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1
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♪♪
2
00:00:12,751 --> 00:00:15,624
MEREDITH: Our genes, which we
inherit from our parents,
3
00:00:15,667 --> 00:00:17,452
determine who we are
biologically.
4
00:00:19,106 --> 00:00:20,542
Just a heads-up --
the owner of the cabin
5
00:00:20,585 --> 00:00:22,413
has a very strict
no-phones policy,
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00:00:22,457 --> 00:00:24,024
except in emergencies.
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I wouldn't want
to upset the owner.
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[ Chuckles ]
No, you wouldn't.
[ Chuckles ] Right?
9
00:00:28,854 --> 00:00:30,204
Wow.
10
00:00:30,247 --> 00:00:32,206
It's more amazing
than you described.
11
00:00:32,249 --> 00:00:33,990
Well, the porch railing's
a little loose,
12
00:00:34,034 --> 00:00:35,296
and, you know, bears.
13
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But they're not inside,
so...
14
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Okay. Hmm.
15
00:00:39,517 --> 00:00:40,475
Our blueprint.
16
00:00:40,518 --> 00:00:42,520
♪♪
17
00:00:42,564 --> 00:00:45,219
Sorry, it's just
one last e-mail to Amelia
18
00:00:45,262 --> 00:00:46,742
about the FDA.
19
00:00:46,785 --> 00:00:48,787
And then you'll be done
changing the world?
Yes.
20
00:00:48,831 --> 00:00:50,093
[ Cellphone swishes ]
Done.
21
00:00:50,137 --> 00:00:51,355
[ Chuckles ]
22
00:00:51,399 --> 00:00:52,356
Ready?
Yeah.
23
00:00:52,400 --> 00:00:53,488
Let's go.
24
00:00:55,098 --> 00:00:56,056
MAN OVER PA:
Paging Dr. Hamilton
25
00:00:56,099 --> 00:00:57,405
to the Grey Center.
26
00:00:57,448 --> 00:00:59,407
Dr. Hamilton
to the Grey Center.
27
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MEREDITH: Everything from
our eye color to our height.
28
00:01:02,540 --> 00:01:04,629
Even our laugh.
29
00:01:04,673 --> 00:01:06,283
But, also, our diseases.
30
00:01:06,327 --> 00:01:07,937
Did I miss
the party invite?
31
00:01:07,980 --> 00:01:10,679
A very expensive
experiment succeeded,
32
00:01:10,722 --> 00:01:13,508
which means more money,
more people.
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00:01:13,551 --> 00:01:15,249
More toys.
Is this a new 3D b--
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Don't.
I know.
Don't touch it.
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00:01:16,946 --> 00:01:18,687
Did you see
Meredith's notes?
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00:01:18,730 --> 00:01:20,515
She said we could
finish the report.
37
00:01:20,558 --> 00:01:23,083
Asthma, diabetes, cancers.
38
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And be done with all this?
39
00:01:28,349 --> 00:01:32,135
But who you are at your core
goes way beyond genes.
40
00:01:32,179 --> 00:01:35,312
98, 99, 100!
41
00:01:35,356 --> 00:01:38,141
Ready or not, here I come.
So, the sun is actually white?
42
00:01:38,185 --> 00:01:40,187
Yeah. Weird, huh?
Yeah.
43
00:01:40,230 --> 00:01:42,580
And it's not even the biggest star.
Is that true, Aunt Maggie?
44
00:01:43,320 --> 00:01:44,800
Huh?
45
00:01:44,843 --> 00:01:45,975
I'm so sorry.
What was it?
46
00:01:46,018 --> 00:01:47,890
What -- Ask me again.
47
00:01:47,933 --> 00:01:49,544
Well, I think you should
go lay down.
48
00:01:49,587 --> 00:01:50,545
No. No.
49
00:01:50,588 --> 00:01:51,763
I took the flu medication.
50
00:01:51,807 --> 00:01:52,808
I'm gonna rally,
51
00:01:52,851 --> 00:01:54,244
and I'm gonna help
with the kids.
52
00:01:54,288 --> 00:01:56,594
Well, you know I used to be
a camp counselor, right?
53
00:01:56,638 --> 00:02:00,337
I know CPR, and I've seen
every Marvel movie.
54
00:02:00,381 --> 00:02:03,210
And, you know,
the whole surgeon thing.
55
00:02:03,253 --> 00:02:05,299
It's just it requires
a different kind of training.
56
00:02:05,342 --> 00:02:06,604
I'll be fine.
57
00:02:06,648 --> 00:02:07,736
Let's just get you
upstairs and --
58
00:02:07,779 --> 00:02:09,172
I can't find Ellis.
59
00:02:10,086 --> 00:02:11,827
[ Sighs ]
Oh, God.
60
00:02:11,870 --> 00:02:13,611
Yeah, okay.
Here we go.
61
00:02:15,222 --> 00:02:16,527
Here we go.
62
00:02:20,314 --> 00:02:21,706
[ Chuckles ]
63
00:02:23,708 --> 00:02:26,581
You're rewriting your report
in your head, aren't you?
64
00:02:26,624 --> 00:02:31,238
I am still stuck on the part
where we explained
65
00:02:31,281 --> 00:02:33,979
why we chose to break up
the injection into four parts.
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00:02:34,023 --> 00:02:35,546
Mm.
67
00:02:35,590 --> 00:02:36,591
When you work
on something like that,
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00:02:36,634 --> 00:02:38,027
it invades your thoughts.
69
00:02:38,070 --> 00:02:40,160
It i-invades your dreams,
everything.
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00:02:40,203 --> 00:02:41,161
It's weird.
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00:02:41,204 --> 00:02:42,553
Two weeks ago,
I wrote out
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00:02:42,597 --> 00:02:44,947
a cellular calculation
on Zola's homework.
73
00:02:44,990 --> 00:02:46,557
Well, think how smart
she looked.
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00:02:46,601 --> 00:02:48,037
It was a history assignment.
Oh.
75
00:02:48,080 --> 00:02:49,473
About 15 years ago,
76
00:02:49,517 --> 00:02:51,258
I got involved in a study
on liver transplants
77
00:02:51,301 --> 00:02:53,564
with HIV-positive donors
and recipients,
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00:02:53,608 --> 00:02:54,826
and it was a lot
of ups and downs
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00:02:54,870 --> 00:02:56,567
and flying
all over the country.
80
00:02:56,611 --> 00:02:58,352
And I wanted to be able
to turn my brain off
81
00:02:58,395 --> 00:03:01,659
every once in a while,
so...cabin.
82
00:03:01,703 --> 00:03:03,879
It was the first big purchase
I made just for me.
83
00:03:03,922 --> 00:03:05,272
Did it work,
to shut your brain off?
84
00:03:05,315 --> 00:03:06,447
The first few times
I came up here,
85
00:03:06,490 --> 00:03:08,275
I got a little stir crazy.
86
00:03:08,318 --> 00:03:10,146
Because there were no lives to save.
Not a single one.
87
00:03:10,190 --> 00:03:11,495
So, I had to settle
into the calm.
88
00:03:11,539 --> 00:03:13,541
[ Laughs ]
89
00:03:13,584 --> 00:03:15,107
Oh. What's that like?
90
00:03:15,151 --> 00:03:16,239
Takes some getting used to.
91
00:03:16,283 --> 00:03:17,893
[ Laughs ]
92
00:03:21,462 --> 00:03:23,812
You're not very good
at this, are you?
[ Laughs ]
93
00:03:23,855 --> 00:03:25,683
No. [ Sniffles ]
94
00:03:26,293 --> 00:03:27,729
♪♪
95
00:03:27,772 --> 00:03:30,340
Come here.
[ Chuckles ]
96
00:03:30,384 --> 00:03:31,733
[ Glass taps lightly ]
97
00:03:31,776 --> 00:03:41,743
♪♪
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♪♪
99
00:03:47,009 --> 00:03:48,619
I think we need to re-work
the way we tackle
100
00:03:48,663 --> 00:03:50,578
David's bowel obstruction.
101
00:03:50,621 --> 00:03:52,971
It reads like he was
intentionally trying to hide it.
Didn't he?
102
00:03:53,015 --> 00:03:55,452
Maybe, but he's already been
accused of pay-to-play.
103
00:03:55,496 --> 00:03:57,062
Putting entire
responsibility on him
104
00:03:57,106 --> 00:03:58,325
would further
discredit him,
105
00:03:58,368 --> 00:03:59,674
just as he's looking
to widen the project.
106
00:03:59,717 --> 00:04:00,675
So we should
take the blame?
107
00:04:00,718 --> 00:04:02,111
I didn't say that, either.
108
00:04:02,154 --> 00:04:04,113
Hamilton's
primary care physician
109
00:04:04,156 --> 00:04:05,506
had examined
and cleared him,
110
00:04:05,549 --> 00:04:07,595
and he reported feeling fine
that morning.
111
00:04:07,638 --> 00:04:09,727
Patients with Parkinson's
are at risk
112
00:04:09,771 --> 00:04:11,512
for other
health conditions.
113
00:04:11,555 --> 00:04:13,078
Maybe we could have done more
on our end.
114
00:04:13,122 --> 00:04:15,037
Hamilton almost cost us
that entire surgery.
115
00:04:15,080 --> 00:04:16,430
Why would we lie?
We're not.
116
00:04:16,473 --> 00:04:19,128
But the goal is to further
Parkinson's research.
117
00:04:19,171 --> 00:04:20,390
Do you have to do that?
118
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Walk?
Pace.
119
00:04:23,872 --> 00:04:26,004
Fine, okay --
an argument could be made
120
00:04:26,048 --> 00:04:28,006
that due to the extreme
motivation of patients
121
00:04:28,050 --> 00:04:30,182
who are seeking
this experimental surgery,
122
00:04:30,226 --> 00:04:32,402
it requires more in-depth
history and physical pre-op.
123
00:04:32,446 --> 00:04:34,578
Right, okay.
Let's frame it like that.
124
00:04:34,622 --> 00:04:36,841
Thorough history-taking
and rigorous testing
125
00:04:36,885 --> 00:04:38,495
should be considered
before performing the surgery
126
00:04:38,539 --> 00:04:39,757
moving forward.
127
00:04:39,801 --> 00:04:40,584
Yeah, it doesn't
point fingers,
128
00:04:40,628 --> 00:04:42,325
and it focuses on outcomes.
129
00:04:42,369 --> 00:04:43,935
And it provides value
to future surgeries.
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00:04:43,979 --> 00:04:44,849
Mm-hmm.
131
00:04:46,590 --> 00:04:48,200
Pacing works.
132
00:04:53,293 --> 00:04:54,990
[ Sighs ]
133
00:04:55,033 --> 00:04:56,470
So, are we ready
to submit this?
134
00:04:56,513 --> 00:04:58,472
I think we are.
135
00:04:58,515 --> 00:05:00,952
Okay, we are...
136
00:05:00,996 --> 00:05:01,779
done.
137
00:05:04,391 --> 00:05:05,957
We are.
138
00:05:06,001 --> 00:05:09,047
My flight doesn't leave
until tomorrow morning.
139
00:05:09,091 --> 00:05:12,007
Or I could change it...
140
00:05:12,050 --> 00:05:13,095
to today.
141
00:05:13,138 --> 00:05:14,139
Or you could stay.
142
00:05:14,183 --> 00:05:15,358
You wanna come to a show?
143
00:05:26,021 --> 00:05:28,545
[ Door opens ]
144
00:05:28,589 --> 00:05:30,025
What the --
Uncle Nick!
145
00:05:30,068 --> 00:05:31,722
Charlotte! What --
What are you doing here?
146
00:05:31,766 --> 00:05:34,725
Clearly,
we had the same idea.
147
00:05:36,640 --> 00:05:38,033
[ Chuckling ]
Can you give me a minute?
148
00:05:39,339 --> 00:05:40,557
Just a minute.
149
00:05:41,515 --> 00:05:43,168
♪♪
150
00:05:43,212 --> 00:05:45,083
[ Laughs ]
151
00:05:45,127 --> 00:05:46,346
Sorry.
152
00:05:46,389 --> 00:05:49,131
Ellis!
Ellis?
153
00:05:49,174 --> 00:05:50,741
[ Door closes ]
Where is that girl?
154
00:05:50,785 --> 00:05:52,439
Well, she's not
in the bathroom.
155
00:05:52,482 --> 00:05:54,266
Ugh, God.
Are you okay?
156
00:05:54,310 --> 00:05:56,921
My sinuses have just turned
into a vise around my brain.
157
00:05:56,965 --> 00:05:58,401
[ Sighs ]
158
00:05:58,445 --> 00:06:00,838
Hey, doesn't she love
to hide in her closet?
159
00:06:00,882 --> 00:06:03,014
I checked.
She's not there.
Ellis!
160
00:06:03,058 --> 00:06:05,234
How am I gonna tell Meredith
I lost one of her kids?
161
00:06:05,277 --> 00:06:07,062
We didn't lose her --
we just don't know where she is.
162
00:06:07,105 --> 00:06:08,063
Ellis!
163
00:06:08,106 --> 00:06:09,456
I can just hear
Meredith now.
164
00:06:09,499 --> 00:06:11,675
"I always knew
it was gonna be you."
165
00:06:11,719 --> 00:06:14,156
I found her!
Oop.
166
00:06:14,199 --> 00:06:15,113
Mm. Mm.
167
00:06:16,724 --> 00:06:17,986
Here I come.
168
00:06:21,381 --> 00:06:22,556
Are you okay?
169
00:06:22,599 --> 00:06:23,905
Did I win?
170
00:06:23,948 --> 00:06:25,123
[ Laughs ]
Yeah, you sure did.
171
00:06:25,167 --> 00:06:27,082
Let's play again.
No, let's not.
172
00:06:27,125 --> 00:06:30,128
Why don't you two go get
a juice box, all right?
173
00:06:30,172 --> 00:06:32,957
And I'll be right there
in a second.
174
00:06:33,001 --> 00:06:34,437
Ugh...
[ Sighs ]
175
00:06:34,481 --> 00:06:35,917
Hey, let me handle it.
Mm.
176
00:06:35,960 --> 00:06:38,136
All right? You rest.
177
00:06:38,180 --> 00:06:40,138
Look how level-headed I was
during all that.
178
00:06:40,182 --> 00:06:41,139
[ Both laugh ]
179
00:06:41,183 --> 00:06:42,750
What is this?
180
00:06:45,361 --> 00:06:46,580
[ Sighs ]
181
00:06:49,800 --> 00:06:52,673
Oh, this looks like
some of Ellis' old stuff.
182
00:06:52,716 --> 00:06:55,502
I thought Meredith had all
of this stuff put in storage.
183
00:06:55,545 --> 00:06:57,155
Can I keep this?
184
00:06:57,199 --> 00:06:58,330
I don't see why not.
185
00:06:58,374 --> 00:07:00,115
I mean,
we can ask your mom.
186
00:07:00,158 --> 00:07:01,899
[ Gasps ] Wow.
187
00:07:03,161 --> 00:07:05,294
Wow.
188
00:07:05,337 --> 00:07:07,339
Is this for you,
Aunt Maggie?
189
00:07:07,383 --> 00:07:14,608
♪♪
190
00:07:14,651 --> 00:07:15,826
[ Breathes sharply ]
191
00:07:15,870 --> 00:07:20,918
♪♪
192
00:07:39,284 --> 00:07:41,896
Hi.
CHARLOTTE: Hey. [ Laughs ]
193
00:07:42,940 --> 00:07:44,986
Okay, let's try this again.
194
00:07:45,029 --> 00:07:46,509
Uh, Meredith,
this is my niece, Charlotte.
195
00:07:46,553 --> 00:07:49,033
Charlotte, this is Dr. Meredith Grey.
Hi, Charlotte.
196
00:07:49,077 --> 00:07:50,557
It's really nice
to meet you.
197
00:07:50,600 --> 00:07:51,949
He talks about you
all the time.
198
00:07:51,993 --> 00:07:53,908
Aww.
Wait, Dr. Grey?
199
00:07:53,951 --> 00:07:55,562
As in the -- the surgeon
that saved your kidney?
200
00:07:55,605 --> 00:07:57,520
Life.
But, yes, same one.
201
00:07:57,564 --> 00:07:59,217
You forgot to mention
that she's your girlfriend.
202
00:07:59,261 --> 00:08:00,915
Well, I wanted to properly
introduce you two.
203
00:08:00,958 --> 00:08:02,699
Well, that was definitely
an introduction.
204
00:08:02,743 --> 00:08:05,006
[ Chuckles ]
And, um, are you supposed
205
00:08:05,049 --> 00:08:06,181
to be dating your patients?
206
00:08:06,224 --> 00:08:08,139
He's not my patient anymore,
so it's fine.
207
00:08:08,183 --> 00:08:11,403
Who's this?
Oh, uh, this is Silver.
208
00:08:11,447 --> 00:08:13,449
Silver? Okay.
Nice to meet you.
209
00:08:13,493 --> 00:08:14,929
You guys, uh, friends,
or...
210
00:08:14,972 --> 00:08:16,539
More like soul mates.
"Soul mates"?
211
00:08:16,583 --> 00:08:18,106
It's like we've known
each other lifetimes.
212
00:08:18,149 --> 00:08:19,194
Eras.
213
00:08:19,237 --> 00:08:21,501
♪♪
214
00:08:21,544 --> 00:08:22,850
Long time.
215
00:08:22,893 --> 00:08:24,025
Pretty far away from school.
216
00:08:24,068 --> 00:08:25,200
You know, mid-terms.
217
00:08:25,243 --> 00:08:26,854
I'm starving.
218
00:08:26,897 --> 00:08:28,551
I saw steak.
I can eat.
219
00:08:28,595 --> 00:08:32,642
♪♪
220
00:08:32,686 --> 00:08:34,252
Let's eat.
Let's eat.
221
00:08:34,296 --> 00:08:36,994
♪♪
222
00:08:37,908 --> 00:08:39,431
Are you gonna open it?
223
00:08:39,475 --> 00:08:41,521
Well, it could be
for another Margaret.
224
00:08:46,656 --> 00:08:49,920
You know,
after my mom died...
225
00:08:49,964 --> 00:08:52,575
there was a fire
in my grandmother's house,
226
00:08:52,619 --> 00:08:54,446
and it burned up
a good part of it,
227
00:08:54,490 --> 00:08:56,579
including the bedroom
where my brother and I kept
228
00:08:56,623 --> 00:08:58,712
a lot of our stuff
in storage.
229
00:08:58,755 --> 00:09:01,192
I lost a lot
of pictures and books,
230
00:09:01,236 --> 00:09:03,325
and I lost
the last birthday card
231
00:09:03,368 --> 00:09:04,892
my mom had given me.
232
00:09:07,547 --> 00:09:08,722
I was devastated.
233
00:09:11,159 --> 00:09:14,728
And to this day,
I still dream about...
234
00:09:14,771 --> 00:09:16,643
seeing her handwriting again.
235
00:09:18,601 --> 00:09:20,168
You don't even
have to read it,
236
00:09:20,211 --> 00:09:21,778
but it's nice
that you have it.
237
00:09:21,822 --> 00:09:27,479
♪♪
238
00:09:27,523 --> 00:09:28,959
♪ When I think of you,
I don't know what to do ♪
239
00:09:29,003 --> 00:09:30,439
Do you want a soda?
240
00:09:30,482 --> 00:09:32,006
A water?
241
00:09:32,049 --> 00:09:34,791
I would love
a ginger ale.
242
00:09:34,835 --> 00:09:37,402
Can I get a ginger ale
and Coke, please?
243
00:09:37,446 --> 00:09:38,621
[ Chuckles ]
244
00:09:38,665 --> 00:09:40,797
I spent a lot of time
in places like this
245
00:09:40,841 --> 00:09:42,190
when I was younger.
[ Chuckles ]
246
00:09:42,233 --> 00:09:43,887
What was that Amelia like?
Lucky to have survived.
247
00:09:43,931 --> 00:09:45,280
High most of the time.
248
00:09:45,323 --> 00:09:48,022
Doing things she could not
remember the next day.
249
00:09:48,065 --> 00:09:50,633
Probably still brilliant.
They call it high-functioning.
250
00:09:50,677 --> 00:09:53,680
Well, this Amelia
just helped a million patients
251
00:09:53,723 --> 00:09:56,160
get one step closer to a cure
for their horrible disease.
252
00:09:56,204 --> 00:09:57,422
♪ Shoot a hole into the sun
253
00:09:57,466 --> 00:09:58,641
To the one
who drilled the holes.
254
00:09:58,685 --> 00:10:01,644
To us.
255
00:10:01,688 --> 00:10:03,124
[ Indistinct chatter ]
256
00:10:03,167 --> 00:10:05,213
♪♪
257
00:10:05,256 --> 00:10:06,867
[ Food sizzling lightly ]
258
00:10:09,043 --> 00:10:10,653
Are you okay?
Yeah.
259
00:10:10,697 --> 00:10:12,220
Not exactly the night
I had planned,
260
00:10:12,263 --> 00:10:14,396
but I'm still gonna make you
the perfect steak.
261
00:10:14,439 --> 00:10:16,006
If Silver doesn't
eat it first.
262
00:10:16,050 --> 00:10:17,617
Yes, that is true.
263
00:10:17,660 --> 00:10:19,009
A little more cheese
would go a long way.
264
00:10:22,143 --> 00:10:23,927
So, Silver.
SILVER: Hmm?
265
00:10:23,971 --> 00:10:25,233
Cool name.Yeah.
266
00:10:25,276 --> 00:10:26,321
Real cool.
It feels like who I am
267
00:10:26,364 --> 00:10:27,714
in this moment, you know?
268
00:10:27,757 --> 00:10:29,367
Bright, but overlooked.
269
00:10:30,630 --> 00:10:33,502
When I first met Silver,
his name was actually Oak,
270
00:10:33,545 --> 00:10:35,330
but he's much more
of a Silver now.
271
00:10:36,766 --> 00:10:38,681
I'm sorry -- [ Stammers ]
Silver's not your real name?
272
00:10:38,725 --> 00:10:39,900
Oh, it is -- for now.
Yeah.
273
00:10:39,943 --> 00:10:41,641
Uh, we're always
evolving, you know?
274
00:10:41,684 --> 00:10:43,643
So, I change my name
each time I feel
275
00:10:43,686 --> 00:10:46,123
like a different person.Huh.
276
00:10:46,167 --> 00:10:47,603
Is that often?No more than
the next person.
277
00:10:47,647 --> 00:10:48,778
[ Chuckles ]
278
00:10:48,822 --> 00:10:50,214
Mmm.
279
00:10:50,258 --> 00:10:51,476
Mmm, that's good.
280
00:10:51,520 --> 00:10:52,477
A little salty.
281
00:10:55,698 --> 00:10:56,873
Where did you two meet?
282
00:10:56,917 --> 00:10:58,570
In the woods.[ Chuckles ]
283
00:10:58,614 --> 00:11:00,921
Charlotte participated in one
of my micro-dosing experiences.
284
00:11:02,226 --> 00:11:03,793
Drugs?
Psilocybin.
285
00:11:03,837 --> 00:11:05,316
So, 'shrooms?
Calm down.
286
00:11:05,360 --> 00:11:07,144
Real low doses.
You don't even feel it.
287
00:11:07,188 --> 00:11:08,624
As I understand it,
micro-dosing therapy
288
00:11:08,668 --> 00:11:10,060
is for people
with, uh, anxiety,
289
00:11:10,104 --> 00:11:11,888
depression,
substance abuse issues.
290
00:11:11,932 --> 00:11:13,542
Does that describe you,
Charlotte?
291
00:11:15,370 --> 00:11:17,415
We use it to get in touch
with our shadow selves --
292
00:11:17,459 --> 00:11:20,201
the parts of us that
we're ashamed and scared of.
293
00:11:20,244 --> 00:11:21,376
Not what it's for.
Meredith?
294
00:11:21,419 --> 00:11:24,292
Yeah?
Uh, micro-dosing therapy --
295
00:11:24,335 --> 00:11:26,555
know anything about it?
I...
296
00:11:26,598 --> 00:11:29,384
have read some
of the science, sure.
Mm-hmm.
297
00:11:29,427 --> 00:11:33,214
I'm not sure I'm as educated
on it as Silver is.
298
00:11:34,432 --> 00:11:36,913
So, are you guys in some
of the same classes, or...?
Nope.
299
00:11:36,957 --> 00:11:38,785
Uh, are we ready to eat?
SILVER: I'm not really
a college type of guy.
300
00:11:38,828 --> 00:11:40,743
I'm more of a student of life.
[ Chuckles ]
301
00:11:40,787 --> 00:11:42,702
So, as a student of life,
what do you do?
302
00:11:42,745 --> 00:11:44,181
We can learn a lot more
from traveling the world
303
00:11:44,225 --> 00:11:45,313
than sitting in a classroom.
304
00:11:46,793 --> 00:11:49,186
Okay, we're definitely
ready to eat.
305
00:11:49,230 --> 00:11:50,753
Mm. [ Sniffles ]
306
00:11:50,797 --> 00:11:52,189
We plan to really
study everything around us
307
00:11:52,233 --> 00:11:53,060
in Costa Rica.
308
00:11:54,670 --> 00:11:56,063
[ Clears throat ]
NICK: I'm sorry.
"Costa Rica"?
309
00:11:56,106 --> 00:11:58,413
Are you guys planning a trip
after the semester's over?
310
00:11:58,456 --> 00:12:00,502
In two weeks.
Is this some sort of study abroad?
311
00:12:00,545 --> 00:12:03,766
Why pay tuition when you can
just go for a few months?
312
00:12:03,810 --> 00:12:06,203
I was gonna tell you.
Tell me what?
313
00:12:07,639 --> 00:12:09,598
I'm leaving school.
314
00:12:09,641 --> 00:12:17,345
♪♪
315
00:12:17,388 --> 00:12:18,607
[ Birds chirping ]
316
00:12:18,650 --> 00:12:20,522
[ Sniffles ]
317
00:12:20,565 --> 00:12:26,441
♪♪
318
00:12:26,484 --> 00:12:28,008
[ Sighs ]
319
00:12:28,051 --> 00:12:37,800
♪♪
320
00:12:37,844 --> 00:12:39,584
ELLIS: I have to admit
that letter writing
321
00:12:39,628 --> 00:12:42,805
is my preferred form
of communication.
322
00:12:42,849 --> 00:12:44,633
You're able to say
what you need to say
323
00:12:44,676 --> 00:12:47,549
without rude interruption
or interference.
324
00:12:48,855 --> 00:12:51,596
"There are things I should
probably say to you, Margaret,
325
00:12:51,640 --> 00:12:54,295
and there's no time
like the present.
326
00:12:54,338 --> 00:12:56,427
My recent diagnosis
has forced me
327
00:12:56,471 --> 00:12:59,387
to think about
my own mortality.
328
00:12:59,430 --> 00:13:00,605
The past."
329
00:13:01,389 --> 00:13:03,217
"And mistakes."
330
00:13:03,260 --> 00:13:05,088
♪♪
331
00:13:11,138 --> 00:13:13,793
"You know, I think I got
my desire to take care of people
332
00:13:13,836 --> 00:13:15,142
from my mother."
I can't believe it's you.
333
00:13:15,185 --> 00:13:16,186
"She was the quintessential
housewife."
334
00:13:17,492 --> 00:13:19,233
"And everything,
down to the pleats
335
00:13:19,276 --> 00:13:22,845
in my A-line skirt,
had to be perfect.
336
00:13:22,889 --> 00:13:24,325
But that wasn't
enough for my father.
337
00:13:24,368 --> 00:13:26,240
He slept with all
of his secretaries.
338
00:13:26,283 --> 00:13:27,894
Even the married ones.
339
00:13:27,937 --> 00:13:30,679
My mother hated it, but clearly
not enough to say a word.
340
00:13:30,722 --> 00:13:33,813
But I swore I'd never become
someone's doormat."
341
00:13:33,856 --> 00:13:36,554
I would never have taken you
as the doormat type.
342
00:13:36,598 --> 00:13:38,382
I wasn't.
343
00:13:38,426 --> 00:13:39,644
Who are you?
344
00:13:39,688 --> 00:13:40,907
This letter
is for my daughter.
345
00:13:40,950 --> 00:13:42,256
It's -- It's --
I'm -- I'm -- I'm Maggie.
346
00:13:43,170 --> 00:13:44,519
Margaret.
Your daughter.
347
00:13:44,562 --> 00:13:46,695
I-I am
one of your daughters.
348
00:13:47,957 --> 00:13:50,351
Hmm.
349
00:13:50,394 --> 00:13:51,656
Where was I?
350
00:13:51,700 --> 00:13:53,136
[ Paper rustles ]
351
00:13:53,180 --> 00:13:56,879
"I swore I'd never follow
my mother's example.
352
00:13:56,923 --> 00:13:58,141
Well, that was short-lived.
353
00:13:58,185 --> 00:14:00,100
I ended up as
Richard Webber's doormat.
354
00:14:00,143 --> 00:14:01,492
Oh, how I loved that man.
355
00:14:01,536 --> 00:14:03,538
Even the part of him
that was married,
356
00:14:03,581 --> 00:14:07,063
because that meant I could
never end up like my mother..."
357
00:14:07,107 --> 00:14:08,717
Don't hover over me!
[ Gasps ]
358
00:14:08,760 --> 00:14:09,892
Y-You're distracting me.
359
00:14:09,936 --> 00:14:11,807
I'm sorry, I --
360
00:14:11,851 --> 00:14:12,895
I'm s-- Please.
361
00:14:12,939 --> 00:14:14,331
[ Breathes sharply ]
Don't go.
362
00:14:14,375 --> 00:14:15,985
Please, just keep reading.
363
00:14:16,029 --> 00:14:19,075
♪♪
364
00:14:19,119 --> 00:14:20,424
[ Clears throat ]
365
00:14:21,338 --> 00:14:23,775
Hey. Hey, you two. Hey.
Why don't you come sit down...
Give it back!
366
00:14:23,819 --> 00:14:25,342
...so that we can play
"Connect Four"?
Give me the bear!
367
00:14:25,386 --> 00:14:27,083
No!
Give me the bear!
And we can be real quiet
368
00:14:27,127 --> 00:14:28,824
so that your Aunt Maggie
can get some sleep, okay?
No, he's mine!
369
00:14:28,868 --> 00:14:30,739
Give me it!
I'll teach you my game strategy
if you come sit down.
370
00:14:30,782 --> 00:14:32,132
Always choose yellow...
BAILEY: Give it back!
371
00:14:32,175 --> 00:14:33,524
...if you want to win.
372
00:14:33,568 --> 00:14:35,091
Aren't you tired yet?
373
00:14:36,223 --> 00:14:37,354
Whew.
374
00:14:37,398 --> 00:14:40,053
Were you scared
when your mom died?
375
00:14:42,272 --> 00:14:43,665
Um...
[ Glass taps lightly ]
376
00:14:43,708 --> 00:14:46,450
Yeah, I'm -- I-I was.
377
00:14:46,494 --> 00:14:48,975
I was -- I-I was
a lot of things.
378
00:14:49,018 --> 00:14:52,152
I was scared when I thought
my mom was dying.
379
00:14:52,195 --> 00:14:53,980
Yeah, I was, too.
380
00:14:54,023 --> 00:14:55,938
But thankfully,
she's here now.
381
00:14:55,982 --> 00:14:56,939
She's okay.
382
00:14:56,983 --> 00:14:58,941
Yeah, but I'm...
383
00:14:58,985 --> 00:15:00,812
still scared.
384
00:15:00,856 --> 00:15:02,771
Yeah, I understand that.
But you know what?
385
00:15:02,814 --> 00:15:05,382
I think all we can do...
386
00:15:05,426 --> 00:15:08,733
is try to take advantage
of the time we have now
387
00:15:08,777 --> 00:15:09,996
with the people we love.
BAILEY: It's mine! It's mine!
388
00:15:10,039 --> 00:15:11,823
- Give me it!
- It's mine! Stop!
389
00:15:11,867 --> 00:15:13,390
[ Metal clattering ]
BAILEY: Ow!
390
00:15:13,434 --> 00:15:15,349
WINSTON: Oh. Uh-oh, okay.
ZOLA: Oh, God.
391
00:15:15,392 --> 00:15:16,611
What happened?
What, what, what, what, what?
392
00:15:16,654 --> 00:15:17,481
What happened?
What happened?
[ Sobbing ]
393
00:15:17,525 --> 00:15:18,874
Oh.
Oh, are you okay?
394
00:15:18,918 --> 00:15:20,310
Ooh, okay.
395
00:15:20,354 --> 00:15:22,312
[ Both sobbing ]
Ow.
396
00:15:22,356 --> 00:15:23,444
CHARLOTTE:
[ Chuckling ] I swear,
397
00:15:23,487 --> 00:15:24,488
I was gonna tell you.
398
00:15:24,532 --> 00:15:25,750
When?
Soon?
399
00:15:25,794 --> 00:15:26,969
I knew you
were gonna do this.
400
00:15:27,013 --> 00:15:28,362
I knew you were gonna be you
and freak out.
401
00:15:28,405 --> 00:15:30,146
I'm sorry. How am I supposed
to react to the news
402
00:15:30,190 --> 00:15:31,713
you're dropping out
of college?
403
00:15:31,756 --> 00:15:32,932
I'm taking time off.
404
00:15:32,975 --> 00:15:34,629
Charlotte, you have
two years left.
405
00:15:34,672 --> 00:15:35,935
I want to travel now.
406
00:15:35,978 --> 00:15:37,849
You finish,
then you travel the world.
407
00:15:37,893 --> 00:15:39,851
That's how it works.
The world really is
the best classroom.
408
00:15:39,895 --> 00:15:41,201
Dude. Please?
409
00:15:41,244 --> 00:15:42,506
He's not entirely wrong.
410
00:15:42,550 --> 00:15:44,856
Are you serious?
Will you just listen?
411
00:15:44,900 --> 00:15:47,076
Silver and I want
to elevate ourselves,
412
00:15:47,120 --> 00:15:49,426
and Costa Rica's
all about wellness --
413
00:15:49,470 --> 00:15:50,601
I'm planning some sweet
meditation workshops.
414
00:15:50,645 --> 00:15:52,299
Man, you've got
to stop talking.
415
00:15:52,342 --> 00:15:54,866
We're gonna stay in an eco-lodge
and be surrounded by nature.
416
00:15:54,910 --> 00:15:56,868
Are you hearing yourself,
or am I the only one that thinks
417
00:15:56,912 --> 00:15:58,087
this sounds ridiculous?
418
00:15:58,131 --> 00:15:59,784
Please, help me out here.
419
00:16:01,177 --> 00:16:03,136
Wow, thank you.
You know what?
420
00:16:03,179 --> 00:16:05,268
It's not your decision to make.
How you gonna pay for it?
421
00:16:05,312 --> 00:16:07,270
I have money saved,
and we're gonna make some more
422
00:16:07,314 --> 00:16:09,316
with Silver's...workshops.
423
00:16:09,359 --> 00:16:11,971
They're pay-what-you-can.
That sounds about right.
424
00:16:12,014 --> 00:16:13,407
So, what happens
when you change your mind
425
00:16:13,450 --> 00:16:15,365
about the eco-lodge
and your soul mate?
426
00:16:15,409 --> 00:16:17,585
You know, when Silver here
turns to Bronze.
427
00:16:17,628 --> 00:16:19,021
You're gonna be stuck
in Costa Rica with no money.
428
00:16:19,065 --> 00:16:20,153
Who you gonna call
then, huh?
429
00:16:21,371 --> 00:16:22,546
Not you.
430
00:16:22,590 --> 00:16:23,983
I'm the only one
you can call!
431
00:16:26,986 --> 00:16:28,857
[ Silverware clatters lightly ]
432
00:16:28,900 --> 00:16:30,946
I think this steak's Wagyu.
433
00:16:33,383 --> 00:16:35,907
An afterlife? Really?
You seem surprised.
434
00:16:35,951 --> 00:16:37,300
'Cause you're
a neuroscientist.
435
00:16:37,344 --> 00:16:39,085
Who doesn't believe
this is all there is.
436
00:16:39,128 --> 00:16:42,479
I think that this life
is part of one long journey.
437
00:16:42,523 --> 00:16:44,655
I don't think I want
to keep living life after life.
438
00:16:44,699 --> 00:16:46,222
It sounds exhausting.
439
00:16:46,266 --> 00:16:48,398
Well, I'd like to think
we do better each time.
440
00:16:48,442 --> 00:16:51,749
So, the next one
will be decent?
441
00:16:51,793 --> 00:16:53,012
Exactly.
442
00:16:53,055 --> 00:16:56,928
So, to temper
your expectations...
443
00:16:56,972 --> 00:16:58,887
the band is okay.
444
00:16:58,930 --> 00:17:00,410
The vibe is good.
445
00:17:00,454 --> 00:17:02,847
I would listen
to bad karaoke right now.
446
00:17:02,891 --> 00:17:04,719
Can you watch my Coke?
Mm-hmm.
447
00:17:04,762 --> 00:17:07,635
[ Drum solo plays ]
448
00:17:07,678 --> 00:17:09,550
[ Indistinct conversations ]
449
00:17:09,593 --> 00:17:10,812
All right, guys.
450
00:17:12,466 --> 00:17:14,250
[ Drumsticks tap rhythmically ]
451
00:17:14,294 --> 00:17:15,860
[ "Trouble" plays ]
452
00:17:15,904 --> 00:17:17,732
♪♪
453
00:17:17,775 --> 00:17:21,518
♪ You been causing me trouble
and keeping me up ♪
454
00:17:21,562 --> 00:17:23,912
♪♪
455
00:17:23,955 --> 00:17:26,045
♪ Throw your rock at my window
456
00:17:26,088 --> 00:17:28,134
♪ I'm calling your bluff
457
00:17:28,177 --> 00:17:29,831
♪♪
458
00:17:29,874 --> 00:17:33,182
♪ An eye for an eye
doesn't seem too unfair ♪
459
00:17:33,226 --> 00:17:36,316
♪ If you stare long enough
[ Crowd cheers ]
460
00:17:36,359 --> 00:17:39,101
♪ Keep your hands off my phone
and I'll leave you alone ♪
461
00:17:39,145 --> 00:17:41,756
♪ Do you miss me or what?
462
00:17:41,799 --> 00:17:43,584
♪♪
463
00:17:43,627 --> 00:17:46,978
[ Crowd cheers ]
464
00:17:47,022 --> 00:17:51,940
♪ And when the night comes,
I hope I'm causin' you trouble ♪
465
00:17:52,941 --> 00:17:57,380
♪ And when the night comes,
I hope I'm keepin' you up ♪
466
00:17:57,424 --> 00:17:59,513
♪♪
467
00:17:59,556 --> 00:18:04,866
♪ And when the night comes,
I hope I'm causin' you trouble ♪
468
00:18:04,909 --> 00:18:08,478
♪ And keepin' you,
and keepin' you up ♪
469
00:18:08,522 --> 00:18:15,137
♪♪
470
00:18:15,181 --> 00:18:21,752
♪♪
471
00:18:21,796 --> 00:18:23,276
[ Falling fabric echoes ]
472
00:18:23,319 --> 00:18:28,716
♪♪
473
00:18:28,759 --> 00:18:30,848
[ Rustling clothes echo ]
474
00:18:30,892 --> 00:18:32,720
[ Heavy breathing echoes ]
475
00:18:32,763 --> 00:18:38,726
♪♪
476
00:18:38,769 --> 00:18:45,036
♪♪
477
00:18:45,080 --> 00:18:47,169
[ Deep breath echoes ]
478
00:18:47,213 --> 00:18:53,306
♪♪
479
00:18:53,349 --> 00:18:55,308
[ Deep breath echoes ]
480
00:18:55,351 --> 00:19:02,228
♪♪
481
00:19:02,271 --> 00:19:04,143
[ Deep breath echoes ]
482
00:19:04,186 --> 00:19:05,796
♪♪
483
00:19:15,415 --> 00:19:18,157
I used to be Charlotte.
484
00:19:18,200 --> 00:19:22,204
I had pink hair,
traveled all over Europe.
485
00:19:22,248 --> 00:19:24,293
I had soul mates
that were fun.
486
00:19:24,337 --> 00:19:25,164
[ Wood splinters ]
487
00:19:27,775 --> 00:19:29,777
That supposed to make me
feel better?
Maybe.
488
00:19:29,820 --> 00:19:31,779
I'm just saying,
things worked out okay for me.
489
00:19:31,822 --> 00:19:33,041
When I thought I was dying,
what did I ask you
490
00:19:33,084 --> 00:19:34,042
to do for Charlotte?
491
00:19:34,085 --> 00:19:35,652
To make sure
she got an education.
492
00:19:35,696 --> 00:19:36,827
That's right.
493
00:19:38,002 --> 00:19:39,787
Then you should know this isn't
really up for discussion.
494
00:19:39,830 --> 00:19:42,181
Because of your sister?
I'm not gonna talk about
my sister right now.
495
00:19:43,486 --> 00:19:46,663
If you keep trying
to control her, you...
496
00:19:46,707 --> 00:19:49,057
you will lose her.
497
00:19:49,100 --> 00:19:51,973
You have to find a way
to let her be who she is.
498
00:19:52,016 --> 00:19:55,150
That's the one thing I do know
about being a 20-year-old woman.
499
00:19:55,194 --> 00:19:56,369
It's hard. I get it.
500
00:19:56,412 --> 00:19:58,501
No, you do not get it.
501
00:19:58,545 --> 00:20:00,547
You had a mother
who was a surgical genius.
502
00:20:00,590 --> 00:20:01,939
She had a woman
who couldn't recognize her
503
00:20:01,983 --> 00:20:03,985
9 times out of 10.
504
00:20:04,028 --> 00:20:06,248
She's genetically programmed
to make huge mistakes,
505
00:20:06,292 --> 00:20:07,467
and I've spent
the last 10 years trying
506
00:20:07,510 --> 00:20:08,946
to make sure that
that does not happen.
507
00:20:08,990 --> 00:20:11,688
So, no, you do not get it.
508
00:20:11,732 --> 00:20:12,689
[ Axe thumps softly ]
509
00:20:12,733 --> 00:20:16,171
♪♪
510
00:20:16,215 --> 00:20:17,390
[ Wood clatters ]
511
00:20:17,433 --> 00:20:20,610
♪♪
512
00:20:26,660 --> 00:20:28,836
She pushed me
into the fireplace.
513
00:20:28,879 --> 00:20:30,751
Ellis!
He pushed me first!
514
00:20:30,794 --> 00:20:33,144
He's my bear.
No, it's mine!
515
00:20:33,188 --> 00:20:34,842
No, give me it! Stop!
Give me! Ah!
516
00:20:34,885 --> 00:20:36,322
Hey, we want Aunt Maggie
to stay asleep
517
00:20:36,365 --> 00:20:38,149
so she doesn't see the blood
on the carpet, okay?
518
00:20:38,193 --> 00:20:40,500
How much blood is there?
Barely any.
519
00:20:40,543 --> 00:20:42,110
And I told you
not to run in the house.
520
00:20:42,153 --> 00:20:43,981
You always run
in the house.
521
00:20:44,025 --> 00:20:46,201
You know what?
522
00:20:46,245 --> 00:20:48,203
We are gonna play
emergency room.
523
00:20:48,247 --> 00:20:49,987
Is that a game?
Yeah.
524
00:20:50,031 --> 00:20:51,293
It's an exciting one, too.
525
00:20:51,337 --> 00:20:53,556
Can I play?
You're our patient.
526
00:20:53,600 --> 00:20:55,428
And, Zola,
you're my resident,
527
00:20:55,471 --> 00:20:57,299
so you will assist me
with the surgery.
528
00:20:57,343 --> 00:20:58,735
Will you prepare the antiseptic?
Mm-hmm.
529
00:20:58,779 --> 00:21:00,824
Surgery?
It's like a play surgery.
530
00:21:00,868 --> 00:21:02,522
You know, like, pretend.
It's make-believe.
531
00:21:02,565 --> 00:21:04,175
It'll be fun.
Here you go.
532
00:21:04,219 --> 00:21:05,742
Thank you,
Dr. Grey-Shepherd.
533
00:21:05,786 --> 00:21:07,266
You're welcome,
Dr. Ndugu.
534
00:21:07,309 --> 00:21:08,310
We're going to
clean the cut first,
535
00:21:08,354 --> 00:21:10,094
and then
we're going to apply gauze
536
00:21:10,138 --> 00:21:11,922
to protect the skin
and help with healing.
537
00:21:15,143 --> 00:21:16,840
[ Humming
"Hush, Little Baby" ]
538
00:21:16,884 --> 00:21:21,845
♪♪
539
00:21:21,889 --> 00:21:25,284
♪ Hush, little baby,
don't say a word ♪
[ Maggie breathing sharply ]
540
00:21:25,327 --> 00:21:28,156
♪ Papa's gonna buy you
a mockingbird ♪
541
00:21:28,199 --> 00:21:31,072
Did you ever think about me?
♪ And if that mockingbird
don't sing ♪
542
00:21:31,115 --> 00:21:32,682
Or did you ever try
to contact me...
♪ Papa's gonna buy you
543
00:21:32,726 --> 00:21:34,641
...or want to contact me?
♪ A diamond ring
544
00:21:34,684 --> 00:21:37,818
♪ And if that diamond ring
Stop singing, please.
545
00:21:37,861 --> 00:21:39,254
"I used to be
so unsure of myself.
546
00:21:39,298 --> 00:21:41,125
I constantly listened
to everyone else --
547
00:21:41,169 --> 00:21:43,171
advisors, attendings,
even other residents --
548
00:21:43,214 --> 00:21:45,434
but I never listened
to the voice inside.
549
00:21:45,478 --> 00:21:47,523
To what I wanted."
Is that why you gave me up?
550
00:21:47,567 --> 00:21:49,612
"I didn't even want to go
into general surgery initially.
551
00:21:49,656 --> 00:21:52,659
I wanted to do cardio,
but I talked myself out of it.
552
00:21:52,702 --> 00:21:54,051
I forced myself out of it."
553
00:21:54,095 --> 00:21:55,662
You wanted to go
into cardio?
554
00:21:55,705 --> 00:21:56,924
"I would have been
extraordinary."
555
00:21:56,967 --> 00:21:58,752
I am extraordinary!
556
00:21:58,795 --> 00:22:00,101
I went into cardio.
557
00:22:00,144 --> 00:22:00,971
Ellis, is that
because of you?
558
00:22:01,015 --> 00:22:02,973
How should I know?
559
00:22:03,017 --> 00:22:04,801
Because...
560
00:22:04,845 --> 00:22:06,499
I a-am your daughter.
561
00:22:06,542 --> 00:22:07,543
I...
562
00:22:08,544 --> 00:22:09,980
Please, look at me!
Please!
563
00:22:10,024 --> 00:22:12,113
Please! See me! Please!
564
00:22:12,156 --> 00:22:13,157
"Regrets are useless,
though.
565
00:22:13,201 --> 00:22:14,463
They make you weak.
566
00:22:14,507 --> 00:22:16,596
Always pining for something
out of your control.
567
00:22:16,639 --> 00:22:18,293
That's why I became
a remarkable surgeon --
568
00:22:18,337 --> 00:22:20,382
because I never let
the inconsequential
569
00:22:20,426 --> 00:22:21,427
get in my way."
570
00:22:21,470 --> 00:22:22,863
[ Scoffs ]
571
00:22:22,906 --> 00:22:24,168
I was inconsequential?
572
00:22:24,212 --> 00:22:25,996
Margaret, would you stop
interrupting?
573
00:22:29,173 --> 00:22:30,653
[ Humming
"Hush, Little Baby" ]
574
00:22:30,697 --> 00:22:32,786
♪♪
575
00:22:32,829 --> 00:22:33,874
[ Exhales sharply ]
576
00:22:33,917 --> 00:22:35,354
[ Door creaks lightly ]
577
00:22:38,705 --> 00:22:40,489
[ Snoring softly ]
578
00:22:45,538 --> 00:22:47,366
[ Door closes ]
579
00:22:48,845 --> 00:22:51,848
Your sister's kids are cute.
KAI: Yeah, they're adorable.
580
00:22:51,892 --> 00:22:53,197
PB&J?
581
00:22:53,241 --> 00:22:54,547
Yeah!
[ Chuckles ]
582
00:22:56,592 --> 00:23:00,683
Did you ever feel
the kid and marriage pressure?
583
00:23:00,727 --> 00:23:03,556
Mm, my grandmother guilts me
every Thanksgiving.
584
00:23:03,599 --> 00:23:05,035
She's not getting
any younger.
585
00:23:05,079 --> 00:23:06,167
Mm.
586
00:23:06,210 --> 00:23:08,299
So, plants?
587
00:23:08,343 --> 00:23:09,562
Yeah, mm-hmm.
588
00:23:09,605 --> 00:23:11,346
This is Ringo.
589
00:23:12,521 --> 00:23:13,609
Makes sense.
590
00:23:13,653 --> 00:23:15,785
[ Chuckles ]
And this is Janis.
591
00:23:15,829 --> 00:23:18,005
- Mm-hmm.
- Mm-hmm.
592
00:23:18,048 --> 00:23:19,833
And that is Tina.
593
00:23:19,876 --> 00:23:21,922
[ Chuckles ]
594
00:23:21,965 --> 00:23:24,054
I actually love kids.
595
00:23:24,098 --> 00:23:25,404
So much that
I don't want any.
596
00:23:28,711 --> 00:23:31,801
Being a parent is hard,
as you know.
597
00:23:31,845 --> 00:23:32,802
Don't touch.
598
00:23:32,846 --> 00:23:34,064
You are responsible
599
00:23:34,108 --> 00:23:35,457
for another person's
everything.
600
00:23:35,501 --> 00:23:37,459
Shaping their perspective
and worldview.
601
00:23:37,503 --> 00:23:38,765
Trying to keep them alive
602
00:23:38,808 --> 00:23:40,854
and help them be
a decent human being.
603
00:23:40,897 --> 00:23:42,595
All the while,
figuring out your own stuff.
604
00:23:43,770 --> 00:23:46,163
Well, yeah.
605
00:23:46,207 --> 00:23:47,556
But there's a lot of love
606
00:23:47,600 --> 00:23:49,950
that kind of comes in
to balance all of that.
607
00:23:49,993 --> 00:23:51,647
I love.
608
00:23:51,691 --> 00:23:54,084
I love my plants.
609
00:24:04,051 --> 00:24:06,836
[ Refrigerator door opens, closes ]
610
00:24:06,880 --> 00:24:08,098
Oh, hi.
Oh, sorry.
611
00:24:08,142 --> 00:24:09,143
I thought Silver
was in here.
612
00:24:09,186 --> 00:24:11,101
No, he went outside,
I think.
613
00:24:11,145 --> 00:24:12,538
He said something
about needing a "pipe."
614
00:24:13,800 --> 00:24:16,890
Um, look,
I know we just met,
615
00:24:16,933 --> 00:24:19,588
but, uh, would you mind
talking to my uncle for me?
616
00:24:19,632 --> 00:24:21,634
Since you've probably got
some sway with him right now.
617
00:24:21,677 --> 00:24:24,854
Charlotte, you remind me
so much of myself.
618
00:24:26,160 --> 00:24:28,292
Except you're a lot braver
than I was.
619
00:24:29,816 --> 00:24:32,645
I thought I was rebelling
against my mother.
620
00:24:32,688 --> 00:24:33,950
In actuality,
I was doing
621
00:24:33,994 --> 00:24:36,562
exactly
what she wanted me to do.
622
00:24:36,605 --> 00:24:38,128
I'm not rebelling.
623
00:24:39,173 --> 00:24:41,044
Are you sure?
Yes.
624
00:24:41,088 --> 00:24:42,350
Yeah, I'm sure.
625
00:24:42,393 --> 00:24:43,830
I just --
I don't know.
626
00:24:43,873 --> 00:24:46,485
I want something new,
different.
627
00:24:47,660 --> 00:24:48,704
Change.
628
00:24:48,748 --> 00:24:50,271
Yeah.
Yeah.
629
00:24:50,314 --> 00:24:52,142
The last two years
were not what I expected,
630
00:24:52,186 --> 00:24:54,057
and I've been thinking
about, you know,
631
00:24:54,101 --> 00:24:55,276
the way
I want to live my life,
632
00:24:55,319 --> 00:24:58,018
and maybe it's not
like other people
633
00:24:58,061 --> 00:25:00,673
or like how my uncle
wants me to.
634
00:25:00,716 --> 00:25:02,326
You know he means well.
[ Sighs ]
635
00:25:02,370 --> 00:25:04,546
He is so worried
about me becoming my mother
636
00:25:04,590 --> 00:25:07,984
that he doesn't see, you know,
who I'm actually becoming.
637
00:25:08,028 --> 00:25:10,552
♪♪
638
00:25:10,596 --> 00:25:13,120
Very hard to live outside
the shadow of your parents.
639
00:25:13,163 --> 00:25:14,556
Yeah, well,
he's making it harder.
640
00:25:14,600 --> 00:25:17,385
It's always been his way
or no way.
641
00:25:17,428 --> 00:25:19,387
You'll see that --
eventually.
642
00:25:19,430 --> 00:25:20,431
♪♪
643
00:25:20,475 --> 00:25:21,563
[ Door creaks open softly ]
644
00:25:21,607 --> 00:25:22,782
Will you talk to him?
645
00:25:22,825 --> 00:25:24,566
♪♪
646
00:25:24,610 --> 00:25:25,611
[ Door closes ]
647
00:25:26,525 --> 00:25:27,743
You can.
648
00:25:28,439 --> 00:25:29,789
You can.
649
00:25:29,832 --> 00:25:37,361
♪♪
650
00:25:37,405 --> 00:25:41,235
"I stopped doing what was
expected of me after Richard.
651
00:25:41,278 --> 00:25:45,152
I started doing what was best
for me, and only me."
652
00:25:45,195 --> 00:25:47,415
Now, I'm not judging you
for giving me up.
653
00:25:47,458 --> 00:25:48,764
I just feel like
you're ashamed of me.
654
00:25:48,808 --> 00:25:50,200
I'm the child of an affair
655
00:25:50,244 --> 00:25:52,855
with a married man
who didn't choose you.
656
00:25:54,596 --> 00:25:55,989
Tell me I'm wrong.
657
00:25:56,032 --> 00:25:57,556
"The first time
I met Bill and Diane,
658
00:25:57,599 --> 00:25:59,601
I was so nervous
that they would judge me.
659
00:25:59,645 --> 00:26:00,863
But it was
nothing like that.
660
00:26:00,907 --> 00:26:03,474
They we really kind,
loving, hardworking people
661
00:26:03,518 --> 00:26:05,781
who really wanted a child."
662
00:26:05,825 --> 00:26:07,696
You chose my parents?
663
00:26:07,740 --> 00:26:10,264
"I knew you were going to be
in good hands.
664
00:26:10,307 --> 00:26:11,744
They were my first choice.
665
00:26:11,787 --> 00:26:13,354
I just knew."
666
00:26:14,921 --> 00:26:16,662
"They asked if I wanted
the occasional update
667
00:26:16,705 --> 00:26:18,228
about how you were doing."
668
00:26:18,272 --> 00:26:20,622
They did?
"Of course, I declined."
669
00:26:20,666 --> 00:26:22,537
You declined?
Hmm.
670
00:26:22,581 --> 00:26:24,800
I'm not a dinner invitation, Ellis.
671
00:26:24,844 --> 00:26:26,585
♪♪
672
00:26:26,628 --> 00:26:27,977
[ Breathes sharply ]
673
00:26:28,021 --> 00:26:29,457
You declined?
674
00:26:29,500 --> 00:26:31,851
You weren't the least bit
curious about me?
675
00:26:31,894 --> 00:26:33,287
You're the one who thinks
that everything you touch
676
00:26:33,330 --> 00:26:34,636
is extraordinary.
677
00:26:34,680 --> 00:26:36,203
Didn't want to see
if I fit the bill?
678
00:26:36,246 --> 00:26:38,466
No, no, no.
Look at me, Ellis.
679
00:26:38,509 --> 00:26:40,816
You don't get to
avoid me now.
680
00:26:40,860 --> 00:26:42,470
Look at me!
What do you want me to say?!
681
00:26:42,513 --> 00:26:43,863
That I wish
it was different?
682
00:26:43,906 --> 00:26:46,648
That I wish that you
and Meredith and me and Richard
683
00:26:46,692 --> 00:26:48,824
could have been
one big, happy family?
684
00:26:48,868 --> 00:26:49,956
Well, that was
a childish fantasy.
685
00:26:49,999 --> 00:26:51,435
It was never gonna happen!
686
00:26:51,479 --> 00:26:53,046
I -- I'm here.
687
00:26:53,089 --> 00:26:56,353
Living every day in the shadow
of the great Ellis Grey.
688
00:26:56,397 --> 00:26:58,442
Her living and breathing
and walking and talking mistake,
689
00:26:58,486 --> 00:27:00,488
the one who wasn't
good enough to be approved.
690
00:27:00,531 --> 00:27:02,272
You don't know
how hard it was for me.
691
00:27:02,316 --> 00:27:04,840
But I picked up the pieces,
and I moved on.
692
00:27:04,884 --> 00:27:06,668
And I did it -- on my own.
693
00:27:06,712 --> 00:27:08,975
And I spent every day
694
00:27:09,018 --> 00:27:10,541
wondering why
I wasn't worthy.
695
00:27:10,585 --> 00:27:12,282
Didn't you ever think about
how I might feel?
696
00:27:12,326 --> 00:27:14,545
I made a decision,
and I stood by it.
697
00:27:14,589 --> 00:27:16,983
That decision not to see you
I do not regret one bit.
698
00:27:17,026 --> 00:27:19,550
That decision
I am proud of!
699
00:27:19,594 --> 00:27:21,509
[ Screams ]
700
00:27:21,552 --> 00:27:23,293
[ Breathing heavily ]
701
00:27:23,337 --> 00:27:24,947
♪♪
702
00:27:24,991 --> 00:27:26,645
[ Sighs ]
703
00:27:26,688 --> 00:27:28,516
[ Crying ]
704
00:27:28,559 --> 00:27:30,170
♪♪
705
00:27:30,213 --> 00:27:32,868
[ Running footsteps approaching ]
706
00:27:32,912 --> 00:27:35,088
[ Door opens ]
Baby, hey.
707
00:27:35,131 --> 00:27:36,089
What happened?
What's going on?
708
00:27:36,132 --> 00:27:37,046
Are you okay?
[ Exhales sharply ]
709
00:27:37,090 --> 00:27:39,701
That woman --
710
00:27:39,745 --> 00:27:42,225
She's awful. She --
711
00:27:42,269 --> 00:27:43,792
[ Exhales sharply ]
She was exactly
712
00:27:43,836 --> 00:27:45,925
how Meredith
described her.
713
00:27:45,968 --> 00:27:47,666
I don't think I'm gonna
finish the letter.
714
00:27:48,971 --> 00:27:50,233
Then don't.
715
00:27:51,757 --> 00:27:54,150
And know that...
716
00:27:54,194 --> 00:27:56,718
whatever it says
does not change
717
00:27:56,762 --> 00:27:58,546
the amazing person
that you are.
718
00:28:01,201 --> 00:28:03,333
I know.
[ Inhales sharply ]
719
00:28:03,377 --> 00:28:04,552
Okay.
720
00:28:05,771 --> 00:28:07,729
I just wish I didn't
need her to know that.
721
00:28:07,773 --> 00:28:10,558
♪♪
722
00:28:10,601 --> 00:28:12,342
Come here.
723
00:28:12,386 --> 00:28:14,475
♪♪
724
00:28:20,568 --> 00:28:22,962
Finishing school is gonna
give you more options.
725
00:28:23,005 --> 00:28:24,441
It's something
most people do not have.
726
00:28:24,485 --> 00:28:26,008
Most people --
You're talking about Mom?
Yes.
727
00:28:26,052 --> 00:28:28,271
Your mom could have had options,
but she threw them all away.
728
00:28:28,315 --> 00:28:31,274
She made the same mistake
over and over and over again.
729
00:28:31,318 --> 00:28:32,667
I know. I was there.
Then act like it!
730
00:28:32,711 --> 00:28:34,625
I'm not her!
731
00:28:34,669 --> 00:28:36,279
Oh, my --Wait, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Please, stop.
732
00:28:36,323 --> 00:28:37,193
Stop, stop, stop,
stop, stop.
No, no.
733
00:28:37,237 --> 00:28:40,109
Stop, stop, stop.
I-I-I --
734
00:28:40,153 --> 00:28:42,721
Look, I just want
what's best for you, okay?
735
00:28:42,764 --> 00:28:44,244
Based on what you want,
not what I want.
736
00:28:44,287 --> 00:28:46,115
No, based on a lot
of life experience.
737
00:28:46,159 --> 00:28:47,682
You know, most people
aren't like you.
738
00:28:47,726 --> 00:28:49,771
Not everyone wakes up one day
and immediately knows
739
00:28:49,815 --> 00:28:51,860
what they want to do.
740
00:28:51,904 --> 00:28:54,515
I need to figure
some stuff out by myself.
741
00:28:55,821 --> 00:28:57,779
Why can't that be okay?
742
00:28:58,780 --> 00:29:00,260
I just...
743
00:29:02,262 --> 00:29:05,439
I don't want you
to have to struggle.
744
00:29:05,482 --> 00:29:07,354
Will you give yourself
some more credit?
745
00:29:07,397 --> 00:29:09,835
Have you ever had
to bail me out of jail?
746
00:29:09,878 --> 00:29:12,272
Or, like, pick me up
off the side of the road?
747
00:29:12,315 --> 00:29:15,144
Or -- I don't know,
take pills out of my hand?
748
00:29:15,188 --> 00:29:16,972
No.
Because you did your job.
749
00:29:18,495 --> 00:29:21,150
I'm okay,
and it's because of you
750
00:29:21,194 --> 00:29:24,066
that I can even think
about traveling the world.
751
00:29:26,634 --> 00:29:30,116
I will go back to school.
I promise.
752
00:29:31,508 --> 00:29:33,032
CHARLOTTE: I'll make sure
that I have options.
753
00:29:33,075 --> 00:29:34,555
But in order
for me to do that,
754
00:29:34,598 --> 00:29:38,820
you have to stop trying
to dictate my every move.
755
00:29:38,864 --> 00:29:41,040
You have to let me mess up
756
00:29:41,083 --> 00:29:43,477
and, like, change my mind
a few times.
757
00:29:43,520 --> 00:29:45,827
♪♪
758
00:29:45,871 --> 00:29:48,090
And if I do drugs...
[ Scoffs ] Charlotte.
759
00:29:48,134 --> 00:29:51,615
...they will be
plant-based, okay?
760
00:29:51,659 --> 00:29:53,226
So calm down.
761
00:29:53,269 --> 00:29:54,836
[ Chuckles ]
762
00:29:54,880 --> 00:29:56,533
[ Sighs ]
763
00:29:56,577 --> 00:30:02,017
♪♪
764
00:30:02,061 --> 00:30:07,501
♪♪
765
00:30:07,544 --> 00:30:09,198
[ Insects chirping in distance ]
766
00:30:10,678 --> 00:30:13,028
[ Snoring softly ]
767
00:30:18,729 --> 00:30:27,651
♪♪
768
00:30:27,695 --> 00:30:29,218
ELLIS:
"I do have one regret."
769
00:30:29,262 --> 00:30:30,872
[ Sighs ]
770
00:30:30,916 --> 00:30:32,439
Please, go.
771
00:30:32,482 --> 00:30:34,920
"I do wish that you
and Meredith could have met.
772
00:30:34,963 --> 00:30:37,444
She could have used a sister.
773
00:30:37,487 --> 00:30:38,924
She's so much like me.
774
00:30:38,967 --> 00:30:41,274
Stubborn, singular-focused.
775
00:30:41,317 --> 00:30:44,016
I have a feeling you would have
been a good influence on her."
776
00:30:44,059 --> 00:30:45,234
♪♪
777
00:30:45,278 --> 00:30:47,149
True sisters.
778
00:30:47,193 --> 00:30:49,456
♪♪
779
00:30:49,499 --> 00:30:50,936
We are.
780
00:30:52,807 --> 00:30:55,549
I wasn't the best mother
to Meredith.
781
00:30:55,592 --> 00:30:57,116
I had high expectations
782
00:30:57,159 --> 00:30:58,987
which she couldn't
always reach.
783
00:30:59,031 --> 00:31:01,903
♪♪
784
00:31:01,947 --> 00:31:04,950
But I did my best
with you,
785
00:31:04,993 --> 00:31:07,430
by giving you away.
786
00:31:07,474 --> 00:31:10,390
I knew you would be better off
with Bill and Diane.
787
00:31:10,433 --> 00:31:11,782
♪♪
788
00:31:11,826 --> 00:31:13,349
I was.
789
00:31:13,393 --> 00:31:21,401
♪♪
790
00:31:21,444 --> 00:31:29,539
♪♪
791
00:31:29,583 --> 00:31:33,630
♪♪
792
00:31:33,674 --> 00:31:36,546
Hey, my baby.
793
00:31:36,590 --> 00:31:38,157
[ Exhales sharply ]
[ Chuckles ]
794
00:31:38,200 --> 00:31:39,810
Mom!
795
00:31:39,854 --> 00:31:42,074
[ Breathes sharply ]
796
00:31:42,117 --> 00:31:44,163
[ Sighs ]
797
00:31:44,206 --> 00:31:45,425
Okay.
798
00:31:45,468 --> 00:31:48,907
[ Breathes deeply ]
799
00:31:48,950 --> 00:31:51,997
♪♪
800
00:31:52,040 --> 00:31:53,955
[ Breathes sharply ]
801
00:31:53,999 --> 00:31:55,130
♪♪
802
00:31:55,174 --> 00:31:57,219
[ Sniffles ]
803
00:31:57,263 --> 00:31:58,786
[ Exhales sharply ]
804
00:31:58,829 --> 00:32:03,225
♪♪
805
00:32:03,269 --> 00:32:05,662
[ Mellow tune plays on guitar ]
806
00:32:05,706 --> 00:32:08,535
♪♪
807
00:32:08,578 --> 00:32:10,929
AMELIA: When did you get
into music?
808
00:32:10,972 --> 00:32:12,365
A few years ago.
Really?
809
00:32:12,408 --> 00:32:14,062
You looked like you'd been
playing since you were a kid.
810
00:32:14,106 --> 00:32:15,063
[ Chuckles ]
811
00:32:15,107 --> 00:32:17,326
It started
as a dare, actually.
812
00:32:17,370 --> 00:32:19,067
My friend took me
to an Open Mic Night,
813
00:32:19,111 --> 00:32:21,940
certain it would cure
my hatred of public speaking.
814
00:32:21,983 --> 00:32:23,419
Didn't work.
[ Chuckles ]
815
00:32:23,463 --> 00:32:24,725
[ Chuckling ] Clearly.
816
00:32:24,768 --> 00:32:27,380
No, still hate it,
but performing is different.
817
00:32:27,423 --> 00:32:29,860
It's like this deep
part of myself
818
00:32:29,904 --> 00:32:33,168
that doesn't get
to come out often...
819
00:32:33,212 --> 00:32:35,910
gets to be a rock star.
820
00:32:35,954 --> 00:32:37,825
You're real carefree
on stage.
821
00:32:37,868 --> 00:32:39,609
I am.
822
00:32:39,653 --> 00:32:41,176
And self-assured.
823
00:32:41,220 --> 00:32:43,265
♪♪
824
00:32:43,309 --> 00:32:45,964
Just when I feel like
I'm figuring my stuff out...
825
00:32:46,007 --> 00:32:48,314
[ Groans ]
...life lifes.
826
00:32:48,357 --> 00:32:50,620
Why do you pretend like
you're not a rock star yourself?
827
00:32:50,664 --> 00:32:53,101
♪♪
828
00:32:53,145 --> 00:32:55,495
Thank you
for flattering me.
829
00:32:55,538 --> 00:32:57,279
No, I-I'm wondering.
830
00:32:57,323 --> 00:32:59,412
Why do you self-deprecate?
831
00:32:59,455 --> 00:33:00,848
You're more than that.
832
00:33:00,891 --> 00:33:02,937
[ Siren wails in distance ]
833
00:33:06,158 --> 00:33:07,811
[ Chuckles ]
834
00:33:09,030 --> 00:33:10,727
I don't know.
835
00:33:10,771 --> 00:33:13,165
I guess...
836
00:33:13,208 --> 00:33:16,081
it's kind of become
my shield of armor.
837
00:33:16,124 --> 00:33:17,386
Protection.
838
00:33:17,430 --> 00:33:18,997
From what?
839
00:33:20,650 --> 00:33:22,609
From fully loving
every part of me.
840
00:33:24,132 --> 00:33:28,223
'Cause if I do, then...
841
00:33:28,267 --> 00:33:30,486
I deserve a love
that does the same.
842
00:33:30,530 --> 00:33:33,098
It took me a long time
to embrace all of who I am.
843
00:33:33,141 --> 00:33:36,536
So, outside love
is like icing.
844
00:33:36,579 --> 00:33:40,322
♪♪
845
00:33:40,366 --> 00:33:44,152
I don't even think
I know all of who I am.
846
00:33:44,196 --> 00:33:47,938
Well, I'm excited to get to know
all of who you are.
847
00:33:47,982 --> 00:33:52,378
♪♪
848
00:33:52,421 --> 00:33:53,857
Me, too.
849
00:33:53,901 --> 00:33:58,123
♪♪
850
00:33:58,166 --> 00:33:59,689
You sure you two
don't wanna come?
851
00:33:59,733 --> 00:34:01,604
Should be a sick
full moon ceremony.
852
00:34:01,648 --> 00:34:02,997
Meredith?
Sick full moon?
853
00:34:03,041 --> 00:34:04,390
I'm good.
We'll pass.
854
00:34:04,433 --> 00:34:05,739
It was nice meeting you.
855
00:34:05,782 --> 00:34:07,393
I'm glad my uncle has
someone else to worry about.
856
00:34:07,436 --> 00:34:09,438
Have a great time
in Costa Rica.
857
00:34:09,482 --> 00:34:10,265
We will.
858
00:34:11,658 --> 00:34:13,703
So, next weekend, yes?
Yes, yes, yes.
859
00:34:13,747 --> 00:34:15,662
I will come, and I'll give you
all the deets about our trip.
860
00:34:15,705 --> 00:34:17,968
You know, coordinates, flights,
the trees I'll be touching.
861
00:34:18,012 --> 00:34:19,535
[ Chuckling ]
Okay. Goodbye.
862
00:34:23,061 --> 00:34:24,801
[ Sighs ]
863
00:34:30,242 --> 00:34:33,593
I'm sorry our weekend
got ruined.
864
00:34:33,636 --> 00:34:36,161
No, these are our lives.
865
00:34:36,204 --> 00:34:37,901
There's no need
to apologize for them.
866
00:34:38,859 --> 00:34:40,078
[ Exhales sharply ]
867
00:34:44,778 --> 00:34:46,519
I'm not used to help.
868
00:34:47,868 --> 00:34:49,087
Someone else's opinion.
869
00:34:49,130 --> 00:34:50,610
Well, if you know
anything about me,
870
00:34:50,653 --> 00:34:52,133
you'll have to
get used to it.
871
00:34:52,177 --> 00:34:53,352
Well, yeah,
that's not easy for me.
872
00:34:53,395 --> 00:34:54,701
I mean, how would you feel
if I was trying
873
00:34:54,744 --> 00:34:56,224
to give you help
when it comes to your sisters?
874
00:34:56,268 --> 00:34:57,704
I wouldn't like it,
875
00:34:57,747 --> 00:34:59,488
and I would tell you
you were wrong.
876
00:34:59,532 --> 00:35:01,621
Well, then, we’re gonna
have to get used to it.
877
00:35:06,539 --> 00:35:08,802
Charlotte's a great girl.
878
00:35:08,845 --> 00:35:10,282
You did a really good job.
879
00:35:10,325 --> 00:35:11,587
The weird thing is,
880
00:35:11,631 --> 00:35:14,155
is I don't want her
to end up like me, either.
881
00:35:14,199 --> 00:35:16,288
So rigid one day,
she wakes up
882
00:35:16,331 --> 00:35:17,898
and wants to rethink
everything.
883
00:35:17,941 --> 00:35:19,682
Is that what you're doing?
884
00:35:19,726 --> 00:35:21,902
I chose a career where saving
one life means losing another,
885
00:35:21,945 --> 00:35:25,645
and every case feels harder
than the last.
886
00:35:25,688 --> 00:35:27,255
Are you thinking
about quitting?
887
00:35:27,299 --> 00:35:28,343
No.
888
00:35:28,387 --> 00:35:29,866
[ Chuckles ]
889
00:35:29,910 --> 00:35:30,998
I don't know.
890
00:35:31,781 --> 00:35:34,001
I don't -- I don't know.
891
00:35:37,918 --> 00:35:40,573
You know, Hamilton thinks that
I took the Parkinson's project
892
00:35:40,616 --> 00:35:43,358
because I'm really trying
to cure Alzheimer's.
893
00:35:43,402 --> 00:35:45,491
Is that true?
I don't know.
894
00:35:45,534 --> 00:35:47,232
But I also don't know
if I can just go back
895
00:35:47,275 --> 00:35:49,712
to Grey-Sloan and be
Chief of General anymore.
896
00:35:49,756 --> 00:35:51,497
[ Sighs lightly ]
897
00:35:51,540 --> 00:35:53,020
♪♪
898
00:36:00,027 --> 00:36:03,509
You know, I think today,
you saw that I'm not the, um --
899
00:36:03,552 --> 00:36:05,554
I'm not the most, uh...
900
00:36:05,598 --> 00:36:07,556
♪♪
901
00:36:07,600 --> 00:36:09,210
Patient?
902
00:36:09,254 --> 00:36:11,212
Yeah, that's it.
903
00:36:11,256 --> 00:36:14,215
Who is patient when it comes
to their family?
904
00:36:14,259 --> 00:36:16,609
♪ Think I got a new philosophy
905
00:36:16,652 --> 00:36:18,045
Not me.
906
00:36:18,088 --> 00:36:21,744
♪ I wanna dive right in
907
00:36:21,788 --> 00:36:23,572
I also have a temper.
908
00:36:23,616 --> 00:36:24,791
You have a temper?
Yeah.
909
00:36:24,834 --> 00:36:27,010
Well, I don't believe it.
[ Chuckles ]
910
00:36:27,054 --> 00:36:29,448
[ Chuckles ]
911
00:36:29,491 --> 00:36:30,840
♪ But I don't think
I know how to swim ♪
912
00:36:30,884 --> 00:36:34,366
I threw a retractor once.
Yeah.
913
00:36:34,409 --> 00:36:36,977
About eight years ago,
after losing a patient, I --
914
00:36:37,020 --> 00:36:38,631
♪ And when I'm standing
on the precipice ♪
915
00:36:38,674 --> 00:36:41,547
I didn't hit anymore,
but I-I think about it
916
00:36:41,590 --> 00:36:43,375
about once a day.
917
00:36:43,418 --> 00:36:46,639
I also have a very hard time
trusting people.
918
00:36:46,682 --> 00:36:48,771
And if you sell insurance
or you don't like dogs,
919
00:36:48,815 --> 00:36:50,033
you're dead to me.
[ Chuckles ]
920
00:36:50,077 --> 00:36:52,253
Well, agreed on that.
[ Chuckles ]
921
00:36:52,297 --> 00:36:54,516
♪ Some days I wonder
why I'm doing this ♪
922
00:36:54,560 --> 00:36:57,824
♪ So much easier
to love regret ♪I just --
923
00:36:57,867 --> 00:37:00,348
When I'm falling in love,
I-I-I --
924
00:37:00,392 --> 00:37:01,871
I mean, it scares me
925
00:37:01,915 --> 00:37:04,004
because I've done it
very rarely in my life.
926
00:37:04,047 --> 00:37:06,876
♪ My love, if I jumped in
927
00:37:06,920 --> 00:37:09,270
♪ Would you save me from drowning? ♪
I just don't love the feeling
of losing control.
928
00:37:09,314 --> 00:37:11,098
When you're falling
in love?
929
00:37:11,141 --> 00:37:12,578
♪ Is it too much to ask,
dear? ♪
930
00:37:12,621 --> 00:37:14,710
♪ I need to know Yeah, when
I'm falling in love.
931
00:37:14,754 --> 00:37:16,408
♪ I need to know
you'll be here ♪
932
00:37:16,451 --> 00:37:19,280
♪ My love, if I jumped in
933
00:37:19,324 --> 00:37:22,805
♪ Would you save me
from drowning? ♪
934
00:37:22,849 --> 00:37:25,591
♪ Is it too much to ask, dear?
935
00:37:25,634 --> 00:37:27,027
♪ I need to know
936
00:37:27,070 --> 00:37:30,639
♪ I need to know
you'll be here ♪
937
00:37:30,683 --> 00:37:34,295
♪ Stuck on the poolside
938
00:37:34,339 --> 00:37:37,124
♪ Trying just to get by
939
00:37:37,167 --> 00:37:42,085
♪ Been waiting a long time
just to know ♪
940
00:37:43,522 --> 00:37:47,917
♪ But the poolside's
all I know ♪
941
00:37:49,223 --> 00:37:51,181
WINSTON: There you go!
Thank you.
942
00:37:51,225 --> 00:37:52,270
Is Aunt Maggie okay?
943
00:37:52,313 --> 00:37:54,272
Yeah.
944
00:37:54,315 --> 00:37:55,229
She's all right.
945
00:37:58,667 --> 00:38:00,103
Are you okay?
946
00:38:01,409 --> 00:38:04,369
Do you think my birth mother
thinks about me?
947
00:38:06,936 --> 00:38:08,242
Do you think about her?
948
00:38:08,286 --> 00:38:12,072
I wonder about her,
but I feel bad about it.
949
00:38:12,115 --> 00:38:14,335
I don't want to make
my mom sad.
950
00:38:14,379 --> 00:38:16,381
I think it's normal
to wonder where we came from
951
00:38:16,424 --> 00:38:17,860
and why we are
the way we are.
952
00:38:17,904 --> 00:38:19,471
And we can --
953
00:38:19,514 --> 00:38:21,560
we can have
different feelings about it.
954
00:38:21,603 --> 00:38:23,170
[ Mouths word ]
955
00:38:23,213 --> 00:38:24,476
Growing up, I didn't like
being around my dad
956
00:38:24,519 --> 00:38:26,956
because of some
of the decisions he made.
957
00:38:27,000 --> 00:38:29,611
But my mom --
958
00:38:29,655 --> 00:38:31,570
she was my hero.
959
00:38:31,613 --> 00:38:33,659
♪♪
960
00:38:33,702 --> 00:38:35,530
So's mine.
961
00:38:35,574 --> 00:38:38,881
♪ Your eyes look bored,
your brow's mean ♪
962
00:38:38,925 --> 00:38:42,276
♪♪
963
00:38:42,320 --> 00:38:46,672
♪ Looking upon
your lit up screen ♪
964
00:38:46,715 --> 00:38:48,891
♪♪
965
00:38:48,935 --> 00:38:52,330
♪ And the story that plays out... ♪
You know, you could stay.
966
00:38:52,373 --> 00:38:54,201
♪ ...is not clean
[ Sighs ]
967
00:38:54,244 --> 00:38:55,768
I can't.
Why not?
968
00:38:55,811 --> 00:38:58,379
Because I'm a mom.
969
00:38:58,423 --> 00:39:01,861
♪ You can't un-see
what you've seen ♪
And when I'm here in Minnesota...
970
00:39:02,949 --> 00:39:04,516
[ Sighs ]
971
00:39:04,559 --> 00:39:07,040
...I miss my son
with every cell of my body.
972
00:39:07,083 --> 00:39:08,650
♪ I go walking out,
the storms upon me ♪
973
00:39:08,694 --> 00:39:10,609
And I hope that part of me
doesn't scare you away,
974
00:39:10,652 --> 00:39:14,961
because it is a part of me
that I truly, deeply love.
975
00:39:15,004 --> 00:39:16,963
♪ And I'm wandering about
upon the stone ♪
976
00:39:17,006 --> 00:39:18,834
♪♪
977
00:39:18,878 --> 00:39:24,405
♪ And the evening sky
is storming, too ♪
978
00:39:24,449 --> 00:39:26,364
♪♪
979
00:39:26,407 --> 00:39:29,802
♪ Was I better off
980
00:39:29,845 --> 00:39:31,978
♪ The less I knew?
981
00:39:32,021 --> 00:39:37,679
♪♪
982
00:39:37,723 --> 00:39:39,420
MEREDITH:
Who you really are
983
00:39:39,464 --> 00:39:41,422
is the result
of many, many things.
984
00:39:41,466 --> 00:39:44,294
♪ We're coming up in odd days
985
00:39:44,338 --> 00:39:45,992
How you deal with fear.
986
00:39:46,035 --> 00:39:50,562
♪ And one person's easy path's
another's maze ♪
987
00:39:50,605 --> 00:39:52,390
Who you surround yourself with.
988
00:39:52,433 --> 00:39:55,131
♪ And yet we go on unfazed
989
00:39:55,175 --> 00:39:56,872
I can't believe
she wrote this.
990
00:39:58,787 --> 00:40:00,920
It doesn't even
seem like her.
991
00:40:00,963 --> 00:40:02,443
[ Sighs ]
992
00:40:02,487 --> 00:40:03,792
It's not like
she mailed it.
993
00:40:03,836 --> 00:40:05,359
[ Lighter clicks ]
994
00:40:05,403 --> 00:40:07,579
She could have forgotten
she wrote it.
995
00:40:07,622 --> 00:40:09,755
♪ See the dog trees swaying
Are you glad you read it?
996
00:40:09,798 --> 00:40:11,496
♪ Above the ground
997
00:40:11,539 --> 00:40:13,019
I don't know.
998
00:40:13,062 --> 00:40:14,977
I just...
♪ And the cold
999
00:40:15,021 --> 00:40:17,240
...felt like I should.
♪ Upon your skin
1000
00:40:17,284 --> 00:40:19,460
♪ It feels so true
1001
00:40:19,504 --> 00:40:21,984
I used to feel like
there was something missing,
1002
00:40:22,028 --> 00:40:24,770
and I just figured
it was her.
1003
00:40:24,813 --> 00:40:26,598
♪ Were you better off,
the less you knew? ♪
1004
00:40:26,641 --> 00:40:29,383
♪♪
1005
00:40:29,427 --> 00:40:30,993
I don't feel that way
anymore.
1006
00:40:31,037 --> 00:40:32,604
♪ And all I see
Mm-hmm.
1007
00:40:32,647 --> 00:40:34,432
♪ Is greys and greens
1008
00:40:34,475 --> 00:40:36,085
♪♪
1009
00:40:36,129 --> 00:40:40,786
♪ With all the other colors
in between ♪
1010
00:40:40,829 --> 00:40:42,788
[ Fire whoosh echoes ]
1011
00:40:42,831 --> 00:40:44,746
♪♪
1012
00:40:44,790 --> 00:40:46,531
And how you show up
when it matters.
1013
00:40:46,574 --> 00:40:51,100
♪♪
1014
00:40:51,144 --> 00:40:54,974
♪ The less we know, oh-oh
1015
00:40:55,017 --> 00:40:56,410
♪ The less we know
1016
00:40:56,454 --> 00:40:58,978
♪♪
1017
00:40:59,021 --> 00:41:02,851
♪ Are we better off
the less we know? ♪
1018
00:41:21,566 --> 00:41:29,878
♪♪
1019
00:41:29,922 --> 00:41:38,539
♪♪
1020
00:41:38,583 --> 00:41:46,939
♪♪
66684
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