All language subtitles for Episode 02 I Love, Tommy

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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,959 --> 00:00:02,461 What's up, lover? 2 00:00:02,461 --> 00:00:03,711 Hey, baby. 3 00:00:03,711 --> 00:00:05,422 Fuck, baby, look at you. 4 00:00:05,422 --> 00:00:06,465 Hey, baby. 5 00:00:06,465 --> 00:00:07,466 Holy shit. 6 00:00:07,466 --> 00:00:09,801 Get in! 7 00:00:09,801 --> 00:00:11,136 Baby, I love you! 8 00:00:11,136 --> 00:00:13,138 - I love you, lover! 9 00:00:13,138 --> 00:00:15,140 Fuck. 10 00:00:15,140 --> 00:00:18,101 Wow, fuck, you are so hot. 11 00:00:18,101 --> 00:00:19,311 Baby. 12 00:00:19,311 --> 00:00:21,063 Baby. 13 00:00:21,063 --> 00:00:22,773 Yeah. 14 00:00:22,773 --> 00:00:24,816 Ah, I got it. 15 00:00:24,816 --> 00:00:26,944 Fuck yes. 16 00:00:26,944 --> 00:00:28,070 Yes. 17 00:00:28,070 --> 00:00:29,863 Ah, baby. 18 00:00:29,863 --> 00:00:30,948 I love you so much-- 19 00:00:30,948 --> 00:00:31,949 Whoa! 20 00:00:31,949 --> 00:00:32,950 Careful, baby. 21 00:00:32,950 --> 00:00:34,201 Are you okay? 22 00:00:34,201 --> 00:00:35,494 Don't hurt yourself. 23 00:00:35,494 --> 00:00:37,412 - Yes. - TOMMY: 24 00:00:37,412 --> 00:00:38,997 Fuck, I love you, gorgeous. 25 00:00:56,139 --> 00:00:58,267 Fuck! 26 00:01:04,605 --> 00:01:06,108 Oh, fuck. 27 00:01:06,108 --> 00:01:08,986 I wanna fuck you forever. 28 00:01:08,986 --> 00:01:11,613 I love you so much. 29 00:01:15,117 --> 00:01:16,410 I love you. 30 00:01:28,005 --> 00:01:29,423 Whoo! 31 00:01:39,141 --> 00:01:41,059 - Girls night! 32 00:01:42,060 --> 00:01:43,228 - Cheers! 33 00:01:45,314 --> 00:01:46,815 Mmm. 34 00:01:46,815 --> 00:01:48,191 You know what? 35 00:01:48,191 --> 00:01:50,319 I am done with bad boys. 36 00:01:50,319 --> 00:01:51,361 - Here we go. 37 00:01:51,361 --> 00:01:52,529 - I am, I'm so over 38 00:01:52,529 --> 00:01:53,905 the fights, the drama. 39 00:01:53,905 --> 00:01:55,157 - I've heard this before. 40 00:01:55,157 --> 00:01:56,283 You know what I want? 41 00:01:56,283 --> 00:01:58,618 Like, nice, sweet... regular guy. 42 00:01:58,618 --> 00:01:59,619 You know, somebody boring. 43 00:01:59,619 --> 00:02:00,620 - Yeah. 44 00:02:00,620 --> 00:02:02,539 - A doctor, lawyer. 45 00:02:02,539 --> 00:02:03,582 - Yes. 46 00:02:03,582 --> 00:02:04,583 An accountant. 47 00:02:04,583 --> 00:02:05,959 - No, please not an accountant. 48 00:02:05,959 --> 00:02:07,336 Okay. 49 00:02:07,336 --> 00:02:08,753 - Wouldn't that be nice? Wouldn't it be so nice? 50 00:02:08,753 --> 00:02:10,005 I could just like, stay home, you know, 51 00:02:10,005 --> 00:02:11,840 cook dinner, watch a movie. 52 00:02:11,840 --> 00:02:13,425 Just, you know, chill on the couch. 53 00:02:13,425 --> 00:02:14,843 - With the dogs. - Yes, with my dog 54 00:02:14,843 --> 00:02:16,762 and my cute, boring accountant boyfriend. 55 00:02:16,762 --> 00:02:18,930 - Pammy, girl, that is so what you need. 56 00:02:18,930 --> 00:02:20,057 - I know, I know. 57 00:02:20,057 --> 00:02:22,267 These rock stars, actors are fucking crazy. 58 00:02:22,267 --> 00:02:23,268 - All of 'em. 59 00:02:23,268 --> 00:02:24,519 - God, forget it, so not worth it. 60 00:02:24,519 --> 00:02:25,604 - I've been telling you that. 61 00:02:25,604 --> 00:02:27,689 - I am done with self-obsessed. 62 00:02:27,689 --> 00:02:28,690 - Yes. - And I am done 63 00:02:28,690 --> 00:02:29,691 with high-maintenance. 64 00:02:29,691 --> 00:02:30,692 Yes! 65 00:02:30,692 --> 00:02:31,735 - Hallelujah. 66 00:02:31,735 --> 00:02:33,487 - You know what? From now on, 67 00:02:33,487 --> 00:02:36,114 bad boys are out, and good boys are in. 68 00:02:36,114 --> 00:02:37,824 Yes! 69 00:02:37,824 --> 00:02:38,909 - To accountants! 70 00:02:38,909 --> 00:02:40,035 - Accountants! 71 00:02:40,035 --> 00:02:41,244 Accountants! 72 00:02:45,374 --> 00:02:46,541 - Let's get shots. 73 00:02:46,541 --> 00:02:48,710 - Tequila. - Nope. 74 00:02:48,710 --> 00:02:49,878 Goldschlager. 75 00:02:49,878 --> 00:02:52,339 You know what, the whole fucking club! 76 00:02:54,216 --> 00:02:55,592 Whoo! 77 00:03:11,400 --> 00:03:13,151 - Compliments of Pamela Anderson. 78 00:03:14,945 --> 00:03:15,946 - Who? 79 00:03:15,946 --> 00:03:17,864 - Pamela Anderson. 80 00:03:39,219 --> 00:03:40,387 - Fuck you, Tommy! 81 00:03:40,387 --> 00:03:42,013 Oh, yeah, go, Tommy! 82 00:03:42,013 --> 00:03:43,265 - For what? 83 00:03:43,265 --> 00:03:44,266 - It's just this work thing. 84 00:03:44,266 --> 00:03:45,267 Yes, the producers are 85 00:03:45,267 --> 00:03:46,268 flyin' out a bunch of, you know, 86 00:03:46,268 --> 00:03:47,519 syndicators and affiliates 87 00:03:47,519 --> 00:03:49,020 to this big fancy resort to schmooze 88 00:03:49,020 --> 00:03:50,439 and preview the new season. 89 00:03:50,439 --> 00:03:51,648 And meet Pam Anderson. 90 00:03:51,648 --> 00:03:53,316 - Yes. - That too. 91 00:03:53,316 --> 00:03:55,569 - The shit you have to go through with these guys. 92 00:03:55,569 --> 00:03:57,112 - It's fine. 93 00:04:34,441 --> 00:04:35,942 Yes, get me. 94 00:04:38,069 --> 00:04:39,154 Girl. 95 00:04:39,154 --> 00:04:40,155 - Yes. - Yeah. 96 00:04:40,155 --> 00:04:41,490 - Yes, you come to me! 97 00:04:41,490 --> 00:04:42,657 - Yes! - Yes! 98 00:04:51,750 --> 00:04:53,126 - Opa! 99 00:04:55,170 --> 00:04:56,379 I'm Greek. 100 00:04:57,672 --> 00:04:59,800 - I'm Pam. 101 00:05:41,883 --> 00:05:43,051 - We looked down and there's this, like, 102 00:05:43,051 --> 00:05:44,219 long trail of ants and he just... 103 00:05:44,219 --> 00:05:45,470 - Ants? 104 00:05:45,470 --> 00:05:47,347 No! - I shit you not! 105 00:05:47,347 --> 00:05:48,932 We're, like, yes! 106 00:05:50,767 --> 00:05:52,352 Whoo! 107 00:05:52,352 --> 00:05:54,062 - Disgusting! - Gross. 108 00:05:54,062 --> 00:05:56,022 - Hey, I gotta go drain the main vein. 109 00:05:56,022 --> 00:05:58,024 Okay. 110 00:06:00,860 --> 00:06:02,195 - Pam. - Yes, yes, yes, what? 111 00:06:02,195 --> 00:06:03,321 - He is trouble. 112 00:06:03,321 --> 00:06:04,864 - Oh, gosh, will you relax? 113 00:06:04,864 --> 00:06:06,116 - No. - Melanie, please, Melanie. 114 00:06:06,116 --> 00:06:08,285 - Promise me you're not gonna date him. 115 00:06:08,285 --> 00:06:10,287 - No, of course I'm not gonna date him, I'm not. 116 00:06:10,287 --> 00:06:11,496 - Promise. 117 00:06:11,496 --> 00:06:12,956 - I am not gonna date him, 118 00:06:12,956 --> 00:06:14,874 he's just, you know, he's just funny is all. 119 00:06:14,874 --> 00:06:16,376 Pammy, no! 120 00:06:16,376 --> 00:06:17,460 Good boys are in! 121 00:06:17,460 --> 00:06:18,795 - Good boys are in, good boys are in. 122 00:06:18,795 --> 00:06:19,796 Good boys are in, I know, I know that. 123 00:06:19,796 --> 00:06:20,964 - Okay. - It's fine. 124 00:06:20,964 --> 00:06:21,965 I'm not gonna date him. 125 00:06:21,965 --> 00:06:22,966 - Don't date him. 126 00:06:22,966 --> 00:06:23,967 - I am not gonna date him. 127 00:06:23,967 --> 00:06:25,051 Pinky. 128 00:06:28,805 --> 00:06:29,806 I'm okay. 129 00:06:29,806 --> 00:06:31,474 Really, I'm okay. 130 00:06:31,474 --> 00:06:32,517 - Hey. 131 00:06:32,517 --> 00:06:34,144 It's a very dangerous lot. 132 00:06:34,144 --> 00:06:35,645 Oh, yeah, sure. 133 00:06:35,645 --> 00:06:38,523 Lotta murders. 134 00:06:38,523 --> 00:06:39,608 I gotta go. 135 00:06:39,608 --> 00:06:40,817 It's not even 4:00! 136 00:06:40,817 --> 00:06:41,860 - I know, but-- - I have to see you 137 00:06:41,860 --> 00:06:42,902 again tomorrow. 138 00:06:42,902 --> 00:06:44,738 It is tomorrow. 139 00:06:44,738 --> 00:06:46,865 - Perfect, where are we goin'? 140 00:06:51,077 --> 00:06:53,413 Oh, God, I gotta go. 141 00:06:53,413 --> 00:06:54,914 I'm, um... 142 00:06:54,914 --> 00:06:56,082 I'm leaving for work in a few hours. 143 00:06:56,082 --> 00:06:57,083 - To where? 144 00:06:57,083 --> 00:06:58,043 - Uh, CancĂșn. 145 00:06:58,043 --> 00:06:59,044 - I fucking love CancĂșn! 146 00:06:59,044 --> 00:07:00,629 - No, it's for work! 147 00:07:00,629 --> 00:07:01,713 Not if Tommy's around! 148 00:07:01,713 --> 00:07:02,714 To--Tommy! 149 00:07:02,714 --> 00:07:03,840 Tommy, what are you-- 150 00:07:06,051 --> 00:07:07,177 Hey! 151 00:07:07,177 --> 00:07:08,720 - I'm comin'. 152 00:07:08,720 --> 00:07:09,888 - Wha--you are not. 153 00:07:09,888 --> 00:07:10,889 You are not coming. 154 00:07:10,889 --> 00:07:12,432 - Coming's what I do best. 155 00:07:14,017 --> 00:07:15,143 - Come on. - Good night. 156 00:07:15,143 --> 00:07:16,561 - No, come on, pretty please. - Tommy. 157 00:07:16,561 --> 00:07:17,646 - Can I come with you, please? - Good night, no, no. 158 00:07:17,646 --> 00:07:18,938 - Pretty please with sugar on top? 159 00:07:18,938 --> 00:07:20,273 With sugar, some sprinkles, and a cherry? 160 00:07:20,273 --> 00:07:21,900 No! 161 00:07:21,900 --> 00:07:23,026 Good night, Tommy. 162 00:07:24,944 --> 00:07:26,112 Fine. 163 00:07:28,823 --> 00:07:30,825 - Okay, only under one condition. 164 00:07:30,825 --> 00:07:32,494 - What? 165 00:07:46,299 --> 00:07:49,886 Hey, it's me, you know what to do. 166 00:08:08,530 --> 00:08:11,950 Hey, it's me, you know what to do. 167 00:08:11,950 --> 00:08:14,494 Hola, mi amor! 168 00:08:19,999 --> 00:08:24,045 CancĂșn! 169 00:08:24,045 --> 00:08:27,298 Tommy is coming... 170 00:08:27,298 --> 00:08:31,136 to CancĂșn! 171 00:08:32,971 --> 00:08:34,304 Do not come. 172 00:08:34,304 --> 00:08:36,057 Pamela! 173 00:08:36,057 --> 00:08:38,393 - Don't. - I am so stoked. 174 00:08:38,393 --> 00:08:39,977 - Tommy, Tommy. 175 00:08:39,977 --> 00:08:41,770 Come on, we're gonna have a blast. 176 00:08:41,770 --> 00:08:43,231 - Do not. 177 00:08:43,231 --> 00:08:44,983 Come. 178 00:08:44,983 --> 00:08:46,943 I'm fucking coming. 179 00:08:46,943 --> 00:08:49,863 Goodbye, Tommy. 180 00:08:52,490 --> 00:08:54,534 Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. 181 00:08:54,534 --> 00:08:55,535 Welcome aboard Flight 185. 182 00:08:55,535 --> 00:08:56,703 - You okay? - Hmm? 183 00:08:56,703 --> 00:08:58,121 - You okay? 184 00:08:58,121 --> 00:08:59,456 - Yeah, I'm fine. 185 00:08:59,456 --> 00:09:01,082 ...with your seatbelts fastened. 186 00:09:01,082 --> 00:09:02,625 Flight attendants, please prepare for departure. 187 00:09:29,986 --> 00:09:30,987 - Hi there, how are you? 188 00:09:30,987 --> 00:09:32,113 - Hello, and welcome 189 00:09:32,113 --> 00:09:33,114 to the Ritz-Carlton, Ms. Anderson. 190 00:09:33,114 --> 00:09:34,532 - Thank you. 191 00:09:34,532 --> 00:09:35,658 - These are your keys. - What time 192 00:09:35,658 --> 00:09:36,993 is this thing till? 193 00:09:36,993 --> 00:09:38,119 And these were left for you. 194 00:09:39,496 --> 00:09:41,414 - Oh, my gosh, who is this from? 195 00:09:41,414 --> 00:09:43,333 - Oh, there's a card, open it. 196 00:09:43,333 --> 00:09:46,002 - No, it's probably just a fan. 197 00:09:46,002 --> 00:09:47,170 - Come on, just fucking open it. 198 00:09:47,170 --> 00:09:48,171 - Oh, my God. 199 00:09:51,132 --> 00:09:53,301 - What does it say? - I'm opening it. 200 00:09:53,301 --> 00:09:55,512 Mm-hmm. 201 00:09:55,512 --> 00:09:58,431 - "Here's to a kickass, unforgettable weekend." 202 00:09:58,431 --> 00:10:00,058 - From? 203 00:10:00,058 --> 00:10:01,518 - Simon. 204 00:10:01,518 --> 00:10:03,770 And the gang at ITC Telepictures Worldwide. 205 00:10:03,770 --> 00:10:04,896 - Wow. 206 00:10:04,896 --> 00:10:05,939 Beautiful. 207 00:10:07,774 --> 00:10:08,775 - Hmm. 208 00:10:10,026 --> 00:10:12,320 Please welcome Pamela Anderson. 209 00:10:25,458 --> 00:10:26,459 - Beautiful. 210 00:10:27,335 --> 00:10:28,837 - Yes, hi. 211 00:10:28,837 --> 00:10:29,838 How are you? 212 00:10:29,838 --> 00:10:31,214 - Such a pleasure to meet you. 213 00:10:31,214 --> 00:10:32,715 - How's it going? Hey. - Ever been to Grand Rapids? 214 00:10:32,715 --> 00:10:34,300 You are massive there. 215 00:10:34,300 --> 00:10:36,302 - Fred Acters from KDFI. 216 00:10:36,302 --> 00:10:37,929 - Ooh, hi, Fred, nice tie. 217 00:10:37,929 --> 00:10:39,556 - It's such an honor to meet you. 218 00:10:39,556 --> 00:10:41,182 - Wow, you're even prettier in person. 219 00:10:41,182 --> 00:10:42,392 - Ooh, firm shake, hi. 220 00:10:42,392 --> 00:10:44,269 James Zellner, Dayton, Ohio. 221 00:10:44,269 --> 00:10:45,478 Oh, God, there's so many of you. 222 00:10:45,478 --> 00:10:46,563 It's so exciting. 223 00:10:46,563 --> 00:10:47,772 We're gonna have a fun time tonight. 224 00:10:47,772 --> 00:10:49,315 So I have to ask. 225 00:10:49,315 --> 00:10:50,733 - Mm-hmm? - Is "Baywatch," like, 226 00:10:50,733 --> 00:10:51,818 the best job? 227 00:10:51,818 --> 00:10:52,819 Oh, yeah. 228 00:10:52,819 --> 00:10:53,945 I love it, I get to go 229 00:10:53,945 --> 00:10:55,405 to the beach every day, it's great. 230 00:10:55,405 --> 00:10:56,781 - I understand you're from Canada. 231 00:10:56,781 --> 00:10:57,949 - Yes, I am. 232 00:10:57,949 --> 00:10:58,992 - I used to work in Calgary. 233 00:10:58,992 --> 00:11:00,243 - Oh, wow. - CBRT. 234 00:11:00,243 --> 00:11:01,327 Got everything in Calgary. 235 00:11:01,327 --> 00:11:02,620 - I hope so. 236 00:11:02,620 --> 00:11:04,330 - I was a station manager up there. 237 00:11:04,330 --> 00:11:05,540 What part are you from? 238 00:11:05,540 --> 00:11:06,708 - I'm from Ladysmith. 239 00:11:06,708 --> 00:11:07,792 - Ladysmith. - Mm-hmm. 240 00:11:07,792 --> 00:11:09,043 - Where's that at? 241 00:11:09,043 --> 00:11:11,087 - Uh, near Vancouver. It's pretty small. 242 00:11:11,087 --> 00:11:12,088 Vancouver. 243 00:11:12,088 --> 00:11:13,131 CIVT, 244 00:11:13,131 --> 00:11:14,382 our sister station. 245 00:11:14,382 --> 00:11:16,050 - Ah. - Tell her the Jerry story. 246 00:11:16,050 --> 00:11:17,844 - A really funny story about their transmitter-- 247 00:11:17,844 --> 00:11:19,345 - I'm sorry, um, Ms. Anderson, 248 00:11:19,345 --> 00:11:20,805 there's a phone call for you. 249 00:11:20,805 --> 00:11:21,890 He says it's urgent. 250 00:11:21,890 --> 00:11:23,016 - Oh, who? 251 00:11:23,016 --> 00:11:25,018 - A Mr. Wiener? 252 00:11:27,103 --> 00:11:29,522 A Hugh G. Wiener. 253 00:11:36,654 --> 00:11:39,240 Excuse me. 254 00:11:39,240 --> 00:11:40,491 Mm-hmm. 255 00:11:42,243 --> 00:11:43,995 - Are you crazy? 256 00:11:43,995 --> 00:11:45,622 Kinda, yeah. 257 00:11:45,622 --> 00:11:47,957 How did you find me? 258 00:11:47,957 --> 00:11:49,334 Easy. 259 00:11:49,334 --> 00:11:51,127 Just call every hotel in the CancĂșn area. 260 00:11:51,127 --> 00:11:52,629 - Oh, my God. 261 00:11:52,629 --> 00:11:54,297 93rd time's the charm. 262 00:11:54,297 --> 00:11:55,673 Well... 263 00:11:55,673 --> 00:11:56,841 you do get points for effort, 264 00:11:56,841 --> 00:11:59,135 but you are still not coming down. 265 00:11:59,969 --> 00:12:02,096 You're right. 266 00:12:02,096 --> 00:12:03,806 'Cause I'm already here. 267 00:12:03,806 --> 00:12:04,849 - No, you're not. 268 00:12:04,849 --> 00:12:06,935 I'm here! 269 00:12:06,935 --> 00:12:08,186 - What? 270 00:12:08,186 --> 00:12:09,354 - You don't believe me? - Shut up. 271 00:12:09,354 --> 00:12:10,813 Hear that? 272 00:12:12,106 --> 00:12:14,609 That's fucking Mexico. 273 00:12:14,609 --> 00:12:17,570 Hey, what's up, amigos? 274 00:12:17,570 --> 00:12:19,656 Yo soy Tommy Lee! 275 00:12:19,656 --> 00:12:22,784 El mucho sexy drummer de Motley Crue! 276 00:12:22,784 --> 00:12:24,285 Whoo! 277 00:12:25,662 --> 00:12:27,205 So where are we all hangin' tonight? 278 00:12:27,205 --> 00:12:28,248 - We all? 279 00:12:28,248 --> 00:12:29,415 - Yeah. 280 00:12:29,415 --> 00:12:31,125 You and your girls and me and my boys. 281 00:12:32,669 --> 00:12:33,878 - Your boys? 282 00:12:33,878 --> 00:12:34,879 Yup. 283 00:12:34,879 --> 00:12:36,214 Come on, I wasn't gonna come solo. 284 00:12:36,214 --> 00:12:37,757 I didn't want you to think I was some 285 00:12:37,757 --> 00:12:39,092 crazy psycho stalker. 286 00:12:39,092 --> 00:12:41,010 - Huh, wouldn't want that. 287 00:12:42,971 --> 00:12:44,722 - So where are we going? 288 00:12:44,722 --> 00:12:46,474 Tommy, I'm here for work. 289 00:12:46,474 --> 00:12:47,642 - One drink. 290 00:12:47,642 --> 00:12:49,310 - No. I'm at a thing. 291 00:12:49,310 --> 00:12:50,853 - And you're bored out of your skull. 292 00:12:50,853 --> 00:12:52,105 - No, I'm not. 293 00:12:52,105 --> 00:12:53,314 - You so are. 294 00:12:53,314 --> 00:12:54,399 How do you know? 295 00:12:56,317 --> 00:12:59,487 - Kept you on the phone this long, haven't I? 296 00:12:59,487 --> 00:13:01,322 Figures were going out of range, and... 297 00:13:01,322 --> 00:13:02,323 Yeah, yeah. 298 00:13:02,323 --> 00:13:03,658 - So then he says, 299 00:13:03,658 --> 00:13:05,118 "Well, maybe we could attach a signal boost." 300 00:13:05,118 --> 00:13:06,119 What? 301 00:13:06,119 --> 00:13:07,620 - And I'm like, "Jerry, 302 00:13:07,620 --> 00:13:09,122 you couldn't amplify that sucker enough 303 00:13:09,122 --> 00:13:11,457 to reach Edmonton, much less Winnipeg!" 304 00:13:16,879 --> 00:13:18,298 - I mean, I like the guy. - Classic joke. 305 00:13:18,298 --> 00:13:19,382 - I'm sorry, I'll be right back. 306 00:13:19,382 --> 00:13:20,383 Oh, sure. 307 00:13:25,013 --> 00:13:26,097 This man is a stalker. 308 00:13:26,097 --> 00:13:27,432 He's not a stalker. 309 00:13:27,432 --> 00:13:29,308 - He followed you to Mexico against your wishes. 310 00:13:29,308 --> 00:13:31,269 That is the literal definition. - Yeah, well, you know, 311 00:13:31,269 --> 00:13:32,353 it's not like I'll be alone with him. 312 00:13:32,353 --> 00:13:33,855 You guys will be there. 313 00:13:33,855 --> 00:13:35,523 I know how these things start with you. 314 00:13:35,523 --> 00:13:38,109 - Oh, it's not like I even take him seriously, 315 00:13:38,109 --> 00:13:39,360 I'm just, you know. 316 00:13:39,360 --> 00:13:40,653 That's how these things start with you. 317 00:13:40,653 --> 00:13:42,071 You say you don't take them seriously, 318 00:13:42,071 --> 00:13:43,781 then you end up dating them for three years. 319 00:13:43,781 --> 00:13:45,867 - Oh, my God, that is so not true! 320 00:13:47,535 --> 00:13:49,203 Scott Baio. 321 00:13:49,203 --> 00:13:50,204 Fine. 322 00:13:50,204 --> 00:13:51,247 One. 323 00:13:51,247 --> 00:13:52,248 Bret Michaels. 324 00:13:52,248 --> 00:13:53,916 David Charvet. 325 00:13:53,916 --> 00:13:56,127 - Oh, Melanie, come on, I'm so not staying in tonight. 326 00:13:56,127 --> 00:13:57,837 - Come on, we can make it a girls night! 327 00:13:59,297 --> 00:14:01,007 Oh, you know what, if we go out, 328 00:14:01,007 --> 00:14:03,176 there's gonna be boys, so it might as well be them. 329 00:14:03,176 --> 00:14:04,719 - Them? 330 00:14:04,719 --> 00:14:05,720 Mm-hmm. 331 00:14:05,720 --> 00:14:06,971 - Oh, hell no. 332 00:14:06,971 --> 00:14:08,806 Pam! 333 00:14:27,366 --> 00:14:28,993 Look at you. 334 00:14:30,536 --> 00:14:33,998 - You are, without a doubt, 335 00:14:33,998 --> 00:14:35,291 the most fuck-- 336 00:14:35,291 --> 00:14:37,251 - I'm sorry, 337 00:14:37,251 --> 00:14:39,504 I'm afraid the bar has a dress code. 338 00:14:42,757 --> 00:14:44,509 - I got a shirt and shoes. 339 00:14:44,509 --> 00:14:46,344 - I see that. 340 00:14:46,344 --> 00:14:48,513 But... - But what? 341 00:14:50,056 --> 00:14:51,265 - Tommy, it's okay. 342 00:14:51,265 --> 00:14:52,683 It's not okay. 343 00:14:52,683 --> 00:14:55,228 This dude is-- is discriminating me. 344 00:14:55,228 --> 00:14:56,521 Am I not wearing a shirt and shoes? 345 00:14:56,521 --> 00:14:57,730 Oh, dear. 346 00:14:57,730 --> 00:14:59,190 - A dress code isn't always just about 347 00:14:59,190 --> 00:15:00,900 shirt and shoes. 348 00:15:00,900 --> 00:15:02,151 Okay. 349 00:15:02,151 --> 00:15:03,861 Okay, you know what? 350 00:15:03,861 --> 00:15:04,862 Fuck you. 351 00:15:04,862 --> 00:15:05,863 Bro. 352 00:15:05,863 --> 00:15:07,031 Fuck you. 353 00:15:07,031 --> 00:15:10,118 And fuck your, uh, stuffy-ass bar too. 354 00:15:11,494 --> 00:15:12,495 All right. 355 00:15:12,495 --> 00:15:13,913 Let's go. 356 00:15:15,665 --> 00:15:17,708 I know a way cooler spot. 357 00:15:59,125 --> 00:16:00,501 Yo, gimme an S! 358 00:16:00,501 --> 00:16:01,502 S! 359 00:16:01,502 --> 00:16:02,587 - Gimme an E! 360 00:16:02,587 --> 00:16:04,255 - E! - Gimme an X! 361 00:16:04,255 --> 00:16:05,339 X! 362 00:16:05,339 --> 00:16:06,841 - What's that spell? 363 00:16:06,841 --> 00:16:08,134 Sex! 364 00:16:16,642 --> 00:16:18,436 Care for another? 365 00:16:18,436 --> 00:16:19,896 Sure. 366 00:16:19,896 --> 00:16:22,190 - Whoo! 367 00:16:23,774 --> 00:16:25,693 - What? 368 00:16:30,740 --> 00:16:33,075 - Nice! 369 00:16:33,075 --> 00:16:35,203 Thanks, buddy! 370 00:16:38,706 --> 00:16:40,041 Whoo! 371 00:16:40,041 --> 00:16:43,502 Yeah! 372 00:16:43,502 --> 00:16:45,379 - Thank you! Thank you! 373 00:16:45,379 --> 00:16:47,840 You are extremely welcome. 374 00:16:47,840 --> 00:16:50,801 - Ah. 375 00:16:50,801 --> 00:16:52,970 - What is that? 376 00:16:54,138 --> 00:16:56,390 - Love. 377 00:16:57,850 --> 00:16:59,393 - Cheers. 378 00:17:41,310 --> 00:17:42,812 - Whoa. 379 00:17:42,812 --> 00:17:45,189 Oh, my God. 380 00:17:45,189 --> 00:17:47,316 Dude! 381 00:17:47,316 --> 00:17:51,487 - You fucking...kidding me? - You like it? 382 00:17:51,487 --> 00:17:53,281 Yes! 383 00:17:56,367 --> 00:17:58,494 Whoo! 384 00:17:58,494 --> 00:18:00,162 - Oh. 385 00:18:00,162 --> 00:18:02,248 Oh, my God. 386 00:18:02,248 --> 00:18:03,791 Oh. 387 00:18:09,046 --> 00:18:11,882 Oh, fuck. 388 00:18:11,882 --> 00:18:13,551 Dude. 389 00:18:47,251 --> 00:18:50,004 Mm. 390 00:19:11,442 --> 00:19:14,612 Would you like...to meet him? 391 00:19:16,072 --> 00:19:19,075 - Yes, I would. 392 00:19:35,549 --> 00:19:38,219 He's beautiful. 393 00:20:44,326 --> 00:20:46,620 Tommy. 394 00:21:01,802 --> 00:21:05,973 I'm...in love. 395 00:21:05,973 --> 00:21:08,225 I think she's the one. 396 00:21:08,225 --> 00:21:10,936 You really think so? 397 00:21:10,936 --> 00:21:12,688 I do. 398 00:21:12,688 --> 00:21:14,398 Oh, I hate those words. 399 00:21:14,398 --> 00:21:16,358 "I do." 400 00:21:16,358 --> 00:21:18,736 Sometimes, 401 00:21:18,736 --> 00:21:20,654 they gotta be said. 402 00:21:20,654 --> 00:21:24,658 Fuck. 403 00:21:24,658 --> 00:21:25,868 What? 404 00:21:25,868 --> 00:21:28,037 - Well, we've been down this road before. 405 00:21:28,037 --> 00:21:29,371 And it never ends well. 406 00:21:32,208 --> 00:21:33,918 - This is different. - Really? 407 00:21:33,918 --> 00:21:35,294 She is different. 408 00:21:35,294 --> 00:21:36,796 Oh, come on, they're all different. 409 00:21:36,796 --> 00:21:38,464 - You saw her. 410 00:21:38,464 --> 00:21:42,176 She's fuckin'... 411 00:21:42,176 --> 00:21:43,344 perfect. 412 00:21:43,344 --> 00:21:44,470 - So is Heather! 413 00:21:44,470 --> 00:21:45,471 Hello? 414 00:21:45,471 --> 00:21:46,680 - Heather was... 415 00:21:46,680 --> 00:21:47,723 too conservative. 416 00:21:47,723 --> 00:21:48,724 Oh. 417 00:21:48,724 --> 00:21:49,725 - Pam knows how to have fun. 418 00:21:50,976 --> 00:21:52,144 - She can be wild. 419 00:21:52,144 --> 00:21:54,355 - We can be wild together. - Come on. 420 00:21:54,355 --> 00:21:55,856 - I don't have to change who I am as a person. 421 00:21:55,856 --> 00:21:57,024 Tommy, Tommy! 422 00:21:57,024 --> 00:21:58,025 - What? 423 00:21:58,025 --> 00:21:59,443 - You sound fucking ridiculous. 424 00:21:59,443 --> 00:22:01,070 It's just how I feel. 425 00:22:02,279 --> 00:22:04,114 I'm in love, bro! 426 00:22:04,114 --> 00:22:06,867 Sorry, that's just the E talking. 427 00:22:06,867 --> 00:22:09,662 - It's the T. As in Tommy Lee. 428 00:22:09,662 --> 00:22:11,372 Oh, don't do that. 429 00:22:11,372 --> 00:22:12,373 You listen to me, 430 00:22:12,373 --> 00:22:13,666 you have just gotten divorced. 431 00:22:13,666 --> 00:22:14,667 - I don't care. 432 00:22:14,667 --> 00:22:15,626 We gotta keep this 433 00:22:15,626 --> 00:22:17,503 pussy train rolling! 434 00:22:17,503 --> 00:22:19,171 Do you hear me? - Sorry, bro, 435 00:22:19,171 --> 00:22:20,381 I'm jumping off. 436 00:22:20,381 --> 00:22:21,840 - Come on, what about Jenny McCarthy? 437 00:22:21,840 --> 00:22:22,842 - What about? 438 00:22:22,842 --> 00:22:23,842 - Guarantee we could fuck her! 439 00:22:23,842 --> 00:22:25,594 - Hmm, not interested. 440 00:22:25,594 --> 00:22:27,096 Denise fucking Richards? 441 00:22:27,096 --> 00:22:28,430 You saw her scoping you out at 442 00:22:28,430 --> 00:22:30,015 the Halloween party at the Playboy mansion. 443 00:22:30,015 --> 00:22:31,016 - Pass. - You're passing 444 00:22:31,016 --> 00:22:32,101 on Denise fucking Richards? 445 00:22:32,101 --> 00:22:33,310 - On all of 'em. 446 00:22:33,310 --> 00:22:34,645 - Tommy, you're not thinking clearly. 447 00:22:34,645 --> 00:22:36,313 My thinking is crystal. 448 00:22:36,313 --> 00:22:37,398 - Dude. 449 00:22:37,398 --> 00:22:38,524 Do not fuck this up. 450 00:22:38,524 --> 00:22:42,027 - Pam...and Tommy. 451 00:22:42,027 --> 00:22:43,821 Don't do this, man. 452 00:22:43,821 --> 00:22:45,990 Do not fucking do this. 453 00:22:45,990 --> 00:22:47,950 - Forever. - Fuck me! 454 00:22:53,163 --> 00:22:55,249 Tommy. 455 00:23:05,342 --> 00:23:08,137 Let's keep this party goin'. 456 00:23:08,137 --> 00:23:09,179 Tommy. 457 00:23:09,179 --> 00:23:12,349 - Yes, Pamela. 458 00:23:12,349 --> 00:23:14,685 I don't do drugs. 459 00:23:17,271 --> 00:23:19,898 - Oh, I mean it, Tommy, I'm a good girl. 460 00:23:19,898 --> 00:23:21,442 I am, I'm a good Christian girl 461 00:23:21,442 --> 00:23:23,277 from small-town Canada. 462 00:23:32,202 --> 00:23:33,954 Yeah. 463 00:23:38,667 --> 00:23:41,503 - The body of Christ. 464 00:25:29,403 --> 00:25:32,114 - She's the one, bro. 465 00:25:32,114 --> 00:25:34,700 Can't even imagine. 466 00:25:34,700 --> 00:25:35,826 - Imagine what? 467 00:25:35,826 --> 00:25:37,619 - What it must be like to tap that. 468 00:25:39,079 --> 00:25:41,206 I know. 469 00:25:41,206 --> 00:25:43,459 It's gonna be mind-blowing. 470 00:25:46,253 --> 00:25:47,421 - What? 471 00:25:47,421 --> 00:25:49,048 - You haven't fucked her yet? 472 00:25:49,048 --> 00:25:50,758 - Nuh-uh. - Oh, shit, 473 00:25:50,758 --> 00:25:52,885 what the fuck you been doin' the last four days? 474 00:25:52,885 --> 00:25:55,596 - Just, like, exploring? 475 00:25:55,596 --> 00:25:58,474 - Oh, I'm sure it's fucking amazing, but still. 476 00:25:58,474 --> 00:26:00,017 You gotta hit that. 477 00:26:00,017 --> 00:26:01,518 - Oh, I will. 478 00:26:01,518 --> 00:26:02,519 Eventually. 479 00:26:02,519 --> 00:26:04,730 Eventually? 480 00:26:04,730 --> 00:26:06,440 - I'm gonna wait. 481 00:26:06,440 --> 00:26:07,816 Till our wedding night. 482 00:26:07,816 --> 00:26:10,235 - Oh, oh. - Yeah. 483 00:26:13,405 --> 00:26:15,449 To everlasting love. 484 00:26:27,586 --> 00:26:29,213 Yo, what're you-- 485 00:26:29,213 --> 00:26:30,422 - Pamela! 486 00:26:30,422 --> 00:26:32,299 - Yes, Tommy? 487 00:26:34,510 --> 00:26:37,679 - You are by far the baddest, 488 00:26:37,679 --> 00:26:41,350 raddest, sexiest, most far-out, 489 00:26:41,350 --> 00:26:43,727 kickass chick that I've ever met! 490 00:26:43,727 --> 00:26:45,604 Next to you, 491 00:26:45,604 --> 00:26:47,397 Carmen Electra's a hack! 492 00:26:48,524 --> 00:26:51,276 You make Jenna Jameson look like a four! 493 00:26:53,070 --> 00:26:57,241 - I can think of nothing that I would rather do 494 00:26:57,241 --> 00:27:01,161 than spend the rest of my life just 495 00:27:01,161 --> 00:27:03,080 loving the shit out of you! 496 00:27:06,959 --> 00:27:08,126 Pamela... 497 00:27:08,126 --> 00:27:10,128 - Yes, Tommy? 498 00:27:12,881 --> 00:27:14,299 Shit. 499 00:27:17,344 --> 00:27:19,930 - Would you do me the insane honor of... 500 00:27:22,099 --> 00:27:24,434 Being my wife? 501 00:27:26,645 --> 00:27:29,398 Okay. 502 00:27:49,167 --> 00:27:50,627 Hey, señor! 503 00:27:52,921 --> 00:27:54,339 - God! - We're getting married! 504 00:27:54,339 --> 00:27:55,883 - A padre? - SĂ­! 505 00:27:55,883 --> 00:27:56,967 - Uh, yeah. 506 00:27:56,967 --> 00:27:58,427 Yay! 507 00:27:58,427 --> 00:28:00,053 Come on, baby! 508 00:28:00,053 --> 00:28:02,806 Here we go. Let's go. 509 00:28:08,645 --> 00:28:10,439 Pamela! 510 00:28:10,439 --> 00:28:11,523 Yes! 511 00:28:11,523 --> 00:28:12,774 Hi! 512 00:28:12,774 --> 00:28:14,693 Are you a priest? 513 00:28:14,693 --> 00:28:15,861 SĂ­. 514 00:28:15,861 --> 00:28:17,571 Thank fucking God. 515 00:28:17,571 --> 00:28:19,364 Yes! 516 00:28:27,497 --> 00:28:29,416 - You may kiss the bride. 517 00:28:49,061 --> 00:28:51,355 - We're fucking married! 518 00:29:18,298 --> 00:29:20,217 - I'm gonna service you for the rest of my life. 519 00:30:08,390 --> 00:30:10,434 Fuck. 520 00:30:10,434 --> 00:30:12,352 So, um... - Mm? 521 00:30:12,352 --> 00:30:15,105 - Like, what's your favorite movie? 522 00:30:16,982 --> 00:30:19,568 - Um... 523 00:30:19,568 --> 00:30:23,030 Uh, you mean like, of all time? 524 00:30:23,030 --> 00:30:25,949 Um, "Pretty Woman." 525 00:30:25,949 --> 00:30:27,159 - Cool. - Yeah. 526 00:30:27,159 --> 00:30:29,453 I love--I love romantic movies. 527 00:30:29,453 --> 00:30:31,329 Yeah, you know, like, "Ghost," 528 00:30:31,329 --> 00:30:32,914 uh, "Sleepless in Seattle." 529 00:30:32,914 --> 00:30:34,833 - Mm. 530 00:30:36,501 --> 00:30:38,086 - You? 531 00:30:38,086 --> 00:30:39,921 - Favorite movie? - Yeah. 532 00:30:39,921 --> 00:30:41,923 Shit, I got a ton. 533 00:30:41,923 --> 00:30:44,760 Um, "Child's Play." 534 00:30:44,760 --> 00:30:46,178 "Nightmare on Elm Street." 535 00:30:46,178 --> 00:30:48,764 Um, "Hellraiser 2," "Candyman." 536 00:30:51,475 --> 00:30:53,185 - You like the scary stuff. 537 00:30:53,185 --> 00:30:54,936 - Yeah, horror, that's my jam. 538 00:31:02,360 --> 00:31:05,155 What's your favorite food? 539 00:31:07,032 --> 00:31:09,159 - French fries. 540 00:31:14,039 --> 00:31:16,208 I fuckin' love French fries. 541 00:31:35,519 --> 00:31:37,104 - Pam, over here. 542 00:31:38,605 --> 00:31:40,065 - Pam! - Pamela! 543 00:31:46,696 --> 00:31:48,031 - When's the honeymoon? - Pam! 544 00:31:48,031 --> 00:31:50,450 Is it true you just met? Was it love at first sight? 545 00:31:55,122 --> 00:31:56,498 - Can we see the ring, Pam? 546 00:32:17,602 --> 00:32:20,689 Pam, how long you guys been together? 547 00:32:23,483 --> 00:32:25,485 - Fuckin' ass. 548 00:32:27,737 --> 00:32:29,823 - Fuck you! - Oh, my God, baby. 549 00:32:29,823 --> 00:32:31,616 - Oh, my God. 550 00:32:31,616 --> 00:32:34,619 Jesus. Dude. 551 00:32:36,288 --> 00:32:37,372 You're famous. 552 00:32:37,372 --> 00:32:38,665 No. 553 00:32:38,665 --> 00:32:39,958 No, we're famous. 554 00:32:45,088 --> 00:32:47,883 - Where we going? 555 00:32:47,883 --> 00:32:49,384 - Oh. 556 00:32:49,384 --> 00:32:51,219 You mean, 557 00:32:51,219 --> 00:32:53,972 you mean whose house? 558 00:32:53,972 --> 00:32:55,891 - Where we gonna live? 559 00:32:55,891 --> 00:32:57,767 Where do you live? 560 00:32:58,768 --> 00:33:00,937 Uh, I live in the Hills. 561 00:33:00,937 --> 00:33:04,149 Hollywood Hills above Sunset. 562 00:33:04,149 --> 00:33:05,525 You? 563 00:33:05,525 --> 00:33:07,819 - Malibu. 564 00:33:07,819 --> 00:33:09,154 - I love Malibu. 565 00:33:09,154 --> 00:33:10,989 - Yeah, I got this 566 00:33:10,989 --> 00:33:13,450 fat-ass crib around the top of a hill. 567 00:33:13,450 --> 00:33:14,826 Actually, you know what? 568 00:33:14,826 --> 00:33:16,745 That's, uh, timing's perfect 569 00:33:16,745 --> 00:33:18,914 'cause I'm--I'm about to start this big-ass renovation. 570 00:33:18,914 --> 00:33:19,956 - Oh, yeah, you are? 571 00:33:19,956 --> 00:33:21,249 - Yeah, we could renovate together. 572 00:33:21,249 --> 00:33:22,792 I mean, like, we could custom build 573 00:33:22,792 --> 00:33:26,755 our own little private...love palace. 574 00:33:26,755 --> 00:33:28,256 - Let's live there. 575 00:33:28,256 --> 00:33:29,799 - Really? 576 00:33:29,799 --> 00:33:31,259 - Yeah. 577 00:33:31,259 --> 00:33:32,260 Yeah! 578 00:33:32,260 --> 00:33:34,930 All right. 579 00:33:34,930 --> 00:33:36,806 Let's do it. 580 00:33:41,895 --> 00:33:42,896 Our own fortress of solitude. 581 00:33:42,896 --> 00:33:44,314 Over there, that'll be, like, 582 00:33:44,314 --> 00:33:45,357 a Zen garden. 583 00:33:45,357 --> 00:33:46,524 - Yeah? - And there, you know, 584 00:33:46,524 --> 00:33:49,069 a waterfall flowing into, uh, a koi pond. 585 00:33:49,069 --> 00:33:50,946 You know, just fucking--super fucking chill. 586 00:33:50,946 --> 00:33:52,906 - So Buddhist. - Yeah, totally. 587 00:33:52,906 --> 00:33:54,866 - Hey, you know what'd be awesome? 588 00:33:54,866 --> 00:33:56,993 How about a meditation gazebo? 589 00:33:56,993 --> 00:33:58,954 - Snap! - Yes, you know, 590 00:33:58,954 --> 00:34:00,914 whenever--whenever life gets too chaotic and stuff, 591 00:34:00,914 --> 00:34:02,499 we can just go in and just... - Yeah, just pop in. 592 00:34:02,499 --> 00:34:04,084 - We can center ourselves. - Hop in the koi pond 593 00:34:04,084 --> 00:34:05,168 and chill your fucking shit out. 594 00:34:05,168 --> 00:34:06,378 You know what, 595 00:34:06,378 --> 00:34:07,545 I've been really into TM lately. 596 00:34:07,545 --> 00:34:09,380 - I love TM. - You do, do you practice? 597 00:34:09,380 --> 00:34:10,382 Yeah, I do it all the time. 598 00:34:10,382 --> 00:34:11,424 Ever since I started, you know, 599 00:34:11,424 --> 00:34:12,801 I've just been, like, 600 00:34:12,801 --> 00:34:14,678 way more chill and ca-- 601 00:34:14,678 --> 00:34:17,264 Hey! 602 00:34:17,264 --> 00:34:19,349 - Hey! 603 00:34:19,349 --> 00:34:20,600 Get the fuck outta here! - Tommy! 604 00:34:20,600 --> 00:34:21,935 - I fucking see you, motherfucker! 605 00:34:21,935 --> 00:34:22,978 - Tommy, what're you doing? 606 00:34:22,978 --> 00:34:24,187 - I see you! 607 00:34:24,187 --> 00:34:25,438 Yeah, get the fuck outta here, 608 00:34:25,438 --> 00:34:26,648 stalker-azzi piece of shit! 609 00:34:26,648 --> 00:34:27,649 - Do you wanna get sued? 610 00:34:27,649 --> 00:34:28,733 Come on. 611 00:34:28,733 --> 00:34:29,775 Calm down. - We should be suing him! 612 00:34:29,775 --> 00:34:31,319 For invasion of privacy! 613 00:34:31,319 --> 00:34:32,320 - It's okay, it's okay. 614 00:34:32,320 --> 00:34:35,322 - 'Scuse me. 'Scuse me. 615 00:34:37,659 --> 00:34:41,204 - Who the fuck are you? - I'm Lonnie. 616 00:34:41,204 --> 00:34:42,371 The contractor, we talked on the phone. 617 00:34:42,371 --> 00:34:44,541 - Oh! 618 00:34:45,958 --> 00:34:47,543 Right on. 619 00:34:47,543 --> 00:34:48,878 - Uh, so meet the crew, 620 00:34:48,878 --> 00:34:50,255 uh, this is Vinny. 621 00:34:50,255 --> 00:34:51,672 - Electrical. - 'Sup? 622 00:34:51,672 --> 00:34:53,800 - Dennis, plumbing. - Right on. 623 00:34:53,800 --> 00:34:54,884 - Rand, carpentry. 624 00:34:54,884 --> 00:34:55,885 Nice to meet you, man. 625 00:34:55,885 --> 00:34:56,886 You too. 626 00:34:56,886 --> 00:34:58,555 Oh wow, cool tat. 627 00:34:58,555 --> 00:35:00,265 It's a pentacle. 628 00:35:00,265 --> 00:35:01,683 - Uh, pentagram. 629 00:35:01,683 --> 00:35:02,809 - That's a pentacle. 630 00:35:02,809 --> 00:35:04,144 Pentagram's any five-pointed star. 631 00:35:04,144 --> 00:35:06,104 The circle actually makes it a pentacle. 632 00:35:06,104 --> 00:35:08,231 You know, it's funny, most people associate the pentacle 633 00:35:08,231 --> 00:35:09,899 with Neo-Paganism and witchcraft, 634 00:35:09,899 --> 00:35:12,694 but it has its roots in ancient Hebrew scripture. 635 00:35:12,694 --> 00:35:14,904 The Israelites believe that the pentacle was 636 00:35:14,904 --> 00:35:16,573 the first of the Seven Seals. 637 00:35:16,573 --> 00:35:17,991 You know, the amulet that represents 638 00:35:17,991 --> 00:35:19,993 the seven secret names of God? 639 00:35:22,037 --> 00:35:23,747 - I just think it looks kinda badass. 640 00:35:25,582 --> 00:35:27,167 Anyway, we shouldn't be here for long, 641 00:35:27,167 --> 00:35:28,335 we just wanna do a quick walkthrough 642 00:35:28,335 --> 00:35:29,919 with the guys, you know, uh, 643 00:35:29,919 --> 00:35:31,212 go through your architect's plans. 644 00:35:31,212 --> 00:35:32,756 - Yeah, cool beans. 645 00:35:32,756 --> 00:35:33,965 You guys do your thing. 646 00:35:33,965 --> 00:35:35,508 If you need me, I'll be right upstairs. 647 00:35:35,508 --> 00:35:36,885 All right, hey. 648 00:35:36,885 --> 00:35:38,553 Oh! 649 00:35:38,553 --> 00:35:41,681 Yeah, there might be...some changes. 650 00:35:41,681 --> 00:35:42,724 - Changes? 651 00:35:42,724 --> 00:35:43,725 - Yeah, I'm gonna switch up 652 00:35:43,725 --> 00:35:44,726 the ol' concept a bit. 653 00:35:44,726 --> 00:35:47,270 No more bachelor pad 3000. 654 00:35:47,270 --> 00:35:48,563 New concept, 655 00:35:48,563 --> 00:35:49,731 love deluxe. 656 00:35:49,731 --> 00:35:52,776 - Love deluxe? - I got married! 657 00:35:52,776 --> 00:35:54,319 - You did? Who's the lucky lady? 658 00:35:54,319 --> 00:35:55,862 - Oh, man. - Oh. 659 00:35:55,862 --> 00:35:58,114 Hey, boys. 660 00:35:58,114 --> 00:36:00,158 Pamela fucking Anderson! 661 00:36:00,158 --> 00:36:02,952 Babe, stop! 662 00:36:02,952 --> 00:36:04,579 Stop it, babe, my Rice Krispies! 663 00:36:08,375 --> 00:36:10,001 - Have you decided yet? 664 00:36:10,001 --> 00:36:11,586 Mm! 665 00:36:11,586 --> 00:36:12,670 Hell yeah! 666 00:36:12,670 --> 00:36:13,922 - No, God, no! - Oh, yeah. 667 00:36:13,922 --> 00:36:14,923 - Tommy, no, Tommy, gimme! - Nope! 668 00:36:14,923 --> 00:36:16,174 Mm-mm. 669 00:36:16,174 --> 00:36:17,384 - Gimme that, please, - Come on! 670 00:36:17,384 --> 00:36:18,468 - God, no! - Hey! 671 00:36:18,468 --> 00:36:19,594 - No, no, no, no, no! 672 00:36:19,594 --> 00:36:21,596 - Come on! - No, God, stop. 673 00:36:21,596 --> 00:36:22,889 I can't watch myself. 674 00:36:22,889 --> 00:36:23,890 No. - Why? 675 00:36:23,890 --> 00:36:25,141 Why not? 676 00:36:25,141 --> 00:36:26,226 - What? 677 00:36:26,226 --> 00:36:27,435 I don't know, it's just-- 678 00:36:27,435 --> 00:36:29,521 I'm so much better in my head. 679 00:36:29,521 --> 00:36:30,980 I--I get self-conscious, I can't. 680 00:36:30,980 --> 00:36:33,441 - That's crazy. You literally-- 681 00:36:33,441 --> 00:36:34,818 look at you, you have nothing 682 00:36:34,818 --> 00:36:36,194 to be self-conscious about, 683 00:36:36,194 --> 00:36:38,321 especially not your...acting. 684 00:36:39,656 --> 00:36:40,865 You think I'm a good actor? 685 00:36:40,865 --> 00:36:43,159 Uh, totally. 686 00:36:43,159 --> 00:36:44,285 You can do anything. 687 00:36:44,285 --> 00:36:48,331 Drama, comedy, fuckin'...Shakespeare. 688 00:36:48,331 --> 00:36:50,375 Mm-hmm. 689 00:36:54,879 --> 00:36:57,465 Okay, well, how about that? 690 00:36:57,465 --> 00:36:59,676 - Totally. - Yeah? 691 00:36:59,676 --> 00:37:01,678 - 100%. - Oh, my God, I would love 692 00:37:01,678 --> 00:37:04,973 to fuck you in space. 693 00:37:06,141 --> 00:37:07,767 Oh, my God! 694 00:37:07,767 --> 00:37:10,395 Oh, my God, oh, my God, I haven't seen this in years! 695 00:37:12,522 --> 00:37:14,524 - The fuck is this? 696 00:37:14,524 --> 00:37:15,984 - You haven't seen "The King and I"? 697 00:37:15,984 --> 00:37:17,277 How? 698 00:37:17,277 --> 00:37:18,445 - I-- - Oh, my God, this is 699 00:37:18,445 --> 00:37:20,405 one of my all-time favorite movies. 700 00:37:20,405 --> 00:37:21,990 Eh. 701 00:37:24,033 --> 00:37:25,535 - Who's the chick? 702 00:37:25,535 --> 00:37:27,245 - The chick--that's Anna. 703 00:37:27,245 --> 00:37:29,622 That's Anna. That's Anna! 704 00:37:29,622 --> 00:37:30,623 - Okay. - She's--okay, so she 705 00:37:30,623 --> 00:37:31,624 was sent to Siam 706 00:37:31,624 --> 00:37:33,251 and she's--her job there 707 00:37:33,251 --> 00:37:35,795 is to teach English to the king's children. 708 00:37:35,795 --> 00:37:38,381 And...yeah. 709 00:37:38,381 --> 00:37:39,799 - How many fucking kids he got? 710 00:37:39,799 --> 00:37:41,593 A lot. 711 00:37:42,719 --> 00:37:45,430 - Dude needs to slap on a Jimmy hat. 712 00:37:48,725 --> 00:37:51,561 Oh, I can't wait to be a mom. 713 00:37:54,105 --> 00:37:56,274 - I can't wait to knock you up. 714 00:37:58,151 --> 00:38:02,405 - Oh, your tits pregnant, that's gonna be insane. 715 00:38:04,115 --> 00:38:05,700 - Have you got a big one? 716 00:38:05,700 --> 00:38:07,410 You know I do. 717 00:38:09,037 --> 00:38:10,788 - I mean family. 718 00:38:10,788 --> 00:38:13,500 - Oh, that. 719 00:38:13,500 --> 00:38:16,544 - Mm, do you have any...siblings? 720 00:38:17,921 --> 00:38:19,839 - One sister. - Thanks, baby. 721 00:38:22,175 --> 00:38:24,135 - Athena. - Is she older or younger? 722 00:38:24,135 --> 00:38:26,846 - Uh, two years younger. - Yeah, you close? 723 00:38:26,846 --> 00:38:28,389 - Extremely. Super. 724 00:38:28,389 --> 00:38:31,017 - Super? Does she have kids? 725 00:38:31,017 --> 00:38:33,561 - Two. Tobi and Miles. 726 00:38:33,561 --> 00:38:34,938 They're the fuckin' bomb. 727 00:38:34,938 --> 00:38:36,356 - Yeah? - Mm. 728 00:38:36,356 --> 00:38:38,399 Those two little maniacs, 729 00:38:38,399 --> 00:38:39,609 they crack my shit up. 730 00:38:39,609 --> 00:38:40,735 - How old are they? 731 00:38:40,735 --> 00:38:43,071 - Uh, Tobi is...four, 732 00:38:43,071 --> 00:38:44,113 and Miles is two. 733 00:38:44,113 --> 00:38:47,450 - They must love their Uncle Tommy. 734 00:38:47,450 --> 00:38:49,244 Dude, we go hard. 735 00:38:49,244 --> 00:38:50,453 - You think I'm a madman in the club, 736 00:38:50,453 --> 00:38:52,497 you should see me on a fucking teeter-totter. 737 00:38:57,418 --> 00:39:00,255 I fucking love you, Tommy Lee. 738 00:39:02,966 --> 00:39:04,634 Yes, I like you very much. 739 00:39:04,634 --> 00:39:06,594 Oh, my God. 740 00:39:06,594 --> 00:39:08,471 I love this bit. 741 00:39:08,471 --> 00:39:09,597 It's a very 742 00:39:09,597 --> 00:39:11,641 ancient saying. - "Ancient saying. 743 00:39:11,641 --> 00:39:14,060 "True and honest thought... 744 00:39:14,060 --> 00:39:17,230 "that if you become a teacher, 745 00:39:17,230 --> 00:39:20,149 by your pupils, you'll be taught." 746 00:39:37,333 --> 00:39:39,210 - Getting to know you. - "Getting to know you." 747 00:40:10,450 --> 00:40:11,784 Yeah! 748 00:40:11,784 --> 00:40:12,785 - So English. 749 00:40:12,785 --> 00:40:14,078 Yes! 750 00:40:18,750 --> 00:40:20,335 - Easy! 751 00:40:25,548 --> 00:40:27,050 - What to say. 752 00:40:54,911 --> 00:40:57,205 Getting to know you! 753 00:41:01,292 --> 00:41:03,962 I've discovered a whole new side of you. 754 00:41:07,840 --> 00:41:09,676 - I should've taped it. 755 00:41:10,927 --> 00:41:12,553 I could've blackmailed you for millions! 756 00:41:12,553 --> 00:41:14,097 - This better stay our little secret. 757 00:41:14,097 --> 00:41:15,390 - Tommy Lee, 758 00:41:15,390 --> 00:41:16,808 Motley Crue drummer, 759 00:41:16,808 --> 00:41:18,976 secret lover of musicals! 760 00:41:18,976 --> 00:41:20,103 - Don't you dare. 761 00:41:20,103 --> 00:41:21,312 - Oh, baby, I'm daring, 762 00:41:21,312 --> 00:41:22,480 you try me. 763 00:41:22,480 --> 00:41:24,107 You try me! - Oh, oh, I'll try you! 764 00:41:24,107 --> 00:41:25,650 That's right. I'll try you. 765 00:41:25,650 --> 00:41:26,693 Remember that. 766 00:41:26,693 --> 00:41:28,736 - Assume the position. 767 00:41:28,736 --> 00:41:29,904 - No! 768 00:41:29,904 --> 00:41:30,988 Come here, cave woman! 769 00:41:32,490 --> 00:41:33,491 Yeah! 770 00:41:33,491 --> 00:41:34,742 Oh, you're not gonna fly 771 00:41:34,742 --> 00:41:35,910 with this in your mouth! 772 00:41:35,910 --> 00:41:37,161 No, oh, my God! - No way! 773 00:41:37,161 --> 00:41:38,204 No way! 774 00:41:38,204 --> 00:41:39,455 Whoo! - All right, all right! 775 00:41:39,455 --> 00:41:40,957 All right, it'll be our little secret! 47682

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