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1
00:00:15,798 --> 00:00:17,930
I talked to Jenny McAullife
today.
2
00:00:17,974 --> 00:00:19,236
Lord, why?
3
00:00:19,280 --> 00:00:20,281
She cornered me.
4
00:00:21,282 --> 00:00:23,110
What did you guys talk about?
5
00:00:23,153 --> 00:00:24,633
I don't even remember.
6
00:00:24,676 --> 00:00:27,331
She was going on and on about
something really boring,
7
00:00:27,375 --> 00:00:31,988
like a family car trip, and
she was just so excited.
8
00:00:32,032 --> 00:00:33,598
It was so weird.
9
00:00:33,642 --> 00:00:35,513
It's not like she was
talking about a new boyfriend
10
00:00:35,557 --> 00:00:38,429
or seeing her favorite band.
11
00:00:38,473 --> 00:00:40,388
She was just psyched.
12
00:00:40,431 --> 00:00:43,347
Like high on life.
13
00:00:44,479 --> 00:00:49,049
Yeah, war, child abuse, poverty,disease,
14
00:00:49,092 --> 00:00:51,355
life gets me wasted.
15
00:00:51,399 --> 00:00:52,965
And I was thinking,
16
00:00:53,009 --> 00:00:55,577
I've never been that excitedabout anything and I'm like 17.
17
00:00:55,620 --> 00:00:58,928
It's only gonna get lamer
and more boring from here.
18
00:00:58,971 --> 00:01:00,886
People who are that happy are
insane.
19
00:01:04,020 --> 00:01:05,239
We're doomed.
20
00:02:15,918 --> 00:02:19,139
Well peeps, it's Friday
and you are all set
21
00:02:19,182 --> 00:02:20,444
for another weekend.
22
00:02:23,143 --> 00:02:25,275
Yeah, that's slammin'.
23
00:02:25,319 --> 00:02:27,321
And while most of you
will do the right thing
24
00:02:27,364 --> 00:02:30,715
like doing homework and going tochurch,
25
00:02:30,759 --> 00:02:32,587
some of you will be putting yourfutures
26
00:02:32,630 --> 00:02:34,284
and your very lives at stake.
27
00:02:35,503 --> 00:02:39,768
Yes, homeboys and girls,
I'm talking about partying.
28
00:02:43,467 --> 00:02:46,470
Check your head, and
don't believe the hype.
29
00:02:46,514 --> 00:02:50,518
It's no difference if it's
brewskies or the kind herb,
30
00:02:50,561 --> 00:02:54,826
coke, crank, smack, LSD, PCP,
31
00:02:54,870 --> 00:02:58,961
model airplane glue,
vaginal, oral, or anal.
32
00:03:01,137 --> 00:03:03,792
It all leads to the same place.
33
00:03:03,835 --> 00:03:08,753
Jail, the hospital or the
graveyard.
34
00:03:08,797 --> 00:03:09,798
For reals.
35
00:03:12,888 --> 00:03:14,368
Holla if ya hear me.
36
00:03:15,804 --> 00:03:17,849
Has Mrs. Feen ever even had sex?
37
00:03:21,549 --> 00:03:24,726
So let's all give it up and turnit loose
38
00:03:24,769 --> 00:03:28,251
and watch these three
short educational films,
39
00:03:28,295 --> 00:03:29,644
You Booze, You Lose,
40
00:03:29,687 --> 00:03:31,646
The BloodStained Cell Phone,
41
00:03:31,689 --> 00:03:34,126
and Conchita Has Genital Warts.
42
00:03:41,525 --> 00:03:42,700
Hall lockers,
43
00:03:42,744 --> 00:03:44,746
true windows to the soul.
Ugly dykes.
44
00:03:46,574 --> 00:03:49,272
These are the innocent,
carefree good times
45
00:03:49,316 --> 00:03:51,143
we'll remember the rest of our
lives.
46
00:04:00,805 --> 00:04:03,025
Pain is weakness leaving the
body?
47
00:04:04,244 --> 00:04:07,247
So what, if you get run overby a car it makes you stronger?
48
00:04:07,290 --> 00:04:08,596
Or what about getting bone
cancer?
49
00:04:08,639 --> 00:04:09,597
I hear that's painful.
50
00:04:09,640 --> 00:04:10,946
You'd be hella strong then.
51
00:04:10,989 --> 00:04:11,816
He's cute.
52
00:04:13,905 --> 00:04:15,385
You're worse than my mother.
53
00:04:15,429 --> 00:04:16,734
He'd do it with you and then
laugh
54
00:04:16,778 --> 00:04:18,910
and send all his friends
pictures.
55
00:04:18,954 --> 00:04:19,694
Can't I even look?
56
00:04:19,737 --> 00:04:20,869
They can't be all bad.
57
00:04:23,393 --> 00:04:25,569
Y'know, we should be lesbians.
58
00:04:25,613 --> 00:04:27,049
I can't do the wardrobe.
59
00:04:28,268 --> 00:04:29,486
Also that partner word.
60
00:04:29,530 --> 00:04:31,619
Yuck, Partner sounds like you
work
61
00:04:31,662 --> 00:04:33,969
at a law firm or co-own a muffinshop.
62
00:04:34,012 --> 00:04:36,624
Muffin shop.
63
00:04:36,667 --> 00:04:39,627
Yo, what did one lesbian vampire
64
00:04:39,670 --> 00:04:41,193
say to the other lesbian
vampire?
65
00:04:41,237 --> 00:04:42,586
We don't care.
66
00:04:42,630 --> 00:04:44,240
See you next month .
67
00:04:46,286 --> 00:04:47,548
Well, that's my cue.
68
00:04:47,591 --> 00:04:49,027
Talk to you later.
See ya.
69
00:04:52,944 --> 00:04:54,294
Yo.
70
00:04:55,207 --> 00:04:56,644
You know what your problem is?
71
00:04:57,732 --> 00:04:59,690
Did I consent to this
conversation?
72
00:04:59,734 --> 00:05:01,170
You think you smarter than
everybody.
73
00:05:01,213 --> 00:05:02,519
'Cause you all serious all the
time
74
00:05:02,563 --> 00:05:03,694
and 'cause I always clowning andwhatevs,
75
00:05:03,738 --> 00:05:06,218
you think I'm not thoughtful andshit.
76
00:05:06,262 --> 00:05:07,176
Well, yes.
77
00:05:07,219 --> 00:05:08,960
But my shit is deep, though.
78
00:05:09,874 --> 00:05:11,615
And how deep would that shit be?
79
00:05:11,659 --> 00:05:13,182
Yo, check this.
80
00:05:13,225 --> 00:05:16,620
So I used to wonder so fewblack people are serial killers.
81
00:05:16,664 --> 00:05:18,274
But then I figured it out.
82
00:05:18,318 --> 00:05:19,971
The whole thing about
being a serial killer
83
00:05:20,015 --> 00:05:22,409
is that cops leave 'em alone
so you do it again and again.
84
00:05:22,452 --> 00:05:24,715
Jeffrey Dahmer's got some
rotten dead guy in his freezer
85
00:05:24,759 --> 00:05:26,891
cops come over, well Mr. Dahmer,
86
00:05:26,935 --> 00:05:28,371
we've had some complaints abouta smell,
87
00:05:28,415 --> 00:05:30,330
but looks like everything's finehere.
88
00:05:30,373 --> 00:05:31,722
Why don't you get back to skullfucking
89
00:05:31,766 --> 00:05:34,246
that corpse you just
warmed up in the microwave.
90
00:05:34,290 --> 00:05:35,552
Brother can't do that.
91
00:05:35,596 --> 00:05:36,684
Black man walkin' down the
street,
92
00:05:36,727 --> 00:05:37,859
the cops go hey hey what's yourname?
93
00:05:37,902 --> 00:05:39,121
Show me some ID, get in the car,
94
00:05:39,164 --> 00:05:40,470
we're gonna beat your ass
95
00:05:40,514 --> 00:05:42,124
until you confess to
something you ain't done.
96
00:05:42,167 --> 00:05:43,604
There ain't no time to pick up
20 girls
97
00:05:43,647 --> 00:05:45,432
on the street and make
hooker soup out of 'em.
98
00:05:45,475 --> 00:05:48,478
Police be on a brother's
ass every other week.
99
00:05:49,871 --> 00:05:52,656
Stevie, do you actually
know any black people?
100
00:05:55,006 --> 00:05:55,833
No.
101
00:05:55,877 --> 00:05:56,878
But you know why?
102
00:05:56,921 --> 00:05:59,663
'Cause it's a racist conspiracy.
103
00:05:59,707 --> 00:06:01,883
Oh hang on, you got
something on your face.
104
00:06:06,975 --> 00:06:08,411
Okay, that was cute,
but I'm going this way,
105
00:06:08,455 --> 00:06:09,934
and you're going that way.
106
00:06:09,978 --> 00:06:12,241
No worries, no bigness.
107
00:06:12,284 --> 00:06:14,461
Tell your Mama she was on her
game the day she made you.
108
00:06:14,504 --> 00:06:16,419
You a fine little meow meow.
109
00:06:16,463 --> 00:06:17,289
Meow meow.
110
00:06:20,467 --> 00:06:22,294
French philosopher Octave
Mirbeau
111
00:06:22,338 --> 00:06:25,472
once wrote the universe
appears to me like an immense,
112
00:06:25,515 --> 00:06:27,299
inexorable torture garden.
113
00:06:27,343 --> 00:06:29,432
Do you agree or disagree and
why?
114
00:06:31,303 --> 00:06:34,481
I feel this is a trick question.
115
00:06:35,482 --> 00:06:39,399
Life is torture for everyonewho's not stupid or super rich.
116
00:06:40,748 --> 00:06:43,403
But that answer will make
you think that I am someone
117
00:06:43,446 --> 00:06:45,883
who will spend their whole timeat school
118
00:06:47,058 --> 00:06:48,451
starting campus protests.
119
00:06:48,495 --> 00:06:49,583
So,
120
00:06:51,367 --> 00:06:53,500
no, I disagree.
121
00:06:54,718 --> 00:06:57,939
The universe is a beautiful
place full of laughing babies
122
00:06:57,982 --> 00:07:00,115
and puppies that fart rainbows.
123
00:07:01,595 --> 00:07:02,770
Describe the world
124
00:07:02,813 --> 00:07:06,077
within 100 feet of you right
now.
125
00:07:06,121 --> 00:07:07,383
Okay.
126
00:07:07,427 --> 00:07:11,996
Well, there's my dad,
who is probably peeing.
127
00:07:12,475 --> 00:07:14,564
My dad seems to be
peeing a lot these days.
128
00:07:15,870 --> 00:07:19,047
Perhaps he is pregnant.
129
00:07:19,090 --> 00:07:22,137
My teddy bear Lionel.
130
00:07:22,180 --> 00:07:24,661
The vibrator I ordered online
131
00:07:24,705 --> 00:07:26,489
using my elderly neighbor's name
132
00:07:26,533 --> 00:07:28,796
so if my dad opened the
box I could just say
133
00:07:28,839 --> 00:07:30,537
the mailman made a mistake.
134
00:07:30,580 --> 00:07:35,585
My custom magic 8 ball that
only gives me answers I like.
135
00:07:39,589 --> 00:07:44,072
And a sweaty fat chick
136
00:07:44,115 --> 00:07:48,076
sitting at a computer who reallyhopes she gets into college
137
00:07:48,119 --> 00:07:50,121
so she can escape this buttholeof a town
138
00:07:50,165 --> 00:07:51,601
before it eats her alive.
139
00:07:52,689 --> 00:07:55,387
Please attach a photo of
yourself.
140
00:08:37,168 --> 00:08:39,301
Aren't I old enough for grown-upfood?
141
00:08:39,344 --> 00:08:41,303
I don't have time to make two
meals.
142
00:08:44,480 --> 00:08:45,307
You,
143
00:08:46,613 --> 00:08:48,615
you need chew food.
144
00:08:48,658 --> 00:08:49,833
I am.
145
00:08:49,877 --> 00:08:52,488
No, you need chew more.
146
00:08:52,532 --> 00:08:54,882
40 times every bite.
147
00:08:54,925 --> 00:08:56,710
Digest properly.
148
00:08:56,753 --> 00:09:01,062
Food expand in stomach, get
stuck in intestine for weeks.
149
00:09:02,498 --> 00:09:03,847
Even months.
150
00:09:03,891 --> 00:09:05,762
If that were true, wouldn't
people just explode?
151
00:09:05,806 --> 00:09:07,068
Don't be sassy.
152
00:09:08,809 --> 00:09:09,636
40 times.
153
00:09:11,202 --> 00:09:14,249
One, two, three,
154
00:09:15,163 --> 00:09:16,077
four, five.
155
00:09:16,947 --> 00:09:17,731
See?
156
00:09:17,774 --> 00:09:20,385
Six, seven, eight.
157
00:09:22,083 --> 00:09:23,998
Nine, 10, 11.
No chew?
158
00:09:30,918 --> 00:09:32,136
Do you have any mints?
159
00:09:32,180 --> 00:09:34,399
My mom will shit if she smells
this on me.
160
00:09:34,443 --> 00:09:35,270
Nolo problemo.
161
00:09:42,625 --> 00:09:45,367
I bow downeth before thee, nobleknave.
162
00:09:47,717 --> 00:09:49,110
Oh, show's starting.
163
00:09:51,112 --> 00:09:51,982
Isn't it cool when you see
164
00:09:52,026 --> 00:09:54,855
two ugly people totally in love?
165
00:09:54,898 --> 00:09:56,944
How do you know they're in love?
166
00:09:56,987 --> 00:09:58,293
They're probably both married
167
00:09:58,336 --> 00:10:00,774
and met on
fatsoswannahaveanaffair.com.
168
00:10:00,817 --> 00:10:03,124
Come on, he adores her.
169
00:10:03,167 --> 00:10:04,908
Cooking her dinner.
170
00:10:04,952 --> 00:10:07,650
Yeah, so he can hit that
droopy behind after.
171
00:10:09,130 --> 00:10:10,566
You mean right now.
172
00:10:12,524 --> 00:10:14,788
I feel bad we're watching.
173
00:10:14,831 --> 00:10:16,311
Not too bad, obviously.
174
00:10:19,706 --> 00:10:22,099
It's biological 'cause
he puts out chemicals
175
00:10:22,143 --> 00:10:23,535
in the air that go into her
brain
176
00:10:23,579 --> 00:10:26,364
and they make her feel all loveydovey.
177
00:10:26,408 --> 00:10:28,453
I saw a TV show about it.
178
00:10:28,497 --> 00:10:31,195
So that's why people fall in
love?
179
00:10:31,239 --> 00:10:34,459
That's what people write books
and songs and poetry about?
180
00:10:35,460 --> 00:10:36,548
Chemicals?
181
00:10:36,592 --> 00:10:37,506
The way we smell?
182
00:10:38,594 --> 00:10:39,639
Yeah, pretty much.
183
00:10:41,423 --> 00:10:42,729
Yeah, I dunno.
184
00:10:53,348 --> 00:10:56,003
Okay, now I feel bad for
watching.
185
00:10:57,657 --> 00:11:01,704
Oh my god, how does that even
work?
186
00:11:03,314 --> 00:11:05,142
I think we're venturing
into can't be unseen
187
00:11:05,186 --> 00:11:06,448
territory.
No.
188
00:11:10,060 --> 00:11:14,282
As you know, the recent
gangland style murders
189
00:11:14,325 --> 00:11:17,633
at nearby Pettitville
Elementary School have given
190
00:11:17,677 --> 00:11:18,460
everyone in our community.
Did you do
191
00:11:18,503 --> 00:11:19,940
your college essays yet?
192
00:11:19,983 --> 00:11:21,593
No, my mom's paying someone to
do it.
193
00:11:21,637 --> 00:11:24,031
A pro, some guy she found on theinternet.
194
00:11:27,382 --> 00:11:31,603
Luckily, the School Board,
along with Coach Greene,
195
00:11:31,647 --> 00:11:33,693
using his position as head
196
00:11:33,736 --> 00:11:37,000
of Morgansfield Volunteer
Militia,
197
00:11:37,044 --> 00:11:39,394
have agreed upon a plan to keep
198
00:11:39,437 --> 00:11:42,876
us all safe at this unstable
time.
199
00:11:47,881 --> 00:11:49,578
Stevie D tried to kiss me.
200
00:11:49,621 --> 00:11:50,927
When?
After school.
201
00:11:50,971 --> 00:11:54,061
That plan involves arming
202
00:11:54,104 --> 00:11:57,238
and training our janitorial
staff.
203
00:11:59,327 --> 00:12:00,676
What?
Sometimes I am glad I'm ugly
204
00:12:00,720 --> 00:12:03,244
so I don't have d-bags hitting
on me.
205
00:12:03,287 --> 00:12:04,898
You're not ugly.
206
00:12:04,941 --> 00:12:06,769
You'll always be more popular
than me.
207
00:12:06,813 --> 00:12:08,423
If we didn't have ballet class
together when we were seven,
208
00:12:08,466 --> 00:12:10,207
we wouldn't be friends now.
Staff can become
209
00:12:10,251 --> 00:12:11,992
the good guys with the guns.
210
00:12:12,035 --> 00:12:13,558
See, what's that?
Hey.
211
00:12:16,344 --> 00:12:18,520
You gonna go be all cool withoutme?
212
00:12:19,956 --> 00:12:22,829
Our head janitor and newly named
213
00:12:22,872 --> 00:12:27,050
Chief of School Security, JaimeJimenez.
214
00:12:33,709 --> 00:12:35,929
Does this pity party have a
dress code?
215
00:12:35,972 --> 00:12:37,321
Just stop.
216
00:12:37,365 --> 00:12:39,106
What if I don't wanna stop?
I love the students
217
00:12:39,149 --> 00:12:40,803
in this school.
218
00:12:40,847 --> 00:12:45,852
But even more, I love to
be crime stopping hero
219
00:12:46,113 --> 00:12:47,679
shooting the bad guys.
220
00:12:49,116 --> 00:12:52,815
Thanks you for this
opportunity to live my dreams.
221
00:12:53,860 --> 00:12:57,907
And go tigers.
222
00:13:18,058 --> 00:13:20,538
Next on Knocked Up Castaways,
223
00:13:20,582 --> 00:13:24,804
Bree is 32 weeks and finds the
last coconut on St. Marcos.
224
00:13:26,893 --> 00:13:30,287
Janet, what's a five
letter word for mistake?
225
00:13:30,331 --> 00:13:32,202
Starts with a B?
226
00:13:32,246 --> 00:13:33,116
I don't know.
227
00:13:37,425 --> 00:13:39,514
Dad, do we have any ice cream?
228
00:13:39,557 --> 00:13:40,732
I ate the last.
229
00:13:40,776 --> 00:13:42,473
Thanks.
230
00:13:42,517 --> 00:13:43,779
Well there's peppermint cake.
231
00:13:43,823 --> 00:13:46,738
From like two years ago,
I hate peppermint cake.
232
00:13:46,782 --> 00:13:48,305
I know.
233
00:13:48,349 --> 00:13:50,264
That's why it's still there, I
guess.
234
00:13:52,614 --> 00:13:54,268
[Female Announcer] I used to
doubt myself.
235
00:13:54,311 --> 00:13:57,662
Worried about whether I was
good enough, pretty enough.
236
00:13:57,706 --> 00:14:00,665
If the things I felt were
wrong, or even crazy.
237
00:14:01,841 --> 00:14:05,061
That's why I talked to
my doctor about Femtrexl.
238
00:14:05,105 --> 00:14:07,107
If you are a woman 14-70
239
00:14:07,150 --> 00:14:11,328
and feel overwhelmed by your
feelings, Femtrexl can help.
240
00:14:11,372 --> 00:14:12,895
Femtrexl can also help you
241
00:14:12,939 --> 00:14:14,984
manage your weight without
dieting.
242
00:14:16,594 --> 00:14:18,422
For your free trial, call this
number
243
00:14:18,466 --> 00:14:20,860
or text to 56495.
244
00:14:23,384 --> 00:14:25,821
Possible side effects of
Femtrexl include dry mouth,
245
00:14:25,865 --> 00:14:27,605
irritability, hallucinations,
depression,
246
00:14:27,649 --> 00:14:28,955
suicidal thoughts, mood swings,
247
00:14:28,998 --> 00:14:30,521
and hormonal changes
including discontinuation
248
00:14:30,565 --> 00:14:32,132
of the menstrual cycle.
Boner.
249
00:14:32,175 --> 00:14:33,655
What?
250
00:14:33,698 --> 00:14:35,657
Boner, the word.
251
00:14:35,700 --> 00:14:36,701
Boner?
252
00:14:36,745 --> 00:14:37,746
That's the word?
253
00:14:37,789 --> 00:14:39,139
Yes, Dad.
254
00:14:39,182 --> 00:14:40,009
Boner.
255
00:15:28,666 --> 00:15:29,841
The security question
256
00:15:29,885 --> 00:15:32,583
is what was your favorite
teacher's name?
257
00:15:32,627 --> 00:15:34,194
If my memory was that good
258
00:15:34,237 --> 00:15:36,457
I wouldn't have forgotten my
stupid password to begin with.
259
00:15:36,500 --> 00:15:37,980
Prettygirl68.
260
00:15:38,024 --> 00:15:39,808
You only have two password.
261
00:15:39,851 --> 00:15:40,940
Oh great,
262
00:15:40,983 --> 00:15:41,941
now the person at the door knowsit, too.
263
00:15:41,984 --> 00:15:43,246
You worry too much.
264
00:15:43,290 --> 00:15:45,205
Nobody steal like that.
And all Christmas music
265
00:15:45,248 --> 00:15:47,424
is made in September.
266
00:15:47,468 --> 00:15:49,035
Tricking or treating?
267
00:15:49,078 --> 00:15:49,992
Is Kat home?
268
00:15:51,037 --> 00:15:52,516
She not home.
269
00:15:52,560 --> 00:15:54,475
Can I help you with something?
270
00:15:54,518 --> 00:15:56,433
We were supposed to do homeworktogether.
271
00:15:56,477 --> 00:15:57,869
Do you know where she is?
272
00:15:57,913 --> 00:15:59,132
It Halloween.
273
00:15:59,175 --> 00:16:00,655
She probably out there
frightening
274
00:16:00,698 --> 00:16:02,657
little children and old people.
275
00:16:02,700 --> 00:16:03,527
You want wait?
276
00:16:10,317 --> 00:16:12,797
You know, you have pretty face.
277
00:16:15,887 --> 00:16:16,976
Looking at you,
278
00:16:18,455 --> 00:16:21,937
I am thinking we can do
something very nice together.
279
00:16:21,981 --> 00:16:23,808
You might not like it at start,
280
00:16:23,852 --> 00:16:26,550
but it will make you feel very,very good.
281
00:16:27,899 --> 00:16:29,423
I show you.
282
00:16:29,466 --> 00:16:30,815
First time, no problem.
283
00:16:30,859 --> 00:16:34,384
No, I really don't--
Come on, it won't take long.
284
00:16:34,428 --> 00:16:35,733
There is room in basement.
285
00:16:46,005 --> 00:16:47,919
Is very good for burning fat.
286
00:16:52,750 --> 00:16:53,925
Okay, you try.
287
00:16:55,188 --> 00:16:56,058
Wait, wait.
288
00:16:56,102 --> 00:16:57,929
It's not bad time of month, no?
289
00:16:58,887 --> 00:16:59,670
No.
290
00:16:59,714 --> 00:17:01,020
Oh, good.
291
00:17:01,063 --> 00:17:03,370
Never exercise during that time,never.
292
00:17:03,413 --> 00:17:04,849
Also, no camping, okay?
293
00:17:04,893 --> 00:17:07,461
The smell, it attract bear
and wolf from miles away.
294
00:17:07,504 --> 00:17:09,158
You sure enough dead.
295
00:17:09,202 --> 00:17:12,422
It's okay, Asians don't camp
really.
296
00:17:13,510 --> 00:17:15,164
Interesting.
297
00:17:15,208 --> 00:17:16,035
Please.
298
00:17:17,732 --> 00:17:19,081
You do 20.
20?
299
00:17:19,125 --> 00:17:19,951
Yes.
300
00:17:19,995 --> 00:17:21,301
I've never done one.
301
00:17:22,606 --> 00:17:24,260
Okay.
Come on.
302
00:17:24,304 --> 00:17:25,653
Yeah, you can do it.
303
00:17:25,696 --> 00:17:26,523
Come on.
304
00:17:27,524 --> 00:17:29,744
Burn the baby fat, burn it.
305
00:17:29,787 --> 00:17:30,614
That hurts.
306
00:17:31,789 --> 00:17:35,532
In my country, women have
to be tough like boys.
307
00:17:35,576 --> 00:17:37,317
Is that to fight the bears?
308
00:17:37,360 --> 00:17:40,363
I am more traditional American
guy.
309
00:17:40,407 --> 00:17:42,365
I take care of money.
310
00:17:42,409 --> 00:17:44,237
She stay home and be pretty.
311
00:17:46,935 --> 00:17:48,197
Whoa.
312
00:17:48,241 --> 00:17:51,026
Easy there, Mike Tyson,
it's just exercise.
313
00:17:51,070 --> 00:17:52,071
Woo.
314
00:17:52,114 --> 00:17:53,594
You're a fast learner.
315
00:17:55,335 --> 00:17:57,815
Whoa, whoa, got an invite?
316
00:17:57,859 --> 00:17:59,382
Yo dog, I'm a s'more.
317
00:17:59,426 --> 00:18:02,168
Selling grams to crackers, you
feel me?
318
00:18:02,211 --> 00:18:03,560
Come on, man, no invite, no
party.
319
00:18:03,604 --> 00:18:05,780
Oh, come on man, help a brotherout.
320
00:18:06,650 --> 00:18:08,217
Get outta here.
321
00:18:08,261 --> 00:18:09,088
Next.
322
00:18:17,270 --> 00:18:19,359
Jesus, are you stalking me?
323
00:18:19,402 --> 00:18:20,490
Sometimes not that much
difference
324
00:18:20,534 --> 00:18:23,058
between extra friendly and
criminal.
325
00:18:24,842 --> 00:18:26,061
Nice costume.
326
00:18:26,105 --> 00:18:27,932
Who you supposed to be?
327
00:18:27,976 --> 00:18:29,847
I'm a Roy Lichtenstein painting.
328
00:18:31,110 --> 00:18:33,068
Lichtenstein, he's good.
329
00:18:34,113 --> 00:18:35,592
Can you sneak me in?
330
00:18:35,636 --> 00:18:37,028
No.
331
00:18:37,072 --> 00:18:38,987
Come on, we'll go in
together, it'll be super easy.
332
00:18:39,030 --> 00:18:40,989
I don't want to go back in, it'sboring.
333
00:18:42,512 --> 00:18:44,035
Well then at least could you letme
334
00:18:44,079 --> 00:18:45,515
took on that boom shaka laka.
335
00:18:59,877 --> 00:19:02,837
That's good, that relaxes me.
336
00:19:02,880 --> 00:19:03,838
I can see that.
337
00:19:05,361 --> 00:19:07,276
You know how like you can
338
00:19:07,320 --> 00:19:11,280
bring a dog on a plane
now without being blind?
339
00:19:12,499 --> 00:19:14,153
You just need like a
letter from your doctor
340
00:19:14,196 --> 00:19:16,111
that says it helps you relax.
341
00:19:16,155 --> 00:19:17,634
What kind of shit is that?
342
00:19:17,678 --> 00:19:18,548
Helps you relax.
343
00:19:18,592 --> 00:19:20,202
You know what helps me relax?
344
00:19:20,246 --> 00:19:21,812
A bong and a big booty stripper.
345
00:19:21,856 --> 00:19:23,814
They don't let me bring
that on a plane, though.
346
00:19:23,858 --> 00:19:25,468
Strippers, huh?
347
00:19:25,512 --> 00:19:26,774
You can't even get into
a high school party,
348
00:19:26,817 --> 00:19:28,689
how do you get let in a strip
club?
349
00:19:31,909 --> 00:19:33,520
What are you kids doing here?
350
00:19:33,563 --> 00:19:35,391
We live here.
351
00:19:35,435 --> 00:19:36,610
Brandon's our brother.
352
00:19:36,653 --> 00:19:39,090
He kicked us out until the
party's over.
353
00:19:39,134 --> 00:19:41,789
They're using my room
for corn oil wrestling.
354
00:19:41,832 --> 00:19:43,617
Where are your parents?
355
00:19:43,660 --> 00:19:45,009
In Costa Rica.
356
00:19:45,053 --> 00:19:46,141
I wanna go to bed.
357
00:19:47,142 --> 00:19:48,230
Why don't you guys talk
358
00:19:48,274 --> 00:19:49,666
to those nice men over there,
okay?
359
00:19:49,710 --> 00:19:50,841
They'll put you to bed.
360
00:19:53,670 --> 00:19:55,890
My bro sneaks me into
Sugars in Middlefield.
361
00:19:55,933 --> 00:19:57,631
Told 'em I was 25.
362
00:19:57,674 --> 00:19:58,806
They bought it, too.
363
00:19:58,849 --> 00:19:59,850
25?
364
00:19:59,894 --> 00:20:02,113
Is it a strip club for the
blind?
365
00:20:02,157 --> 00:20:05,116
Unicorn, freeze!
366
00:20:05,160 --> 00:20:06,248
High protein.
367
00:20:07,728 --> 00:20:10,252
Doesn't Kat's mom have a
business?
368
00:20:10,296 --> 00:20:11,949
She did.
369
00:20:11,993 --> 00:20:15,214
In Graysville, a vintage used
pillow shop.
370
00:20:15,257 --> 00:20:17,041
What happened to it?
371
00:20:17,085 --> 00:20:18,304
Bedbugs .
372
00:20:19,957 --> 00:20:22,003
People kept returning pillows
373
00:20:22,046 --> 00:20:23,961
with rash on side of face,
374
00:20:24,005 --> 00:20:28,444
red bites on the neck,
internet reviews not so good.
375
00:20:28,488 --> 00:20:29,924
Yeesh.
376
00:20:29,967 --> 00:20:32,405
Diane, very rich lady,
377
00:20:34,015 --> 00:20:36,322
not so smart at financials.
378
00:20:36,365 --> 00:20:40,804
When Vigara was coming out,
she invested in Spanish Fly.
379
00:20:43,198 --> 00:20:44,721
Nothing you need to understand.
380
00:20:53,339 --> 00:20:54,992
She is foolish to stay at work.
381
00:20:55,036 --> 00:20:59,693
Women are good at certain
things, feelings, love,
worrying.
382
00:20:59,954 --> 00:21:02,739
Men are good at other things.
383
00:21:02,783 --> 00:21:06,613
Money, killing, growing beard.
384
00:21:07,657 --> 00:21:09,050
Creating amazing technologies
385
00:21:09,093 --> 00:21:10,921
that will eventually destroy usall.
386
00:21:13,097 --> 00:21:13,924
Yes.
387
00:21:20,540 --> 00:21:22,237
I can't believe I'm doing this.
388
00:21:22,281 --> 00:21:23,151
Girl, why you frontin'?
389
00:21:23,194 --> 00:21:24,935
You wet as a mermaid.
390
00:21:28,156 --> 00:21:29,940
Do you have a condom?
391
00:21:29,984 --> 00:21:32,116
Chill baby, I got my golden
ticket.
392
00:21:34,293 --> 00:21:35,990
Are you sure it's on right?
393
00:21:36,033 --> 00:21:38,122
It's all good, all right?
394
00:21:38,166 --> 00:21:39,776
It's all good.
395
00:21:39,820 --> 00:21:40,821
Oh.
396
00:21:40,864 --> 00:21:42,388
Oh yeah.
397
00:21:42,431 --> 00:21:44,825
That's it, yeah.
398
00:21:44,868 --> 00:21:45,695
Oh, you nasty.
399
00:21:45,739 --> 00:21:49,177
Oh, oh, oh, atta boy.
400
00:21:49,220 --> 00:21:50,352
That's mama's home cookin' rightthere.
401
00:21:50,396 --> 00:21:52,311
Get the groceries, get the
groceries.
402
00:22:02,538 --> 00:22:03,713
Are you done?
403
00:22:03,757 --> 00:22:05,280
Yeah, baby.
404
00:22:05,324 --> 00:22:06,542
Like a ninja.
405
00:22:06,586 --> 00:22:08,283
Lightning fast with deadly
skill.
406
00:22:11,199 --> 00:22:12,026
Oh.
407
00:22:14,420 --> 00:22:16,030
I know, you're welcome.
408
00:22:17,597 --> 00:22:20,251
What are you kids, oh my God.
409
00:22:20,295 --> 00:22:21,992
Just get your clothes
on and get out of my car
410
00:22:22,036 --> 00:22:23,994
before I call the police.
411
00:22:25,344 --> 00:22:26,997
Are these yours or mine? These
are mine.
412
00:22:31,480 --> 00:22:34,396
Oh come on, you knew I didn't
have no car.
413
00:22:34,440 --> 00:22:35,789
You loved it.
414
00:22:35,832 --> 00:22:37,312
No, I can't say that I did.
415
00:22:38,792 --> 00:22:40,968
And you cannot tell anyone aboutthis.
416
00:22:48,454 --> 00:22:50,325
Jesus, are you psycho?
417
00:22:51,457 --> 00:22:52,283
Dude, where were you?
418
00:22:52,327 --> 00:22:53,415
Don't call me dude.
419
00:22:53,459 --> 00:22:56,200
I'm not your bro and it's not
4:20.
420
00:22:56,244 --> 00:22:57,201
What happened to your face?
421
00:22:57,245 --> 00:22:58,812
What were you doing?
422
00:23:00,466 --> 00:23:03,207
Just trying to be normal.
423
00:23:03,251 --> 00:23:05,209
You should try it sometime.
424
00:23:07,864 --> 00:23:09,475
We were supposed to do homework.
425
00:23:09,518 --> 00:23:11,302
Did you go to that party?
426
00:23:11,346 --> 00:23:12,652
Yeah, it was heinous anus.
427
00:23:12,695 --> 00:23:14,131
Be glad you weren't invited.
428
00:23:17,352 --> 00:23:18,397
You suck.
429
00:23:19,659 --> 00:23:21,487
Yeah, I probably do.
430
00:23:39,287 --> 00:23:40,331
It's her.
431
00:23:46,947 --> 00:23:48,296
What?
432
00:23:48,339 --> 00:23:49,253
Bathroom now.
433
00:23:53,257 --> 00:23:54,694
Is it true?
434
00:23:54,737 --> 00:23:56,478
You had sex with Smallie Smalls?
435
00:24:02,049 --> 00:24:03,485
Why?
436
00:24:03,529 --> 00:24:05,226
I don't know.
437
00:24:05,269 --> 00:24:06,575
You have failed me.
438
00:24:10,013 --> 00:24:11,406
Town bike?
439
00:24:12,363 --> 00:24:14,278
And look how he spells
Mayonnaise.
440
00:24:14,322 --> 00:24:15,410
Fuckin' retard.
441
00:24:16,498 --> 00:24:18,413
Who else has seen this?
442
00:24:18,457 --> 00:24:21,198
Well I've seen it, and I'm
always last.
443
00:24:28,684 --> 00:24:30,686
Okay, what do I do?
444
00:24:30,730 --> 00:24:31,948
Go home.
445
00:24:31,992 --> 00:24:33,776
Go to the nurse, say you have
bad cramps.
446
00:24:33,820 --> 00:24:35,474
I don't get my period
for another two weeks.
447
00:24:35,517 --> 00:24:38,128
She's not gonna check.
Right, right.
448
00:24:40,261 --> 00:24:41,915
I'm never gonna live this down.
449
00:24:42,916 --> 00:24:44,526
Maybe there'll be a shooting
later
450
00:24:44,570 --> 00:24:46,049
and people will forget all aboutthis.
451
00:24:58,497 --> 00:25:00,107
♪ Banjo I'm plunkin'
452
00:25:00,150 --> 00:25:01,587
♪ My flow is sky high
453
00:25:01,630 --> 00:25:03,153
♪ Yours is like a munchkin
454
00:25:03,197 --> 00:25:04,981
♪ That ass I be lovin
Hey!
455
00:25:11,727 --> 00:25:13,337
Hey, that is enough.
456
00:25:14,643 --> 00:25:16,210
I'll kill you, you fat bitch.
457
00:25:18,342 --> 00:25:21,520
Janet, we have a zero tolerancepolicy
458
00:25:21,563 --> 00:25:22,869
towards bullying at MorgansfieldHigh.
459
00:25:22,912 --> 00:25:24,784
He humiliated my friend.
460
00:25:24,827 --> 00:25:26,742
Your friend and her boyfriend
here
461
00:25:26,786 --> 00:25:30,833
having a little lover's spat
is no excuse for violence.
462
00:25:30,877 --> 00:25:32,313
No, no, no.
463
00:25:33,923 --> 00:25:36,186
And perhaps your friend should
think twice
464
00:25:36,230 --> 00:25:38,928
about announcing to the whole
school
465
00:25:38,972 --> 00:25:43,542
her personal matters the way shedid.
466
00:25:44,586 --> 00:25:48,459
We are going to be watching
your every move, young lady.
467
00:25:48,503 --> 00:25:51,288
Now, I want you both to stand
up.
468
00:25:52,594 --> 00:25:53,900
Come on, stand up.
469
00:25:57,425 --> 00:25:58,382
Look at each other.
470
00:26:00,646 --> 00:26:01,908
Now apologize.
471
00:26:03,823 --> 00:26:04,650
Do it!
472
00:26:05,825 --> 00:26:07,740
I sorry.
473
00:26:07,783 --> 00:26:10,569
I also sorry.
474
00:26:12,658 --> 00:26:13,484
Now hug.
475
00:26:13,528 --> 00:26:14,529
What?
476
00:26:14,573 --> 00:26:15,530
You heard me.
477
00:26:28,456 --> 00:26:30,110
I'm gonna kill you!
Ow!
478
00:26:32,155 --> 00:26:34,854
I swear to god you're gonna be
dead.
479
00:26:34,897 --> 00:26:35,724
Oh my god.
480
00:26:38,814 --> 00:26:43,819
Janet, you're a smart
girl and a good student.
481
00:26:44,690 --> 00:26:46,387
I think what we are dealing withhere
482
00:26:46,430 --> 00:26:48,911
is bigger than a little
student altercation.
483
00:26:50,260 --> 00:26:52,219
Now I think what we're dealing
with here
484
00:26:52,262 --> 00:26:53,612
is a medical problem.
485
00:26:55,352 --> 00:26:57,572
Let's see if we can deal with
this
486
00:26:57,616 --> 00:27:00,009
without too much trouble, shallwe?
487
00:27:11,107 --> 00:27:12,587
Dad, what's all this crap?
488
00:27:13,675 --> 00:27:15,546
A man from the school came by.
489
00:27:15,590 --> 00:27:16,678
Brought you your medicine.
490
00:27:16,722 --> 00:27:18,854
Says it'll help you with your
grades.
491
00:27:18,898 --> 00:27:20,203
Who came by?
492
00:27:20,247 --> 00:27:22,684
A medicine salesman, a doctor.
493
00:27:27,950 --> 00:27:29,125
This is stupid.
494
00:27:29,169 --> 00:27:30,605
I'm not gonna take it.
495
00:27:31,562 --> 00:27:33,173
Sweetie, you have to.
496
00:27:33,216 --> 00:27:35,566
If you wanna stay in school,
that's what the man said.
497
00:27:39,222 --> 00:27:40,049
Fuck.
498
00:28:10,645 --> 00:28:12,168
And in the 1980s,
499
00:28:12,212 --> 00:28:14,475
America gained its greatest
leader of the 20th Century.
500
00:28:14,518 --> 00:28:15,737
And that would be?
501
00:28:15,781 --> 00:28:17,347
Ronald Reagan.
502
00:28:17,391 --> 00:28:18,914
Correct.
503
00:28:18,958 --> 00:28:22,222
Ronald Reagan is the president
who deregulated the banks,
504
00:28:22,265 --> 00:28:25,138
allowing this country
to enjoy unprecedented
505
00:28:25,181 --> 00:28:27,575
corporate growth and prosperity.
506
00:28:27,618 --> 00:28:29,925
He also vetoed dangerous
legislation
507
00:28:29,969 --> 00:28:32,406
like the Clean Air Act
that would have crippled
508
00:28:32,449 --> 00:28:35,191
American industry in
the name of the unproven
509
00:28:35,235 --> 00:28:38,020
health risks of air pollution.
Ow.
510
00:28:40,370 --> 00:28:42,285
Is there a problem back there?
511
00:28:42,329 --> 00:28:43,678
No.
Well,
512
00:28:43,722 --> 00:28:46,420
perhaps you should go to
the principal's office
513
00:28:46,463 --> 00:28:49,118
if you're going to be
disrupting class like this.
514
00:28:54,558 --> 00:28:57,910
Ronald Reagan also created
tremendous business
opportunities
515
00:28:57,953 --> 00:29:01,783
by allowing the CIA to funnel
cocaine into urban areas,
516
00:29:01,827 --> 00:29:04,090
allowing young African
American entrepreneurs
517
00:29:04,133 --> 00:29:06,832
to create what?
518
00:29:06,875 --> 00:29:08,355
Crack cocaine.
519
00:29:08,398 --> 00:29:10,270
Yes, crack.
520
00:29:10,313 --> 00:29:11,140
Very good.
521
00:30:59,640 --> 00:31:02,251
I don't think this bus
stop is active anymore.
522
00:31:03,165 --> 00:31:04,645
Oh, I'm just counting cars.
523
00:31:06,081 --> 00:31:07,039
Ford Focus.
524
00:31:07,909 --> 00:31:09,868
Is this some kind of YouTube
thing?
525
00:31:11,521 --> 00:31:13,045
Subaru Outback.
526
00:31:13,088 --> 00:31:13,915
YouTube?
527
00:31:14,960 --> 00:31:16,744
Oh, right, no.
528
00:31:16,787 --> 00:31:17,876
It's a long story.
529
00:31:19,138 --> 00:31:21,618
If you're worried about your
safety, I won't be here long.
530
00:31:24,447 --> 00:31:25,840
My name is Rian.
531
00:31:25,884 --> 00:31:26,928
R-I-A-N.
532
00:31:28,930 --> 00:31:31,672
Sorry, I'm tripping or
something.
533
00:31:31,715 --> 00:31:32,542
Tripping?
534
00:31:33,456 --> 00:31:34,240
On drugs?
535
00:31:34,283 --> 00:31:35,154
Do you need a doctor?
536
00:31:35,197 --> 00:31:37,199
No, doctor gave them to me.
537
00:31:48,471 --> 00:31:52,084
So, why are you in a space?
538
00:31:52,127 --> 00:31:52,954
Janet?
539
00:31:55,087 --> 00:31:57,567
Would you like to go on a walk
with me?
540
00:31:57,611 --> 00:31:58,873
I didn't tell you my name.
541
00:31:58,917 --> 00:32:01,397
Yes you did, just right
before we shook hands.
542
00:32:05,967 --> 00:32:06,794
Sure.
543
00:32:12,321 --> 00:32:13,322
Oh, wow.
544
00:32:14,367 --> 00:32:15,281
Look at this.
545
00:32:17,413 --> 00:32:19,198
I thought these guys would
have all been killed off
546
00:32:19,241 --> 00:32:20,677
by pesticides by now.
547
00:32:23,811 --> 00:32:24,638
Make a wish.
548
00:32:25,769 --> 00:32:27,510
Don't tell me or it won't come
true.
549
00:32:36,737 --> 00:32:39,131
Aren't you hot in that suit?
550
00:32:39,174 --> 00:32:40,001
Well, there's germs out there
551
00:32:40,045 --> 00:32:42,003
that could be dangerous.
552
00:32:42,047 --> 00:32:44,397
May not have the immunity,
don't wanna risk it.
553
00:32:49,924 --> 00:32:51,534
Do you believe in UFOs?
554
00:32:51,578 --> 00:32:53,188
If aliens are visiting us,
555
00:32:53,232 --> 00:32:56,191
why is it always in some
cowboy town in New Mexico?
556
00:32:56,235 --> 00:32:59,107
Wouldn't they want to go
to the UN or something?
557
00:32:59,151 --> 00:33:01,849
Well, maybe because they're notaliens.
558
00:33:01,892 --> 00:33:03,329
They're us trying to hide.
559
00:33:03,372 --> 00:33:06,854
What, like secret government
junk?
560
00:33:07,681 --> 00:33:09,161
It's a mistake.
561
00:33:09,204 --> 00:33:10,771
That's why they never hang out.
562
00:33:11,946 --> 00:33:14,383
The closest galaxy that could
support life is the Andromeda,
563
00:33:14,427 --> 00:33:16,690
which is over two
million light years away.
564
00:33:16,733 --> 00:33:19,171
That's two million years of
travel.
565
00:33:19,214 --> 00:33:21,347
That's shitloads hella far.
566
00:33:21,390 --> 00:33:24,567
They would have to leave
before humans even existed.
567
00:33:24,611 --> 00:33:26,134
Even with faster than light
travel,
568
00:33:26,178 --> 00:33:29,050
which is still theoretical,
even with a Krasnikov tube,
569
00:33:29,094 --> 00:33:30,921
they'd come back home in five
years
570
00:33:30,965 --> 00:33:33,402
and 5000 years would have
passed.
571
00:33:33,446 --> 00:33:37,319
All your friends long
dead, nobody remembers you.
572
00:33:39,104 --> 00:33:41,497
And for what, Big Mac?
573
00:33:43,021 --> 00:33:44,196
The Grand Canyon, maybe?
574
00:33:45,936 --> 00:33:47,982
Not really worth the
trip, don't you think?
575
00:33:49,027 --> 00:33:50,028
You lost me, dude.
576
00:33:52,595 --> 00:33:54,336
People think time is this.
577
00:33:55,337 --> 00:33:57,122
But it's like this.
578
00:33:57,165 --> 00:33:59,080
Different times running
parallel,
579
00:33:59,124 --> 00:34:01,039
and sometimes they run into eachother.
580
00:34:03,171 --> 00:34:05,434
So, you're from the future now?
581
00:34:06,696 --> 00:34:09,482
What makes insane people
always wanna talk to me?
582
00:34:09,525 --> 00:34:11,310
Should I scowl more?
Did you ever do something
583
00:34:11,353 --> 00:34:12,398
that changed the whole course
584
00:34:12,441 --> 00:34:13,703
of your life from that moment
on?
585
00:34:15,314 --> 00:34:17,011
Or when things get weird
586
00:34:17,055 --> 00:34:19,318
and you think who's life is
this?
587
00:34:19,361 --> 00:34:20,493
Maybe you just slipped
588
00:34:20,536 --> 00:34:22,495
into one of your alternate timelines.
589
00:34:22,538 --> 00:34:24,584
You mean like right now?
590
00:34:24,627 --> 00:34:25,585
I'm time traveling?
591
00:34:25,628 --> 00:34:26,455
Well, sure.
592
00:34:27,326 --> 00:34:29,197
We're all time travelers.
593
00:34:29,241 --> 00:34:30,068
One, two,
594
00:34:31,199 --> 00:34:32,200
three, four.
595
00:34:34,159 --> 00:34:38,424
There we go, traveling
through time into the future.
596
00:34:39,903 --> 00:34:42,428
I think I'm too high for any ofthis.
597
00:34:42,471 --> 00:34:43,864
You're just a side effect
anyway.
598
00:34:43,907 --> 00:34:45,387
I'm imagining you.
599
00:34:50,479 --> 00:34:51,306
Ow.
600
00:34:53,613 --> 00:34:54,831
You sure I'm not real?
601
00:34:58,226 --> 00:35:00,185
I think I should be going home
now.
602
00:35:06,234 --> 00:35:10,630
I'm trippin' my tits off.
603
00:35:12,371 --> 00:35:14,851
I've never been outside so long.
604
00:35:14,895 --> 00:35:19,900
I feel sort of exposed.
605
00:35:29,823 --> 00:35:31,129
Janet.
606
00:35:32,434 --> 00:35:33,261
Janet.
607
00:35:54,413 --> 00:35:56,154
Time to get up, kiddo.
608
00:36:13,736 --> 00:36:14,607
Hey.
609
00:36:14,650 --> 00:36:16,652
Thanks for remembering I exist.
610
00:36:17,871 --> 00:36:19,612
Sorry, I'm freaking out.
611
00:36:20,787 --> 00:36:23,181
Can't decide which rad party togo to?
612
00:36:25,574 --> 00:36:27,097
I'm pregnant.
613
00:36:27,141 --> 00:36:28,664
What?
614
00:36:28,708 --> 00:36:30,188
Are you sure?
615
00:36:30,231 --> 00:36:31,711
I took the test.
616
00:36:32,625 --> 00:36:35,932
No way, I thought loser
face used a condom.
617
00:36:36,977 --> 00:36:40,285
I think he didn't, he just saidhe did.
618
00:36:40,328 --> 00:36:41,851
How hard do you want me
to hit him this time?
619
00:36:41,895 --> 00:36:43,244
No, he can't know.
620
00:36:43,288 --> 00:36:45,072
What are you gonna do?
621
00:36:45,115 --> 00:36:48,249
I don't know, I'm
thinking about keeping it.
622
00:36:49,163 --> 00:36:51,034
Yeah, 'cause every kid wants
623
00:36:51,078 --> 00:36:53,341
to be born to a 17 year old
and some random douchebag.
624
00:36:53,385 --> 00:36:55,125
No, that's the point.
625
00:36:55,169 --> 00:36:59,695
Maybe I can be the world's worstmom ever.
626
00:36:59,739 --> 00:37:02,307
Name it Hitler, cover
it with prison tattoos,
627
00:37:02,350 --> 00:37:05,353
really go all out with
it like an art project.
628
00:37:05,397 --> 00:37:07,094
You've had better ideas.
629
00:37:08,356 --> 00:37:11,185
If I go to the clinic,
will you come with me?
630
00:37:11,229 --> 00:37:12,099
My mom can't know.
631
00:37:12,142 --> 00:37:14,536
Her and Vlad will fucking flip.
632
00:37:14,580 --> 00:37:17,147
Yes, stupid questioner.
633
00:37:18,497 --> 00:37:19,933
Can you come over?
634
00:37:19,976 --> 00:37:21,021
And bring ice cream?
635
00:37:22,501 --> 00:37:24,154
Maybe.
636
00:37:24,198 --> 00:37:29,159
♪ I was there I heard the
crackling of the palms ♪
637
00:37:30,900 --> 00:37:33,076
♪ He came upstairs
Whoa.
638
00:37:33,120 --> 00:37:35,253
Was that Mr. Muckles?
639
00:37:35,296 --> 00:37:36,079
Uh huh.
640
00:37:36,123 --> 00:37:37,690
It's a miracle.
641
00:37:37,733 --> 00:37:40,910
I've known you 10 years and
I've seen that cat like twice.
642
00:37:40,954 --> 00:37:42,260
Maybe it's a bad sign.
643
00:37:52,357 --> 00:37:54,837
Two coats of paint and they
still glow.
644
00:37:56,056 --> 00:37:58,276
Deadly radiation killing us
both.
645
00:38:03,019 --> 00:38:04,456
Childhood refusing to leave
646
00:38:04,499 --> 00:38:06,022
even when asked nicely.
647
00:38:20,602 --> 00:38:22,300
Ms. Nuemann?
One second.
648
00:38:24,258 --> 00:38:26,086
I'm going to take you to
the see the doctor now.
649
00:38:26,129 --> 00:38:29,568
Is there anything you'd like
to say or any second thoughts?
650
00:38:29,611 --> 00:38:30,569
No.
651
00:38:30,612 --> 00:38:32,571
Do you have a ride home?
652
00:38:32,614 --> 00:38:34,790
And you don't have any
allergies to medication?
653
00:38:34,834 --> 00:38:36,966
No, just peanut butter.
654
00:38:37,924 --> 00:38:40,318
There are no peanuts
involved in the procedure.
655
00:38:44,017 --> 00:38:45,279
Dr. Blake?
656
00:38:45,323 --> 00:38:46,149
Hello, Katrine.
657
00:38:47,760 --> 00:38:49,718
You can't tell my mom about
this.
658
00:38:49,762 --> 00:38:52,678
My work here at the Woman's
Clinic is private and separate
659
00:38:52,721 --> 00:38:54,897
from my job as your family
pediatrician.
660
00:38:58,248 --> 00:38:59,685
I won't tell your mother.
661
00:39:04,167 --> 00:39:08,433
Y'know, I will never get over
my patients becoming adults.
662
00:39:08,476 --> 00:39:10,348
Seems like sooner every year.
663
00:39:11,784 --> 00:39:13,351
Sorry.
664
00:39:13,394 --> 00:39:16,179
I have eight year olds
menstruating.
665
00:39:16,223 --> 00:39:17,137
Yikes.
666
00:39:17,180 --> 00:39:18,443
I blame Fruit Roll-Ups.
667
00:39:19,705 --> 00:39:21,315
Anyway,
668
00:39:21,359 --> 00:39:23,839
how are you?
669
00:39:23,883 --> 00:39:25,145
Okay.
670
00:39:25,188 --> 00:39:26,755
Nervous.
671
00:39:26,799 --> 00:39:29,105
We're give you a mild
sedative, that should help.
672
00:39:30,455 --> 00:39:33,675
Are you gonna get me hopped
up on goofballs, Dr. Blake?
673
00:39:33,719 --> 00:39:35,155
No.
674
00:39:35,198 --> 00:39:37,070
No goofballs today, I'm afraid.
675
00:39:42,336 --> 00:39:47,341
Now Katrine, what we are
about to do is safe and legal.
676
00:39:47,646 --> 00:39:50,300
State law does not require
your parental consent
677
00:39:50,344 --> 00:39:52,172
or their knowledge of this
procedure.
678
00:39:53,303 --> 00:39:55,828
However, due to recent
changes in federal law,
679
00:39:55,871 --> 00:39:58,700
a police officer is required tobe here
680
00:39:58,744 --> 00:40:01,442
every time I do a procedure
681
00:40:01,486 --> 00:40:03,792
on an unmarried patient under
21.
682
00:40:20,505 --> 00:40:21,810
At your cervix.
683
00:40:36,477 --> 00:40:38,305
Quack, quack.
684
00:40:38,348 --> 00:40:39,828
Hello, Katrine.
685
00:40:44,529 --> 00:40:48,358
You're gonna feel a little
pressure, like a tummy ache.
686
00:40:57,542 --> 00:40:59,892
How's that sedative working?
687
00:41:07,508 --> 00:41:08,683
That's a good girl.
688
00:41:09,684 --> 00:41:10,468
Almost done.
689
00:41:13,296 --> 00:41:14,123
Almost.
690
00:41:35,710 --> 00:41:38,278
Three feet back, folks, that's
the law.
691
00:41:38,321 --> 00:41:39,584
Three feet back.
692
00:41:42,587 --> 00:41:44,806
You killed your baby, you whore!
693
00:41:44,850 --> 00:41:45,894
Shut up!
694
00:41:45,938 --> 00:41:47,200
You're going to go to hell.
Shut up!
695
00:41:47,243 --> 00:41:49,942
Murderer, murderer!
696
00:41:49,985 --> 00:41:54,947
I'm never having sex
again or anything else.
697
00:41:54,990 --> 00:41:55,817
Ever again.
698
00:41:57,471 --> 00:41:59,125
It's all gonna be fine.
699
00:43:42,750 --> 00:43:44,534
The definition of a traitor is
someone
700
00:43:44,578 --> 00:43:47,276
who betrays a country
or a sacred institution.
701
00:43:48,190 --> 00:43:49,888
A traitor is especially
dangerous
702
00:43:49,931 --> 00:43:51,803
because they destroy from where?
703
00:43:53,413 --> 00:43:54,414
From within.
704
00:43:57,678 --> 00:43:59,506
History has given us many famoustraitors
705
00:43:59,549 --> 00:44:02,683
whose treacherous deeds have
killed
706
00:44:02,727 --> 00:44:05,686
and corrupted untold lives.
707
00:44:05,730 --> 00:44:07,993
Judas, Benedict Arnold,
708
00:44:08,036 --> 00:44:11,083
Mata Hari, Jane Fonda.
709
00:44:11,126 --> 00:44:13,433
But none so deadly as the man
710
00:44:13,476 --> 00:44:16,001
you probably have already heardof,
711
00:44:16,915 --> 00:44:21,484
a dictator whose face and
name shall live in infamy.
712
00:44:22,703 --> 00:44:26,664
A man who, not so long ago,
a whole nation of wayward,
713
00:44:26,707 --> 00:44:30,972
supposedly civilized people
supported and even championed
714
00:44:31,016 --> 00:44:34,236
despite his evil, evil deeds.
715
00:44:42,462 --> 00:44:43,942
William Jefferson Clinton.
716
00:44:58,478 --> 00:45:00,088
How can they send you to sex
rehab
717
00:45:00,132 --> 00:45:01,829
when you've barely had sex?
718
00:45:03,309 --> 00:45:04,702
I hate growing up.
719
00:45:04,745 --> 00:45:06,747
Your mother's the devil.
720
00:45:06,791 --> 00:45:08,706
She's not that bad.
Fine.
721
00:45:08,749 --> 00:45:10,185
The devil's doula, then.
722
00:45:12,361 --> 00:45:14,276
Your mother's crazy.
723
00:45:14,320 --> 00:45:16,496
Yeah, ever since she
went through the change,
724
00:45:16,539 --> 00:45:19,281
she got that PBS totebag
and it was all over.
725
00:45:19,325 --> 00:45:21,457
The sure sign of menopause.
726
00:45:21,501 --> 00:45:22,763
How long will you be gone?
727
00:45:22,807 --> 00:45:25,810
They won't tell me, till I get
better.
728
00:45:27,115 --> 00:45:29,988
You are not a sex addict.
729
00:45:30,031 --> 00:45:31,685
She says that one of the signs
730
00:45:31,729 --> 00:45:33,469
of sex addiction is lying aboutit.
731
00:45:34,557 --> 00:45:37,038
No one's honest with
their parents about sex.
732
00:45:37,082 --> 00:45:38,474
Hey Mom, I'm going to the
football game
733
00:45:38,518 --> 00:45:40,520
to blow the starting lineup
behind the bleachers,
734
00:45:40,563 --> 00:45:42,217
be home by 11.
735
00:45:42,261 --> 00:45:43,436
Yeah.
736
00:45:43,479 --> 00:45:44,916
Will you visit me?
737
00:45:44,959 --> 00:45:46,787
It's like three hours away
and I won't have internet.
738
00:45:46,831 --> 00:45:48,354
Of course I'll visit.
739
00:45:49,398 --> 00:45:51,792
Mom and Vlad will just buy a dog
740
00:45:51,836 --> 00:45:53,576
and pretend I never happened.
741
00:46:05,632 --> 00:46:06,459
Hey.
742
00:46:07,852 --> 00:46:09,331
Excuse me, can we?
743
00:46:26,696 --> 00:46:28,611
Katrine, I know I failed you.
744
00:46:29,656 --> 00:46:30,744
If I was a good mother,
745
00:46:30,788 --> 00:46:32,920
we would have talked about thesethings.
746
00:46:32,964 --> 00:46:35,967
Mistakes you've made, mistakes
I've made.
747
00:46:37,185 --> 00:46:39,361
But at least now, before you goaway,
748
00:46:39,405 --> 00:46:40,798
we have some time to do that.
749
00:46:41,755 --> 00:46:43,626
Mom, is that really necessary?
750
00:46:43,670 --> 00:46:47,456
Yes, yeah it is.
751
00:46:47,500 --> 00:46:49,850
As long as we have.
You have four hours,
752
00:46:49,894 --> 00:46:52,505
29 minutes to your destination.
753
00:46:52,548 --> 00:46:55,203
As long as we have these
four hours and 29 minutes
754
00:46:55,247 --> 00:46:57,640
together we're gonna make the
most of it.
755
00:47:02,732 --> 00:47:04,473
Look, I'm old.
756
00:47:04,517 --> 00:47:07,041
When I was your age, the
rainbow hanging in the window
757
00:47:07,085 --> 00:47:08,782
of a store meant that
they sold televisions
758
00:47:08,826 --> 00:47:09,739
that were in color.
759
00:47:10,653 --> 00:47:13,831
I don't pretend to know what a
popular,
760
00:47:13,874 --> 00:47:17,530
beautiful young woman goes
through in the 21st century.
761
00:47:17,573 --> 00:47:19,140
Perhaps you can enlighten me.
762
00:47:20,533 --> 00:47:21,926
Well, I guess you'd have to asksomeone
763
00:47:21,969 --> 00:47:24,015
who was popular and beautiful.
764
00:47:26,365 --> 00:47:28,802
Why are you avoiding this
intimate
765
00:47:28,846 --> 00:47:30,891
mother daughter bonding time?
766
00:47:30,935 --> 00:47:32,197
Why?
767
00:47:32,240 --> 00:47:33,067
Why?
768
00:47:34,503 --> 00:47:35,330
Dammit.
769
00:47:40,945 --> 00:47:42,468
Okay.
770
00:47:42,511 --> 00:47:44,731
If you can't be honest with
me, I'll be honest with you.
771
00:47:45,732 --> 00:47:46,776
You know how I told your father
772
00:47:46,820 --> 00:47:48,430
I got herpes from a yoga mat?
773
00:47:50,476 --> 00:47:51,303
Well, I didn't.
774
00:47:53,783 --> 00:47:55,524
Let's just leave it at that.
775
00:47:55,568 --> 00:47:58,049
Yes, let's please.
776
00:48:02,314 --> 00:48:05,143
♪ I am in love with the
McDonald's girl ♪
777
00:48:05,186 --> 00:48:08,668
Oh, you used to love this
song when you were little.
778
00:48:08,711 --> 00:48:11,671
♪ I am in love with the
McDonald's girl ♪
779
00:48:11,714 --> 00:48:13,151
Come on, you know the words.
780
00:48:13,194 --> 00:48:14,326
No, stop.
781
00:48:14,369 --> 00:48:16,284
♪ She is an angel in the
polyester uni ♪
782
00:48:16,328 --> 00:48:18,721
Come on, sing along.
No, I don't.
783
00:48:21,855 --> 00:48:23,726
Why do you hate me so much?
784
00:48:25,076 --> 00:48:27,339
♪ She's taking orders from the
Saddle River Little League ♪
785
00:48:27,382 --> 00:48:28,775
What did I do?
786
00:48:28,818 --> 00:48:32,474
♪ If they knew how much I wantedher ♪
787
00:48:50,579 --> 00:48:51,406
Katrine!
788
00:48:52,320 --> 00:48:53,626
Katrine!
789
00:48:53,669 --> 00:48:57,282
Oh my god, Katrine what are youdoing?
790
00:48:57,325 --> 00:48:59,066
I got you a Big Gulp.
791
00:49:00,328 --> 00:49:02,765
Why are you doing this to me?
792
00:49:05,203 --> 00:49:07,205
How old is the boy who got you
pregnant?
793
00:49:08,858 --> 00:49:09,772
16.
794
00:49:10,773 --> 00:49:14,342
Okay, I'll explain it to you
again.
795
00:49:14,386 --> 00:49:17,998
Emotionally, socially, men
are actually 10 years younger
796
00:49:18,042 --> 00:49:19,565
than their actual age.
797
00:49:19,608 --> 00:49:23,786
So by that rule, a 34 year
old man would actually be 24,
798
00:49:23,830 --> 00:49:28,748
and therefore your current
sex partner is how old?
799
00:49:30,750 --> 00:49:32,273
Six.
800
00:49:32,317 --> 00:49:33,144
See?
801
00:49:34,623 --> 00:49:36,930
Don't you wish we'd had
this conversation sooner?
802
00:49:47,723 --> 00:49:49,464
Welcome.
803
00:49:49,508 --> 00:49:51,858
Okay, I want to start by
everyone giving
804
00:49:51,901 --> 00:49:54,687
a short description, or even
just a word,
805
00:49:54,730 --> 00:49:56,167
of the incident or the moment
806
00:49:56,210 --> 00:49:58,647
where you realized you needed toget help.
807
00:50:02,434 --> 00:50:06,438
I spent my wife and I's entire
401K
808
00:50:06,481 --> 00:50:10,485
in the VIP room at Mr.
Dandy's, a strip club.
809
00:50:10,529 --> 00:50:12,096
In one weekend.
Mr. Dandy's?
810
00:50:13,184 --> 00:50:14,054
Who'd you see?
811
00:50:14,098 --> 00:50:15,664
Brandy, Veronica?
812
00:50:15,708 --> 00:50:17,231
Let's stay focused, please.
813
00:50:18,711 --> 00:50:23,324
Well at work, I was too
busy pleasuring myself
814
00:50:23,368 --> 00:50:28,025
instead of doing my job, andpeople were hurt because of it.
815
00:50:28,068 --> 00:50:29,983
What's your job, Dan?
816
00:50:30,027 --> 00:50:31,028
Was my job.
817
00:50:31,898 --> 00:50:33,595
High speed train conductor.
818
00:50:35,206 --> 00:50:39,993
Four words, talk now to live
girls.
819
00:50:40,863 --> 00:50:43,344
Uh, that's five words but thankyou, Phil.
820
00:50:44,519 --> 00:50:47,870
Foreign objects lost in my
rectum.
821
00:50:47,914 --> 00:50:49,133
Thank you, Wayne.
822
00:50:49,176 --> 00:50:50,917
Had to go to the hospital.
823
00:50:50,960 --> 00:50:51,831
Yes, we see.
824
00:50:54,660 --> 00:50:57,228
I don't think I really belong
here.
825
00:50:57,271 --> 00:50:59,926
Obviously, you're alone in thatopinion.
826
00:50:59,969 --> 00:51:02,320
I've had sex with, like, two
guys.
827
00:51:02,363 --> 00:51:06,585
It's not how you have
sex, it's how sex has you.
828
00:51:07,890 --> 00:51:09,153
Everyone here needs to be honest
829
00:51:09,196 --> 00:51:11,329
with themselves and with each
other.
830
00:51:13,722 --> 00:51:17,074
Okay, I slept with a jerk from
my school
831
00:51:17,117 --> 00:51:19,685
because I was bored.
832
00:51:19,728 --> 00:51:21,904
I got high and I guess
I thought he was funny.
833
00:51:24,037 --> 00:51:25,169
Better, thank you.
834
00:51:28,694 --> 00:51:30,348
Neighbor's Saint Bernard.
835
00:51:49,410 --> 00:51:51,586
Janet, what are you doing?
836
00:51:58,071 --> 00:51:59,028
Watching TV, Dad.
837
00:52:27,231 --> 00:52:29,407
We can't do this, they're
gonna kick us out.
838
00:52:29,450 --> 00:52:32,192
No, it's okay, I have
my cloaking device on.
839
00:52:32,236 --> 00:52:33,672
As long as you're within six
feet of me,
840
00:52:33,715 --> 00:52:34,847
no one can see us.
841
00:52:36,283 --> 00:52:38,111
I'm sorry, this is just weird.
842
00:52:38,155 --> 00:52:39,286
I don't even go to real dances.
843
00:52:39,330 --> 00:52:41,506
That's why it'll be fun.
844
00:52:43,464 --> 00:52:45,814
Miss, can I help you?
845
00:52:45,858 --> 00:52:48,339
Nope, no, just leaving.
846
00:52:56,129 --> 00:52:57,261
You're nuts.
847
00:52:57,304 --> 00:52:59,263
Just keep dancing, nobody'll
notice.
848
00:53:03,832 --> 00:53:07,619
So, what do you dream about?
849
00:53:09,098 --> 00:53:10,883
Last night I was riding a giantspoon
850
00:53:10,926 --> 00:53:14,408
that plunged into a lake of
Mrs. Freshy's cake frosting.
851
00:53:14,452 --> 00:53:17,106
No, like something you want to
happen.
852
00:53:18,369 --> 00:53:19,457
World peace?
853
00:53:19,500 --> 00:53:21,110
Something attainable.
854
00:53:21,154 --> 00:53:22,111
An end forever to the scourge
855
00:53:22,155 --> 00:53:23,635
of the backwards baseball cap.
856
00:53:27,465 --> 00:53:28,640
How about in guys?
857
00:53:30,294 --> 00:53:31,817
What do you like, tall, short?
858
00:53:32,644 --> 00:53:34,341
Brown, yellow, green?
859
00:53:34,385 --> 00:53:35,951
Someone who doesn't annoy me.
860
00:53:38,476 --> 00:53:41,435
They can't use the word gay to
describe something they hate.
861
00:53:43,568 --> 00:53:45,526
Someone who's not afraid
to hold my hand in public
862
00:53:45,570 --> 00:53:47,180
even though I have fat fingers,
863
00:53:50,705 --> 00:53:52,490
who looks me in the eyes when Italk
864
00:53:54,840 --> 00:53:56,189
and smiles when I'm telling a
story,
865
00:53:56,233 --> 00:53:58,191
even though I haven't got
to the funny part yet.
866
00:53:59,323 --> 00:54:00,454
Dumb stuff like that.
867
00:54:05,416 --> 00:54:08,810
And what do you dream about?
868
00:54:09,985 --> 00:54:10,769
You.
869
00:54:18,907 --> 00:54:21,780
Maybe next time we can
do this with my suit off.
870
00:54:21,823 --> 00:54:23,695
I wouldn't want to get you sick.
871
00:54:24,696 --> 00:54:26,524
I think you're worth the risk.
872
00:54:29,266 --> 00:54:31,790
I don't have your phone number.
873
00:54:31,833 --> 00:54:34,271
Why would you assume that
I have a cellular phone?
874
00:54:35,663 --> 00:54:37,186
I mean,
875
00:54:37,230 --> 00:54:40,538
I'm kind of sad I wasn't
born in the time before TVs.
876
00:54:40,581 --> 00:54:41,974
People had to use their
imaginations,
877
00:54:42,017 --> 00:54:44,716
cook, talk to each other, leavethe house.
878
00:54:44,759 --> 00:54:45,804
Just thought I'd ask.
879
00:54:45,847 --> 00:54:46,761
Cell phones are bad for
humanity.
880
00:54:46,805 --> 00:54:48,154
I get it.
881
00:54:48,197 --> 00:54:50,112
I know where you live, though.
882
00:54:50,156 --> 00:54:50,983
Okay.
883
00:54:52,114 --> 00:54:54,334
I guess it's more fun this way.
884
00:54:54,378 --> 00:54:55,204
Sorta.
885
00:55:13,092 --> 00:55:14,180
Katrine, it's Phil.
886
00:55:14,223 --> 00:55:15,486
Are you awake?
887
00:55:16,704 --> 00:55:18,227
And Mike.
888
00:55:19,359 --> 00:55:21,405
We just want to hang out and
talk.
889
00:55:21,448 --> 00:55:22,928
Are you asleep?
890
00:55:22,971 --> 00:55:25,104
We're not gonna touch you.
891
00:55:25,147 --> 00:55:26,801
Unless you really want us to.
892
00:55:26,845 --> 00:55:29,587
Yeah, if you want us to, that'scool.
893
00:55:29,630 --> 00:55:31,066
I mean, that'd be totally
awesome.
894
00:55:31,110 --> 00:55:33,373
You don't have to make
that decision right now.
895
00:55:33,417 --> 00:55:36,028
Yeah, yeah, just let us come
inside.
896
00:55:53,219 --> 00:55:55,352
Where's the visiting place?
897
00:55:55,395 --> 00:55:56,875
I can't have visitors.
898
00:55:56,918 --> 00:55:58,006
What?
899
00:55:58,050 --> 00:56:00,357
I spent five hours on the bus.
900
00:56:00,400 --> 00:56:02,533
I know, I know, we're in
lockdown.
901
00:56:02,576 --> 00:56:03,708
I'm not supposed to have my
phone, either.
902
00:56:03,751 --> 00:56:04,926
They catch me and--
What?
903
00:56:04,970 --> 00:56:06,101
Why?
904
00:56:06,145 --> 00:56:07,102
One of the guys got caught
905
00:56:07,146 --> 00:56:08,408
with a Victoria's Secret catalog
906
00:56:08,452 --> 00:56:11,411
and they have this zero
tolerance porn policy.
907
00:56:11,455 --> 00:56:14,153
So I'm just supposed to go home?
908
00:56:14,196 --> 00:56:16,416
I see you, come to the
window on the right.
909
00:56:18,897 --> 00:56:20,202
Come out.
910
00:56:20,246 --> 00:56:22,074
I can't hear you.
911
00:56:22,117 --> 00:56:23,467
Come out.
912
00:56:23,510 --> 00:56:27,514
We're in lockdown, and
they're tracking my phone.
913
00:56:42,660 --> 00:56:44,096
I've been busy.
914
00:56:52,670 --> 00:56:55,542
I'm on Femtrexl, it
makes it hard to think.
915
00:56:58,197 --> 00:57:00,808
I met a guy, at least I think Idid.
916
00:57:07,685 --> 00:57:08,512
His name's Rian.
917
00:57:10,035 --> 00:57:11,297
He's from the future.
918
00:57:16,433 --> 00:57:18,086
I don't even know if he's real.
919
00:57:28,967 --> 00:57:29,750
Maybe.
920
00:57:32,231 --> 00:57:33,798
Are you?
921
00:57:33,841 --> 00:57:36,061
Katrine Neumann, we know you'redown here.
922
00:57:36,104 --> 00:57:37,192
You have to get me out of here,
923
00:57:37,236 --> 00:57:39,847
it's like prison but with worsepeople.
924
00:57:39,891 --> 00:57:40,718
How?
925
00:57:41,719 --> 00:57:43,242
Why aren't you helping me?
Oh my god.
926
00:57:43,285 --> 00:57:46,332
You were supposed to be my
friend, Janet.
927
00:57:46,375 --> 00:57:47,942
Fuck off me!
928
00:57:47,986 --> 00:57:49,161
Kat!
929
00:57:53,339 --> 00:57:54,166
Shit!
930
00:58:03,349 --> 00:58:04,698
Hey, it's Kat.
931
00:58:04,742 --> 00:58:05,612
Leave a message.
932
00:58:18,407 --> 00:58:20,322
If you're calling me,
you're probably someone
933
00:58:20,366 --> 00:58:22,542
who abandoned me and let
me down when I needed you.
934
00:58:22,586 --> 00:58:24,849
Take a good look at
yourself in the mirror.
935
00:58:24,892 --> 00:58:26,328
You know who you are.
936
00:58:26,372 --> 00:58:28,809
Don't leave a message because
I won't call you back.
937
01:00:04,165 --> 01:00:05,776
Sorry to scare you.
938
01:00:05,819 --> 01:00:07,255
I thought it'd be romantic to
just come through the window.
939
01:00:07,299 --> 01:00:10,041
Yeah, kidnappers and rapists,
every girl's favorite.
940
01:00:10,084 --> 01:00:11,520
Can you help me?
941
01:00:11,564 --> 01:00:12,391
Sure.
942
01:00:18,092 --> 01:00:19,659
I missed you, Janet.
943
01:00:19,703 --> 01:00:20,965
I missed you, too.
944
01:00:21,008 --> 01:00:23,489
I think about you all the time.
945
01:00:23,532 --> 01:00:25,273
It's like I'm obsessed with you.
946
01:00:25,317 --> 01:00:26,884
Thanks, I guess.
947
01:00:28,146 --> 01:00:28,973
Me, too.
948
01:00:40,158 --> 01:00:41,507
Are you alone?
949
01:00:41,550 --> 01:00:43,901
My dad's downstairs
listening to books on tape.
950
01:00:43,944 --> 01:00:44,989
He can't hear us.
951
01:00:51,952 --> 01:00:53,127
I've never done this before.
952
01:00:54,433 --> 01:00:56,391
It's okay, if you don't want.
953
01:01:10,623 --> 01:01:12,538
I don't know anything about you.
954
01:01:12,581 --> 01:01:14,018
What else do you need to know?
955
01:01:15,236 --> 01:01:16,716
Are you real?
956
01:01:16,760 --> 01:01:18,196
Reality is anything the majority
957
01:01:18,239 --> 01:01:19,632
of people agree to be true.
958
01:01:20,807 --> 01:01:22,591
Why do you say that?
959
01:01:22,635 --> 01:01:23,897
I only see you when I take my
meds.
960
01:01:23,941 --> 01:01:25,290
You take your meds a lot.
961
01:01:27,901 --> 01:01:28,989
Do you think I'm real?
962
01:01:31,383 --> 01:01:33,385
Well, so do I.
963
01:01:33,428 --> 01:01:36,127
And we're the majority.
964
01:01:37,737 --> 01:01:38,782
Good enough for me.
965
01:01:43,917 --> 01:01:47,704
Do you wanna take off
the, you must be hot.
966
01:01:49,227 --> 01:01:50,663
Sure, yeah.
967
01:01:50,707 --> 01:01:51,533
So far, so good.
968
01:02:18,082 --> 01:02:20,301
This is unexpected, but.
969
01:02:39,756 --> 01:02:40,800
Are you okay?
970
01:02:43,281 --> 01:02:44,108
I'm sorry.
971
01:02:45,979 --> 01:02:46,806
It's fine.
972
01:02:49,983 --> 01:02:51,245
I can't.
973
01:02:51,289 --> 01:02:52,116
I'm sorry.
974
01:02:53,247 --> 01:02:54,640
What can I do?
975
01:02:54,683 --> 01:02:56,120
An hour in de-con.
976
01:03:00,689 --> 01:03:02,822
Is there somewhere we can
go where you'll be okay?
977
01:03:02,866 --> 01:03:04,171
I'm sorry.
978
01:03:04,215 --> 01:03:05,042
Rian.
979
01:03:06,521 --> 01:03:08,306
I'll come back for you.
980
01:03:08,349 --> 01:03:10,612
We'll go away, you and I,
981
01:03:11,918 --> 01:03:13,006
where we can be safe.
982
01:03:17,924 --> 01:03:18,795
When?
983
01:03:20,013 --> 01:03:20,840
Soon.
984
01:03:43,950 --> 01:03:47,301
Are these friends of yours, Kat?
985
01:03:47,345 --> 01:03:48,433
Okay.
986
01:03:48,476 --> 01:03:51,088
Have a wonderful rest of your
evening.
987
01:03:56,571 --> 01:03:59,879
Useful phrases while visiting
France.
988
01:04:01,054 --> 01:04:05,015
Nice to meet you, but
can't we just shake hands?
989
01:04:13,675 --> 01:04:16,809
Should I worry about that smell?
990
01:04:22,946 --> 01:04:25,209
My colossal American ass
991
01:04:25,252 --> 01:04:29,126
will not fit in your tiny
European car.
992
01:05:15,912 --> 01:05:17,391
Mom?
993
01:05:17,435 --> 01:05:19,350
What the hell?
994
01:05:19,393 --> 01:05:21,352
Vlad.
995
01:05:21,395 --> 01:05:22,222
He's gone!
996
01:05:23,745 --> 01:05:24,616
Oh, is that all?
997
01:05:24,659 --> 01:05:26,444
Jesus, I thought you were dying.
998
01:05:26,487 --> 01:05:28,750
Everything is gone.
999
01:05:28,794 --> 01:05:30,361
Everything is gone.
1000
01:05:34,495 --> 01:05:35,322
Get up.
1001
01:05:37,237 --> 01:05:38,543
Come on, get up.
1002
01:05:38,586 --> 01:05:39,413
I can't.
1003
01:05:41,024 --> 01:05:41,850
I can't.
1004
01:05:43,461 --> 01:05:44,810
Come on.
1005
01:05:48,770 --> 01:05:50,207
No, we're done with this now.
1006
01:06:03,611 --> 01:06:06,440
So tell me again, the savings?
1007
01:06:07,398 --> 01:06:08,225
Empty.
1008
01:06:09,269 --> 01:06:10,096
Checking?
1009
01:06:11,184 --> 01:06:13,447
$200.
1010
01:06:13,491 --> 01:06:14,927
Real generous.
1011
01:06:15,884 --> 01:06:17,408
My college fund?
1012
01:06:17,451 --> 01:06:18,278
Gone.
1013
01:06:19,149 --> 01:06:20,715
Poof.
1014
01:06:20,759 --> 01:06:24,502
Credit cards maxed out with cashadvances.
1015
01:06:24,545 --> 01:06:26,025
Okay Mom, we have to find him.
1016
01:06:26,069 --> 01:06:27,113
Where did he go?
1017
01:06:27,157 --> 01:06:29,376
Probably back to Slovakia.
1018
01:06:31,074 --> 01:06:32,510
He could be down the street.
1019
01:06:33,685 --> 01:06:36,688
Vlad was a very mysterious man.
1020
01:06:37,819 --> 01:06:40,387
What did he actually do for a
living?
1021
01:06:41,258 --> 01:06:44,522
Import export and online
financial services.
1022
01:06:45,697 --> 01:06:47,307
What does that even mean?
1023
01:06:47,351 --> 01:06:49,527
Christ, I don't know.
1024
01:06:49,570 --> 01:06:54,053
You, as a recovering sex addictshould know that sometimes
1025
01:06:54,097 --> 01:06:59,058
love and desire takes you
to very dangerous places.
1026
01:07:01,365 --> 01:07:05,456
I went there with your father
and I went there with Vlad,
1027
01:07:05,499 --> 01:07:08,372
and now this is my punishment.
1028
01:07:16,380 --> 01:07:19,122
Katrine, I know you think
I've failed you as a mother,
1029
01:07:20,340 --> 01:07:23,430
but I would appreciate
if you could at least try
1030
01:07:23,474 --> 01:07:26,390
to be a little bit supportive
in my time of crisis.
1031
01:07:26,433 --> 01:07:29,045
Okay, okay, Mom, don't bug out.
1032
01:07:29,958 --> 01:07:31,395
Someday you'll understand.
1033
01:07:32,613 --> 01:07:34,093
Dating when you're middle-aged
1034
01:07:34,137 --> 01:07:36,052
is like shopping at a used car
lot.
1035
01:07:37,096 --> 01:07:39,055
Choose the best you can but justremember
1036
01:07:39,098 --> 01:07:41,666
that there's something
wrong with all of them.
1037
01:07:44,364 --> 01:07:46,105
Come on, give me a hug.
1038
01:07:47,019 --> 01:07:49,239
Don't you think I deserve
at least that much?
1039
01:08:49,212 --> 01:08:50,038
Rian,
1040
01:08:50,996 --> 01:08:52,128
where are you?
1041
01:09:13,236 --> 01:09:14,062
Rian?
1042
01:09:43,266 --> 01:09:44,832
Sweetheart?
1043
01:09:46,660 --> 01:09:47,574
Sweetheart?
1044
01:09:49,272 --> 01:09:51,143
Are you sick, pumpkin?
1045
01:09:51,187 --> 01:09:53,406
What's happening?
1046
01:09:53,450 --> 01:09:56,017
Been trying to wake you all
morning.
1047
01:09:56,061 --> 01:09:58,455
Did you stay up late on
the computer last night?
1048
01:10:01,980 --> 01:10:04,461
I have a letter from the
University.
1049
01:10:15,123 --> 01:10:15,950
I got in.
1050
01:10:17,082 --> 01:10:19,911
Well look at that, miss smarty
pants.
1051
01:10:22,609 --> 01:10:24,785
Now we just have to figure
out how to pay for it.
1052
01:10:30,574 --> 01:10:34,230
Well, I'll leave you alone
so you can call your friends.
1053
01:10:50,028 --> 01:10:51,595
We're sorry,
1054
01:10:51,638 --> 01:10:53,336
the number you have dialed is
not in service at this time.
1055
01:10:53,379 --> 01:10:54,467
Goddammit.
1056
01:11:19,144 --> 01:11:24,149
♪ Sunlight say grace to the
cold stone I'm waiting ♪
1057
01:11:28,240 --> 01:11:33,245
♪ For that firelight god
to lift his darkened eyes ♪
1058
01:11:35,029 --> 01:11:35,856
Rian?
1059
01:11:37,075 --> 01:11:37,902
Rian!
1060
01:11:38,772 --> 01:11:43,299
♪ And don't fear the skies
they know no need for reason ♪
1061
01:11:43,342 --> 01:11:44,343
Rian.
1062
01:11:44,387 --> 01:11:45,257
Rian, wait!
1063
01:11:47,912 --> 01:11:52,917
♪ The stars can't keep that
shiny dancing charade ♪
1064
01:11:54,179 --> 01:11:55,006
Goodbye.
1065
01:11:58,270 --> 01:12:02,405
♪ But oh, to feel your eyes on
me ♪
1066
01:12:07,410 --> 01:12:08,541
I love you.
1067
01:12:08,585 --> 01:12:12,371
♪ To want nothing, and
everything ♪
1068
01:12:32,304 --> 01:12:33,349
Hey, miss.
1069
01:12:36,439 --> 01:12:38,615
Stop.
1070
01:12:38,658 --> 01:12:41,748
Miss!
1071
01:12:41,792 --> 01:12:42,619
Please.
1072
01:12:45,099 --> 01:12:48,581
♪ Mo me mi mo mu
1073
01:12:48,625 --> 01:12:50,627
♪ Hm
1074
01:12:50,670 --> 01:12:54,195
♪ Mo me mi mo mu
1075
01:12:54,239 --> 01:12:55,022
♪ Hm
1076
01:12:55,066 --> 01:12:58,112
♪ Mo me mi mo mu
1077
01:12:58,156 --> 01:12:58,983
♪ Hm
1078
01:12:59,026 --> 01:13:02,421
♪ Mo me mi mo mu
1079
01:13:02,465 --> 01:13:03,248
♪ Hm
1080
01:13:03,291 --> 01:13:06,512
♪ Mo me mi mo mu
1081
01:13:06,556 --> 01:13:09,341
♪ Hm
1082
01:13:50,643 --> 01:13:51,992
Hey.
1083
01:13:52,036 --> 01:13:53,037
Hey.
1084
01:13:59,043 --> 01:14:00,958
I got into Northmore.
1085
01:14:01,915 --> 01:14:02,960
That's great.
1086
01:14:04,657 --> 01:14:05,528
Did you hear?
1087
01:14:06,529 --> 01:14:08,444
Yeah, Farnham turned me down.
1088
01:14:09,532 --> 01:14:10,794
I can't afford to go anyway,
1089
01:14:10,837 --> 01:14:15,538
so I'm just gonna work
and reapply next year.
1090
01:14:21,195 --> 01:14:24,242
Pretty embarrassing, huh?
1091
01:14:24,285 --> 01:14:26,287
I should've just changed in thecar.
1092
01:14:28,768 --> 01:14:31,292
I'm sorry I didn't write
while you were away.
1093
01:14:32,424 --> 01:14:34,687
I thought you had lots
of other cooler friends.
1094
01:14:35,949 --> 01:14:37,473
Friends, yeah, no.
1095
01:14:41,259 --> 01:14:42,086
Sorry.
1096
01:14:44,784 --> 01:14:47,918
I probably wasn't exactly the
best friend to you, either.
1097
01:14:50,529 --> 01:14:51,356
We're lame.
1098
01:14:52,575 --> 01:14:54,968
Yeah, yeah we are.
1099
01:15:01,366 --> 01:15:02,367
Rian was real.
1100
01:15:05,283 --> 01:15:09,243
I thought I was losing
it, but he was real.
1101
01:15:11,594 --> 01:15:12,464
He's gone, though.
1102
01:15:14,248 --> 01:15:18,514
Yay and boo, I guess.
1103
01:15:21,299 --> 01:15:23,649
I guess I should go.
1104
01:15:27,435 --> 01:15:28,480
Bye, feel better.
1105
01:15:54,637 --> 01:15:55,812
Are you insane?
1106
01:15:57,248 --> 01:15:58,510
Come out, whore.
1107
01:15:58,554 --> 01:16:01,992
♪ I'm just a-sittin' with the
bad kitty ♪
1108
01:16:02,035 --> 01:16:04,211
♪ Just while it's in the mood
1109
01:16:04,255 --> 01:16:05,778
This is weird.
1110
01:16:05,822 --> 01:16:07,824
Think of it as prom that smellsfunny.
1111
01:16:08,694 --> 01:16:09,782
I look ridiculous.
1112
01:16:10,653 --> 01:16:12,524
Cataracts will help with that, Ithink.
1113
01:16:12,568 --> 01:16:15,527
There's so many old people
here, the average age is dead.
1114
01:16:16,746 --> 01:16:17,573
Ladies.
1115
01:16:26,320 --> 01:16:27,887
Suck it, bitch.
1116
01:16:29,106 --> 01:16:31,238
♪ And I wanna kiss you too
1117
01:16:31,282 --> 01:16:33,153
So it's your birthday, huh?
1118
01:16:33,197 --> 01:16:34,764
Yes, ma'am.
1119
01:16:34,807 --> 01:16:38,071
I am 92 years old.
1120
01:16:38,115 --> 01:16:39,595
92?
1121
01:16:39,638 --> 01:16:40,770
You rock, dude.
1122
01:16:40,813 --> 01:16:41,901
Happy birthday.
1123
01:16:43,686 --> 01:16:46,210
So I hear there's a lot ofaction going on in these places,
1124
01:16:46,253 --> 01:16:48,255
everyone being single and all.
1125
01:16:48,299 --> 01:16:50,431
You're not gonna give me an STD,are you?
1126
01:16:50,475 --> 01:16:51,563
Oh, I'm 92.
1127
01:16:53,434 --> 01:16:55,480
Leave room for Jesus there, hotpants.
1128
01:16:55,523 --> 01:16:56,829
Uh, jealous much?
72463
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