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00:00:04,533 --> 00:00:06,467
and may containmature subject matter.
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00:00:06,467 --> 00:00:13,967
Viewer discretionis advised.
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00:00:14,100 --> 00:00:17,033
- Hey, Ron, you need any help?
and may containmature subject matter.
4
00:00:17,166 --> 00:00:19,033
- Oh, I don't think so.
5
00:00:19,166 --> 00:00:20,333
I already bought the ice cream,
6
00:00:20,467 --> 00:00:21,867
and I certainly
don't need help eating it.
7
00:00:22,000 --> 00:00:23,266
[both chuckling]
8
00:00:23,400 --> 00:00:25,633
- I was, uh--
I was talking about all this.
9
00:00:25,767 --> 00:00:27,066
- Oh, that.
10
00:00:27,200 --> 00:00:29,700
Judy needed more space
for Rick's Bowflex,
11
00:00:29,834 --> 00:00:31,233
so we agreed to kick me out.
12
00:00:31,367 --> 00:00:32,433
It's for the best.
13
00:00:32,567 --> 00:00:34,200
I mean,
you can't beat the commute.
14
00:00:34,333 --> 00:00:37,467
[chuckling]
- Wait. You're living here?
15
00:00:37,600 --> 00:00:39,100
- What? No.
16
00:00:39,233 --> 00:00:41,400
That'd be against the law.
17
00:00:41,533 --> 00:00:43,900
And you would tell, right?
18
00:00:44,033 --> 00:00:46,233
- Let's pre-game at my place
before the ice cream social.
19
00:00:46,367 --> 00:00:47,633
Aisha, are you in?
20
00:00:47,767 --> 00:00:50,333
- Hell, yeah!
Wouldn't miss it, girl!
21
00:00:50,467 --> 00:00:52,433
- Oh, Yasmin,
we should go to bio.
22
00:00:52,567 --> 00:00:55,033
We're dissecting frogs,
and I'm gonna faint.
23
00:00:55,166 --> 00:00:56,266
[bell rings]
24
00:00:56,400 --> 00:00:58,333
- Bye! See you at the pre-game!
25
00:00:58,467 --> 00:00:59,734
- [imitating Aisha] Hell, yeah.
Wouldn't miss it girl.
26
00:00:59,867 --> 00:01:01,400
[giggles]
27
00:01:01,533 --> 00:01:03,934
- So what if I'm excited
to go to the ice cream social?
28
00:01:04,066 --> 00:01:05,400
If you think it's lame,
don't go.
29
00:01:05,533 --> 00:01:07,500
- I have to go
'cause of student council.
30
00:01:07,633 --> 00:01:09,834
You think I want to spend
my Friday night at school
31
00:01:09,967 --> 00:01:11,300
scooping ice cream?
32
00:01:11,433 --> 00:01:13,867
No, I want to try the new
decaffeinated tea I just got
33
00:01:14,000 --> 00:01:15,333
and fall asleep reading.
34
00:01:15,467 --> 00:01:17,500
- You are so judgmental
about Bayside.
35
00:01:17,633 --> 00:01:18,967
- [scoffs]
No, I'm not!
36
00:01:19,100 --> 00:01:22,166
There's plenty of Bayside stuff
I'm not judgmental about.
37
00:01:22,300 --> 00:01:25,266
- Like what?
38
00:01:25,400 --> 00:01:26,934
- These floors are clean.
39
00:01:27,066 --> 00:01:29,066
- Mm.
40
00:01:29,200 --> 00:01:30,934
- I guess the person of color
they underpaid to clean them
41
00:01:31,066 --> 00:01:32,266
did a great job.
- See?
42
00:01:32,400 --> 00:01:35,934
Yo, if you could make it one
week without hating on Bayside,
43
00:01:36,066 --> 00:01:38,233
I'll give you 50 bucks.
44
00:01:38,367 --> 00:01:39,767
Ooh, I've been hanging out
with too many rich kids.
45
00:01:39,900 --> 00:01:40,834
I'll give you 50 cents.
46
00:01:40,967 --> 00:01:41,967
- Deal.
- Deal.
47
00:01:42,100 --> 00:01:43,266
- Hey, ladies,
48
00:01:43,400 --> 00:01:45,333
I just met the hottest girl.
49
00:01:45,467 --> 00:01:48,333
Her name's Pamela,
and she's a perfect ten.
50
00:01:48,467 --> 00:01:50,834
I mean, blonde hair,
gorgeous smile,
51
00:01:50,967 --> 00:01:52,500
and she just had
really bad mono,
52
00:01:52,633 --> 00:01:54,500
so you know she does tongues.
- Mm.
53
00:01:54,633 --> 00:01:55,834
Wow, what do you think
about that, Daisy?
54
00:01:55,967 --> 00:01:58,734
- Yeah.
55
00:01:58,867 --> 00:01:59,600
- I think it's cool.
56
00:01:59,734 --> 00:02:01,266
Congratulations
on your new love.
57
00:02:01,400 --> 00:02:03,400
- Guys, I just met
the girl of my dreams.
58
00:02:03,533 --> 00:02:06,367
Blonde hair, killer smile,
recently sick.
59
00:02:06,500 --> 00:02:08,166
[record scratches]
- It's the same girl.
60
00:02:08,300 --> 00:02:09,700
- Wait, yo, J-Dog.
61
00:02:09,834 --> 00:02:11,367
You also met a hot blonde
this morning?
62
00:02:11,500 --> 00:02:14,567
- That's right.
- Do you think--
63
00:02:14,700 --> 00:02:16,767
both: We should both ask
our separate girls
64
00:02:16,900 --> 00:02:18,734
to the ice cream social
Friday night?
65
00:02:18,867 --> 00:02:21,300
- Yeah!
- Yes!
66
00:02:21,433 --> 00:02:23,033
[bell rings]
67
00:02:23,166 --> 00:02:24,734
♪ When I wake upin the mornin' ♪
68
00:02:24,867 --> 00:02:26,467
♪ Alarm gives out a warnin' ♪
69
00:02:26,600 --> 00:02:28,900
♪ I don't think I'll evermake it on time ♪
70
00:02:29,033 --> 00:02:30,567
♪ By the timeI grab my books ♪
71
00:02:30,700 --> 00:02:31,934
♪ And I give myself a look ♪
72
00:02:32,066 --> 00:02:35,433
♪ I'm at the corner,just in time ♪
73
00:02:35,567 --> 00:02:37,934
♪ It's all right,it's all right ♪
74
00:02:38,066 --> 00:02:39,200
♪ Saved by the bell ♪
75
00:02:39,333 --> 00:02:41,200
♪ It's all right,it's all right ♪
76
00:02:41,333 --> 00:02:42,800
♪ Saved by the bell ♪
77
00:02:42,934 --> 00:02:45,266
♪ It's all right ♪
78
00:02:45,400 --> 00:02:49,333
♪ 'Cause I'm savedby the bell ♪
79
00:02:49,467 --> 00:02:56,700
[bell rings]
80
00:02:59,033 --> 00:03:01,467
[ind- Hey, buddy!
Free seat over here.
81
00:03:02,500 --> 00:03:03,967
Let's do our secret handshake.
82
00:03:04,100 --> 00:03:05,734
- We don't have a secret--
- ♪ Whatever you do is right ♪
83
00:03:05,867 --> 00:03:07,066
♪ Whenever you stop,
it's done ♪
84
00:03:07,200 --> 00:03:08,400
That was horrible.
85
00:03:08,533 --> 00:03:10,767
- [clears throat]
Hello.
86
00:03:11,900 --> 00:03:14,433
Oh, my God!
Okay. Don't look now.
87
00:03:14,567 --> 00:03:17,200
My dream girl just walked in.
88
00:03:17,333 --> 00:03:19,200
[light music]
89
00:03:19,333 --> 00:03:20,934
- Whoa, wait, wait, wait, wait.
90
00:03:21,066 --> 00:03:23,300
My dream girl just walked in.
91
00:03:23,433 --> 00:03:24,667
- Yours?
- Uh-huh.
92
00:03:24,800 --> 00:03:26,166
- You know what this means?
[record scratches]
93
00:03:26,300 --> 00:03:27,500
- Thank God.
94
00:03:27,633 --> 00:03:29,867
both: Our future girlfriends
are best friends?
95
00:03:30,000 --> 00:03:31,967
- Dude! Come on!
96
00:03:32,100 --> 00:03:32,967
[record scratches]
97
00:03:33,100 --> 00:03:34,333
I honestly think
98
00:03:34,467 --> 00:03:37,667
she's going to be
the mother of my children.
99
00:03:37,800 --> 00:03:40,834
- Um, well...
100
00:03:40,967 --> 00:03:42,166
I guess maybe,
101
00:03:42,300 --> 00:03:43,500
but you can always adopt,
J-Dog.
102
00:03:43,633 --> 00:03:45,934
- Oh, I mean,
well, yeah, of course.
103
00:03:46,066 --> 00:03:47,233
- Yeah, man.
- Okay, kids.
104
00:03:47,367 --> 00:03:48,700
Settle down, please.
105
00:03:48,834 --> 00:03:50,567
- I know last-minute assemblies
are never good news,
106
00:03:50,700 --> 00:03:53,400
but this one is not
as bad as the last one.
107
00:03:53,533 --> 00:03:55,500
No one's parents
were lost at sea.
108
00:03:55,633 --> 00:03:58,100
- Have my parents been found?
109
00:03:58,233 --> 00:04:00,233
- Uh, no.
Listen, last night,
110
00:04:00,367 --> 00:04:02,033
the school's brand-new iPads
111
00:04:02,166 --> 00:04:05,233
were stolen
out of my room--office.
112
00:04:05,367 --> 00:04:06,734
And until they are returned,
113
00:04:06,867 --> 00:04:08,700
the ice cream social
is canceled.
114
00:04:08,834 --> 00:04:11,166
- Dude!
[students clamoring]
115
00:04:11,300 --> 00:04:12,900
- Hey! Hey!
116
00:04:13,033 --> 00:04:14,233
Sorry, guys.
117
00:04:14,367 --> 00:04:16,400
My house, my rules.
118
00:04:16,533 --> 00:04:18,934
And again,
it's not my house,
119
00:04:19,066 --> 00:04:21,367
because I don't live here.
120
00:04:21,500 --> 00:04:23,600
- We are launching a thorough
121
00:04:23,734 --> 00:04:26,200
and, more importantly,
ethical investigation.
122
00:04:26,333 --> 00:04:27,333
- That's right, Jessie.
123
00:04:27,467 --> 00:04:31,033
We're calling it the
"Snitches Get Riches" Program.
124
00:04:31,166 --> 00:04:35,266
- Um, I thought we said no more
disciplinary experiments
125
00:04:35,400 --> 00:04:37,567
without running them
by me first.
126
00:04:37,700 --> 00:04:40,033
- The "Snitches Get Riches"
Program
127
00:04:40,166 --> 00:04:42,033
is a tattle raffle,
128
00:04:42,166 --> 00:04:45,467
and great idea
that we all agree on.
129
00:04:45,600 --> 00:04:48,166
Now, if anybody thinks they
know who stole those iPads,
130
00:04:48,300 --> 00:04:49,967
just write their name down,
put it in here,
131
00:04:50,100 --> 00:04:51,734
and you just might win
132
00:04:51,867 --> 00:04:54,000
a Vizio LED smart TV
133
00:04:54,133 --> 00:04:56,633
with two years
of Geek Squad Protection.
134
00:04:56,767 --> 00:04:58,000
Are there any questions?
135
00:04:58,133 --> 00:04:59,934
Well,
I don't see any hands,
136
00:05:00,133 --> 00:05:01,934
so assembly dismissed.
137
00:05:02,066 --> 00:05:05,333
♪ ♪
138
00:05:05,467 --> 00:05:08,467
- Okay, somebody
throw it at him.
139
00:05:08,600 --> 00:05:10,100
- But he said don't.
140
00:05:10,233 --> 00:05:11,433
- [sighs]
141
00:05:15,233 --> 00:05:17,633
Really?
- It's, like, so messed up
142
00:05:17,767 --> 00:05:19,300
they canceled
the ice cream social.
143
00:05:19,433 --> 00:05:20,667
- Mm, yeah.
- [sighs] I just wish
144
00:05:20,800 --> 00:05:22,867
if someone knew who did it,
they'd come forward.
145
00:05:23,000 --> 00:05:24,667
You know, if, like, it was,
like, their cousin
146
00:05:24,800 --> 00:05:26,200
or their friend
from the bus
147
00:05:26,333 --> 00:05:28,934
or an opponent
from a rival dance crew.
148
00:05:29,066 --> 00:05:34,433
♪ ♪
149
00:05:34,567 --> 00:05:36,800
- Wait, do you think
I know who did it?
150
00:05:36,934 --> 00:05:39,467
[scoffing and laughing]
- Oh, my God. No, Aisha, no!
151
00:05:39,600 --> 00:05:41,800
I would never say that
out loud.
152
00:05:41,934 --> 00:05:44,033
- Okay. Just--just--
just throw it at him!
153
00:05:44,166 --> 00:05:46,100
Just go ahead and throw it!
154
00:05:46,233 --> 00:05:47,567
- Don't.
155
00:05:51,133 --> 00:05:56,033
♪ ♪
156
00:05:56,166 --> 00:05:57,300
- Do people keep asking you
157
00:05:57,433 --> 00:05:58,700
if you know
who stole all the iPads?
158
00:05:58,834 --> 00:05:59,700
- Yeah!
159
00:05:59,834 --> 00:06:01,834
They obviously think
a Douglas kid did it
160
00:06:01,967 --> 00:06:03,100
and we're covering it up.
161
00:06:03,233 --> 00:06:04,266
- How dare they all assume
162
00:06:04,400 --> 00:06:06,633
that we know
who stole the iPads.
163
00:06:06,767 --> 00:06:07,800
- I mean, it was DeVante,
right?
164
00:06:07,934 --> 00:06:09,867
We know he stole them.
- Oh, yeah. He's 100% guilty.
165
00:06:10,000 --> 00:06:11,967
- Like, we would
never tell on him, but--
166
00:06:12,100 --> 00:06:13,533
- Obviously!
[sighs]
167
00:06:13,667 --> 00:06:16,033
But he literally did
the same thing back at Douglas.
168
00:06:16,166 --> 00:06:17,266
Granted, those weren't iPads.
169
00:06:17,400 --> 00:06:19,000
They were RadioShack
Infotainment Squares.
170
00:06:19,133 --> 00:06:20,533
- Mm.
171
00:06:20,667 --> 00:06:22,333
But the Bayside kids don't
know that we know all that.
172
00:06:22,467 --> 00:06:24,166
[scoffs]
It's so unfair.
173
00:06:24,300 --> 00:06:25,700
Like, DeVante makes us
all look bad.
174
00:06:25,834 --> 00:06:27,367
Now I know
how pro basketball players
175
00:06:27,500 --> 00:06:28,700
who don't cheat
on their wives feel.
176
00:06:28,834 --> 00:06:30,467
- We've had this conversation
a million times.
177
00:06:30,600 --> 00:06:32,300
They all cheat.
178
00:06:32,433 --> 00:06:33,900
- Not Sue Bird.
- Don't say "not Sue Bird."
179
00:06:34,033 --> 00:06:35,133
- All right.
180
00:06:35,266 --> 00:06:38,133
She loves Megan.
That's all I'm saying.
181
00:06:38,266 --> 00:06:42,467
♪ ♪
182
00:06:42,600 --> 00:06:44,000
- You know what's weird?
183
00:06:44,133 --> 00:06:45,033
How we both met a girl
184
00:06:45,166 --> 00:06:47,400
and fell in love
on the same day.
185
00:06:47,533 --> 00:06:49,133
- Statistically,
it was bound to happen.
186
00:06:49,266 --> 00:06:50,367
- True.
187
00:06:50,500 --> 00:06:51,734
- I can't take it anymore.
188
00:06:51,867 --> 00:06:54,700
- Mm, I'd keep my judgmental
opinions to myself.
189
00:06:54,834 --> 00:06:57,533
Unless you hate having 50 cents
in your pocket.
190
00:06:57,667 --> 00:07:00,100
- I don't know what poor-o bet
you two are making,
191
00:07:00,233 --> 00:07:01,200
but Aisha's right.
192
00:07:01,333 --> 00:07:02,600
Bayside mating rituals
193
00:07:02,734 --> 00:07:04,934
are always more complicated
than they seem.
194
00:07:05,066 --> 00:07:07,400
Best to stay out of it
and let it run its course.
195
00:07:07,533 --> 00:07:09,033
- It's too bad
about the ice cream social.
196
00:07:09,166 --> 00:07:11,400
That was gonna be the perfect
date for me and Pamela.
197
00:07:11,533 --> 00:07:12,567
- Wait,
your girl's name is Pamela?
198
00:07:12,700 --> 00:07:14,033
That's my girl's name, too.
199
00:07:14,166 --> 00:07:15,800
- Wait, but that means--
200
00:07:17,333 --> 00:07:19,533
both: We only have to write
one Valentine's Day rap.
201
00:07:19,667 --> 00:07:21,066
- Yeah!
- Yes.
202
00:07:21,200 --> 00:07:25,000
[coins rattle on table]
- It's the same Pamela, idiots!
203
00:07:25,133 --> 00:07:26,233
- [scoffs]
Nuh-uh.
204
00:07:26,367 --> 00:07:28,834
- No, no, no,
My girl is like this.
205
00:07:28,967 --> 00:07:31,934
- Exactly. And my Pamela
is like this.
206
00:07:32,066 --> 00:07:33,567
- Uh-huh.
207
00:07:36,333 --> 00:07:38,200
both:
[gasp] No!
208
00:07:38,333 --> 00:07:40,700
- Hey, guys! Oh, since
the ice cream social is off,
209
00:07:40,834 --> 00:07:42,367
I'm having a party
on Friday night
210
00:07:42,500 --> 00:07:44,200
at my stepmom's stepmom's
Malibu beach house.
211
00:07:44,333 --> 00:07:45,967
So check your email
for invites.
212
00:07:46,100 --> 00:07:48,000
- I'm taking Pamela
to that party.
213
00:07:48,133 --> 00:07:49,934
- No. I'm taking Pamela
to that party.
214
00:07:50,066 --> 00:07:52,233
- Hey, look, there's a
perfectly reasonable way
215
00:07:52,367 --> 00:07:53,700
to settle this.
216
00:07:53,834 --> 00:07:57,600
A winner-take-all gentlemen's
prank war for her heart.
217
00:07:57,734 --> 00:08:01,400
- No.
- Hey, Jamie, are you okay?
218
00:08:01,533 --> 00:08:02,800
Or did some dumb bitch
ruin everything
219
00:08:02,934 --> 00:08:04,533
by opening
her dumb-bitch mouth?
220
00:08:04,667 --> 00:08:07,233
- Mac is so much better
at this stuff than me.
221
00:08:07,367 --> 00:08:08,467
You know,
one time he tricked me
222
00:08:08,600 --> 00:08:11,000
into falling in love with him
so he could steal my car.
223
00:08:11,133 --> 00:08:12,400
- Ah.
- [sighs]
224
00:08:12,533 --> 00:08:15,266
Damn, he looked good
driving that droptop.
225
00:08:15,400 --> 00:08:17,066
See? I still feel it.
226
00:08:17,200 --> 00:08:20,033
Hey, Pamela would be crazy
not to pick you.
227
00:08:20,166 --> 00:08:21,934
You're so hot and popular.
228
00:08:22,066 --> 00:08:22,834
You're like Justin Bieber
229
00:08:22,967 --> 00:08:25,300
if he wasn't, like,
100 years old.
230
00:08:25,433 --> 00:08:27,500
- Oh. Thank you, Lexi.
- Mm-hmm.
231
00:08:27,633 --> 00:08:31,033
[chuckling]
232
00:08:31,166 --> 00:08:33,066
Daisy,
when somebody who gets paid
233
00:08:33,200 --> 00:08:36,200
to sell Casper mattresses
on Instagram gives you advice,
234
00:08:36,333 --> 00:08:37,300
you listen.
235
00:08:37,433 --> 00:08:39,767
You should have stayed
out of this.
236
00:08:39,900 --> 00:08:42,767
- Hey, did you guys get
Yasmin's invite?
237
00:08:42,900 --> 00:08:44,266
- Mm, yeah. It's right here.
238
00:08:44,400 --> 00:08:46,000
- Oh.
[chuckles]
239
00:08:46,133 --> 00:08:48,800
Maybe mine went to spam.
240
00:08:48,934 --> 00:08:53,033
Is her email address
pumpit@penismasters.biz?
241
00:08:53,166 --> 00:08:57,133
- Ugh, how do I say this
in a nice way?
242
00:08:57,266 --> 00:09:00,233
She didn't invite you.
243
00:09:00,367 --> 00:09:03,700
But your shirt is good.
244
00:09:03,834 --> 00:09:05,367
- Let me guess.
245
00:09:05,500 --> 00:09:08,266
None of the Douglas kids
were invited.
246
00:09:08,400 --> 00:09:13,467
♪ ♪
247
00:09:13,600 --> 00:09:14,834
- Hey.
248
00:09:14,967 --> 00:09:17,166
I know what you did.
- No, thanks.
249
00:09:17,300 --> 00:09:18,567
- I know you stole those iPads,
250
00:09:18,700 --> 00:09:19,900
'cause you did the same thing
back at Douglas.
251
00:09:20,033 --> 00:09:21,867
- Those weren't iPads.
Those were garbage.
252
00:09:22,000 --> 00:09:22,900
They only had one app on them
253
00:09:23,033 --> 00:09:25,166
called "American Facebook,
not from Russia."
254
00:09:25,300 --> 00:09:26,333
They were very hard to sell.
255
00:09:26,467 --> 00:09:27,500
- Can you just do
the right thing for once
256
00:09:27,633 --> 00:09:28,667
and give them back?
257
00:09:28,800 --> 00:09:29,567
- Can you just
mind your business?
258
00:09:29,700 --> 00:09:30,967
- This is my business.
259
00:09:31,100 --> 00:09:33,200
You're making
all the Douglas kids look bad.
260
00:09:33,333 --> 00:09:35,867
I'm the freakin' quarterback
of the football team.
261
00:09:36,000 --> 00:09:37,033
I shouldn't be excluded
from parties
262
00:09:37,166 --> 00:09:38,633
'cause your ass don't--
- There it is.
263
00:09:38,767 --> 00:09:40,600
So this ain't about
doing the right thing,
264
00:09:40,734 --> 00:09:41,900
because if it was,
265
00:09:42,033 --> 00:09:43,700
you would've brought
this up back at Douglas.
266
00:09:43,834 --> 00:09:45,333
But you didn't.
267
00:09:45,467 --> 00:09:47,233
So I wonder
why you're bringing it up
268
00:09:47,367 --> 00:09:48,333
now that we go to Hogwarts.
269
00:09:48,467 --> 00:09:49,967
- No, that's not why,
270
00:09:50,100 --> 00:09:51,567
and don't try
to make it about that.
271
00:09:51,700 --> 00:09:52,834
- Yeah, see,
you only care about this
272
00:09:52,967 --> 00:09:54,000
'cause you don't want
to look bad
273
00:09:54,133 --> 00:09:55,533
in front of your
little white friends.
274
00:09:55,667 --> 00:09:57,033
- [scoffs]
275
00:09:57,166 --> 00:09:58,333
First of all, uh,
276
00:09:58,467 --> 00:10:00,834
Yasmin's dad is half-Persian.
277
00:10:00,967 --> 00:10:04,066
Look, you stole those iPads,
and that's wrong.
278
00:10:04,200 --> 00:10:05,700
- Yep.
279
00:10:05,834 --> 00:10:08,066
And I'm not giving them back.
280
00:10:08,200 --> 00:10:10,233
Now what?
281
00:10:10,367 --> 00:10:17,200
♪ ♪
282
00:10:25,467 --> 00:10:27,133
- Now this.
283
00:10:29,667 --> 00:10:30,934
This makes sense
if you just heard
284
00:10:31,066 --> 00:10:34,133
the end of my previous
conversation, okay?
285
00:10:38,667 --> 00:10:41,100
[bell rings]
286
00:10:41,233 --> 00:10:43,867
- Oh, hey, Jamie. Isn't,
uh, Pamela in this class?
287
00:10:44,000 --> 00:10:46,600
The object of our
gentlemen's prank war?
288
00:10:46,734 --> 00:10:49,100
- Is she? Hmm.
I hadn't realized.
289
00:10:49,233 --> 00:10:52,100
[door opens]
290
00:10:54,767 --> 00:10:57,300
[clears throat]
Hey, dude, um, no offense,
291
00:10:57,433 --> 00:11:00,600
but you smell
like hella dog poop.
292
00:11:02,166 --> 00:11:04,367
- Yeah, I should hope so.
293
00:11:04,500 --> 00:11:05,967
[whimpering]
294
00:11:06,100 --> 00:11:08,667
Oh, I've been volunteering
at an animal rescue.
295
00:11:08,800 --> 00:11:12,000
Hey, girl.
This is for you.
296
00:11:12,133 --> 00:11:13,166
- What?
297
00:11:13,300 --> 00:11:16,200
- So she's just going to
hold a dog all through class?
298
00:11:16,333 --> 00:11:18,100
[door opens]
299
00:11:18,233 --> 00:11:19,533
[bell rings]
300
00:11:19,667 --> 00:11:21,000
- [sighs]
301
00:11:21,133 --> 00:11:24,133
Okay, students,
dogs, take your seats.
302
00:11:24,266 --> 00:11:27,066
You have the whole class
to finish your quiz,
303
00:11:27,200 --> 00:11:28,300
because I need to finish
304
00:11:28,433 --> 00:11:30,200
writing an angry letter
to Tinder
305
00:11:30,333 --> 00:11:33,834
about the quality of the
responses I've been getting.
306
00:11:35,233 --> 00:11:39,700
- I have a delivery for
a "future Mrs. Pamela Spano."
307
00:11:39,834 --> 00:11:41,333
- Pretty romantic, huh?
308
00:11:41,467 --> 00:11:42,633
Wait till you hear the poem.
309
00:11:42,767 --> 00:11:44,800
- I've been instructed
to read this poem.
310
00:11:44,934 --> 00:11:47,400
- Um, can you not?
We're in the middle of a quiz.
311
00:11:47,533 --> 00:11:49,400
- [clears throat]
312
00:11:49,533 --> 00:11:52,033
"Roses are red,
violets are blue
313
00:11:52,166 --> 00:11:54,367
Jamie is married,
but Mac says--"
314
00:11:54,500 --> 00:11:57,133
- Hey, boo.
315
00:11:57,266 --> 00:11:59,066
- Damn it! How?
316
00:12:02,767 --> 00:12:06,300
- [whispering]
Psst! Daisy!
317
00:12:06,433 --> 00:12:08,133
Daisy!
318
00:12:08,266 --> 00:12:10,066
Switch seats with me
so I can sit next to Pamela.
319
00:12:10,200 --> 00:12:11,200
- No! Shh!
320
00:12:11,333 --> 00:12:14,100
- She's in the middle
of a quiz. Leave her alone!
321
00:12:14,233 --> 00:12:17,033
Daisy! Daisy!
322
00:12:17,166 --> 00:12:19,834
Switch seats with me
so I can sit next to Pamela!
323
00:12:19,967 --> 00:12:21,900
Please!
- Ugh! Fine, Jamie! Take it!
324
00:12:22,033 --> 00:12:25,033
Whatever will get you two
to shut up!
325
00:12:25,166 --> 00:12:27,000
- Hey.
326
00:12:27,133 --> 00:12:28,433
- Aw...
327
00:12:28,567 --> 00:12:30,433
I guess you won.
328
00:12:30,567 --> 00:12:31,567
Wait.
329
00:12:31,700 --> 00:12:33,033
[desk whirring]
330
00:12:33,166 --> 00:12:34,133
- Whoa!
331
00:12:34,266 --> 00:12:35,567
Dude, come on!
332
00:12:35,700 --> 00:12:37,633
Not fair!
- Mac, stop it!
333
00:12:37,767 --> 00:12:38,767
- Shh, shh.
- Daisy, be quiet.
334
00:12:38,900 --> 00:12:40,600
The other students are trying
to take their quiz.
335
00:12:40,734 --> 00:12:42,033
- [stammering]
336
00:12:44,133 --> 00:12:46,200
[Jamie groans]
337
00:12:46,333 --> 00:12:48,834
- Hey, beautiful.
Can I buy you a drink?
338
00:12:48,967 --> 00:12:51,166
- What's happening?
Is she doing it?
339
00:12:51,300 --> 00:12:54,400
Is he buying her a drink?
[desk whirring]
340
00:12:54,533 --> 00:12:57,033
- Hey, um, people are saying
341
00:12:57,166 --> 00:13:00,100
they saw you put a name
in the snitch box.
342
00:13:00,233 --> 00:13:01,000
- Maybe.
343
00:13:01,133 --> 00:13:04,233
Not that it's
any of your business.
344
00:13:04,367 --> 00:13:05,500
- So you're really going
to get me in trouble
345
00:13:05,633 --> 00:13:08,000
just 'cause you didn't get
invited to some dumb-ass party?
346
00:13:08,133 --> 00:13:10,266
- You did the wrong thing
and stole.
347
00:13:10,400 --> 00:13:12,133
So I did the right thing,
and I told on you.
348
00:13:12,266 --> 00:13:14,400
- Hmm. Mm. Okay.
349
00:13:14,533 --> 00:13:16,400
So 30 iPads.
350
00:13:16,533 --> 00:13:18,400
So that's a felony, right?
351
00:13:18,533 --> 00:13:20,734
Damn, I'm probably going to be
in jail for a couple years.
352
00:13:20,867 --> 00:13:22,700
Not ideal.
Not ideal at all.
353
00:13:22,834 --> 00:13:25,367
You know, 'cause both
of my parents are gone
354
00:13:25,500 --> 00:13:27,533
and I take care of my grandma.
355
00:13:27,667 --> 00:13:29,834
Oh, but you love
doing the right thing.
356
00:13:29,967 --> 00:13:31,066
So you'll step in.
357
00:13:31,200 --> 00:13:32,900
Yeah, you'll give her
her insulin shots
358
00:13:33,033 --> 00:13:35,066
and fill out
her Medicare paperwork.
359
00:13:35,200 --> 00:13:36,900
Pick up her teeth
when she throws them at the TV
360
00:13:37,033 --> 00:13:39,967
'cause someone tried
to lie to Judge Judy.
361
00:13:40,100 --> 00:13:41,767
You'll do
all those things, right?
362
00:13:41,900 --> 00:13:43,300
Cool. Thanks.
363
00:13:43,433 --> 00:13:47,834
♪ ♪
364
00:13:47,967 --> 00:13:50,967
- Bro, what you just did
in there was messed up.
365
00:13:51,100 --> 00:13:54,066
You know I love her, right?
- No, I love her!
366
00:13:54,200 --> 00:13:56,233
All I want to do is stare
at her blue or brown eyes!
367
00:13:56,367 --> 00:13:57,533
Eye?
368
00:13:57,667 --> 00:13:59,633
Eyes!
- Oh, my God!
369
00:13:59,767 --> 00:14:01,033
Neither of you love her!
370
00:14:01,166 --> 00:14:02,934
You haven't even
heard her speak!
371
00:14:03,066 --> 00:14:05,567
Can she?
You don't know.
372
00:14:05,700 --> 00:14:07,066
I'm ending this, now.
373
00:14:07,200 --> 00:14:09,900
- No, Daisy!
What are you doing?
374
00:14:12,633 --> 00:14:14,266
- Mac and Jamie both like you.
375
00:14:14,400 --> 00:14:17,433
Do you want to go to Yasmin's
party with either of them?
376
00:14:19,200 --> 00:14:20,767
- Great! Done.
- [chuckles]
377
00:14:20,900 --> 00:14:22,800
- This whole stupid thing
is over. Hurray!
378
00:14:22,934 --> 00:14:25,233
- Ha! I won!
379
00:14:25,367 --> 00:14:26,266
I won Pamela's heart!
380
00:14:26,400 --> 00:14:29,200
- [scoffs] I can't believe
you just did that!
381
00:14:29,333 --> 00:14:31,133
No one
in the history of Bayside
382
00:14:31,266 --> 00:14:34,600
has ever short-circuited
a gentlemen's prank war before.
383
00:14:34,734 --> 00:14:38,000
[scoffing]
384
00:14:38,133 --> 00:14:40,633
- Oh, sorry, I don't need
a romantic serenade anymore.
385
00:14:41,533 --> 00:14:45,734
Actually, can you play
"Bitch Better Have My Money"?
386
00:14:45,867 --> 00:14:49,233
[violin plays]
387
00:14:49,367 --> 00:14:51,533
- So you really snitchedon DeVante?
388
00:14:51,667 --> 00:14:54,200
- No. Do not try
to guilt-trip me.
389
00:14:54,333 --> 00:14:56,567
That sob story about his family
was probably made up.
390
00:14:56,700 --> 00:15:01,533
I bet his real grandma is,
like, rich and hella strong.
391
00:15:01,667 --> 00:15:05,667
- Do you think you're maybe
being kind of hard on him?
392
00:15:05,800 --> 00:15:06,934
He's still one of us.
393
00:15:07,066 --> 00:15:08,900
- [scoffs]
Why do people keep saying that?
394
00:15:09,033 --> 00:15:11,633
I'm not like him.
395
00:15:11,767 --> 00:15:13,066
- Do you remember
in middle school
396
00:15:13,200 --> 00:15:15,033
when you got your braids done
for class pictures
397
00:15:15,166 --> 00:15:16,600
and you wanted
to add pink hair?
398
00:15:16,734 --> 00:15:18,934
You didn't 'cause you thought
it looked too ghetto,
399
00:15:19,066 --> 00:15:20,400
but then our teacher,
Ms. Winston--
400
00:15:20,533 --> 00:15:21,633
- Freakin' Ms. Winston.
401
00:15:21,767 --> 00:15:23,633
[speaking Spanish]
402
00:15:23,767 --> 00:15:25,066
- Uh, right.
403
00:15:25,200 --> 00:15:27,533
She called your regular
404
00:15:27,667 --> 00:15:30,000
not-pink braids "ghetto"
anyway.
405
00:15:30,133 --> 00:15:33,500
Sometimes people are just...
Ms. Winstons.
406
00:15:33,633 --> 00:15:35,400
Some of the Bayside kids
are going to paint
407
00:15:35,533 --> 00:15:37,333
all the Douglas kids
with the same brush,
408
00:15:37,467 --> 00:15:38,867
no matter what we do.
409
00:15:39,000 --> 00:15:40,667
DeVante did a bad thing.
410
00:15:40,800 --> 00:15:41,934
But you're blaming him
411
00:15:42,066 --> 00:15:44,233
for how those other kids
are making you feel.
412
00:15:44,367 --> 00:15:47,033
♪ ♪
413
00:15:47,166 --> 00:15:50,400
- [crying]
Stop it, Lexi.
414
00:15:50,533 --> 00:15:52,600
[door opens]
Crying in a bathroom stall
415
00:15:52,734 --> 00:15:54,000
is so basic.
416
00:15:54,133 --> 00:15:55,633
[door closes]
[continues crying]
417
00:15:55,767 --> 00:15:57,633
- Lexi?
418
00:15:57,767 --> 00:15:59,100
Is that you?
419
00:15:59,233 --> 00:16:00,066
- You.
420
00:16:00,200 --> 00:16:01,567
You ruined everything
421
00:16:01,700 --> 00:16:04,367
in your JC Penney "stern frump"
collection sweater.
422
00:16:04,500 --> 00:16:06,066
- It's Kelly Clarkson
for Kohl's.
423
00:16:06,200 --> 00:16:07,533
- Did it ever occur to you
424
00:16:07,667 --> 00:16:09,500
that maybe I have complicated
feelings for Jamie
425
00:16:09,633 --> 00:16:12,133
and that all of Mac
and Jamie's little schemes
426
00:16:12,266 --> 00:16:14,600
to win Pamela's heart
existed within a larger scheme
427
00:16:14,734 --> 00:16:15,900
for me to win Jamie's?
428
00:16:16,033 --> 00:16:17,500
- How could that possibly
have occurred to me?
429
00:16:17,633 --> 00:16:20,600
- Okay. Let me
break it down for you.
430
00:16:20,734 --> 00:16:22,033
I like Jamie.
431
00:16:22,166 --> 00:16:24,100
And for the past 11 months,
I've been looking for
432
00:16:24,233 --> 00:16:25,867
the perfect opportunity
to tell him.
433
00:16:26,000 --> 00:16:27,900
And if you had just
minded your own business
434
00:16:28,033 --> 00:16:29,166
and let it run its course,
435
00:16:29,300 --> 00:16:30,900
Mac would have
won Pamela's heart,
436
00:16:31,033 --> 00:16:31,967
Jamie would have been
devastated,
437
00:16:32,100 --> 00:16:34,066
and I could've swooped in
and revealed my feelings
438
00:16:34,200 --> 00:16:35,500
at the romantic
ice cream social
439
00:16:35,633 --> 00:16:37,200
when Jamie was
at his most vulnerable.
440
00:16:37,333 --> 00:16:39,166
- I'm sorry,
I really want to hear this,
441
00:16:39,300 --> 00:16:41,266
but I do have to pee.
- Hold it.
442
00:16:41,400 --> 00:16:42,734
- Please...
- When you interfered
443
00:16:42,867 --> 00:16:44,300
and made Pamela choose
prematurely,
444
00:16:44,433 --> 00:16:46,233
it completely screwed up
my Lexi-con.
445
00:16:46,367 --> 00:16:49,433
"Lexi-cons" are what
I call my schemes.
446
00:16:49,567 --> 00:16:52,467
- Well, wouldn't it be easier
if you just ask him out?
447
00:16:52,600 --> 00:16:54,266
- You're so judgmental.
448
00:16:54,400 --> 00:16:56,367
[scoffs]
449
00:16:56,500 --> 00:17:03,467
♪ ♪
450
00:17:05,600 --> 00:17:07,500
- I think Ericstole the iPads.
451
00:17:07,633 --> 00:17:09,500
Maybe you should give usboth detention
452
00:17:09,633 --> 00:17:11,400
and lock usin the room together,
453
00:17:11,533 --> 00:17:13,934
and as punishment,we have to kiss 100 times.
454
00:17:14,066 --> 00:17:16,367
- I'm not sure who to tell,
455
00:17:16,500 --> 00:17:19,200
but I think Toddmanlives at the school now.
456
00:17:19,333 --> 00:17:21,800
I saw him walking aroundin a bathrobe
457
00:17:21,934 --> 00:17:23,600
holding a shower caddie.
458
00:17:23,734 --> 00:17:26,266
- Aisha?
What are you doing?
459
00:17:26,400 --> 00:17:28,367
Are you busting
into the snitch box?
460
00:17:28,500 --> 00:17:31,734
- Wait, why would you do
something like that, unless...
461
00:17:31,867 --> 00:17:33,633
[both groan]
462
00:17:33,767 --> 00:17:35,233
You stole the iPads.
463
00:17:41,667 --> 00:17:45,300
♪ ♪
464
00:17:45,433 --> 00:17:48,266
[indistinct whispering]
465
00:17:48,400 --> 00:17:51,533
- [whispering] She stole them.
- [whispering] That's her.
466
00:17:51,667 --> 00:17:54,066
- Stop whispering.
I can hear you.
467
00:17:54,200 --> 00:17:57,100
- Sorry, we have to whisper.
We're in the library.
468
00:17:57,233 --> 00:17:59,233
We think you're a thief.
469
00:17:59,367 --> 00:18:00,333
Sorry.
470
00:18:00,467 --> 00:18:01,767
- [sighs]
471
00:18:01,900 --> 00:18:03,834
This sucks.
Everyone thinks I did it.
472
00:18:03,967 --> 00:18:04,834
Like, any minute now,
473
00:18:04,967 --> 00:18:06,467
Toddman's going to call me
into his office,
474
00:18:06,600 --> 00:18:08,166
and everyone's
going to go, "Ooh!"
475
00:18:08,300 --> 00:18:10,000
And I'll be branded
the Bayside thief.
476
00:18:10,133 --> 00:18:12,667
- So what are you going to do?
- It doesn't matter.
477
00:18:12,800 --> 00:18:14,700
Now I know that no matter
how much I try
478
00:18:14,834 --> 00:18:17,000
to distance myself
from DeVante,
479
00:18:17,133 --> 00:18:19,266
these kids are always going
to think of us as the same.
480
00:18:19,400 --> 00:18:22,233
You were right. This school
is full of Ms. Winstons.
481
00:18:22,367 --> 00:18:24,367
Freakin' "Precious Moments"
collectin'-ass,
482
00:18:24,500 --> 00:18:26,100
Joann Fabrics lovin'-ass bitch.
483
00:18:26,233 --> 00:18:27,700
- Okay.
- [over PA] Aisha Garcia,
484
00:18:27,834 --> 00:18:29,300
to my office, please.
485
00:18:29,433 --> 00:18:31,100
- [scoffs]
Come on.
486
00:18:31,233 --> 00:18:32,667
[students oohing]
487
00:18:32,800 --> 00:18:34,834
Yeah, that's right. "Ooh!"
488
00:18:34,967 --> 00:18:37,600
I stole the iPads.
You got me.
489
00:18:40,133 --> 00:18:43,333
Nobody want's your lame-ass
JanSport, Mason!
490
00:18:43,467 --> 00:18:45,467
Yasmin literally
has a Fendi bag.
491
00:18:45,600 --> 00:18:47,266
I would obviously steal that.
492
00:18:47,400 --> 00:18:49,500
♪ ♪
493
00:18:49,633 --> 00:18:51,233
- We don't think you took
the iPads, Aisha,
494
00:18:51,367 --> 00:18:53,033
but we think
you might know who did.
495
00:18:53,166 --> 00:18:56,367
- Yeah, well, even if I did,
I wouldn't tell you.
496
00:18:56,500 --> 00:18:59,033
- Oh, that's a big problem.
497
00:18:59,166 --> 00:19:01,200
- I'm sorry, but I'm not going
to give the people here
498
00:19:01,333 --> 00:19:03,000
another reason to look at us
all like we're criminals.
499
00:19:03,133 --> 00:19:05,133
- No, the problem
I'm referring to
500
00:19:05,266 --> 00:19:07,867
is that I just found
the box of iPads
501
00:19:08,000 --> 00:19:10,533
right under my desk.
502
00:19:10,667 --> 00:19:13,734
They were shoved
behind this box of photos
503
00:19:13,867 --> 00:19:17,000
of me and Judy on vacation.
504
00:19:17,133 --> 00:19:20,033
- Wait,
so no one took the iPads?
505
00:19:20,166 --> 00:19:21,800
- Niagara Falls.
506
00:19:21,934 --> 00:19:25,000
God, she filled out
that rain poncho.
507
00:19:25,133 --> 00:19:27,433
Anyway,
all's well that ends well.
508
00:19:27,567 --> 00:19:30,000
What do you say we just keep
this between ourselves?
509
00:19:30,133 --> 00:19:31,700
- Ron!
- All right, I'll do it!
510
00:19:31,834 --> 00:19:32,934
I'll make an announcement.
511
00:19:33,066 --> 00:19:35,433
[P.A. clicks on]
Hey, everybody!
512
00:19:35,567 --> 00:19:38,734
So, uh...
513
00:19:38,867 --> 00:19:41,066
[dance music playing]
514
00:19:41,200 --> 00:19:47,900
♪ ♪
515
00:19:48,033 --> 00:19:50,834
[indistinct chatter]
516
00:19:55,934 --> 00:19:57,567
- Where's
your girlfriend, loser?
517
00:19:57,700 --> 00:19:58,934
- Where's your girlfriend?
518
00:19:59,066 --> 00:20:01,233
Oh, wait, that's right.
She doesn't exist.
519
00:20:01,367 --> 00:20:03,533
Just like Santa...
I found out recently.
520
00:20:03,667 --> 00:20:05,000
- Hey, first off,
Santa is real, bro.
521
00:20:05,133 --> 00:20:06,533
He exists in the hearts
of all who believe.
522
00:20:06,667 --> 00:20:09,266
- Yeah.
- And second off, this...
523
00:20:09,400 --> 00:20:10,367
- [gasps]
524
00:20:10,500 --> 00:20:13,233
- [scoffs] Jokes on you.
My penis was hot anyways.
525
00:20:13,367 --> 00:20:14,333
- Oh.
526
00:20:16,033 --> 00:20:18,800
[students clamoring]
527
00:20:24,333 --> 00:20:26,033
- Hey! Hey!
528
00:20:27,700 --> 00:20:31,367
Hey, knock it off!
My office, now!
529
00:20:32,900 --> 00:20:35,300
Okay, I've seen this before.
530
00:20:35,433 --> 00:20:39,767
This whole competition
isn't over a girl at all.
531
00:20:39,900 --> 00:20:42,000
You're both just trying
to one-up each other
532
00:20:42,133 --> 00:20:43,834
and prove you're
the big man on campus.
533
00:20:43,967 --> 00:20:46,333
They call it...
534
00:20:46,467 --> 00:20:47,834
toxic masculinity.
535
00:20:47,967 --> 00:20:49,900
Forget about this stupid fight.
536
00:20:50,033 --> 00:20:52,767
Your friendship--
that's what really matters.
537
00:20:52,900 --> 00:20:54,100
- What friendship?
- Too far!
538
00:20:54,233 --> 00:20:56,433
- Hey! Hey!
Come on, guys.
539
00:20:56,567 --> 00:20:57,767
Look, when I was
in high school,
540
00:20:57,900 --> 00:21:00,133
I constantly used to fight
with my best friend
541
00:21:00,266 --> 00:21:01,200
over a hot girl.
542
00:21:01,333 --> 00:21:02,633
[chuckles]
543
00:21:02,767 --> 00:21:04,633
Oh, it was actually your dad.
544
00:21:04,767 --> 00:21:06,333
Over your mom!
545
00:21:06,467 --> 00:21:07,467
Anyway, look.
546
00:21:07,600 --> 00:21:09,834
Then I just found another girl
that I really liked,
547
00:21:09,967 --> 00:21:12,600
and I started hooking up
with her instead.
548
00:21:12,734 --> 00:21:14,433
Wait, that was your mom.
549
00:21:14,567 --> 00:21:17,467
Anyway, look,
what I'm trying to say here is,
550
00:21:17,600 --> 00:21:19,467
girls, they come and go.
551
00:21:19,600 --> 00:21:22,767
The only thing that really
matters here is friendship.
552
00:21:22,900 --> 00:21:24,300
Now, that is forever.
553
00:21:24,433 --> 00:21:26,500
- But you don't even talk
to my dad anymore.
554
00:21:26,633 --> 00:21:29,066
And I know that 'cause my mom
was sending out Christmas cards
555
00:21:29,200 --> 00:21:31,000
and she goes,
"Should I send one to Slater?"
556
00:21:31,133 --> 00:21:34,300
And he goes, "Nah,
I don't talk to him anymore."
557
00:21:34,433 --> 00:21:36,367
- It would have been nice
to get one of those.
558
00:21:36,500 --> 00:21:38,166
Got a cool collection
of fridge magnets.
559
00:21:38,300 --> 00:21:39,300
Nothing to hang.
560
00:21:39,433 --> 00:21:42,166
- And you keep saying
that none of this matters,
561
00:21:42,300 --> 00:21:45,000
but according to your story,
it totally mattered.
562
00:21:45,133 --> 00:21:48,033
Like, Mac's dad winning
that battle was probably
563
00:21:48,166 --> 00:21:50,000
one of the most important
things he ever did.
564
00:21:50,133 --> 00:21:51,934
- Yeah, if he didn't win,
I wouldn't exist.
565
00:21:52,066 --> 00:21:54,467
- Oh, my God. That's true.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa.
566
00:21:54,600 --> 00:21:56,767
So the girl we fight over now
567
00:21:56,900 --> 00:21:58,967
could end up
being our future wife?
568
00:21:59,100 --> 00:22:01,900
When I think about it
like that, I mean...
569
00:22:02,033 --> 00:22:05,233
I just know that Pamela
is not the one for me.
570
00:22:05,367 --> 00:22:07,066
- Me either.
- Best friends again?
571
00:22:07,200 --> 00:22:09,567
- Yeah. Until there's another
girl we're both attracted to.
572
00:22:09,700 --> 00:22:11,567
- Great!
- Sweet!
573
00:22:11,700 --> 00:22:13,533
Thanks, Coach.
574
00:22:13,667 --> 00:22:14,633
- Yeah.
[sniffles]
575
00:22:14,767 --> 00:22:16,600
[clears throat]
Really glad we had this talk.
576
00:22:16,734 --> 00:22:17,934
- Yeah.
- I appreciate it.
577
00:22:18,066 --> 00:22:19,300
- Me too. Do you feel better?
- I feel great.
578
00:22:19,433 --> 00:22:21,233
- Me too. Good.
579
00:22:21,367 --> 00:22:23,333
- [gasps]
- In a moment of weakness,
580
00:22:23,467 --> 00:22:26,500
I confided in you
some very valuable information,
581
00:22:26,633 --> 00:22:28,367
and I need to know what you're
planning on doing with it.
582
00:22:28,500 --> 00:22:30,300
- What? The Jamie thing?
583
00:22:30,433 --> 00:22:32,467
- Shh!
584
00:22:32,600 --> 00:22:34,900
What are you going to do,
you sick bitch?
585
00:22:35,033 --> 00:22:37,033
Extort me?
Sell it to Harvey Levin?
586
00:22:37,166 --> 00:22:39,400
He won't print it.
He's my godfather.
587
00:22:39,533 --> 00:22:42,867
- No! Lexi, I'm sorry
I messed up your plan.
588
00:22:43,000 --> 00:22:45,300
And I promise you,
I will never tell anyone.
589
00:22:45,433 --> 00:22:48,867
- Oh, my God.
I believe you.
590
00:22:49,000 --> 00:22:51,667
- So no one else knows
about this?
591
00:22:51,800 --> 00:22:53,967
- Absolutely not.
592
00:22:54,100 --> 00:22:56,967
Okay, having a crush
is pathetic and relatable.
593
00:22:57,100 --> 00:22:58,166
I don't want people knowing
594
00:22:58,300 --> 00:22:59,600
there's something I want
that I can't have.
595
00:22:59,734 --> 00:23:00,934
- Okay, and sorry.
596
00:23:01,066 --> 00:23:02,500
W-why do you think
you can't have it?
597
00:23:02,633 --> 00:23:03,734
- It's complicated.
598
00:23:03,867 --> 00:23:05,433
Look, Jamie and I
have been friends forever.
599
00:23:05,567 --> 00:23:07,033
We grew up next door
to each other.
600
00:23:07,166 --> 00:23:09,400
I guess it's so scary. I mean,
like, what if I tell him
601
00:23:09,533 --> 00:23:10,433
and things get weird
602
00:23:10,567 --> 00:23:12,200
and he doesn't want
to be my friend anymore?
603
00:23:12,333 --> 00:23:14,100
Then who am I going to wave
good night to every night?
604
00:23:14,233 --> 00:23:15,767
Our other neighbor
is Simon Cowell,
605
00:23:15,900 --> 00:23:19,200
and I promised myself
I would never return his wave.
606
00:23:19,333 --> 00:23:20,767
- Wow, I--
607
00:23:20,900 --> 00:23:23,467
I had no idea you had
all this going on.
608
00:23:23,600 --> 00:23:24,867
- Yeah.
609
00:23:25,000 --> 00:23:26,467
- I'm sorry
I've been so judgmental.
610
00:23:26,600 --> 00:23:30,233
- It's okay. I was judging
your T-zone this whole time.
611
00:23:30,367 --> 00:23:33,000
Touching it will
only make it worse.
612
00:23:33,133 --> 00:23:36,233
♪ ♪
613
00:23:36,367 --> 00:23:38,934
[dog barking, siren wailing]
614
00:23:39,066 --> 00:23:42,700
♪ ♪
615
00:23:42,834 --> 00:23:44,433
- DeVante!
616
00:23:44,567 --> 00:23:45,900
Yo!
617
00:23:46,033 --> 00:23:47,233
Hey, I'm sorry, but I--
- Yo, shh!
618
00:23:47,367 --> 00:23:49,467
I know I shouldn't be here and
I know that you're mad at me,
619
00:23:49,600 --> 00:23:52,266
but I'm Ms. Winston.
620
00:23:52,400 --> 00:23:55,000
I was afraid of what all the
Ms. Winstons thought about me,
621
00:23:55,133 --> 00:23:57,967
but I was Ms. Winston
the whole time.
622
00:23:58,100 --> 00:24:00,266
- No, thanks.
- Uh, you were right.
623
00:24:00,400 --> 00:24:03,233
I only told on you 'cause
I thought you made me look bad.
624
00:24:03,367 --> 00:24:04,800
And I'm sorry for that.
625
00:24:04,934 --> 00:24:07,600
But I'm even more sorry
that it never occurred to me
626
00:24:07,734 --> 00:24:09,500
that you didn't do it.
627
00:24:09,633 --> 00:24:12,400
I had this idea in my head
about who you are.
628
00:24:12,533 --> 00:24:14,033
- Why?
629
00:24:14,166 --> 00:24:15,333
'Cause I stole that UPS truck
630
00:24:15,467 --> 00:24:16,533
and sold all
the packages in it?
631
00:24:16,667 --> 00:24:19,166
Or 'cause I jacked that Rascal
scooter outside of Target
632
00:24:19,300 --> 00:24:21,400
and took it
for a very slow joyride?
633
00:24:21,533 --> 00:24:24,266
- And because the other day,
you literally said, "I did it."
634
00:24:24,400 --> 00:24:26,400
[chuckles]
635
00:24:26,533 --> 00:24:28,367
Which I get now.
636
00:24:28,500 --> 00:24:32,200
- Look, I did some bad stuff
at Douglas.
637
00:24:32,333 --> 00:24:34,300
But you wanted a fresh start
at Bayside,
638
00:24:34,433 --> 00:24:37,934
and you never stopped to think
that maybe I wanted one, too.
639
00:24:38,066 --> 00:24:40,667
- I'm really sorry.
640
00:24:40,800 --> 00:24:43,133
Do you forgive me?
641
00:24:43,266 --> 00:24:45,667
- Only if you promise to
never come to my house again.
642
00:24:45,800 --> 00:24:47,333
[both chuckle]
643
00:24:47,467 --> 00:24:49,500
Come on, man.
Get out of here.
644
00:24:49,633 --> 00:24:51,800
- Oh, and, um, all that stuff
you said about your grandma
645
00:24:51,934 --> 00:24:54,333
and her medication and
you needing to help her, like--
646
00:24:54,467 --> 00:24:56,567
- Aw, yeah, I made all that up
just to make you feel bad.
647
00:24:56,700 --> 00:24:57,834
- Yeah, I thought so.
648
00:24:57,967 --> 00:24:59,834
Okay, well, I'ma just...
649
00:24:59,967 --> 00:25:02,400
- DeVante, I need my shot!
650
00:25:02,533 --> 00:25:04,433
And come pick up my teeth!
651
00:25:04,567 --> 00:25:06,667
Judge Judy caught
this man in a lie,
652
00:25:06,800 --> 00:25:09,100
talking about he don't know
who cut the tree down.
653
00:25:09,233 --> 00:25:11,133
He knows!
- [chuckles]
654
00:25:11,266 --> 00:25:13,567
You better go.
- Yeah, no. She's really scary.
655
00:25:13,700 --> 00:25:16,333
- [chuckles]
47753
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