All language subtitles for Brooklyn.Nine-Nine.S03E17.720p.AMZN.WEBRip.x264-GalaxyTV

af Afrikaans
ak Akan
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bem Bemba
bn Bengali
bh Bihari
bs Bosnian
br Breton
km Cambodian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
chr Cherokee
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
ee Ewe
fo Faroese
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fy Frisian
gaa Ga
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gn Guarani
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ia Interlingua
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
rw Kinyarwanda
rn Kirundi
kg Kongo
ko Korean
kri Krio (Sierra Leone)
ku Kurdish
ckb Kurdish (Soranรฎ)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Laothian
la Latin
lv Latvian
ln Lingala
lt Lithuanian
loz Lozi
lg Luganda
ach Luo
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mfe Mauritian Creole
mo Moldavian
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
sr-ME Montenegrin
ne Nepali
pcm Nigerian Pidgin
nso Northern Sotho
no Norwegian
nn Norwegian (Nynorsk)
oc Occitan
or Oriya
om Oromo
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt-BR Portuguese (Brazil)
pt Portuguese (Portugal)
pa Punjabi
qu Quechua
ro Romanian
rm Romansh
nyn Runyakitara
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
sh Serbo-Croatian
st Sesotho
tn Setswana
crs Seychellois Creole
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhalese
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es-419 Spanish (Latin American)
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
tt Tatar
te Telugu
th Thai
ti Tigrinya
to Tonga
lua Tshiluba
tum Tumbuka
tr Turkish
tk Turkmen
tw Twi
ug Uighur
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
wo Wolof
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,736 --> 00:00:03,068 - Hey Jake, can I show you 2 00:00:03,070 --> 00:00:04,236 something over here? - Sure thing, bud. 3 00:00:04,238 --> 00:00:05,454 - I'm trying to send Genevieve a sexy pic. 4 00:00:05,455 --> 00:00:06,671 Does this make my bubble butt pop? 5 00:00:06,674 --> 00:00:08,107 - Nope. I'm out. 6 00:00:11,178 --> 00:00:14,446 [whispers] Who's that? - [whispers] I don't know. 7 00:00:14,448 --> 00:00:17,616 - Um, excuse me, pal. Think you're at my desk. 8 00:00:17,618 --> 00:00:19,118 - Whoa, whoa, whoa! 9 00:00:19,120 --> 00:00:20,185 - Drop it! Drop the weapon! 10 00:00:20,187 --> 00:00:21,320 - Don't be a dum-dum. 11 00:00:21,322 --> 00:00:23,622 - Squad, meet Detective Adrian Pimento. 12 00:00:23,624 --> 00:00:25,591 He's been deep undercover for the last 12 years, 13 00:00:25,593 --> 00:00:29,161 but he's just resurfaced, and he's rejoining the Nine-Nine. 14 00:00:29,163 --> 00:00:31,630 - That...is... 15 00:00:31,632 --> 00:00:33,232 awesome! 16 00:00:33,234 --> 00:00:36,235 [rock music] 17 00:00:36,237 --> 00:00:44,276 โ™ช โ™ช 18 00:00:46,000 --> 00:00:52,074 Advertise your product or brand here contact www.OpenSubtitles.org today 19 00:00:53,220 --> 00:00:55,187 - Some of you just met Detective Pimento, 20 00:00:55,189 --> 00:00:57,623 and, of course, some of you knew him before he went undercover. 21 00:00:57,625 --> 00:01:01,193 - Hitchcock and Scully. Ha. You guys still work here? 22 00:01:01,195 --> 00:01:03,796 - The only way they're getting rid of us is in a body bag. 23 00:01:03,798 --> 00:01:06,632 - It actually happened once, but it was a false alarm. 24 00:01:06,634 --> 00:01:09,201 - Detective Pimento will be returning to his old desk. 25 00:01:09,203 --> 00:01:11,370 Peralta will temporarily be moved to the break room. 26 00:01:11,372 --> 00:01:12,404 Questions? 27 00:01:12,406 --> 00:01:13,572 - What'd you do undercover? 28 00:01:13,574 --> 00:01:15,140 - I worked for Jimmy "The Butcher" Figgis. 29 00:01:15,142 --> 00:01:17,676 - That is an A-list mobster. Tell me literally everything. 30 00:01:17,678 --> 00:01:19,478 Everyone, shut up! 31 00:01:19,479 --> 00:01:21,279 - Pretty much just a bagman for him. 32 00:01:21,282 --> 00:01:23,248 I mean, I did some other stuff. 33 00:01:23,250 --> 00:01:25,484 [grunting] 34 00:01:25,486 --> 00:01:28,520 [crying] 35 00:01:30,491 --> 00:01:34,093 - Um, we usually try to tell funnier little stories. 36 00:01:34,095 --> 00:01:35,360 - Well, there's nothing funny about what I did 37 00:01:35,362 --> 00:01:36,578 for The Butcher. 38 00:01:36,579 --> 00:01:37,795 I've had to learn not to blink, 39 00:01:37,798 --> 00:01:40,566 because every time I close my eyes, I see a fresh horror. 40 00:01:40,568 --> 00:01:41,633 - Ooh, dark. 41 00:01:41,635 --> 00:01:42,801 - But how do you keep your eyes moist? 42 00:01:42,803 --> 00:01:44,236 - Actually, I have 43 00:01:44,238 --> 00:01:46,371 a very funny story about keeping my eyes moist. 44 00:01:46,373 --> 00:01:49,408 [grunting] 45 00:01:51,445 --> 00:01:53,512 [laughs] 46 00:01:53,514 --> 00:01:55,247 Come on... [laughing] 47 00:01:55,249 --> 00:01:56,248 - Nope. 48 00:01:56,250 --> 00:01:57,516 Still not getting that vibe, man. 49 00:01:57,518 --> 00:01:58,851 - Really? - Mm-mm. 50 00:01:58,853 --> 00:02:01,120 - I'll get there. That's my bad, everybody. 51 00:02:01,122 --> 00:02:02,421 - Dismissed. 52 00:02:03,524 --> 00:02:06,758 - Sir, can I partner with Pimento on my B&E? 53 00:02:06,760 --> 00:02:07,860 That guy is awesome. 54 00:02:07,862 --> 00:02:09,528 He's like a real life Donnie Brasco. 55 00:02:09,530 --> 00:02:12,531 - Isn't Donnie Brasco a really sad movie that ends terribly? 56 00:02:12,533 --> 00:02:13,732 - Yeah, but he's got that cool jacket, 57 00:02:13,734 --> 00:02:15,167 and he's always down at the docks. 58 00:02:15,168 --> 00:02:16,601 - I'm not sure I want you working with Pimento. 59 00:02:16,604 --> 00:02:17,803 He's a little unstable. 60 00:02:17,805 --> 00:02:19,371 [banging] 61 00:02:19,373 --> 00:02:21,306 - Machine! 62 00:02:21,308 --> 00:02:24,276 - Psychologically, this could be a very difficult transition. 63 00:02:24,278 --> 00:02:25,711 - Yeah, I know, I went undercover. 64 00:02:25,713 --> 00:02:27,713 63 days, no big deal. You probably forgot. 65 00:02:27,715 --> 00:02:29,515 - No, it's your outgoing voice mail message. 66 00:02:29,517 --> 00:02:30,549 - Hey, it's Jake. 67 00:02:30,551 --> 00:02:31,884 Can't get to the phone right now. 68 00:02:31,886 --> 00:02:35,254 I might be undercover again, like I was for 63 days. 69 00:02:35,256 --> 00:02:36,421 Bye! 70 00:02:36,423 --> 00:02:38,657 Look, I know what he's going through. 71 00:02:38,659 --> 00:02:40,826 Let me be the man that brings him in from the cold. 72 00:02:40,828 --> 00:02:42,794 - All right, he can work the B&E with you. 73 00:02:42,796 --> 00:02:44,696 Just make sure you take it easy. 74 00:02:44,698 --> 00:02:47,332 - Uh, sir, I was 20 minutes late for work today. 75 00:02:47,334 --> 00:02:49,535 I don't think you need to tell me about taking it easy. 76 00:02:49,537 --> 00:02:51,837 - Are you bragging about being a bad employee? 77 00:02:53,507 --> 00:02:55,507 - No. 78 00:02:55,509 --> 00:02:57,276 Dismissed? Me? 79 00:02:57,278 --> 00:02:59,378 - I figured out the best way 80 00:02:59,380 --> 00:03:01,446 to welcome Pimento to the Nine-Nine. 81 00:03:01,448 --> 00:03:03,949 - Stay out of his way, maybe buy him a drink, 82 00:03:03,951 --> 00:03:05,551 not do anything weird? 83 00:03:05,553 --> 00:03:07,252 - I'm making him a goat stew. 84 00:03:07,254 --> 00:03:08,954 - Huh...all right. 85 00:03:08,956 --> 00:03:11,823 - Yeah, now, this Turkmenistani dish 86 00:03:11,825 --> 00:03:15,260 is traditionally made from an animal that's been so overfed 87 00:03:15,262 --> 00:03:16,762 it can no longer stand. 88 00:03:16,764 --> 00:03:18,397 - [whistles] That's the dream. 89 00:03:18,399 --> 00:03:19,698 - Everything is authentic. 90 00:03:19,700 --> 00:03:21,633 I even ordered the pressure cooker 91 00:03:21,635 --> 00:03:22,968 from Turkmenistan. 92 00:03:22,969 --> 00:03:24,302 - So you're on a terrorist watch list now? 93 00:03:24,305 --> 00:03:26,638 - Oh, yeah, Homeland Security's been in my house, yep. 94 00:03:26,640 --> 00:03:29,942 Now, this just needs to cook for another 11 hours, 32 minutes, 95 00:03:29,944 --> 00:03:32,711 and 6-- [boom] 96 00:03:33,881 --> 00:03:37,382 - What the hell, Boyle! You almost killed me! 97 00:03:37,384 --> 00:03:39,618 I'm not going out in a stew-making accident! 98 00:03:39,620 --> 00:03:41,753 Terry's gonna die saving the President, 99 00:03:41,755 --> 00:03:43,822 or Terry's never gonna die! 100 00:03:43,824 --> 00:03:46,592 - There's no way we can clean this up by ourselves. 101 00:03:46,594 --> 00:03:47,893 We're gonna need help. 102 00:03:47,895 --> 00:03:49,528 - No, no, no, no, no, no, no. 103 00:03:49,530 --> 00:03:51,163 What are you saying? 104 00:03:51,164 --> 00:03:52,797 - You know what she's saying, man. 105 00:03:52,800 --> 00:03:54,733 - Oh, no. 106 00:03:54,735 --> 00:03:56,368 Mean Marge. 107 00:03:56,370 --> 00:03:58,503 - So we're supposed to come running to clean up your mess 108 00:03:58,505 --> 00:04:00,706 every time you snap your fat little fingers? 109 00:04:00,708 --> 00:04:02,341 - Oh, no, no, I actually can't snap my fingers, 110 00:04:02,343 --> 00:04:03,442 they're always too wet. 111 00:04:03,444 --> 00:04:04,910 And I just thought, since it's your job-- 112 00:04:04,912 --> 00:04:06,578 - Oh, I see. 113 00:04:06,580 --> 00:04:08,797 You cops think you're too good to clean up after yourselves? 114 00:04:08,798 --> 00:04:11,015 - Uh--no, I can do it myself, I'll just-- 115 00:04:11,018 --> 00:04:12,551 - That's union work! 116 00:04:12,553 --> 00:04:15,654 How dare you try to steal our jobs. 117 00:04:15,656 --> 00:04:17,656 - So where do we go from here? 118 00:04:17,658 --> 00:04:19,625 - Well, you know the old saying, 119 00:04:19,627 --> 00:04:22,894 "The only way to unclog a toilet is to let it sit." 120 00:04:22,896 --> 00:04:24,930 - You're a janitor. You should know that's not true. 121 00:04:24,932 --> 00:04:26,832 - Boys, take out the trash. 122 00:04:26,834 --> 00:04:28,600 - Oh, great! So you will do it? 123 00:04:28,602 --> 00:04:29,835 Oh! I'm the trash, I get it. 124 00:04:29,837 --> 00:04:31,536 Okay, that makes more sense with your tone. 125 00:04:31,538 --> 00:04:32,537 [metal chair skidding] 126 00:04:32,539 --> 00:04:34,806 Oops! Oh...[laughs] Love you, Marge. 127 00:04:34,808 --> 00:04:36,708 - You wanted to see me, sir? 128 00:04:36,710 --> 00:04:38,543 - Yes, I have a special project for you. 129 00:04:38,545 --> 00:04:39,878 - Okay, but I'll have you know right now 130 00:04:39,880 --> 00:04:41,613 I only fly first class. 131 00:04:41,615 --> 00:04:42,948 - I'm not flying you anywhere. 132 00:04:42,950 --> 00:04:45,484 I made an application to the M.C. Guffin Foundation 133 00:04:45,486 --> 00:04:47,419 for a grant to upgrade our office equipment. 134 00:04:47,421 --> 00:04:50,289 Unfortunately, they require a video submission. 135 00:04:50,291 --> 00:04:52,291 I understand you have some filmmaking experience. 136 00:04:52,293 --> 00:04:54,826 - Well, you know, I've been re-Vined by Rob Kardashian, 137 00:04:54,828 --> 00:04:56,762 so, yeah, I'm a director. 138 00:04:56,764 --> 00:04:57,929 Here's what I'm picturing: 139 00:04:57,931 --> 00:05:01,300 I enter, in, like, a Fellini-style getup. 140 00:05:01,302 --> 00:05:02,934 Rosa's dressed like a porcupine-- 141 00:05:02,936 --> 00:05:04,736 - Oh, no, no. We're just gonna do a simple, 142 00:05:04,738 --> 00:05:06,638 straightforward tour of the precinct 143 00:05:06,640 --> 00:05:08,040 featuring Detective Diaz and me. 144 00:05:08,042 --> 00:05:09,408 - Are you sure? 145 00:05:09,410 --> 00:05:12,678 You're not our most dynamic screen presences. 146 00:05:12,680 --> 00:05:13,812 - I can be dynamic. 147 00:05:13,814 --> 00:05:15,347 Exclamation point. 148 00:05:15,349 --> 00:05:17,549 - Well, Diaz and I have that kind of easy chemistry 149 00:05:17,551 --> 00:05:19,451 where we finish each other's-- - Sentences. 150 00:05:19,453 --> 00:05:21,486 - Please, don't interrupt me. 151 00:05:21,488 --> 00:05:24,523 That kind of nonsense won't happen on camera. 152 00:05:24,525 --> 00:05:25,991 - Hey, hey, Pimento. 153 00:05:25,993 --> 00:05:26,992 - Hey! 154 00:05:26,994 --> 00:05:28,827 This is my desk, okay? 155 00:05:28,829 --> 00:05:31,763 - Okay, well, now that that's out of the way, 156 00:05:31,765 --> 00:05:33,832 I was just coming to let you know we're gonna work 157 00:05:33,834 --> 00:05:36,001 a B&E together; we're gonna be partners. 158 00:05:36,003 --> 00:05:37,969 - Nope. I work alone. 159 00:05:37,971 --> 00:05:40,105 Plus, The Butcher says he has spies in the NYPD, 160 00:05:40,107 --> 00:05:42,474 so I trust none of these dildos. 161 00:05:42,476 --> 00:05:44,376 - Listen, you can trust me. 162 00:05:44,378 --> 00:05:46,445 I'm, like, obsessed with you. - [scoffs] Fine. 163 00:05:46,447 --> 00:05:49,114 Tell me something you've never told another living soul. 164 00:05:49,116 --> 00:05:50,549 - Um... 165 00:05:50,551 --> 00:05:51,917 Ooh, here's one. 166 00:05:51,919 --> 00:05:54,720 I'm actually not strong enough to lift a water cooler jug, 167 00:05:54,722 --> 00:05:56,121 so I always find a way to make Terry do it. 168 00:05:56,123 --> 00:05:57,622 - Here's mine. 169 00:05:57,624 --> 00:05:59,024 Jimmy "The Butcher" made me drive a croquet wicket 170 00:05:59,026 --> 00:06:02,094 through a guy's eyes into his brain. 171 00:06:02,096 --> 00:06:05,464 Brain leaked out his eyes like he was crying his own mind. 172 00:06:05,466 --> 00:06:06,965 - My goodness. 173 00:06:06,967 --> 00:06:08,500 Now that I've heard yours, 174 00:06:08,502 --> 00:06:10,369 I feel like my water cooler thing 175 00:06:10,371 --> 00:06:11,770 could have been a little more juicy, but... 176 00:06:11,772 --> 00:06:14,573 - No. That was embarrassing for you. 177 00:06:14,575 --> 00:06:15,874 A bond has been made. 178 00:06:17,644 --> 00:06:19,511 Feels good to trust again, brother. 179 00:06:19,513 --> 00:06:21,480 - Wow, either you are a cyborg 180 00:06:21,482 --> 00:06:24,449 or you're carrying so many weapons in this jacket. 181 00:06:24,451 --> 00:06:26,852 - Hey. Kitchen, now. 182 00:06:26,854 --> 00:06:27,919 - Okay. 183 00:06:27,921 --> 00:06:29,321 What's up? 184 00:06:29,322 --> 00:06:30,722 - Something's not right about that guy. 185 00:06:30,724 --> 00:06:32,624 - Why, just because he keeps threatening to kill me 186 00:06:32,626 --> 00:06:34,793 in the middle of a police precinct? Uh, grow up. 187 00:06:34,795 --> 00:06:36,128 - Because I'm physically attracted to him. 188 00:06:36,130 --> 00:06:37,829 - And that's bad? 189 00:06:37,831 --> 00:06:39,831 - I'm only attracted to creeps: the Vulture, the ShamWow guy, 190 00:06:39,833 --> 00:06:41,133 and when I was a kid, 191 00:06:41,135 --> 00:06:42,768 I had a major crush on the evil Gremlin. 192 00:06:42,770 --> 00:06:44,336 - Stripe? Are you crazy? 193 00:06:44,337 --> 00:06:45,903 - Yeah, well I'm not gonna bone Gizmo. 194 00:06:45,906 --> 00:06:48,006 - I would. - Careful with Pimento. 195 00:06:49,009 --> 00:06:50,575 - It's gonna be fine. 196 00:06:54,047 --> 00:06:55,147 - Hey, partner. 197 00:06:55,149 --> 00:06:57,182 - Oh! - I've been waiting for you. 198 00:06:57,184 --> 00:06:58,417 [chuckles] 199 00:07:01,422 --> 00:07:02,788 - Sorry if I surprised you. 200 00:07:02,790 --> 00:07:04,623 It's just when I was undercover, the middle of the night 201 00:07:04,625 --> 00:07:05,991 was the only time I could do actual police work. 202 00:07:05,993 --> 00:07:07,626 - Uh, how'd you get in the apartment? 203 00:07:07,628 --> 00:07:08,860 - Oh, it was easy. 204 00:07:08,862 --> 00:07:10,495 I just seduced the old lady upstairs, 205 00:07:10,497 --> 00:07:13,165 came down the fire escape, jimmied the window open. 206 00:07:13,167 --> 00:07:15,867 Bing-bang-boom, I'm inside your living quarters. 207 00:07:15,869 --> 00:07:17,469 - Totally. 208 00:07:17,471 --> 00:07:19,871 Course, next time you could just give me a call, you know. 209 00:07:19,873 --> 00:07:21,440 Two ways to pop in on a friend. 210 00:07:21,442 --> 00:07:22,574 - I didn't kill the old lady upstairs, 211 00:07:22,576 --> 00:07:23,742 if that's what you're worried about. 212 00:07:23,744 --> 00:07:25,010 - Well, I am now. 213 00:07:25,012 --> 00:07:26,478 - Oh, wait a minute. 214 00:07:26,480 --> 00:07:28,447 You think I'm being weird. 215 00:07:28,449 --> 00:07:30,582 Oh, I shouldn't have come here. This is your apartment. 216 00:07:30,584 --> 00:07:34,519 I'm so sorry, Jake! Stupid, Paul! 217 00:07:34,521 --> 00:07:36,121 Stupid! You idiot, Paul! 218 00:07:36,123 --> 00:07:37,789 - Hey! Pimento! - Huh?! 219 00:07:37,791 --> 00:07:40,058 - Who's Paul? - Whoa. 220 00:07:40,060 --> 00:07:41,827 Paul Sneed was my undercover name. 221 00:07:41,829 --> 00:07:43,228 'Kay? Damn it, Jake. 222 00:07:43,230 --> 00:07:44,763 I don't know who I am anymore. 223 00:07:44,765 --> 00:07:46,465 - You could have chose any name to go undercover, 224 00:07:46,467 --> 00:07:47,466 and you picked Paul Sneed? 225 00:07:47,468 --> 00:07:48,467 Seems kind of crazy. 226 00:07:48,469 --> 00:07:49,534 - I shouldn't have come here. 227 00:07:49,536 --> 00:07:50,902 This was a mistake. I'm not ready. 228 00:07:50,904 --> 00:07:53,505 I knew I wasn't ready to go back to being police. 229 00:07:53,507 --> 00:07:55,640 It's the only job I've ever had except for bagging groceries 230 00:07:55,642 --> 00:07:58,176 at the supermarket at the corner of Atlantic and Clinton. 231 00:07:58,178 --> 00:08:00,212 I guess I could go back to that again. 232 00:08:00,214 --> 00:08:01,746 "Paper or plastic?" 233 00:08:01,748 --> 00:08:03,081 Yeah, still got it. 234 00:08:03,083 --> 00:08:04,983 - Listen to me, I was undercover. 235 00:08:04,985 --> 00:08:08,687 63 days with the Mafia. I saw some messed-up stuff. 236 00:08:08,689 --> 00:08:10,689 I know what your struggle is. 237 00:08:10,691 --> 00:08:14,659 And I can bring you home, but you've got to trust me. 238 00:08:14,661 --> 00:08:17,028 - Okay. Yeah. 239 00:08:17,030 --> 00:08:19,764 - Great. Now, I've got to get some sleep. 240 00:08:19,766 --> 00:08:22,133 You're welcome to stay here and work the case if you want. 241 00:08:22,135 --> 00:08:23,168 - Thanks, partner. 242 00:08:23,170 --> 00:08:25,937 I promise I won't disturb you at all. 243 00:08:26,874 --> 00:08:30,041 Whuuuhhhh. 244 00:08:30,043 --> 00:08:33,044 Whuuuhhhh. 245 00:08:33,046 --> 00:08:34,746 - Hey, Pimento. - Huh? 246 00:08:34,748 --> 00:08:36,615 - I thought you were just gonna be looking through the files 247 00:08:36,617 --> 00:08:37,816 or something, man. - Sorry, brother. 248 00:08:37,818 --> 00:08:39,885 Tai chi helps keep the demons at bay. 249 00:08:39,887 --> 00:08:41,152 - Right. 250 00:08:41,154 --> 00:08:43,088 And... 251 00:08:43,090 --> 00:08:44,523 Do you have to do it in your underwear? 252 00:08:44,525 --> 00:08:46,642 - I can't take them off, 253 00:08:46,643 --> 00:08:48,760 'cause then you'd be looking right at my penis and testicles. 254 00:08:48,762 --> 00:08:51,663 - Can't argue with that logic. Mm-kay. 255 00:08:54,001 --> 00:08:56,301 - Why is there so much garbage in here? 256 00:08:56,303 --> 00:08:58,803 - [sighs] Mean Marge won't clean up the stew. 257 00:08:58,805 --> 00:09:01,206 And also, she suspended our trash service. 258 00:09:01,208 --> 00:09:02,641 - What happened? 259 00:09:02,643 --> 00:09:04,242 You didn't grovel enough, did you? 260 00:09:04,244 --> 00:09:06,978 - Seriously, Amy, you're gonna ask Charles Boyle 261 00:09:06,980 --> 00:09:09,114 if he groveled enough? Come on! 262 00:09:09,116 --> 00:09:10,815 - This is the grossest thing I've ever seen, 263 00:09:10,817 --> 00:09:12,584 and I have three kids under the age of four. 264 00:09:12,586 --> 00:09:14,052 I live in a house of fluids. 265 00:09:14,054 --> 00:09:15,854 - Look, I have a plan, okay? 266 00:09:15,856 --> 00:09:17,756 We're just gonna go over Mean Marge's head 267 00:09:17,758 --> 00:09:18,757 and we're gonna tell Holt. 268 00:09:18,759 --> 00:09:19,925 - Tell me what? 269 00:09:19,927 --> 00:09:21,293 - Oh, well, I don't know if you noticed, 270 00:09:21,295 --> 00:09:23,295 but there was an accident in the break room yesterday. 271 00:09:23,297 --> 00:09:26,898 - Oh, yes, shattered windows, bones everywhere. 272 00:09:26,900 --> 00:09:29,701 It's very "New York in the 70s." Clean it up. 273 00:09:29,703 --> 00:09:31,903 - The, uh, problem... 274 00:09:31,905 --> 00:09:35,206 is Marge in facilities is refusing to help. 275 00:09:35,208 --> 00:09:37,776 - We were actually hoping maybe you could ask her. 276 00:09:37,778 --> 00:09:39,228 - Excuse me? 277 00:09:39,229 --> 00:09:40,679 I'm the captain of this precinct. 278 00:09:40,681 --> 00:09:43,348 I don't have time to mediate your petty squabbles. 279 00:09:43,350 --> 00:09:46,585 I've taken a sacred oath to protect this community, 280 00:09:46,587 --> 00:09:49,087 and that is a job I take seriously. 281 00:09:49,089 --> 00:09:50,589 - So you're afraid of her, too, huh? 282 00:09:50,591 --> 00:09:51,690 - Terrified. 283 00:09:55,596 --> 00:09:57,796 - Yeah, perp knew where the camera was. 284 00:09:57,798 --> 00:09:59,164 Must have cased the joint ahead of time. 285 00:09:59,166 --> 00:10:01,032 We're gonna need all your footage from the past week. 286 00:10:01,034 --> 00:10:03,835 - Ha-ha-ha. This is an amateur job. 287 00:10:03,837 --> 00:10:05,637 Everybody knows you break in when the owner's there. 288 00:10:05,639 --> 00:10:07,272 That way you have guaranteed access to the safe, 289 00:10:07,274 --> 00:10:09,207 and you can kick his teeth in to send a message. 290 00:10:09,209 --> 00:10:10,909 - Okay, why don't you just... 291 00:10:10,911 --> 00:10:12,344 - Oh, sure, you could slit his throat, but then 292 00:10:12,346 --> 00:10:13,812 what are you going to do with all the blood? 293 00:10:13,814 --> 00:10:16,181 - Uh, we'd leave it in his body, where blood lives, 294 00:10:16,183 --> 00:10:18,000 because we're cops. 295 00:10:18,001 --> 00:10:19,818 - Oh, right, we're cops. And don't worry, sir. 296 00:10:19,820 --> 00:10:21,653 We're gonna catch these bastards, 297 00:10:21,655 --> 00:10:24,189 or my name isn't Paul Sneed. - Adrian Pimento. 298 00:10:24,191 --> 00:10:26,658 - Adrian Pimento. So, what'd they take? 299 00:10:26,660 --> 00:10:28,660 - About $15,000 worth of stuff. 300 00:10:28,662 --> 00:10:31,396 TVs, cameras, bunch of pre-paid cell phones. 301 00:10:31,398 --> 00:10:33,264 - Ooh, you sell burner phones? 302 00:10:33,266 --> 00:10:35,066 What kind of deals you got on those? 303 00:10:35,068 --> 00:10:36,852 - Why do you want to know about the deals? 304 00:10:36,853 --> 00:10:38,637 - Just gathering evidence for the case, 305 00:10:38,639 --> 00:10:40,071 'cause I'm a cop, remember? 306 00:10:40,073 --> 00:10:42,674 Detective Paul Sneed. - Adrian Pimento. 307 00:10:42,676 --> 00:10:46,711 - Adrian Piment--I--I know who I am--you know what--forget this! 308 00:10:46,713 --> 00:10:47,712 - Ah--okay. 309 00:10:47,714 --> 00:10:49,814 - [grunting] 310 00:10:49,816 --> 00:10:52,417 - Hey, hey, hey, come on, man. 311 00:10:52,419 --> 00:10:55,420 Look, I get it... you're still tense. 312 00:10:55,422 --> 00:10:57,188 When I came back from being undercover, 313 00:10:57,190 --> 00:10:58,790 they made me see a shrink. 314 00:10:58,792 --> 00:11:00,692 But then he told me I had dad issues, and I was like, 315 00:11:00,694 --> 00:11:02,060 "You know what, you can't tell me what to do, 316 00:11:02,062 --> 00:11:04,029 you're not my dad," so he was a moron. 317 00:11:04,031 --> 00:11:05,964 - No, you know what, that's good advice--thanks, man, thanks. 318 00:11:05,966 --> 00:11:08,066 I--I'll be right back, I just left something inside. 319 00:11:10,971 --> 00:11:12,804 Hey, give me one of those. 320 00:11:12,806 --> 00:11:16,141 - Why are you buying a burner phone? 321 00:11:16,143 --> 00:11:18,009 - Cue smoke machine. 322 00:11:18,011 --> 00:11:20,445 And...action Holt. 323 00:11:22,382 --> 00:11:25,216 - Welcome to the Nine-Nine. I'm Captain Raymond Holt. 324 00:11:25,218 --> 00:11:27,318 - And I'm Detective Rosa Diaz. 325 00:11:27,320 --> 00:11:29,320 I don't understand why I'm on a wheelchair. 326 00:11:29,322 --> 00:11:30,989 - Cut! 327 00:11:30,991 --> 00:11:34,325 For the last time, Rosa, through the magic of special effects, 328 00:11:34,327 --> 00:11:36,928 the wheelchair will turn into a horse, 329 00:11:36,930 --> 00:11:38,997 but I need you to work with me. 330 00:11:38,999 --> 00:11:41,099 Give me a little "hee-yah!" Hee-yah! 331 00:11:41,101 --> 00:11:42,768 - This is idiotic. 332 00:11:42,769 --> 00:11:44,436 - Maybe because you didn't karate chop your way 333 00:11:44,438 --> 00:11:46,738 through the smoke, as scripted. 334 00:11:46,740 --> 00:11:47,872 - I'm out. Scully. 335 00:11:47,874 --> 00:11:49,074 - Rosa! 336 00:11:49,076 --> 00:11:51,142 - Hee-yah, hee-yah. 337 00:11:51,144 --> 00:11:52,343 - I wanted a simple, straightforward 338 00:11:52,345 --> 00:11:54,362 video tour of the precinct, 339 00:11:54,363 --> 00:11:56,380 and you've added the one ingredient I didn't want: 340 00:11:56,383 --> 00:11:57,382 pizzazz. 341 00:11:57,384 --> 00:11:59,951 - Pizzazz is who I am. 342 00:11:59,953 --> 00:12:02,921 Would you tell the sky to stop being so blue? 343 00:12:02,923 --> 00:12:04,489 - Yes. I wish it were tan. - What? 344 00:12:04,491 --> 00:12:06,958 - It's my favorite color. It's no-nonsense. 345 00:12:06,960 --> 00:12:08,993 - Hey, I've been tailing Pimento, 346 00:12:08,995 --> 00:12:10,328 and I think you were right. 347 00:12:10,330 --> 00:12:12,063 There's something weird going on with that guy. 348 00:12:12,065 --> 00:12:13,498 - I knew it. Ugh! 349 00:12:13,500 --> 00:12:15,233 I can't believe I'm gonna sleep with him. 350 00:12:15,235 --> 00:12:17,469 - Well, you don't have to. 351 00:12:17,471 --> 00:12:18,903 - No, I'm gonna. 352 00:12:18,905 --> 00:12:20,939 - He secretly bought a burner phone, 353 00:12:20,941 --> 00:12:22,140 he broke into my apartment 354 00:12:22,142 --> 00:12:23,441 and he keeps forgetting he's a cop 355 00:12:23,443 --> 00:12:25,376 and calling himself by his alias, Paul Sneed. 356 00:12:25,378 --> 00:12:26,811 - Paul Sneed? 357 00:12:26,813 --> 00:12:28,513 - He said Figgis has spies in the NYPD. 358 00:12:28,515 --> 00:12:31,182 Rosa, what if he's one of them? What if he turned? 359 00:12:31,184 --> 00:12:33,118 Oh, here he comes. 360 00:12:33,120 --> 00:12:35,353 Oh, man, bolt cutters? 361 00:12:35,355 --> 00:12:36,788 Bolt cutters have literally 362 00:12:36,790 --> 00:12:38,223 never been used by an innocent person. 363 00:12:38,225 --> 00:12:39,758 - I use them all the time when I make jewelry. 364 00:12:39,760 --> 00:12:41,159 - What? Oh, my God. 365 00:12:41,161 --> 00:12:42,360 Follow-up questions later. 366 00:12:42,362 --> 00:12:43,528 All right, I got to keep following him. 367 00:12:43,530 --> 00:12:45,163 - All right, but be careful. 368 00:12:45,165 --> 00:12:47,899 - Oh, don't worry about me. I'll be invisible. 369 00:12:47,901 --> 00:12:49,934 Now you see me, now you-- [car engine revs] 370 00:12:49,936 --> 00:12:51,936 - โ™ช 'Cause here's my number โ™ช - Ah-- 371 00:12:51,938 --> 00:12:53,204 - โ™ช So call me maybe โ™ช 372 00:12:53,206 --> 00:12:55,473 [music stops] - We're cool, we're cool. 373 00:12:55,475 --> 00:12:57,442 Everything's still cool. He didn't hear me, we're cool. 374 00:13:04,217 --> 00:13:05,283 [phone pad beeps] 375 00:13:06,253 --> 00:13:07,285 - Rosa. 376 00:13:07,287 --> 00:13:08,520 Pimento just put on a ski mask 377 00:13:08,522 --> 00:13:10,488 and broke into a creepy abandoned warehouse. 378 00:13:10,490 --> 00:13:11,489 - Mm, that's hot. 379 00:13:11,491 --> 00:13:12,991 - It is? 380 00:13:12,993 --> 00:13:14,159 Oh, wait, he's coming back out. 381 00:13:14,161 --> 00:13:15,827 - Did he do something super shady? 382 00:13:15,829 --> 00:13:16,928 Are his eyes all wild? 383 00:13:16,930 --> 00:13:18,496 - Rosa, focus. - Sorry. 384 00:13:18,498 --> 00:13:20,165 Send a pic. Bye. 385 00:13:20,167 --> 00:13:22,033 - Okay, guess we're done talking. 386 00:13:24,871 --> 00:13:27,272 - Well, they still haven't cleaned up in there, 387 00:13:27,274 --> 00:13:29,941 but the good news is I got a new plan. 388 00:13:29,943 --> 00:13:32,443 I let one of the perps accidentally get out of holding, 389 00:13:32,445 --> 00:13:34,879 then I take him down to the break room. 390 00:13:34,881 --> 00:13:37,148 Oopsie. Now it's a whole crime scene. 391 00:13:37,150 --> 00:13:39,284 - [gasps] And then we can get crime scene cleaners. 392 00:13:39,286 --> 00:13:41,319 - Boom. - Not so fast. 393 00:13:41,321 --> 00:13:43,588 That room gets clean when I say it gets cleaned. 394 00:13:43,590 --> 00:13:45,423 - You can't stop us now. 395 00:13:45,425 --> 00:13:47,292 - You ever heard the old saying, 396 00:13:47,294 --> 00:13:49,928 "Know the garbage, know the man?" 397 00:13:49,930 --> 00:13:50,995 - That's not a saying. 398 00:13:50,997 --> 00:13:54,232 - Yes, it is. I know all your secrets. 399 00:13:54,234 --> 00:13:55,834 [snaps fingers] Boyle. 400 00:13:55,836 --> 00:13:57,402 You got a taste for fast food. 401 00:13:57,404 --> 00:13:59,170 - [giggles] Those aren't mine. 402 00:13:59,172 --> 00:14:00,905 I only eat locally-sourced meats. 403 00:14:00,907 --> 00:14:02,307 They could be Terry's. He was fat once, you know? 404 00:14:02,309 --> 00:14:03,875 - What the hell, Boyle? 405 00:14:03,877 --> 00:14:05,043 - Speaking of Jeffords, 406 00:14:05,045 --> 00:14:06,578 maybe your daughters would like to know 407 00:14:06,580 --> 00:14:09,380 that their daddy throws away all their drawings? 408 00:14:09,382 --> 00:14:11,883 - They just draw so many, and they're all so bad. 409 00:14:11,885 --> 00:14:13,885 - And you, Santiago, 410 00:14:13,887 --> 00:14:16,020 maybe the world would like to see that draft of a memo 411 00:14:16,022 --> 00:14:19,991 you wrote where you used T-H-E-I-R instead of T-H-E-R-E? 412 00:14:19,993 --> 00:14:21,893 - Oh, you sick son of a bitch. 413 00:14:21,895 --> 00:14:23,161 - Why do you hate us so much? 414 00:14:23,163 --> 00:14:25,230 - I know you call me Mean Marge. 415 00:14:25,232 --> 00:14:27,065 Do you even know my last name? 416 00:14:27,067 --> 00:14:28,399 Hmm? 417 00:14:28,401 --> 00:14:31,302 - Mop-Bucket? - Scully, don't guess. 418 00:14:31,304 --> 00:14:32,437 Please. - No. 419 00:14:32,439 --> 00:14:34,005 - Guys, guys, guys, guys, guys. 420 00:14:35,175 --> 00:14:37,075 - "Mop-Bucket," Scully? 421 00:14:37,077 --> 00:14:38,509 - It was a educated guess. 422 00:14:40,413 --> 00:14:42,113 - Thanks for coming. 423 00:14:42,115 --> 00:14:44,215 Pimento put the duffel in his trunk, parked around the corner, 424 00:14:44,217 --> 00:14:45,984 and went home; he's been doing shirtless tai chi 425 00:14:45,986 --> 00:14:46,985 in his window ever since. 426 00:14:46,987 --> 00:14:48,319 - Which window is that? 427 00:14:51,057 --> 00:14:53,391 Mm-hmm. - Okay. 428 00:14:53,393 --> 00:14:54,826 Look, I got to get into that trunk. 429 00:14:54,827 --> 00:14:56,260 - And you need me to break into the car for you? 430 00:14:56,263 --> 00:14:57,262 - What? No, I can do it. 431 00:14:57,264 --> 00:14:58,930 Why would you say that? 432 00:14:58,932 --> 00:15:01,099 - Because one time you lost your keys and you called a tow truck. 433 00:15:01,101 --> 00:15:03,034 - My mom pays for roadside assistance. 434 00:15:03,036 --> 00:15:06,304 Why wouldn't I call it? I'm doing this. 435 00:15:09,342 --> 00:15:12,911 - Okay, great take! You guys are finally getting it. 436 00:15:12,913 --> 00:15:16,347 All right, let's go again. Action Holt! 437 00:15:16,349 --> 00:15:18,917 - [rhythmic blowing] 438 00:15:18,919 --> 00:15:22,320 Welcome to the Nine-Nine. I'm Captain Raymond Holt. 439 00:15:22,322 --> 00:15:25,423 - And I'm Detective Rosa Diaz. Hee-yah. 440 00:15:25,425 --> 00:15:27,025 - The hell is this? 441 00:15:27,027 --> 00:15:30,061 - You had a pizzazz problem, so you've been recast, sweetie. 442 00:15:30,063 --> 00:15:31,396 Welcome to Hollywood. 443 00:15:31,398 --> 00:15:34,232 You know, David here really connected with the role. 444 00:15:34,234 --> 00:15:36,701 - The key is to invent a backstory for your character. 445 00:15:36,703 --> 00:15:40,505 Now, my Raymond Holt is addicted to pills, but no one knows. 446 00:15:40,507 --> 00:15:44,275 - You see, he really understands the craft, 447 00:15:44,277 --> 00:15:47,412 whereas you and Rosa just sort of flop around 448 00:15:47,414 --> 00:15:49,414 like a couple of boring normals. 449 00:15:49,416 --> 00:15:51,115 - I'm sorry, but we're detectives, 450 00:15:51,117 --> 00:15:52,951 not professional actors. 451 00:15:52,953 --> 00:15:54,185 We were trying our hardest. 452 00:15:54,187 --> 00:15:56,321 - "We were trying our hardest." - Stop it. 453 00:15:56,323 --> 00:15:59,724 - Gina, this is a disgrace. I'm removing you as director. 454 00:16:00,961 --> 00:16:02,260 - There he goes. 455 00:16:02,262 --> 00:16:04,062 [whispering] Off to take more pills. 456 00:16:05,031 --> 00:16:06,331 - Oh, yeah. 457 00:16:06,333 --> 00:16:08,633 Suck it, roadside assistance. 458 00:16:08,635 --> 00:16:10,134 - Well, well, well. 459 00:16:10,136 --> 00:16:11,469 Hello, Jake. 460 00:16:11,471 --> 00:16:14,005 - Adrian, what a coincidence bumping into you here. 461 00:16:14,007 --> 00:16:15,006 Well, see you tomorrow. 462 00:16:15,008 --> 00:16:16,207 [gun cocks] 463 00:16:16,209 --> 00:16:17,308 You know what, let's hang out now. 464 00:16:17,310 --> 00:16:18,443 I was thinking the exact same thing. 465 00:16:18,445 --> 00:16:20,111 [laughs] 466 00:16:20,113 --> 00:16:21,245 - What are you doing here, partner? 467 00:16:21,247 --> 00:16:22,246 - Pimento's still in the window. 468 00:16:22,248 --> 00:16:23,581 - Come on, Jake. 469 00:16:23,583 --> 00:16:25,750 You honestly didn't assume I would hire a look-alike 470 00:16:25,752 --> 00:16:28,219 to wear a fake beard and do tai chi in my window? 471 00:16:28,221 --> 00:16:30,054 - No, I definitely didn't assume that. 472 00:16:30,056 --> 00:16:31,656 - And plus, you seriously thought that was me? 473 00:16:31,658 --> 00:16:33,324 I mean, you've seen me in my underpants. 474 00:16:33,326 --> 00:16:35,193 My butt is rock hard. 475 00:16:35,195 --> 00:16:36,594 That guy's got a pancake butt. 476 00:16:36,596 --> 00:16:38,363 - I can't believe you're still working for Figgis. 477 00:16:38,365 --> 00:16:39,731 That's why you've been acting so weird. 478 00:16:39,733 --> 00:16:41,499 Breaking into my apartment, buying a burner phone, 479 00:16:41,501 --> 00:16:43,201 grabbing this duffel. 480 00:16:43,203 --> 00:16:44,736 - I broke into your apartment 'cause I didn't feel safe 481 00:16:44,738 --> 00:16:46,304 at my home. - Okay. 482 00:16:46,306 --> 00:16:48,072 - And a burner phone is the only kind of phone I can get 483 00:16:48,074 --> 00:16:49,574 because I disappeared for 12 years, 484 00:16:49,576 --> 00:16:51,642 and now have terrible credit. - Makes sense. 485 00:16:51,644 --> 00:16:53,544 - You want to know what's in the duffel? 486 00:16:53,546 --> 00:16:55,313 Open it up, tough guy. 487 00:16:55,315 --> 00:16:57,148 - [sighs] 488 00:16:57,150 --> 00:16:59,150 - Oh, look at that. 489 00:16:59,152 --> 00:17:02,487 A bunch of old family photos and personal belongings. 490 00:17:02,489 --> 00:17:04,055 - Pimento's mementos. 491 00:17:04,057 --> 00:17:05,623 I know you have a gun on me. 492 00:17:05,624 --> 00:17:07,190 I just couldn't resist the rhyme, sorry. 493 00:17:07,193 --> 00:17:09,160 - I stashed it all when I became Paul Sneed. 494 00:17:09,162 --> 00:17:10,695 I couldn't have them finding anything 495 00:17:10,697 --> 00:17:12,063 that could trace back to my family. 496 00:17:12,065 --> 00:17:13,364 - I get it, all right? 497 00:17:13,366 --> 00:17:15,166 I went through the exact same thing when I came back-- 498 00:17:15,168 --> 00:17:18,102 - You have no clue what I've been through! 499 00:17:18,104 --> 00:17:20,338 You know what? 500 00:17:20,340 --> 00:17:22,206 I can't believe I trusted you. 501 00:17:23,476 --> 00:17:24,742 - Okay. 502 00:17:24,744 --> 00:17:27,145 - Just get out of here, Jake. 503 00:17:27,147 --> 00:17:29,147 - Oh, my God, this guy's got a pancake butt. 504 00:17:29,149 --> 00:17:31,349 It's not Pimento. Get out of there, Jake! 505 00:17:31,351 --> 00:17:32,683 - Thanks, Rosa. 506 00:17:35,355 --> 00:17:37,155 - So Detective Pimento didn't show up for work today. 507 00:17:37,157 --> 00:17:38,289 Any idea why? 508 00:17:38,291 --> 00:17:39,757 - Oh, yeah, I straight up drove him off. 509 00:17:39,759 --> 00:17:41,626 Big screw-up on my part. 510 00:17:41,628 --> 00:17:43,561 I'm trying this new thing where I just own my mistakes. 511 00:17:43,563 --> 00:17:45,229 I like it. Do you? - I did. 512 00:17:45,231 --> 00:17:47,065 Until you bragged about it. - Yeah. 513 00:17:47,067 --> 00:17:48,332 - Pimento left his gun and badge on my desk, 514 00:17:48,334 --> 00:17:50,701 along with a note reading, "I can't do this. 515 00:17:50,703 --> 00:17:52,537 I'm better off as a bagman." 516 00:17:52,539 --> 00:17:53,771 - Oh, no. 517 00:17:53,773 --> 00:17:55,440 - You think he went back to work with Figgis? 518 00:17:55,442 --> 00:17:56,441 - Worse. 519 00:17:56,443 --> 00:17:58,209 - Fine, single bag it. 520 00:17:58,211 --> 00:18:00,344 It's your funeral, you dumb son of a bitch. 521 00:18:00,346 --> 00:18:02,613 Get out of here. 522 00:18:02,615 --> 00:18:03,648 Idiot. 523 00:18:04,784 --> 00:18:05,850 - Hey, partner. 524 00:18:05,852 --> 00:18:07,385 - Bag boys don't have partners. 525 00:18:07,387 --> 00:18:08,586 - Actually, cashiers and bag boys 526 00:18:08,588 --> 00:18:10,088 need to be totally in sync-- 527 00:18:10,090 --> 00:18:11,522 - Shut up, Maggie. 528 00:18:11,524 --> 00:18:13,724 - Look, man, you sacrificed 12 years of your life 529 00:18:13,726 --> 00:18:15,860 for the police department; you're a hero. 530 00:18:15,862 --> 00:18:17,862 I'm sorry that I didn't trust you. 531 00:18:17,864 --> 00:18:20,198 - Yeah. Me too. 532 00:18:20,200 --> 00:18:23,734 - Look, can I tell you something I've never told anyone before? 533 00:18:23,736 --> 00:18:28,239 My time undercover in the Mafia was actually kind of lame. 534 00:18:28,241 --> 00:18:30,374 I mean, I wanted it to be badass, 535 00:18:30,376 --> 00:18:32,310 but I'm good at computers, so I mostly just helped them 536 00:18:32,312 --> 00:18:33,578 switch over from AOL. 537 00:18:33,580 --> 00:18:36,681 I have no idea what you're going through. 538 00:18:36,683 --> 00:18:39,584 And I want to tell you that it's all gonna go back to normal, 539 00:18:39,586 --> 00:18:41,552 but honestly, I have no clue. 540 00:18:44,124 --> 00:18:46,224 Anyways, the footage came back on that B&E, 541 00:18:46,226 --> 00:18:47,658 and we've got a suspect. 542 00:18:47,660 --> 00:18:50,161 I'm going to bust him right now if you want to come with me. 543 00:18:52,432 --> 00:18:53,698 - Why don't you give me those eggs? 544 00:18:53,700 --> 00:18:54,899 I'll put them on top here. 545 00:18:56,236 --> 00:18:57,869 - Okay. 546 00:18:57,871 --> 00:18:59,704 - What was that about? What happened to you? 547 00:18:59,706 --> 00:19:01,205 - Maggie, butt out! 548 00:19:01,207 --> 00:19:03,207 Okay? This is my life! 549 00:19:03,209 --> 00:19:04,509 - So I just received word 550 00:19:04,511 --> 00:19:06,344 from our friend at the Guffin Foundation. 551 00:19:06,346 --> 00:19:08,646 Apparently they loved our video submission. 552 00:19:08,648 --> 00:19:10,214 What did you send them? 553 00:19:10,216 --> 00:19:12,350 - A cinematic masterpiece is what I sent them. 554 00:19:12,352 --> 00:19:13,718 - Did it feature pizzazz? 555 00:19:13,720 --> 00:19:15,620 - No, none at all, sir. 556 00:19:15,622 --> 00:19:18,156 First, I couldn't wrap my head around that concept, 557 00:19:18,158 --> 00:19:19,590 but then I realized: 558 00:19:19,592 --> 00:19:21,893 do you know which dogs get the most likes on the internet? 559 00:19:21,895 --> 00:19:23,528 - Anatolian Shepherds. 560 00:19:23,530 --> 00:19:25,897 - No, ugly little runts 561 00:19:25,899 --> 00:19:29,901 with wonky eyes and tongues that won't stay in their mouths. 562 00:19:29,903 --> 00:19:31,369 - But the Anatolian Shepherd 563 00:19:31,371 --> 00:19:32,770 is unrivaled for protecting livestock. 564 00:19:32,772 --> 00:19:34,539 - I was trying to wow them, 565 00:19:34,541 --> 00:19:38,476 and I should have just been showcasing our wonk-eye. 566 00:19:38,478 --> 00:19:39,877 - โ™ช I will remember you โ™ช 567 00:19:39,879 --> 00:19:43,181 - We were trying our hardest, but this is a disgrace. 568 00:19:43,183 --> 00:19:45,316 [echoing] Disgrace, disgrace. 569 00:19:45,318 --> 00:19:47,285 Help us. Stop it. 570 00:19:48,621 --> 00:19:52,523 - And that's real audio of your very-real diva meltdown. 571 00:19:52,525 --> 00:19:55,593 You might just make it as an actor after all. 572 00:19:55,595 --> 00:19:56,827 - Well done, Linetti. 573 00:19:56,829 --> 00:19:57,929 - Sergeant Linetti. 574 00:19:57,931 --> 00:20:00,298 I had the fake Holt give me a promotion. 575 00:20:00,300 --> 00:20:02,266 He signed the papers and everything. 576 00:20:03,736 --> 00:20:04,969 - What do you want? 577 00:20:04,971 --> 00:20:07,638 - To tell you that we will officially be renaming 578 00:20:07,640 --> 00:20:13,311 the fourth-floor break room "The Marge Bronigan Break Room." 579 00:20:13,313 --> 00:20:14,579 - Well. 580 00:20:14,581 --> 00:20:15,913 Looks like somebody did their homework. 581 00:20:15,915 --> 00:20:17,548 - It was me. I did it. 582 00:20:17,550 --> 00:20:19,083 - So what's the catch? 583 00:20:19,084 --> 00:20:20,617 - The ceremony starts in two hours. 584 00:20:20,620 --> 00:20:23,487 Now, I know our squad is not in the janitor's union, 585 00:20:23,489 --> 00:20:25,223 but it'd sure be nice if we were allowed 586 00:20:25,225 --> 00:20:27,525 to clean the place up before then. 587 00:20:28,995 --> 00:20:30,695 We cleaned up the stew, 588 00:20:30,697 --> 00:20:36,300 which means the Marge Bronigan Break Room is open for business! 589 00:20:36,302 --> 00:20:39,370 - Okay, we'll take out your trash, do normal cleaning, 590 00:20:39,372 --> 00:20:40,638 but no big messes. 591 00:20:40,640 --> 00:20:42,640 - Great! Time for the christening. 592 00:20:42,642 --> 00:20:43,874 [pop] [glass shatters] 593 00:20:43,876 --> 00:20:46,244 [overlapping chatter, commotion] 594 00:20:46,246 --> 00:20:47,979 - Oh, crap. 595 00:20:47,981 --> 00:20:49,313 [all gasp, shout] 596 00:20:51,851 --> 00:20:53,751 Congratulations. 597 00:20:53,753 --> 00:20:56,887 - Perp is on the third floor. Everyone know your assignment? 598 00:20:56,889 --> 00:20:58,356 - Mind if I tag along? 599 00:20:58,358 --> 00:20:59,624 - Pimento? 600 00:20:59,626 --> 00:21:00,758 - I thought about it. 601 00:21:00,760 --> 00:21:02,493 If you say things will get back to normal, 602 00:21:02,495 --> 00:21:04,895 then I trust you. 603 00:21:04,897 --> 00:21:06,430 - All right. 604 00:21:06,432 --> 00:21:07,431 Let's do this. 605 00:21:07,433 --> 00:21:09,967 You're with me, partner. 606 00:21:09,969 --> 00:21:12,370 [guns cock] NYPD! You're under arrest! 607 00:21:12,372 --> 00:21:13,971 - You're gonna die! 608 00:21:13,973 --> 00:21:15,773 - No, Pimento! No! 609 00:21:15,775 --> 00:21:17,775 - Not a doctor. Shh. 610 00:21:17,777 --> 00:21:19,310 - Fremulon. 610 00:21:20,305 --> 00:22:20,679 Please rate this subtitle at www.osdb.link/nv77 Help other users to choose the best subtitles 51249

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.