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shouldn't be doing this dex trust me it's gonna be over soon
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is it
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hey
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hey bill
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my wife chat bill
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dex you remember bill oh hey seminar
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see you would you excuse me for a second sure
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hey don't leave without saying goodbye
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crisp
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dex yeah
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i almost didn't recognize you looks like you put on one or
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two pounds one or two hundred
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wow
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man i think it's
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wow it's cool that you became a priest
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dex do you mind
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oh yeah sorry man you know
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i thought about being a praise maybe not catholic
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like psychopillion right
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because they can have sex you know
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i'm really not comfortable talking here oh right
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no i just i mean i want to say that
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i just think it's cool that you get to
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you know hang out with god all day
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i don't exactly hang out with god you know i teach i counsel
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or put the homeless oh yeah
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absolutely i mean i just i think it's great that you do
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god related activity all day long
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thanks i find it really hard to believe that someone of your
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moral perpetuity
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would would ever consider being a priest no
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actually i was accepted to divinity school
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really so what happened
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what's like st augustine said you know
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lord give me chastity and virtue but not just yet
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well i guess some people never change
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they care
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oh my god i can't believe how much
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weight he skate
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i can't believe he went out with him
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hello he wasn't fat then
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he could be really nice sometimes
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nice
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you slept with him didn't you
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i might have
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i have a confession to make
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oh my god you're kidding
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hey what are you doing
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he's hiding from whom everyone
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oh hey maggie you were right no one noticed i came anyway
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come on tense you were the king here
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you were elvis yeah well no i'm fat elvis
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hey babies go home
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yep you're welcome
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hi hi
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can i have a long island iced tea please sure
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all right i have to confess i don't know exactly what that is
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i'm not really a bartender
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i'm actually a student here really
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what are you saying a philosophy religion
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cool no problem because a long island iced tea okay
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is like a survey course and world religions okay
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we're starting with the far east no
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no no no we okay you get hinduism you get thouism
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you get a leaf buddhism confucianism
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it's okay we get zorastrianism
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did you know
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that the zorastrian is considered dogs deep with men
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i know i do good answer okay
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and then you get
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islam and you get the sweet twins of judaeism and christianity
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and then we come
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wela to the lone contribution of western civilization
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that coca cola
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and bubble it all together
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hmm vala longana dusty
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so does this type of thing
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usually work on young philosophy students
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i don't know did it work on you
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could only wish i'd make you rock harder
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if i could only wish i'd make you rock harder
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哦哦
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that was so great
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oh hey wait what do you want
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hey tex do you know sid sid the stack
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actually no we haven't met hey
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actually we have
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really
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oh yeah um
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wait a minute
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we were in bennett kirkagar class
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are you sure are you sure i was there really
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god must have made a big impression on you no
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i just i never listened to anybody but myself
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and that's it was just like did it man
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yeah i actually think i remember that
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hey jeremy
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i was wondering if you'd be here just let's hope you'd be here
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oh what's up in here do you guys know jeremy
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maggie rick dex this is dex dex hey
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jeremy
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just going hey i'm getting refresher and one thing
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i'm so okay you guys
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hi okay i'll see you guys later
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okay torture's over and we're going
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god
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what is so bad was it oh god you live to tell why did that come
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i'm gonna be here in the twenty fifth
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i'm think i'm gonna camp out the fifth wait
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you're not making it twenty five years
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i'm gonna see you guys tomorrow okay
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dex
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jill hey
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hey hey what's up
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tell me how you've been
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i've been really good and really good have you been good
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so have you become
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a speaker of the house yet uh no actually
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i'm a forensic anthropology
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yeah
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too long
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now we jump up and down
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chunky peanut butter too come on i take a lot of
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night
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whoa that's beautiful
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ah
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you cheat that like you kiss your mama very steve soft and sleep
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hey bro come on your truck for a few days
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it's happening in a motorcycle
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and i just got like a broken and parked out there or something
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hey when that happened
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no man
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they said it was gonna take like ten years to get a new part
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so what can i borrow or not
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i don't know
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why not was sid stanley for a few weeks
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we said she could use a truck
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sid wait wait how am i supposed to get to work walk yeah
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so dave i hear you got a honey lined up this weekend bro
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i'm so full on amped about this shit man oh
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you're already dead in the water he's right you road kill me
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what are you guys talking about
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you wanna have sex with this woman definitely
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okay then you're violating the first rule of being steve
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you must learn to eliminate your desire it's buddhist
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i think that dao was said at first
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hey we're gonna have a seminar we're gonna play golf
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okay just a short seminar in the elimination desire
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okay if you're out with this girl and you're even
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thinking about getting laid
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you're finished cause women can smell an agenda
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like shit on a shoe wait a second are you saying
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i have a better chance of getting laid if i try not to get laid
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it's kind of like a zen cone
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what's the zen COIN
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oh no i'm serious what is zen COIN
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look at me look at me okay
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technically i shouldn't be getting late
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but i do and do you know why dave
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because when i'm hanging out with a woman
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that's all i'm doing is hanging out talking
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listening
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not seeing they're thinking about how to get in bed with her
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and this completely confuses them because they're saying
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wait a minute
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i am so much better looking than this guy
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isn't he attracted to me
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the basic principle
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we pursue that which retreats from us it's from heidiger
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garacha mark said the same thing
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act like a woman can't join your club
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and she'll do almost anything to get in
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you've got so many great books better to seduce you with what
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all the better to deduce the truth with
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those were great margaritas
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my last date we had pizza and a six pack whoa
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julie i don't know if i'd call this date
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really yeah
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it's just dating so tricky
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that's all i mean you're really
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cool and you have a great personality i just don't want to
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man i just don't want to mess up our friendship friendship
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we just met better safe than sorry
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hey
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hey
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what are you doing
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gluing
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okay
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what are you gluing
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uh
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i'm gonna have to go with cardboard okay
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so like do the glue and cardboard together
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have a larger purpose
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do they need to have a larger purpose
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maybe i need them to have a larger purpose
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okay then for you it's a model of a set i'm doing
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okay set of steak knive
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set of julie andrews plates on the bradford exchange
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you know what
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set as in stage job opera oh
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my god i get it you're the set designer for the opera hey
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you're good
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oh you know what we've got to talk about the that truck
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oh yeah actually um i made a schedule on my computer
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oh well how marshall brady have you oh thank you
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well i think i should get the car on tuesdays and thursdays
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since you don't work those days
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i do other things i'm sure you do anyway
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you got to work at seven forty five and get off at three correct
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i captain
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okay i go to work at eight and get up and four
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so either you drop me off at seven thirty
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so you can get to school on time in
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which case i have to wait around for half an hour
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or or you drop me off at seven forty five
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meaning that i have to wait around for an hour in the afternoon
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so i suggest we alternate every other day to be fair wait
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we should really alternate every second day to be fair
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because you only wait half an hour
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and i have to wait for a full hour
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or every
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other days cool great
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great now that that settles
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oh hey i wanted to say
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that i'm really sorry i didn't recognize you with the reunion
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don't worry about it
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so when do you start like banging on the old skins
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oh when i was nine
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i wanted to be one of josey and the pussycats josey and the who
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oh my god you're kidding right
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joe
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trick to you man
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i had chosen the pussycat stickers on my lunchbox no way me too
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hold on a second i bet you don't remember the buggaloos oh
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oh my god i'm sorry it's just that nobody i know
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remembers the buggaloos
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i love the buggaloos wait how can you not love
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like a british rock band
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consisting of four teenage bumblebees
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what's this well dex is looking us dinner
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can i talk to you a second
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i'm blanching the butter okay martha stewart when you're done
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someone please watch the butter for me
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mang on my mind
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but about it your life isn't complicated
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enough sleeping with a married woman now
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you gotta start hitting on my wife's friend
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i mean
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she's staying at my house guy
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come on man wait so this is about you and your comfort level
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i like oh i'm sorry you're not you're not here to hit on cid
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dude i came over to make a schedule
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all right look just
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just don't push steve on sid don't worry about it man
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but i think seriously
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most people want to composite the opposite sex
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because like you gals aren't ever gonna find antonio banderas
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with the personality of fred mcmurray
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and i'm never gonna get raquel
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welch with the personality of lucille ball
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what's wrong with just lucille ball
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what's wrong with just rico watch
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amen i mean my biggest furious okay
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i want to marry the woman that i really want to hang out with
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and talk to my golden years
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but i die in some fiery car crash when i'm forty
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and then i miss all those good years of having sex you know
268
00:18:18,333 --> 00:18:19,599
so don't get married
269
00:18:20,133 --> 00:18:22,266
barring some terrific advance of medical science
270
00:18:22,266 --> 00:18:23,766
that would allow you to splice
271
00:18:23,933 --> 00:18:25,699
lucille ball with raquel weld
272
00:18:25,933 --> 00:18:27,266
what do you look for in a woman
273
00:18:28,266 --> 00:18:29,533
uh low standards
274
00:18:29,800 --> 00:18:32,133
ha ha ha well she left me thin oh
275
00:18:32,133 --> 00:18:34,166
you wouldn't date a heavy woman no way
276
00:18:34,733 --> 00:18:37,566
i am a fattest i admit it and i'm the worst kind of fattest
277
00:18:37,566 --> 00:18:42,966
i'm a fat fattest scandalous look would you ever date a fat guy
278
00:18:43,900 --> 00:18:44,700
sure i would
279
00:18:45,733 --> 00:18:46,533
have you
280
00:18:50,733 --> 00:18:52,733
no i rest my case
281
00:18:53,400 --> 00:18:54,200
ha
282
00:18:54,933 --> 00:18:57,199
you know you've never been happening with any women you've dated
283
00:18:57,500 --> 00:18:59,566
well that's male insanity syndrome you know
284
00:18:59,566 --> 00:19:02,399
that that is just you're with the woman and no matter how cool
285
00:19:02,400 --> 00:19:03,066
she is
286
00:19:03,066 --> 00:19:05,499
you're always thinking maybe i could do a little bit better
287
00:19:05,500 --> 00:19:08,100
or i could trade up somehow you know trade up
288
00:19:09,766 --> 00:19:12,399
hey don't look at me i think you're the sun
289
00:19:12,400 --> 00:19:14,100
the moon and the stars dex is just bitter
290
00:19:14,100 --> 00:19:15,300
because he's never been in love
291
00:19:15,300 --> 00:19:16,500
i love my dog
292
00:19:17,866 --> 00:19:21,266
very moving very happy for you jeremy
293
00:19:22,000 --> 00:19:24,300
hey guys am i early no
294
00:19:24,366 --> 00:19:26,199
we should get going we're gonna be late
295
00:19:28,133 --> 00:19:28,899
where you guys going
296
00:19:28,900 --> 00:19:30,000
oh we're gonna go here
297
00:19:30,066 --> 00:19:32,399
friends of mine in a band anyway don't forget tomorrow
298
00:19:32,500 --> 00:19:34,466
seven thirty pick up seven thirty sharp
299
00:19:37,333 --> 00:19:38,799
bye see you guys
300
00:19:40,766 --> 00:19:41,899
see you later bye
301
00:19:53,466 --> 00:19:54,266
hey
302
00:19:55,200 --> 00:19:58,200
clearly i'm gonna need my own transportation i'm almost ready
303
00:19:58,900 --> 00:19:59,700
come on
304
00:20:03,600 --> 00:20:05,100
oh guys
305
00:20:05,900 --> 00:20:08,933
matt this is sid chris sid
306
00:20:09,466 --> 00:20:10,799
dave sid dave
307
00:20:12,700 --> 00:20:14,600
okay back in here i'm just gonna change real quick
308
00:20:22,166 --> 00:20:22,966
master
309
00:20:23,500 --> 00:20:26,800
this is sin this is sin master you want the ball want the ball
310
00:20:26,866 --> 00:20:29,199
want the ball want the ball get the ball
311
00:20:51,800 --> 00:20:55,133
would you describe this as a typical warning for you
312
00:20:56,266 --> 00:20:59,066
i don't know usually i spend this time cross training
313
00:21:02,500 --> 00:21:07,400
so you smoke out for breakfast you work part time and you
314
00:21:08,100 --> 00:21:09,266
have limited potential
315
00:21:10,300 --> 00:21:13,133
no no no just the opposite i mean
316
00:21:13,400 --> 00:21:14,866
you were the smartest guy in school
317
00:21:15,533 --> 00:21:17,199
oh yeah but now
318
00:21:17,866 --> 00:21:19,199
i don't know don't you ever
319
00:21:20,366 --> 00:21:21,766
what don't i ever what
320
00:21:22,300 --> 00:21:23,900
nothing's none of my business no
321
00:21:23,900 --> 00:21:26,000
really whatever what don't i ever what
322
00:21:28,100 --> 00:21:29,266
don't you ever want to
323
00:21:29,933 --> 00:21:31,533
do more with your life
324
00:21:32,100 --> 00:21:37,666
like climb a tree and learn a foreign language or i don't know
325
00:21:38,100 --> 00:21:39,266
get a full time job
326
00:21:40,700 --> 00:21:42,200
doing stuff is overrated
327
00:21:42,366 --> 00:21:43,599
like hitler he did a lot
328
00:21:43,600 --> 00:21:45,300
but don't we all wish he would have just stayed home
329
00:21:45,300 --> 00:21:46,933
and gotten stoned oh
330
00:21:46,933 --> 00:21:49,966
i see so your only options are to get stoned or commit genocide
331
00:21:51,166 --> 00:21:53,199
lotsa said the sage
332
00:21:53,400 --> 00:21:56,133
because he does nothing never ruins anything
333
00:21:56,266 --> 00:21:58,866
ah that sounds like a life of a passion and excitement
334
00:21:59,500 --> 00:22:00,300
buddha
335
00:22:00,933 --> 00:22:03,799
said passionlessness is the best approaches
336
00:22:03,800 --> 00:22:06,500
and the pillsbury dough boy said eat me when you're ready
337
00:22:07,566 --> 00:22:08,366
did he really
338
00:22:08,800 --> 00:22:10,333
i just wanted to see if you were listening
339
00:22:10,333 --> 00:22:12,999
if you're giving me some bullshit slacker routine
340
00:22:13,066 --> 00:22:13,966
why is it okay
341
00:22:13,966 --> 00:22:15,766
the good old fashioned american slacker
342
00:22:15,800 --> 00:22:17,800
gets no respect for his detachment but hey
343
00:22:17,866 --> 00:22:19,566
the buddhist monk does somehow
344
00:22:19,566 --> 00:22:21,999
i don't think that your detachment is the same self willed
345
00:22:22,000 --> 00:22:24,400
self disciplined attachment of the buddhist monk
346
00:22:25,333 --> 00:22:26,299
what do you think
347
00:22:26,400 --> 00:22:27,166
what do you think you think all
348
00:22:27,166 --> 00:22:28,499
buddhist monks are like the dolly llama
349
00:22:28,500 --> 00:22:30,366
i mean you don't think they're guys and they paul right
350
00:22:30,466 --> 00:22:31,599
we're like what should i do
351
00:22:31,666 --> 00:22:32,366
should i carry
352
00:22:32,366 --> 00:22:33,266
packs of heavy
353
00:22:33,266 --> 00:22:35,533
shit for westerners up to the top of the base camp amount of
354
00:22:35,533 --> 00:22:37,499
verse or should i just stay down here and cat men do
355
00:22:37,500 --> 00:22:38,200
and maybe just
356
00:22:38,200 --> 00:22:41,300
chant all day and check out chicks and pretend to be holy
357
00:22:41,300 --> 00:22:41,800
i mean why
358
00:22:41,800 --> 00:22:44,800
is everything cooler when it happens in the foreign country
359
00:22:45,000 --> 00:22:51,300
why zach why because because period the face of the buddha
360
00:22:51,733 --> 00:22:52,733
the buddha belly
361
00:22:53,000 --> 00:22:55,000
the buddha belly would you like to rub the belly
362
00:22:55,666 --> 00:22:57,766
no god don't ride okay
363
00:22:57,766 --> 00:23:00,499
okay so i'll pick you up around four thirty oh
364
00:23:00,500 --> 00:23:02,900
uh you know what i have a ride today so don't worry about it
365
00:23:02,966 --> 00:23:04,933
today's cool okay okay
366
00:23:34,400 --> 00:23:35,566
do you wanna make love
367
00:23:40,566 --> 00:23:41,366
what's wrong
368
00:23:42,366 --> 00:23:43,366
not this
369
00:23:45,333 --> 00:23:46,566
it's um
370
00:23:47,600 --> 00:23:51,066
sorry it's just that phrase what what phrase making love
371
00:23:51,366 --> 00:23:53,299
it just reminds me of that like
372
00:23:54,133 --> 00:23:56,366
incense that you buy at convenience stores
373
00:23:56,466 --> 00:23:58,933
like this airbrush couple you know
374
00:23:59,266 --> 00:24:00,599
i mean i'm sorry
375
00:24:03,533 --> 00:24:04,333
what
376
00:24:05,000 --> 00:24:06,566
if i wasn't married would you
377
00:24:07,300 --> 00:24:08,333
still be with me
378
00:24:09,400 --> 00:24:10,666
but you're married yes
379
00:24:10,666 --> 00:24:12,866
but let's out with single you're not single
380
00:24:12,966 --> 00:24:15,099
i've been thinking about leaving ed
381
00:24:16,533 --> 00:24:17,766
but i you know
382
00:24:20,166 --> 00:24:21,599
i just don't get it man
383
00:24:21,600 --> 00:24:24,166
i've been hanging out with girls my own life you think i
384
00:24:24,166 --> 00:24:25,166
understand them by now
385
00:24:25,166 --> 00:24:25,966
right
386
00:24:26,933 --> 00:24:30,866
your sisters don't count aha yeah very funny man
387
00:24:32,766 --> 00:24:35,099
i'm serious if you're hanging out with women as friends
388
00:24:35,100 --> 00:24:37,300
and you're doing your research in the wrong library
389
00:24:38,700 --> 00:24:40,266
what's wrong with being friends with women
390
00:24:40,466 --> 00:24:42,699
nothing but getting out of that category of friend
391
00:24:42,700 --> 00:24:44,600
is harder than like getting out of alcatraz
392
00:24:45,533 --> 00:24:48,466
well hold on you told me not to be lustful
393
00:24:49,866 --> 00:24:50,666
yeah
394
00:24:52,900 --> 00:24:54,800
it doesn't make any sense
395
00:24:55,000 --> 00:24:57,333
i mean i'm not supposed to come on to a girl right
396
00:24:57,333 --> 00:24:59,199
but i'm not supposed to be your friend either
397
00:24:59,600 --> 00:25:02,866
okay back up in this particular instance where you desireless
398
00:25:03,966 --> 00:25:06,866
man i tried but she was just so hot
399
00:25:08,866 --> 00:25:10,733
dude you didn't make a pass out or did you
400
00:25:10,900 --> 00:25:11,800
what sort of you know
401
00:25:11,800 --> 00:25:13,600
i sort of made it move you know
402
00:25:13,600 --> 00:25:16,000
i put my hand over there or something you know
403
00:25:16,300 --> 00:25:17,466
you didn't what happened
404
00:25:17,933 --> 00:25:20,699
she said she felt like it was too soon
405
00:25:21,066 --> 00:25:22,866
of course she did alright
406
00:25:23,066 --> 00:25:25,333
you've got to learn to hang out with a woman without groping her
407
00:25:25,333 --> 00:25:26,866
within the first ten minutes okay
408
00:25:26,866 --> 00:25:29,066
and this takes us to the second rule of being steve
409
00:25:29,300 --> 00:25:32,200
all right you have to do something excellent in her presence
410
00:25:32,466 --> 00:25:34,566
thus demonstrating your sexual worthiness
411
00:25:35,333 --> 00:25:37,099
something excellent um
412
00:25:37,333 --> 00:25:38,766
yeah man you can't you know
413
00:25:38,766 --> 00:25:42,099
just say hey i'm dave i like smoking pot
414
00:25:42,133 --> 00:25:44,333
i like reading the sports page on the john
415
00:25:44,333 --> 00:25:45,399
you want to have sex with me
416
00:25:45,500 --> 00:25:47,866
okay okay so what if you're not excellent at anything well
417
00:25:47,866 --> 00:25:50,166
then you got a bigger problem picking up women come on
418
00:25:50,166 --> 00:25:51,533
man i'm serious dude
419
00:25:51,533 --> 00:25:52,466
i'm pretty serious
420
00:25:52,466 --> 00:25:53,699
too everybody's good at something
421
00:25:53,700 --> 00:25:55,466
just figure out what your excellent had
422
00:25:57,500 --> 00:25:59,300
i'm an excellent camper
423
00:25:59,800 --> 00:26:02,600
wonderful but you can't camp in front of a chick
424
00:26:03,666 --> 00:26:05,399
well what are you excellent at huh
425
00:26:10,933 --> 00:26:13,166
these cards these cards suck
426
00:26:14,700 --> 00:26:15,500
but
427
00:26:18,100 --> 00:26:19,966
i'm gonna put in two crayons
428
00:26:25,866 --> 00:26:27,366
how you doing buddy huh
429
00:26:27,466 --> 00:26:29,499
you guess i'm up your sleeve pal
430
00:26:30,200 --> 00:26:32,600
now what what now well
431
00:26:33,400 --> 00:26:35,733
what now is that we just show everybody what we got
432
00:26:35,733 --> 00:26:38,966
and we see who wins okay hard to do
433
00:26:40,800 --> 00:26:44,700
mmm that's good that's very good you got two pair uh huh
434
00:26:45,200 --> 00:26:48,600
that's very good but i've got three kids
435
00:26:50,300 --> 00:26:52,400
crayons i win all the crayons oh
436
00:26:52,500 --> 00:26:56,133
i win all the crayons i win all the crayons
437
00:26:56,266 --> 00:26:58,999
you know i hate people who gloat but haha
438
00:26:59,500 --> 00:27:02,933
the winner i got your crayons and your crayon and your crayon
439
00:27:03,066 --> 00:27:06,366
there's a lady at the door where right there
440
00:27:07,066 --> 00:27:11,133
hi lady at the door hi lady at the door hi guys
441
00:27:11,600 --> 00:27:12,766
do you want to play
442
00:27:12,866 --> 00:27:16,966
sure thanks well come on down bring your crayons
443
00:27:22,800 --> 00:27:24,400
you sure you don't mind giving core your ride oh
444
00:27:24,400 --> 00:27:25,733
god don't be silly
445
00:27:26,066 --> 00:27:28,933
actually i was thinking of going to baskin robins but
446
00:27:29,333 --> 00:27:30,866
you probably don't want to go
447
00:27:31,200 --> 00:27:34,600
what baskin robins ice cream
448
00:27:38,066 --> 00:27:40,299
you know when your mom makes sloppy joes
449
00:27:40,300 --> 00:27:42,200
and she puts all the sloppy stuff
450
00:27:42,300 --> 00:27:43,333
in the middle of the brand
451
00:27:43,333 --> 00:27:46,466
and it spills out everywhere i feel like the sloppy stuff
452
00:27:47,700 --> 00:27:49,300
hey does anybody want a kiss
453
00:27:51,366 --> 00:27:53,099
an ice cream kiss
454
00:27:53,400 --> 00:27:55,400
what's that let me show you
455
00:27:57,133 --> 00:27:58,399
what see
456
00:27:58,700 --> 00:28:01,666
now you can taste my ice cream and i can taste yours yeah
457
00:28:02,900 --> 00:28:04,600
cool
458
00:28:05,500 --> 00:28:06,300
um
459
00:28:07,100 --> 00:28:08,066
now i have a kiss
460
00:28:11,000 --> 00:28:17,100
oh an ice cream kiss
461
00:28:25,300 --> 00:28:27,566
shoot i left some work at the oppo
462
00:28:27,566 --> 00:28:29,399
do you mind if we swing by so did they go
463
00:28:40,366 --> 00:28:41,999
wow it's pretty cool huh
464
00:28:43,133 --> 00:28:44,299
it's very cool
465
00:29:01,666 --> 00:29:03,099
i'm asking what the play
466
00:29:04,366 --> 00:29:05,533
who is this guy cortez
467
00:29:05,933 --> 00:29:08,066
uh that's don givani
468
00:29:11,066 --> 00:29:12,199
hence the opera
469
00:29:13,533 --> 00:29:15,699
did you know kirker guard was obsessed with don giovanni
470
00:29:15,933 --> 00:29:19,266
that makes sense really what does that make sense well
471
00:29:19,266 --> 00:29:22,866
okay because don giovanni was this seducer okay
472
00:29:22,866 --> 00:29:24,499
and kirker guard wrote a lot about seduction
473
00:29:24,500 --> 00:29:25,866
he wrote diary of a seducer
474
00:29:25,866 --> 00:29:28,733
and he wrote different essays on things
475
00:29:28,733 --> 00:29:32,333
and he said that philosophy was i'm trying to sound smart now
476
00:29:32,333 --> 00:29:33,533
so just stop me
477
00:29:35,366 --> 00:29:36,199
you do that a lot
478
00:29:36,200 --> 00:29:38,800
don't you yes i do and it usually works on weak minded women
479
00:29:38,966 --> 00:29:41,499
but clearly a superior intellect like yours isn't
480
00:29:42,266 --> 00:29:44,733
fall for it no okay
481
00:29:46,400 --> 00:29:47,200
bye
482
00:29:50,533 --> 00:29:52,966
so what did kirkagard have to say about don giovanni
483
00:29:53,066 --> 00:29:54,266
he talked about faith
484
00:29:54,566 --> 00:29:56,499
in god and other people
485
00:29:57,966 --> 00:30:01,399
elaborate um you know about his fiance right
486
00:30:01,566 --> 00:30:02,999
regina also right
487
00:30:03,333 --> 00:30:05,766
he was afraid that once she got to really know him
488
00:30:05,766 --> 00:30:07,399
his whole dark side and everything
489
00:30:07,500 --> 00:30:08,966
that she wouldn't love him anymore
490
00:30:08,966 --> 00:30:10,899
and that's where faith comes in because you've got to say
491
00:30:10,966 --> 00:30:13,266
even though i'm afraid that this person is gonna hurt me
492
00:30:13,266 --> 00:30:14,733
i'm afraid i'm gonna get rejected
493
00:30:14,733 --> 00:30:17,066
i'm gonna make a leap of faith and love this person
494
00:30:17,666 --> 00:30:18,999
but he couldn't do that
495
00:30:19,266 --> 00:30:21,166
what does this have to do with don giovanni
496
00:30:22,300 --> 00:30:24,866
don giovanni slept with thousands of women because he was afraid
497
00:30:24,866 --> 00:30:26,166
he wouldn't be loved by one
498
00:30:45,866 --> 00:30:47,999
okay here's a leap of faith for you
499
00:30:48,300 --> 00:30:49,466
do you want to go out sometime
500
00:30:50,100 --> 00:30:52,133
my friends are having a pool party this weekend
501
00:30:54,200 --> 00:30:56,200
um i don't think it's a good idea
502
00:30:59,533 --> 00:31:00,333
okay
503
00:31:01,200 --> 00:31:02,933
okay right fine
504
00:31:58,566 --> 00:31:59,366
hey
505
00:32:00,066 --> 00:32:02,199
could you make sure carmen sees these
506
00:32:02,466 --> 00:32:05,966
sure what about the meeting with steve ramsey cancel
507
00:32:06,466 --> 00:32:08,699
i'm going home good night
508
00:32:42,666 --> 00:32:43,699
are you hungry
509
00:33:06,766 --> 00:33:07,566
to him
510
00:33:27,900 --> 00:33:31,966
sorry sorry i'm late yeah yeah yeah yeah just pay in steve
511
00:33:32,300 --> 00:33:33,366
thanks steve
512
00:33:34,066 --> 00:33:36,499
alright thanks guy hey
513
00:33:36,500 --> 00:33:37,933
why does he always get a hey steve
514
00:33:37,933 --> 00:33:39,599
and all i ever get is a hey guy
515
00:33:39,766 --> 00:33:41,466
what is this steve shit anyways
516
00:33:41,766 --> 00:33:43,599
nothing it's just you don't have to do what that stuff
517
00:33:43,600 --> 00:33:46,866
i was telling you about picking up women oh who steve
518
00:33:48,600 --> 00:33:49,533
steve man come on
519
00:33:49,533 --> 00:33:52,066
steve is the prototype of cool american male you know
520
00:33:52,066 --> 00:33:53,799
i'm talking about steve mcgarrett alright
521
00:33:53,800 --> 00:33:55,133
steve uh austin
522
00:33:55,333 --> 00:33:56,499
steve mcqueen
523
00:33:56,766 --> 00:33:58,366
you know he's the man on his horse
524
00:33:58,366 --> 00:34:00,699
the guy alone like he has his own code of honor
525
00:34:00,700 --> 00:34:03,966
his own code of ethics his own rules of living man he never
526
00:34:04,133 --> 00:34:06,766
ever tries to impress the women but he always gets the girl
527
00:34:07,866 --> 00:34:09,733
so who's steve mcgarret
528
00:34:09,766 --> 00:34:10,699
are you joking
529
00:34:21,200 --> 00:34:24,133
okay okay oh i five oh man okay i get it
530
00:34:24,600 --> 00:34:25,566
who's steve austin
531
00:34:25,733 --> 00:34:27,766
ah ha oscar
532
00:34:27,766 --> 00:34:28,733
oscar and steve
533
00:34:29,166 --> 00:34:31,399
steve she's breaking up
534
00:34:37,533 --> 00:34:38,533
we can rebuild
535
00:34:39,266 --> 00:34:40,066
it
536
00:34:40,933 --> 00:34:43,899
oh yeah it's million dollar man okay
537
00:34:44,066 --> 00:34:45,533
but the ultimate steve
538
00:34:46,400 --> 00:34:49,166
steve mcqueen oh steve mcqueen
539
00:34:50,600 --> 00:34:53,500
dude the great escape man the great escape
540
00:34:53,500 --> 00:34:55,100
you know the nazis are after when he's on the beamer
541
00:34:55,100 --> 00:34:56,366
he's like man and he looks up
542
00:34:56,366 --> 00:34:57,566
he comes up on the hill and he's like
543
00:34:57,566 --> 00:34:58,866
there's the big fans and that's
544
00:34:58,933 --> 00:34:59,933
please go come on
545
00:34:59,933 --> 00:35:00,866
do it to the opinion
546
00:35:01,666 --> 00:35:04,066
so anybody whose name steve is a steve
547
00:35:04,466 --> 00:35:05,666
no steve's not a name
548
00:35:06,166 --> 00:35:09,533
steve is a state of mind it's a way of living you know
549
00:35:09,533 --> 00:35:12,733
i'm saying like james bond is a steve man
550
00:35:13,533 --> 00:35:15,299
spider man is it steve
551
00:35:15,533 --> 00:35:17,999
michael jordan is this steve touche
552
00:35:18,100 --> 00:35:21,400
all right all right okay so if i'm not a steve then what am i
553
00:35:21,600 --> 00:35:22,400
you're a
554
00:35:24,533 --> 00:35:26,766
you're a you're a stew
555
00:35:29,666 --> 00:35:30,799
what's a stew
556
00:35:31,800 --> 00:35:33,266
no come on what's a stew
557
00:35:33,466 --> 00:35:34,733
don't look at me man
558
00:35:35,866 --> 00:35:37,499
it's the opposite of steve
559
00:35:38,000 --> 00:35:39,166
see dex doesn't want to insult you
560
00:35:39,166 --> 00:35:40,899
we just can't help it just think
561
00:35:40,966 --> 00:35:42,766
barney five gomer pile
562
00:35:43,500 --> 00:35:44,533
jug head
563
00:35:46,133 --> 00:35:48,299
wait i'm the opposite of everything that's cool
564
00:35:49,300 --> 00:35:50,466
don't take it personally
565
00:35:50,900 --> 00:35:51,866
no fuck you man
566
00:35:51,866 --> 00:35:53,399
you guys are all steve and i'm going
567
00:35:53,400 --> 00:35:56,500
where fucking pile man fuck that screw you guys
568
00:35:57,000 --> 00:35:58,300
screw you off come on
569
00:36:00,733 --> 00:36:01,533
dave
570
00:36:03,966 --> 00:36:04,766
you'll be alright
571
00:36:20,800 --> 00:36:21,600
hmm
572
00:36:22,966 --> 00:36:24,566
was that piece of shit right there
573
00:36:26,766 --> 00:36:29,466
sid's under the impression it's a motorcycle
574
00:36:31,566 --> 00:36:33,399
does it run no
575
00:36:33,900 --> 00:36:36,000
but she still thinks she's gonna ride it to work
576
00:36:36,700 --> 00:36:40,266
wait a minute she'd rather ride that than deal with me
577
00:36:40,733 --> 00:36:42,599
that guy who was she sick of being late
578
00:36:44,466 --> 00:36:46,366
hey do we have any plans friday
579
00:36:46,766 --> 00:36:49,799
no why cause sid just invited us to her opening night
580
00:36:52,700 --> 00:36:54,133
no offense but
581
00:36:55,066 --> 00:36:58,566
guys guys don't you opera jeremy's going
582
00:36:59,700 --> 00:37:02,133
have you ever noticed how in the beginning of a relationship
583
00:37:02,133 --> 00:37:05,133
right a guy will do just about anything with his girlfriend
584
00:37:05,133 --> 00:37:07,899
because just the thought of seeing her naked gets him excited
585
00:37:07,900 --> 00:37:09,466
about going to the opera
586
00:37:09,766 --> 00:37:13,466
okay a he's not my boyfriend and b maybe he likes alpha
587
00:37:13,800 --> 00:37:15,366
okay i'm gonna tell you two things okay
588
00:37:15,533 --> 00:37:19,066
a he is and b he doesn't okay
589
00:37:19,066 --> 00:37:21,299
let me tell you two what should i stop flirting oh
590
00:37:21,466 --> 00:37:23,299
what are you talking about learning
591
00:37:23,300 --> 00:37:23,666
yeah
592
00:37:23,666 --> 00:37:26,066
you know this is really great and everything but we gotta go
593
00:37:26,066 --> 00:37:30,533
okay yeah whatever fine forever are we gonna do any work
594
00:37:37,600 --> 00:37:38,400
hey
595
00:37:39,566 --> 00:37:41,166
this came for you this morning
596
00:37:41,333 --> 00:37:44,299
i think it's your im populator or something oh hey
597
00:37:44,900 --> 00:37:47,333
all right yeah hey
598
00:37:47,333 --> 00:37:50,466
look i wanted to say i'm sorry about that whole stew thing oh
599
00:37:50,466 --> 00:37:51,766
don't even worry about it man
600
00:37:52,933 --> 00:37:54,599
i'm feeling pretty steve today
601
00:37:54,733 --> 00:37:58,966
really yeah did i had the best date of my life last night dude i
602
00:37:59,400 --> 00:38:00,566
i think i'm in love
603
00:38:01,600 --> 00:38:05,566
dude i hope you didn't tell her that no no
604
00:38:05,733 --> 00:38:07,699
dude there's a certain order you're supposed to do things
605
00:38:07,700 --> 00:38:09,933
and in time someone you love them is definitely last
606
00:38:09,933 --> 00:38:10,766
in that order
607
00:38:11,333 --> 00:38:12,499
what are you supposed to tell him
608
00:38:12,666 --> 00:38:14,866
maybe you're fortieth wedding anniversary or something
609
00:38:14,866 --> 00:38:15,999
i don't see a problem
610
00:38:16,000 --> 00:38:18,000
i'm gonna tell you this one last time and maybe
611
00:38:18,000 --> 00:38:19,566
you should tattoo it on your dick
612
00:38:19,600 --> 00:38:21,666
so that you don't forget okay
613
00:38:21,766 --> 00:38:24,699
we pursue that which retreats from us
614
00:38:25,900 --> 00:38:28,333
i just don't get the whole retreating thing you know
615
00:38:28,333 --> 00:38:30,199
look chicks are like hunters man they want a bag
616
00:38:30,200 --> 00:38:32,566
a line or a bear something really hard to catch
617
00:38:32,666 --> 00:38:34,399
and it long comes day you know
618
00:38:34,466 --> 00:38:36,933
and you're like this affectionate little puppy you're cute
619
00:38:36,933 --> 00:38:38,333
but you're way too easy to catch
620
00:38:38,333 --> 00:38:39,933
and that bores them and with chicks
621
00:38:40,000 --> 00:38:42,766
boredom equals death man you can't bore them
622
00:38:42,933 --> 00:38:46,099
so now i'm boring no no dogs okay
623
00:38:46,100 --> 00:38:48,600
they don't chase a rock that's just sitting on the ground
624
00:38:48,666 --> 00:38:50,399
maybe some dogs do no
625
00:38:50,400 --> 00:38:51,533
they like chasing rabbits
626
00:38:51,533 --> 00:38:52,933
that aren't even out of bushes you know what
627
00:38:52,933 --> 00:38:56,299
i mean oh so now i'm supposed to be like a bunny no
628
00:38:56,300 --> 00:38:58,533
no you're supposed to be the thing that retreats okay
629
00:38:58,533 --> 00:38:59,733
and that takes us to
630
00:38:59,933 --> 00:39:03,199
part three of the dao of steve okay alright
631
00:39:03,200 --> 00:39:04,900
after you've eliminated your desire
632
00:39:04,966 --> 00:39:06,999
and after you've been excellent in her presence
633
00:39:07,100 --> 00:39:10,266
then you must retreat okay
634
00:39:11,500 --> 00:39:13,566
that's just too complicated look man it
635
00:39:13,666 --> 00:39:14,699
for great looking guys
636
00:39:14,700 --> 00:39:17,266
they got no problem they can just slide by on their appearance
637
00:39:17,400 --> 00:39:19,400
but for guys like us man okay
638
00:39:19,866 --> 00:39:20,933
like successful
639
00:39:20,933 --> 00:39:23,766
hooking up with the ladies requires a little work
640
00:39:23,800 --> 00:39:25,266
and a lot of intelligence
641
00:39:25,700 --> 00:39:26,500
all right
642
00:39:27,266 --> 00:39:28,333
thanks for this thing man
643
00:39:28,866 --> 00:39:29,933
can you come in handy
644
00:40:06,500 --> 00:40:07,300
sorry
645
00:40:07,966 --> 00:40:09,899
when's your stupid motorcycle gonna be thick
646
00:40:10,100 --> 00:40:11,966
when the stupid part gets here okay
647
00:40:20,333 --> 00:40:24,066
i'm a ferry can you put ferry sprinkles in my hair are you sure
648
00:40:24,066 --> 00:40:24,933
you're a ferry
649
00:40:25,500 --> 00:40:29,266
okay these are very powerful sprinkles i made that myself okay
650
00:40:35,733 --> 00:40:36,533
ok
651
00:40:41,400 --> 00:40:43,066
hey do you have any glue we could borrow
652
00:40:44,266 --> 00:40:46,866
oh uh sure yeah
653
00:40:50,166 --> 00:40:51,933
here you go so what are you gonna do this weekend
654
00:40:52,400 --> 00:40:54,900
oh i was um this friend of mine
655
00:40:54,900 --> 00:40:56,366
he's house sitting at this big house
656
00:40:56,366 --> 00:40:58,266
it's got this cool pool and views
657
00:40:58,266 --> 00:41:00,799
and we're gonna have like a pool party barbecue thing
658
00:41:01,133 --> 00:41:01,999
really yeah
659
00:41:43,933 --> 00:41:47,499
look men try and achieve success for one reason to impress women
660
00:41:47,500 --> 00:41:49,766
right i mean that's the only reason that they build companies
661
00:41:49,900 --> 00:41:51,066
or they write books
662
00:41:51,066 --> 00:41:53,533
or they compete in the sports and stuff i mean and the problem
663
00:41:53,533 --> 00:41:55,266
is in life is that if you figured out
664
00:41:55,266 --> 00:41:57,333
how you can get laid without achieving anything
665
00:41:57,500 --> 00:41:59,200
then you can lose your motivation all together
666
00:41:59,533 --> 00:42:01,166
so there's no reason to get off the couch
667
00:42:02,600 --> 00:42:03,400
do you want a drink
668
00:42:36,533 --> 00:42:40,399
like steve mcqueen when you're driving in your car
669
00:42:43,866 --> 00:42:48,166
your dreams spawn when you're smoking yours again it's so
670
00:42:56,933 --> 00:43:02,399
you was a commercial spot on the tv screen
671
00:43:03,566 --> 00:43:05,099
movie star war
672
00:43:05,733 --> 00:43:09,866
you think you are a movie movie star
673
00:43:10,133 --> 00:43:12,799
movie star war you think
674
00:43:19,666 --> 00:43:23,666
couldn't resist my powerful penetrating stare could you no
675
00:43:23,666 --> 00:43:24,599
i wanted to tell you
676
00:43:24,600 --> 00:43:26,733
you got a huge glove of guacamole on your shirt
677
00:43:30,300 --> 00:43:32,166
i wouldn't want you to make a bad impression on your date
678
00:43:32,966 --> 00:43:33,799
she's um
679
00:43:40,500 --> 00:43:41,666
hi there huh
680
00:43:42,266 --> 00:43:42,933
sorry took so long
681
00:43:42,933 --> 00:43:44,199
i'm ready to this friend of mine and
682
00:43:44,200 --> 00:43:45,533
she was really depressed and
683
00:43:45,966 --> 00:43:47,699
oh is she okay uh
684
00:43:48,366 --> 00:43:51,333
you know she will be or whatever but
685
00:43:51,500 --> 00:43:52,133
the thing was
686
00:43:52,133 --> 00:43:53,799
i was going through depression a long time ago and
687
00:43:54,666 --> 00:43:58,099
she was really there for me so i just figured i'd pay back time
688
00:43:58,100 --> 00:44:00,666
and i was like a car may thing did you wanna go talk to her
689
00:44:00,966 --> 00:44:03,999
no no i just i wanted to find you i'm here with you and
690
00:44:04,400 --> 00:44:07,200
you don't know anybody here this is i'll be fine
691
00:44:07,500 --> 00:44:08,866
you should go talk to your friend
692
00:44:24,200 --> 00:44:25,400
uh who's this guy
693
00:44:25,600 --> 00:44:28,166
it's a she oh scott or hey girl
694
00:44:31,166 --> 00:44:34,299
oh hi girl who are you
695
00:44:35,266 --> 00:44:39,733
oh my god no what a little blissy oh
696
00:44:40,800 --> 00:44:41,700
yeah sure
697
00:44:42,900 --> 00:44:44,266
do you guys have no each other
698
00:44:44,366 --> 00:44:45,333
no hi
699
00:44:46,200 --> 00:44:48,300
i'm sad hi said beth
700
00:44:49,766 --> 00:44:53,199
hey i was looking for you guys hey
701
00:44:54,933 --> 00:44:55,799
hey doug
702
00:44:59,400 --> 00:45:02,333
i got some friends here from work i'd like you to meet all right
703
00:45:02,566 --> 00:45:03,666
take care all right nice
704
00:45:04,166 --> 00:45:07,999
to meet you give you around for a while sure bye
705
00:45:14,966 --> 00:45:16,699
so are you gonna go swimming
706
00:45:18,066 --> 00:45:23,566
huh oh no no i mean i'm a non swimming non naked kinda guy
707
00:45:23,700 --> 00:45:26,133
hey man say no to nudity that's my motto
708
00:45:26,366 --> 00:45:29,266
really yeah cause i would've picked you for like a naked person
709
00:45:29,400 --> 00:45:32,600
definitely not a naked person kidding i don't even let my cats
710
00:45:32,600 --> 00:45:33,400
do me naked
711
00:45:34,200 --> 00:45:36,066
really that's weird
712
00:45:48,333 --> 00:45:50,733
oh that's glitter from school we were doing collages
713
00:45:50,733 --> 00:45:51,533
yesterday
714
00:45:52,200 --> 00:45:53,366
with feathers and
715
00:45:54,200 --> 00:45:55,000
blue and
716
00:46:03,100 --> 00:46:07,266
so i thought there's no way she's here today so
717
00:46:08,000 --> 00:46:09,866
i was gonna swing by you know but
718
00:46:16,300 --> 00:46:17,100
so
719
00:46:17,500 --> 00:46:18,766
where's your friend
720
00:46:20,533 --> 00:46:22,966
oh yeah well
721
00:46:23,200 --> 00:46:25,333
i think i told her that you were really depressed
722
00:46:25,666 --> 00:46:26,933
why would you do that
723
00:46:27,566 --> 00:46:30,099
so i could come and talk to you oh my god
724
00:46:30,800 --> 00:46:33,133
would you ever just tell the truth oh
725
00:46:33,133 --> 00:46:34,199
would it make me a better person
726
00:46:34,200 --> 00:46:35,466
if i was to say to her you know
727
00:46:35,466 --> 00:46:37,066
i'd really like to blow you off because there's a woman here
728
00:46:37,066 --> 00:46:38,066
i'm falling in love way i think
729
00:46:38,066 --> 00:46:39,133
you just find your own right home
730
00:46:39,133 --> 00:46:41,566
and wait what did you just say
731
00:46:42,133 --> 00:46:45,299
why don't you just find your own way home no the other thing
732
00:46:46,533 --> 00:46:47,999
they're falling in love with you
733
00:46:48,366 --> 00:46:52,199
you are not i am too are not i am too are not
734
00:46:52,466 --> 00:46:54,499
i am too okay
735
00:46:54,733 --> 00:46:56,733
so if you're falling in love with me
736
00:46:56,733 --> 00:46:58,299
why are you with all these other women
737
00:46:58,566 --> 00:46:59,366
oh come on
738
00:47:00,466 --> 00:47:01,899
am i supposed to remain celibate
739
00:47:01,900 --> 00:47:04,966
while i bask in like the warm glow of your annihilating contempt
740
00:47:05,133 --> 00:47:08,199
am i supposed to find solace in that you know no
741
00:47:08,200 --> 00:47:11,500
you're right forget it that was stupid just forget it
742
00:47:12,066 --> 00:47:13,933
what are you are you mad
743
00:47:18,966 --> 00:47:20,866
said come on
744
00:47:21,600 --> 00:47:22,666
you're joking
745
00:47:24,666 --> 00:47:25,899
why are you mad at me
746
00:47:25,900 --> 00:47:29,300
i'm not mad well you sure seem pissed
747
00:47:29,933 --> 00:47:33,366
come on i'm not mad wait a minute
748
00:47:34,133 --> 00:47:34,766
are you pissed off
749
00:47:34,766 --> 00:47:37,566
because i didn't recognize you with the reunion no
750
00:47:38,133 --> 00:47:38,933
okay
751
00:47:40,100 --> 00:47:42,000
was i like a jerk to one of your friends in college
752
00:47:42,000 --> 00:47:42,866
no
753
00:47:43,500 --> 00:47:45,000
was i addict to you in college
754
00:47:46,300 --> 00:47:49,666
not exactly what did we like sleep together and
755
00:47:54,966 --> 00:47:55,766
no
756
00:47:57,700 --> 00:48:00,200
no way there's no way i would have remembered that
757
00:48:03,100 --> 00:48:04,066
but you didn't
758
00:48:08,566 --> 00:48:09,866
pretty romantic isn't it
759
00:48:10,466 --> 00:48:12,099
sid i'm sorry if i hurt you
760
00:48:13,100 --> 00:48:15,366
but i mean for most of college i was so drunk or stoned
761
00:48:15,366 --> 00:48:16,799
i don't even remember half of what happened
762
00:48:16,800 --> 00:48:18,800
i know that's not really a good excuse
763
00:48:19,400 --> 00:48:22,200
but look at me now i'm a fat fucking pig
764
00:48:22,733 --> 00:48:25,566
and the guy that did that to you was a skinny arrogant prick
765
00:48:26,000 --> 00:48:27,466
just give me one more chance
766
00:48:31,666 --> 00:48:33,066
you should go back to your date
767
00:49:04,533 --> 00:49:05,333
what
768
00:49:16,933 --> 00:49:18,533
stop looking at me like that
769
00:49:20,766 --> 00:49:22,966
you're acting like a codependent girlfriend
770
00:49:35,933 --> 00:49:37,333
right that's the last time
771
00:49:52,666 --> 00:49:53,466
what's up
772
00:49:54,566 --> 00:49:56,866
i just wanted to tell you that i'm not gonna do your stupid
773
00:49:57,100 --> 00:49:58,733
dow of steve thing anymore
774
00:49:59,566 --> 00:50:00,366
okay
775
00:50:01,900 --> 00:50:03,333
just that it's you know it's
776
00:50:03,900 --> 00:50:08,466
it's bony dishonest and it's not me you know oh really
777
00:50:08,800 --> 00:50:09,133
you think
778
00:50:09,133 --> 00:50:11,066
it's more honest to pretend to listen to a woman
779
00:50:11,066 --> 00:50:12,566
when you're just thinking about getting laid
780
00:50:12,566 --> 00:50:14,299
i i think it's more honest than
781
00:50:14,300 --> 00:50:16,133
pretending i don't want to get laid you know
782
00:50:16,133 --> 00:50:17,133
that's the whole point
783
00:50:17,133 --> 00:50:20,366
don't pretend man just really let go of your desire
784
00:50:21,100 --> 00:50:22,466
okay look
785
00:50:23,266 --> 00:50:26,533
if i like a woman i'm not gonna pretend that i don't like her
786
00:50:26,566 --> 00:50:27,366
i'm not gonna
787
00:50:27,500 --> 00:50:28,700
pretend to be
788
00:50:28,933 --> 00:50:31,866
excellent i'm not gonna pretend to retreat
789
00:50:31,966 --> 00:50:33,199
i'm just gonna be me
790
00:50:33,200 --> 00:50:34,900
you know i'm just gonna go in there and be honest
791
00:50:34,900 --> 00:50:35,733
and i'm gonna be me
792
00:50:35,733 --> 00:50:37,899
that's exactly what i want you to be i want you to be honest
793
00:50:37,900 --> 00:50:38,733
i want you to be you
794
00:50:38,733 --> 00:50:40,366
but i want you to be the real you
795
00:50:40,900 --> 00:50:44,066
you are so full of it man not so said
796
00:50:44,333 --> 00:50:47,466
okay when the foolish man hears of the doubt you know he does
797
00:50:47,533 --> 00:50:49,733
what's that man he laughs out loud
798
00:50:50,000 --> 00:50:52,800
i swear you just make this stuff up as you go along right
799
00:50:54,933 --> 00:50:56,866
okay okay so you didn't make it up
800
00:50:57,766 --> 00:50:59,366
you know what man you should read these
801
00:50:59,700 --> 00:51:01,133
now you're gonna give me homework
802
00:51:01,266 --> 00:51:02,933
no i'm trying to share knowledge
803
00:51:03,800 --> 00:51:05,766
look i really appreciate your help
804
00:51:05,766 --> 00:51:07,799
it's just this is all a little too hard
805
00:51:07,800 --> 00:51:09,200
okay what is too hard
806
00:51:09,200 --> 00:51:11,266
okay not coming on to women
807
00:51:11,266 --> 00:51:12,933
all right trying to be an excellent human being
808
00:51:12,966 --> 00:51:15,199
the buddha all right he left his family
809
00:51:15,200 --> 00:51:18,300
his fortune his place in society i mean this guy was set
810
00:51:18,300 --> 00:51:21,266
and he wandered down the road of enlightenment that's hard
811
00:51:22,933 --> 00:51:24,666
i'm not looking for enlightenment dex
812
00:51:24,666 --> 00:51:26,666
i'm looking for a girlfriend that's it
813
00:51:27,166 --> 00:51:28,366
it's all connected
814
00:52:14,200 --> 00:52:15,666
i know what you're trying to do
815
00:52:16,466 --> 00:52:17,466
what are you talking about
816
00:52:17,766 --> 00:52:21,099
just because you fixed my bike i'm not gonna go out with you hey
817
00:52:21,400 --> 00:52:23,700
i just wanted to say that i was sorry
818
00:52:24,100 --> 00:52:25,400
are you sure that's all you wanted
819
00:52:27,000 --> 00:52:27,800
you know this is
820
00:52:29,100 --> 00:52:32,133
let's forget about it okay just forget about the whole thing
821
00:52:32,966 --> 00:52:34,899
yeah i guess forgetting is what you're good at
822
00:52:39,500 --> 00:52:41,933
oh my god i just hurt your feelings no
823
00:52:41,933 --> 00:52:42,999
you didn't i mean apparently
824
00:52:43,000 --> 00:52:44,966
i don't have feelings so how could they be hurt
825
00:52:44,966 --> 00:52:45,733
i'm sorry
826
00:52:45,733 --> 00:52:48,766
i just assume everything you do has an ulterior motive oh
827
00:52:48,766 --> 00:52:51,666
that that that makes me feel really good okay
828
00:52:52,066 --> 00:52:54,933
uh i'm sorry that was terrible i
829
00:52:56,300 --> 00:52:57,900
look thank you for fixing my leg
830
00:52:58,266 --> 00:52:59,066
you're welcome
831
00:52:59,400 --> 00:53:00,200
you're welcome
832
00:53:15,166 --> 00:53:16,866
hey we're going camping tomorrow
833
00:53:17,500 --> 00:53:19,066
i don't suppose that you want to come
834
00:53:25,566 --> 00:53:27,266
i'll be walking yeah
835
00:53:29,600 --> 00:53:31,700
can you climb me i know
836
00:53:33,966 --> 00:53:36,066
outdoors shut the fuck up
837
00:53:36,600 --> 00:53:37,900
are you sure you want to do this
838
00:53:38,466 --> 00:53:39,266
yeah
839
00:53:40,133 --> 00:53:42,099
i love camping always
840
00:53:48,066 --> 00:53:50,933
and i never step put inside
841
00:53:53,200 --> 00:53:54,900
it will finally
842
00:54:25,066 --> 00:54:26,066
are you okay
843
00:54:26,900 --> 00:54:29,466
yeah yeah i just stopped to
844
00:54:30,100 --> 00:54:31,266
check out this conference
845
00:54:39,000 --> 00:54:42,400
just as well i'm not invited i'm
846
00:55:02,366 --> 00:55:03,999
so what's the deal with you and that
847
00:55:05,900 --> 00:55:08,133
no deal you know we're just friends
848
00:55:09,266 --> 00:55:10,899
i thought i sent something
849
00:55:11,966 --> 00:55:12,933
as a party
850
00:55:14,066 --> 00:55:16,333
oh no she was tense because
851
00:55:17,266 --> 00:55:19,166
she got that puppy and
852
00:55:20,700 --> 00:55:22,333
she went to the pound and got this puppy
853
00:55:22,333 --> 00:55:24,066
and it's not a dog person and you know
854
00:55:24,066 --> 00:55:25,299
women like to save things
855
00:55:25,300 --> 00:55:27,066
men like to draw boundaries and
856
00:55:27,500 --> 00:55:28,866
you know it's like molly brown
857
00:55:28,866 --> 00:55:31,499
the titanic you know she was saying more people more people
858
00:55:31,500 --> 00:55:33,133
but the boat guy was like no
859
00:55:33,533 --> 00:55:36,366
you know it's just like puppies you know
860
00:55:47,666 --> 00:55:49,366
i was just totally lying back there
861
00:55:49,800 --> 00:55:51,500
both guys do you like puppies well
862
00:55:51,500 --> 00:55:52,800
i mean i'm sure some do but
863
00:55:53,066 --> 00:55:55,099
about me and beth just being friends
864
00:55:55,766 --> 00:55:59,766
you know it i can't believe you saw me all that puppy bullshit
865
00:56:00,100 --> 00:56:03,600
yeah but i just admitted i was lying you want points for that
866
00:56:04,133 --> 00:56:05,966
besides isn't she married well
867
00:56:05,966 --> 00:56:08,566
yeah but depends on your definition of married
868
00:56:10,100 --> 00:56:10,400
you know
869
00:56:10,400 --> 00:56:13,666
i don't have a lot of hang ups but venagamy is one of them
870
00:56:23,366 --> 00:56:24,333
hey you know
871
00:56:25,066 --> 00:56:26,999
do you think we ought to leave a trail of red crumbs
872
00:56:27,400 --> 00:56:28,500
that'll be fine max
873
00:56:45,266 --> 00:56:46,733
what took you so long
874
00:57:30,500 --> 00:57:32,300
i feel so at home in nature
875
00:57:34,900 --> 00:57:36,200
never again
876
00:57:49,733 --> 00:57:50,699
do you guys ever worry
877
00:57:50,700 --> 00:57:54,300
your marriage is an obstacle to your reaching enlightenment
878
00:57:57,266 --> 00:57:57,933
do you ever wonder
879
00:57:57,933 --> 00:58:00,933
if your philosophy is an obstacle to having a life
880
00:58:01,366 --> 00:58:04,499
seriously man because romantic love for a lot of people becomes
881
00:58:04,600 --> 00:58:05,866
kind of a religion
882
00:58:06,266 --> 00:58:07,899
you know face it most people
883
00:58:08,200 --> 00:58:09,666
feel that their personal relationships are
884
00:58:09,666 --> 00:58:11,366
more important than their relationship with god
885
00:58:11,366 --> 00:58:12,933
and we should just admit that romantic
886
00:58:12,933 --> 00:58:14,266
love is our national religion
887
00:58:14,266 --> 00:58:15,699
it's like the state religion
888
00:58:15,766 --> 00:58:18,999
of america let me take you guys for example okay
889
00:58:19,866 --> 00:58:21,366
okay no judgment but
890
00:58:22,166 --> 00:58:25,166
like what's more important to you your relationship with god
891
00:58:25,166 --> 00:58:26,166
or with each other
892
00:58:30,666 --> 00:58:31,266
seriously
893
00:58:31,266 --> 00:58:34,699
i mean think about god right now who is snuggling up with god
894
00:58:35,166 --> 00:58:36,566
who does he partner with
895
00:58:36,900 --> 00:58:38,933
who is putting their head on his shoulder
896
00:58:39,600 --> 00:58:42,300
i i think he's like the loneliest dude in the universe
897
00:58:42,300 --> 00:58:43,900
why would god be lonely millions of people
898
00:58:43,900 --> 00:58:45,000
predict got all the time
899
00:58:45,366 --> 00:58:47,699
that's other gratitude or grobling you know like hey
900
00:58:47,700 --> 00:58:50,066
god could you help me win the lotto or god
901
00:58:50,066 --> 00:58:51,466
if you get me out of this situation
902
00:58:51,466 --> 00:58:55,499
man i'll go to church forever you know no one ever says hey
903
00:58:55,500 --> 00:58:57,333
god how was your day
904
00:58:57,366 --> 00:58:59,299
what can i do for you god
905
00:58:59,333 --> 00:59:02,099
or hey god did you cash letterman last night oh
906
00:59:02,100 --> 00:59:05,600
and i suppose you talk to god like that always all the time
907
00:59:06,000 --> 00:59:06,933
what does god say
908
00:59:06,933 --> 00:59:09,499
he said you know what i saw letterman and it sucked
909
00:59:22,533 --> 00:59:23,699
goodnight rack
910
00:59:26,066 --> 00:59:27,499
goodnight ducks
911
00:59:29,466 --> 00:59:30,666
good night maggie
912
00:59:32,100 --> 00:59:33,866
good night john boy
913
00:59:35,466 --> 00:59:39,799
good night sid oh my god do you ever stop talking
914
01:00:12,266 --> 01:00:13,199
oh damn it
915
01:00:13,866 --> 01:00:14,933
it was a spider
916
01:00:15,466 --> 01:00:16,399
there was a big
917
01:00:17,066 --> 01:00:19,599
sweater it was a big hairy spider
918
01:00:20,200 --> 01:00:22,333
my tent oh
919
01:00:30,733 --> 01:00:31,766
what are you looking at
920
01:00:34,800 --> 01:00:36,866
no no way
921
01:00:44,700 --> 01:00:48,400
if any part of you touches any part of me i have a knife
922
01:00:49,600 --> 01:00:50,300
listen
923
01:00:50,300 --> 01:00:53,133
okay apparently we've been in this position before so we might
924
01:00:53,666 --> 01:00:55,966
you cannot talk about that thing
925
01:00:56,400 --> 01:00:59,800
that you have no memory of okay okay okay
926
01:01:00,066 --> 01:01:02,766
message received zero distortion
927
01:01:11,100 --> 01:01:12,733
so this is camping
928
01:01:12,766 --> 01:01:13,699
hey i'm trying
929
01:01:13,700 --> 01:01:15,133
to pretend that you're not here
930
01:01:15,300 --> 01:01:18,133
why are you so mad you lied about the spider
931
01:01:18,133 --> 01:01:20,466
you lied about the puppy thing and you're having an affair
932
01:01:20,466 --> 01:01:22,466
i did not lie about the spider did too
933
01:01:22,466 --> 01:01:24,533
i did not i did not
934
01:01:25,866 --> 01:01:27,899
oh you couldn't think of a better lie
935
01:01:28,800 --> 01:01:30,666
why in the world would i lie about a spider
936
01:01:30,933 --> 01:01:34,999
you lied about the spider so you could get in my tent so
937
01:01:35,766 --> 01:01:38,799
so what so you could
938
01:01:39,300 --> 01:01:41,200
they'll make a move vomit
939
01:01:43,866 --> 01:01:46,799
you're such a self aggrandizing solar
940
01:01:46,800 --> 01:01:49,366
cystic ego quaint you don't even know you're
941
01:01:49,600 --> 01:01:50,966
just a cystic
942
01:01:52,066 --> 01:01:54,999
i'm well certainly done i thought that worried i did too
943
01:01:58,200 --> 01:01:59,366
don't even think about it
944
01:02:24,466 --> 01:02:25,266
thanks
945
01:02:38,566 --> 01:02:40,599
are you okay yeah
946
01:02:41,066 --> 01:02:43,366
yeah i'm alright i think sure all right yeah
947
01:02:43,766 --> 01:02:45,266
yeah i'm okay
948
01:02:46,066 --> 01:02:47,733
all right yeah wait oh
949
01:02:49,966 --> 01:02:52,733
i think i'm happy no more attack is this a trick
950
01:02:53,566 --> 01:02:55,933
trick yeah like the spider in your town
951
01:02:57,133 --> 01:02:58,966
there was a spider in my tent
952
01:03:03,000 --> 01:03:03,800
maggie
953
01:03:09,566 --> 01:03:13,333
okay you didn't have a heart attack good
954
01:03:14,166 --> 01:03:18,199
but you do suffer from gastrosophageal reflux disease
955
01:03:19,266 --> 01:03:20,066
whoa
956
01:03:20,533 --> 01:03:23,099
otherwise known as heartburn
957
01:03:24,533 --> 01:03:25,599
that's it oh
958
01:03:25,600 --> 01:03:28,133
that's cool so i could just you know changing
959
01:03:28,133 --> 01:03:30,599
no no no no it's not cool it's not great
960
01:03:31,566 --> 01:03:35,066
why do i have a tumor or something no you don't have a tumor
961
01:03:35,700 --> 01:03:36,900
but you're obese
962
01:03:37,133 --> 01:03:38,933
it's a very serious risk factor for high
963
01:03:38,933 --> 01:03:41,666
blood pressure heart disease diabetes well
964
01:03:41,666 --> 01:03:44,199
please be candid you smoke
965
01:03:44,700 --> 01:03:46,066
uh you know i'll have
966
01:03:46,066 --> 01:03:50,266
the occasional packaday or so yeah these are serious problems
967
01:03:50,533 --> 01:03:53,366
you've got to quit smoking you've got to go on a diet
968
01:03:53,966 --> 01:03:55,499
oh well that's easy look
969
01:03:55,500 --> 01:03:58,066
i didn't say that changing your life would be easy
970
01:03:58,800 --> 01:04:00,400
but your life does depend upon it
971
01:04:04,333 --> 01:04:05,133
thank you
972
01:04:14,100 --> 01:04:17,100
guy you're not gonna lose weight eating peanut butter
973
01:04:17,100 --> 01:04:19,666
sandwiches if you're talking about its whole wheat bread
974
01:04:19,733 --> 01:04:21,133
it's peanut butter
975
01:04:21,800 --> 01:04:23,933
i lost twenty five pounds on my pizza diet
976
01:04:23,933 --> 01:04:25,299
this is gonna be much easier
977
01:04:25,366 --> 01:04:27,066
why more protein
978
01:04:28,866 --> 01:04:31,466
it's almost as ridiculous as your sleeping diet
979
01:04:31,700 --> 01:04:34,800
that time i lost thirty pounds it also lost your job
980
01:04:35,066 --> 01:04:36,399
the diet work or not
981
01:04:38,866 --> 01:04:39,733
hey beth
982
01:04:41,400 --> 01:04:42,500
yeah yeah i'm good
983
01:04:44,066 --> 01:04:44,999
hey let's not
984
01:04:46,200 --> 01:04:48,966
i don't think it's a good idea that we see each other anymore
985
01:04:51,466 --> 01:04:54,966
just just tell me why hello you're married okay
986
01:04:55,100 --> 01:04:55,866
you are married
987
01:04:55,866 --> 01:04:57,599
and i just want to have a relationship with the first time
988
01:04:57,600 --> 01:04:58,533
dating is dating
989
01:04:58,533 --> 01:04:59,533
me just for me
990
01:04:59,533 --> 01:05:01,766
and there's no marriage involved in neither of us
991
01:05:01,800 --> 01:05:03,800
married that's all you're right you're right
992
01:05:03,800 --> 01:05:07,200
absolutely right this is all wrong right yeah
993
01:05:07,600 --> 01:05:09,966
uh can you slow down a little please ha
994
01:05:10,133 --> 01:05:10,966
if i left ed
995
01:05:11,966 --> 01:05:13,533
you could have a normal relationship
996
01:05:13,533 --> 01:05:16,766
we could never have a normal relationship beth why not
997
01:05:18,700 --> 01:05:20,900
sid isn't it sid who
998
01:05:21,933 --> 01:05:22,933
go to hell
999
01:05:27,600 --> 01:05:28,866
does this side have an airbag
1000
01:05:35,700 --> 01:05:36,566
asshole
1001
01:05:40,366 --> 01:05:41,166
don't ask
1002
01:05:57,933 --> 01:05:58,733
hey guys
1003
01:05:58,866 --> 01:06:01,466
i'm going out with that chipper kinkles for drinks that i have
1004
01:06:01,466 --> 01:06:01,966
had it and
1005
01:06:01,966 --> 01:06:05,133
i know i know i've got to not have sex with her no
1006
01:06:05,133 --> 01:06:07,399
no man you got to not want to have sex with her
1007
01:06:07,466 --> 01:06:08,566
having sex with her
1008
01:06:08,900 --> 01:06:10,100
the whole point okay
1009
01:06:10,133 --> 01:06:13,199
i've got to not want to have sex with her right right
1010
01:06:13,200 --> 01:06:14,300
right remember okay
1011
01:06:14,300 --> 01:06:15,400
both men and women
1012
01:06:15,533 --> 01:06:17,266
want to have sex it's natural except
1013
01:06:17,266 --> 01:06:19,299
we're on different time tables women want to have sex
1014
01:06:19,300 --> 01:06:22,133
like you know fifteen minutes after us so
1015
01:06:22,333 --> 01:06:23,899
alright if you hold out for twenty
1016
01:06:23,900 --> 01:06:25,533
she'll be chasing you for five
1017
01:06:25,666 --> 01:06:27,566
i don't know if i can hold out for that long
1018
01:06:29,766 --> 01:06:32,099
you got to ask yourself man do you want to be a stew
1019
01:06:32,366 --> 01:06:33,766
or do you want to be a steve
1020
01:06:48,100 --> 01:06:51,133
oh cynthia
1021
01:06:54,333 --> 01:06:55,666
how was your day starting high
1022
01:06:59,333 --> 01:07:00,133
and
1023
01:07:01,333 --> 01:07:02,133
hey dex
1024
01:07:02,966 --> 01:07:03,766
what's up
1025
01:07:40,333 --> 01:07:42,466
what is it it's it
1026
01:07:47,200 --> 01:07:48,333
what do you want
1027
01:07:48,733 --> 01:07:50,533
i wanted to see how you were feeling
1028
01:07:50,666 --> 01:07:52,799
oh i'm fine thank you i'm great
1029
01:07:53,900 --> 01:07:55,366
do you need anything
1030
01:07:56,100 --> 01:07:57,500
no no i'm okay
1031
01:07:58,333 --> 01:08:00,599
look this is ridiculous can i just come in
1032
01:08:07,000 --> 01:08:09,966
okay all right great come on in fine
1033
01:08:12,866 --> 01:08:14,366
oh my god are you okay
1034
01:08:18,800 --> 01:08:19,600
all right
1035
01:08:20,066 --> 01:08:24,166
you know i'd rather not talk about it really fine fine
1036
01:08:26,266 --> 01:08:27,533
did somebody hit you
1037
01:08:29,066 --> 01:08:30,999
yes yes okay
1038
01:08:33,400 --> 01:08:35,666
someone hit me ed hit me all right
1039
01:08:35,733 --> 01:08:37,866
ed hit me you happy
1040
01:08:38,300 --> 01:08:41,166
no i'm really sorry that it happened oh
1041
01:08:41,166 --> 01:08:43,066
really i thought you'd be really happy you know
1042
01:08:43,066 --> 01:08:44,299
because god's punishing me
1043
01:08:44,300 --> 01:08:45,800
i don't want god to punish you
1044
01:08:46,966 --> 01:08:47,766
okay
1045
01:08:49,000 --> 01:08:50,366
i want to punish you
1046
01:08:54,466 --> 01:08:58,166
just kidding i really am sorry it's okay
1047
01:09:12,866 --> 01:09:14,766
did you just kiss my boo boo
1048
01:09:15,933 --> 01:09:16,899
did i help
1049
01:09:17,800 --> 01:09:20,700
a little you might have to do it again
1050
01:09:49,400 --> 01:09:53,866
just like a bullet to your side i wanna be
1051
01:09:56,200 --> 01:09:58,100
man you've ever seen
1052
01:10:06,933 --> 01:10:11,066
just like acquainted with macron with me looking
1053
01:10:12,700 --> 01:10:15,166
that group is filled by picking
1054
01:10:22,800 --> 01:10:23,600
i'm
1055
01:10:24,966 --> 01:10:25,766
gonna come
1056
01:10:26,866 --> 01:10:30,466
unless you forget i'm just say not a nudity kind of person
1057
01:10:30,466 --> 01:10:33,666
that's cool because i got a non nudity kind of idea
1058
01:11:05,400 --> 01:11:07,100
you know what this total reminds me of
1059
01:11:15,866 --> 01:11:17,566
one time what what
1060
01:11:33,266 --> 01:11:34,733
oh whoa whoa whoa
1061
01:11:35,333 --> 01:11:37,666
whoa speed racer
1062
01:11:41,133 --> 01:11:44,599
you know eventually you're gonna have to take your clothes off
1063
01:11:46,400 --> 01:11:49,666
i know i'm grappling with that moment
1064
01:12:05,766 --> 01:12:06,733
is it okay
1065
01:12:08,600 --> 01:12:09,400
nice
1066
01:13:04,200 --> 01:13:09,400
dex
1067
01:13:13,166 --> 01:13:13,966
dex
1068
01:13:17,366 --> 01:13:19,066
oh god oh
1069
01:13:20,166 --> 01:13:21,499
did i drill or something
1070
01:13:23,366 --> 01:13:26,199
thanks oh good not that i drill
1071
01:13:26,766 --> 01:13:28,133
or anything i just um
1072
01:13:31,000 --> 01:13:31,800
hey
1073
01:13:36,000 --> 01:13:38,300
do you want coffee or cocoa puffs or anything
1074
01:13:38,566 --> 01:13:41,899
i can i can get some i'll make something real quick sure
1075
01:13:58,533 --> 01:13:59,333
hi
1076
01:13:59,966 --> 01:14:00,766
hi
1077
01:14:04,800 --> 01:14:06,566
what's wrong nothing
1078
01:14:09,300 --> 01:14:11,766
i was just thinking about
1079
01:14:13,500 --> 01:14:15,300
well i'm supposed to live in three days
1080
01:14:15,800 --> 01:14:17,900
yeah you knew i was leaving right
1081
01:14:19,533 --> 01:14:21,333
you know i guess i kind of repressed it
1082
01:14:22,466 --> 01:14:23,266
oh
1083
01:14:24,500 --> 01:14:25,300
okay
1084
01:14:26,000 --> 01:14:26,800
well
1085
01:14:26,800 --> 01:14:29,400
you know maybe you can stay in town for a little while longer i
1086
01:14:29,900 --> 01:14:31,766
i can't have got another job in new york
1087
01:14:33,500 --> 01:14:34,766
maybe you could come to new york
1088
01:14:46,066 --> 01:14:47,866
hey dex this is julie
1089
01:14:48,133 --> 01:14:52,199
what's up i haven't heard from you in a while and hey hey you
1090
01:14:53,100 --> 01:14:54,133
how's it going yeah
1091
01:14:54,133 --> 01:14:56,799
sorry sorry about that i've been real busy lately
1092
01:14:57,300 --> 01:14:59,400
no i mean not too busy for you
1093
01:15:00,133 --> 01:15:01,699
i know i said i yeah
1094
01:15:01,900 --> 01:15:05,666
i did i did i meant to i mean i meant it at the time but i
1095
01:15:06,066 --> 01:15:07,766
know it's not like i don't mean that i mean
1096
01:15:09,166 --> 01:15:12,199
it's just it's just sort of complicated and i can't really
1097
01:15:13,100 --> 01:15:18,766
explain i mean i wish i know hey no way i'm a dallas
1098
01:15:19,466 --> 01:15:22,099
what i've got to go i'll call you back later okay
1099
01:15:22,500 --> 01:15:24,566
you look mad it totally works
1100
01:15:25,000 --> 01:15:26,700
can we have breakfast somewhere else you want to
1101
01:15:27,333 --> 01:15:30,533
what works the dow steve dex's rules for picking up chicks
1102
01:15:30,933 --> 01:15:33,199
dex's rules for picking up chicks yeah
1103
01:15:33,200 --> 01:15:35,600
i made a little cheese so i wouldn't forget this
1104
01:15:35,600 --> 01:15:36,566
i gotta hear
1105
01:15:37,666 --> 01:15:38,533
oh god
1106
01:15:40,366 --> 01:15:41,533
be desireless
1107
01:15:41,933 --> 01:15:44,399
be excellent and be god
1108
01:15:54,666 --> 01:15:57,866
so do you have different rules for different women
1109
01:16:00,266 --> 01:16:03,966
are you still thinking about that no what
1110
01:16:06,966 --> 01:16:08,899
so does that mean
1111
01:16:09,200 --> 01:16:10,400
women are all the same
1112
01:16:11,133 --> 01:16:11,966
uh no
1113
01:16:12,733 --> 01:16:13,399
this whole thing is like
1114
01:16:13,400 --> 01:16:16,466
it's a universal max and kind of for behavior friend
1115
01:16:16,466 --> 01:16:17,299
it's you know
1116
01:16:18,366 --> 01:16:21,466
next hey hi hey
1117
01:16:22,900 --> 01:16:23,700
how you doing
1118
01:16:24,566 --> 01:16:25,933
sid this is
1119
01:16:27,333 --> 01:16:29,199
cindy kelly
1120
01:16:29,933 --> 01:16:30,733
kelly
1121
01:16:32,333 --> 01:16:34,299
sid kelly kelly sid hi
1122
01:16:35,133 --> 01:16:35,933
hi
1123
01:16:36,400 --> 01:16:37,200
so
1124
01:16:37,733 --> 01:16:40,466
you guys ready to order oh i'm just in a sec
1125
01:16:40,933 --> 01:16:42,366
what's the special of the day
1126
01:16:44,466 --> 01:16:45,266
just like
1127
01:16:51,666 --> 01:16:52,566
oh my god
1128
01:16:53,300 --> 01:16:54,933
i'm the special of the day
1129
01:16:55,500 --> 01:16:56,133
what are you talking about
1130
01:16:56,133 --> 01:16:58,533
are you wavos french heroes or something
1131
01:16:59,400 --> 01:17:00,200
well
1132
01:17:00,666 --> 01:17:01,999
what makes me different
1133
01:17:03,000 --> 01:17:04,700
i mean what makes me different
1134
01:17:04,700 --> 01:17:06,566
from any other woman that you've been with
1135
01:17:07,066 --> 01:17:08,999
lots of things everything um
1136
01:17:10,133 --> 01:17:11,333
why should i believe you
1137
01:17:11,733 --> 01:17:13,766
why i don't know why
1138
01:17:13,766 --> 01:17:15,733
why shouldn't you i mean fine don't you know what
1139
01:17:15,800 --> 01:17:16,666
don't believe me
1140
01:17:16,733 --> 01:17:19,299
oh i'm sure you probably tell every woman the same thing
1141
01:17:19,400 --> 01:17:20,400
what oh okay well
1142
01:17:20,400 --> 01:17:22,566
that pretty much limits the what can i say now
1143
01:17:22,566 --> 01:17:24,866
option that i once had you know so i might as well
1144
01:17:24,866 --> 01:17:25,266
you know what
1145
01:17:25,266 --> 01:17:25,933
i'm gonna say
1146
01:17:25,933 --> 01:17:28,566
or you already assigned it this kind of
1147
01:17:32,700 --> 01:17:35,333
you know the actions speak louder than works
1148
01:17:36,533 --> 01:17:38,199
what does that mean i mean what is
1149
01:17:38,700 --> 01:17:39,666
that supposed to mean
1150
01:17:41,466 --> 01:17:43,466
it means there's nothing you can say
1151
01:17:49,600 --> 01:17:50,400
why
1152
01:17:57,300 --> 01:17:58,600
this is the words
1153
01:17:59,333 --> 01:18:00,499
it hurts so good
1154
01:18:01,400 --> 01:18:02,966
and our asses all night monter
1155
01:18:02,966 --> 01:18:05,866
he's not a friggin'roll you guys have no idea
1156
01:18:06,966 --> 01:18:09,533
all right dude we'll have nothing
1157
01:18:10,933 --> 01:18:12,366
i think goldman got laid
1158
01:18:13,366 --> 01:18:15,533
prize this is a fucking card game where goddamn sewing circle
1159
01:18:15,533 --> 01:18:16,299
let's go oh
1160
01:18:16,300 --> 01:18:17,333
leave your chuts
1161
01:18:18,066 --> 01:18:19,066
it's your problem
1162
01:18:20,066 --> 01:18:21,099
shit left today
1163
01:18:21,766 --> 01:18:22,566
oh
1164
01:18:23,800 --> 01:18:27,000
hey uh i did a lot to say say something like
1165
01:18:27,200 --> 01:18:29,666
if you're attached to nothing you lose nothing
1166
01:18:30,000 --> 01:18:31,266
why don't you give it a rest
1167
01:18:35,300 --> 01:18:36,133
five drop
1168
01:19:03,700 --> 01:19:04,766
i left it
1169
01:19:06,800 --> 01:19:07,600
i see
1170
01:19:24,700 --> 01:19:27,366
i can't i can't i can't i just
1171
01:19:29,266 --> 01:19:31,533
i can't i can't i can't do this anymore
1172
01:19:43,533 --> 01:19:44,933
hey what's up that
1173
01:20:05,933 --> 01:20:08,599
hey
1174
01:20:09,466 --> 01:20:12,766
what's up what are you looking for jamie beer oh
1175
01:20:12,766 --> 01:20:14,133
check the little vegetable thing
1176
01:20:17,466 --> 01:20:22,333
hey so is beth upset about something she left her husband oh
1177
01:20:37,666 --> 01:20:38,466
what
1178
01:20:44,200 --> 01:20:46,200
i was wondering if i could have her number
1179
01:20:46,966 --> 01:20:47,766
whose number
1180
01:20:48,533 --> 01:20:49,333
that's
1181
01:20:50,733 --> 01:20:51,766
are you joking
1182
01:20:55,266 --> 01:20:56,066
uh
1183
01:20:56,600 --> 01:20:58,366
yeah i'm sorry bro
1184
01:20:59,066 --> 01:20:59,933
i'm sorry
1185
01:21:15,200 --> 01:21:17,300
hey hey what's up
1186
01:21:17,500 --> 01:21:20,100
you know all that stuff i've been telling you yeah
1187
01:21:20,500 --> 01:21:24,100
forget it the dow of steve isn't about picking up lots of women
1188
01:21:24,500 --> 01:21:27,866
it's about being the best person you can be and i'm not
1189
01:21:28,733 --> 01:21:30,133
what are you talking about
1190
01:21:30,266 --> 01:21:31,666
i've been trying to turn you into me
1191
01:21:31,666 --> 01:21:33,899
and i'm not sure i even wanna be me anymore
1192
01:22:14,900 --> 01:22:15,933
hey dex
1193
01:22:15,933 --> 01:22:20,133
it's it i'm just called from new york to say hi
1194
01:22:20,766 --> 01:22:21,566
and
1195
01:22:22,133 --> 01:22:25,799
actually i'm not calling to say hi i'm calling because
1196
01:22:26,066 --> 01:22:28,133
you know that thing that happened in college
1197
01:22:28,466 --> 01:22:30,499
i just left it hanging for ten years
1198
01:22:30,733 --> 01:22:31,799
and the thing is
1199
01:22:31,866 --> 01:22:34,899
i don't want to leave what happened the other day hanging
1200
01:22:35,166 --> 01:22:36,499
so unresolved
1201
01:22:36,766 --> 01:22:38,933
and everything so um
1202
01:22:41,866 --> 01:22:44,333
so anyway i just i don't know
1203
01:22:45,366 --> 01:22:46,266
we should talk
1204
01:22:49,800 --> 01:22:54,866
sorry sorry sorry
1205
01:22:59,300 --> 01:23:00,100
just um
1206
01:23:07,133 --> 01:23:07,999
actually
1207
01:23:09,100 --> 01:23:09,900
never mind
87467
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