All language subtitles for Ally McBeal - 5x11 - A Kick in the Head.en

Oh, damn it!

Damn it! Damn it! Damn it!

(KNOCKING]

Hello.

Hi.

It's a little late.

-But I'll take six boxes.
-I'm not selling cookies.

Oh.

-Are you Allyson McBeal?
-I am.

-Do you like surprises?
-I hate them.

-Am I about to get one?
-Sort of.

Want it straight up,
or would you like to sit?

Hit me.

I'm your daughter.

Did you hear me?

I'm just waiting for the little
fantasy beat to be over.

-You're still standing there.
-Because I'm still here.

And I'm still your daughter.

-Obviously, that's impossible.
-Obviously, it's not.

Ten and a half years ago,
you harvested eggs and stored them.

By a mistake at the facility,
they gave one of your eggs. . .

. . .to my father, who died six months
ago. I was placed with a wicked aunt.

I've spent two months
tracking you down.

Hi, Mom.

I've been down this road

A Kick ln the Head

Walking the line
That's painted by pride

And I have made mistakes in my life
That ljust can 't hide

Oh, I believe I am ready
For what love has to bring

I got myself together
Now I'm ready to sing

I've been searching my soul tonight
I know there's so much more to life

Now I know I can shine the light
To fiind my way back home

Baby

-Obviously, we're mortified.
-Just tell me, is it true?

-Is she my genetic daughter?
-Apparently, she is.

-We're mortified.
-How can this happen?

There is an explanation.
I'm not sure it would appease you.

What am I gonna do?

As you know,
you gave your egg anonymously--

As part of a study.

I was to be notified if it were ever
actually used. I was never notified.

Which was our mistake. We're mortified.

-Our records show you were contacted.
-I wasn't. I wasn't. I'm a mother.

There's a 1 0-year-old girl
out there with my eyes.

You're mortified? I'm a mother.

Sometimes these things
can be a blessing.

A blessing?

Did you say "a blessing"?

You plop a 1 0-year-old girl down
in somebody's lap and you--?

Hi, Maddie.

How long have you
been standing there?

Long enough.

Obviously, this is a very big day
in my life. My very first murder trial.

Are we all set, buddy?

(NOSE WHISTLES]

You look nervous. No reason for
you to be nervous. I'm first chair.

-You're doing a murder trial?
-Yes. That a problem?

NELLE: The defendant's okay with it?
-I'm ready, Nelle. Just ask John.

Are you okay, buddy?

Next up. Anybody seen Jenny and Ally?

Ally has plumbing problems.
With her house.

Jenny has plumbing problems.
Not her house.

Richard, I'm sorry.
Can I see you in private?

What's wrong?

I am trying to be supportive
of the new serious you. . .

. . .but I am very concerned
about you doing this trial.

Why?

If we lose, our client will
go to prison for the rest of his life.

-The client's thrilled with me.
-You guaranteed an acquittal.

That tends to please them.
We cannot guarantee an acquittal.

In fact, this case
is enormously difficult.

He claims he kicked his wife because
he thought her head was a ball?

The reality is, he will likely
go to prison forever.

I can do it.

John, there's an old homily--
Clich�, yes, but I believe in it:

Winning isn't everything.

People on trial for first-degree
murder tend to disfavor that homily.

I'm gonna win this, John. You watch.

Yes.

-Her daughter?
-That's what she said.

-In there?
-Yes.

-Ten years old?
-Is Billy the father?

She didn't say.

I'm an extremely emotional person.
Don't take anything I say personally.

What do I look like, a dope?
You're upset. Fine. Sorry to burden you.

-Don't try to guilt me, because--
-I'm not.

I'm just saying I understand
your feelings.

Maddie, right now, I don't even
understand my feelings.

Really nice.

I left you a note.

You run off, you don't tell me where
you're going. Really nice.

I'm Bonnie Boone. Maddie's aunt.

I am sorry about this. This is a cry
for attention. Really nice.

-Don't psychoanalyze me--
-I'm talking.

So am l.

I really apologize.

She asked me to help track you down
because she wanted to see you one day.

She never said she'd run off, leaving
me to worry myself sick with grief.

Could you be any more dramatic?

-We have a 1 :00 flight.
-1 :00?

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Whoa. Whoa. Whoa.

A 1 0-year-old genetic daughter
doesn't just show up at my door. . .

. . .and then catch a 1 :00 flight.

Well, I'll be gone.
Isn't that what you want?

Maddie, I'm. . . .

I'm sure you're a nice girl, but you
chose to insert yourself in my life. . .

. . .so, like it or not, in some capacity,
you are in it. And so are you.

And nobody is gonna be getting
on any 1 :00 flight.

I was at the beach, and I noticed
the waves were exceptionally big.

Yes.

I first saw a rather attractive
woman sunbathing. . .

. . .and my eye caught hers.

Not in a sexual way, of course.
I'm a conservative woman.

Objection, Your Honor. Dull.

Overruled.

-What about after you saw the woman?
-Well, then I saw that man.

And he was walking towards
her in an idle way.

Then I saw his eyes fix upon her.

Keenly.

All of a sudden, he started
to run straight at her.

And as he got within a yard. . .

. . .he planted his left foot
in the sand, and with his right. . .

. . .he kicked her. Right in the head.

-He just ran up and kicked her?
-Right in the head.

Almost as if her head were,
say, a soccer ball?

-Exactly.
-Thank you, Ms. Finley.

Thank you.

Ms. Finley, what happened after
Mr. Willis realized he'd hurt his wife?

-He became very upset.
-Upset. Despondent, even?

I think.

You think? You're an observant woman.
Did he become despondent or not?

He did.

Thank you.

(JOHN'S NOSE WHISTLES]

Why did you leap up
in the middle of my cross?

I didn't leap, I stood.
And your cross appeared to be over.

For us to have a chance,
the jury has to respect me.

-They have to think of me as a sage.
-That's not likely to happen.

Hello.

Oh, I'm sorry.

We have to deal with intent.

Our defense is that he didn't know
he was kicking his wife.

When he realized it was his wife,
his remorse is important.

And as long as I'm in progress
with a sentence here. . .

. . .Iet me conclude it by stressing
over again. . .

. . .Kendall, I think we should
plead this out.

Richard is sure we can win.

How could the jury
not think he was crazy?

He thought his wife
was a soccer ball.

I used to be a lawyer.

Two years, and I quit.

And now you sing?

Yeah, TV jingles.

I was a blues singer for about
six years and could not make my rent.

On New Year's Eve,
I did these jingles as a lark.

Gilligan, Beverly Hillbillies,
you name it. The crowd went nuts.

-I'm suddenly getting bookings.
-And your brother?

Dead.

Yes, I know. I just. . . .

He was a great man.

He. . . .

A great man.

So are you her only family?

Yeah. Unless we include genetics.
That would make you family.

Let me know what you wanna do.

You wanna get to know us?
You want us to go away?

You have no obligation.
Maddie understands that.

Could you just stay the night
and let me visit with her some?

Sure.

You know, she said that, well, you
know, she wanted to live with me.

-Excuse me?
-Well, that's what she said.

Well, she's just. . . .

You know, she's very manipulative.

She's just. . . .

Kids.

Yeah.

-You will so not believe it.
-What?

There's a bar downstairs.

-Stage, music. I got you booked.
-What?

-Tonight. Elaine helped.
-I'm sorry. I should've checked first.

But I thought I should nail the booking.
I can fill in if you cancel.

It seats over a hundred. They have
these lkettes who could do your backup.

-Down, girl.
-This could be great!

If you started getting bookings in
Boston, I could see Ally all the time.

Did you tell Ally you wanted
to live with her?

Um. . . .

I was testing her. To see. . . .

To see what?

I wanted to spend the night
to get to know her. . .

. . .so I kind of made my life
seem a little more desperate.

-Sorry.
-Shall I cancel the booking?

-There's no problem for me to fill in.
-No, she'll do it.

But--

Why not?

Richard, I must be candid when
I tell you, I suffer from stress.

-Maybe it's in light of world events.
-We need to focus on the case.

I am. And if you introduce
that particular exhibit. . .

. . .it will push my stress
to the breaking point.

If we argue that the shadows
or the reflection off the water--

You can't paint her face
to make her look like a soccer ball.

It's tampering.

Hi. The judge just called
us back into session.

Okay.

Sometimes when I look at her,
I still can't believe she's gone.

Hey.

I didn't see you.

-We can't introduce that, Mr. Willis.
-Why?

It's just a picture of her.

You don't notice anything particularly
different about this picture?

Janet was sunbathing.
I decided to take a walk on the beach.

As I came back, I saw what
I thought was a soccer ball.

I used to play soccer,
and, well, I just kicked it.

I think I speak for the jury. . .

. . .when I ask, why would
you kick somebody else's ball?

I guess I didn't think about that.
There was nobody around--

What were your thoughts, sir,
when you first realized. . .

. . .the soccer ball
was in fact your wife?

I was devastated.
I loved my wife deeply.

We had never been happier.

I wish I could explain what possessed
me at that moment. I can't.

-You're a college professor?
-I am.

The day before you kicked
your wife, did you teach?

-Yes.
-Any insane incidents?

-Nope.
-On that day, who drove to the beach?

I did.

-Did you obey all the traffic laws?
-Yes.

So right up until that moment
that you kicked your wife. . .

. . .you were behaving
in a normal manner?

Yes.

-You don't know what possessed you?
-Right.

Your wife had an affair five months
prior to her death, didn't she?

-We had put that behind us.
-Yeah. You put it behind you.

-Did you ever hit your wife?
-No.

Do you recognize that woman?

That's my neighbor Helen Patterson.

-What's your relationship with her?
-We're friendly.

I'm about to call her as an
impeachment witness, sir.

She heard an argument
between you and your late wife. . .

. . .the week before her death.
She heard your wife plead with you. . .

. . .to stop hitting her.

I will not ask you again, sir.
Did you ever hit your wife before?

Once I kind of slapped her.

But I never hurt her.
And it was a mistake.

A mistake.

I'm sorry. I should've told you.

But I thought if it got out
I had swatted her. . . .

I know it sounds crazy,
but I swear, I loved my wife.

-And I would never, ever do anything--
-Damn it!

-I'm sorry.
-Never mind sorry.

You lean on me, sit on me. . .

. . .now you hang your coat
on me. It's like I'm not even there.

You're not there sometimes.
I don't see you.

What do you mean?

When I slapped my wife,
I thought she was a mosquito.

When I leaned on you, and just now,
I thought you were a coat rack.

-I beg your pardon?
-I wish I could explain it.

Sometimes you look
like a coat rack to me.

Just like Janet
looked like a soccer ball.

-How long has this been going on?
-About a year.

Sometimes I look at people. . .

. . .and I see inanimate objects.
Or. . . .

Why didn't you tell somebody?

It's hard enough to sell the idea that
I saw my wife as a soccer ball.

That I also saw her as a bug,
or people as coat racks. . . .

Now, you've been treated
thus far by psychiatrists?

Yes.

I think it's time
you saw a neurologist.

Love America 's sign

And on a star-spangled night
My love

You can rest your head
On my shoulder

I will defend your right to cry

This is one great crowd!

You guys ready for some music?

Here's the story
Of a lovely lady

Who was bringing up
Three very lovely girls

All of them had hair ofgold
Like their mother

The youngest one in curls

Isn't it great to be
in a bar in Boston?

Speaking of bars in Boston. . . .

Making your way in the world today
Takes everything you've got

Taking a break from all your worries
Sure would help a lot

Wouldn 't you like to get away?

Everybody.

Sometimes you wanna go
Where everybody knows your name

-Are you for real?
-She's good.

How about this one?

Welcome back
Your dreams were your ticket out

Welcome back to that same old place
That you laughed about

Help me out, sir.

The names have all changed
Since you hung around

But those dreams have remained
And they'll turn around

I see we're in the right group.

Everybody happy?

Everybody on this one.

-Sunday Monday happy days
-Tuesday Wednesday happy days

-Thursday Friday happy days
-The weekend comes

My cycle hums
Ready to race to you

These days are all

I admit it, the woman knows
how to work a room.

It's so difficult
to get Elaine to sing.

Yours and mine

-Why is the spotlight on me?
-I'm sure there's a good reason.

How will you make it on your own?

Oh, God.

This world is awfully big
And girl, this time you're all alone

Well it's time you started living

It's time you let someone else
Do some giving

Love is all around
No need to waste it

You can have a time
Why don 't you take it?

You mightjust make it after all

You're gonna make it after all

I'm sorry.

I should've interviewed
the neighbor. I wasn't prepared.

He has a degenerative tumor
in the visual part of his brain.

It can be removed. It's likely benign.
And he should be okay.

But, to him, his wife
really did look like a soccer ball.

And I was a coat rack.

MADDIE:
Call.

VICTOR:
Two pair.

You're hustling me.

Hey.

What's going on?

-She's kicking my butt.
-Where's Bonnie?

They held her over for a late show.
She would be a big hit in Boston.

What about our slumber party?

Well, she'll be back.

Just later.

Right.

Well, this gives you and I time
to spend together.

-Get to know each other.
-Great.

So tell me about yourself. Just don't
tell me you're a nightclub singer.

Good morning.

Morning.

-Is Maddie up?
-Not yet. Coffee?

-It's right there.
-The second show was even better.

I had them freak-dancing
to Green Acres.

And I thought Cleveland was nuts.

1 a.m., place is packed,
they're singing Flipper.

You should've been there.

I want Maddie to live with me.

Sorry?

I want her.

-Right.
-No, I'm serious.

Bonnie, a child needs
her mother home at night. . .

. . .not in Cleveland.

First of all, that's not fair.
And second, I am home most nights--

Since New Year's you've
been working nonstop.

Eventually, I'll settle into
a decent schedule. Right now--

You're still trying to make it.

I understand.

But I think I can provide
a better home for her.

And I want her.

It's an extremely rare phenomenon,
but it has happened.

Where people don't recognize faces?

Not just that, but the faces look
like specific inanimate objects.

Oliver Sacks wrote of a patient
who mistook his wife for a hat.

Mr. Willis evidently mistook
his for a soccer ball.

Is it dementia, doctor?

No. Which explains why his behavior
was otherwise normal.

The scans show
his temporal lobes to be intact.

But the lesions in the left hemisphere
affect his ability to visualize. . .

. . .particularly his ability
to visualize faces.

-But why a soccer ball?
-We can't really explain it.

The parietal lobes of the brain make
judgments about what the eyes see.

The tumor so compromises
that judgment. . .

. . .he thinks he sees different things.
In his wife's case, a soccer ball.

This happens to everybody
with this kind of tumor?

No. It's rare. There have only been
a few documented cases.

-How many documented cases?
-I believe about four or five.

What's the likelihood he saw a
soccer ball when he looked at his wife?

It's hard to quantify that.

One in 1 0?
One in a hundred?

One in a thousand?
One in a million?

I suppose it would be
around one in a million.

Thank you.

-It's not about what you want.
-Or you.

Her father just died.
She needs stability.

Which you don't give her staying out
past midnight singing Flipper.

-You don't know me--
-Why do you think she came here?

To meet her genetic parent.
You never heard of adopted kids--?

-You told me it was a cry for help.
-I said attention.

-There's a difference.
-Come on.

-You're a struggling nightclub singer.
-You're a lawyer.

-I know the hours you put in.
-I can be home by 6:00.

-You're just gonna change your life--?
-I am desperate to change.

Maddie doesn't even know you.

Nor do I know her. But a daughter
needs to be with her mother.

A genetic relationship does not
make a parent. If you think--

-I didn't say that.
-Yes, you did.

Let's not say things
we're gonna regret.

This should be about
what's best for her.

The fact that I am not
emotionally connected. . .

. . .might make me more objective.

And less informed.

Trust me.

Ally, you have absolutely no idea.

Being her genetic mother
doesn't make me a parent.

But it's not meaningless.

That's why adopted kids seek out their
birth parents. It means something.

And it means something to Maddie.
She showed up here.

And she did ask me to take her.

-What do you mean I can't close?
-I'm just suggesting--

I have a rapport with the jury.

We have a chance here.
This is a murder trial.

Thank you for that insight.

You've always maintained the lawyer
who tries the case should close.

So how's this different?

Richard, you're. . . .

La da da

-Easy for you to say.
-It's not easy for me to say. . .

. . .because I love you.

You're gay?

John. . . .
I support your right to choose.

I'm not gay. I'm trying to say
I love you. You're my best friend.

-So this is difficult for me to say.
-What?

You have no business being
in a courtroom, Richard.

You're a fine office manager.
Your employees are devoted to you.

But as a litigator you are a joke.

It'd be irresponsible of you to give the
closing when a man's life is on the line.

And here, one is.

You know, you're a funny little man.

Let's not turn this personal.

You turned it personal.
You called me a joke.

You derive your esteem from being
this magical little trial attorney.

-The idea I could be good threatens you.
-That's not it!

It's my client, my case, my trial,
and I will give the closing.

You were planning to introduce this.
You're a lousy trial lawyer, Richard.

I need to prepare my closing. So why
don't you scurry off into your hole.

It's not so much
I want to leave Bonnie as. . . .

-As what?
-I kind of want to get her back.

What do you mean?

She was my best friend before
Daddy died. We'd go shopping. . .

. . .we'd have sleepovers.

It was always fun
for us to be together.

Now it's different.

It has to be different, honey.
A parent has to be a parent.

There's gonna be rules and
discipline. I know you know that.

It's hard for her, Victor.

It's too much work.

I hear her cry at night.

Well, that's when grownups
do most of their crying. At night.

I want her to have the life
she wants, the life she planned.

I'll be happier that way,
and so will she.

Look at me, honey.

Do you really think you
wanna live with Ally?

I don't know.

But I have a good feeling about her.
And I also feel. . . .

You also feel what?

She really wants me.

-I think we should talk to her.
-You can't think this is her decision.

I think we should know
what she's feeling.

Well, we just heard
her feelings, didn't we?

-Is there any harm in talking to her?
-You don't have anything to lose. I do.

I love her. And I think I've done
a pretty good job of being--

I'm not judging you.

But I think Maddie came
to see me for a reason. . .

. . .and I am ready for this.

Are you?

You have a lifestyle
that makes it impossible--

It's not impossible.

For all I know,
you could be an ax murderer.

Well, see, you know
I'm not an ax murderer. . .

. . .because Maddie told me
you had a PI check me out.

Why did you do that?

Why do that if you weren't prepared
for the possibility of me parenting her?

Because I knew
she'd want to visit you.

I think you could make
for a great mother.

But at this point in your life,
your career. . . .

Be honest.

PROSECUTING ATTORNEY:
One in a million.

Those are the odds he actually
saw a soccer ball instead of his wife.

Those are the odds their
own expert gave. One in a million.

Come on, his wife had an affair.
He killed her.

His excuse is the
one-in-a-million chance. . .

. . .that he confused
her for an inanimate object.

Please.

He killed her.

And his defense
is as desperate as he is guilty.

When Janet Willis first met my client,
she wasn't interested. Really.

She dated him just for kicks.
That's what she said.

As she became interested,
she asked herself the usual questions:

"Does he make a good living?
Does he want children?

Will he be a good father?"

She neglected to ask herself. . .

. . . "Will he confuse my head
for a soccer ball?"

'Cause that could never happen.
But it did.

Kendall Willis developed
a brain tumor in his parietal lobe. . .

. . .which caused him to see things
that weren't there. Unbelievable?

Almost. Impossible?
No. It's happened on rare occasions.

As Dr. Ober testified to,
Oliver Sacks once treated a man. . .

. . .who thought his wife was a hat.

The prosecution says this is
far-fetched. And you know what? It is.

Sometimes the truth
is stranger than fiction.

Can we positively know what
Kendall Willis was seeing?

Of course not.

None of us ever have, or will,
walk a mile in his cleats.

Here's something we do know. . .

. . .here's what is impossible,
ladies and gentlemen:

You can't fake a brain tumor.

-I feel weird having to make a choice.
-We're not asking you to do that.

-You're asking me what I think.
-No, we want to know what you feel.

How I feel.

I feel like there's a hole.

A hole?

Yeah. I never had a mom.

When Daddy was alive. . .

. . .I always felt a hole, I guess.

Not knowing who you were. . . .
Something was missing.

And when he died, the hole got bigger.

And now. . . .

Can I talk to Ally alone?

Sure.

Are you ready for this? Really?

Not only am I ready,
but you just answered my question. . .

. . .as to why I'm so ready for this.

You know, I've always
had a hole too, Maddie.

I always thought it was
gonna be filled up with a man.

And yet, I could never picture him.

Well, maybe the man
turned out to be you.

Maybe it's been you.

And I know that this sounds crazy. . .

. . .but it's as if I have always
known you were out there.

Well, it's as if
a part of me just knew.

And now, it just. . . .

It just makes so much sense
that you're here.

I've spent so much money
on therapists. . .

. . .trying to figure out
who is that guy.

And now it turned out that
the guy is a 1 0-year-old girl.

And she's home.

Would I call you "Mom"?

I don't think I've quite earned that,
so why don't we start off with--

Step thing.

-Ally?
-Ally.

Can't he just read it out loud?

The foreman announces the verdict.
It's a new thing they're trying.

Mr. Foreman, has
the jury reached its verdict?

We have, Your Honor.

This is where he'll tell us.

What say you?

In the matter of the Commonwealth
v. Kendall Willis on the charge. . .

. . .of murder in the first degree,
we find the defendant not guilty.

People of the jury,
this concludes your service.

-Winning streak extended to one.
-Thank you.

-Good luck with the surgery.
-Thank you.

-John, thank you as well.
-My pleasure. Just a second.

I'm no expert on how to live life. . .

. . .but if one were in the habit
of mistaking people. . .

. . .for inanimate objects, should
he see a ball lying on the beach. . .

. . .probably best not
to run up and kick it.

Especially if one were to be having
marital difficulties with that ball.

Yeah, just a thought.

How lucky can one guy be?

I kissed her and she kissed me

Like the fellow once said
Ain 't that a kick in the head

-Richard?
-John?

I still feel estranged.

-Gee.
-I apologize for doubting you.

And I want you to know,
I feel you tried an exceptional case.

Right.

I do, Richard.

You really were great.

-I was?
-Indeed.

Well, you tumbled the brain thing.

But you tried the case.
You secured his acquittal.

And I must say, this sudden dash
for the end zone of maturity. . . .

I salute you.

I was looking for some
forward progress, that's all.

Indeed.

Again.

Tell me quick
Ain 't that a kick in the head