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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:10,700 --> 00:00:14,700 I just hope it doesn't cause any permanent damage. 2 00:00:20,100 --> 00:00:24,300 - How long have you been here? - A while. 3 00:00:26,200 --> 00:00:29,000 - You missed your prom? - Yeah. 4 00:00:35,000 --> 00:00:38,400 The thing is, when I made that bet... 5 00:00:39,000 --> 00:00:43,100 There he is. It's Freddie. He's wearing a tux. 6 00:00:43,300 --> 00:00:45,900 - What's up? - Yes. 7 00:00:46,100 --> 00:00:47,900 I met a whole other person inside of you. 8 00:00:48,100 --> 00:00:50,500 - Inside both of us. - Shut up. 9 00:00:50,700 --> 00:00:53,000 I would've never found that person inside of me... 10 00:00:53,200 --> 00:00:55,400 ...if it weren't for the person inside of you. 11 00:00:55,600 --> 00:00:57,600 That's sweet. 12 00:00:57,800 --> 00:00:59,500 The whole other person inside of me... 13 00:00:59,700 --> 00:01:03,200 ...thinks that the whole other person inside of you has come a long way. 14 00:01:03,400 --> 00:01:07,200 So would the whole other person inside of you like to dance? 15 00:01:41,300 --> 00:01:43,000 Yes. 16 00:01:44,100 --> 00:01:46,500 - Morning, sweetie! - Daddy! 17 00:01:46,900 --> 00:01:49,600 - Why are you in here? - Why am I in here? 18 00:01:49,900 --> 00:01:51,800 It's her birthday, Dad. 19 00:01:52,000 --> 00:01:54,600 Happy birthday, sweetie. 20 00:01:57,900 --> 00:02:02,100 - What's that buzzing sound? - I just need a minute here. 21 00:02:02,400 --> 00:02:04,300 Maybe it's that construction. 22 00:02:04,600 --> 00:02:06,800 Where's my little angel? 23 00:02:07,000 --> 00:02:08,600 Happy birthday, honey. 24 00:02:08,800 --> 00:02:11,700 Grandma? Grandpa? Rosco! 25 00:02:15,000 --> 00:02:17,000 Rosco, go. 26 00:02:17,800 --> 00:02:19,900 - Hello. - Father O'Flannagan? 27 00:02:20,100 --> 00:02:23,200 I brought your special friends from the centre! 28 00:02:23,400 --> 00:02:26,100 - Happy birthday! - Janey's making faces. 29 00:02:26,300 --> 00:02:27,900 It smells in here. 30 00:02:28,100 --> 00:02:30,000 Okay, make a wish, dear. 31 00:02:31,000 --> 00:02:32,800 No. 32 00:02:55,900 --> 00:02:58,300 This is not your typical high school. 33 00:02:58,600 --> 00:03:03,200 At John Hughes, there are no cliques, no exclusive social groups. 34 00:03:03,400 --> 00:03:06,800 You're accepted for you, not who you hang out with. 35 00:03:07,100 --> 00:03:11,200 We'll divide into groups so you can get to know your peers. 36 00:03:11,500 --> 00:03:14,700 Let's get all you jocks in one group... 37 00:03:15,000 --> 00:03:18,500 ...and get you slutty girls over here by me. 38 00:03:18,700 --> 00:03:20,900 Hey, how you doing? Welcome. 39 00:03:21,200 --> 00:03:24,000 You losers should hang out in the back. 40 00:03:24,200 --> 00:03:27,700 That clearly includes you. Come on, get back there. 41 00:03:28,000 --> 00:03:30,700 Take a look at the kid standing beside you. 42 00:03:33,000 --> 00:03:36,000 They're your only friends for the next four years. 43 00:03:36,200 --> 00:03:38,500 Okay, let's move it, people! 44 00:03:49,200 --> 00:03:52,800 - You need to start dating. - I don't date. You know that. 45 00:03:53,000 --> 00:03:54,800 Janey, you know Dad's rule. 46 00:03:55,100 --> 00:03:56,900 I can't have sex before you. 47 00:03:57,200 --> 00:04:00,300 I don't conform to typical high-school norms. 48 00:04:00,600 --> 00:04:04,900 I read Sylvia Plath, listen to Bikini Kill and eat tofu. 49 00:04:05,200 --> 00:04:08,600 - I'm a unique rebel. - More like you're a lesbo. 50 00:04:08,800 --> 00:04:11,200 Mitch, leave your sister alone. 51 00:04:11,500 --> 00:04:12,900 Thank you, Daddy. 52 00:04:13,100 --> 00:04:17,400 If Janey wants to be a rug-muncher, that's her decision. 53 00:04:19,500 --> 00:04:21,800 Go! Fight! Win! 54 00:04:24,100 --> 00:04:25,700 All right! 55 00:04:27,800 --> 00:04:30,300 Nice combination, Crissy! 56 00:04:35,300 --> 00:04:38,300 I've been meaning to get that fixed. 57 00:04:38,700 --> 00:04:40,300 Later, Dad. 58 00:04:40,800 --> 00:04:42,200 Hey. 59 00:04:42,400 --> 00:04:44,600 I'll be late to pick you up. 60 00:04:44,800 --> 00:04:46,800 Why? A job interview? 61 00:04:47,000 --> 00:04:50,400 No, honey. I'll probably just be way too drunk. 62 00:04:50,700 --> 00:04:53,200 That's good. No drinking and driving. 63 00:04:53,400 --> 00:04:57,300 Oh, I'll be driving. I'll just be too drunk to remember. 64 00:04:57,900 --> 00:05:00,000 Okay. Bye, Daddy. 65 00:05:00,600 --> 00:05:02,300 Bye, pumpkin-head. 66 00:05:08,100 --> 00:05:10,300 - Oh, my God! - Get out of the road! 67 00:05:28,600 --> 00:05:31,600 Oh, my God, it's Jake. 68 00:05:32,300 --> 00:05:34,900 - Hi, stud. - Hi, Jake. 69 00:05:35,100 --> 00:05:39,000 - I love that thing with his eyebrows. - Those sideburns. 70 00:05:39,200 --> 00:05:43,300 Oh, my God, there's Jake. He's so popular. 71 00:05:43,900 --> 00:05:45,400 He just looked at me. 72 00:05:45,600 --> 00:05:48,300 - Here. You can keep it. - Tiff. 73 00:05:48,500 --> 00:05:51,200 Hi, Jake. It's all wet. 74 00:05:51,600 --> 00:05:53,200 Melanie. 75 00:05:53,400 --> 00:05:55,500 Hey, Jake. 76 00:05:55,700 --> 00:05:57,900 Hey, Arthur. 77 00:06:05,700 --> 00:06:08,700 Here's Ricky! 78 00:06:09,000 --> 00:06:11,000 Hey, Ricky. How was your weekend? 79 00:06:12,000 --> 00:06:15,800 Friday night I stood outside your window in the rain... 80 00:06:16,100 --> 00:06:17,600 ...screaming your name. 81 00:06:18,300 --> 00:06:22,000 Then I spent Saturday and Sunday making you this great... 82 00:06:22,200 --> 00:06:26,500 ...I've-been-desperately-trying- to-tell-you-that... 83 00:06:26,700 --> 00:06:29,000 ...I'm-madly-in-love-with-you... 84 00:06:29,200 --> 00:06:31,300 ...mix tape for your birthday. 85 00:06:31,500 --> 00:06:34,800 A mix tape? That's so sweet, Ricky. 86 00:06:36,300 --> 00:06:38,300 See you in English. 87 00:06:41,400 --> 00:06:43,500 Catch you guy later. 88 00:06:46,300 --> 00:06:48,200 What happening? 89 00:06:48,400 --> 00:06:51,900 Damn, Shorty, Dog is pretending to be Asian and shit. 90 00:06:52,100 --> 00:06:56,900 That cracker is white! Can't he see that, yo? 91 00:06:57,100 --> 00:06:59,800 Did you get any action this weekend? 92 00:07:00,100 --> 00:07:03,600 - I visit grandfather. - I played with my sisters. 93 00:07:03,900 --> 00:07:05,200 We're pathetic. 94 00:07:05,400 --> 00:07:09,100 How will we ever lose our virginity by graduation? 95 00:07:09,400 --> 00:07:12,000 - We're freshmen. - What's with the attitude? 96 00:07:12,300 --> 00:07:15,900 - Not easy to get lucky here. - Girls are sensitive. 97 00:07:16,100 --> 00:07:20,200 They're not looking for sex. They're looking for love. 98 00:07:20,500 --> 00:07:22,900 Fuck me! Harder! 99 00:07:30,000 --> 00:07:32,200 Amanda Becker. 100 00:07:33,000 --> 00:07:36,600 She is so perfect. 101 00:07:46,500 --> 00:07:47,800 Keep dreaming. 102 00:07:48,600 --> 00:07:50,400 What's up, Reggie Ray? 103 00:07:50,600 --> 00:07:53,200 I can't wait until Friday's game. 104 00:07:53,400 --> 00:07:57,400 What about your head? You have a blood clot the size of a grapefruit. 105 00:07:57,600 --> 00:08:01,600 Five more concussions and you'll die. You should take it easy. 106 00:08:02,200 --> 00:08:05,400 - Don't listen to him. - Austin. 107 00:08:05,700 --> 00:08:10,400 Mr. Not-First-String-Anymore isn't first-string anymore. 108 00:08:12,400 --> 00:08:15,200 We know what happened last time Jake called the plays. 109 00:08:15,400 --> 00:08:18,300 And now, our hometown hero... 110 00:08:18,500 --> 00:08:22,100 ...first-string quarterback, Jake Wyler! 111 00:08:22,300 --> 00:08:25,800 Malik, could you hold these books? 112 00:08:26,000 --> 00:08:28,800 Sure. Why not? I am the token black guy. 113 00:08:29,000 --> 00:08:31,400 I smile, stay out of the conversation... 114 00:08:31,600 --> 00:08:37,100 ...and say things like, " Damn," "Shit," and, "That is wack!" 115 00:08:53,800 --> 00:08:57,600 What's she doing here? She graduated four years ago. 116 00:08:59,300 --> 00:09:01,300 - Hi, Jake. - Catherine. 117 00:09:01,500 --> 00:09:03,100 Can I ask you a question? 118 00:09:03,300 --> 00:09:06,600 Why is it when I tell a guy to put it anywhere... 119 00:09:06,800 --> 00:09:09,800 - ...they always stick it in my ass? - Damn! 120 00:09:10,100 --> 00:09:12,100 Way too much information. 121 00:09:12,400 --> 00:09:16,700 Oh, no. Too much information would be telling you... 122 00:09:17,000 --> 00:09:19,900 ...that after they're done I take a huge dump. 123 00:09:20,200 --> 00:09:22,100 Shit! 124 00:09:23,700 --> 00:09:25,000 On their chest. 125 00:09:25,400 --> 00:09:27,800 Oh, that is wack! 126 00:09:43,400 --> 00:09:46,600 Why do hot girls always walk in slow motion? 127 00:09:52,900 --> 00:09:55,200 Priscilla, there you are. 128 00:09:55,400 --> 00:09:59,000 Jake, I need some T-to-the-fourth-power-Y. 129 00:10:00,300 --> 00:10:03,200 Some time to talk to you. 130 00:10:05,400 --> 00:10:07,500 God. 131 00:10:08,200 --> 00:10:11,100 It made sense to me, Priscilla. 132 00:10:22,600 --> 00:10:24,900 You're leaving me for this guy? 133 00:10:25,200 --> 00:10:28,800 I'm sorry, Jake. We met over spring break. 134 00:10:32,100 --> 00:10:34,800 I'm not ordinary. 135 00:10:35,000 --> 00:10:37,500 You're leaving me for this guy? 136 00:10:37,700 --> 00:10:39,700 His name is Les... 137 00:10:39,900 --> 00:10:44,500 ...and he's the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. 138 00:10:46,400 --> 00:10:48,200 And so is his bag. 139 00:11:18,500 --> 00:11:23,500 Janey Briggs, please report to the office. 140 00:11:26,700 --> 00:11:29,700 Being a foreign-exchange student is scary... 141 00:11:29,900 --> 00:11:32,600 ...adjusting to a new school, a new country. 142 00:11:32,900 --> 00:11:36,500 But you'll find that the students are very accepting. 143 00:11:41,300 --> 00:11:43,700 You have a sunny disposition. 144 00:11:56,500 --> 00:11:59,000 Well, isn't that wonderful? 145 00:11:59,200 --> 00:12:00,500 Janey, come in. 146 00:12:00,800 --> 00:12:04,200 This is Areola, our foreign-exchange student. 147 00:12:04,400 --> 00:12:07,300 Janey will show you to your first class. 148 00:12:08,400 --> 00:12:10,000 Hi. 149 00:12:15,900 --> 00:12:18,800 - I like your backpack. - Grazie. 150 00:12:23,000 --> 00:12:27,700 Dude, I heard there's an undercover reporter posing as a student. 151 00:12:27,900 --> 00:12:29,900 Dude, no way, dude. 152 00:12:30,200 --> 00:12:33,800 Do you know where Mr. Keller's English class is? 153 00:12:34,000 --> 00:12:37,400 - Down the hall, on your left. - Sweet, dude. 154 00:12:38,100 --> 00:12:42,000 For the thousandth time, I said, "Swallow that thing." 155 00:12:42,200 --> 00:12:44,000 Am I right? 156 00:12:47,900 --> 00:12:51,500 How could Priscilla dump me, Jake Wyler? 157 00:12:51,800 --> 00:12:53,700 Who does she think she is? 158 00:12:54,000 --> 00:12:56,200 I got two words for you, Jake: 159 00:12:56,500 --> 00:13:00,000 Prom queen, material. 160 00:13:00,800 --> 00:13:03,100 Austin, she's an illusion. 161 00:13:03,300 --> 00:13:06,600 You take away the makeup, the clothes... 162 00:13:06,800 --> 00:13:10,700 ...the way she wears her hair, the smell of her perfume... 163 00:13:10,900 --> 00:13:15,000 ...that cute face she makes when she's tonguing my balls... 164 00:13:16,900 --> 00:13:18,700 Look, she's replaceable. 165 00:13:18,900 --> 00:13:22,100 Given the right look, the right boyfriend... 166 00:13:22,300 --> 00:13:25,700 - ...any girl could be prom queen. - I smell a bet. 167 00:13:26,000 --> 00:13:28,600 Jakey, Jakey, about to make a big... 168 00:13:28,900 --> 00:13:31,000 ...mistakey. 169 00:13:31,200 --> 00:13:34,700 Here's the wager: I'll pick the most hopeless girl at this school... 170 00:13:34,900 --> 00:13:38,300 ...and I'll bet that you can't turn her into prom queen. 171 00:13:38,500 --> 00:13:40,400 You're on, Austin. 172 00:13:40,600 --> 00:13:42,500 I'll bet you lose that bet... 173 00:13:42,700 --> 00:13:46,300 ...but learn a much more valuable lesson and win. 174 00:13:46,500 --> 00:13:48,400 In life, that is. 175 00:13:49,200 --> 00:13:50,900 You're both on. 176 00:13:51,100 --> 00:13:52,500 All right. 177 00:13:52,700 --> 00:13:57,300 Let's find you a prom queen, Mr. Let's-Find-Me-A-Prom-Queen. 178 00:13:58,000 --> 00:14:01,800 So, Areola, I noticed your accent keeps changing. 179 00:14:02,100 --> 00:14:03,400 Where are you from? 180 00:14:03,600 --> 00:14:04,900 I cannot tell you that... 181 00:14:05,100 --> 00:14:07,600 ...because I am a generic foreign-exchange student... 182 00:14:07,800 --> 00:14:10,500 ...whose country of origin is of little importance. 183 00:14:11,500 --> 00:14:13,100 Well, have fun in chemistry. 184 00:14:13,300 --> 00:14:16,100 Rightio, love. See you at teatime. 185 00:14:20,400 --> 00:14:21,700 What about her? 186 00:14:21,900 --> 00:14:24,100 Baby's got back. Hunch, that is. 187 00:14:24,300 --> 00:14:27,300 No, way too easy. 188 00:14:27,500 --> 00:14:31,600 - I have no pigment - Any girl with a guitar is hot. 189 00:14:31,800 --> 00:14:33,400 I need sunscreen 190 00:14:33,600 --> 00:14:36,800 Even a hippie albino. She could be prom queen. 191 00:14:37,100 --> 00:14:39,200 What about the Fratelli sisters? 192 00:14:40,200 --> 00:14:43,000 So they're slightly disfigured and connected. 193 00:14:43,200 --> 00:14:47,300 But combined, those two make up one pretty decent chick. 194 00:14:47,500 --> 00:14:49,700 - I'd do them! - I know, Reggie Ray. 195 00:14:49,900 --> 00:14:53,200 I'm looking for somebody really messed up. 196 00:14:53,400 --> 00:14:57,200 I'm talking about a real shitbomb. 197 00:15:00,700 --> 00:15:04,200 Well, bombs away. 198 00:15:04,800 --> 00:15:09,300 No, no, no, anyone but her! Not Janey Briggs. 199 00:15:10,000 --> 00:15:13,100 Guys, she's got glasses and a ponytail. 200 00:15:13,300 --> 00:15:17,100 She's got paint on her overalls! What is that? 201 00:15:17,300 --> 00:15:20,200 There's no way she could be prom queen. 202 00:15:20,400 --> 00:15:22,900 Damn, that shit's wack. 203 00:15:24,300 --> 00:15:25,900 Aim for the head! 204 00:15:40,700 --> 00:15:43,400 Can you imagine what they do in there? 205 00:15:43,600 --> 00:15:45,100 Holy cow. 206 00:15:45,300 --> 00:15:48,600 Guys, get your heads out of the gutter. 207 00:15:48,900 --> 00:15:51,900 It's a locker room. It's no sexier in there... 208 00:15:52,100 --> 00:15:53,800 ...than it is in here. 209 00:15:54,000 --> 00:15:57,600 Molly, can you help me take off my panties? 210 00:15:58,100 --> 00:16:01,100 Hold on, I've got lotion on my hands. 211 00:16:01,300 --> 00:16:04,400 That's okay. You can just use your mouth. 212 00:16:12,600 --> 00:16:14,100 Thanks, Miss Peters. 213 00:16:14,500 --> 00:16:15,800 So... 214 00:16:16,100 --> 00:16:19,900 ...who would like to share their poem with the class? 215 00:16:22,200 --> 00:16:25,300 Mr. Keller? Over here. Right here. Please. 216 00:16:25,500 --> 00:16:27,500 - Anyone? - Mr. Keller! 217 00:16:28,900 --> 00:16:33,100 - I'm not sure we should be doing this. - Quiet. I hear them. 218 00:16:33,300 --> 00:16:36,500 Hey, I found a buffalo nickel! 219 00:16:41,700 --> 00:16:43,100 This is gonna be good. 220 00:16:43,800 --> 00:16:45,500 I think I see nipple. 221 00:16:45,700 --> 00:16:48,000 You think we should let them know we're up here? 222 00:16:48,200 --> 00:16:50,700 Hey, Molly, the hot water's not working on my shower. 223 00:16:50,900 --> 00:16:53,500 - Mind if I share yours? - Not at all, Christy. 224 00:16:53,700 --> 00:16:55,700 But we're gonna have to get real close. 225 00:16:55,900 --> 00:17:00,200 Okay. How about I press up against your back? 226 00:17:01,400 --> 00:17:05,200 Man, it is hot in here. 227 00:17:06,600 --> 00:17:09,000 I gotta take off my shirt. 228 00:17:09,900 --> 00:17:11,200 What? 229 00:17:11,800 --> 00:17:13,400 Doesn't even have to rhyme. 230 00:17:14,300 --> 00:17:17,200 Doesn't even have to be a poem. 231 00:17:17,400 --> 00:17:20,100 - Please pick me. I'm the one. - Yes... 232 00:17:20,600 --> 00:17:22,100 ...Ricky. 233 00:17:30,700 --> 00:17:34,300 - "Ten Things I Love About Janey." - Oh, not again. 234 00:17:34,500 --> 00:17:35,900 By Ricky Lipman. 235 00:17:37,200 --> 00:17:42,000 I love it when Janey talks I love it when Janey walks 236 00:17:42,200 --> 00:17:46,400 I love it when Janey drinks I love it when Janey blinks 237 00:17:46,900 --> 00:17:49,500 I love it when Janey says hi 238 00:17:49,700 --> 00:17:53,600 I love it when Janey says "See you in English" 239 00:17:57,300 --> 00:18:00,700 I love sitting next to Janey in class 240 00:18:00,900 --> 00:18:06,800 I love staring into Janey's window At 1465 South Pass 241 00:18:07,900 --> 00:18:10,900 I love following Janey to the mall 242 00:18:14,400 --> 00:18:16,000 And I love 243 00:18:16,200 --> 00:18:20,700 Collecting strands of Janey's hair 244 00:18:21,000 --> 00:18:27,000 And rolling them up Into little Janey hairballs 245 00:18:38,100 --> 00:18:43,100 Thank you, Ricky, for that interesting poem. 246 00:18:43,900 --> 00:18:47,300 I can't believe what we just did, Molly. 247 00:18:47,500 --> 00:18:53,300 It was a once-in-a-lifetime experience that will never happen again. 248 00:18:53,500 --> 00:18:54,900 I don't know about you guys... 249 00:18:55,100 --> 00:18:58,400 ...but I am really proud of Christy and Molly. 250 00:18:59,100 --> 00:19:01,100 We're going back. 251 00:19:03,400 --> 00:19:06,500 - Put on my shirt. - I'm trying to get mine. 252 00:19:16,600 --> 00:19:17,900 Jackpot. 253 00:19:18,400 --> 00:19:19,700 Girl go pee-pee... 254 00:19:19,900 --> 00:19:22,800 - ...not what I want to see-see. - I agree-gree. 255 00:19:23,000 --> 00:19:26,900 Would you two please try and be a little open-minded? 256 00:19:27,100 --> 00:19:32,800 Class, let's open our books and continue with our poetry lesson. 257 00:19:33,000 --> 00:19:35,500 You know what I think about poetry? 258 00:19:38,300 --> 00:19:41,500 Oh, is that amusing? 259 00:19:42,100 --> 00:19:45,500 Is that what your generation considers humour? 260 00:19:53,000 --> 00:19:56,500 - This make me kind of happy in pants. - Yeah? 261 00:20:01,900 --> 00:20:03,200 Goodness. 262 00:20:03,700 --> 00:20:07,100 That make me kind of sad in pants. 263 00:20:08,100 --> 00:20:11,800 Shakespeare, Moli鑽e... 264 00:20:12,000 --> 00:20:13,900 ...Oscar Wilde. 265 00:20:14,100 --> 00:20:15,800 These were humorists. 266 00:20:18,300 --> 00:20:19,600 I'm gonna be sick. 267 00:20:21,300 --> 00:20:25,700 The sublime poetic genius of a clever turn of phrase. 268 00:20:25,900 --> 00:20:27,800 That is true comedy. 269 00:20:28,700 --> 00:20:30,000 Heavens to Betsy. 270 00:20:32,100 --> 00:20:37,600 Your modern, moronic, feeble-minded, sophomoric excuse for wit... 271 00:20:40,300 --> 00:20:42,800 ...is merely a parade of nasty... 272 00:20:44,200 --> 00:20:46,300 ...filthy, vulgar... 273 00:20:47,600 --> 00:20:50,200 ...human excrement! 274 00:21:10,100 --> 00:21:13,100 - Hey, Janey. What's up? - Excuse me? 275 00:21:13,300 --> 00:21:17,000 Ever want to be the most popular girl in school? 276 00:21:17,300 --> 00:21:19,300 Anorexic, superficial? 277 00:21:19,500 --> 00:21:23,000 A whore who lacks any real long-term goals? 278 00:21:23,300 --> 00:21:24,700 Exactly. 279 00:21:25,000 --> 00:21:28,700 If you're interested, I thought we could go out sometime. 280 00:21:28,900 --> 00:21:30,200 Be seen in public. 281 00:21:30,400 --> 00:21:34,700 - We haven't spoken in four years. - Actually, more like six. 282 00:21:35,100 --> 00:21:38,300 That time when we were in line at that theatre... 283 00:21:38,600 --> 00:21:42,700 ...I was actually saying " hey" to the person behind you. 284 00:21:49,300 --> 00:21:53,000 Friday's championship game is against North Compton... 285 00:21:53,200 --> 00:21:56,000 ...and that squad always tries to bring it. 286 00:21:56,200 --> 00:21:58,700 - Bring what, Priscilla? - Bring it. 287 00:21:59,000 --> 00:22:01,500 Right, but what is " it"? 288 00:22:01,800 --> 00:22:04,300 It's just what they bring, okay? 289 00:22:04,500 --> 00:22:06,900 So then it is what. 290 00:22:07,100 --> 00:22:10,300 - What? - Exactly. That's what it is. 291 00:22:10,500 --> 00:22:12,600 No, it is what I want it to be. 292 00:22:12,800 --> 00:22:15,200 Even if what is what what is or it is what what is... 293 00:22:15,400 --> 00:22:17,300 ...it's just it no matter what, got it? 294 00:22:30,100 --> 00:22:35,200 I'm Sandy Sue. It is simply swell to meet all of you. 295 00:22:36,100 --> 00:22:38,300 Peachy. You brought a routine? 296 00:22:38,600 --> 00:22:40,900 Oh, you bet. 297 00:22:41,500 --> 00:22:43,800 Give me an H. Give me a U. 298 00:22:44,800 --> 00:22:48,400 Give me a giant pussy-licking, ass-fucker cock shit! 299 00:22:52,200 --> 00:22:56,100 I'm sorry. That was my Tourette's. 300 00:22:57,000 --> 00:23:00,000 I don't know about her. 301 00:23:00,200 --> 00:23:03,700 Let's get it straight. This isn't a cheerocracy. 302 00:23:04,200 --> 00:23:05,500 I am the cheertator. 303 00:23:05,700 --> 00:23:10,400 I make the cheercisions, I will deal with the cheeronsequences. 304 00:23:10,700 --> 00:23:14,400 If there are no more cheeruptions, we can cheertinue. 305 00:23:15,200 --> 00:23:16,800 Thank you. 306 00:23:20,400 --> 00:23:23,300 Grandpa stuck a finger in my ass! Cum face! 307 00:23:25,400 --> 00:23:28,200 She'll cheer do. Great. 308 00:23:29,700 --> 00:23:32,500 Goddamn it, let's go now! Thirty-two draw! 309 00:23:32,700 --> 00:23:36,100 Goddamn it! Let's show some goddamn hustle! 310 00:23:36,400 --> 00:23:39,900 Look alive out there! This isn't a goddamn tryout! 311 00:23:40,200 --> 00:23:42,500 - Goddamn it! - Blue 21! Hut! 312 00:23:42,700 --> 00:23:44,200 What the hell? 313 00:23:44,400 --> 00:23:46,900 Nobody's covering that hole! 314 00:23:47,100 --> 00:23:50,000 Goddamn it! Let's do it again! 315 00:23:51,400 --> 00:23:54,200 - Goddamn it! - Marty! Marty! Marty! 316 00:23:55,000 --> 00:23:57,200 All right, Marty. 317 00:23:59,300 --> 00:24:01,800 - Get your ass in there. - You sure? 318 00:24:02,000 --> 00:24:04,400 Just go, goddamn it. 319 00:24:04,600 --> 00:24:06,800 Wyler, we got this wrapped up. 320 00:24:07,100 --> 00:24:11,000 All you gotta do is run out the clock. 321 00:24:13,100 --> 00:24:15,900 For God's sakes, don't try anything fancy! 322 00:24:16,200 --> 00:24:17,700 Goddamn it. 323 00:24:20,600 --> 00:24:22,300 Listen, boys. 324 00:24:22,500 --> 00:24:24,900 We got time for one more play. 325 00:24:25,200 --> 00:24:28,400 - I say we get the ball to Marty. - Damn. 326 00:24:28,700 --> 00:24:31,500 No, I'm just happy being on the field. 327 00:24:31,700 --> 00:24:36,100 Coach reckons we should take a knee. We're up 42-0. 328 00:24:36,400 --> 00:24:38,500 I don't care what coach reckons. 329 00:24:38,700 --> 00:24:41,200 You can't go through life being scared. 330 00:24:41,500 --> 00:24:44,800 If you do, you'll always wonder, "What if?" 331 00:24:45,500 --> 00:24:49,300 But if you go out there and you give it your all... 332 00:24:49,700 --> 00:24:51,300 ...that's heroic. 333 00:24:53,800 --> 00:24:55,800 Guys, I appreciate this, but... 334 00:24:56,000 --> 00:24:58,300 That's the spirit! Ready? 335 00:25:04,000 --> 00:25:06,600 What are you doing? Get out of here. 336 00:25:06,900 --> 00:25:08,300 Not here. Down there. 337 00:25:08,500 --> 00:25:09,800 Over here? 338 00:25:10,000 --> 00:25:12,000 What are you doing? Over here! 339 00:25:12,400 --> 00:25:13,700 Here? 340 00:25:14,800 --> 00:25:16,200 We love you, Marty! 341 00:25:16,400 --> 00:25:18,000 Set, hut! 342 00:25:28,900 --> 00:25:30,600 No. No. 343 00:25:32,000 --> 00:25:34,200 No, don't throw it to me. 344 00:25:34,900 --> 00:25:36,200 No! 345 00:26:02,300 --> 00:26:05,800 - Nice hands, Marty! - I did it. 346 00:26:06,700 --> 00:26:08,600 - I'm a hero! - Walk it off! 347 00:26:09,900 --> 00:26:13,500 All right, goddamn it! Hit the showers, goddamn it! 348 00:26:14,100 --> 00:26:17,000 Bunch of candy-asses. Lousy practice! 349 00:26:17,300 --> 00:26:20,000 We'll get our asses kicked Friday! 350 00:26:20,200 --> 00:26:23,500 What about fourth-string? I didn't get to practice. 351 00:26:23,800 --> 00:26:27,600 After all the shenanigans you pulled last season... 352 00:26:27,800 --> 00:26:32,700 ...thank God you're still in goddamn uniform, goddamn it! 353 00:26:56,700 --> 00:27:00,900 If my parents hear I got detention, no dessert for a week. 354 00:27:01,100 --> 00:27:03,200 We've disgraced ourselves and our families. 355 00:27:03,400 --> 00:27:05,300 Guys, guys. 356 00:27:05,500 --> 00:27:09,400 I sense the morale's a little low. I say we make a pact... 357 00:27:10,100 --> 00:27:11,900 ...right here, right now. 358 00:27:12,100 --> 00:27:15,300 Before the end of the year, we all get laid! 359 00:27:15,900 --> 00:27:17,800 We always make that pact. 360 00:27:18,000 --> 00:27:20,900 We've been waiting for this since puberty. 361 00:27:21,100 --> 00:27:24,500 - Two weeks ago! - I just got first hair on ball. 362 00:27:25,100 --> 00:27:27,600 I don't think you understand. 363 00:27:28,100 --> 00:27:31,500 We'll become the masters of our sexual destiny. 364 00:27:31,700 --> 00:27:35,500 No longer will our penises remain flaccid and unused. 365 00:27:35,700 --> 00:27:38,200 No longer steal Grandfather's porn. 366 00:27:38,800 --> 00:27:42,500 No longer will we use blindfolds when we jerk each other off. 367 00:27:43,300 --> 00:27:44,800 All right, that's it. 368 00:27:48,700 --> 00:27:51,100 What in God's name is going on? 369 00:27:51,300 --> 00:27:53,900 - What was that ruckus? - I no hear ruckus. 370 00:27:54,200 --> 00:27:58,300 - I heard a ruckus. - Can you describe this ruckus, sir? 371 00:27:58,600 --> 00:28:01,300 You better watch your tongue, young man! 372 00:28:01,500 --> 00:28:03,400 We were just sitting here. 373 00:28:03,600 --> 00:28:06,600 You just bought yourself another detention. 374 00:28:06,900 --> 00:28:09,700 - That's not fair. - Cry me a river, dickface. 375 00:28:09,900 --> 00:28:12,800 - You bought another one. - Eat my shorts. 376 00:28:13,300 --> 00:28:14,600 What was that? 377 00:28:14,900 --> 00:28:18,100 Eat my shorts! 378 00:28:18,300 --> 00:28:21,100 - Don't mess with a bull. - I'm shaking. 379 00:28:21,300 --> 00:28:22,900 - You got another. - Good! 380 00:28:23,100 --> 00:28:25,700 - You through? - Not even close, bud. 381 00:28:26,000 --> 00:28:27,700 - Want another one? - Yes. 382 00:28:27,900 --> 00:28:29,200 - You got it! - Good. 383 00:28:29,400 --> 00:28:31,400 - Another one. Had enough? - No. 384 00:28:31,600 --> 00:28:33,600 - Another one. - So? 385 00:28:33,800 --> 00:28:35,700 - I can keep going. - Go! 386 00:28:35,900 --> 00:28:37,400 - Eenie, meenie, minie... - Moe. 387 00:28:37,600 --> 00:28:39,500 - Your mom's a... - Ho. 388 00:28:39,800 --> 00:28:41,500 - He's a famous clown. - Bobo. 389 00:28:41,700 --> 00:28:43,900 Mitch, cut it out. 390 00:28:44,500 --> 00:28:45,900 Stop. 391 00:28:46,200 --> 00:28:48,100 - Another one. - But I was... 392 00:28:48,300 --> 00:28:49,600 That's another one! 393 00:28:49,900 --> 00:28:52,600 - One more for Ox or for Mitch? - Another. 394 00:28:53,400 --> 00:28:55,500 - I confused. - Shut up, Wang Chung. 395 00:28:55,700 --> 00:28:59,700 I got you for the rest of your lives. You're mine. 396 00:29:00,100 --> 00:29:03,700 Next time, I'm cracking skulls. 397 00:29:19,400 --> 00:29:22,100 How many times have I said I'm not going to Princeton? 398 00:29:22,300 --> 00:29:24,200 I'm not pressuring you. 399 00:29:24,600 --> 00:29:26,300 Just give it four years. 400 00:29:26,500 --> 00:29:29,800 If you don't like it, you can work at my firm. 401 00:29:30,100 --> 00:29:32,800 I don't want your life! 402 00:29:33,400 --> 00:29:34,700 That's okay, son. 403 00:29:34,900 --> 00:29:37,700 I heard about what happened with Priscilla. 404 00:29:37,900 --> 00:29:39,200 The good news is... 405 00:29:39,400 --> 00:29:41,900 ...I've got the perfect rebound girl. 406 00:29:42,100 --> 00:29:43,400 Really? 407 00:29:44,800 --> 00:29:47,500 Beverly! Could you come in here? 408 00:29:53,600 --> 00:29:54,800 That's Mom! 409 00:29:55,100 --> 00:29:57,100 What do you say, kiddo? 410 00:29:57,900 --> 00:30:00,200 I'm gonna leave you two alone. 411 00:30:10,800 --> 00:30:12,900 Would you prefer the top or bottom, dear? 412 00:30:13,100 --> 00:30:15,600 Oh, my God! 413 00:30:16,000 --> 00:30:18,300 So you in love? 414 00:30:20,700 --> 00:30:24,500 - Yeah, I think I am. - Well, who is this guy? 415 00:30:24,700 --> 00:30:28,900 His name is Blane. He's a senior. He's so beautiful. 416 00:30:34,400 --> 00:30:37,800 Janey? Sweetheart? 417 00:30:40,300 --> 00:30:41,700 Hi, Daddy. 418 00:30:41,900 --> 00:30:44,600 Is something wrong? You were quiet at dinner. 419 00:30:45,200 --> 00:30:47,900 You were passed out on the table. 420 00:30:53,300 --> 00:30:55,100 Listen, honey... 421 00:30:55,300 --> 00:30:59,300 ...I may not always be coherent or conscious... 422 00:30:59,600 --> 00:31:04,000 ...but I know when my girl's got something on her mind. 423 00:31:04,500 --> 00:31:07,400 Well, there is this popular boy, Jake. 424 00:31:07,700 --> 00:31:11,300 Oh, sweetie. 425 00:31:12,600 --> 00:31:15,100 Jake knocked you up, didn't he? 426 00:31:15,300 --> 00:31:17,200 No, he asked me out. 427 00:31:18,900 --> 00:31:22,200 Do you like him? Are you attracted to him? 428 00:31:22,500 --> 00:31:25,200 I mean, would you give him head? 429 00:31:25,400 --> 00:31:28,200 He is kind of cute, but... 430 00:31:28,500 --> 00:31:30,800 ...he's always been a total jerk. 431 00:31:31,000 --> 00:31:33,500 It's weird that he's talking to me now. 432 00:31:33,800 --> 00:31:37,500 Especially after you've packed on a couple of pounds. 433 00:31:41,700 --> 00:31:44,200 What do you think I should do? 434 00:31:44,500 --> 00:31:46,100 Look, sweetie. 435 00:31:46,400 --> 00:31:50,800 I never want you to do anything that compromises who you are... 436 00:31:51,100 --> 00:31:54,400 ...because you're very, very special to me. 437 00:31:54,700 --> 00:31:58,600 If Jake is only asking you out to get into your pants... 438 00:31:59,100 --> 00:32:01,100 ...well, then I'd say... 439 00:32:01,300 --> 00:32:03,200 ...go out with him. 440 00:32:03,400 --> 00:32:06,900 You could certainly use the popularity points. 441 00:32:07,400 --> 00:32:09,200 And if Jake likes you... 442 00:32:09,400 --> 00:32:14,500 ...then maybe those kids'll quit throwing bags of shit on the porch. 443 00:32:20,100 --> 00:32:21,700 I feel better. 444 00:32:24,300 --> 00:32:27,000 Thanks for the advice, Daddy. 445 00:32:28,000 --> 00:32:31,200 That's what I'm here for, pumpkin-tits. 446 00:32:35,500 --> 00:32:36,800 Catherine. 447 00:32:38,300 --> 00:32:41,400 - I need to ask you a favour. - It's about time. 448 00:32:41,800 --> 00:32:43,900 No, not that. 449 00:32:45,600 --> 00:32:48,600 You're the cruellest girl in high school. 450 00:32:48,800 --> 00:32:52,900 You're the only one who can help trick Janey into liking me. 451 00:32:53,200 --> 00:32:56,700 That girl with the glasses and the ponytail? 452 00:32:56,900 --> 00:32:59,900 Don't forget the paint-covered overalls. 453 00:33:01,100 --> 00:33:03,500 Well... 454 00:33:03,800 --> 00:33:06,300 ...it's going to be difficult. 455 00:33:07,100 --> 00:33:09,300 But I think I can help you. 456 00:33:09,600 --> 00:33:11,000 Sit. 457 00:33:14,300 --> 00:33:15,900 For a price. 458 00:33:18,100 --> 00:33:21,300 And this time, I don't want your car. 459 00:33:23,000 --> 00:33:24,600 I want you. 460 00:33:25,000 --> 00:33:28,500 Catherine, that's disgusting. You're my sister. 461 00:33:28,800 --> 00:33:31,300 Only by blood. 462 00:33:31,500 --> 00:33:36,900 - What is wrong with this family? - Hey, do you want my help or not? 463 00:33:50,500 --> 00:33:53,600 Okay, there are three things you need to do... 464 00:33:53,800 --> 00:33:56,600 ...to have Janey eating out of your hand. 465 00:34:04,800 --> 00:34:06,600 First, you earn her trust. 466 00:34:07,100 --> 00:34:08,400 Punk! 467 00:34:08,600 --> 00:34:10,100 Come on, leave him alone! 468 00:34:10,500 --> 00:34:14,500 Hey! Come on, guys, back off. That's enough, okay? 469 00:34:18,200 --> 00:34:19,800 You little shit. 470 00:34:31,500 --> 00:34:34,100 Don't you guys mess with him again. 471 00:34:34,400 --> 00:34:39,200 Once you've got her trust, it's time to make her feel special. 472 00:34:39,800 --> 00:34:43,600 Pick a song with her name in it. That always works. 473 00:35:01,600 --> 00:35:04,600 Janey's got a gun 474 00:35:04,900 --> 00:35:06,400 Janey's got a gun 475 00:35:06,600 --> 00:35:09,400 She's got a gun! Janey's got a gun! 476 00:35:09,700 --> 00:35:11,800 The whole world's come undone 477 00:35:13,000 --> 00:35:15,000 Janey Briggs got a gun 478 00:35:15,700 --> 00:35:19,900 So run away Run away from the pain 479 00:35:20,300 --> 00:35:21,600 Take it easy, miss. 480 00:35:21,800 --> 00:35:23,600 - Wait. - Get back here! 481 00:35:23,800 --> 00:35:27,400 Run away, run away from the pain 482 00:35:27,900 --> 00:35:29,200 Hold her down. 483 00:35:31,900 --> 00:35:35,100 Give me your hand! Just give us the gun, Janey. 484 00:35:36,000 --> 00:35:39,200 After you've made her feel special... 485 00:35:39,400 --> 00:35:42,400 ...it's time to put the icing on the cake. 486 00:35:42,700 --> 00:35:45,200 I'm really glad you showed up, Janey. 487 00:35:45,500 --> 00:35:50,200 The only reason I came here was to tell you to leave me alone. 488 00:35:50,500 --> 00:35:53,500 You know, I was just making a snack. 489 00:35:53,700 --> 00:35:55,500 You want one? 490 00:35:56,200 --> 00:35:58,100 No. Listen, Jake... 491 00:35:58,300 --> 00:36:00,000 I'll be right back. 492 00:36:00,800 --> 00:36:01,800 But I... 493 00:36:37,300 --> 00:36:38,900 Hungry? 494 00:36:42,000 --> 00:36:43,500 I don't like sundaes. 495 00:36:43,700 --> 00:36:48,000 It's not a sundae, it's a banana split. 496 00:36:49,600 --> 00:36:53,500 I don't like those either. Goodbye, Jake. 497 00:37:09,900 --> 00:37:11,300 So, Jake... 498 00:37:11,500 --> 00:37:15,800 ...how's it going with Janey, Janey, I couldn't be any more plainy? 499 00:37:17,600 --> 00:37:22,600 Well, you can ask her when I take her to Preston Wasserstein's big party. 500 00:37:24,000 --> 00:37:25,200 Really? 501 00:37:27,200 --> 00:37:28,900 Really. 502 00:37:30,500 --> 00:37:31,800 How fitting. 503 00:37:32,000 --> 00:37:33,700 Everyone here is eating steak... 504 00:37:33,900 --> 00:37:37,100 ...but your boy, he's the chickenshit. 505 00:37:37,900 --> 00:37:41,700 Jake may not produce the proper enzymes to digest red meat... 506 00:37:41,900 --> 00:37:46,100 ...but he'll always be more of a quarterback than Austin. 507 00:37:46,300 --> 00:37:48,700 Oh, really? 508 00:37:48,900 --> 00:37:50,700 That's right. 509 00:37:50,900 --> 00:37:52,500 Really. 510 00:37:52,700 --> 00:37:55,700 Come on, son. Let's show them. 511 00:37:57,200 --> 00:37:58,200 I smell a bet. 512 00:38:01,600 --> 00:38:03,000 Come on, Austin. 513 00:38:10,800 --> 00:38:13,100 All right, Jake, let's do it. 514 00:38:13,300 --> 00:38:16,000 All right, let's go. 515 00:38:16,200 --> 00:38:18,500 What's the odds, huh? Hey, what's the odds? 516 00:38:18,700 --> 00:38:23,700 What, 2-1? Shit. You stupid damn hog. 517 00:38:25,100 --> 00:38:27,100 Must've been the wind, son. Try again. 518 00:38:30,700 --> 00:38:32,300 Damn! 519 00:38:35,200 --> 00:38:37,500 I think I moved that time. 520 00:38:38,500 --> 00:38:39,500 And that time. 521 00:38:43,800 --> 00:38:44,800 Shit! 522 00:38:49,500 --> 00:38:51,200 That is wack. 523 00:38:54,500 --> 00:38:56,800 Just nail your mother, son. 524 00:38:57,000 --> 00:38:59,300 That's it. That's it. 525 00:39:00,400 --> 00:39:01,800 Way to go, Jake. 526 00:39:02,000 --> 00:39:04,600 At least you kept them in the yard this time. 527 00:39:08,900 --> 00:39:11,800 I left some money on the kitchen counter. 528 00:39:12,000 --> 00:39:14,400 Emergency numbers are by the phone. 529 00:39:14,700 --> 00:39:17,100 And remember, son: No parties. 530 00:39:17,400 --> 00:39:18,600 I know, Dad. 531 00:39:19,000 --> 00:39:20,700 Keg coming through. Hey. 532 00:39:21,500 --> 00:39:22,800 What's up, man? 533 00:39:23,000 --> 00:39:25,000 We're trusting you, Preston. 534 00:39:25,200 --> 00:39:29,500 - Where do you want the speakers? - In the dining room. 535 00:39:29,700 --> 00:39:31,900 You guys should hit the road. 536 00:39:32,100 --> 00:39:34,700 I'm taking your Ferrari to buy hookers. 537 00:39:35,000 --> 00:39:37,500 We'll call you later to check in. 538 00:39:37,700 --> 00:39:41,100 I'll be so high, I won't know where the phone is. 539 00:39:41,300 --> 00:39:42,800 That's my boy. 540 00:39:46,200 --> 00:39:48,400 Jake, what are you doing here? 541 00:39:48,600 --> 00:39:51,200 I'm taking you to Preston's big party. 542 00:39:51,900 --> 00:39:52,900 I can't. 543 00:39:53,100 --> 00:39:57,300 I'm not dressed to go to a party. I'm a complete mess. 544 00:39:57,500 --> 00:40:01,100 I'd say you're one big fucking train wreck. 545 00:40:18,600 --> 00:40:23,000 Maybe a little cover-up would do the trick. 546 00:40:23,900 --> 00:40:25,100 Okay. 547 00:40:29,000 --> 00:40:31,800 What do we have to work with here? 548 00:40:33,500 --> 00:40:38,500 These are quite nice. 549 00:40:45,500 --> 00:40:48,400 And everything seems to be in working order down here. 550 00:40:54,300 --> 00:40:56,000 What are you doing? 551 00:40:57,800 --> 00:41:01,400 That's it. I've got it. 552 00:41:01,600 --> 00:41:02,700 What? 553 00:41:03,000 --> 00:41:07,000 It might seem crazy, but you'll have to trust me. 554 00:41:34,800 --> 00:41:36,600 That's it. 555 00:41:36,800 --> 00:41:39,600 I did it. I'm a miracle-worker. 556 00:41:42,600 --> 00:41:44,200 Gentlemen... 557 00:41:44,500 --> 00:41:47,500 ...may I present to you the new and improved... 558 00:41:48,100 --> 00:41:50,300 ...Janey Briggs. 559 00:42:25,000 --> 00:42:29,200 Congratulations. You just got your first slow-motion entrance. 560 00:42:51,500 --> 00:42:53,700 I'm okay! 561 00:42:53,900 --> 00:42:55,100 Janey? 562 00:42:57,100 --> 00:43:00,800 Come on out of there, honey. Quit farting around. 563 00:43:09,600 --> 00:43:12,500 - Got your mom's car keys? - Check. 564 00:43:14,700 --> 00:43:16,200 - Sleeping bags. - Check. 565 00:43:16,400 --> 00:43:17,500 - Condoms. - Check. 566 00:43:17,800 --> 00:43:22,900 Three pubescent libidos to take us on a series of wild adventures. 567 00:43:23,200 --> 00:43:25,400 Check! Road trip! 568 00:43:40,900 --> 00:43:42,100 We here. 569 00:43:42,600 --> 00:43:46,600 Gentlemen, tonight we go to our first high school party. 570 00:43:47,100 --> 00:43:50,400 This is the place to buzz the Brillo. 571 00:43:50,600 --> 00:43:52,700 How you plan on buzzing Brillo? 572 00:43:53,800 --> 00:43:57,800 With this letter. Amanda Becker will know the truth: 573 00:43:58,000 --> 00:44:00,700 I've loved her since I first saw her. 574 00:44:01,900 --> 00:44:04,000 Mitch, that was yesterday. 575 00:44:05,200 --> 00:44:06,500 Welcome to the party. 576 00:44:06,800 --> 00:44:11,000 If you're going to have sex, do it in my parents' bedroom. 577 00:44:12,100 --> 00:44:16,500 - Does she go to our school? - It's not even the same person. 578 00:44:16,800 --> 00:44:19,400 Janey-stainey-stained-pants-overalls? 579 00:44:19,600 --> 00:44:21,800 How did you talk me into this? 580 00:44:22,100 --> 00:44:26,800 Priscilla's freaking out now that Janey's lost her ponytail. 581 00:44:27,000 --> 00:44:30,100 I'm going to go fuck a complete stranger. 582 00:44:30,300 --> 00:44:33,400 Hey, I'm a complete stranger. 583 00:44:35,800 --> 00:44:39,300 Relax, all right? It's going to be okay. 584 00:44:39,800 --> 00:44:40,800 Nice turtleneck. 585 00:44:41,100 --> 00:44:43,000 What's your name? 586 00:44:43,200 --> 00:44:46,500 I'm Sandy Sue. Limp-dick fag-fucker! 587 00:44:46,700 --> 00:44:48,800 Who told you that? Alison? 588 00:44:49,000 --> 00:44:51,800 Alison was bitter when we broke up. 589 00:44:52,000 --> 00:44:56,500 - Completely fake. - Yeah, that's not her real hair colour. 590 00:44:56,700 --> 00:45:00,800 - She's wearing the same outfit as me. - It looks much better on you. 591 00:45:01,500 --> 00:45:03,900 Where is she? I thought she'd be here by now. 592 00:45:19,300 --> 00:45:20,900 What's going on? 593 00:45:22,200 --> 00:45:27,200 We can't talk until she starts moving again. 594 00:45:42,900 --> 00:45:44,800 What are you doing here? 595 00:45:47,400 --> 00:45:48,600 What do you mean? 596 00:45:48,800 --> 00:45:53,100 I'm supposed to be the only black guy at this party. 597 00:45:53,900 --> 00:45:57,400 - Damn. Shit. - Yeah, I know. 598 00:45:57,600 --> 00:45:58,700 - It's wack. - It's wack. 599 00:45:58,900 --> 00:46:00,000 My bad, man. 600 00:46:00,200 --> 00:46:02,000 - Take this. - Thanks. 601 00:46:02,200 --> 00:46:03,600 Do your thing. 602 00:46:04,200 --> 00:46:07,700 - Peace out, brother. - Honest mistake. 603 00:46:09,100 --> 00:46:10,300 Yeah. 604 00:46:29,900 --> 00:46:32,400 Get back to the line, geek. 605 00:46:36,300 --> 00:46:38,200 Thank you. 606 00:46:45,500 --> 00:46:48,300 Hi, my name is Catherine. 607 00:46:49,000 --> 00:46:53,600 Yeah, I know. We just had sex five minutes ago. 608 00:46:58,000 --> 00:47:00,100 Not scoring any cock either? 609 00:47:00,400 --> 00:47:04,400 Cock? I've never even been kissed. 610 00:47:26,700 --> 00:47:28,300 Janey. 611 00:47:33,000 --> 00:47:34,900 Janey! 612 00:47:35,300 --> 00:47:37,100 Janey. 613 00:47:46,400 --> 00:47:51,000 What up, my yellow brothers? Chinks in the house! 614 00:48:15,000 --> 00:48:16,900 This never actually happens in real life. 615 00:48:17,100 --> 00:48:18,500 Then why are we doing this? 616 00:48:18,700 --> 00:48:20,500 I have no idea. 617 00:48:29,700 --> 00:48:31,600 Janey! 618 00:48:38,100 --> 00:48:42,100 Reggie Ray, have you seen Janey anywhere? 619 00:48:43,100 --> 00:48:46,000 It's a good night for smoking. 620 00:48:46,200 --> 00:48:48,400 Ain't that right, Sausage? 621 00:48:56,100 --> 00:48:59,700 Okay, now close your eyes and wet your lips. 622 00:49:00,000 --> 00:49:03,500 - Are you for real? - Do you want to learn or not? 623 00:49:05,100 --> 00:49:07,900 I guess. 624 00:49:18,100 --> 00:49:23,400 - See? That wasn't so scary. - It was nothing. 625 00:49:24,800 --> 00:49:27,100 Okay. 626 00:49:27,300 --> 00:49:29,800 Let's try again. 627 00:49:30,100 --> 00:49:34,400 Only this time, I'm gonna stick my tongue in your mouth. 628 00:49:34,600 --> 00:49:39,200 And when I do that, I want you to massage my tongue with yours. 629 00:49:39,400 --> 00:49:43,700 - And that's what first base is. - Okay. 630 00:49:44,100 --> 00:49:45,800 Eyes closed. 631 00:50:11,200 --> 00:50:13,300 That was cool. 632 00:50:15,800 --> 00:50:17,300 Now... 633 00:50:17,500 --> 00:50:20,900 ...have you ever eaten pussy before? 634 00:50:23,300 --> 00:50:26,200 You call this a party?! 635 00:50:26,500 --> 00:50:29,000 I'm a golden goddess! 636 00:50:29,300 --> 00:50:32,100 - Show us how drunk you are! - Go for it! 637 00:50:38,600 --> 00:50:40,800 You're a unique rebel, Janey! 638 00:50:41,600 --> 00:50:43,400 Janey, are you all right? 639 00:50:44,300 --> 00:50:49,400 - I told you not to let me drink. - I gave you a nonalcoholic beer. 640 00:50:53,900 --> 00:50:56,700 What the hell are you doing here? 641 00:50:56,900 --> 00:50:58,000 I was invited. 642 00:50:58,300 --> 00:51:03,000 Look, you may have lost those glasses and that ponytail thing... 643 00:51:03,300 --> 00:51:06,200 ...but you're still a loser. 644 00:51:12,000 --> 00:51:15,200 Look at that. Oh, my God. 645 00:51:15,400 --> 00:51:17,600 That's going to stain. 646 00:51:22,700 --> 00:51:26,000 You're not going to cry now, are you? 647 00:52:07,500 --> 00:52:11,600 Look, you can't just start a slow clap at any old time. 648 00:52:11,900 --> 00:52:17,600 - You gotta wait for the right moment. - When is it the right moment? 649 00:52:20,400 --> 00:52:22,500 You'll know. 650 00:52:34,700 --> 00:52:36,800 Nobody's allowed down here. 651 00:52:37,500 --> 00:52:39,100 Janey, I just thought... 652 00:52:39,300 --> 00:52:42,600 How did you get in here? I dead-bolted the door. 653 00:52:43,800 --> 00:52:46,100 There's a hole in the side of your house. 654 00:52:52,100 --> 00:52:54,200 Who's that? 655 00:52:54,400 --> 00:52:57,600 - It's my mother. - You have her eyes. 656 00:53:00,000 --> 00:53:02,500 She died when I was 6. 657 00:53:03,700 --> 00:53:05,600 I'm sorry. 658 00:53:05,800 --> 00:53:08,800 I remember it like it was yesterday. 659 00:53:09,000 --> 00:53:14,500 Christmas, 1989. Dad had been fired from the zipper factory. 660 00:53:14,700 --> 00:53:17,800 Mom was pulling in tricks to make ends meet. 661 00:53:18,000 --> 00:53:21,400 Daniel Day-Lewis won an Oscar for My Left Foot. 662 00:53:21,600 --> 00:53:24,900 And all I wanted was a little Betsy Wetsy doll. 663 00:53:25,100 --> 00:53:30,300 I remember those. Push her belly, she'd piss all over herself. 664 00:53:30,500 --> 00:53:34,600 She said she was going out to get my dad a bottle of gin... 665 00:53:34,800 --> 00:53:38,500 ...but I knew she was going to get me that present. 666 00:53:38,800 --> 00:53:42,800 It was raining really hard that night... 667 00:53:43,000 --> 00:53:45,700 ...and the roads were slippery. 668 00:53:46,200 --> 00:53:49,500 Oh, God, Janey. A car accident. 669 00:53:49,800 --> 00:53:52,000 No. Cancer. 670 00:53:55,700 --> 00:53:59,200 I had to take on all of her responsibilities: 671 00:53:59,400 --> 00:54:02,900 Cooking and cleaning and breast-feeding Mitch. 672 00:54:03,100 --> 00:54:06,300 It's in the past. Think about your future. 673 00:54:06,500 --> 00:54:08,900 Look how talented you are. 674 00:54:09,200 --> 00:54:13,700 I have this dream of just hopping on a plane and going to Paris. 675 00:54:14,000 --> 00:54:17,000 There's an art school, but I can't afford it. 676 00:54:17,500 --> 00:54:21,700 Unless I raise $26,000 before the admissions cutoff. 677 00:54:21,900 --> 00:54:27,300 My parents give a scholarship to girls who can't get into art school. 678 00:54:27,500 --> 00:54:29,400 Really? That's amazing. 679 00:54:29,700 --> 00:54:34,000 This year we gave it to Lupe, the Mexican finger painter. 680 00:54:34,200 --> 00:54:36,300 I think you'd really like her work. 681 00:54:37,900 --> 00:54:41,500 Sometimes I wish my life was a fairy tale... 682 00:54:41,800 --> 00:54:45,000 ...and some guy would come and take me away. 683 00:55:09,400 --> 00:55:11,100 - I was... - Yeah, because we... 684 00:55:11,300 --> 00:55:15,300 - My eyes were shut. - And we couldn't even... 685 00:55:23,100 --> 00:55:25,600 I'm gonna... 686 00:55:25,800 --> 00:55:28,300 - I'm going to go. - Okay. 687 00:55:29,300 --> 00:55:32,400 Congratulations to the men and women nominated for prom queen. 688 00:55:37,000 --> 00:55:38,500 Janey! 689 00:55:38,700 --> 00:55:40,700 - Janey. - What a nerd. 690 00:55:42,800 --> 00:55:44,600 Hi. Check it out. 691 00:55:44,800 --> 00:55:47,000 You have been nominated for prom queen. 692 00:55:47,200 --> 00:55:49,500 - What? - Yeah. 693 00:55:51,200 --> 00:55:53,500 - I can't believe it. - Yeah. 694 00:55:53,700 --> 00:55:56,800 So do you have a date yet? 695 00:55:57,000 --> 00:55:59,700 No, nobody's asked me. 696 00:55:59,900 --> 00:56:02,900 Do you wanna go? 697 00:56:03,100 --> 00:56:06,000 Of course, if somebody asked me. 698 00:56:06,200 --> 00:56:08,800 Then I'm asking you right now. 699 00:56:09,000 --> 00:56:11,000 About what? 700 00:56:11,200 --> 00:56:13,100 The prom. 701 00:56:13,300 --> 00:56:15,800 Yeah, I know. It's on Saturday, silly. 702 00:56:16,000 --> 00:56:18,000 See you in English. 703 00:56:18,200 --> 00:56:19,900 Okay. 704 00:56:20,600 --> 00:56:22,800 I had a feeling you were gonna say that. 705 00:56:34,300 --> 00:56:38,000 Think you'll be prom queen? Well, think again, Janey. 706 00:56:38,200 --> 00:56:42,300 You put the "ass" in "embarrassment," the " boo" in "taboo." 707 00:56:42,500 --> 00:56:45,600 And the "suck" in " liposuction." 708 00:56:49,200 --> 00:56:50,800 Is that the best you can do? 709 00:56:52,100 --> 00:56:53,900 No. 710 00:56:54,000 --> 00:56:57,100 You also put the " brat" in " bratwurst." 711 00:56:57,300 --> 00:57:00,300 And the "eew" in "jujitsu." 712 00:57:00,500 --> 00:57:05,200 And the " ism" in "This is all just a defence mechanism." 713 00:57:09,400 --> 00:57:14,100 So I told her, "Take the old lady and send your mama back." 714 00:57:15,400 --> 00:57:20,000 So you asked your four-eyed circus freak to the prom yet? 715 00:57:20,300 --> 00:57:22,400 - We resent that! - We resent that! 716 00:57:24,000 --> 00:57:27,000 Why don't you just drop it, Austin. 717 00:57:27,200 --> 00:57:32,100 Jake made a few paint stains in his pants thinking about Janey. 718 00:57:32,900 --> 00:57:35,900 It's just a bet. Okay, man? 719 00:57:36,400 --> 00:57:39,100 You always had a thing for ugly girls... 720 00:57:39,300 --> 00:57:42,900 ...Mr. I-Have- a-Thing-for-Ugly-Girls. 721 00:57:45,300 --> 00:57:46,700 You mean Janey? 722 00:57:46,900 --> 00:57:50,500 She looks as good as a dumpster full of gristles. 723 00:57:50,900 --> 00:57:53,300 Bling-bling. 724 00:57:54,900 --> 00:57:57,200 Janey Briggs... 725 00:57:57,400 --> 00:57:59,100 ...is hot. 726 00:58:16,200 --> 00:58:19,000 - Hey, Janey. - Hey, Jake. 727 00:58:19,200 --> 00:58:22,100 I've been doing a lot of thinking... 728 00:58:22,300 --> 00:58:27,100 ...and there's something I want to ask you. 729 00:58:27,300 --> 00:58:30,200 I don't want to make a big deal of it... 730 00:58:30,400 --> 00:58:34,900 ...so I'm just gonna lay it out there, okay? 731 00:58:35,600 --> 00:58:37,500 Here it is. 732 00:58:39,700 --> 00:58:42,600 See, I don't like making big speeches. 733 00:58:42,900 --> 00:58:46,600 I'm a straight shooter. I call them like I see them. 734 00:58:47,000 --> 00:58:49,000 What you see is what you get. 735 00:58:49,700 --> 00:58:54,800 Ain't nobody gonna break my stride. Ain't nobody gonna slow me down. 736 00:58:55,000 --> 00:58:58,300 Jake, are you trying to ask me to the...? 737 00:58:58,500 --> 00:59:00,600 Yeah. 738 00:59:00,800 --> 00:59:02,900 I'd love to go with you. 739 00:59:07,600 --> 00:59:10,000 Great. Great. 740 00:59:13,100 --> 00:59:14,400 I'll see you in English. 741 00:59:14,700 --> 00:59:16,100 You... 742 00:59:18,300 --> 00:59:20,100 It's Friday night, it's 8:00... 743 00:59:20,300 --> 00:59:22,300 ...and that can only mean one thing. 744 00:59:22,500 --> 00:59:26,300 You guessed it. A new episode of Sabrina, the Teenage Witch. 745 00:59:27,600 --> 00:59:29,800 But if you're not a fan of Melissa Joan Hart... 746 00:59:30,000 --> 00:59:31,600 ...and I'm not sure who isn't... 747 00:59:31,700 --> 00:59:34,600 ...there's a state championship to be played. 748 00:59:36,400 --> 00:59:39,900 All right. It's time to play some football! 749 00:59:40,100 --> 00:59:45,400 The John Hughes Wasps take on the North Compton Wildcats. 750 01:00:03,300 --> 01:00:04,900 Goddamn! 751 01:00:12,400 --> 01:00:15,400 That's the fastest half of football ever. 752 01:00:20,300 --> 01:00:24,100 We saw you at our practice. I know you stole our routine. 753 01:00:24,300 --> 01:00:29,100 I don't know what you mean. We do our own cheers. Right, girls? 754 01:00:29,300 --> 01:00:30,300 That's right. 755 01:00:30,500 --> 01:00:33,600 Well, then, you better bring it. 756 01:00:33,800 --> 01:00:36,100 Oh, it's already been broughten. 757 01:00:36,800 --> 01:00:39,100 Nice comeback, Priscilla! Yeah! 758 01:00:39,600 --> 01:00:42,600 We are the North Compton Wildcats 759 01:00:42,900 --> 01:00:44,400 We're black, we know it 760 01:00:44,600 --> 01:00:46,800 We shake our booty and show it 761 01:00:47,100 --> 01:00:48,900 We ain't white We ain't white 762 01:00:49,100 --> 01:00:52,400 We definitely ain't white Break it down, nigga 763 01:00:58,300 --> 01:01:01,100 Damn, those bitches represent! 764 01:01:08,700 --> 01:01:10,000 All right! 765 01:01:11,100 --> 01:01:13,200 - Reggie Ray. - I smell a bet. 766 01:01:14,400 --> 01:01:15,800 You all right? 767 01:01:16,000 --> 01:01:19,000 Coach says it's okay to bleed from the ears. 768 01:01:24,400 --> 01:01:27,500 I got to go back out on the field. 769 01:01:28,900 --> 01:01:31,800 All right. Be careful. You only have three... 770 01:01:32,800 --> 01:01:36,300 Two concussions left. Reggie Ray. 771 01:01:36,500 --> 01:01:38,000 And we're back. 772 01:01:39,900 --> 01:01:41,800 Let's go, Wasps! 773 01:01:42,600 --> 01:01:44,400 Let's go, Wasps! 774 01:01:45,300 --> 01:01:46,600 Let's go, Wasps! 775 01:01:48,500 --> 01:01:50,200 Blue 33! Set! 776 01:01:52,300 --> 01:01:54,200 That's defence right there. 777 01:01:55,400 --> 01:01:57,500 Say "good day" to Reggie Ray. 778 01:02:00,100 --> 01:02:03,100 Sit down. He got the wind knocked out of him. 779 01:02:03,500 --> 01:02:06,800 - Come on, Reggie Ray, get up! - Reggie Ray. 780 01:02:07,000 --> 01:02:09,300 You still have another concussion! 781 01:02:12,500 --> 01:02:14,200 Come on, dog! 782 01:02:14,400 --> 01:02:16,600 It doesn't look good, coach. 783 01:02:16,900 --> 01:02:18,900 - Can he play? - He's in a coma. 784 01:02:19,100 --> 01:02:22,200 Answer my question! Can he play? 785 01:02:22,400 --> 01:02:25,300 He can't breathe. Get him to a hospital. 786 01:02:25,500 --> 01:02:26,600 Listen right now! 787 01:02:26,900 --> 01:02:32,400 I don't care what you have to do! He stays in the game, goddamn it! 788 01:02:33,700 --> 01:02:35,800 - Coach, I'm in love with you. - Goddamn it! 789 01:02:36,000 --> 01:02:37,400 Fuck. 790 01:02:44,300 --> 01:02:47,200 Holy shit, this motherfucker's heavy. 791 01:02:47,700 --> 01:02:49,000 Blue 15! 792 01:02:51,800 --> 01:02:53,300 Set! Hut! 793 01:02:57,200 --> 01:02:59,300 Goddamn it, Reggie Ray! 794 01:03:00,400 --> 01:03:01,700 Shit. 795 01:03:20,900 --> 01:03:23,900 Wham, bam, what the fuck just happened? 796 01:03:27,200 --> 01:03:32,000 Okay, Wyler, I've got no choice. You're the only quarterback I've got. 797 01:03:33,300 --> 01:03:37,600 - I say give the ball to Marty. - I'm just happy being on the field. 798 01:03:38,500 --> 01:03:43,000 - You'll always wonder, "What if?" - I'm a hero! 799 01:03:44,900 --> 01:03:47,000 Goddamn it! Get in the game! 800 01:03:47,300 --> 01:03:48,900 You're our only chance! 801 01:03:50,300 --> 01:03:54,300 - You're a pussy, Wyler! - Do it for Marty's torso! 802 01:03:58,000 --> 01:03:59,600 You got butterflies, huh? 803 01:04:00,100 --> 01:04:01,100 Who are you? 804 01:04:08,900 --> 01:04:10,100 I'm the wise janitor. 805 01:04:10,700 --> 01:04:13,800 I impart knowledge and help overcome fears. 806 01:04:14,000 --> 01:04:16,200 I also replace the urinal cakes. 807 01:04:16,400 --> 01:04:19,000 I'm here to help you get your throw back. 808 01:04:19,900 --> 01:04:21,900 - How did you...? - I've been watching. 809 01:04:22,100 --> 01:04:26,600 During practice, in the hallways, in the lockers, taking a shower... 810 01:04:26,900 --> 01:04:29,800 ...whipping boys with a wet towel. 811 01:04:30,100 --> 01:04:34,600 - Can tell you kind of like that. - Hey! Let's get back to the throw. 812 01:04:34,800 --> 01:04:37,600 What happened to Marty wasn't your fault. 813 01:04:37,800 --> 01:04:40,100 - Really? - Okay, it was. 814 01:04:40,400 --> 01:04:42,300 But you got to get over it. 815 01:04:42,500 --> 01:04:44,800 It could've happened to anybody. 816 01:04:45,000 --> 01:04:48,500 Anybody that disobeyed the coach and the team... 817 01:04:48,700 --> 01:04:53,600 ...and threw to a 90-pound kid who shouldn't have been on the field. 818 01:04:53,800 --> 01:04:57,700 Stop! How is any of this supposed to be helping me? 819 01:04:57,900 --> 01:04:59,900 Right. Forget what I said. 820 01:05:00,200 --> 01:05:04,800 You got to go out there, believe in the ball and throw yourself. 821 01:05:05,200 --> 01:05:07,400 You can do it. 822 01:05:11,900 --> 01:05:14,100 I'm going out there. 823 01:05:20,400 --> 01:05:24,000 Only 25 seconds remaining, and the season... 824 01:05:24,200 --> 01:05:28,500 ...rests in the hands of fourth-string quarterback Jake Wyler. 825 01:05:28,700 --> 01:05:31,800 Translation: We're shit out of luck. 826 01:05:32,200 --> 01:05:33,500 Give me a W! 827 01:05:34,600 --> 01:05:36,700 Give me a Y! 828 01:05:36,900 --> 01:05:40,100 Give me a... Lick my pussy ass cock shit! 829 01:05:40,900 --> 01:05:43,500 Lick my pussy ass cock shit! 830 01:05:47,800 --> 01:05:49,000 Blue 83! 831 01:05:49,200 --> 01:05:51,500 - Blue 83! - Reggie Ray? 832 01:05:51,700 --> 01:05:53,700 I reckon I'm feeling better. 833 01:05:53,900 --> 01:05:55,300 Set! Hut! 834 01:06:39,800 --> 01:06:40,900 Shit. 835 01:06:55,200 --> 01:06:59,700 That has to be the worst pass I've ever seen, ever. 836 01:07:01,900 --> 01:07:03,900 What the hell was that? 837 01:07:32,100 --> 01:07:33,300 Jake? 838 01:07:35,900 --> 01:07:37,200 Jake. 839 01:07:39,000 --> 01:07:40,200 Hey. 840 01:07:40,900 --> 01:07:44,300 - You did great out there. - I blew the game, Janey. 841 01:07:44,600 --> 01:07:46,000 I let everyone down. 842 01:07:46,200 --> 01:07:51,000 It's just a football game, Jake. Besides... 843 01:07:52,200 --> 01:07:54,100 ...you didn't let me down. 844 01:07:54,700 --> 01:07:55,800 Really? 845 01:07:57,300 --> 01:08:00,000 Jake, you've taught me to be myself. 846 01:08:00,200 --> 01:08:03,200 You never saw me as the girl in glasses. 847 01:08:03,500 --> 01:08:06,000 Don't forget the paint-covered overalls. 848 01:08:06,200 --> 01:08:08,900 Right, you never noticed those either. 849 01:08:10,000 --> 01:08:12,400 You taught me a lot about myself too. 850 01:08:13,000 --> 01:08:17,200 Oh, Jake. Nothing could ever come between us now. 851 01:08:21,300 --> 01:08:23,500 Nothing could ever come between us now. 852 01:08:23,700 --> 01:08:24,900 Jake Wyler. 853 01:08:26,700 --> 01:08:30,100 Congratulations. You blew my perfect season. 854 01:08:30,400 --> 01:08:34,300 - Ser You-Blew-My-Perfect-Season. - What do you want, Austin? 855 01:08:34,500 --> 01:08:35,500 A life. 856 01:08:37,200 --> 01:08:38,700 And payback. 857 01:08:39,100 --> 01:08:42,300 - Come on, don't do this. - No, I'll hang around. 858 01:08:42,500 --> 01:08:47,400 Maybe tell Janey a little S-E-C-R-A-T-P... 859 01:08:50,900 --> 01:08:52,600 What's going on? 860 01:08:52,800 --> 01:08:54,500 Austin. 861 01:08:54,700 --> 01:08:55,800 This isn't funny! 862 01:08:57,400 --> 01:08:58,400 No. 863 01:08:59,800 --> 01:09:01,000 I don't believe it. 864 01:09:01,300 --> 01:09:05,900 I said I'd turn you into prom queen when I thought you were ugly... 865 01:09:06,100 --> 01:09:11,600 ...the girl with no friends who was dirt poor and smelled a little funky. 866 01:09:11,800 --> 01:09:14,200 Look, I made a mistake. 867 01:09:14,500 --> 01:09:18,600 If I could go back, I never would've made that stupid bet. 868 01:09:21,800 --> 01:09:23,900 What bet? 869 01:09:26,900 --> 01:09:30,400 I never said anything about a bet. 870 01:09:40,300 --> 01:09:41,500 All I said was: 871 01:09:41,700 --> 01:09:43,600 " I'm pretending to whisper... 872 01:09:43,800 --> 01:09:48,900 ...so Jake thinks I'm telling you a secret and will confess... 873 01:09:49,200 --> 01:09:54,600 ...revealing a secret and confirming everything I whispered in your ear." 874 01:10:20,500 --> 01:10:23,900 I wish I didn't make that bet 875 01:10:24,100 --> 01:10:27,700 That's not the guy I want to be 876 01:10:27,900 --> 01:10:31,400 If I could just turn back the clock 877 01:10:31,600 --> 01:10:36,500 Then Janey would still be with me 878 01:10:39,500 --> 01:10:42,600 Tell me, Mom, what should I do? 879 01:10:43,000 --> 01:10:44,400 I love this boy 880 01:10:44,700 --> 01:10:49,600 But he has been untrue 881 01:10:52,300 --> 01:10:55,400 I'll do my best to make things right 882 01:10:56,200 --> 01:10:59,900 I wish we could resolve this fight 883 01:11:00,700 --> 01:11:02,500 It could happen 884 01:11:02,800 --> 01:11:04,200 It could happen 885 01:11:04,400 --> 01:11:08,500 - At the prom tonight - At the prom tonight 886 01:11:14,100 --> 01:11:17,000 I'm getting pussy no matter what 887 01:11:17,300 --> 01:11:20,000 Even if it with dirty slut 888 01:11:20,300 --> 01:11:22,900 True love is what I want the most 889 01:11:23,100 --> 01:11:26,700 I just jerked off in your French toast 890 01:11:27,300 --> 01:11:31,800 So what if we have the same mother 891 01:11:33,200 --> 01:11:38,300 Tonight I'm gonna fuck my brother 892 01:11:38,700 --> 01:11:41,500 In a few hours I'll be queen of the prom 893 01:11:44,500 --> 01:11:48,100 I've been an alcoholic Since my first tour in Nam 894 01:11:50,400 --> 01:11:54,200 I asked Janey to the prom And she doesn't know why 895 01:11:56,600 --> 01:12:00,200 I'm only in the song because I'm a black guy 896 01:12:03,600 --> 01:12:08,400 I have no money I have to make my own dress 897 01:12:10,200 --> 01:12:15,200 Look at me, my breasts are perky, yes 898 01:12:16,000 --> 01:12:19,000 I'm gonna win her back No matter what it takes 899 01:12:19,200 --> 01:12:23,900 Here I go, I'm gonna Forget about Jake 900 01:12:27,300 --> 01:12:29,100 Prom tonight 901 01:12:31,200 --> 01:12:33,000 Prom tonight 902 01:12:34,500 --> 01:12:35,900 Prom tonight 903 01:12:41,400 --> 01:12:44,000 It's gonna happen, gonna happen 904 01:12:47,700 --> 01:12:52,200 At the prom 905 01:12:54,700 --> 01:12:55,700 Tonight 906 01:13:18,300 --> 01:13:19,500 Hi, Ricky. 907 01:13:19,700 --> 01:13:21,500 Thanks. See you in English. 908 01:13:21,700 --> 01:13:23,800 Oh, but we're graduated. 909 01:13:24,000 --> 01:13:26,700 All right, can you...? I'm not... No, can you take it ba...? 910 01:13:26,900 --> 01:13:29,100 Can you please not...? All right. 911 01:13:38,900 --> 01:13:44,900 When I was a freshman, I threw 176 touchdown passes. 912 01:13:45,200 --> 01:13:50,500 My sophomore year, I ran 14 in on my own with a sprained ankle... 913 01:13:50,700 --> 01:13:55,000 ...a broken phalange, a ruptured duodenum and subdermal haematoma. 914 01:13:55,600 --> 01:13:57,700 When I was a junior, I won the science fair... 915 01:13:57,900 --> 01:14:00,000 ...for running a Volkswagen Bug off a potato. 916 01:14:00,200 --> 01:14:06,800 Most recently, I was a star of the Greco-Roman Wrestling Federation. 917 01:14:24,900 --> 01:14:27,100 I bet she great bonk. 918 01:14:27,400 --> 01:14:30,700 Excuse me, Bruce? No. You don't bonk Amanda Becker. 919 01:14:31,300 --> 01:14:35,100 You make sweet, sweet love to her. 920 01:14:35,800 --> 01:14:38,000 Amanda Becker's like a flower. 921 01:14:38,700 --> 01:14:40,200 You smell her. 922 01:14:40,400 --> 01:14:42,300 You touch her gently. 923 01:14:42,900 --> 01:14:47,400 You admire the beauty. You watch it blossom. 924 01:14:48,100 --> 01:14:52,500 And you thank God he created something so perfect. 925 01:14:55,300 --> 01:14:56,700 Go to her. 926 01:15:09,300 --> 01:15:11,300 Be strong, Mitch! 927 01:15:24,500 --> 01:15:27,200 What do you expect from me? 928 01:15:27,800 --> 01:15:32,400 - Do you think I'll have sex with you? - No! You don't understand. 929 01:15:32,600 --> 01:15:34,700 Because I am not a cheap slut. 930 01:15:34,900 --> 01:15:39,400 I don't screw every pathetic guy that gives me a letter. 931 01:15:41,600 --> 01:15:44,100 I give them hand jobs. 932 01:15:51,800 --> 01:15:55,400 - Want to dance? - Only if we're horizontal. 933 01:15:56,000 --> 01:15:58,600 I totally heard that. 934 01:16:11,900 --> 01:16:14,000 We're dancing. 935 01:16:35,300 --> 01:16:36,400 It's funny. 936 01:16:36,600 --> 01:16:40,500 You'd never suspect everyone here is a professional dancer. 937 01:16:54,700 --> 01:16:56,000 Oh, God. No. 938 01:16:56,300 --> 01:16:58,400 I want to do it here on the dance floor. 939 01:16:58,600 --> 01:16:59,700 Janey! 940 01:16:59,900 --> 01:17:03,700 Don't you forget our deal. She wins, you're mine. 941 01:17:15,500 --> 01:17:19,600 And now the moment every popular guy who's made a bet... 942 01:17:19,800 --> 01:17:24,400 ...to turn a rebellious girl into prom queen has been waiting for: 943 01:17:24,600 --> 01:17:27,900 The announcement of the prom king and queen. 944 01:17:28,200 --> 01:17:30,700 This year's prom king is... 945 01:17:31,400 --> 01:17:32,400 Marty! 946 01:17:33,100 --> 01:17:35,400 ...Jake Wyler! 947 01:17:49,800 --> 01:17:51,200 Way to go, Jake! 948 01:17:51,800 --> 01:17:54,700 This year's prom queen is... 949 01:17:54,900 --> 01:17:56,800 You got it, Priscilla! 950 01:17:57,000 --> 01:17:59,900 I don't believe it. It's a tie. 951 01:18:00,100 --> 01:18:01,400 A tie? 952 01:18:01,700 --> 01:18:03,300 - Holy shit! - Oh, my God. 953 01:18:05,000 --> 01:18:07,300 Your new prom queens are... 954 01:18:08,800 --> 01:18:12,200 - ...Kara and Sara Fratelli. - Fuck. 955 01:18:13,300 --> 01:18:17,100 - Oh, my God! - They deserve it. 956 01:18:19,500 --> 01:18:20,800 Congratulations! 957 01:18:23,200 --> 01:18:26,800 There we go! Your king and queen. 958 01:18:33,100 --> 01:18:36,200 I say we make like a tree and branch... 959 01:18:37,200 --> 01:18:39,200 ...out of here. 960 01:18:40,600 --> 01:18:42,200 All right, Kara and Sara. 961 01:18:42,500 --> 01:18:46,100 Now it is traditional for the king and queen... 962 01:18:46,300 --> 01:18:49,900 - ...to share a ceremonial dance. - Come here. 963 01:18:51,200 --> 01:18:56,200 Put your heads on my shoulder 964 01:19:00,400 --> 01:19:02,000 You smell good. 965 01:19:15,600 --> 01:19:16,900 Janey! 966 01:19:21,700 --> 01:19:23,900 Do you know where Austin went? 967 01:19:24,100 --> 01:19:28,100 I know he rented a room at the Sunrise Motel. Room number six. 968 01:19:28,300 --> 01:19:32,500 Past the ice dispenser. Hit the Pepsi machine, you went too far. 969 01:19:32,700 --> 01:19:35,200 Oh, and the door will not be locked. 970 01:19:37,300 --> 01:19:39,200 That's all I know. 971 01:19:40,400 --> 01:19:42,300 Thanks, Malik. 972 01:19:44,000 --> 01:19:48,800 You're intelligent and insightful. You don't get the respect you deserve. 973 01:19:51,600 --> 01:19:53,800 You really mean that, Jake? 974 01:19:54,000 --> 01:19:57,200 That's great! I've always wanted to discuss... 975 01:19:57,400 --> 01:19:59,700 I actually got to go. Sorry. 976 01:20:00,000 --> 01:20:01,100 Motherfucker. 977 01:20:01,300 --> 01:20:03,100 Hold it right there, mister. 978 01:20:03,600 --> 01:20:08,900 I am not going to let you hurt Janey again, okay? Besides, I love her. 979 01:20:09,100 --> 01:20:10,200 Well, so do I. 980 01:20:11,100 --> 01:20:15,800 But I'm the best friend, and I've been in front of her the whole time... 981 01:20:16,000 --> 01:20:20,200 ...and she just doesn't realize it yet, but she will. 982 01:20:20,600 --> 01:20:24,100 I'm the cool guy who's learned the error of his ways. 983 01:20:24,500 --> 01:20:27,800 She'll forgive my mistakes and realize I love her. 984 01:20:29,600 --> 01:20:31,100 Damn it. That's true. 985 01:20:46,100 --> 01:20:49,300 Why's this door locked? It's a fire hazard! 986 01:21:04,600 --> 01:21:06,600 Get out of the road! 987 01:21:06,900 --> 01:21:08,300 Hey, watch it, man! 988 01:21:09,500 --> 01:21:11,800 She's not attracted to you! 989 01:21:12,500 --> 01:21:14,200 She doesn't love you! 990 01:21:15,200 --> 01:21:17,700 You'll never be more than a friend! 991 01:21:18,800 --> 01:21:20,900 Two dollars! 992 01:21:30,000 --> 01:21:32,200 Ice dispenser. 993 01:21:32,400 --> 01:21:33,700 Six. 994 01:21:34,200 --> 01:21:38,300 Yeah! I'll make you forget all about losing prom queen. 995 01:21:38,500 --> 01:21:42,000 Tell me who your daddy is! Tell me who your papa is! 996 01:21:44,600 --> 01:21:46,800 Get off her, man! 997 01:21:47,100 --> 01:21:48,200 Priscilla. 998 01:21:48,400 --> 01:21:49,900 Don't move. 999 01:21:54,800 --> 01:21:57,500 - What's going on? - Something beautiful. 1000 01:21:58,500 --> 01:22:01,700 - Where's Janey? - Miss Run-Home-to-My-Daddy... 1001 01:22:01,900 --> 01:22:04,700 ...ran home to her daddy. 1002 01:22:05,600 --> 01:22:09,200 - That's for taking Janey to the prom. - You put the... 1003 01:22:09,400 --> 01:22:14,200 - That's for hurting her at the party! - This is really turning me on. 1004 01:22:14,700 --> 01:22:17,500 That's for being really weird. 1005 01:22:17,700 --> 01:22:19,200 Thank you. 1006 01:22:24,700 --> 01:22:27,100 I don't know what that was for. 1007 01:22:35,300 --> 01:22:39,400 - Oh, me so horny. - Oh, me so horny. 1008 01:22:41,100 --> 01:22:45,500 You nerd who can't get pussy from American girl? 1009 01:22:45,700 --> 01:22:47,800 You smart cookie. How you know? 1010 01:22:48,000 --> 01:22:49,600 I know. 1011 01:22:49,800 --> 01:22:54,500 You follow me, I give you sucky-sucky. 1012 01:22:58,400 --> 01:23:01,200 Hey! What's everybody standing around for? 1013 01:23:01,500 --> 01:23:03,900 Come on. Join the fun! 1014 01:23:06,200 --> 01:23:08,000 Watch me! 1015 01:23:09,100 --> 01:23:11,400 Get footloose everybody! Yeah! 1016 01:23:11,600 --> 01:23:14,400 One, two, three. Come on, you can... 1017 01:23:15,100 --> 01:23:16,800 Kick him in the butt! 1018 01:23:22,700 --> 01:23:24,400 Hello. 1019 01:23:26,300 --> 01:23:27,400 Hi. 1020 01:23:28,800 --> 01:23:32,200 I never thought I'd hear myself say this... 1021 01:23:32,600 --> 01:23:38,100 ...but for once, I wish I could meet a nice, sensitive guy... 1022 01:23:38,300 --> 01:23:41,100 ...who wanted more than just sex. 1023 01:23:42,700 --> 01:23:45,400 That is very admirable. 1024 01:23:48,300 --> 01:23:51,000 I wish a guy would take me out for dinner. 1025 01:23:51,600 --> 01:23:53,200 I feel the same way. 1026 01:23:55,400 --> 01:23:57,100 And for once... 1027 01:23:59,200 --> 01:24:03,400 ...I wish a guy would take a dump on my chest. 1028 01:24:05,500 --> 01:24:07,400 That is appalling. 1029 01:24:11,700 --> 01:24:13,700 That really upsets me. 1030 01:24:15,200 --> 01:24:19,200 I can't believe nobody's ever taken a dump on your chest. 1031 01:24:22,900 --> 01:24:24,500 Will you be that guy? 1032 01:24:31,300 --> 01:24:34,800 It would be an honour and a privilege. 1033 01:24:45,400 --> 01:24:47,200 Janey! 1034 01:24:50,500 --> 01:24:51,500 Hello? 1035 01:24:52,500 --> 01:24:54,300 Is anybody home? 1036 01:24:54,900 --> 01:24:57,300 Get down! Enemy fire! 1037 01:24:58,700 --> 01:25:00,400 Mr. Briggs? 1038 01:25:00,600 --> 01:25:03,600 Excuse me, sir. Do you know where Janey is? 1039 01:25:03,800 --> 01:25:08,300 She went out there. On her own. There's Charlie everywhere. 1040 01:25:08,800 --> 01:25:11,200 Right. Do you know where she went? 1041 01:25:11,600 --> 01:25:14,200 Couldn't take it. Went to the airport. 1042 01:25:14,400 --> 01:25:19,100 Something about Paris. Her tour was over. 1043 01:25:19,400 --> 01:25:21,600 Paris. Thank you, sir. 1044 01:25:22,100 --> 01:25:25,700 I need ammo! I can't hold them off much longer! 1045 01:25:33,600 --> 01:25:35,600 She's not here. 1046 01:25:35,800 --> 01:25:37,900 Went to the airport. 1047 01:25:39,100 --> 01:25:40,500 Thanks. 1048 01:25:40,700 --> 01:25:42,400 You're welcome. 1049 01:25:48,900 --> 01:25:51,900 Off the road, you glasses and ponytail freak! 1050 01:26:05,100 --> 01:26:06,400 Two dollars! 1051 01:26:06,600 --> 01:26:08,800 - Two dollars! - Two dollars! 1052 01:26:15,200 --> 01:26:17,300 Next stop, airport. 1053 01:26:17,600 --> 01:26:22,100 The red zone is for the loading and unloading of passengers. 1054 01:26:22,400 --> 01:26:23,800 No parking. 1055 01:26:24,000 --> 01:26:25,200 Attention, please. 1056 01:26:25,500 --> 01:26:30,800 All red Porsche 944s parked in the white zone will be towed immediately. 1057 01:26:36,100 --> 01:26:39,600 Paris Air, flight 805 to art school in Paris... 1058 01:26:39,800 --> 01:26:42,100 ...from gate 122, is now boarding. 1059 01:26:55,600 --> 01:26:57,900 Excuse me, everyone! 1060 01:26:58,500 --> 01:27:02,700 There's a girl boarding a plane right now to Paris that I love. 1061 01:27:04,400 --> 01:27:08,000 If I don't get there in time and tell her how I feel... 1062 01:27:08,200 --> 01:27:10,800 ...I may never see her again. 1063 01:27:14,700 --> 01:27:15,800 Go get her, son. 1064 01:27:16,900 --> 01:27:18,200 Good luck, young man. 1065 01:27:20,700 --> 01:27:22,400 - Go get her! - Go for it. 1066 01:27:25,000 --> 01:27:26,400 Oh, hell, just go. 1067 01:27:29,200 --> 01:27:30,300 Freeze, bitch! 1068 01:27:41,200 --> 01:27:43,700 You're bleeding on my suitcase. 1069 01:27:49,700 --> 01:27:51,000 Excuse me! 1070 01:27:52,100 --> 01:27:53,500 Excuse me, everyone! 1071 01:27:54,100 --> 01:27:59,500 There's a girl about to board a plane to Paris right now that I love... 1072 01:27:59,700 --> 01:28:03,300 We already heard that one. Asshole. 1073 01:28:05,200 --> 01:28:08,800 This is the final call for Paris Air flight 805 to art school... 1074 01:28:10,300 --> 01:28:12,600 ...departing from gate 122. 1075 01:28:12,800 --> 01:28:14,400 Janey! 1076 01:28:15,500 --> 01:28:17,700 Hey, shithead, that's mine. 1077 01:28:17,900 --> 01:28:19,200 Give it back! 1078 01:28:19,600 --> 01:28:23,900 Just believe in the ball, Jake. And throw yourself. 1079 01:28:24,700 --> 01:28:25,900 Yeah. 1080 01:28:35,500 --> 01:28:36,500 Yes! 1081 01:28:36,700 --> 01:28:38,100 Nice shot, Jake. 1082 01:28:40,600 --> 01:28:41,700 - Jake? - Janey. 1083 01:28:42,000 --> 01:28:44,400 Thank God I got to you in time. Listen to me. 1084 01:28:44,800 --> 01:28:47,000 I'm not going to let you go to Paris. 1085 01:28:47,700 --> 01:28:50,400 - This is the final call... - Why not? 1086 01:28:50,600 --> 01:28:52,800 ...for flight 805 to art school. 1087 01:28:53,100 --> 01:28:58,700 If you're finding words to stop a girl from leaving, now would be the time. 1088 01:28:58,900 --> 01:29:00,500 Janey... 1089 01:29:02,000 --> 01:29:05,700 ...I made that bet before I knew you. 1090 01:29:07,100 --> 01:29:09,300 Before I really knew me. 1091 01:29:11,200 --> 01:29:12,400 Oh, Jake. 1092 01:29:14,400 --> 01:29:16,200 Okay, hold it right there. 1093 01:29:20,400 --> 01:29:23,600 Tell me you didn't quote Freddie Prinze Jr. 1094 01:29:25,600 --> 01:29:29,300 I knew it. That was a line from She's All That. 1095 01:29:29,600 --> 01:29:32,100 I masturbate to that movie. 1096 01:29:35,500 --> 01:29:36,500 Do you mind? 1097 01:29:36,700 --> 01:29:39,700 No, not at all. Masturbation's very healthy. 1098 01:29:39,900 --> 01:29:41,500 No, stay out of it. 1099 01:29:41,700 --> 01:29:43,800 Oh, I'm sorry. I just had to say something. 1100 01:29:44,000 --> 01:29:46,000 I couldn't help myself. Go on. 1101 01:29:46,200 --> 01:29:47,700 Thank you. 1102 01:29:48,500 --> 01:29:53,700 Janey, you said you couldn't believe in someone that didn't believe in you. 1103 01:29:53,900 --> 01:29:57,900 Well, I believed in you. I always believed in you. 1104 01:29:59,100 --> 01:30:00,300 Oh, Jake. 1105 01:30:01,100 --> 01:30:04,900 Oh, God. I can't believe you fell for that crap. 1106 01:30:05,100 --> 01:30:07,600 - That's Pretty in Pink. - Are you sure? 1107 01:30:08,300 --> 01:30:09,500 Trust me. 1108 01:30:09,700 --> 01:30:15,000 - Excuse me. What are you doing? - Let me give you some advice, Jake. 1109 01:30:15,200 --> 01:30:19,100 Lose the I'm-the-cute-and-sensitive- popular-boy routine. 1110 01:30:19,300 --> 01:30:20,400 It's pathetic. 1111 01:30:20,600 --> 01:30:23,900 And tell Janey what's true in your heart. 1112 01:30:24,100 --> 01:30:25,900 Stop being such a little bitch. 1113 01:30:27,600 --> 01:30:28,800 But I was just trying to... 1114 01:30:29,000 --> 01:30:31,800 Don't even use that eyebrow move on me. It's not gonna work. 1115 01:30:32,000 --> 01:30:33,500 You do overuse that move. 1116 01:30:33,700 --> 01:30:35,100 And you. 1117 01:30:35,300 --> 01:30:39,000 Miss Other-Side-of-the-Tracks- Awkward-Rebel-With-Glasses. 1118 01:30:39,400 --> 01:30:44,000 Wise up to Jake's bullshit. Stop being such a dumb-ass. 1119 01:30:47,500 --> 01:30:48,900 She's right. 1120 01:30:49,600 --> 01:30:51,800 - Janey... - Yes, Jake? 1121 01:30:54,500 --> 01:30:58,000 Maybe you should get on that plane and go to Paris. 1122 01:30:59,400 --> 01:31:03,100 Well, if you stay, we really only have the summer. 1123 01:31:03,300 --> 01:31:07,600 Then I go to college. We'll spend the occasional weekend together. 1124 01:31:07,800 --> 01:31:09,500 Which is nice. 1125 01:31:09,700 --> 01:31:14,200 But chances are, one night I'll get wrecked and have sex with some girl. 1126 01:31:14,400 --> 01:31:16,400 You'll call me a slut. 1127 01:31:16,600 --> 01:31:19,900 I'll call you a cock-tease, and we'll break up. 1128 01:31:20,100 --> 01:31:23,800 So when you really think about it, what's the point? 1129 01:31:26,800 --> 01:31:33,200 Well, that wasn't exactly the kind of truth I was expecting. 1130 01:31:34,300 --> 01:31:38,600 But I'm not gonna fall for it. How big a dumb-ass do you think I am? 1131 01:31:39,300 --> 01:31:42,400 You obviously stole that from Karate Kid. 1132 01:31:42,600 --> 01:31:44,400 No, actually, I... 1133 01:31:45,000 --> 01:31:47,900 Jake, it's okay. 1134 01:31:48,100 --> 01:31:49,800 I love you too. 1135 01:31:50,000 --> 01:31:51,800 We all know where this is going. 1136 01:31:52,000 --> 01:31:54,600 Fucking teenagers. 1137 01:32:04,200 --> 01:32:05,400 This is it. 1138 01:32:05,600 --> 01:32:07,100 The right moment. 1139 01:32:22,400 --> 01:32:23,900 Son of a bitch! 1140 01:32:40,600 --> 01:32:44,000 Well, Mitch, I learned a very valuable lesson. 1141 01:32:44,200 --> 01:32:47,200 I realized I don't really wanna get involved with a girl... 1142 01:32:47,400 --> 01:32:49,300 ...unless I'm really in love with her. 1143 01:32:50,800 --> 01:32:52,300 Yeah. 1144 01:32:53,500 --> 01:32:56,600 Nice try, Ox. We know you took it in the ass. 1145 01:32:58,400 --> 01:33:01,900 Believe it or not, I, too, learned a valuable lesson. 1146 01:33:02,100 --> 01:33:04,300 Bruce, your accent. What happened? 1147 01:33:04,600 --> 01:33:07,200 You see, I realized that the best way to get the girl... 1148 01:33:07,400 --> 01:33:09,000 ...is to just be yourself. 1149 01:33:09,200 --> 01:33:13,200 For most people that would be a very valuable lesson. 1150 01:33:13,400 --> 01:33:16,300 But in your case, I'd stick to being Chinese. 1151 01:33:16,500 --> 01:33:17,900 Japanese. 1152 01:33:18,100 --> 01:33:19,500 So, what'd you learn last night? 1153 01:33:20,000 --> 01:33:23,200 Gentlemen, I learned the greatest lesson of all. 1154 01:33:23,400 --> 01:33:25,800 That unlike everyone else in these teen movies... 1155 01:33:26,000 --> 01:33:29,000 ...I don't wanna learn some dumb-ass valuable lesson. 1156 01:33:29,200 --> 01:33:30,600 I still wanna fuck! 1157 01:33:30,800 --> 01:33:33,000 - Hey. - All right. 1158 01:39:32,400 --> 01:39:33,900 Ready? 1159 01:39:34,100 --> 01:39:36,100 And action! 1160 01:39:36,300 --> 01:39:38,400 Come on, Austin. 1161 01:39:39,700 --> 01:39:42,400 - Holy shit! - I'm a fucking god! 85062

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