All language subtitles for Abbott Elementary s01e02 Light Bulb.eng

- Ten seconds!
- Ooh. Alright.

Ooh.

Ah.

Oh, we love "Action News".

We get in early just to watch it.

It just calms you down after
wanting to take a wrench

to someone's side mirror in traffic.

But the Philadelphia
region continues to suffer

temperatures in the mid-90s

with the heat index approaching 100...

Now, I'm a proud,
married, Christian woman,

and I love my husband.

But there's something
about that Jim Gardner.

That non-regional diction.

We haven't seen anything like this...

It is so important
to support and acknowledge

local journalism, okay?
There's no agenda here.

This is... This is on the
ground, in the streets,

powerful stuff.

Wouldn't want to see
that dog in traffic.

Yes, Jim.

I like the news, because
that's when I can say

whatever I want and
nobody asks any questions.

Taking a personal day. Going
fishing with my friends.

Anyways, toilet paper's in the closet.

I saw Jim Gardner once, at the Chipotle.

Ooh, he ordered a bowl so handsomely.

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? I be in and out of town with my bros ?

? Still wylin' on these hoes ?

? They the cons, we the pros ?

- Tariq, oh, my God. That's...
- That's it. That's a little sample.

That is so good. And you
recorded that last night?

Yeah, yeah. Did it in like 15 minutes.

- It's nothing. Yeah. Super fast.
- Wow.

Tariq is my boyfriend of over 10 years,

and he's been a music artist
since we were in high school.

Clearly, he's very, very good.

Um, all of his TikToks go viral,

which nowadays, is the true
mark of a great musician.

I'll be home kinda late
tonight 'cause I got a show.

I sold out the King's Lounge.

- Stop.
- Yeah.

- Oh, my goodness!
- Yeah.

- I'm so proud of you!
- Thank you.

- Maybe I could come.
- Oh, no, no, no.

You can't come, 'cause they
got a strict capacity thing.

And it's 15 people.

So if you come, then it's 16,

and then it's a fire hazard,
and then they shut it down.

But look. You wanna do dinner tonight?

I'll be home around 10.
I'll bring you Bahama Breeze.

- That is my favorite.
- I know. I know.

- That's my favorite! Okay.
- I know. Yeah.

- Alright. Alright.
- Alright, baby.

Ooh, you got that seat far up!

- You know I'm short.
- Damn. Okay. Ahh.

Alright, baby, I gotta get goin'.

I'm hungry as hell, and
although it is that hunger

that keeps me going,
I gotta eat something.

Okay. Well, why don't you just
take my breakfast sandwich?

- Huh?
- Yeah. I'll get something at school.

- Are you sure, baby?
- Yeah. I'll get something in there.

- Oh, thank you so much.
- You're welcome.

I love you. I love you, too.

Yeah.

Um, look, we didn't get
to discuss this last night

because you were making the hits, but...

our rent is going up, so
we need to redo the budget.

- Mm-hmm.
- I left that, uh,

bill-organizer thing on the fridge.

- Mm-hmm. Yeah. I'll get to it.
- Okay.

Yeah, but, no, I was just
thinking, like, you'd get to it

kind of soon because
my name's on the lease

and we were already late on rent once.

Oh, I got you, baby. Can we
talk about it later, though?

It's not even 8:00 in
the morning, and you know

I don't even wake up till, like,
noon o'clock in the morning.

Yeah. Could you just look
at it, though, you think?

I'll get to it. I promise, baby.

- Okay.
- Okay?

- Alright. I love you.
- Love you, too.

- Thanks for the sandwich.
- You're welcome.

Mmm.

Melina, what's wrong?

I don't want to walk down
the hallway, Ms. Janine.

It's scary.

I don't want to go to school.

What... Hey, Mr. Johnson.

These lights have been
going on and off for weeks.

Are you gonna do anything about them?

The kids don't even wanna walk in.

Above my pay grade, Janine.

I make most electrical things work

with a makeshift system
I've had since '92.

For this, we gotta
wait on an electrician.

- But...
- Goin' fishin'.

I'll get to it.

Don't worry, Melina.

I actually am going to get to it,

unlike janitors and boyfriends.

Huh?

Just... Come on.

Whose branzino is this?

That is a very powerfully smelling fish

- to put in a shared fridge.
- Don't touch it.

I'm making it tonight
at my cousin Annette's.

She thinks she's the
best cook in the family.

I'm gonna show her in
a nonthreatening way.

I'm-a look cuter than her, too.

Guys, the lights in the back
hallway have been out for weeks.

- Thank you for the update.
- What are you wearing?

And we need to do
something about it. Okay?

Uh, uh, Melina, from your class...

Yeah, she was afraid to
come to school this morning.

Said it looked like "The Shining,"

and I don't even get how
she knows that reference.

- She loves "The Shining."
- It's a classic movie.

This isn't okay, alright? And
I already talked to Mr. Johnson,

and he said there isn't
anything he can do.

What do you want us to do about it?

It can't be hard. It's just
screwing in a few new bulbs.

Janine, just worry about
what can be controlled.

Exactly. All we can do
on a hot day like this

is our own jobs, anyway.

I know that's right! Why is it February

and hotter than
the devil's booty-hole outside?

Climate change.

We are living in the middle
of its disastrous effects.

The permafrost in Russia...

Nerd.

Ava, can someone from the city

come and check on
the back-hallway lights?

Girl, no. Do I look
like the Kool-Aid Man?

I don't have enough juice to manipulate

the inner workings of city hall.

They'll probably come in the summer.

- In the summer?
- Tough break.

Want some egg-white bites?

No. I don't have time to eat.

They're just egg-white
bites. You microwave them.

See, I just can't accept this.

You know, they didn't
see those kids' faces.

It was like they walked into
The Haunted Mansion at Disney,

which is a very scary ride, by the way.

I don't care what people say.

Okay, so, we went over
the days of the week. Now we...

Alright, baby, sit down.

Um... it's 9:00.

Word.

Uh, school starts earlier than... that.

Look, I know you're just a sub,

but these kids need to
be in their seats by 8:00.

- It's a school requirement.
- Understood.

Sixth time in two weeks
that kid's been late.

Seems like a drop in
a bucket, but then...

that bucket overflows and
everything gets sticky.

We don't want to get sticky, do we?

Y'all are getting this, right?!

Oh, um, hey, Mrs. Howard,
can I get some advice?

I was gonna ask Janine,
but she seems busy.

- Oh, sure. Come on in.
- Thanks.

- Okay.
- Have a seat.

Mm-hmm.

Y-Yeah. Yeah.

So, one of my students
has been coming in late...

9:00, to be exact...
For the last week or so.

Did you talk to the parent?

No. No. I'm a sub. I don't want to be

mixing it up with parents.
It's unnecessary.

Sweetheart, this isn't happy hour.

You are the child's teacher.

- Which child is it?
- Uh, Williams.

Um, Joel Williams.

Okay. I know that family.

Oh, listen, I've got to go
pick my kids up from the gym,

so why don't you meet
me during my free time,

which is my nail
appointment during lunch.

Um, I was gonna eat in my car.
I brought a sandwich from home.

Okay. Then bring your little
Nissan sandwich with you.

The more senior teachers
are just used to giving in,

but I, however, am young, sprightly,

and know where they keep the ladder.

Forgot I was afraid of ladders.

That was just my stomach.

Okay.

Oh. Oh, look at this.

It was just a loose wire.

Ooh!

Oh, God. Can someone
please help me down?

And why would we do that, since
you clearly caused this situation?

Okay. I didn't know doing this
would cause all the power to go out.

Well, the power is not all out.

It's on in some places
and off in others.

- It's off in my room.
- On in the gym.

Yeah, it's off in my room.

Thank God we got the A/C, or
we'd all be meltin' already.

Okay, best thing to do in these
situations is just stay calm and...

Okay! This is it, y'all! The end times!

It's three months early,
but it's happening!

Aah! Don't shake the ladder!

Gregory is the only person that can
stay in my bunker, so stop asking.

Hell yeah, I'm a doomsday prepper.

Why wouldn't I be?

I don't know why more people aren't.

Have you seen "Train to Busan"?
With the fast-ass zombies?

That day is coming.
That day soon come.

Ava, it is just a partial power outage.

Alright. Listen up, everybody...

- Listen to Barbara, y'all!
- Are you kidding me?

This is what we're gonna do...

Everybody without power,
please, head to the gym.

- Head.
- We will conduct classes there

until this is all fixed.

It is not ideal, but it will work.

You heard her. Let's go.

Guys... Guys, I-I just want
to say, I-I'm sorry, everybody.

I just thought if I could
get up here and get this done,

then we wouldn't have to wait and...

And look where it landed us, baby girl.

Yeah, how'd that work out for you?

Everybody, please, head to the gym.

We've got bigger fish to fry now.

Oh, Jesus! My branzino!

Everybody out of the way!
Out of the way!

If someone could please help me?

I feel like I'm one
wobble away from death.

A-Alright. Okay. I got you.

- Okay. Hi. Thank you.
- We good.

Give me your hand. Take your time.

- Okay.
- Whenever you're ready.

- Okay. Am I doing it?
- No.

- Let's go to a count of three.
- Okay.

One, two...

three.

One more time.

And it's pointing to the number...

- Right here. Thank you.
- Four!

This is all my fault.

Yeah, you probably shouldn't
have tried to do the job

of a newly graduated DeVry
student, but this is okay.

_

I made this mess, and
I need to fix this.

Okay, but fix this how?

It seems very outside of your skill set.

You should probably just wait
for somebody to get to it...

I don't want to wait
for someone to get to it.

You know, our children have
needs that deserve to be met.

And I'm going to fix this.

Nothing is going to get in my way.

What if you have to
climb another ladder?

Those seem very tricky for you.

No. Not today.

Aren't you going to lunch, Janine?

Uh, no. I'm gonna stay and help
the lunch ladies with lunch.

The lunch ladies don't like you.

She always coming in the kitchen
saying "hello" and whatnot.

It's unsanitary.

Is that what you're really doing?

Yes! And maybe trying to
get the lights back on.

Would you give that a rest?
What do you want?

To make the whole school blow up?

No. Plus, I can't.

Luckily, the school was built as
a bomb shelter in World War II,

so...

Let it go.

Okay. I will.

You're not gonna let it go, are you?

No, I'm not gonna let
it go, Jacob, okay?

I need to right my wrong.

Okay. Well, count me out.

I never counted you in.

Well, then count me in,

because I don't have any lunch plans.

Okay. Come on.

Okay.

Hi. Can I help you?

Oh, I'm just here to talk to her.

You need your nails done to sit.

What color are you doing?

Um... clear?

No loitering and no clear.

Okay. Blue. On one nail.

Thank you.

Can we talk now, please?

We could, but there
isn't much more to say

other than you need
to talk to the parent.

Look, I understand. There
just has to be another way

to do this other than
awkwardly talking to the parent

first thing in the morning.

Well, try it this way...

You could talk to your
student's parent right now.

Hold on. Now, did you call her?

I did not.

But when you said it was Joel,
I remembered that his mother

comes here every two
weeks to get her nails done

just like I do.

- Hey, Mrs. Howard.
- Hello, Amber.

Aren't you my son's teacher?

Yes.

Getting your nails done?

Word.

Well, you've seen all the properties.

Are you going to flip it or ship it?

This is just like the one in my
apartment. This is gonna be easy.

Me and Tariq have to go in that
thing like three times a month.

Maybe you should move.

Yeah.

Tariq says he is
"practicing" his credit score.

Apparently, 380 isn't a good...

Unh.

Oh, no. "Don't touch.
Not even a little bit."

Uh, okay. What's that say?

"End of the Road"? "It's
So Hard to Say Goodbye"?

What? "Motownphi..."

These are Boyz II Men songs. Why?

It's ironic, 'cause
I'm On Bended Knee.

Heh. Okay.

Oh, God. Why is that one hot?

Uh... Mm, try this one.

We're going to...

N-o-o-o-o!

Can you give me something bold?

Something that... starts a conversation.

So, Amber...

Nice to meet you.

Yeah, we met already,
but nice to meet you, too.

So, um, your son, Joel...

You've been, um, bringing
him to school at 9:00.

School starts at 8:00.

Is there a reason for this?

Well, nosy, I start
my shift at my job at 9:30,

so it's easy for me to
drop him off before that

and go straight to work instead
of going home or whatever.

Right, right.

Can I get some rhinestones that say,

"I'm not afraid of
awkward interactions"?

Literally or metaphorically?

'Cause I can do that design.
It'll just be $50 extra.

Fifty...

Well, I hear what
you're saying, um, Amber.

Y-Your son needs to
be at school at 8:00.

He's missing a lot of vital learning.

Word? I thought y'all just be
playing with blocks and stuff.

No. This isn't daycare.
By the time he comes in,

we're already working on
primary reading and math.

He's always struggling to keep up.

Oh.

I didn't know that.

Yeah, I would hate for him

to fall behind and have
to retake the grade.

I don't want that, but
that's as much up to you

as it is up to me.

I get you.

I don't want him to fall behind.

He's a smart kid.

Very.

Okay.

I'll bring him at 8:00 from now on.

It's kinda nice.

Word.

- Ooh.
- What in the... What's going on?

- What in the world?
- It's so hot! I'm gonna frizz!

Janine, what did you do?!

Lookin' like who shot John.

Barbara, look, I know you told
me to let it go, but I couldn't.

Jacob helped me open the breaker.

It was a chance to support
a strong Black woman.

The breaker?! Janine!
You can't do this stuff!

What had you come to work
today and lose your mind?

Look, I... I just have...

- Oh. Ooh. Okay.
- I feel lightheaded.

- Are you okay?
- Did you eat today?

Because I know you didn't have lunch.

And you didn't have any breakfast.

Okay. We're losing her. Do I
have your consent to slap you?

- Oh!
- There she goes. She's out.

- Um...
- Y'all feel this heat?

Oh, my God! She pale like a zombie!

You know, they eat
the hottest people first.

Let me back my tasty ass up.

Okay, I'm gonna get some
water out of the fridge.

Uh, hopefully it's still cold!

Oh, my God! My branzino!
Barb, excuse me!

I'll be back! She'll be okay!

Where's my class?
Is... Is everyone okay?

Obviously, everyone's not okay.

You're in the nurse's office.

But everybody else is fine.

They are so happy.

He's climbing again.

Oh, look who's back in
the land of the living.

Who opened the fire hydrant?

Well, as Melissa would
say, snitches get stitches.

That is correct, but
I am not talking to you

on account of you killing my branzino.

Ooh. What's going on here?

So that's it, huh?
I, uh, gave it my all,

passed out, and ruined the school day?

Oh, you tanked. You tanked, Janine.

You took the whole school down
with you. It was impressive.

Look. I know. I should've stopped.

I'm sorry. I just felt so bad

when I saw that look on
Melina's face this morning.

You don't think it kills us to
see those faces in the morning?

What, are we made of stone?

You're not the first person
to feel things, kid. We care.

How do you and Barbara stop
yourselves from caring too much,

if that's a thing?

Because it's the opposite.

We care so much, we refuse to burn out.

If we burn out, who's
here for these kids?

That's why you gotta
take care of yourself.

What is with you today, anyway?

You... You're normally bananas, but...

I don't know. Just some
stuff at home, I think.

Oh. Okay.

See, that's the other thing
me and Barbara learned.

All that at-home stuff... You gotta...

Leave it right at that door.

Otherwise, you open up a whole nother

Panera's box of problems.

I think you mean Pandora's box.

No, I'm pretty sure it's Panera's box.

Thank you for your help
earlier, Mrs. Howard.

I feel like a better communicator.

Mm.

Well, if you're gonna
keep doing this job,

awkward interactions come with it,

so you've got to learn
how to say what you need

to get what you want.

Mm-hmm.

Hey, Jaden, don't drink that.

- Mnh-mnh.
- Don't drink that. No.

Hey, I'm not here right now.
Leave a message after the beat.

? This Tariq ?

Hey, Tariq. Um, listen.

You need to look at the budget tonight.

No more waiting. No more practicing.

Tonight.

- Hey.
- Hey.

- Hey.
- Have you eaten?

Oh. No. The, um, lunch lady
gave me that can of peaches,

but no can opener, so, no.

Alright, well, you wanna go
get something to eat? With me?

Oh.

I was gonna wait for my boyfriend

to finish his show to eat...

but... no.

I'm hungry now, so I
should eat now, right?

That's typically how hunger works, yeah.

Right! Normal people
eat at normal times.

Like... 4:00.

Yeah. All true.

So let's go eat.

Let's. Okay.

Oh. This is crooked.

Oh, my God. Please.
I'll get to it tomorrow.

No. I got it.

There.

- Oh, hey, guys! What's up?
- Hey.

We're just going to
get something to eat.

- Oh. Great. I'll join.
- Oh.

After-school crew!

Ooh. "After-school crew." I like that.

You touched the lights,
didn't you, Janine?

Yes.

Good thing I got me a system.

? I'll make love to you ?

? Like you want me to ?

? And I'll hold you tight ?

? Baby, all through the night ?

Here he is. Five minutes early.

Now I have to find something
to do before my shift starts.

Maybe I can get through half a movie.

Well, I'm happy he's here. Thank you.

Thank you, actually.

It's nice to know he
has a teacher who cares.

Just doing my job.

Well, you're doing it well.

Mm! You sure follow orders.

Just doing my job.

"Well, you doing it well."

Thank you.

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