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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:07,442 --> 00:00:08,617 ISAAC: Ooh, luggage. 2 00:00:08,660 --> 00:00:10,488 Do I detect a voyage of some kind? 3 00:00:10,532 --> 00:00:12,055 Nothing gets by you, man. 4 00:00:12,099 --> 00:00:13,317 Oh, we're going away for the weekend. 5 00:00:13,361 --> 00:00:15,276 Everything's been so crazy since moving here, 6 00:00:15,319 --> 00:00:17,017 but we finally got a second to breathe, 7 00:00:17,060 --> 00:00:19,019 so I'm going to Ohio 8 00:00:19,062 --> 00:00:20,716 to see if my dead mom is a ghost. 9 00:00:20,759 --> 00:00:22,500 Not exactly spring break in Ibiza. 10 00:00:22,544 --> 00:00:23,893 How did she die, if you don't mind me asking? 11 00:00:23,936 --> 00:00:25,155 SAMANTHA: Allergic reaction. 12 00:00:25,199 --> 00:00:27,157 She was at a restaurant and didn't realize 13 00:00:27,201 --> 00:00:28,550 the dish she ordered had shrimp in it. 14 00:00:28,593 --> 00:00:31,118 Ah. I had a pretty severe shellfish allergy myself, 15 00:00:31,161 --> 00:00:32,815 which is why I always carried an EpiPen. 16 00:00:32,858 --> 00:00:34,338 Of course, those don't protect you against everything. 17 00:00:34,382 --> 00:00:35,470 [chuckles] 18 00:00:35,513 --> 00:00:36,688 We're sorry about your mom, Sam. 19 00:00:36,732 --> 00:00:37,994 SAMANTHA: Thank you. 20 00:00:38,038 --> 00:00:40,301 It was six years ago. Honestly, I'm excited. 21 00:00:40,344 --> 00:00:42,042 I never got a chance to say goodbye, 22 00:00:42,085 --> 00:00:44,261 and now I might get to see her, so that's amazing. 23 00:00:44,305 --> 00:00:47,003 Okay, but remember to keep your wits about you 24 00:00:47,047 --> 00:00:48,178 amongst those buckeyes. 25 00:00:48,222 --> 00:00:50,354 Rutherford B. Hayes was from Ohio, so... 26 00:00:50,398 --> 00:00:51,442 You get it. 27 00:00:51,486 --> 00:00:53,314 Okay. I've got to pack. 28 00:00:53,357 --> 00:00:55,664 And just as a reminder, Sam, your mother might not be there. 29 00:00:55,707 --> 00:00:57,231 Not every spirit is lucky enough 30 00:00:57,274 --> 00:01:00,103 to be trapped in an - endless purgatory. - SAMANTHA: I know. 31 00:01:00,147 --> 00:01:01,800 But I just got to see, right? 32 00:01:01,844 --> 00:01:02,801 Well, we're all here to support you. 33 00:01:02,845 --> 00:01:03,846 Thank you. 34 00:01:03,889 --> 00:01:05,108 SASAPPIS: And also to remind you 35 00:01:05,152 --> 00:01:07,415 to leave the TV on when you go. 36 00:01:08,546 --> 00:01:09,895 Maybe write down the thing about leaving 37 00:01:09,939 --> 00:01:11,114 the TV on? 38 00:01:11,158 --> 00:01:12,333 Sam? 39 00:01:12,376 --> 00:01:14,378 ♪ 40 00:01:18,904 --> 00:01:20,080 Knock, knock. 41 00:01:20,123 --> 00:01:21,385 Uh, 42 00:01:21,429 --> 00:01:23,344 can I ask your advice on something before you go? 43 00:01:23,387 --> 00:01:24,736 Sure. Pete just came in. 44 00:01:24,780 --> 00:01:26,216 Hey, what up, Arrow Guy? 45 00:01:26,260 --> 00:01:28,784 So, you can probably tell I have a crush on Alberta, 46 00:01:28,827 --> 00:01:30,046 right? 47 00:01:30,090 --> 00:01:31,395 I think I want to say something to her. 48 00:01:31,439 --> 00:01:32,875 Wow. [chuckles softly] 49 00:01:32,918 --> 00:01:35,051 Pete has a crush on Alberta, and he wants to tell her. 50 00:01:35,095 --> 00:01:37,575 Okay, so we're looping Jay in - on this one. - JAY: Wait, 51 00:01:37,619 --> 00:01:38,924 hasn't he known her for decades? 52 00:01:38,968 --> 00:01:40,752 Why is he making the move now? Well, 53 00:01:40,796 --> 00:01:43,059 I'm a loyal guy, and my wife was still very much alive. 54 00:01:43,103 --> 00:01:45,279 But then you asked her to come visit the house, 55 00:01:45,322 --> 00:01:47,237 and I found out she was a dirty, lying cheater. 56 00:01:47,281 --> 00:01:49,718 So, long story short, I'm ready to move on. 57 00:01:49,761 --> 00:01:51,198 He's just ready to move on. 58 00:01:51,241 --> 00:01:53,548 Cool. Look, I got to take these down, 59 00:01:53,591 --> 00:01:56,377 but please catch me up in the car, okay? 60 00:01:56,420 --> 00:01:57,987 'Cause I actually kind of love this stuff. 61 00:01:58,030 --> 00:01:59,249 It's like watching Friends, 62 00:01:59,293 --> 00:02:01,033 except you can't see or hear Friends, 63 00:02:01,077 --> 00:02:02,470 and you only have one person 64 00:02:02,513 --> 00:02:04,341 to tell you what it's about. 65 00:02:04,385 --> 00:02:05,908 So, wh-what do you think? 66 00:02:05,951 --> 00:02:08,258 I love that you came to me, 67 00:02:08,302 --> 00:02:09,999 but I have one foot out the door right now. 68 00:02:10,042 --> 00:02:11,783 Just tell me what to do. Sh-Should I say something? 69 00:02:11,827 --> 00:02:13,698 Pete, you're a sweet guy. 70 00:02:13,742 --> 00:02:16,179 But I've only heard her talk about dating bootleggers 71 00:02:16,223 --> 00:02:17,354 or mob bosses. 72 00:02:17,398 --> 00:02:18,747 Oh, you don't think I'm a bad boy? 73 00:02:18,790 --> 00:02:21,097 You know, I ripped the tag off a mattress one time. 74 00:02:21,141 --> 00:02:22,794 That's a federal offense, baby. 75 00:02:22,838 --> 00:02:25,319 I just would hate to see you get hurt, 76 00:02:25,362 --> 00:02:28,191 and if, for any reason, things went poorly, 77 00:02:28,235 --> 00:02:30,889 - it could be awkward. - Right. 78 00:02:30,933 --> 00:02:32,848 - Like, for everyone. - Sure. 79 00:02:32,891 --> 00:02:34,371 - For all eternity. - Yeah. 80 00:02:34,415 --> 00:02:35,677 Feels like you're kind of harping on it now. 81 00:02:39,985 --> 00:02:42,249 Oh. Hey, the TV, Sam? 82 00:02:42,292 --> 00:02:43,728 - One last reminder? - Yeah. 83 00:02:43,772 --> 00:02:46,731 Wow. Can't believe Pete is gonna tell Alberta 84 00:02:46,775 --> 00:02:49,038 - he's got a crush on her. - What now? 85 00:02:49,081 --> 00:02:50,213 Uh...[Jay exhales] 86 00:02:50,257 --> 00:02:52,215 I'm rooting for Arrow Guy. 87 00:02:52,259 --> 00:02:53,477 Please don't say anything. 88 00:02:53,521 --> 00:02:55,349 I think I talked him out of it, anyway. 89 00:02:55,392 --> 00:02:57,307 What if I really want to say something, though? 90 00:02:57,351 --> 00:02:58,482 Please don't. 91 00:02:58,526 --> 00:02:59,788 [car door closes] JAY: Let's go, babe! 92 00:02:59,831 --> 00:03:02,530 [engine starts][car door closes] 93 00:03:02,573 --> 00:03:04,227 Seriously, Sass. 94 00:03:04,271 --> 00:03:07,274 I promise I'll try not to say anything! 95 00:03:07,317 --> 00:03:10,190 But this is a tasty morsel! 96 00:03:12,279 --> 00:03:14,237 [chuckles softly] 97 00:03:15,282 --> 00:03:17,806 JAY: Are you ready? How you feeling? 98 00:03:17,849 --> 00:03:19,938 Nervous. I haven't seen her in six years. 99 00:03:19,982 --> 00:03:21,984 And I know it sounds dumb, but I just... 100 00:03:22,027 --> 00:03:23,681 I kind of want her to be proud of me. 101 00:03:23,725 --> 00:03:25,074 That doesn't sound dumb at all. 102 00:03:25,117 --> 00:03:26,554 Well, of course you don't think so. 103 00:03:26,597 --> 00:03:27,859 You still call your mom when you finish your crossword. 104 00:03:27,903 --> 00:03:30,253 It was a Saturday one, and I did it in ink. 105 00:03:30,297 --> 00:03:31,776 But the last time I saw my mom 106 00:03:31,820 --> 00:03:33,517 was when I'd gone home for Thanksgiving. 107 00:03:33,561 --> 00:03:35,780 We got into this huge fight because she told me 108 00:03:35,824 --> 00:03:37,913 I should give up journalism and apply to law school. 109 00:03:37,956 --> 00:03:40,263 Yeah, but what did you do? You stuck with it. 110 00:03:40,307 --> 00:03:42,178 Well, I'm doing fine, but it's not like I'm writing 111 00:03:42,222 --> 00:03:43,788 for The New York Times or anything. 112 00:03:43,832 --> 00:03:45,355 Babe, you're doing amazing. 113 00:03:45,399 --> 00:03:46,661 And it's not just the writing. 114 00:03:46,704 --> 00:03:48,445 You nabbed yourself a good hubs. 115 00:03:48,489 --> 00:03:50,055 We're starting this B and B. 116 00:03:50,099 --> 00:03:54,103 And you're possibly the only person on the planet who can 117 00:03:54,146 --> 00:03:55,713 see ghosts. 118 00:03:55,757 --> 00:03:57,237 [chuckles]: You're practically a superhero. 119 00:03:57,280 --> 00:04:01,371 I guess I am - kind of a superhero, right? - Uh-huh. 120 00:04:01,415 --> 00:04:03,025 And that means I'm doing it with a superhero, 121 00:04:03,068 --> 00:04:05,157 which, as you know, is, like, a big dream of mine. 122 00:04:05,201 --> 00:04:07,029 That took a really weird turn. 123 00:04:07,072 --> 00:04:09,423 Yeah, you're not wrong. But it's still hot. 124 00:04:09,466 --> 00:04:12,208 Troops, we have a situation. 125 00:04:12,252 --> 00:04:14,558 It seems that Samantha remembered to leave the TV on, 126 00:04:14,602 --> 00:04:16,691 but by some cruel twist of fate, 127 00:04:16,734 --> 00:04:18,997 it has turned off by itself. 128 00:04:19,041 --> 00:04:21,478 Sleep mode. 129 00:04:21,522 --> 00:04:23,001 I'm sorry, what? 130 00:04:23,045 --> 00:04:24,960 If no one press button for six hours, 131 00:04:25,003 --> 00:04:26,875 TV go asleep. 132 00:04:26,918 --> 00:04:28,311 Well, can't you turn it on, Trevor? 133 00:04:28,355 --> 00:04:30,444 Jay put the remote away.[clicks tongue] 134 00:04:30,487 --> 00:04:33,185 I mean, a button I can do, but a handle on a drawer? 135 00:04:33,229 --> 00:04:34,448 I-I'm only human. 136 00:04:34,491 --> 00:04:36,058 Or whatever this is. 137 00:04:36,101 --> 00:04:37,712 But what are we supposed to do for entertainment? 138 00:04:37,755 --> 00:04:39,322 She'll be gone for days. 139 00:04:39,366 --> 00:04:40,758 PETE: Guys, guys, come on. 140 00:04:40,802 --> 00:04:43,065 Before Jay and Sam, we used to entertain ourselves, 141 00:04:43,108 --> 00:04:45,459 remember? Food Club, Movie Club. 142 00:04:45,502 --> 00:04:46,808 We'd talk for hours. 143 00:04:46,851 --> 00:04:48,418 Who wants to hear me describe Meatballs? 144 00:04:48,462 --> 00:04:50,594 Now, fun fact: that's actually a food 145 00:04:50,638 --> 00:04:52,640 - and a movie. - This is hell. I'm in hell. 146 00:04:52,683 --> 00:04:54,032 The movie stars Bill Murray 147 00:04:54,076 --> 00:04:56,426 as a fun-loving, wisecracking counselor 148 00:04:56,470 --> 00:04:58,167 at a summer camp. And the food... 149 00:04:58,210 --> 00:04:59,473 well, you guys know what the food is. 150 00:04:59,516 --> 00:05:00,604 Pretty self-explanatory. 151 00:05:00,648 --> 00:05:02,084 But we got the time, so I'll explain it. 152 00:05:02,127 --> 00:05:04,216 Pete's planning on telling Alberta that he likes her. 153 00:05:04,260 --> 00:05:06,001 - What? - What? 154 00:05:06,044 --> 00:05:07,916 I'm sorry, Pete. But I overheard Jay, 155 00:05:07,959 --> 00:05:09,004 and I didn't want to say anything, 156 00:05:09,047 --> 00:05:10,658 and then the TV shut off, 157 00:05:10,701 --> 00:05:12,442 and then you forced my hand with this whole meatballs lecture. 158 00:05:12,486 --> 00:05:13,965 I...Maybe we should go talk about this 159 00:05:14,009 --> 00:05:15,140 in the other room, Pete. 160 00:05:15,184 --> 00:05:17,404 Although if it's good news for Pete, 161 00:05:17,447 --> 00:05:21,451 perhaps we should all be a part of it to celebrate together. 162 00:05:23,366 --> 00:05:25,934 - Yeah, maybe the other room? - Oy. 163 00:05:25,977 --> 00:05:26,935 Uh-oh.[Flower groans] 164 00:05:26,978 --> 00:05:28,589 Maybe you heard Jay wrong, Sass. 165 00:05:28,632 --> 00:05:30,068 I mean, I don't think so. 166 00:05:30,112 --> 00:05:31,374 Or maybe Jay was a little mixed-up. 167 00:05:31,418 --> 00:05:32,549 You know how you say one thing to Sam, 168 00:05:32,593 --> 00:05:33,550 she repeats it to Jay, 169 00:05:33,594 --> 00:05:35,117 and then it's the telephone game. 170 00:05:35,160 --> 00:05:36,901 Well, what did you say to Sam? 171 00:05:36,945 --> 00:05:40,078 Well, I did tell her that I had feelings for someone, 172 00:05:40,122 --> 00:05:42,385 but that someone was... 173 00:05:42,429 --> 00:05:45,170 my girlfriend.[Hetty gasps] 174 00:05:45,214 --> 00:05:46,389 ALBERTA: Oh! 175 00:05:46,433 --> 00:05:48,086 Girlfriend? What, you got a girlfriend? 176 00:05:48,130 --> 00:05:50,393 One of you mating with Pete? 177 00:05:50,437 --> 00:05:52,047 I don't think so.[chuckles]: Certainly not. 178 00:05:52,090 --> 00:05:54,049 Well, a-actually, I don't... I don't think you guys know her. 179 00:05:54,092 --> 00:05:55,529 How would we not know her? 180 00:05:55,572 --> 00:05:58,836 Because she... lives downstairs. 181 00:05:58,880 --> 00:06:00,360 In the cholera pit? 182 00:06:00,403 --> 00:06:01,578 Uh, yeah. 183 00:06:01,622 --> 00:06:02,840 The cholera pit. 184 00:06:02,884 --> 00:06:05,626 Well, I, for one, would love to meet her. 185 00:06:05,669 --> 00:06:06,757 Well, I'll go 186 00:06:06,801 --> 00:06:08,019 talk to her about it right now. 187 00:06:08,063 --> 00:06:11,240 Downstairs, where she definitely lives. 188 00:06:11,283 --> 00:06:13,677 Here I go. 189 00:06:13,721 --> 00:06:15,679 Be back with my girlfriend. 190 00:06:15,723 --> 00:06:17,942 Oh, God. 191 00:06:19,640 --> 00:06:23,383 Okay, mojitos are Cuban, this menu is Mexican, 192 00:06:23,426 --> 00:06:25,515 and then the cheeseburger on the wall's playing a ukulele, 193 00:06:25,559 --> 00:06:28,692 which is definitely Hawaiian. This place is all over the map. 194 00:06:28,736 --> 00:06:30,825 Welcome to Mojitown. I'm Dennis. 195 00:06:30,868 --> 00:06:32,479 Will it be two for lunch? 196 00:06:32,522 --> 00:06:34,655 - Yes, thank you. - I still don't see her. 197 00:06:34,698 --> 00:06:36,265 - Who? - Oh, uh, 198 00:06:36,308 --> 00:06:37,614 my mom. She's meeting us here. 199 00:06:37,658 --> 00:06:39,660 - So it'll be three for lunch. - No, no, 200 00:06:39,703 --> 00:06:41,401 'cause she's probably - not eating with us. - I'm sorry, 201 00:06:41,444 --> 00:06:42,880 I'm confused. 202 00:06:43,925 --> 00:06:45,970 Holy crap, Samantha? 203 00:06:46,014 --> 00:06:47,363 Mom? 204 00:06:47,407 --> 00:06:48,408 "Mom"? 205 00:06:48,451 --> 00:06:49,757 You can see me? 206 00:06:49,800 --> 00:06:51,976 - Oh, my God. - Oh, my God! 207 00:06:52,020 --> 00:06:53,108 Oh, my God! 208 00:06:54,457 --> 00:06:55,719 She loves 209 00:06:55,763 --> 00:06:58,983 Cuban-themed Mexican Hawaiian restaurants. 210 00:06:59,027 --> 00:07:00,985 They're so hard to find.[gasps, squeals] 211 00:07:05,903 --> 00:07:08,340 "Come join us at Mojitown," my coworkers said. 212 00:07:08,384 --> 00:07:10,647 "One lunch won't kill you." Oh, yeah? 213 00:07:10,691 --> 00:07:13,476 Well, are there at least other ghosts for you to talk to? 214 00:07:13,520 --> 00:07:15,739 [sighs] Yeah, a couple. There's Sondra. 215 00:07:15,783 --> 00:07:17,045 JAY: Ooh, 216 00:07:17,088 --> 00:07:18,481 what's a cheese hurricane? 217 00:07:18,525 --> 00:07:20,178 It's what made my heart explode. 218 00:07:20,222 --> 00:07:21,658 Might have to get that. 219 00:07:21,702 --> 00:07:24,748 - Oh. - SHERYL: And, of course, there's Peggy Sue. She was 220 00:07:24,792 --> 00:07:27,359 a carhop when this place was a drive-in diner in the '50s. 221 00:07:27,403 --> 00:07:30,188 Roller skates and tail fins, not a great combo. 222 00:07:30,232 --> 00:07:31,929 SHERYL: So, 223 00:07:31,973 --> 00:07:33,322 how did this happen? 224 00:07:33,365 --> 00:07:34,628 You said that one of the ghosts 225 00:07:34,671 --> 00:07:36,499 from the mansion pushed you down the stairs? 226 00:07:36,543 --> 00:07:39,981 Oh, no, no. Uh, he has a power where he can touch things, 227 00:07:40,024 --> 00:07:41,809 and he knocked over a vase. I tripped. 228 00:07:41,852 --> 00:07:43,767 - It was a total accident. - He doesn't wear pants. 229 00:07:43,811 --> 00:07:45,247 He can touch things? 230 00:07:45,290 --> 00:07:46,640 My ghost power sucks. 231 00:07:46,683 --> 00:07:47,728 What's your ghost power? 232 00:07:47,771 --> 00:07:49,164 I can burp up shrimp breath. 233 00:07:51,035 --> 00:07:52,472 [exhales] 234 00:07:52,515 --> 00:07:53,951 [gags] 235 00:07:53,995 --> 00:07:55,518 What the hell was that? 236 00:07:55,562 --> 00:07:57,041 My late mother. 237 00:07:57,085 --> 00:08:00,305 Okay, so, you're doing the B and B. 238 00:08:00,349 --> 00:08:01,437 I guess that means it didn't work out 239 00:08:01,481 --> 00:08:02,960 with the whole journalism thing. 240 00:08:03,004 --> 00:08:05,920 No, it worked out. I'm just... I'm also doing the B and B 241 00:08:05,963 --> 00:08:07,835 in addition to the journalism thing. 242 00:08:07,878 --> 00:08:10,533 Sam had a big article published 243 00:08:10,577 --> 00:08:12,448 in the Ulster County Review. 244 00:08:12,492 --> 00:08:14,145 Oh, that's nice. 245 00:08:14,189 --> 00:08:17,235 - So, you're on staff there? - No, I am freelance. 246 00:08:17,279 --> 00:08:18,759 Oh. 247 00:08:18,802 --> 00:08:21,370 Yeah. But then this guy 248 00:08:21,413 --> 00:08:23,024 who works at The New York Times read it, 249 00:08:23,067 --> 00:08:26,244 - and he asked me to work there. - What? 250 00:08:26,288 --> 00:08:27,419 - Huh? - SAMANTHA: Yes. 251 00:08:27,463 --> 00:08:28,812 So, that is your daughter. 252 00:08:28,856 --> 00:08:31,336 Full-time at the paper of record. 253 00:08:31,380 --> 00:08:32,686 [chuckles]: This is incredible. 254 00:08:32,729 --> 00:08:34,209 I mean, 255 00:08:34,252 --> 00:08:36,080 a staff writer at The New York Times. 256 00:08:36,124 --> 00:08:37,473 Well, I guess 257 00:08:37,517 --> 00:08:39,040 you're going to have to give up the B and B, then. 258 00:08:39,083 --> 00:08:42,565 No, I can still work remotely. Send in articles. 259 00:08:42,609 --> 00:08:44,480 Wait, but you're never gonna make it to editor 260 00:08:44,524 --> 00:08:47,048 if you just send in the articles. 261 00:08:47,091 --> 00:08:49,137 - Here we go. - No, I'm just saying 262 00:08:49,180 --> 00:08:50,921 that that's where all the networking happens, right? 263 00:08:50,965 --> 00:08:52,923 Not even my lies are good enough for you. 264 00:08:52,967 --> 00:08:55,883 - Your lies? - Yes. I don't work for The New York Times. 265 00:08:55,926 --> 00:08:57,493 I just said that because I wanted you 266 00:08:57,537 --> 00:08:59,321 to admit you were wrong about the whole journalism thing. 267 00:08:59,364 --> 00:09:01,410 But apparently nothing I ever do 268 00:09:01,453 --> 00:09:02,759 will be good enough for you, Mom. 269 00:09:02,803 --> 00:09:04,456 Uh, she calls me Mom. 270 00:09:04,500 --> 00:09:07,068 It's like "bro." It's a TikTok thing. 271 00:09:07,111 --> 00:09:09,070 Bye, Mom. 272 00:09:09,113 --> 00:09:10,854 PETE: Hey, everyone. 273 00:09:10,898 --> 00:09:13,074 This won't take up too much of your time. 274 00:09:13,117 --> 00:09:15,946 Hi. Uh, I'm in kind of a bind 275 00:09:15,990 --> 00:09:18,340 and need a volunteer to be my fake girlfriend. 276 00:09:18,383 --> 00:09:19,602 Why do you need that? 277 00:09:19,646 --> 00:09:20,864 Well, I made up this little white lie 278 00:09:20,908 --> 00:09:22,387 about how I have a girlfriend, 279 00:09:22,431 --> 00:09:24,694 and now I need to prove to everyone that that's true. 280 00:09:24,738 --> 00:09:25,739 You're talking to the wrong people. 281 00:09:25,782 --> 00:09:27,958 We don't like it upstairs. 282 00:09:28,002 --> 00:09:30,787 Yeah. You guys are mean and rude. 283 00:09:30,831 --> 00:09:33,355 Also, it's too bright and airy. 284 00:09:33,398 --> 00:09:36,924 Okay. Uh, well, sorry to bother you. 285 00:09:36,967 --> 00:09:38,665 I'll do it. 286 00:09:38,708 --> 00:09:40,405 - PETE: - Really? 287 00:09:40,449 --> 00:09:41,711 You will? 288 00:09:41,755 --> 00:09:45,367 Nancy, we don't go up there. We stay with our kind. 289 00:09:45,410 --> 00:09:47,151 I am not your kind. 290 00:09:47,195 --> 00:09:50,198 I want a better afterlife than this. 291 00:09:50,241 --> 00:09:52,243 All you guys do 292 00:09:52,287 --> 00:09:54,637 is stand around, talking about the water heater. 293 00:09:54,681 --> 00:09:55,986 It's boring. 294 00:09:56,030 --> 00:09:57,727 Okay, calm down. 295 00:09:57,771 --> 00:10:01,601 Oh, no, do not tell me to calm down. 296 00:10:01,644 --> 00:10:03,211 You gave me cholera, 297 00:10:03,254 --> 00:10:04,473 Stuart. 298 00:10:04,516 --> 00:10:05,692 Okay, well, Nancy 299 00:10:05,735 --> 00:10:07,128 has thrown her hat in the ring, 300 00:10:07,171 --> 00:10:08,782 which is... great, 301 00:10:08,825 --> 00:10:11,567 but I want to, you know, be fair to all of the ladies of the pit, 302 00:10:11,611 --> 00:10:13,351 so, uh, how about the quiet one 303 00:10:13,395 --> 00:10:15,310 in the back there? With the smile? 304 00:10:15,353 --> 00:10:18,182 Oh. Yeah, she doesn't have a tongue. 305 00:10:18,226 --> 00:10:20,097 And let me tell you, that is 306 00:10:20,141 --> 00:10:21,229 her "no" face. 307 00:10:21,272 --> 00:10:23,884 Now, listen up. I will help you out. 308 00:10:23,927 --> 00:10:25,276 But just to be clear, 309 00:10:25,320 --> 00:10:28,584 there is nothing happening here sexually. 310 00:10:28,628 --> 00:10:30,891 O-Okay. Noted. 311 00:10:30,934 --> 00:10:34,416 All right. - Let's do this, then, huh? - PETE: Okay. 312 00:10:34,459 --> 00:10:35,765 Oh. 313 00:10:35,809 --> 00:10:37,854 I didn't know - ghosts could sweat. - Oh, no, 314 00:10:37,898 --> 00:10:39,203 it's pus from an infected wound. 315 00:10:39,247 --> 00:10:41,815 Ah. That explains it. 316 00:10:41,858 --> 00:10:44,165 Okay, Sheryl, now that it's just us... 317 00:10:44,208 --> 00:10:45,775 I think. Are you still there? 318 00:10:45,819 --> 00:10:48,735 [grunts, exhales] 319 00:10:48,778 --> 00:10:51,085 Oh, that is... 320 00:10:51,128 --> 00:10:52,695 actually really smart. 321 00:10:52,739 --> 00:10:54,784 Super gross, but I get it. 322 00:10:54,828 --> 00:10:57,091 You are there. Hi. Okay, 323 00:10:57,134 --> 00:10:58,266 here's my thought. 324 00:10:58,309 --> 00:11:00,050 Can you please just admit to Sam 325 00:11:00,094 --> 00:11:02,966 that sometimes you might be a little too critical? 326 00:11:03,010 --> 00:11:05,403 - Can you believe this? - It's always our fault. 327 00:11:05,447 --> 00:11:07,797 I mean, she traveled all this way to see you. 328 00:11:07,841 --> 00:11:10,365 The least you could do is meet her halfway. 329 00:11:10,408 --> 00:11:13,716 Because she got a point, all right? I mean, I love you, 330 00:11:13,760 --> 00:11:15,762 but let's be honest, you can be really tough. 331 00:11:15,805 --> 00:11:17,111 DENNIS: One cheese hurricane. 332 00:11:17,154 --> 00:11:19,069 Yes! 333 00:11:19,113 --> 00:11:22,594 I highly advise you not to eat it all yourself. 334 00:11:22,638 --> 00:11:24,161 Well, you don't know me. 335 00:11:24,205 --> 00:11:25,206 I'm not too critical. 336 00:11:25,249 --> 00:11:27,469 I just know what she's capable of. 337 00:11:27,512 --> 00:11:30,037 I still think you should do what this guy is saying. 338 00:11:30,080 --> 00:11:32,604 Remember when Harold finally forgave his brother 339 00:11:32,648 --> 00:11:35,738 for running off with his wife? Whoosh. Up he went. 340 00:11:35,782 --> 00:11:37,174 So, you're saying 341 00:11:37,218 --> 00:11:39,786 if I have some kind of a breakthrough with my daughter, 342 00:11:39,829 --> 00:11:42,702 I could finally get out of this hellhole. 343 00:11:42,745 --> 00:11:45,139 So, what do we think, Sheryl? 344 00:11:45,182 --> 00:11:47,184 If you agree, just, you know... 345 00:11:47,228 --> 00:11:49,273 Actually, you know what, no shrimp breath this time. 346 00:11:49,317 --> 00:11:51,319 Let's just see what happens. 347 00:11:52,886 --> 00:11:55,845 So, there were a lot of rumors going around today 348 00:11:55,889 --> 00:11:57,368 about how I didn't have a girlfriend 349 00:11:57,412 --> 00:12:00,023 and about how maybe I just made that up in a blind, 350 00:12:00,067 --> 00:12:02,852 sweaty panic. But here she is in the flesh. 351 00:12:02,896 --> 00:12:04,898 - The rotting flesh. - Shh. 352 00:12:04,941 --> 00:12:06,769 Nancy from the cholera pit. 353 00:12:06,813 --> 00:12:09,903 [chuckles]: Yeah. Well, originally from Albany. 354 00:12:09,946 --> 00:12:13,297 Uh, but then I got sick, and they threw me in the pest house, 355 00:12:13,341 --> 00:12:15,473 which they told us was some sort 356 00:12:15,517 --> 00:12:16,779 of recovery ward. 357 00:12:16,823 --> 00:12:18,955 [chuckles] But then they nailed the door shut. 358 00:12:18,999 --> 00:12:20,696 That was not a good sign. 359 00:12:20,740 --> 00:12:23,394 - How did you two meet? - PETE: Uh, well, 360 00:12:23,438 --> 00:12:25,005 that's a fun story. Um... Yeah. 361 00:12:25,048 --> 00:12:27,485 He came downstairs trolling for sex. 362 00:12:27,529 --> 00:12:29,183 PETE: [chuckles] Okay.[Nancy laughs] 363 00:12:29,226 --> 00:12:31,533 She's a joker. [chuckles] Loves to tell jokes. 364 00:12:31,576 --> 00:12:33,622 It's actually one of the things I like about her. 365 00:12:33,665 --> 00:12:36,016 What are some of the other things? 366 00:12:36,059 --> 00:12:38,975 Uh, well, our shared love of... 367 00:12:39,019 --> 00:12:41,717 - The water heater. - Right. 368 00:12:41,761 --> 00:12:43,675 Pete, you love the water heater? 369 00:12:43,719 --> 00:12:46,722 Yeah. [chuckles] Oh, he-he loves the water heater. 370 00:12:46,766 --> 00:12:49,203 - Oh, won't shut up about it. - He could go on for hours 371 00:12:49,246 --> 00:12:52,032 talking calibration 372 00:12:52,075 --> 00:12:53,642 - and combustion. - Combustion. 373 00:12:53,685 --> 00:12:57,124 - And, uh, corrosion. - Uh, corrosion. 374 00:12:57,167 --> 00:12:58,473 - And deliming. - And... deliming. 375 00:12:58,516 --> 00:13:01,128 I love deliming. Yeah. 376 00:13:01,171 --> 00:13:03,304 [burps] Oh. Yowza. 377 00:13:03,347 --> 00:13:06,176 [exhales] Hey, hon. Is your mom still here? 378 00:13:06,220 --> 00:13:08,135 'Cause I'm sort of hoping she didn't just sit there 379 00:13:08,178 --> 00:13:11,486 and watch me eat an entire - appetizer platter for six. - It was horrifying. 380 00:13:11,529 --> 00:13:13,749 She's here. Hi, Mom. 381 00:13:13,793 --> 00:13:17,057 Sam, I thought a lot about what you said, 382 00:13:17,100 --> 00:13:19,407 and you're right. 383 00:13:19,450 --> 00:13:21,409 - Sometimes I can be too critical. - I'm sorry. Look, 384 00:13:21,452 --> 00:13:23,585 th-there's still some crust over here if you... Shh, shh. 385 00:13:23,628 --> 00:13:25,152 She's talking. Go on, Mom. 386 00:13:25,195 --> 00:13:27,458 It's just... [exhales] 387 00:13:27,502 --> 00:13:30,766 I butt in when I'm not needed, 388 00:13:30,810 --> 00:13:33,943 and for that, I'm sorry. 389 00:13:33,987 --> 00:13:35,684 And you're not too sensitive. 390 00:13:35,727 --> 00:13:37,904 I shouldn't have said that. 391 00:13:37,947 --> 00:13:39,340 Nope. 392 00:13:39,383 --> 00:13:41,995 This is completely on me. 393 00:13:42,038 --> 00:13:44,998 Wow, Mom. Thank you. 394 00:13:45,041 --> 00:13:47,261 Is this a cathartic mother-daughter resolution vibe 395 00:13:47,304 --> 00:13:48,305 that I'm getting? 396 00:13:50,177 --> 00:13:53,006 Could you find it in your heart to forgive me? 397 00:13:53,049 --> 00:13:55,182 Of course. 398 00:14:01,231 --> 00:14:03,364 Maybe you could just say 399 00:14:03,407 --> 00:14:05,279 you forgive me? You know, like, 400 00:14:05,322 --> 00:14:07,020 actually use the words? 401 00:14:07,063 --> 00:14:09,936 Okay. I forgive you. 402 00:14:09,979 --> 00:14:11,938 Okay. 403 00:14:11,981 --> 00:14:14,854 Maybe louder this time. And say my full name. 404 00:14:14,897 --> 00:14:16,812 Wait, you're just trying to ascend, aren't you? 405 00:14:16,856 --> 00:14:19,510 You didn't mean anything you just said. 406 00:14:19,554 --> 00:14:22,818 - What's happening? - I can't believe you would say all of those things 407 00:14:22,862 --> 00:14:24,341 just to get sucked off. 408 00:14:26,387 --> 00:14:28,389 Busted. I'm a dirty, dirty dog. 409 00:14:32,915 --> 00:14:35,483 - I'm so annoyed. - I'm sorry she did that. 410 00:14:35,526 --> 00:14:37,137 I mean, I really believed her for a second. 411 00:14:37,180 --> 00:14:39,704 I'm such an idiot. She's never gonna change. 412 00:14:39,748 --> 00:14:43,404 Look, not all moms can be Champa Arondekar, okay? 413 00:14:43,447 --> 00:14:46,015 But to be honest, she probably praises me too much. 414 00:14:46,059 --> 00:14:47,756 - You love it. - Yeah, you're right. I love it. 415 00:14:47,799 --> 00:14:49,932 It's so great. But that doesn't mean 416 00:14:49,976 --> 00:14:51,716 that your mom doesn't love you in her own way. 417 00:14:51,760 --> 00:14:54,850 I mean, here I have this ridiculous second chance 418 00:14:54,894 --> 00:14:56,417 that nobody in the world ever gets, 419 00:14:56,460 --> 00:14:58,027 and instead of taking advantage of it, 420 00:14:58,071 --> 00:14:59,463 I'm in another fight with her. 421 00:14:59,507 --> 00:15:02,031 I mean, it's just like the last time we saw each other. 422 00:15:02,075 --> 00:15:03,641 So then don't let it be. Okay? 423 00:15:03,685 --> 00:15:06,253 Yes, your mother is never gonna change, but you can. 424 00:15:06,296 --> 00:15:07,776 So don't be the girl who gets in a fight 425 00:15:07,819 --> 00:15:09,386 and then goes back to New York angry. 426 00:15:09,430 --> 00:15:12,085 Be the girl who goes back inside and talks to her mom 427 00:15:12,128 --> 00:15:13,825 while she still can. 428 00:15:13,869 --> 00:15:16,045 That's actually really good advice. 429 00:15:16,089 --> 00:15:18,265 Really? Do you mind if I call my mom real quick 430 00:15:18,308 --> 00:15:20,049 and tell her that I fixed this whole sitch? 431 00:15:20,093 --> 00:15:21,921 You two have - a real problem. - Okay, fine. 432 00:15:21,964 --> 00:15:23,966 I'll call her later. It's not a big deal. 433 00:15:24,010 --> 00:15:25,402 I have a special ring. Did you know that? 434 00:15:25,446 --> 00:15:27,056 So, like, she'll always pick up. 435 00:15:27,100 --> 00:15:28,405 PETE: So, uh, 436 00:15:28,449 --> 00:15:29,754 we should probably get going back down. 437 00:15:29,798 --> 00:15:31,060 Glad you guys got to meet my real girlfriend. 438 00:15:31,104 --> 00:15:32,540 [chuckles] Now it's time to head downstairs. 439 00:15:32,583 --> 00:15:33,715 - What? No. - No. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. 440 00:15:33,758 --> 00:15:34,890 Pete, Pete, come on. 441 00:15:34,934 --> 00:15:36,065 She just got here. 442 00:15:36,109 --> 00:15:37,893 Yeah, we don't even know how long you date 443 00:15:37,937 --> 00:15:40,983 - or how far she throw axe. - NANCY: Actually, 444 00:15:41,027 --> 00:15:43,594 yeah, I thought I might just maybe stay up here. 445 00:15:43,638 --> 00:15:45,509 [chuckles] What's that? 446 00:15:45,553 --> 00:15:47,120 NANCY: I mean, we might as well 447 00:15:47,163 --> 00:15:49,600 stop sneaking around, right, baby? 448 00:15:49,644 --> 00:15:52,647 Well, we're not - sneaking around. - I spend every night 449 00:15:52,690 --> 00:15:54,431 in Pete's room. 450 00:15:54,475 --> 00:15:56,912 There. It's out there in the open. 451 00:15:56,956 --> 00:15:59,045 I feel relieved - everyone can know. - Yeah, I feel great, too. 452 00:15:59,088 --> 00:16:00,655 I feel great. - I feel great, too. What? What? - Yeah. 453 00:16:00,698 --> 00:16:03,049 - What are you doing? - I'm not ready to go back yet. 454 00:16:03,092 --> 00:16:05,529 I think I might stay for a while. 455 00:16:05,573 --> 00:16:08,706 Aw, look, they're whispering sweet nothings. 456 00:16:08,750 --> 00:16:11,013 You better get used to me. 457 00:16:11,057 --> 00:16:13,407 [laughs][chuckles] 458 00:16:13,450 --> 00:16:14,712 This guy, right? 459 00:16:14,756 --> 00:16:16,410 Isn't he just the best?[chuckles] 460 00:16:16,453 --> 00:16:17,498 Ooh![grunts] 461 00:16:17,541 --> 00:16:18,716 Isn't he just the best? 462 00:16:18,760 --> 00:16:19,935 Isn't he just the best?[grunts, chuckles] 463 00:16:19,979 --> 00:16:21,067 Oh, yeah. Do that again. 464 00:16:21,110 --> 00:16:22,459 PETE: Stop it. You... Aah! 465 00:16:22,503 --> 00:16:24,940 [chuckles] Okay.[coughs] 466 00:16:26,376 --> 00:16:28,683 You looking for your mom? 467 00:16:28,726 --> 00:16:29,858 Yeah. 468 00:16:29,901 --> 00:16:31,077 She brags about you all the time, 469 00:16:31,120 --> 00:16:32,252 you know. Your mom. 470 00:16:32,295 --> 00:16:33,427 She does? 471 00:16:33,470 --> 00:16:35,559 Oh, yeah. Samantha this, Samantha that. 472 00:16:35,603 --> 00:16:37,039 "She went to Northwestern. 473 00:16:37,083 --> 00:16:39,128 "She moved to New York. She's so beautiful 474 00:16:39,172 --> 00:16:41,391 "and smart and doesn't talk 475 00:16:41,435 --> 00:16:43,480 all the time like you, Peggy Sue." 476 00:16:43,524 --> 00:16:46,048 [chuckles] The last part's a bit hurtful. 477 00:16:46,092 --> 00:16:48,050 I didn't know she felt like that about me. 478 00:16:48,094 --> 00:16:49,530 Of course I do. 479 00:16:51,053 --> 00:16:53,969 I just want you to have everything you've ever wanted. 480 00:16:55,014 --> 00:16:56,493 That's why 481 00:16:56,537 --> 00:16:57,755 I push. 482 00:16:57,799 --> 00:16:59,627 I just want you to be happy. 483 00:16:59,670 --> 00:17:01,324 I am happy. 484 00:17:01,368 --> 00:17:03,805 I have a wonderful life. 485 00:17:03,848 --> 00:17:06,329 That's all I've ever wanted. 486 00:17:07,765 --> 00:17:09,724 You should come back for Thanksgiving. 487 00:17:09,767 --> 00:17:12,074 Really? They do a good Thanksgiving here? 488 00:17:12,118 --> 00:17:14,772 No, it's horrible. Eat first.[chuckles] 489 00:17:16,078 --> 00:17:18,080 - What's happening now? - Oh. 490 00:17:18,124 --> 00:17:20,169 Mom said we should come back for Thanksgiving. 491 00:17:20,213 --> 00:17:21,997 That sounds like major progress, babe. 492 00:17:22,041 --> 00:17:23,607 I'm really happy for you. Just know that Champa 493 00:17:23,651 --> 00:17:25,435 will then probably want us to go there for Christmas 494 00:17:25,479 --> 00:17:28,743 - instead. - Mom, I think I can talk him into... 495 00:17:28,786 --> 00:17:29,831 Mom? 496 00:17:29,874 --> 00:17:32,442 I'm leaving, Sam. 497 00:17:32,486 --> 00:17:33,965 You are? 498 00:17:34,009 --> 00:17:35,880 I can go now. 499 00:17:35,924 --> 00:17:37,708 You've turned out 500 00:17:37,752 --> 00:17:39,449 amazingly. 501 00:17:39,493 --> 00:17:41,234 I'm so proud of you. 502 00:17:44,454 --> 00:17:45,673 The criticism worked. 503 00:17:45,716 --> 00:17:47,109 [chuckles softly] 504 00:17:48,719 --> 00:17:50,286 Goodbye, Mom. 505 00:17:50,330 --> 00:17:52,245 Goodbye, honey. 506 00:17:57,511 --> 00:17:59,469 SAMANTHA: She's gone, Jay. 507 00:18:08,043 --> 00:18:11,133 Sometimes, when we're doing it, 508 00:18:11,177 --> 00:18:13,135 I'll get on his back like a horse, 509 00:18:13,179 --> 00:18:15,833 and I'll steer him around by his arrow. 510 00:18:15,877 --> 00:18:19,054 [Nancy chuckles] That is very vivid imagery. Thank you, Nancy. 511 00:18:19,098 --> 00:18:20,969 I got a lot more images for you. 512 00:18:21,012 --> 00:18:22,666 Here we go. This one time, 513 00:18:22,710 --> 00:18:25,756 he told me to kick him harder... Nancy is amazing.[laughs] 514 00:18:25,800 --> 00:18:28,411 Such a... free spirit. 515 00:18:28,455 --> 00:18:30,674 No pun intended.[chuckles] 516 00:18:30,718 --> 00:18:33,503 And I was like, "You're so wild, 517 00:18:33,547 --> 00:18:35,288 but, okay, if this is your thing..."And she seems really happy. 518 00:18:35,331 --> 00:18:37,855 You must be a good boyfriend, Pete. 519 00:18:37,899 --> 00:18:39,683 [chuckles][chuckles, sighs] 520 00:18:39,727 --> 00:18:41,946 I wish I could be treated well like Nancy. 521 00:18:41,990 --> 00:18:44,906 What? What-what are you saying? 522 00:18:44,949 --> 00:18:46,603 Oh, no, I don't... [chuckles] 523 00:18:46,647 --> 00:18:49,171 Well, it's just when I was alive, 524 00:18:49,215 --> 00:18:51,826 I was with a bunch of cheats and liars. 525 00:18:51,869 --> 00:18:54,350 Maybe 'cause I thought I didn't deserve better. 526 00:18:54,394 --> 00:18:56,135 Well, you do deserve better. 527 00:18:56,178 --> 00:18:57,962 You deserve the best. 528 00:18:58,006 --> 00:19:00,095 [chuckles]: Well, too bad. 529 00:19:00,139 --> 00:19:02,576 Nancy got the last honest guy. 530 00:19:02,619 --> 00:19:05,405 That's me, a real straight arrow. 531 00:19:05,448 --> 00:19:08,147 [chuckles] Certainly wouldn't lie about anything. 532 00:19:08,190 --> 00:19:09,278 JAY: We're home, ghosts! 533 00:19:09,322 --> 00:19:11,759 Or empty room. I have no idea. 534 00:19:11,802 --> 00:19:13,456 They're in here. Hey. 535 00:19:14,501 --> 00:19:15,980 [Nancy groans] 536 00:19:16,024 --> 00:19:17,025 Who's this? 537 00:19:17,068 --> 00:19:18,766 Ah, hi. Nancy. 538 00:19:18,809 --> 00:19:20,507 I'm Pete's girlfriend. 539 00:19:20,550 --> 00:19:22,378 - Pete's girlfriend? - Huh? 540 00:19:22,422 --> 00:19:23,814 Uh, there's a new ghost. 541 00:19:23,858 --> 00:19:25,816 Sure. Cool. 542 00:19:25,860 --> 00:19:27,949 Yep. Yeah, Nancy's my girlfriend, uh, 543 00:19:27,992 --> 00:19:30,038 that sleeps upstairs in my room with me. 544 00:19:30,081 --> 00:19:32,258 [chuckles] We're practically inseparable. 545 00:19:32,301 --> 00:19:34,738 [chuckles] There's no getting away from her. 546 00:19:34,782 --> 00:19:37,306 Honey? Shall we, uh... 547 00:19:37,350 --> 00:19:39,047 Looks like I'm gonna get some. 548 00:19:39,090 --> 00:19:41,049 [Pete groans] 549 00:19:41,092 --> 00:19:43,225 SAMANTHA: So, what happened? 550 00:19:43,269 --> 00:19:46,097 Sleep mode, Sam. Sleep mode happened. 551 00:19:52,278 --> 00:19:55,237 How are you feeling about your mom? 552 00:19:55,281 --> 00:19:57,413 Well, I'm feeling happy for her, obviously. 553 00:19:57,457 --> 00:20:00,111 And that I got to say goodbye. 554 00:20:00,155 --> 00:20:02,810 But I'm sad because it feels like I don't have a mom. 555 00:20:02,853 --> 00:20:04,725 Again. 556 00:20:04,768 --> 00:20:06,292 I know. 557 00:20:07,336 --> 00:20:09,338 You know, she was critical and annoying, 558 00:20:09,382 --> 00:20:11,297 but there's something nice 559 00:20:11,340 --> 00:20:14,125 about feeling like somebody cares that much. 560 00:20:14,169 --> 00:20:15,388 Young lady, 561 00:20:15,431 --> 00:20:16,998 you are aware 562 00:20:17,041 --> 00:20:19,174 that your luggage is languishing by the front door. 563 00:20:19,218 --> 00:20:21,394 I know, it's just been a long day. I'll deal with it tomorrow. 564 00:20:21,437 --> 00:20:23,134 Sorry, Hetty just came in. 565 00:20:23,178 --> 00:20:24,745 Mm, your choice, of course. 566 00:20:24,788 --> 00:20:27,182 It's not the choice I would make nor the right choice, 567 00:20:27,226 --> 00:20:29,924 but it is a choice nonetheless. 568 00:20:29,967 --> 00:20:31,273 What are you smiling about? 569 00:20:31,317 --> 00:20:33,101 Something just made me happy. 570 00:20:33,144 --> 00:20:35,103 - HETTY: - Well, don't stay like that. You'll get laugh lines, 571 00:20:35,146 --> 00:20:37,148 and your husband will wander. 572 00:20:37,192 --> 00:20:39,194 Must I teach this girl everything? 573 00:20:45,809 --> 00:20:53,034 Captioning sponsored by CBS 574 00:20:53,077 --> 00:20:56,255 Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org 575 00:20:56,305 --> 00:21:00,855 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 42270

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