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1
00:00:01,736 --> 00:00:03,068
- Hey Jake, can I show you
2
00:00:03,070 --> 00:00:04,236
something over here?
- Sure thing, bud.
3
00:00:04,238 --> 00:00:05,454
- I'm trying to send
Genevieve a sexy pic.
4
00:00:05,455 --> 00:00:06,671
Does this make
my bubble butt pop?
5
00:00:06,674 --> 00:00:08,107
- Nope.
I'm out.
6
00:00:11,178 --> 00:00:14,446
[whispers] Who's that?
- [whispers] I don't know.
7
00:00:14,448 --> 00:00:17,616
- Um, excuse me, pal.
Think you're at my desk.
8
00:00:17,618 --> 00:00:19,118
- Whoa, whoa, whoa!
9
00:00:19,120 --> 00:00:20,185
- Drop it!
Drop the weapon!
10
00:00:20,187 --> 00:00:21,320
- Don't be a dum-dum.
11
00:00:21,322 --> 00:00:23,622
- Squad, meet
Detective Adrian Pimento.
12
00:00:23,624 --> 00:00:25,591
He's been deep undercover
for the last 12 years,
13
00:00:25,593 --> 00:00:29,161
but he's just resurfaced, and
he's rejoining the Nine-Nine.
14
00:00:29,163 --> 00:00:31,630
- That...is...
15
00:00:31,632 --> 00:00:33,232
awesome!
16
00:00:33,234 --> 00:00:36,235
[rock music]
17
00:00:36,237 --> 00:00:44,276
โช โช
18
00:00:46,000 --> 00:00:52,074
Advertise your product or brand here
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19
00:00:53,220 --> 00:00:55,187
- Some of you just met
Detective Pimento,
20
00:00:55,189 --> 00:00:57,623
and, of course, some of you knew
him before he went undercover.
21
00:00:57,625 --> 00:01:01,193
- Hitchcock and Scully. Ha.
You guys still work here?
22
00:01:01,195 --> 00:01:03,796
- The only way they're getting
rid of us is in a body bag.
23
00:01:03,798 --> 00:01:06,632
- It actually happened once,
but it was a false alarm.
24
00:01:06,634 --> 00:01:09,201
- Detective Pimento will be
returning to his old desk.
25
00:01:09,203 --> 00:01:11,370
Peralta will temporarily be
moved to the break room.
26
00:01:11,372 --> 00:01:12,404
Questions?
27
00:01:12,406 --> 00:01:13,572
- What'd you do undercover?
28
00:01:13,574 --> 00:01:15,140
- I worked for
Jimmy "The Butcher" Figgis.
29
00:01:15,142 --> 00:01:17,676
- That is an A-list mobster.
Tell me literally everything.
30
00:01:17,678 --> 00:01:19,478
Everyone, shut up!
31
00:01:19,479 --> 00:01:21,279
- Pretty much just
a bagman for him.
32
00:01:21,282 --> 00:01:23,248
I mean,
I did some other stuff.
33
00:01:23,250 --> 00:01:25,484
[grunting]
34
00:01:25,486 --> 00:01:28,520
[crying]
35
00:01:30,491 --> 00:01:34,093
- Um, we usually try to tell
funnier little stories.
36
00:01:34,095 --> 00:01:35,360
- Well, there's nothing
funny about what I did
37
00:01:35,362 --> 00:01:36,578
for The Butcher.
38
00:01:36,579 --> 00:01:37,795
I've had to learn
not to blink,
39
00:01:37,798 --> 00:01:40,566
because every time I close
my eyes, I see a fresh horror.
40
00:01:40,568 --> 00:01:41,633
- Ooh, dark.
41
00:01:41,635 --> 00:01:42,801
- But how do you keep
your eyes moist?
42
00:01:42,803 --> 00:01:44,236
- Actually, I have
43
00:01:44,238 --> 00:01:46,371
a very funny story
about keeping my eyes moist.
44
00:01:46,373 --> 00:01:49,408
[grunting]
45
00:01:51,445 --> 00:01:53,512
[laughs]
46
00:01:53,514 --> 00:01:55,247
Come on...
[laughing]
47
00:01:55,249 --> 00:01:56,248
- Nope.
48
00:01:56,250 --> 00:01:57,516
Still not getting
that vibe, man.
49
00:01:57,518 --> 00:01:58,851
- Really?
- Mm-mm.
50
00:01:58,853 --> 00:02:01,120
- I'll get there.
That's my bad, everybody.
51
00:02:01,122 --> 00:02:02,421
- Dismissed.
52
00:02:03,524 --> 00:02:06,758
- Sir, can I partner with
Pimento on my B&E?
53
00:02:06,760 --> 00:02:07,860
That guy is awesome.
54
00:02:07,862 --> 00:02:09,528
He's like a real life
Donnie Brasco.
55
00:02:09,530 --> 00:02:12,531
- Isn't Donnie Brasco a really
sad movie that ends terribly?
56
00:02:12,533 --> 00:02:13,732
- Yeah, but he's got
that cool jacket,
57
00:02:13,734 --> 00:02:15,167
and he's always
down at the docks.
58
00:02:15,168 --> 00:02:16,601
- I'm not sure I want
you working with Pimento.
59
00:02:16,604 --> 00:02:17,803
He's a little unstable.
60
00:02:17,805 --> 00:02:19,371
[banging]
61
00:02:19,373 --> 00:02:21,306
- Machine!
62
00:02:21,308 --> 00:02:24,276
- Psychologically, this could be
a very difficult transition.
63
00:02:24,278 --> 00:02:25,711
- Yeah, I know,
I went undercover.
64
00:02:25,713 --> 00:02:27,713
63 days, no big deal.
You probably forgot.
65
00:02:27,715 --> 00:02:29,515
- No, it's your outgoing
voice mail message.
66
00:02:29,517 --> 00:02:30,549
- Hey, it's Jake.
67
00:02:30,551 --> 00:02:31,884
Can't get to the phoneright now.
68
00:02:31,886 --> 00:02:35,254
I might be undercover again,like I was for 63 days.
69
00:02:35,256 --> 00:02:36,421
Bye!
70
00:02:36,423 --> 00:02:38,657
Look, I know what
he's going through.
71
00:02:38,659 --> 00:02:40,826
Let me be the man that
brings him in from the cold.
72
00:02:40,828 --> 00:02:42,794
- All right, he can work
the B&E with you.
73
00:02:42,796 --> 00:02:44,696
Just make sure
you take it easy.
74
00:02:44,698 --> 00:02:47,332
- Uh, sir, I was 20 minutes late
for work today.
75
00:02:47,334 --> 00:02:49,535
I don't think you need to
tell me about taking it easy.
76
00:02:49,537 --> 00:02:51,837
- Are you bragging
about being a bad employee?
77
00:02:53,507 --> 00:02:55,507
- No.
78
00:02:55,509 --> 00:02:57,276
Dismissed? Me?
79
00:02:57,278 --> 00:02:59,378
- I figured out the best way
80
00:02:59,380 --> 00:03:01,446
to welcome Pimento
to the Nine-Nine.
81
00:03:01,448 --> 00:03:03,949
- Stay out of his way,
maybe buy him a drink,
82
00:03:03,951 --> 00:03:05,551
not do anything weird?
83
00:03:05,553 --> 00:03:07,252
- I'm making him a goat stew.
84
00:03:07,254 --> 00:03:08,954
- Huh...all right.
85
00:03:08,956 --> 00:03:11,823
- Yeah, now,
this Turkmenistani dish
86
00:03:11,825 --> 00:03:15,260
is traditionally made from an
animal that's been so overfed
87
00:03:15,262 --> 00:03:16,762
it can no longer stand.
88
00:03:16,764 --> 00:03:18,397
- [whistles]
That's the dream.
89
00:03:18,399 --> 00:03:19,698
- Everything is authentic.
90
00:03:19,700 --> 00:03:21,633
I even ordered
the pressure cooker
91
00:03:21,635 --> 00:03:22,968
from Turkmenistan.
92
00:03:22,969 --> 00:03:24,302
- So you're on a terrorist
watch list now?
93
00:03:24,305 --> 00:03:26,638
- Oh, yeah, Homeland Security's
been in my house, yep.
94
00:03:26,640 --> 00:03:29,942
Now, this just needs to cook for
another 11 hours, 32 minutes,
95
00:03:29,944 --> 00:03:32,711
and 6--
[boom]
96
00:03:33,881 --> 00:03:37,382
- What the hell, Boyle!
You almost killed me!
97
00:03:37,384 --> 00:03:39,618
I'm not going out
in a stew-making accident!
98
00:03:39,620 --> 00:03:41,753
Terry's gonna die
saving the President,
99
00:03:41,755 --> 00:03:43,822
or Terry's never gonna die!
100
00:03:43,824 --> 00:03:46,592
- There's no way we can
clean this up by ourselves.
101
00:03:46,594 --> 00:03:47,893
We're gonna need help.
102
00:03:47,895 --> 00:03:49,528
- No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
103
00:03:49,530 --> 00:03:51,163
What are you saying?
104
00:03:51,164 --> 00:03:52,797
- You know what
she's saying, man.
105
00:03:52,800 --> 00:03:54,733
- Oh, no.
106
00:03:54,735 --> 00:03:56,368
Mean Marge.
107
00:03:56,370 --> 00:03:58,503
- So we're supposed to come
running to clean up your mess
108
00:03:58,505 --> 00:04:00,706
every time you snap
your fat little fingers?
109
00:04:00,708 --> 00:04:02,341
- Oh, no, no, I actually
can't snap my fingers,
110
00:04:02,343 --> 00:04:03,442
they're always too wet.
111
00:04:03,444 --> 00:04:04,910
And I just thought,
since it's your job--
112
00:04:04,912 --> 00:04:06,578
- Oh, I see.
113
00:04:06,580 --> 00:04:08,797
You cops think you're too good
to clean up after yourselves?
114
00:04:08,798 --> 00:04:11,015
- Uh--no, I can do it myself,
I'll just--
115
00:04:11,018 --> 00:04:12,551
- That's union work!
116
00:04:12,553 --> 00:04:15,654
How dare you try
to steal our jobs.
117
00:04:15,656 --> 00:04:17,656
- So where do we go from here?
118
00:04:17,658 --> 00:04:19,625
- Well,
you know the old saying,
119
00:04:19,627 --> 00:04:22,894
"The only way to unclog a toilet
is to let it sit."
120
00:04:22,896 --> 00:04:24,930
- You're a janitor.
You should know that's not true.
121
00:04:24,932 --> 00:04:26,832
- Boys, take out the trash.
122
00:04:26,834 --> 00:04:28,600
- Oh, great!
So you will do it?
123
00:04:28,602 --> 00:04:29,835
Oh!
I'm the trash, I get it.
124
00:04:29,837 --> 00:04:31,536
Okay, that makes more sense
with your tone.
125
00:04:31,538 --> 00:04:32,537
[metal chair skidding]
126
00:04:32,539 --> 00:04:34,806
Oops! Oh...[laughs]
Love you, Marge.
127
00:04:34,808 --> 00:04:36,708
- You wanted to see me, sir?
128
00:04:36,710 --> 00:04:38,543
- Yes, I have a special
project for you.
129
00:04:38,545 --> 00:04:39,878
- Okay, but I'll have
you know right now
130
00:04:39,880 --> 00:04:41,613
I only fly first class.
131
00:04:41,615 --> 00:04:42,948
- I'm not flying you anywhere.
132
00:04:42,950 --> 00:04:45,484
I made an application to
the M.C. Guffin Foundation
133
00:04:45,486 --> 00:04:47,419
for a grant to upgrade
our office equipment.
134
00:04:47,421 --> 00:04:50,289
Unfortunately, they require
a video submission.
135
00:04:50,291 --> 00:04:52,291
I understand you have
some filmmaking experience.
136
00:04:52,293 --> 00:04:54,826
- Well, you know, I've been
re-Vined by Rob Kardashian,
137
00:04:54,828 --> 00:04:56,762
so, yeah, I'm a director.
138
00:04:56,764 --> 00:04:57,929
Here's what I'm picturing:
139
00:04:57,931 --> 00:05:01,300
I enter, in, like,
a Fellini-style getup.
140
00:05:01,302 --> 00:05:02,934
Rosa's dressed
like a porcupine--
141
00:05:02,936 --> 00:05:04,736
- Oh, no, no.
We're just gonna do a simple,
142
00:05:04,738 --> 00:05:06,638
straightforward tour
of the precinct
143
00:05:06,640 --> 00:05:08,040
featuring
Detective Diaz and me.
144
00:05:08,042 --> 00:05:09,408
- Are you sure?
145
00:05:09,410 --> 00:05:12,678
You're not our most dynamic
screen presences.
146
00:05:12,680 --> 00:05:13,812
- I can be dynamic.
147
00:05:13,814 --> 00:05:15,347
Exclamation point.
148
00:05:15,349 --> 00:05:17,549
- Well, Diaz and I have
that kind of easy chemistry
149
00:05:17,551 --> 00:05:19,451
where we finish each other's--
- Sentences.
150
00:05:19,453 --> 00:05:21,486
- Please, don't interrupt me.
151
00:05:21,488 --> 00:05:24,523
That kind of nonsense
won't happen on camera.
152
00:05:24,525 --> 00:05:25,991
- Hey, hey, Pimento.
153
00:05:25,993 --> 00:05:26,992
- Hey!
154
00:05:26,994 --> 00:05:28,827
This is my desk, okay?
155
00:05:28,829 --> 00:05:31,763
- Okay, well, now that
that's out of the way,
156
00:05:31,765 --> 00:05:33,832
I was just coming to let you
know we're gonna work
157
00:05:33,834 --> 00:05:36,001
a B&E together;
we're gonna be partners.
158
00:05:36,003 --> 00:05:37,969
- Nope.
I work alone.
159
00:05:37,971 --> 00:05:40,105
Plus, The Butcher says
he has spies in the NYPD,
160
00:05:40,107 --> 00:05:42,474
so I trust
none of these dildos.
161
00:05:42,476 --> 00:05:44,376
- Listen, you can trust me.
162
00:05:44,378 --> 00:05:46,445
I'm, like, obsessed with you.
- [scoffs] Fine.
163
00:05:46,447 --> 00:05:49,114
Tell me something you've never
told another living soul.
164
00:05:49,116 --> 00:05:50,549
- Um...
165
00:05:50,551 --> 00:05:51,917
Ooh, here's one.
166
00:05:51,919 --> 00:05:54,720
I'm actually not strong enough
to lift a water cooler jug,
167
00:05:54,722 --> 00:05:56,121
so I always find a way
to make Terry do it.
168
00:05:56,123 --> 00:05:57,622
- Here's mine.
169
00:05:57,624 --> 00:05:59,024
Jimmy "The Butcher" made me
drive a croquet wicket
170
00:05:59,026 --> 00:06:02,094
through a guy's eyes
into his brain.
171
00:06:02,096 --> 00:06:05,464
Brain leaked out his eyes
like he was crying his own mind.
172
00:06:05,466 --> 00:06:06,965
- My goodness.
173
00:06:06,967 --> 00:06:08,500
Now that I've heard yours,
174
00:06:08,502 --> 00:06:10,369
I feel like
my water cooler thing
175
00:06:10,371 --> 00:06:11,770
could have been
a little more juicy, but...
176
00:06:11,772 --> 00:06:14,573
- No.
That was embarrassing for you.
177
00:06:14,575 --> 00:06:15,874
A bond has been made.
178
00:06:17,644 --> 00:06:19,511
Feels good to trust again,
brother.
179
00:06:19,513 --> 00:06:21,480
- Wow, either you are a cyborg
180
00:06:21,482 --> 00:06:24,449
or you're carrying
so many weapons in this jacket.
181
00:06:24,451 --> 00:06:26,852
- Hey.
Kitchen, now.
182
00:06:26,854 --> 00:06:27,919
- Okay.
183
00:06:27,921 --> 00:06:29,321
What's up?
184
00:06:29,322 --> 00:06:30,722
- Something's not right
about that guy.
185
00:06:30,724 --> 00:06:32,624
- Why, just because he keeps
threatening to kill me
186
00:06:32,626 --> 00:06:34,793
in the middle of a police
precinct? Uh, grow up.
187
00:06:34,795 --> 00:06:36,128
- Because I'm physically
attracted to him.
188
00:06:36,130 --> 00:06:37,829
- And that's bad?
189
00:06:37,831 --> 00:06:39,831
- I'm only attracted to creeps:
the Vulture, the ShamWow guy,
190
00:06:39,833 --> 00:06:41,133
and when I was a kid,
191
00:06:41,135 --> 00:06:42,768
I had a major crush
on the evil Gremlin.
192
00:06:42,770 --> 00:06:44,336
- Stripe?
Are you crazy?
193
00:06:44,337 --> 00:06:45,903
- Yeah, well I'm not
gonna bone Gizmo.
194
00:06:45,906 --> 00:06:48,006
- I would.
- Careful with Pimento.
195
00:06:49,009 --> 00:06:50,575
- It's gonna be fine.
196
00:06:54,047 --> 00:06:55,147
- Hey, partner.
197
00:06:55,149 --> 00:06:57,182
- Oh!
- I've been waiting for you.
198
00:06:57,184 --> 00:06:58,417
[chuckles]
199
00:07:01,422 --> 00:07:02,788
- Sorry if I surprised you.
200
00:07:02,790 --> 00:07:04,623
It's just when I was undercover,
the middle of the night
201
00:07:04,625 --> 00:07:05,991
was the only time
I could do actual police work.
202
00:07:05,993 --> 00:07:07,626
- Uh, how'd you get
in the apartment?
203
00:07:07,628 --> 00:07:08,860
- Oh, it was easy.
204
00:07:08,862 --> 00:07:10,495
I just seduced
the old lady upstairs,
205
00:07:10,497 --> 00:07:13,165
came down the fire escape,
jimmied the window open.
206
00:07:13,167 --> 00:07:15,867
Bing-bang-boom, I'm inside
your living quarters.
207
00:07:15,869 --> 00:07:17,469
- Totally.
208
00:07:17,471 --> 00:07:19,871
Course, next time you could just
give me a call, you know.
209
00:07:19,873 --> 00:07:21,440
Two ways to pop in on a friend.
210
00:07:21,442 --> 00:07:22,574
- I didn't kill
the old lady upstairs,
211
00:07:22,576 --> 00:07:23,742
if that's what
you're worried about.
212
00:07:23,744 --> 00:07:25,010
- Well, I am now.
213
00:07:25,012 --> 00:07:26,478
- Oh, wait a minute.
214
00:07:26,480 --> 00:07:28,447
You think I'm being weird.
215
00:07:28,449 --> 00:07:30,582
Oh, I shouldn't have come here.
This is your apartment.
216
00:07:30,584 --> 00:07:34,519
I'm so sorry, Jake!
Stupid, Paul!
217
00:07:34,521 --> 00:07:36,121
Stupid!
You idiot, Paul!
218
00:07:36,123 --> 00:07:37,789
- Hey! Pimento!
- Huh?!
219
00:07:37,791 --> 00:07:40,058
- Who's Paul?
- Whoa.
220
00:07:40,060 --> 00:07:41,827
Paul Sneed
was my undercover name.
221
00:07:41,829 --> 00:07:43,228
'Kay?
Damn it, Jake.
222
00:07:43,230 --> 00:07:44,763
I don't know who I am
anymore.
223
00:07:44,765 --> 00:07:46,465
- You could have chose
any name to go undercover,
224
00:07:46,467 --> 00:07:47,466
and you picked Paul Sneed?
225
00:07:47,468 --> 00:07:48,467
Seems kind of crazy.
226
00:07:48,469 --> 00:07:49,534
- I shouldn't have come here.
227
00:07:49,536 --> 00:07:50,902
This was a mistake.
I'm not ready.
228
00:07:50,904 --> 00:07:53,505
I knew I wasn't ready
to go back to being police.
229
00:07:53,507 --> 00:07:55,640
It's the only job I've ever had
except for bagging groceries
230
00:07:55,642 --> 00:07:58,176
at the supermarket at the corner
of Atlantic and Clinton.
231
00:07:58,178 --> 00:08:00,212
I guess I could go back
to that again.
232
00:08:00,214 --> 00:08:01,746
"Paper or plastic?"
233
00:08:01,748 --> 00:08:03,081
Yeah, still got it.
234
00:08:03,083 --> 00:08:04,983
- Listen to me,
I was undercover.
235
00:08:04,985 --> 00:08:08,687
63 days with the Mafia.
I saw some messed-up stuff.
236
00:08:08,689 --> 00:08:10,689
I know what your struggle is.
237
00:08:10,691 --> 00:08:14,659
And I can bring you home,
but you've got to trust me.
238
00:08:14,661 --> 00:08:17,028
- Okay. Yeah.
239
00:08:17,030 --> 00:08:19,764
- Great. Now, I've got
to get some sleep.
240
00:08:19,766 --> 00:08:22,133
You're welcome to stay here
and work the case if you want.
241
00:08:22,135 --> 00:08:23,168
- Thanks, partner.
242
00:08:23,170 --> 00:08:25,937
I promise I won't
disturb you at all.
243
00:08:26,874 --> 00:08:30,041
Whuuuhhhh.
244
00:08:30,043 --> 00:08:33,044
Whuuuhhhh.
245
00:08:33,046 --> 00:08:34,746
- Hey, Pimento.
- Huh?
246
00:08:34,748 --> 00:08:36,615
- I thought you were just gonna
be looking through the files
247
00:08:36,617 --> 00:08:37,816
or something, man.
- Sorry, brother.
248
00:08:37,818 --> 00:08:39,885
Tai chi helps
keep the demons at bay.
249
00:08:39,887 --> 00:08:41,152
- Right.
250
00:08:41,154 --> 00:08:43,088
And...
251
00:08:43,090 --> 00:08:44,523
Do you have to do it
in your underwear?
252
00:08:44,525 --> 00:08:46,642
- I can't take them off,
253
00:08:46,643 --> 00:08:48,760
'cause then you'd be looking
right at my penis and testicles.
254
00:08:48,762 --> 00:08:51,663
- Can't argue with that logic.
Mm-kay.
255
00:08:54,001 --> 00:08:56,301
- Why is there
so much garbage in here?
256
00:08:56,303 --> 00:08:58,803
- [sighs] Mean Marge
won't clean up the stew.
257
00:08:58,805 --> 00:09:01,206
And also, she suspended
our trash service.
258
00:09:01,208 --> 00:09:02,641
- What happened?
259
00:09:02,643 --> 00:09:04,242
You didn't grovel enough,
did you?
260
00:09:04,244 --> 00:09:06,978
- Seriously, Amy,
you're gonna ask Charles Boyle
261
00:09:06,980 --> 00:09:09,114
if he groveled enough?
Come on!
262
00:09:09,116 --> 00:09:10,815
- This is the grossest thing
I've ever seen,
263
00:09:10,817 --> 00:09:12,584
and I have three kids
under the age of four.
264
00:09:12,586 --> 00:09:14,052
I live in a house of fluids.
265
00:09:14,054 --> 00:09:15,854
- Look, I have a plan, okay?
266
00:09:15,856 --> 00:09:17,756
We're just gonna go over
Mean Marge's head
267
00:09:17,758 --> 00:09:18,757
and we're gonna tell Holt.
268
00:09:18,759 --> 00:09:19,925
- Tell me what?
269
00:09:19,927 --> 00:09:21,293
- Oh, well, I don't know
if you noticed,
270
00:09:21,295 --> 00:09:23,295
but there was an accident
in the break room yesterday.
271
00:09:23,297 --> 00:09:26,898
- Oh, yes, shattered windows,
bones everywhere.
272
00:09:26,900 --> 00:09:29,701
It's very "New York in the 70s."
Clean it up.
273
00:09:29,703 --> 00:09:31,903
- The, uh, problem...
274
00:09:31,905 --> 00:09:35,206
is Marge in facilities
is refusing to help.
275
00:09:35,208 --> 00:09:37,776
- We were actually hoping
maybe you could ask her.
276
00:09:37,778 --> 00:09:39,228
- Excuse me?
277
00:09:39,229 --> 00:09:40,679
I'm the captain
of this precinct.
278
00:09:40,681 --> 00:09:43,348
I don't have time to mediate
your petty squabbles.
279
00:09:43,350 --> 00:09:46,585
I've taken a sacred oath
to protect this community,
280
00:09:46,587 --> 00:09:49,087
and that is a job
I take seriously.
281
00:09:49,089 --> 00:09:50,589
- So you're afraid of her, too,
huh?
282
00:09:50,591 --> 00:09:51,690
- Terrified.
283
00:09:55,596 --> 00:09:57,796
- Yeah, perp knew
where the camera was.
284
00:09:57,798 --> 00:09:59,164
Must have cased the joint
ahead of time.
285
00:09:59,166 --> 00:10:01,032
We're gonna need all your
footage from the past week.
286
00:10:01,034 --> 00:10:03,835
- Ha-ha-ha.
This is an amateur job.
287
00:10:03,837 --> 00:10:05,637
Everybody knows you break in
when the owner's there.
288
00:10:05,639 --> 00:10:07,272
That way you have guaranteed
access to the safe,
289
00:10:07,274 --> 00:10:09,207
and you can kick his teeth in
to send a message.
290
00:10:09,209 --> 00:10:10,909
- Okay, why don't you just...
291
00:10:10,911 --> 00:10:12,344
- Oh, sure, you could
slit his throat, but then
292
00:10:12,346 --> 00:10:13,812
what are you going to do
with all the blood?
293
00:10:13,814 --> 00:10:16,181
- Uh, we'd leave it in his body,
where blood lives,
294
00:10:16,183 --> 00:10:18,000
because we're cops.
295
00:10:18,001 --> 00:10:19,818
- Oh, right, we're cops.
And don't worry, sir.
296
00:10:19,820 --> 00:10:21,653
We're gonna
catch these bastards,
297
00:10:21,655 --> 00:10:24,189
or my name isn't Paul Sneed.
- Adrian Pimento.
298
00:10:24,191 --> 00:10:26,658
- Adrian Pimento.
So, what'd they take?
299
00:10:26,660 --> 00:10:28,660
- About $15,000 worth of stuff.
300
00:10:28,662 --> 00:10:31,396
TVs, cameras,
bunch of pre-paid cell phones.
301
00:10:31,398 --> 00:10:33,264
- Ooh, you sell burner phones?
302
00:10:33,266 --> 00:10:35,066
What kind of deals
you got on those?
303
00:10:35,068 --> 00:10:36,852
- Why do you want
to know about the deals?
304
00:10:36,853 --> 00:10:38,637
- Just gathering evidence
for the case,
305
00:10:38,639 --> 00:10:40,071
'cause I'm a cop, remember?
306
00:10:40,073 --> 00:10:42,674
Detective Paul Sneed.
- Adrian Pimento.
307
00:10:42,676 --> 00:10:46,711
- Adrian Piment--I--I know who I
am--you know what--forget this!
308
00:10:46,713 --> 00:10:47,712
- Ah--okay.
309
00:10:47,714 --> 00:10:49,814
- [grunting]
310
00:10:49,816 --> 00:10:52,417
- Hey, hey, hey, come on, man.
311
00:10:52,419 --> 00:10:55,420
Look, I get it...
you're still tense.
312
00:10:55,422 --> 00:10:57,188
When I came back
from being undercover,
313
00:10:57,190 --> 00:10:58,790
they made me see a shrink.
314
00:10:58,792 --> 00:11:00,692
But then he told me I had
dad issues, and I was like,
315
00:11:00,694 --> 00:11:02,060
"You know what,
you can't tell me what to do,
316
00:11:02,062 --> 00:11:04,029
you're not my dad,"
so he was a moron.
317
00:11:04,031 --> 00:11:05,964
- No, you know what, that's good
advice--thanks, man, thanks.
318
00:11:05,966 --> 00:11:08,066
I--I'll be right back,
I just left something inside.
319
00:11:10,971 --> 00:11:12,804
Hey, give me one of those.
320
00:11:12,806 --> 00:11:16,141
- Why are you buying
a burner phone?
321
00:11:16,143 --> 00:11:18,009
- Cue smoke machine.
322
00:11:18,011 --> 00:11:20,445
And...action Holt.
323
00:11:22,382 --> 00:11:25,216
- Welcome to the Nine-Nine.
I'm Captain Raymond Holt.
324
00:11:25,218 --> 00:11:27,318
- And I'm
Detective Rosa Diaz.
325
00:11:27,320 --> 00:11:29,320
I don't understand why
I'm on a wheelchair.
326
00:11:29,322 --> 00:11:30,989
- Cut!
327
00:11:30,991 --> 00:11:34,325
For the last time, Rosa, through
the magic of special effects,
328
00:11:34,327 --> 00:11:36,928
the wheelchair
will turn into a horse,
329
00:11:36,930 --> 00:11:38,997
but I need you to work with me.
330
00:11:38,999 --> 00:11:41,099
Give me a little "hee-yah!"
Hee-yah!
331
00:11:41,101 --> 00:11:42,768
- This is idiotic.
332
00:11:42,769 --> 00:11:44,436
- Maybe because you didn't
karate chop your way
333
00:11:44,438 --> 00:11:46,738
through the smoke, as scripted.
334
00:11:46,740 --> 00:11:47,872
- I'm out.
Scully.
335
00:11:47,874 --> 00:11:49,074
- Rosa!
336
00:11:49,076 --> 00:11:51,142
- Hee-yah, hee-yah.
337
00:11:51,144 --> 00:11:52,343
- I wanted a simple,
straightforward
338
00:11:52,345 --> 00:11:54,362
video tour of the precinct,
339
00:11:54,363 --> 00:11:56,380
and you've added the one
ingredient I didn't want:
340
00:11:56,383 --> 00:11:57,382
pizzazz.
341
00:11:57,384 --> 00:11:59,951
- Pizzazz is who I am.
342
00:11:59,953 --> 00:12:02,921
Would you tell the sky
to stop being so blue?
343
00:12:02,923 --> 00:12:04,489
- Yes. I wish it were tan.
- What?
344
00:12:04,491 --> 00:12:06,958
- It's my favorite color.
It's no-nonsense.
345
00:12:06,960 --> 00:12:08,993
- Hey, I've been
tailing Pimento,
346
00:12:08,995 --> 00:12:10,328
and I think you were right.
347
00:12:10,330 --> 00:12:12,063
There's something weird going on with that guy.
348
00:12:12,065 --> 00:12:13,498
- I knew it. Ugh!
349
00:12:13,500 --> 00:12:15,233
I can't believe
I'm gonna sleep with him.
350
00:12:15,235 --> 00:12:17,469
- Well, you don't have to.
351
00:12:17,471 --> 00:12:18,903
- No, I'm gonna.
352
00:12:18,905 --> 00:12:20,939
- He secretly
bought a burner phone,
353
00:12:20,941 --> 00:12:22,140
he broke into my apartment
354
00:12:22,142 --> 00:12:23,441
and he keeps forgetting he's a cop
355
00:12:23,443 --> 00:12:25,376
and calling himself
by his alias, Paul Sneed.
356
00:12:25,378 --> 00:12:26,811
- Paul Sneed?
357
00:12:26,813 --> 00:12:28,513
- He said Figgis has spies in the NYPD.
358
00:12:28,515 --> 00:12:31,182
Rosa, what if he's one of them?
What if he turned?
359
00:12:31,184 --> 00:12:33,118
Oh, here he comes.
360
00:12:33,120 --> 00:12:35,353
Oh, man, bolt cutters?
361
00:12:35,355 --> 00:12:36,788
Bolt cutters have literally
362
00:12:36,790 --> 00:12:38,223
never been used by
an innocent person.
363
00:12:38,225 --> 00:12:39,758
- I use them all the time
when I make jewelry.
364
00:12:39,760 --> 00:12:41,159
- What?
Oh, my God.
365
00:12:41,161 --> 00:12:42,360
Follow-up questions later.
366
00:12:42,362 --> 00:12:43,528
All right, I got to
keep following him.
367
00:12:43,530 --> 00:12:45,163
- All right, but be careful.
368
00:12:45,165 --> 00:12:47,899
- Oh, don't worry about me.
I'll be invisible.
369
00:12:47,901 --> 00:12:49,934
Now you see me, now you--
[car engine revs]
370
00:12:49,936 --> 00:12:51,936
- โช 'Cause here's my number โช
- Ah--
371
00:12:51,938 --> 00:12:53,204
- โช So call me maybe โช
372
00:12:53,206 --> 00:12:55,473
[music stops]
- We're cool, we're cool.
373
00:12:55,475 --> 00:12:57,442
Everything's still cool.
He didn't hear me, we're cool.
374
00:13:04,217 --> 00:13:05,283
[phone pad beeps]
375
00:13:06,253 --> 00:13:07,285
- Rosa.
376
00:13:07,287 --> 00:13:08,520
Pimento just put on a ski mask
377
00:13:08,522 --> 00:13:10,488
and broke into a creepy abandoned warehouse.
378
00:13:10,490 --> 00:13:11,489
- Mm, that's hot.
379
00:13:11,491 --> 00:13:12,991
- It is?
380
00:13:12,993 --> 00:13:14,159
Oh, wait, he's coming back out.
381
00:13:14,161 --> 00:13:15,827
- Did he do something super shady?
382
00:13:15,829 --> 00:13:16,928
Are his eyes all wild?
383
00:13:16,930 --> 00:13:18,496
- Rosa, focus.
- Sorry.
384
00:13:18,498 --> 00:13:20,165
Send a pic. Bye.
385
00:13:20,167 --> 00:13:22,033
- Okay,
guess we're done talking.
386
00:13:24,871 --> 00:13:27,272
- Well, they still haven't
cleaned up in there,
387
00:13:27,274 --> 00:13:29,941
but the good news is
I got a new plan.
388
00:13:29,943 --> 00:13:32,443
I let one of the perps
accidentally get out of holding,
389
00:13:32,445 --> 00:13:34,879
then I take him down
to the break room.
390
00:13:34,881 --> 00:13:37,148
Oopsie.
Now it's a whole crime scene.
391
00:13:37,150 --> 00:13:39,284
- [gasps] And then we can get
crime scene cleaners.
392
00:13:39,286 --> 00:13:41,319
- Boom.
- Not so fast.
393
00:13:41,321 --> 00:13:43,588
That room gets clean
when I say it gets cleaned.
394
00:13:43,590 --> 00:13:45,423
- You can't stop us now.
395
00:13:45,425 --> 00:13:47,292
- You ever heard
the old saying,
396
00:13:47,294 --> 00:13:49,928
"Know the garbage,
know the man?"
397
00:13:49,930 --> 00:13:50,995
- That's not a saying.
398
00:13:50,997 --> 00:13:54,232
- Yes, it is.
I know all your secrets.
399
00:13:54,234 --> 00:13:55,834
[snaps fingers]
Boyle.
400
00:13:55,836 --> 00:13:57,402
You got a taste for fast food.
401
00:13:57,404 --> 00:13:59,170
- [giggles]
Those aren't mine.
402
00:13:59,172 --> 00:14:00,905
I only eat
locally-sourced meats.
403
00:14:00,907 --> 00:14:02,307
They could be Terry's.
He was fat once, you know?
404
00:14:02,309 --> 00:14:03,875
- What the hell, Boyle?
405
00:14:03,877 --> 00:14:05,043
- Speaking of Jeffords,
406
00:14:05,045 --> 00:14:06,578
maybe your daughters
would like to know
407
00:14:06,580 --> 00:14:09,380
that their daddy throws away
all their drawings?
408
00:14:09,382 --> 00:14:11,883
- They just draw so many,
and they're all so bad.
409
00:14:11,885 --> 00:14:13,885
- And you, Santiago,
410
00:14:13,887 --> 00:14:16,020
maybe the world would like to
see that draft of a memo
411
00:14:16,022 --> 00:14:19,991
you wrote where you used
T-H-E-I-R instead of T-H-E-R-E?
412
00:14:19,993 --> 00:14:21,893
- Oh, you sick son of a bitch.
413
00:14:21,895 --> 00:14:23,161
- Why do you hate us
so much?
414
00:14:23,163 --> 00:14:25,230
- I know you call me
Mean Marge.
415
00:14:25,232 --> 00:14:27,065
Do you even know my last name?
416
00:14:27,067 --> 00:14:28,399
Hmm?
417
00:14:28,401 --> 00:14:31,302
- Mop-Bucket?
- Scully, don't guess.
418
00:14:31,304 --> 00:14:32,437
Please.
- No.
419
00:14:32,439 --> 00:14:34,005
- Guys, guys, guys, guys, guys.
420
00:14:35,175 --> 00:14:37,075
- "Mop-Bucket," Scully?
421
00:14:37,077 --> 00:14:38,509
- It was a educated guess.
422
00:14:40,413 --> 00:14:42,113
- Thanks for coming.
423
00:14:42,115 --> 00:14:44,215
Pimento put the duffel in his
trunk, parked around the corner,
424
00:14:44,217 --> 00:14:45,984
and went home; he's been doing
shirtless tai chi
425
00:14:45,986 --> 00:14:46,985
in his window ever since.
426
00:14:46,987 --> 00:14:48,319
- Which window is that?
427
00:14:51,057 --> 00:14:53,391
Mm-hmm.
- Okay.
428
00:14:53,393 --> 00:14:54,826
Look, I got to
get into that trunk.
429
00:14:54,827 --> 00:14:56,260
- And you need me
to break into the car for you?
430
00:14:56,263 --> 00:14:57,262
- What?
No, I can do it.
431
00:14:57,264 --> 00:14:58,930
Why would you say that?
432
00:14:58,932 --> 00:15:01,099
- Because one time you lost your
keys and you called a tow truck.
433
00:15:01,101 --> 00:15:03,034
- My mom pays for
roadside assistance.
434
00:15:03,036 --> 00:15:06,304
Why wouldn't I call it?
I'm doing this.
435
00:15:09,342 --> 00:15:12,911
- Okay, great take!
You guys are finally getting it.
436
00:15:12,913 --> 00:15:16,347
All right, let's go again.
Action Holt!
437
00:15:16,349 --> 00:15:18,917
- [rhythmic blowing]
438
00:15:18,919 --> 00:15:22,320
Welcome to the Nine-Nine.
I'm Captain Raymond Holt.
439
00:15:22,322 --> 00:15:25,423
- And I'm Detective Rosa Diaz.
Hee-yah.
440
00:15:25,425 --> 00:15:27,025
- The hell is this?
441
00:15:27,027 --> 00:15:30,061
- You had a pizzazz problem,
so you've been recast, sweetie.
442
00:15:30,063 --> 00:15:31,396
Welcome to Hollywood.
443
00:15:31,398 --> 00:15:34,232
You know, David here
really connected with the role.
444
00:15:34,234 --> 00:15:36,701
- The key is to invent
a backstory for your character.
445
00:15:36,703 --> 00:15:40,505
Now, my Raymond Holt is addicted
to pills, but no one knows.
446
00:15:40,507 --> 00:15:44,275
- You see, he really
understands the craft,
447
00:15:44,277 --> 00:15:47,412
whereas you and Rosa just sort
of flop around
448
00:15:47,414 --> 00:15:49,414
like a couple
of boring normals.
449
00:15:49,416 --> 00:15:51,115
- I'm sorry,
but we're detectives,
450
00:15:51,117 --> 00:15:52,951
not professional actors.
451
00:15:52,953 --> 00:15:54,185
We were trying our hardest.
452
00:15:54,187 --> 00:15:56,321
- "We were trying our hardest."
- Stop it.
453
00:15:56,323 --> 00:15:59,724
- Gina, this is a disgrace.
I'm removing you as director.
454
00:16:00,961 --> 00:16:02,260
- There he goes.
455
00:16:02,262 --> 00:16:04,062
[whispering]
Off to take more pills.
456
00:16:05,031 --> 00:16:06,331
- Oh, yeah.
457
00:16:06,333 --> 00:16:08,633
Suck it, roadside assistance.
458
00:16:08,635 --> 00:16:10,134
- Well, well, well.
459
00:16:10,136 --> 00:16:11,469
Hello, Jake.
460
00:16:11,471 --> 00:16:14,005
- Adrian, what a coincidence
bumping into you here.
461
00:16:14,007 --> 00:16:15,006
Well, see you tomorrow.
462
00:16:15,008 --> 00:16:16,207
[gun cocks]
463
00:16:16,209 --> 00:16:17,308
You know what,
let's hang out now.
464
00:16:17,310 --> 00:16:18,443
I was thinking
the exact same thing.
465
00:16:18,445 --> 00:16:20,111
[laughs]
466
00:16:20,113 --> 00:16:21,245
- What are you doing here,
partner?
467
00:16:21,247 --> 00:16:22,246
- Pimento's still in the window.
468
00:16:22,248 --> 00:16:23,581
- Come on, Jake.
469
00:16:23,583 --> 00:16:25,750
You honestly didn't assume
I would hire a look-alike
470
00:16:25,752 --> 00:16:28,219
to wear a fake beard
and do tai chi in my window?
471
00:16:28,221 --> 00:16:30,054
- No, I definitely
didn't assume that.
472
00:16:30,056 --> 00:16:31,656
- And plus, you seriously
thought that was me?
473
00:16:31,658 --> 00:16:33,324
I mean, you've seen me
in my underpants.
474
00:16:33,326 --> 00:16:35,193
My butt is rock hard.
475
00:16:35,195 --> 00:16:36,594
That guy's got
a pancake butt.
476
00:16:36,596 --> 00:16:38,363
- I can't believe you're still
working for Figgis.
477
00:16:38,365 --> 00:16:39,731
That's why you've been
acting so weird.
478
00:16:39,733 --> 00:16:41,499
Breaking into my apartment,
buying a burner phone,
479
00:16:41,501 --> 00:16:43,201
grabbing this duffel.
480
00:16:43,203 --> 00:16:44,736
- I broke into your apartment
'cause I didn't feel safe
481
00:16:44,738 --> 00:16:46,304
at my home.
- Okay.
482
00:16:46,306 --> 00:16:48,072
- And a burner phone is
the only kind of phone I can get
483
00:16:48,074 --> 00:16:49,574
because I disappeared
for 12 years,
484
00:16:49,576 --> 00:16:51,642
and now have terrible credit.
- Makes sense.
485
00:16:51,644 --> 00:16:53,544
- You want to know
what's in the duffel?
486
00:16:53,546 --> 00:16:55,313
Open it up, tough guy.
487
00:16:55,315 --> 00:16:57,148
- [sighs]
488
00:16:57,150 --> 00:16:59,150
- Oh, look at that.
489
00:16:59,152 --> 00:17:02,487
A bunch of old family photos
and personal belongings.
490
00:17:02,489 --> 00:17:04,055
- Pimento's mementos.
491
00:17:04,057 --> 00:17:05,623
I know you have a gun on me.
492
00:17:05,624 --> 00:17:07,190
I just couldn't
resist the rhyme, sorry.
493
00:17:07,193 --> 00:17:09,160
- I stashed it all
when I became Paul Sneed.
494
00:17:09,162 --> 00:17:10,695
I couldn't have them
finding anything
495
00:17:10,697 --> 00:17:12,063
that could
trace back to my family.
496
00:17:12,065 --> 00:17:13,364
- I get it, all right?
497
00:17:13,366 --> 00:17:15,166
I went through the exact
same thing when I came back--
498
00:17:15,168 --> 00:17:18,102
- You have no clue
what I've been through!
499
00:17:18,104 --> 00:17:20,338
You know what?
500
00:17:20,340 --> 00:17:22,206
I can't believe
I trusted you.
501
00:17:23,476 --> 00:17:24,742
- Okay.
502
00:17:24,744 --> 00:17:27,145
- Just get out of here, Jake.
503
00:17:27,147 --> 00:17:29,147
- Oh, my God, this guy's got a pancake butt.
504
00:17:29,149 --> 00:17:31,349
It's not Pimento.
Get out of there, Jake!
505
00:17:31,351 --> 00:17:32,683
- Thanks, Rosa.
506
00:17:35,355 --> 00:17:37,155
- So Detective Pimento
didn't show up for work today.
507
00:17:37,157 --> 00:17:38,289
Any idea why?
508
00:17:38,291 --> 00:17:39,757
- Oh, yeah, I straight up
drove him off.
509
00:17:39,759 --> 00:17:41,626
Big screw-up on my part.
510
00:17:41,628 --> 00:17:43,561
I'm trying this new thing
where I just own my mistakes.
511
00:17:43,563 --> 00:17:45,229
I like it. Do you?
- I did.
512
00:17:45,231 --> 00:17:47,065
Until you bragged about it.
- Yeah.
513
00:17:47,067 --> 00:17:48,332
- Pimento left his gun
and badge on my desk,
514
00:17:48,334 --> 00:17:50,701
along with a note reading,
"I can't do this.
515
00:17:50,703 --> 00:17:52,537
I'm better off as a bagman."
516
00:17:52,539 --> 00:17:53,771
- Oh, no.
517
00:17:53,773 --> 00:17:55,440
- You think he went back
to work with Figgis?
518
00:17:55,442 --> 00:17:56,441
- Worse.
519
00:17:56,443 --> 00:17:58,209
- Fine, single bag it.
520
00:17:58,211 --> 00:18:00,344
It's your funeral,
you dumb son of a bitch.
521
00:18:00,346 --> 00:18:02,613
Get out of here.
522
00:18:02,615 --> 00:18:03,648
Idiot.
523
00:18:04,784 --> 00:18:05,850
- Hey, partner.
524
00:18:05,852 --> 00:18:07,385
- Bag boys don't have partners.
525
00:18:07,387 --> 00:18:08,586
- Actually,
cashiers and bag boys
526
00:18:08,588 --> 00:18:10,088
need to be totally in sync--
527
00:18:10,090 --> 00:18:11,522
- Shut up, Maggie.
528
00:18:11,524 --> 00:18:13,724
- Look, man, you sacrificed
12 years of your life
529
00:18:13,726 --> 00:18:15,860
for the police department;
you're a hero.
530
00:18:15,862 --> 00:18:17,862
I'm sorry that
I didn't trust you.
531
00:18:17,864 --> 00:18:20,198
- Yeah. Me too.
532
00:18:20,200 --> 00:18:23,734
- Look, can I tell you something
I've never told anyone before?
533
00:18:23,736 --> 00:18:28,239
My time undercover in the Mafia
was actually kind of lame.
534
00:18:28,241 --> 00:18:30,374
I mean, I wanted it
to be badass,
535
00:18:30,376 --> 00:18:32,310
but I'm good at computers,
so I mostly just helped them
536
00:18:32,312 --> 00:18:33,578
switch over from AOL.
537
00:18:33,580 --> 00:18:36,681
I have no idea
what you're going through.
538
00:18:36,683 --> 00:18:39,584
And I want to tell you that it's
all gonna go back to normal,
539
00:18:39,586 --> 00:18:41,552
but honestly, I have no clue.
540
00:18:44,124 --> 00:18:46,224
Anyways, the footage came back
on that B&E,
541
00:18:46,226 --> 00:18:47,658
and we've got a suspect.
542
00:18:47,660 --> 00:18:50,161
I'm going to bust him right now
if you want to come with me.
543
00:18:52,432 --> 00:18:53,698
- Why don't you
give me those eggs?
544
00:18:53,700 --> 00:18:54,899
I'll put them on top here.
545
00:18:56,236 --> 00:18:57,869
- Okay.
546
00:18:57,871 --> 00:18:59,704
- What was that about?
What happened to you?
547
00:18:59,706 --> 00:19:01,205
- Maggie, butt out!
548
00:19:01,207 --> 00:19:03,207
Okay?
This is my life!
549
00:19:03,209 --> 00:19:04,509
- So I just received word
550
00:19:04,511 --> 00:19:06,344
from our friend
at the Guffin Foundation.
551
00:19:06,346 --> 00:19:08,646
Apparently they loved
our video submission.
552
00:19:08,648 --> 00:19:10,214
What did you send them?
553
00:19:10,216 --> 00:19:12,350
- A cinematic masterpiece
is what I sent them.
554
00:19:12,352 --> 00:19:13,718
- Did it feature pizzazz?
555
00:19:13,720 --> 00:19:15,620
- No, none at all, sir.
556
00:19:15,622 --> 00:19:18,156
First, I couldn't wrap my head
around that concept,
557
00:19:18,158 --> 00:19:19,590
but then I realized:
558
00:19:19,592 --> 00:19:21,893
do you know which dogs get
the most likes on the internet?
559
00:19:21,895 --> 00:19:23,528
- Anatolian Shepherds.
560
00:19:23,530 --> 00:19:25,897
- No, ugly little runts
561
00:19:25,899 --> 00:19:29,901
with wonky eyes and tongues that
won't stay in their mouths.
562
00:19:29,903 --> 00:19:31,369
- But the Anatolian Shepherd
563
00:19:31,371 --> 00:19:32,770
is unrivaled
for protecting livestock.
564
00:19:32,772 --> 00:19:34,539
- I was trying to wow them,
565
00:19:34,541 --> 00:19:38,476
and I should have just been
showcasing our wonk-eye.
566
00:19:38,478 --> 00:19:39,877
- โช I will remember you โช
567
00:19:39,879 --> 00:19:43,181
- We were trying our hardest, but this is a disgrace.
568
00:19:43,183 --> 00:19:45,316
[echoing] Disgrace, disgrace.
569
00:19:45,318 --> 00:19:47,285
Help us. Stop it.
570
00:19:48,621 --> 00:19:52,523
- And that's real audio of
your very-real diva meltdown.
571
00:19:52,525 --> 00:19:55,593
You might just make it
as an actor after all.
572
00:19:55,595 --> 00:19:56,827
- Well done, Linetti.
573
00:19:56,829 --> 00:19:57,929
- Sergeant Linetti.
574
00:19:57,931 --> 00:20:00,298
I had the fake Holt
give me a promotion.
575
00:20:00,300 --> 00:20:02,266
He signed the papers
and everything.
576
00:20:03,736 --> 00:20:04,969
- What do you want?
577
00:20:04,971 --> 00:20:07,638
- To tell you that we will
officially be renaming
578
00:20:07,640 --> 00:20:13,311
the fourth-floor break room
"The Marge Bronigan Break Room."
579
00:20:13,313 --> 00:20:14,579
- Well.
580
00:20:14,581 --> 00:20:15,913
Looks like somebody
did their homework.
581
00:20:15,915 --> 00:20:17,548
- It was me.
I did it.
582
00:20:17,550 --> 00:20:19,083
- So what's the catch?
583
00:20:19,084 --> 00:20:20,617
- The ceremony
starts in two hours.
584
00:20:20,620 --> 00:20:23,487
Now, I know our squad
is not in the janitor's union,
585
00:20:23,489 --> 00:20:25,223
but it'd sure be nice
if we were allowed
586
00:20:25,225 --> 00:20:27,525
to clean the place up
before then.
587
00:20:28,995 --> 00:20:30,695
We cleaned up the stew,
588
00:20:30,697 --> 00:20:36,300
which means the Marge Bronigan
Break Room is open for business!
589
00:20:36,302 --> 00:20:39,370
- Okay, we'll take out your
trash, do normal cleaning,
590
00:20:39,372 --> 00:20:40,638
but no big messes.
591
00:20:40,640 --> 00:20:42,640
- Great!
Time for the christening.
592
00:20:42,642 --> 00:20:43,874
[pop]
[glass shatters]
593
00:20:43,876 --> 00:20:46,244
[overlapping chatter, commotion]
594
00:20:46,246 --> 00:20:47,979
- Oh, crap.
595
00:20:47,981 --> 00:20:49,313
[all gasp, shout]
596
00:20:51,851 --> 00:20:53,751
Congratulations.
597
00:20:53,753 --> 00:20:56,887
- Perp is on the third floor.
Everyone know your assignment?
598
00:20:56,889 --> 00:20:58,356
- Mind if I tag along?
599
00:20:58,358 --> 00:20:59,624
- Pimento?
600
00:20:59,626 --> 00:21:00,758
- I thought about it.
601
00:21:00,760 --> 00:21:02,493
If you say things
will get back to normal,
602
00:21:02,495 --> 00:21:04,895
then I trust you.
603
00:21:04,897 --> 00:21:06,430
- All right.
604
00:21:06,432 --> 00:21:07,431
Let's do this.
605
00:21:07,433 --> 00:21:09,967
You're with me, partner.
606
00:21:09,969 --> 00:21:12,370
[guns cock]
NYPD! You're under arrest!
607
00:21:12,372 --> 00:21:13,971
- You're gonna die!
608
00:21:13,973 --> 00:21:15,773
- No, Pimento!
No!
609
00:21:15,775 --> 00:21:17,775
- Not a doctor. Shh.
610
00:21:17,777 --> 00:21:19,310
- Fremulon.
610
00:21:20,305 --> 00:22:20,679
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