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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,336 --> 00:00:04,233 ♪ Crazy is when I go off the rails ♪ 2 00:00:04,258 --> 00:00:07,292 ♪ This is what you've done to me ♪ 3 00:00:07,294 --> 00:00:10,028 ♪ Crazy is how your loving makes me feel ♪ 4 00:00:10,030 --> 00:00:13,187 ♪ This is what I always want to be ♪ 5 00:00:13,212 --> 00:00:16,156 ♪ I like it when a girl gets crazy in bed ♪ 6 00:00:16,181 --> 00:00:19,242 ♪ Don't mess with the bitch who's crazy in the head ♪ 7 00:00:20,695 --> 00:00:22,101 - ♪ You do ♪ - ♪ You don't ♪ 8 00:00:22,126 --> 00:00:23,592 ♪ Want to be crazy ♪ 9 00:00:23,617 --> 00:00:24,914 - ♪ And you don't ♪ - ♪ You do ♪ 10 00:00:24,939 --> 00:00:26,238 ♪ Want to be crazy ♪ 11 00:00:26,263 --> 00:00:30,099 ♪ To clarify, yes, no on the crazy ♪ 12 00:00:30,420 --> 00:00:33,085 ♪ We hope this helps. ♪ 13 00:00:34,916 --> 00:00:35,859 What? 14 00:00:35,883 --> 00:00:37,375 -- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe -- -- www.addic7ed.com -- 15 00:00:37,391 --> 00:00:39,157 Previously on Crazy Ex-Girlfriend... 16 00:00:39,159 --> 00:00:40,359 If I'm crazy, 17 00:00:40,361 --> 00:00:41,493 you made me crazier 18 00:00:41,495 --> 00:00:43,528 because your life is broken and boring. 19 00:00:43,530 --> 00:00:45,631 I'm sick and tired of you! I want you out of my life! 20 00:00:45,633 --> 00:00:46,921 REBECCA: I've officially alienated 21 00:00:46,938 --> 00:00:48,271 every person I know. 22 00:00:48,273 --> 00:00:50,073 I give up. 23 00:00:50,075 --> 00:00:51,474 I'll come home. 24 00:00:51,476 --> 00:00:53,776 Darling, it's time that I take over the reins of your life. 25 00:00:53,778 --> 00:00:55,078 You're incapable. 26 00:00:55,080 --> 00:00:57,046 You made me think that you loved me. 27 00:00:57,821 --> 00:01:00,016 You gave me hope when I had none. 28 00:01:00,018 --> 00:01:01,954 And now, that hope is gone. 29 00:01:02,320 --> 00:01:05,048 - Is everything okay? - I need help. 30 00:01:11,180 --> 00:01:13,180 _ 31 00:01:16,334 --> 00:01:18,835 Oh, sorry. 32 00:01:20,205 --> 00:01:21,637 She's okay. 33 00:01:21,639 --> 00:01:23,005 She's out of the woods for now. 34 00:01:23,007 --> 00:01:24,702 - Oh... - Oh, thank God. 35 00:01:24,727 --> 00:01:26,117 I knew she'd be fine. 36 00:01:26,142 --> 00:01:28,079 The minute I heard, that's what I told myself. 37 00:01:28,104 --> 00:01:30,376 All right, I got to get back in there. 38 00:01:30,618 --> 00:01:32,413 Dr. Akopian is leaving, 39 00:01:32,415 --> 00:01:34,517 and Rebecca needs somebody in the room with her at all times. 40 00:01:34,542 --> 00:01:36,946 Uh, they assigned a nurse to be her “sitter” or something, 41 00:01:36,971 --> 00:01:38,993 but I got rid of her. And so, now, 42 00:01:39,018 --> 00:01:43,446 all I have to do is fend off a very overeager housekeeper 43 00:01:43,471 --> 00:01:45,235 who just keeps interrupting for no reason. 44 00:01:45,260 --> 00:01:46,727 - VALENCIA: Paula. - Yeah? 45 00:01:46,752 --> 00:01:48,188 You don't have to do this by yourself. 46 00:01:48,213 --> 00:01:49,978 We can help, we can take turns. 47 00:01:50,009 --> 00:01:51,409 Yeah, you have a family at home. 48 00:01:51,411 --> 00:01:52,710 Don't be silly. Rebecca needs me. 49 00:01:52,712 --> 00:01:54,431 And my family will understand. 50 00:01:55,595 --> 00:01:57,181 Actually, there is another way you guys can help. 51 00:01:57,183 --> 00:01:59,884 So, she knows everyone is hearing about what happened. 52 00:01:59,886 --> 00:02:01,538 I mean, her phone is blowing up... 53 00:02:01,563 --> 00:02:04,622 Lots of concerned people, really sweet, very annoying. 54 00:02:04,624 --> 00:02:07,281 Could you please just let everyone know that she's okay? 55 00:02:07,306 --> 00:02:08,993 I could do it. I'll get in touch with everyone. 56 00:02:08,995 --> 00:02:09,960 I want to help. 57 00:02:09,962 --> 00:02:11,896 - Oh, great. - Hey. 58 00:02:12,103 --> 00:02:15,332 - I got here as fast as I could. - Why? 59 00:02:15,923 --> 00:02:19,170 - Is Rebecca okay? - For now. Josh, you need to leave. 60 00:02:19,501 --> 00:02:22,306 I can't have Rebecca seeing you or hearing you. 61 00:02:22,331 --> 00:02:24,314 I don't want her to be upset. 62 00:02:24,339 --> 00:02:26,372 In fact, I am worried 63 00:02:26,374 --> 00:02:28,408 that your body spray is gonna waft into her room 64 00:02:28,410 --> 00:02:29,909 and she's gonna know that you're here, 65 00:02:29,934 --> 00:02:32,935 so leave... without wafting. 66 00:02:34,516 --> 00:02:35,548 (Paula sighs) 67 00:02:35,550 --> 00:02:37,917 Dude, you should go. 68 00:02:37,919 --> 00:02:39,452 But I want to talk to Rebecca. 69 00:02:39,454 --> 00:02:41,754 I mean, last time I saw her, we had a really bad fight 70 00:02:41,756 --> 00:02:44,023 and I said I wanted her to go away, which I did, 71 00:02:44,025 --> 00:02:46,626 but not in, like, a permanent way. 72 00:02:47,727 --> 00:02:49,160 Will you at least tell her I was here? 73 00:02:49,996 --> 00:02:51,957 - No... - No. 74 00:02:52,575 --> 00:02:55,082 I'm so sorry, Dr. Akopian. 75 00:02:56,994 --> 00:02:58,193 I failed you. 76 00:02:59,661 --> 00:03:02,719 - God, I'm such a coward. - You were no such thing. 77 00:03:02,744 --> 00:03:03,943 No such thing. 78 00:03:03,945 --> 00:03:06,312 You were brave. You asked for help. 79 00:03:06,314 --> 00:03:08,047 Brave. Asked for help. 80 00:03:08,533 --> 00:03:10,119 Just agreeing with you. 81 00:03:12,031 --> 00:03:14,532 I'll let you get some rest, but don't worry, 82 00:03:14,557 --> 00:03:17,333 there are some great psychiatrists on staff here, 83 00:03:17,553 --> 00:03:20,049 and we'll work together to get you the right help. 84 00:03:24,778 --> 00:03:26,455 Thank you. 85 00:03:29,137 --> 00:03:30,984 - Hi. - Hi. 86 00:03:31,531 --> 00:03:33,172 Are the girls still here? 87 00:03:33,174 --> 00:03:34,907 Oh, yeah. No, we're all here. 88 00:03:34,909 --> 00:03:37,643 # GirlGroup4Evah. (laughs) 89 00:03:37,929 --> 00:03:39,912 - Are they mad at me? - No. 90 00:03:39,914 --> 00:03:42,248 - No one is mad. - (door opens) 91 00:03:42,250 --> 00:03:44,172 Not now, Denise! 92 00:03:44,819 --> 00:03:47,353 Denise, what did I say? 93 00:03:47,355 --> 00:03:49,922 Sweetie, do you need anything? 94 00:03:49,924 --> 00:03:54,289 No, um, no, I think I'm just gonna go to sleep. 95 00:03:54,629 --> 00:03:57,843 Oh. Oh, God. 96 00:03:58,347 --> 00:04:01,181 Oh, I'm so embarrassed that I caused such a scene. 97 00:04:01,797 --> 00:04:04,851 And I didn't, I didn't even want to die. 98 00:04:05,502 --> 00:04:07,635 I just wanted the pain to stop. 99 00:04:07,942 --> 00:04:09,675 I know. 100 00:04:09,984 --> 00:04:12,612 (sniffles) It's like I was out of stories 101 00:04:12,614 --> 00:04:14,614 to tell myself that things would be okay. 102 00:04:15,523 --> 00:04:18,117 I just feel like I inconvenienced a lot of people. 103 00:04:18,119 --> 00:04:20,890 No, no, no, no. No, you didn't. 104 00:04:21,422 --> 00:04:24,524 And don't you worry about anyone else right now, okay? 105 00:04:24,526 --> 00:04:27,493 - (sniffles) Okay. - Okay. 106 00:04:27,495 --> 00:04:29,762 ♪ ♪ 107 00:04:33,462 --> 00:04:35,596 (clears throat) 108 00:04:35,620 --> 00:04:37,604 _ 109 00:04:37,605 --> 00:04:39,572 (typing) 110 00:04:39,574 --> 00:04:44,544 (reading words on screen): _ 111 00:04:45,680 --> 00:04:47,413 Hmm. 112 00:04:47,437 --> 00:04:48,982 _ 113 00:04:48,983 --> 00:04:50,383 (clears throat) 114 00:04:50,407 --> 00:04:52,407 _ 115 00:04:59,490 --> 00:05:02,295 - Hey, boss. So, the whole office... - (clears throat) 116 00:05:02,297 --> 00:05:04,396 ... is going in on a cupcake basket for Rebecca. 117 00:05:04,421 --> 00:05:06,254 Do you want to kick in some money or... 118 00:05:06,279 --> 00:05:07,427 probably doing your own thing? 119 00:05:07,452 --> 00:05:09,018 Yeah. No, I'm-I'm doing my own thing. 120 00:05:09,043 --> 00:05:10,747 Okay, so no money from you, then. 121 00:05:11,029 --> 00:05:13,239 Because I do need an extra eight bucks 122 00:05:13,241 --> 00:05:14,540 and I can't find Darryl. 123 00:05:14,542 --> 00:05:15,775 Called and texted him. 124 00:05:15,777 --> 00:05:18,411 He's at a yurt with his boyfriend or something. 125 00:05:18,413 --> 00:05:19,865 Uh, he probably doesn't have cell service. 126 00:05:20,248 --> 00:05:22,563 Are you okay? 127 00:05:22,588 --> 00:05:25,284 This must be tough, and I know you care about her. 128 00:05:25,286 --> 00:05:28,421 - George, we're done here. - For sure. Uh-huh. 129 00:05:31,092 --> 00:05:35,995 (sighs) All right, I just have to do this. 130 00:05:35,997 --> 00:05:37,930 I'm gonna do it. 131 00:05:37,932 --> 00:05:38,931 (phone beeps) 132 00:05:38,933 --> 00:05:41,534 Hi, everyone, I'm Valencia Perez, 133 00:05:41,536 --> 00:05:42,768 Rebecca Bunch's friend. 134 00:05:42,770 --> 00:05:44,804 I wanted to just post a quick update on Rebecca 135 00:05:44,806 --> 00:05:47,073 because I know a lot of people are worried about her. 136 00:05:47,386 --> 00:05:51,077 Rebecca went through a tough time a few days ago, obviously, 137 00:05:51,079 --> 00:05:52,278 but she's stable now 138 00:05:52,280 --> 00:05:54,280 and she appreciates everyone thinking about her. 139 00:05:54,479 --> 00:05:56,515 If you want to connect with her, 140 00:05:56,517 --> 00:05:58,584 you can just write in the comments below 141 00:05:58,586 --> 00:06:00,486 and I will make sure she gets the message. 142 00:06:00,488 --> 00:06:02,585 - Thanks, all. - (phone beeps) 143 00:06:02,610 --> 00:06:04,824 You're posting a video? 144 00:06:04,826 --> 00:06:07,660 I thought you were gonna, like, e-mail people. 145 00:06:07,662 --> 00:06:08,894 Seemed impersonal. 146 00:06:08,896 --> 00:06:10,596 I thought a Facebook video would be better. 147 00:06:10,598 --> 00:06:12,431 I asked Paula, and she said Rebecca thought 148 00:06:12,433 --> 00:06:13,566 it was a great idea. 149 00:06:13,568 --> 00:06:15,101 Okay, sounds good. 150 00:06:15,103 --> 00:06:18,304 Oh, where should I put these chips? 151 00:06:18,815 --> 00:06:21,340 Um, why is he here? 152 00:06:21,342 --> 00:06:24,810 Well, we were supposed to go on our third date 153 00:06:24,812 --> 00:06:28,280 and I was gonna cancel, but then he didn't want me to be alone. 154 00:06:28,282 --> 00:06:30,650 - (chuckles) - That's sweet, right? 155 00:06:30,652 --> 00:06:32,151 Yeah, sure. 156 00:06:32,153 --> 00:06:34,654 I didn't know a friend's suicide attempt was a plus one event, 157 00:06:34,656 --> 00:06:35,988 but cool. 158 00:06:35,990 --> 00:06:37,923 (quietly): I told you she might be mad. 159 00:06:37,925 --> 00:06:39,091 She gets like this. 160 00:06:39,093 --> 00:06:40,693 In third grade, she cut off my rat-tail 161 00:06:40,695 --> 00:06:42,094 'cause I sat in her desk once. 162 00:06:42,096 --> 00:06:45,364 Hector, just unpack the cheese puffs... also, rat-tail? 163 00:06:45,536 --> 00:06:47,166 So many questions. 164 00:06:47,168 --> 00:06:48,801 Valencia, let's not be controlling. 165 00:06:48,803 --> 00:06:49,969 I don't think there are, like, 166 00:06:49,971 --> 00:06:52,138 rules for this kind of situation. 167 00:06:52,140 --> 00:06:53,650 (sighs) You're right. 168 00:06:53,809 --> 00:06:55,474 It's a tough time. 169 00:06:55,476 --> 00:06:56,997 We should be gentle with each other. 170 00:06:58,404 --> 00:07:01,138 - Bitch, don't get in my way, bitch. - (yelps) 171 00:07:02,551 --> 00:07:04,817 Are you sure you don't need to go be at home? 172 00:07:04,819 --> 00:07:06,752 What about your kids? 173 00:07:06,754 --> 00:07:09,522 And... the girls... I mean, they haven't been to their jobs 174 00:07:09,524 --> 00:07:11,891 or anything in days; I just feel so bad. 175 00:07:11,893 --> 00:07:13,793 It's fine, it is fine. 176 00:07:13,795 --> 00:07:14,927 Paula, 177 00:07:14,929 --> 00:07:15,961 I'm okay here by myself. 178 00:07:15,963 --> 00:07:17,396 I mean, I got doctors and nurses, 179 00:07:17,398 --> 00:07:18,564 - and Denise. - (door opens) 180 00:07:18,566 --> 00:07:21,649 Denise, I will strangle you in your sleep! 181 00:07:23,102 --> 00:07:24,268 (door closes) 182 00:07:25,251 --> 00:07:26,672 Unbelievable. 183 00:07:26,674 --> 00:07:27,907 (sighs) 184 00:07:27,909 --> 00:07:31,343 Honey, do not worry about me. 185 00:07:31,345 --> 00:07:33,071 (sighs) 186 00:07:33,096 --> 00:07:36,949 I am where I should be, which is right by your side. 187 00:07:36,951 --> 00:07:38,350 How's your throat feeling? 188 00:07:38,352 --> 00:07:41,454 Still a little scratchy from the stomach pump and the barfing. 189 00:07:41,689 --> 00:07:44,690 Ugh, it was like all six months of my college bulimia 190 00:07:44,692 --> 00:07:45,858 happened in one day. 191 00:07:45,860 --> 00:07:47,407 That was sassy. 192 00:07:47,595 --> 00:07:50,830 Sassy... my girl is still sassy. 193 00:07:50,832 --> 00:07:53,032 Mama, what's gonna happen when I get out of here? 194 00:07:53,034 --> 00:07:54,924 Tell you what, let's not worry about that right now. 195 00:07:55,937 --> 00:07:59,238 Because you are doing everything you're supposed to. 196 00:07:59,263 --> 00:08:01,072 You met with a doctor, 197 00:08:01,097 --> 00:08:03,924 that... very nice-looking Dr. Shin, 198 00:08:03,949 --> 00:08:06,016 or, as I like to call him, Dr. Dan. 199 00:08:06,114 --> 00:08:09,263 Or, even better, Dr. Damn... 200 00:08:09,288 --> 00:08:12,083 - because he is so cute. - Hmm. 201 00:08:12,108 --> 00:08:14,161 You were honest and brave. 202 00:08:14,186 --> 00:08:16,756 And they said that in a couple of days, 203 00:08:16,758 --> 00:08:18,005 you can go home. 204 00:08:18,030 --> 00:08:19,740 But that's what I'm nervous about. 205 00:08:20,546 --> 00:08:22,317 Once I go home... 206 00:08:23,118 --> 00:08:24,551 how will things be different? 207 00:08:24,732 --> 00:08:29,769 I... will not let you leave here without a plan. 208 00:08:29,771 --> 00:08:31,704 Okay. 209 00:08:31,706 --> 00:08:34,774 ♪ ♪ 210 00:08:37,174 --> 00:08:40,496 VALENCIA: Hey, all. Thank you so much for all your comments. 211 00:08:40,521 --> 00:08:43,482 Rebecca feels so encouraged and she's making a lot of progress. 212 00:08:43,484 --> 00:08:45,317 I've read a lot of your comments to her 213 00:08:45,319 --> 00:08:46,552 and they really cheer her up. 214 00:08:46,809 --> 00:08:48,988 Now, get your liking fingers ready, 215 00:08:48,990 --> 00:08:52,491 because Rebecca is going home today. 216 00:08:52,493 --> 00:08:54,768 Yeah, she's talking to the doctor, like, right now. 217 00:08:54,793 --> 00:08:57,012 One sec, guys, BRB. 218 00:08:57,298 --> 00:08:59,865 You ruin a shot again and I will put you in ICU. 219 00:08:59,867 --> 00:09:01,033 HEATHER: He's just trying to go 220 00:09:01,035 --> 00:09:02,835 to the bathroom, and it's right behind you. 221 00:09:02,837 --> 00:09:04,937 No, no, it-it's fine. I can get out of the shot. 222 00:09:04,939 --> 00:09:07,200 I'll just crawl on the floor. I'm sure they mop it frequently. 223 00:09:07,225 --> 00:09:08,874 Are you done talking? 224 00:09:08,876 --> 00:09:09,875 Rebecca's friends are waiting 225 00:09:09,877 --> 00:09:11,210 for their daily dose of inspiration. 226 00:09:11,212 --> 00:09:12,344 And they're gonna think something is wrong 227 00:09:12,346 --> 00:09:14,317 or maybe feel upset, I don't know. 228 00:09:14,649 --> 00:09:16,731 (exhales) 229 00:09:17,138 --> 00:09:22,508 Like I was saying, our little Becky Girl is going home. 230 00:09:22,557 --> 00:09:24,023 Yay. 231 00:09:24,025 --> 00:09:25,658 You okay? 232 00:09:25,937 --> 00:09:27,780 Need me to wipe anything? 233 00:09:27,805 --> 00:09:30,288 REBECCA: Uh, no, it was weird last time when you did that. 234 00:09:30,313 --> 00:09:33,566 Yeah, I shouldn't have looked you right in the eyes. Copy that. 235 00:09:33,763 --> 00:09:35,483 Paula? 236 00:09:36,037 --> 00:09:37,870 I know exactly what's gonna happen today. 237 00:09:37,872 --> 00:09:39,865 Dr. Shin, he's gonna prescribe me a bunch of meds, 238 00:09:39,890 --> 00:09:42,074 like doctors always do, and they're not gonna work, 239 00:09:42,076 --> 00:09:43,576 and I'm gonna end up back here. 240 00:09:43,578 --> 00:09:44,910 Wait, wait, wait. 241 00:09:44,912 --> 00:09:46,545 Let's give the guy a chance. 242 00:09:46,547 --> 00:09:49,267 Remember? Dr. Damn... is good people. 243 00:09:49,292 --> 00:09:51,517 Dr. Damn... it's funny that you call him that. 244 00:09:51,519 --> 00:09:53,586 These are the moments when I used to laugh. 245 00:09:53,963 --> 00:09:55,888 So, ha, ha, ha, ha. 246 00:09:56,259 --> 00:09:57,723 Hello, Rebecca. 247 00:09:57,725 --> 00:10:01,160 How we feeling today? “We,” sorry, that's lame doctor-talk. 248 00:10:01,162 --> 00:10:02,695 How are you feeling today? 249 00:10:02,697 --> 00:10:04,530 Um, I, um, all right. 250 00:10:04,532 --> 00:10:06,966 PAULA: So, you're springing our girl today. 251 00:10:06,968 --> 00:10:08,968 I can't wait to get her back home with me. 252 00:10:08,970 --> 00:10:10,035 You two live together? 253 00:10:10,037 --> 00:10:11,804 Oh, no, no, no. No, I live with my husband 254 00:10:11,806 --> 00:10:13,706 and kids, but you know, my focus is Rebecca 255 00:10:13,708 --> 00:10:15,608 right now, so I will be 256 00:10:15,610 --> 00:10:18,844 driving her and staying with her and sleeping in her bed. 257 00:10:18,846 --> 00:10:20,499 - In her bed? - Yes. 258 00:10:20,524 --> 00:10:22,715 Oh, I'm sorry, have you never had a best friend before? 259 00:10:22,717 --> 00:10:24,350 Because you should talk to someone about that. 260 00:10:24,352 --> 00:10:27,519 REBECCA: O-Okay, so, um, all right, Doc, tell me what to do. 261 00:10:27,521 --> 00:10:29,989 Um, first question, how many meds am I gonna be on? 262 00:10:29,991 --> 00:10:31,924 Uh, can you give me the daytime version of whatever it is? 263 00:10:31,926 --> 00:10:34,126 Because all of the other meds I've been prescribed 264 00:10:34,128 --> 00:10:36,110 have made me numb or drowsy or... 265 00:10:36,135 --> 00:10:39,837 Actually, your treatment protocol is not centered on medication. 266 00:10:39,862 --> 00:10:42,234 - Wait, what? - Yeah, how is she supposed 267 00:10:42,236 --> 00:10:43,569 to get better with no medicine? 268 00:10:43,571 --> 00:10:46,472 Oh, there may be some, but it's not the main focus. 269 00:10:46,474 --> 00:10:50,910 Rebecca, in my opinion, you've been misdiagnosed over the years. 270 00:10:50,912 --> 00:10:53,875 It's one of the main reasons you've been struggling. 271 00:10:53,900 --> 00:10:57,101 I think, with the right diagnosis and treatment, 272 00:10:57,585 --> 00:10:58,884 you can get a lot better. 273 00:10:59,336 --> 00:11:01,587 Wait, so you have a new diagnosis for me? 274 00:11:01,589 --> 00:11:03,689 So I'm not anxious or OCD 275 00:11:03,691 --> 00:11:05,090 or depressed or any of the vague combo of things 276 00:11:05,092 --> 00:11:06,258 people have told me I am? 277 00:11:06,260 --> 00:11:08,761 - Oh-oh, my God. What am I? - Great questions, 278 00:11:08,763 --> 00:11:10,396 but I don't want to get ahead of treatment. 279 00:11:10,398 --> 00:11:12,423 Okay? We're gonna talk about all that 280 00:11:12,448 --> 00:11:15,267 and the steps towards your recovery later today at the clinic. 281 00:11:15,269 --> 00:11:17,069 Wow, this is huge. 282 00:11:17,071 --> 00:11:19,405 - I'll see you then, okay? - Okay. 283 00:11:19,407 --> 00:11:21,064 Bye. 284 00:11:21,242 --> 00:11:24,109 Paula, did you hear what he said? 285 00:11:24,111 --> 00:11:26,879 I have a new diagnosis. A new one. 286 00:11:26,881 --> 00:11:28,147 ♪ ♪ 287 00:11:28,149 --> 00:11:29,648 He just opened up 288 00:11:29,650 --> 00:11:33,152 a whole new future of possibilities for me. 289 00:11:33,154 --> 00:11:35,654 A new path for my life. 290 00:11:38,659 --> 00:11:41,894 ♪ For almost 30 years, I've known something was wrong ♪ 291 00:11:41,896 --> 00:11:43,762 ♪ But Mom said weakness causes bloating ♪ 292 00:11:43,764 --> 00:11:45,631 ♪ So I tried to be strong ♪ 293 00:11:45,633 --> 00:11:47,199 ♪ Fake it till you make it ♪ 294 00:11:47,201 --> 00:11:50,882 ♪ That's how I got by ♪ 295 00:11:51,672 --> 00:11:53,572 ♪ And when I tried to find the reason ♪ 296 00:11:53,574 --> 00:11:55,407 ♪ For my sadness and terror ♪ 297 00:11:55,409 --> 00:11:58,744 ♪ All the solutions were trial and error ♪ 298 00:11:58,746 --> 00:12:00,746 ♪ Take this pill, say this chant ♪ 299 00:12:00,748 --> 00:12:04,650 ♪ Move here for this guy ♪ 300 00:12:04,652 --> 00:12:08,420 ♪ But now, there's no need for regret ♪ 301 00:12:08,422 --> 00:12:10,689 ♪ 'Cause I'm about to get ♪ 302 00:12:10,691 --> 00:12:14,159 ♪ A diagnosis ♪ 303 00:12:14,161 --> 00:12:17,429 ♪ A diagnosis ♪ 304 00:12:17,431 --> 00:12:23,736 ♪ Don't tell me, “No, sister, you don't fit in” ♪ 305 00:12:24,805 --> 00:12:28,340 ♪ Doc, prescribe me my tribe, give me my throng ♪ 306 00:12:28,342 --> 00:12:31,377 ♪ Tell me that this whole time I've belonged ♪ 307 00:12:31,379 --> 00:12:34,213 ♪ With those other people who share ♪ 308 00:12:34,215 --> 00:12:38,150 ♪ My diagnosis ♪ 309 00:12:38,152 --> 00:12:41,286 ♪ What could it be? What could be right? ♪ 310 00:12:41,288 --> 00:12:44,790 ♪ Schizophrenic or bipolar lite? ♪ 311 00:12:44,792 --> 00:12:46,291 ♪ I've never heard voices ♪ 312 00:12:46,293 --> 00:12:48,727 ♪ But maybe it's time to start... ♪ 313 00:12:48,729 --> 00:12:50,562 VOICES: You're super cool, Rebecca. 314 00:12:50,564 --> 00:12:51,630 Thanks. 315 00:12:51,632 --> 00:12:52,998 ♪ Obsessives with numbers ♪ 316 00:12:53,000 --> 00:12:55,134 ♪ Hoarders with cats ♪ 317 00:12:55,136 --> 00:12:57,970 ♪ I could really rock a tinfoil hat ♪ 318 00:12:57,972 --> 00:13:01,407 ♪ Perfect they're not, but at least they know ♪ 319 00:13:01,409 --> 00:13:03,609 ♪ Who they are ♪ 320 00:13:03,611 --> 00:13:04,743 - (gasps) - _ 321 00:13:04,745 --> 00:13:08,013 ♪ No more bad pills, fads or tricks ♪ 322 00:13:08,015 --> 00:13:11,850 ♪ Who says there isn't an easy fix ♪ 323 00:13:11,852 --> 00:13:15,087 ♪ With a diagnosis ♪ 324 00:13:15,089 --> 00:13:19,291 ♪ I'm ready to blow this ♪ 325 00:13:19,293 --> 00:13:23,429 ♪ Joint, and by joint, I mean my inner sense of confusion ♪ 326 00:13:23,431 --> 00:13:25,597 - VOICES: ♪ You said that confusingly ♪ - Shh. 327 00:13:25,599 --> 00:13:28,801 ♪ I'm aware mental illness is stigmatized ♪ 328 00:13:28,803 --> 00:13:32,471 ♪ But the stigma is worth it if I've realized ♪ 329 00:13:32,473 --> 00:13:34,706 ♪ Who I'm meant to be ♪ 330 00:13:34,708 --> 00:13:39,178 ♪ Armed with my diagnosis ♪ 331 00:13:39,180 --> 00:13:41,013 ♪ Oh, the doctors that I've met ♪ 332 00:13:41,015 --> 00:13:44,983 ♪ Who didn't get me ♪ 333 00:13:44,985 --> 00:13:47,286 ♪ This one naturopath ♪ 334 00:13:47,288 --> 00:13:51,924 ♪ Used feathers to pet me ♪ 335 00:13:51,926 --> 00:13:54,960 ♪ They said anxiety, insomnia were my affliction ♪ 336 00:13:54,962 --> 00:13:58,730 ♪ The naturopath said it was sex addiction ♪ 337 00:13:58,732 --> 00:14:02,167 ♪ But all those things I knew I wasn't ♪ 338 00:14:02,169 --> 00:14:06,505 ♪ Yes, I like penises, but who doesn't? ♪ 339 00:14:06,507 --> 00:14:10,509 ♪ So put me in a bottle, slap a label on ♪ 340 00:14:10,511 --> 00:14:13,479 ♪ List out the side effects, then worries begone ♪ 341 00:14:13,481 --> 00:14:16,915 ♪ 'Cause finally, I'll know this ♪ 342 00:14:16,917 --> 00:14:21,453 ♪ My diagnosis! ♪ 343 00:14:21,455 --> 00:14:24,007 - (exhales) - Welcome to your therapy, Rebecca. 344 00:14:28,679 --> 00:14:30,398 _ 345 00:14:30,422 --> 00:14:31,906 Okay. Diagnosis time. Hit me. 346 00:14:31,930 --> 00:14:34,724 Okay. Now, it's important to keep in mind 347 00:14:34,749 --> 00:14:37,483 that nobody's diagnosis is simple or covers everything. 348 00:14:37,508 --> 00:14:39,175 - Yep, yep, yep, yep. - It's also important 349 00:14:39,177 --> 00:14:41,771 to not look up the diagnosis online 350 00:14:41,796 --> 00:14:43,612 before we have a chance to get into it, okay? 351 00:14:43,614 --> 00:14:45,233 Got it. I will not look up anything, 352 00:14:45,258 --> 00:14:46,791 if you don't want me to. I'm a good student. 353 00:14:46,793 --> 00:14:48,960 I will stick to the required reading, sir. 354 00:14:48,962 --> 00:14:52,563 Rebecca, I am noticing how energetic you are. 355 00:14:52,565 --> 00:14:55,233 That's not uncommon after a suicidal event. 356 00:14:55,729 --> 00:14:58,569 Too energetic. Sorry. Sorry, um, sorry. 357 00:14:58,571 --> 00:15:01,606 I'm-I'm calm now, this is my calm, low voice. 358 00:15:01,631 --> 00:15:03,441 Okay, so, 359 00:15:03,443 --> 00:15:06,277 based on my conversation with Dr. Akopian 360 00:15:06,279 --> 00:15:08,646 and our meetings at the hospital, 361 00:15:08,648 --> 00:15:12,517 it is my belief that, while you do have some symptoms 362 00:15:12,519 --> 00:15:15,353 of anxiety, depression, OCD 363 00:15:15,355 --> 00:15:16,687 and possibly PTSD... 364 00:15:16,689 --> 00:15:17,922 Right. But I've heard all those things before, 365 00:15:17,924 --> 00:15:20,158 - and you said this was a new thing. - I'm still talking. 366 00:15:20,160 --> 00:15:21,893 - Sorry. - It is my opinion 367 00:15:21,895 --> 00:15:24,195 that you exhibit many of the characteristics 368 00:15:24,197 --> 00:15:27,265 of borderline personality disorder. 369 00:15:28,139 --> 00:15:31,084 Wow. O-Okay, um... 370 00:15:31,383 --> 00:15:34,184 First question... what is that? 371 00:15:34,374 --> 00:15:38,037 Well, a person with BPD is essentially someone 372 00:15:38,062 --> 00:15:41,012 who has difficulty regulating their emotions. 373 00:15:41,014 --> 00:15:45,416 Someone that lacks the protective emotional skin 374 00:15:45,418 --> 00:15:47,552 to feel comfortable in the world. 375 00:15:47,554 --> 00:15:49,140 Wow. 376 00:15:49,483 --> 00:15:51,759 Um, just a couple questions, um... 377 00:15:51,784 --> 00:15:53,825 How did I get BPD? Is BPD curable? 378 00:15:53,827 --> 00:15:55,827 How serious is BPD? Is BPD easy to fix? 379 00:15:55,829 --> 00:15:57,795 Is BPD genetic? Did I get the BPD from my mother? 380 00:15:57,797 --> 00:15:59,630 I got it from my mother, right? Again, just, like, rapid fire. 381 00:15:59,632 --> 00:16:01,632 Just, like, answer. Don't think about it. 382 00:16:01,634 --> 00:16:03,434 Okay, I never fall for “rapid fire.” 383 00:16:03,436 --> 00:16:06,771 Rebecca, I know you have a lot of questions. I understand. 384 00:16:06,773 --> 00:16:08,840 And we'll talk about it a lot more, luckily, 385 00:16:08,842 --> 00:16:11,108 in your group therapy, which is where we're headed right now. 386 00:16:11,110 --> 00:16:13,077 So you're just gonna pull a Yoda and not tell me anything 387 00:16:13,079 --> 00:16:15,279 I want to know before I'm ready to know it, yeah? 388 00:16:15,281 --> 00:16:16,424 That's what this is? 389 00:16:16,950 --> 00:16:19,650 Hot-ass doctor, telling me not to look things up online. 390 00:16:19,652 --> 00:16:21,152 Oh, I'm gonna look things up online, 391 00:16:21,154 --> 00:16:22,787 hot-ass doctor. All right. 392 00:16:22,789 --> 00:16:26,591 “What is borderline personality disorder?” 393 00:16:26,593 --> 00:16:28,793 (exhales) 394 00:16:30,174 --> 00:16:32,174 _ 395 00:16:32,199 --> 00:16:34,199 _ 396 00:16:34,224 --> 00:16:35,858 _ 397 00:16:35,882 --> 00:16:37,592 _ 398 00:16:37,617 --> 00:16:39,617 _ 399 00:16:39,641 --> 00:16:41,641 _ 400 00:16:41,741 --> 00:16:43,007 Nope. 401 00:16:43,009 --> 00:16:45,343 No. No, no, no. No. 402 00:16:45,345 --> 00:16:46,644 So, guys. 403 00:16:46,646 --> 00:16:47,745 Guys, guys, guys. 404 00:16:47,747 --> 00:16:49,780 Day five, part two. 405 00:16:49,782 --> 00:16:52,116 Rebecca is at the outpatient center 406 00:16:52,118 --> 00:16:53,751 getting wonderful treatment. 407 00:16:53,753 --> 00:16:55,553 And meanwhile, back at the ranch, 408 00:16:55,555 --> 00:16:59,156 we've stocked up on all of her favorite... comfort carbs. 409 00:16:59,158 --> 00:17:01,459 My girl loves her sugar, salt and dough. 410 00:17:01,461 --> 00:17:03,828 Now, all of you supporters out there, 411 00:17:03,830 --> 00:17:06,063 Rebecca's big #Bunchafriends, 412 00:17:06,065 --> 00:17:08,799 I want you to know that her heart is strong, 413 00:17:08,801 --> 00:17:10,501 her spirit is bright, and she... 414 00:17:10,503 --> 00:17:11,836 Did you tell all your bots 415 00:17:11,838 --> 00:17:13,871 that we had to take all the knives out of the house? 416 00:17:13,873 --> 00:17:15,406 Also, maybe ask them if they know 417 00:17:15,408 --> 00:17:18,075 how to jailbreak an avocado, because I do not. 418 00:17:18,077 --> 00:17:19,176 Heather, we're live. 419 00:17:19,178 --> 00:17:20,444 - Okay. - (door opens) 420 00:17:20,446 --> 00:17:21,545 Oh, my God, guys, she's here. 421 00:17:21,547 --> 00:17:23,681 Guys, guys, guys, let's see how it went. 422 00:17:23,683 --> 00:17:26,284 (door closes) 423 00:17:26,286 --> 00:17:30,154 - Okay, let's put that away. - (phone beeps) 424 00:17:30,156 --> 00:17:34,525 REBECCA: So, um, I got the worst diagnosis ever, basically, um... 425 00:17:34,527 --> 00:17:35,826 Yeah, I really hate it. 426 00:17:35,828 --> 00:17:38,529 It's, uh, called borderline personality disorder, 427 00:17:38,531 --> 00:17:40,765 and I read two and a half sentences about it, 428 00:17:40,767 --> 00:17:42,300 and they were the worst sentences ever, 429 00:17:42,302 --> 00:17:44,068 and I don't want to know any more. 430 00:17:44,070 --> 00:17:46,581 (crying): And it's all just awful. 431 00:17:46,606 --> 00:17:48,506 (phone beeps) 432 00:17:48,508 --> 00:17:49,907 (mouthing) 433 00:17:49,909 --> 00:17:51,809 Oh, my God. Stop. 434 00:17:52,612 --> 00:17:56,013 “Wishing you the best 435 00:17:56,015 --> 00:17:59,517 “after your suicide attempt. 436 00:17:59,519 --> 00:18:03,287 “Yours, Nathaniel J. Plimpton III, 437 00:18:03,289 --> 00:18:05,022 Esquire.” 438 00:18:07,961 --> 00:18:09,446 Yeah. 439 00:18:17,570 --> 00:18:19,603 (exhales) 440 00:18:19,605 --> 00:18:21,806 (panting) 441 00:18:29,415 --> 00:18:31,382 - (groans) - What's up, boss? 442 00:18:31,384 --> 00:18:32,984 Uh, nothing. 443 00:18:32,986 --> 00:18:36,732 Uh, just had a little weird déjà vu moment. 444 00:18:37,090 --> 00:18:38,589 So glad you called me in... 445 00:18:38,591 --> 00:18:41,092 - I did no such thing. - ... because we are planning 446 00:18:41,094 --> 00:18:43,160 to visit Rebecca at home this weekend. 447 00:18:43,162 --> 00:18:46,263 I'm kind of nervous, 'cause I'm terrible with death. 448 00:18:46,265 --> 00:18:47,765 When I was a kid, my dog died. 449 00:18:47,767 --> 00:18:52,343 - I was the one who found him, - all, like, splayed out, 450 00:18:52,952 --> 00:18:55,906 eyes rolled into the back of his head, 451 00:18:55,908 --> 00:18:57,475 his tongue hanging out. 452 00:18:57,477 --> 00:18:58,809 It's, like, burned into my brain... 453 00:18:58,811 --> 00:18:59,944 Stop it! 454 00:18:59,946 --> 00:19:01,679 Oh. 455 00:19:01,681 --> 00:19:03,014 I'm sorry. 456 00:19:03,016 --> 00:19:04,682 Don't worry about me. 457 00:19:04,684 --> 00:19:07,518 I'm a cat guy now. I have a cat named Andromeda... 458 00:19:07,520 --> 00:19:09,053 I got to go. 459 00:19:09,055 --> 00:19:10,287 Are... you... 460 00:19:10,289 --> 00:19:11,555 Just get out of my office. 461 00:19:11,557 --> 00:19:13,057 Okay, well. 462 00:19:14,228 --> 00:19:17,628 So you didn't go to group therapy, you just blew it off? 463 00:19:17,630 --> 00:19:18,863 No, I didn't go. 464 00:19:18,865 --> 00:19:20,587 I was too upset. 465 00:19:20,967 --> 00:19:24,635 I mean, I don't have an illness, I have a personality disorder. 466 00:19:24,892 --> 00:19:28,305 It's not something I have, it's something I am. 467 00:19:28,307 --> 00:19:30,908 This is what I've feared my whole life. I'm broken. 468 00:19:30,910 --> 00:19:34,311 Honey, what did I say to you over and over in the car? 469 00:19:34,313 --> 00:19:35,479 You are not broken. 470 00:19:35,481 --> 00:19:36,714 You're wonderful. 471 00:19:36,716 --> 00:19:37,882 VALENCIA: She's right. 472 00:19:37,884 --> 00:19:40,251 You are an inspiration to hundreds of people. 473 00:19:40,253 --> 00:19:42,720 There is a Facebook group in Venezuela 474 00:19:42,722 --> 00:19:44,755 that's completely devoted to you. 475 00:19:44,757 --> 00:19:47,324 It's called El Buncho Valiente. 476 00:19:47,326 --> 00:19:49,393 Oh, my God, seriously, stop. 477 00:19:49,395 --> 00:19:52,263 Okay, listen, Rebecca, if you hate this diagnosis so much, 478 00:19:52,265 --> 00:19:55,132 then, let's get a second opinion. 479 00:19:55,398 --> 00:19:57,268 Second opinions are very common. 480 00:19:57,270 --> 00:19:59,070 And, you know, this new doctor, 481 00:19:59,072 --> 00:20:00,805 he just met you. 482 00:20:00,807 --> 00:20:02,406 He doesn't know you yet. 483 00:20:02,408 --> 00:20:04,275 And who says we just have to sit here 484 00:20:04,277 --> 00:20:07,311 and accept his diagnosis with a capital “D”? 485 00:20:07,313 --> 00:20:09,547 We don't have to just take his “D.” 486 00:20:09,549 --> 00:20:11,015 Who says his “D" is so great? 487 00:20:11,017 --> 00:20:12,550 No, you're right. He should get to know me better 488 00:20:12,552 --> 00:20:14,318 before he shoves his “D” down my throat. 489 00:20:14,320 --> 00:20:15,553 Yeah. What we should do, 490 00:20:15,555 --> 00:20:17,254 is get another “D.” 491 00:20:17,256 --> 00:20:19,323 And then we'll have two Ds. 492 00:20:19,325 --> 00:20:20,758 You know, one here, and one there, 493 00:20:20,760 --> 00:20:22,059 and we'll just... 494 00:20:22,061 --> 00:20:25,929 - figure out which “D” you like better. - Okay, let's calm down. 495 00:20:25,954 --> 00:20:29,233 Rebecca, we can ask Dr. Akopian. 496 00:20:29,235 --> 00:20:32,236 Oh, my God, Paula, you're totally right. 497 00:20:32,238 --> 00:20:33,871 I mean, she knows me way better than Dr. Shin, 498 00:20:33,873 --> 00:20:36,807 and she never said anything about a personality disorder. 499 00:20:36,809 --> 00:20:38,509 I mean, she likes me a lot. 500 00:20:38,511 --> 00:20:41,779 I-I thought Dr. Akopian consulted with Dr. Damn 501 00:20:41,781 --> 00:20:43,581 on your diagnosis? 502 00:20:43,583 --> 00:20:45,850 She may have, but... no. 503 00:20:45,852 --> 00:20:48,152 I-If she knew how much I hated this diagnosis, 504 00:20:48,154 --> 00:20:50,254 and how upset it was making me, she'd be pissed. 505 00:20:50,256 --> 00:20:52,223 I mean, Dr. Akopian only wants me to be happy, 506 00:20:52,225 --> 00:20:54,204 and this is not what happy feels like. 507 00:20:54,229 --> 00:20:56,594 All right. Let's go. I'll drive. 508 00:20:56,596 --> 00:20:58,462 Okay. 509 00:20:58,464 --> 00:21:00,564 I do recommend an appointment. 510 00:21:00,566 --> 00:21:02,867 Maybe don't crawl through her doggie door. 511 00:21:02,869 --> 00:21:07,037 Hmm. How do I spin this for the worldwide audience? 512 00:21:07,039 --> 00:21:08,305 - (door closes) - (phone beeps) 513 00:21:08,307 --> 00:21:09,440 Oh... 514 00:21:09,442 --> 00:21:11,642 (piano playing softly) 515 00:21:12,378 --> 00:21:14,245 - (knocking on door) - (door opens) 516 00:21:14,247 --> 00:21:15,579 Father. Mother. 517 00:21:15,581 --> 00:21:17,248 Nathaniel, martini time cannot be interrupted. 518 00:21:17,250 --> 00:21:18,649 The timing is crucial. 519 00:21:18,651 --> 00:21:19,950 That skin of ice on the top, 520 00:21:19,952 --> 00:21:21,352 it melts in seconds. Melts. I know, I know. 521 00:21:21,354 --> 00:21:23,187 Oh, it's okay, darling. He came all this way. 522 00:21:23,189 --> 00:21:24,388 What is it, Nathaniel? 523 00:21:24,390 --> 00:21:25,744 W-Would you like a martini? 524 00:21:25,769 --> 00:21:29,426 - No, no. I need answers. - I don't like your tone. 525 00:21:29,744 --> 00:21:31,061 Mom. 526 00:21:31,455 --> 00:21:33,898 When I was ten, did you try to kill yourself? 527 00:21:34,507 --> 00:21:36,340 Not now, Bernice! 528 00:21:37,547 --> 00:21:38,880 Did you? 529 00:21:45,643 --> 00:21:47,677 NATHANIEL: I have this... memory. 530 00:21:47,679 --> 00:21:50,012 I was ten years old, and I heard something fall over. 531 00:21:50,014 --> 00:21:52,315 And I went to your room, and I saw you, 532 00:21:52,317 --> 00:21:55,528 Mom, passed out on the floor. And your eyes 533 00:21:55,553 --> 00:21:58,321 were rolling back in your head. And I tried to wake you up... 534 00:21:58,323 --> 00:21:59,422 Nathaniel, enough. 535 00:21:59,424 --> 00:22:00,823 And Dad told me to go to my room, and I did. 536 00:22:00,825 --> 00:22:03,359 And then the next thing I know, you were gone 537 00:22:03,361 --> 00:22:05,094 for, like, a month. And everyone said, 538 00:22:05,096 --> 00:22:06,763 “Don't talk about it. Don't ask questions.” 539 00:22:06,765 --> 00:22:08,097 So I didn't. 540 00:22:08,787 --> 00:22:10,733 But now I really need to know what happened. 541 00:22:10,735 --> 00:22:12,268 You know what happened. 542 00:22:12,270 --> 00:22:14,470 Your mother had the flu and got dehydrated, 543 00:22:14,472 --> 00:22:16,229 so she went sailing for a month 544 00:22:16,254 --> 00:22:19,041 - with your Aunt Sissy in Rhode Island. - That's right. 545 00:22:19,043 --> 00:22:21,377 I brought you back that anchor key chain, remember? 546 00:22:21,379 --> 00:22:23,731 It wasn't the flu. Come on. 547 00:22:23,756 --> 00:22:25,989 There were sleeping pills. There was a bottle 548 00:22:26,014 --> 00:22:28,418 of pills on your nightstand, and you wouldn't wake up. 549 00:22:28,420 --> 00:22:30,653 We told you what happened. This conversation is over. 550 00:22:30,655 --> 00:22:32,287 It's not over. 551 00:22:33,224 --> 00:22:35,992 Look, I need to know the truth. 552 00:22:35,994 --> 00:22:37,660 My friend just tried to kill herself, 553 00:22:37,662 --> 00:22:39,228 and I can't reach out to her at all, 554 00:22:39,230 --> 00:22:41,197 because every time I think about her, 555 00:22:41,199 --> 00:22:43,900 I picture this... lifeless body. 556 00:22:43,925 --> 00:22:45,752 And it makes me think of you that night. 557 00:22:45,777 --> 00:22:48,908 And I get panicked and I can't breathe. 558 00:22:48,933 --> 00:22:50,500 And I don't know what that is. 559 00:22:50,502 --> 00:22:53,136 And, I'm sorry, also, who goes sailing for a month 560 00:22:53,138 --> 00:22:54,804 when they have the flu? That's not a thing. 561 00:22:54,806 --> 00:22:56,105 That's a terrible lie. 562 00:22:56,107 --> 00:22:59,842 - Please tell me the truth. - Nathaniel, stop this now. 563 00:22:59,844 --> 00:23:01,778 This isn't how we raised you. 564 00:23:02,958 --> 00:23:04,539 Mom? 565 00:23:07,578 --> 00:23:08,951 Please. 566 00:23:09,484 --> 00:23:12,588 Oh, Nathaniel, I hate to see you so upset. 567 00:23:12,804 --> 00:23:16,659 But it's-it's just so unpleasant to dredge up the past. 568 00:23:16,661 --> 00:23:18,428 (clears throat) Now, 569 00:23:18,430 --> 00:23:20,096 why don't you join us for dinner. 570 00:23:20,098 --> 00:23:21,431 We're having lamb tonight. 571 00:23:21,433 --> 00:23:23,499 And-and then you can come out and see my roses. 572 00:23:23,501 --> 00:23:24,467 They're looking 573 00:23:24,469 --> 00:23:25,501 so healthy... 574 00:23:25,503 --> 00:23:26,869 Will you please just answer me?! 575 00:23:30,108 --> 00:23:31,607 (sighs) 576 00:23:31,609 --> 00:23:34,944 (exhales) I think I'd better go lie down. 577 00:23:34,946 --> 00:23:37,246 I suddenly have a terrible headache. 578 00:23:38,068 --> 00:23:39,958 Mom, I'm sorry. I... 579 00:23:42,716 --> 00:23:43,989 You upset her. 580 00:23:44,716 --> 00:23:45,822 Something's happened to you 581 00:23:45,824 --> 00:23:48,024 since you started working in that new office. 582 00:23:48,026 --> 00:23:49,759 You're getting peppery, 583 00:23:49,761 --> 00:23:51,894 and I don't use that word lightly. 584 00:23:51,896 --> 00:23:55,062 Now, congratulations, you've ruined our evening. 585 00:23:55,087 --> 00:23:57,366 And we were having lamb. 586 00:23:57,368 --> 00:23:58,952 Get out of my house. 587 00:24:02,273 --> 00:24:05,708 VALENCIA: So, guys, I want to send a special thank you 588 00:24:05,710 --> 00:24:07,643 to Shimmer Glimmer Cosmetics for sending over 589 00:24:07,645 --> 00:24:10,747 those amazing and gorgeous lip glosses to Rebecca. 590 00:24:10,749 --> 00:24:14,650 I'm wearing one right now, and she is going to love them. 591 00:24:14,652 --> 00:24:15,952 There's nothing wrong with a little pampering 592 00:24:15,954 --> 00:24:17,820 in a tough time... Just plain ol' self-care. 593 00:24:17,822 --> 00:24:19,622 And, remember, if you don't like the shade, 594 00:24:19,624 --> 00:24:21,157 Shimmer Glimmer will send you a different one 595 00:24:21,159 --> 00:24:22,658 - for free... Wait. Okay. - No, that's enough. I've had it. 596 00:24:22,660 --> 00:24:25,084 - Wait, no! (grunts) - I've had it. I'm going to murder you. 597 00:24:25,109 --> 00:24:27,196 What is wrong with you? 598 00:24:27,198 --> 00:24:30,299 You're using your friend's crisis to get swag? 599 00:24:30,770 --> 00:24:33,669 I mean, not to judge, V, like, at all, 600 00:24:33,671 --> 00:24:36,639 but what you're doing is pathetic and vain and stupid 601 00:24:36,641 --> 00:24:39,245 and cringey and trendy and selfish and basic. 602 00:24:39,270 --> 00:24:41,711 (gasps) Oh, my God. Wait, hold up. 603 00:24:41,713 --> 00:24:43,346 You think this is about me? 604 00:24:43,348 --> 00:24:45,948 - Yes. - Are you blind? 605 00:24:45,950 --> 00:24:49,652 This has way transcended any one person. 606 00:24:49,654 --> 00:24:52,155 Rebecca's story and her courage 607 00:24:52,157 --> 00:24:54,257 and my courage sharing her courage 608 00:24:54,259 --> 00:24:56,359 is inspiring an entire movement. 609 00:24:56,600 --> 00:24:58,427 And that's what people want to feel... 610 00:24:58,429 --> 00:25:00,763 Inspired, not sad. 611 00:25:00,765 --> 00:25:02,365 And that is what I give them... 612 00:25:02,367 --> 00:25:04,233 Hope and joy 613 00:25:04,235 --> 00:25:06,469 and, yes, makeup tips and gorgeous hair. 614 00:25:06,471 --> 00:25:07,804 Oh, my God, you're so full of it. 615 00:25:07,806 --> 00:25:09,972 You're, like, so full of crap. 616 00:25:09,974 --> 00:25:11,741 No, I'm not. 617 00:25:11,743 --> 00:25:13,676 I'm full of something else. 618 00:25:13,678 --> 00:25:15,773 ♪ ♪ 619 00:25:29,360 --> 00:25:32,128 ♪ There's a rumbling within me ♪ 620 00:25:32,130 --> 00:25:34,630 ♪ Something I just can't ignore ♪ 621 00:25:34,632 --> 00:25:37,600 ♪ I thought I could contain it ♪ 622 00:25:37,602 --> 00:25:40,870 ♪ I can't hold it in anymore ♪ 623 00:25:40,872 --> 00:25:43,539 ♪ It started as just a trickle ♪ 624 00:25:43,541 --> 00:25:46,042 ♪ Loose and undefined ♪ 625 00:25:46,044 --> 00:25:48,644 ♪ Now it's starting to solidify ♪ 626 00:25:48,646 --> 00:25:53,416 ♪ Into something we can all get behind ♪ 627 00:25:53,418 --> 00:25:56,385 ♪ This is my movement ♪ 628 00:25:56,387 --> 00:25:59,722 ♪ Can't stop this movement ♪ 629 00:25:59,724 --> 00:26:02,391 ♪ It's coming out fast in a powerful blast ♪ 630 00:26:02,393 --> 00:26:04,227 ♪ From deep inside of me ♪ 631 00:26:04,229 --> 00:26:06,996 ♪ Like an explosion ♪ 632 00:26:06,998 --> 00:26:09,966 ♪ Of built-up emotion ♪ 633 00:26:09,968 --> 00:26:12,101 ♪ Oh, I wanna scream and shout ♪ 634 00:26:12,103 --> 00:26:13,302 ♪ I got to let it out ♪ 635 00:26:13,304 --> 00:26:17,907 ♪ 'Cause this movement is bigger than me ♪ 636 00:26:17,909 --> 00:26:21,377 ♪ My movement's getting stronger ♪ 637 00:26:21,379 --> 00:26:24,413 ♪ There's no containing it ♪ 638 00:26:24,415 --> 00:26:27,416 ♪ I can't wait any longer ♪ 639 00:26:27,418 --> 00:26:30,186 ♪ I've really, really got to ♪ 640 00:26:30,188 --> 00:26:32,922 ♪ Sh... ine a light on this issue ♪ 641 00:26:32,924 --> 00:26:34,323 ♪ ♪ 642 00:26:37,962 --> 00:26:40,062 ♪ I know what you mean ♪ 643 00:26:40,064 --> 00:26:43,966 ♪ I work at a hotline for suicidal teens ♪ 644 00:26:43,968 --> 00:26:45,635 What's your hashtag? 645 00:26:45,637 --> 00:26:47,403 We don't have one. It's a call center. 646 00:26:47,405 --> 00:26:49,305 Yeah, that's not a movement. 647 00:26:49,307 --> 00:26:52,208 ♪ Mine is a movement ♪ 648 00:26:52,210 --> 00:26:56,178 ♪ A big ol' stinky movement, oh ♪ 649 00:26:56,180 --> 00:26:59,115 ♪ It's gonna be a beauty, 'cause it's my duty ♪ 650 00:26:59,117 --> 00:27:01,951 ♪ To spread it all over the world ♪ 651 00:27:01,953 --> 00:27:03,386 ♪ I'm gonna spread it ♪ 652 00:27:03,388 --> 00:27:08,190 ♪ All over the world. ♪ 653 00:27:08,947 --> 00:27:11,594 It sounds like you're just talking about poop. 654 00:27:11,596 --> 00:27:12,528 What? No. 655 00:27:12,530 --> 00:27:14,384 I rarely poop. It's been a month. 656 00:27:14,866 --> 00:27:16,699 ♪ ♪ 657 00:27:22,250 --> 00:27:24,968 So, I'm glad to see you here again. 658 00:27:24,993 --> 00:27:27,793 How has everything been going? How are you feeling? 659 00:27:27,795 --> 00:27:30,234 Uh, not great. Still have the same problem. 660 00:27:30,698 --> 00:27:34,233 I'm so happy, and I feel so good all the time. 661 00:27:34,235 --> 00:27:36,029 And that's hard, because 662 00:27:36,068 --> 00:27:37,968 I know not everyone feels that way. 663 00:27:37,970 --> 00:27:40,904 - And that makes me sad. - I hear you. 664 00:27:40,906 --> 00:27:42,305 And that's wonderful. 665 00:27:42,307 --> 00:27:44,975 But maybe we could circle back to what you told me last week. 666 00:27:44,977 --> 00:27:46,943 About your mother shooting your father in cold blood 667 00:27:46,945 --> 00:27:48,244 in front of you on your birthday. 668 00:27:48,246 --> 00:27:49,679 Oh, I've moved beyond that. 669 00:27:49,681 --> 00:27:50,647 (chuckles) 670 00:27:50,649 --> 00:27:52,816 Dr. Akopian, we need to talk to you. 671 00:27:52,818 --> 00:27:55,485 Excuse me. You can't just burst into my office. 672 00:27:55,487 --> 00:27:56,886 It's okay. It's fine. 673 00:27:56,888 --> 00:27:58,462 Rebecca tried to kill herself. 674 00:27:58,487 --> 00:28:01,191 She needs this more than I do. Really, I'm good. 675 00:28:01,193 --> 00:28:02,726 - Like I said. - PAULA: See? 676 00:28:02,728 --> 00:28:05,095 - Kevin is fine with it. - Go get 'em, champ. 677 00:28:05,097 --> 00:28:08,131 Me and all the Bunchafriends, we're cheering you on. 678 00:28:08,133 --> 00:28:09,831 No! Kevin! 679 00:28:11,169 --> 00:28:13,136 (sobbing): Why, Mommy, why?! 680 00:28:13,138 --> 00:28:15,773 Rebecca, this is highly inappropriate. 681 00:28:15,798 --> 00:28:18,541 I'm so sorry. I know, I know. But it's an emergency. 682 00:28:18,543 --> 00:28:20,510 - I think I've been misdiagnosed. - Yeah. 683 00:28:20,512 --> 00:28:23,079 They told her she had some stupid personality thing. 684 00:28:23,081 --> 00:28:25,348 REBECCA: Okay, and I know that Dr. Shin consulted with you, 685 00:28:25,350 --> 00:28:27,517 but I think he tricked you into giving me that diagnosis 686 00:28:27,519 --> 00:28:29,419 by mansplaining you into it. 687 00:28:29,421 --> 00:28:32,288 Rebecca, did you talk to Dr. Shin? 688 00:28:32,290 --> 00:28:35,125 - Did you go to your group therapy? - No, I did not. 689 00:28:35,127 --> 00:28:37,127 Because I don't want to hear any more about it. 690 00:28:37,129 --> 00:28:39,095 I know it's wrong. I know in my heart it's wrong. 691 00:28:39,097 --> 00:28:40,897 So just give me a new thing, okay? Give me the thing I know 692 00:28:40,899 --> 00:28:43,166 you want to give me. Right? 'Cause it's a better thing. 693 00:28:44,903 --> 00:28:45,802 One, two, three, go. 694 00:28:45,804 --> 00:28:47,404 JOSH: So, um, 695 00:28:47,406 --> 00:28:48,571 okay, I'm ready. 696 00:28:48,573 --> 00:28:50,707 Give it to me straight. 697 00:28:50,709 --> 00:28:52,609 What is Rebecca saying about me? 698 00:28:52,611 --> 00:28:54,044 I've been there basically every day. 699 00:28:54,046 --> 00:28:55,645 Haven't heard your name once. 700 00:28:55,647 --> 00:28:56,813 You don't have to shield me. 701 00:28:56,815 --> 00:28:58,248 I can take it. 702 00:28:58,506 --> 00:29:02,018 I am responsible for someone almost taking their life. 703 00:29:02,194 --> 00:29:04,554 Look, from what I picked up in the hospital... 704 00:29:04,556 --> 00:29:06,189 And I'm in the inner circle; 705 00:29:06,191 --> 00:29:07,724 I provide snacks, advice, 706 00:29:07,726 --> 00:29:10,160 and an outlet for Valencia's aggression... 707 00:29:10,162 --> 00:29:12,095 Being suicidal has nothing to do 708 00:29:12,097 --> 00:29:14,130 with any one life event or person. 709 00:29:14,132 --> 00:29:17,000 It's more of a general mental illness thing. 710 00:29:17,002 --> 00:29:19,335 Um, yeah. Well, Rebecca has been obsessed with me 711 00:29:19,337 --> 00:29:21,738 since she was 16. I ruined her. 712 00:29:21,740 --> 00:29:24,974 Suicide is a cardinal sin, and I almost sin-assisted. 713 00:29:24,976 --> 00:29:26,309 No, this is on me, man. 714 00:29:26,311 --> 00:29:27,977 I-I've got to do something, 715 00:29:27,979 --> 00:29:29,946 see Rebecca, make things right. 716 00:29:29,948 --> 00:29:30,947 (sighs) 717 00:29:30,949 --> 00:29:32,315 Or you don't. 718 00:29:32,317 --> 00:29:33,349 Or I do. 719 00:29:33,351 --> 00:29:34,350 Or you really don't. 720 00:29:34,352 --> 00:29:35,218 I do, though. 721 00:29:35,220 --> 00:29:36,586 I don't think you really do. 722 00:29:36,588 --> 00:29:39,022 Except that I do, I think. 723 00:29:39,024 --> 00:29:40,056 I don't think so. 724 00:29:40,058 --> 00:29:41,591 AKOPIAN: Rebecca, it sounds 725 00:29:41,593 --> 00:29:44,828 like you don't have accurate information about borderline. 726 00:29:44,830 --> 00:29:47,997 Dr. Shin asked you not to look it up online, 727 00:29:47,999 --> 00:29:50,700 - but I'm suspecting that you did. - So what? 728 00:29:50,702 --> 00:29:52,635 Yeah, I did. So what? All right. 729 00:29:52,637 --> 00:29:55,139 Why don't we take a sec and look at the checklist, 730 00:29:55,164 --> 00:29:56,773 see if anything resonates. 731 00:29:56,775 --> 00:29:58,475 - What checklist? - To determine 732 00:29:58,477 --> 00:30:00,610 whether or not a person has BPD. 733 00:30:02,124 --> 00:30:05,715 A checklist sounds like homework. You like homework. 734 00:30:05,717 --> 00:30:07,984 Wait, why don't we just hear it and then see what we think? 735 00:30:07,986 --> 00:30:10,285 I mean, I am right here. I am right next to you. 736 00:30:10,310 --> 00:30:12,522 Yes, you are. 737 00:30:12,524 --> 00:30:14,724 Which is a whole nother thing we should talk about. 738 00:30:14,726 --> 00:30:16,126 - I don't... I don't... - All right, 739 00:30:16,128 --> 00:30:18,461 in order to receive a diagnosis for BPD, 740 00:30:18,463 --> 00:30:20,530 a person has to have at least five 741 00:30:20,532 --> 00:30:22,565 of the following nine tendencies. 742 00:30:22,567 --> 00:30:24,334 Just keep an open mind. 743 00:30:24,336 --> 00:30:27,337 Okay? Okay, the first one is 744 00:30:27,339 --> 00:30:29,906 severe mood swings. 745 00:30:29,908 --> 00:30:31,474 ♪ ♪ 746 00:30:31,476 --> 00:30:33,376 (chuckles) Well, we'll see about that. 747 00:30:33,378 --> 00:30:34,544 (both laugh) 748 00:30:34,546 --> 00:30:36,913 We'll see about that. 749 00:30:37,829 --> 00:30:40,483 Profound fear of abandonment. 750 00:30:40,875 --> 00:30:43,609 Josh. Hey, no, Josh! 751 00:30:44,343 --> 00:30:47,223 Instability in relationships. 752 00:30:47,225 --> 00:30:50,226 It's like you think I'm your daughter or something, but I'm not. 753 00:30:51,563 --> 00:30:53,554 Unstable sense of identity. 754 00:30:53,579 --> 00:30:56,266 I don't know who I am if you're not in my life anymore. 755 00:30:57,572 --> 00:31:00,807 Paranoia or dissociative episodes. 756 00:31:01,106 --> 00:31:03,106 What? Robert. 757 00:31:03,108 --> 00:31:04,108 No! 758 00:31:05,810 --> 00:31:08,011 Excessive and frequent anger. 759 00:31:08,013 --> 00:31:09,646 Stop running, you coward! 760 00:31:10,982 --> 00:31:13,116 Feelings of emptiness. 761 00:31:13,118 --> 00:31:16,019 My womb is empty, like my life. 762 00:31:17,522 --> 00:31:18,955 Impulsive behavior. 763 00:31:18,957 --> 00:31:20,657 (moaning) 764 00:31:24,444 --> 00:31:25,895 And, finally, 765 00:31:25,897 --> 00:31:30,033 recurring suicide threats or attempts. 766 00:31:31,818 --> 00:31:33,816 Oh, my God. 767 00:31:34,773 --> 00:31:35,939 I know. 768 00:31:35,941 --> 00:31:37,540 So not you, right? 769 00:31:37,542 --> 00:31:38,841 (chuckles) 770 00:31:38,843 --> 00:31:40,410 Paula, 771 00:31:40,511 --> 00:31:42,344 all those things were me. 772 00:31:43,051 --> 00:31:45,574 I don't have five... I have nine. 773 00:31:46,218 --> 00:31:48,618 (sighs) 774 00:31:55,062 --> 00:31:57,629 (crickets chirping) 775 00:31:58,897 --> 00:32:01,635 Hey. How'd it go? Did you get a new diagnosis? 776 00:32:01,660 --> 00:32:03,433 No. Uh, same one. 777 00:32:03,435 --> 00:32:05,826 But it's right. 778 00:32:06,357 --> 00:32:09,739 Yeah, the verdict's in. I am officially, medically, 779 00:32:09,741 --> 00:32:12,990 certifiably “crazy.” 780 00:32:13,378 --> 00:32:15,445 Well, no one said anything about crazy. 781 00:32:15,447 --> 00:32:19,048 Um, so, look, I-I appreciate everyone's support. 782 00:32:19,050 --> 00:32:20,650 And I love you guys. I really do. But... 783 00:32:20,652 --> 00:32:23,762 I'm very tired, so... I'm just gonna go to bed. 784 00:32:25,614 --> 00:32:26,926 Alone. 785 00:32:36,925 --> 00:32:39,392 I'm sure she just needs to rest. 786 00:32:39,504 --> 00:32:41,271 (door lock clicks) 787 00:32:51,755 --> 00:32:53,942 Good morning, Mother. Nathaniel, you're back. 788 00:32:54,255 --> 00:32:55,988 I waited for Dad to leave. 789 00:32:56,575 --> 00:32:58,153 Mom, I came back 790 00:32:58,155 --> 00:32:59,487 because I wanted to apologize 791 00:32:59,489 --> 00:33:01,122 for how I acted last night. 792 00:33:01,124 --> 00:33:02,691 Oh, no, that's okay. 793 00:33:02,693 --> 00:33:04,459 I know you don't like to rehash the past, 794 00:33:04,461 --> 00:33:06,040 and I respect that. 795 00:33:07,181 --> 00:33:10,081 I'm not trying to make you feel bad, really. 796 00:33:10,986 --> 00:33:14,939 I know we don't say this stuff in our house, but... 797 00:33:19,684 --> 00:33:21,828 I love you, Mom. 798 00:33:22,245 --> 00:33:25,608 And I want you to know that if you ever need me, 799 00:33:25,918 --> 00:33:27,651 I'm here. 800 00:33:29,578 --> 00:33:31,077 And you're right... 801 00:33:31,298 --> 00:33:33,264 These roses, they really are beautiful. 802 00:33:36,656 --> 00:33:38,210 Nathaniel, wait. 803 00:33:41,161 --> 00:33:44,869 When you were ten, I was going through a hard time. 804 00:33:46,576 --> 00:33:49,251 I made a mistake with my sleeping pills. 805 00:33:50,580 --> 00:33:52,036 Then I went away for a while 806 00:33:52,038 --> 00:33:55,908 to a place where I learned to sleep without pills. 807 00:33:57,877 --> 00:34:02,298 There was some sailing there. Not much. 808 00:34:03,793 --> 00:34:05,705 Anyway, you're right. 809 00:34:06,142 --> 00:34:07,685 I should have told you. 810 00:34:09,275 --> 00:34:10,421 Wow. 811 00:34:14,727 --> 00:34:16,527 Did we just have a talk? 812 00:34:17,469 --> 00:34:20,031 - I think we did. - (both laughing) 813 00:34:20,033 --> 00:34:23,034 - (gasps) Don't tell your father. - Oh, no, I won't. 814 00:34:23,036 --> 00:34:25,727 Do you want to take some of these roses to your friend? 815 00:34:26,302 --> 00:34:28,168 I think she'd like them. 816 00:34:35,215 --> 00:34:36,814 What are you guys doing? 817 00:34:36,816 --> 00:34:39,150 - Oh... - (groans) 818 00:34:39,152 --> 00:34:41,052 Um, just having a sleepover. 819 00:34:41,332 --> 00:34:44,722 Yeah, the floor's so cozy, I slept great. 820 00:34:44,724 --> 00:34:46,691 All right, guys, sorry, I got to pee, so, 821 00:34:46,693 --> 00:34:49,560 - I've just got to... - Oh. 822 00:34:49,562 --> 00:34:52,430 - All right, just watch your step. - O-Okay. 823 00:34:54,850 --> 00:34:57,001 I can go to the bathroom by myself. 824 00:34:57,475 --> 00:34:59,737 - Yeah, I mean, sure. - Totally. 825 00:34:59,739 --> 00:35:00,771 - Mm-hmm. - Yeah. 826 00:35:00,773 --> 00:35:02,473 Yeah. 827 00:35:05,535 --> 00:35:07,568 Okay, we can't do this. 828 00:35:08,047 --> 00:35:09,547 She's gonna sleep, she's gonna go to the bathroom, 829 00:35:09,549 --> 00:35:11,449 she's gonna cut bagels... We have to get used to it. 830 00:35:11,451 --> 00:35:13,751 (gasps) Oh, my God, I just remembered. 831 00:35:13,753 --> 00:35:15,353 I left toenail clippers in there. 832 00:35:15,355 --> 00:35:17,455 You clip your nails at my house? 833 00:35:17,457 --> 00:35:18,990 My toenails grow really fast, 834 00:35:18,992 --> 00:35:20,291 and they're super-thick so I carry these 835 00:35:20,293 --> 00:35:21,759 heavy-duty nail clippers on me. 836 00:35:21,761 --> 00:35:23,928 Okay, okay, let's just, like, calm down. 837 00:35:23,930 --> 00:35:25,463 She's not, like, gonna kill herself 838 00:35:25,465 --> 00:35:28,432 - with your nasty, oversized clippers. - All right. 839 00:35:28,434 --> 00:35:29,634 (sighs) Let's calm down. 840 00:35:29,636 --> 00:35:31,369 And I'm just, I'm knocking on the door 841 00:35:31,371 --> 00:35:33,703 and see if she's okay, that's all. 842 00:35:35,441 --> 00:35:36,578 Rebecca? 843 00:35:41,381 --> 00:35:42,980 Becca? 844 00:35:42,982 --> 00:35:45,650 (jiggling locked doorknob, knocking) 845 00:35:45,652 --> 00:35:47,251 Becky? 846 00:35:47,253 --> 00:35:51,255 Okay, she's not answering. 847 00:35:51,257 --> 00:35:54,592 - (knocking on door) - (ear-buds): ♪ Yes, no on the crazy ♪ 848 00:35:54,594 --> 00:35:57,461 ♪ We hope this helps. ♪ 849 00:35:57,735 --> 00:35:59,263 What? 850 00:35:59,265 --> 00:36:01,265 She never locks the bathroom door. 851 00:36:01,267 --> 00:36:02,934 Heather's right. Let's not panic. 852 00:36:02,936 --> 00:36:04,569 Okay, all right. (gasps) 853 00:36:04,571 --> 00:36:06,037 What are you doing? 854 00:36:06,039 --> 00:36:08,406 This is my intruder ax. I can't just stand out here. 855 00:36:08,408 --> 00:36:10,007 I thought you put all the sharp things away. 856 00:36:10,009 --> 00:36:11,642 I live in a famous murder house. 857 00:36:11,644 --> 00:36:13,077 You think I don't have an ax? 858 00:36:13,079 --> 00:36:14,212 Do it! Do it! 859 00:36:14,214 --> 00:36:16,314 - Just chop it down. - Just chop it... 860 00:36:16,316 --> 00:36:19,283 (screaming) 861 00:36:20,587 --> 00:36:22,253 Hey, girl. 862 00:36:22,255 --> 00:36:24,046 How was your pee? 863 00:36:30,230 --> 00:36:32,683 What is going on? 864 00:36:32,708 --> 00:36:35,542 Okay, so we may have been a touch worried. 865 00:36:35,544 --> 00:36:37,911 You didn't answer the door when we knocked. 866 00:36:37,913 --> 00:36:39,146 I had ear-buds in. 867 00:36:39,488 --> 00:36:41,615 - Oh, ear-buds. - Ear-buds, right. 868 00:36:41,617 --> 00:36:43,934 In your ears, so you couldn't... 869 00:36:43,959 --> 00:36:45,168 Makes total sense. 870 00:36:45,587 --> 00:36:47,654 I'm sorry to worry you guys. Look, I was in there 871 00:36:47,656 --> 00:36:49,156 doing this thing that I sometimes do 872 00:36:49,158 --> 00:36:50,857 to make sense of things, I was... 873 00:36:50,859 --> 00:36:54,127 listening to music and watching music videos and, yeah. 874 00:36:54,129 --> 00:36:56,463 Oh, yeah, cool, because we just thought 875 00:36:56,465 --> 00:37:00,300 - you were killing yourself. - (sobbing) 876 00:37:01,196 --> 00:37:04,137 We thought you were dead. 877 00:37:04,139 --> 00:37:06,439 We thought we were gonna open the door, 878 00:37:06,441 --> 00:37:07,874 and you'd be all kinds of dead. 879 00:37:07,876 --> 00:37:10,377 I'm so afraid you're gonna die, Rebecca. 880 00:37:10,379 --> 00:37:13,046 I'm so scared. (sniffs) 881 00:37:13,048 --> 00:37:16,383 I have never had a friend like you before. 882 00:37:16,706 --> 00:37:20,253 I... almost lost you. 883 00:37:20,255 --> 00:37:23,890 And I have been telling all these people... to have hope, 884 00:37:23,892 --> 00:37:26,993 when, really, I am so sad and so scared, 885 00:37:26,995 --> 00:37:30,297 and I have to poop so, so bad. 886 00:37:30,299 --> 00:37:32,732 - Oh, honey. - Oh. 887 00:37:33,041 --> 00:37:35,612 (Valencia sobs) 888 00:37:36,556 --> 00:37:38,438 Rebecca, please. 889 00:37:39,025 --> 00:37:42,042 Promise me you'll never do it again. 890 00:37:42,652 --> 00:37:45,619 I... I would lo... I would love to promise you that. 891 00:37:46,715 --> 00:37:48,673 I'd love to promise you all that. 892 00:37:49,797 --> 00:37:51,530 But I can't. 893 00:37:53,322 --> 00:37:54,971 Look... 894 00:37:55,666 --> 00:37:57,691 The way I felt on that plane, I don't, 895 00:37:57,693 --> 00:37:59,471 I don't ever want to feel like that again. 896 00:38:00,362 --> 00:38:04,174 And now that I know... what I have, 897 00:38:05,502 --> 00:38:07,834 I hope I can get the help that I need, 898 00:38:07,836 --> 00:38:09,936 but... the truth is, 899 00:38:09,938 --> 00:38:12,533 I don't know what the future holds. 900 00:38:13,619 --> 00:38:16,945 So I just can't promise anything to anyone, even myself. 901 00:38:18,601 --> 00:38:22,226 You know, for someone who's “crazy,” 902 00:38:22,463 --> 00:38:24,992 you sound pretty sane. 903 00:38:26,911 --> 00:38:28,672 Thank you, Heather. 904 00:38:31,426 --> 00:38:34,027 And I'm so sorry that I put you through this. 905 00:38:34,029 --> 00:38:35,295 Really. 906 00:38:35,297 --> 00:38:37,063 - Where is she? - (gasps) 907 00:38:37,065 --> 00:38:39,499 Where's my girl? Oh, I came as soon as I heard. 908 00:38:39,501 --> 00:38:42,435 She's fine, but what happened to you? 909 00:38:42,437 --> 00:38:45,305 WiJo and I were in a yurt, totally off the grid, 910 00:38:45,307 --> 00:38:47,274 and for one second, I got cell service, 911 00:38:47,276 --> 00:38:48,842 and all these messages came through, 912 00:38:48,844 --> 00:38:51,011 and I saw what was happening with you, 913 00:38:51,013 --> 00:38:53,813 so I borrowed this tank top from WiJo because it was so hot out, 914 00:38:53,815 --> 00:38:55,548 and then I hopped in my car, but it wouldn't start 915 00:38:55,550 --> 00:38:57,050 because the battery died, 916 00:38:57,052 --> 00:38:58,518 so I found a guy in one of the other yurts, 917 00:38:58,520 --> 00:39:01,154 and I borrowed his car, but it was a convertible. 918 00:39:01,156 --> 00:39:04,024 And there was so much traffic coming from the desert. 919 00:39:04,026 --> 00:39:06,927 So I just drove three hours in the sun. 920 00:39:06,929 --> 00:39:08,728 And I didn't stop for sunscreen. 921 00:39:08,730 --> 00:39:11,331 I had a hat but it fell off after five minutes. 922 00:39:11,434 --> 00:39:14,200 I knew I was burning, but I had to come see my girl. 923 00:39:14,202 --> 00:39:15,762 - Who needs skin? - Oh. 924 00:39:15,787 --> 00:39:18,905 - Oh. No, no, no. I'm sorry. - Sorry, sorry. Sorry, sorry, sorry. 925 00:39:18,907 --> 00:39:21,341 - You've been through so much. - No, Darryl, 926 00:39:21,343 --> 00:39:22,976 I want to apologize... 927 00:39:22,978 --> 00:39:24,411 for all the horrible things I said to you 928 00:39:24,413 --> 00:39:25,679 before I left for New York. 929 00:39:25,681 --> 00:39:28,315 It w... they were, they were all terrible. 930 00:39:28,317 --> 00:39:29,683 I want to apologize to all of you guys. 931 00:39:29,685 --> 00:39:31,618 You know I didn't mean any of that stuff. 932 00:39:31,620 --> 00:39:34,387 I know that. We know that. 933 00:39:34,389 --> 00:39:36,289 - Of course we do. - Absolutely. No question. 934 00:39:36,291 --> 00:39:38,291 (overlapping chatter) 935 00:39:38,293 --> 00:39:41,661 DARRYL: I swear to God, when I get my hands on that Josh Chan... 936 00:39:41,663 --> 00:39:43,296 When I get my hands on that jerk, 937 00:39:43,298 --> 00:39:44,931 I'm gonna give him a piece of my mind. 938 00:39:44,933 --> 00:39:46,199 Because you know what? 939 00:39:46,201 --> 00:39:48,223 I could murder Josh right now. 940 00:39:48,248 --> 00:39:49,803 I do have an ax. 941 00:39:49,805 --> 00:39:52,105 Good. This is all his fault. 942 00:39:52,107 --> 00:39:53,606 REBECCA: Darryl, calm down. 943 00:39:53,608 --> 00:39:55,275 This is not Josh's fault. 944 00:39:56,711 --> 00:40:00,580 I mean, it feels weird to even say Josh's name. 945 00:40:01,000 --> 00:40:03,414 I-I haven't thought about him in days. 946 00:40:03,919 --> 00:40:06,016 Truly. I mean, it-it's almost like... 947 00:40:06,822 --> 00:40:08,727 Josh is irrelevant. 948 00:40:09,324 --> 00:40:11,398 It's not even about Josh. 949 00:40:13,546 --> 00:40:15,453 Maybe it never was. 950 00:40:17,961 --> 00:40:20,233 Oh, Darryl, honey, let's-let's get you in... 951 00:40:20,664 --> 00:40:22,135 I don't know, some sort of ice bath. 952 00:40:22,137 --> 00:40:23,670 DARRYL: What does it mean when it blisters? 953 00:40:23,672 --> 00:40:24,971 REBECCA: Oh. Okay. 954 00:40:24,973 --> 00:40:26,973 No one touch him. No one touch him. 955 00:40:28,577 --> 00:40:30,143 So I'm here. 956 00:40:30,145 --> 00:40:32,645 And I'm ready to face it all. 957 00:40:32,647 --> 00:40:34,814 And I'm ready to start group therapy, too. 958 00:40:34,816 --> 00:40:36,216 I think you'll like it. 959 00:40:36,218 --> 00:40:38,585 Everyone is really nice and supportive. 960 00:40:38,587 --> 00:40:40,253 But, like, nuts, right? 961 00:40:40,255 --> 00:40:42,455 (laughs) Let's go. 962 00:40:42,457 --> 00:40:44,024 But you didn't answer me. 963 00:40:44,026 --> 00:40:45,831 Are they, are they all terrible? 964 00:40:49,765 --> 00:40:51,865 (sighs) 965 00:40:53,828 --> 00:40:55,568 You were not supposed to see me. 966 00:40:55,570 --> 00:40:57,804 I didn't know you delivered stuff. 967 00:40:57,806 --> 00:40:59,172 This your side hustle? 968 00:40:59,174 --> 00:41:00,573 (chuckles) 969 00:41:00,575 --> 00:41:01,775 Oh. 970 00:41:01,800 --> 00:41:04,546 Oh, these are beautiful. 971 00:41:10,519 --> 00:41:12,085 Wow, this is really sweet. 972 00:41:12,087 --> 00:41:13,586 Well, I mean it. 973 00:41:14,212 --> 00:41:15,779 I do. 974 00:41:16,258 --> 00:41:17,857 I'm here for you. 975 00:41:17,859 --> 00:41:19,025 Thank you. 976 00:41:19,932 --> 00:41:21,547 That really means a lot. 977 00:41:22,964 --> 00:41:24,597 I got a... I should get inside. 978 00:41:24,599 --> 00:41:26,099 I got a workbook in therapy today, 979 00:41:26,101 --> 00:41:27,534 and I love workbooks, so... 980 00:41:27,536 --> 00:41:28,835 You like to work? 981 00:41:28,837 --> 00:41:30,370 That's the first I've heard of it. 982 00:41:30,372 --> 00:41:32,539 (laughs) 983 00:41:33,781 --> 00:41:35,314 Oh, wait. Um, 984 00:41:35,339 --> 00:41:37,534 ju... um, brought this. 985 00:41:37,559 --> 00:41:38,812 Oh, my God, 986 00:41:38,814 --> 00:41:41,047 I was wondering where Ruth Gator Ginsburg went. 987 00:41:41,049 --> 00:41:42,415 Thank you. 988 00:41:42,572 --> 00:41:44,348 I'm, uh... 989 00:41:45,367 --> 00:41:46,911 I'm glad you're home. 990 00:41:56,098 --> 00:42:00,427 -- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe -- -- www.addic7ed.com -- 72369

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