:01:07,827
Is everyone in
this family
33
00:01:07,835 --> 00:01:09,495
stuck in the '70s?
34
00:01:09,503 --> 00:01:12,003
Can any of you name a
single current rapper?
35
00:01:12,006 --> 00:01:13,166
What's a rapper?
36
00:01:13,174 --> 00:01:15,774
Oh, Cleveland, you arestuck in the '70s.
37
00:01:15,776 --> 00:01:18,036
They're the guys who wear
the gold chains and go,
38
00:01:18,045 --> 00:01:19,975
"Wibbity-bop,
flibbity-blop."
39
00:01:19,980 --> 00:01:21,850
Oh-ho, Donna,
that is fresh.
40
00:01:21,849 --> 00:01:23,919
Let's have some
more of that!
41
00:01:23,918 --> 00:01:25,348
♪ Hootie-hop, hootie-hoo!
42
00:01:25,352 --> 00:01:26,952
♪ And a wop-a-doodle-doo!
♪ Scratch, scratch, scratch.
43
00:01:26,954 --> 00:01:29,124
♪ Don't give
me no jive. ♪ ♪ Uh-huh, uh-huh
44
00:01:29,123 --> 00:01:30,293
♪ Who bad?
♪ I'm bad.
45
00:01:30,291 --> 00:01:31,791
♪ Her bad, mmm.
♪ I'm bad.
46
00:01:31,792 --> 00:01:33,862
Well, if we're going
on a '70s cruise,
47
00:01:33,861 --> 00:01:36,301
I'm gonna go
get un-waxed.
48
00:01:36,297 --> 00:01:38,857
Oh, Cleveland, this
cruise is gonna be fun.
49
00:01:38,866 --> 00:01:41,866
But are you sure
week off from work?
50
00:01:41,869 --> 00:01:42,869
Of course I can.
51
00:01:42,870 --> 00:01:45,370
Everybody gets off
for spring break.
52
00:01:45,372 --> 00:01:46,972
Flip to...
53
00:01:46,974 --> 00:01:49,484
Adults don't get spring break.
54
00:01:49,477 --> 00:01:52,607
Besides, you've already
taken 132 vacation days
55
00:01:52,613 --> 00:01:54,213
since you started here.
56
00:01:54,215 --> 00:01:56,945
I did? What about sick days?
57
00:01:56,951 --> 00:01:57,681
None left.
58
00:01:57,685 --> 00:01:58,915
Bereavement?
59
00:01:58,919 --> 00:02:00,919
If it's your immediate family.
60
00:02:00,921 --> 00:02:03,261
Do you know how many
children I have? No.
61
00:02:03,257 --> 00:02:05,857
The quintuplets
have died.
62
00:02:05,860 --> 00:02:08,830
How?
God told me to drown them.
63
00:02:08,829 --> 00:02:10,329
Get out of my office.
64
00:02:10,331 --> 00:02:11,601
(groans)
65
00:02:13,166 --> 00:02:14,796
Hey, I won!
66
00:02:14,802 --> 00:02:16,502
Oh, $5,000?
67
00:02:16,504 --> 00:02:18,974
That's not enough
to quit my job.
68
00:02:18,973 --> 00:02:20,943
Stupid, dumb lottery!
69
00:02:20,941 --> 00:02:21,971
(starts engine)
70
00:02:21,976 --> 00:02:24,806
(tires squealing)
71
00:02:24,812 --> 00:02:26,982
I wish I worked
for Cox Cable.
72
00:02:26,981 --> 00:02:29,011
With their long
Cox vacations,
73
00:02:29,016 --> 00:02:31,576
huge Cox vans,
74
00:02:31,585 --> 00:02:33,985
their delicious,
barely-fit-your-mouth-around-it
75
00:02:33,988 --> 00:02:35,248
Cox muffins...
76
00:02:35,256 --> 00:02:37,856
Hey! No one loves
Cox more than I do,
77
00:02:37,858 --> 00:02:40,828
but talking about it
isn't gonna get you off.
78
00:02:40,828 --> 00:02:42,858
Oh, if only there
were enough weekends
79
00:02:42,863 --> 00:02:44,203
between now
and the cruise,
80
00:02:44,198 --> 00:02:46,368
I could make up the
hours ahead of time.
81
00:02:46,367 --> 00:02:49,027
Wait a minute,
you could just work 40 hours straight.
82
00:02:49,036 --> 00:02:52,036
There's no rule says
when you have to get your work done.
83
00:02:53,206 --> 00:02:55,266
Like, just keep working
around the clock?
84
00:02:55,276 --> 00:02:57,836
Terry, that idea is--
85
00:02:57,845 --> 00:02:59,205
what do the gays
say for "good?"
86
00:02:59,213 --> 00:03:01,983
Delicious?!
No. We say "good."
87
00:03:01,982 --> 00:03:04,182
Hmm. I like
"delicious."
88
00:03:04,185 --> 00:03:06,685
CLEVELAND (high-pitched):
Bye...!
89
00:03:09,622 --> 00:03:12,962
Funny, a black couple,
but a Chinese-smelling house.
90
00:03:12,960 --> 00:03:14,990
Must be in the walls.
91
00:03:14,995 --> 00:03:16,995
14 hours down,
92
00:03:16,997 --> 00:03:19,027
26 to go.
93
00:03:26,272 --> 00:03:28,342
♪
94
00:03:46,826 --> 00:03:51,196
♪ I've been hooking up
some cable ♪
95
00:03:51,198 --> 00:03:54,268
♪ All the live-long...
96
00:03:55,835 --> 00:03:57,195
♪ ...day!
97
00:03:57,204 --> 00:03:59,444
Hmm. Maybe there's
something on the radio
98
00:03:59,440 --> 00:04:01,170
that will keep me awake.
99
00:04:01,175 --> 00:04:03,935
MALE DEEJAY:
Welcome to The Quiet Storm.
100
00:04:03,944 --> 00:04:07,054
Sit back, relax,
close your eyes,
101
00:04:07,047 --> 00:04:09,277
and let us drive for you.
102
00:04:09,283 --> 00:04:11,953
Mmm. That sounds nice.
103
00:04:11,952 --> 00:04:14,352
Look out for that truck.
104
00:04:14,355 --> 00:04:15,985
Ah! Truck!
105
00:04:15,990 --> 00:04:17,020
(truck's horn blows)
106
00:04:17,024 --> 00:04:19,294
Maybe something
a little more upbeat.
107
00:04:19,293 --> 00:04:21,933
MAN: Let's talk sports.
There you go!
108
00:04:21,929 --> 00:04:23,029
Women's sports!
109
00:04:23,030 --> 00:04:24,830
More specifically,
women's collegiate hurdles.
110
00:04:24,832 --> 00:04:26,932
Let's break in on the action.
111
00:04:26,934 --> 00:04:30,044
(running steps, kicking hurdles,
panting, grunting)
112
00:04:30,037 --> 00:04:31,637
No.
113
00:04:31,639 --> 00:04:34,509
MALE DEEJAY 2: We count down
your 1,000 favorite numbers.
114
00:04:34,508 --> 00:04:37,138
At number 1,000: 1,000!
115
00:04:37,144 --> 00:04:40,784
Number 999: 26.
116
00:04:40,781 --> 00:04:42,881
MALE DEEJAY 3:
Now here's Norah Jones.
117
00:04:42,883 --> 00:04:44,153
Uh-uh!
118
00:04:44,151 --> 00:04:46,291
FEMALE HOST (sensually):
You're listening to Sexy Talk
119
00:04:46,287 --> 00:04:48,117
with two aging porn stars.
120
00:04:48,122 --> 00:04:49,862
Let's take a call.
121
00:04:49,857 --> 00:04:52,187
We've got Holt on line one.
122
00:04:52,192 --> 00:04:53,492
HOLT: Yeah, am I on?
123
00:04:53,494 --> 00:04:54,964
I'm six-five.
124
00:04:54,962 --> 00:04:56,262
I'm really good at sex.
125
00:04:56,263 --> 00:04:59,033
FEMALE HOST:
Ooh. You sound like my uncle.
126
00:04:59,033 --> 00:05:00,373
What's your question?
127
00:05:00,367 --> 00:05:02,427
HOLT: Can you say,
"Holt, you're really good"?
128
00:05:02,436 --> 00:05:04,666
FEMALE HOST:
Holt, you're really good.
129
00:05:04,672 --> 00:05:06,372
HOLT: Boom! Ringtone.
130
00:05:06,373 --> 00:05:08,513
NEWSMAN: We have breaking news
where a farmer
131
00:05:08,509 --> 00:05:09,809
apparently lost all his sheep.
132
00:05:09,810 --> 00:05:12,010
We're live on the scene
talking to a witness.
133
00:05:12,012 --> 00:05:13,352
Tell us what you saw, sir.
134
00:05:13,347 --> 00:05:15,847
MAN: Well, I saw one sheep
jump over the fence.
135
00:05:15,849 --> 00:05:17,679
And then two sheep.
136
00:05:17,685 --> 00:05:19,175
Three sheep.
137
00:05:19,186 --> 00:05:20,816
Four sheep.
138
00:05:20,821 --> 00:05:22,521
Five sheep.
139
00:05:22,523 --> 00:05:24,423
Six sheep.
(horn honking)
140
00:05:24,425 --> 00:05:27,025
FEMALE HOST 2: We have Gwyneth
Paltrow talking down to us
141
00:05:27,027 --> 00:05:29,827
about acting and parenting.
142
00:05:29,830 --> 00:05:30,930
I can do this.
143
00:05:30,931 --> 00:05:32,931
All I need's
another capof coffee.
144
00:05:32,933 --> 00:05:36,443
I don't know why people
say staying up all night
145
00:05:36,437 --> 00:05:38,097
messes with your mind.
146
00:05:38,105 --> 00:05:40,665
What do you think
Donnie Darko rabbit?
147
00:05:40,674 --> 00:05:42,214
(goofy voice):
I don't know.
148
00:05:42,209 --> 00:05:43,839
That's how you talk?!
149
00:05:43,844 --> 00:05:45,884
Yes...!
150
00:05:45,879 --> 00:05:47,949
You're creative.
151
00:05:50,183 --> 00:05:52,583
Sir? Sir?!
152
00:05:52,586 --> 00:05:54,916
Wha...? Oh, sorry.
153
00:05:54,922 --> 00:05:58,022
Give me your driest
frankfurter on there.
154
00:05:58,958 --> 00:06:01,328
(loud slapping)
155
00:06:03,029 --> 00:06:04,929
Thank you.
156
00:06:06,466 --> 00:06:07,926
Hey, pimples,
what's the skinny
157
00:06:07,935 --> 00:06:09,465
on those Mega Energy Pills?
158
00:06:09,470 --> 00:06:11,140
They're ,like, you know,
caffeine or something.
159
00:06:11,138 --> 00:06:13,768
Truckers take them so they
can stay up all night.
160
00:06:13,774 --> 00:06:15,274
Truckers are so cool!
161
00:06:15,275 --> 00:06:17,205
Breaker, breaker one-nine.
162
00:06:17,211 --> 00:06:19,541
I got a Smokey on
my tail, ten-four?
163
00:06:19,546 --> 00:06:21,206
Hey-hey, that's
pretty good.
164
00:06:21,215 --> 00:06:23,175
I don't have time
for your nonsense!
165
00:06:23,183 --> 00:06:24,923
Let me try one of those.
166
00:06:24,918 --> 00:06:27,018
(gulp)
167
00:06:27,020 --> 00:06:28,820
MAN (distorted):
I'm disappointed in you, C-Cup.
168
00:06:28,822 --> 00:06:31,262
MAN 2:
Thanks for keeping it warmfor me, doughboy.
169
00:06:31,258 --> 00:06:33,488
MAN 3:
Mr. and Mrs. Cleveland Brown!
170
00:06:33,494 --> 00:06:35,994
CLEVELAND:
No, no, no, no, no, no!
171
00:06:35,996 --> 00:06:37,526
(echoing boom)
172
00:06:37,531 --> 00:06:38,961
Wow!
173
00:06:38,966 --> 00:06:41,896
I'll take an ass-load
of those pills, please.
174
00:06:44,504 --> 00:06:46,944
Donna, I need a
change of clothes and then...
175
00:06:46,940 --> 00:06:49,040
Robert? What are
you doing here?
176
00:06:49,042 --> 00:06:50,042
Eating turkey bacon.
177
00:06:50,043 --> 00:06:51,843
You've been gone
for two days,
178
00:06:51,845 --> 00:06:53,505
and these children
need a father.
179
00:06:53,514 --> 00:06:55,184
I've been working
for two days!
180
00:06:55,182 --> 00:06:57,422
Feels like two hours
with these pills.
181
00:06:57,418 --> 00:06:59,648
I'm talking 'bout
installing some cable!
182
00:06:59,653 --> 00:07:01,353
Everybody watchin' now!
183
00:07:01,355 --> 00:07:03,415
(gulps, giggles)
184
00:07:03,424 --> 00:07:04,824
All right, then.
185
00:07:04,825 --> 00:07:07,155
Hey, Junior, it was fun
speaking to your class.
186
00:07:07,161 --> 00:07:09,631
Thanks for teaching us
how to light a cigarette
187
00:07:09,630 --> 00:07:10,930
on the stove top.
188
00:07:10,931 --> 00:07:12,361
Yeah. And when
you're 15,
189
00:07:12,366 --> 00:07:15,626
I'll teach you how to roll
your own. Wink, wink.
190
00:07:15,636 --> 00:07:18,366
Cleveland, you've worked enough
to go on the cruise. (goofy grunting)
191
00:07:18,372 --> 00:07:21,712
Now it's time to put those pills
away and get some rest. Nuh-uh!
192
00:07:21,708 --> 00:07:23,478
There's still days
before this cruise.
193
00:07:23,477 --> 00:07:25,207
I can keep working
and have weeks,
194
00:07:25,212 --> 00:07:26,952
maybe even months off!
195
00:07:26,947 --> 00:07:27,877
Months!
196
00:07:27,881 --> 00:07:29,881
Do you know how
long a month is?
197
00:07:29,883 --> 00:07:31,823
I'm asking you a
question, Donna!
198
00:07:31,819 --> 00:07:33,989
Ah, forget it!
The pills will tell me.
199
00:07:33,987 --> 00:07:35,787
(crazy laughter)
200
00:07:35,789 --> 00:07:38,089
That man's a mess.
201
00:07:38,991 --> 00:07:40,291
Howdy, howdy, howdy,
202
00:07:40,294 --> 00:07:41,664
howdy, howdy,
howdy, howdy!
203
00:07:41,662 --> 00:07:42,662
Let's see. Hmm.
204
00:07:42,662 --> 00:07:48,002
How many Mega Energy
Pills can I get for... this? (grunts)
205
00:07:48,001 --> 00:07:50,541
This says: "Happy birthday,
Rallo, from Grandma."
206
00:07:50,537 --> 00:07:53,507
(grunts)
And this is a Post-it note that says: "One hundred dollars."
207
00:07:53,507 --> 00:07:55,107
Is it hot?
It's hot in here.
208
00:07:55,108 --> 00:07:56,478
Are you hot? I'm hot.
209
00:07:56,477 --> 00:07:59,177
Guy back there taking a long
time with them pills, huh?!
210
00:07:59,179 --> 00:08:00,779
Sorry, sir.
211
00:08:00,781 --> 00:08:03,981
I've been instructed
not to sell you any more.
212
00:08:03,984 --> 00:08:06,454
What?!
You're demonstrating addictive behavior.
213
00:08:06,453 --> 00:08:09,453
You seem like a
nice person; I hope you get help.
214
00:08:09,456 --> 00:08:12,416
No! You go to hell,
zit-face!
215
00:08:12,426 --> 00:08:13,456
(sobbing)
216
00:08:13,460 --> 00:08:15,730
(stops sobbing, clears throat)
217
00:08:17,129 --> 00:08:21,029
Hey, you guys want
to make a quick buck?
218
00:08:21,034 --> 00:08:23,304
Uh, is it gay stuff?
219
00:08:23,303 --> 00:08:25,143
Do you need it to be?
No.
220
00:08:25,138 --> 00:08:28,008
Good. I didn't want
to have to make that decision.
221
00:08:28,008 --> 00:08:29,808
Here, take this money
and buy me...
222
00:08:29,810 --> 00:08:31,510
CLERK: Sir, if you
don't go away,
223
00:08:31,512 --> 00:08:33,982
I'll have to
call the police.
224
00:08:33,981 --> 00:08:36,551
(grunting)
225
00:08:36,550 --> 00:08:38,080
(window crackles)
226
00:08:39,452 --> 00:08:40,852
Good-bye, Debbie.
227
00:08:40,854 --> 00:08:43,924
I guess we'll never get
to have ugly children together.
228
00:08:44,924 --> 00:08:45,924
(grunts)
229
00:08:45,926 --> 00:08:49,256
(maniacal laughter)
230
00:08:50,963 --> 00:08:52,303
You checking me out?
231
00:08:52,299 --> 00:08:54,029
Well, too late.
232
00:08:54,034 --> 00:08:56,304
You can't have
none of this!
233
00:08:56,303 --> 00:08:58,873
And I would've done
anything. Anything!
234
00:08:58,872 --> 00:09:00,942
(maniacal laughter)
235
00:09:06,112 --> 00:09:07,852
Oh, thank goodness.
236
00:09:07,848 --> 00:09:09,808
I had the strangest dream.
237
00:09:09,816 --> 00:09:13,146
I dreamt I was addicted
to energy pills.
238
00:09:13,153 --> 00:09:16,863
Hmm. I seem to have been
accidentally tied to the bed.
239
00:09:16,857 --> 00:09:18,857
We had to protect
you from yourself.
240
00:09:18,859 --> 00:09:20,629
Your dream was real.
241
00:09:20,627 --> 00:09:22,127
Was it? Hey,
242
00:09:22,129 --> 00:09:24,199
give me my pills
out of my jacket.
243
00:09:24,197 --> 00:09:25,997
You're not
having any pills.
244
00:09:25,999 --> 00:09:27,099
You're an addict!
245
00:09:27,100 --> 00:09:28,930
Donna, I'm not an addict.
246
00:09:28,936 --> 00:09:31,536
Now, if you wouldn't mind
reaching into my anus
247
00:09:31,538 --> 00:09:33,338
and fetching me
my private reserve.
248
00:09:33,340 --> 00:09:34,470
Ain't happening, Brown.
249
00:09:34,474 --> 00:09:35,844
We're having
an intervention.
250
00:09:35,842 --> 00:09:39,612
Yeah? You and what army
of family and nosy neighbors?
251
00:09:39,613 --> 00:09:40,983
LESTER: Us.
252
00:09:40,981 --> 00:09:42,511
Oh.
253
00:09:42,516 --> 00:09:43,946
What's up, Arianna?
254
00:09:43,951 --> 00:09:48,091
(whispers): Would you reach
into my anus for me?
255
00:09:51,657 --> 00:09:53,757
I'm sorry
it's come to this.
256
00:09:53,760 --> 00:09:55,430
You're going to rehab.
257
00:09:55,429 --> 00:09:58,799
♪ I say no, no, no.
258
00:09:58,799 --> 00:10:00,529
Winehouse. Dead. Sad.
259
00:10:00,534 --> 00:10:02,374
Didn't see it coming. Did.
260
00:10:02,369 --> 00:10:03,999
Cleveland, we
want you better.
261
00:10:04,004 --> 00:10:06,844
And we'll be here for you
when you get out of rehab.
262
00:10:06,840 --> 00:10:09,770
B-But I won't
know anyone there.
263
00:10:09,776 --> 00:10:10,836
You know what?
264
00:10:10,844 --> 00:10:12,184
I think it'd be a good idea
265
00:10:12,179 --> 00:10:14,349
if Tim dried
out a bit. (slurping, belches)
266
00:10:14,348 --> 00:10:15,978
And Lester, too.
267
00:10:15,983 --> 00:10:17,953
He's an alcoholic.
268
00:10:17,951 --> 00:10:20,691
I'm just addicted to
seeing you pretty.
269
00:10:20,687 --> 00:10:23,017
(hiccups)
Oh, Lester!
270
00:10:23,023 --> 00:10:25,023
I'd better go, too.
I'm a sex addict.
271
00:10:25,025 --> 00:10:26,385
Carpal tunnel.
272
00:10:28,995 --> 00:10:29,925
(crying)
273
00:10:29,930 --> 00:10:31,830
Oh, this is so embarrassing.
274
00:10:31,832 --> 00:10:34,002
We're all wearing
the same smocks!
275
00:10:34,001 --> 00:10:35,331
We don't belong here.
276
00:10:35,335 --> 00:10:37,135
I mean,
look at all these weirdoes .
277
00:10:37,137 --> 00:10:39,497
I sold my penis for meth.
278
00:10:39,506 --> 00:10:41,966
I got drunk and had sex
with my boss's car.
279
00:10:41,975 --> 00:10:44,035
I huff propane.
280
00:10:44,044 --> 00:10:46,854
And the worst part is,
I only took those pills
281
00:10:46,847 --> 00:10:49,607
so I could go
on that Commodores Gold Record
282
00:10:49,616 --> 00:10:52,016
and All-You-Can-Eat
Jumbo Shrimps Cruise.
283
00:10:52,019 --> 00:10:53,989
And now I can't go.
284
00:10:53,987 --> 00:10:55,417
Just don't think
about it, C-bro.
285
00:10:55,422 --> 00:10:57,692
Kind of tough not
to think about it.
286
00:11:01,494 --> 00:11:02,864
Hey, what're you
guys looking at?
287
00:11:02,863 --> 00:11:04,933
No, Shrimpy Dave,
don't look!
288
00:11:04,931 --> 00:11:06,031
Is that shrimp?
289
00:11:06,033 --> 00:11:08,273
I'm off the wagon!
290
00:11:08,268 --> 00:11:09,428
Ew.
291
00:11:09,436 --> 00:11:10,996
I thought he'd be eating it.
292
00:11:11,004 --> 00:11:13,274
Lord, help Shrimpy Dave.
293
00:11:15,875 --> 00:11:16,975
(slaps)
Ow!
294
00:11:16,977 --> 00:11:18,507
Ha-ha! Boom!
295
00:11:18,512 --> 00:11:19,842
You suck!
296
00:11:19,846 --> 00:11:21,976
Yeah, this is better
than a cruise.
297
00:11:21,982 --> 00:11:23,622
I know
you're disappointed,
298
00:11:23,617 --> 00:11:26,317
but we should be here
in case Cleveland needs us.
299
00:11:26,319 --> 00:11:28,849
Even though our bags
are already packed
300
00:11:28,855 --> 00:11:32,655
and our non-refundable tickets
are right there.
301
00:11:32,659 --> 00:11:34,929
And that taxi's waiting outside.
302
00:11:34,928 --> 00:11:36,998
(honking)
'Ey!
303
00:11:36,997 --> 00:11:39,427
You vashlooorder a cab?
304
00:11:39,433 --> 00:11:42,003
Well, we could just take a ride
in the cab with our bags,
305
00:11:42,002 --> 00:11:43,472
see where it goes.
306
00:11:43,470 --> 00:11:46,870
We at least owe it to our bags
to put them in the cab.
307
00:11:46,873 --> 00:11:48,173
Screw it, let's go.
308
00:11:50,776 --> 00:11:53,036
I guess everything I do
is for him,
309
00:11:53,046 --> 00:11:55,676
just to hear him say,
"I'm proud of you."
310
00:11:55,682 --> 00:11:56,852
Your father?
311
00:11:56,850 --> 00:11:58,580
No, Bradley Cooper.
312
00:11:58,585 --> 00:12:00,085
Well, we've made some progress.
313
00:12:00,087 --> 00:12:01,817
You guys are out of your minds.
314
00:12:01,822 --> 00:12:03,122
I'm going to take a shower.
315
00:12:03,123 --> 00:12:04,423
Anybody want to take a shower?
316
00:12:04,424 --> 00:12:06,694
All right.
I do.
317
00:12:06,693 --> 00:12:07,963
This is ridiculous.
318
00:12:07,961 --> 00:12:08,931
I don't belong here.
319
00:12:08,929 --> 00:12:10,159
(ship's horn blares)
320
00:12:11,530 --> 00:12:13,430
I belong on that cruise!
321
00:12:13,433 --> 00:12:14,833
We're getting out of here.
322
00:12:14,835 --> 00:12:16,795
And here's how...
323
00:12:16,803 --> 00:12:20,143
CLEVELAND: The orderlies' shiftchange is at 12:32 exactly.
324
00:12:20,140 --> 00:12:22,510
Tim, that's when you'll hackinto the mainframe,
325
00:12:22,509 --> 00:12:24,179
disabling the security cameras.
326
00:12:25,344 --> 00:12:26,444
(cracks knuckles)
327
00:12:26,446 --> 00:12:27,506
(roars)
328
00:12:28,447 --> 00:12:29,647
That will allow me
329
00:12:29,649 --> 00:12:32,119
to climb up into the air ducts.
330
00:12:36,789 --> 00:12:38,919
(whistles)
331
00:12:38,925 --> 00:12:40,625
Holt, this is
where you come in.
332
00:12:40,627 --> 00:12:41,957
You're gonna create
a diversion.
333
00:12:41,962 --> 00:12:43,192
Can I do Church Lady?
334
00:12:43,196 --> 00:12:45,026
Don't care.
I'm gonna do Church Lady.
335
00:12:45,031 --> 00:12:46,871
Isn't that special?
336
00:12:46,867 --> 00:12:50,097
(organ music plays)
337
00:12:50,103 --> 00:12:54,213
That will allow me to dropinto Lester's laundry cart,
338
00:12:54,207 --> 00:12:56,877
and then we'll all rendezvousat the nurses' desk,
339
00:12:56,877 --> 00:13:00,507
where we'll sign out becausethis is a voluntary facility,
340
00:13:00,514 --> 00:13:02,854
and we can leaveany time we want.
341
00:13:02,849 --> 00:13:03,979
See you later, Mr. Brown.
342
00:13:03,984 --> 00:13:05,154
Or not.
343
00:13:05,152 --> 00:13:06,582
Totally up to you.
344
00:13:06,586 --> 00:13:07,986
Sorry, Cleve-bro.
345
00:13:07,988 --> 00:13:09,688
We're staying.
What?
346
00:13:09,689 --> 00:13:11,789
We're making
some real progress.
347
00:13:11,792 --> 00:13:13,532
Okay.
348
00:13:14,293 --> 00:13:15,833
(panting)
349
00:13:15,829 --> 00:13:16,929
(ship's horn blares)
350
00:13:16,930 --> 00:13:19,530
Dirty-Rassen-frassenpercalumin
351
00:13:19,533 --> 00:13:20,973
chabadamin-back-rackalacka!
352
00:13:20,967 --> 00:13:22,997
Ooh, a Jet Ski!
353
00:13:41,420 --> 00:13:43,420
Spring break!
354
00:13:43,423 --> 00:13:45,423
Cleve gone wild!
355
00:13:45,425 --> 00:13:46,415
Ahh!
356
00:13:46,426 --> 00:13:47,986
(ship's horn blares)
357
00:13:55,768 --> 00:13:57,338
Aw, hell!
358
00:13:57,337 --> 00:13:59,497
I keep waking up handcuffed.
359
00:13:59,506 --> 00:14:02,006
I feel like Hugh Jackman's
cabaña boy.
360
00:14:02,008 --> 00:14:03,678
You should be so lucky.
361
00:14:03,677 --> 00:14:06,637
You were pulled from the
water by Somali pirates.
362
00:14:06,646 --> 00:14:09,176
And they kill everyone
who isn't of use to them,
363
00:14:09,182 --> 00:14:11,822
(voice cracking):
including... my poor wife.
364
00:14:11,818 --> 00:14:13,018
(creaky door opens)
365
00:14:13,019 --> 00:14:14,289
Oh, hi.
366
00:14:14,287 --> 00:14:15,417
I need to switch rooms.
367
00:14:15,422 --> 00:14:16,752
This guy is bumming me out.
368
00:14:16,756 --> 00:14:18,786
I don't know if you have
any singles open or...
369
00:14:18,792 --> 00:14:19,962
Silence!
370
00:14:19,960 --> 00:14:23,060
Now that we have you, we don't
need this frail, old man.
371
00:14:23,929 --> 00:14:25,659
Well, that was
a stupid move.
372
00:14:25,665 --> 00:14:27,425
You're all under arrest.
373
00:14:27,434 --> 00:14:29,534
(dramatically): For murder!
374
00:14:31,871 --> 00:14:33,501
(surf rolling)
375
00:14:34,440 --> 00:14:37,440
Aw, this soaks deck.
376
00:14:37,444 --> 00:14:38,614
Hey there, Chief.
377
00:14:38,612 --> 00:14:40,282
You mind if I pick up
here tomorrow?
378
00:14:40,280 --> 00:14:41,810
Say between 1:00 and 4:00?
379
00:14:41,815 --> 00:14:43,445
See, I'm a cable installer...
380
00:14:43,450 --> 00:14:45,580
Good, because our
cable is out.
381
00:14:45,585 --> 00:14:47,015
We missed the last Mad Men.
382
00:14:47,020 --> 00:14:48,850
You will fix our cable.
383
00:14:48,855 --> 00:14:50,115
Oh, this will be easy.
384
00:14:50,123 --> 00:14:51,163
Good luck.
385
00:14:51,157 --> 00:14:52,357
We've tried everything.
386
00:14:52,359 --> 00:14:54,859
Oh, so pirates couldn't
fix their cable?
387
00:14:54,861 --> 00:14:56,091
That's right.
388
00:14:56,096 --> 00:14:58,656
Exactly, so let me do
what I do.
389
00:14:59,632 --> 00:15:02,072
Caw! Caw!
390
00:15:03,469 --> 00:15:04,539
PIRATE: It is working!
391
00:15:04,537 --> 00:15:05,537
Mad Men is on.
392
00:15:05,538 --> 00:15:06,768
There's Pete Campbell.
393
00:15:06,773 --> 00:15:09,213
Ooh, that Pete Campbell
is a weasel.
394
00:15:09,209 --> 00:15:10,379
Isn't he?
395
00:15:10,377 --> 00:15:11,977
Yes, he is;
I can't stand him.
396
00:15:11,978 --> 00:15:13,008
Can't you?
397
00:15:13,013 --> 00:15:14,853
Ugh, now I want
to kill you again.
398
00:15:14,848 --> 00:15:16,918
Do you?
Ahh!
399
00:15:16,917 --> 00:15:18,817
♪ Brick house...
400
00:15:18,818 --> 00:15:20,518
The Commodores Gold Record
401
00:15:20,520 --> 00:15:22,490
and All-You-Can-Eat
Jumbo Shrimps Cruise!
402
00:15:22,489 --> 00:15:23,689
Our next target.
403
00:15:23,690 --> 00:15:25,420
We are going to kill
everyone on board
404
00:15:25,425 --> 00:15:27,485
and steal the gold records.
405
00:15:28,661 --> 00:15:30,161
(Cleveland whistles)
406
00:15:30,163 --> 00:15:31,803
Wow.
407
00:15:31,798 --> 00:15:34,098
It's the Commodores!
408
00:15:34,100 --> 00:15:36,970
Ooh, I bet it won't
take much to murder them.
409
00:15:36,970 --> 00:15:38,470
And there's Donna...
410
00:15:38,471 --> 00:15:39,801
Roberta...
411
00:15:39,806 --> 00:15:40,966
Junior...
412
00:15:40,974 --> 00:15:42,874
I bet Rallo's next.
Yep, called it.
413
00:15:42,876 --> 00:15:45,776
(gasps) Donna, Roberta,
Junior and Rallo?
414
00:15:45,779 --> 00:15:46,839
They went without me?
415
00:15:46,846 --> 00:15:49,446
Oh, which hurts,
416
00:15:49,449 --> 00:15:52,679
but I should save them,
which will require swimming.
417
00:15:52,686 --> 00:15:57,586
Hmm, just had those saltines and
cottage cheese 20 minutes ago.
418
00:15:57,590 --> 00:16:02,690
So, in ten more minutes,
I should be G-2-G.
419
00:16:04,863 --> 00:16:08,003
I met the nicest couple
from Baltimore.
420
00:16:08,001 --> 00:16:09,331
They said their
neighbor's granddaughter
421
00:16:09,336 --> 00:16:10,936
would be perfect for me.
422
00:16:10,937 --> 00:16:13,097
You think that's code
for fat or black?
423
00:16:13,106 --> 00:16:14,306
Probably both.
424
00:16:14,307 --> 00:16:15,337
Cool!
425
00:16:15,342 --> 00:16:17,142
I like fat black girls.
426
00:16:17,143 --> 00:16:20,813
I can't believe this cruise
doesn't have cocktail sauce.
427
00:16:20,814 --> 00:16:23,214
Finish your breakfast,
Rallo!
428
00:16:23,216 --> 00:16:24,416
Hey, Junior.
429
00:16:24,417 --> 00:16:25,677
Huh?
430
00:16:27,653 --> 00:16:30,763
All right, pirates, in one hour
we board the cruise ship
431
00:16:30,757 --> 00:16:32,357
to rape, pillage and plunder.
432
00:16:32,359 --> 00:16:33,959
PIRATES: Yay!
433
00:16:33,960 --> 00:16:36,330
And maybe this time,
a little less raping.
434
00:16:36,329 --> 00:16:39,499
I think with the last boat, we
all got a wee bit carried away.
435
00:16:39,499 --> 00:16:41,769
We're better than that,
you guys.
436
00:16:51,844 --> 00:16:53,814
I never thought I'd say this,
437
00:16:53,813 --> 00:16:56,013
but if I have to eat
one more friggin' shrimp
438
00:16:56,016 --> 00:16:57,816
I'm gonna kill myself.
439
00:16:57,817 --> 00:16:59,877
I got one!
440
00:17:02,454 --> 00:17:04,524
(flapping like a fish)
441
00:17:06,592 --> 00:17:08,762
Okay, okay, stop it!
442
00:17:08,762 --> 00:17:10,862
Oh, my goodness,
a talking whale!
443
00:17:10,864 --> 00:17:12,464
I'm not a talking wha...
444
00:17:12,465 --> 00:17:14,025
Oh, come on, that's...
445
00:17:14,034 --> 00:17:15,774
that's mean.
446
00:17:15,769 --> 00:17:18,139
What mysteries of the deep
have you come to tell me,
447
00:17:18,138 --> 00:17:19,538
o sea monster?
448
00:17:19,539 --> 00:17:20,769
Junior, it's me.
449
00:17:20,774 --> 00:17:21,974
Your dad.
Daddy!
450
00:17:21,975 --> 00:17:24,475
"Dad," 14. "Dad."
451
00:17:24,477 --> 00:17:26,707
Listen, we're in
a heap of trouble.
452
00:17:26,713 --> 00:17:28,983
Somali pirates are
about to take over the ship
453
00:17:28,982 --> 00:17:30,012
unless we stop them.
454
00:17:30,016 --> 00:17:31,016
Where's your mother?
455
00:17:31,017 --> 00:17:31,817
She's dead.
456
00:17:31,818 --> 00:17:33,948
Oh, right. Where's Donna?
457
00:17:33,953 --> 00:17:36,053
(funk music playing)
458
00:17:37,022 --> 00:17:39,022
Cleveland?
459
00:17:39,025 --> 00:17:42,125
You're all in grave danger!
460
00:17:42,128 --> 00:17:44,828
There are Somali pirates...
461
00:17:44,831 --> 00:17:46,931
they're gonna attack...
462
00:17:46,933 --> 00:17:49,033
any minute now...
463
00:17:49,035 --> 00:17:50,535
so we need to be prepared...
464
00:17:50,537 --> 00:17:51,537
(clears throat)
465
00:17:51,538 --> 00:17:55,108
♪ Ow, she's a brick house
466
00:17:55,108 --> 00:17:56,038
(gunshot)
467
00:17:56,042 --> 00:17:57,342
Give us the gold records,
468
00:17:57,343 --> 00:17:59,943
and nobody gets hurt until
after we get the gold records.
469
00:17:59,946 --> 00:18:01,646
Nevah!
Don't worry.
470
00:18:01,648 --> 00:18:03,048
I'll blow
these pirates away
471
00:18:03,049 --> 00:18:05,419
with the power of the funk!
472
00:18:05,418 --> 00:18:06,618
(strums chord)
473
00:18:06,619 --> 00:18:09,119
♪ Funk powerrrrr!
474
00:18:09,122 --> 00:18:13,492
It's okay. He wasn't one
of the original members!
475
00:18:13,493 --> 00:18:15,163
(smattering of applause)
476
00:18:15,161 --> 00:18:17,361
(gunfire, panicked screaming)
477
00:18:17,363 --> 00:18:18,703
(explosion)
478
00:18:19,665 --> 00:18:22,125
Oh, Cleveland!
479
00:18:22,135 --> 00:18:25,165
So, you decided to go on
the cruise without me, huh?
480
00:18:25,171 --> 00:18:26,801
Well, to make it up to me...
481
00:18:26,806 --> 00:18:28,806
Roberta, cover your ears.
482
00:18:28,808 --> 00:18:31,878
I want two oral sins
when I want them,
483
00:18:31,878 --> 00:18:34,948
even after a flight,
and no reciprocals.
484
00:18:34,948 --> 00:18:37,008
Get us out of this,
and you can have one
485
00:18:37,016 --> 00:18:39,916
with no reciprocals
and three egg cracks.
486
00:18:39,919 --> 00:18:41,019
Mm.
487
00:18:41,020 --> 00:18:42,990
Can I have an
egg crack now?
488
00:18:42,989 --> 00:18:44,119
Crack.
Ooh...
489
00:18:44,124 --> 00:18:47,494
Oo-hoooo, there's egg
all down my shoulders.
490
00:18:47,494 --> 00:18:48,534
Shiver.
491
00:18:48,528 --> 00:18:49,788
So gooey.
492
00:18:49,796 --> 00:18:51,026
Okay, stay here,
I'll be back.
493
00:18:51,030 --> 00:18:52,300
(shudders):
Oooh...
494
00:18:52,298 --> 00:18:53,928
That was a delayed one.
495
00:18:53,933 --> 00:18:55,773
Nice. Hm-m-m.
496
00:18:55,768 --> 00:18:58,038
(gunfire)
497
00:19:03,308 --> 00:19:05,008
(woman screams)
498
00:19:05,011 --> 00:19:06,041
(gunfire)
499
00:19:16,822 --> 00:19:18,622
We're doomed.
500
00:19:18,625 --> 00:19:20,015
Hi, Daddy... Dad.
501
00:19:20,026 --> 00:19:21,186
Sorry, son.
502
00:19:21,194 --> 00:19:22,464
I can't save us.
503
00:19:22,462 --> 00:19:23,962
I don't have the energy.
504
00:19:23,963 --> 00:19:25,703
Wait, my pills!
505
00:19:25,698 --> 00:19:27,168
Junior, would you
reach in my anus?
506
00:19:27,167 --> 00:19:28,297
Sure!
507
00:19:28,301 --> 00:19:31,101
Wait, let me check
my pocket first.
508
00:19:46,685 --> 00:19:47,685
(groans)
509
00:19:47,687 --> 00:19:48,687
(gun cocks)
510
00:19:48,688 --> 00:19:50,918
Any last puns or wordplay?
511
00:19:50,924 --> 00:19:53,164
You've heard
of pirating cable,
512
00:19:53,159 --> 00:19:56,759
but how about
cabling a pirate?
513
00:20:06,038 --> 00:20:07,308
You have defeated us.
514
00:20:07,307 --> 00:20:08,307
Have I?
515
00:20:08,308 --> 00:20:09,368
Yes! Ugh!
516
00:20:09,375 --> 00:20:10,835
I hate you!
Do you?
517
00:20:10,843 --> 00:20:11,943
Ahh!
518
00:20:11,945 --> 00:20:13,945
(ship's horn blares)
519
00:20:15,881 --> 00:20:18,621
Cleveland, you really
saved the day.
520
00:20:18,618 --> 00:20:21,648
Maybe I was wrong
about you taking those pills.
521
00:20:21,654 --> 00:20:23,824
I hope so, 'cause
I haven't stopped.
522
00:20:23,823 --> 00:20:24,823
Are you serious?
523
00:20:24,824 --> 00:20:27,064
Y-Yeap-a!
524
00:20:32,030 --> 00:20:33,970
Anybody know how
to play the guitar?
525
00:20:33,967 --> 00:20:36,267
♪ Thanks for the time
that you've given me ♪
526
00:20:36,269 --> 00:20:37,839
♪ The memories all in my mind
527
00:20:37,837 --> 00:20:39,597
♪ You're once, twice,
three times ♪
528
00:20:39,606 --> 00:20:40,736
♪ La, la, la-laaaaaaaa!
529
00:20:41,940 --> 00:20:42,870
(splashing)
530
00:20:42,875 --> 00:20:44,875
(Cleveland barking)
531
00:20:44,877 --> 00:20:46,307
(frantically chewing gum)
532
00:20:46,312 --> 00:20:48,112
Hey, I'm Cleveland Brown,
533
00:20:48,114 --> 00:20:50,414
and we had a good time
tonight-igh-igh-igh,
534
00:20:50,416 --> 00:20:52,976
and we talked about addiction
which is no laugh-- (laughs)--
535
00:20:52,986 --> 00:20:54,986
laughing matter,
which is why I'm back here
536
00:20:54,988 --> 00:20:57,658
telling you all this and we
killed a pirate and whatnot,
537
00:20:57,657 --> 00:21:00,417
but please,
addiction no bueno es bad.
538
00:21:00,426 --> 00:21:01,986
C-Bro, we going
to that party?
539
00:21:01,995 --> 00:21:03,485
You betcha!
540
00:21:03,535 --> 00:21:08,085
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
36937
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof