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1
00:00:11,412 --> 00:00:13,345
THAT WAS FUN. WHAT A GREAT IDEA
2
00:00:13,381 --> 00:00:16,382
TO MAKE A SNOWMAN
INTO MY LIKENESS.
3
00:00:16,417 --> 00:00:18,661
I'M SURPRISED IT DIDN'T MELT.
4
00:00:18,685 --> 00:00:21,153
YOU'RE SO HOT. HA HA HA.
5
00:00:21,188 --> 00:00:23,355
HEY! COOL. CHECK IT OUT.
6
00:00:23,391 --> 00:00:25,724
THE CREATOR OF CAPTAIN
KARMA IS GOING TO BE
7
00:00:25,759 --> 00:00:27,893
AT PEE WEE'S COMICS.
YOU WANT TO COME?
8
00:00:27,928 --> 00:00:32,164
I THINK I'LL SKIP THE
FUNNY BOOK CARNIVAL.
9
00:00:32,199 --> 00:00:33,598
OH! I'M LATE.
10
00:00:33,634 --> 00:00:36,235
IT'S HOKEY-POKEY DAY AT
MY ROLLER SKATING CLASS.
11
00:00:36,270 --> 00:00:38,348
OH, DO YOU WANT TO COME?
12
00:00:38,372 --> 00:00:40,183
NO, THE LAST TIME I
PUT MY WHOLE SELF IN,
13
00:00:40,207 --> 00:00:42,841
I-I GOT IN A LOT OF TROUBLE.
14
00:00:42,876 --> 00:00:44,187
YOU'RE MAKING FUN OF ME.
15
00:00:44,211 --> 00:00:45,944
NO. OH, MY GOD, NO. I'M NOT.
16
00:00:45,979 --> 00:00:47,913
I LOVE HOW UNIQUE
YOU ARE, YOU KNOW?
17
00:00:47,948 --> 00:00:49,415
YOU'RE... YOU'RE ONE OF A KIND.
18
00:00:49,450 --> 00:00:50,916
YOU ARE LIKE...
19
00:00:50,951 --> 00:00:53,419
YOU ARE LIKE MY
OWN LITTLE DODO BIRD.
20
00:00:53,454 --> 00:00:55,587
OH.
21
00:00:55,622 --> 00:00:59,658
I AM SO, SO HAPPY
THAT YOU ARE IN MY LIFE.
22
00:00:59,693 --> 00:01:02,761
OH, WELL, I AM, TOO, SIR.
23
00:01:02,796 --> 00:01:05,097
IRENE... YEAH?
24
00:01:05,132 --> 00:01:06,532
I, UH...
25
00:01:06,567 --> 00:01:09,935
BE CAREFUL WHEN
YOU SHAKE IT ALL ABOUT.
26
00:01:09,970 --> 00:01:11,303
THAT'S SWEET.
27
00:01:11,338 --> 00:01:12,504
IRENE? YEAH?
28
00:01:12,540 --> 00:01:13,872
I LOVE YOU.
29
00:01:13,907 --> 00:01:16,608
HA HA HA. THAT'S SWEET.
30
00:01:39,867 --> 00:01:41,599
HEY. HEY.
31
00:01:41,635 --> 00:01:44,435
HEY, HEY, BERG, TELL ME AGAIN,
32
00:01:44,471 --> 00:01:48,173
WHAT TRIMESTER ARE YOU IN?
33
00:01:48,208 --> 00:01:49,507
OOH.
34
00:01:49,543 --> 00:01:52,110
I TOLD IRENE THAT I LOVED HER.
35
00:01:52,146 --> 00:01:54,412
WHOA, REALLY?
36
00:01:54,447 --> 00:01:56,948
WOW, WOW. I-I'M SHOCKED.
37
00:01:56,984 --> 00:01:58,550
I MEAN, I'M HAPPY FOR YOU...
38
00:01:58,585 --> 00:02:02,187
NO, NOT YET. I'M STILL SHOCKED.
39
00:02:02,222 --> 00:02:08,359
YEAH, WELL, UH, SHE
DIDN'T SAY IT BACK.
40
00:02:08,395 --> 00:02:10,896
OH, NO, NO, SHE
PROBABLY DIDN'T HEAR YOU.
41
00:02:10,931 --> 00:02:13,799
THAT'S HAPPENED TO ME BEFORE.
42
00:02:13,834 --> 00:02:15,200
PETE,
43
00:02:15,235 --> 00:02:17,769
THIS IS THE FIRST TIME
THAT I SAID IT FIRST,
44
00:02:17,805 --> 00:02:21,306
AND THE FIRST TIME I
MEANT IT, I MIGHT ADD.
45
00:02:21,341 --> 00:02:23,208
YEAH, THAT'S NICE.
46
00:02:23,243 --> 00:02:24,776
DO I NEED TO TELL YOU
47
00:02:24,812 --> 00:02:26,945
WHAT ICE CREAM DOES TO CHENILLE?
48
00:02:26,980 --> 00:02:30,381
JEEZ, I TOLD HER I LOVED HER...
49
00:02:30,417 --> 00:02:34,619
AND SHE LAUGHED.
50
00:02:34,654 --> 00:02:38,523
I DIDN'T EVEN GET A "DITTO."
51
00:02:38,558 --> 00:02:40,125
ALL RIGHT, YOU KNOW WHAT?
52
00:02:40,160 --> 00:02:42,060
THE FIRST THING
YOU NEED TO DO IS
53
00:02:42,096 --> 00:02:45,663
STOP WATCHING "GHOST."
54
00:02:45,699 --> 00:02:50,368
YEAH. I KNOW, BUT, UH...
55
00:02:50,403 --> 00:02:52,637
SOMETIMES YOU JUST
NEED A GOOD CRY.
56
00:02:52,672 --> 00:02:56,074
ALL RIGHT, NO, NO.
57
00:02:56,110 --> 00:02:58,777
LOOK, GIVE IRENE SOME
TIME. SHE'LL COME AROUND.
58
00:02:58,812 --> 00:02:59,845
YOU THINK?
59
00:02:59,880 --> 00:03:01,346
YEAH. YEAH, BUT MEANWHILE,
60
00:03:01,381 --> 00:03:04,015
LOOK, DON'T SIT HERE
WALLOWING IN SELF-PITY.
61
00:03:04,051 --> 00:03:06,417
YOU KNOW, GO...
GO FIND YOUR SMILE.
62
00:03:06,453 --> 00:03:08,754
HEY, LOOK, LOOK.
CAPTAIN KARMA'S IN TOWN.
63
00:03:08,789 --> 00:03:12,190
GO SEE HIM. YOU LIKE HIM.
64
00:03:12,226 --> 00:03:16,461
I DO LOVE CAPTAIN KARMA.
65
00:03:16,496 --> 00:03:18,463
LOOK,
66
00:03:18,498 --> 00:03:21,399
ALL HIS SUPERHERO
FRIENDS WILL BE THERE.
67
00:03:21,434 --> 00:03:24,936
HUH? SO, YOU KNOW,
GO ENJOY YOURSELF
68
00:03:24,972 --> 00:03:27,239
AND DON'T THINK ABOUT IRENE.
69
00:03:27,274 --> 00:03:28,952
YOU KNOW WHAT?
YOU'RE RIGHT, PETE.
70
00:03:28,976 --> 00:03:31,743
YOU ARE RIGHT.
71
00:03:31,779 --> 00:03:35,847
HEY... YOU'RE A GOOD FRIEND.
72
00:03:35,883 --> 00:03:38,216
DITTO.
73
00:03:42,689 --> 00:03:46,258
YOU'RE THE COOLEST,
CAPTAIN KARMA.
74
00:03:46,293 --> 00:03:48,459
THANK YOU.
75
00:03:52,966 --> 00:03:56,034
OH, MY GOD. I KNOW YOU.
76
00:03:56,070 --> 00:03:57,835
YOU'RE MIKEY BERGEN.
77
00:03:57,871 --> 00:04:02,741
AND YOU'RE... S-SOMEONE
WHO KNOWS ME.
78
00:04:02,776 --> 00:04:04,243
I'M KATIE CONNER.
79
00:04:04,278 --> 00:04:05,977
WE WENT TO HIGH SCHOOL TOGETHER.
80
00:04:06,012 --> 00:04:07,412
UH, NO, NO, WE DIDN'T.
81
00:04:07,448 --> 00:04:09,147
IF THERE WERE GIRLS
WHO LOOKED LIKE YOU
82
00:04:09,182 --> 00:04:10,694
IN HIGH SCHOOL, WE
WOULDN'T HAVE HAD TO
83
00:04:10,718 --> 00:04:12,951
TURN OUT THE
LIGHTS AT THE DANCES.
84
00:04:12,986 --> 00:04:14,997
WELL, I DO LOOK A
LITTLE DIFFERENT NOW.
85
00:04:15,021 --> 00:04:17,789
I WAS 4 INCHES SHORTER
AND ABOUT 50 POUNDS HEAVIER.
86
00:04:17,824 --> 00:04:19,023
REMEMBER?
87
00:04:19,059 --> 00:04:21,393
OH, AND I HAD A LAZY EYE
88
00:04:21,428 --> 00:04:23,962
AND I USED TO WEARA PATCH.
89
00:04:23,997 --> 00:04:26,331
EVERYBODY CALLED ME "PATCHES."
90
00:04:26,367 --> 00:04:32,638
RIGHT, RIGHT, AND I
HAD SCURVY AND A HUMP.
91
00:04:32,673 --> 00:04:34,273
YEAH.
92
00:04:34,308 --> 00:04:35,785
WELL, I GUESS YOU
WOULDN'T REMEMBER ME.
93
00:04:35,809 --> 00:04:39,144
I MEAN, YOU WERE A SENIOR
AND I WAS A GEEKY FRESHMAN.
94
00:04:39,179 --> 00:04:41,280
BECAUSE OF YOU, I WENT TO SEE
95
00:04:41,315 --> 00:04:43,482
EVERY PERFORMANCE OF "OKLAHOMA!"
96
00:04:43,517 --> 00:04:44,583
OH, WELL, YEAH,
97
00:04:44,618 --> 00:04:46,818
I-I WAS SUPPOSED TO BE
A RANCHER, BUT THEY...
98
00:04:46,853 --> 00:04:52,658
THEY NEEDED ANOTHER
COWGIRL FOR THE DANCE.
99
00:04:52,693 --> 00:04:54,404
I CAN'T BELIEVE I RAN INTO YOU
100
00:04:54,428 --> 00:04:55,994
AFTER ALL THESE YEARS.
101
00:04:56,029 --> 00:04:57,996
IT'S LIKE DESTINY OR SOMETHING.
102
00:04:58,031 --> 00:04:59,643
DESTINY... THAT'S...
THAT'S THE NAME
103
00:04:59,667 --> 00:05:01,132
OF CAPTAIN KARMA'S
ROBOTIC HORSE.
104
00:05:01,168 --> 00:05:03,201
RIDE, DESTINY, RIDE!
105
00:05:08,208 --> 00:05:11,710
WHAT A BUNCH OF GEEKS.
106
00:05:14,014 --> 00:05:15,158
HERE'S ONE PERFECT
107
00:05:15,182 --> 00:05:16,493
FOR A COUPLE
FIREFIGHTERS LIKE US...
108
00:05:16,517 --> 00:05:18,383
"THE BOYS OF FIRE ISLAND."
109
00:05:18,419 --> 00:05:20,452
JOHN... JOHNNY, I-I...
110
00:05:20,487 --> 00:05:21,853
IT GOT TWO THUMBS UP.
111
00:05:21,888 --> 00:05:25,056
YEAH, UM, THOSE AREN'T THUMBS.
112
00:05:29,330 --> 00:05:30,873
OH, JOHNNY, THANK
GOD YOU'RE WEARING
113
00:05:30,897 --> 00:05:32,397
YOUR BIG BOY PANTS.
114
00:05:32,433 --> 00:05:33,832
OKAY, TURN AROUND.
115
00:05:33,867 --> 00:05:35,400
WHAT?
116
00:05:35,436 --> 00:05:37,280
GREAT NEWS. WE'RE GOING
TO A BUSINESS MIXER TONIGHT.
117
00:05:37,304 --> 00:05:39,304
I DON'T WANT TO GO
TO A BUSINESS MIXER.
118
00:05:39,340 --> 00:05:42,207
OH, OH, I'M SORRY. I
MEANT "FREE BOOZE."
119
00:05:42,242 --> 00:05:44,676
I CAN'T. I'M GOING TO
THE MOVIES WITH PETE.
120
00:05:44,712 --> 00:05:46,623
OH, THAT SOUNDS LIKE FUN.
WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO SEE?
121
00:05:46,647 --> 00:05:49,180
NOT GAY PORN.
122
00:05:49,216 --> 00:05:51,616
NO, SERIOUSLY, SWEETIE.
I CAN'T GO TO THIS THING.
123
00:05:51,652 --> 00:05:53,352
I AM GOING TO THE
MOVIES WITH PETE.
124
00:05:53,387 --> 00:05:55,031
I KNOW. SOUNDS FUN.
TUCK IN YOUR SHIRT.
125
00:05:55,055 --> 00:05:56,455
I'M NOT KIDDING.
126
00:05:56,490 --> 00:05:58,923
I KNOW, BABY. I KNOW
WHEN YOU'RE KIDDING.
127
00:05:58,959 --> 00:06:00,925
LIFT UP YOUR ARMS.
128
00:06:00,961 --> 00:06:03,127
SHARON, YOU CAN'T
JUST COME IN HERE
129
00:06:03,163 --> 00:06:04,730
AND CHANGE HIS PLANS.
130
00:06:04,765 --> 00:06:07,833
PETE, I WOULDN'T DREAM
OF IT. PUT YOUR ARMS DOWN.
131
00:06:07,868 --> 00:06:09,746
I THINK IT'S GREAT THAT
YOU GUYS ARE HANGING OUT.
132
00:06:09,770 --> 00:06:11,080
OKAY. GOOD NIGHT, PETE.
133
00:06:11,104 --> 00:06:13,505
YOU GUYS HAVE FUN AT THE MOVIES.
134
00:06:21,815 --> 00:06:24,683
HI, PETE.
135
00:06:26,387 --> 00:06:28,754
HEY!
136
00:06:28,789 --> 00:06:32,123
HEY, ASHLEY, I DIDN'T
SEE YOU THERE.
137
00:06:32,158 --> 00:06:34,659
SO, IT'S FRIDAY NIGHT.
DO YOU HAVE PLANS,
138
00:06:34,695 --> 00:06:37,629
OR DO YOU WANT TO BORROW
MY HOME FACIAL KIT AGAIN?
139
00:06:37,664 --> 00:06:39,364
I HAVE A DATE TONIGHT.
140
00:06:39,400 --> 00:06:42,267
OH. I HAVE A DATE, TOO.
141
00:06:42,302 --> 00:06:44,235
OH, WELL, THEN, I'LL
LET YOU GET READY.
142
00:06:44,271 --> 00:06:46,137
I'M SURE YOU WANT
TO SHED YOUR SKIN.
143
00:06:46,172 --> 00:06:48,774
WELL, YOU HAVE A GOOD TIME.
144
00:06:48,809 --> 00:06:51,743
OH, AND DON'T FORGET
TO TIP YOUR DATE.
145
00:06:51,779 --> 00:06:53,111
YOU KNOW WHAT?
146
00:06:53,146 --> 00:06:55,747
IT MIGHT INTEREST YOU TO KNOW
147
00:06:55,783 --> 00:06:58,950
THAT MY DATE IS, IN
FACT, NOT A HOOKER.
148
00:06:58,985 --> 00:07:02,854
SHE HAPPENS TO BE A RHODES
SCHOLAR/NYMPHOMANIAC.
149
00:07:02,890 --> 00:07:04,088
GREAT.
150
00:07:04,124 --> 00:07:06,691
THEN SHE'LL BE BORED
AND FRUSTRATED.
151
00:07:16,202 --> 00:07:18,236
SWEETIE, SWEETIE,
SWEETIE, STOP FIDGETING.
152
00:07:18,271 --> 00:07:19,315
I DON'T KNOW WHAT
I'M DOING HERE.
153
00:07:19,339 --> 00:07:20,439
OKAY, YOU KNOW WHAT?
154
00:07:20,474 --> 00:07:22,441
IF WE'RE GOING TO LOOK
LIKE A REAL LAW FIRM,
155
00:07:22,476 --> 00:07:24,375
WE'RE GOING TO NEED
MORE THAN ONE LAWYER,
156
00:07:24,411 --> 00:07:26,277
SO FOR TONIGHT, YOU'RE
THE SILENT PARTNER.
157
00:07:26,313 --> 00:07:27,479
BUT I'M NOT A LAWYER.
158
00:07:27,514 --> 00:07:30,515
SILENT!
159
00:07:30,551 --> 00:07:33,585
OH, OKAY. THERE'S MARK.
160
00:07:33,620 --> 00:07:35,465
HI. I WANT YOU TO MEET
MY HUSBAND JOHNNY.
161
00:07:35,489 --> 00:07:37,099
IT'S GOOD TO KNOW YOU.
162
00:07:37,123 --> 00:07:38,089
YOU, TOO.
163
00:07:38,124 --> 00:07:39,758
YOU LOOK NICE.
164
00:07:39,793 --> 00:07:41,170
SEE, I TOLD YOU THIS
WASN'T GOING TO BE SO BAD.
165
00:07:41,194 --> 00:07:43,528
I'D RATHER BE ON
A FUN SHIP CRUISE
166
00:07:43,564 --> 00:07:45,997
WITH MY EX-WIFE AND HER MOTHER.
167
00:07:46,032 --> 00:07:48,500
AND I'D RATHER BE WORKING
FOR A PRESTIGIOUS LAWYER.
168
00:07:48,535 --> 00:07:49,979
HA HA. SO START MINGLING.
169
00:07:50,003 --> 00:07:52,014
OKAY, HERE ARE
SOME BUSINESS CARDS.
170
00:07:52,038 --> 00:07:53,304
WHOA! BUSINESS CARDS.
171
00:07:53,340 --> 00:07:55,580
I ALWAYS WANTED TO
HAVE BUSINESS CARDS.
172
00:07:55,609 --> 00:07:58,176
OKAY, SO I WANT YOU TO
GIVE EVERY ONE OF THOSE
173
00:07:58,211 --> 00:08:00,111
TO A PROSPECTIVE CLIENT TONIGHT.
174
00:08:00,146 --> 00:08:02,981
HERE YOU GO, SHARON.
175
00:08:03,016 --> 00:08:05,416
UM, I'M GOING TO
WORK THE BUFFET LINE.
176
00:08:05,452 --> 00:08:08,687
YOU COVER THESE TABLES.
JOHNNY, YOU WANT TO COME?
177
00:08:08,722 --> 00:08:11,490
WITH YOU NOW, OR HERE AT ALL?
178
00:08:11,525 --> 00:08:12,958
GO GET 'EM, TIGER.
179
00:08:12,993 --> 00:08:14,337
BOY, YOUR WIFE HAS A WAY
OF GETTING WHAT SHE WANTS,
180
00:08:14,361 --> 00:08:15,361
DOESN'T SHE?
181
00:08:15,395 --> 00:08:16,828
YEAH, I THINK SO,
182
00:08:16,864 --> 00:08:19,731
BUT I SHOULD REALLY
CHECK WITH HER.
183
00:08:19,766 --> 00:08:20,944
LET ME BUY YOU A DRINK.
184
00:08:20,968 --> 00:08:22,734
MY WIFE SAID THEY WERE FREE.
185
00:08:22,769 --> 00:08:24,689
WHY DO YOU THINK I'M BUYING?
186
00:08:34,381 --> 00:08:38,216
WHY DID WE RENT THIS?
187
00:08:38,251 --> 00:08:42,220
WE SHOULD JUST BUY IT.
188
00:08:42,255 --> 00:08:44,322
HEY, PETE.
189
00:08:44,357 --> 00:08:47,826
OH, WHAT IS IT NOW?
190
00:08:47,861 --> 00:08:49,861
DOES THIS, UH...
191
00:08:49,897 --> 00:08:52,831
DOES THIS LOOK LIKE A
FOUR OR A NINE TO YOU?
192
00:08:52,866 --> 00:08:58,069
LOOKS LIKE A... WHAT?
193
00:08:58,104 --> 00:09:02,106
THAT JUGHEAD... HE CAN'T
EAT THAT MANY BURGERS.
194
00:09:04,044 --> 00:09:06,011
IT'S A FOUR, AND WHO'S KATIE?
195
00:09:06,046 --> 00:09:09,147
SHE'S A CUTE GIRL I RAN INTO
AT THE COMIC BOOK STORE.
196
00:09:09,182 --> 00:09:12,984
BERG... HOW OLD IS SHE?
197
00:09:15,522 --> 00:09:19,024
WE USED TO GO TO
HIGH SCHOOL TOGETHER,
198
00:09:19,059 --> 00:09:21,660
AND, MAN, HAS SHE CHANGED.
199
00:09:21,695 --> 00:09:25,730
BEST-LOOKING ONE-EYED
FAT GIRL I'VE EVER SEEN.
200
00:09:25,766 --> 00:09:27,966
WHAT ABOUT IRENE?
I KNOW SHE'S A KOOK,
201
00:09:28,001 --> 00:09:30,234
BUT SHE'S GOT TO GIVE
THE CHUBBY CYCLOPS
202
00:09:30,270 --> 00:09:31,502
A RUN FOR HER MONEY.
203
00:09:31,538 --> 00:09:33,605
MEETING KATIE WAS DESTINY.
204
00:09:33,640 --> 00:09:35,473
WHAT ARE YOU
DOING? BERG, NO, NO.
205
00:09:35,508 --> 00:09:37,609
IT WASN'T DESTINY.
IT WAS A COINCIDENCE.
206
00:09:37,644 --> 00:09:40,045
YOU JUST... YOU BUMPED
INTO THE GIRL ONCE.
207
00:09:40,080 --> 00:09:42,213
NO, NO, I BUMPED INTO
HER ON THE SAME DAY
208
00:09:42,248 --> 00:09:44,649
MY GIRLFRIEND, MORE OR
LESS, SAID SHE HATES ME.
209
00:09:44,685 --> 00:09:47,752
PETE, SEE, I THINK EVERYTHING
IN LIFE HAPPENS FOR A REASON.
210
00:09:47,788 --> 00:09:49,955
YOU KNOW, KATIE WAS
PUT THERE TO SHOW ME
211
00:09:49,990 --> 00:09:52,256
THAT THERE'S SOMEONE ELSE
OUT THERE BETTER FOR ME.
212
00:09:52,292 --> 00:09:53,458
I KNOW IT.
213
00:09:53,493 --> 00:09:54,637
I KNOW YOU'RE HURT, OKAY?
214
00:09:54,661 --> 00:09:55,872
AND I KNOW THIS GIRL
215
00:09:55,896 --> 00:09:57,740
PROBABLY MAKES YOU FEEL
BETTER ABOUT YOURSELF,
216
00:09:57,764 --> 00:09:59,475
BUT DON'T USE DESTINY
AS SOME EXCUSE
217
00:09:59,499 --> 00:10:01,210
TO BAIL ON YOUR
RELATIONSHIP WITH IRENE.
218
00:10:01,234 --> 00:10:05,169
OH, YOU'RE RIGHT.
219
00:10:05,205 --> 00:10:07,171
YOU'RE RIGHT.
WHAT AM I THINKING?
220
00:10:07,207 --> 00:10:08,607
THERE YOU GO.
221
00:10:08,642 --> 00:10:09,941
YOU KNOW WHAT?
222
00:10:09,977 --> 00:10:11,688
I'M GOING TO GO TALK
THIS THROUGH WITH IRENE
223
00:10:11,712 --> 00:10:13,712
RIGHT AFTER MY
SHIFT AT THE HOSPITAL.
224
00:10:13,747 --> 00:10:16,180
MAYBE STOP BY RECOVERY,
STEAL SOME FLOWERS.
225
00:10:16,216 --> 00:10:19,317
BERG, COME ON. THAT'S NOT NICE.
226
00:10:19,352 --> 00:10:22,654
TAKE IT FROM A GUY IN A
COMA. HE'LL NEVER KNOW.
227
00:10:29,262 --> 00:10:33,163
OKAY, BEFORE I GO... AW...
228
00:10:33,199 --> 00:10:35,933
BEFORE I GO, I WANT
YOU TO KEEP HIM
229
00:10:35,968 --> 00:10:39,504
ON AN I.V. DRIP AT
200 C.C.s, AND, UH...
230
00:10:39,539 --> 00:10:41,873
GIVE YOURSELF 50 C.C.s.
231
00:10:44,577 --> 00:10:47,244
YOU KNOW, THIS WHEELCHAIR
IS REALLY UNNECESSARY.
232
00:10:47,280 --> 00:10:49,647
I JUST JAMMED MY FINGER
PLAYING BASKETBALL.
233
00:10:49,682 --> 00:10:50,682
OH, YOU KNOW,
234
00:10:50,717 --> 00:10:52,617
I PLAYED BALL WHEN
I WAS IN COLLEGE.
235
00:10:52,652 --> 00:10:55,152
COULD HAVE GONE PRO,
BUT I LOST MY GYM BAG.
236
00:10:55,187 --> 00:10:58,088
OH, MY GOD. BERG?
237
00:10:58,124 --> 00:11:01,626
KATIE, HI! WHAT... ARE YOU OKAY?
238
00:11:01,661 --> 00:11:04,261
OH, YEAH. I JUST DOVE
FOR A LOOSE BALL,
239
00:11:04,297 --> 00:11:05,996
AND I JAMMED MY FINGER.
240
00:11:06,032 --> 00:11:07,943
SEE, THAT'S WHY I DON'T GOLF.
241
00:11:07,967 --> 00:11:10,601
I THINK I CAN TAKE IT
FROM HERE. THANK YOU.
242
00:11:10,637 --> 00:11:14,739
HO-HO. I WAS
TOTALLY DOC BLOCKED.
243
00:11:14,774 --> 00:11:17,575
LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT THAT.
244
00:11:17,610 --> 00:11:19,777
WOW. I HAD NO IDEA
YOU WERE A DOCTOR.
245
00:11:19,813 --> 00:11:21,412
YOU KNOW, I ALWAYS THOUGHT
246
00:11:21,448 --> 00:11:23,815
YOU'D DO SOMETHING
WITH YOUR A.V. SKILLS.
247
00:11:23,850 --> 00:11:26,851
WELL, I DO ACTUALLY RUN
248
00:11:26,886 --> 00:11:28,798
MOST OF THE OVERHEAD PROJECTORS
249
00:11:28,822 --> 00:11:31,388
HERE AT THE HOSPITAL.
250
00:11:31,424 --> 00:11:33,602
SEE, YOU'VE... YOU'VE
REALLY JAMMED THIS.
251
00:11:33,626 --> 00:11:34,904
ARE YOU READY?
252
00:11:34,928 --> 00:11:35,938
HUH? OKAY.
253
00:11:35,962 --> 00:11:37,072
YAAH!
254
00:11:37,096 --> 00:11:38,429
HOW'S THAT FEEL?
255
00:11:38,465 --> 00:11:39,931
OH, IT'S MUCH BETTER.
256
00:11:39,966 --> 00:11:40,932
THANKS.
257
00:11:40,967 --> 00:11:44,902
YEAH, WELL... NOW
YOU PULL MY FINGER.
258
00:11:47,507 --> 00:11:48,739
I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS.
259
00:11:48,775 --> 00:11:50,708
I HAVEN'T SEEN
YOU IN EIGHT YEARS,
260
00:11:50,743 --> 00:11:53,110
AND THEN I RUN INTO
YOU TWICE IN ONE DAY?
261
00:11:53,145 --> 00:11:56,313
THAT... THAT IS QUITE
A COINCIDENCE, YEAH.
262
00:11:56,349 --> 00:11:57,726
NO, I DON'T BELIEVE
IN COINCIDENCE.
263
00:11:57,750 --> 00:11:59,584
I BELIEVE EVERYTHING
HAPPENS FOR A REASON.
264
00:11:59,619 --> 00:12:04,889
WELL, SO DO I!
265
00:12:04,924 --> 00:12:06,891
SO DO I.
266
00:12:08,361 --> 00:12:09,861
YEAH, WELL, UM...
267
00:12:09,896 --> 00:12:12,864
UH, KEEP ICE ON THAT UNTIL
THE SWELLING GOES DOWN
268
00:12:12,899 --> 00:12:14,431
AND THAT SHOULD BE FINE.
269
00:12:14,467 --> 00:12:15,666
OKAY.
270
00:12:15,702 --> 00:12:17,346
WELL, IT WAS NICE
BUMPING INTO YOU AGAIN.
271
00:12:17,370 --> 00:12:20,571
YEAH, YEAH.
272
00:12:20,607 --> 00:12:27,244
OH, BY THE WAY,
BERG, I STAYED COOL.
273
00:12:27,279 --> 00:12:30,815
EXCUSE ME?
274
00:12:30,850 --> 00:12:33,885
IN MY YEARBOOK, YOU SAID
THAT I SHOULD STAY COOL,
275
00:12:33,920 --> 00:12:36,186
SO I DID.
276
00:12:40,393 --> 00:12:43,628
I, UH, CAN'T BELIEVE THAT
YOU REMEMBERED THAT.
277
00:12:43,663 --> 00:12:45,129
ARE YOU KIDDING?
278
00:12:45,164 --> 00:12:48,699
I HAD ONE EYE AND A
PITUITARY DYSFUNCTION.
279
00:12:48,735 --> 00:12:51,802
PEOPLE WEREN'T LINING
UP TO SIGN MY BOOK.
280
00:12:51,838 --> 00:12:56,306
OH, YOU'RE PATCHES!
281
00:13:00,079 --> 00:13:05,850
OH, I THOUGHT YOU WERE A BOY!
282
00:13:05,885 --> 00:13:08,686
YEAH, YOU WEREN'T THE ONLY ONE.
283
00:13:08,721 --> 00:13:12,023
THE PROM QUEEN
ASKED ME TO THE DANCE.
284
00:13:12,058 --> 00:13:14,158
WELL, GOD, I...
285
00:13:14,193 --> 00:13:17,494
I WISH... I WISH I ASKED
YOU TO THE DANCE.
286
00:13:19,198 --> 00:13:24,234
WHY... WHY ARE YOU
LOOKING AT ME LIKE THAT?
287
00:13:24,270 --> 00:13:25,636
I DON'T KNOW.
288
00:13:25,672 --> 00:13:29,473
YOU KNOW, YOU'RE
JUST KIND OF SPECIAL.
289
00:13:31,510 --> 00:13:36,447
RIDE, DESTINY, RIDE.
290
00:13:40,053 --> 00:13:41,151
Ashley: PETE?
291
00:13:41,187 --> 00:13:44,221
PETE?
292
00:13:44,256 --> 00:13:45,790
HEY!
293
00:13:45,825 --> 00:13:47,491
HEY, WHAT A COINCIDENCE.
294
00:13:47,526 --> 00:13:49,493
I WAS JUST HIDING FROM YOU.
295
00:13:49,528 --> 00:13:52,463
MOVE, MOVE, MOVE, MOVE, MOVE.
296
00:13:52,498 --> 00:13:56,467
IT'S OKAY. I'M A DOCTOR.
297
00:13:56,502 --> 00:13:58,013
SO WHAT HAPPENED
TO YOUR BIG EVENING?
298
00:13:58,037 --> 00:14:01,038
SAME THING THAT HAPPENED
TO YOUR IMAGINARY DATE.
299
00:14:01,074 --> 00:14:04,475
I AM NOT THAT PATHETIC.
SHE'S PARKING THE CAR.
300
00:14:04,510 --> 00:14:10,014
WOW. YOU LET HER DRIVE
THE IMAGINARY PORSCHE?
301
00:14:10,049 --> 00:14:12,061
ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT.
LET'S JUST ADMIT IT.
302
00:14:12,085 --> 00:14:13,183
FINE.
303
00:14:13,219 --> 00:14:14,529
I REALLY DIDN'T HAVE A DATE.
304
00:14:14,553 --> 00:14:16,198
ALL RIGHT. MY DATE CANCELED.
305
00:14:16,222 --> 00:14:18,622
SHE'S UNDERWEAR SHOPPING
FOR OUR DATE TOMORROW NIGHT.
306
00:14:21,227 --> 00:14:23,427
SO WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO SEE?
307
00:14:23,462 --> 00:14:26,463
OH, I WANTED TO SEE
THAT UKRANIAN FILM,
308
00:14:26,499 --> 00:14:27,898
BUT IT'S SOLD OUT.
309
00:14:27,934 --> 00:14:30,567
MAN, HOW SMALL
CAN THAT THEATER BE?
310
00:14:30,603 --> 00:14:32,970
SO WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO SEE?
311
00:14:33,006 --> 00:14:36,473
WELL, THE ONLY THING LEFT
IS THAT ROMANTIC COMEDY,
312
00:14:36,509 --> 00:14:38,809
BUT I HATE ROMANTIC COMEDIES.
313
00:14:38,845 --> 00:14:41,378
WHY? YOUR WHOLE
LOVE LIFE'S A JOKE.
314
00:14:43,916 --> 00:14:44,949
WHAT?
315
00:14:44,984 --> 00:14:46,951
I CAN READ THE MARQUEE BACKWARDS
316
00:14:46,986 --> 00:14:48,719
IN YOUR OILY FOREHEAD.
317
00:14:48,755 --> 00:14:51,956
HEY, WHAT'S THAT
ROMANTIC COMEDY ABOUT?
318
00:14:51,991 --> 00:14:53,724
IT'S ABOUT TWO PEOPLE
319
00:14:53,760 --> 00:14:55,838
WHO HATE EACH
OTHER FOR TWO HOURS.
320
00:14:55,862 --> 00:14:57,606
THEN THEY WIND UP DOING IT.
321
00:14:57,630 --> 00:14:58,595
GOD.
322
00:14:58,631 --> 00:15:00,564
WHO WRITES THIS CRAP?
323
00:15:00,599 --> 00:15:03,167
Both: ONE, PLEASE.
324
00:15:03,202 --> 00:15:04,301
ALL RIGHT, THAT'S IT.
325
00:15:04,336 --> 00:15:05,814
I HANDED OUT ALL
MY BUSINESS CARDS.
326
00:15:05,838 --> 00:15:07,016
YEAH, ME, TOO.
327
00:15:07,040 --> 00:15:09,506
YOU KNOW, IF EVEN A
SINGLE PERSON CALLS,
328
00:15:09,542 --> 00:15:11,375
THEN THIS NIGHT WAS A SUCCESS.
329
00:15:11,410 --> 00:15:12,576
HA HA.
330
00:15:12,611 --> 00:15:15,245
JOHNNY, SWEETIE, WHAT'S
THAT IN YOUR POCKET?
331
00:15:15,281 --> 00:15:17,126
HONEY, I DON'T THINK THAT GAME'S
332
00:15:17,150 --> 00:15:21,351
REALLY APPROPRIATE RIGHT NOW.
333
00:15:21,387 --> 00:15:22,653
OH, THOSE. YEAH.
334
00:15:22,689 --> 00:15:24,755
YEAH, MARK GAVE THEM TO ME.
335
00:15:24,791 --> 00:15:28,092
YEAH, SEE, WHENEVER I
SAVE SOMEONE FROM A FIRE,
336
00:15:28,127 --> 00:15:29,805
I'M GOING TO SLIP THEM
ONE OF YOUR CARDS
337
00:15:29,829 --> 00:15:31,106
WHILE THEY'RE STILL
STRAPPED TO THE STRETCHER
338
00:15:31,130 --> 00:15:32,462
AND HIGH ON OXYGEN.
339
00:15:32,498 --> 00:15:34,665
GOD, MARK, I HAD TO
JUMP THROUGH HOOPS
340
00:15:34,701 --> 00:15:36,934
TO GET US INVITED
TO THIS STUPID THING.
341
00:15:36,969 --> 00:15:39,670
SHARON, I CAN'T PRETEND
TO BE SOMEBODY I'M NOT.
342
00:15:39,706 --> 00:15:41,338
NEITHER CAN MY CLIENTS.
343
00:15:41,373 --> 00:15:43,574
YEAH, I DON'T EVEN KNOW
WHAT I WAS THINKING,
344
00:15:43,609 --> 00:15:44,775
INVITING YOU HERE.
345
00:15:44,811 --> 00:15:46,944
I GUESS I WAS JUST
TRYING TO CONVINCE YOU
346
00:15:46,979 --> 00:15:49,413
THAT YOU'RE A BETTER LAWYER
THAN YOU PRETEND TO BE,
347
00:15:49,448 --> 00:15:51,226
BUT, I MEAN, WHO AM I KIDDING?
348
00:15:51,250 --> 00:15:53,383
I CAN'T MAKE A DIFFERENCE.
349
00:15:53,419 --> 00:15:55,086
I'M SUCH A FAILURE.
350
00:15:55,121 --> 00:15:58,655
NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, SHARON.
YOU'RE NOT A FAILURE.
351
00:15:58,691 --> 00:16:02,326
YOU'RE A FAILURE'S ASSISTANT.
352
00:16:04,430 --> 00:16:06,931
ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT,
GIVE ME THE CARDS.
353
00:16:06,966 --> 00:16:08,365
I'LL DO IT.
354
00:16:08,400 --> 00:16:11,602
BABY... YES?
355
00:16:11,637 --> 00:16:13,971
ARE YOU FAKE CRYING?
356
00:16:14,006 --> 00:16:15,006
YES.
357
00:16:15,041 --> 00:16:17,174
ALL RIGHT!
358
00:16:17,210 --> 00:16:20,778
I'M FINALLY STARTING
TO PICK UP ON THAT.
359
00:16:20,813 --> 00:16:23,147
MAN, THAT MOVIE WAS BAD.
360
00:16:23,182 --> 00:16:26,016
GOOD CALL ON THE BEER RUN.
361
00:16:26,052 --> 00:16:28,585
THOSE EMPTIES
MAKE A LOT OF NOISE
362
00:16:28,621 --> 00:16:30,087
WHEN THEY ROLL
DOWN TO THE FRONT.
363
00:16:33,525 --> 00:16:36,894
YOU KNOW, I DON'T KNOW
WHETHER IT'S THE BEER TALKING
364
00:16:36,929 --> 00:16:42,800
OR THE KAHLUA OR
OR THE TEQUILA...
365
00:16:42,835 --> 00:16:44,813
BUT I HAD A GREAT TIME.
366
00:16:44,837 --> 00:16:46,871
YEAH, WELL, WHOEVER IT WAS,
367
00:16:46,906 --> 00:16:48,873
THEY SHOULD BRUSH THEIR TEETH.
368
00:16:53,312 --> 00:16:55,379
THAT'S FUNNY.
369
00:16:55,414 --> 00:16:56,747
YOU'RE FUNNY.
370
00:16:56,783 --> 00:16:59,817
I LIKE IT WHEN WE SAY
MEAN THINGS TO EACH OTHER.
371
00:16:59,852 --> 00:17:02,219
NO, NO, WAIT A MINUTE.
372
00:17:02,255 --> 00:17:05,790
I LIKE IT WHEN I SAY
MEAN THINGS TO YOU
373
00:17:05,825 --> 00:17:09,126
AND THEN YOU JUST
KIND OF STARE AT ME
374
00:17:09,162 --> 00:17:13,864
AND GO, "BIG WORDS MAKE MY
HEAD HURT SOMETHING FIERCE."
375
00:17:13,900 --> 00:17:18,836
ALL RIGHT, WELL... GOOD NIGHT.
376
00:17:18,871 --> 00:17:20,037
GOOD NIGHT.
377
00:17:20,072 --> 00:17:21,216
OH. OH.
378
00:17:21,240 --> 00:17:22,539
OH, I'M SORRY.
379
00:17:22,574 --> 00:17:25,176
ALL RIGHT, I'LL SEE
YOU LATER. GOODBYE.
380
00:17:25,211 --> 00:17:28,045
HEY, LET ME ASK YOU SOMETHING...
381
00:17:28,080 --> 00:17:31,615
DO YOU, UH... DO YOU
BELIEVE IN DESTINY?
382
00:17:31,650 --> 00:17:32,850
YEAH, I DO.
383
00:17:32,885 --> 00:17:35,786
I DIDN'T REALLY THINK
ABOUT IT UNTIL TONIGHT.
384
00:17:35,822 --> 00:17:38,989
YOU KNOW, I MEAN, LOOK...
LOOK AT WHAT HAPPENED.
385
00:17:39,025 --> 00:17:42,126
I MEAN, ALL WE TRY TO
DO IS AVOID ONE ANOTHER,
386
00:17:42,161 --> 00:17:44,461
YET TONIGHT,
DESPITE ALL THE LIES
387
00:17:44,496 --> 00:17:47,832
AND ALL THE DIFFERENT MOVIE
THEATERS TO CHOOSE FROM,
388
00:17:47,867 --> 00:17:49,233
WE WIND UP TOGETHER.
389
00:17:49,268 --> 00:17:51,635
AND YOU KNOW WHAT?
I HAD A GREAT TIME.
390
00:17:51,670 --> 00:17:54,205
I HAD A GREAT TIME
WITH YOU TONIGHT.
391
00:17:54,240 --> 00:17:58,775
HA HA.
392
00:17:58,811 --> 00:18:01,578
WHAT... WHAT'S SO FUNNY?
393
00:18:01,613 --> 00:18:04,114
IF YOU WERE ANYONE ELSE,
394
00:18:04,150 --> 00:18:06,951
I'D THINK YOU WERE
COMING ON TO ME.
395
00:18:06,986 --> 00:18:11,755
IF YOU WERE ANYBODY
ELSE, MAYBE I WOULD BE.
396
00:18:15,794 --> 00:18:17,027
HEY.
397
00:18:17,063 --> 00:18:18,462
GUESS WHAT.
398
00:18:18,497 --> 00:18:20,497
DESTINY STRIKES AGAIN.
399
00:18:20,532 --> 00:18:23,633
B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B!
400
00:18:28,241 --> 00:18:29,606
WHAT YOU GOT THERE?
401
00:18:29,641 --> 00:18:31,075
MY OLD YEARBOOK.
402
00:18:31,110 --> 00:18:32,709
OH, YOU'RE THINKING
403
00:18:32,745 --> 00:18:36,280
ABOUT CALLING YOUR
FRIENDS FROM FLAG CORPS?
404
00:18:36,315 --> 00:18:40,084
NO, WE'VE GROWN APART.
405
00:18:40,119 --> 00:18:42,264
I'M LOOKING AT WHAT THAT
GIRL KATIE WROTE. WHO?
406
00:18:42,288 --> 00:18:44,021
THE COMIC BOOK
GIRL. LISTEN TO THIS.
407
00:18:44,056 --> 00:18:47,157
"BERG..." I DOUBT
YOU'LL EVEN READ THIS,
408
00:18:47,193 --> 00:18:49,426
"BUT IF YOU DO, YOU SHOULD KNOW
409
00:18:49,461 --> 00:18:51,962
"THE ONLY THING I
LIKED ABOUT SCHOOL
410
00:18:51,998 --> 00:18:55,266
"WAS THE CHANCE THAT I
MIGHT SEE YOU AT LUNCH.
411
00:18:55,301 --> 00:18:58,102
"YOU'RE GOING TO LEAVE THESE
AWKWARD TEENAGE YEARS BEHIND
412
00:18:58,137 --> 00:19:00,104
"AND GO ON TO DO GREAT THINGS.
413
00:19:00,139 --> 00:19:02,739
"I ONLY WISH THAT I
COULD BE THERE TO SEE IT.
414
00:19:02,775 --> 00:19:05,342
"SEE YA. KATIE.
415
00:19:05,378 --> 00:19:10,080
P.S... SCHOOL'S A BUMMER.
HAVE A GREAT SUMMER."
416
00:19:10,116 --> 00:19:11,315
THAT'S IT.
417
00:19:11,350 --> 00:19:13,918
I'M CALLING HER.
418
00:19:13,953 --> 00:19:15,819
HEY, BERG!
419
00:19:15,854 --> 00:19:21,691
YOU WERE VERY
PRETTY IN "OKLAHOMA!"
420
00:19:21,727 --> 00:19:22,727
HEY, WHERE'D THAT...
421
00:19:22,761 --> 00:19:24,494
WHERE IS HER NUMBER?
I THREW IT IN HERE.
422
00:19:24,530 --> 00:19:25,840
DID YOU TAKE OUT THE TRASH?
423
00:19:25,864 --> 00:19:28,565
IT WAS ITS DESTINY.
424
00:19:35,207 --> 00:19:36,640
GOTCHA!
425
00:19:40,413 --> 00:19:41,778
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
426
00:19:41,814 --> 00:19:43,213
WE'RE OUT OF PLASTIC BAGS.
427
00:19:43,249 --> 00:19:45,327
DO I BOTHER YOU WHEN YOU'RE
GOING THROUGH THE TRASH?
428
00:19:45,351 --> 00:19:48,185
BERG, I WANT TO EXPLAIN
ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED EARLIER.
429
00:19:48,220 --> 00:19:50,587
OKAY, HOLD ON, LOOK,
DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT, OKAY?
430
00:19:50,622 --> 00:19:52,134
THERE'S NO NEED TO EXPLAIN.
431
00:19:52,158 --> 00:19:53,324
WELL, YES, THERE IS.
432
00:19:53,359 --> 00:19:56,126
LOOK, YOU TOLD ME YOU
LOVED ME, AND I FROZE.
433
00:19:56,162 --> 00:19:59,129
I GUESS WHEN YOU DREAM
ABOUT SOMETHING FOR SO LONG,
434
00:19:59,165 --> 00:20:01,999
AND THEN IT FINALLY HAPPENS,
435
00:20:02,034 --> 00:20:05,436
IT... IT TAKES YOUR BREATH AWAY.
436
00:20:06,705 --> 00:20:09,506
YOU KNOW, I HAD TO
CATCH MY BREATH, BERG.
437
00:20:11,743 --> 00:20:13,677
OKAY.
438
00:20:16,382 --> 00:20:19,183
AND IF I'D BEEN ABLE TO,
439
00:20:19,218 --> 00:20:21,485
WHAT I WOULD HAVE SAID IS...
440
00:20:21,520 --> 00:20:24,654
I LOVE YOU, TOO.
441
00:20:26,425 --> 00:20:31,228
I LOVE YOU, MICHAEL BERGEN.
442
00:20:31,263 --> 00:20:32,863
DITTO.
443
00:20:35,601 --> 00:20:39,703
YOU SMELL ALL FUNKY.
444
00:20:39,738 --> 00:20:42,339
WHY DON'T YOU COME IN?
I'LL FIX YOU SOMETHING FRESH.
445
00:20:42,375 --> 00:20:43,874
OH, I... HA HA.
446
00:20:43,909 --> 00:20:46,477
OKAY, YEAH, ACTUALLY,
JUST GIVE ME A MINUTE.
447
00:20:46,512 --> 00:20:47,711
I'LL BE RIGHT...
448
00:20:47,746 --> 00:20:50,381
I'M JUST GOING TO GRAB
THE GARBAGE HERE.
449
00:21:05,832 --> 00:21:07,064
HEY, LOOK, LOOK...
450
00:21:07,099 --> 00:21:11,168
CAPTAIN KARMA'S
IN TOWN. GO SEE HIM.
451
00:21:11,204 --> 00:21:13,537
YOU DO... YOU...
YOU... YOU... YOU...
452
00:21:13,572 --> 00:21:16,740
YOU... YOU...
YOU... YOU... YOU...
453
00:21:16,775 --> 00:21:20,744
I'LL JUST KEEP STUFFING
THIS UP MY NOSE, BABY.
454
00:21:20,779 --> 00:21:24,014
I DIDN'T SIGN THAT
"THE BERGSTER," DID I?
455
00:21:24,050 --> 00:21:29,253
NO? UH...
456
00:21:29,288 --> 00:21:31,755
DYING A SLOW AND
PAINFUL DEATH NOW.
29713
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