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1
00:00:00,420 --> 00:00:02,830
♪♪
2
00:00:04,830 --> 00:00:08,540
[Quill]
Okay. The good news is, we saved
the shrunken Kree home world,
3
00:00:08,540 --> 00:00:11,250
which is expanding back
to its normal size.
4
00:00:11,250 --> 00:00:12,750
[alarm blaring]
The bad news--
5
00:00:12,750 --> 00:00:15,460
[computer]
Self-destruct in two minutes.
6
00:00:15,460 --> 00:00:17,040
...is fairly self-explanatory.
7
00:00:17,040 --> 00:00:19,500
This is it, everyone.
[clicks]
8
00:00:20,670 --> 00:00:22,790
Peter, wait.
Did you see that mirror
9
00:00:22,790 --> 00:00:24,670
in the weapons vault?
You mind, Gamora?
10
00:00:24,670 --> 00:00:26,920
I'm trying to spend
my final moments
in this galaxy
11
00:00:26,920 --> 00:00:28,960
with some mid-'70s
one-hit wonders.
12
00:00:28,960 --> 00:00:31,580
They might not have to be
your final moments.
13
00:00:31,580 --> 00:00:33,290
That mirror
is called the Black Vortex.
14
00:00:33,290 --> 00:00:35,670
Thanos said it was
an indestructible prison.
15
00:00:35,670 --> 00:00:37,790
Drax approves
of indestructible.
16
00:00:37,790 --> 00:00:40,670
Yeah, well, Rocket
don't approve of no prison.
17
00:00:40,670 --> 00:00:41,960
I am Groot.
18
00:00:41,960 --> 00:00:43,580
Good point, bud.
19
00:00:43,580 --> 00:00:45,710
Ain't a prison in the galaxy
I can't escape.
20
00:00:45,710 --> 00:00:49,790
The thing is, this prison
isn't exactly in the galaxy.
21
00:00:55,790 --> 00:00:58,080
[alarm continues blaring]
[Quill]
I don't know, Gamora.
22
00:00:58,080 --> 00:01:00,710
This thing looks,
like, super evil.
23
00:01:07,920 --> 00:01:12,460
Self-destruct in 15 seconds.
Who am I to judge?
24
00:01:12,460 --> 00:01:14,790
Everyone hold hands
so we don't get separated.
25
00:01:17,420 --> 00:01:18,830
I am Groot!
26
00:01:31,330 --> 00:01:33,330
[yelling]
27
00:01:36,250 --> 00:01:38,880
[yelling]
28
00:02:07,330 --> 00:02:09,460
[birds twittering]
29
00:02:15,790 --> 00:02:18,920
[twittering]
[yawns]
30
00:02:18,920 --> 00:02:20,960
Wha-- Where am I?
31
00:02:25,620 --> 00:02:27,040
[bird twittering]
32
00:02:28,960 --> 00:02:30,960
[animals chittering softly]
33
00:02:30,960 --> 00:02:32,710
[twittering]
34
00:02:40,920 --> 00:02:42,880
Good morning, Princess Gamora.
35
00:02:42,880 --> 00:02:44,620
[screams]
36
00:02:44,620 --> 00:02:46,790
[animals clamoring]
37
00:02:46,790 --> 00:02:50,000
Aah!
Oh, the horror!
38
00:02:50,000 --> 00:02:51,380
[sighs]
39
00:03:02,380 --> 00:03:04,670
[birds twittering]
40
00:03:14,170 --> 00:03:15,750
[yells]
41
00:03:15,750 --> 00:03:18,500
Don't be scared,
Princess Gamora.
42
00:03:18,500 --> 00:03:22,170
It's just us friendly
woodland critters.
43
00:03:22,170 --> 00:03:24,540
You can talk?
44
00:03:24,540 --> 00:03:27,540
[laughing]
Of course I can.
45
00:03:27,540 --> 00:03:29,790
Every-birdie here
can talk.
46
00:03:30,830 --> 00:03:32,960
[birds twittering]
47
00:03:33,880 --> 00:03:35,210
Huh?
48
00:03:35,210 --> 00:03:37,330
Ugh!
49
00:03:39,420 --> 00:03:41,420
Groot. Quill!
50
00:03:41,420 --> 00:03:43,920
A quill,
like a feather?
51
00:03:43,920 --> 00:03:46,330
[gasps]
If you need a feather, Princess,
52
00:03:46,330 --> 00:03:48,420
you can have one of mine!
53
00:03:48,420 --> 00:03:51,580
But what's a "Gwoot"?
[giggles]
54
00:03:51,580 --> 00:03:53,750
Groot and Quill
are two of my friends.
55
00:03:53,750 --> 00:03:55,750
They were with me
just a minute ago.
56
00:03:55,750 --> 00:03:58,460
There's no-bunny here but us.
[giggling]
57
00:03:58,460 --> 00:04:02,670
[gasps]
My comm link! And my blade!
Where are they?
58
00:04:02,670 --> 00:04:06,540
Golly, I haven't seen
anything like that around here.
59
00:04:06,540 --> 00:04:08,920
Have you, Lopsy?
Uh-uh.
60
00:04:08,920 --> 00:04:11,330
I need my gear
to find my friends,
so whatever game
61
00:04:11,330 --> 00:04:13,920
you weird creatures
are playing,
I don't have time for it.
62
00:04:13,920 --> 00:04:15,210
Go on! Shoo!
63
00:04:15,210 --> 00:04:17,250
[animals clamoring]
64
00:04:19,250 --> 00:04:21,420
[whimpering]
65
00:04:21,420 --> 00:04:24,040
[sighs]
We're sorry, Princess.
66
00:04:24,040 --> 00:04:26,670
Don't be upset.
67
00:04:26,670 --> 00:04:31,080
Yeah. Bad things happen
when you're not happy, Princess.
68
00:04:31,080 --> 00:04:34,710
You wouldn't like me
when I'm sad.
69
00:04:34,710 --> 00:04:36,710
I know what will perk you up.
70
00:04:36,710 --> 00:04:39,500
Every-birdie knows
you can't go wrong
71
00:04:39,500 --> 00:04:43,120
when you start
your day out with a song!
72
00:04:43,120 --> 00:04:45,580
[animals]
♪ Oh, it's time to sing the-- ♪
73
00:04:45,580 --> 00:04:46,920
No singing, please!
74
00:04:47,920 --> 00:04:50,000
[animals groan]
75
00:04:50,000 --> 00:04:52,040
Look, I'm not whoever
you think I am.
76
00:04:52,040 --> 00:04:55,170
I'm not a princess,
and I definitely do not sing.
77
00:04:55,170 --> 00:04:58,250
Well, of course
you're a princess, silly.
78
00:04:58,250 --> 00:05:01,710
Your father Thanos
ruled a whole planet!
79
00:05:01,710 --> 00:05:04,580
Plus you've got
a wicked stepsister.
80
00:05:04,580 --> 00:05:07,960
And such beautiful
flowing hair.
81
00:05:07,960 --> 00:05:09,420
Really?
82
00:05:09,420 --> 00:05:11,210
No! I don't have time for this.
83
00:05:11,210 --> 00:05:12,880
[animals groan]
84
00:05:12,880 --> 00:05:14,580
You're trying
to distract me.
85
00:05:14,580 --> 00:05:17,080
I have to find my gear
so I can look for my friends.
86
00:05:17,080 --> 00:05:19,170
Maybe if you
cleaned the place up,
87
00:05:19,170 --> 00:05:21,670
you'll find what
you're looking for, Princess.
88
00:05:21,670 --> 00:05:23,620
I don't clean up
after people.
89
00:05:23,620 --> 00:05:26,420
I save the galaxy,
and people clean up after me!
90
00:05:26,420 --> 00:05:30,830
Oh, you'll never
find your things
with that attitude.
91
00:05:30,830 --> 00:05:32,170
Come on, Princess!
92
00:05:32,170 --> 00:05:34,710
Ugh! Fine.
93
00:05:35,830 --> 00:05:38,080
♪♪ [animals whistling]
94
00:05:43,380 --> 00:05:45,420
[groans]
95
00:05:45,420 --> 00:05:48,500
♪ It's time to sing
the whistling song ♪
96
00:05:48,500 --> 00:05:51,080
♪ The whistling song,
the whistling song ♪
97
00:05:51,080 --> 00:05:53,880
♪ When we all pitch in,
it won't take long ♪
[groans]
98
00:05:53,880 --> 00:05:56,000
♪ If we sing
the whistling song ♪
99
00:05:56,000 --> 00:05:57,000
[Gamora approaching]
100
00:06:03,080 --> 00:06:05,710
[animals]
♪ It's time to sing
the whistling song ♪
101
00:06:05,710 --> 00:06:08,170
♪ The whistling song,
the whistling song ♪
102
00:06:08,170 --> 00:06:10,920
♪ When we all pitch in,
it won't take long ♪
103
00:06:10,920 --> 00:06:12,830
♪ If we sing
the whistling song ♪
104
00:06:12,830 --> 00:06:15,710
Why is there so much
talk of whistling
in a song that's all sung?
105
00:06:15,710 --> 00:06:18,170
Don't question it.
Just sing.
106
00:06:18,170 --> 00:06:21,330
You sing to pass the time
while you're working.
107
00:06:21,330 --> 00:06:23,540
And you work
to give you something to do
108
00:06:23,540 --> 00:06:25,620
while you're singing!
[groans]
109
00:06:25,620 --> 00:06:28,580
♪ It's time to sing
the whistling song ♪
110
00:06:28,580 --> 00:06:31,170
♪ The whistling song,
the whistling song ♪
111
00:06:31,170 --> 00:06:33,920
♪ When we all pitch in,
it won't take long ♪
112
00:06:33,920 --> 00:06:36,040
♪ If we sing
the whistling song ♪
113
00:06:36,040 --> 00:06:38,000
I just cleaned that.
114
00:06:38,000 --> 00:06:41,670
And now you get
to clean it again.
Hooray!
115
00:06:43,210 --> 00:06:45,460
♪ It's time to sing
the whistling song ♪
116
00:06:45,460 --> 00:06:48,170
[groans, huffs]
♪ The whistling song,
the whistling song ♪
117
00:06:48,170 --> 00:06:51,170
♪ When we all pitch in,
it won't take long ♪
[gasps]
118
00:06:51,170 --> 00:06:54,170
♪ If we sing
the whistling song ♪
[evil chuckle]
119
00:06:59,750 --> 00:07:02,000
[radio static]
Hmm?
120
00:07:02,000 --> 00:07:03,330
Huh?
121
00:07:03,330 --> 00:07:04,620
[gasps]
Mmm!
122
00:07:04,620 --> 00:07:07,250
Ooh, look what I found.
123
00:07:07,250 --> 00:07:09,210
You vermin
stole my comm link!
[shatters]
124
00:07:09,210 --> 00:07:11,880
[comm link chirps]
Quill! Rocket!
125
00:07:11,880 --> 00:07:14,080
Can anyone read me?
126
00:07:14,080 --> 00:07:17,460
[static over comm link]
127
00:07:17,460 --> 00:07:20,120
Where's my blade?
[whimpering]
128
00:07:20,120 --> 00:07:22,710
Uh, I don't know.
[chuckles]
129
00:07:22,710 --> 00:07:25,210
Maybe if we finish
dusting the armoire--
[squeaks]
130
00:07:25,210 --> 00:07:26,790
I've done enough cleaning.
131
00:07:26,790 --> 00:07:28,790
Blade or no blade,
I'm getting out of here.
132
00:07:30,290 --> 00:07:33,080
A princess can't go out
dressed like that.
133
00:07:35,250 --> 00:07:36,960
[groans]
134
00:07:36,960 --> 00:07:39,670
A princess can dress any way
she krutacking pleases.
135
00:07:39,670 --> 00:07:41,670
But I'm not
that kind of princess!
136
00:07:41,670 --> 00:07:44,750
Come on, Princess!
[chatter, laughter]
137
00:07:47,080 --> 00:07:48,960
[Gamora grunts]
138
00:07:48,960 --> 00:07:50,170
I said no!
139
00:07:50,170 --> 00:07:52,380
[animals gasp]
140
00:07:52,380 --> 00:07:57,000
But-- But we worked
all night on that dress.
141
00:07:57,000 --> 00:07:58,290
[crying]
142
00:07:58,290 --> 00:08:00,790
Stop that. Stop crying.
143
00:08:00,790 --> 00:08:03,790
[crying]
144
00:08:03,790 --> 00:08:08,210
I told ya
you wouldn't like me
when I'm sad.
145
00:08:08,210 --> 00:08:09,880
[crying]
[electricity crackling]
146
00:08:12,460 --> 00:08:14,880
[yelling]
147
00:08:16,250 --> 00:08:19,330
[growling]
148
00:08:23,000 --> 00:08:25,790
[grunts]
Aw, flarg.
149
00:08:27,580 --> 00:08:29,330
[roaring]
150
00:08:29,330 --> 00:08:31,880
[animals roaring]
151
00:08:35,210 --> 00:08:37,620
Look, I don't want to hurt you.
152
00:08:42,620 --> 00:08:44,620
They're not real.
153
00:08:44,620 --> 00:08:47,040
They're not real!
[yells]
[screeching]
154
00:08:47,040 --> 00:08:49,750
[grunting]
155
00:08:49,750 --> 00:08:52,380
[screeching]
156
00:08:52,380 --> 00:08:53,960
[grunts]
157
00:08:53,960 --> 00:08:56,330
[growling]
158
00:08:56,330 --> 00:08:58,330
How many of those things
are there?
159
00:09:01,710 --> 00:09:03,540
[evil bleating]
160
00:09:05,830 --> 00:09:08,040
[hisses]
161
00:09:09,960 --> 00:09:12,420
[hissing]
[screeching]
162
00:09:14,380 --> 00:09:15,540
[yells]
163
00:09:15,540 --> 00:09:17,540
[yelling]
164
00:09:19,540 --> 00:09:23,040
[angry chittering]
165
00:09:24,170 --> 00:09:27,080
[snarling]
166
00:09:27,080 --> 00:09:28,290
Yes!
167
00:09:30,000 --> 00:09:34,170
Every-bunny,
meet the most dangerous
princess in the galaxy.
168
00:09:34,170 --> 00:09:36,250
[screeching, growling]
169
00:09:42,380 --> 00:09:43,790
[growling]
170
00:09:57,880 --> 00:09:59,250
[grunts]
171
00:10:02,790 --> 00:10:03,880
[yells]
172
00:10:05,620 --> 00:10:08,380
Aaahhh!
173
00:10:15,290 --> 00:10:18,290
[angry hissing, chittering]
174
00:10:22,040 --> 00:10:24,040
[animals growling]
[owl screeches]
175
00:10:28,250 --> 00:10:30,040
[clamoring]
176
00:10:34,830 --> 00:10:36,380
[yells]
177
00:10:40,290 --> 00:10:41,380
[squeaks]
178
00:10:43,710 --> 00:10:45,880
[yells]
179
00:11:01,830 --> 00:11:03,960
Well, that was... sparkly.
180
00:11:03,960 --> 00:11:06,380
But I've got friends to find.
181
00:11:06,380 --> 00:11:08,420
♪♪ [whistling
the whistling song tune]
182
00:11:22,000 --> 00:11:24,170
What is this place?
183
00:11:25,580 --> 00:11:29,000
And why am I so uncomfortable?
184
00:11:29,000 --> 00:11:32,210
What sinister horror is this?
Drax does not wear sweaters!
185
00:11:34,040 --> 00:11:36,380
And what has happened
to Groot and the others?
186
00:11:36,380 --> 00:11:38,620
And why do I persist
in talking to myself?
187
00:11:38,620 --> 00:11:40,500
[man]
A hero? Don't make me laugh!
188
00:11:40,500 --> 00:11:43,500
Mark my words,
Drax-Man is up to no good,
189
00:11:43,500 --> 00:11:46,460
or my name's
not J. Jonah J'Son!
190
00:11:46,460 --> 00:11:48,750
Yeah? Well,
same to you... Mom!
191
00:11:48,750 --> 00:11:50,250
[ringer bell on phone dings]
192
00:11:51,460 --> 00:11:54,380
Drax!
Where's my Drax-Man photos?
193
00:11:54,380 --> 00:11:56,380
"Drax-Man"?
194
00:11:56,380 --> 00:11:58,210
Yeah. Drax-Man.
195
00:11:58,210 --> 00:12:00,960
You know, the elusive,
costumed vigilante
196
00:12:00,960 --> 00:12:04,080
who sells my papers
and pays your rent.
197
00:12:04,080 --> 00:12:08,540
I want fresh, new,
incriminating photos
of that bare-chested menace
198
00:12:08,540 --> 00:12:11,080
on my desk by 4:00!
199
00:12:13,500 --> 00:12:16,080
That angry man
resembles Quill's father,
200
00:12:16,080 --> 00:12:21,460
but that is not possible,
for J'Son of Spartax
does not have gray hair.
201
00:12:21,460 --> 00:12:23,920
Also, he is not alive.
202
00:12:23,920 --> 00:12:26,380
Hmm. I suspect that I
203
00:12:26,380 --> 00:12:30,580
am actually the costumed
adventurer Drax-Man.
[narrator] No one suspects
204
00:12:30,580 --> 00:12:33,330
that mild-mannered
photographer Drax is actually
205
00:12:33,330 --> 00:12:37,080
the costumed adventurer
Drax-Man.
Who said that?
206
00:12:37,080 --> 00:12:39,580
The mystery of his
amazing double-identity
207
00:12:39,580 --> 00:12:41,920
was revealed
in issue number 32,
208
00:12:41,920 --> 00:12:44,920
"The Secret Origin
of Drax-Man!"
[squawks]
209
00:12:44,920 --> 00:12:46,880
I was just in an office.
210
00:12:46,880 --> 00:12:49,290
How did I come to be
in this vehicle?
211
00:12:49,290 --> 00:12:52,540
Real estate agent/saxophone
enthusiast Arthur Douglas
212
00:12:52,540 --> 00:12:55,120
was driving home to Burbank
from a concert in Las Vegas.
213
00:12:55,120 --> 00:12:59,250
I do not recall this.
Nor do I know the meaning
of half of those words.
214
00:12:59,250 --> 00:13:01,710
Suddenly, an alien
spacecraft appeared,
215
00:13:01,710 --> 00:13:04,790
piloted by
the Mad Titan Thanos.
216
00:13:04,790 --> 00:13:06,250
[growls]
217
00:13:06,250 --> 00:13:08,500
Thanos attacked...
218
00:13:09,500 --> 00:13:11,290
destroying the vehicle,
219
00:13:11,290 --> 00:13:14,620
[evil laughter]
laughing evilly the whole time.
220
00:13:14,620 --> 00:13:17,500
[evil laughter]
221
00:13:17,500 --> 00:13:20,710
Although he was thrown clear
of the explosion,
222
00:13:20,710 --> 00:13:23,920
Douglas was badly injured
and barely alive.
223
00:13:23,920 --> 00:13:27,460
This never happened.
Stop breaking the fourth wall.
224
00:13:27,460 --> 00:13:31,040
I see no wall to break here,
let alone four walls.
225
00:13:31,040 --> 00:13:32,290
[groans]
226
00:13:32,290 --> 00:13:34,460
As I was saying,
227
00:13:34,460 --> 00:13:37,830
his astral form was pulled
from his physical body
228
00:13:37,830 --> 00:13:40,710
and instantly transported
across the galaxy.
229
00:13:46,040 --> 00:13:48,920
This story seems extremely
far-fetched and confusing.
230
00:13:51,380 --> 00:13:55,540
The Eternal Being Kronos
gave Douglas
a powerful new body,
231
00:13:55,540 --> 00:13:58,670
transforming him into
the living weapon of vengeance
232
00:13:58,670 --> 00:14:01,080
known as Drax-Man.
233
00:14:01,080 --> 00:14:04,330
[yells, grunts]
234
00:14:04,330 --> 00:14:06,620
How did I get back here?
235
00:14:06,620 --> 00:14:10,580
And why do I feel
a tingling sensation?
Why is the world all blurry?
236
00:14:10,580 --> 00:14:13,960
Without warning,
Drax-Man's Drax-sense
starts tingling,
237
00:14:13,960 --> 00:14:17,580
alerting him
that an innocent life
is in danger somewhere nearby.
238
00:14:17,580 --> 00:14:20,620
Ah, that would explain it.
239
00:14:20,620 --> 00:14:22,460
[gasps]
240
00:14:23,460 --> 00:14:24,880
Drax-Man!
241
00:14:24,880 --> 00:14:27,500
Drax-Man is in the building!
Somebody get a camera!
242
00:14:31,670 --> 00:14:35,000
Don't just stand there, Drax!
Drax-Man is in the building!
243
00:14:35,000 --> 00:14:38,880
Go get me those photos!
Do I have to do
everything myself?
244
00:14:40,670 --> 00:14:44,420
Drax-Man. Great Caesar's ghost,
he appeared out of thin air.
245
00:14:44,420 --> 00:14:48,080
Security! Security!
246
00:14:48,080 --> 00:14:51,000
Security!
For crying out loud, Drax!
247
00:14:51,000 --> 00:14:54,500
Drax-Man shows up here twice,
and you don't get
a single picture?
248
00:14:54,500 --> 00:14:56,540
You're fired!
[echoing]
249
00:14:56,540 --> 00:14:59,620
Suddenly remembering that
someone is still in danger,
250
00:14:59,620 --> 00:15:02,830
Drax ducks
into a supply closet.
251
00:15:02,830 --> 00:15:06,750
Uh, Drax ducks
into a supply closet.
252
00:15:06,750 --> 00:15:09,540
For a disembodied voice,
you are very demanding.
253
00:15:11,380 --> 00:15:13,920
Without a moment to spare,
254
00:15:13,920 --> 00:15:16,380
Drax transforms
into the incredible Drax-Man...
255
00:15:18,170 --> 00:15:19,380
[sniffs]
256
00:15:19,380 --> 00:15:21,880
and springs into action.
257
00:15:21,880 --> 00:15:24,170
Too late.
Drax-Man remembers
258
00:15:24,170 --> 00:15:26,170
that he cannot fly.
259
00:15:27,500 --> 00:15:28,960
[clattering]
260
00:15:33,380 --> 00:15:35,790
[groans]
[car alarm blaring]
261
00:15:35,790 --> 00:15:37,790
You could've
mentioned that earlier.
262
00:15:37,790 --> 00:15:40,380
[woman]
Help! Someone, please, help!
263
00:15:40,380 --> 00:15:45,170
Give it up, lady.
This is a robbery,
not a tug o' war.
264
00:15:45,170 --> 00:15:46,620
[grunts, groans]
265
00:15:46,620 --> 00:15:49,580
Oh, thank you, Drax-Man!
266
00:15:49,580 --> 00:15:53,580
You're a genuine hero,
no matter what
J. Jonah J'Son says.
267
00:15:53,580 --> 00:15:57,790
Justice served, Drax-Man
basks in the adulation
[fans cheering]
268
00:15:57,790 --> 00:16:01,000
of his grateful
but hastily drawn fans.
269
00:16:02,040 --> 00:16:05,210
[cheering, shouting]
270
00:16:05,210 --> 00:16:07,880
This feels pleasant
and very appropriate.
271
00:16:07,880 --> 00:16:09,880
[Gamora on comm link]
Drax, is that you?
272
00:16:09,880 --> 00:16:12,250
Gamora, I can barely hear you.
273
00:16:12,250 --> 00:16:14,790
I can't reach the others.
Something is blocking
our comms.
274
00:16:14,790 --> 00:16:16,460
[narrator]
Unknown to Drax-Man,
275
00:16:16,460 --> 00:16:19,120
Gamora is secretly
his arch-nemesis.
276
00:16:19,120 --> 00:16:22,040
Every word she said to him
was a lie.
277
00:16:22,040 --> 00:16:24,710
[handcuffs clink]
Not true.
Gamora is my friend.
278
00:16:24,710 --> 00:16:27,290
Drax only believes Gamora
is his friend
279
00:16:27,290 --> 00:16:30,790
because his memory was erased
back in issue number 219.
280
00:16:30,790 --> 00:16:32,790
I do not remember that!
281
00:16:32,790 --> 00:16:34,330
What did I just say?
282
00:16:34,330 --> 00:16:36,120
[Gamora]
Drax, listen. You're in danger.
283
00:16:36,120 --> 00:16:38,710
Wherever you are,
get out of there!
284
00:16:38,710 --> 00:16:41,670
[narrator]
Is exactly the sort of thing
a lying arch-nemesis
285
00:16:41,670 --> 00:16:43,790
would tell our noble hero.
286
00:16:43,790 --> 00:16:45,920
Gamora, I do not understand.
287
00:16:45,920 --> 00:16:47,540
[Gamora]
Run!
288
00:16:47,540 --> 00:16:49,250
That I understand.
289
00:16:55,540 --> 00:16:56,580
[thud]
290
00:17:05,790 --> 00:17:08,670
Ah, this must be
the fourth wall
you mentioned earlier,
291
00:17:08,670 --> 00:17:10,500
and yet Drax
did not break it.
292
00:17:10,500 --> 00:17:14,500
[narrator]
Tricked by his sinister
arch-nemesis Gamora,
293
00:17:14,500 --> 00:17:18,620
Drax-Man is trapped
and faces certain doom.
294
00:17:18,620 --> 00:17:21,960
It appears this fourth wall
is about to break Drax!
295
00:17:26,080 --> 00:17:29,830
Drax will break the fourth wall
before the fourth wall
breaks Drax!
296
00:17:32,290 --> 00:17:35,250
[narrator]
Desperate to escape his fate,
297
00:17:35,250 --> 00:17:38,790
Drax-Man lands himself
in even deeper jeopardy.
298
00:17:38,790 --> 00:17:40,670
He's part of
a balanced breakfast.
299
00:17:40,670 --> 00:17:44,000
But can Drax-Man stay crunchy?
300
00:17:44,000 --> 00:17:46,500
But Drax does not wish
to stay crunchy.
301
00:17:46,500 --> 00:17:48,620
This does not even make sense.
302
00:17:51,000 --> 00:17:52,880
[roars]
303
00:17:52,880 --> 00:17:55,080
[Gamora on comm link]
Drax, where are you?
304
00:17:55,080 --> 00:17:57,210
I am facing down
a very flimsy monster...
305
00:17:57,210 --> 00:17:58,500
[roars]
306
00:18:00,830 --> 00:18:02,830
a child with poor eyesight...
307
00:18:07,500 --> 00:18:09,790
and a puny bookseller.
308
00:18:09,790 --> 00:18:11,540
[machinery whirring]
309
00:18:11,540 --> 00:18:15,120
This place is becoming
very irritating.
310
00:18:15,120 --> 00:18:16,880
[Gamora]
Easy, Drax.
311
00:18:16,880 --> 00:18:20,210
We have to find a way
out of... wherever you are.
312
00:18:20,210 --> 00:18:22,500
Tell me what you see.
313
00:18:24,000 --> 00:18:26,670
The machine is printing up
copies of a common thief
314
00:18:26,670 --> 00:18:28,330
I defeated earlier.
315
00:18:28,330 --> 00:18:30,040
[narrator]
That's no common thief.
316
00:18:30,040 --> 00:18:31,830
It's the duplicate desperado
317
00:18:31,830 --> 00:18:34,380
known as Print-Press Paul.
318
00:18:34,380 --> 00:18:35,960
That is a terrible name.
319
00:18:35,960 --> 00:18:40,540
Oh, like "Drax-Man"
is so great?
320
00:18:40,540 --> 00:18:42,580
[yelling]
[sneers]
321
00:18:46,960 --> 00:18:48,000
Get him, boys!
322
00:18:54,330 --> 00:18:56,000
[grunts]
323
00:18:57,120 --> 00:19:00,170
Yes!
[charging yell]
324
00:19:00,170 --> 00:19:04,210
Drax shall fold, spindle,
and staple all who oppose him!
325
00:19:06,670 --> 00:19:09,750
But no matter how many
Drax-Man defeats,
326
00:19:09,750 --> 00:19:11,920
the printing press
keeps printing more.
327
00:19:11,920 --> 00:19:13,710
That does not seem fair.
328
00:19:15,710 --> 00:19:19,000
Your villainous machine
cannot print without ink.
329
00:19:19,000 --> 00:19:20,040
[grunts]
Aah!
330
00:19:21,960 --> 00:19:24,670
[all whimpering]
331
00:19:24,670 --> 00:19:27,250
I'm melting!
332
00:19:27,250 --> 00:19:30,120
[all yelling]
333
00:19:30,120 --> 00:19:31,960
What a world!
334
00:19:31,960 --> 00:19:33,880
Ha! I have beaten you
335
00:19:33,880 --> 00:19:36,540
at your own game,
colorful miscreants.
336
00:19:39,170 --> 00:19:42,380
It is possible I did not
think this through carefully.
337
00:19:42,380 --> 00:19:45,290
[all yell]
338
00:19:47,460 --> 00:19:50,080
The branch!
[whimpering]
339
00:19:50,080 --> 00:19:53,000
[Gamora] Drax? Drax,
what's happening now?
[grunts]
340
00:19:53,000 --> 00:19:56,420
Drax is defeating his foes...
with the power of art!
341
00:19:56,420 --> 00:19:58,210
[narrator]
As the ink level rises,
342
00:19:58,210 --> 00:20:02,880
the all-consuming deluge
splashes onto Drax-Man.
343
00:20:02,880 --> 00:20:05,620
Your clever words
cannot defeat Drax the Inker,
344
00:20:05,620 --> 00:20:09,000
for the pen is mightier
than the sword!
345
00:20:09,000 --> 00:20:12,210
[laughing]
[Gamora] Wait, Drax.
Was that a metaphor?
346
00:20:12,210 --> 00:20:14,500
[narrator]
Drax is safe for the moment,
347
00:20:14,500 --> 00:20:16,920
but the rising ink
carries him ever closer
348
00:20:16,920 --> 00:20:19,710
to the razor-sharp high-speed
fans in the ceiling.
349
00:20:19,710 --> 00:20:23,620
Uh, what's that
supposed to be?
It is a blaster.
350
00:20:25,170 --> 00:20:28,000
Hey, Picasso,
don't quit your day job.
351
00:20:28,000 --> 00:20:30,170
You will not defeat me,
disembodied voice.
352
00:20:30,170 --> 00:20:32,210
I will use this magical branch
353
00:20:32,210 --> 00:20:34,960
to paint something
that will silence you for good.
354
00:20:34,960 --> 00:20:37,040
[Gamora]
Drax, did you say you have
a magical branch
355
00:20:37,040 --> 00:20:39,080
that can paint
anything you want?
356
00:20:39,080 --> 00:20:42,000
Yes. But I cannot seem to paint
a serviceable weapon.
357
00:20:42,000 --> 00:20:45,580
Then don't paint a weapon.
Paint a door
and get out of there!
358
00:20:45,580 --> 00:20:47,580
I would've thought of that,
eventually.
359
00:20:47,580 --> 00:20:51,000
[narrator]
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Drax. Drax. Drax-Man. Buddy.
360
00:20:51,000 --> 00:20:52,790
Doesn't have to end like this.
361
00:20:52,790 --> 00:20:56,250
If you stay here, this world
could be your plaything.
362
00:20:56,250 --> 00:21:00,000
Think about it.
Why would you leave a world
363
00:21:00,000 --> 00:21:03,880
where you can paint anything
your heart desires?
364
00:21:03,880 --> 00:21:06,620
What my heart desires
is my friends,
365
00:21:06,620 --> 00:21:08,920
and a way out
of this unpleasant place.
366
00:21:08,920 --> 00:21:12,670
So I will be leaving now,
and doing my own narration.
367
00:21:12,670 --> 00:21:15,710
[paint squelching]
368
00:21:19,500 --> 00:21:22,920
[yells]
369
00:21:25,580 --> 00:21:29,500
[Drax narrating]
And so, Drax the Inker defeats
the annoying disembodied voice,
370
00:21:29,500 --> 00:21:34,170
takes control of his destiny,
and sets off
for new adventures.
371
00:21:34,170 --> 00:21:36,040
To be continued.
25669
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