Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:14,447 --> 00:00:15,880
[knock on door]
2
00:00:15,882 --> 00:00:19,016
[Man]
Coming!
3
00:00:19,018 --> 00:00:20,384
I'm coming as fast
as I can!
4
00:00:20,386 --> 00:00:22,386
Hey!
What's up, man?
5
00:00:22,388 --> 00:00:23,920
What's up, dude?
6
00:00:23,922 --> 00:00:25,054
Sorry, I'm late.
7
00:00:25,056 --> 00:00:26,055
No problem.
8
00:00:26,057 --> 00:00:27,589
So, I'll go get
my suit.
9
00:00:27,591 --> 00:00:28,957
You bring
the spare board?
10
00:00:28,959 --> 00:00:31,392
Oh, bro, no, I didn't.
I forgot it.
11
00:00:31,394 --> 00:00:32,426
But you know what?
12
00:00:32,428 --> 00:00:34,961
I got something
else you can ride.
13
00:00:37,764 --> 00:00:40,799
Aw, dude,
I got you all wet.
14
00:00:40,801 --> 00:00:44,002
Maybe we should get you
out of those clothes, bro.
15
00:00:44,004 --> 00:00:46,237
Dude...I got
a girlfriend.
16
00:00:46,239 --> 00:00:49,006
Does she know you
mess around with dudes,
17
00:00:49,008 --> 00:00:51,475
or are you just
some big closet case?
18
00:00:51,477 --> 00:00:54,277
Maybe you're confused.
19
00:00:54,279 --> 00:00:57,146
Or maybe you like
playing confused.
20
00:00:57,148 --> 00:01:00,149
I-I don't know.
21
00:01:00,151 --> 00:01:02,818
[mocking]
I don't know what I am.
22
00:01:02,820 --> 00:01:04,553
You're so sexy
when you stammer.
23
00:01:08,323 --> 00:01:09,656
You're good.
24
00:01:09,658 --> 00:01:11,591
Yeah.
25
00:01:11,593 --> 00:01:13,092
I play confused.
26
00:01:13,094 --> 00:01:14,259
Don't get me wrong.
27
00:01:14,261 --> 00:01:16,928
I'm straight.
28
00:01:16,930 --> 00:01:18,695
Mostly.
29
00:01:20,597 --> 00:01:22,698
[panting]
30
00:01:22,700 --> 00:01:24,433
No, rip open my shirt.
31
00:01:24,435 --> 00:01:26,501
Sir, yes, sir.
32
00:01:26,503 --> 00:01:28,035
Strip.
33
00:01:30,104 --> 00:01:31,504
[scoffs]
Amateur.
34
00:01:37,276 --> 00:01:39,176
[moaning]
35
00:01:40,811 --> 00:01:42,645
[grunts]
Less teeth, more tongue.
36
00:01:47,016 --> 00:01:48,149
This is how you do it.
37
00:01:49,217 --> 00:01:52,185
[moaning]
Oh, that feels so good.
38
00:01:52,187 --> 00:01:55,288
God, I love your tits.
[Woman]Stop calling them tits.
39
00:01:55,290 --> 00:01:58,858
I want to eat
your tits all day.
40
00:01:58,860 --> 00:02:01,627
Stop calling them tits.
I love your tits.
41
00:02:01,629 --> 00:02:03,996
Stop calling them tits!
Sorry.
42
00:02:03,998 --> 00:02:07,932
I love your breasts.
I want to fuck
your breasts.
43
00:02:07,934 --> 00:02:11,368
[moaning]
Shane, sweetie...
44
00:02:11,370 --> 00:02:14,738
Are you having
that gay fantasy again?
[sighs]
45
00:02:14,740 --> 00:02:18,708
Honey, it's not you.
46
00:02:18,710 --> 00:02:21,310
It's...
Well, it's you.
47
00:02:23,479 --> 00:02:26,481
What's wrong if I want
to see a little boy-on-boy
in the bedroom?
48
00:02:26,483 --> 00:02:29,317
Nothing, I guess,
if you're a gay man.
49
00:02:29,319 --> 00:02:31,519
Close enough.
But you can't expect me
50
00:02:31,521 --> 00:02:33,888
to go gay every time
you want to have sex.
51
00:02:33,890 --> 00:02:38,058
I don't want you to be gay,
just...gayer.
52
00:02:38,060 --> 00:02:40,960
So, you want me
to get it on
53
00:02:40,962 --> 00:02:42,361
with another guy
in front of you?
54
00:02:42,363 --> 00:02:46,931
Well, in front of,
on top of, yeah.
55
00:02:46,933 --> 00:02:49,500
Gwen, I'm not gay.
I'm not bi.
56
00:02:49,502 --> 00:02:51,335
I'm a heterosexual breeder.
57
00:02:51,337 --> 00:02:54,437
And if you can't accept that,
then we probably shouldn't
be dating.
58
00:02:56,540 --> 00:02:58,173
How can you be
so homophobic?
59
00:02:58,175 --> 00:02:59,674
You're ridiculous.
60
00:02:59,676 --> 00:03:02,076
Oh, don't even think
you're breaking up with me.
61
00:03:02,078 --> 00:03:04,178
I'm breaking up with you.
Huh?
62
00:03:04,180 --> 00:03:06,013
I've sat in millions
of bedrooms
63
00:03:06,015 --> 00:03:07,347
and listened
to millions of boys
64
00:03:07,349 --> 00:03:08,981
tell me they're leaving me
for the pole.
65
00:03:08,983 --> 00:03:11,350
I'm not going to sit here
and have one leave me
for pussy!
66
00:03:11,352 --> 00:03:14,386
What?
I'm leaving you, Shane!
67
00:03:14,388 --> 00:03:18,056
Go not suck
all the dick you want!
Yeah?
68
00:03:18,058 --> 00:03:20,825
And you keep laying
that pride parade march
right on through your crotch!
69
00:03:20,827 --> 00:03:24,027
Gay-basher!
Tits, tits, tits, tits, tits!
70
00:03:26,363 --> 00:03:28,364
Crazy fuckin'
doesn't know what she wants--
71
00:03:29,366 --> 00:03:30,532
[sighs]
72
00:03:44,145 --> 00:03:46,412
Stop the spread
of faggotry.
73
00:03:47,647 --> 00:03:49,747
Stop the spread
of faggotry.
74
00:03:51,750 --> 00:03:53,984
Fag.
I wish!
75
00:03:58,956 --> 00:04:01,223
I told you this
was gonna happen.
I know, Kyle.
76
00:04:01,225 --> 00:04:03,158
That's all you've said
from day two:
77
00:04:03,160 --> 00:04:06,494
"You're too hot, Marc.
You're gonna leave me."
And look how right I was.
78
00:04:07,629 --> 00:04:12,099
You weren't right, Kyle.
79
00:04:12,101 --> 00:04:15,936
Your puppy-dog eyes
and goofy charm turned me on,
but you wouldn't believe it.
80
00:04:15,938 --> 00:04:18,071
How could I believe it
when you flirt with everyone?
81
00:04:18,073 --> 00:04:20,173
I don't flirt with everyone.
82
00:04:20,175 --> 00:04:22,642
I just...like making friends.
83
00:04:22,644 --> 00:04:25,478
Well, did you have to
befriend every member
of the gymnastics team
84
00:04:25,480 --> 00:04:27,079
and Alpha Gamma Testes?
85
00:04:27,081 --> 00:04:28,747
God, it's like
you're only happy
86
00:04:28,749 --> 00:04:30,415
when you think
you can't have me.
87
00:04:30,417 --> 00:04:32,817
I wouldn't be jealous
if you went out and made
some hot friends.
88
00:04:32,819 --> 00:04:35,152
See? I'm too boring
for you.
89
00:04:35,154 --> 00:04:37,287
You want a boyfriend
who's all social
and hangs out
90
00:04:37,289 --> 00:04:41,356
with confident,
sophisticated
guys like...him.
91
00:04:41,358 --> 00:04:43,358
Hey, Sebastian.
Who's this?
92
00:04:43,360 --> 00:04:46,127
Who are you?
He's here
for emotional support.
93
00:04:46,129 --> 00:04:48,662
I'm supposed to be
your emotional support.
94
00:04:48,664 --> 00:04:50,597
But you're too emotional.
95
00:04:53,000 --> 00:04:56,202
[moaning]
96
00:04:56,204 --> 00:04:57,702
Fags.
97
00:05:00,338 --> 00:05:02,906
So, what, it's been about...
[smacking lips]
98
00:05:02,908 --> 00:05:04,841
five days since
you last jerked off?
99
00:05:04,843 --> 00:05:06,142
Wow, you're good.
100
00:05:06,144 --> 00:05:07,643
[chuckles]
101
00:05:07,645 --> 00:05:09,778
Thanks, Eric.
That was fun.
102
00:05:09,780 --> 00:05:10,945
No. Thank you, Teri.
103
00:05:13,682 --> 00:05:15,049
Tiffani.
104
00:05:15,051 --> 00:05:19,052
And I think this is yours.
[spits]
105
00:05:19,054 --> 00:05:21,287
Well, have fun fucking
his puppy-dog eyes
106
00:05:21,289 --> 00:05:24,456
and goofy charm.
107
00:05:24,458 --> 00:05:29,260
I hope someday you can see
past everything you don't like
about yourself
108
00:05:29,262 --> 00:05:31,729
and realize we had
something special.
109
00:05:31,731 --> 00:05:35,865
Wow. That was Hallmarky,
Marc, even for you.
110
00:05:35,867 --> 00:05:38,067
[scoffs]
111
00:05:39,469 --> 00:05:42,303
Stop the spread
of faggotry.
112
00:05:44,339 --> 00:05:46,273
Stop the spread
of faggotry.
113
00:05:58,486 --> 00:06:00,153
[sighs]
114
00:06:02,523 --> 00:06:05,458
Okay, just because
we used to date the same loser
115
00:06:05,460 --> 00:06:07,693
doesn't mean we have to be
all cunty to each other.
116
00:06:09,429 --> 00:06:11,530
You're right. Truce?
117
00:06:12,532 --> 00:06:15,333
Oh, I'm s--
118
00:06:18,103 --> 00:06:21,238
[whimpering]
What's wrong?
119
00:06:21,240 --> 00:06:22,906
I just...
120
00:06:22,908 --> 00:06:25,608
I don't want to be
a slut anymore.
121
00:06:25,610 --> 00:06:27,610
I want a boyfriend.
122
00:06:27,612 --> 00:06:30,111
[sobbing]
123
00:06:32,347 --> 00:06:33,847
I just really wish Caleb
was still here.
124
00:06:33,849 --> 00:06:36,783
Is that the heterosexual
you were trying to sleep with?
125
00:06:36,785 --> 00:06:38,117
No. Well, yes.
126
00:06:38,119 --> 00:06:40,052
He was my roommate
who I used to want.
127
00:06:40,054 --> 00:06:41,386
Your roommate dumped you?
128
00:06:41,388 --> 00:06:42,954
No, my boyfriend dumped me.
129
00:06:42,956 --> 00:06:45,022
My roommate isn't here
to help me through this.
130
00:06:45,024 --> 00:06:47,257
So, is your roommate the gay one
or the straight one?
131
00:06:47,259 --> 00:06:49,325
You're not listening to me.
My boyfriend's gay,
132
00:06:49,327 --> 00:06:52,394
and not just that,
he's the hottest gay
I will ever make it with.
133
00:06:52,396 --> 00:06:54,696
Honey, you're gonna make it
with plenty of hotties.
134
00:06:54,698 --> 00:06:58,232
Mom, it's not even that.
He's gonna find a new boyfriend
first, and I'm gonna be alone.
135
00:06:58,234 --> 00:07:00,200
You are notgoing to be alone.
136
00:07:00,202 --> 00:07:03,102
There are plenty
of rainbow fish in the sea.
137
00:07:03,104 --> 00:07:05,637
Ha-ha.
Plenty of cocks in the henhouse.
138
00:07:05,639 --> 00:07:08,606
Mom!
Plenty of freshmen ass
in the locker room.
139
00:07:08,608 --> 00:07:09,707
Ew, Mom!
140
00:07:09,709 --> 00:07:13,376
Kyle, I am
really trying here.
141
00:07:14,378 --> 00:07:16,412
I know, Mom. Thanks.
142
00:07:16,414 --> 00:07:19,982
Do you have any idea
what it's like to be a gay man
trapped inside a woman's body?
143
00:07:19,984 --> 00:07:21,817
My God,
you have no idea.
144
00:07:21,819 --> 00:07:23,819
Well, there's, like,
five gay men trapped inside me,
145
00:07:23,821 --> 00:07:25,887
and they're all greasy
and having sex with each other
146
00:07:25,889 --> 00:07:28,022
and just trying
to fuck their way out.
147
00:07:28,024 --> 00:07:30,157
Send me an X-ray.
148
00:07:30,159 --> 00:07:32,159
Why are you being
all Fiona Apple?
149
00:07:32,161 --> 00:07:34,661
I broke up with Shane.
He's single?
150
00:07:34,663 --> 00:07:36,329
Hands off, cock-monger.
151
00:07:36,331 --> 00:07:38,164
[laughs]
I'm kidding.
152
00:07:38,166 --> 00:07:40,900
What is it with straight guys
and their aversion
to sucking dick?
153
00:07:40,902 --> 00:07:42,568
I just got dumped.
154
00:07:42,570 --> 00:07:45,003
What is with gay guys
wanting to suck
everyone's dick?
155
00:07:45,005 --> 00:07:47,638
Yeah, I heard.
I'm so sorry.
Thanks.
156
00:07:47,640 --> 00:07:49,039
Sorry you're a psychopath.
157
00:07:49,041 --> 00:07:50,740
I say this with
my trademark sweetness,
158
00:07:50,742 --> 00:07:53,642
but you do know that Marc
was the best thing that will
ever happen to you?
159
00:07:53,644 --> 00:07:56,111
Hey, I'm a catch.
Says who? Your mom?
160
00:07:57,113 --> 00:07:59,581
Other people do, too.
161
00:07:59,583 --> 00:08:01,583
I just...
162
00:08:01,585 --> 00:08:03,651
I just want to hear
"I love you"
163
00:08:03,653 --> 00:08:06,654
instead of "Take it,
you tight little snatch."
164
00:08:06,656 --> 00:08:09,089
Hi, Mr. Thompson.
Tiffani.
165
00:08:09,091 --> 00:08:11,357
Oh, I love your pastel
paisley halter
166
00:08:11,359 --> 00:08:12,691
with the chiffon
inlet overlay.
167
00:08:12,693 --> 00:08:14,192
My wife has one
just like it.
168
00:08:14,194 --> 00:08:15,526
[mouths words]
Okay, class.
169
00:08:15,528 --> 00:08:17,261
Fingertips.
170
00:08:17,263 --> 00:08:19,363
I don't know how many of you
171
00:08:19,365 --> 00:08:22,132
are sick to death
with still life,
172
00:08:22,134 --> 00:08:26,068
but if I see another fruit,
I'm gonna have a hissy.
[apple thuds]
173
00:08:26,070 --> 00:08:29,104
I think it's time
that we tried something
174
00:08:29,106 --> 00:08:31,973
a little more...dangerous.
175
00:08:31,975 --> 00:08:33,741
[door opens]
Class,
176
00:08:33,743 --> 00:08:36,243
meet Troy.
177
00:08:36,245 --> 00:08:38,578
[laughing]
[door closes]
178
00:08:40,314 --> 00:08:42,548
Ta-da!
[chuckling]
179
00:08:43,917 --> 00:08:47,218
Troy's going to model
for us today.
180
00:08:47,220 --> 00:08:48,219
Nude.
181
00:08:49,287 --> 00:08:51,688
Troy is a veterinarian major
182
00:08:51,690 --> 00:08:54,357
who has just
moved here, fresh,
183
00:08:54,359 --> 00:08:56,559
from a little town
in Illinois known as--
184
00:08:56,561 --> 00:08:58,260
Oh, Troy.
185
00:08:58,262 --> 00:08:59,928
[chuckling, muttering]
186
00:08:59,930 --> 00:09:02,830
Troy from Troy.
[laughs]
187
00:09:02,832 --> 00:09:05,199
My parents didn't want me
to forget where I was from.
188
00:09:05,201 --> 00:09:06,733
How rustic.
189
00:09:06,735 --> 00:09:09,001
He's got an accent.
He looks like
he spent his life
190
00:09:09,003 --> 00:09:11,570
baling hay
and milking things.
191
00:09:11,572 --> 00:09:13,071
He looks like sex.
192
00:09:13,073 --> 00:09:16,307
Well, um,
Troy from Illinois.
193
00:09:16,309 --> 00:09:18,142
[laughing, muttering]
194
00:09:18,144 --> 00:09:22,311
Uh, whenever you,
uh, feel inspired.
195
00:09:22,313 --> 00:09:25,314
[laughing]
196
00:09:25,316 --> 00:09:28,550
I, uh...
[clears throat]
197
00:09:33,455 --> 00:09:36,423
So, uh, where
do you want me?
198
00:09:36,425 --> 00:09:38,091
On my face.
199
00:09:38,093 --> 00:09:40,493
[stammers]
Right here on my desk.
200
00:09:40,495 --> 00:09:44,296
And, uh, we'll get you in, um,
several different positions.
201
00:09:44,298 --> 00:09:47,198
Missionary,
reverse cowgirl, 69.
202
00:09:47,200 --> 00:09:48,632
Chalks to paper!
203
00:09:51,802 --> 00:09:53,502
Oops.
[giggles]
204
00:09:53,504 --> 00:09:55,770
Dropped it.
Guess I'll just ha--
205
00:09:55,772 --> 00:09:57,772
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Permit me.
206
00:09:57,774 --> 00:09:58,806
I wouldn't want you
207
00:09:58,808 --> 00:10:01,808
to ruin anybody's art
by moving.
208
00:10:03,744 --> 00:10:05,845
Hi.
[giggles]
209
00:10:09,983 --> 00:10:12,851
Nice to meet you.
210
00:10:12,853 --> 00:10:14,519
Same here.
211
00:10:14,521 --> 00:10:17,455
Okay. I'm just...
212
00:10:17,457 --> 00:10:18,956
Okay.
213
00:10:23,494 --> 00:10:25,495
I want to hit that
harder than Ike hit Tina.
214
00:10:25,497 --> 00:10:28,030
Oh! I want
to be wrapped in his arms
forever and ever.
215
00:10:28,032 --> 00:10:30,732
I want to see him
get it on with his
boyfriend.
216
00:10:30,734 --> 00:10:32,400
You think he's gay?
217
00:10:32,402 --> 00:10:34,702
Does Whitney
want crack?
218
00:10:39,974 --> 00:10:41,941
[gasps]
Hey, there!
219
00:10:41,943 --> 00:10:43,776
I didn't recognize you
without your penis.
220
00:10:43,778 --> 00:10:45,978
I had to leave it there.
School property and all.
221
00:10:45,980 --> 00:10:47,179
I'm Gwen.
222
00:10:47,181 --> 00:10:48,813
The girl with the big boobs
is Tiffani.
223
00:10:48,815 --> 00:10:50,281
The guy with the small pe--
I'm Kyle.
224
00:10:50,283 --> 00:10:51,949
Troy.
225
00:10:51,951 --> 00:10:53,617
From Troy.
Illinois.
226
00:10:54,685 --> 00:10:57,119
[clears throat]
Oh, are those your drawings?
227
00:10:57,121 --> 00:10:58,420
Yeah.
228
00:10:58,422 --> 00:11:02,557
This is mine.
That's Kyle's, and Tiffani's.
229
00:11:02,559 --> 00:11:04,559
I've never drawn one before,
so I figured
230
00:11:04,561 --> 00:11:07,228
that I would
just focus on it.
231
00:11:07,230 --> 00:11:10,297
Well, you're very generous.
I'm a giver.
232
00:11:10,299 --> 00:11:11,464
Aw, this one's incredible.
233
00:11:11,466 --> 00:11:14,967
Thanks.
You just spoke to me.
234
00:11:14,969 --> 00:11:16,735
Are you an art major?
No.
235
00:11:16,737 --> 00:11:18,870
She's undeclared, which is
practically the same thing.
236
00:11:18,872 --> 00:11:20,805
Well, you should be.
237
00:11:20,807 --> 00:11:23,641
How'd you get into
nude modeling?
238
00:11:23,643 --> 00:11:25,476
Well, I grew up
in the country,
239
00:11:25,478 --> 00:11:27,478
and no one's around,
so I just go naked a lot.
240
00:11:27,480 --> 00:11:30,647
Then I bought a Webcam.
I'm so Googling you.
241
00:11:30,649 --> 00:11:33,182
When I moved here,
I found I can get paid
to hang out naked.
242
00:11:33,184 --> 00:11:34,550
I was like, "Sign me up!"
243
00:11:34,552 --> 00:11:35,584
Next stop, porn.
244
00:11:37,086 --> 00:11:38,920
How much does that ass
of yours bring in?
245
00:11:38,922 --> 00:11:42,056
Oh, 50 bucks a class.
Porn pays way better.
246
00:11:42,058 --> 00:11:44,958
Yeah, I'd just as likely do it
for a case of beer or weed.
247
00:11:44,960 --> 00:11:47,493
Ah, noted.
When did you move here?
248
00:11:47,495 --> 00:11:50,062
A couple weeks ago.
All by your lonesome?
249
00:11:50,064 --> 00:11:52,431
Yeah.
I'll bet it was great.
250
00:11:52,433 --> 00:11:54,933
Start over where no one
knows your name.
251
00:11:54,935 --> 00:11:58,169
You can do anything you want
with whomever you want.
252
00:11:58,171 --> 00:11:59,904
I guess.
253
00:11:59,906 --> 00:12:01,739
Kind of miss my mom.
254
00:12:01,741 --> 00:12:03,707
Oh, so you're close
to your mom?
255
00:12:03,709 --> 00:12:05,542
I miss both my parents,
256
00:12:05,544 --> 00:12:07,844
but there's something
about a mom, you know?
257
00:12:07,846 --> 00:12:10,379
A boy needs none other
than the love of his mother.
258
00:12:10,381 --> 00:12:12,681
Yeah.
259
00:12:12,683 --> 00:12:14,783
Hey, we were gonna
go grab some coffee.
You wanna come?
260
00:12:14,785 --> 00:12:17,786
Ah, I got to get home.
But thanks for the offer.
261
00:12:17,788 --> 00:12:20,455
Maybe some other time?
Someone waiting for you
at home?
262
00:12:20,457 --> 00:12:22,190
Uh, my roommate.
263
00:12:22,192 --> 00:12:24,625
He's secretly
in love with me.
264
00:12:24,627 --> 00:12:27,461
I'll see you in class.
Keep up the good work.
265
00:12:27,463 --> 00:12:31,131
Oh, keep up the good penis!
266
00:12:31,133 --> 00:12:32,799
[Man]
Stop the spread of faggotry.
267
00:12:32,801 --> 00:12:34,567
I totally thought
he was a 'mo
268
00:12:34,569 --> 00:12:36,502
till he made that lame
straight-guy joke.
269
00:12:36,504 --> 00:12:39,838
He's an enigma
fucking a riddle
fucking a mystery.
270
00:12:39,840 --> 00:12:41,873
I love being single.
271
00:12:41,875 --> 00:12:43,908
Stop the spread
of faggotry.
272
00:12:43,910 --> 00:12:45,609
But spreading
is my favorite thing.
273
00:12:47,244 --> 00:12:49,545
I'll be praying for you.
274
00:13:02,591 --> 00:13:04,325
[Gwen]
Hold that pose.
275
00:13:04,327 --> 00:13:07,895
Would you boys do me a favor
and just sit there for a minute?
276
00:13:07,897 --> 00:13:09,229
Or 20?
277
00:13:09,231 --> 00:13:10,930
But I want him
out of here in five.
278
00:13:10,932 --> 00:13:13,399
What's her story?
279
00:13:13,401 --> 00:13:15,401
I, uh, used to flirt
with this one,
280
00:13:15,403 --> 00:13:17,770
but we never did anything
'cause I wasn't available.
281
00:13:17,772 --> 00:13:20,405
So we're going to make up
for lost time.
282
00:13:21,407 --> 00:13:23,307
[door opens]
283
00:13:23,309 --> 00:13:24,808
Man whore!
284
00:13:24,810 --> 00:13:26,643
[door closes]
[sighs]
285
00:13:26,645 --> 00:13:28,444
Lucky bastard.
286
00:13:28,446 --> 00:13:30,379
[Kyle]
See that guy over there?
287
00:13:30,381 --> 00:13:32,647
The studly rack of meat
or your loser ex-boyfriend?
288
00:13:32,649 --> 00:13:36,150
The meat rack. Marc pre-cheated
with him and with a couple
of other guys, too.
289
00:13:36,152 --> 00:13:38,152
He pre-cheated?
It's this thing that gays do.
290
00:13:38,154 --> 00:13:40,521
The moment their relationship
starts getting a little rocky,
291
00:13:40,523 --> 00:13:42,623
they start lining up
replacement sex partners.
292
00:13:42,625 --> 00:13:46,159
The second they're single,
it's, "Hey, remember me?
You want some head?"
293
00:13:46,161 --> 00:13:48,094
Your boyfriend's
far too creampuff
to cheat.
294
00:13:48,096 --> 00:13:49,929
I didn't say he cheated.
He pre-cheated.
295
00:13:49,931 --> 00:13:51,997
God, you're paranoid.
I know how his mind works.
296
00:13:51,999 --> 00:13:53,932
If I were hot enough,
I'd do the same thing.
297
00:13:53,934 --> 00:13:56,134
I guess it's over.
298
00:13:56,136 --> 00:13:58,269
Look what I found!
Hey.
299
00:13:58,271 --> 00:14:00,838
Troy!
Nude guy!
300
00:14:00,840 --> 00:14:03,974
So, Troy, the three of us
are falling behind in art class,
and we were wondering...
301
00:14:06,577 --> 00:14:07,710
Do you have
a preference?
302
00:14:07,712 --> 00:14:09,645
Uh...
303
00:14:09,647 --> 00:14:13,448
[coughing]
304
00:14:13,450 --> 00:14:16,150
See? It works.
305
00:14:16,152 --> 00:14:17,451
Now take off
your clothes, damn it.
306
00:14:18,453 --> 00:14:20,120
This is kind of weird.
307
00:14:20,122 --> 00:14:21,955
No. Come on.
We're just gonna draw, really.
308
00:14:25,059 --> 00:14:27,527
So, did you leave someone
special back home?
309
00:14:27,529 --> 00:14:28,628
Nope.
310
00:14:28,630 --> 00:14:30,997
That's probably good.
Yep.
311
00:14:30,999 --> 00:14:33,866
I've always wondered
what it would be like
to live on a farm.
312
00:14:33,868 --> 00:14:35,901
I mean,
what did you do for fun?
313
00:14:35,903 --> 00:14:39,070
Mostly, we'd just drive around
the strip on weekends
314
00:14:39,072 --> 00:14:41,839
or-- or throw parties
in some field.
315
00:14:41,841 --> 00:14:44,741
I always liked the idea
of being out among all
the nature,
316
00:14:44,743 --> 00:14:46,976
getting fucked
in a rainstorm,
317
00:14:46,978 --> 00:14:48,377
getting fucked
in a tractor,
318
00:14:48,379 --> 00:14:50,312
getting fucked in a...
319
00:14:50,314 --> 00:14:52,047
[laughs]
Can't say I did all that.
320
00:14:52,049 --> 00:14:54,716
Well, where did you
get fucked?
I don't know.
321
00:14:54,718 --> 00:14:57,218
Regular places.
Bed.
322
00:14:57,220 --> 00:14:58,819
My car.
In the ass?
323
00:14:58,821 --> 00:15:00,420
Excuse me?
324
00:15:00,422 --> 00:15:03,055
Oops. I mean,
boys or girls?
325
00:15:03,057 --> 00:15:04,923
Uh...
326
00:15:04,925 --> 00:15:08,393
Uh, I'm sorry. If you don't
want to talk about this...
327
00:15:08,395 --> 00:15:10,795
No, it's-- it's okay,
I guess.
328
00:15:10,797 --> 00:15:12,797
Girls,
329
00:15:12,799 --> 00:15:14,165
mostly.
330
00:15:14,167 --> 00:15:15,533
[gasping]
331
00:15:15,535 --> 00:15:18,502
Why? Does that freak you out?
Oh, honey, no.
332
00:15:18,504 --> 00:15:22,005
I'm what they call a fag hag.
So you are gay, then.
333
00:15:22,007 --> 00:15:24,540
I am...
I'm not gay. It's just...
334
00:15:24,542 --> 00:15:27,709
Well, all kinds of people
hit on me,
335
00:15:27,711 --> 00:15:29,544
so I just kind of
go along with it.
336
00:15:29,546 --> 00:15:30,778
What the hell
does that mean?
337
00:15:30,780 --> 00:15:32,279
I like it.
338
00:15:32,281 --> 00:15:34,648
I mean,
we're all just people.
339
00:15:34,650 --> 00:15:37,717
Just bodies
with organic needs.
340
00:15:37,719 --> 00:15:39,885
So, did you ever
have a girlfriend?
Sort of.
341
00:15:39,887 --> 00:15:42,988
What about boyfriends?
342
00:15:42,990 --> 00:15:46,157
Well, I-- I had
this really close friend
in high school.
343
00:15:46,159 --> 00:15:48,259
But I never done much
with a guy before,
344
00:15:48,261 --> 00:15:50,227
'cause I want to get married
and have kids.
345
00:15:50,229 --> 00:15:53,230
Not that gay guys can't,
'cause they can.
346
00:15:53,232 --> 00:15:54,898
It's just...
347
00:15:54,900 --> 00:15:56,900
I don't know.
348
00:15:56,902 --> 00:16:00,069
Being gay just seems
like so much work.
Amen, sister.
349
00:16:00,071 --> 00:16:02,404
First, you have to
tell everyone.
That's no fun.
350
00:16:02,406 --> 00:16:04,572
And then
there's rejection.
You're never hot enough.
351
00:16:04,574 --> 00:16:06,440
STDs.
If you're lucky.
352
00:16:06,442 --> 00:16:08,575
There's this group--
Coming In.
353
00:16:08,577 --> 00:16:11,311
I kind of wanna go
check 'em out, 'cause I
think they might fix me.
354
00:16:11,313 --> 00:16:13,813
The antigays?
Ex-gays.
355
00:16:13,815 --> 00:16:16,916
Just like you, Kyle, right?
What?
356
00:16:16,918 --> 00:16:19,418
What?
Kyle used to be gay.
357
00:16:19,420 --> 00:16:22,454
[gasps]
You two should hang out,
get to know each other,
358
00:16:22,456 --> 00:16:24,989
swap stories.
[nervous chuckle]
359
00:16:24,991 --> 00:16:26,924
You're an ex-gay?
360
00:16:28,293 --> 00:16:30,927
[Kyle]
Well...
361
00:16:30,929 --> 00:16:33,029
You're, like, my idol.
362
00:16:33,031 --> 00:16:35,297
I totally just wanna get inside
of you and learn everything.
363
00:16:35,299 --> 00:16:37,132
Uh...
364
00:16:38,434 --> 00:16:39,801
Oh, my God!
365
00:16:41,603 --> 00:16:43,436
You two are together, right?
366
00:16:46,306 --> 00:16:48,140
Yes. Yes.
Yeah.
367
00:16:48,142 --> 00:16:50,008
We are boyfriend
and girlfriend.
368
00:16:50,010 --> 00:16:51,676
God, I knew it!
369
00:16:51,678 --> 00:16:53,544
You're always together,
but I wasn't sure.
370
00:16:53,546 --> 00:16:56,046
It must've been the...
The fact that I act so faggy?
371
00:16:57,282 --> 00:16:58,881
And you're
really straight now?
372
00:17:01,117 --> 00:17:02,383
As a cucumber.
373
00:17:02,385 --> 00:17:05,452
God! No wonder I felt
so comfortable with you two.
374
00:17:05,454 --> 00:17:08,254
How long you been together?
Uh...
375
00:17:08,256 --> 00:17:10,089
a few months.
Yeah.
376
00:17:10,091 --> 00:17:13,325
And it's true love.
Open up, my little sex monkey.
Oh! Oh, God!
377
00:17:13,327 --> 00:17:15,327
[nervous laugh]
[forced laugh]
378
00:17:15,329 --> 00:17:17,028
You're comfortable
that he used to...
379
00:17:17,030 --> 00:17:18,696
Smoke sausage?
380
00:17:18,698 --> 00:17:20,597
You know, we've all got
skeletons in our closet.
381
00:17:20,599 --> 00:17:23,166
His are just more well hung.
And how's that going for you?
382
00:17:23,168 --> 00:17:26,002
Well, how do you think
it's going for him?
Look at me. I'm perfect.
383
00:17:26,004 --> 00:17:28,371
Yeah. Yeah, she's awesome.
384
00:17:28,373 --> 00:17:31,940
Oh! He especially loves
my titties.
[shudders]
385
00:17:31,942 --> 00:17:33,374
Breasts!
386
00:17:33,376 --> 00:17:34,942
So, what are the meetings like?
387
00:17:34,944 --> 00:17:38,712
Oh, uh, you know, I've never
been to this chapter.
I don't--
388
00:17:38,714 --> 00:17:43,116
Oh, my God. Would you do me
the biggest favor?
Of course I'd do you...
389
00:17:43,118 --> 00:17:45,785
You have to take me
to one of these meetings.
There's one tomorrow.
390
00:17:45,787 --> 00:17:48,020
You could be, like,
my-- my sponsor or whatever.
391
00:17:48,022 --> 00:17:49,521
You know, honey, do it.
392
00:17:49,523 --> 00:17:52,657
It might do you some good
to renew your vows
to heterosexuality.
393
00:17:52,659 --> 00:17:54,692
Not that he doesn't
ride me every night.
394
00:17:54,694 --> 00:17:56,293
[chuckles]
395
00:17:56,295 --> 00:17:58,895
Uh, okay.
396
00:17:58,897 --> 00:18:01,130
It's a date!
[chuckles]
397
00:18:01,132 --> 00:18:03,098
I'll be right back.
I have to go use the head.
398
00:18:06,735 --> 00:18:08,402
What the hell
just happened?
399
00:18:08,404 --> 00:18:10,404
We just got you laid
by Troy from Illinois.
400
00:18:10,406 --> 00:18:13,840
You made me into an ex-gay.
Those are my least
favorite kinds of gays.
401
00:18:13,842 --> 00:18:15,675
Grow some nuts.
Do you think
he would've been
402
00:18:15,677 --> 00:18:18,344
remotely interested
in you if you were
just another gay guy?
403
00:18:18,346 --> 00:18:19,845
Listen to me.
404
00:18:19,847 --> 00:18:22,080
I don't have a chance
in this godforsaken world
405
00:18:22,082 --> 00:18:25,316
of wrapping my lips
around his 40 acres and a mule,
but you do.
406
00:18:25,318 --> 00:18:28,852
So you're saying
he'll let me have sex with him
because I'm not gay?
407
00:18:28,854 --> 00:18:31,921
You heard him.
You'll be his new
close friend.
408
00:18:31,923 --> 00:18:35,024
Since you're straight,
you'll get to hang out
with him.
409
00:18:35,026 --> 00:18:38,027
You'll support him
in all those straight
emo bonding ways
410
00:18:38,029 --> 00:18:39,395
until, eventually,
411
00:18:39,397 --> 00:18:42,831
all his repressed passion
explodes!
412
00:18:42,833 --> 00:18:45,567
Right down
your throat.
413
00:18:45,569 --> 00:18:48,436
This is sick.
You're both sick!
414
00:18:49,438 --> 00:18:51,439
You think it could work?
415
00:18:56,211 --> 00:18:57,711
Damn!
416
00:19:01,214 --> 00:19:02,480
Hey.
417
00:19:02,482 --> 00:19:05,149
No way.
418
00:19:05,151 --> 00:19:08,218
I'm so nervous.
It's okay.
419
00:19:08,220 --> 00:19:09,552
You'll be fine.
420
00:19:11,755 --> 00:19:15,124
What are you doing?
Straight-male bonding.
Just have fun.
421
00:19:24,533 --> 00:19:27,067
[chattering]
422
00:19:34,474 --> 00:19:35,640
Hi.
423
00:19:35,642 --> 00:19:36,807
[Men]
Hi.
424
00:19:36,809 --> 00:19:39,409
I'm Octavio.
[Man]
Octavio.
425
00:19:39,411 --> 00:19:42,145
Introductions lead
to conversations,
426
00:19:42,147 --> 00:19:45,281
lead to invitations
of intercourse
with the wrong persuasion.
427
00:19:45,283 --> 00:19:47,082
I'll do the introducing.
428
00:19:47,084 --> 00:19:49,317
What the hell do you want?
429
00:19:49,319 --> 00:19:51,519
Oh, uh...
We want to join.
430
00:19:51,521 --> 00:19:53,521
I find that hard to believe.
431
00:19:53,523 --> 00:19:55,556
Maybe we should leave.
God believes me.
432
00:19:55,558 --> 00:19:57,624
Well, I did pray for you.
433
00:19:57,626 --> 00:19:58,825
I know.
434
00:19:58,827 --> 00:20:00,426
Spooky.
435
00:20:00,428 --> 00:20:03,429
I'm Jacob Buchanan,
Coming In president.
436
00:20:03,431 --> 00:20:07,132
This is Derek, Allan,
Roy and, uh...
437
00:20:07,134 --> 00:20:08,266
Violet.
438
00:20:08,268 --> 00:20:09,500
Violet.
439
00:20:09,502 --> 00:20:11,602
Well, I'm Kyle, and...
Troy.
440
00:20:11,604 --> 00:20:13,637
[all]
Hi, Troy.
Hi.
441
00:20:13,639 --> 00:20:16,072
Hello, Kyle.
[Jacob]
You do know
442
00:20:16,074 --> 00:20:18,808
what we're all about here,
right, at Coming In?
443
00:20:18,810 --> 00:20:22,311
Well, yeah, but he
doesn't need to be here.
444
00:20:22,313 --> 00:20:25,647
He's a success story.
[nervous chuckle]
445
00:20:25,649 --> 00:20:28,249
Kyle's renouncing
his sexuality?
446
00:20:28,251 --> 00:20:31,151
What's going on?
Are you sitting down?
447
00:20:31,153 --> 00:20:34,220
Now, who'd like to speak first?
Okay, I will.
448
00:20:34,222 --> 00:20:37,556
I have some great news
that is gonna change
all of our lives.
449
00:20:37,558 --> 00:20:40,525
I have been asked
to present
450
00:20:40,527 --> 00:20:43,895
the new ad campaign
for Coming In National.
451
00:20:43,897 --> 00:20:47,764
The board of directors,
including my mom,
is gonna be here next week,
452
00:20:47,766 --> 00:20:49,532
and if they like
my presentation,
453
00:20:49,534 --> 00:20:51,233
which they will,
454
00:20:51,235 --> 00:20:52,934
you're gonna see my posters
455
00:20:52,936 --> 00:20:54,902
in high schools
and college campuses
456
00:20:54,904 --> 00:20:57,404
across the nation.
457
00:20:57,406 --> 00:21:02,908
"Homo no more.
Stop the spread of faggotry."
458
00:21:02,910 --> 00:21:07,012
Now, I need you to repeat
this slogan to every student
across campus.
459
00:21:07,014 --> 00:21:11,316
"Homo no more" is gonna become
a national catchphrase.
460
00:21:11,318 --> 00:21:14,052
Like,
"Can you hear me now?"
461
00:21:14,054 --> 00:21:16,120
Yeah, only more clever.
462
00:21:16,122 --> 00:21:19,690
So, let's have a testimonial.
Who wants to start?
463
00:21:26,030 --> 00:21:27,530
I sucked a dick.
464
00:21:27,532 --> 00:21:29,431
Shut up.
Are you serious?
465
00:21:29,433 --> 00:21:31,433
Like a fox.
That's fabulous.
466
00:21:31,435 --> 00:21:33,168
What was it like?
Details.
467
00:21:33,170 --> 00:21:36,304
Yeah, yeah.
Well, tell us how it
made you feel, Violet.
468
00:21:36,306 --> 00:21:38,906
Well, I got really trashed
469
00:21:38,908 --> 00:21:40,507
at the Up With Jesus kegger,
470
00:21:40,509 --> 00:21:42,575
and this skinny guy
471
00:21:42,577 --> 00:21:44,677
with dyed black hair
and lipstick
472
00:21:44,679 --> 00:21:48,013
asked if I wanted
to do one of those
upside-down keg shooters.
473
00:21:48,015 --> 00:21:53,017
They started playing
My Chemical Romance,
so I took that as a sign.
474
00:21:53,019 --> 00:21:57,487
Downed half the keg,
and before I knew it, we were
in the back of his mom's Saab--
475
00:21:57,489 --> 00:21:59,989
choking on his dick,
476
00:21:59,991 --> 00:22:03,459
my makeup smearing,
I'm about to puke.
477
00:22:03,461 --> 00:22:05,127
It was great.
478
00:22:05,129 --> 00:22:06,862
I watched porn.
479
00:22:08,564 --> 00:22:11,132
Straight porn.
And I made sure
it was Ron Jeremy,
480
00:22:11,134 --> 00:22:12,666
so I wouldn't focus
on his, um...
481
00:22:12,668 --> 00:22:14,100
Yeah.
Yeah.
482
00:22:15,168 --> 00:22:17,402
And it was hot.
483
00:22:17,404 --> 00:22:20,104
Good. Good.
484
00:22:20,106 --> 00:22:22,806
Allan, how are
things going with, um...
485
00:22:22,808 --> 00:22:24,674
Was her name Leslie?
486
00:22:24,676 --> 00:22:27,510
I think so. Yeah.
487
00:22:27,512 --> 00:22:29,545
Uh, we went on a date.
488
00:22:29,547 --> 00:22:31,213
And what happened
on this date?
489
00:22:31,215 --> 00:22:33,682
We went to this cute
little Italian restaurant.
490
00:22:33,684 --> 00:22:34,849
Service was great.
491
00:22:34,851 --> 00:22:36,584
No. No, no.
I meant physically.
492
00:22:36,586 --> 00:22:39,286
Oh, well, um,
493
00:22:39,288 --> 00:22:41,788
after dinner,
we went back to her dorm.
494
00:22:41,790 --> 00:22:44,290
Were you nervous?
Oh, yeah.
495
00:22:44,292 --> 00:22:46,225
Turned on?
Well...
496
00:22:46,227 --> 00:22:48,193
I'm trusting at some point
you got turned on, right?
497
00:22:48,195 --> 00:22:51,562
Oh, yeah! Yeah!
498
00:22:51,564 --> 00:22:53,196
[chuckles]
499
00:22:53,198 --> 00:22:58,033
Totally...turned on.
Rock hard.
500
00:22:58,035 --> 00:23:00,068
Tell me about that.
501
00:23:00,070 --> 00:23:04,338
Uh, um, let's see.
[chuckles]
502
00:23:04,340 --> 00:23:06,106
We sat on her bed,
503
00:23:06,108 --> 00:23:07,807
and she showed me
this photo album she had
504
00:23:07,809 --> 00:23:10,342
of this Japanese internment
camp she had visited.
505
00:23:10,344 --> 00:23:15,045
And we were balancing
the book on our legs,
506
00:23:15,047 --> 00:23:17,280
and her knee
grazed my knee,
507
00:23:17,282 --> 00:23:19,949
and that kind of
got me going.
[laughs]
508
00:23:19,951 --> 00:23:21,383
And then?
509
00:23:21,385 --> 00:23:22,884
Then?
510
00:23:25,320 --> 00:23:28,255
She jumped
on top of me.
511
00:23:28,257 --> 00:23:29,389
Really?
512
00:23:29,391 --> 00:23:32,158
And, uh, I let her
kiss me and stuff.
513
00:23:32,160 --> 00:23:35,995
Good! Good.
Now, did she go for second base?
514
00:23:35,997 --> 00:23:39,897
Run her hands up and down
your smooth chest
underneath your shirt?
515
00:23:39,899 --> 00:23:41,899
A little.
516
00:23:43,501 --> 00:23:45,768
Might not count.
Why don't you show me?
517
00:23:49,339 --> 00:23:51,907
Like...this, I guess.
518
00:23:56,178 --> 00:23:58,712
[Jacob]
But never the nipples?
No.
519
00:23:58,714 --> 00:24:01,448
On this date,
did you think about men?
520
00:24:01,450 --> 00:24:03,950
No. No.
Never?
521
00:24:03,952 --> 00:24:05,851
What about
your locker room fantasy?
522
00:24:05,853 --> 00:24:09,954
Thrusting jockstraps,
towels snapping at your ass.
523
00:24:11,056 --> 00:24:13,223
I never said anything
about towels.
524
00:24:13,225 --> 00:24:15,391
Well...
525
00:24:15,393 --> 00:24:16,692
next week's assignment--
526
00:24:16,694 --> 00:24:19,261
and I'm holding you to this--
is third base.
527
00:24:19,263 --> 00:24:21,463
But what about the girl?
528
00:24:21,465 --> 00:24:23,731
Leslie?
Yeah, Leslie.
529
00:24:23,733 --> 00:24:26,233
Shouldn't I respect her
and stuff?
Don't worry.
530
00:24:26,235 --> 00:24:28,235
She's not gonna get pregnant.
531
00:24:28,237 --> 00:24:30,537
All I'm asking for
is one finger...
532
00:24:30,539 --> 00:24:32,572
[swooshing sound]
in her bush.
533
00:24:34,141 --> 00:24:37,443
So, I'm fascinated to hear
your guys's stories.
534
00:24:37,445 --> 00:24:39,978
I'm not ready
to talk yet.
535
00:24:39,980 --> 00:24:42,380
But, uh, Kyle here
has got a hottie girlfriend,
536
00:24:42,382 --> 00:24:45,449
and they can't keep
their hands off each other.
537
00:24:45,451 --> 00:24:48,718
You...have a girlfriend?
Mm-hmm.
538
00:24:48,720 --> 00:24:51,321
And you used to be gay?
Yeah.
539
00:24:51,323 --> 00:24:53,756
Well, why don't you
tell us, Kyle,
540
00:24:53,758 --> 00:24:55,691
what brought about
this amazing change?
541
00:24:55,693 --> 00:24:59,628
Uh, my story...
542
00:24:59,630 --> 00:25:02,897
Just speak from the heart,
like Jesus would.
543
00:25:05,467 --> 00:25:07,134
Well, I was...
544
00:25:07,136 --> 00:25:09,436
pretty much born gay.
545
00:25:09,438 --> 00:25:10,837
Mom said
my first sentence was,
546
00:25:10,839 --> 00:25:13,172
"Get those boobs
out of my face," so...
547
00:25:13,174 --> 00:25:17,041
Anyway, uh,
I lived the gay lifestyle
for a while,
548
00:25:17,043 --> 00:25:19,042
and I dated
a lot of guys.
549
00:25:21,445 --> 00:25:24,914
A lot...of guys.
550
00:25:24,916 --> 00:25:27,416
Just mens
and mens and mens.
551
00:25:27,418 --> 00:25:29,351
I mean, they were calling me
all the time.
552
00:25:29,353 --> 00:25:31,720
"Kyle, please have sex
with me. Please!"
553
00:25:31,722 --> 00:25:34,823
I was so popular.
[Jacob] But then it began
to take its toll.
554
00:25:34,825 --> 00:25:37,625
See, you realized that gays--
555
00:25:37,627 --> 00:25:39,793
they're not interested
in getting to know you.
556
00:25:39,795 --> 00:25:42,395
No, as soon as you put out,
they vanish,
557
00:25:42,397 --> 00:25:45,398
and then they never
call you back when they say
they're gonna call you back,
558
00:25:45,400 --> 00:25:47,566
because they're out
with some stud
559
00:25:47,568 --> 00:25:50,802
when they say
they should be in class!
560
00:25:50,804 --> 00:25:52,603
I wouldn't say that.
561
00:25:52,605 --> 00:25:54,938
Well, then, what exactly
would you say, Kyle?
562
00:25:54,940 --> 00:25:57,406
What brought about
this amazing transformation?
563
00:25:59,609 --> 00:26:01,943
Well, I got fed up
564
00:26:01,945 --> 00:26:05,313
with the men
and the sex and the fun,
565
00:26:05,315 --> 00:26:07,415
the music
and the apple martinis.
566
00:26:07,417 --> 00:26:09,784
And just when
I didn't know what else to do,
567
00:26:09,786 --> 00:26:12,453
an angel from heaven above
flew into my life.
568
00:26:12,455 --> 00:26:17,924
A sexy 52-24-48 angel
named Tiffani.
569
00:26:17,926 --> 00:26:20,593
Is Tiffani a rhinoceros?
Size doesn't matter.
570
00:26:20,595 --> 00:26:23,629
What matters is,
is that I fell in love,
and I never looked back.
571
00:26:24,697 --> 00:26:25,697
Oh, stop.
572
00:26:27,833 --> 00:26:29,600
But what about the sex?
573
00:26:29,602 --> 00:26:32,169
Oh, it's a piece of cake.
I just say, "Kyle,
574
00:26:32,171 --> 00:26:35,472
"take everything you love
about Reese Witherspoon
and project it
575
00:26:35,474 --> 00:26:37,440
onto this girl
who wants to be with you."
576
00:26:37,442 --> 00:26:38,841
And now I can't get enough.
577
00:26:38,843 --> 00:26:40,142
That's incredible.
578
00:26:40,144 --> 00:26:41,543
Yeah, 'cause you seem
really gay.
579
00:26:41,545 --> 00:26:44,245
Not anymore. I'm telling you,
there is nothing
580
00:26:44,247 --> 00:26:47,214
like the smooth, wet,
porcelain lips of the vagina
581
00:26:47,216 --> 00:26:49,149
spreading and enveloping me,
582
00:26:49,151 --> 00:26:52,518
squeezing against
the head of my dick
ever so firmly.
583
00:26:53,786 --> 00:26:55,119
And that's nothing
584
00:26:55,121 --> 00:26:57,988
compared to what it feels like
to eat her out
585
00:26:57,990 --> 00:27:00,857
and lap up
all those fresh juices.
586
00:27:00,859 --> 00:27:02,325
[coughing]
587
00:27:02,327 --> 00:27:04,192
[snaps fingers]
588
00:27:06,895 --> 00:27:08,896
Well, we look forward
to seeing you both again.
589
00:27:08,898 --> 00:27:10,831
Well, we both look forward
to coming.
� ["Hallelujah Chorus"]
590
00:27:10,833 --> 00:27:13,834
With girls.
A little ex-gay joke.
591
00:27:13,836 --> 00:27:16,503
Jesus now
will be keeping
an eye on you.
592
00:27:16,505 --> 00:27:19,706
Hey! Stop the spread
of faggotry.
593
00:27:19,708 --> 00:27:21,207
[Man]
Fuck off, man.
594
00:27:21,209 --> 00:27:23,142
That was fun!
That was nerve-racking.
595
00:27:23,144 --> 00:27:26,478
Yeah, you were sweating
like a suicide bomber
on a summer jihad.
596
00:27:26,480 --> 00:27:29,214
Man, I love your...
597
00:27:29,216 --> 00:27:31,583
sense of humor.
598
00:27:31,585 --> 00:27:33,084
Man, you really dig
your pussy.
599
00:27:33,086 --> 00:27:35,853
Yeah. So, what are
you up to now?
600
00:27:35,855 --> 00:27:38,655
I gotta go model
for Mr. Thompson's art class.
601
00:27:38,657 --> 00:27:41,858
Hey, uh, are we still on
for tomorrow's game?
602
00:27:41,860 --> 00:27:44,093
Go, local sports team!
603
00:27:44,095 --> 00:27:45,427
[laughs]
604
00:28:10,018 --> 00:28:12,953
This must be
the right place.
Hey.
605
00:28:12,955 --> 00:28:17,289
Hey, I'm Marc,
Professor Thompson's
next top model.
606
00:28:17,291 --> 00:28:20,125
But I use the word
"top" loosely.
607
00:28:20,127 --> 00:28:22,560
Wow, great body.
Yeah, I know.
608
00:28:22,562 --> 00:28:24,295
I meant you.
609
00:28:24,297 --> 00:28:26,030
Oh. Oh, thanks.
610
00:28:26,032 --> 00:28:28,065
You're, uh,
supposed to wear it
over your shoulders.
611
00:28:28,067 --> 00:28:29,866
What?
The robe.
612
00:28:30,868 --> 00:28:33,135
Oh. Yeah.
613
00:28:33,137 --> 00:28:36,037
Did you want some privacy?
'Cause I could come back.
614
00:28:36,039 --> 00:28:39,040
No. No. I'm gonna be naked
in front of 15 people.
615
00:28:39,042 --> 00:28:42,109
You're easy.
How would you know?
616
00:28:42,111 --> 00:28:45,145
No, I-- I wouldn't.
617
00:28:45,147 --> 00:28:47,213
Anyway, we're gonna be naked
in front of 15 people.
618
00:28:47,215 --> 00:28:49,148
Huh?
We're posing together.
619
00:28:49,150 --> 00:28:51,216
Seriously?
You got a problem with that?
620
00:28:51,218 --> 00:28:53,952
No, of-- of course not.
621
00:28:58,557 --> 00:28:59,890
Are you gay?
622
00:28:59,892 --> 00:29:02,792
Well, yeah.
You got a problem with that?
623
00:29:02,794 --> 00:29:05,394
N-No, I-- I don't
have a problem with that.
624
00:29:05,396 --> 00:29:07,462
I mean, you're not straight,
are you?
625
00:29:08,464 --> 00:29:10,798
Well...
626
00:29:10,800 --> 00:29:13,400
Oh, my heck!
Who-- Who are you?
627
00:29:13,402 --> 00:29:16,903
Uh, I'm Marc,
your model.
628
00:29:16,905 --> 00:29:19,472
You are?
Well, what about him?
629
00:29:19,474 --> 00:29:22,174
You didn't request
two models for today?
630
00:29:22,176 --> 00:29:24,342
I have the Student Services req
in here.
631
00:29:24,344 --> 00:29:25,910
Nice.
632
00:29:25,912 --> 00:29:27,311
What?
What?
633
00:29:27,313 --> 00:29:29,313
I can't find it.
634
00:29:29,315 --> 00:29:32,949
I mean, I guess if you
don't need two nudes today,
I can leave.
635
00:29:32,951 --> 00:29:35,818
Oh, n-n-- Okay, okay.
I know what.
636
00:29:35,820 --> 00:29:38,787
Yeah. 'Cause I-- I do need
both-- both of-- both models.
637
00:29:38,789 --> 00:29:41,322
[stammers]
Nude. In five minutes.
638
00:29:41,324 --> 00:29:44,325
[laughs]
I'd forget head
if it wasn't on top of me.
639
00:29:44,327 --> 00:29:47,227
What?
[stammering]
640
00:29:47,229 --> 00:29:50,463
I would forget my head
if it wasn't on top of me.
641
00:29:50,465 --> 00:29:54,065
[laughs]
My wife is always
correcting my grammar.
642
00:29:54,067 --> 00:29:55,266
You know I'm, uh...
643
00:29:55,268 --> 00:29:57,434
[clears throat]
I am, um-- I'm married.
644
00:29:57,436 --> 00:30:00,970
I don't know
if you know that.
Oh, okay.
645
00:30:00,972 --> 00:30:04,873
You guys...carry on.
[laughs]
646
00:30:04,875 --> 00:30:08,442
I'll, uh...
I'll get the class ready.
647
00:30:11,345 --> 00:30:13,446
So, what's
your name again?
648
00:30:13,448 --> 00:30:14,814
Troy.
649
00:30:14,816 --> 00:30:17,016
And you're Marc.
650
00:30:17,018 --> 00:30:19,785
With a C.
Pretty gay, huh?
651
00:30:19,787 --> 00:30:22,921
[chuckles]
Yeah.
652
00:30:22,923 --> 00:30:26,591
Look, dude, if you're worried
about me looking at your dick,
I can turn around.
653
00:30:26,593 --> 00:30:29,293
But, I mean, don't sweat it.
You're not my type.
654
00:30:29,295 --> 00:30:30,894
I'm not?
655
00:30:30,896 --> 00:30:34,631
No. Should you be?
No, I guess not.
656
00:30:34,633 --> 00:30:38,468
I mean, you're hot and all,
but I like guys
who can take charge.
657
00:30:40,003 --> 00:30:43,804
Plus, your hair is too dark.
And you're too tall.
658
00:30:43,806 --> 00:30:46,139
[chuckles]
Gee, thanks.
659
00:30:46,141 --> 00:30:49,976
Just being honest with you.
I think it's great-- types.
660
00:30:49,978 --> 00:30:53,178
I mean, if we all wanted
the same thing,
might as well be straight.
661
00:30:54,847 --> 00:30:57,648
Maybe not everyone knows
what their type is.
662
00:30:57,650 --> 00:31:00,450
True enough.
663
00:31:00,452 --> 00:31:02,718
There was this one guy...
664
00:31:02,720 --> 00:31:05,320
This sounds stupid,
but when I met him,
665
00:31:05,322 --> 00:31:09,223
I sort of saw something
in his soul, like a light.
666
00:31:09,225 --> 00:31:12,492
And physically,
he was nothing like any
of the guys I dated before.
667
00:31:12,494 --> 00:31:16,595
But when I saw that light,
I realized...
668
00:31:16,597 --> 00:31:19,030
this is my type, too.
669
00:31:19,032 --> 00:31:21,532
I asked him out, eventually.
670
00:31:21,534 --> 00:31:23,066
That's deep.
671
00:31:23,068 --> 00:31:24,734
Fuck you.
672
00:31:24,736 --> 00:31:26,969
No, I'm serious.
That's...
673
00:31:26,971 --> 00:31:29,104
So, whatever happened
to your soul man?
674
00:31:29,106 --> 00:31:32,006
Doesn't matter.
675
00:31:32,008 --> 00:31:35,542
Anyway, that's...
676
00:31:35,544 --> 00:31:37,210
ancient history.
677
00:31:38,212 --> 00:31:40,680
Hey, you need
a workout buddy?
678
00:31:40,682 --> 00:31:42,114
Yeah.
679
00:31:43,116 --> 00:31:44,749
[Kyle]This feels horrible.
680
00:31:44,751 --> 00:31:47,785
Stop shaking
your ass so much.
No, I mean lying to Troy.
681
00:31:47,787 --> 00:31:51,321
Honey, men lie.
And you're a man, technically.
682
00:31:51,323 --> 00:31:53,323
Well, tonight,
you better not forget to...
683
00:31:53,325 --> 00:31:55,325
Fuck!
Oh, honey, I never
forget to fuck.
684
00:31:55,327 --> 00:31:56,693
No, "fuck," as in...
685
00:31:56,695 --> 00:31:58,027
Kyle.
686
00:31:58,029 --> 00:32:01,096
Well, hey, boys,
what's up?
687
00:32:01,098 --> 00:32:03,131
Oh, you two
know Marc?
688
00:32:03,133 --> 00:32:05,133
I used to have
a big crush on Kyle.
689
00:32:05,135 --> 00:32:08,035
Didn't I?
But he's not
your type at all.
690
00:32:08,037 --> 00:32:10,470
So, how do you two
know each other?
691
00:32:10,472 --> 00:32:12,538
We got naked together
last night.
What?
692
00:32:12,540 --> 00:32:14,706
Yeah, we both model
for Mr. Thompson.
693
00:32:14,708 --> 00:32:16,774
Ah. Well, he's a regular
Gus Van Sant.
694
00:32:16,776 --> 00:32:18,274
Can I talk to you
for a second?
695
00:32:20,577 --> 00:32:22,611
You haven't fucked him yet.
696
00:32:22,613 --> 00:32:24,479
Hey, I don't treat people
like pieces of meat.
697
00:32:24,481 --> 00:32:25,880
Well, you should.
It's fun.
698
00:32:25,882 --> 00:32:28,048
You do know
he's gay, right?
699
00:32:28,050 --> 00:32:30,884
Oh, God, I'm sorry.
Is that against the rules?
700
00:32:30,886 --> 00:32:32,819
Dude, that's the only
fucking rule!
701
00:32:32,821 --> 00:32:36,255
Keep away from hot gay guys
unless they have girlfriends
like me.
702
00:32:36,257 --> 00:32:40,491
Okay, okay. Well,
don't queen out about it.
703
00:32:40,493 --> 00:32:42,659
Besides, he told me
I'm not his type.
704
00:32:42,661 --> 00:32:44,193
And you believed him?
705
00:32:44,195 --> 00:32:46,663
I bet he told you he saw
a light in your soul, too.
706
00:32:46,665 --> 00:32:50,033
Kyle, I think your girlfriend's
getting jealous.
707
00:32:50,035 --> 00:32:52,735
Oh, please.
She trusts me completely.
708
00:32:52,737 --> 00:32:56,505
We're stronger than ever.
In fact, we were just
about to...fuck.
709
00:32:56,507 --> 00:32:58,240
Whoa.
Really?
710
00:32:58,242 --> 00:33:02,510
Yeah. I can hardly
keep my fingers off
his big, hard stick,
711
00:33:02,512 --> 00:33:04,111
especially when he's all...
[inhales sharply]
712
00:33:04,113 --> 00:33:05,846
sweaty from power walking.
713
00:33:05,848 --> 00:33:08,949
I'll bet.
Go for it.
714
00:33:08,951 --> 00:33:10,216
What?
715
00:33:10,218 --> 00:33:13,185
Stick your hand
in his shorts.
716
00:33:13,187 --> 00:33:14,786
Get him hard.
Yeah.
717
00:33:14,788 --> 00:33:18,022
No way.
What? Aren't you
straight anymore?
718
00:33:18,024 --> 00:33:20,524
Of course I'm straight.
I just don't think parading
719
00:33:20,526 --> 00:33:23,360
my heterosexuality around
in public is very polite.
720
00:33:23,362 --> 00:33:26,463
Well, then, how about
you two just kiss?
721
00:33:26,465 --> 00:33:28,798
Yeah, that'd be hot.
Yeah.
722
00:33:28,800 --> 00:33:30,032
A kiss.
723
00:33:30,034 --> 00:33:31,967
And use some tongue.
724
00:33:31,969 --> 00:33:34,202
Unless you don't like
kissing your girlfriend.
725
00:33:34,204 --> 00:33:36,204
Oh, I love kissing
my girlfriend.
726
00:33:36,206 --> 00:33:37,705
Prove it.
727
00:33:39,441 --> 00:33:41,375
Oh, why should...
728
00:33:44,912 --> 00:33:46,779
Wow.
729
00:33:50,749 --> 00:33:53,584
You two, get a room.
Invite me over.
730
00:33:53,586 --> 00:33:56,720
[car approaching]
731
00:33:56,722 --> 00:33:58,822
[tires screech]
732
00:33:59,824 --> 00:34:02,425
Kyle?
Mom?
733
00:34:02,427 --> 00:34:04,360
Kyle!
734
00:34:04,362 --> 00:34:07,396
What are you doing here?
I was just running errands.
735
00:34:07,398 --> 00:34:11,232
Oh, baby, this is more
than I could ever
have hoped for!
736
00:34:11,234 --> 00:34:14,301
This is wonderful!
[chuckling]
737
00:34:14,303 --> 00:34:15,969
You are a girl, right?
738
00:34:15,971 --> 00:34:18,571
Mom, of course she's a girl.
Would you please
stop hugging me?
739
00:34:18,573 --> 00:34:21,607
We hadn't told her yet.
You don't understand.
740
00:34:21,609 --> 00:34:25,110
I used to catch this boy
masturbating with every
vegetable in the fridge.
741
00:34:25,112 --> 00:34:27,145
And now this! Oh!
742
00:34:27,147 --> 00:34:30,148
Have you told that awful
ex-boyfriend of yours yet?
743
00:34:30,150 --> 00:34:32,116
Mom, I have a feeling
that he already knows.
744
00:34:32,118 --> 00:34:34,318
I have a feeling
this is the funniest thing
he's ever seen.
745
00:34:34,320 --> 00:34:37,621
Well, I have a feeling that
the childish things that he's
doing are acts of jealousy.
746
00:34:37,623 --> 00:34:40,423
In some small way,
it's nice to know
that he cares for a change.
747
00:34:40,425 --> 00:34:44,627
Who gives a shit about him?
I'm gonna be a grandma!
748
00:34:44,629 --> 00:34:47,730
This is war!
Marc is gonna rue the day
he ever messed with me!
749
00:34:47,732 --> 00:34:50,132
Wow, you almost seem
like a top.
Marc thinks he can get
750
00:34:50,134 --> 00:34:52,634
whatever he wants
just by taking his shirt off.
751
00:34:52,636 --> 00:34:56,571
Maybe some guys don't want
a hot, muscular stud who's
confident with their sexuality.
752
00:34:56,573 --> 00:35:00,607
Maybe some people think
it's charming enough to pretend
that you're sexually conflicted.
753
00:35:00,609 --> 00:35:03,843
Some people like...
Octavio.
754
00:35:03,845 --> 00:35:05,611
Octo-what?
755
00:35:06,613 --> 00:35:08,847
Oh, hi, honey.
I'm Tiffani.
756
00:35:08,849 --> 00:35:11,683
The rhinoceros?
Excuse me?
757
00:35:11,685 --> 00:35:14,986
Tiffani, this is Octavio
from that group that I
was telling you about.
758
00:35:14,988 --> 00:35:17,054
Mmm. Rhinoceros?
759
00:35:17,056 --> 00:35:19,089
I'll call you tonight.
760
00:35:19,091 --> 00:35:21,324
Good luck
not fucking each other.
761
00:35:23,226 --> 00:35:25,160
So, Octavio.
762
00:35:25,162 --> 00:35:27,228
[corrects pronunciation]
Octavio.
Octavio.
763
00:35:27,230 --> 00:35:30,231
It's like you're saying
a V and V at the same time.
764
00:35:30,233 --> 00:35:32,366
Octavio.
"B and B"?
765
00:35:32,368 --> 00:35:34,034
V and V.
766
00:35:34,036 --> 00:35:36,369
So, what are you
doing here?
767
00:35:37,371 --> 00:35:40,072
Your girlfriend's sexy.
Thanks.
768
00:35:40,074 --> 00:35:43,308
Nothing like I expected.
So what are you saying?
I'm not good enough for her?
769
00:35:43,310 --> 00:35:46,644
No, I just...
I didn't believe you.
770
00:35:46,646 --> 00:35:49,880
Something about you
screamed single...and lonely.
771
00:35:49,882 --> 00:35:51,882
Well, as you can see,
I'm clearly not.
772
00:35:51,884 --> 00:35:53,617
And horny.
773
00:35:53,619 --> 00:35:55,285
Horny.
774
00:35:55,287 --> 00:35:57,854
You're-- You're
hitting on me.
Yes, I am.
775
00:35:57,856 --> 00:35:58,921
[mouths words]
776
00:35:58,923 --> 00:36:00,656
What about Homo No More?
777
00:36:00,658 --> 00:36:02,324
I thought they
straightened you out.
778
00:36:02,326 --> 00:36:04,259
Yeah, but when I
saw you at the meeting,
779
00:36:04,261 --> 00:36:06,361
I sort of fell off my wagon.
780
00:36:06,363 --> 00:36:09,731
Well, you didn't really
have that far to fall.
Shut up.
781
00:36:09,733 --> 00:36:11,899
I must have you.
782
00:36:11,901 --> 00:36:14,668
I have a feeling that this
is against the rules.
783
00:36:14,670 --> 00:36:18,405
It's okay. That bossy guy,
Jacob, he breaks the rules
all the time.
784
00:36:18,407 --> 00:36:20,940
Wait. Jacob's gay?
Of course.
785
00:36:20,942 --> 00:36:22,942
One time he followed me
into the bathroom at school
786
00:36:22,944 --> 00:36:25,678
and started tapping his toes
underneath the stall.
787
00:36:25,680 --> 00:36:29,281
Anyways,
enough about him.
788
00:36:31,917 --> 00:36:33,918
Your lips taste
like cherry.
789
00:36:33,920 --> 00:36:35,986
It's my girlfriend's
lip gloss.
790
00:36:39,290 --> 00:36:41,791
Oh, Octavio.
[corrects pronunciation]
Octavio.
791
00:36:45,629 --> 00:36:48,631
Well, I'm this way.
Thanks for the jog.
792
00:36:48,633 --> 00:36:51,400
Cool. Hey, you wanna
come over tonight?
793
00:36:51,402 --> 00:36:54,302
Uh, no, I can't.
I'm gonna watch the game
with Kyle and Tiffani.
794
00:36:54,304 --> 00:36:57,538
Oh. Well, you guys have fun.
795
00:36:57,540 --> 00:36:59,473
Hey, you wanna
jog again tomorrow?
796
00:36:59,475 --> 00:37:02,776
Maybe late afternoon?
We can hang out afterwards.
797
00:37:02,778 --> 00:37:05,044
That'd be great.
Cool.
798
00:37:13,219 --> 00:37:15,219
That's how we gays do it.
799
00:37:17,155 --> 00:37:19,723
Hey, w-wasn't
that awesome?
800
00:37:19,725 --> 00:37:21,391
Yeah.
801
00:37:22,393 --> 00:37:24,560
Kyle made his mom so happy.
802
00:37:33,569 --> 00:37:34,902
What could they
possibly have in common
803
00:37:34,904 --> 00:37:36,737
besides wanting
to be straight?
804
00:37:36,739 --> 00:37:39,439
Well, they both have dicks
that haven't been sucked today.
805
00:37:39,441 --> 00:37:40,573
Thanks, Gwen.
806
00:37:40,575 --> 00:37:42,675
You have nothing
to worry about.
807
00:37:42,677 --> 00:37:46,045
Kyle's nonthreatening.
He's like...soy milk
808
00:37:46,047 --> 00:37:49,281
or something you use
when you run out of normal milk.
809
00:37:49,283 --> 00:37:52,250
And you're cream--
gay cream.
810
00:37:52,252 --> 00:37:54,452
Ew.
Hold still!
811
00:37:54,454 --> 00:37:56,654
What's up with
all the drawing?
812
00:37:56,656 --> 00:37:58,822
I don't know.
813
00:37:58,824 --> 00:38:01,357
I like it.
I'm kind of good at it.
814
00:38:01,359 --> 00:38:02,858
Since when?
815
00:38:02,860 --> 00:38:05,093
Since now.
816
00:38:05,095 --> 00:38:07,562
I think I found my calling.
817
00:38:07,564 --> 00:38:10,031
I barely think
about sex anymore.
818
00:38:10,033 --> 00:38:12,333
I just wanna draw it.
819
00:38:12,335 --> 00:38:14,835
That's so not like you.
820
00:38:14,837 --> 00:38:17,504
And you being all jealous
isn't like you, either.
821
00:38:17,506 --> 00:38:21,574
Look, it's simple.
Troy is a blank canvas.
822
00:38:21,576 --> 00:38:23,609
No, he's a sketch.
823
00:38:23,611 --> 00:38:26,678
He's got all these lame ideas
about what being gay is like,
824
00:38:26,680 --> 00:38:30,148
but he needs you to come in
and provide the horny details.
825
00:38:30,150 --> 00:38:33,884
Ha-ha.
And before you know it...
826
00:38:35,620 --> 00:38:37,621
fine art.
827
00:38:38,623 --> 00:38:41,391
[grunting]
828
00:38:41,393 --> 00:38:44,127
[crowd cheering on TV] Fucking shit!Fucking shit!
829
00:38:44,129 --> 00:38:46,329
Come on, motherfuckers!
We can win this!
830
00:38:46,331 --> 00:38:50,466
Kyle, 48 points behind
with less than a minute to go.
831
00:38:50,468 --> 00:38:52,468
Oh.
[TV off]
832
00:38:52,470 --> 00:38:54,303
That was
actually fun, though.
833
00:38:54,305 --> 00:38:56,004
I mean, it sucks
that we lost.
834
00:38:56,006 --> 00:38:58,773
Aw, you'll get over it.
835
00:38:58,775 --> 00:39:01,542
Um, so how was your day?
836
00:39:01,544 --> 00:39:03,443
Strange.
837
00:39:03,445 --> 00:39:06,212
But, you know, there was
something that I wanted
to talk to you about.
838
00:39:06,214 --> 00:39:10,049
Something I didn't share
with the group yesterday.
839
00:39:10,051 --> 00:39:14,820
I didn't exactly
go cold salami when I
decided to turn straight.
840
00:39:14,822 --> 00:39:17,989
There were a few slip-ups.
While you were with Tiffani.
841
00:39:17,991 --> 00:39:20,324
Well, yeah.
And she's great,
842
00:39:20,326 --> 00:39:23,894
because she understands
how pent-up feelings
843
00:39:23,896 --> 00:39:27,931
can just explode if you don't
do anything about 'em.
844
00:39:27,933 --> 00:39:32,502
So, it's-- it's okay
if one of us makes a mistake
every once in a while.
845
00:39:32,504 --> 00:39:35,705
You know, we've even talked
about the possibility of...
846
00:39:35,707 --> 00:39:38,841
playing...together.
847
00:39:38,843 --> 00:39:41,376
What, like a three-way?
Yeah.
848
00:39:41,378 --> 00:39:44,011
Yeah. I had a three-way once.
849
00:39:44,013 --> 00:39:46,380
What?
Yeah, with two girls.
850
00:39:46,382 --> 00:39:48,515
Oh. I guess that counts.
851
00:39:48,517 --> 00:39:50,850
Barely.
852
00:39:50,852 --> 00:39:53,786
We were in this empty farmhouse
outside of town.
853
00:39:53,788 --> 00:39:56,188
It was going great,
you know.
854
00:39:56,190 --> 00:39:58,123
They had me in the middle.
We were kissing.
855
00:39:58,125 --> 00:40:01,626
And then they
pulled their panties down
and pushed me downtown,
856
00:40:01,628 --> 00:40:03,394
and that's when things
started to fall apart.
857
00:40:03,396 --> 00:40:05,028
So you didn't like it?
858
00:40:05,030 --> 00:40:10,132
Well, it wasn't
doing much for me.
Does that make me gay?
859
00:40:10,134 --> 00:40:12,701
Well, lots of straight guys
don't like eating pussy.
860
00:40:12,703 --> 00:40:16,371
I mean, they complain
about it all the time.
So what happened next?
861
00:40:16,373 --> 00:40:19,407
Well, the situation
got worse.
862
00:40:19,409 --> 00:40:22,143
I couldn't, you know.
863
00:40:23,612 --> 00:40:25,913
I couldn't find their clits.
You couldn't?
864
00:40:25,915 --> 00:40:28,515
Or G-spots or whatever.
865
00:40:28,517 --> 00:40:31,084
I was down there forever.
It was embarrassing.
866
00:40:31,086 --> 00:40:33,152
They laughed at me.
867
00:40:33,154 --> 00:40:36,588
And one of them even called me
the Susan Lucci
of tongue fucking.
868
00:40:36,590 --> 00:40:39,057
Seventeen attempts
and no clit.
869
00:40:39,059 --> 00:40:41,726
I know where it's at.
You do?
870
00:40:41,728 --> 00:40:44,061
Yeah.
Well, could you show me?
871
00:40:44,063 --> 00:40:47,297
Show you?
How do you find it
on Tiffani?
872
00:40:47,299 --> 00:40:51,066
How am I supposed
to show you that?
I don't know. Use your fingers.
873
00:40:52,935 --> 00:40:55,369
How about I use yours?
874
00:40:55,371 --> 00:40:57,571
You know, so you can feel
what I'm doing.
875
00:41:06,113 --> 00:41:08,547
This is stupid.
No, come on.
It'll be fun.
876
00:41:08,549 --> 00:41:10,782
I'll show you
my whole routine.
877
00:41:12,818 --> 00:41:15,052
All right.
[clears throat]
878
00:41:18,423 --> 00:41:20,991
All right. First,
879
00:41:20,993 --> 00:41:24,461
you gotta start
with some little teases.
880
00:41:28,131 --> 00:41:30,132
Breathe on it.
881
00:41:31,134 --> 00:41:34,169
[exhales]
Make her squirm.
882
00:41:36,172 --> 00:41:39,440
And then, you just...
883
00:41:39,442 --> 00:41:43,143
[laughing]
Which is usually not
the reaction that I get.
884
00:41:43,145 --> 00:41:46,279
No, it's-- it's good.
It's-- It's good.
885
00:41:54,921 --> 00:41:56,955
In the middle
of all of this,
886
00:41:56,957 --> 00:41:58,890
of course,
887
00:41:58,892 --> 00:42:01,125
is the love button.
888
00:42:02,227 --> 00:42:06,463
But most girls go nuts
if you just...
889
00:42:06,465 --> 00:42:08,465
dive on in.
890
00:42:44,868 --> 00:42:46,368
That's good.
891
00:42:46,370 --> 00:42:48,903
That's really good.
892
00:42:51,539 --> 00:42:54,274
Sorry I missed the game, guys.
What the hell?
893
00:42:54,276 --> 00:42:57,543
I was just showing Troy
some tips on the art
of cunnilingus.
894
00:42:57,545 --> 00:42:59,011
Not that I need 'em.
895
00:42:59,013 --> 00:43:01,380
Even Melissa Etheridge could
learn a thing or two from Kyle.
896
00:43:01,382 --> 00:43:03,115
I gotta get going.
897
00:43:03,117 --> 00:43:05,717
Oh, stay.
There's plenty to eat.
Yeah, you don't have to go.
898
00:43:05,719 --> 00:43:07,919
Uh, I gotta
call it a night.
899
00:43:07,921 --> 00:43:11,455
Thanks for, um,
time, Kyle.
900
00:43:15,960 --> 00:43:18,695
Did you see that?
One more session like that,
and he's gonna explode.
901
00:43:18,697 --> 00:43:21,263
Yeah, if he doesn't explode
with Marc first.
902
00:43:23,600 --> 00:43:25,434
[yells]
I win!
903
00:43:25,436 --> 00:43:27,735
[chuckling]
Oh.
904
00:43:29,070 --> 00:43:31,071
What?
905
00:43:32,440 --> 00:43:35,608
So, uh, when did you first
know for sure you were gay?
906
00:43:35,610 --> 00:43:37,242
Mmm. Just now.
907
00:43:39,111 --> 00:43:42,646
No, I had my suspicions
when I was, like, 12 or 13.
908
00:43:42,648 --> 00:43:45,415
But I didn't know for sure
until a couple years later
909
00:43:45,417 --> 00:43:47,917
when I went down
on my first guy.
910
00:43:47,919 --> 00:43:50,085
It's the best thing
that's ever happened to me.
911
00:43:50,087 --> 00:43:51,453
What? Being gay?
912
00:43:51,455 --> 00:43:53,154
Yeah.
913
00:43:53,156 --> 00:43:56,123
Imagine that you think you're
gonna live your life one way--
914
00:43:56,125 --> 00:44:00,593
you get a job, you get married,
get a three-bedroom house--
915
00:44:00,595 --> 00:44:04,930
and then you discover
this...thing about yourself.
916
00:44:04,932 --> 00:44:09,200
It opens up a million
new options as to how
you can live your life.
917
00:44:09,202 --> 00:44:11,202
Suddenly, you don't have
those milestones
918
00:44:11,204 --> 00:44:14,138
that straight people have
to compare each other against.
919
00:44:14,140 --> 00:44:16,340
You can...choose
your own adventure.
920
00:44:18,042 --> 00:44:19,709
I love those books.
921
00:44:19,711 --> 00:44:22,478
Me, too.
But aren't you worried
922
00:44:22,480 --> 00:44:25,013
you'll end up all alone
and not have
any of those things?
923
00:44:25,015 --> 00:44:28,116
Doesn't everyone?
Gay or straight?
924
00:44:30,085 --> 00:44:32,386
Sprint you home.
925
00:44:34,689 --> 00:44:37,389
[panting]
926
00:44:40,226 --> 00:44:42,961
And just so you know,
Kyle's mom's reaction
927
00:44:42,963 --> 00:44:44,996
to him being straight
wasn't awesome.
928
00:44:44,998 --> 00:44:46,998
Huh?
Well,
929
00:44:47,000 --> 00:44:48,933
you said it like
you were happy for them.
930
00:44:48,935 --> 00:44:51,035
Like that's the way
it should be.
931
00:44:51,037 --> 00:44:53,203
My parents are totally cool
with me being gay.
932
00:44:53,205 --> 00:44:55,338
Yeah, but are your parents
really okay with it?
933
00:44:55,340 --> 00:44:58,040
I bet Kyle's mom
grew to be okay with it.
934
00:44:58,042 --> 00:45:00,409
But you saw
how happy she was.
935
00:45:00,411 --> 00:45:02,978
And that's what parents
really want for their kids.
936
00:45:02,980 --> 00:45:05,480
If you ask,
most parents will say
937
00:45:05,482 --> 00:45:08,182
they just want their kids
to be happy.
938
00:45:08,184 --> 00:45:11,084
And maybe my mom
would be happier if I put
my dick somewhere else.
939
00:45:11,086 --> 00:45:15,054
But you've seen those ex-gays.
Is that happy?
940
00:45:16,222 --> 00:45:18,456
[sighs]
If your parents love you
941
00:45:18,458 --> 00:45:20,858
and they think you're happy,
they'll adjust.
942
00:45:22,293 --> 00:45:25,194
I don't think my parents
would adjust to me being gay.
943
00:45:25,196 --> 00:45:28,230
They shouldn't have
anything to do with it.
944
00:45:28,232 --> 00:45:31,933
You have to be who you are.
It's the only way
you can live with yourself.
945
00:45:33,835 --> 00:45:35,869
And it's the only way
I can live at all.
946
00:45:37,371 --> 00:45:39,405
Did you wanna take a shower?
947
00:45:39,407 --> 00:45:42,141
Talk about getting my creative juices flowing.
948
00:45:42,143 --> 00:45:45,711
I didn't know
you were here.
Wait. Keep 'em down.
949
00:45:45,713 --> 00:45:47,646
Would you boys
let me draw you?
950
00:45:47,648 --> 00:45:49,214
What, together?
951
00:45:49,216 --> 00:45:52,784
No, right where you are.
Right now.
952
00:45:52,786 --> 00:45:55,920
I'll call it Proposition.
953
00:45:55,922 --> 00:45:58,289
What do you think?
I don't know. It...
954
00:45:58,291 --> 00:46:02,259
It's this or renting a movie.
Choose your own adventure.
955
00:46:06,363 --> 00:46:08,530
When I walked in on the two
of you, I was, like,
956
00:46:08,532 --> 00:46:10,999
"Fuck this
drawing-one-person-at-a-time
shit.
957
00:46:11,001 --> 00:46:13,468
If I can capture the tension
between these two"...
958
00:46:13,470 --> 00:46:18,172
There was tension?
Honey, it was more tense than
Star Jones in a training bra.
959
00:46:18,174 --> 00:46:21,074
Now, make that look
you had--
960
00:46:21,076 --> 00:46:24,109
surprised, a little turned-on,
kind of scared.
961
00:46:25,544 --> 00:46:27,878
No. I don't know.
962
00:46:27,880 --> 00:46:30,981
Stare at Marc's crotch
and imagine what he could
do to you with that.
963
00:46:30,983 --> 00:46:33,282
Trust me,
he could do a lot.
964
00:46:36,119 --> 00:46:37,853
Perfect.
965
00:46:37,855 --> 00:46:41,623
So, uh, you two dated?
966
00:46:41,625 --> 00:46:45,326
Gwen was my last girlfriend.
And Marc was my first.
967
00:46:45,328 --> 00:46:49,696
After him,
all I ever wanted
to date were fags.
968
00:46:49,698 --> 00:46:52,298
I've got an idea.
This could take forever,
969
00:46:52,300 --> 00:46:56,301
and I see the potential for
something more interesting.
970
00:46:56,303 --> 00:46:59,137
Could I do a series
with you guys?
971
00:46:59,139 --> 00:47:03,107
Almost like a story
that starts with this scene
and goes from there.
972
00:47:03,109 --> 00:47:04,875
What do you think?
I don't know.
973
00:47:04,877 --> 00:47:07,844
If I said,
"Pose with a woman,"
you'd totally do it.
974
00:47:07,846 --> 00:47:10,847
It's not like we'd even
have time to pose for a series.
975
00:47:10,849 --> 00:47:13,749
I'll take photos
and use them to draw from.
976
00:47:13,751 --> 00:47:15,684
Come on.
We can be done in minutes,
977
00:47:15,686 --> 00:47:18,186
depending how well
you two...connect.
978
00:47:18,188 --> 00:47:22,123
Yeah, but Troy
feels uncomfortable.
979
00:47:22,125 --> 00:47:25,659
No. I'll do it.
980
00:47:25,661 --> 00:47:29,061
Perfect.
I'll get my camera.
981
00:47:29,063 --> 00:47:30,562
You sure?
982
00:47:31,997 --> 00:47:34,298
Yeah.
983
00:47:34,300 --> 00:47:37,000
Choose your own adventure.
984
00:47:37,002 --> 00:47:40,536
Okay, Troy, sit back down.
Marc, off with the pants.
985
00:47:44,740 --> 00:47:46,741
[beeps]
Perfect.
986
00:47:46,743 --> 00:47:50,211
Okay, Troy,
stand back up with Marc.
987
00:47:50,213 --> 00:47:53,414
I want you to do
that same character
you were doing.
988
00:47:53,416 --> 00:47:57,850
Like he's a virgin
and he wants it,
but he's confused.
989
00:47:57,852 --> 00:48:01,253
Can you do that?
Yeah.
990
00:48:01,255 --> 00:48:04,589
So, Marc, honey,
why don't you
get down on one knee
991
00:48:04,591 --> 00:48:07,358
and put your hands
underneath...
992
00:48:07,360 --> 00:48:10,094
Yeah, that.
[camera beeps]
993
00:48:10,096 --> 00:48:13,864
Actually,
raise the shirt a little
and lift your head
994
00:48:13,866 --> 00:48:15,999
so you're looking
into his eyes.
995
00:48:16,001 --> 00:48:17,900
[camera beeps]
996
00:48:17,902 --> 00:48:20,869
Look like you're in the moment
and you want it.
997
00:48:20,871 --> 00:48:22,904
[beeps]
998
00:48:22,906 --> 00:48:25,539
Marc, I want you to stand
and take Troy's...
999
00:48:25,541 --> 00:48:28,608
Yeah, that.
[camera beeps]
1000
00:48:28,610 --> 00:48:30,776
Now, Troy,
the removal of the shirt
1001
00:48:30,778 --> 00:48:33,111
is one of
the hottest moments.
1002
00:48:33,113 --> 00:48:36,880
When you know soon
you'll be skin on skin,
1003
00:48:36,882 --> 00:48:39,082
chest on chest,
1004
00:48:39,084 --> 00:48:41,617
lips on lips.
1005
00:48:41,619 --> 00:48:44,686
[camera beeps]
Marc, toss the shirt aside.
1006
00:48:44,688 --> 00:48:47,255
Marc, lick one of
Troy's nipples.
1007
00:48:47,257 --> 00:48:50,624
Don't worry.
It'll feel good.
1008
00:48:53,127 --> 00:48:56,963
Yeah. I-- I know.
1009
00:49:01,868 --> 00:49:04,703
[camera beeping]
1010
00:49:05,871 --> 00:49:10,574
Troy, run your left hand
through Marc's hair.
1011
00:49:11,676 --> 00:49:13,677
[camera beeps]
1012
00:49:14,912 --> 00:49:17,146
Marc, hold it right there.
1013
00:49:17,148 --> 00:49:21,182
Troy, pull Marc in.
1014
00:49:21,184 --> 00:49:23,517
[camera beeps]
1015
00:49:23,519 --> 00:49:25,285
Yeah.
1016
00:49:25,287 --> 00:49:27,520
[camera beeps]
1017
00:49:27,522 --> 00:49:32,724
Marc, lick his chest
up to his neck.
1018
00:49:32,726 --> 00:49:34,358
[camera beeps]
1019
00:49:35,727 --> 00:49:38,127
[Gwen]
How you feeling, Troy?
1020
00:49:39,462 --> 00:49:42,697
Really, really good.
1021
00:49:42,699 --> 00:49:44,698
Then throw your head back.
1022
00:49:46,534 --> 00:49:48,201
[grunts]
Sorry.
1023
00:49:48,203 --> 00:49:50,102
It's perfect.
Stay right there.
1024
00:49:50,104 --> 00:49:53,671
Marc, make like you're
kissing your way down.
1025
00:49:53,673 --> 00:49:57,074
[camera beeping]
1026
00:50:00,111 --> 00:50:02,045
How 'bout I do this?
1027
00:50:02,047 --> 00:50:04,547
This is hot, right?
God, yeah.
1028
00:50:04,549 --> 00:50:06,315
You're a natural, Troy.
1029
00:50:06,317 --> 00:50:08,550
[camera beeps]
Close your eyes.
1030
00:50:08,552 --> 00:50:13,420
Marc, move down between his legs
and kiss his stomach.
1031
00:50:13,422 --> 00:50:15,822
[camera beeping]
1032
00:50:17,291 --> 00:50:19,925
Now, Marc, get up
so that you're on top of him,
1033
00:50:19,927 --> 00:50:22,060
face-to-face.
1034
00:50:24,430 --> 00:50:27,732
You can open your eyes
if you want.
1035
00:50:27,734 --> 00:50:31,568
Hold that pose.
Like you're about to kiss.
1036
00:50:31,570 --> 00:50:34,571
One of those first kisses
1037
00:50:34,573 --> 00:50:37,540
that takes forever
before you meet.
1038
00:50:37,542 --> 00:50:39,675
Moving closer...
1039
00:50:40,977 --> 00:50:43,177
and closer.
1040
00:50:45,013 --> 00:50:46,513
[camera beeping]
1041
00:50:46,515 --> 00:50:48,581
Shit!
What?
1042
00:50:48,583 --> 00:50:51,684
My card's full.
Hey, look, I wanna
keep this going.
1043
00:50:51,686 --> 00:50:53,419
You're fine with that, right?
Uh-huh.
1044
00:50:53,421 --> 00:50:55,087
I'll just go upload 'em
in my room.
1045
00:50:55,089 --> 00:50:58,090
It'll take 15 minutes.
Hold that pose.
1046
00:51:01,694 --> 00:51:06,030
I'll be in my room.
With the door closed.
1047
00:51:09,000 --> 00:51:10,500
[door closes]
1048
00:51:10,502 --> 00:51:14,536
I...don't think I can stay
like this for 15 minutes.
1049
00:51:14,538 --> 00:51:16,305
Me, either.
1050
00:51:22,644 --> 00:51:24,711
I-- I know
I'm not your type, but...
1051
00:51:24,713 --> 00:51:27,714
And I'm not a girl,
but we'll improvise.
1052
00:51:43,096 --> 00:51:46,798
[moaning]
1053
00:51:46,800 --> 00:51:48,766
Oh, that feels so good.
[moans]
1054
00:51:48,768 --> 00:51:51,968
I'm gonna...
I'm gonna...
1055
00:51:53,070 --> 00:51:56,739
[grunting]
1056
00:52:05,848 --> 00:52:07,181
Wow.
1057
00:52:07,183 --> 00:52:10,884
That was...fast.
1058
00:52:10,886 --> 00:52:14,220
I'm sorry. It's--
It's been a while.
1059
00:52:14,222 --> 00:52:17,423
Plus, I--
I haven't gotten it
like that before.
1060
00:52:17,425 --> 00:52:21,793
Like that--
meaning with a guy
or meaning it was that good?
1061
00:52:21,795 --> 00:52:25,096
Here, let me
get you a towel.
No, wait.
1062
00:52:25,098 --> 00:52:26,764
My turn.
1063
00:52:30,434 --> 00:52:34,270
[moaning, grunting]
1064
00:52:34,272 --> 00:52:36,305
Troy...
[groans]
1065
00:52:36,307 --> 00:52:38,540
Teeth! Teeth!
Sorry. Sorry.
1066
00:52:38,542 --> 00:52:40,308
[moans]
It's okay.
1067
00:52:40,310 --> 00:52:43,611
Oh, yeah! Oh!
1068
00:52:43,613 --> 00:52:47,014
[straining]
Oh, yeah!
1069
00:52:47,016 --> 00:52:49,383
[grunts]
All right.
1070
00:52:49,385 --> 00:52:51,985
[sighing]
1071
00:52:51,987 --> 00:52:53,987
Am I not
doing it right?
1072
00:52:53,989 --> 00:52:56,923
No, you were fine.
I just...
1073
00:52:58,759 --> 00:53:00,593
No, I just can't.
1074
00:53:00,595 --> 00:53:03,629
Fuck! Why am I so bad
at giving oral sex?
1075
00:53:03,631 --> 00:53:07,298
No, you were doing great.
I just...
1076
00:53:07,300 --> 00:53:09,300
I'm sorry.
1077
00:53:10,735 --> 00:53:13,136
Is it because
I'm not your type?
1078
00:53:13,138 --> 00:53:17,373
Troy, you're hot,
trust me.
1079
00:53:20,076 --> 00:53:24,479
Or, no, don't trust me.
1080
00:53:28,083 --> 00:53:30,751
Can you wait one minute?
1081
00:53:36,090 --> 00:53:38,157
These are hot.
1082
00:53:38,159 --> 00:53:40,425
I can't do it.
1083
00:53:52,905 --> 00:53:55,506
But it's going
exactly how you wanted.
1084
00:53:55,508 --> 00:53:58,642
I just can't do it.
1085
00:53:58,644 --> 00:54:01,878
If Kyle wants
to pretend to be straight
just to have sex with Troy,
1086
00:54:01,880 --> 00:54:04,614
that's his prerogative.
1087
00:54:04,616 --> 00:54:07,583
I just can't
do this anymore.
1088
00:54:26,769 --> 00:54:28,770
Well, can we at least
finish the photo shoot?
1089
00:54:28,772 --> 00:54:31,038
[door closes]
1090
00:54:31,040 --> 00:54:34,374
[car departs]
Oh, great.
1091
00:54:34,376 --> 00:54:37,043
He's probably
freaking out about
making it with a guy.
1092
00:54:37,045 --> 00:54:40,780
He's probably
looking for someone
who won't cock-tease him.
1093
00:54:42,282 --> 00:54:44,816
I know where
he's going.
1094
00:54:44,818 --> 00:54:47,885
[sighs]
I fucked up.
What is it?
1095
00:54:47,887 --> 00:54:50,487
I had sex with a guy.
1096
00:54:50,489 --> 00:54:52,188
Was it Marc?
1097
00:54:52,190 --> 00:54:54,690
Oh, my God!
That's horrible!
1098
00:54:54,692 --> 00:54:55,957
I know. It was.
1099
00:54:55,959 --> 00:54:58,092
It was?
It was?
1100
00:54:58,094 --> 00:55:00,828
I felt so guilty,
because...
1101
00:55:00,830 --> 00:55:02,830
all I could do
was think about you, Kyle.
1102
00:55:02,832 --> 00:55:05,666
Really?
Yeah. And how I let you down,
1103
00:55:05,668 --> 00:55:08,602
and how I let
the group down,
1104
00:55:08,604 --> 00:55:12,005
and how, more than anything,
I just wanted to be
with a woman.
1105
00:55:12,007 --> 00:55:13,373
Or with a man and a woman.
1106
00:55:13,375 --> 00:55:16,209
I don't know.
It's so confusing.
1107
00:55:16,211 --> 00:55:18,311
[sighs]
And then I thought
of you two,
1108
00:55:18,313 --> 00:55:21,480
and what good friends
you've been to me,
1109
00:55:21,482 --> 00:55:25,583
and how honest and open
you've been about
your struggles, Kyle,
1110
00:55:26,785 --> 00:55:31,889
and about how you two
have...an arrangement.
1111
00:56:07,792 --> 00:56:09,626
Wait, wait.
Is this too weird?
1112
00:56:09,628 --> 00:56:12,028
It's not too weird!
It's not too weird!
1113
00:56:31,447 --> 00:56:33,114
Ahhh!
1114
00:56:37,285 --> 00:56:39,252
[panting]
Show me.
1115
00:56:39,254 --> 00:56:41,854
Huh?
Show me your routine.
1116
00:56:42,922 --> 00:56:45,189
Oh. It's gonna go
that far, huh?
1117
00:56:45,191 --> 00:56:46,523
Three-ways usually do.
1118
00:56:46,525 --> 00:56:50,159
I want you to teach me.
1119
00:56:50,161 --> 00:56:51,927
Please? I need this.
1120
00:56:51,929 --> 00:56:56,064
Well, why don't I do
a little mouth magic
on you first?
1121
00:56:56,066 --> 00:56:59,567
That'll get me all nice
and rolling out
the welcome mat down there.
1122
00:56:59,569 --> 00:57:02,202
No. You two first.
1123
00:57:02,204 --> 00:57:04,637
That way, it'll get me ready
for what you're gonna do to me.
1124
00:57:04,639 --> 00:57:06,872
But you don't want
sloppy seconds.
1125
00:57:06,874 --> 00:57:09,674
I mean,
company should go first.
1126
00:57:20,718 --> 00:57:23,119
[whimpers]
1127
00:57:29,125 --> 00:57:31,893
[whimpers]
1128
00:57:31,895 --> 00:57:34,629
That is so hot.
[nervous chuckle]
1129
00:57:37,833 --> 00:57:41,735
Oh, Kyle, eat me out already.
The boy wants to see
how it's done.
1130
00:57:41,737 --> 00:57:44,871
Please don't make me!
Please don't make me!
1131
00:57:44,873 --> 00:57:46,639
[grunting]
1132
00:57:48,174 --> 00:57:52,009
[lips smacking]
1133
00:57:52,011 --> 00:57:54,378
Oh, yeah.
1134
00:57:54,380 --> 00:57:57,080
Oh, yes. That's it.
1135
00:57:57,082 --> 00:58:00,249
You can do it.
Make Mama proud.
1136
00:58:00,251 --> 00:58:03,552
My God, it's like
the little homo that could.
1137
00:58:03,554 --> 00:58:06,221
Do you wanna
try now, please?
1138
00:58:07,256 --> 00:58:09,590
Troy?
[Kyle gulps]
1139
00:58:09,592 --> 00:58:11,491
Where are you going?
[gasps]
1140
00:58:12,960 --> 00:58:15,094
Well, that certainly didn't
taste like sugar and spice.
1141
00:58:15,096 --> 00:58:18,297
Troy?
What's going on?
1142
00:58:18,299 --> 00:58:21,633
It's my pussy.
My pussy scared him away!
1143
00:58:21,635 --> 00:58:24,569
You little ex-gay sluts!
1144
00:58:24,571 --> 00:58:27,905
Oh, my God!
1145
00:58:27,907 --> 00:58:30,173
Can we come in,
or were you in
the middle of dinner?
1146
00:58:30,175 --> 00:58:31,841
What are you doing here?
1147
00:58:31,843 --> 00:58:34,410
We're not eating pussy.
What are the three of you doing?
1148
00:58:34,412 --> 00:58:36,345
Well,
[gulps]
1149
00:58:36,347 --> 00:58:38,280
Kyle was showing Troy
the art of cunnilingus.
1150
00:58:38,282 --> 00:58:40,015
And he was doing
an admirable job.
1151
00:58:40,017 --> 00:58:42,751
Yeah, for a gay guy.
1152
00:58:42,753 --> 00:58:46,688
Yeah, I know. Everything.
And you guys will do
anything to get laid.
1153
00:58:46,690 --> 00:58:50,558
I ate pussy for nothing?
1154
00:58:50,560 --> 00:58:52,693
You deserved it.
Hey!
1155
00:58:52,695 --> 00:58:54,494
It wasn't that bad.
1156
00:58:54,496 --> 00:58:56,696
I'm sorry.
I'm horrible.
1157
00:58:56,698 --> 00:58:59,264
We're all horrible.
1158
00:59:00,866 --> 00:59:04,602
If it's any consolation,
it wasn't just about the sex.
1159
00:59:04,604 --> 00:59:07,037
We really liked you.
Working out with you.
1160
00:59:07,039 --> 00:59:09,873
Watching the game.
Drawing you.
1161
00:59:09,875 --> 00:59:13,877
Well, it doesn't matter now.
You think he's gonna wanna
have anything to do with us?
1162
00:59:13,879 --> 00:59:16,613
Now, what the fucked-up
thing is, even though
you lied to me
1163
00:59:16,615 --> 00:59:20,282
and to each other
and to people
you don't even know,
1164
00:59:21,284 --> 00:59:24,519
I like you...liars.
1165
00:59:24,521 --> 00:59:27,054
We like you, too.
Yeah, you're so cool.
1166
00:59:27,056 --> 00:59:31,291
And I'm sorry.
I know I kind of led y'all on
with the whole confused thing.
1167
00:59:31,293 --> 00:59:34,727
Yeah, so, come on. You've
sucked dick and eaten pussy.
Which is it?
1168
00:59:34,729 --> 00:59:38,230
Well, that's what's been
tripping me up all these years.
1169
00:59:38,232 --> 00:59:40,432
I thought it had to be
one or the other.
1170
00:59:40,434 --> 00:59:42,800
After sampling both,
I've come to a conclusion.
1171
00:59:44,068 --> 00:59:46,903
I'm...bisexual.
1172
00:59:46,905 --> 00:59:48,905
[all together]
There's no such thing!
1173
00:59:48,907 --> 00:59:51,307
Says who?
Uh, the laws of nature.
1174
00:59:51,309 --> 00:59:53,342
It's like horses
fucking gerbils.
1175
00:59:53,344 --> 00:59:56,578
Well, then,
I'm a freak of nature,
and I'm proud of it.
1176
00:59:56,580 --> 00:59:59,514
Good. Be proud, bi-boy.
1177
00:59:59,516 --> 01:00:01,516
I wish you'd been proud
when we met.
1178
01:00:01,518 --> 01:00:04,352
Yeah, I guess that's hard
when people like you
1179
01:00:04,354 --> 01:00:07,021
and Jacob Buchanan tell him
how bad it is to be gay.
1180
01:00:07,023 --> 01:00:10,090
Yeah. I'm sorry.
1181
01:00:10,092 --> 01:00:12,459
I should've helped you
instead of trying
to take advantage
1182
01:00:12,461 --> 01:00:15,061
of you not knowing
what you were.
1183
01:00:15,063 --> 01:00:17,829
So, what do we do now?
1184
01:00:18,831 --> 01:00:20,865
We're gonna stop
people like me.
1185
01:00:20,867 --> 01:00:23,067
No one should take advantage
of confused queer kids.
1186
01:00:23,069 --> 01:00:26,470
And the sooner we help them
see past what it is
they don't like in themselves
1187
01:00:26,472 --> 01:00:29,372
so they can see all the great
things right in front of them,
1188
01:00:30,374 --> 01:00:32,274
the better.
1189
01:00:35,111 --> 01:00:39,013
He's a homo who fucks things up
for other homos.
I don't know if that's--
1190
01:00:39,015 --> 01:00:42,349
Octavio, if people
like him weren't around,
everyone would come out.
1191
01:00:42,351 --> 01:00:44,351
You would get laid like that.
[snaps fingers]
1192
01:00:44,353 --> 01:00:46,286
Hmm.
I take your point.
1193
01:00:46,288 --> 01:00:48,721
I'll do it.
And then we make love.
1194
01:00:54,159 --> 01:00:56,326
Stop the spread
of faggotry.
1195
01:00:56,328 --> 01:00:58,794
Wake up and smell the patchouli.
You're a dyke.
1196
01:01:00,696 --> 01:01:02,730
Help!
I'm being recruited!
1197
01:01:07,835 --> 01:01:10,802
Convince me
you didn't like that.
Do your best.
1198
01:01:11,937 --> 01:01:15,205
Look, I'm not gonna
embrace who I am
1199
01:01:15,207 --> 01:01:17,173
just because
it's obvious, okay?
1200
01:01:17,175 --> 01:01:21,210
What?
Everyone's so cool
with being gay.
1201
01:01:21,212 --> 01:01:24,079
"Will and Grace this,
Clay Aiken that."
1202
01:01:24,081 --> 01:01:26,081
Well, I'm not
gonna be labeled.
1203
01:01:26,083 --> 01:01:28,516
You're not convincing me.
1204
01:01:31,754 --> 01:01:33,888
Okay, I'm gay.
Now shut up and kiss me.
1205
01:01:33,890 --> 01:01:37,024
I'm not gay.
Then what do you want?
1206
01:01:37,026 --> 01:01:39,960
I want us to make art.
1207
01:01:43,297 --> 01:01:48,134
That is so...hot.
1208
01:01:49,136 --> 01:01:52,204
God, you are a lesbian.
1209
01:01:52,206 --> 01:01:54,372
[Kyle]
Mom?
1210
01:01:54,374 --> 01:01:56,874
What are you doing here?
1211
01:01:56,876 --> 01:01:58,909
What's wrong?
Nothing.
1212
01:01:58,911 --> 01:02:01,544
No. What? I've never
seen you this upset.
1213
01:02:03,046 --> 01:02:04,880
[sniffles]
1214
01:02:04,882 --> 01:02:07,983
I was at the beauty shop,
1215
01:02:07,985 --> 01:02:10,118
and I was looking
through a magazine,
1216
01:02:10,120 --> 01:02:13,187
and I saw that the Oscars
are coming up.
1217
01:02:13,189 --> 01:02:16,890
Well, I thought,
who am I gonna watch
the Oscars with?
1218
01:02:16,892 --> 01:02:20,526
And then that Britney Aguilera
song came on.
1219
01:02:20,528 --> 01:02:25,764
You know, that one about
you're beautiful,
even if you're ugly and gay?
1220
01:02:25,766 --> 01:02:30,535
And I thought,
who is gonna play me
this shitty music?
1221
01:02:30,537 --> 01:02:35,740
And who is gonna
take me dancing
when I've had a bad date?
1222
01:02:35,742 --> 01:02:39,076
Oh, Mom, come on.
Oh, no, you stop.
1223
01:02:39,078 --> 01:02:44,313
You're gonna get married
and have kids,
for Christ's sake.
1224
01:02:44,315 --> 01:02:46,515
I'm gonna visit
with my girlfriend,
1225
01:02:46,517 --> 01:02:51,252
and all we're gonna talk about
is our grandchildren.
1226
01:02:51,254 --> 01:02:54,921
And that is so boring!
1227
01:02:54,923 --> 01:02:56,856
And, Kyle,
1228
01:02:56,858 --> 01:02:59,358
you have never
been boring,
1229
01:02:59,360 --> 01:03:01,693
and that is
because you're gay.
1230
01:03:03,529 --> 01:03:05,463
You're a fag,
1231
01:03:05,465 --> 01:03:09,299
and I want
my little faggot back!
1232
01:03:10,301 --> 01:03:13,936
Mom, he is back.
1233
01:03:13,938 --> 01:03:16,872
[sobbing]
Honey.
1234
01:03:33,155 --> 01:03:36,023
[tape ripping]
1235
01:03:36,025 --> 01:03:39,126
Did my vagina
scare you away?
What?
1236
01:03:39,128 --> 01:03:42,662
The other night.
You ran away the second
you saw my vagina.
1237
01:03:44,364 --> 01:03:48,500
Don't be crazy.
I think you have
a very sexy vagina.
1238
01:03:50,202 --> 01:03:52,803
Well, you sure know how
to charm a girl.
1239
01:03:54,238 --> 01:03:56,239
[tape ripping]
There.
1240
01:03:56,241 --> 01:03:58,307
This port-a-potty's
ready to roll.
1241
01:03:58,309 --> 01:04:00,976
Stop the spread of faggotry.
I got his precious BlackBerry.
We have five minutes.
1242
01:04:00,978 --> 01:04:03,745
All right.
Now, do what you gotta do,
but be quick about it.
1243
01:04:03,747 --> 01:04:07,414
[Octavio on phone]Cool. It shouldn't take morethan a couple of minutes.
1244
01:04:07,416 --> 01:04:09,549
Hi.
Hey.
1245
01:04:09,551 --> 01:04:11,550
So, you wanna--
1246
01:04:13,819 --> 01:04:15,319
Got it.
1247
01:04:15,321 --> 01:04:18,088
Perfect. Now get your ass
at the parking lot, pronto.
1248
01:04:18,090 --> 01:04:20,824
This is turning me on.
Stop the spread
of faggotry.
1249
01:04:31,168 --> 01:04:34,270
Octavio, aren't you going
to the big presentation?
1250
01:04:34,272 --> 01:04:37,072
Oh, yeah.
But it's not till 1:00.
1251
01:04:37,074 --> 01:04:39,307
It's in five minutes.
1252
01:04:40,309 --> 01:04:43,344
It's at 1:00.
Check your schedule.
1253
01:04:47,014 --> 01:04:49,982
Oh. I could've sworn
it was...
1254
01:04:49,984 --> 01:04:53,552
So, it looks like you
have some time to kill, huh?
1255
01:04:57,390 --> 01:05:00,225
Well, you know,
there's plenty of work
to be done.
1256
01:05:00,227 --> 01:05:03,962
Oh, that's...too bad.
1257
01:05:25,750 --> 01:05:28,384
Hi. Are you here
for Coming In?
1258
01:05:28,386 --> 01:05:30,552
Yes, we are.
Where's Jacob?
1259
01:05:30,554 --> 01:05:34,655
I'm Linda, his mother.
Oh, Mrs. Buchanan,
so nice to meet you.
1260
01:05:34,657 --> 01:05:36,857
I'm Kyle, one of Jacob's
right-hand men.
1261
01:05:36,859 --> 01:05:40,227
He's running a little late,
but he did say to go ahead
and start without him.
1262
01:05:40,229 --> 01:05:42,529
Huh. Jacob's never
mentioned you.
1263
01:05:42,531 --> 01:05:45,031
Oh, well, that's probably
because he's been so busy
1264
01:05:45,033 --> 01:05:47,466
talking about all the girls
he's been dating, huh?
1265
01:05:47,468 --> 01:05:49,668
[laughs]
1266
01:05:49,670 --> 01:05:51,202
No.
1267
01:05:52,204 --> 01:05:54,171
No kissing.
1268
01:05:55,206 --> 01:05:58,608
[chuckles]
You like it nasty, huh?
1269
01:05:59,743 --> 01:06:01,076
[moans]
1270
01:06:04,180 --> 01:06:06,114
[moaning]
1271
01:06:11,185 --> 01:06:13,619
Today, I am proud to present
1272
01:06:13,621 --> 01:06:15,821
the fruits of my son's labor.
1273
01:06:15,823 --> 01:06:17,823
But more than that,
1274
01:06:17,825 --> 01:06:20,959
I am excited
to see the swelling
1275
01:06:20,961 --> 01:06:22,994
of Coming In.
1276
01:06:22,996 --> 01:06:25,763
As the homosexual threat
1277
01:06:25,765 --> 01:06:29,466
seems to be swelling
exponentially,
1278
01:06:29,468 --> 01:06:31,768
it is people
like my son Jacob
1279
01:06:31,770 --> 01:06:36,472
who continues
to thrust our crusade
into the spotlight.
1280
01:06:38,007 --> 01:06:40,675
Oh, yes.
I have wanted this
1281
01:06:40,677 --> 01:06:42,443
[unzipping]
for so long.
1282
01:06:42,445 --> 01:06:45,412
Shh. Shh.
No. I want to be loud.
1283
01:06:45,414 --> 01:06:47,247
It's dangerous.
It's hot.
1284
01:06:47,249 --> 01:06:50,283
Open this. And shut up.
1285
01:06:50,285 --> 01:06:55,254
Jacob has always been
a beacon of light.
1286
01:06:55,256 --> 01:06:59,224
When he came to me
as a teenager and told me
of his inner demons,
1287
01:06:59,226 --> 01:07:04,495
I knew we could destroy them
with loving support
1288
01:07:04,497 --> 01:07:06,563
and a strong fist.
1289
01:07:06,565 --> 01:07:09,599
Oh, you're gonna
split me in two,
aren't you?
1290
01:07:09,601 --> 01:07:12,068
[moans, grunts]
1291
01:07:12,070 --> 01:07:14,703
And we have!
1292
01:07:14,705 --> 01:07:19,674
Today, Jacob dates girls!
And he likes dating girls.
1293
01:07:19,676 --> 01:07:24,678
Jacob proves
that if you can fight it,
you can hide it.
1294
01:07:24,680 --> 01:07:29,348
And if you can hide it,
you can bury it!
1295
01:07:31,851 --> 01:07:33,518
Thank you.
1296
01:07:33,520 --> 01:07:35,519
[Jacob moans]
1297
01:07:37,955 --> 01:07:41,089
[no audible dialogue]
1298
01:07:42,458 --> 01:07:46,026
[moans]
What was that?
That was me.
1299
01:07:47,395 --> 01:07:49,763
Oh, God, it was?
1300
01:07:49,765 --> 01:07:51,765
Oh, God, it is you!
1301
01:07:51,767 --> 01:07:55,568
In keeping with the themes
that you've mentioned, Linda,
we've commissioned
1302
01:07:55,570 --> 01:08:00,605
local artist Gwen Anderson
and Coming In member
Violet Muffdaver
1303
01:08:00,607 --> 01:08:05,275
to portray the revolting
and immoral acts
of homosexuality
1304
01:08:05,277 --> 01:08:09,445
in a new and compelling
campaign, which we'd like
to present to you now.
1305
01:08:09,447 --> 01:08:10,479
Gwen.
1306
01:08:14,617 --> 01:08:16,884
[Jacob, Octavio moaning]
[squeaking]
1307
01:08:20,555 --> 01:08:23,490
[moaning continues]
[squeaking continues]
1308
01:08:28,895 --> 01:08:32,730
Members of the student press,
heterosexuals,
1309
01:08:32,732 --> 01:08:35,766
and those who want to be,
1310
01:08:35,768 --> 01:08:39,569
we present Coming In's
newest ad campaign.
1311
01:08:40,737 --> 01:08:42,137
[all gasp]
1312
01:08:42,139 --> 01:08:45,573
"Gay sex sucks."
[Guests murmuring]
1313
01:08:45,575 --> 01:08:47,942
Oh, God! Oh, baby!
1314
01:08:47,944 --> 01:08:51,145
This...is...
1315
01:08:51,147 --> 01:08:54,348
absolutely revolting!
1316
01:08:54,350 --> 01:08:55,982
Where is Jacob?
1317
01:08:55,984 --> 01:08:57,483
Oh, baby, I'm so close.
1318
01:08:57,485 --> 01:08:59,318
Where is my son?
[Jacob yelling]
1319
01:08:59,320 --> 01:09:01,186
I'm going to find Jacob,
1320
01:09:01,188 --> 01:09:04,355
and when he's through
with you...
[Jacob] Oh, God! Oh!
1321
01:09:04,357 --> 01:09:07,091
Oh, baby! So close!
So close!
1322
01:09:07,093 --> 01:09:09,693
[moaning loudly]
Oh, baby!
1323
01:09:09,695 --> 01:09:11,928
So close! So close!
[moaning continues]
1324
01:09:11,930 --> 01:09:13,763
Jacob?
1325
01:09:13,765 --> 01:09:15,264
Oh, I'm coming!
1326
01:09:15,266 --> 01:09:16,698
[all gasp]
1327
01:09:16,700 --> 01:09:18,032
[moans]
[Guests murmuring]
1328
01:09:18,034 --> 01:09:19,633
[Man whispers]
That's Jacob!
1329
01:09:19,635 --> 01:09:20,767
Oh!
1330
01:09:20,769 --> 01:09:22,668
Mommy?
1331
01:09:22,670 --> 01:09:25,837
[vomits]
[groans]
1332
01:09:25,839 --> 01:09:28,606
Get this off of me.
1333
01:09:28,608 --> 01:09:30,507
[Man]
Terrible.
1334
01:09:30,509 --> 01:09:32,642
Yep, he's gay.
1335
01:09:32,644 --> 01:09:34,644
[Linda]
And zip up, Jacob.
1336
01:09:34,646 --> 01:09:40,616
Gwen, I was wondering
if I could maybe
model for you sometime.
1337
01:09:40,618 --> 01:09:42,618
Me, too.
1338
01:09:50,659 --> 01:09:52,526
[both chuckle]
1339
01:09:52,528 --> 01:09:55,362
I didn't know outing someone
could be so much fun.
1340
01:09:55,364 --> 01:09:57,030
[Jacob]
This is who I am...
[continues, indistinct]
1341
01:09:57,032 --> 01:10:00,133
Listen, Tiffani, uh,
1342
01:10:00,135 --> 01:10:04,470
I don't know
how you feel about
the whole...bisexual thing.
1343
01:10:04,472 --> 01:10:08,006
Well, I let my ex-boyfriend's
gay roommate go down on me.
1344
01:10:08,008 --> 01:10:11,509
I'm a pretty open person.
Yeah, well,
1345
01:10:11,511 --> 01:10:15,245
you know how you and Kyle
were pretending to have
an arrangement?
1346
01:10:15,247 --> 01:10:16,646
You mean the three-ways?
1347
01:10:16,648 --> 01:10:18,314
Yeah.
1348
01:10:18,316 --> 01:10:20,983
Um, how would you feel
1349
01:10:20,985 --> 01:10:24,619
if you really had that
with me?
1350
01:10:24,621 --> 01:10:29,090
Because...I'd be honored
to be your boyfriend.
1351
01:10:31,393 --> 01:10:34,795
No one's ever said that
to me before.
[giggles]
1352
01:10:38,800 --> 01:10:41,635
You know, you went above
and beyond the call of duty.
1353
01:10:41,637 --> 01:10:45,639
[chuckles]
No. That was hot.
1354
01:10:45,641 --> 01:10:50,042
And now I think it's time
for you to repay me
for my services.
1355
01:10:50,044 --> 01:10:52,710
Oh, Octavio,
I don't think--
I won't take no for an answer.
1356
01:10:53,712 --> 01:10:55,212
No.
1357
01:11:06,023 --> 01:11:08,024
Well, that was easy.
I'm out of here.
1358
01:11:08,026 --> 01:11:10,359
You come back here,
and you talk...
No. You know what, Mom?
1359
01:11:10,361 --> 01:11:12,361
I'm glad you caught me.
1360
01:11:12,363 --> 01:11:15,430
I'm gay,
and Octavio...
1361
01:11:15,432 --> 01:11:17,732
[corrects pronunciation]
Octavio.
1362
01:11:17,734 --> 01:11:20,568
Well, he's my lover.
[scoffs]
1363
01:11:20,570 --> 01:11:23,771
[Guests gasping, murmuring]
1364
01:11:23,773 --> 01:11:26,907
Well, we're off for a fuck.
Seems like everybody is.
1365
01:11:26,909 --> 01:11:28,842
Just do me one favor.
Yeah?
1366
01:11:28,844 --> 01:11:30,810
Lead him to the clit.
Oh, honey,
1367
01:11:30,812 --> 01:11:33,512
from the waist down,
it's all clit.
[laughs]
1368
01:11:39,652 --> 01:11:42,253
That's how I do it.
1369
01:11:48,059 --> 01:11:50,226
You know what?
These lies I get us into
1370
01:11:50,228 --> 01:11:52,161
really have a way
of working out.
1371
01:11:52,163 --> 01:11:55,130
Yeah. Perfect.
1372
01:11:58,634 --> 01:12:02,536
Remember how when you and Marc
were fighting over Troy,
1373
01:12:02,538 --> 01:12:06,639
you tapped into
some unknown confidence
none of us knew you had?
1374
01:12:06,641 --> 01:12:08,474
Yeah.
1375
01:12:08,476 --> 01:12:10,275
Use it.
1376
01:12:10,277 --> 01:12:13,678
[footsteps approaching]
1377
01:12:13,680 --> 01:12:17,147
So, the plan worked.
1378
01:12:18,415 --> 01:12:20,549
Everyone seems
to be happy.
1379
01:12:21,717 --> 01:12:23,551
So, Octavio, huh?
1380
01:12:23,553 --> 01:12:26,253
Oh, please.
There's nothing there.
1381
01:12:26,255 --> 01:12:29,256
Just a friend
I had sex with once.
1382
01:12:29,258 --> 01:12:32,325
Looks like you went out
and made some hot friends.
1383
01:12:32,327 --> 01:12:35,894
Yeah. I got more social.
1384
01:12:37,329 --> 01:12:39,363
It does
make you jealous.
1385
01:12:39,365 --> 01:12:41,164
[chuckles]
What?
1386
01:12:42,499 --> 01:12:45,501
When Troy left last night,
I knew where he was going.
1387
01:12:45,503 --> 01:12:50,005
The same place I used to go
when I had a problem
I needed to talk about.
1388
01:12:50,007 --> 01:12:52,606
I got jealous.
[chuckles]
1389
01:12:54,809 --> 01:12:57,710
So,
1390
01:12:57,712 --> 01:13:01,080
do you think that
you can find it in your heart
to love somebody
1391
01:13:01,082 --> 01:13:04,249
who pretended to be straight
just to get laid?
1392
01:13:04,251 --> 01:13:05,950
I don't know.
1393
01:13:05,952 --> 01:13:08,752
Can you love someone
who flirted with
way too many guys
1394
01:13:08,754 --> 01:13:11,187
while he was
your boyfriend?
1395
01:13:11,189 --> 01:13:15,590
Can you love somebody
whose last sexual act
involved eating pussy?
1396
01:13:16,592 --> 01:13:19,226
Can you love someone who--
1397
01:13:19,228 --> 01:13:21,861
Wait. Being a flirt
was my only flaw, right?
1398
01:13:21,863 --> 01:13:24,129
I don't know.
I lost count.
1399
01:13:24,131 --> 01:13:26,431
You brushed your teeth,
right?
1400
01:13:38,744 --> 01:13:42,212
Does that turn you on
as much as I think it does?
1401
01:13:42,214 --> 01:13:43,713
Yeah.
1402
01:13:43,715 --> 01:13:46,716
But that doesn't mean
I'm not open to new experiences.
1403
01:13:46,718 --> 01:13:48,384
Come here.
1404
01:13:55,324 --> 01:13:57,525
Better than boys?
1405
01:13:57,527 --> 01:14:00,127
Different.
1406
01:14:00,129 --> 01:14:02,129
Different rocks.
1407
01:14:06,400 --> 01:14:08,567
� [pop rock]
1408
01:14:12,104 --> 01:14:14,605
[Man]� You say that you're in
1409
01:14:14,607 --> 01:14:16,506
� You say that you're out
1410
01:14:16,508 --> 01:14:19,509
� So now that it's clear
1411
01:14:19,511 --> 01:14:23,279
� Then there really isno doubt �
1412
01:14:23,281 --> 01:14:26,548
� It's only half the story
1413
01:14:28,918 --> 01:14:30,919
� You say that you'll leave
1414
01:14:30,921 --> 01:14:33,021
� You say that you'll stay
1415
01:14:33,023 --> 01:14:36,124
� And so I believe
1416
01:14:36,126 --> 01:14:39,260
� Every single word you say
1417
01:14:39,262 --> 01:14:42,462
� Is only half the story
1418
01:14:45,132 --> 01:14:49,167
� If you're only telling mehalf the story �
1419
01:14:49,169 --> 01:14:52,970
� Then I only trusthalf of you �
1420
01:14:52,972 --> 01:14:57,474
� If you're only telling mehalf the story �
1421
01:14:57,476 --> 01:14:59,876
� Just tell mewhich half is true �
1422
01:14:59,878 --> 01:15:02,011
[moaning loudly]
1423
01:15:02,013 --> 01:15:05,114
Yes! Yes! Yes!
1424
01:15:05,116 --> 01:15:07,716
[sighing]
1425
01:15:09,285 --> 01:15:12,887
Did I do good?
Yes, baby, you did good.
1426
01:15:12,889 --> 01:15:14,622
All right.
Time for thirds.
1427
01:15:14,624 --> 01:15:15,855
� [continues]
1428
01:15:18,325 --> 01:15:20,326
� I say I love you
1429
01:15:20,328 --> 01:15:22,394
� You say you love me
1430
01:15:22,396 --> 01:15:25,296
� It's our fairy tale
1431
01:15:25,298 --> 01:15:28,966
� We can make it end happily
1432
01:15:28,968 --> 01:15:32,435
� So let's rewrite the story
1433
01:15:34,438 --> 01:15:38,840
� If you're only telling mehalf the story �
1434
01:15:38,842 --> 01:15:42,610
� Which half are yougonna stick to �
1435
01:15:42,612 --> 01:15:46,847
� If you start telling meall the story �
1436
01:15:46,849 --> 01:15:50,817
� I'll start a new storywith you �
1437
01:16:05,332 --> 01:16:09,268
� If you're only telling mehalf the story �
1438
01:16:09,270 --> 01:16:13,405
� Then I only trusthalf of you �
1439
01:16:13,407 --> 01:16:17,675
� If you're only telling mehalf the story �
1440
01:16:17,677 --> 01:16:21,344
� Just tell mewhich half is true �
1441
01:16:23,814 --> 01:16:28,083
� If you're only telling mehalf the story �
1442
01:16:28,085 --> 01:16:31,886
� Which half are yougonna stick to �
1443
01:16:31,888 --> 01:16:36,156
� If you start telling meall the story �
1444
01:16:36,158 --> 01:16:40,059
� I'll start a new storywith you �
1445
01:16:42,962 --> 01:16:44,963
� [ends]
1446
01:16:44,965 --> 01:16:50,034
[Man]� You make it better
1447
01:16:50,036 --> 01:16:54,304
� When we are together
1448
01:16:54,306 --> 01:16:58,874
� Yeah, you make it better
1449
01:16:58,876 --> 01:17:03,344
� Every day
1450
01:17:03,346 --> 01:17:07,914
� You make it better
1451
01:17:07,916 --> 01:17:12,318
� When we are together
1452
01:17:12,320 --> 01:17:16,955
� Yeah, you make it better
1453
01:17:16,957 --> 01:17:21,626
� Every day
1454
01:17:21,628 --> 01:17:24,629
Closed-Captioned By
J.R. Media Services, Inc.
Burbank, CA
1455
01:18:11,376 --> 01:18:13,009
Oh, God!
1456
01:18:13,011 --> 01:18:14,844
Oh, God!
1457
01:18:14,846 --> 01:18:16,512
I am gay.
1458
01:18:16,514 --> 01:18:18,714
Oh!
147223
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.