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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,160 --> 00:00:06,560 Let me guess, you're either hiding from our neighbor Dave, 2 00:00:06,630 --> 00:00:08,900 or the Jehovah's Witnesses are back. 3 00:00:09,070 --> 00:00:11,100 Look, I just want to get my newspaper, 4 00:00:11,170 --> 00:00:12,920 but every time I go outside, 5 00:00:12,970 --> 00:00:15,800 the guy just sneaks up on me all quiet like a Prius. 6 00:00:15,870 --> 00:00:17,140 [LAUGHS] 7 00:00:17,210 --> 00:00:18,510 You know, the other day, 8 00:00:18,520 --> 00:00:20,210 he cornered me talking about Michigan. 9 00:00:20,280 --> 00:00:24,010 I spent 30 minutes listening to him rank the Great Lakes. 10 00:00:24,080 --> 00:00:26,910 [LAUGHS] Yup, he did the same thing to me, 11 00:00:26,980 --> 00:00:29,850 and, ironically, Lake Superior not number one. 12 00:00:31,490 --> 00:00:33,450 What kind of world do we live in 13 00:00:33,520 --> 00:00:35,920 where a man can't go outside his own home 14 00:00:35,990 --> 00:00:38,160 without having to say hello to his neighbor? 15 00:00:39,150 --> 00:00:40,440 What are you doing? 16 00:00:40,480 --> 00:00:41,850 He's hiding from Dave. 17 00:00:41,920 --> 00:00:43,849 Why? The only thing scary about him 18 00:00:43,850 --> 00:00:45,750 are the tiny shorts he jogs in. 19 00:00:45,820 --> 00:00:47,320 Tell me about it. 20 00:00:47,390 --> 00:00:49,190 The last time I saw that much white meat 21 00:00:49,210 --> 00:00:50,720 it was fried and in a bucket. 22 00:00:50,790 --> 00:00:52,760 [LAUGHTER] 23 00:00:52,830 --> 00:00:55,230 Well, I know he's not like most folks around here, 24 00:00:55,300 --> 00:00:57,160 but I think Dave is kind of cool. 25 00:00:57,230 --> 00:00:59,430 All I know is, since they moved into this neighborhood, 26 00:00:59,500 --> 00:01:01,730 I feel like I'm on house arrest. 27 00:01:01,800 --> 00:01:04,900 Well, I say don't you let fear of Dave imprison you, Pop. 28 00:01:04,970 --> 00:01:06,670 Throw off the chains of your oppressor 29 00:01:06,740 --> 00:01:08,410 and go get that newspaper, my brother! 30 00:01:11,780 --> 00:01:13,540 But before you do, close your robe. 31 00:01:13,610 --> 00:01:14,850 I can see your chicken nuggets. 32 00:01:14,880 --> 00:01:16,080 Hey. 33 00:01:20,350 --> 00:01:22,550 Dad, what are you doing? 34 00:01:22,620 --> 00:01:25,220 I'm seeing if Calvin's outside. I want to give him something. 35 00:01:25,290 --> 00:01:27,590 I was talking about your shorts. 36 00:01:29,630 --> 00:01:31,800 Well, this is what people wear in California. 37 00:01:31,810 --> 00:01:34,030 It's so you don't overheat when you're running. 38 00:01:34,100 --> 00:01:36,700 That's smart, 'cause if I wore those to school 39 00:01:36,770 --> 00:01:38,640 I'd definitely get chased. 40 00:01:39,500 --> 00:01:42,710 Yeah, by all the ladies. 41 00:01:42,780 --> 00:01:44,519 Ready for school, Grover? 42 00:01:44,520 --> 00:01:46,880 Whoa, look at those sexy legs. 43 00:01:47,920 --> 00:01:50,720 - Told you. - Why are you still here? 44 00:01:50,730 --> 00:01:51,780 I thought you were going for a run. 45 00:01:51,800 --> 00:01:53,750 Oh, I'm about to. I was hoping to catch Calvin outside. 46 00:01:53,760 --> 00:01:55,166 I want to give him a key to our house. 47 00:01:55,190 --> 00:01:56,460 - Really? - Yeah. 48 00:01:56,470 --> 00:01:58,100 Don't you think it's a little too soon for that? 49 00:01:58,120 --> 00:02:00,200 Uh, well, no, he's our neighbor. 50 00:02:00,240 --> 00:02:02,040 We gave all our neighbors keys back in Michigan. 51 00:02:02,060 --> 00:02:04,430 Grammy says people in Michigan are good, 52 00:02:04,500 --> 00:02:06,740 not like here where they're all criminals 53 00:02:06,760 --> 00:02:08,180 and Hollywood elites. 54 00:02:10,040 --> 00:02:11,270 When did Grammy say that? 55 00:02:11,340 --> 00:02:13,640 Just now. We're texting. 56 00:02:13,710 --> 00:02:15,970 Oh, hey, guys, there's Calvin. 57 00:02:16,040 --> 00:02:18,200 Buddy, have a great day. Bye. 58 00:02:19,250 --> 00:02:22,480 Mom, what do you think of Dad's shorts? 59 00:02:22,550 --> 00:02:24,520 Honestly, I thought they were yours. 60 00:02:27,620 --> 00:02:30,620 - Hey, Calvin! - Oh. 61 00:02:30,690 --> 00:02:31,890 Hey, Dave. 62 00:02:31,960 --> 00:02:33,220 Hey, I'm glad I ran into you. 63 00:02:33,280 --> 00:02:34,306 I want to give you something. 64 00:02:34,330 --> 00:02:35,339 Really? 65 00:02:35,340 --> 00:02:37,600 There's enough fabric in those for pockets? 66 00:02:38,580 --> 00:02:39,800 Here you go. 67 00:02:39,870 --> 00:02:40,970 What's that? 68 00:02:41,000 --> 00:02:42,000 Well, it's a key to our house. 69 00:02:42,020 --> 00:02:43,630 I want you to have it. 70 00:02:43,700 --> 00:02:45,320 I now pronounce us neighbors. 71 00:02:46,840 --> 00:02:48,370 Nah, I'm good, man. 72 00:02:48,440 --> 00:02:49,510 [CHUCKLES] 73 00:02:49,580 --> 00:02:51,310 Wh-What do you mean you're good? 74 00:02:51,380 --> 00:02:52,990 I don't need a key to your house. 75 00:02:53,000 --> 00:02:54,040 What if there's an emergency, 76 00:02:54,050 --> 00:02:55,680 or you want to borrow something and we're not home, 77 00:02:55,700 --> 00:02:57,146 or it's my birthday and you want to throw me 78 00:02:57,170 --> 00:02:58,720 a surprise birthday party. 79 00:02:58,790 --> 00:03:01,720 I'm not throwing you a surprise party. 80 00:03:01,790 --> 00:03:03,439 Exactly what someone throwing me 81 00:03:03,440 --> 00:03:04,890 a surprise party would say. 82 00:03:06,460 --> 00:03:09,020 Look, Dave, I don't know what it's like where you're from... 83 00:03:09,040 --> 00:03:10,190 Oh, it is beautiful. 84 00:03:10,260 --> 00:03:12,220 I mean, the trees, 85 00:03:12,240 --> 00:03:14,030 they go on for miles. 86 00:03:14,100 --> 00:03:16,870 Okay, look, that's-that's not what I'm talking about. 87 00:03:16,940 --> 00:03:20,540 Around here, we don't give out keys to people we just met. 88 00:03:20,610 --> 00:03:21,720 Well, how come? 89 00:03:21,800 --> 00:03:24,440 Simple, people are terrible. 90 00:03:25,650 --> 00:03:26,760 No, they're not, people are great. 91 00:03:26,770 --> 00:03:28,426 You should try giving them the benefit of the doubt. 92 00:03:28,450 --> 00:03:30,380 I do. I doubt them every day. 93 00:03:31,420 --> 00:03:34,190 Okay, look, just take the key, okay? 94 00:03:34,250 --> 00:03:35,859 O-Okay, if I take this key, 95 00:03:35,860 --> 00:03:37,789 can I go read my paper in peace? 96 00:03:37,790 --> 00:03:38,920 Absolutely. 97 00:03:38,990 --> 00:03:40,060 Oh, fine. 98 00:03:40,130 --> 00:03:42,830 All right, talk to you later. See you. 99 00:03:42,900 --> 00:03:44,660 Oh, and just one more thing, um... 100 00:03:44,730 --> 00:03:47,160 Dave, we had a deal. 101 00:03:47,230 --> 00:03:49,170 I was just wondering, 102 00:03:49,240 --> 00:03:51,840 is there anything maybe that you want to give to me? 103 00:03:51,900 --> 00:03:54,070 Yes, some advice. 104 00:03:54,140 --> 00:03:55,620 Stop jogging through the neighborhood 105 00:03:55,680 --> 00:03:57,620 in your hot pants. 106 00:03:58,440 --> 00:04:00,720 ♪ Welcome to the block, welcome to the neighborhood ♪ 107 00:04:00,740 --> 00:04:02,680 ♪ Welcome to the hood. ♪ 108 00:04:04,060 --> 00:04:06,420 I thought you guys were going to the park. 109 00:04:06,470 --> 00:04:07,570 It's kind of hot out, 110 00:04:07,640 --> 00:04:09,740 so we thought we'd just hang out here instead. 111 00:04:09,810 --> 00:04:11,540 Dad says he doesn't want to go outside 112 00:04:11,570 --> 00:04:13,750 because Mr. Calvin didn't give him a key. 113 00:04:16,300 --> 00:04:20,700 Grover, it's called father/son confidentiality. 114 00:04:20,770 --> 00:04:22,570 Are you still hung up on this key thing? 115 00:04:22,640 --> 00:04:24,840 It's awkward now. 116 00:04:24,910 --> 00:04:26,080 Like when you wave to someone 117 00:04:26,120 --> 00:04:29,280 who you thought was waving to you, but they weren't. 118 00:04:29,350 --> 00:04:32,780 I told you to stop waving at everyone. 119 00:04:33,580 --> 00:04:36,250 I'm a waver, Gemma. 120 00:04:36,320 --> 00:04:38,320 It's what I do. 121 00:04:38,380 --> 00:04:40,260 You know I love how enthusiastic you are, 122 00:04:40,320 --> 00:04:42,420 but sometimes it can get a little out of hand. 123 00:04:42,490 --> 00:04:44,090 Name one time. 124 00:04:44,160 --> 00:04:46,300 You proposed to me on our third date. 125 00:04:47,620 --> 00:04:49,770 Yeah. That is because... 126 00:04:50,700 --> 00:04:52,130 we had just had sex. 127 00:04:54,210 --> 00:04:56,130 I'm just saying sometimes you're ready for things 128 00:04:56,170 --> 00:04:57,570 before other people are. 129 00:04:57,590 --> 00:04:59,040 It might take a while for Calvin. 130 00:04:59,050 --> 00:05:02,440 Yeah, but it's been a month, and by that time... 131 00:05:03,510 --> 00:05:05,450 ... we had had a bunch of sex. 132 00:05:05,520 --> 00:05:07,079 Come on, baby, I'll take you, 133 00:05:07,080 --> 00:05:08,580 and if you want to connect to Calvin, 134 00:05:08,590 --> 00:05:09,630 maybe you should try finding something 135 00:05:09,640 --> 00:05:10,820 you guys have in common. 136 00:05:10,840 --> 00:05:13,620 I'll try, but this guy doesn't even have a favorite lake. 137 00:05:15,330 --> 00:05:17,930 - What up! What up! - Oh, hey, baby. 138 00:05:18,000 --> 00:05:20,060 Well, I see you brought your laundry again. 139 00:05:20,080 --> 00:05:22,830 That's right, colors and a few whites, 140 00:05:22,900 --> 00:05:25,470 just like this neighborhood since the Johnsons moved in. 141 00:05:26,800 --> 00:05:29,410 Well, here, let me take those for you. 142 00:05:29,470 --> 00:05:31,250 Ma, how come you still do Marty's laundry, 143 00:05:31,280 --> 00:05:32,510 but you won't do mine? 144 00:05:32,580 --> 00:05:34,010 It's because he doesn't live here. 145 00:05:34,020 --> 00:05:36,080 It's how I make sure I see my baby boy. 146 00:05:36,150 --> 00:05:38,110 Yeah, if she wants to see you, 147 00:05:38,160 --> 00:05:39,850 all she has to do is check the couch. 148 00:05:41,320 --> 00:05:44,090 Baby, leave him alone. He's looking for a job. 149 00:05:44,160 --> 00:05:46,990 What job? Manager of throw pillows? 150 00:05:47,060 --> 00:05:48,640 [LAUGHING] 151 00:05:48,720 --> 00:05:51,960 Yeah, that sounds like a cushy job. 152 00:05:52,030 --> 00:05:54,100 Oh, and by the way, 153 00:05:54,170 --> 00:05:56,430 this fell out of your pocket in the wash. 154 00:05:56,500 --> 00:05:58,300 - [GROANS] - What's wrong? 155 00:05:58,370 --> 00:06:00,370 It's a key to Dave's house. 156 00:06:00,440 --> 00:06:02,910 He gave it to me in case of an emergency. 157 00:06:02,970 --> 00:06:05,810 Like I'm gonna help him in an emergency. 158 00:06:06,760 --> 00:06:08,340 I think that's nice. 159 00:06:08,370 --> 00:06:10,210 We could all learn a lesson from Dave, 160 00:06:10,280 --> 00:06:12,450 how to open our hearts to our neighbors, right? 161 00:06:12,520 --> 00:06:14,380 That guy can't teach me anything. 162 00:06:14,450 --> 00:06:16,119 Well, you know, I'm glad he moved in. 163 00:06:16,120 --> 00:06:18,390 Giving out keys, waving at everybody. 164 00:06:18,460 --> 00:06:20,536 He is the most entertaining thing to happen around here 165 00:06:20,560 --> 00:06:22,290 since Crackhead Victor found that horse. 166 00:06:22,360 --> 00:06:25,290 Remember when he tried to footrace him? 167 00:06:25,360 --> 00:06:28,300 [LAUGHTER] 168 00:06:28,370 --> 00:06:29,970 Ay, well, you might not like it, Pop, 169 00:06:29,980 --> 00:06:31,370 but, uh, Dave lives here now. 170 00:06:31,440 --> 00:06:33,170 That makes him part of our community. 171 00:06:33,240 --> 00:06:34,700 No, no, it doesn't. 172 00:06:34,770 --> 00:06:36,470 You don't let someone into your community 173 00:06:36,490 --> 00:06:38,510 just because they give you a spare key. 174 00:06:38,580 --> 00:06:40,380 Come on now, let's go work on this truck. 175 00:06:40,400 --> 00:06:41,499 Aw, come on, Pop. 176 00:06:41,500 --> 00:06:43,680 That truck is always broke, and it never works. 177 00:06:43,750 --> 00:06:46,110 Then you two got something in common. Come on now. 178 00:06:49,120 --> 00:06:50,420 Hey, guys. 179 00:06:51,140 --> 00:06:53,060 What year is that, a '64? 180 00:06:53,120 --> 00:06:55,520 Close, '65. 181 00:06:55,590 --> 00:06:57,690 Oof, should've known. 182 00:06:57,760 --> 00:07:00,540 '64 didn't have turn signals above the headlights. 183 00:07:00,680 --> 00:07:03,600 Oh, you sound like you know a thing or two about trucks, Dave. 184 00:07:03,670 --> 00:07:05,400 Well, you know, I am from Michigan. 185 00:07:05,560 --> 00:07:08,570 Detroit, the Motor City, 186 00:07:08,640 --> 00:07:10,640 The D. 187 00:07:12,240 --> 00:07:14,240 Dave from The D! 188 00:07:18,980 --> 00:07:20,620 See you guys got a V-8 in there 189 00:07:20,680 --> 00:07:21,700 instead of the straight six. 190 00:07:21,720 --> 00:07:23,450 That's like 50 more horses, huh? 191 00:07:23,520 --> 00:07:25,390 Yes, it is. 192 00:07:25,460 --> 00:07:27,360 So I guess you do know your stuff. 193 00:07:27,420 --> 00:07:30,760 Yeah, like I said, Dave from the D. 194 00:07:32,030 --> 00:07:34,540 Dad, I want to use the iPad. 195 00:07:34,640 --> 00:07:37,030 Are you done googling Mr. Calvin's truck? 196 00:07:41,310 --> 00:07:43,310 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, man. 197 00:07:44,540 --> 00:07:46,480 What is wrong with you? 198 00:07:46,540 --> 00:07:48,880 Googling another man's truck? 199 00:07:48,950 --> 00:07:51,250 Bruh. 200 00:07:51,320 --> 00:07:54,150 I was just trying to find some common ground with you. 201 00:07:54,220 --> 00:07:56,590 [SCOFFS] What, by lying to us that you know about trucks? 202 00:07:56,650 --> 00:07:58,890 - Yeah. - Yeah, but in a neighborly way. 203 00:07:58,960 --> 00:08:00,460 Wh-What's going on here, man? 204 00:08:02,360 --> 00:08:04,830 Uh, look, I know I don't always show my emotions. 205 00:08:07,360 --> 00:08:10,630 But the other day when I gave you a key 206 00:08:10,700 --> 00:08:13,440 and you didn't give me one back, it bothered me. 207 00:08:13,500 --> 00:08:15,760 Bruh. 208 00:08:16,140 --> 00:08:17,799 You know what? You want a key? 209 00:08:17,800 --> 00:08:19,139 You know what? Fine. 210 00:08:19,140 --> 00:08:20,680 Here. Here's a damn key. 211 00:08:20,740 --> 00:08:23,480 Are you sure? I don't want to impose. 212 00:08:25,500 --> 00:08:26,880 Okay. 213 00:08:31,490 --> 00:08:33,420 I can't believe you like that guy. 214 00:08:33,490 --> 00:08:35,460 I can't believe you gave him a key. 215 00:08:35,530 --> 00:08:37,220 I gave him a key. 216 00:08:37,320 --> 00:08:39,160 I didn't give him the key. 217 00:08:39,230 --> 00:08:41,660 Okay, then what was that one to? 218 00:08:41,730 --> 00:08:42,980 Oh, that was to your Uncle Clyde's 219 00:08:42,990 --> 00:08:44,700 storage locker in West Covina. 220 00:08:45,900 --> 00:08:48,200 Yeah, if ever he needs 35 broken TVs 221 00:08:48,270 --> 00:08:50,870 or a box of autographed Hammer pants, he all set. 222 00:08:57,440 --> 00:08:59,220 - [WHISTLING] - [DOOR CLOSES] 223 00:08:59,290 --> 00:09:03,590 Ooh, look at you looking all fresh and sexy. 224 00:09:03,660 --> 00:09:05,519 Girl, you treating me like a piece of meat. 225 00:09:05,520 --> 00:09:06,530 [LAUGHS] 226 00:09:06,560 --> 00:09:08,020 And I like it. 227 00:09:10,300 --> 00:09:11,860 Mmm. 228 00:09:11,930 --> 00:09:13,870 What's got you all riled up? 229 00:09:13,930 --> 00:09:17,220 Well, Gemma told me about how you gave Dave the key, 230 00:09:17,260 --> 00:09:19,020 and it got me to thinking what a big, 231 00:09:19,060 --> 00:09:20,750 generous man I married, 232 00:09:20,780 --> 00:09:23,760 and I guess it put me in a generous mood, too. 233 00:09:23,780 --> 00:09:26,080 - [LAUGHING] - Yeah, you know, baby, 234 00:09:26,100 --> 00:09:27,110 a-about the key... 235 00:09:27,180 --> 00:09:28,836 - you know, I-I was... - No, no, listen, baby. Shh. 236 00:09:28,860 --> 00:09:30,680 Don't be embarrassed, okay? 237 00:09:30,750 --> 00:09:32,340 I love it when you're not afraid 238 00:09:32,370 --> 00:09:35,640 to let people see past that rough and tough exterior. 239 00:09:35,680 --> 00:09:38,919 Makes me know that you are still that big, soft teddy bear 240 00:09:38,920 --> 00:09:41,690 that I married and I'm in love with. 241 00:09:41,760 --> 00:09:43,060 [BOTH LAUGH] 242 00:09:43,100 --> 00:09:46,320 - Yeah? - Yeah. [LAUGHS] 243 00:09:46,400 --> 00:09:48,979 And you know what bears like? 244 00:09:48,980 --> 00:09:50,369 Honey. 245 00:09:50,370 --> 00:09:54,240 [BOTH LAUGHING] 246 00:09:55,180 --> 00:09:56,640 That taste good, too. 247 00:09:56,710 --> 00:09:58,160 - Uh-huh. - [LAUGHING] 248 00:09:58,240 --> 00:09:59,880 I made the boys go to the movies, 249 00:09:59,940 --> 00:10:03,680 so I will be waiting for you in the cave. 250 00:10:07,350 --> 00:10:09,350 [DOOR OPENS, CLOSES] 251 00:10:11,040 --> 00:10:13,140 Man, I know that key was fake, 252 00:10:13,260 --> 00:10:15,230 but Lord, this about to get real. 253 00:10:18,160 --> 00:10:20,559 ♪ Today is a good day ♪ 254 00:10:20,560 --> 00:10:21,629 [LAUGHS] 255 00:10:21,630 --> 00:10:23,600 ♪ Nah, nah-nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah... ♪ 256 00:10:23,620 --> 00:10:25,740 My, this smells good up in here. 257 00:10:25,760 --> 00:10:28,220 Ah. I'm making banana pancakes. 258 00:10:28,260 --> 00:10:29,600 I'll fix you a plate. Sit down. 259 00:10:29,640 --> 00:10:32,300 All right. Ma, what's got you in such a good mood? 260 00:10:32,360 --> 00:10:33,999 Well, let's just say while you and your brother 261 00:10:34,000 --> 00:10:35,319 were out last night, 262 00:10:35,320 --> 00:10:38,480 your father and I had a... sensual evening. 263 00:10:40,220 --> 00:10:42,260 And there goes my appetite. 264 00:10:42,300 --> 00:10:46,400 ♪ Today is a good day, today is a good day ♪ 265 00:10:46,420 --> 00:10:48,170 ♪ Nah, nah-nah, nah, nah, nah, nah... ♪ 266 00:10:48,200 --> 00:10:50,620 - ♪ Yeah, baby. ♪ - How you doing, baby? 267 00:10:50,660 --> 00:10:51,760 - Mwah. - [BOTH LAUGH] 268 00:10:51,830 --> 00:10:53,659 I would ask for some more honey, 269 00:10:53,660 --> 00:10:54,899 but I believe we fresh out. 270 00:10:54,900 --> 00:10:56,230 Ooh. [LAUGHS] 271 00:10:56,300 --> 00:10:57,900 Hey, man. 272 00:10:57,970 --> 00:10:59,440 That was family honey. 273 00:10:59,510 --> 00:11:02,139 You want me to make you a plate, babe? 274 00:11:02,140 --> 00:11:03,610 Yeah. You know, I'll be right back. 275 00:11:03,680 --> 00:11:05,239 - I'm-a go get my paper. - Oh, guess what. 276 00:11:05,240 --> 00:11:07,110 - Mm-hmm. - I'll keep it warm for you. 277 00:11:07,180 --> 00:11:08,880 [LAUGHS] You always do. 278 00:11:08,900 --> 00:11:10,050 [LAUGHS] 279 00:11:10,120 --> 00:11:11,920 Enjoy your pancakes, son. 280 00:11:13,450 --> 00:11:15,950 Your father's a good man. 281 00:11:16,020 --> 00:11:17,960 Yeah? And why do you say that? 282 00:11:18,020 --> 00:11:19,920 Well, he's finally starting 283 00:11:19,940 --> 00:11:22,540 to open up to Dave, just like I told him to do. 284 00:11:22,560 --> 00:11:24,599 Yeah, opened up by giving him a fake key. 285 00:11:24,600 --> 00:11:26,310 A fake key? Now what now? 286 00:11:27,820 --> 00:11:30,499 You know, look, Dave wouldn't let it go, Ma, 287 00:11:30,500 --> 00:11:32,790 so Dad just gave him a fake key to shut him up. 288 00:11:32,860 --> 00:11:35,820 [SIGHS] So he didn't listen to me? 289 00:11:35,890 --> 00:11:37,460 He doesn't listen to anyone. 290 00:11:37,530 --> 00:11:40,120 And to think I spent all morning 291 00:11:40,160 --> 00:11:41,760 getting honey out of my sheets! 292 00:11:45,900 --> 00:11:48,770 - Ah. Yeah. - [DOOR RATTLING] 293 00:11:48,800 --> 00:11:50,000 What? 294 00:11:50,020 --> 00:11:51,340 Hey, baby. Tina? 295 00:11:51,410 --> 00:11:53,230 The door locked accidentally. 296 00:11:53,240 --> 00:11:54,880 [DOOR RATTLING] 297 00:11:58,280 --> 00:12:01,020 You thought you was slick. 298 00:12:01,080 --> 00:12:03,820 Lying to me about giving Dave the key? 299 00:12:03,890 --> 00:12:05,990 - Babe, let me explain. - Oh. You're gonna explain. 300 00:12:06,000 --> 00:12:07,250 - Mm-hmm. - Okay. Wait. What you... ? 301 00:12:07,270 --> 00:12:08,360 Who you calling? 302 00:12:08,420 --> 00:12:09,890 Hey, Dave! 303 00:12:09,960 --> 00:12:11,890 Yeah. 304 00:12:11,900 --> 00:12:14,170 Can you do me a favor? I'm at the store, 305 00:12:14,200 --> 00:12:17,160 and apparently, Calvin locked himself outside. 306 00:12:17,230 --> 00:12:19,630 Uh-huh. [LAUGHS] Big dummy. 307 00:12:19,700 --> 00:12:21,900 Tina, come on. Baby, I'm your husband. 308 00:12:21,970 --> 00:12:23,970 We were sensual last night. 309 00:12:24,040 --> 00:12:26,410 Oh, you will? Oh. 310 00:12:26,480 --> 00:12:27,819 Thanks so much, Dave. 311 00:12:27,820 --> 00:12:29,749 You're the best. [LAUGHS] 312 00:12:29,750 --> 00:12:31,380 And you ain't. 313 00:12:33,450 --> 00:12:34,820 Hey, Malcolm? 314 00:12:34,880 --> 00:12:36,800 Hey, Malcolm! Malcolm, come on, man. 315 00:12:36,820 --> 00:12:38,720 Your mama trippin'. Come and unlock the door! 316 00:12:40,260 --> 00:12:42,260 I can't help you, bruh. 317 00:12:46,500 --> 00:12:48,060 [DOOR CLOSES] 318 00:12:48,130 --> 00:12:50,930 Hey, Calvin, I just got off with Tina. 319 00:12:51,000 --> 00:12:53,870 Got your keys right here. 320 00:12:53,900 --> 00:12:56,670 Malcolm! Malcolm, come on, open the door, please. 321 00:12:56,740 --> 00:12:59,010 I love you, son. 322 00:12:59,900 --> 00:13:02,340 - I told you you wouldn't regret this. - [LAUGHS] 323 00:13:02,410 --> 00:13:04,040 All right, let me open her up for you. 324 00:13:04,100 --> 00:13:05,579 All right. 325 00:13:05,580 --> 00:13:07,210 - Okay. - Yeah. 326 00:13:07,280 --> 00:13:08,620 [LAUGHS] 327 00:13:08,690 --> 00:13:10,220 Here we go. 328 00:13:10,290 --> 00:13:12,650 There we go. 329 00:13:12,720 --> 00:13:14,420 Why are you blocking the door? 330 00:13:14,490 --> 00:13:16,790 - I'm not blocking the door. - Okay. 331 00:13:16,860 --> 00:13:19,130 [LAUGHS, MUMBLES] 332 00:13:19,200 --> 00:13:22,260 Gotta change these out. 333 00:13:22,330 --> 00:13:23,930 This isn't a key to your house, is it? 334 00:13:24,000 --> 00:13:25,900 - Of course it is. - You sure? 335 00:13:25,970 --> 00:13:27,199 Sure I'm sure. 336 00:13:27,200 --> 00:13:28,620 So if I put this key 337 00:13:28,710 --> 00:13:30,440 in that lock, that door'll open? 338 00:13:31,420 --> 00:13:33,140 It will not. 339 00:13:34,380 --> 00:13:36,480 - Unbelievable! - Look, 340 00:13:36,550 --> 00:13:38,749 Dave, no. Let me explain it to you, Dave. 341 00:13:38,750 --> 00:13:40,380 Don't be like that. Dave! 342 00:13:40,450 --> 00:13:42,450 Dave from the D! 343 00:13:43,890 --> 00:13:45,450 What are you making? 344 00:13:45,520 --> 00:13:46,950 Mac and cheese. 345 00:13:47,020 --> 00:13:48,420 I needed some comfort food. 346 00:13:48,920 --> 00:13:50,320 Why is it brown? 347 00:13:50,390 --> 00:13:52,660 All we had was chocolate milk. 348 00:13:55,030 --> 00:13:57,670 Sweetie, you got to get over this Calvin thing. 349 00:13:57,730 --> 00:13:58,899 But we're neighbors. 350 00:13:58,900 --> 00:13:59,980 We should be friends. 351 00:14:00,100 --> 00:14:02,020 I know you're upset, but you do realize 352 00:14:02,040 --> 00:14:03,500 this is kind of your fault. 353 00:14:03,570 --> 00:14:04,640 How? 354 00:14:04,710 --> 00:14:06,340 Come on, admit it. 355 00:14:06,410 --> 00:14:08,139 The real reason you gave Calvin a key 356 00:14:08,140 --> 00:14:09,999 is because you were hoping he'd give you one. 357 00:14:10,000 --> 00:14:11,339 Like when you give me a back rub 358 00:14:11,340 --> 00:14:12,749 because you want one, too. 359 00:14:12,750 --> 00:14:15,020 Oh, that's not true. I don't even like back rubs. 360 00:14:15,080 --> 00:14:16,920 I do it because I want to have sex. 361 00:14:18,640 --> 00:14:20,900 Exactly. You're not giving it because you want to, 362 00:14:20,920 --> 00:14:23,120 you're giving it because you want something in return. 363 00:14:23,190 --> 00:14:25,200 In fact, sometimes I think the only reason 364 00:14:25,240 --> 00:14:26,860 you wave at everybody is because 365 00:14:26,930 --> 00:14:28,530 you want them to wave at you. 366 00:14:29,240 --> 00:14:30,600 How dare you? 367 00:14:30,670 --> 00:14:33,330 Just saying, maybe you should think about it 368 00:14:33,400 --> 00:14:36,770 while you wallow in your disgusting pity pasta. 369 00:14:39,920 --> 00:14:41,110 What are you doing here? 370 00:14:41,180 --> 00:14:42,840 I got to get my laundry back. 371 00:14:42,880 --> 00:14:44,226 Man, I'm down to my swimming trunks. 372 00:14:44,250 --> 00:14:46,220 Hey. 373 00:14:46,280 --> 00:14:47,760 Yeah, well, I don't think you want to be here. 374 00:14:47,780 --> 00:14:49,220 Moms is still not talking to Pops, 375 00:14:49,290 --> 00:14:51,050 and he's blaming me for ratting him out. 376 00:14:51,120 --> 00:14:52,520 Okay, well, in that case, 377 00:14:52,550 --> 00:14:54,220 I'm just gonna turn these inside out. 378 00:14:54,290 --> 00:14:57,120 Well, well, well. 379 00:14:57,190 --> 00:14:58,860 If it ain't the dynamic duo: 380 00:14:58,930 --> 00:15:01,600 Laundry Boy and the Snitch. 381 00:15:03,100 --> 00:15:04,500 You know, I got a job. 382 00:15:04,570 --> 00:15:06,030 I could just buy some new underwear. 383 00:15:06,100 --> 00:15:08,100 Hey, Marty. 384 00:15:08,120 --> 00:15:10,540 Mommy was just about to fold your laundry. 385 00:15:10,600 --> 00:15:12,540 - Hmm. - Oh, yeah, and here's yours. 386 00:15:12,610 --> 00:15:14,310 Oh. Thanks. Okay. 387 00:15:14,380 --> 00:15:16,080 All right. All right, Tina. 388 00:15:16,150 --> 00:15:19,900 Babe, I already apologized for not being straight with you. 389 00:15:19,920 --> 00:15:21,480 I mean, what else do you want? 390 00:15:21,550 --> 00:15:24,890 I want you to apologize to Dave for lying to him. 391 00:15:24,950 --> 00:15:27,090 But it was one little white lie. 392 00:15:27,160 --> 00:15:29,220 Yeah, to one little white guy. 393 00:15:29,290 --> 00:15:31,230 [BOTH LAUGH] 394 00:15:31,290 --> 00:15:34,930 Besides, I don't owe him an apology. 395 00:15:35,000 --> 00:15:37,530 All I wanted to do was work on my truck 396 00:15:37,600 --> 00:15:38,860 and live my life. 397 00:15:38,880 --> 00:15:40,300 But he wouldn't let it go. 398 00:15:40,370 --> 00:15:41,770 Oh, yeah, Pops, you're right. 399 00:15:41,840 --> 00:15:43,100 You the real victim here. 400 00:15:43,170 --> 00:15:45,170 - See? - I was being sarcastic. 401 00:15:45,240 --> 00:15:47,010 I know, but it was working, right? 402 00:15:48,120 --> 00:15:51,110 Listen, I know Dave can be a little extra, 403 00:15:51,120 --> 00:15:53,880 but he's our neighbor, and you are a better man than that. 404 00:15:53,950 --> 00:15:55,320 - Is he? - Not really. 405 00:15:57,060 --> 00:15:59,120 Yes, he is. 406 00:15:59,190 --> 00:16:01,190 Who built the manger for our Christmas pageant? 407 00:16:01,260 --> 00:16:04,460 Who fixed Old Mrs. Kim's transmission for free? 408 00:16:04,530 --> 00:16:06,060 And who held a fundraiser 409 00:16:06,070 --> 00:16:08,430 to fix all the basketball courts in the park? 410 00:16:08,500 --> 00:16:10,760 Okay. Nice try, Tina. 411 00:16:10,830 --> 00:16:12,700 See, I see what you're doing right here. 412 00:16:12,770 --> 00:16:13,859 You're doing that thing 413 00:16:13,860 --> 00:16:15,669 where you try to make me feel bad 414 00:16:15,670 --> 00:16:17,300 for being such a good person. 415 00:16:17,360 --> 00:16:19,320 - It's working, isn't it? - Damn right it is. 416 00:16:19,340 --> 00:16:20,940 Ugh. 417 00:16:26,020 --> 00:16:27,480 Hey, Gemma. 418 00:16:27,550 --> 00:16:28,750 Hey, Calvin. 419 00:16:28,820 --> 00:16:30,120 Is Dave here? 420 00:16:30,190 --> 00:16:31,690 Hold on, let me check. 421 00:16:35,080 --> 00:16:37,390 - He says he's not here. - Okay. 422 00:16:37,460 --> 00:16:38,860 Dave, come on, man. 423 00:16:43,170 --> 00:16:45,970 Calvin. 424 00:16:46,040 --> 00:16:48,999 Look, I shouldn't have done you wrong like that, 425 00:16:49,000 --> 00:16:52,470 so I brought you a real key. 426 00:16:52,540 --> 00:16:54,070 No, I don't want it anymore. 427 00:16:55,820 --> 00:16:57,240 Come on, man, take the key. 428 00:16:57,310 --> 00:16:58,320 I told you I don't want it. 429 00:16:58,340 --> 00:16:59,990 Come on, man, take the key. 430 00:17:00,040 --> 00:17:01,040 - No. - Dave, take it. 431 00:17:01,050 --> 00:17:02,750 - No, thank you. - You know what? 432 00:17:10,930 --> 00:17:13,960 You really trying to outrun me, Calvin? 433 00:17:14,030 --> 00:17:16,500 Yeah. 434 00:17:16,570 --> 00:17:18,700 You're lucky I didn't stretch. 435 00:17:20,400 --> 00:17:22,340 Okay, look, I realize now 436 00:17:22,350 --> 00:17:24,210 that I gave you this key for the wrong reason. 437 00:17:24,270 --> 00:17:25,940 I was trying to force you to be my friend. 438 00:17:26,010 --> 00:17:27,810 Clearly, you're not interested. 439 00:17:27,880 --> 00:17:30,980 [SIGHS] You know, Dave, you seem like a nice guy. 440 00:17:31,050 --> 00:17:33,280 Thank you. 441 00:17:34,680 --> 00:17:37,120 But friendship starts with trust. 442 00:17:37,190 --> 00:17:40,500 And for you, that may come easy, but it doesn't for me. 443 00:17:40,600 --> 00:17:43,520 I mean, only trust people that I have a history with. 444 00:17:43,590 --> 00:17:45,090 And that takes time. 445 00:17:46,600 --> 00:17:49,000 - Okay. - All right. 446 00:17:49,070 --> 00:17:50,500 I hear you. 447 00:17:50,570 --> 00:17:51,660 I understand. 448 00:17:51,680 --> 00:17:52,860 Good. Good. 449 00:17:52,880 --> 00:17:54,920 You want to start to make history right now. 450 00:17:57,070 --> 00:17:59,310 That's not what I meant at all. 451 00:17:59,380 --> 00:18:00,660 Okay. Okay. 452 00:18:00,700 --> 00:18:02,450 I-I've got a good idea. Just hear me out. 453 00:18:02,480 --> 00:18:03,980 It's an old classic we use at work. 454 00:18:04,050 --> 00:18:05,980 It's called a trust fall. 455 00:18:06,050 --> 00:18:07,980 Oh, no. 456 00:18:08,020 --> 00:18:11,000 No. I'm not doing none of that hippy-dippity 457 00:18:11,060 --> 00:18:12,859 hacky sack nonsense. 458 00:18:12,860 --> 00:18:15,140 Calvin, please just give me this. 459 00:18:15,160 --> 00:18:16,520 No. Not feeling it. 460 00:18:16,590 --> 00:18:20,060 Well, maybe what you're feeling... is scared. 461 00:18:20,130 --> 00:18:22,900 [LAUGHS] I'm not scared. 462 00:18:22,970 --> 00:18:24,730 Prove it. 463 00:18:24,800 --> 00:18:26,230 Okay. All right. 464 00:18:26,300 --> 00:18:28,290 If I do this, we'll be done? 465 00:18:28,300 --> 00:18:29,300 I promise. 466 00:18:29,340 --> 00:18:31,110 This is what I get 467 00:18:31,170 --> 00:18:33,040 for being better than everybody else. 468 00:18:33,080 --> 00:18:34,480 Okay, this-this is gonna be great. 469 00:18:34,520 --> 00:18:36,680 Now turn around. 470 00:18:36,750 --> 00:18:38,100 - Okay. You got... turn... all right. - I-I-I got it. 471 00:18:38,110 --> 00:18:40,110 Turn around. Turn around, cross your arms. 472 00:18:40,180 --> 00:18:42,819 - [SIGHING]: All right. - Okay, take a deep breath in. 473 00:18:42,820 --> 00:18:44,420 - [INHALES] - Okay. 474 00:18:44,490 --> 00:18:47,350 And fall back into my arms. 475 00:18:49,780 --> 00:18:52,459 I can't do it, man. I can't do it. 476 00:18:52,460 --> 00:18:54,260 Okay. You're doing great. 477 00:18:54,330 --> 00:18:56,930 - Now fall back into my arms. - Okay. 478 00:18:56,940 --> 00:18:58,570 Stop rushing my trust. 479 00:18:58,630 --> 00:18:59,880 All right? 480 00:18:59,920 --> 00:19:01,440 - I'm-I'm gonna do it. - All right. 481 00:19:01,670 --> 00:19:03,469 All right, I'll do it. 482 00:19:03,470 --> 00:19:05,070 Here we go. 483 00:19:05,140 --> 00:19:07,110 Arms crossed, deep breath. 484 00:19:07,180 --> 00:19:08,980 And, uh... 485 00:19:09,050 --> 00:19:10,910 I'm falling. 486 00:19:10,920 --> 00:19:12,950 - Oh. [CHUCKLES] - You did it. 487 00:19:12,980 --> 00:19:14,420 - Oh, you got me. Okay. - I got you. 488 00:19:14,480 --> 00:19:16,740 - All right. - Okay. Okay. 489 00:19:16,800 --> 00:19:18,600 Okay, now. [GRUNTS] Upsy-daisy. 490 00:19:18,640 --> 00:19:20,200 Yeah. 491 00:19:20,220 --> 00:19:22,460 Nah, Dave, you know, it's like you said. 492 00:19:22,530 --> 00:19:25,830 You know, I'm starting to feel something historical here. 493 00:19:25,900 --> 00:19:27,430 - You know? - [GROANING] 494 00:19:27,500 --> 00:19:29,009 I'm starting to feel something, too, man. 495 00:19:29,010 --> 00:19:31,400 Up we go. 496 00:19:31,470 --> 00:19:33,520 No, you know, get comfortable, Dave. 497 00:19:33,540 --> 00:19:35,216 You know, 'cause it's like I said, you know, 498 00:19:35,240 --> 00:19:36,740 trust takes time. 499 00:19:36,810 --> 00:19:38,240 You know? 500 00:19:38,910 --> 00:19:40,970 So tell me about those lakes again. 501 00:19:41,040 --> 00:19:42,490 - You know, and where you grew up. - [GROANING] 502 00:19:42,510 --> 00:19:43,919 I always wondered about. 503 00:19:43,920 --> 00:19:46,390 I know it's Superior, that's the main one, everybody knows. 504 00:19:46,420 --> 00:19:48,950 - Is Ontario a lake? - Yeah. 505 00:19:49,020 --> 00:19:50,399 How far are you from Eight Mile, 506 00:19:50,400 --> 00:19:52,140 where Eminem grew up? You... ? 507 00:19:53,720 --> 00:19:55,280 Oh, man, this is great. 508 00:19:55,300 --> 00:19:57,760 This is like a Sleep Number bed. It's actually very nice. 509 00:20:02,660 --> 00:20:05,440 [GROANS] 510 00:20:05,450 --> 00:20:07,209 Gemma. 511 00:20:07,210 --> 00:20:10,219 Uh, can you get me another bag of peas for my back? 512 00:20:10,220 --> 00:20:11,949 This one's all mushy. 513 00:20:11,950 --> 00:20:14,019 - I'll bring one right up. - Okay. 514 00:20:14,020 --> 00:20:15,600 And could you bring me some aspirin? 515 00:20:17,080 --> 00:20:19,280 - Sure, honey. - Thanks. 516 00:20:19,480 --> 00:20:22,329 And then maybe a snack. Just... 517 00:20:22,330 --> 00:20:24,680 something salty but not crunchy. 518 00:20:24,730 --> 00:20:26,729 Okay, Dave. 519 00:20:26,730 --> 00:20:28,930 [KNOCKING AT DOOR] 520 00:20:31,760 --> 00:20:32,989 Hey. 521 00:20:32,990 --> 00:20:34,290 Hey, Tina. 522 00:20:34,300 --> 00:20:35,900 I just came to check on Dave. 523 00:20:35,920 --> 00:20:37,059 How's his back? 524 00:20:37,060 --> 00:20:38,060 It's killing me. 525 00:20:38,160 --> 00:20:40,380 Aw. 526 00:20:40,420 --> 00:20:41,599 Well, tell him to feel better. 527 00:20:41,600 --> 00:20:44,440 Oh, and I also wanted to bring you a key to our house. 528 00:20:44,540 --> 00:20:46,240 Are you sure it's okay with Calvin? 529 00:20:46,820 --> 00:20:49,170 [BOTH LAUGH] 530 00:20:50,200 --> 00:20:51,900 Boys are stupid. 531 00:20:51,920 --> 00:20:54,800 - Synced & corrected by MementMori - -- www.addic7ed.com -- 37492

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