All language subtitles for Almost Never s02e05 The Mall.eng

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:03,080 Oh way 2 00:00:03,080 --> 00:00:04,720 Woohoo! Come on! Ha-ha! 3 00:00:06,280 --> 00:00:07,480 Let's go, boys! 4 00:00:08,720 --> 00:00:10,600 Oh way 5 00:00:10,600 --> 00:00:12,400 Ay oh 6 00:00:12,400 --> 00:00:14,240 Oh way 7 00:00:16,240 --> 00:00:17,880 Oh way 8 00:00:17,880 --> 00:00:19,680 Ay oh 9 00:00:19,680 --> 00:00:21,240 Oh way. 10 00:00:21,240 --> 00:00:22,680 Ha-ha! Come on, boys! 11 00:00:24,080 --> 00:00:26,440 Now, fellas, the shows here are going well, but I think 12 00:00:26,440 --> 00:00:27,960 it's time to step it up a gear. 13 00:00:27,960 --> 00:00:30,000 I've booked you a gig at the mall. 14 00:00:30,000 --> 00:00:33,160 That's awesome. Shopping and music, what's not to love? 15 00:00:33,160 --> 00:00:34,880 Shopping. Which mall? 16 00:00:34,880 --> 00:00:37,280 East Garden or Ocean? Well, they both wanted to book you, 17 00:00:37,280 --> 00:00:38,800 but I thought East Garden. Cool. 18 00:00:38,800 --> 00:00:40,880 Plus, the toilets have those massive hand-dryers 19 00:00:40,880 --> 00:00:43,840 you can stick your face over and pretend you're skydiving. 20 00:00:45,160 --> 00:00:46,560 How are we even related? 21 00:00:48,720 --> 00:00:50,080 See you Saturday. 22 00:00:50,080 --> 00:00:51,320 And don't be late. 23 00:00:51,320 --> 00:00:53,480 All right. See you later. 24 00:00:53,480 --> 00:00:55,800 East Garden! I know. That is... I can't believe it. 25 00:00:55,800 --> 00:00:56,920 I can't wait... 26 00:00:56,920 --> 00:01:00,880 Always know I'm coming, save my seat at the bar 27 00:01:00,880 --> 00:01:03,040 One more for the ladies... 28 00:01:03,040 --> 00:01:04,520 I didn't know you could sing. 29 00:01:05,600 --> 00:01:07,360 You should totally be in a band. 30 00:01:08,520 --> 00:01:09,800 I could never do that. 31 00:01:09,800 --> 00:01:11,920 I get nervous just singing in the shower. 32 00:01:11,920 --> 00:01:13,200 I could help with that. 33 00:01:15,640 --> 00:01:17,880 The nerves part, not...not the shower part. 34 00:01:19,080 --> 00:01:20,600 HE CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY 35 00:01:23,240 --> 00:01:25,240 Well, that wasn't creepy at all. 36 00:01:25,240 --> 00:01:28,680 Aw, looks like Harry's in love. 37 00:01:29,680 --> 00:01:31,800 Harry? All right, guys. This is big. 38 00:01:31,800 --> 00:01:33,120 We need to focus. 39 00:01:33,120 --> 00:01:34,640 Come on, we got this. Let's go. 40 00:01:39,120 --> 00:01:40,480 GENTLE MUSIC PLAYS 41 00:01:40,480 --> 00:01:41,880 Harry? 42 00:01:45,880 --> 00:01:48,360 Does anyone else see the rainbow? 43 00:01:50,400 --> 00:01:53,440 No! No! 44 00:01:53,440 --> 00:01:54,920 Dan, what's wrong? 45 00:01:54,920 --> 00:01:57,520 Some restaurant vlogger is coming to review The Palais. 46 00:01:57,520 --> 00:02:00,080 Apparently, she hates diners, so all of these guys 47 00:02:00,080 --> 00:02:01,440 are going to have to go. 48 00:02:01,440 --> 00:02:04,360 No, not the diners. Diners. 49 00:02:04,360 --> 00:02:06,680 Oh, now I see why you're worried. 50 00:02:06,680 --> 00:02:09,000 Don't tell me it's Meredith Taylor Thomas. 51 00:02:09,000 --> 00:02:10,360 ALL: Who? 52 00:02:10,360 --> 00:02:14,520 Well, that's two hours and 900 calories I'm never getting back. 53 00:02:14,520 --> 00:02:17,600 My flame-grilled was so burnt, they should've served it with aftersun. 54 00:02:17,600 --> 00:02:18,640 MURMURING 55 00:02:18,640 --> 00:02:20,600 One star. Avoid. 56 00:02:20,600 --> 00:02:22,880 One bad review from her and you're toast. 57 00:02:22,880 --> 00:02:25,000 They call her the Grim Eater. 58 00:02:25,000 --> 00:02:27,080 Well, what if we play when she's here? 59 00:02:27,080 --> 00:02:30,560 Yeah, that'll take her mind off the food. Thanks...I think. 60 00:02:30,560 --> 00:02:32,880 I was dreading Saturday. I'm just a bit nervous now. 61 00:02:32,880 --> 00:02:35,400 Saturday? You can't. You've got a gig at East Garden. 62 00:02:35,400 --> 00:02:37,440 I love East Garden! They have those hand-dryers 63 00:02:37,440 --> 00:02:39,440 that make your face flat. 64 00:02:39,440 --> 00:02:41,640 See?! Skydiving buddy. 65 00:02:41,640 --> 00:02:43,520 I'm sorry, Dan. It is East Garden. 66 00:02:43,520 --> 00:02:44,760 Nate, I get it. 67 00:02:44,760 --> 00:02:46,360 We could play here on Saturday. 68 00:02:46,360 --> 00:02:48,040 That'd be cool. Really? 69 00:02:48,040 --> 00:02:49,720 There you go. Problem solved. 70 00:02:49,720 --> 00:02:51,600 You princesses shall go to the mall. 71 00:02:51,600 --> 00:02:54,120 Wait, doesn't Sasha have to OK it first? 72 00:02:54,120 --> 00:02:56,920 It's our band. We can make our own decisions. 73 00:02:56,920 --> 00:02:59,280 No, we can't. Yeah. Like, not ever. 74 00:02:59,280 --> 00:03:01,440 When was the last time Sasha got us a gig? 75 00:03:01,440 --> 00:03:04,680 Time we took control. The three of us, together. 76 00:03:08,320 --> 00:03:11,120 Fine. I'll do it on my own. 77 00:03:18,080 --> 00:03:19,880 INTERNAL MONOLOGUE: Here I go. 78 00:03:21,680 --> 00:03:22,760 This is it. 79 00:03:25,040 --> 00:03:26,400 Do you think she'll attack me? 80 00:03:26,400 --> 00:03:29,120 You never know. When I was five, I stuck my finger in a beehive, 81 00:03:29,120 --> 00:03:31,200 hoping to make some fluffy little friends. 82 00:03:31,200 --> 00:03:32,720 But it did not go well. 83 00:03:32,720 --> 00:03:33,920 Oh, did they sting you? 84 00:03:33,920 --> 00:03:37,920 So many times, I now get nervous around stripes. And spots. 85 00:03:37,920 --> 00:03:39,160 I can't do this. 86 00:03:39,160 --> 00:03:40,680 Let's all go in. 87 00:03:40,680 --> 00:03:42,520 She can't sting all of us. 88 00:03:42,520 --> 00:03:43,920 The stinger's in the bum, 89 00:03:43,920 --> 00:03:45,800 so if she turns her back on us, run. 90 00:03:47,840 --> 00:03:50,280 Thought we kissed goodbye 91 00:03:50,280 --> 00:03:52,560 Thought that we meant this time 92 00:03:52,560 --> 00:03:53,960 Was the last 93 00:03:53,960 --> 00:03:57,360 But I guess it's never really over 94 00:03:57,360 --> 00:03:59,600 Thought that we drew a line 95 00:03:59,600 --> 00:04:02,080 Right through you and I 96 00:04:02,080 --> 00:04:03,960 Can't keep going back 97 00:04:03,960 --> 00:04:06,400 I guess it's never really over. 98 00:04:07,520 --> 00:04:10,320 We need to be tighter. We'll go again. 99 00:04:10,320 --> 00:04:11,760 Something's not right. 100 00:04:11,760 --> 00:04:13,200 You know what we need? 101 00:04:13,200 --> 00:04:15,440 A backing singer. A girl with a great voice, 102 00:04:15,440 --> 00:04:16,800 who gives us a rounder sound. 103 00:04:16,800 --> 00:04:19,000 BOTH: Tyra is not joining the band. 104 00:04:19,000 --> 00:04:22,680 What? I wasn't suggesting her. Could be anyone. 105 00:04:22,680 --> 00:04:26,240 But now you mention it, Tyra would be a perfect fit. 106 00:04:26,240 --> 00:04:27,800 Just because you fancy her. 107 00:04:27,800 --> 00:04:29,800 Who fancies who? 108 00:04:29,800 --> 00:04:31,160 Oh, Harry has a huge crush on... 109 00:04:31,160 --> 00:04:32,320 Peppa Pig's mum. 110 00:04:33,400 --> 00:04:35,880 OK. That's different. 111 00:04:35,880 --> 00:04:38,080 I mean, a crush is a bit strong. 112 00:04:38,080 --> 00:04:40,240 It's more I like animated pigs. 113 00:04:42,280 --> 00:04:43,360 Right. 114 00:04:49,600 --> 00:04:52,080 THEY LAUGH 115 00:04:52,080 --> 00:04:53,560 It's not funny. 116 00:04:53,560 --> 00:04:55,200 All right. Let's go again. 117 00:04:55,200 --> 00:04:58,400 Uh, I'm going to dedicate this one to, uh, Peppa Pig's mum. 118 00:04:58,400 --> 00:05:01,640 Yeah. All right, let's go. 119 00:05:01,640 --> 00:05:04,160 One, two, three, four. 120 00:05:04,160 --> 00:05:06,320 I think it's a great idea. 121 00:05:06,320 --> 00:05:08,640 Go for it, girls. Thanks, Sasha. 122 00:05:08,640 --> 00:05:10,160 Yeah, thanks. 123 00:05:10,160 --> 00:05:11,600 And thanks for not stinging us. 124 00:05:13,000 --> 00:05:15,480 What are you up to? Do tell. 125 00:05:15,480 --> 00:05:17,160 I'm not up to anything. 126 00:05:17,160 --> 00:05:20,480 Oh, please. You're always cooking up some new plan. 127 00:05:20,480 --> 00:05:25,240 Well, my new plan is to be nicer to people, 128 00:05:25,240 --> 00:05:27,680 starting with The Wonderland. 129 00:05:27,680 --> 00:05:29,520 I've been too hard on them. 130 00:05:29,520 --> 00:05:30,800 It's their time to shine. 131 00:05:32,040 --> 00:05:34,920 Wow. This baby has already changed you. 132 00:05:36,760 --> 00:05:39,320 Hello in there. It's Fabio! 133 00:05:40,400 --> 00:05:42,480 Can you tell your mummy to give me a raise? 134 00:05:52,080 --> 00:05:54,480 Urgh! That spaghetti was so dense, 135 00:05:54,480 --> 00:05:57,360 it should've been sat in the corner wearing a pointy hat. 136 00:05:57,360 --> 00:05:59,400 Half a star. Keep away. 137 00:06:00,640 --> 00:06:01,840 HE GROANS 138 00:06:01,840 --> 00:06:04,280 Dan, what's up? It's a disaster! 139 00:06:04,280 --> 00:06:06,160 Well, I think you look lovely. 140 00:06:06,160 --> 00:06:09,800 Not this. That. I've got this vicious vlogger coming tomorrow 141 00:06:09,800 --> 00:06:10,920 and I've got no staff. 142 00:06:10,920 --> 00:06:12,640 Service has to be like... HE SNAPS FINGERS 143 00:06:12,640 --> 00:06:14,320 Well, I can help you tomorrow. 144 00:06:14,320 --> 00:06:16,280 Yeah? You sure you want to? 145 00:06:16,280 --> 00:06:18,400 I mean, this vlogger's a very demanding customer. 146 00:06:18,400 --> 00:06:20,920 Well, she hasn't seen the... 147 00:06:20,920 --> 00:06:25,400 IN ROBOTIC VOICE: Meg-atronic T20, has she, huh? 148 00:06:25,400 --> 00:06:28,160 No. No. Here to serve and protect. 149 00:06:29,240 --> 00:06:31,480 Welcome to the team, I guess. 150 00:06:31,480 --> 00:06:36,160 IN ROBOTIC VOICE: Thank you, Dan. I'm going to the shops now. 151 00:06:37,360 --> 00:06:38,400 Bye-bye. 152 00:06:50,600 --> 00:06:52,360 HE SINGS 153 00:06:53,760 --> 00:06:56,800 Harry? Where are the others? 154 00:06:56,800 --> 00:06:58,480 Don't know. OK, listen up. 155 00:06:58,480 --> 00:06:59,760 About tomorrow's gig... 156 00:07:01,640 --> 00:07:03,840 Harry, I can't believe you let me join The Wonderland! 157 00:07:03,840 --> 00:07:05,240 Neither can I! 158 00:07:05,240 --> 00:07:07,080 You're amazing. Let's get married. 159 00:07:07,080 --> 00:07:09,680 Best day ever! Best day ever! 160 00:07:13,160 --> 00:07:15,240 Harry? Are you listening to me? 161 00:07:15,240 --> 00:07:17,240 Yeah, Tyra. Chloe! Of course. 162 00:07:18,600 --> 00:07:20,720 OK, so, don't be late. 163 00:07:20,720 --> 00:07:23,680 I'm getting a lift in with Jordan. So, I'll see you guys there. 164 00:07:28,720 --> 00:07:31,120 HE SINGS SOFTLY 165 00:07:36,080 --> 00:07:38,800 SHE ATTEMPTS SOUTHERN US ACCENT: Welcome to the Palais Diner. 166 00:07:38,800 --> 00:07:40,800 Now, what can I get y'all fine gentlemen 167 00:07:40,800 --> 00:07:43,000 for your breakfast this morning? 168 00:07:43,000 --> 00:07:45,160 Oh, does Dan know you're doing the accent? 169 00:07:45,160 --> 00:07:47,000 Yeah, why? Is it no good? 170 00:07:47,000 --> 00:07:50,120 It's... No, no, it's great, isn't it, Oakley? 171 00:07:50,120 --> 00:07:52,080 Yeah. Best Australian accent ever. 172 00:07:52,080 --> 00:07:53,320 Oh. 173 00:07:53,320 --> 00:07:55,120 You're going be great, love. 174 00:07:55,120 --> 00:07:56,640 Thank you, love. 175 00:07:56,640 --> 00:07:58,840 SHE ATTEMPTS ACCENT: Now, how would you like your eggs 176 00:07:58,840 --> 00:08:02,040 this morning, gentlemen? Sunny side up, 177 00:08:02,040 --> 00:08:04,280 over easy or scrambled? 178 00:08:04,280 --> 00:08:06,880 HE ATTEMPTS AMERICAN ACCENT: Oh, sunny side up sounds fun. 179 00:08:06,880 --> 00:08:08,360 No, no, no, you have to say scrambled 180 00:08:08,360 --> 00:08:10,880 because I've got no idea what the other two are. OK, well, 181 00:08:10,880 --> 00:08:13,440 scrambled it is. Love you. 182 00:08:13,440 --> 00:08:15,560 WITH ACCENT: Oh, I love you, too, missy. 183 00:08:15,560 --> 00:08:20,480 She sure is a fine lady, that mother of yours, Oakley. 184 00:08:20,480 --> 00:08:23,080 HE CONTINUES ACCENT: Oakley. Oakley. 185 00:08:29,400 --> 00:08:30,880 Howdy, y'all... 186 00:08:30,880 --> 00:08:33,920 Oh, wow. Oh, it's hot in here. What's going on? 187 00:08:33,920 --> 00:08:35,960 I don't want to talk about it. 188 00:08:35,960 --> 00:08:39,200 His salted caramel cheesecake collapsed overnight. 189 00:08:39,200 --> 00:08:41,920 And the air-con's on the blink. OK, well, we'll just get cracking 190 00:08:41,920 --> 00:08:44,640 on another cheesecake. There isn't time. I still need to buy 191 00:08:44,640 --> 00:08:46,320 fresh organic vegetables for the curry. 192 00:08:46,320 --> 00:08:48,560 It's Meredith's favourite thing. I'll tell you what. 193 00:08:48,560 --> 00:08:50,560 I'll make another cheesecake while you go out. 194 00:08:50,560 --> 00:08:52,880 Can you make one? Of course I can make one. 195 00:08:52,880 --> 00:08:55,280 Have you, uh, have you got a block of cheese? 196 00:08:55,280 --> 00:08:56,880 Uh... 197 00:08:56,880 --> 00:09:00,040 CHUCKLING: I'm just kidding. Your face! Go on. Go. 198 00:09:03,280 --> 00:09:04,680 Don't touch it. 199 00:09:04,680 --> 00:09:06,760 He went nuts when I tried to fix it. 200 00:09:06,760 --> 00:09:11,640 Yeah, well, my dear, when the cat's away, 201 00:09:11,640 --> 00:09:14,640 the mice will play. THERMOSTAT BEEPS 202 00:09:14,640 --> 00:09:17,400 AIR-CON WHIRRS Oh, yeah. That is nice. 203 00:09:17,400 --> 00:09:19,480 You getting that? Oh, stunning. 204 00:09:20,520 --> 00:09:23,280 Right. Good. 205 00:09:25,440 --> 00:09:27,600 THERMOSTAT BEEPS CONTINUSOUSLY 206 00:09:30,360 --> 00:09:33,040 Looks like you were right to worry about overcrowding. 207 00:09:33,040 --> 00:09:34,520 Oh, are people here already? 208 00:09:34,520 --> 00:09:37,360 Yeah, there's lots of chat online. It's going to be huge. Nice. 209 00:09:37,360 --> 00:09:39,440 What's ETA on the boys? They're on their way. 210 00:09:41,720 --> 00:09:44,160 AJ, are you sure this is the right way? 211 00:09:44,160 --> 00:09:46,520 Yeah, don't worry about it. There's a short cut 212 00:09:46,520 --> 00:09:48,920 just around this great corner. 213 00:09:48,920 --> 00:09:51,680 Oh. Wow. Great short cut, Dad. 214 00:09:53,200 --> 00:09:55,200 I thought the road went all the way. 215 00:09:55,200 --> 00:09:57,080 The mall's just across this field. 216 00:09:57,080 --> 00:09:58,920 Great. Let's jump in the tractor. 217 00:09:58,920 --> 00:10:01,560 We don't have a tractor. There is no tractor. 218 00:10:01,560 --> 00:10:03,480 We've never had a tractor. 219 00:10:03,480 --> 00:10:05,800 Come on, guys, it'll be quicker to walk. Let's go. 220 00:10:05,800 --> 00:10:08,000 But I haven't got my wellies. You don't have wellies! 221 00:10:08,000 --> 00:10:11,280 What? No tractor, no wellies. 222 00:10:11,280 --> 00:10:12,960 What kind of farmer am I? 223 00:10:12,960 --> 00:10:14,280 You're not a farmer! Oh. 224 00:10:21,560 --> 00:10:24,880 Why won't it stop? Well, because it's an evil air-con that hates us. 225 00:10:26,320 --> 00:10:27,640 It's cold. 226 00:10:27,640 --> 00:10:31,360 I can't feel my toes. Girls, I recommend we do a very long warm-up. 227 00:10:31,360 --> 00:10:33,360 It's going to be a busy, busy day. 228 00:10:33,360 --> 00:10:35,720 Can anyone else hear a buzzing sound? 229 00:10:35,720 --> 00:10:38,640 Where is Dan and why is it so cold in here? 230 00:10:38,640 --> 00:10:40,280 He went out to get some food. 231 00:10:40,280 --> 00:10:42,440 He left us in charge. Why? Are you going to complain 232 00:10:42,440 --> 00:10:43,720 about the temperature? 233 00:10:43,720 --> 00:10:46,320 I'm was going to ask if you wanted some help to fix it. 234 00:10:46,320 --> 00:10:49,320 I've fixed enough dodgy mixing desks in my day. 235 00:10:49,320 --> 00:10:50,760 I think I can handle this. 236 00:10:55,120 --> 00:10:57,840 WHISPERING: Why's she got a screwdriver? 237 00:10:57,840 --> 00:11:01,880 421 men went to mow, went to mow a meadow 238 00:11:01,880 --> 00:11:07,320 421 men, 420 men, 419 men 418 men... 239 00:11:07,320 --> 00:11:10,560 Oakley, only ten men went to mow a meadow. 240 00:11:13,000 --> 00:11:14,680 Oh, it's got me. 241 00:11:14,680 --> 00:11:16,960 Urgh! Urgh! The ground's trying to eat me! 242 00:11:16,960 --> 00:11:18,680 Oh, the field's got my shoe! 243 00:11:20,200 --> 00:11:22,160 Get it, will you? I'm not putting my hand in there. 244 00:11:22,160 --> 00:11:24,600 I might not get it back. We can't be late for this gig. 245 00:11:24,600 --> 00:11:25,640 Stand back. 246 00:11:27,160 --> 00:11:28,640 The things I do for this band. 247 00:11:37,480 --> 00:11:39,120 Feel anything? 248 00:11:39,120 --> 00:11:40,160 Mud. 249 00:11:42,280 --> 00:11:45,880 Worms, urgh. Slime. Urgh. 250 00:11:45,880 --> 00:11:47,560 More mud. 251 00:11:47,560 --> 00:11:49,680 Wait. A shoe. 252 00:11:51,320 --> 00:11:52,360 I think... 253 00:11:55,440 --> 00:11:57,160 ..I think that's it. 254 00:11:57,160 --> 00:11:59,000 Is that even a shoe? 255 00:11:59,000 --> 00:12:01,720 From now on, I'm going to every gig in my wellies. 256 00:12:01,720 --> 00:12:03,280 You still don't have wellies. 257 00:12:03,280 --> 00:12:05,400 Oh, yeah. I'll just take the tractor. 258 00:12:05,400 --> 00:12:07,720 Come on, guys, we can do this. Pass the guitar. 259 00:12:10,560 --> 00:12:13,320 THEY LAUGH Oh, my days. 260 00:12:15,320 --> 00:12:17,200 Oh! 261 00:12:17,200 --> 00:12:19,320 Oh. Oakley, no... 262 00:12:19,320 --> 00:12:22,000 Oh. What are you doing? 263 00:12:22,000 --> 00:12:24,280 That wasn't as much fun as expected. 264 00:12:24,280 --> 00:12:26,800 Can I just say this day's not going well? 265 00:12:26,800 --> 00:12:30,040 Well, Mum said whatever doesn't kill you only makes you stronger. 266 00:12:30,040 --> 00:12:31,720 BULL GRUNTS 267 00:12:33,200 --> 00:12:34,960 I think that can kill you. 268 00:12:34,960 --> 00:12:36,360 Weirdly, that never came up. 269 00:12:36,360 --> 00:12:37,480 ALL: Run. 270 00:12:38,560 --> 00:12:40,360 Oakley, you're wearing red! Go that way! 271 00:12:40,360 --> 00:12:41,760 Wait, wait, my shoe! Run! 272 00:12:41,760 --> 00:12:43,200 Wait, no, I'm coming with you guys! 273 00:12:43,200 --> 00:12:44,240 BULL MOOS 274 00:12:54,400 --> 00:12:57,120 You fixed it. Life-saver. 275 00:12:57,120 --> 00:13:00,280 It's only a temporary fix, so I wouldn't touch it. 276 00:13:04,840 --> 00:13:08,040 That's, uh, unusually helpful of you. 277 00:13:08,040 --> 00:13:10,280 Us girls have to stick together, right? 278 00:13:13,040 --> 00:13:15,560 She wants organic, these come with slugs. 279 00:13:18,840 --> 00:13:22,400 AUDIENCE CHANTS: Wonderland! Wonderland! Wonderland! 280 00:13:24,120 --> 00:13:27,000 If they don't get here soon, I'll have to cancel the show. 281 00:13:27,000 --> 00:13:29,280 Please don't cancel, all right? They'll be here. 282 00:13:29,280 --> 00:13:32,240 If that crowd starts to turn ugly, I'm shutting you down. 283 00:13:32,240 --> 00:13:34,400 AUDIENCE CHANTS: Wonderland! Wonderland! 284 00:13:34,400 --> 00:13:36,320 Where are they? I'll call them. 285 00:13:38,520 --> 00:13:40,280 NATE: Hey, Chloe. 286 00:13:40,280 --> 00:13:41,680 You're late. 287 00:13:41,680 --> 00:13:43,520 Yeah, about that. 288 00:13:43,520 --> 00:13:45,320 How much longer are you going to be? 289 00:13:45,320 --> 00:13:47,960 Oh, kind of hard to say. 290 00:13:47,960 --> 00:13:50,920 Well, if you don't get here soon, they're going to cancel the gig. 291 00:13:50,920 --> 00:13:52,120 LOW MOOING SOUND 292 00:13:52,120 --> 00:13:53,920 Can I hear cows? 293 00:13:53,920 --> 00:13:56,480 If only. It's a bull. 294 00:13:56,480 --> 00:13:59,240 Well, tell Harry and Oakley to stop messing around and... 295 00:13:59,240 --> 00:14:01,880 Wonderland! Wonderland! Wonderland! 296 00:14:01,880 --> 00:14:02,920 ..hurry up! 297 00:14:03,920 --> 00:14:06,160 I'm serious, we're trapped. 298 00:14:06,160 --> 00:14:08,960 Chloe? Chloe?! Shh, keep your voice down. 299 00:14:08,960 --> 00:14:11,240 BULL MOOS 300 00:14:11,240 --> 00:14:13,000 We can't stay up here any longer. 301 00:14:13,000 --> 00:14:14,840 We've got a gig to play. 302 00:14:14,840 --> 00:14:17,480 Oakley, you want to check if it's, uh, safe? 303 00:14:18,800 --> 00:14:21,320 I don't really want to...moo-ve. 304 00:14:24,600 --> 00:14:26,920 Not the right time? No, definitely not the right time. 305 00:14:26,920 --> 00:14:28,080 No? OK. 306 00:14:32,320 --> 00:14:33,920 Too spicy? 307 00:14:33,920 --> 00:14:35,040 I think it's quite... 308 00:14:36,640 --> 00:14:38,560 Oh! Oh! Oh! 309 00:14:40,080 --> 00:14:45,040 Ah, your faces! No, I think it's really lovely, actually. 310 00:14:45,040 --> 00:14:46,240 Good one. 311 00:14:46,240 --> 00:14:48,320 Right, now all we need is that self-satisfied, 312 00:14:48,320 --> 00:14:50,400 smug loudmouth to show up. 313 00:14:50,400 --> 00:14:52,240 Dan, she's right there. 314 00:14:52,240 --> 00:14:55,880 You think I'm going to fall for that one? She's not joking. 315 00:14:55,880 --> 00:14:58,560 Did you think I was born yesterday? Dan, she's standing there. 316 00:14:58,560 --> 00:15:00,800 OK, I get the joke. It's very, very funny. 317 00:15:00,800 --> 00:15:02,040 Dan, she's right behind you. 318 00:15:02,040 --> 00:15:04,480 OK, there is no way that Meredith Twaddlechops 319 00:15:04,480 --> 00:15:06,280 is standing... Hey! 320 00:15:06,280 --> 00:15:09,120 Hey! Welcome to The Palais. 321 00:15:09,120 --> 00:15:12,880 Twaddlechops? Yeah, they were on the menu, but we sold out. 322 00:15:12,880 --> 00:15:15,240 Good recovery. Yeah, I thought so. 323 00:15:15,240 --> 00:15:17,680 Let me show you to your table. 324 00:15:17,680 --> 00:15:19,600 Find Sasha. Tell her to start. 325 00:15:25,160 --> 00:15:26,200 Oh. 326 00:15:27,760 --> 00:15:29,680 Erm, all right. 327 00:15:33,800 --> 00:15:35,880 BIRD CALLS 328 00:15:57,760 --> 00:15:59,560 Come on, guys. We're nearly there. 329 00:16:00,560 --> 00:16:01,840 I can't take this any more. 330 00:16:01,840 --> 00:16:03,240 It's only been two minutes. 331 00:16:08,920 --> 00:16:12,120 AUDIENCE CHANT: Wonderland! Wonderland! Wonderland! 332 00:16:12,120 --> 00:16:13,520 PHONE RINGS 333 00:16:16,120 --> 00:16:19,120 Hurry up. There's going to be a riot. 334 00:16:19,120 --> 00:16:21,280 All right, don't get mad, 335 00:16:21,280 --> 00:16:23,680 but we're in some maze. 336 00:16:23,680 --> 00:16:27,280 Some maze?! Nate, this is not funny. 337 00:16:27,280 --> 00:16:28,840 Why are you in a maze? 338 00:16:28,840 --> 00:16:32,000 Well, it's not a maze, it's... You should see it, Chloe. 339 00:16:32,000 --> 00:16:33,680 It's a-maze-ing. 340 00:16:33,680 --> 00:16:36,480 Don't worry. When have I ever let you down? 341 00:16:36,480 --> 00:16:37,680 SPLATTERING SOUND 342 00:16:38,720 --> 00:16:39,800 Whoops. 343 00:16:39,800 --> 00:16:41,200 "Whoops" what?! 344 00:16:41,200 --> 00:16:44,240 You've fallen in a cowpat. 345 00:16:44,240 --> 00:16:46,080 A cowpat? Try not to talk. 346 00:16:46,080 --> 00:16:47,880 Well, you're just sinking further. 347 00:16:47,880 --> 00:16:49,800 It's fine. Nate's going to rescue you. 348 00:16:49,800 --> 00:16:52,160 Me?! I got the shoe! You dropped her in there. 349 00:16:52,160 --> 00:16:54,600 Well, stop being a wuss and somebody grab the... 350 00:16:54,600 --> 00:16:56,440 SQUELCHING SOUND 351 00:16:56,440 --> 00:16:59,320 We lost her. All right, Chloe, hold your breath. 352 00:16:59,320 --> 00:17:00,360 I'm coming in. 353 00:17:05,240 --> 00:17:06,520 HE RETCHES 354 00:17:10,520 --> 00:17:12,960 Hey, you should change your network to O-Poo. 355 00:17:14,680 --> 00:17:17,520 Just no. Still not the right time? 356 00:17:17,520 --> 00:17:20,760 Definitely not the right time. Stop with these jokes, man. 357 00:17:20,760 --> 00:17:22,600 THEY VOCALISE 358 00:17:24,160 --> 00:17:27,480 Argh! I hear a bee. 359 00:17:27,480 --> 00:17:30,040 Does it sound like this? Buzz! 360 00:17:30,040 --> 00:17:32,000 Miri, you have to get over this phobia. 361 00:17:32,000 --> 00:17:35,440 Sorry, I can't help it. I hear that sound and I just want to run. 362 00:17:35,440 --> 00:17:38,080 I have to say, I am loving the new you. 363 00:17:38,080 --> 00:17:41,800 Kind, caring, generous - what's not to like? 364 00:17:41,800 --> 00:17:44,080 Don't be an idiot. 365 00:17:44,080 --> 00:17:45,560 It's all an act. 366 00:17:45,560 --> 00:17:48,240 Oh, right. OK. 367 00:17:48,240 --> 00:17:51,040 HE CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY Yay! 368 00:17:51,040 --> 00:17:52,800 It's good to have you back. 369 00:17:52,800 --> 00:17:55,760 Um, so, what is the plan? 370 00:17:55,760 --> 00:17:57,840 I'll tell the vlogger that the Wonderland 371 00:17:57,840 --> 00:18:01,120 let Dan down and we stepped in to save the day. 372 00:18:01,120 --> 00:18:02,920 Good press for us. 373 00:18:02,920 --> 00:18:05,680 Bad press for the Wonderlosers. 374 00:18:05,680 --> 00:18:07,720 Oh! I knew it. 375 00:18:12,320 --> 00:18:14,840 AUDIENCE CHANT: Wonderland! Wonderland! Wonderland! 376 00:18:14,840 --> 00:18:16,440 I promise, they're on the way. 377 00:18:16,440 --> 00:18:18,640 They're running towards the entrance now. 378 00:18:22,840 --> 00:18:24,200 We're in! Where now? 379 00:18:24,200 --> 00:18:25,520 The stage is on the upper level. 380 00:18:25,520 --> 00:18:27,320 You should see some lifts in front of you. 381 00:18:27,320 --> 00:18:30,000 What lifts? There's an escalator. Come on. Let's go. 382 00:18:49,720 --> 00:18:51,680 I'm telling you, she's up to her usual tricks. 383 00:18:51,680 --> 00:18:52,920 She's lying. 384 00:18:52,920 --> 00:18:55,160 I never said that. I can't believe I even fell for it. 385 00:18:55,160 --> 00:18:57,360 You should never have let her in in the first place. 386 00:18:57,360 --> 00:18:59,040 Can we just keep our voices down, please? 387 00:18:59,040 --> 00:19:01,360 I don't want to make a scene in front of our special guest. 388 00:19:01,360 --> 00:19:04,040 She started it. You started it by being you. 389 00:19:04,040 --> 00:19:07,960 And by "you" I mean an...evil witch! 390 00:19:07,960 --> 00:19:10,480 This, coming from the woman that broke your thermostat 391 00:19:10,480 --> 00:19:12,480 while you were out. You broke the thermostat?! 392 00:19:12,480 --> 00:19:14,200 I told Tyra no-one should touch it. 393 00:19:14,200 --> 00:19:15,960 It was boiling. I'm sorry. 394 00:19:15,960 --> 00:19:17,400 Everything OK? She's not happy. 395 00:19:17,400 --> 00:19:20,600 The curry... I knew I shouldn't have overdone it with the chilli! 396 00:19:20,600 --> 00:19:22,880 No, it's not that. It's the bad lighting? 397 00:19:22,880 --> 00:19:25,120 It's the wonky pool table? No, it's... Smelly toilets? 398 00:19:25,120 --> 00:19:27,320 The uncomfortable chairs? The rubbish hand-dryers? 399 00:19:27,320 --> 00:19:29,600 Sticky floors... Enough complaining! 400 00:19:29,600 --> 00:19:31,600 Everyone stop talking apart from you. 401 00:19:31,600 --> 00:19:33,360 She's not happy there's no live music. 402 00:19:33,360 --> 00:19:36,920 Hm. Do you want to talk some more about how awful I am? 403 00:19:36,920 --> 00:19:38,640 Or would you like my girls to sing? 404 00:19:40,120 --> 00:19:46,200 Don't you dare say anything about my boys to that blogger over there. 405 00:19:46,200 --> 00:19:47,280 Or I'll... 406 00:19:49,080 --> 00:19:50,120 Or else! 407 00:19:51,360 --> 00:19:52,440 Just joking. 408 00:19:53,880 --> 00:19:57,560 Seriously, some people... 409 00:20:01,480 --> 00:20:03,520 Yeah. Go, Meg. 410 00:20:09,600 --> 00:20:11,000 Come on. It must be this way. 411 00:20:11,000 --> 00:20:12,680 Wait, where's Oakley? 412 00:20:12,680 --> 00:20:14,400 Oh, my... I don't... 413 00:20:15,880 --> 00:20:17,000 Oakley? 414 00:20:18,160 --> 00:20:19,240 Oakley?! 415 00:20:26,080 --> 00:20:30,520 Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to The Palais! 416 00:20:30,520 --> 00:20:33,040 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 417 00:20:33,040 --> 00:20:38,080 Home of live music and fine dining. 418 00:20:38,080 --> 00:20:39,760 Woo! SCATTERED APPLAUSE 419 00:20:41,840 --> 00:20:45,120 Well, it gives me great pleasure to introduce 420 00:20:45,120 --> 00:20:49,320 our special guest for today, Girls Here First. 421 00:20:49,320 --> 00:20:50,600 Woo! 422 00:20:50,600 --> 00:20:52,120 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 423 00:20:52,120 --> 00:20:53,280 Go get them, girls. 424 00:20:55,280 --> 00:20:56,640 ELECTRICAL BUZZING SOUND 425 00:20:57,640 --> 00:20:59,440 Bees! Argh, bees! 426 00:20:59,440 --> 00:21:01,920 Miri, wait! It's the air-con! Get her! 427 00:21:06,720 --> 00:21:08,880 Erm... Uh... 428 00:21:11,240 --> 00:21:18,160 Erm, but before that, sit back and enjoy the vocal stylings 429 00:21:18,160 --> 00:21:22,280 of our very own...Meg! 430 00:21:23,440 --> 00:21:25,680 TYRA: Woo! What are you going to do? What? OK? 431 00:21:28,400 --> 00:21:29,440 My time to shine. 432 00:21:33,240 --> 00:21:34,280 Hit it. 433 00:21:35,880 --> 00:21:39,240 MUSIC: Love Machine by Girls Aloud 434 00:21:44,640 --> 00:21:46,400 OFF-KEY: Ladies, you're darn right 435 00:21:46,400 --> 00:21:48,440 You can't read a man's mind 436 00:21:48,440 --> 00:21:50,600 We're living in two tribes 437 00:21:50,600 --> 00:21:52,440 And heading for war... 438 00:21:53,520 --> 00:21:55,920 What are you doing? Seriously? 439 00:22:00,720 --> 00:22:03,000 Oakley? What are you doing? Come on. 440 00:22:12,000 --> 00:22:13,720 Where's the stage? Where's the fans? 441 00:22:13,720 --> 00:22:16,640 We're on the top floor. There's nothing here. 442 00:22:16,640 --> 00:22:18,960 Please tell me you're at Ocean. 443 00:22:18,960 --> 00:22:21,520 The Ocean? We're at East Garden, like you said. 444 00:22:21,520 --> 00:22:24,280 Harry, I told you the gig had switched to Ocean Mall. 445 00:22:24,280 --> 00:22:25,440 What? 446 00:22:27,040 --> 00:22:28,960 East Garden were worried about overcrowding, 447 00:22:28,960 --> 00:22:30,920 so Jordan moved the gig to Ocean Mall. 448 00:22:32,400 --> 00:22:35,200 Harry? Are you listening to me? 449 00:22:35,200 --> 00:22:37,120 Yeah, Tyra. Chloe! Of course. 450 00:22:38,560 --> 00:22:41,480 DISTANT VOICE: Harry, are you listening to me? 451 00:22:41,480 --> 00:22:43,320 We're at the wrong mall. 452 00:22:43,320 --> 00:22:46,160 Urgh. Harry. Oh, made it just in time. 453 00:22:46,160 --> 00:22:49,040 Where is everyone? At the Ocean. Whoa, what are they all doing there? 454 00:22:49,040 --> 00:22:51,000 And why have you got mud on you? It's a long story. 455 00:22:51,000 --> 00:22:53,080 We'll explain on the way. Let's go. 456 00:22:53,080 --> 00:22:55,280 Uh, Oakley, it's this way, mate. 457 00:22:55,280 --> 00:22:56,320 Oh. 458 00:22:58,800 --> 00:23:02,040 That's it. Oh, whoa, wait, listen. Give them a chance. 459 00:23:02,040 --> 00:23:04,760 They're on their way. They've had all the chances they're getting. 460 00:23:04,760 --> 00:23:07,240 I'm calling it. Wait! 461 00:23:07,240 --> 00:23:08,760 I've got an idea that'll work. 462 00:23:08,760 --> 00:23:11,280 AUDIENCE CHANTS: Wonderland! Wonderland! Wonderland! 463 00:23:13,320 --> 00:23:17,280 I'm just a love machine Feeding my fantasy 464 00:23:17,280 --> 00:23:20,120 Give me a kiss or three 465 00:23:20,120 --> 00:23:21,320 And I'm fine 466 00:23:21,320 --> 00:23:23,360 I need a squeeze a day 467 00:23:23,360 --> 00:23:25,640 Oh, in this negligee... 468 00:23:25,640 --> 00:23:28,400 Oh, this needs to end! 469 00:23:28,400 --> 00:23:29,960 This time. 470 00:23:29,960 --> 00:23:32,280 So, that happened. 471 00:23:32,280 --> 00:23:33,960 That was astonishing. 472 00:23:33,960 --> 00:23:35,600 Thank you, Meg. 473 00:23:35,600 --> 00:23:36,640 Thank you. 474 00:23:36,640 --> 00:23:40,600 Oh, well, ladies and gentlemen, please sit back, 475 00:23:40,600 --> 00:23:41,920 enjoy the rest of your food 476 00:23:41,920 --> 00:23:45,360 and the next act will be on in two minutes. 477 00:23:45,360 --> 00:23:47,960 Urgh! You're up. 478 00:23:47,960 --> 00:23:49,920 What? I'm not going up there. 479 00:23:49,920 --> 00:23:51,640 Well, Harry said you had a great voice. 480 00:23:51,640 --> 00:23:53,440 He wouldn't stop going on about it. 481 00:23:53,440 --> 00:23:55,000 But I've never sung in public before. 482 00:23:55,000 --> 00:23:57,480 Well, there's a first time for everything. Please. 483 00:23:57,480 --> 00:23:59,200 For The Palais. 484 00:23:59,200 --> 00:24:01,560 I'm sorry... Guys, I'll go back up. BOTH: No! 485 00:24:02,880 --> 00:24:04,960 I...I can do it. 486 00:24:11,240 --> 00:24:13,000 I wasn't that bad, was I? Yes. 487 00:24:14,040 --> 00:24:15,080 Charming. 488 00:24:21,040 --> 00:24:23,840 HEART THUMPS 489 00:24:32,760 --> 00:24:34,880 I live for the night-time 490 00:24:34,880 --> 00:24:36,920 Creature of the dark 491 00:24:36,920 --> 00:24:38,920 Always know I'm coming 492 00:24:38,920 --> 00:24:41,200 Save my seat at the bar 493 00:24:41,200 --> 00:24:43,280 One more for the ladies 494 00:24:43,280 --> 00:24:45,440 One more shot of gold 495 00:24:45,440 --> 00:24:47,000 Come on, keep them coming 496 00:24:47,000 --> 00:24:49,120 Like we're never getting old 497 00:24:49,120 --> 00:24:51,120 When the people are sleeping 498 00:24:51,120 --> 00:24:53,320 That's when I come alive 499 00:24:53,320 --> 00:24:55,440 All the secrets I'm keeping 500 00:24:55,440 --> 00:24:57,560 I just let them roam wild 501 00:24:57,560 --> 00:24:59,560 Yeah, the people are dreaming 502 00:24:59,560 --> 00:25:01,760 I'm just living my life 503 00:25:01,760 --> 00:25:03,920 I should really be sleeping 504 00:25:03,920 --> 00:25:06,560 But I only come out at night 505 00:25:06,560 --> 00:25:08,640 I only come out at night 506 00:25:08,640 --> 00:25:10,600 I only come out at night 507 00:25:10,600 --> 00:25:12,400 I only come out at night. 508 00:25:14,160 --> 00:25:16,000 LOUD CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 509 00:25:21,960 --> 00:25:24,800 Incredible! That was insane. 510 00:25:24,800 --> 00:25:26,480 Been keeping that quiet. 511 00:25:26,480 --> 00:25:27,920 Thanks so much for saving us. 512 00:25:27,920 --> 00:25:29,840 Sorry, I thought the air-con was a bee. 513 00:25:29,840 --> 00:25:33,000 The Palais is quite literally the hottest place in town. 514 00:25:33,000 --> 00:25:36,600 My waitress, Tyra, served me the best curry I've ever tasted 515 00:25:36,600 --> 00:25:40,240 and then got up on stage to sing with the voice of an angel. 516 00:25:40,240 --> 00:25:42,440 The perfect accompaniment to a heavenly cheesecake. 517 00:25:42,440 --> 00:25:44,080 Five stars. Get here now. 518 00:25:45,160 --> 00:25:47,520 Five stars. And she liked my curry. 519 00:25:47,520 --> 00:25:49,560 She liked my cheesecake. She liked my singing! 520 00:25:49,560 --> 00:25:52,760 And not a single mention of Girls Here First. 521 00:25:52,760 --> 00:25:54,800 Well done, Miri. 522 00:25:54,800 --> 00:25:56,480 Did I mention I love that top? 523 00:26:00,720 --> 00:26:02,080 I need that girl. 524 00:26:12,000 --> 00:26:13,960 People always talk about 525 00:26:13,960 --> 00:26:16,240 Hey oh, hey oh, hey oh 526 00:26:16,240 --> 00:26:18,400 All the things that they're about 527 00:26:18,400 --> 00:26:20,680 Hey oh, hey oh, hey oh 528 00:26:20,680 --> 00:26:24,680 Write it on a piece of paper 529 00:26:24,680 --> 00:26:27,320 Got a feeling I'll see you later... 530 00:26:27,320 --> 00:26:29,400 Car park karaoke! 531 00:26:29,400 --> 00:26:32,640 Mum's going to kill Nate if he crashes that car. 532 00:26:32,640 --> 00:26:34,880 And if it's good let's just get something cooking... 533 00:26:34,880 --> 00:26:36,760 Chloe, you're a genius. 534 00:26:36,760 --> 00:26:38,040 I really think I might be. 535 00:26:39,840 --> 00:26:44,000 I'm feeling some connection to the things you do 536 00:26:44,000 --> 00:26:46,000 You do, you do 537 00:26:46,000 --> 00:26:48,160 I don't know what it is 538 00:26:48,160 --> 00:26:50,240 That makes me feel like this 539 00:26:50,240 --> 00:26:52,560 I don't know who you are 540 00:26:52,560 --> 00:26:57,640 But you must be some kind of superstar 541 00:26:57,640 --> 00:27:01,960 Cos you got all eyes on you no matter where you are 542 00:27:01,960 --> 00:27:04,320 You just make me want to play 543 00:27:04,320 --> 00:27:06,440 Baby, take a look around 544 00:27:06,440 --> 00:27:08,560 Hey oh, hey oh, hey oh 545 00:27:08,560 --> 00:27:10,880 Everybody's getting down 546 00:27:10,880 --> 00:27:12,960 Hey oh, hey oh, hey oh 547 00:27:12,960 --> 00:27:16,920 Deal with all the problems later Later 548 00:27:16,920 --> 00:27:19,640 Bad girls on their best behaviour 549 00:27:19,640 --> 00:27:21,240 Hey oh, hey oh, hey oh 550 00:27:21,240 --> 00:27:23,200 There's something about you 551 00:27:23,200 --> 00:27:25,040 Let's keep it moving 552 00:27:25,040 --> 00:27:29,360 And if it's good let's just get something cooking... 553 00:27:29,360 --> 00:27:31,680 Someone's enjoying themselves. 554 00:27:33,040 --> 00:27:36,680 I'm feeling some connection to the things you do 555 00:27:36,680 --> 00:27:38,400 You do, you do 556 00:27:38,400 --> 00:27:40,360 I don't know what it is 557 00:27:40,360 --> 00:27:42,760 That makes me feel like this 558 00:27:42,760 --> 00:27:44,920 I don't know who you are 559 00:27:44,920 --> 00:27:49,600 But you must be some kind of superstar 560 00:27:49,600 --> 00:27:54,040 Cos you got all eyes on you no matter where you are 561 00:27:54,040 --> 00:27:56,320 You just make me want to 562 00:27:56,320 --> 00:27:58,680 Make your move 563 00:27:58,680 --> 00:28:01,400 Can't we get a little closer? 564 00:28:01,400 --> 00:28:05,840 You rock it just like you're supposed to 565 00:28:05,840 --> 00:28:11,760 Hey, girl, I ain't got nothing more to say 566 00:28:11,760 --> 00:28:13,520 You just make me want to 567 00:28:13,520 --> 00:28:15,360 I don't know what it is 568 00:28:15,360 --> 00:28:17,600 That makes me feel like this 569 00:28:17,600 --> 00:28:19,760 I don't know who you are 570 00:28:19,760 --> 00:28:24,520 But you must be some kind of superstar 571 00:28:24,520 --> 00:28:29,280 Cos you got all eyes on you no matter where you are 572 00:28:29,280 --> 00:28:31,960 You just make me want to play. 573 00:28:33,720 --> 00:28:35,720 HE HONKS HORN RHYTHMICALLY 41317

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