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The year of our Lord 1645.
England is on its knees.
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A kingdom blighted by civil war,
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plague,
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00:00:10,080 --> 00:00:12,080
but most of all,
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witchery.
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Yet God has sent forth a breed
of man to hold these wretches
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to the cleansing fires of justice.
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Witchfinder!
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Yes, I'm the Witchfinder,
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00:00:22,880 --> 00:00:26,240
here to tell the true tale
of a wretch called Elizabeth Snell.
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She worshipped the devil,
got down on her knees,
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and used his dark powers
to murder her niece.
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Hang her!
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Hang her!
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Can't hear you!
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Hang her!!
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That's better!
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Her windpipe gives way,
the neck starts to crack.
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The weight of her body
fractures her back.
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CHEERING
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Her eyes start to bulge,
her bowels open wide,
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the last meal she had
is no longer inside.
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Oh, I didn't know they
shat themselves.
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For women like Elizabeth
are easily led.
25
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She was an only child who never wed,
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and if there are
no further questions...
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I've got a question.
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What?
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I thought you said
she murdered her niece.
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Yes... If she was an only child,
how did she even have a niece?
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Oh, for God's sake.
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Well, he said if anyone's
got any questions...
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The Witchfinder is meant
for the children.
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If you had any respect,
you'd shut your mouth.
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You know that's not Witchfinder.
That is a man in a tent.
36
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Well, don't ruin it!
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Is it really a man in a tent?
Oh, well done!
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It's not a tent. It's a booth!
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What is wrong with you?
40
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Why not let it go?
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I'm just interested. Yeah, well,
you would be, wouldn't you?
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And what's that supposed to mean?!
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Witches!!
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They've found a coven of witches!!
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SHOUTING
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Hey! I've not passed the hat round!
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What about the...?
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Oh, hello.
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SINGING
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# Write them on
the wishing wall... #
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# If you be a man of
old world...fame
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# Then tell me
all their father's names
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# Of the well below the valley
54
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# Green grow the lilies... #
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Now, that's a lovely hat.
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With genuinely lovely, um...
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..I want to say angles.
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It's by Charles Booth of London.
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Of course it is.
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One can't skimp on a hat.
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It's very much the, um,
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shoe of the head. The, er...
63
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..the glove of the, um...
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..head again.
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It's classic Booth, is what it is.
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Would you mind
if I took it for a stroll?
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A stroll? Just four minutes.
Just, er, see how she wears.
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We've got five minutes. Four!
Thank you!
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Fuck off. I just don't
see the need for this.
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We are talking about
a whole coven.
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Four witches
and a pact with the devil.
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You think the magistrate's going
to employ me with my old hat?!
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The brim droops
like a dog's tongue.
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I like dogs.
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I like dogs!
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I just don't want their tongue
slapping against my forehead.
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OK, there he is. Ready?
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Ready?
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00:03:06,240 --> 00:03:08,760
Yes... Yes, I'm ready, Gideon!
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Oh! Little curtsy?
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Goodbye.
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Good Lord.
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MUTTERS TO HIMSELF
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LOUD COUGH
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Good Lord! Magistrate!
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I'm so sorry. Forgive my haste.
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I will, of course, have my
book-keeper reimburse you
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for any crumpling to your garments.
89
00:03:38,160 --> 00:03:40,560
You have a book-keeper?!
I have a book-keeper, yes!
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For all the work that's come in
since I last saw you.
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Still, good day.
92
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Something you wanted?
93
00:03:46,320 --> 00:03:47,920
Oh, no. No, no.
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Just passing through.
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I'm on my way to Snetterton
to question a suspected witch.
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Is it Snetterton...?
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Constantin on the Monday
for the trial,
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00:03:54,840 --> 00:03:56,680
then off to Norwich
for the possessed chorister,
99
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so yes, Snetterton. Snetterton, as
a favour to the magistrate, really.
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He's worried that witchery running
amok will reflect badly upon him.
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The last thing a magistrate needs
is panic spreading around the town
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like the pox.
103
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For God's sake, Mr Bannister.
Is that what this is?
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Hmm? You grubbing for work?
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No! Work?!
106
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Ha-ha! I already explained.
107
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I'm on my way to Snetterton.
108
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Yes. Snetterton's that way.
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From over there.
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Honestly.
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If I wanted to investigate
the coven, don't you think
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I'd come round and ask?
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No, because you've been told
to not come round and ask,
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and this is your way of dangling
yourself in front of me
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without doing that. Popping out
on some prearranged signal!
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The woman has a cough!
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If I needed...
SHE COUGHS
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Jesus wept.
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If I needed a witchfinder,
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there's plenty of them around.
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Fine!
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I don't have a book-keeper
and this is...
123
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..a borrowed hat. It's borrowed hat,
yes, which I may ultimately buy.
124
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But what I do have is knowledge,
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expertise,
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and, quite frankly, balls.
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Two of them. Massive.
128
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Enough to tackle the gravest
cases of witchery, like your coven.
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Oh, well, I've no coven for you.
130
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But...
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But I do have one thorny case
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if you think you and your balls
can handle it.
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Oh, the three of us will
be just fine, I'm sure.
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What's this?
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This is the victim.
136
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It's a pig.
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A pig killed by sorcery.
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You should have heard him.
139
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He said I was the town's
pre-eminent witchfinder.
140
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What, you are?! Trusted
with the gravest witchery.
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SHE SQUEALS
Decorum, decorum, decorum.
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And he said there were a couple
of rooms at the tavern
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waiting for us -
just say his name.
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Mr Topcliffe.
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To the landlady. Oh!
Wouldn't be to me, would it?
146
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Oh! Decorum, decorum.
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Do you remember when you used
to ride that little pig
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in the village? Genevieve.
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Vaguely. Had a heart attack,
didn't she? All right, all right.
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May God have mercy on her soul.
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There weren't enough for you.
152
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Oh, don't apologise, master.
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Don't think I did. Oh, and, er...
154
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Yes, Master? Oh...
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Watch out for that shit.
Thank you, Master.
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I said I'll trim your beard.
It's what you pay me for.
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It's actually not
what I pay you for.
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Last time you did it,
you gave it corners.
159
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It's Hebble!
Come away from the window!
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Oh, let him see.
161
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Your beard's looking full.
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At least he can grow one!
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Great to see you, Mr Hebble.
164
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You here to lobby
for this coven job?
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There is no coven job.
Yours was a wasted journey.
166
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Then why take a room?
167
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Oh, nothing much.
168
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Just being offered another job.
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I'm delighted for you.
What is it this time?
170
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Someone else cursed with eczema?
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A goat that cries like a baby?
172
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Remember that fruit picker
who had a demon in his hedge?
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There wasn't a demon in his hedge.
174
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You'd know. You interrogated it.
To rule it out.
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How's my work going?
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I don't remember asking you that.
Good question.
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Which I didn't ask.
178
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Fucking well. You probably heard
about the three witches I convicted
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near Mattishall for destroying
a village in a mudslide.
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I've been awarded
the freedom of Girton.
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Oh, the freedom of Girton! Wow-ee!
What does that entail?
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Is there a fenced-off bit that the
rest of us aren't allowed into? No.
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So identical to NOT having
the freedom of Girton then.
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You must be thrilled.
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HE CHUCKLES
186
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Is there something else.
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No.
188
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Do feel free to go!
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I will.
190
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And yet you haven't.
191
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Just enjoying the town.
192
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Toss pot.
193
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SHOUTING
194
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Yes! The baying mob. Oh, lovely.
195
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What is baying?
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Um... It's just something mobs do.
197
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Egg.
198
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Right.
199
00:08:07,920 --> 00:08:10,640
We pray for protection against
the wickedness and sins
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of the devil. May God rebuke him.
201
00:08:12,480 --> 00:08:15,040
We pray for protection against the
wickedness and sins...
202
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DOOR CREAKS OPEN
203
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Yup.
204
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Thank you.
205
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It's like that, is it?
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I see women like you...
207
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..all the time.
208
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Hard, impenetrable,
209
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revealing none of what's inside.
210
00:08:40,840 --> 00:08:44,560
But then I set to work
and all of a sudden...
211
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Oh, look. She's broken.
212
00:08:49,160 --> 00:08:51,080
And it all comes out.
213
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I fucking told you!
214
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Oh, I see.
215
00:08:54,360 --> 00:08:55,680
I'm so sorry.
216
00:08:55,720 --> 00:08:56,840
I thought you were...
217
00:08:56,880 --> 00:08:58,680
I thought she was...
218
00:08:58,720 --> 00:09:01,240
I've done nothing! Silence!
219
00:09:01,280 --> 00:09:03,840
Do you have to be that close?
Your dick is in my armpit.
220
00:09:03,880 --> 00:09:05,560
My dick is not in her armpit.
Some of it is.
221
00:09:05,600 --> 00:09:07,600
It's not love, I wouldn't.
Careful! Don't goad the witch!
222
00:09:07,640 --> 00:09:08,800
I'm not a witch!
223
00:09:08,840 --> 00:09:11,120
Tell that to my pig!
I never wanted him to die.
224
00:09:11,160 --> 00:09:13,720
And how are you planning on getting
the pork out? Shit bacon, does he?
225
00:09:13,760 --> 00:09:15,680
You have the devil in you, lady!
226
00:09:15,720 --> 00:09:17,640
Contrary, idle...
227
00:09:17,680 --> 00:09:18,800
And why does she live alone?!
228
00:09:18,840 --> 00:09:20,560
What sort of woman
remains unmarried?
229
00:09:20,600 --> 00:09:22,880
Lots of women are unmarried.
Your sister's unmarried!
230
00:09:22,920 --> 00:09:24,920
She's not unmarried
the way you're unmarried.
231
00:09:24,960 --> 00:09:26,960
There's something not right
about the way you're unmarried.
232
00:09:27,000 --> 00:09:28,760
I agree, actually...
Oh, fuck off, Anne.
233
00:09:28,800 --> 00:09:30,280
I swear to God, I will hit you...
234
00:09:30,320 --> 00:09:32,400
Put the jug down.
235
00:09:33,800 --> 00:09:37,240
No-one leaves this room
without my express permission.
236
00:09:37,280 --> 00:09:40,960
Old Myers will now bag the suspect's
possessions as evidence while I...
237
00:09:41,000 --> 00:09:43,120
Sorry, who are you?
I'm the witchfinder.
238
00:09:43,160 --> 00:09:45,640
Oh, finally! You know, they
said a witchfinder was coming
239
00:09:45,680 --> 00:09:47,800
and I thought,
"Do you know what? Good.
240
00:09:47,840 --> 00:09:49,920
"Someone with half a brain
to sort this out."
241
00:09:49,960 --> 00:09:52,840
I said, "As long as he knows what
he's going on about, then that's
great."
242
00:09:52,880 --> 00:09:55,560
As long as I... ..know what you're
going on about, then that's great.
243
00:09:55,600 --> 00:09:58,040
I do know what I'm going on about.
Then that's great.
244
00:09:58,080 --> 00:10:01,400
My name is Gideon Bannister.
245
00:10:01,440 --> 00:10:03,840
Some of you may have heard the name.
246
00:10:06,680 --> 00:10:10,160
That's a no. My job is to determine
whether the suspect,
247
00:10:10,200 --> 00:10:12,320
one, Thomasine Gooch,
248
00:10:12,360 --> 00:10:15,440
has pledged herself to the devil.
249
00:10:15,480 --> 00:10:20,600
Because let me tell you,
I see women like you all the time.
250
00:10:20,640 --> 00:10:22,200
Hard.
251
00:10:22,240 --> 00:10:23,400
Impenetrable...
252
00:10:23,440 --> 00:10:25,200
Another egg? No, cheers.
253
00:10:25,240 --> 00:10:27,480
But then I set to work...
Another egg?
254
00:10:27,520 --> 00:10:28,840
So that's your egg on the floor?
255
00:10:28,880 --> 00:10:31,000
Well, regardless of that, I'm...
Never mind regardless,
256
00:10:31,040 --> 00:10:32,480
you just dropped egg on my floor.
257
00:10:32,520 --> 00:10:34,200
Can we please get back
to talking about
258
00:10:34,240 --> 00:10:36,320
the maleficium
that you're accused of?
259
00:10:36,360 --> 00:10:38,960
I think we should, yeah. Yeah,
I think we should, too, yeah.
260
00:10:39,000 --> 00:10:40,360
After you've picked up that egg.
261
00:10:40,400 --> 00:10:42,600
Myers, clear it up.
She didn't drop the egg.
262
00:10:42,640 --> 00:10:44,520
Look, you have two options here.
263
00:10:44,560 --> 00:10:47,080
The first is you just admit
to the crime and we move on...
264
00:10:47,120 --> 00:10:49,440
Look, I want to work with you,
you want to work with me...
265
00:10:49,480 --> 00:10:52,360
The one that we don't want to do
really, if we can avoid it...
266
00:10:52,400 --> 00:10:54,840
..pick up the egg.
..would be to start stalling
267
00:10:54,880 --> 00:10:57,120
so that I have to use more and
more imaginative means
268
00:10:57,160 --> 00:10:59,320
trying to squeeze the confession out
of you. ..I want to work with you.
269
00:10:59,360 --> 00:11:01,920
Do you see that?
So which course do you want to take?
270
00:11:01,960 --> 00:11:03,440
Which course? I can see it there.
271
00:11:03,480 --> 00:11:05,440
THEY STOP TALKING SIMULTANEOUSLY
272
00:11:12,760 --> 00:11:14,920
Now... Some there. OK.
273
00:11:18,560 --> 00:11:19,800
Right, now,
274
00:11:19,840 --> 00:11:21,680
you can see, if you ask around,
275
00:11:21,720 --> 00:11:25,360
there really is nothing to it. Yes,
well, there's not nothing to it,
276
00:11:25,400 --> 00:11:26,880
is there? Her pig's dead.
277
00:11:26,920 --> 00:11:28,040
It was like 100.
278
00:11:28,080 --> 00:11:30,360
And then we have
your ungodly behaviour,
279
00:11:30,400 --> 00:11:31,960
your repellent character.
280
00:11:32,000 --> 00:11:34,880
I like a drink. Yes, and this
is before we even discuss
281
00:11:34,920 --> 00:11:36,640
Brown Peter... My chicken.
282
00:11:36,680 --> 00:11:37,760
Your imp!
283
00:11:37,800 --> 00:11:41,200
Witnesses saw a demon
in animal form
284
00:11:41,240 --> 00:11:44,840
approaching your dwelling
to suckle at your teat!
285
00:11:44,880 --> 00:11:48,040
Be gone foul creature!
In Christ's name be gone!
286
00:11:48,080 --> 00:11:49,360
It's a chicken.
287
00:11:49,400 --> 00:11:50,400
Oh! Myers?
288
00:11:50,440 --> 00:11:55,160
"The beast strode to the door
with a purposeful gait."
289
00:11:55,200 --> 00:11:58,200
That's how they walk.
They don't stroll around whistling.
290
00:11:58,240 --> 00:12:01,760
Then one wonders how this
whole thing has arisen.
291
00:12:01,800 --> 00:12:05,360
Know what you could do instead
of wondering? Ask something.
292
00:12:05,400 --> 00:12:07,120
Yeah, you'd love that, wouldn't you?
293
00:12:07,160 --> 00:12:10,880
Always twisting and pulling at
things with unnecessary questions.
294
00:12:10,920 --> 00:12:12,440
It's a necessary question.
295
00:12:12,480 --> 00:12:13,880
Do I have a plough behind me?
296
00:12:13,920 --> 00:12:15,480
Are you done with that chicken?
297
00:12:15,520 --> 00:12:16,600
Do I have a lump?
298
00:12:16,640 --> 00:12:18,560
I thought witchfinders
were meant to ask questions.
299
00:12:18,600 --> 00:12:19,760
You're just saying stuff.
300
00:12:19,800 --> 00:12:22,640
That witchfinder looking into the
coven, he asked loads of questions.
301
00:12:22,680 --> 00:12:24,720
Well, for your information,
there is no coven.
302
00:12:24,760 --> 00:12:26,840
For your information,
there is a coven.
303
00:12:26,880 --> 00:12:27,960
I thought there was, yeah.
304
00:12:28,000 --> 00:12:29,440
Then why would your magistrate
305
00:12:29,480 --> 00:12:32,280
specifically tell me
there is no coven?
306
00:12:32,320 --> 00:12:34,680
Well, maybe he didn't
want to give you the work
307
00:12:34,720 --> 00:12:37,000
because he didn't want to give you
anything serious.
308
00:12:43,480 --> 00:12:44,600
Fucking hell.
309
00:12:48,720 --> 00:12:50,240
Is it not true...
310
00:12:51,280 --> 00:12:54,640
..that you did enter into a pact
with these women
311
00:12:54,680 --> 00:12:57,480
to do the devil's bidding?!
312
00:12:57,520 --> 00:12:58,760
The devil!
313
00:12:58,800 --> 00:13:02,200
That you convened a sabbot
314
00:13:02,240 --> 00:13:05,880
and together put a pox
upon the fairest children?
315
00:13:05,920 --> 00:13:08,040
God rest their souls.
316
00:13:09,280 --> 00:13:12,360
It is clear to me
that you have allowed the...
317
00:13:12,400 --> 00:13:16,560
You look like the cat who's watching
the other cat get the cream.
318
00:13:16,600 --> 00:13:18,320
A real sour puss.
319
00:13:18,360 --> 00:13:19,880
Fuck off.
320
00:13:19,920 --> 00:13:21,360
Excuse me.
321
00:13:21,400 --> 00:13:23,920
..and who sealed this pact...
322
00:13:25,080 --> 00:13:28,560
Did you not lie with Satan...
323
00:13:29,880 --> 00:13:30,920
..Connolly?
324
00:13:30,960 --> 00:13:32,560
CROWD GASPS
325
00:13:32,600 --> 00:13:37,480
Did you not lie
with Satan Connolly?!
326
00:13:37,520 --> 00:13:38,960
Simple question, love.
327
00:13:39,000 --> 00:13:40,160
Did you fuck the devil?
328
00:13:40,200 --> 00:13:41,440
I did.
329
00:13:41,480 --> 00:13:43,640
I did!
330
00:13:43,680 --> 00:13:47,240
Two words that are truly damning.
331
00:13:47,280 --> 00:13:50,680
Two words that point to one word.
332
00:13:55,960 --> 00:14:00,560
Witch!
333
00:14:00,600 --> 00:14:03,760
CROWD SHOUTS AND CHANTS
334
00:14:06,640 --> 00:14:08,840
Oh! He's good, isn't he?
335
00:14:08,880 --> 00:14:10,520
Yeah, fantastic. He's good!
336
00:14:10,560 --> 00:14:12,920
You know, different from you.
Different.
337
00:14:12,960 --> 00:14:15,440
He is different. Not better,
not better, just different.
338
00:14:15,480 --> 00:14:17,520
You wouldn't want this case,
though, would you?
339
00:14:17,560 --> 00:14:19,000
Three dead kids.
340
00:14:19,040 --> 00:14:21,040
I would bloody love three dead kids!
341
00:14:22,640 --> 00:14:24,680
I'd love three dead kids.
342
00:14:24,720 --> 00:14:26,920
Some proper witchcraft!
343
00:14:26,960 --> 00:14:30,480
Rather than this "he said, she said"
domestic quarrels,
344
00:14:30,520 --> 00:14:34,560
while all the best work
goes to this bellowing ape.
345
00:14:34,600 --> 00:14:35,840
I like apes.
346
00:14:35,880 --> 00:14:36,960
I like apes!
347
00:14:37,000 --> 00:14:39,680
I just don't like them
nicking my bloody work. Mm.
348
00:14:39,720 --> 00:14:40,960
Topcliffe.
349
00:14:41,000 --> 00:14:42,200
Excuse me.
350
00:14:42,240 --> 00:14:44,520
You said there was no coven.
351
00:14:44,560 --> 00:14:46,320
Those were your exact words.
352
00:14:46,360 --> 00:14:47,960
No, no. My exact words were...
353
00:14:48,000 --> 00:14:49,880
"There's no coven for you".
354
00:14:49,920 --> 00:14:51,320
That's cute.
355
00:14:51,360 --> 00:14:54,360
Come on. Everyone has their level.
356
00:14:54,400 --> 00:14:57,600
Look, if you think
I'm going to ask John Stern,
357
00:14:57,640 --> 00:15:00,560
one of the most respected
witchfinders in the country,
358
00:15:00,600 --> 00:15:02,160
who happens to be passing
through town
359
00:15:02,200 --> 00:15:04,440
and offers us his assistance...
John Stern?
360
00:15:04,480 --> 00:15:06,080
That man was John Stern?!
361
00:15:06,120 --> 00:15:08,880
But he's the right hand man
to Matthew Hopkins,
362
00:15:08,920 --> 00:15:10,440
the Witchfinder General.
363
00:15:12,680 --> 00:15:14,120
Is there something you wanted?
364
00:15:14,160 --> 00:15:15,640
Me? Yes.
365
00:15:15,680 --> 00:15:18,360
No, no. Just thinking about
the Witchfinder General.
366
00:15:22,520 --> 00:15:24,920
RAUCOUS LAUGHTER
367
00:15:24,960 --> 00:15:28,440
And because they were twins,
you couldn't tell which was which!
368
00:15:30,000 --> 00:15:31,480
There you go, boys.
369
00:15:31,520 --> 00:15:34,320
Yeah, another bowl of cherries
for the table.
370
00:15:34,360 --> 00:15:35,840
You've not paid for these yet.
371
00:15:35,880 --> 00:15:38,080
Paid?! This is John Stern.
372
00:15:38,120 --> 00:15:40,120
Is that supposed to mean
something to me?
373
00:15:40,160 --> 00:15:41,320
Well, let's see.
374
00:15:42,760 --> 00:15:45,000
Does your daughter
mean anything to you?
375
00:15:45,040 --> 00:15:46,080
What?
376
00:15:46,120 --> 00:15:48,520
Your daughter. The one
who sneaks off every night
377
00:15:48,560 --> 00:15:50,680
to fetch off the devil? My daughter?
378
00:15:50,720 --> 00:15:52,120
Fetching of the devil?
379
00:15:52,160 --> 00:15:54,520
Who's saying that...?
Well, I did and you just have,
380
00:15:54,560 --> 00:15:55,640
so that's two already.
381
00:15:55,680 --> 00:15:58,560
I only said it... See how quickly
these things catch fire?
382
00:15:59,600 --> 00:16:01,880
That's how quickly your
daughter's hair will catch fire
383
00:16:01,920 --> 00:16:04,160
when I have her burned as a witch.
384
00:16:04,200 --> 00:16:06,160
I'll get your cherries.
385
00:16:09,120 --> 00:16:11,240
I hate having to do that,
but it's just quicker.
386
00:16:11,280 --> 00:16:12,840
LAUGHTER
387
00:16:12,880 --> 00:16:14,960
Sorry, you were saying
about scripture...
388
00:16:15,000 --> 00:16:17,600
Ah, now. It's important.
I could quote scripture.
389
00:16:17,640 --> 00:16:18,880
I could say,
390
00:16:18,920 --> 00:16:24,000
"A woman that hath a familiar spirit
shall surely be put to death."
391
00:16:24,040 --> 00:16:28,840
Now, some witchfinders will be able
to tell you the chapter and verse...
392
00:16:28,880 --> 00:16:30,360
Leviticus 20:27.
393
00:16:30,400 --> 00:16:32,840
..whereas others, like me,
like Matthew -
394
00:16:32,880 --> 00:16:35,080
that ilk - we're not bothered. No.
395
00:16:35,120 --> 00:16:37,800
We're more focused
on the bigger picture.
396
00:16:37,840 --> 00:16:40,320
Who cares? Yes, might not
be Chapter 20 in the end.
397
00:16:40,360 --> 00:16:41,760
It might not be Chapter 20.
398
00:16:41,800 --> 00:16:43,520
I'm not sure.
Not sure about what?
399
00:16:43,560 --> 00:16:45,840
Well, which one - what he was
saying about the bigger picture.
400
00:16:45,880 --> 00:16:48,040
You need to... In fact,
I'll talk to him.
401
00:16:48,080 --> 00:16:53,000
I have to say, I have written
a witchfinding pamphlet myself,
402
00:16:53,040 --> 00:16:54,680
which I've got here.
403
00:16:54,720 --> 00:16:56,200
I'll just find a seat.
404
00:16:56,240 --> 00:16:59,400
It is called
"An Observation of the Study
405
00:16:59,440 --> 00:17:02,200
"of the Nature of the
Foulness of witches".
406
00:17:02,240 --> 00:17:04,880
Maybe one too many "of the" there,
but my plan is...
407
00:17:04,920 --> 00:17:06,720
You're in my seat. Off I go. Lovely.
408
00:17:06,760 --> 00:17:08,320
Happy to stand. Love standing.
409
00:17:08,360 --> 00:17:11,480
Now. My name is Gideon Bannister.
410
00:17:11,520 --> 00:17:14,040
I loved...
411
00:17:14,080 --> 00:17:16,320
..loved your prosecuting earlier.
412
00:17:16,360 --> 00:17:17,760
Some lovely scripture.
413
00:17:17,800 --> 00:17:20,120
Lovely scripture.
Crowd in the palm of your hands.
414
00:17:20,160 --> 00:17:21,920
Fantastic peppering of Latin...
415
00:17:21,960 --> 00:17:24,480
And a little tonic
for loosening the tongue.
416
00:17:24,520 --> 00:17:26,560
Red Cap mushroom, crushed and dried.
417
00:17:26,600 --> 00:17:27,960
GIDEON LAUGHS
418
00:17:28,000 --> 00:17:30,480
You will excuse Mr Hebble.
419
00:17:30,520 --> 00:17:33,600
You might have to resort
to the use of intoxicants
420
00:17:33,640 --> 00:17:35,080
to secure a conviction,
421
00:17:35,120 --> 00:17:37,160
but witchfinders like John and me
422
00:17:37,200 --> 00:17:41,640
prefer to rely on scriptures,
scruples and scrutiny.
423
00:17:41,680 --> 00:17:43,600
The three "scrus".
424
00:17:43,640 --> 00:17:45,600
And I believe, if I'm not wrong,
425
00:17:45,640 --> 00:17:47,000
that belongs to you.
426
00:17:47,040 --> 00:17:48,880
And apologies for that.
427
00:17:48,920 --> 00:17:51,160
Now, if you'll excuse us, Mr Hebble,
428
00:17:51,200 --> 00:17:54,440
John and me are talking about
my witchfinding pamphlet...
429
00:17:54,480 --> 00:17:56,480
That's the second time
you've said "John and me".
430
00:17:56,520 --> 00:17:58,880
There is no "John and me".
431
00:18:01,880 --> 00:18:04,320
It's not like
you're a proper witchfinder.
432
00:18:04,360 --> 00:18:06,880
Well, I am a witchfinder.
433
00:18:06,920 --> 00:18:09,040
Because you have
a witchfinder's hat?
434
00:18:09,080 --> 00:18:10,720
And the cloak?
435
00:18:10,760 --> 00:18:13,640
Put a scarecrow
in a farmer's hat and coat,
436
00:18:13,680 --> 00:18:15,080
does that make it a farmer?
437
00:18:16,600 --> 00:18:19,040
I'm engaged in a case
across the square.
438
00:18:19,080 --> 00:18:21,920
Oh. Let me know
if it comes to trial.
439
00:18:21,960 --> 00:18:24,920
I'm sure Mr Hopkins will be keen
to hear of a good new witchfinder.
440
00:18:24,960 --> 00:18:26,000
Tomorrow morning.
441
00:18:26,040 --> 00:18:27,840
They're going to try her
tomorrow morning? Yup.
442
00:18:27,880 --> 00:18:30,440
On stage, or... On stage.
All welcome.
443
00:18:30,480 --> 00:18:32,440
I might come to that.
Please do.
444
00:18:32,480 --> 00:18:33,880
Please do.
445
00:18:35,000 --> 00:18:36,160
Please do.
446
00:18:37,240 --> 00:18:38,960
COCKEREL CROWS
447
00:18:39,000 --> 00:18:41,680
HE BREATHES DEEPLY
448
00:18:44,760 --> 00:18:46,240
Does your head fill the whole hat,
449
00:18:46,280 --> 00:18:48,400
or have you paid
for more hat than you need?
450
00:18:48,440 --> 00:18:51,040
If I were you, I'd concern
myself with the charges
451
00:18:51,080 --> 00:18:52,600
levelled against me.
452
00:18:52,640 --> 00:18:55,320
And try not to be intimidated
by my manner up there.
453
00:18:55,360 --> 00:18:56,680
I'll try not to be.
454
00:18:56,720 --> 00:19:00,440
I can be a little fearsome,
especially when I hit top volume.
455
00:19:00,480 --> 00:19:01,640
Yes. Understood.
456
00:19:01,680 --> 00:19:04,040
Equally, don't be thrown by the...
457
00:19:04,080 --> 00:19:06,920
..flourishes that accompany my work.
458
00:19:08,080 --> 00:19:09,480
Dare say I'll manage.
459
00:19:09,520 --> 00:19:12,160
You do realise
you're on trial for witchery?
460
00:19:12,200 --> 00:19:14,240
You do realise I've lived here
my whole life?
461
00:19:14,280 --> 00:19:15,760
I drink in the tavern.
462
00:19:15,800 --> 00:19:17,480
My dad used to sell meat
to everyone here.
463
00:19:17,520 --> 00:19:19,520
I'm Meaty Gooch's girl.
Meaty Gooch?
464
00:19:19,560 --> 00:19:21,800
When they find out what the
Griffins have been saying,
465
00:19:21,840 --> 00:19:23,160
you're just going to get laughed at.
466
00:19:23,200 --> 00:19:24,440
Oh Master Gideon, Master Gideon!
467
00:19:24,480 --> 00:19:26,040
You know how I've been
looking for Mr Stern?
468
00:19:26,080 --> 00:19:27,640
You found him? No. Staggering.
469
00:19:27,680 --> 00:19:29,640
But his horse is still here.
470
00:19:29,680 --> 00:19:31,320
So he's still in town.
471
00:19:31,360 --> 00:19:32,960
But "in town" is no good to us!
472
00:19:33,000 --> 00:19:35,240
He needs to be out there
bloody watching!
473
00:19:35,280 --> 00:19:39,960
This is how John Stern came
into the employ of Matthew Hopkins!
474
00:19:40,000 --> 00:19:42,680
Public prosecution like this
could be the making of me.
475
00:19:42,720 --> 00:19:45,200
So stand up and go and find him!
476
00:19:45,240 --> 00:19:47,160
KNOCKING
477
00:19:47,200 --> 00:19:49,560
Does that mean it's starting?
Yes! Come on, let's go.
478
00:19:49,600 --> 00:19:51,600
Head held high. Out we go.
479
00:19:51,640 --> 00:19:53,520
Oh, Mary's here! Shut up.
480
00:19:53,560 --> 00:19:54,800
Mary! Shut up!
481
00:19:54,840 --> 00:19:56,400
You are a woman of God, are you not?
482
00:19:56,440 --> 00:19:58,360
Yes.
483
00:19:58,400 --> 00:20:00,480
Testifying under oath
before the Lord?
484
00:20:00,520 --> 00:20:01,560
Yes.
485
00:20:01,600 --> 00:20:03,640
And you've seen this woman
at close quarters?
486
00:20:03,680 --> 00:20:04,680
Yes.
487
00:20:04,720 --> 00:20:06,800
Formed a view of her character?
488
00:20:06,840 --> 00:20:07,920
Yes.
489
00:20:07,960 --> 00:20:11,640
Shaped, no doubt, by the
inexplicable death of your pig?
490
00:20:11,680 --> 00:20:12,840
Yes.
491
00:20:12,880 --> 00:20:15,920
Do you believe Thomasine Gooch
to be a witch?
492
00:20:15,960 --> 00:20:17,080
Yes, I do.
493
00:20:17,120 --> 00:20:18,400
Yes.
494
00:20:18,440 --> 00:20:20,720
SHOUTING
"Yes, I do.
495
00:20:20,760 --> 00:20:22,120
"Yes."
496
00:20:23,200 --> 00:20:24,560
Four words...
497
00:20:26,400 --> 00:20:27,840
..or two words...
498
00:20:29,000 --> 00:20:31,080
..twice bookended by a third,
499
00:20:31,120 --> 00:20:32,600
that are truly damning.
500
00:20:32,640 --> 00:20:33,760
Thank you.
501
00:20:35,040 --> 00:20:36,280
Bit quicker.
502
00:20:37,520 --> 00:20:40,440
My name is Gideon Bannister.
Some of you may know me.
503
00:20:42,360 --> 00:20:44,520
..and I'm here today...
That's unbelievable.
504
00:20:45,640 --> 00:20:50,000
And I'm here today in the presence
of your magistrate, Mr Topcliffe,
505
00:20:50,040 --> 00:20:52,840
and I believe Mr John Stern
is with us today...
506
00:20:52,880 --> 00:20:54,040
Um...
507
00:20:54,080 --> 00:20:55,840
No, not quite yet.
508
00:20:55,880 --> 00:20:58,880
..to present the case
against Thomasine Gooch,
509
00:20:58,920 --> 00:21:01,320
who used sorcery,
510
00:21:01,360 --> 00:21:06,320
which led to the demise
of Goodwife Griffin's pig,
511
00:21:06,360 --> 00:21:10,360
cherished as it was
like a member of her own family.
512
00:21:10,400 --> 00:21:11,880
Definite likeness. Pardon me?
513
00:21:11,920 --> 00:21:13,160
Nothing.
514
00:21:13,200 --> 00:21:15,840
I'm ever so sorry,
does this amuse you?
515
00:21:15,880 --> 00:21:17,880
A bit, yeah. A bit? Does it?
516
00:21:17,920 --> 00:21:20,040
Then it might amuse you to hear
that you are charged
517
00:21:20,080 --> 00:21:22,080
with the crime of maleficium,
or harm by sorcery!
518
00:21:22,120 --> 00:21:23,240
Well, which one is it?
519
00:21:24,520 --> 00:21:26,760
What? Maleficium or harm by sorcery?
520
00:21:26,800 --> 00:21:28,600
Maleficium is harm by sorcery!
521
00:21:28,640 --> 00:21:30,840
Would it not just have been easier
to say "harm by sorcery"?
522
00:21:30,880 --> 00:21:32,000
Quicker to say Maleficium.
523
00:21:32,040 --> 00:21:34,360
Not if you have to explain
that it's harm by sorcery.
524
00:21:34,400 --> 00:21:38,120
I wasn't to know that you
didn't know what maleficium was.
525
00:21:38,160 --> 00:21:40,640
Maybe next time
just say "harm by sorcery",
526
00:21:40,680 --> 00:21:42,480
unless you think
it sounds better in Latin.
527
00:21:42,520 --> 00:21:43,920
Up to you.
528
00:21:43,960 --> 00:21:46,280
English or Latin...
529
00:21:47,680 --> 00:21:49,240
..you made a pact with the devil.
530
00:21:49,280 --> 00:21:50,520
I'm not being funny,
531
00:21:50,560 --> 00:21:53,160
but the only ones that have
accused me of being a witch
532
00:21:53,200 --> 00:21:54,480
are the Griffins.
533
00:21:54,520 --> 00:21:55,680
Ask anyone.
534
00:21:55,720 --> 00:21:56,800
Susan!
535
00:21:56,840 --> 00:21:58,560
Susan Archibald!
536
00:21:58,600 --> 00:22:00,160
Or the Murrows.
537
00:22:00,200 --> 00:22:01,560
John Murrow! Judy Murrow!
538
00:22:01,600 --> 00:22:03,760
Ask any of them,
and they'll vouch for me.
539
00:22:03,800 --> 00:22:06,920
The Murrows described you
as "ungodly".
540
00:22:06,960 --> 00:22:08,000
What?!
541
00:22:08,040 --> 00:22:10,640
Goodwife Archibald refers to you
as a, um...
542
00:22:12,080 --> 00:22:13,360
Well, I won't say the word,
543
00:22:13,400 --> 00:22:14,880
but it becunts with the letter C.
544
00:22:14,920 --> 00:22:17,080
You people!
545
00:22:17,120 --> 00:22:19,120
My God!
546
00:22:19,160 --> 00:22:23,080
If I was a witch,
you lot would know about it!
547
00:22:23,120 --> 00:22:27,400
I'd cast a spell to put ale in
the well to liven you lot up a bit!
548
00:22:27,440 --> 00:22:30,280
Maybe get you to admit
to the ungodly stuff that you do.
549
00:22:30,320 --> 00:22:33,400
Like sneaking across the square
at 5am to get back
550
00:22:33,440 --> 00:22:35,280
into bed before your wife wakes up.
551
00:22:35,320 --> 00:22:36,400
I sleepwalk!
552
00:22:36,440 --> 00:22:39,520
Or telling your sister that her hair
looks nice piled up like that,
553
00:22:39,560 --> 00:22:42,120
when actually she looks like
she's got a pie on her head!
554
00:22:42,160 --> 00:22:44,400
All of you lot have
got something to hide,
555
00:22:44,440 --> 00:22:45,720
but no...
556
00:22:45,760 --> 00:22:47,360
..I'm the witch!
557
00:22:47,400 --> 00:22:49,520
Oh, at last a confession!
558
00:22:49,560 --> 00:22:51,320
No! No, no, no... No, I...
559
00:22:51,360 --> 00:22:53,840
I think we're still waiting
for John Stern.
560
00:22:53,880 --> 00:22:56,400
I think the case for the
prosecution rests.
561
00:22:56,440 --> 00:22:58,520
Right now, prepare the defendant.
562
00:22:58,560 --> 00:23:00,160
JEERING AND SHOUTING
563
00:23:00,200 --> 00:23:01,880
Gideon, where are you going?!
564
00:23:01,920 --> 00:23:04,160
They're just about to announce it!
565
00:23:04,200 --> 00:23:08,440
Pointless. I'm fed up, traipsing
around to these stupid towns -
566
00:23:08,480 --> 00:23:11,120
your Snettertons and your Banhams
and your...
567
00:23:11,160 --> 00:23:13,760
Girton. Yes, Girton. Exactly!
568
00:23:13,800 --> 00:23:16,120
Poxy little towns
with stupid little cases.
569
00:23:16,160 --> 00:23:17,600
Are you hungry, Gideon?
570
00:23:17,640 --> 00:23:19,160
I'm hungry for more!
571
00:23:19,200 --> 00:23:21,120
I thought you did very well
up there.
572
00:23:21,160 --> 00:23:22,560
Very well.
573
00:23:22,600 --> 00:23:24,760
You were up all night
writing that speech.
574
00:23:24,800 --> 00:23:28,080
Yes, for John Stern to hear,
and he didn't even show up!
575
00:23:31,920 --> 00:23:34,240
Is that not him? Is that not him?!
576
00:23:37,560 --> 00:23:38,840
Mr Stern!
577
00:23:38,880 --> 00:23:40,640
So you saw the trial then?
578
00:23:40,680 --> 00:23:42,760
Sorry if you heard any of that.
579
00:23:42,800 --> 00:23:45,480
Truth be told, I've had a bit
of a fallow period,
580
00:23:45,520 --> 00:23:47,680
an annus calamitous,
if you like.
581
00:23:47,720 --> 00:23:49,000
I'm sure you've been there.
582
00:23:50,120 --> 00:23:52,640
Just saying,
I'm sure you've been there, John.
583
00:23:54,560 --> 00:23:56,120
In fact, I'll take that back.
584
00:23:56,160 --> 00:23:58,040
I'm not sure you've been there.
585
00:23:58,080 --> 00:24:00,760
In fact, I'm positive you haven't.
586
00:24:00,800 --> 00:24:02,880
And I know that you won't, John.
587
00:24:04,200 --> 00:24:05,920
Have I upset you, John?
588
00:24:05,960 --> 00:24:07,120
John?
589
00:24:08,640 --> 00:24:10,000
Oh, God!
590
00:24:10,040 --> 00:24:12,480
I think you've hurt yourself
a little bit, John.
591
00:24:12,520 --> 00:24:14,680
There are one or two flies
just near your mouth.
592
00:24:14,720 --> 00:24:16,120
Yup. One's gone in.
593
00:24:16,160 --> 00:24:17,840
It's gone into your mouth, John.
Gideon...
594
00:24:17,880 --> 00:24:20,120
It was on your lip, and then
it's just marched into your mouth,
595
00:24:20,160 --> 00:24:21,240
bold as brass.
596
00:24:21,280 --> 00:24:23,880
Gideon. Don't inhale, John.
Gideon, he's dead!
597
00:24:23,920 --> 00:24:25,640
He must have drunk all the ale,
598
00:24:25,680 --> 00:24:28,400
come in, slipped on the straw,
and then impaled himself on that...
599
00:24:28,440 --> 00:24:30,000
Oh, that metal thingy.
600
00:24:30,040 --> 00:24:33,720
What an idiot. What an idiot!
Showing off, probably!
601
00:24:33,760 --> 00:24:36,400
Well, someone's going to have
to tell the Witchfinder General
602
00:24:36,440 --> 00:24:38,320
he's going to need a new
right hand man.
603
00:24:38,360 --> 00:24:42,280
I mean, yes, although goodness knows
where Matthew Hopkins is.
604
00:24:42,320 --> 00:24:44,240
He's not an easy man to pin down.
605
00:24:44,280 --> 00:24:47,240
Well, it says here Mr Stern
is going to meet him in Chelmsford
606
00:24:47,280 --> 00:24:49,960
on Friday for a big
showpiece witch trial.
607
00:24:50,000 --> 00:24:51,160
Shame you're here.
608
00:24:51,200 --> 00:24:53,720
Well, there won't be a shortage
of qualified witchfinders
609
00:24:53,760 --> 00:24:54,840
far closer to hand.
610
00:24:54,880 --> 00:24:57,920
Yeah, but then again, they don't
know that Mr Stern's dead, do they?
611
00:24:57,960 --> 00:25:00,840
Or that Mr Hopkins
is headed for Chelmsford.
612
00:25:00,880 --> 00:25:02,880
You'd have been able
to break the news.
613
00:25:02,920 --> 00:25:04,800
You'd have been the first
witchfinder on the spot,
614
00:25:04,840 --> 00:25:06,960
with the witch
who killed his friend.
615
00:25:07,000 --> 00:25:08,840
I thought you said
he slipped on the hay.
616
00:25:08,880 --> 00:25:10,920
You told me,
617
00:25:10,960 --> 00:25:13,360
witches make puppets...
618
00:25:13,400 --> 00:25:15,640
..of the people
they want to bewitch!
619
00:25:15,680 --> 00:25:19,600
She made this to put a hex on him.
Look.
620
00:25:19,640 --> 00:25:23,000
I found it in her house.
It's a shame the trial's done.
621
00:25:23,040 --> 00:25:25,040
I don't think they'd take
too kindly to you
622
00:25:25,080 --> 00:25:28,240
whisking that witch away - they're
going to want to see her burn!
623
00:25:30,440 --> 00:25:31,600
Gideon?
624
00:25:33,000 --> 00:25:35,640
SHOUTING AND JEERING
Topcliffe!
625
00:25:35,680 --> 00:25:37,360
Magistrate Topcliffe!
626
00:25:38,840 --> 00:25:41,440
Excuse me, excuse me!
627
00:25:43,320 --> 00:25:45,880
Magistrate Topcliffe,
I need the suspect! What?!
628
00:25:45,920 --> 00:25:47,520
I've got to take the suspect!
629
00:25:47,560 --> 00:25:49,360
Why?! I've got a letter!
630
00:25:49,400 --> 00:25:50,960
What letter? This one!
631
00:25:51,000 --> 00:25:53,080
CROWD FALLS SILENT
632
00:25:53,120 --> 00:25:54,520
Received it just now.
633
00:25:55,760 --> 00:25:58,320
It's from the Court of Assizes
saying,
634
00:25:58,360 --> 00:26:00,320
and this is bloody annoying,
635
00:26:00,360 --> 00:26:04,160
I need to take the suspect there
636
00:26:04,200 --> 00:26:05,520
to have a trial there.
637
00:26:05,560 --> 00:26:07,080
What? No, no!
638
00:26:08,600 --> 00:26:10,720
The worst of it, I need
to take her immediately.
639
00:26:10,760 --> 00:26:12,240
What does it say?
640
00:26:12,280 --> 00:26:15,320
Actually, yeah.
Let's hear the letter.
641
00:26:15,360 --> 00:26:17,080
You want me to read the letter?
642
00:26:17,120 --> 00:26:18,160
Yes!
643
00:26:18,200 --> 00:26:19,520
Read it!
644
00:26:20,720 --> 00:26:22,440
I'll happily read the letter.
645
00:26:25,040 --> 00:26:26,320
It says...
646
00:26:26,360 --> 00:26:28,600
.."To Mr Bannister."
647
00:26:28,640 --> 00:26:30,400
Pardon me, a bit of phlegm.
648
00:26:31,560 --> 00:26:35,200
"You shall immediately please
transport the defendant,
649
00:26:35,240 --> 00:26:37,360
"Thomasine..."
650
00:26:37,400 --> 00:26:38,640
Gooch. Gooch.
651
00:26:38,680 --> 00:26:40,880
Which is what it says here
in black and white.
652
00:26:40,920 --> 00:26:42,880
"..to the Court of Assizes,
653
00:26:42,920 --> 00:26:46,800
"where she will be tried...by
a judge..."
654
00:26:48,240 --> 00:26:49,400
Obviously.
655
00:26:49,440 --> 00:26:53,920
"..that we may more swiftly
expunge the
656
00:26:53,960 --> 00:26:55,960
"pernicious shadow of witchery
657
00:26:56,000 --> 00:26:59,120
"that looms long
over this large land..."
658
00:27:00,720 --> 00:27:04,280
Which I thought was rather florid,
but still quite nicely phrased.
659
00:27:04,320 --> 00:27:08,200
All of the Ls -
"looms", "long", "large".
660
00:27:08,240 --> 00:27:10,440
You know what makes it florid?
661
00:27:10,480 --> 00:27:12,200
"Yours..." Wrapping it up now.
662
00:27:12,240 --> 00:27:19,720
"..the Master of the Rolls
and Lord Chancellor of the...Bar."
663
00:27:21,560 --> 00:27:22,760
There's your letter.
664
00:27:22,800 --> 00:27:24,600
I don't have any questions,
665
00:27:24,640 --> 00:27:26,200
unless you guys do?
666
00:27:26,240 --> 00:27:29,120
CROWD SHOUTS ANGRILY
79781
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