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This is the story of
a town called Crowley Heights,
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00:00:18,373 --> 00:00:20,544
which was founded by Satanists
back in the 1960s
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00:00:20,610 --> 00:00:21,745
when Satan was still cool.
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00:00:21,843 --> 00:00:25,047
It all started at Crowley High,
where high school stoner
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00:00:25,114 --> 00:00:28,751
Todd Smith lusted after
hottie Jenny Kolinsky.
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00:00:28,817 --> 00:00:32,054
The metal dudes convinced Todd
to use the Book of Pure Evil
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00:00:32,122 --> 00:00:34,825
to win her heart
and get in those panties.
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00:00:34,891 --> 00:00:39,596
But instead, Todd was possessed
by the power of pure evil.
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00:00:39,662 --> 00:00:43,100
He was defeated by Jenny
and Todd's best dude, Curtis,
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00:00:43,166 --> 00:00:46,436
but the book flew away
before they could destroy it.
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00:00:46,502 --> 00:00:49,402
Todd, with the help of Jenny
and Curtis,
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00:00:49,404 --> 00:00:51,407
along with science
nerd Hannah,
13
00:00:51,474 --> 00:00:53,908
and strong, handsome, sexy
Jimmy the Janitor...
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00:00:53,910 --> 00:00:55,076
that's me...
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00:00:55,078 --> 00:00:58,114
fought off the power
of pure evil week after week.
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00:00:58,181 --> 00:01:00,747
Along the way, Todd learned
he was destined to be
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00:01:00,749 --> 00:01:03,719
the Pure Evil One
who would destroy the world
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00:01:03,787 --> 00:01:07,523
with the power of
the Book of Pure Evil.
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00:01:07,623 --> 00:01:10,960
But someone else wished to be
the Pure Evil One:
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00:01:11,026 --> 00:01:15,698
Crowley High School guidance
counsellor Atticus P. Murphy,
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00:01:15,764 --> 00:01:18,100
who cut off his father's head
to seize control of
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00:01:18,168 --> 00:01:21,538
the Satanic society
that founded Crowley Heights.
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00:01:21,603 --> 00:01:24,106
The metal dudes found out Todd
had to lose his virginity
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00:01:24,174 --> 00:01:26,209
in order to become
the Pure Evil One,
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00:01:26,275 --> 00:01:29,545
so they set him up
with hot metal chick Nikki,
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00:01:29,612 --> 00:01:31,581
who turned out to be
my old girlfriend.
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00:01:31,647 --> 00:01:33,950
And then, she turned out
to be the metal dudes
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00:01:34,016 --> 00:01:36,786
all supernaturally combined
into one.
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00:01:36,853 --> 00:01:39,890
With the help of his newest
and dumbest minion yet,
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00:01:39,956 --> 00:01:41,455
Elliot Everwood,
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00:01:41,457 --> 00:01:43,058
Atticus used
the Book of Pure Evil
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00:01:43,126 --> 00:01:44,791
to become a man-goat
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00:01:44,793 --> 00:01:47,596
and challenge Todd
to an epic battle
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00:01:47,663 --> 00:01:50,631
at the Crowley High
Semi-Formal.
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00:01:50,633 --> 00:01:52,803
The metal dudes forced
Todd to use the book
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00:01:52,868 --> 00:01:54,570
to become the
Pure Evil One,
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00:01:54,636 --> 00:01:55,969
and he almost destroyed
the world.
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00:01:55,971 --> 00:01:58,973
But Jenny professed
her love for him,
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00:01:58,975 --> 00:02:01,244
so he trapped Atticus
in the book
40
00:02:01,311 --> 00:02:04,114
and sent it away where
no one could find it.
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00:02:04,180 --> 00:02:06,016
Everything ended awesome,
until they found out
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00:02:06,082 --> 00:02:08,148
that somehow
it killed Hannah.
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00:02:10,018 --> 00:02:11,819
Curtis blamed Todd
for Hannah's death,
44
00:02:11,821 --> 00:02:13,824
and the gang
broke up.
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00:02:15,224 --> 00:02:17,994
With the book gone, I was
free to leave the school
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00:02:18,060 --> 00:02:20,596
for the first time in
16 years.
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00:02:20,662 --> 00:02:22,496
So, I decided to
see the world.
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00:02:22,498 --> 00:02:23,500
The end.
49
00:02:24,833 --> 00:02:26,602
But was it really the end?
50
00:02:26,668 --> 00:02:29,873
Deep below the Crowley Heights
Retirement Home,
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00:02:29,939 --> 00:02:34,477
something was stirring.
52
00:02:59,702 --> 00:03:02,639
What is it that
you seek?
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00:03:02,704 --> 00:03:05,207
The Demon Cube
of True Pain?
54
00:03:05,274 --> 00:03:08,041
The Unholy Grail
of Sumatra?
55
00:03:08,043 --> 00:03:11,212
The spillings of
a boy wizard?
56
00:03:11,214 --> 00:03:12,649
A plate of bad dates?
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00:03:14,284 --> 00:03:16,887
You know what I want.
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00:03:16,952 --> 00:03:18,821
Then you know the price.
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00:03:18,887 --> 00:03:19,587
Do I ever!
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00:03:19,589 --> 00:03:21,324
Let me just get
my mouth wet.
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00:03:22,992 --> 00:03:24,960
Ew, just take it.
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00:03:26,929 --> 00:03:29,900
Finally, I, Elliot Everwood,
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00:03:29,965 --> 00:03:33,066
after travelling far and wide
chasing every clue,
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00:03:33,068 --> 00:03:35,238
spending every last cent
of my trust fund
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00:03:35,304 --> 00:03:38,040
and countless blow jobs
have found
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00:03:38,107 --> 00:03:41,711
the Book of Pure Evil.
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00:03:59,995 --> 00:04:03,931
♪ Oh, I got me a heart
full of sorrow ♪
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00:04:03,933 --> 00:04:08,103
♪ Ever since
I sent the book away ♪
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00:04:08,171 --> 00:04:12,105
♪ Hard to look forward
to tomorrow ♪
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00:04:12,107 --> 00:04:17,146
♪ Going to feel
exactly like I do today ♪
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00:04:17,213 --> 00:04:21,384
♪ Oh, I sure ain't feeling
very metal ♪
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00:04:21,450 --> 00:04:25,955
♪ Got the guilts,
because of Hannah B. ♪
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00:04:26,022 --> 00:04:29,959
♪ I sure do miss
Jenny and Curtis ♪
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00:04:30,026 --> 00:04:33,997
♪ But they're much better off
without me ♪
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00:04:36,800 --> 00:04:41,801
♪ Things are really, really
really fucked up ♪
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00:04:41,803 --> 00:04:46,808
♪ Really, really, really
fucked up ♪
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00:04:46,810 --> 00:04:51,811
♪ Oh, my life has gotten
awfully quiet ♪
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00:04:51,813 --> 00:04:56,820
♪ I think I might be feeling
kind of bored ♪
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00:04:56,885 --> 00:05:00,322
♪ I sure do miss fighting evil
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00:05:00,389 --> 00:05:05,161
♪ Spilling blood
and breaking down doors ♪
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00:05:07,997 --> 00:05:12,332
♪ Oh, I sure do hate
that Todd Smith ♪
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00:05:12,334 --> 00:05:15,437
♪ He doggone ruined my life
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00:05:15,505 --> 00:05:20,343
♪ Not sure how he did it
84
00:05:20,409 --> 00:05:24,380
♪ That shit rooster killed
my future wife ♪
85
00:05:27,349 --> 00:05:32,351
♪ We're feeling really, really
really fucked up ♪
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00:05:32,353 --> 00:05:36,159
♪ Really, really, really
fucked up ♪
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00:05:36,224 --> 00:05:37,893
Yup.
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00:05:46,034 --> 00:05:49,202
"Reditus Meus, Dominus Domino,
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00:05:49,204 --> 00:05:52,207
ad Mihi."
Ugh!
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00:05:55,445 --> 00:05:56,413
Aah!
91
00:06:01,450 --> 00:06:05,021
Holy motherfucking,
whore-porking shit-fucker.
92
00:06:05,087 --> 00:06:07,856
Hey, Mr. M.
Welcome back.
93
00:06:07,923 --> 00:06:11,094
I feel so slimy.
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00:06:11,159 --> 00:06:13,128
Let me help
with that.
95
00:06:19,235 --> 00:06:20,400
So soft.
96
00:06:20,402 --> 00:06:22,838
How does this feel?
97
00:06:22,904 --> 00:06:26,008
Um, weird.
98
00:06:26,075 --> 00:06:27,844
Oh, Mr. M.,
there's nothing weird about
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00:06:27,909 --> 00:06:30,212
a young boy bathing
a naked man.
100
00:06:30,279 --> 00:06:31,346
Relax.
101
00:06:31,413 --> 00:06:34,050
I'm quite capable
of un-sliming myself.
102
00:06:34,116 --> 00:06:37,186
Shh, shh, you're
babbling incoherently.
103
00:06:37,252 --> 00:06:40,389
So, what was it like
being inside the book?
104
00:06:40,455 --> 00:06:42,124
I bet it was
pretty neat.
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00:06:42,190 --> 00:06:43,292
Neat?
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00:06:43,358 --> 00:06:46,228
You're asking me
if being trapped
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00:06:46,295 --> 00:06:50,433
inside the Book of Pure Evil
was neat?
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00:06:55,103 --> 00:06:56,770
Maybe the wolf wasn't so bad.
109
00:06:56,772 --> 00:06:58,808
The important thing is
you're home, Mr. M.
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00:06:58,875 --> 00:07:00,043
Safe and sound.
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00:07:00,108 --> 00:07:02,044
Now we can get to work
on re-establishing
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00:07:02,111 --> 00:07:03,880
our Satanic society
that will bring forth
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00:07:03,945 --> 00:07:05,481
a new and glorious age
of Satanism.
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00:07:05,548 --> 00:07:08,114
A society in which you will be
the exalted leader
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00:07:08,116 --> 00:07:10,052
and I your faithful servant.
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00:07:10,118 --> 00:07:12,788
Yeah.
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00:07:12,854 --> 00:07:14,490
Here's the thing, Elliot:
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00:07:14,557 --> 00:07:18,061
I've been to the world
beyond the book,
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00:07:18,127 --> 00:07:20,263
and it's changed me.
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00:07:20,329 --> 00:07:23,800
From this day forward,
Atticus P. Murphy, Jr.
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00:07:23,865 --> 00:07:26,969
Will be a good
man, a kind man.
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00:07:27,036 --> 00:07:28,971
A... not evil man.
123
00:07:29,738 --> 00:07:31,137
What are you
saying, Mr. M?
124
00:07:31,139 --> 00:07:33,075
I'm saying that
I hereby denounce Satanism.
125
00:07:35,144 --> 00:07:36,513
No! Mr. M.,
you can't.
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00:07:36,579 --> 00:07:39,516
Do you know what I had to do
to find that book?
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00:07:39,582 --> 00:07:41,416
No idea.
See you.
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00:07:41,483 --> 00:07:44,484
You can't leave now.
I need you, Mr. M.
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00:07:44,486 --> 00:07:46,121
Satan needs you.
130
00:07:46,188 --> 00:07:50,489
Satan can
go fuck himself.
131
00:07:50,491 --> 00:07:52,325
You don't mean that.
132
00:07:52,327 --> 00:07:54,263
You're still babbling
incoherently.
133
00:07:54,329 --> 00:07:56,099
Just think it over,
Mr. M., okay?
134
00:07:57,033 --> 00:07:58,998
And call me, you have
my cell number.
135
00:07:59,000 --> 00:08:00,969
No, wait, I have
a new number.
136
00:08:01,036 --> 00:08:02,971
I'll just text it
to you.
137
00:08:03,538 --> 00:08:06,276
Who will be my
evil leader now?
138
00:08:06,341 --> 00:08:08,978
That's weird.
The thread from the vest
139
00:08:09,045 --> 00:08:11,181
goes all the way back to
the book.
140
00:08:11,247 --> 00:08:12,346
Probably means nothing.
141
00:08:27,195 --> 00:08:29,298
Ow.
142
00:08:29,365 --> 00:08:30,867
Hey, Jenny.
143
00:08:30,933 --> 00:08:32,635
Sorry I haven't
talked to you
144
00:08:32,702 --> 00:08:34,404
since the funeral.
145
00:08:34,469 --> 00:08:36,505
No, it's okay, Todd.
146
00:08:36,571 --> 00:08:39,441
I've been sort of
avoiding you, too.
147
00:08:41,008 --> 00:08:42,478
So, um,
148
00:08:42,545 --> 00:08:45,515
how does it feel
to be pure evil?
149
00:08:45,580 --> 00:08:48,050
It's surprisingly no different
than before.
150
00:08:48,117 --> 00:08:50,053
I don't know
if that's good or bad,
151
00:08:50,118 --> 00:08:52,055
but at least
the Book of Pure Evil
152
00:08:52,121 --> 00:08:54,324
is gone for good,
so it doesn't really matter.
153
00:08:54,390 --> 00:08:55,592
Yeah.
154
00:08:55,657 --> 00:08:57,594
Now that we're not
fighting evil anymore,
155
00:08:57,660 --> 00:09:01,061
life has become very...
boring.
156
00:09:01,063 --> 00:09:04,534
Well, maybe we can start
focusing on...
157
00:09:04,599 --> 00:09:06,536
other things.
158
00:09:06,602 --> 00:09:08,605
Like us.
159
00:09:08,671 --> 00:09:11,237
I mean, it felt like
there was almost an "us"
160
00:09:11,239 --> 00:09:12,507
at the semi-formal,
and then...
161
00:09:12,575 --> 00:09:14,574
So much has happened to us all,
Todd.
162
00:09:14,576 --> 00:09:16,577
I think we just need some time
to...
163
00:09:17,579 --> 00:09:19,949
Whoa, that's weird.
164
00:09:20,016 --> 00:09:21,351
Totally weird.
165
00:09:21,416 --> 00:09:23,417
Curtis hasn't played with
dolls since Grade 7.
166
00:09:23,419 --> 00:09:25,054
Look at it, Todd.
167
00:09:25,121 --> 00:09:27,055
It's supposed to
be Hannah.
168
00:09:27,123 --> 00:09:28,291
Oh, great.
169
00:09:28,357 --> 00:09:30,927
Now my best friend
has gone bat-shit crazy.
170
00:09:30,993 --> 00:09:32,561
Like I don't feel
guilty enough.
171
00:09:32,627 --> 00:09:35,531
Poor Curtis,
he's obviously grieving.
172
00:09:35,598 --> 00:09:38,133
Have you talked to him
since the funeral?
173
00:09:38,200 --> 00:09:39,598
No.
174
00:09:39,600 --> 00:09:42,437
I still think he blames me
for what happened to Hannah.
175
00:09:42,504 --> 00:09:44,438
Maybe he's ready
to forgive you?
176
00:09:44,440 --> 00:09:45,642
Hey, Curtis.
177
00:09:53,516 --> 00:09:53,950
Whoa!
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00:09:54,016 --> 00:09:54,950
Ow.
179
00:09:55,017 --> 00:09:56,451
Sorry, Jenny.
180
00:09:56,518 --> 00:09:59,087
That finger wasn't
meant for you.
181
00:10:05,627 --> 00:10:09,165
Ah, back to being
a guidance counsellor,
182
00:10:09,230 --> 00:10:11,133
which is
what I used to be.
183
00:10:11,367 --> 00:10:13,969
And will be again,
starting now.
184
00:10:15,704 --> 00:10:18,638
Jimmy the Janitor?
185
00:10:18,640 --> 00:10:21,110
But you're a
janitor, Jimmy.
186
00:10:21,176 --> 00:10:24,413
Well, if it isn't my old
nemesis, Atticus Murphy.
187
00:10:24,479 --> 00:10:26,481
I thought you were trapped
inside the book.
188
00:10:26,549 --> 00:10:27,483
I got out.
189
00:10:27,550 --> 00:10:29,651
And just for the record,
I'm not your nemesis.
190
00:10:29,719 --> 00:10:31,688
That's the metal dudes.
Mine was more Todd,
191
00:10:31,753 --> 00:10:34,523
and before that, kind of my dad
and Minion Number One.
192
00:10:34,589 --> 00:10:35,691
Where were we?
193
00:10:35,757 --> 00:10:37,627
It's like this, dude.
194
00:10:37,693 --> 00:10:40,430
After being trapped
in the school for 16 years,
195
00:10:40,496 --> 00:10:43,433
I thought it was time to explore
the modern world, all right?
196
00:10:43,498 --> 00:10:45,368
But the modern world
is too complicated
197
00:10:45,434 --> 00:10:47,303
and too scary for
this dude.
198
00:10:47,369 --> 00:10:49,671
Hey, did you know you need
a high school diploma
199
00:10:49,738 --> 00:10:52,338
to get a decent job anywhere
but Crowley High?
200
00:10:52,340 --> 00:10:54,142
I didn't ask for
your life story.
201
00:10:54,209 --> 00:10:57,446
I just want to know
why are you in my office
202
00:10:57,512 --> 00:10:59,449
and sitting in
my chair?
203
00:10:59,515 --> 00:11:02,618
And wearing my
sweater vest!
204
00:11:02,685 --> 00:11:05,121
Look, just because you
have a fancy "dipoma"
205
00:11:05,186 --> 00:11:08,021
doesn't mean you're a better
guidance counsellor than me.
206
00:11:08,023 --> 00:11:12,027
Of course it does,
and it's "diploma."
207
00:11:13,594 --> 00:11:14,730
Oh, wait.
208
00:11:14,796 --> 00:11:17,132
It actually does say
"dipoma."
209
00:11:17,199 --> 00:11:18,700
Hmm.
210
00:11:18,767 --> 00:11:22,305
I never noticed they
misspelled "guidance," too.
211
00:11:22,371 --> 00:11:22,972
And "counsellor."
212
00:11:23,039 --> 00:11:24,071
Let me help you, Atticus.
213
00:11:24,073 --> 00:11:26,743
As a guidance counsellor,
which is what you were,
214
00:11:26,809 --> 00:11:30,376
let me tell you that you have to
stop trying to kill the students
215
00:11:30,378 --> 00:11:31,211
at Crowley High.
216
00:11:31,213 --> 00:11:33,047
I assure you,
those days are over.
217
00:11:33,049 --> 00:11:36,216
You are looking
at a changed man, a gentler man.
218
00:11:36,218 --> 00:11:38,820
I'm the only one who can help
these stupid little shits
219
00:11:38,887 --> 00:11:40,723
with their
stupid little problems.
220
00:11:40,790 --> 00:11:43,055
Now, get out of
my office,
221
00:11:43,057 --> 00:11:44,526
you toilet-scrubber.
222
00:11:50,398 --> 00:11:53,335
Well played, Jimmy.
223
00:11:53,401 --> 00:11:55,338
Well played.
224
00:11:55,403 --> 00:11:57,606
I guess I'll be
on my way,
225
00:11:57,672 --> 00:12:00,108
now that there's
no place for me anymore
226
00:12:00,175 --> 00:12:01,610
at Crowley High.
227
00:12:01,676 --> 00:12:04,413
The janitor position
hasn't been filled yet.
228
00:12:04,479 --> 00:12:08,749
You want me to be
a janitor?
229
00:12:14,422 --> 00:12:15,757
A janitor!
230
00:12:17,926 --> 00:12:19,592
Is the pay any good?
231
00:12:19,594 --> 00:12:21,596
Dude, it pays more than
this job.
232
00:12:22,831 --> 00:12:25,734
Hand me that box
of urinal cakes.
233
00:12:26,134 --> 00:12:28,101
I can't believe
how long it's taken
234
00:12:28,103 --> 00:12:29,472
to find a new
cheerleading squad.
235
00:12:29,537 --> 00:12:31,541
I have a feeling
we're going to have
236
00:12:31,607 --> 00:12:33,108
a long and substantial
career together.
237
00:12:33,175 --> 00:12:34,609
Got to
find Mr. M.
238
00:12:34,676 --> 00:12:35,610
Huh?
239
00:12:35,677 --> 00:12:37,813
Must turn Mr. M.
Back to evil.
240
00:12:37,879 --> 00:12:40,649
Must show him that evil is good.
241
00:12:40,715 --> 00:12:42,651
Nice sweater.
242
00:12:42,718 --> 00:12:44,620
Argh!
243
00:12:44,686 --> 00:12:46,755
Eat my yarn.
244
00:12:52,294 --> 00:12:55,264
I was only being
half-sarcastic.
245
00:12:59,468 --> 00:13:01,137
I'm coming for
you, Mr. M.
246
00:13:01,203 --> 00:13:04,138
I'm fucking coming!
247
00:13:04,140 --> 00:13:07,175
Oh, blow-up doll Hannah,
I know you're not real,
248
00:13:07,243 --> 00:13:09,809
but you're the realest thing
I have to the real Hannah.
249
00:13:09,811 --> 00:13:13,313
So, I guess that makes you
the new real Hannah,
250
00:13:13,315 --> 00:13:15,618
'cause the old real
Hannah is gone.
251
00:13:15,684 --> 00:13:18,818
Whoa, so confused.
252
00:13:18,820 --> 00:13:22,825
Here, eat your corn chips.
You're skin and bones.
253
00:13:23,624 --> 00:13:25,427
Do we really have
to do this?
254
00:13:25,493 --> 00:13:27,562
He's our friend
and he needs us.
255
00:13:29,797 --> 00:13:31,267
Curtis, we have to talk.
256
00:13:31,333 --> 00:13:32,868
You can talk to me,
Jenny.
257
00:13:32,935 --> 00:13:35,537
I'm not talking to the dude
who killed my girlfriend.
258
00:13:35,603 --> 00:13:37,873
Come on, dude.
It was an accident.
259
00:13:37,940 --> 00:13:39,876
None of us even know
how Hannah died.
260
00:13:39,941 --> 00:13:42,344
You can't hate me
forever, can you?
261
00:13:42,411 --> 00:13:44,313
I'm not talking
to you, dude,
262
00:13:44,379 --> 00:13:48,316
and yes, I can hate you forever
and I will... forever.
263
00:13:48,383 --> 00:13:49,685
So, you are
talking to me.
264
00:13:49,752 --> 00:13:52,221
Let's smoke a taco bong
and be friends again.
265
00:13:52,287 --> 00:13:54,222
Jenny, tell Todd
that I can hear him
266
00:13:54,290 --> 00:13:55,855
but I choose
not to hear him,
267
00:13:55,857 --> 00:13:57,857
and that as much as
I'd really like
268
00:13:57,859 --> 00:13:59,228
to smoke a taco bong,
269
00:13:59,295 --> 00:14:00,863
I refuse to smoke it
with him.
270
00:14:00,930 --> 00:14:03,465
Tell him
I'll smoke it later,
271
00:14:03,531 --> 00:14:05,868
by myself.
272
00:14:05,935 --> 00:14:07,969
Ow, ow!
273
00:14:08,036 --> 00:14:09,906
Uh, what's the matter
with your arm?
274
00:14:09,972 --> 00:14:11,974
I don't have Hannah
to maintain it anymore,
275
00:14:12,041 --> 00:14:14,576
so it's falling apart.
276
00:14:14,642 --> 00:14:17,647
She used to be so good at
lubricating my joints,
277
00:14:17,713 --> 00:14:20,213
and then you killed her.
278
00:14:20,215 --> 00:14:22,651
How many times am I
supposed to say "I'm sorry"?
279
00:14:22,718 --> 00:14:24,654
I don't think
you even said it once.
280
00:14:24,719 --> 00:14:26,689
Well, you never gave me
the chance.
281
00:14:29,858 --> 00:14:32,561
Oh, you mean now?
Oh, okay.
282
00:14:32,627 --> 00:14:36,331
Curtis, I'm so sorry
that somehow,
283
00:14:36,397 --> 00:14:37,730
when I sent
the book away,
284
00:14:37,732 --> 00:14:39,935
it had something to do with
killing Hannah.
285
00:14:40,002 --> 00:14:42,604
I never meant to hurt her
or anyone.
286
00:14:42,671 --> 00:14:44,239
You got to believe
me, dude.
287
00:14:46,941 --> 00:14:49,244
You're killing her
again!
288
00:14:49,310 --> 00:14:51,745
Oh, shit.
Hold on.
289
00:14:51,747 --> 00:14:53,716
This time, I'll
save her, dude.
290
00:14:53,781 --> 00:14:56,582
I promise.
291
00:14:57,752 --> 00:14:59,522
Now you're having sex
with her?
292
00:14:59,588 --> 00:15:01,390
No wonder you're
the Pure Evil One.
293
00:15:01,456 --> 00:15:04,259
It's because your evil
is so pure.
294
00:15:05,324 --> 00:15:05,961
Curtis,
that is not Hannah.
295
00:15:06,027 --> 00:15:07,593
That is
an icky sex doll.
296
00:15:07,595 --> 00:15:09,798
Don't call my sex doll
a sex doll.
297
00:15:09,864 --> 00:15:12,033
I mean, don't call
my Hannah a Hannah.
298
00:15:12,100 --> 00:15:14,436
No, I mean, don't
sex doll my Hannah.
299
00:15:14,502 --> 00:15:15,972
Icky sex doll,
sticky-icky...
300
00:15:16,037 --> 00:15:18,438
You get a hold
of yourself.
301
00:15:18,440 --> 00:15:22,612
Dudes, it's time to forgive
and get the gang back together.
302
00:15:23,278 --> 00:15:25,278
What do you
say, dude?
303
00:15:25,280 --> 00:15:27,448
All right, but I'm not
talking to you.
304
00:15:27,450 --> 00:15:28,251
You just did.
305
00:15:28,316 --> 00:15:30,652
Stop messing with my
mind, Todd.
306
00:15:30,719 --> 00:15:32,588
I was only being
half-sarcastic.
307
00:15:32,655 --> 00:15:33,990
Wanda, what happened?
308
00:15:34,055 --> 00:15:37,493
Some sweater-vest douchebag
dismembered my squad
309
00:15:37,559 --> 00:15:38,958
with razor-sharp yarn.
310
00:15:38,960 --> 00:15:40,495
Sweater vest?
311
00:15:40,561 --> 00:15:41,930
Atticus
Murphy, Jr?
312
00:15:41,997 --> 00:15:43,962
He must have found some way
to escape
313
00:15:43,964 --> 00:15:45,334
being trapped
in the book.
314
00:15:45,401 --> 00:15:46,967
The book is back.
315
00:15:46,969 --> 00:15:49,635
I don't get it.
How can the book be back?
316
00:15:49,637 --> 00:15:52,639
I used all my power
to banish it
317
00:15:52,641 --> 00:15:53,909
forever.
318
00:15:53,975 --> 00:15:55,010
It doesn't matter.
319
00:15:55,076 --> 00:15:56,911
We find Atticus,
we find the book.
320
00:15:59,515 --> 00:16:00,980
You want to
find Atticus,
321
00:16:00,982 --> 00:16:02,816
you should check
the girls' shit shack.
322
00:16:02,818 --> 00:16:05,021
Jimmy, when did
you get back?
323
00:16:05,086 --> 00:16:08,322
This morning.
I'm the new guidance counsellor.
324
00:16:08,324 --> 00:16:10,825
So far, I think I'm doing
a pretty good job.
325
00:16:10,892 --> 00:16:12,961
Uh, my squad
was sliced and diced
326
00:16:13,027 --> 00:16:14,430
by a polyester-fibre psychopath.
327
00:16:14,496 --> 00:16:15,998
Well, cut me some
slack, all right?
328
00:16:16,065 --> 00:16:17,496
It's my first day.
329
00:16:17,498 --> 00:16:20,368
Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
330
00:16:21,402 --> 00:16:24,373
All right, Atticus.
You can do this.
331
00:16:24,440 --> 00:16:27,008
For now at least, until you
return to your true destiny:
332
00:16:27,075 --> 00:16:29,377
guidance counselling.
333
00:16:29,445 --> 00:16:31,414
Okay, here goes.
334
00:16:34,648 --> 00:16:37,552
Ack, who am I kidding?
I can't do this.
335
00:16:37,618 --> 00:16:38,988
What have I become?
336
00:16:39,054 --> 00:16:41,390
Is giving up a life of evil
really worth
337
00:16:41,456 --> 00:16:42,624
cleaning up
teenage bowel movements?
338
00:16:43,791 --> 00:16:44,893
What was that?
339
00:16:44,959 --> 00:16:49,031
Huh? Hello?
340
00:16:49,098 --> 00:16:52,968
Oh, Mr. M., how it
saddens me to see you like this.
341
00:16:53,035 --> 00:16:55,036
This is so beneath you.
342
00:16:55,103 --> 00:16:57,573
Oh, Elliot.
343
00:16:57,638 --> 00:17:00,075
The bottom of my barrel
is bottomless.
344
00:17:00,142 --> 00:17:01,810
You're no
toilet-scrubber, Mr. M.
345
00:17:01,877 --> 00:17:02,877
You are evil.
346
00:17:02,945 --> 00:17:05,715
You know it,
I know it, we know it.
347
00:17:05,780 --> 00:17:08,149
How many times do I have to
tell you, Elliot?
348
00:17:08,217 --> 00:17:09,151
I have forsaken evil.
349
00:17:09,218 --> 00:17:12,353
Lies, lies, lies!
350
00:17:13,020 --> 00:17:15,724
You shouldn't be in here,
Elliot.
351
00:17:15,790 --> 00:17:18,057
This is the girls' washroom,
you know?
352
00:17:18,059 --> 00:17:21,396
Where they do their
number twos.
353
00:17:21,462 --> 00:17:23,398
Lies, lies, lies!
354
00:17:30,573 --> 00:17:33,109
Mr. M., remember the
Book of Pure Evil?
355
00:17:33,174 --> 00:17:35,911
It's all you ever wanted.
It can make you evil again.
356
00:17:35,978 --> 00:17:37,546
No, I won't read
it again.
357
00:17:37,613 --> 00:17:38,078
Atticus?
358
00:17:38,080 --> 00:17:38,911
Todd!
359
00:17:38,913 --> 00:17:40,746
My new favourite
teenage delinquent.
360
00:17:40,748 --> 00:17:42,517
Elliot, is that you?
361
00:17:42,584 --> 00:17:43,486
Oh, hey, guys.
362
00:17:43,552 --> 00:17:45,521
Sorry to disappoint you,
but Mr. M. is mine.
363
00:17:45,586 --> 00:17:46,919
So, you can all
just, uh...
364
00:17:46,921 --> 00:17:48,123
fuck off!
365
00:17:48,190 --> 00:17:50,526
Oh, well, Atticus is
doomed, we tried.
366
00:17:50,592 --> 00:17:51,727
Save your former
guidance counsellor.
367
00:17:51,794 --> 00:17:53,094
And why would we do that?
368
00:17:53,161 --> 00:17:55,096
You tried to kill us
at the semi-formal.
369
00:17:55,163 --> 00:17:56,731
Only because
you hurt my feelings.
370
00:17:56,798 --> 00:17:58,931
All I ever wanted was
to be your friend
371
00:17:58,933 --> 00:18:00,735
and help out once
in a while.
372
00:18:00,803 --> 00:18:03,037
Looks like you're doing
a great job, buddy.
373
00:18:03,104 --> 00:18:05,607
Mr. M., you want
to help them?
374
00:18:05,673 --> 00:18:07,709
They're the enemy.
375
00:18:07,776 --> 00:18:10,645
You betrayer!
376
00:18:10,711 --> 00:18:13,949
I worshipped you, Mr. M.,
but the whole time
377
00:18:14,016 --> 00:18:15,985
you just wanted to be
friends with them.
378
00:18:24,959 --> 00:18:27,796
Now I will destroy
your precious friends.
379
00:18:29,765 --> 00:18:32,799
You showed me how good
it was to be evil, Mr. M.,
380
00:18:32,801 --> 00:18:35,604
and now I'll show you
just how good I can be.
381
00:18:35,671 --> 00:18:37,672
Um, I mean good
at being evil.
382
00:18:46,215 --> 00:18:48,480
Not so fast, Elliot.
383
00:18:48,482 --> 00:18:48,917
Hannah!
384
00:18:48,984 --> 00:18:49,919
You're alive!
385
00:18:49,985 --> 00:18:51,487
I didn't kill you.
386
00:18:51,553 --> 00:18:52,988
But I will.
387
00:19:14,276 --> 00:19:15,276
Yoink.
388
00:19:15,344 --> 00:19:16,677
No!
389
00:19:39,634 --> 00:19:41,536
Just like old times.
390
00:19:41,603 --> 00:19:43,671
You haven't seen
the last of me,
391
00:19:43,738 --> 00:19:46,741
because I'm not dead.
392
00:19:57,219 --> 00:19:58,754
Yep, he's dead.
393
00:19:58,819 --> 00:20:01,022
I'm not so sure.
394
00:20:02,623 --> 00:20:04,056
Okay, now I'm sure.
395
00:20:04,058 --> 00:20:05,560
You're alive!
396
00:20:05,626 --> 00:20:06,561
Did I miss something?
397
00:20:06,628 --> 00:20:07,196
Hannah died.
398
00:20:07,261 --> 00:20:08,663
Now she's back
to life.
399
00:20:08,729 --> 00:20:12,200
Sounds like
one crazy cliff-hanger.
400
00:20:12,267 --> 00:20:14,670
I don't really remember
anything,
401
00:20:14,736 --> 00:20:16,906
except dying at
the semi-formal
402
00:20:16,971 --> 00:20:19,072
and then saving you
from Elliot today.
403
00:20:19,074 --> 00:20:22,244
Everything else
is like a blurry dream.
404
00:20:22,311 --> 00:20:24,613
I have a bad feeling
about all this.
405
00:20:24,680 --> 00:20:27,283
The Book of Pure Evil is back,
and so is Atticus.
406
00:20:27,348 --> 00:20:29,916
And who knows why Hannah
is back from the dead?
407
00:20:29,918 --> 00:20:32,287
All that matters
is that Hannah is alive.
408
00:20:32,353 --> 00:20:35,123
If the book coming back
has something to do with it,
409
00:20:35,190 --> 00:20:36,755
then fine: bring it on.
410
00:20:36,757 --> 00:20:37,927
Yeah.
Bring it on.
411
00:20:37,992 --> 00:20:39,928
Woo-hoo.
412
00:20:41,796 --> 00:20:42,931
Hey, gang of kids.
413
00:20:42,998 --> 00:20:44,700
Just because we
saved your life
414
00:20:44,766 --> 00:20:46,101
doesn't mean we've
forgiven you, Atticus.
415
00:20:46,168 --> 00:20:47,870
But you don't understand.
416
00:20:47,936 --> 00:20:49,872
Over there, in the land
beyond the book,
417
00:20:49,938 --> 00:20:51,806
I saw what pure
evil really was.
418
00:20:51,873 --> 00:20:55,244
I had an epiphany:
if I ever were to escape,
419
00:20:55,309 --> 00:20:57,378
I would pledge my life
to fighting evil
420
00:20:57,446 --> 00:21:01,183
and keeping those who fight evil
safe, and that means you.
421
00:21:04,919 --> 00:21:07,156
Nice speech, just stay
away from us, buddy.
422
00:21:07,221 --> 00:21:09,057
She called me "buddy."
I'm back in!
423
00:21:09,123 --> 00:21:10,892
It was a figure of speech,
chief.
424
00:21:10,959 --> 00:21:12,894
"Chief"? I'm the head
of the gang now?
425
00:21:12,960 --> 00:21:13,895
Get out of here!
426
00:21:13,961 --> 00:21:15,663
I'm getting mixed messages.
427
00:21:15,730 --> 00:21:16,864
Out.
428
00:21:20,436 --> 00:21:23,405
Well, I don't know
what happened,
429
00:21:23,471 --> 00:21:26,075
but I guess I did
somehow kill you, Hannah.
430
00:21:26,141 --> 00:21:29,178
I didn't mean it,
but I'm sorry anyhow.
431
00:21:29,244 --> 00:21:30,980
That's okay, Todd.
432
00:21:31,046 --> 00:21:32,815
I'm back now,
for whatever reason.
433
00:21:32,881 --> 00:21:34,850
We'll get to the bottom
of what happened.
434
00:21:34,915 --> 00:21:37,251
Together.
435
00:21:37,318 --> 00:21:40,021
Aw,
how sweet.
436
00:21:40,087 --> 00:21:41,022
Barf.
437
00:21:41,088 --> 00:21:42,957
You assholes.
438
00:21:43,025 --> 00:21:44,759
Have you been there
the whole time?
439
00:21:44,825 --> 00:21:46,795
We're very stealthy.
440
00:21:46,862 --> 00:21:48,764
Looks like everything
is back to normal;
441
00:21:48,830 --> 00:21:50,132
only now,
442
00:21:50,198 --> 00:21:53,035
something
is different.
443
00:21:53,101 --> 00:21:55,704
Now we can get
in the school.
444
00:21:55,770 --> 00:21:58,706
Which means your life
is going to suck donkey balls,
445
00:21:58,774 --> 00:21:59,671
losers.
446
00:21:59,673 --> 00:22:01,844
It doesn't matter if I'm
the Pure Evil One
447
00:22:01,910 --> 00:22:03,277
and that the book
is back.
448
00:22:03,344 --> 00:22:06,714
I'm not going to destroy
the world for you or anyone.
449
00:22:06,782 --> 00:22:10,019
Old news, loser.
450
00:22:10,084 --> 00:22:12,351
There's a new
Pure Evil One
451
00:22:12,353 --> 00:22:13,389
in Crowley Heights.
452
00:22:13,455 --> 00:22:15,290
And this one
is going to destroy
453
00:22:15,356 --> 00:22:16,991
you and your gang
454
00:22:17,058 --> 00:22:18,691
before destroying
the world.
455
00:22:42,084 --> 00:22:45,219
The recordings
of Drs. Williams and Williams,
456
00:22:45,286 --> 00:22:47,719
tape number 221.
457
00:22:47,721 --> 00:22:51,859
The Hannah Project is
continuing, but inconclusive.
458
00:22:51,927 --> 00:22:54,329
Each subsequent subject
contains more DNA of the book
459
00:22:54,395 --> 00:22:56,864
than the previous.
460
00:23:13,248 --> 00:23:16,351
Todd.
461
00:23:16,418 --> 00:23:18,754
Todd?
462
00:23:18,819 --> 00:23:20,054
Huh?
463
00:23:20,122 --> 00:23:21,289
What?
464
00:23:21,355 --> 00:23:23,791
Todd.
465
00:23:23,859 --> 00:23:25,861
T-T-Todd.
466
00:23:25,927 --> 00:23:29,298
Todd,
467
00:23:29,363 --> 00:23:33,302
you know you want me.
468
00:23:33,367 --> 00:23:36,304
Yes, yes, I do.
469
00:23:36,371 --> 00:23:40,109
But I've found someone else.
470
00:24:00,295 --> 00:24:03,332
Pizza
face, pizza face.
471
00:24:03,398 --> 00:24:05,067
Pizza face.
472
00:24:05,132 --> 00:24:07,902
Really original, guys.
I get it.
473
00:24:07,969 --> 00:24:10,905
I have acne.
I've heard it before,
474
00:24:10,971 --> 00:24:12,471
and for your information,
475
00:24:12,473 --> 00:24:16,010
it's caused by an increase
of testosterone,
476
00:24:16,076 --> 00:24:18,144
which means that
I got bigger balls
477
00:24:18,146 --> 00:24:22,982
than any of you!
478
00:24:22,984 --> 00:24:24,486
What's his problem?
479
00:24:24,987 --> 00:24:27,022
I doubt he's got bigger balls
than me.
480
00:24:27,087 --> 00:24:29,257
I've got testicular
elephantiasis.
481
00:24:29,324 --> 00:24:32,060
Ignore him.
Let's just eat our pizza face.
482
00:24:39,401 --> 00:24:41,135
Yeah, it's pizza,
and the face.
483
00:24:42,336 --> 00:24:45,005
Come on!
484
00:24:45,007 --> 00:24:46,975
Stupid thing.
485
00:24:47,042 --> 00:24:48,977
Okay, um...
486
00:24:54,382 --> 00:24:55,517
Huh.
487
00:25:00,054 --> 00:25:04,125
You're getting very sleepy.
488
00:25:04,191 --> 00:25:05,326
No, I'm not.
489
00:25:05,392 --> 00:25:07,328
Are you sure
this is going to work?
490
00:25:07,394 --> 00:25:09,565
If you do it wrong,
you'll fry her brain.
491
00:25:09,631 --> 00:25:11,566
Atticus did this to me
and brought back
492
00:25:11,632 --> 00:25:14,303
all my repressed memories
of Todd cutting off my arm
493
00:25:14,369 --> 00:25:15,337
with a table saw.
494
00:25:15,402 --> 00:25:17,905
And then you tried to kill
me, see? Brain fry.
495
00:25:17,972 --> 00:25:20,007
Shut up, Todd.
Let him try it.
496
00:25:20,075 --> 00:25:21,373
Let's start with
something simple.
497
00:25:21,375 --> 00:25:23,377
What's your name?
498
00:25:23,444 --> 00:25:25,012
Even I know that one.
499
00:25:25,080 --> 00:25:27,416
Hannah, Hannah D.
Williams.
500
00:25:27,481 --> 00:25:29,584
Don't you mean
Hannah B. Williams?
501
00:25:29,651 --> 00:25:32,153
Way to go, Curtis.
You've totally fried her brain.
502
00:25:32,219 --> 00:25:34,219
I don't know what
I'm doing wrong.
503
00:25:35,055 --> 00:25:39,026
I am getting very
sleep... Ooh.
504
00:25:46,234 --> 00:25:49,271
All this cleaning up is really
cutting into my "me" time.
505
00:26:00,248 --> 00:26:02,250
It has
begun anew.
506
00:26:02,316 --> 00:26:04,051
Corn chips?
507
00:26:04,119 --> 00:26:06,121
Anew.
508
00:26:10,924 --> 00:26:12,193
The nerve of
those guys.
509
00:26:12,259 --> 00:26:14,429
I'm the one who has to clean
that glass.
510
00:26:14,496 --> 00:26:15,898
Get out.
511
00:26:18,098 --> 00:26:22,203
Okay, it's been a while.
How do we do this again?
512
00:26:22,269 --> 00:26:24,305
Maybe Hannah can give us
a science-y explanation
513
00:26:24,372 --> 00:26:26,074
of what happened.
514
00:26:26,141 --> 00:26:30,077
Um, it looks like
their face is melted off?
515
00:26:30,144 --> 00:26:32,146
Thanks, Hannah.
Real science-y.
516
00:26:32,212 --> 00:26:34,148
Hmm, even I'm
not impressed.
517
00:26:34,215 --> 00:26:36,151
This has to have
something to do with
518
00:26:36,217 --> 00:26:38,152
the new Pure Evil One
in Crowley Heights.
519
00:26:38,219 --> 00:26:40,389
Those metal dudes are just
fucking with you, Todd.
520
00:26:40,455 --> 00:26:41,590
This is classic
book activity.
521
00:26:41,655 --> 00:26:43,621
Some jerk used the book,
522
00:26:43,623 --> 00:26:45,623
and now he's melting off
people's faces.
523
00:26:45,625 --> 00:26:47,293
But I just don't
get it.
524
00:26:47,295 --> 00:26:49,163
If I'm the all-powerful
Pure Evil One,
525
00:26:49,229 --> 00:26:52,233
then when I sent the book away
it should have gone away
526
00:26:52,299 --> 00:26:54,633
forever.
527
00:26:54,635 --> 00:26:56,504
Just where did you
send it away
528
00:26:56,571 --> 00:26:58,470
forever?
529
00:26:58,472 --> 00:27:00,441
Oh, dude,
I'm a genius.
530
00:27:00,507 --> 00:27:02,311
I sent it away
to this imaginary,
531
00:27:02,376 --> 00:27:04,680
made-up place that no one
could ever find.
532
00:27:04,746 --> 00:27:07,479
And just what is the name of
this imaginary place?
533
00:27:07,481 --> 00:27:10,518
Timbuktu.
534
00:27:10,584 --> 00:27:12,586
Um, Timbuktu is
a real place.
535
00:27:12,653 --> 00:27:13,755
What?
536
00:27:13,822 --> 00:27:16,190
But it sounds
so made up.
537
00:27:16,257 --> 00:27:17,526
It's located in
538
00:27:17,592 --> 00:27:19,324
the West African nation
of Mali.
539
00:27:19,326 --> 00:27:20,993
Well, at least you're still
geography-y.
540
00:27:20,995 --> 00:27:23,131
Genius, Todd,
genius.
541
00:27:23,198 --> 00:27:25,700
No time to dwell on
your incredible deep stupidity.
542
00:27:25,767 --> 00:27:27,501
The book is back
on the loose,
543
00:27:27,568 --> 00:27:29,704
and we're the only ones
who can stop it.
544
00:27:29,770 --> 00:27:31,172
Yeah, that's great
and all,
545
00:27:31,238 --> 00:27:33,275
but I've got other
stuff to do.
546
00:27:33,341 --> 00:27:34,008
Have fun.
547
00:27:34,075 --> 00:27:35,110
Hannah?
548
00:27:35,176 --> 00:27:36,511
Wait!
549
00:27:38,412 --> 00:27:40,512
Uh, Jenny?
550
00:27:40,514 --> 00:27:44,652
The book is back and our
lives are in danger.
551
00:27:44,719 --> 00:27:46,455
Doesn't that turn
you on?
552
00:27:46,520 --> 00:27:47,588
Whoa.
553
00:27:47,654 --> 00:27:49,657
You've been totally hands-off
since the semi-formal,
554
00:27:49,723 --> 00:27:51,559
and now you want
to get sexy?
555
00:27:51,625 --> 00:27:53,525
I don't know
what it is.
556
00:27:53,527 --> 00:27:56,198
Maybe it's the danger.
557
00:27:56,264 --> 00:27:59,301
The fact that we could die
at any moment.
558
00:27:59,366 --> 00:28:03,704
It was so boring
with the book gone, but now...
559
00:28:03,771 --> 00:28:06,340
Where's your boner?
560
00:28:08,375 --> 00:28:11,043
You always have a boner
when I'm around.
561
00:28:18,184 --> 00:28:19,520
Hannah, where are
you going?
562
00:28:19,586 --> 00:28:22,423
The gang needs you.
I need you.
563
00:28:22,489 --> 00:28:24,390
Is this about
the inflatable sex doll?
564
00:28:24,392 --> 00:28:27,560
Because I swear,
she never touched me.
565
00:28:27,562 --> 00:28:29,398
I don't know, Curtis.
It's just...
566
00:28:29,463 --> 00:28:31,599
I feel like it's time
I did something else.
567
00:28:31,665 --> 00:28:32,564
Oh, I get it.
568
00:28:32,566 --> 00:28:34,502
You're going to go do
something science-y
569
00:28:34,568 --> 00:28:36,070
behind the scenes
to help out.
570
00:28:36,136 --> 00:28:36,902
No, Curtis.
571
00:28:36,904 --> 00:28:37,838
I'm not doing anything
science-y.
572
00:28:37,905 --> 00:28:40,508
I'm not interested
in science-y anymore.
573
00:28:40,575 --> 00:28:42,411
Not even pseudo-science-y?
574
00:28:42,477 --> 00:28:45,080
I'm tired of being
the same old Hannah.
575
00:28:45,145 --> 00:28:47,181
I want to try
something new.
576
00:28:47,248 --> 00:28:48,749
But I like the
same old Hannah.
577
00:28:48,816 --> 00:28:51,751
I died, Curtis,
but somehow I came back.
578
00:28:51,753 --> 00:28:53,755
I don't want to waste
a second chance
579
00:28:53,822 --> 00:28:55,420
by doing the same
old things.
580
00:28:55,422 --> 00:28:58,226
I never had a chance to be
a regular teenage girl
581
00:28:58,293 --> 00:28:59,795
because we were always
fighting the book.
582
00:28:59,861 --> 00:29:02,430
Now, I have
my chance.
583
00:29:02,831 --> 00:29:04,595
You have an inflatable
sex doll?
584
00:29:04,597 --> 00:29:07,101
I did, but Todd
killed her.
585
00:29:07,168 --> 00:29:08,804
She looked just
like you.
586
00:29:08,870 --> 00:29:10,472
Ugh!
587
00:29:14,676 --> 00:29:17,379
Dissension in the gang.
588
00:29:17,444 --> 00:29:19,513
Maybe this is my
way back in.
589
00:29:20,648 --> 00:29:23,782
Something is wrong
with my dick, Jimmy.
590
00:29:23,784 --> 00:29:27,889
It doesn't seem to be
working right.
591
00:29:27,956 --> 00:29:30,622
You know, when I'm horny.
592
00:29:30,624 --> 00:29:33,295
You got a bad case
of limp dick, huh?
593
00:29:33,361 --> 00:29:34,563
Brutal.
594
00:29:34,629 --> 00:29:36,331
Has this ever happened
to you before?
595
00:29:36,396 --> 00:29:39,131
Well, there was this one time
I banged this chick...
596
00:29:39,133 --> 00:29:41,132
You know, an old chick,
I may add.
597
00:29:41,134 --> 00:29:43,438
Not hip-replacement old,
but old old.
598
00:29:43,505 --> 00:29:46,141
I called her Old Sexy.
599
00:29:46,207 --> 00:29:47,776
Anyways, we'd been hauling
on the bong,
600
00:29:47,842 --> 00:29:49,411
then hauling on
each other's junk
601
00:29:49,477 --> 00:29:51,179
and taking breaks
to eat tapioca pudding
602
00:29:51,246 --> 00:29:53,849
for, like, three
days straight.
603
00:29:53,914 --> 00:29:55,649
Finally, I gak for the
23rd time
604
00:29:55,717 --> 00:29:58,320
and my dong is raw.
Like, real raw.
605
00:29:58,385 --> 00:30:00,521
And she wants to go again
because, you know,
606
00:30:00,587 --> 00:30:02,590
old chicks know
their time is up soon,
607
00:30:02,657 --> 00:30:05,494
and I'm, like, "I don't know."
But then I look down?
608
00:30:05,559 --> 00:30:06,861
Bam! Another boner.
609
00:30:06,928 --> 00:30:09,296
But I was worried
for at least eight seconds.
610
00:30:09,363 --> 00:30:12,497
Well, the timing
totally sucks.
611
00:30:12,499 --> 00:30:15,269
I finally have a girlfriend
who expects me to,
612
00:30:15,335 --> 00:30:16,872
you know, do awesome
things to her.
613
00:30:16,938 --> 00:30:18,873
Well, you got to keep
your woman happy.
614
00:30:18,940 --> 00:30:21,308
That's what I'm saying.
So, what could it be?
615
00:30:21,375 --> 00:30:22,543
Maybe you injured it.
616
00:30:22,610 --> 00:30:24,779
Have you recently switched to
a new jerking-off technique?
617
00:30:24,845 --> 00:30:26,847
There's other ways
to jerk off?
618
00:30:26,914 --> 00:30:27,949
Well, that's
another conversation.
619
00:30:28,016 --> 00:30:30,384
All right, look. Let's check out
the old handbook.
620
00:30:30,450 --> 00:30:34,355
Any changes in your life?
Diet, exercise?
621
00:30:36,391 --> 00:30:38,226
Are you smoking
enough dope?
622
00:30:38,293 --> 00:30:40,295
Any weird dreams?
623
00:30:40,361 --> 00:30:42,197
Oh, I'm sorry.
624
00:30:42,263 --> 00:30:43,565
Am I interrupting
anything important?
625
00:30:43,631 --> 00:30:45,400
What do you want, Atticus?
626
00:30:45,466 --> 00:30:49,471
I'm here to clean my office.
I mean, your office.
627
00:30:49,536 --> 00:30:52,705
I don't want to talk about
my dick in front of this dick.
628
00:30:52,707 --> 00:30:54,642
Believe me, Todd,
my days of fixating
629
00:30:54,709 --> 00:30:56,210
on your penis
are long gone.
630
00:30:56,276 --> 00:30:58,212
And hardly a memory.
631
00:30:59,881 --> 00:31:01,850
Well, I did have a dream
632
00:31:01,915 --> 00:31:04,518
where I'm being chased by
some kind of shadow demon.
633
00:31:04,585 --> 00:31:06,988
All right.
Being chased, being chased.
634
00:31:07,055 --> 00:31:09,257
Okay, here's something.
635
00:31:09,324 --> 00:31:12,390
"Your dream may represent
some form of inferiority."
636
00:31:14,062 --> 00:31:17,699
I could have told him that
without the use of a handbook.
637
00:31:20,433 --> 00:31:21,936
That doesn't make sense, Jimmy.
638
00:31:22,003 --> 00:31:23,939
I mean, who could I
feel inferior to?
639
00:31:24,005 --> 00:31:25,507
The new Pure
Evil One?
640
00:31:25,573 --> 00:31:27,542
There's a new
Pure Evil One?
641
00:31:29,744 --> 00:31:30,909
Maybe.
642
00:31:30,911 --> 00:31:32,279
Those metal dudes told me
643
00:31:32,346 --> 00:31:34,548
that there's a new Pure
Evil One in town.
644
00:31:34,615 --> 00:31:36,350
That's it, man, your
wang doesn't work
645
00:31:36,417 --> 00:31:38,687
because there's this other
dude walking around school
646
00:31:38,753 --> 00:31:40,455
with an even
bigger knob.
647
00:31:40,520 --> 00:31:43,357
Don't let his cock
make you hate your schlong.
648
00:31:43,423 --> 00:31:46,393
Love your penis
and you can beat this guy.
649
00:31:46,460 --> 00:31:47,895
Come on.
650
00:31:47,961 --> 00:31:50,929
You can
love your penis.
651
00:31:50,931 --> 00:31:53,735
Like I love
your penis.
652
00:31:57,338 --> 00:32:01,909
Come on, dude.
Don't fail me now.
653
00:32:01,976 --> 00:32:05,276
Just think of Jenny.
654
00:32:05,278 --> 00:32:09,448
Hot Jenny.
Oh, sexy Jenny.
655
00:32:09,450 --> 00:32:11,952
Jenny with a
J-J?
656
00:32:12,019 --> 00:32:13,387
J.
657
00:32:13,453 --> 00:32:15,621
Maybe it would help
if I smoked a J.
658
00:32:19,494 --> 00:32:21,896
Okay, this still
isn't helping.
659
00:32:21,962 --> 00:32:25,465
Ugh. Concentrate, dude.
660
00:32:25,467 --> 00:32:28,603
Jenny, Jenny...
661
00:32:28,670 --> 00:32:33,507
You are so hot
when you're evil.
662
00:32:33,574 --> 00:32:38,313
Especially pure evil.
663
00:32:38,379 --> 00:32:42,950
Oh, Jenny, I so want
to get it up for you.
664
00:32:43,017 --> 00:32:44,318
Ah!
665
00:32:44,384 --> 00:32:48,489
I did it!
It's hard.
666
00:32:48,555 --> 00:32:52,626
You
know you want me.
667
00:32:55,763 --> 00:32:57,331
No!
668
00:32:57,498 --> 00:33:00,101
Can't deny it forever,
little dude.
669
00:33:00,168 --> 00:33:02,871
Time to face
your true destiny.
670
00:33:02,937 --> 00:33:04,839
Limp-dicked loser.
671
00:33:11,912 --> 00:33:15,883
So, how's your
relationship going?
672
00:33:15,950 --> 00:33:17,117
It's awesome.
673
00:33:17,184 --> 00:33:18,516
Yours?
674
00:33:18,518 --> 00:33:21,890
Totally awesome.
So much sex.
675
00:33:21,956 --> 00:33:25,690
Yeah, tell me about it.
Between Jenny's smoking body
676
00:33:25,692 --> 00:33:27,561
and my perfectly
functioning erection,
677
00:33:27,628 --> 00:33:28,997
we're sex maniacs.
678
00:33:29,063 --> 00:33:31,030
And even then, there's
not enough time,
679
00:33:31,032 --> 00:33:33,535
because you're having
sex all the time.
680
00:33:33,601 --> 00:33:36,004
And you wish there was
more time to have sex,
681
00:33:36,069 --> 00:33:38,036
but there's not enough time
to have sex,
682
00:33:38,038 --> 00:33:39,641
because you're trying
to have sex,
683
00:33:39,707 --> 00:33:41,409
but your parts
are all sore.
684
00:33:41,476 --> 00:33:44,376
Oh, I can't keep up
the charade any longer.
685
00:33:44,378 --> 00:33:45,547
I'm not getting any.
686
00:33:45,613 --> 00:33:47,815
Hannah is all weird
and distant.
687
00:33:47,882 --> 00:33:49,883
I'm not getting any,
either.
688
00:33:49,950 --> 00:33:51,085
Jenny is
all over me,
689
00:33:51,151 --> 00:33:52,519
but my wang
won't wong.
690
00:33:52,586 --> 00:33:54,555
Little dude?
691
00:33:54,622 --> 00:33:56,721
Interested in
purchasing some porn?
692
00:33:56,723 --> 00:33:58,759
No, wait.
693
00:33:58,825 --> 00:34:01,729
That would be like throwing
money down the drain.
694
00:34:01,796 --> 00:34:03,097
Ha-ha, I get it.
695
00:34:03,163 --> 00:34:05,165
Because I can't get
an erection anymore, right?
696
00:34:05,232 --> 00:34:06,367
Whoa.
697
00:34:06,433 --> 00:34:09,002
Your dick may be extinguished,
but your brain is on fire.
698
00:34:09,069 --> 00:34:10,037
Loser.
699
00:34:12,607 --> 00:34:13,739
All right, assholes.
700
00:34:13,741 --> 00:34:16,511
I'm only going to
say this once.
701
00:34:16,576 --> 00:34:19,911
Stay out of my dreams.
702
00:34:19,913 --> 00:34:21,915
Yeah, that's my turf.
703
00:34:25,520 --> 00:34:28,587
Dozens of Hannah
clones were created,
704
00:34:28,589 --> 00:34:33,094
each more evil than the last,
but none proved successful.
705
00:34:33,160 --> 00:34:36,929
Test Subject B was released
into the community
706
00:34:36,931 --> 00:34:39,801
to see if she would become
the true Pure Evil One.
707
00:34:41,535 --> 00:34:43,768
You kids really need
to do something about this.
708
00:34:43,770 --> 00:34:46,207
Not that I'm telling you
how to do your job,
709
00:34:46,274 --> 00:34:49,042
unless you want me to give you
guidance or counselling, or...
710
00:34:49,109 --> 00:34:49,877
Just go, Atticus.
711
00:34:49,944 --> 00:34:52,111
You didn't let me finish.
712
00:34:52,113 --> 00:34:53,147
Guidance counselling.
713
00:34:53,214 --> 00:34:55,917
You're not a guidance counsellor
anymore, Atticus.
714
00:34:55,982 --> 00:34:58,085
You're just a janitor.
715
00:34:58,152 --> 00:35:01,156
You've got a real mean streak
in you, Jenny Kolinsky.
716
00:35:03,723 --> 00:35:07,495
Nobody understands
me, nobody!
717
00:35:07,562 --> 00:35:08,997
Atticus is right.
718
00:35:09,062 --> 00:35:10,464
We're not on our game.
719
00:35:10,531 --> 00:35:11,900
We need to forget
everything else
720
00:35:11,966 --> 00:35:13,468
and focus on finding
the book.
721
00:35:13,533 --> 00:35:15,469
The book is just gonna
keep coming back
722
00:35:15,535 --> 00:35:17,471
no matter how many times
we find it.
723
00:35:17,538 --> 00:35:20,909
What we gotta do is figure out
who this new Pure Evil One is
724
00:35:20,975 --> 00:35:22,641
and obliterate his ass.
725
00:35:22,643 --> 00:35:23,678
Obliterate?
726
00:35:23,743 --> 00:35:25,245
Awesome word.
727
00:35:25,312 --> 00:35:26,980
Yeah, really awesome.
728
00:35:27,047 --> 00:35:29,149
You okay, Hannah?
729
00:35:29,216 --> 00:35:30,751
You don't look well.
730
00:35:30,817 --> 00:35:34,855
Um, it's my,
uh, stomach.
731
00:35:34,922 --> 00:35:37,926
Must have been that tuna fish
sandwich I had this morning.
732
00:35:37,991 --> 00:35:39,593
Sorry to hear
that, sweetie.
733
00:35:39,660 --> 00:35:41,659
And you don't need
to say "tuna fish,"
734
00:35:41,661 --> 00:35:43,661
because there's
no other type of tuna.
735
00:35:43,663 --> 00:35:44,832
Here.
736
00:35:44,899 --> 00:35:46,835
Have some of
my turkey bird sandwich.
737
00:35:46,901 --> 00:35:49,837
Um, I got to go.
It's my stomach.
738
00:35:49,904 --> 00:35:52,640
Just wait here
and I'll be right back.
739
00:35:53,174 --> 00:35:54,609
Poor kid.
740
00:35:54,674 --> 00:35:56,710
She's been through
so much.
741
00:35:56,777 --> 00:36:00,511
First she died;
now she's got the shits.
742
00:36:00,513 --> 00:36:02,683
Mm-mmm.
743
00:36:04,051 --> 00:36:07,018
What if I am the new
Pure Evil One?
744
00:36:07,020 --> 00:36:10,290
Have I always
been pure evil?
745
00:36:10,357 --> 00:36:13,961
Am I even me?
746
00:36:14,027 --> 00:36:15,861
Help me.
747
00:36:15,863 --> 00:36:18,031
Oh, poop.
748
00:36:23,571 --> 00:36:25,873
I am sorry.
749
00:36:33,881 --> 00:36:36,049
No, no!
750
00:36:44,926 --> 00:36:48,830
We can't wait for Hannah.
Let's go fight evil.
751
00:36:48,895 --> 00:36:50,163
This shouldn't be
too tough.
752
00:36:50,230 --> 00:36:53,565
Anyone got a giant tube
of zit cream?
753
00:36:53,567 --> 00:36:54,736
What do we do, Todd?
754
00:36:54,801 --> 00:36:56,738
I have no
fucking idea.
755
00:37:01,576 --> 00:37:05,280
That puss-faced kid must be
the new Pure Evil One.
756
00:37:05,346 --> 00:37:09,851
He's melting off people's faces
just like in my nightmare.
757
00:37:09,917 --> 00:37:12,687
I don't know, Todd.
That's Gavin McClintoch.
758
00:37:12,752 --> 00:37:14,855
Hardly Pure Evil One
material.
759
00:37:14,922 --> 00:37:16,925
He doesn't look like
he's enjoying himself.
760
00:37:22,763 --> 00:37:24,565
Help me!
761
00:37:29,002 --> 00:37:31,705
Todd, the lockers!
762
00:37:31,772 --> 00:37:33,708
The lockers
aren't melting.
763
00:37:33,774 --> 00:37:35,777
Curtis, pull off
the locker doors.
764
00:37:35,843 --> 00:37:38,078
One for each of us.
765
00:37:46,152 --> 00:37:49,156
Come on, guys.
Use the lockers as a shield.
766
00:37:59,200 --> 00:38:01,169
Box him in.
767
00:38:02,835 --> 00:38:04,636
Ow, ow,
ow! Ow, it burns.
768
00:38:04,638 --> 00:38:05,806
Ow, that's
hurting! Ow.
769
00:38:05,872 --> 00:38:09,676
Ow, ow, ow!
770
00:38:17,683 --> 00:38:20,819
Yeah! Suck it,
new Pure Evil One.
771
00:38:20,821 --> 00:38:23,958
There can only be one
Pure Evil One, and that's me.
772
00:38:24,024 --> 00:38:25,792
Except I'm not
really pure evil,
773
00:38:25,859 --> 00:38:27,428
even if that is my
supposed destiny.
774
00:38:27,495 --> 00:38:30,864
Because I'm my own
dude who's not evil.
775
00:38:30,931 --> 00:38:33,968
Do you really think this guy
was the new Pure Evil One?
776
00:38:34,035 --> 00:38:34,935
She's right, Todd.
777
00:38:35,002 --> 00:38:37,939
That was pretty easy.
778
00:38:38,004 --> 00:38:39,172
Tell me what
you know.
779
00:38:39,239 --> 00:38:41,975
Who's the new
Pure Evil One?
780
00:38:50,884 --> 00:38:54,956
Hmm, how strange.
781
00:38:55,022 --> 00:38:57,190
I've somehow retained
all the memories
782
00:38:57,257 --> 00:39:00,027
of my previous self.
783
00:39:00,093 --> 00:39:03,363
And yet, something
is different.
784
00:39:04,497 --> 00:39:07,868
I feel more evil.
785
00:39:20,381 --> 00:39:23,084
♪ It wasn't long ago
I held prestige ♪
786
00:39:23,149 --> 00:39:25,884
♪ Now I'm treated like
I have a disease ♪
787
00:39:25,886 --> 00:39:30,190
♪ Throbbing pain
in my balls ♪
788
00:39:30,256 --> 00:39:33,326
♪ I hope it's not
an inguinal hernia ♪
789
00:39:33,393 --> 00:39:35,363
♪ I'm a sh-sh-shadow
in the dark ♪
790
00:39:38,064 --> 00:39:40,400
♪ These little goblins
got me whipped ♪
791
00:39:40,468 --> 00:39:43,071
♪ Their crazy problems
I can't fix ♪
792
00:39:43,136 --> 00:39:46,173
♪ Oh, how I miss
stroking my mop ♪
793
00:39:46,239 --> 00:39:48,406
♪ And by "mop"
I don't mean "cock" ♪
794
00:39:48,408 --> 00:39:52,279
♪ I'm a sh-sh-shadow
in the dark ♪
795
00:39:53,480 --> 00:39:56,517
♪ Once was a time
you wanted me ♪
796
00:39:56,584 --> 00:39:58,386
♪ Your heavy-metal fantasy
797
00:39:58,451 --> 00:40:01,022
♪ Now I slide my hand
into your pants ♪
798
00:40:01,087 --> 00:40:03,857
♪ It doesn't move
it doesn't dance ♪
799
00:40:03,924 --> 00:40:06,794
♪ You're a sh-sh-shadow
in the dark ♪
800
00:40:09,797 --> 00:40:12,433
♪ Now I'm not the dude
I used to be ♪
801
00:40:12,500 --> 00:40:15,266
♪ But I love you
unconditionally ♪
802
00:40:15,268 --> 00:40:19,107
♪ Bigger evil
has complications ♪
803
00:40:19,172 --> 00:40:22,940
♪ You might want to try
female masturbation ♪
804
00:40:22,942 --> 00:40:25,011
♪ I'm a sh-sh-shadow
in the dark ♪
805
00:40:27,114 --> 00:40:30,051
♪ Something about you
ain't the same ♪
806
00:40:30,116 --> 00:40:32,953
♪ Since you died
and came back again ♪
807
00:40:33,020 --> 00:40:35,823
♪ I gaze at you
a thousand-mile stare ♪
808
00:40:35,890 --> 00:40:39,993
♪ My penis is a torpedo
in the air ♪
809
00:40:40,060 --> 00:40:43,096
♪ You're a sh-sh-shumpthing
in the dark ♪
810
00:40:44,797 --> 00:40:47,435
♪ No time to ponder
your wiener ♪
811
00:40:47,500 --> 00:40:50,571
♪ So confused
I'm lost and beleaguered ♪
812
00:40:50,638 --> 00:40:53,306
♪ Strange thoughts
inside my mind ♪
813
00:40:53,373 --> 00:40:56,009
♪ Whispering
"Stop being kind" ♪
814
00:40:56,076 --> 00:40:58,146
♪ I'm a sh-sh-shadow
in the dark ♪
815
00:41:00,314 --> 00:41:05,185
♪ Oh, where, oh, where
do those emotions go ♪
816
00:41:05,252 --> 00:41:08,922
♪ Are they tossed out into
817
00:41:08,989 --> 00:41:10,591
♪ The cold, cold snow
818
00:41:10,658 --> 00:41:13,960
♪ Or do they simply
819
00:41:14,027 --> 00:41:16,363
♪ Just lie awake
820
00:41:16,430 --> 00:41:19,167
♪ Like a certain book
821
00:41:19,232 --> 00:41:22,102
♪ That we all hate
822
00:41:22,169 --> 00:41:26,140
♪ The more you learn
823
00:41:27,875 --> 00:41:30,011
♪ The less you know
824
00:41:32,980 --> 00:41:34,348
We're no closer
to figuring out
825
00:41:34,415 --> 00:41:36,284
who the new
Pure Evil One is.
826
00:41:36,350 --> 00:41:39,286
I guess we just wait for
the book to show up again.
827
00:41:39,352 --> 00:41:40,488
Wow.
828
00:41:40,553 --> 00:41:42,989
The new Pure Evil One
could be anyone.
829
00:41:43,056 --> 00:41:45,026
Like that guy.
830
00:41:47,328 --> 00:41:49,197
Or that guy.
831
00:41:53,200 --> 00:41:54,368
Or her.
832
00:41:58,439 --> 00:42:00,038
Hey! He's mine, bitch.
833
00:42:00,040 --> 00:42:01,542
Get your own
Pure Evil One.
834
00:42:01,609 --> 00:42:04,245
Whoa.
Jenny, uh...
835
00:42:04,310 --> 00:42:07,314
I don't know what
came over me.
836
00:42:07,381 --> 00:42:09,382
Hannah?
837
00:42:13,453 --> 00:42:14,921
Psst.
838
00:42:18,058 --> 00:42:19,126
Hannah?
839
00:42:22,263 --> 00:42:26,000
There's something different
about you, little dudette.
840
00:42:26,065 --> 00:42:28,035
I...
841
00:42:28,102 --> 00:42:30,270
...don't know what you're
talking about.
842
00:42:32,605 --> 00:42:33,908
You smell different.
843
00:42:33,973 --> 00:42:36,509
And you're not a
loser anymore.
844
00:42:36,576 --> 00:42:38,546
Loser.
845
00:42:38,611 --> 00:42:40,413
You don't know
the third of it.
846
00:42:44,317 --> 00:42:46,687
You seem like
the kind of girl who's...
847
00:42:48,254 --> 00:42:50,422
Searching for something.
848
00:42:50,424 --> 00:42:52,460
Maybe.
849
00:42:52,526 --> 00:42:56,564
Well, to get it,
you're going to need our help.
850
00:42:56,629 --> 00:42:58,265
Ugh.
851
00:42:58,332 --> 00:43:00,567
What am I supposed to do
with this?
852
00:43:07,107 --> 00:43:08,375
Mm-hmm.
853
00:43:24,290 --> 00:43:26,126
Todd, I've been looking
for you everywhere.
854
00:43:26,192 --> 00:43:28,228
I even tried
a classroom.
855
00:43:28,294 --> 00:43:29,462
I can't go out there.
856
00:43:29,529 --> 00:43:31,598
Anyone could be
the new Pure Evil One.
857
00:43:31,665 --> 00:43:32,565
Stop it.
858
00:43:32,632 --> 00:43:34,567
You're clearly losing your shit
to paranoia.
859
00:43:34,634 --> 00:43:36,970
I'm not being paranoid
if I'm right.
860
00:43:37,036 --> 00:43:38,239
Right about what?
861
00:43:38,305 --> 00:43:40,341
Right about everything.
862
00:43:40,406 --> 00:43:43,109
Oh, for fuck's sake, Todd,
get it together!
863
00:43:43,176 --> 00:43:45,412
Be a man and stand up
for yourself.
864
00:43:45,478 --> 00:43:48,482
Do that and maybe you'll
actually get a boner again.
865
00:43:48,549 --> 00:43:51,752
Maybe you're the one
who stole my boner.
866
00:43:51,819 --> 00:43:53,152
It's too much pressure.
867
00:43:53,154 --> 00:43:55,652
"Don't destroy
the world, Todd."
868
00:43:55,654 --> 00:43:57,024
"Let's fight the
book, Todd."
869
00:43:57,091 --> 00:43:59,694
"Why don't you have
a boner, Todd?"
870
00:43:59,759 --> 00:44:01,161
What are you
getting at?
871
00:44:01,227 --> 00:44:03,661
Maybe you're the new
Pure Evil One.
872
00:44:03,663 --> 00:44:07,167
First you steal my boner,
then you destroy the world!
873
00:44:07,234 --> 00:44:09,203
I am so done
with this.
874
00:44:10,636 --> 00:44:12,439
I've been keeping this
875
00:44:12,506 --> 00:44:14,642
for when you stop
feeling sorry for yourself
876
00:44:14,707 --> 00:44:16,674
and decide to be
a hero again.
877
00:44:16,676 --> 00:44:19,613
But that doesn't look like
it's going to happen.
878
00:44:19,680 --> 00:44:22,716
Jenny, I'm sorry.
I didn't mean it.
879
00:44:23,884 --> 00:44:29,123
You just don't understand
what I'm going through.
880
00:44:29,189 --> 00:44:29,957
Hannah?
881
00:44:30,024 --> 00:44:31,558
How long have you been
under there?
882
00:44:31,625 --> 00:44:32,727
A while.
883
00:44:32,792 --> 00:44:35,161
I like to hide under desks
when I'm sad.
884
00:44:35,228 --> 00:44:35,796
You're sad, too?
885
00:44:35,863 --> 00:44:37,498
I did die, apparently.
886
00:44:37,564 --> 00:44:39,567
Oh, yeah, right.
887
00:44:39,632 --> 00:44:41,067
That sucks.
888
00:44:41,134 --> 00:44:43,201
It really does.
889
00:44:43,203 --> 00:44:47,241
So, you heard everything
between me and Jenny?
890
00:44:47,306 --> 00:44:49,310
Yeah, kind of hard
to ignore.
891
00:44:49,375 --> 00:44:51,178
So, you know
about my...
892
00:44:51,245 --> 00:44:53,547
Boner, or lack thereof?
893
00:44:53,614 --> 00:44:55,216
Poor boner.
894
00:44:56,450 --> 00:44:59,219
You know, Todd,
ever since I died,
895
00:44:59,285 --> 00:45:01,821
no one really understands
what I'm going through.
896
00:45:01,888 --> 00:45:05,225
Curtis tries,
but it didn't happen to him
897
00:45:05,292 --> 00:45:07,560
so there's no way for him
to get it.
898
00:45:07,627 --> 00:45:12,232
I feel like
I'm all alone.
899
00:45:12,299 --> 00:45:13,501
Lost.
900
00:45:13,567 --> 00:45:15,102
Do you know what
I mean?
901
00:45:15,169 --> 00:45:17,504
Yeah, I actually do.
902
00:45:17,571 --> 00:45:20,574
And sometimes,
I just wish
903
00:45:20,640 --> 00:45:24,743
I had someone to be with who
feels the same way that I do,
904
00:45:24,745 --> 00:45:27,281
even if it's about
something else.
905
00:45:27,346 --> 00:45:31,752
I just want someone
to lean on.
906
00:45:33,252 --> 00:45:35,789
Hannah, what are you
doing? I'm with Jenny.
907
00:45:35,855 --> 00:45:38,225
Can she give you
what you want?
908
00:45:38,292 --> 00:45:40,127
Ahh.
909
00:45:40,194 --> 00:45:42,363
Mmm.
910
00:45:42,428 --> 00:45:44,597
There you go.
911
00:45:47,634 --> 00:45:48,769
Hey, Jenny.
912
00:45:48,835 --> 00:45:50,236
Are you okay?
913
00:45:50,303 --> 00:45:51,872
Todd is being weird.
914
00:45:51,939 --> 00:45:54,241
So is Hannah.
915
00:45:54,308 --> 00:45:57,078
Boy, relationships
are tough, huh?
916
00:45:59,245 --> 00:46:00,647
We have a lot
in common.
917
00:46:00,714 --> 00:46:02,114
No, we don't.
918
00:46:02,116 --> 00:46:03,884
For you see, Jenny,
919
00:46:03,951 --> 00:46:06,618
you and I are like a pair of
unhappy housewives
920
00:46:06,620 --> 00:46:09,290
waiting patiently for
our crazy-ass husbands
921
00:46:09,355 --> 00:46:11,788
to get their shit together
and come home to us,
922
00:46:11,790 --> 00:46:14,495
their arms filled with roses
and chocolates and corn chips
923
00:46:14,560 --> 00:46:16,296
and...
924
00:46:16,363 --> 00:46:17,832
You know what?
925
00:46:17,897 --> 00:46:20,468
I'm tired of always having to
worry about Todd's feelings.
926
00:46:20,533 --> 00:46:22,335
I have feelings
too, you know.
927
00:46:22,402 --> 00:46:24,469
Well, maybe you're being
too hard on him.
928
00:46:24,471 --> 00:46:26,640
I mean, he is the
Pure Evil One,
929
00:46:26,707 --> 00:46:28,843
and there's another
Pure Evil One who's out there
930
00:46:28,908 --> 00:46:30,410
looking to obliterate
his ass.
931
00:46:30,477 --> 00:46:32,476
That's got to be
hard to deal with.
932
00:46:32,478 --> 00:46:35,315
Yeah, I guess so.
933
00:46:35,381 --> 00:46:38,318
And maybe you're being
too hard on Hannah.
934
00:46:38,384 --> 00:46:39,752
I mean, she
did die
935
00:46:39,819 --> 00:46:41,855
and has no memory
of how she un-died,
936
00:46:41,922 --> 00:46:44,291
and that's gotta be hard
to deal with, too.
937
00:46:44,357 --> 00:46:45,859
You know what?
You're right, Jenny.
938
00:46:45,926 --> 00:46:47,862
We should be there
for our loved ones,
939
00:46:47,928 --> 00:46:50,297
no matter what kind of
crazy assholes or bitches
940
00:46:50,364 --> 00:46:51,499
they may be.
941
00:46:51,564 --> 00:46:53,867
Yeah, let's
go tell them.
942
00:46:53,933 --> 00:46:54,935
Let's go tell them...
943
00:46:55,002 --> 00:46:56,504
How much we care
about them?
944
00:46:56,569 --> 00:46:57,738
Yeah.
945
00:47:02,408 --> 00:47:05,945
What the fuck?
946
00:47:06,013 --> 00:47:07,348
Argh.
947
00:47:07,413 --> 00:47:10,383
Jenny!
948
00:47:17,690 --> 00:47:19,326
Jenny, wait!
949
00:47:19,393 --> 00:47:21,829
Uh, huge boner.
Ow, ow, ow.
950
00:47:29,035 --> 00:47:31,504
Okay, Curtis.
You can do this.
951
00:47:31,571 --> 00:47:34,474
Hannah, I understand things
have been weird for you
952
00:47:34,540 --> 00:47:37,875
ever since you died, and things
haven't been perfect between us.
953
00:47:37,877 --> 00:47:40,879
As much as it hurts me
that you made out with Todd,
954
00:47:40,881 --> 00:47:43,683
it's not like it isn't something
I haven't dreamed about doing.
955
00:47:43,750 --> 00:47:45,319
Again.
956
00:47:45,384 --> 00:47:47,520
Let's just put this
whole sordid mess behind us
957
00:47:47,587 --> 00:47:50,457
and start over, hmm?
958
00:47:52,257 --> 00:47:54,495
Fuck that.
959
00:47:54,560 --> 00:47:55,726
What?
960
00:47:55,728 --> 00:47:57,728
It's time I get myself
a real man.
961
00:47:57,730 --> 00:48:01,535
A man who can
destroy the world.
962
00:48:01,602 --> 00:48:02,937
But you can't
mean that.
963
00:48:03,002 --> 00:48:04,738
Hannah!
964
00:48:09,776 --> 00:48:10,810
Darn it.
965
00:48:12,712 --> 00:48:15,548
Hannah, you forget your...
966
00:48:15,616 --> 00:48:17,651
Science kit.
967
00:48:31,832 --> 00:48:34,701
Now, if they slip
and I pick them up,
968
00:48:34,768 --> 00:48:36,904
they'll have to let me
back in the gang.
969
00:48:36,969 --> 00:48:38,538
An ingenious plan.
970
00:48:38,605 --> 00:48:40,307
Jenny, it wasn't
what it looked like.
971
00:48:40,373 --> 00:48:41,442
Oh, really?
972
00:48:41,507 --> 00:48:43,944
Oh, good, 'cause I thought I saw
a boner in your pants
973
00:48:44,011 --> 00:48:45,579
and Hannah's tongue
in your mouth.
974
00:48:45,645 --> 00:48:47,580
Uh, okay, it was what
it looked like,
975
00:48:47,647 --> 00:48:49,781
but I've been under
a lot of stress lately
976
00:48:49,783 --> 00:48:51,783
and I've got a bad case
of paranoia
977
00:48:51,785 --> 00:48:53,953
and I have no control over
my own dick.
978
00:48:54,020 --> 00:48:56,422
I know that's hard for you
to understand that,
979
00:48:56,489 --> 00:48:58,459
because you're a chick
without a dick.
980
00:48:59,493 --> 00:49:02,395
Worst excuse ever, Todd.
981
00:49:02,462 --> 00:49:03,797
Maybe you're lying
to yourself.
982
00:49:03,864 --> 00:49:06,000
Maybe you never had
feelings for me.
983
00:49:06,065 --> 00:49:08,002
Maybe you were just interested
in the chase,
984
00:49:08,067 --> 00:49:11,671
and now that you've got me,
you want to throw me away
985
00:49:11,738 --> 00:49:13,674
like a piece
of trash!
986
00:49:13,739 --> 00:49:17,544
Well, I am not trash, mister.
I am not trash!
987
00:49:19,011 --> 00:49:21,080
No, no, that's
totally not it.
988
00:49:21,147 --> 00:49:25,618
If you were able to give me
a boner, I would obliterate you.
989
00:49:25,685 --> 00:49:26,853
Sexually, that is.
990
00:49:28,555 --> 00:49:32,489
Not only did you betray me;
you betrayed your best friend.
991
00:49:32,491 --> 00:49:35,428
You really are
pure evil, Todd.
992
00:49:35,495 --> 00:49:39,333
A pure evil asshole.
993
00:49:39,399 --> 00:49:40,534
Yeah?
994
00:49:40,600 --> 00:49:43,103
Well, you try being
the Pure Evil One.
995
00:49:43,169 --> 00:49:45,805
It's not as easy
as it looks.
996
00:49:45,872 --> 00:49:47,507
Stupid dong!
997
00:49:47,573 --> 00:49:49,375
Always getting me
in trouble.
998
00:49:49,442 --> 00:49:51,411
Ow!
999
00:49:53,078 --> 00:49:54,781
Dude, I am so sorry.
1000
00:49:54,848 --> 00:49:56,047
Forget it, Todd.
1001
00:49:56,049 --> 00:49:58,819
First you kill my girlfriend,
then you make out with her.
1002
00:49:58,884 --> 00:50:00,821
You're lucky I'm a lover,
not a fighter,
1003
00:50:00,886 --> 00:50:03,656
because if I were a fighter,
I would fight you, dude.
1004
00:50:03,723 --> 00:50:05,857
I don't know if I would win
the fight
1005
00:50:05,859 --> 00:50:07,895
'cause I'm not really
much of a fighter.
1006
00:50:07,960 --> 00:50:09,897
I'm more of a biter
than a puncher.
1007
00:50:09,962 --> 00:50:12,131
Plus I'm not really in
the best of shape.
1008
00:50:12,198 --> 00:50:14,866
Plus I am slightly overweight
from all the corn chips
1009
00:50:14,868 --> 00:50:18,639
and turkey bird sandwiches,
but a man has to eat, Todd.
1010
00:50:18,705 --> 00:50:20,574
Curtis, you're losing
your train of thought.
1011
00:50:20,640 --> 00:50:22,475
Stop interrupting!
1012
00:50:22,542 --> 00:50:25,045
You're like an
evil locomotive
1013
00:50:25,111 --> 00:50:28,712
chugging down the tracks
of my life, Todd.
1014
00:50:28,714 --> 00:50:31,718
Now you've gone and made me
forget what I was gonna say.
1015
00:50:31,785 --> 00:50:34,087
Being the Pure Evil One
has turned you into...
1016
00:50:34,154 --> 00:50:35,723
I know, I know.
An asshole.
1017
00:50:35,788 --> 00:50:39,158
No, a real asshole.
1018
00:50:39,225 --> 00:50:43,663
That's right,
I went there.
1019
00:50:43,730 --> 00:50:45,699
Todd?
1020
00:50:47,067 --> 00:50:48,769
I think you're
peachy keen.
1021
00:50:48,835 --> 00:50:51,538
Wow. A compliment from
an even bigger asshole.
1022
00:50:51,605 --> 00:50:53,574
Thanks, but no thanks.
1023
00:50:56,743 --> 00:51:01,411
To be good...
or not to be good?
1024
00:51:01,413 --> 00:51:03,015
That is the question.
1025
00:51:03,082 --> 00:51:06,519
To be bad or to
be not bad?
1026
00:51:06,585 --> 00:51:08,888
That's another question.
1027
00:51:08,955 --> 00:51:11,625
Actually, they're both the same
question, but nevertheless,
1028
00:51:11,690 --> 00:51:14,127
they're still valid questions
which must be asked,
1029
00:51:14,194 --> 00:51:16,997
which is why I'm
asking them.
1030
00:51:18,497 --> 00:51:21,601
But what is the answer?
1031
00:51:21,667 --> 00:51:23,903
Ah, that cruel and callous
answer.
1032
00:51:23,969 --> 00:51:26,105
How you elude me!
1033
00:51:26,172 --> 00:51:27,741
I've been bad my
whole life,
1034
00:51:27,808 --> 00:51:29,774
even when I was
pretending to be good.
1035
00:51:29,776 --> 00:51:33,547
'Tis not a natural
fit for thee,
1036
00:51:33,613 --> 00:51:36,450
but to be truly, purely,
non-pretendingly good,
1037
00:51:36,515 --> 00:51:38,117
where does it
get me?
1038
00:51:38,185 --> 00:51:42,055
On my knees, scrubbing
stinky toilets!
1039
00:51:42,122 --> 00:51:44,825
Ah! There's the rub.
1040
00:51:47,027 --> 00:51:48,794
Well, screw you, rub!
I'm going...
1041
00:51:48,796 --> 00:51:49,730
No, I cannot.
1042
00:51:49,796 --> 00:51:52,064
I must not return to
my old wicked ways.
1043
00:51:52,131 --> 00:51:53,900
Sure, it was fun
for a while.
1044
00:51:53,966 --> 00:51:57,904
But all fun must end,
and end it did for thee.
1045
00:51:57,971 --> 00:52:01,642
Alone, unloved, demoted.
1046
00:52:01,707 --> 00:52:05,678
No friends, no gang,
no rhyme or reason.
1047
00:52:07,547 --> 00:52:10,184
But to embrace goodness
is to embrace love,
1048
00:52:10,250 --> 00:52:13,150
and I do love those kids.
1049
00:52:13,152 --> 00:52:14,986
How I love them so!
1050
00:52:14,988 --> 00:52:19,158
But now, their tight little
nucleus has been ripped asunder
1051
00:52:19,225 --> 00:52:21,794
by the gods of
chaos, dissension
1052
00:52:21,861 --> 00:52:23,828
and uncontrollable
teenage hormones!
1053
00:52:23,830 --> 00:52:25,830
Ah!
1054
00:52:25,832 --> 00:52:27,935
Another rub,
1055
00:52:28,000 --> 00:52:30,770
but this rub is
a kind rub.
1056
00:52:30,837 --> 00:52:33,774
Forsooth, I know
thy mission!
1057
00:52:33,839 --> 00:52:36,843
To rub them back
together as one,
1058
00:52:36,910 --> 00:52:41,214
so they may yet again become
a formidable gang of kids!
1059
00:52:42,881 --> 00:52:45,051
It's so fucking worth
it to be good!
1060
00:52:52,893 --> 00:52:54,661
Man, this totally sucks.
1061
00:52:54,727 --> 00:52:58,231
I lost my babe, my buddy,
and my boner.
1062
00:52:58,297 --> 00:53:02,002
What I wouldn't do
for a joint.
1063
00:53:08,875 --> 00:53:11,978
Hey, Todd.
1064
00:53:12,044 --> 00:53:13,877
Care to join me?
1065
00:53:13,879 --> 00:53:15,715
I shouldn't be around
you, Hannah.
1066
00:53:15,781 --> 00:53:18,050
You're a bad influence.
1067
00:53:18,118 --> 00:53:20,853
Thank you, you're
so sweet!
1068
00:53:20,921 --> 00:53:22,656
So, you wanna
get wasted?
1069
00:53:22,721 --> 00:53:24,591
When did you start
smoking dope?
1070
00:53:24,658 --> 00:53:27,861
There's a lot of things
you don't know about me.
1071
00:53:27,928 --> 00:53:31,198
Come on, don't be a pussy.
You know you want it.
1072
00:53:31,263 --> 00:53:33,730
It'll ease your
troubled mind.
1073
00:53:33,732 --> 00:53:37,169
My troubled mind could
definitely use some easing.
1074
00:53:43,643 --> 00:53:45,279
Ahhh...
1075
00:53:49,783 --> 00:53:51,884
Dozens of Hannah
clones were created,
1076
00:53:51,951 --> 00:53:53,585
each more evil than
the last.
1077
00:53:54,955 --> 00:53:56,754
But none proved successful.
1078
00:53:56,756 --> 00:53:59,359
Test Subject B was released
into the community
1079
00:53:59,426 --> 00:54:02,895
to see if she would become
the true Pure Evil One.
1080
00:54:02,962 --> 00:54:04,964
Holy titty-nipples!
1081
00:54:05,031 --> 00:54:07,765
I'm dating the
Pure Evil One?
1082
00:54:07,767 --> 00:54:09,100
Time is quickly
running out.
1083
00:54:09,102 --> 00:54:10,870
My husband is onto me.
1084
00:54:10,937 --> 00:54:14,942
I must come up with
a new plan.
1085
00:54:15,007 --> 00:54:17,777
Jimmy, we have
a problem.
1086
00:54:17,843 --> 00:54:21,279
There is dissension
among the gang.
1087
00:54:21,281 --> 00:54:24,084
Let's see what the old
dictionary has to say here.
1088
00:54:24,149 --> 00:54:27,118
"Dissen..."
1089
00:54:27,120 --> 00:54:30,757
Di-sen... D-I... E-N, wait.
1090
00:54:30,823 --> 00:54:33,159
D-I-S-S-E-N-S-I...
Oh, fuck it!
1091
00:54:33,225 --> 00:54:35,094
Fuck the dictionary!
1092
00:54:35,160 --> 00:54:38,629
Fuck the... fuck
the dictionary!
1093
00:54:38,631 --> 00:54:41,268
Hey, that's school property
you're destroying.
1094
00:54:43,303 --> 00:54:46,138
I have devised a plan to get
them back together,
1095
00:54:46,205 --> 00:54:50,808
and it involves kidnapping.
1096
00:54:50,810 --> 00:54:54,812
In exactly 18 minutes, you will
corner Jenny at this location,
1097
00:54:54,814 --> 00:54:56,849
then place a sack
over her head.
1098
00:54:56,915 --> 00:55:01,053
Oh, yeah! I've put my sack on
a girl's face plenty of times.
1099
00:55:02,821 --> 00:55:06,258
Simultaneously, I will corner
Curtis at this location.
1100
00:55:06,326 --> 00:55:08,762
Then, place a sack over
his head.
1101
00:55:08,828 --> 00:55:10,864
Then, we'll bring them back
to this office
1102
00:55:10,930 --> 00:55:13,332
and brainwash them into getting
the gang back together.
1103
00:55:13,399 --> 00:55:15,001
It's a fool-proof plan.
1104
00:55:15,067 --> 00:55:18,372
Probably one of my
all-time greats.
1105
00:55:18,437 --> 00:55:21,107
We could do that, but
we could also do this.
1106
00:55:22,375 --> 00:55:24,177
Will Jenny Kolinsky
and Curtis Weaver
1107
00:55:24,243 --> 00:55:27,180
please report to the guidance
counsellor's office?
1108
00:55:27,247 --> 00:55:31,118
So, I spent three hours working
on this diagram for nothing.
1109
00:55:31,183 --> 00:55:33,053
You just fucked
my diagram!
1110
00:55:36,790 --> 00:55:39,026
Oh, what kind of
weed is this?
1111
00:55:39,091 --> 00:55:41,359
It's super strong.
1112
00:55:41,361 --> 00:55:44,862
I got it from
some friends.
1113
00:55:46,098 --> 00:55:48,000
I had so much
promise, Hannah.
1114
00:55:48,067 --> 00:55:50,033
I was gonna be
a heavy metal god.
1115
00:55:50,035 --> 00:55:51,837
A real one,
1116
00:55:51,904 --> 00:55:54,205
not some demonically possessed
one that killed people,
1117
00:55:54,207 --> 00:55:57,875
until that book came along
and destroyed my life.
1118
00:55:57,877 --> 00:56:00,413
You know what
you need to do?
1119
00:56:00,480 --> 00:56:03,150
You need to get your hands
on the book again.
1120
00:56:03,216 --> 00:56:06,486
And once you have it,
you can send it away.
1121
00:56:06,553 --> 00:56:08,020
But not to Timbuktu.
1122
00:56:08,087 --> 00:56:11,825
Gee, Hannah, that sounds
like a bad idea,
1123
00:56:11,890 --> 00:56:14,994
and I'm kind of an
expert on bad ideas.
1124
00:56:15,060 --> 00:56:17,730
And besides, I'd have to
go find the book.
1125
00:56:17,797 --> 00:56:19,332
The book that
destroyed my life.
1126
00:56:19,399 --> 00:56:24,438
All you need to do is feel it
deep inside your pants.
1127
00:56:24,504 --> 00:56:27,873
I can't feel anything down
there, that's the problem!
1128
00:56:27,940 --> 00:56:31,074
Shh, relax.
1129
00:56:31,076 --> 00:56:33,379
Feel it,
1130
00:56:33,446 --> 00:56:36,913
deep inside your pants.
1131
00:56:36,915 --> 00:56:38,451
Loser.
1132
00:56:38,518 --> 00:56:40,253
Did you just call
me a loser?
1133
00:56:40,319 --> 00:56:42,455
Concentrate, Todd!
1134
00:56:42,522 --> 00:56:47,091
Feel it deep inside
your pants, Todd.
1135
00:56:47,093 --> 00:56:49,259
Deep.
1136
00:56:49,261 --> 00:56:51,428
Deep...
1137
00:56:51,430 --> 00:56:55,268
♪ An ancient prophecy
1138
00:56:55,335 --> 00:56:59,940
♪ Foretold a chosen one
1139
00:57:00,006 --> 00:57:04,544
♪ The one of pure evil
1140
00:57:04,611 --> 00:57:08,982
♪ Will bring the
world to us ♪
1141
00:57:11,283 --> 00:57:12,818
Whoa, it worked!
1142
00:57:12,886 --> 00:57:14,254
So, what do we
do now?
1143
00:57:14,319 --> 00:57:15,921
This! Yoink!
1144
00:57:15,989 --> 00:57:17,124
Hey, what's going on?
1145
00:57:21,861 --> 00:57:23,330
What are you assholes
doing here?
1146
00:57:30,870 --> 00:57:32,105
What's so funny?
1147
00:57:32,172 --> 00:57:34,973
Ha-ha, you've been duped,
little dude.
1148
00:57:34,975 --> 00:57:37,975
Say hello to the new
Pure Evil One.
1149
00:57:37,977 --> 00:57:39,946
Loser!
1150
00:57:40,013 --> 00:57:41,145
Hannah?
1151
00:57:45,618 --> 00:57:47,921
Hey, kids, have
a seat.
1152
00:57:47,986 --> 00:57:49,155
Ha!
1153
00:57:49,221 --> 00:57:51,524
Ah, I've gone blind!
Blind, I tells ya!
1154
00:57:51,591 --> 00:57:53,593
Uh, don't think we need
the sacks, dude.
1155
00:57:53,660 --> 00:57:55,462
They're already here.
1156
00:57:55,527 --> 00:57:57,330
But I stitched them
together by hand.
1157
00:57:57,397 --> 00:58:00,333
I even personalized them.
1158
00:58:00,399 --> 00:58:04,167
Oh, thank God,
it was only a dream.
1159
00:58:04,169 --> 00:58:05,538
What the hell's
going on here?
1160
00:58:05,605 --> 00:58:06,973
Can I keep
this sack?
1161
00:58:07,040 --> 00:58:09,276
Kids, I know I'm
not perfect.
1162
00:58:09,341 --> 00:58:11,044
I admit I have
a few flaws,
1163
00:58:11,109 --> 00:58:13,176
and I've made a few
teensy mistakes,
1164
00:58:13,178 --> 00:58:15,447
but you must believe
me when I say this.
1165
00:58:15,515 --> 00:58:17,049
Todd is in danger!
1166
00:58:17,116 --> 00:58:18,518
Todd's always in danger.
1167
00:58:18,585 --> 00:58:21,388
True, but this time,
it's grave danger!
1168
00:58:21,453 --> 00:58:22,853
Have you ever
been betrayed
1169
00:58:22,855 --> 00:58:24,224
by someone you cared
about, Atticus?
1170
00:58:24,290 --> 00:58:27,227
Well, my father did force me
to have sex with a wolf.
1171
00:58:27,292 --> 00:58:30,863
Then, you should know
it hurts, a lot.
1172
00:58:30,930 --> 00:58:31,964
Hmm.
1173
00:58:32,031 --> 00:58:34,198
Oh, look, Jenny, when a dude
thinks with his dick,
1174
00:58:34,200 --> 00:58:35,569
he's not thinking
with his brain.
1175
00:58:35,634 --> 00:58:38,305
He's thinking with
his lower head.
1176
00:58:38,370 --> 00:58:40,039
His dick head.
1177
00:58:40,105 --> 00:58:41,871
That's proven science.
1178
00:58:41,873 --> 00:58:44,310
I can't listen to any
more of this bullshit.
1179
00:58:44,377 --> 00:58:45,978
Are you coming, Curtis?
1180
00:58:46,044 --> 00:58:48,080
Uh...
1181
00:58:48,147 --> 00:58:49,549
Curtis?
1182
00:58:49,616 --> 00:58:51,651
Alright, stop twisting my
arm! I'll tell you!
1183
00:58:51,718 --> 00:58:53,319
Hannah's a clone.
1184
00:58:53,386 --> 00:58:55,886
Her science-y parents made
a whole pile of Hannahs
1185
00:58:55,888 --> 00:58:58,491
and, well, they're
kind of evil.
1186
00:58:58,558 --> 00:58:59,926
You're right!
1187
00:58:59,993 --> 00:59:01,393
She has to be
a clone.
1188
00:59:01,460 --> 00:59:04,096
The real Hannah could
never give Todd a boner!
1189
00:59:04,163 --> 00:59:05,899
Yeah, and come
to think of it,
1190
00:59:05,964 --> 00:59:08,334
there were all those weird
pods in that secret lab
1191
00:59:08,401 --> 00:59:09,669
under the
retirement home.
1192
00:59:09,736 --> 00:59:11,569
I bet the clones
are in there.
1193
00:59:11,571 --> 00:59:13,904
You're telling us
this now?
1194
00:59:13,906 --> 00:59:15,542
I've had a lot on
my mind.
1195
00:59:15,607 --> 00:59:17,574
Whoa, whoa, whoa,
I'm confused.
1196
00:59:17,576 --> 00:59:20,247
Did you say you
fucked a wolf?
1197
00:59:21,980 --> 00:59:24,383
To the retirement home!
1198
00:59:37,596 --> 00:59:39,232
Hannah?
1199
00:59:39,299 --> 00:59:40,600
Hannah!
1200
00:59:40,667 --> 00:59:42,235
Let me out
of here!
1201
00:59:42,301 --> 00:59:43,702
Looks like your
time has come.
1202
00:59:43,770 --> 00:59:44,704
Loser.
1203
00:59:44,770 --> 00:59:47,073
We've been looking for
the real Pure Evil One
1204
00:59:47,140 --> 00:59:48,408
for many, many years.
1205
00:59:48,473 --> 00:59:49,642
Why me?
1206
00:59:49,709 --> 00:59:51,544
Why am I the
Pure Evil One?
1207
00:59:51,611 --> 00:59:53,446
Do you even
have to ask?
1208
00:59:53,513 --> 00:59:55,315
Haven't you always felt
1209
00:59:55,381 --> 00:59:57,114
like you're different
than everyone else?
1210
00:59:57,116 --> 00:59:58,618
That no one
understands you?
1211
00:59:58,685 --> 01:00:00,487
That you're a... loser?
1212
01:00:00,553 --> 01:00:02,589
Doesn't everyone feel like
that sometimes?
1213
01:00:09,696 --> 01:00:11,297
Not like you.
1214
01:00:11,364 --> 01:00:13,400
Well, there have been
others here and there
1215
01:00:13,466 --> 01:00:15,301
over the past few
thousand years.
1216
01:00:15,368 --> 01:00:17,671
But they all turned
out to be losers.
1217
01:00:17,736 --> 01:00:19,672
Ha, I got
to admit,
1218
01:00:19,739 --> 01:00:22,142
I really thought you could
do it, little dude,
1219
01:00:22,207 --> 01:00:24,643
but you failed miserably!
1220
01:00:24,710 --> 01:00:29,248
Just like everyone
else, until now.
1221
01:00:29,314 --> 01:00:32,685
Hannah E. Williams,
at your service.
1222
01:00:32,752 --> 01:00:34,454
"Hannah E"?
1223
01:00:34,520 --> 01:00:36,989
The E is for evil,
heh-heh!
1224
01:00:37,056 --> 01:00:39,759
She's the only one with the
balls to destroy the world.
1225
01:00:39,826 --> 01:00:42,158
Actually, I don't
have balls.
1226
01:00:42,160 --> 01:00:44,263
I don't even have
a vagina.
1227
01:00:44,330 --> 01:00:45,598
Whoa.
1228
01:00:45,665 --> 01:00:48,332
Get away from
him, you bitch!
1229
01:00:48,334 --> 01:00:50,536
Your evil master plan
has come to an end,
1230
01:00:50,602 --> 01:00:51,805
you hot piece
of science-y ass.
1231
01:00:51,870 --> 01:00:55,005
We know you're not the real
Hannah but an imposter Hannah.
1232
01:00:55,007 --> 01:00:55,674
Oh, my God!
1233
01:00:55,741 --> 01:00:57,109
Where's your vagina?
1234
01:00:57,176 --> 01:00:59,779
Ugh, you are so simple-minded.
1235
01:00:59,846 --> 01:01:02,349
Hannah B. Williams was just
as much of an imposter,
1236
01:01:02,415 --> 01:01:04,050
if not more!
1237
01:01:04,116 --> 01:01:06,319
Look around you.
1238
01:01:06,386 --> 01:01:08,521
Each one of these pods
contains a Hannah clone,
1239
01:01:08,587 --> 01:01:11,156
each one a failure to
clone the Pure Evil One
1240
01:01:11,223 --> 01:01:13,690
from the DNA of the Book
of Pure Evil itself!
1241
01:01:13,692 --> 01:01:16,562
Losers one and all,
except for...
1242
01:01:16,629 --> 01:01:20,567
Me! The final clone,
Hannah E. Williams.
1243
01:01:20,632 --> 01:01:24,404
I am the purest
of pure evil!
1244
01:01:24,469 --> 01:01:26,205
Did Hannah B. Williams
have a vagina?
1245
01:01:26,272 --> 01:01:28,208
Not that it matters, really.
I'm just curious.
1246
01:01:28,274 --> 01:01:31,643
Looks like there's a lot more
than five more clones down here.
1247
01:01:31,710 --> 01:01:34,377
There's an F,
and it keeps going.
1248
01:01:34,379 --> 01:01:36,214
Wouldn't it make sense
if these ones
1249
01:01:36,216 --> 01:01:37,717
were the newer and
better clones?
1250
01:01:37,783 --> 01:01:39,318
Uh...
1251
01:01:39,384 --> 01:01:41,087
Shut up, bitch-face!
1252
01:01:41,154 --> 01:01:44,221
Keep them busy until I can suck
out Todd's Pure Evil power
1253
01:01:44,223 --> 01:01:46,359
and transfer it to myself.
1254
01:01:46,426 --> 01:01:47,694
Wait, what?
1255
01:01:47,759 --> 01:01:49,161
What does this
thing do?
1256
01:01:49,227 --> 01:01:50,729
Joke's on you,
little dude.
1257
01:01:50,797 --> 01:01:53,065
She's not the new
Pure Evil One.
1258
01:01:53,131 --> 01:01:55,501
Not yet, loser.
1259
01:01:55,567 --> 01:01:57,567
You see, my evil
scientist parents
1260
01:01:57,569 --> 01:01:59,671
worked with the
Satanic Society
1261
01:01:59,739 --> 01:02:02,242
to create a Pure Evil One
from the book itself,
1262
01:02:02,308 --> 01:02:03,676
so they didn't
have to wait
1263
01:02:03,743 --> 01:02:06,179
for the real Pure Evil
One to show up.
1264
01:02:06,245 --> 01:02:08,580
But all they succeeded in
doing was creating a vessel
1265
01:02:08,647 --> 01:02:11,584
that could contain the
power of pure evil!
1266
01:02:12,585 --> 01:02:14,083
I'm not following.
1267
01:02:14,085 --> 01:02:16,085
Shh! If we don't listen
to this exposition,
1268
01:02:16,087 --> 01:02:17,689
we'll never know what's
going on here.
1269
01:02:17,756 --> 01:02:21,360
So, I built this machine to suck
out the power of pure evil
1270
01:02:21,426 --> 01:02:24,094
from inside you, and
stick it into me!
1271
01:02:24,096 --> 01:02:27,534
Thus transforming me
into the Pure Evil One.
1272
01:02:27,600 --> 01:02:30,636
That was our secret
plan all along.
1273
01:02:30,703 --> 01:02:34,306
So, does this mean I won't
be pure evil anymore?
1274
01:02:34,372 --> 01:02:35,474
Yes!
1275
01:02:35,540 --> 01:02:37,544
It is I who will
be pure evil!
1276
01:02:37,609 --> 01:02:40,646
Awesome! Then, I'll
destroy the world.
1277
01:02:40,712 --> 01:02:42,415
Not awesome.
1278
01:02:42,482 --> 01:02:44,417
Seriously, does anyone get
what she's talking about?
1279
01:02:44,484 --> 01:02:47,654
I think we just have to stop her
from doing whatever she's doing.
1280
01:02:47,719 --> 01:02:49,286
We can totally
do that!
1281
01:02:49,288 --> 01:02:52,826
We're the gang!
Let's save Todd!
1282
01:02:59,464 --> 01:03:01,733
Whoa!
1283
01:03:05,337 --> 01:03:07,172
It's you.
1284
01:03:07,239 --> 01:03:09,473
You bet your sweet ass.
1285
01:03:09,475 --> 01:03:11,743
And how sweet it was.
1286
01:03:11,810 --> 01:03:13,812
Run!
1287
01:03:13,879 --> 01:03:16,648
Ahhh!
1288
01:03:18,651 --> 01:03:20,150
Ha!
1289
01:03:20,152 --> 01:03:21,620
Huh?
1290
01:03:27,292 --> 01:03:30,762
You remember our little date
25 year ago, Atticus?
1291
01:03:30,830 --> 01:03:33,165
Not an ideal date.
1292
01:03:33,232 --> 01:03:37,167
You were supposed to fight me,
Atticus, not submit to me.
1293
01:03:37,169 --> 01:03:40,672
No wonder your father lost
respect for you.
1294
01:03:40,739 --> 01:03:42,274
Really?
1295
01:03:42,341 --> 01:03:43,942
That explains so much.
1296
01:03:48,247 --> 01:03:51,350
Atticus, just don't be
yourself for once,
1297
01:03:51,417 --> 01:03:52,850
and stand up
to that wolf!
1298
01:03:52,852 --> 01:03:54,953
I can't do it!
1299
01:03:56,522 --> 01:03:57,657
Cowardice... too strong!
1300
01:03:57,723 --> 01:03:59,190
You can do
it, Atticus.
1301
01:03:59,192 --> 01:04:01,628
No one should let a big
dog push them around.
1302
01:04:01,694 --> 01:04:04,898
I need more... convincing.
1303
01:04:04,964 --> 01:04:08,234
Anyone else got words
of encouragement?
1304
01:04:08,301 --> 01:04:11,201
That wolf is totally
gonna rape him again.
1305
01:04:11,203 --> 01:04:15,371
You can so totally beat up
that huge supernatural wolf.
1306
01:04:17,209 --> 01:04:21,381
If Jimmy thinks I can
do it, then I shall!
1307
01:04:22,915 --> 01:04:25,852
I won't submit
this time!
1308
01:04:25,917 --> 01:04:28,520
Shit-rooster!
1309
01:04:33,292 --> 01:04:35,862
Argh!
1310
01:04:38,397 --> 01:04:41,232
Ugh, what the fuck
is with that mop?
1311
01:04:41,234 --> 01:04:42,768
I did it.
1312
01:04:42,835 --> 01:04:44,400
I faced down the wolf!
1313
01:04:44,402 --> 01:04:46,406
I've never felt so
free!
1314
01:04:46,471 --> 01:04:48,607
Not free!
1315
01:04:51,910 --> 01:04:53,245
Ahhhh!
1316
01:04:55,080 --> 01:04:56,882
Whoa, whoa, wait.
1317
01:04:56,948 --> 01:04:59,585
Nikki, I know you're deep down
inside those dudes somewhere.
1318
01:04:59,652 --> 01:05:00,853
Not a chance!
1319
01:05:00,919 --> 01:05:02,921
She ain't coming back.
1320
01:05:02,989 --> 01:05:05,254
Not for you, loser.
1321
01:05:05,256 --> 01:05:07,292
Look, I still love
you, Nikki.
1322
01:05:07,359 --> 01:05:08,926
Come back and let's run
away together,
1323
01:05:08,928 --> 01:05:11,594
far from the Book
of Pure Evil.
1324
01:05:11,596 --> 01:05:13,899
Just stop hurting
my friends.
1325
01:05:13,966 --> 01:05:16,035
No!
1326
01:05:16,102 --> 01:05:18,304
Not this time, bitch!
1327
01:05:18,370 --> 01:05:20,038
Got to fight the
pull, dudes.
1328
01:05:20,105 --> 01:05:24,776
Fight through love!
1329
01:05:31,783 --> 01:05:33,385
Jimmy.
1330
01:05:33,451 --> 01:05:34,587
Nikki!
1331
01:05:34,654 --> 01:05:35,989
Did you mean what
you said?
1332
01:05:36,055 --> 01:05:39,457
Does a turkey bird
have a feathered cock?
1333
01:05:39,459 --> 01:05:40,826
Come here, baby.
1334
01:05:40,893 --> 01:05:41,995
Mmm!
1335
01:05:42,060 --> 01:05:43,997
You don't care that I'm
also three dudes?
1336
01:05:44,062 --> 01:05:46,298
Yeah, and a fucking
awesome wolf.
1337
01:05:46,364 --> 01:05:47,966
I just won the lottery.
1338
01:05:48,033 --> 01:05:49,736
Mmm!
1339
01:05:53,638 --> 01:05:54,973
Yummy.
1340
01:05:57,475 --> 01:05:59,845
A little to the
left, yes! Yes!
1341
01:05:59,911 --> 01:06:03,348
Eat shit and die from
eating shit, Hannah E!
1342
01:06:09,489 --> 01:06:12,489
That was a lot easier than
I thought it would be.
1343
01:06:12,491 --> 01:06:13,893
Let's wrap this
up, kids.
1344
01:06:16,663 --> 01:06:18,661
Is it too late?
1345
01:06:18,663 --> 01:06:19,931
Am I still pure evil?
1346
01:06:19,998 --> 01:06:21,767
We saved you just
in time.
1347
01:06:21,834 --> 01:06:23,703
Evil Hannah is dead.
1348
01:06:23,768 --> 01:06:25,669
Not so fast!
1349
01:06:25,671 --> 01:06:29,007
Feast your eyes on
Hannah F. Williams!
1350
01:06:29,075 --> 01:06:29,975
Oh, that's pretty hot.
1351
01:06:30,042 --> 01:06:32,676
Do I want to know what
the F stands for?
1352
01:06:32,678 --> 01:06:33,844
Freak?
1353
01:06:33,846 --> 01:06:35,048
Fair maiden?
1354
01:06:35,114 --> 01:06:36,683
Flabbergasted? Oh,
wait, that's just me.
1355
01:06:36,748 --> 01:06:39,683
The F stands for
"I'm gonna fuck you up!"
1356
01:06:39,685 --> 01:06:41,888
That starts with an I,
doesn't it?
1357
01:06:44,857 --> 01:06:46,857
Stand back, kids.
1358
01:06:46,859 --> 01:06:49,395
This is a job
for a janitor.
1359
01:06:49,462 --> 01:06:53,029
Which is
what I am!
1360
01:06:53,031 --> 01:06:54,667
Time to clean
up this mess.
1361
01:06:54,734 --> 01:06:56,134
Ha!
1362
01:06:56,201 --> 01:06:58,671
Arrrgh!
1363
01:07:00,906 --> 01:07:02,741
No offense, dude,
1364
01:07:02,808 --> 01:07:04,143
but you're a
shitty janitor.
1365
01:07:04,210 --> 01:07:05,545
Hi-ya!
1366
01:07:05,611 --> 01:07:07,379
Ah! Get 'em, Nikki!
1367
01:07:08,980 --> 01:07:11,383
Todd, you have to get
out of here.
1368
01:07:11,450 --> 01:07:12,819
We can't risk this
new Hannah
1369
01:07:12,884 --> 01:07:14,821
stealing what's left of
your pure evil power.
1370
01:07:14,886 --> 01:07:17,721
No... must fight.
1371
01:07:17,723 --> 01:07:19,556
You're too weak
to fight!
1372
01:07:19,558 --> 01:07:22,027
Can't leave... my friends.
1373
01:07:22,093 --> 01:07:24,763
You have to run away
to save the world, Todd!
1374
01:07:24,830 --> 01:07:26,998
That's your real destiny.
1375
01:07:27,065 --> 01:07:29,736
Flee, Todd! Flee!
1376
01:07:29,801 --> 01:07:31,067
Argh, I'm punching!
1377
01:07:31,069 --> 01:07:32,569
I'm punching!
Now I'm kicking!
1378
01:07:32,571 --> 01:07:33,905
Now I'm... whoa!
1379
01:07:33,973 --> 01:07:35,108
Ouch.
1380
01:07:35,174 --> 01:07:36,406
It's too late.
1381
01:07:36,408 --> 01:07:39,678
Enough of Todd's pure evil power
has been sucked into the book.
1382
01:07:39,745 --> 01:07:42,515
Now all I have to do is get
into the machine
1383
01:07:42,580 --> 01:07:45,084
and have the power
transferred into me!
1384
01:07:45,151 --> 01:07:47,120
I'm gonna fuck
you up!
1385
01:07:47,185 --> 01:07:49,788
Pure evil or not,
I've got to help my friends.
1386
01:07:49,855 --> 01:07:51,922
Somehow.
1387
01:07:53,591 --> 01:07:54,760
I know that voice!
1388
01:07:59,198 --> 01:08:01,768
Argh!
1389
01:08:07,605 --> 01:08:09,575
I'm sorry, Hannah.
1390
01:08:10,142 --> 01:08:11,143
What?
1391
01:08:12,944 --> 01:08:15,147
Well, we all knew
that was coming.
1392
01:08:15,214 --> 01:08:16,649
Oh, that's
pretty hot.
1393
01:08:19,952 --> 01:08:21,587
Da-da?
1394
01:08:21,653 --> 01:08:24,022
Brax! Holy shit, dude.
You've grown!
1395
01:08:25,590 --> 01:08:27,459
Whoa!
1396
01:08:27,526 --> 01:08:28,961
Ugh, big boy, ease up!
1397
01:08:29,028 --> 01:08:31,128
Da-da! Da-da!
1398
01:08:31,130 --> 01:08:33,565
I missed you
too, buddy.
1399
01:08:33,631 --> 01:08:36,568
Ahh!
1400
01:08:36,635 --> 01:08:38,468
Ha!
1401
01:08:38,470 --> 01:08:39,939
Stupid book!
1402
01:08:40,005 --> 01:08:41,908
Ugh!
1403
01:08:41,974 --> 01:08:44,975
I told you I don't
have a vagina!
1404
01:08:44,977 --> 01:08:47,647
But you got eyes,
motherfucker!
1405
01:08:54,620 --> 01:08:56,988
Ugh, so much blood.
1406
01:09:06,831 --> 01:09:10,502
Get ready for Hannah I!
1407
01:09:10,568 --> 01:09:15,707
The I stands for
"I'm gonna fuck you up!"
1408
01:09:15,773 --> 01:09:17,276
Get some new material.
1409
01:09:17,343 --> 01:09:21,680
I just flew into town, and boy,
are my arms... deadly!
1410
01:09:21,746 --> 01:09:24,149
Whoa!
1411
01:09:24,215 --> 01:09:27,517
Curtis, use your arm!
1412
01:09:27,519 --> 01:09:29,186
Ow! Ooh! Eeh!
1413
01:09:29,188 --> 01:09:31,724
It shorted out!
1414
01:09:36,929 --> 01:09:40,833
Don't worry, it's
Atticus time.
1415
01:09:40,899 --> 01:09:42,700
Eat mug in sock, bitch.
1416
01:09:42,702 --> 01:09:45,037
Oh!
1417
01:09:45,104 --> 01:09:47,306
Yum!
1418
01:09:50,975 --> 01:09:52,577
Brax attack!
1419
01:09:55,080 --> 01:09:57,250
Ugh!
1420
01:10:03,054 --> 01:10:05,722
And we're fucked.
1421
01:10:05,724 --> 01:10:07,093
I guess this is it, baby.
1422
01:10:07,158 --> 01:10:09,929
At least we got a chance
to be in love again,
1423
01:10:09,995 --> 01:10:11,227
one last time.
1424
01:10:11,229 --> 01:10:15,067
If this is gonna be the end of
the world, at least I can say...
1425
01:10:15,134 --> 01:10:16,836
I love you,
Jennifer Kolinsky.
1426
01:10:16,902 --> 01:10:18,938
And I love you,
Toddrick Smith.
1427
01:10:19,004 --> 01:10:22,041
Now my dead girlfriend's
clone is gonna eat us.
1428
01:10:24,009 --> 01:10:26,575
Todd, stop poking me.
1429
01:10:26,577 --> 01:10:29,281
What?
1430
01:10:29,982 --> 01:10:31,248
Todd, your boner is back!
1431
01:10:31,250 --> 01:10:32,749
My boner is back!
1432
01:10:32,751 --> 01:10:34,287
His boner is back!
1433
01:10:34,353 --> 01:10:37,723
I'm not gonna die before I get
a chance to use this boner!
1434
01:10:37,790 --> 01:10:40,926
Brax, toss me.
1435
01:10:40,992 --> 01:10:42,260
Ugh!
1436
01:10:42,327 --> 01:10:44,796
Whoaaa!
1437
01:10:44,862 --> 01:10:46,264
Whoa!
1438
01:10:46,331 --> 01:10:49,098
Destroy the pods!
1439
01:10:51,103 --> 01:10:52,936
Yah!
1440
01:11:05,785 --> 01:11:08,619
I'll take care of this
one, Brax.
1441
01:11:08,621 --> 01:11:10,056
Whoa!
1442
01:11:10,121 --> 01:11:12,621
Whoa! Ahhh!
1443
01:11:26,304 --> 01:11:28,940
Todd?
1444
01:11:31,676 --> 01:11:33,011
I'm fine.
1445
01:11:33,077 --> 01:11:34,245
Todd!
1446
01:11:45,056 --> 01:11:48,094
I'm not just fine.
1447
01:11:48,160 --> 01:11:49,996
I'm fucking awesome.
1448
01:11:50,062 --> 01:11:54,300
Awesome! Yeah!
1449
01:11:54,366 --> 01:11:55,935
Hey, guys?
1450
01:11:56,001 --> 01:11:58,437
Rowr!
1451
01:12:00,872 --> 01:12:03,209
Wait!
1452
01:12:04,977 --> 01:12:06,379
This one's different.
1453
01:12:06,444 --> 01:12:08,313
No, I'm not, Curtis.
1454
01:12:08,380 --> 01:12:10,016
I remember everything.
1455
01:12:10,081 --> 01:12:11,950
I remember cheating on you
with Todd.
1456
01:12:12,017 --> 01:12:13,952
I remember trying to kill
the whole gang.
1457
01:12:14,019 --> 01:12:16,222
I remember wanting to
destroy the world.
1458
01:12:16,287 --> 01:12:19,125
You should just put me
out of my misery.
1459
01:12:19,190 --> 01:12:23,295
You need to hear this.
1460
01:12:23,362 --> 01:12:27,366
This is the final recording
of Dr. Williams.
1461
01:12:27,433 --> 01:12:30,366
Just Dr. Cynthia Williams.
1462
01:12:30,368 --> 01:12:33,038
I'm leaving Dr.
Bob Williams.
1463
01:12:33,104 --> 01:12:35,371
I realized he's an
evil man,
1464
01:12:35,373 --> 01:12:38,978
and this has all been
a huge mistake.
1465
01:12:39,044 --> 01:12:41,712
And he just can't pleasure
me anymore.
1466
01:12:41,714 --> 01:12:44,417
I can't change
what I've done,
1467
01:12:44,483 --> 01:12:46,986
but I can try to
fix it.
1468
01:12:47,051 --> 01:12:50,053
I've made one
last clone,
1469
01:12:50,055 --> 01:12:53,224
but this time, without the
DNA of pure evil.
1470
01:12:53,291 --> 01:12:58,263
She'll be my real
daughter, Hannah.
1471
01:12:58,330 --> 01:13:01,100
I'm going to destroy all
the evil clones.
1472
01:13:01,166 --> 01:13:03,869
We're going to run away
and be a real family,
1473
01:13:03,935 --> 01:13:06,839
just her and me.
Tonight, we'll...
1474
01:13:06,904 --> 01:13:09,207
Cynthia! What
are you doing?
1475
01:13:09,273 --> 01:13:12,111
Bob! No,
you can't stop me.
1476
01:13:12,176 --> 01:13:15,078
Is it because I just can't
pleasure you anymore?
1477
01:13:15,080 --> 01:13:16,745
Minions, get her!
1478
01:13:16,747 --> 01:13:18,517
And turn off that cassette
recorder.
1479
01:13:18,584 --> 01:13:20,051
Yes,
your evil-ness.
1480
01:13:20,118 --> 01:13:21,453
But which button
do I press?
1481
01:13:21,519 --> 01:13:22,888
Just do it!
1482
01:13:22,955 --> 01:13:23,823
Let go!
1483
01:13:23,889 --> 01:13:25,891
How do I turn
it off? Do I...
1484
01:13:25,957 --> 01:13:26,959
Don't
touch that!
1485
01:13:27,024 --> 01:13:29,092
What if I push two
of them together?
1486
01:13:29,094 --> 01:13:29,962
These two buttons?
1487
01:13:30,028 --> 01:13:31,263
No, that's the
volume, dumbass!
1488
01:13:32,497 --> 01:13:34,399
Haven't you ever seen
a cassette recorder before?
1489
01:13:34,465 --> 01:13:35,767
What are
you saying?
1490
01:13:35,834 --> 01:13:37,435
Which button do I press,
this button?
1491
01:13:37,502 --> 01:13:38,636
No!
1492
01:13:38,737 --> 01:13:40,873
Or this button, or this
button, or this button
1493
01:13:40,938 --> 01:13:42,874
Stop it! Which button
is it, Cynthia!
1494
01:13:42,940 --> 01:13:44,076
No! I'll
never tell!
1495
01:13:44,143 --> 01:13:45,877
I'm just
gonna smash it, then.
1496
01:13:47,511 --> 01:13:49,380
So, I'm not evil?
1497
01:13:49,447 --> 01:13:50,482
Not a bit, Hannah.
1498
01:13:50,549 --> 01:13:52,484
So, I can be back
in the gang?
1499
01:13:52,550 --> 01:13:53,818
Eh, why not?
1500
01:13:53,885 --> 01:13:55,286
We let that
asshole back in.
1501
01:13:55,354 --> 01:13:58,791
Really? I'm a
gang member?
1502
01:13:58,857 --> 01:14:01,426
I think you've
proven yourself.
1503
01:14:01,492 --> 01:14:05,230
Wait. What about her?
1504
01:14:05,296 --> 01:14:07,433
Yeah, what's
stopping you
1505
01:14:07,498 --> 01:14:09,335
from splitting into
the metal dudes again?
1506
01:14:09,401 --> 01:14:10,435
Don't worry.
1507
01:14:10,501 --> 01:14:13,404
The power of true love
will keep me in this form.
1508
01:14:13,471 --> 01:14:14,806
So, no wolf?
1509
01:14:14,872 --> 01:14:16,241
Damn it.
1510
01:14:16,308 --> 01:14:19,078
I was gonna ride that dude
around and feed him beer.
1511
01:14:19,144 --> 01:14:23,415
But someone, or something, will
inevitably take their place.
1512
01:14:23,482 --> 01:14:26,352
When that day comes,
we'll be ready.
1513
01:14:27,553 --> 01:14:29,955
It's good to have you back,
Hannah.
1514
01:14:30,022 --> 01:14:33,158
But I can't help but wonder
how you're the only good Hannah.
1515
01:14:33,224 --> 01:14:36,161
Hannah B. Williams seemed
pretty goody-two-shoes.
1516
01:14:36,228 --> 01:14:38,831
Oh, Hannah B. did cheat
on tests.
1517
01:14:38,897 --> 01:14:40,496
And she liked to torture
small animals
1518
01:14:40,498 --> 01:14:41,934
when people weren't looking.
1519
01:14:42,000 --> 01:14:44,370
Do you have a vagina?
1520
01:14:44,435 --> 01:14:45,938
Big time!
1521
01:14:46,004 --> 01:14:47,605
Well, not big-big.
1522
01:14:47,672 --> 01:14:51,544
I totally have one,
not that I'd have half of one.
1523
01:14:51,609 --> 01:14:53,011
Maybe it is big.
1524
01:14:53,077 --> 01:14:55,480
I've never compared it
to others.
1525
01:15:04,857 --> 01:15:06,492
♪ Life is good
1526
01:15:06,558 --> 01:15:09,127
♪ My dick is back
1527
01:15:09,193 --> 01:15:11,629
♪ I'm so fucking awesome
1528
01:15:11,697 --> 01:15:14,233
♪ In the sack
1529
01:15:14,299 --> 01:15:17,269
♪ I guess I can't
complain ♪
1530
01:15:19,604 --> 01:15:21,973
♪ Life's okay
1531
01:15:22,040 --> 01:15:24,540
♪ Let's leave it at
that ♪
1532
01:15:24,542 --> 01:15:29,480
♪ Todd is so-so in
the sack ♪
1533
01:15:29,547 --> 01:15:34,420
♪ Eh, I guess I
can't complain ♪
1534
01:15:34,486 --> 01:15:39,892
♪ Except for the fact
that the book is back ♪
1535
01:15:39,957 --> 01:15:44,929
♪ Again and again
and again ♪
1536
01:15:48,000 --> 01:15:50,536
♪ Yes life is good
1537
01:15:50,602 --> 01:15:53,339
♪ My girl is back
1538
01:15:53,404 --> 01:15:55,340
♪ And I'm happy
to say ♪
1539
01:15:55,407 --> 01:15:58,611
♪ She's not an
evil skank ♪
1540
01:15:58,676 --> 01:16:03,948
♪ I guess I can't
complain ♪
1541
01:16:04,015 --> 01:16:06,218
♪ Yes life is good
1542
01:16:06,285 --> 01:16:09,388
♪ I know who I am
1543
01:16:09,453 --> 01:16:13,089
♪ I've got myself
a sweet loving man ♪
1544
01:16:13,091 --> 01:16:14,259
Hey, I'm a man!
1545
01:16:14,326 --> 01:16:19,364
♪ I guess I can't
complain ♪
1546
01:16:19,430 --> 01:16:22,097
♪ Except for the fact
1547
01:16:22,099 --> 01:16:24,569
♪ That the book
is back ♪
1548
01:16:24,635 --> 01:16:29,974
♪ Again and again
and again ♪
1549
01:16:30,041 --> 01:16:34,110
But what about me?
Atticus P. Murphy.
1550
01:16:34,112 --> 01:16:36,614
I'm ready to
pound some ass.
1551
01:16:36,681 --> 01:16:38,216
Dude, we've been
over this.
1552
01:16:38,282 --> 01:16:40,419
Oh, right.
1553
01:16:40,484 --> 01:16:44,656
♪ To kick some
motherfucking ass ♪
1554
01:16:44,723 --> 01:16:50,162
♪ Except for the fact
that the book is back ♪
1555
01:16:50,228 --> 01:16:55,200
♪ Again and again
and again ♪
1556
01:16:58,303 --> 01:17:03,640
♪ But we will never
surrender ♪
1557
01:17:03,642 --> 01:17:08,246
♪ We are the great
defenders ♪
1558
01:17:08,313 --> 01:17:11,317
♪ Kicking evil
in the nuts ♪
1559
01:17:11,382 --> 01:17:13,685
♪ With very mixed results
1560
01:17:13,751 --> 01:17:17,622
♪ This is our destiny
1561
01:17:18,989 --> 01:17:22,227
♪ This is our destiny
1562
01:17:23,461 --> 01:17:28,299
♪ This is our destiny
1563
01:17:30,001 --> 01:17:32,671
Arrrrgh!
1564
01:17:32,737 --> 01:17:35,004
Ahhh!
1565
01:17:35,006 --> 01:17:38,174
And destiny doesn't suck.
1566
01:17:39,510 --> 01:17:42,147
I just wanted to see boobs!
1567
01:20:14,465 --> 01:20:18,303
Hooooly,
you finish it!
111360
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