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1
00:00:01,269 --> 00:00:04,436
(eerie ambient tones)
2
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(eerie music)
3
00:01:36,063 --> 00:01:38,563
- Baby, when did you get here?
4
00:01:47,833 --> 00:01:52,701
(dramatic music)
(gasping)
5
00:01:52,701 --> 00:01:55,701
(upbeat rock music)
6
00:02:01,681 --> 00:02:05,098
♫ I've got my eye on you
7
00:02:05,933 --> 00:02:09,350
♫ I've got my eye on you
8
00:02:10,592 --> 00:02:14,161
♫ And I'm up to here, too
9
00:02:14,161 --> 00:02:18,328
♫ You're foolin' around,
gettin' blood on my shoes
10
00:02:27,931 --> 00:02:32,173
♫ I've set my sights on you
11
00:02:32,173 --> 00:02:35,840
♫ I've set my sights on you
12
00:02:36,762 --> 00:02:40,381
♫ Gotten out of my tomb
13
00:02:40,381 --> 00:02:44,548
♫ So don't look around,
I've got nothing to lose ♫
14
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(gunshot)
15
00:03:12,594 --> 00:03:14,104
- Aloha.
16
00:03:14,104 --> 00:03:18,154
I see you've met Rachel Worth, poor thing.
17
00:03:18,154 --> 00:03:20,693
Can you believe it's her wedding day?
18
00:03:20,693 --> 00:03:23,173
Certainly not a very auspicious start.
19
00:03:23,173 --> 00:03:26,222
A bride needs something
borrowed, something blue,
20
00:03:26,222 --> 00:03:28,342
but certainly not something dead.
21
00:03:28,342 --> 00:03:30,264
I guess the silver lining in all of this
22
00:03:30,264 --> 00:03:34,454
is the corpse is not the
man she's planning to marry.
23
00:03:34,454 --> 00:03:37,074
But with her ceremony on a private beach
24
00:03:37,074 --> 00:03:40,653
near Waikiki looming in six hours,
25
00:03:40,653 --> 00:03:41,984
she best fix this little hiccup that's
26
00:03:41,984 --> 00:03:43,674
threatening her big day.
27
00:03:43,674 --> 00:03:45,754
Otherwise it could very
well be a whole new
28
00:03:45,754 --> 00:03:49,421
meaning to the phrase
'til death do us part.
29
00:03:50,542 --> 00:03:54,186
(water splashing)
30
00:03:54,186 --> 00:03:55,936
- Okay, phone, phone.
31
00:03:58,842 --> 00:04:01,009
Where's my fucking phone?!
32
00:04:03,293 --> 00:04:05,543
(mumbling)
33
00:04:16,154 --> 00:04:18,821
(phone dialing)
34
00:04:21,313 --> 00:04:23,753
(sobbing) Cam!
35
00:04:23,753 --> 00:04:24,836
Cam, it's me!
36
00:04:25,685 --> 00:04:26,754
- Babe, are you okay?
37
00:04:26,754 --> 00:04:28,413
I can't hear you, there's no reception,
38
00:04:28,413 --> 00:04:30,304
and the music's too loud!
39
00:04:30,304 --> 00:04:31,994
Listen, my bachelor
party's still goin' on,
40
00:04:31,994 --> 00:04:36,899
but I promise, don't worry,
I'll be sober by the morning.
41
00:04:36,899 --> 00:04:37,816
- Cam, Cam!
42
00:04:38,976 --> 00:04:41,656
- Really? That's funny?
43
00:04:41,656 --> 00:04:45,274
You made out with a tranny last night.
44
00:04:45,274 --> 00:04:47,441
(sobbing)
45
00:04:50,744 --> 00:04:54,077
(upbeat flamenco music)
46
00:04:58,892 --> 00:05:02,142
(groaning and sighing)
47
00:06:44,519 --> 00:06:48,167
(heavy breathing)
48
00:06:48,167 --> 00:06:49,549
Please tell me we still
get to have sex like
49
00:06:49,549 --> 00:06:50,847
that after we're married?
50
00:06:50,847 --> 00:06:53,521
- (chuckling) We better.
51
00:06:53,521 --> 00:06:56,037
It's a husband's duty to please his woman.
52
00:06:56,037 --> 00:06:57,120
- Oh, really?
53
00:06:58,485 --> 00:06:59,997
I can't believe by this time tomorrow
54
00:06:59,997 --> 00:07:02,845
we'll be Mr. and Mrs. Cam Englehart.
55
00:07:02,845 --> 00:07:04,557
- Finally, I thought we were gonna have to
56
00:07:04,557 --> 00:07:06,705
get you new business cards made up.
57
00:07:06,705 --> 00:07:10,037
Cam Englehart, Corporate
Attorney, Commitmentphobe.
58
00:07:10,037 --> 00:07:12,305
- Well, after tonight, I'm all yours.
59
00:07:12,305 --> 00:07:14,888
- Ah, just remember, we agreed.
60
00:07:16,015 --> 00:07:17,205
One lap dance.
61
00:07:17,205 --> 00:07:19,317
- Yeah, about that, how 'bout
62
00:07:19,317 --> 00:07:21,234
one lap dance and a BJ?
63
00:07:22,660 --> 00:07:24,485
I'm a lawyer, I negotiate!
64
00:07:24,485 --> 00:07:25,318
It's what I do!
65
00:07:25,318 --> 00:07:27,495
- It's also tacky.
66
00:07:27,495 --> 00:07:30,445
Oh, I hope they don't get a stripper.
67
00:07:30,445 --> 00:07:33,917
I just wanna sit by the pool and relax.
68
00:07:33,917 --> 00:07:35,000
And miss you.
69
00:07:38,482 --> 00:07:40,085
Do I really have to go do this whole
70
00:07:40,085 --> 00:07:41,034
bachelorette party thing?
71
00:07:41,034 --> 00:07:44,655
- Yes, my sister's gone
all out, you have to go.
72
00:07:44,655 --> 00:07:45,785
(knocking on door)
73
00:07:45,785 --> 00:07:49,700
Which is why I told 'em where to find you.
74
00:07:49,700 --> 00:07:52,665
- [Sharon] You're not even dressed yet!
75
00:07:52,665 --> 00:07:54,335
What is this?
76
00:07:54,335 --> 00:07:55,376
Party time!
77
00:07:55,376 --> 00:07:58,058
- Check-in is at 3 and I
want maximum pool time,
78
00:07:58,058 --> 00:08:01,842
but you, just, stop
molesting my bro, okay?
79
00:08:01,842 --> 00:08:02,997
- Okay, coming!
80
00:08:02,997 --> 00:08:05,580
- [Daphne] Happy birthday, Cam!
81
00:08:07,317 --> 00:08:09,364
- [Cam] I'll see you later.
- [Rachel] Okay!
82
00:08:09,364 --> 00:08:13,294
Hi, this is Rachel Worth,
I'm one of the women
83
00:08:13,294 --> 00:08:16,443
staying at your vacation
rental, there's a problem
84
00:08:16,443 --> 00:08:18,582
that I really need to talk to you about,
85
00:08:18,582 --> 00:08:22,214
so if you get this message,
please call me back.
86
00:08:22,214 --> 00:08:24,562
Here, at the house.
87
00:08:24,562 --> 00:08:26,243
Um, thank you.
88
00:08:26,243 --> 00:08:28,142
Okay, call me back. Okay, bye.
89
00:08:28,142 --> 00:08:32,888
(waves crashing)
(women cheering)
90
00:08:32,888 --> 00:08:35,638
- This is the entertainment area.
91
00:08:37,122 --> 00:08:39,054
Fire pit over there.
92
00:08:39,054 --> 00:08:40,294
- Trampoline, we get to use that, right?
93
00:08:40,294 --> 00:08:41,943
- Yeah, yeah!
94
00:08:41,943 --> 00:08:45,294
You got a famous trampoline,
if that trampoline could talk.
95
00:08:45,294 --> 00:08:46,785
The jacuzzi and the pool's temperature
96
00:08:46,785 --> 00:08:48,465
you can adjust inside.
97
00:08:48,465 --> 00:08:50,635
- Daphne pees in the pool,
just to let you know,
98
00:08:50,635 --> 00:08:51,715
is that gonna be a problem?
99
00:08:51,715 --> 00:08:52,795
- I do not!
100
00:08:52,795 --> 00:08:54,134
- Is there a pool boy?
101
00:08:54,134 --> 00:08:55,155
- There is a pool boy.
102
00:08:55,155 --> 00:08:55,988
- Is he hot?
103
00:08:55,988 --> 00:08:57,454
- He is really good-looking.
104
00:08:57,454 --> 00:08:58,537
- Women only?
105
00:08:59,683 --> 00:09:02,105
- The beach is a quarter mile that way,
106
00:09:02,105 --> 00:09:05,463
and the bar's fully stocked
with all the best liquor.
107
00:09:05,463 --> 00:09:07,703
I myself don't drink, but
I hear it's really good.
108
00:09:07,703 --> 00:09:09,515
- This is a great porn house.
109
00:09:09,515 --> 00:09:11,974
- Oh, you've shot here?
(laughter)
110
00:09:11,974 --> 00:09:14,403
- Anyway, that's about it,
so if you need anything else,
111
00:09:14,403 --> 00:09:15,774
call me on this number.
112
00:09:15,774 --> 00:09:16,743
- Thank you so much.
113
00:09:16,743 --> 00:09:18,963
- I'm gonna get out of your hair now.
114
00:09:18,963 --> 00:09:20,403
Don't do anything I wouldn't do.
115
00:09:20,403 --> 00:09:23,273
- Now, exactly what might that be?
116
00:09:23,273 --> 00:09:27,495
- (chuckling) Oh my God, I love her.
117
00:09:27,495 --> 00:09:29,183
- Congratulations on your nuptials.
118
00:09:29,183 --> 00:09:30,075
- Thank you so much.
119
00:09:30,075 --> 00:09:31,143
- Enjoy, ladies!
120
00:09:31,143 --> 00:09:34,343
- Cheers, to Rachel's marriage to Cam!
121
00:09:34,343 --> 00:09:35,705
- Woo, good times!
122
00:09:35,705 --> 00:09:36,788
- Good times.
123
00:09:39,185 --> 00:09:42,675
- Rachel! Kim, Daphne, come here!
124
00:09:42,675 --> 00:09:45,683
- What the fuck is it
with her and trampolines?
125
00:09:45,683 --> 00:09:47,374
- Tramps love tramps, honey.
126
00:09:47,374 --> 00:09:48,654
- That's good.
127
00:09:48,654 --> 00:09:49,966
- [Rachel] Right?
- [Kim] Yeah, score.
128
00:09:49,966 --> 00:09:51,387
- [Rachel] Thank you.
129
00:09:51,387 --> 00:09:53,220
- So, are you nervous?
130
00:09:54,158 --> 00:09:55,311
- About tomorrow?
131
00:09:55,311 --> 00:09:57,817
No, are you kiddin', I love that man.
132
00:09:57,817 --> 00:09:59,686
- I still don't understand
why, of all the women in
133
00:09:59,686 --> 00:10:03,210
the world, he chose me
to settle down with.
134
00:10:03,210 --> 00:10:05,006
Not that I'm complaining, mind you.
135
00:10:05,006 --> 00:10:06,923
- That was so much fun.
136
00:10:10,000 --> 00:10:10,833
- Jesus.
137
00:10:10,833 --> 00:10:12,438
- Well...
138
00:10:12,438 --> 00:10:15,636
I, for one, will never allow
myself to get tied down.
139
00:10:15,636 --> 00:10:17,049
- We all know you're
the one that loves to do
140
00:10:17,049 --> 00:10:18,947
the tying down, sweetie.
141
00:10:18,947 --> 00:10:21,027
I've seen your collection
of whips and ball gags.
142
00:10:21,027 --> 00:10:23,997
- Bunnies and rabbits, and
stripper heels, and tutus.
143
00:10:23,997 --> 00:10:24,830
- Tutus?
144
00:10:26,318 --> 00:10:28,577
It's not like I was in
a rush to get married,
145
00:10:28,577 --> 00:10:31,244
but when I met Cam, I just knew.
146
00:10:33,387 --> 00:10:34,837
- I'm sorry.
147
00:10:34,837 --> 00:10:37,170
I'll get something for that.
148
00:10:38,169 --> 00:10:39,467
- Is she gonna be okay?
149
00:10:39,467 --> 00:10:42,037
- Yeah, she'll be fine.
150
00:10:42,037 --> 00:10:43,787
It's ancient history.
151
00:10:44,987 --> 00:10:47,758
(waves crashing)
152
00:10:47,758 --> 00:10:50,258
(eerie music)
153
00:11:20,889 --> 00:11:25,230
(groaning)
(gasping)
154
00:11:25,230 --> 00:11:26,670
- [Rachel] Daphne?
- [Daphne] Yeah?
155
00:11:26,670 --> 00:11:29,329
- Daphne, come on, honey, wake up!
156
00:11:29,329 --> 00:11:30,469
- Where's my hat?
157
00:11:30,469 --> 00:11:32,589
- You must've fallen asleep out here.
158
00:11:32,589 --> 00:11:34,259
Daphne, come on, honey, wake up!
159
00:11:34,259 --> 00:11:36,329
- What, Rachel?
160
00:11:36,329 --> 00:11:38,419
- Daphne, what happened last night?
161
00:11:38,419 --> 00:11:40,399
I remember having drinks by the pool,
162
00:11:40,399 --> 00:11:42,989
and then everything after
that is a complete blank.
163
00:11:42,989 --> 00:11:46,121
- Well, we had a pretty good
time, that's what happened!
164
00:11:46,121 --> 00:11:47,379
- Do you know where Sharon and Kim are?
165
00:11:47,379 --> 00:11:48,470
- They're not in their rooms?
166
00:11:48,470 --> 00:11:49,521
- No.
167
00:11:49,521 --> 00:11:53,859
Okay, um, I need you to get
up and come with me, okay?
168
00:11:53,859 --> 00:11:56,139
Daphne, Daphne! Daphne!
169
00:11:56,139 --> 00:11:58,387
- Okay, I'm coming, okay, I'm coming.
170
00:11:58,387 --> 00:12:00,637
(groaning)
171
00:12:01,566 --> 00:12:04,899
- Come on, I have to show you something.
172
00:12:07,366 --> 00:12:10,622
- Oh Jesus, what is he doing here?
173
00:12:10,622 --> 00:12:12,177
- Who is he?
174
00:12:12,177 --> 00:12:13,922
- The stripper.
175
00:12:13,922 --> 00:12:15,505
Don't you remember?
176
00:12:27,481 --> 00:12:28,484
I think he's dead.
177
00:12:28,484 --> 00:12:29,317
- Yes!
178
00:12:29,317 --> 00:12:30,150
- Uh...
179
00:12:32,614 --> 00:12:33,944
What did you do?
180
00:12:33,944 --> 00:12:34,983
Did you two--
181
00:12:34,983 --> 00:12:37,756
- [Rachel] No!
- [Daphne] Rachel.
182
00:12:37,756 --> 00:12:38,703
- I don't think so.
183
00:12:38,703 --> 00:12:40,534
- Gosh, oh boy, this is bad.
184
00:12:40,534 --> 00:12:42,324
- Look at the mark on his neck.
185
00:12:42,324 --> 00:12:43,625
It looks like he was strangled.
186
00:12:43,625 --> 00:12:44,473
- Strangled?
187
00:12:44,473 --> 00:12:46,944
Somebody came in here and killed him?
188
00:12:46,944 --> 00:12:49,825
- So you remember him
showing up last night?
189
00:12:49,825 --> 00:12:52,783
- Of course I remember him.
190
00:12:52,783 --> 00:12:54,793
He was a surprise, but you were already
191
00:12:54,793 --> 00:12:56,284
pretty wasted by then.
192
00:12:56,284 --> 00:12:59,034
(waves crashing)
193
00:12:59,985 --> 00:13:02,144
- Hey, where are you going so fast?
194
00:13:02,144 --> 00:13:02,977
Come on!
195
00:13:04,004 --> 00:13:05,654
What's with the outfit?
196
00:13:05,654 --> 00:13:08,334
I thought you were coming
dressed as a policeman.
197
00:13:08,334 --> 00:13:10,004
- Yeah, the girls at the
last party got a little
198
00:13:10,004 --> 00:13:12,204
too excited, and by too excited I meant
199
00:13:12,204 --> 00:13:13,382
they ripped my uniform
'cause they couldn't
200
00:13:13,382 --> 00:13:15,462
wait to suck my dick, but, uh,
201
00:13:15,462 --> 00:13:16,452
I had to improvise.
202
00:13:16,452 --> 00:13:19,382
- I wonder kinda damage we're
gonna do to this uniform.
203
00:13:19,382 --> 00:13:21,222
- Yeah, we should get started, I'm hourly.
204
00:13:21,222 --> 00:13:22,782
- I like the suspenders.
205
00:13:22,782 --> 00:13:25,012
- Yeah, they're stretchy.
206
00:13:25,012 --> 00:13:26,022
- Hey, girls!
207
00:13:26,022 --> 00:13:28,687
(laughter)
208
00:13:28,687 --> 00:13:30,679
You smell somethin' burnin'?
209
00:13:30,679 --> 00:13:33,846
- [Daphne] The party's over here baby!
210
00:13:36,559 --> 00:13:39,808
- Who's that?
(cheering)
211
00:13:39,808 --> 00:13:40,808
Who is that?
212
00:13:41,959 --> 00:13:43,719
- [Sharon] Who is this?
213
00:13:43,719 --> 00:13:46,176
- [Stripper] There's a
spot for you right here!
214
00:13:46,176 --> 00:13:47,676
It's on the rocks!
215
00:13:49,219 --> 00:13:50,610
- I don't have to.
216
00:13:50,610 --> 00:13:52,631
- [Stripper] Oh girls,
take my clothes off,
217
00:13:52,631 --> 00:13:54,881
loosen up my buttons, baby!
218
00:13:56,319 --> 00:13:57,671
- That's what I'm talking about.
219
00:13:57,671 --> 00:13:59,090
- [Stripper] Oh, there
goes the suspenders!
220
00:13:59,090 --> 00:14:00,399
What's under here, I don't know,
221
00:14:00,399 --> 00:14:02,584
it might be a dick, oh,
222
00:14:02,584 --> 00:14:05,350
it's a dick, behind door one!
223
00:14:05,350 --> 00:14:06,398
- Oh my...
224
00:14:06,398 --> 00:14:09,731
(cheering and shouting)
225
00:14:12,518 --> 00:14:14,459
It's a teabag robot!
226
00:14:14,459 --> 00:14:17,518
From the future, oh,
I'm from the future to
227
00:14:17,518 --> 00:14:20,089
teabag the bachelorette!
228
00:14:20,089 --> 00:14:24,256
(Rachel screams)
(stripper cheers)
229
00:14:25,920 --> 00:14:27,753
It's the teabag robot!
230
00:14:32,979 --> 00:14:33,812
Bite it!
231
00:14:36,241 --> 00:14:37,739
- Okay, okay, okay!
232
00:14:37,739 --> 00:14:40,408
The fire is out, the fire is out!
233
00:14:40,408 --> 00:14:42,370
(laughing)
(waves crashing)
234
00:14:42,370 --> 00:14:44,620
- I can't recall any of it!
235
00:14:46,361 --> 00:14:49,028
What happened after we finished?
236
00:14:49,886 --> 00:14:51,321
- I thought he left.
237
00:14:51,321 --> 00:14:54,601
After the fight with Sharon...
238
00:14:54,601 --> 00:14:56,561
(waves crashing)
239
00:14:56,561 --> 00:14:58,700
- [Daphne] All right,
Rachel, come on now, honey.
240
00:14:58,700 --> 00:15:01,351
It's time for bed, you can do it.
241
00:15:01,351 --> 00:15:03,543
- Have you seen my hat? It's a rental.
242
00:15:03,543 --> 00:15:06,202
- No, but I see a really hot ass I'd
243
00:15:06,202 --> 00:15:07,879
love to be my patient.
244
00:15:07,879 --> 00:15:10,531
Hey, you ever done it on a trampoline?
245
00:15:10,531 --> 00:15:12,249
It's really awesome.
246
00:15:12,249 --> 00:15:14,749
- No thanks, I'm not into cougars.
247
00:15:14,749 --> 00:15:16,880
- Well, what good are you, too?
248
00:15:16,880 --> 00:15:18,920
- Yeah, but from here,
looks like it's time to
249
00:15:18,920 --> 00:15:20,670
learn the word botox.
250
00:15:21,569 --> 00:15:25,736
- You're a fucking asshole!
(glass breaks)
251
00:15:26,619 --> 00:15:27,619
- One dance.
252
00:15:29,203 --> 00:15:30,036
- I like a dance.
253
00:15:30,036 --> 00:15:34,119
- Come on, get up here,
get that hot ass up here.
254
00:15:35,190 --> 00:15:36,886
You're a saucy one!
255
00:15:36,886 --> 00:15:37,719
Yeah!
256
00:15:39,590 --> 00:15:42,599
Let me see that ass, let
me see that cute ass.
257
00:15:42,599 --> 00:15:44,432
Yeah, oh, grind on it.
258
00:15:45,451 --> 00:15:46,854
You feel that?
259
00:15:46,854 --> 00:15:51,059
Wakin' the monster, I wanna
have your mixed race baby.
260
00:15:51,059 --> 00:15:51,951
(screaming)
(water splashing)
261
00:15:51,951 --> 00:15:52,784
- Shit!
262
00:15:56,701 --> 00:15:58,221
I'd watch out for Sharon,
she caught her last
263
00:15:58,221 --> 00:16:00,770
boyfriend cheating, took
a crowbar to his head.
264
00:16:00,770 --> 00:16:03,040
He's just now starting
to remember his name.
265
00:16:03,040 --> 00:16:05,500
- If the dude's got no
memory of datin' that bitch,
266
00:16:05,500 --> 00:16:06,479
he's a lucky man.
267
00:16:06,479 --> 00:16:08,151
- I'm gonna fucking kill you!
268
00:16:08,151 --> 00:16:10,719
- You don't think Sharon...
269
00:16:10,719 --> 00:16:12,504
- We all know what she's capable of,
270
00:16:12,504 --> 00:16:14,359
remember what she did to poor Jason?
271
00:16:14,359 --> 00:16:16,671
- Hey hey hey, back with
the coffee and scones,
272
00:16:16,671 --> 00:16:18,588
hangover cures for all.
273
00:16:21,170 --> 00:16:23,219
(laughing)
274
00:16:23,219 --> 00:16:24,719
Is that who I think it is?
275
00:16:24,719 --> 00:16:26,850
- He's dead, Kim.
276
00:16:26,850 --> 00:16:27,683
- What?
277
00:16:28,541 --> 00:16:29,711
How?
278
00:16:29,711 --> 00:16:31,701
- We don't know.
279
00:16:31,701 --> 00:16:33,450
- Well, did you call the police?
280
00:16:33,450 --> 00:16:34,283
- No.
281
00:16:35,505 --> 00:16:36,951
Not yet.
282
00:16:36,951 --> 00:16:38,900
- Well why, we have to
call them right now!
283
00:16:38,900 --> 00:16:42,301
- No, wait, let's just take a beat.
284
00:16:42,301 --> 00:16:43,381
What if they arrest us?
285
00:16:43,381 --> 00:16:45,191
- Nobody's gonna get arrested!
286
00:16:45,191 --> 00:16:47,119
I mean, look at him!
287
00:16:47,119 --> 00:16:49,181
He probably pumped himself
full of so many steroids,
288
00:16:49,181 --> 00:16:50,759
his heart finally gave out!
289
00:16:50,759 --> 00:16:52,859
- I don't think this is drug related.
290
00:16:52,859 --> 00:16:56,026
Whoever killed him could've used this.
291
00:16:58,101 --> 00:16:59,351
- Jesus Christ.
292
00:17:00,559 --> 00:17:02,039
I mean, how did he get here?
293
00:17:02,039 --> 00:17:03,219
- I don't know!
294
00:17:03,219 --> 00:17:06,959
- She can't remember if she
had sex with him or not.
295
00:17:06,959 --> 00:17:09,421
- You had sex with this slimebag?
296
00:17:09,421 --> 00:17:10,588
- No, no, I...
297
00:17:11,850 --> 00:17:14,091
Would you stop saying that?
298
00:17:14,091 --> 00:17:16,249
- I can't believe this, we
really have to call the police.
299
00:17:16,249 --> 00:17:18,375
- Please just wait!
300
00:17:18,375 --> 00:17:20,481
Just give me a second to think!
301
00:17:20,481 --> 00:17:23,029
Oh God, it's my wedding
day, what if Cam finds out?
302
00:17:23,029 --> 00:17:24,539
- It's not a question of if he finds out,
303
00:17:24,539 --> 00:17:26,681
darling, he's going to find out.
304
00:17:26,681 --> 00:17:28,514
- Whose phone is this?
305
00:17:29,459 --> 00:17:31,470
- Mine, I've been looking
for it everywhere.
306
00:17:31,470 --> 00:17:33,070
(moaning)
307
00:17:33,070 --> 00:17:33,903
What?
308
00:17:36,649 --> 00:17:37,482
Oh God!
309
00:17:39,150 --> 00:17:40,983
- Yep. You fucked him.
310
00:17:42,689 --> 00:17:46,689
(comedic music)
- What the fuck?
311
00:18:08,447 --> 00:18:10,667
Where the hell is the coffee maker?
312
00:18:10,667 --> 00:18:14,547
I feel like I'm doing that
show Stomp inside my head.
313
00:18:14,547 --> 00:18:15,714
- Hey! Sharon!
314
00:18:17,198 --> 00:18:18,227
Did you do it?
315
00:18:18,227 --> 00:18:19,060
- Do what?
316
00:18:22,819 --> 00:18:24,069
- The stripper!
317
00:18:26,187 --> 00:18:28,020
- No, I didn't do him.
318
00:18:29,187 --> 00:18:30,647
Not for lack of trying.
319
00:18:30,647 --> 00:18:31,980
- Hey, hey, hey.
320
00:18:32,982 --> 00:18:34,399
Did you kill him?
321
00:18:37,369 --> 00:18:39,447
Yeah, he's here.
322
00:18:39,447 --> 00:18:41,655
He's pretty stiff, and I'm not talkin'
323
00:18:41,655 --> 00:18:42,671
about his cock, either.
324
00:18:42,671 --> 00:18:43,504
- What?
325
00:18:47,457 --> 00:18:49,025
You think I did this?
326
00:18:49,025 --> 00:18:50,875
- Given your history, is it any surprise
327
00:18:50,875 --> 00:18:52,105
our minds went there?
328
00:18:52,105 --> 00:18:54,377
- Daphne heard you threaten
to kill him last night.
329
00:18:54,377 --> 00:18:56,326
- I wasn't serious!
330
00:18:56,326 --> 00:18:58,425
Jesus, guys, how could you think that I
331
00:18:58,425 --> 00:18:59,846
would do something like this?
332
00:18:59,846 --> 00:19:02,565
- Somebody strangled him
and put him in Rachel's bed.
333
00:19:02,565 --> 00:19:05,166
- And you are the only one
that had a problem with him.
334
00:19:05,166 --> 00:19:06,846
- So you found him here?
335
00:19:06,846 --> 00:19:08,179
In Rachel's bed?
336
00:19:15,555 --> 00:19:19,246
And obviously Rachel was the
last one to see him alive.
337
00:19:19,246 --> 00:19:22,715
- I don't remember having sex with him and
338
00:19:22,715 --> 00:19:24,591
maybe I don't remember
killing him, either.
339
00:19:24,591 --> 00:19:28,481
- That's ridiculous, you
couldn't hurt anyone.
340
00:19:28,481 --> 00:19:29,642
- But I could?
341
00:19:29,642 --> 00:19:32,642
My own BFFs, thanks for the support!
342
00:19:34,098 --> 00:19:36,138
What about Daphne?
343
00:19:36,138 --> 00:19:37,378
- Me?
344
00:19:37,378 --> 00:19:38,959
- We all know that you're
still in love with Cam,
345
00:19:38,959 --> 00:19:41,268
ever since you two
hooked up at Burning Man!
346
00:19:41,268 --> 00:19:43,858
I bet you would just love
to spoil Rachel's big day!
347
00:19:43,858 --> 00:19:47,117
- By killing some innocent guy, get real!
348
00:19:47,117 --> 00:19:49,498
- Daphne and I worked that out ages ago,
349
00:19:49,498 --> 00:19:51,567
which is why she's one of my bridesmaids,
350
00:19:51,567 --> 00:19:53,429
the past is the past.
351
00:19:53,429 --> 00:19:55,818
- Okay, we really should call the cops.
352
00:19:55,818 --> 00:19:57,589
The longer that we wait,
the worse that this is
353
00:19:57,589 --> 00:19:58,947
gonna look for us!
354
00:19:58,947 --> 00:20:02,682
I mean, they can determine
the time of death!
355
00:20:02,682 --> 00:20:05,549
They're gonna wonder
why did we wait so long!
356
00:20:05,549 --> 00:20:08,069
- I think we should get rid of the body!
357
00:20:08,069 --> 00:20:09,189
- Of course you do.
358
00:20:09,189 --> 00:20:11,327
- We could put it behind some bushes at
359
00:20:11,327 --> 00:20:15,267
a deserted park, or in
a dumpster in an alley.
360
00:20:15,267 --> 00:20:18,032
We'll just say that he came,
he did his thing, and he left.
361
00:20:18,032 --> 00:20:19,527
He could've been killed on his way
362
00:20:19,527 --> 00:20:21,039
home by a mugger or something.
363
00:20:21,039 --> 00:20:22,956
- No, we'll get caught.
364
00:20:24,188 --> 00:20:26,178
Do you not watch CSI?
365
00:20:26,178 --> 00:20:27,928
- [Sharon] Which one?
366
00:20:29,407 --> 00:20:31,207
- Look, people that do stupid things,
367
00:20:31,207 --> 00:20:32,218
they always get caught.
368
00:20:32,218 --> 00:20:36,199
- So first I was a killer,
and now I'm stupid?
369
00:20:36,199 --> 00:20:38,187
- Okay, it's my wedding day!
370
00:20:38,187 --> 00:20:39,349
I don't wanna go to jail!
371
00:20:39,349 --> 00:20:40,787
- Maybe we should consider it.
372
00:20:40,787 --> 00:20:42,947
- You are all not thinking clearly.
373
00:20:42,947 --> 00:20:45,309
(doorbell rings)
374
00:20:45,309 --> 00:20:46,399
- [Owner] Hello?
375
00:20:46,399 --> 00:20:47,232
- The owner.
376
00:20:47,232 --> 00:20:48,427
- Is anyone home?
377
00:20:48,427 --> 00:20:49,439
- [Kim] She's coming in.
378
00:20:49,439 --> 00:20:50,490
- Stall her!
379
00:20:50,490 --> 00:20:51,323
We'll hide the body.
380
00:20:51,323 --> 00:20:52,678
- Ladies, are you in there?
381
00:20:52,678 --> 00:20:53,511
- [Sharon] Grab him in front!
382
00:20:53,511 --> 00:20:54,677
- [Daphne] God, I'm not touching him.
383
00:20:54,677 --> 00:20:57,594
- Is everything all right in there?
384
00:20:58,677 --> 00:20:59,758
- Oh, yeah!
385
00:20:59,758 --> 00:21:02,219
We're just helping Rachel get ready.
386
00:21:02,219 --> 00:21:03,389
You know how hard it is to squeeze
387
00:21:03,389 --> 00:21:05,103
a porker into her wedding dress.
388
00:21:05,103 --> 00:21:06,810
She's a stress eater, she put on a few
389
00:21:06,810 --> 00:21:08,158
pounds in the last couple of days,
390
00:21:08,158 --> 00:21:10,018
but anyways, we couldn't get the garbage
391
00:21:10,018 --> 00:21:12,839
disposal to work, but we fixed it!
392
00:21:12,839 --> 00:21:14,879
- [Rachel] What, what? Come on, what?
393
00:21:14,879 --> 00:21:16,919
- [Daphne] I'm sorry, he
has a boner or something!
394
00:21:16,919 --> 00:21:18,598
- So everything is fine,
so I'm so sorry that
395
00:21:18,598 --> 00:21:20,408
you came over here all
the way for nothing.
396
00:21:20,408 --> 00:21:21,241
- Is Rachel inside?
397
00:21:21,241 --> 00:21:22,321
- [Sharon] A boner?
398
00:21:22,321 --> 00:21:23,738
Oh, are you okay?
399
00:21:25,907 --> 00:21:28,246
Let's cover things up.
400
00:21:28,246 --> 00:21:29,526
- [Rachel] My veil.
401
00:21:29,526 --> 00:21:30,776
- Yes, but I...
402
00:21:33,562 --> 00:21:37,312
- I hope he doesn't see
someone he shouldn't.
403
00:21:45,467 --> 00:21:47,806
- Cam! What are you doing here?
404
00:21:47,806 --> 00:21:49,186
- You sounded worried earlier, I wanted to
405
00:21:49,186 --> 00:21:51,866
make sure you weren't
having pre-wedding jitters.
406
00:21:51,866 --> 00:21:56,546
Took me six shots of espresso
to sober up before I got...
407
00:21:56,546 --> 00:21:57,438
I'm gonna throw up.
408
00:21:57,438 --> 00:21:58,271
- No!
409
00:22:00,957 --> 00:22:04,290
(vomiting and coughing)
410
00:22:06,397 --> 00:22:09,008
- What the fuck is that?
411
00:22:09,008 --> 00:22:09,841
- I know.
412
00:22:11,387 --> 00:22:12,220
I know.
413
00:22:18,596 --> 00:22:21,263
We have to postpone the wedding.
414
00:22:24,638 --> 00:22:25,471
- No.
415
00:22:26,358 --> 00:22:28,256
- Cam, we have no choice.
416
00:22:28,256 --> 00:22:31,923
- We're doing it, just
as we planned, today.
417
00:22:33,402 --> 00:22:34,235
- Why?
418
00:22:34,235 --> 00:22:36,796
- Because I have to be
married by the time I'm 30!
419
00:22:36,796 --> 00:22:38,796
- Sweetie, no you don't.
420
00:22:40,866 --> 00:22:43,516
- When my grandmother died,
she left me a 10 million
421
00:22:43,516 --> 00:22:46,796
dollar trust fund, but there was a catch.
422
00:22:46,796 --> 00:22:48,466
She stipulated that I
have to be married by
423
00:22:48,466 --> 00:22:52,105
my 30th birthday, or
I don't get the money.
424
00:22:52,105 --> 00:22:54,234
- Why would she do something like that?
425
00:22:54,234 --> 00:22:55,754
- Gram was around long enough to see me
426
00:22:55,754 --> 00:22:57,921
go through my wild period.
427
00:22:59,384 --> 00:23:02,164
Let's just say she didn't exactly approve.
428
00:23:02,164 --> 00:23:04,815
She wanted me to settle down,
make something of myself,
429
00:23:04,815 --> 00:23:07,898
which I did, just after she was gone.
430
00:23:09,506 --> 00:23:10,764
But there's still that clause in the will
431
00:23:10,764 --> 00:23:12,596
that I need to adhere to.
432
00:23:12,596 --> 00:23:13,584
- Why didn't you tell me?
433
00:23:13,584 --> 00:23:15,836
- I was going to, I just...
434
00:23:15,836 --> 00:23:17,055
I didn't want you to think that I was
435
00:23:17,055 --> 00:23:21,222
marrying you just so I could
get my hands on the money.
436
00:23:22,324 --> 00:23:25,991
I'm marrying you because
I love you, Rachel.
437
00:23:27,476 --> 00:23:29,015
- Okay, that's really
sweet, but what I want to
438
00:23:29,015 --> 00:23:33,182
know is what happens to the
money if you don't get married?
439
00:23:38,676 --> 00:23:39,509
- Kim...
440
00:23:43,426 --> 00:23:45,784
- Oh my God, it was you.
441
00:23:45,784 --> 00:23:47,701
You hired the stripper.
442
00:23:48,813 --> 00:23:51,235
And you made my first drink.
443
00:23:51,235 --> 00:23:54,783
You spiked it, which is
why I was so out of it,
444
00:23:54,783 --> 00:23:57,323
and can't remember anything!
445
00:23:57,323 --> 00:24:00,490
And someone would've had to record it.
446
00:24:01,584 --> 00:24:04,813
You actually made moans
to make it look like
447
00:24:04,813 --> 00:24:07,403
it was actually happening,
like I was awake
448
00:24:07,403 --> 00:24:09,320
and I was enjoying it?!
449
00:24:10,213 --> 00:24:13,264
And you were gonna email it to Cam.
450
00:24:13,264 --> 00:24:15,864
So he'd call off the wedding.
451
00:24:15,864 --> 00:24:19,947
And you would be next in
line for the trust fund.
452
00:24:21,523 --> 00:24:22,356
- Kim.
453
00:24:24,955 --> 00:24:26,963
Did you really murder this poor guy?
454
00:24:26,963 --> 00:24:28,595
- Poor guy.
455
00:24:28,595 --> 00:24:30,573
Poor guy, oh come on, Cam, get off your
456
00:24:30,573 --> 00:24:32,835
high fucking horse, poor guy,
457
00:24:32,835 --> 00:24:35,585
he was just some sleazy stripper.
458
00:24:37,003 --> 00:24:39,184
Anyways, it was his own fault.
459
00:24:39,184 --> 00:24:42,488
No one was supposed to get hurt.
460
00:24:42,488 --> 00:24:44,323
But the bastard got greedy.
461
00:24:44,323 --> 00:24:45,293
That was shit.
462
00:24:45,293 --> 00:24:46,942
- This is grade-A cock right here.
463
00:24:46,942 --> 00:24:49,144
I'm a fuckin' pro, baby.
464
00:24:49,144 --> 00:24:52,523
- He demanded half of the money.
465
00:24:52,523 --> 00:24:56,493
Threatened to expose me to you and Rachel.
466
00:24:56,493 --> 00:24:58,315
Five million dollars,
and then that was it.
467
00:24:58,315 --> 00:24:59,664
- I think I deserve a
little tip on top of that.
468
00:24:59,664 --> 00:25:00,703
- I don't think you do at all.
469
00:25:00,703 --> 00:25:01,943
- Sometimes it's nice to
tip a nice performance.
470
00:25:01,943 --> 00:25:03,003
- We're talkin' five million dollars here.
471
00:25:03,003 --> 00:25:05,233
- I'm talkin' one million
dollars more on top of that.
472
00:25:05,233 --> 00:25:08,504
- So I just agreed to shut him up.
473
00:25:08,504 --> 00:25:10,663
But come on, I wasn't just gonna
474
00:25:10,663 --> 00:25:12,773
hand over five million dollars to some
475
00:25:12,773 --> 00:25:15,822
lameass cock jock fireman, so I made him
476
00:25:15,822 --> 00:25:19,572
the same special cocktail
that I made Rachel.
477
00:25:20,563 --> 00:25:23,980
And I kept him busy until it took effect.
478
00:25:26,863 --> 00:25:29,123
(moaning and grunting)
479
00:25:29,123 --> 00:25:30,883
- Fuck yeah!
480
00:25:30,883 --> 00:25:33,633
(dramatic music)
481
00:25:54,353 --> 00:25:56,153
- [Voiceover] And I could handle this
482
00:25:56,153 --> 00:25:58,236
problem once and for all.
483
00:25:59,884 --> 00:26:03,273
But it turned out to be a much better plan
484
00:26:03,273 --> 00:26:05,633
than I anticipated.
485
00:26:05,633 --> 00:26:08,103
Because cheating is one thing.
486
00:26:08,103 --> 00:26:10,532
But accidentally killing
a trick during a sex
487
00:26:10,532 --> 00:26:14,972
game gone wrong the night
before your wedding, well...
488
00:26:14,972 --> 00:26:17,305
There's just no way that Cam
489
00:26:18,233 --> 00:26:20,764
was ever gonna say I do.
490
00:26:20,764 --> 00:26:21,713
Not to her.
491
00:26:21,713 --> 00:26:24,793
- No wonder you wanted to call the cops!
492
00:26:24,793 --> 00:26:26,852
You knew it looked bad for me.
493
00:26:26,852 --> 00:26:28,935
- I did what I had to do.
494
00:26:30,013 --> 00:26:33,846
I mean, we're talking
10 million dollars here.
495
00:26:35,084 --> 00:26:36,251
It's not fair.
496
00:26:37,265 --> 00:26:39,174
Okay, I was the good girl.
497
00:26:39,174 --> 00:26:42,489
I went to Nana's house every Sunday.
498
00:26:42,489 --> 00:26:46,013
I remembered her birthdays, he didn't.
499
00:26:46,013 --> 00:26:50,064
I was the one that got straight
A's, I was the good girl.
500
00:26:50,064 --> 00:26:52,814
But the bitch left it all to him.
501
00:26:53,864 --> 00:26:55,864
Thought he could change.
502
00:26:57,025 --> 00:27:01,065
But it wasn't the money
that changed him, Rachel.
503
00:27:01,065 --> 00:27:01,982
It was you.
504
00:27:04,004 --> 00:27:06,825
- Your little Fredericks
of Hollywood number,
505
00:27:06,825 --> 00:27:08,695
is it pre-shrunk?
506
00:27:08,695 --> 00:27:09,528
- No.
507
00:27:16,384 --> 00:27:18,634
- Worst maid of honor ever!
508
00:27:21,835 --> 00:27:26,002
(radio chatter)
(somber music)
509
00:27:28,385 --> 00:27:31,375
- So I guess I won't
be giving you my toast.
510
00:27:31,375 --> 00:27:32,945
- Kim, this is serious.
511
00:27:32,945 --> 00:27:35,167
You killed someone.
512
00:27:35,167 --> 00:27:36,000
- I know.
513
00:27:37,215 --> 00:27:40,385
But I also know what
kind of man you are, Cam.
514
00:27:40,385 --> 00:27:42,396
And you'll spend most of
that 10 million dollars
515
00:27:42,396 --> 00:27:46,229
on the best doctors and
lawyers to get me off.
516
00:27:48,475 --> 00:27:50,058
I'll see you again.
517
00:27:51,308 --> 00:27:52,141
Soon.
518
00:27:54,628 --> 00:27:57,545
Oh, and will you save me some cake?
519
00:27:58,407 --> 00:28:01,876
You know how I love baking some cake.
520
00:28:01,876 --> 00:28:04,047
- I'll come visit you, okay,
521
00:28:04,047 --> 00:28:05,807
and I'll get you the cake.
522
00:28:05,807 --> 00:28:06,640
- No, no.
523
00:28:14,457 --> 00:28:17,124
(radio chatter)
524
00:28:30,544 --> 00:28:32,304
- It's been said it's bad luck for a bride
525
00:28:32,304 --> 00:28:35,384
and groom to see each
other before the wedding.
526
00:28:35,384 --> 00:28:37,044
Although, after the day they've had,
527
00:28:37,044 --> 00:28:39,364
I don't blame Rachel or Cam for throwing
528
00:28:39,364 --> 00:28:41,435
caution to the wind.
529
00:28:41,435 --> 00:28:45,355
As for lessons learned, it's
an age old question for woman:
530
00:28:45,355 --> 00:28:48,272
Do you marry for love or for money?
531
00:28:49,136 --> 00:28:51,584
(laughing)
532
00:28:51,584 --> 00:28:53,496
Lucky, though, for Rachel Worth,
533
00:28:53,496 --> 00:28:55,984
today she doesn't have to choose.
534
00:28:55,984 --> 00:28:56,817
Mahalo!
535
00:28:58,704 --> 00:29:02,075
♫ You said you want to marry me
536
00:29:02,075 --> 00:29:06,120
♫ It's dark in here, I
cannot find the light
537
00:29:06,120 --> 00:29:09,364
♫ You said why don't we go outside
538
00:29:09,364 --> 00:29:13,885
♫ We can wander round,
we can stay up all night
539
00:29:13,885 --> 00:29:16,824
♫ I know I have to come along
540
00:29:16,824 --> 00:29:18,835
♫ If I want to find it
541
00:29:18,835 --> 00:29:22,502
♫ If I want to make it real
542
00:29:23,945 --> 00:29:27,216
♫ Oh, I might like that
543
00:29:27,216 --> 00:29:31,644
♫ Everything has lost its impact
544
00:29:31,644 --> 00:29:34,656
♫ Oh, I might like that
545
00:29:34,656 --> 00:29:39,045
♫ Everything has lost its impact
546
00:29:39,045 --> 00:29:42,754
♫ Oh, I might like that
547
00:29:42,754 --> 00:29:47,342
♫ Everything has lost,
it gets away from me ♫
548
00:29:47,342 --> 00:29:51,532
(upbeat flamenco guitar)
549
00:29:51,532 --> 00:29:55,301
(electric buzzing)
- [Voiceover] Kill, Ubu, kill!
550
00:29:55,301 --> 00:29:56,134
Good fish.
38552
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