All language subtitles for aldeca

* I'm a sentimental sap
that's all

* What's the use
of trying not to fall?

* I have no will
You made your kill

* 'Cause you took
advantage of me

* I'm just like an apple
on a bough

* And you're going to
shake me down somehow

* But what's the use?
You cooked my goose

* 'Cause you took
advantage of me

* I'm so hot and bothered

* That I don't know
my elbow from my ear

* I suffer something awful
each time you go

* It's much worse
when you're near

* Here am I
with all my bridges burned

* Just a babe in arms
where you're concerned

* So lock the doors
and call me yours

* 'Cause you took
advantage of me

* I have no will

* You've made your kill

* 'Cause you took
advantage of me

* So lock the doors

* And call me yours

* You took advantage

* Of poor little me

MAN ON RADIO:
Crossbow,
this is Watchdog.

Confirm all
transmissions
on discriminator.

MAN 2:
Roger, Watchdog.

Crossbow is
on discriminator.

And all systems
are "go."

Roger, we mark you "go"
for maneuvering sequence.

MAN 2: Watchdog,
this is Crossbow.

I am established.
Confirm we are "go" for "arm."

MAN: Affirmative, Crossbow.

At this time,
select electrics to "max."
Select vents to "open."

And select systems
to "onboard."

MAN 2:
Roger, Crossbow is armed.

MAN: Roger. We now have
ground confirmation.
Rabbit is in the hole.

Moving target indicator
engaged. Pathfinder is on.
I'm going on the scope.

MAN: Roger.

MAN 2: Scanner on.

Target locked.
Tracking locked.

Roger.
Easy does it.
That's it.

Hold it right there.

MAN 3: The Crossbow Project.
There's no defense
like a good offense.

Mission accomplished.

MAN: Outstanding, Crossbow.

Just like shooting ducks
in a barrel.

MAN 3: Working in secret,
our scientists are turning
an engineering dream,

into an effective reality.

All we have
to do is build it.
Nice weapon, Dave.

What do you think
of the movie, Roy?

I think there weren't
enough girls in it.

I have a tape on
alternate weapon uses.

Plans for the mini-shuttle
and modifications in the B-1
for aerial launching.

Does the President
or any responsible agency
know about this?

We're on a need-to-know
basis, George. The CIA
is a responsible agency.

I think they do need to know.

You're going to
single-handedly cause
a major escalation.

Our studies indicate
this type of weapon
is useless in warfare.

It's not intended
for use in your kind
of warfare, Roy.

It's the perfect
peacetime weapon.
That's why it's secret.

So it's both immoral
and unethical?
DON: Yes.

(ALL LAUGHING)

When do we get it?

As I understand it,
there seems to be
a small technical, uh,

teeny problem
with the energy source...

I don't want to hear
about any problems, Don.

We have plans for
your little ray gun
this summer.

I need a success here.

I don't need any delays
jeopardizing that success.

Am I making myself
clear, Don?
Clear as vodka, Dave.

DECKER: You tell Dr. Hathaway
to get on the stick.

Well, I guess I'm just
gonna have to push
a little harder then, huh?

As long as we have
a working weapon by June.

Right, General?
I wouldn't know, Dave.

I haven't had a working weapon
since Korea.

(ALL LAUGHING)

I'm sorry, Dave.
This is too much.

I gonna have to ask
for a reassignment.

I'm sorry to
hear that, George.

I urge you to stop.
Thanks for your input.

Sorry you won't
be on the team.
Maybe next time.

Too bad.
Used to be a good man.

Afraid we'll have
to liberate George.

Liberate?
You mean liquidate?

Larry, let's see that film
on blinding techniques.

Then, we'll all have
some lunch, all right?

(PEOPLE CHATTERING)

Oh, excuse me.
Would you sign
this, please?

Are you Dr. Hathaway?
Yes, I am.

You know, I just loved
your television show.

Oh, thank you very much.

Listen, tell me.
What is Mr. Einstein
really like?

Dead.

See, Dad, laser means
light amplification

by stimulated emissions
of radiation.

So this is called
"parent light."

Oh, so it talks, right?
No.

(GASPING) Dr. Hathaway!
What a surprise!

How are you,
Mrs. Taylor?

Is something wrong
with Mitch's test scores?

If there is,
it's because I had the flu
and couldn't make him

a decent breakfast
that morning. I tried
to make him waffles.

Well, I thought I'd fly in
and bring you the news myself.

I just got word from
the admissions committee.
We did it.

Mitch is in
to Pacific Tech.

Way to go, boy!
Don't shake his head.

Don't ever shake his head.

How you doing,
Mitch?
Fine.

Nice display here.
Thanks.

It's a flashlamp-pumped
ultraviolet laser
at 342 nanometers.

Well, as you know,
there's considerable interest

in the atomic iodine laser
for fusion.

This is molecular iodine,
therefore, this laser
doesn't suffer

from the problem
of recombination
of atomic iodine.

You must be very proud.

Proud?
Yeah, sure.

Mitch is the first student
we've ever accepted

for midwinter term
at Pacific Tech.

Honey!
I imagine he's
the youngest, too.

Actually,
the youngest
we ever had was 12,

but he cracked
under the pressure
within six months, so...

Mitch is 15.
There's not gonna
be any problem with that.

Say, listen, doc, about
this scholarship thing, now.

You're gonna give him
a signing bonus, right?
No.

But by allowing
Mitch to progress
in an accelerated rate,

we give him the opportunity
to fulfill a far greater
portion

of his remarkable
intellectual potential.

We want the best
for Mitchy.

Dr. Hathaway,
I saw your show the other
night on radioactive isotopes,

and I've got
a question for you.
Yes?

Is that
your real hair?
Yeah.

Tell me, is Mitch
by any chance adopted?

Why, no!
It's amazing.

Isn't it?
If I don't something to eat,
I'm gonna die. Come on.

MRS. TAYLOR:
Bye, Dr. Hathaway.
Goodbye.

I'll see you
later, honey.

They're all right. It's just
sometimes they have no idea
what I'm talking about.

I'm sure about that.

So, tell me, Mitch,
are you going to miss
your friends?

Well, no. I think
I intimidate other kids.
Good boy.

Mitch, there's something
you're going to have
to understand.

Compared to you,
most people have
the IQ of a carrot.

We're different than
most people, Mitch,
better.

WOMAN: Oh, there you are,
Dr. Hathaway!
Hi, one second. One second.

I've decided to put you
on my own research team

with some of the
finest minds on the campus.

This is only the second time
I've given such an honor
to a freshman.

The first one was
Chris Knight in 1981, right?
You've heard of Chris?

Yes, he's a legend in
the National Physics Club.

You're going to be
working with Chris.

He's a senior now.
And he's as brilliant
as he ever was.

(LAUGHING) Wow!

Soon as you graduate,
this job will be
waiting for you, Chris.

CHRIS: Great.

We have a complete physical
plant, right over here.
You have a Jacuzzi?

Absolutely.
Good.

The labs and offices
are over this way.
Follow me, please.

Guys, I want you
to meet Chris Knight.

Chris, this is
my assistant,
Sherry Nugil.

Nice to meet you.
Nice to meet you.

And this is Mike Dodd.
Dr. Dodd.

The one who just
designed our brand-new
telecom satellite.

It's an honor
to meet you, sir.

Telecom.

(SIGHING)
Isn't that the satellite

that's raining debris
all over Europe?

Why is that toy
on your head?

Because, if I wear it
anywhere else, it chafes.

I'm sorry. It's just that
I didn't want you guys
to think I was stuffy.

You know, no fun.
All brain, no penis.

Pardon me?
I'm sorry.

It's an infantile response
to authority.

Yes, you are
Chris Knight,
aren't you?

I hope so.
I'm wearing his underwear.

It's a joke!
I get it! Goody!

I just can't help it!
You guys are such fun
yourselves!

Well, we try to be!
Isn't that right, Mike?

No.

Chris, Sherry is gonna
show you around the place.

You can ask her any questions
you might have
about fringe benefits,

dress codes or whatever.

I'll see you back upstairs
back at my office
when you're through, okay?

Great.
Sherry,

take very good care
of this young man.

He is one of the
ten finest minds
in the country.

Someday I hope
to be two of them.

(LAUGHING)

You are very beautiful.
Thank you.

How did I come off?
Too stuffy?

You certainly don't
act like one of the
top ten minds of America.

Really?
How many of them
have you met?

Seven.
Really?

Mmm-hmm.
You'll be eight.

Professor Hofstetler
at MIT was number six.

Old Professor Hofstetler?
Isn't he dead?

He is now.

Hello, I'm looking
for the president's
freshman tea.

Oh, good.
I'm so glad we
have one, then.

(CHATTERING)

Gene, this is Mitch Taylor.

Ah, Professor Hathaway's
bright star.

Yes, sir.
GENE: And you're already
on his project.

We're told to expect
great things from you.

I hope so, sir.
Oh, a bit of advice.

Oh, thank you?

Always...

No, never...

Forget to check
your references.

Okay. Thank you.

Uh, I'd better be going.

Whoops, sorry.

I think the young people enjoy
it when I "get down" verbally,
don't you?

STUDENT:
Hey, where's the funeral?

* In case you hadn't noticed

* It's a dog eating
dog eating

* Dog eating, dog eating
In case you hadn't noticed *

How you doing, sport?

BOY:
Hey, Bobby, wait up, man.

BOY 2:
Check if he's down
in his room.

He might be in there.

BOY:
Let's go for a bike ride.

Hello?

What kind of a place is this?

Hi. Would you be prepared
if gravity reversed itself?

I... Well...

The only thing I can't figure
out is how to keep the change
in my pockets.

I've got it.
Nudity.

I was here for a second
this morning...

You didn't straighten up
the place, did you?

No.
Good. Because all my filth
is in alphabetical order.

This for example,
was under "H" for toy.

What is that?
This? It's a penis-stretcher.

(WHIRRING)

You want to try it?
No!

I'm kidding.
It's yet another in a long
series of diversions

in an attempt to
avoid responsibility.

I dropped off my luggage
and now all my bags
are empty.

You see, Mitch,
I used to be you.

Lately,
I've been missing me,

so I asked Hathaway
if I could room
with me again.

He said, "Sure."
So, I put all your stuff
in the bottom drawer there.

Shirts, pants, shoes.

I had trouble
with the sports jacket
so I threw it out.

Duck!
Nice reflexes.
I'm Chris Knight.

Oh, no.
Oh, yes.

Duck again!

WOMAN: Hey!

Oh, my God!
It's heading
for the gas tanks.

Duck!

Would you classify that
as a launch problem
or a design problem?

We're falling
way behind, Jerr.

We're not making
cheese sandwiches.

All right, get down!

Hey! What the hell
are you doing? Are you crazy?
You could have killed us!

As one of the deans,
I cannot be seen with you.

I know, Jerr, but since
I'm the one driving,

don't you think you should
be the one to hide?

He saw me.

(SCOFFS)

Jerry, look. The reason
I came here was to tell you
that the climate has changed.

We need a working model
within 4 months, not 18.

You can't dictate
innovation, Don.

Well, let me
put it another way.

You know all the money
we've been spending
on development, Jerr?

Yes.

Well, when a project
gets cut off,

the finance boys
always run an audit.

I see.

Having a little work
done on the old place,
huh, Jerr?

Fraud is a felony.

What are you
looking at?

You're laborers.
You're supposed
to be laboring!

That's what you get
for not having
an education.

(BARKING)

Get out of here!
Go on! Go on!
Get out of here! Get out!

(PEOPLE SHOUTING)

Hey!
Yes?

Just put down
the sandwiches and go.

Me?
No, Yoda!
Yeah, you!

I don't have...
Brains?

(ALL LAUGHING)

No, sandwiches.
Well, then
what good are you?

What are we supposed to eat?

Listen, are you or are you not
from the restaurant?

No, I'm Mitch Taylor.
I'm a student.

Dr. Hathaway told me
to come up here.
Oh.

So, uh, you're
the new stud, are you?

How do you mean?
Stud. Hotshot, brain.

You're 12 years old, right?
I'm 15.

Are you expecting him or...
Yeah, any minute now. Can I
get you something, a balloon?

I'm supposed to
look at your work up-to-date.

Check it over.
Check it over?

Well, yes.
For what?

Mistakes, I guess.
He said you guys
were stuck.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no, no, no.

Let's get something
very clear here, okay?

When Jerry's not here,
you do what I say.

It goes from God
to Jerry to me.
Get it?

Hello, Jerry.

I told you before, Kent,
you don't get to use
my first name.

Did I?
How you doing, Mitch?

Now, I'm sure you're
all gonna become fast friends.

We're well
on our way already.

Good. Because after Mitch
is brought up-to-date,

I want the rest of you
to take your cues from him.

His ideas on efficient
fluorescent compounds are
the most original I've seen.

So, from now on,
Mitch is gonna be in charge
of the group.

KENT: Really, Jerry.

You're doing
it again, Kent.
Oh, am I?

Where is Knight?
Oh, he didn't bother
to come in today.

Yes, Bodie?
He said he didn't
feel like it.

I said, "You better."
And he said, "Or what?"

I said, "Or else you're
gonna be in trouble."
He said, "Jam it."

That's wonderful story, Bodie.
I've noticed you've
stopped stuttering.

I've been giving myself
shock treatments.
Up the voltage.

I'm sorry he isn't here...
That clown? Look at this.

We heard he wasn't coming.
Kent decided
to start without him.

We find the fluorescent yield
insignificant.

We think
that the sample's
been damaged.

What?
Well, obviously
the result of negligence.

It'll take us at least
another week to prepare
another sample.

I was afraid something
like this might happen.
Are you sure about that?

Oh, we're sure, all right.

Positive.
Positive.

Excuse me.
KENT: I mean there's simply
no excuse for it.

Excuse me!
Yeah, Mitch, what is it?

I think
the pump laser is down.
This doesn't look right.

Look.

There.

Well, it seems to be
all better now.
Aw.

Don't touch
other people's things!

Kent, I need you.

Anything, Jerry.
What?

Do you want me to teach
your sophomore class for you?

No, get copies made
of all the data so far.

So that young Mitch
can get started.

He's checking
everything tomorrow.
My pleasure.

Then after that,
stop by my cleaners.

Don't give it a thought.
I enjoy.

All right, Mitch,
shall we here?
Sure.

I guess it goes
from God to Jerry,

to you,
to the cleaners.

Right, Kent?

(SCOFFS)

Library, library.

205.

(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING)

(PEOPLE WHOOPING)

Welcome to Pacific Tech's
Smart People on Ice!

Let's go skating!

Ick, ice turned out so great!
Yeah, it worked, didn't it?

How did you do it?

Sure, I tell you.
Then you tell
somebody else.

The next thing you know,
we're in the middle
of another ice age.

Everybody must
be skating!

Just because
you're a slack, Knight.
Moles and trolls!

MITCH: What?
Moles and trolls!
Work, work, work!

We never see
the light of day.

We plan this thing
for weeks,

and all they want
to do is study!

I'm disgusted.
It's not like me.
I'm depressed!

(SCREAMING)

We had no one at
the Mutant Hamster Races.

We had one entry
for the Madame Curie
Look-alike Contest.

And he was disqualified later.
Why do I bother?

Let's go, Smith House!
What are you,
a bunch of weirdos?

Do you want a cherry?
I grow them myself.

Okay, let's go.

Oh!
Are you okay?

No, not emotionally,
no, I'm not.

I'm disappointed.
Not terribly, but still.

It should have gone
much further, much faster.

I know what
the problem is.

It's obviously
the drag coefficient.

I'll have to redesign it.
I can do that here.

But that takes time.
You know how long this
stuff's supposed to last?

Maybe another half an hour.
That's great.

No problem.
What's your name?

Mitch.
Thank you, Mitch.

You're welcome!
Who's that?
That?

I'm Jordan.
I forgot to tell
you my name.

I heard there's someone new
this term? Are you it?
Yes.

Do you have a bed?
Yeah.

I was going to make you one
if you didn't have one.
Okay, bye.

Bye.

What's all this
supposed to be?
This? This is ice.

This is what happens to water
when it gets too cold.

This? This is Kent.
This is what happens
to people

when they get too
sexually frustrated.

(LAUGHING)

This should keep you
busy for a while.

This, plus your
regular class load

should turn your brains to
tapioca in less than a month.

Kent, that is so unfair.
We were going to make you
king of the winter carnival.

Yeah?

(MITCH AND ICK LAUGHING)

Oh, ha, ha, ha!
Are you in on this, too?

Did you make this stuff?
I'm not saying.

Who will clean up?
It'll go from solid form
directly to gas.

Whoa! Really?
What is it?

I'm not saying.
But it's fairly rare
and very unstable.

Just like you.
You're a bunch
of degenerates.

We are? What about the time
I found you naked
with that JELL-O?

You did not!
This is true!

I was hot and hungry.
Okay?

Whoa!

Anyway, I got news
for you, Knight.

You're not number one
anymore.
Number one what?

Mighty Mouse beat
your placement scores
by over 20 points.

I guess you think
you're hot stuff.

No.
Yeah, well, hey!

Maybe you are
smarter than me.
But can you do this?

Whoa!

(COUGHING)
Ick, what's happening
with the ice?

(COUGHING)

Ick! I'm melting.

It worked!
That's neat!

Now, if we can keep
it from exploding.
Explo... Explo...

(LAUGHING)

Hey, Ick,
you were just joking
about exploding, right?

Ick?

It's a joke, right?

(DOOR OPENING)

(TOILET FLUSHING)

Hi, I thought I saw
you come in here.

We met last night.
I'm Jordan.

I made you a sweater.
Last night?

Yeah, I hope I got
the size right.

I'm pretty
sure I did.

I have a good eye
for that sort of thing.
Are you peeing?

Yeah.
Oh... I never sleep.

It drove
my roommate nuts.

They had to take her
away in an ambulance,
but she's okay now.

But she had to transfer
to an easier school.

If you ever need to talk,
just let me know.

Because I never
sleep, okay?
Thanks, I will.

Are you done?
I can't start.

Because I'm here?
I think so.

Weird.
Well, I have to go.
Me, too.

Bye.

Good morning!

Chris?
Morning.

You know, um,
something strange happened
to me this morning.

Was it a dream
where you see yourself
standing on a pyramid

with a thousand naked women
screaming and throwing
little pickles at you?

(CHUCKLES) No.
Why am I the only person
that has that dream?

Is that liquid nitrogen?
Mmm-hmm.

Coffee?
No.

CHRIS: So what happened?
There's a guy living
in our closet.

You've seen him, too?

Who is he?

Hollyfeld.
Why does he go
into our closet?

Why do you go
into our closet?
To get my clothes.

That's not why he does.
Of course not.

He's twice your size.
Your clothes would
never fit him.

Yeah.

Think before you ask
these questions, Mitch.

20 points higher
than me?

Thinks a big guy
like that can wear
his clothes.

* I never thought
this could happen

* I never thought
I could feel this way

* Till this strange reaction
today

(DOOR CREAKING)

* You give me a new sensation

* In a place
that has no name

* Something tells me
I'll never be the same

* Now, it's all changed

* I'm falling, falling

* Falling, falling

* I'm falling, falling

* Falling, falling

* I began to slip

* I didn't know
what was coming next

(CAR HONKING)

* Even so, I was not
prepared for this

* Not prepared for this

* This, this, this

(WHIRRING)

* I used to think
nothing mattered

* Now, I see possibilities

* You showed
a new direction to me

* And it's all changed

* I'm falling, falling

* Falling, falling

* I'm falling, falling

* Falling, falling

(INAUDIBLE CHATTER)

* I began to slip

* I didn't know
what was coming next

* Even so, I was not
prepared for this

* Not prepared for this

* I'm falling, falling

* I'm falling, falling

* I'm falling, falling

* Falling, falling

* Falling

* Falling

MAN ON TAPE:
...plus y equals zero...

(BANGING)

This is it.

(MACHINE WHIRRING)

Come on,
get out of here!
Get out of here!

You wanted to see me,
your joggingness?
Mr. Knight!

Right on time.
That's a little unusual
these days.

You still run?
Only when chased.

What's that smell?
Must be the dog.

That's popcorn.
Get it away from me.
I can't stand popcorn.

I hate popcorn.
Put it over there.

Good. Now I know
what to get you
for your birthday.

We're moving up
in the world, eh, Jerry?

It's very elegant.
Thank you.
Try not to touch anything.

Is this okay, sir?
It's oak. It's not plywood,
for God's sake.

Quite a change
from the old place.
Shoes.

I want to see a lot
more of you in the lab.

Fine, I'll gain weight.

You're a very funny boy,
Chris.

(CHUCKLES)
Thanks, Jerry. We try.

You can sit.

When I first brought
you into this school

I thought you'd become
another Einstein.

And you were well
on your way, and then...
I got a haircut.

You're disappointing me,
Chris.
And you, me, Jerry.

Look, it's about our deal.
I know, Jerry.

I have advanced your project
more than any three
students on campus.

That was yesterday.
What have you done today?

Well, uh, uh...

(FEIGNING SOBBING)

I want five megawatts
by mid-May.

(LAUGHS DISBELIEVINGLY)

Uh, Jerry, I think
you might be getting
a little obsessive.

I took in Mitch,
okay?

He's coming along fine.
He's working his guts out.

So what exactly
do you want?

I want five megawatts
by mid-May.

Look, I don't care
if you're arrogant.

I don't care
if you're disrespectful.

But your attitude's
distracting Mitch,
and that I won't have.

The rules have changed.
I want it by mid-May.

Jerry, I think that
you're just forgetting

about one little detail
and that's that
I'm out of here.

I'm gone, I'm history,
I'm graduating.

To graduate, you need
my course, dear boy.

It seems that
I have something to say about
what you do and where you go.

So, from now on, you and Mitch
will spend every waking moment
in the lab.

You will solve
my power problem
and by my deadline.

Jerry, if you think
by threatening me,

you can get me
to be your slave,

well, that's
where you're right.

But I'm only saying this
because I care.

There are many
decaffeinated brands
that taste real.

I'm not kidding, Chris.

Neither am I, Jerry.

Hi, Mitch.

Do me a favor, will ya?
Taste this.

Come on, you won't
hurt my feelings.

What, too sweet?

What is it?

I don't know.
I found it in
one of the labs.

(EXCLAIMS)

Relax.
It's just yogurt.

Mmm.

Mitch. Mitch.
Are you all right?

No, I'm not.

This combination of electrical
plus chemical cyanide is dumb.

We're going
in the wrong direction.

You're the only one that knows
how to use this garbage,

and you're never here,
and finally,
I'm getting brain-fried.

Okay, I'm going to
make it up to you.
Let's just pause.

Let's just take
a step back.

No, I was wrong.
I'm sorry.
Take a step forward.

Now take a step back.

Step forward. Step back.
Then we're cha-cha-ing!

Will you stop it!
I'm serious.

Okay, I'm serious, too.
Let's charge this baby up.
Give me everything you got.

I've got to go
in the cage first.

Okay, this is work time.

How you doing there, Mitch?

Fine, don't rush me.

Okay, just take your time.
Everything's fine.

What is taking so long?

I'm coming.

Charging.
Shades.

(WHIRRING)

What are you doing?
Waiting.

Oh, no!
Relax.

That's just the fuses
at the substation.

They'll have it
back on in a minute.

Maybe I shouldn't have
shorted across the building
transformer.

But, more importantly,
did we get a charge?

What did you do?
Wait a minute, this...
Come on, Sputnik.

Well, you wanted help,
so here we go.

What?
Beautiful pines.

Chris, we have work.
We can't...

We're going to work.
Hard work, friend.

This must have
taken you hours.
What did you...

I told you
they'd turn it back on.

MAN: What's this?
CHRIS: It's a laser
beam, bozo.

MAN: What's it for?
CHRIS: Not what, where?

MAN: What?
CHRIS: Follow it!
It's a surprise!

(PEOPLE CHATTERING)

You like it?

MAN:
Hey, what's
the beam splitter for?

CHRIS:
What's the matter
with you guys?

You have to have everything
spelled out for you?

(PEOPLE CLAPPING)

(PEOPLE CHEERING)

CHRIS: Come on, let's tan.

(ALL SHE WANTS TO DO IS DANCE
PLAYING)

We have one for Mitch.

* And all she wants to do
is dance, dance

(GIRLS EXCLAIMING)

* Rebels been rebels
since I don't know when

(SPLASHING)

Moola Bulla, boys.

Come on in.
The South Pacific calls you!

MITCH:
Chris, who are the girls?

They're not from around here.
I'd know.

They're from a nearby
college, though.
MAN: Which one?

"The Wanda Trussler
School of Beauty."

They're beauticians?
Not yet.

I don't know.
These girls are not
used to geniuses.

You might impress them.
I don't see how.

Given the type
of people you are
and the environment you're in,

you have to admit
the strong probability

that this may be the only
chance in your entire lives
to have sex.

Think about it.

Yeah!

(SHOUTING)

(EXCLAIMING)

* She wants to party

* She wants to get down

* All she wants to do is

* All she wants
to do is dance

(MAN WHOOPING)

Destiny!
I've got her now!

* Well, the government bugged
the men's room

* In the local disco lounge

Don't eat that.
Huh?

Eating that stuff
can give you
very large breasts.

Oh, my God!
I'm too late!

* And all she wants
to do is dance

* But that don't keep the boys

* From makin' a buck or two

(GIRL GIGGLING)

* And all she wants to
do is dance, dance

Don, don't act as if I don't
want my own invention to work.

There are only
so many hours in the day.

Ready to go,
Dr. Hathaway.

Pushing me doesn't help.

You'll have
to tell them that.

They want me to tell you,
either you start
showing results

or they're going to
find somebody else.
Oh, really? Who?

Then you won't have
your big toys anymore.

I'm the best, Don.
Who do you think
you're dealing with?

How dare you try to threat...
I have to go on.

This whole conversation
is in incredibly poor taste.

I really do...

Son of a bitch.
Asshole.

(CLASSICAL MUSIC PLAYING)

WOMAN ON SPEAKER: Welcome to
Everything
with your host,
Dr. Jerome Hathaway ,

funded by
a grant from Darlington
Electronic Instruments.

And now, Dr. Hathaway.

Hi, I'm Jerry Hathaway,
with
Everything.

Tonight, we are going
to look at something

that most of us
take for granted,

the colon.

What does it look like?

MAN: (WHISPERING)
Get out of there.
Get out of there.

Kent!
WOMAN: Cut!

What?

You're standing in front
of the teleprompter.

Well, I didn't know.
Listen, there's something
I have to tell you.

Did you pick up
my dry cleaning?
Yes, I did.

But there's something
you should know.
The gravy stain?

No, no. That came out.
It's about Chris and Mitch.

They're not working.
They're at a party,
with girls.

I want you to show me where.
My pleasure.

(TARZAN YELL)

(ONE NIGHT LOVE AFFAIR
PLAYING)

* But I never thought
that I'd be touching you

* How was I to know

* I'd let my feelings go

* And that I'd be yours

* Before the night
was through

* One night love affair

* Trying to make
like we don't care

Hi, are you busy?

Yes...
No, no.

Do you want to help
test my re-breather?

Come on!
Sure!

* Pretendin' it ain't there

It's actually
a simple principle.
It's basically a filter.

It lets the CO2 out
and the O2 back in.

How come
you're not, uh...

Necking?
I'm not gay!

No, partying!

Oh. Because I'm 19
and I'm brilliant
and I'm hyperkinetic.

Guys are a little afraid.
If I stopped to think
about it, I'd be upset.

I think you're very nice.

* But I lose control

I think you're nice, too.

Do you want
to try this?

* Now you're out of reach

* One night love affair

It's lighter in the water.
How about you?

(SCREAMS)

* We were both reachin' out
for somethin'

* Yeah, yeah

(MUSIC STOPS)

MAN:
Hey, what's with the music?

Taylor!

(DISTORTED) Taylor!

(MITCH COUGHING)

You're supposed to be
in the lab tonight,
weren't you?

I was. I just got...
You're at Pacific Tech
to work, not to play doctor.

I was working.
I just got...
Yeah, where's Knight?

You both make me sick.
Kent!

What? Yeah, oh.

I took a big chance in
recommending a 15-year-old.

I can see now
that I made a mistake.
Hope you're proud of yourself.

Dr. Hathaway?
What?

Are you wearing makeup?

What?

(MUSIC RESUMES)

* One night love affair

(CHRIS WHOOPING)

CHRIS: Cannonball!

* We were both reachin'
out for somethin'

I just need
one more quarter...

(MITCH DIALING PHONE)

MITCH:
Yes, I'd like to
make a collect call

to Mrs. Bill Taylor.

(WHISPERING) Ahh.
Come on, come on,
come on, come on.

MITCH: Mitch Taylor.

KENT: Got an idea,
great idea.

What? What?
Hold it down.

MITCH: (CRYING) Mom, I...

I want to come home.

MITCH ON PHONE:
Mom, are you there?

MRS. TAYLOR: Baby,
you sound upset. What's wrong?

I don't like it here anymore.
I want to come home
and live with you.

You've rented out my room?
Mom, to who?

MRS. TAYLOR:
You remember Mr. Igavera?

(WHISPERING)
Bodie, look. Look.
Listen!

MITCH: Mom! I...

Where were you
last night?

In the lab, where you
were supposed to be.

Jordan said Hathaway
got down on you.

What exactly
did he, uh...

Let me hold on
to that thought
and get back to you.

MITCH ON PA:
Mom, mom, are you there?

MRS. TAYLOR ON PA:
Baby, you sound upset.
What's wrong?

MITCH: (CRYING)
I don't like it here anymore.

I want to come home
and live with you.

MRS. TAYLOR:
It's not for you to like.

It's for you to do.
You're 15 years old now.

(MAN LAUGHING)

MITCH: Mom, I want to come
home and live with you.

MRS. TAYLOR:
You want to live
with me and Daddy?

MITCH: I want to go
back to high school.

MRS. TAYLOR:
Honey, Daddy's
rented out your room.

MITCH:
Rented out my room?
Mom, to who?

MRS. TAYLOR:
You remember Mr. Igavera?
He's the plumber.

MITCH: Why can't
Mr. Igavera and I share it?
I don't want to stay here.

MRS. TAYLOR: Now, Mitchy,
that doesn't sound like
Mama's little soldier.

MR. TAYLOR:
Mitch, it's your dad.

MITCH: Hi, Dad.
MR. TAYLOR: Are you crying?

MITCH: I'm sorry.

MR. TAYLOR: Well, I hope
nobody sees you.

MITCH: I'm just a kid.

MR. TAYLOR: (CHUCKLES)
You've never
been "just a kid."

Okay.

If you want to leave,
go ahead.

But, uh...
You're going
to miss the fun.

What fun?
Ick invented
a new virus

and we're going
to release it
in Kent's room.

The other night I needed
your help and all you
wanted to do was party.

I did help you.
I tried to help you relax.

Being snubbed by beauticians
is not my idea of relaxing.
Student beauticians.

You know,
I thought this place
was going to be different,

but it's just the same.

In high school, they
stuffed me in a mailbox.
Did I tell you that?

My teachers disliked me
because I was smarter
than they were.

The students hated me
because I blew the bell curve.
Does that sound familiar?

Mitch, I was just like you.
My mother dressed
me in Hush Puppies

and made me
carry a briefcase,

guaranteeing a girl
would never talk to me.

When I first came here,
I studied all the time.

You?
Yeah.

And then one night, sitting
in this chair right here,
I had a vision.

What?
Hollyfeld.

The guy in the closet?

Lazlo Hollyfeld.

I followed him
into the closet, down
into the steam tunnels.

And there, I saw
the most disgusting thing
I've ever seen.

What?
Hollyfeld, in his pajamas.

So?
So, I talked to him.

You did?

He used to be
the number one
stud around here.

(WHISPERING) Smarter than
you and me put together.

What happened?
Did he crack?

Yes, Mitch,
he cracked, severely.
Why?

He loved his work.

What's wrong with that?
There's nothing
wrong with that.

But that's all he did.
He loved solving problems.

He loved coming up
with the answers.

But he thought that
the answers were
the answer for everything.

All science,
no philosophy.

One day, someone tells him
the stuff he was making
was killing people.

Are you saying I'm gonna
end up in the steam tunnel?

Yeah.
What?

You are,
if you keep up like this.

Mitch, you don't need to
run away from here.

When you're smart,
people need you.

You can use
your mind creatively.

I notice
you don't study too hard.
Bingo.

Yeah, but if I stay,
what should I do?

First thing you should do
is get even with Kent.
It's a moral imperative.

Yeah.
Yeah!

(WILD LAUGHTER)

Now you try.

Yeah!

(HYSTERICAL LAUGH)

Now, let's unpack.
Right.

(LAUGHING)

See,
at Northern Electronics,
you don't get stock options,

which is what makes
Darlington so sweet.

You get everything.
Yeah, but Knight's
got that locked.

KENT: Well, maybe he does
and maybe he doesn't.

Okay, pssst!

Come on.
Come on, you guys!
He's gone!

Kent puts his name
on his license plate.

My mother does that
with my underwear.

She puts license plates
in your underwear?
How do you sit?

Hello, Rafael.

(AIR HISSING)

Hey, Kent.

That's your car.

Kent, you know you're
not supposed to park
that on campus.

You know,
this isn't funny.

You've gone too far
this time, Knight.

I had help.

You, huh?

Well, I'm going to
get you guys.

Dr. Hathaway is gonna
hear all about this.
You'll rue the day!

"Rue the day"?
Who talks like that?

Wow! Hello.

Hi.

Well...

Listen, Jerry asked me
to drop by.

What did he
ask you to do?
What?

Which word
didn't you understand?

Are you here
for the meeting?
What meeting?

I don't know.
Okay.

Look, I'm just waiting.
Right.

(DOOR OPENING)

DECKER: Finally,
what it comes down to,

if you can't do it,
we'll have to get
somebody else.

I have a timetable.
We're really very close.

There's absolutely
nothing to worry about.

Try and remember,
you work for me.

I think I've made
my point, haven't I?
Crystal clear.

Anything I should
know about, boys?

I'll be with you
in a moment.
Good luck, Jerry. Susan.

Well, I guess
this is goodbye.

I'm sorry
I didn't get a chance
to know you at all.

I can't stand it.
Have you ever seen a body
like this before?

She's my daughter.
Well then,
I guess you have.

Coming, Don?
Yeah.

No, seriously, listen.

If there's anything
I can do for you

or, more to
the point, to you,

you let me know,
okay?

Can you hammer
a spike through a board
with your penis?

Not right now.
A girl's got
to have standards.

DECKER: Susan.

Whoo. That is
a very smart girl.

What are you doing?
You said come over.

Stay off the rug.

Take off your shoes.
What's up, doc?

Sit down.
Who are those guys?

You are no longer
of any use to me!

An interesting way to
open up a conversation.

I'm giving Kent
the Darlington job.
Did you suddenly find humor?

You already gave me the job.
You need a degree.

I can pass your exam.
Even if you pass,
you don't pass.

Why don't you leave
the campus right now?

Okay, fine.
I'll go to Dr. Meredith.

The work on the laser
should merit a degree.

You can
tell Meredith anything.

Who's he going to believe?
You or me?

You can't do this.
It's done.

You're out! Get out!
I'll make sure you never
work in this field again.

You unbelievable bastard.
Count on it.

Whatcha doing?

Self-realization.

I was thinking
of the immortal
words of Socrates,

who said,
"I drank what?"

Is there something wrong?

Hathaway is going to
flunk me out of school.

Why?
I screwed up.

What are you gonna do?

I guess I'll leave.
You can't do that.

You'll be a failure.

Thank you, Mitch.

I mean, you just can't leave.
You owe me ten bucks.

You can't quit now.

If for no other reason

than to see a five megawatt
laser fired, just once.

That would be nice.

You got to finish
what you start.

Who said that?
You know that.

That's right,
Mitch,

but that is no way to
motivate somebody.

(CHUCKLES)

You've got to get even
with Jerry Hathaway.

It's a moral imperative.

That's a good point.

* Number one is
a hard time in the making

* Number two is
the one place I'm a-taking

* Number three goes
on one knee for a token

* Number four is
the short straw,
but it's broken

* I'd give my arm
just to be number one

* Number one is
a hard time in the making

* Don't give
Don't give

* A damn
A damn

* What else
What else

* I am
I am

* I am
I am

* The man
In the making

* In the making
In the making, making

* Number five is a bad drive
'round the circuit

* Number six is a sad trick
when you're working

* I'd give the world
if I could be number one

* Number one is the one way
to salvation

* I'll do
I'll do

* My best
My best

* To beat
To beat

* The rest
The rest

* And be
And be

* The best in the nation

* In the nation
In the nation, nation

* I'll stake
I'll stake

* My claim
My claim

* I'll make
I'll make

* My name
My name

* My love
My love

* My game
My vocation

* My vocation, my vocation
My vocation, my vocation

(SCREAMING)

* I'd give my all
just to be number one

* I'd give my all
just to be number

* I'd give my all
just to be number one

* No fears
No fears

* No doubts
No doubts

* What else
What else

* I am
I am

* I am
I am

* The man
In the making
In the making *

No, Peter, not again.

(MUMBLING)

No!
Mitch. Mitch.

Why don't you
get some sleep?

It's not like we're driving
or anything.

You're still
a growing boy,
I hope.

Hey, Lazlo.

Lazlo?

Uh-oh.
That's me.

Hello.

I've been watching you.

Thanks.

I thought you might
need some help with the test,
so I dug into the computer

and got every question
Hathaway's ever asked

on every final
he's ever given.

Gee, I... I didn't
get you anything.

Are those they?

No, these are entries into
the Frito-Lay sweepstakes.

"No purchase necessary,
enter as often as you want,"
so I am.

That's great.
How many times?

Well, this batch
makes it 1,650,000.

I should win 32.6%
of the prizes,
including the car.

That takes the fun
out of it, doesn't it?

They set up the rules.

And lately, I've realized
that I have certain
materialistic needs.

So, uh...
Where are the questions?

I memorized them.
Sure.

Hmm. Uh...

I've got to go to sleep.

Did you want to
borrow my pajamas?

No, no, thanks.

He's a pretty smart kid.
CHRIS: Yeah.

He's gonna grow five inches
within the next year.

WOMAN: Mitch?
Jordan?

Mitch Taylor?
Uh...

Who...
My name
is Sherry Nugil.

I've been waiting
three years for this.

For what?
For you to
be old enough.

For what?
For this.

(LOUD WHIRRING)

(KNOCKING ON DOOR)

Come in!

Oh, hi, Mitch!
I'm just sanding
the floor!

Could you turn
that off a second?

(WHIRRING STOPS)

What's the matter?
How come you're so sweaty?

I just came back
from helping Chris

and there was
a woman in my room.

Pardon?
A woman.
You know, she was... Adult.

Oh.
Well, she wanted...

She wanted to...
God, how can I say this
so not to offend you?

Jump you?
Yeah.

You made it with her?
No, no, no, that's
what was unbelievable.

Pardon?
It's true, I stopped her.

I told her I didn't want to.
Why?

Because I really did want to.

Huh?
I wanted to,

but not with her.

Oh.

This is my class hour.
It's the 10th of May.

What is it?
What are you doing here?

(SHOUTING) What am I doing...
What are you doing here?

You don't seem to realize,
do you? Decker is dangerous.
Where's the laser?

It's coming.
It's coming! Ha!

It's not even breathing hard!
Jerry!

He wants the laser
by the end of the week.

Now, you listen to me,
you groveling bug!

I have exams.
I am doing what I can.
So get off my back.

Well, I think that should
just about do the trick,

as long as you stay cool.

Let's go, girls.
What do you
m-m-mean by that?

(STUTTERING) It's a figure
of speech, Bodie.

You guys coming
to the exam, or what?

Well, I guess so,

seeing as how Hathaway's
gone to the trouble
of having one and everything.

You coming, buddy-boy?

Uh, I'll catch up
with you guys,
I have to go to the bathroom.

Okay, Kent, but I don't think
that's gonna help
your confidence any, do you?

* Buddy-boy

Buddy-boy.

Let's see how funny
you think this is.

Buddy-boy.

All right, we...

(DOOR CLOSES)

Sorry.

We have exactly
three hours for this.

And remember, we believe
in the honor system here,
boys and girls.

Though it will be
readily apparent to me

how many of you
have absorbed this material,
and how many of you haven't.

Take one and pass them back
just like your IQ
was normal.

Good luck, buddy-boy.

Do you mind if I name
my first child after you?

"Dipshit Knight"
has a nice ring to it.

Whoa!

No, no!

No!

No! No!

My condolences
on your meltdown, Knight.

What meltdown, Kent?

I'm not saying
that you had one,

because how would I know?

But just in case you do.

You slime.
It's your own fault,
Knight.

Didn't anyone ever
tell you to make sure
your optics are clean?

(SCREAMS)

Yeah!

(SHOUTING)

How's it feel to be frozen?

Yeah, ice is nice!

Lazlo, buddy!
Have you seen Mitch?

No.
No?

Mitch!
He's not in there.

How did you do?
How did I do? I passed,
but I failed. Yeah!

Well, then I'm happy
and sad for you.
Thank you.

I've got to find Mitch!
Mitch!

It's beautiful.
He's not in the toilet.

I'm going to freeze it.
I think I can get at least
an order of magnitude

because it's gonna be frozen,
maybe bromide.

I think I can do it,
but I'm not sure.
I've got to find Mitch.

Take care, bye.

Hey, Mitch!
You're not Mitch!
And you're not either!

Hey, Lazlo, want to see
a demonstration of gravity?
Yeah!

It can be done.
That's what we know!
That's what works.

(CHRIS SHOUTING)

Yeah, Mitch!
Where are you?

(SCREAMING)

You jerk!

I'm very sorry!
I'll buy you a car!

I don't have one.
It's my dad's!

(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING)

Mitch!

(DOORBELL RINGING)

What the...
Hey, how's it going, Jerry?

What do you want, Knight?
World peace.

But this isn't the time
to discuss it.
Get out.

There's something that
might interest you, Jerry.

I'm not interested
in anything you have to say.

Dr. Hathaway...
CHRIS: Susan?

I solved the power problem,
Jerry.

Jerry?

Take a cab.

CHRIS:
So, you'll hammer later.

(SCREAMING)

CHRIS: As you know,
Mitch and I were working
on the cyanide system.

Earlier today,
it ate itself.

But these little setbacks
are sometimes
just what we need

to take a giant
step forward, right, Kent?

Needless to say,
I was a little despondent
about the meltdown.

But in the midst of
my preparation for hari-kari,
it came to me.

It is possible to
synthesize excited bromide
in an argon matrix.

Yes, it's an excimer
frozen in its excited state.
That's impossible.

It's a chemical laser,
but in solid,
not gaseous form.

Put simply,
in deference to you, Kent,

it's like lasing
a stick of dynamite.

As soon as we apply a field,

we couple to a state
that is radiatively coupled
to the ground state.

I figure we can extract

at least ten to the
21st photons
per cubic centimeter,

which will
give one kilojoule
per cubic centimeter

at 600 nanometers,
or one megajoule per liter.

That's hotter
than the sun.

It's small.
It's supposed to be small.

Of course, we only
have the one sample.

And it's going to
destroy itself as it lases.

But everything's
going to be fine.

(WHIRRING)

Isn't it, Mitch?
Yeah.

This is a complete
waste of time.

ALL: Shh!

Do me a favor Kent and
put the target in front of the
cinder blocks, will you?

MITCH: Okay,
come behind the shield.

Okay, Mr. Taylor,

anytime you're ready.

Okay.

Ready?
Laser on!

Whoa!

Oh!
Fantastic! All right!

Look at this!

Wow.

MITCH:
Sorry about the window, sir.

And the trees
across the quad!

What a team!

You did it.
KENT:
I did my part, too.

You graduate.
You get the job.

What? You can't!
That's my job.

I've done everything
you ever asked me to.

You can't do this!

Look, look!
I teach your classes for you.

I get your laundry.
What is he doing?

I mounted the optics
for the phase conjugate
target tracking system.

Now, look at this mirror.

Look! Look!

Wait. Wait.
MITCH:
Let's celebrate!

Absolutely.

(LAUGHS)

ICK: You see anything unusual
on the campus?

ICK: Ow, my glasses.
Okay, well,
try not to wobble.

There's a complete hole.

That's pretty.
Look.

(CROWD CHATTERING)

Look at that!
Let's get a burger.

Come on, let's go.
What? In there?

(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING)

(PEOPLE SHOUTING)

MITCH:
This place is wild.

Did you see that?
You want to meet her?
She lives in Playa del Rey.

Are you gonna take me home
to meet your parents?
No.

Why? Are you
ashamed of me?

No, them!
Oh.

You better remember
the right people to thank.

I'd like to thank
my fish, Albert.
Your fish?

He got me!
I love it!

What I was talking about...

It's a...
What are you
trying to say?

CHRIS: Lazlo.

Lazlo, I'm so glad
you came out.
You want a hamburger?

I've been thinking
about your laser solution.

You've increased the output
to six megawatts.

CHRIS: Yeah, about that.

What would you use that for?

Making enormous
Swiss cheese.

The applications
are unlimited.
No.

With the fuel
you've come up with

the beam would last for what,
15 seconds?

What good is that?

Lazlo, that doesn't matter.
I respect you but I graduated.

Let the engineers
figure out a use for it.
That's not our concern.

Maybe somebody
already has a use for it.

One for which
it was specifically designed.

You mean, Dr. Hathaway
had something
in mind all along?

Look at the facts,
very high-powered, portable,

limited firing time,
unlimited range.

All you need is
a tracking system

and a large spinning mirror
and you could vaporize
a human target from space.

This is not good.

No.

JORDAN:
What happened?

Oh, no.

Chris.
I'm all right.

They took everything.
Kent's tracking
system's gone.

How could you
build that mirror?

He lied to us.
It's easy to lie
to you, Mitch.

You trust people.
I'm a cynic.

I'm such an asshole.

I understand
how you feel, Chris.
And you're right.

But what we should be
doing now is trying to
find out what he's doing.

MITCH: Kent.

Shh, you guys!

(GAS WHOOSHING)

We'll have two minutes.
Pardon?

(DOOR CLOSING)

BOY: Hi.
Hi.

(HEAVY THUD)

Open his mouth.

Okay, um, bulldogs.

And transceiver.

And tweezers.

See, it was the braces
that gave me the idea.
They're a perfect antenna.

His whole head
becomes a speaker.

ICK: About time someone
put it to good use.

Kent?

(DEEP VOICE)
Kent, wake up, Kent!

Ow!
Kent!

What?

I'm talking to you, Kent.

What is this?

I said I'm talking to you.
No.

Yeah!

Well, I'm not asleep.
Must be overworked.

You're not overworked, Kent.
Well, I'm not insane!

Or am I?
That remains to be seen, Kent.

But we are having
a conversation.

Okay, who is this?
This is Jesus, Kent.

And you've been a very...

Naughty boy.

All right.
Who is this?

Cut the crap.
You've built a weapon.
What?

What do you think
a secret phase conjugate...

Tracking system is for?

A big mirror makes a big beam.

I guess it could be.

Where's the laser now?

I... I overheard Jerry mention
something about a test...

On the 27th,
but I don't know where.
It's classified.

What?
Oh, uh, nothing.

I want you to think
about what you've done, Kent.

And from now on,

stop playing with yourself.

It is God.

(SIGHING) Now what?

Phase two.

What is it with you?

(DOG BARKS)

What's that?

These military people
are so untrusting.

CHRIS: We can't get
on-base clearance?

LAZLO:
Oh, we will. It's just
gonna take six hours.

Forget it.

How do these look?

Terrible.
Mine looks like him
and his looks like me.

Great, I hope.
MITCH: What if these
don't fool anybody?

They shoot us.

ID.

O-de-o-de-o.
Show these to the guard
at the next gate.

Okey-dokey, you bet.

(COUGHS)

IDs.

Snap it up.
We just flew in.
We're late, we're tired,

we're hungry,
we rented this stupid car!

Are you out of your mind?
You've got to
intimidate these guys.

So be cool, it's okay.

You're not on the list.

(NERVOUS LAUGH) List?
Not on the list?

That's because
we're classified.

MITCH: Yeah.

(PHONE RINGS)

Security.
Yes, sir.

Aren't you guys
a little young
to be technicians?

Lasers are
a young science.

Okay, you made
me say it.

Now we're both
in trouble.

Look, I'll call
the duty officer.

Ah...
Hey, airborne!

Don't do that.

If you make that call,
it's our jobs.
We're four hours late.

Give us a break,
will you, buddy?

Someday you might be
in the private sector,
too, right?

MITCH: Yeah.

Yes.

We're dead.
Oh, no.

SECOND GUARD: Yes, sir.
All right.

Absolutely, sir.

Consider it done.

Yes, sir.

Look for anything
out of the ordinary.
Okay.

(WHISPERING)
Mitch, Mitch, come here.

My God.

CHRIS: Come on.

(BOTH LAUGHING)

(MEN CHATTERING)

MAN 1:
Primary and secondary
laser activation.

MAN 2: Processor A.
MAN 1: Check.

MAN 2: Processor B.
MAN 1: Check.

MAN 2: Communications link.
All the diagnostics seem okay.
MAN 1: Open, encryption on.

MAN 2: Final check.

65 degrees, 19 minutes.
Longitude 44 degrees,
9 minutes.

All systems go.
We're finished here, fellas.

What?

Okay, this little polynomial
should keep the computer

so busy it doesn't
even know we're here.

JORDAN:
Where are they?

We've got a connection.

CHRIS ON RADIO:
Abbott to Costello.
This is Costello.

We've got the goodies.

Okay, we've computed
target coordinates
for trajectory adjustment.

Roger, we're sending.

Uh-oh.
Uh-oh.

What is it?

Oh, nothing.

You didn't think
we'd blow all this money
to test in space, did you?

Well, actually, yes, I did.
Because that is what
it is designed for.

But if in your wisdom

you feel that
we should learn to
crawl before we walk,

I mean, that's...
That's fine, too, really.

Attention!
What?

Superior officer
in the room.
As you were.

Excuse me.
We're ready for the final
on-board laser check.

Shh!

(INDISTINCT CHATTER)

MITCH: (WHISPERING)
All clear.

I'm replacing the prom
with our e-prom.

Okay, shoot.

May I have
the coordinates, please?

34 degrees, 10 minutes,
15.21 seconds north.

119 degrees.

Seven minutes.

Follow me.
Right over this way.

I'm gonna go
check the stairs.

Chris, he's coming!
Hathaway's coming!

Mitch has informed me
that Herr Professor
is approaching.

What do we do?
Oh, please hurry!
Dr. Hathaway's coming!

I don't work well
under pressure.

Watch your head, there.

I hope that does it.
Okay, Chris...
I mean Abbott, hello?

Hello?

They're gone!

Okay, fine.
Fine.

Now we'll see
if it works.

Dr. Gore here will
explain any questions
you might have.

MAN: Yes, I was wondering
is there any problem
with reusing the weapon?

WOMAN:
Well, no, no problem.

(INDISTINCT CHATTER )

WOMAN: The beauty of
this system is that
the fuel laser results...

Everything
all right here?

Why shouldn't it be?

(MEN CHATTERING)

Well, I think that
just about sums it up,
don't you?

Shall we take our exit?

Okay, they're gone.
That was getting close.

Nothing like borrowing
a B-1, huh, General?

DON: What is it?

Nothing.

"Diagnosis of schizophrenia
by questioners and
objective personhood."

(DEEP VOICE) Hi, Kent.
Oh.

I thought you'd gone.
Not yet.

Have you been
touching yourself?

Yes.
I mean, no.

Good. Listen, Kent.

Dad... You know,
my father, God...
Wants to show you something.

Why?
I meant, "What?"

I've learned not to ask.

Look, he wants you to wait...

In front
of Dr. Hathaway's house...

At 639 Ivy Crest Drive
at precisely 7:08
this morning.

Ivy Crest?
Just wait there
and you shall receive a sign.

Do not despair
and do not go inside.

Well, why not?

Hello?
Hello, Jesus.

He hung up.

Crossbow 1, radar contact.

Take up a heading
of 025.

Climb and maintain
flight level 650.

MAN ON RADIO:
Roger, 025 out of
hydrometer flight level 650.

They're here.

Ah, Mr. Knight.

Why is it that
I am not surprised
to see you here?

And I suppose
you have an explanation

for this so-called event
that we're to witness.

Yes, sir, I do. But first,
let me take this opportunity
to compliment you

on your fashion sense,
particularly, your slippers.

Yes, well, uh,

Philomena likes them.
Hey, guys.

Chris.
Good morning.

Ah, Congressman Dougton.
What brings you around?

I was told there
was a situation here

of critical
international importance.

All weapon functions
will be controlled
from this command module,

just as they would be
from space.

In fact, this is
an exact duplicate
of the vehicle cockpit.

The accuracy and the power
will be as exact.

MAN ON RADIO:
We are coming in
on the target.

HATHAWAY: Open the doors.

Crossbow,
open bomb bay doors.

Those are very
serious accusations.
Yes, sir, I know.

If it's true,
I'm going to need proof.

Gentlemen, I think
we'll be able accommodate
you both in just one minute.

Duck.
Oh, sir, down.

Now, you listen to me, Jesus.

This is Jerry's house,
and we're very close.

So, if you're not
gonna answer me,
I'm going to have to go in.

So, I'm going.

CHRIS: Kent!
MITCH: No, Kent! Wait!

Get away!
ALL: Get away from there!

JORDAN: Don't go in there!

CHRIS: You can't go.
Back, Kent!

Target locked.
In ten.

Nine. Eight.

ALL: Kent! Come out!
Come out, Kent!

Okay, God, let me have it!

(JORDAN SCREAMS)

CHRIS: Oh, look!

Oh!

Ahh...

(POPPING)

Popcorn.

Oh!

No.

(ALL CHATTERING)

I don't understand.
Did it fire?

Did it fire?
Yes, but it's not
lasing efficiently.

Shut it down! Yes!
Shut it down?

Jerry,
I want to know what
the problem is.

Shut it down!
Shut the field down!
I am trying!

Kent!

(POPPING)

Whee!

Whee!
(CHUCKLES) Kent.

Kent!
JORDAN:
Hey, Kent!

Kent!
JORDAN:
Kent!

CHRIS:
Kent, you okay?
That was great.

(LAUGHING)

Something is very wrong.

Out!

Unlock the bird's-eye.
Unlocked.

I'm tracking
where the shot went.

It worked, I know it worked.

(ALL CHATTERING)

What?
Oh, no.

My house.
DECKER:
What have you done?

All right!

Look at the corner!
Great!

(HORN HONKING)

It's Lazlo
in a Winnebago.

Lazlo, buddy.

LAZLO:
I think we used too much.

I'm sorry you missed it.
Yeah, I had to pack.

Why?
I'm getting married.

To whom?
What is all this stuff?

Oh, yeah, I won!
31.8% of the prizes,
though,

I'll have to
figure that out,
but not this summer.

Hi.
Sherry? Sherry Nugil?

SHERRY:
Isn't it great?
This is number one.

I've been
looking for him
for ten years.

What can I say?
She loves me.

Congratulations.
Okay.

LAZLO:
Well, anyway, you'll
have to come and visit us.

What do you mean?
I have a survival
place in Wyoming.

We're going to live there.

It's getting kind of weird
around here, you know?

Bye!
Bye!

Goodbye.

(ENGINE STARTING)

Do you think it's getting
too weird around here?
Absolutely.

I didn't notice.
I like it.

(LAUGHS)

(ALL CHEERING)

(EVERYBODY WANTS TO
RULE THE WORLD
PLAYING)

* Welcome to your life

* There's no turning back

* Even while we sleep

* We will find you acting
on your best behavior

* Turn your back
on Mother Nature

* Everybody wants
to rule the world

* It's my own design

* It's my own remorse

* Help me to decide

* Help me make the most
of freedom and of pleasure

* Nothing ever lasts forever

(BARKING)

* Everybody wants
to rule the world

* There's a room where
the light won't find you

* Holding hands while
the walls come tumbling down

* When they do
I'll be right behind you

* So glad we've
almost made it

* So sad they had to fade it

* Everybody wants
to rule the world

* I can't stand
this indecision

* Married with
a lack of vision

* Everybody wants
to rule the

* Say that you'll never,
never, never, never mean it

* One headline,
why believe it?

* Everybody wants
to rule the world

* I can't stand
this indecision

* Married with
a lack of vision

* Everybody wants
to rule the

* Say that you'll never,
never, never, never mean it

* One headline,
why believe it?

* Everybody wants
to rule the world

* All for freedom
and for pleasure

* Nothing ever lasts forever

* Everybody wants
to rule the world