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All language subtitles for Christmas.Is.Cancneled.2021.720p.WEBRip.x264.AAC-[YTS.MX]

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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000 Downloaded from YTS.MX 2 00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:13,000 Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX 3 00:00:36,036 --> 00:00:39,430 [sleigh bell melody] 4 00:00:39,474 --> 00:00:40,823 [up-tempo Christmas rock] 5 00:00:40,866 --> 00:00:43,391 ♪ Oh, yeah, yeah...♪ 6 00:00:43,434 --> 00:00:45,741 ♪ Everybody, everybody♪ 7 00:00:45,784 --> 00:00:48,135 ♪ Always blames it On Christmas♪ 8 00:00:48,178 --> 00:00:49,962 ♪ This has become♪ 9 00:00:50,006 --> 00:00:51,921 ♪ A Christmas tradition♪ 10 00:00:51,964 --> 00:00:54,010 ♪ To blame it on Christmas♪ 11 00:00:54,054 --> 00:00:58,058 ♪ Go ahead and blame it All on...♪ 12 00:00:58,101 --> 00:01:01,104 ♪ I said, everybody, everybody♪ 13 00:01:01,148 --> 00:01:03,585 ♪ Always blames it On Christmas♪ 14 00:01:03,628 --> 00:01:07,110 ♪ This has become A Christmas tradition♪ 15 00:01:07,154 --> 00:01:10,679 -♪ So blame it on Christmas♪ -♪ Oh, you can blame it♪ 16 00:01:10,722 --> 00:01:13,812 ♪ Cinnamon spices Fill the room♪ 17 00:01:13,856 --> 00:01:15,814 ♪ Family members♪ 18 00:01:15,858 --> 00:01:17,773 ♪ Will be here soon♪ 19 00:01:17,816 --> 00:01:22,299 ♪ The snowfall makes Good, full snowballs♪ 20 00:01:22,343 --> 00:01:24,214 ♪ Red and white Christmas lights♪ 21 00:01:24,258 --> 00:01:26,042 ♪ Fill the malls♪ 22 00:01:26,086 --> 00:01:28,262 ♪ Something '’bout them Bells jingling♪ 23 00:01:28,305 --> 00:01:29,828 ♪ People mingling♪ 24 00:01:29,872 --> 00:01:32,353 ♪ Brings out The crazy in us all♪ 25 00:01:33,658 --> 00:01:34,964 [distant knocks] 26 00:01:36,270 --> 00:01:38,098 [stronger knock] 27 00:01:45,148 --> 00:01:48,282 Hey, monkey, when'’d you get back?Last night. 28 00:01:48,325 --> 00:01:50,327 How was your research retreat? 29 00:01:50,371 --> 00:01:51,894 It was great. I learned a lot, 30 00:01:51,937 --> 00:01:54,505 and, um, Forsite is doing some great initiatives 31 00:01:54,549 --> 00:01:56,986 in developing nations, especially Botswana. 32 00:01:57,029 --> 00:01:58,988 I heard our company was doing great things. 33 00:01:59,031 --> 00:02:01,556 -That'’s so interesting. -[laughing] 34 00:02:01,599 --> 00:02:03,384 Not as interesting as that shirt you'’re wearing. 35 00:02:03,427 --> 00:02:04,863 Can we talk about that for a second? 36 00:02:04,907 --> 00:02:06,300 What, you don'’t-- you don'’t like this? 37 00:02:06,343 --> 00:02:08,389 I was just trying something new.Yeah, no. 38 00:02:08,432 --> 00:02:10,042 I picked up your dry cleaning 39 00:02:10,086 --> 00:02:11,609 and folded all the laundry. 40 00:02:11,653 --> 00:02:14,046 Uh, how does pot roast sound for dinner? 41 00:02:15,439 --> 00:02:18,181 Emma, it'’s been two years since Mom. 42 00:02:18,225 --> 00:02:22,054 Honey, you don'’t have to keep taking care of me like this. 43 00:02:22,098 --> 00:02:25,188 You have potato chips and vodka for dinner when I'’m not here. 44 00:02:25,232 --> 00:02:28,583 It'’s been two months. You'’re probably half-potato by now. 45 00:02:28,626 --> 00:02:30,976 What was that message that you left about the lake house? 46 00:02:31,020 --> 00:02:32,413 We'’re not going for the holidays? 47 00:02:32,456 --> 00:02:34,371 Yeah, I just wasn'’t feeling it this year. 48 00:02:36,373 --> 00:02:37,809 God, we'’re so behind here. 49 00:02:37,853 --> 00:02:39,681 We still have to decorate the house. 50 00:02:39,724 --> 00:02:42,205 -The tree. -Get the tree. 51 00:02:42,249 --> 00:02:43,554 Brandy? 52 00:02:44,860 --> 00:02:46,775 What is she doing back at her parents'’ house? 53 00:02:46,818 --> 00:02:48,951 I thought she lived in Los Angeles. 54 00:02:48,994 --> 00:02:52,128 Uh, no, actually she'’s lived all over for the last year. 55 00:02:52,172 --> 00:02:54,391 She was the road manager for The Seven Strokes. 56 00:02:55,566 --> 00:02:58,482 Was she "Head of Stroking"? 57 00:02:58,526 --> 00:03:01,224 She tired of traveling, so she moved back into her folks'’ house, 58 00:03:01,268 --> 00:03:04,053 -which is empty. -How do you know all that? Have you talked to her? 59 00:03:04,096 --> 00:03:07,099 Well, she'’s been back a few months, so yes. 60 00:03:07,143 --> 00:03:09,798 You'’ve just been gone for most of that time, 61 00:03:09,841 --> 00:03:12,322 so you probably just didn'’t run into her. 62 00:03:12,366 --> 00:03:13,715 Thank God. 63 00:03:13,758 --> 00:03:15,804 -Shit! -[thudding] 64 00:03:15,847 --> 00:03:17,893 What?What are you doing? 65 00:03:17,936 --> 00:03:20,461 -Get down! -Come on. Get up. 66 00:03:20,504 --> 00:03:21,810 Don'’t let her see you! 67 00:03:21,853 --> 00:03:23,420 What is wrong with you? 68 00:03:23,464 --> 00:03:24,987 No, don'’t! 69 00:03:30,645 --> 00:03:33,604 -Hi, Brandy. -Hi, is Emma here? 70 00:03:34,736 --> 00:03:36,128 Yeah. 71 00:03:36,738 --> 00:03:38,043 [clearing throat] 72 00:03:38,087 --> 00:03:41,003 Oh, hey! How are ya, lady? 73 00:03:41,046 --> 00:03:43,048 -It'’s been a minute. -Ten years. 74 00:03:43,092 --> 00:03:45,268 Right. Well, I heard you were out of town. 75 00:03:45,312 --> 00:03:47,183 Welcome back. 76 00:03:47,227 --> 00:03:50,055 Anyway, I just wanted to come over and holler at ya. 77 00:03:53,233 --> 00:03:54,669 Uh... 78 00:03:54,712 --> 00:03:56,801 also, I wanted to say that I was really sorry 79 00:03:56,845 --> 00:03:59,456 to hear about your mom. She was a badass. 80 00:04:00,936 --> 00:04:03,155 Do you remember that time she took us to the mall, 81 00:04:03,199 --> 00:04:04,983 and we bought those bras with the pineapples on '’em? 82 00:04:05,027 --> 00:04:07,899 -[chuckling] -How could I forget? 83 00:04:07,943 --> 00:04:10,206 My mom was pretty distracted back then, 84 00:04:10,250 --> 00:04:12,904 going through the divorce and everything, and... 85 00:04:12,948 --> 00:04:14,776 Well, Jo was really sweet to me. 86 00:04:14,819 --> 00:04:16,560 I'’ll never forget it. 87 00:04:16,604 --> 00:04:19,650 Joanna. Nobody called her Jo. 88 00:04:21,957 --> 00:04:24,394 Okay... then. 89 00:04:24,438 --> 00:04:26,135 Well, maybe I'’ll see you around. 90 00:04:31,880 --> 00:04:34,012 [whispering] You tell her. 91 00:04:34,056 --> 00:04:35,797 [sighing] I know. 92 00:04:39,191 --> 00:04:40,758 Emma. 93 00:04:40,802 --> 00:04:42,194 [Charlyne] I know you'’re going to your dad's 94 00:04:42,238 --> 00:04:43,805 for Christmas, but New Year'’s, 95 00:04:43,848 --> 00:04:45,502 you'’re going out with me and my girl Lola. 96 00:04:45,546 --> 00:04:47,678 That sounds fun, but Dad and I always watch-- 97 00:04:47,722 --> 00:04:49,854 -Please don'’t finish that. -Ryan Seacrest'’s Rockin'’ Eve. 98 00:04:49,898 --> 00:04:51,334 Oh, God. All right. 99 00:04:51,378 --> 00:04:53,510 Well, Hot John from PR-- You know Hot John? 100 00:04:53,554 --> 00:04:55,338 Oh, Hot John.The-- The swoopy hair? 101 00:04:55,382 --> 00:04:56,687 Uh, he'’s having a party.Oh. 102 00:04:56,731 --> 00:04:58,167 And I don'’t like dudes, 103 00:04:58,210 --> 00:04:59,951 but I'’ll go if you'’ll need a wingman. 104 00:04:59,995 --> 00:05:01,823 We'’re gonna get you in an outfit the breeders find sexy. 105 00:05:01,866 --> 00:05:03,868 You'’re gonna get drunk and laid 106 00:05:03,912 --> 00:05:05,957 like a normal 20-something-year-old human. 107 00:05:06,001 --> 00:05:07,524 I'’m normal. 108 00:05:07,568 --> 00:05:09,570 You cook your dad pot roast, 109 00:05:09,613 --> 00:05:13,051 and I can bet the blazer you'’re wearing under there is from Talbots. 110 00:05:13,095 --> 00:05:15,184 I'’m sorry for helping my lonely widowed father 111 00:05:15,227 --> 00:05:17,882 through a hard time. I'’m a monster. 112 00:05:17,926 --> 00:05:21,712 Here'’s the real question. Are you helping him or yourself? 113 00:05:21,756 --> 00:05:23,801 Is he lonely, or are you? 114 00:05:23,845 --> 00:05:26,369 Ouch, Charlyne.I'’m sorry. 115 00:05:26,413 --> 00:05:28,284 But eventually your dad is gonna find 116 00:05:28,328 --> 00:05:29,851 friends his own age and start dating, 117 00:05:29,894 --> 00:05:32,070 and where'’s that gonna leave you? 118 00:05:32,114 --> 00:05:35,378 Your dad'’s getting laid, and you'’re not? That'’s bottom. 119 00:05:35,422 --> 00:05:37,859 -Whoa, whoa, whoa. Dad'’s not getting laid, okay? -Right. 120 00:05:37,902 --> 00:05:40,862 It'’s been two years.Yeah, two years. 121 00:05:40,905 --> 00:05:42,429 Two years.Two years. 122 00:05:42,472 --> 00:05:45,388 -What are you talking about? -T-Two years. Really? 123 00:05:45,432 --> 00:05:49,261 When'’s the last time someone touched your shame center? 124 00:05:49,305 --> 00:05:50,915 Oh, you mean my mistletoe? 125 00:05:50,959 --> 00:05:52,439 Yes, your south pole. 126 00:05:52,482 --> 00:05:55,050 [chuckling] My happy valley. 127 00:05:55,093 --> 00:05:56,530 No, no, no, your snowflake valley. 128 00:05:56,573 --> 00:05:58,619 -Right. -[laughing] 129 00:05:58,662 --> 00:06:01,535 Ugh! The last time someone jingled my bells... 130 00:06:01,578 --> 00:06:03,406 Mmm-hmm.Including myself? 131 00:06:03,450 --> 00:06:04,929 Yes. 132 00:06:04,973 --> 00:06:06,496 I'’d say watching The Mandalorian 133 00:06:06,540 --> 00:06:08,237 a few nights ago.Do not distract them. 134 00:06:08,280 --> 00:06:10,282 The only thing you nerds should be thinking about 135 00:06:10,326 --> 00:06:12,676 is solid-state lithium batteries. 136 00:06:12,720 --> 00:06:13,851 Pick that up. 137 00:06:15,070 --> 00:06:17,202 Say hi to Daddy for me. 138 00:06:17,246 --> 00:06:20,336 You'’re fired. I don't have the authority to do that, but if I did... 139 00:06:25,036 --> 00:06:26,255 Is he in, Beatrice? 140 00:06:26,298 --> 00:06:27,691 Yes, go ahead, hon. 141 00:06:29,040 --> 00:06:31,042 -Nice jacket. -[soft chuckle] 142 00:06:32,348 --> 00:06:34,176 Hey. What'’s up, Dad? 143 00:06:34,219 --> 00:06:37,005 Pickup truck sales. Classic is in again. 144 00:06:38,528 --> 00:06:40,400 Classics are never out of style. 145 00:06:41,270 --> 00:06:42,793 Ooh, I forgot to tell you, 146 00:06:42,837 --> 00:06:44,882 I have a breakfast meeting this morning, um... 147 00:06:44,926 --> 00:06:46,318 Oh, okay, I was just wondering 148 00:06:46,362 --> 00:06:49,452 what day I should come up for the holidays. 149 00:06:49,496 --> 00:06:52,542 Yeah, I'’ve been meaning to talk to you about that. 150 00:06:52,586 --> 00:06:54,631 -All right. -Just kind of a logistical thing, 151 00:06:54,675 --> 00:06:56,981 but we don'’t have to talk about it now. We can talk about it later. 152 00:06:57,025 --> 00:07:00,202 "Logistics." Did you turn my bedroom into a gym or something? 153 00:07:00,245 --> 00:07:01,421 No. 154 00:07:03,205 --> 00:07:05,250 [hip-hop rhythm] 155 00:07:12,519 --> 00:07:13,737 ♪ Yo, yo, yo♪ 156 00:07:15,173 --> 00:07:17,132 ♪ You know what it is♪ 157 00:07:17,175 --> 00:07:20,091 ♪ Turn it up Uh-huh, let'’s go♪ 158 00:07:20,135 --> 00:07:21,702 ♪ Walk in the place I own it♪ 159 00:07:21,745 --> 00:07:23,747 ♪ Walk in-- Walk in the place, I own it♪ 160 00:07:23,791 --> 00:07:25,880 ♪ Walk in-- Walk in the place, I own it♪ 161 00:07:25,923 --> 00:07:28,404 ♪ Walk in-- Walk in the place, I own it♪ 162 00:07:28,448 --> 00:07:30,232 ♪ Walk in the place I own it♪ 163 00:07:30,275 --> 00:07:32,060 ♪ Need all the attention And I need it on the daily♪ 164 00:07:32,103 --> 00:07:34,628 ♪ Spotlight queen Put the cameras on me♪ 165 00:07:34,671 --> 00:07:36,107 What are you doing here? 166 00:07:36,151 --> 00:07:38,022 I'’m here to gab with your dad. 167 00:07:38,066 --> 00:07:39,197 He didn'’t tell you? 168 00:07:40,460 --> 00:07:41,983 Brandy'’s my breakfast meeting, 169 00:07:42,026 --> 00:07:44,115 which was supposed to be at the Russell Street Deli. 170 00:07:45,465 --> 00:07:49,207 Oh, right. Well, that explains the dress. 171 00:07:49,251 --> 00:07:50,861 Well, actually I left a message with Bea 172 00:07:50,905 --> 00:07:52,297 that I'’d come here instead. 173 00:07:52,820 --> 00:07:54,169 Yeah, mmm. 174 00:07:54,212 --> 00:07:56,301 Didn'’t get that message. 175 00:07:56,345 --> 00:07:59,261 Uh, why don'’t we go back inside? Come on. 176 00:08:02,394 --> 00:08:04,701 Oh, I guess we double-dunked. 177 00:08:04,745 --> 00:08:06,834 But you can never have too many holes. 178 00:08:06,877 --> 00:08:09,140 Some of us max out at two. 179 00:08:09,184 --> 00:08:11,621 So, what are you meeting with my dad about? 180 00:08:11,665 --> 00:08:14,232 Well, I just got a job managing a bar downtown. 181 00:08:14,276 --> 00:08:16,191 The Raven, you remember it? 182 00:08:16,234 --> 00:08:18,541 Of course, I mean, who hasn'’t puked in a bathroom stall there? 183 00:08:18,585 --> 00:08:20,935 [chuckles] Or peed in the alley, right? 184 00:08:20,978 --> 00:08:23,590 Anyhoo, Forsite Motors is gonna be a sponsor 185 00:08:23,633 --> 00:08:25,113 for our New Year'’s Eve concert 186 00:08:25,156 --> 00:08:27,768 -for homelessness. -You'’re for homelessness? 187 00:08:27,811 --> 00:08:29,987 You'’ve always had a funny sense of humor. 188 00:08:31,162 --> 00:08:33,295 That'’s redundant. But my dad'’s not the one 189 00:08:33,338 --> 00:08:35,558 that you talk to about sponsorships. 190 00:08:35,602 --> 00:08:38,256 Well, Jack said he could handle it this one time. 191 00:08:39,649 --> 00:08:41,477 You didn'’t mention that, Jack. 192 00:08:43,392 --> 00:08:45,525 Oh, um, it wasn'’t a big deal. 193 00:08:47,091 --> 00:08:48,615 The concert'’s gonna be fun. 194 00:08:48,658 --> 00:08:50,965 So maybe we could all go together. 195 00:08:53,315 --> 00:08:54,882 I like fun. 196 00:08:54,925 --> 00:08:57,624 Your musical taste runs from Bruce to Springsteen, 197 00:08:57,667 --> 00:09:00,583 so, maybe we should all just get back to work? 198 00:09:01,584 --> 00:09:03,151 I'’m sure you have dressing rooms 199 00:09:03,194 --> 00:09:05,849 that need to be restocked with gin and herpes meds. 200 00:09:06,807 --> 00:09:09,026 Um, all right, let'’s go. 201 00:09:09,070 --> 00:09:10,332 -Brandy? -Yeah. 202 00:09:10,375 --> 00:09:11,594 Come on. 203 00:09:13,770 --> 00:09:14,815 Yeah. 204 00:09:23,824 --> 00:09:25,652 How annoying is she? 205 00:09:25,695 --> 00:09:27,392 She'’s meeting with my dad? 206 00:09:27,436 --> 00:09:29,525 I know, and I can'’t believe 207 00:09:29,569 --> 00:09:33,398 she had the nerve to come up to this office. 208 00:09:33,442 --> 00:09:36,706 What? Bea? 209 00:09:36,750 --> 00:09:39,404 Oh, this isn'’t their first meeting. 210 00:09:39,448 --> 00:09:41,885 Wait, meeting or... meeting? 211 00:09:45,280 --> 00:09:46,498 Mmm-hmm. 212 00:09:49,719 --> 00:09:51,155 [whispering indistinctly] 213 00:09:52,853 --> 00:09:54,376 [whispering] You just have to tell her. 214 00:09:54,419 --> 00:09:57,509 I know I just have to tell her, it just... 215 00:09:57,553 --> 00:09:59,555 It'’s not that easy. It'’s Emma, right? 216 00:09:59,599 --> 00:10:00,948 What the-- Oh! 217 00:10:01,818 --> 00:10:03,428 Just... 218 00:10:03,472 --> 00:10:06,257 "Very well, young lady, drive safely." 219 00:10:06,301 --> 00:10:07,607 "Thank you, kindly sir." 220 00:10:07,650 --> 00:10:09,260 Anyway, I have to get back to the office. 221 00:10:09,304 --> 00:10:10,871 Is there any chance we could... 222 00:10:10,914 --> 00:10:12,524 -Bye-bye. -Can I see you tonight? 223 00:10:12,568 --> 00:10:13,787 Yeah, well, make sure you turn off... 224 00:10:13,830 --> 00:10:15,615 -I said "bye-bye." -...the porch light. 225 00:10:15,658 --> 00:10:18,182 Wha... stop. 226 00:10:18,226 --> 00:10:21,055 Rape. Stop raping my dad! 227 00:10:21,098 --> 00:10:22,404 -Oh, shit. -Shit. 228 00:10:22,447 --> 00:10:24,188 -Shit. -Wha-- 229 00:10:24,232 --> 00:10:25,929 [groaning] 230 00:10:28,410 --> 00:10:31,021 [panting] 231 00:10:34,764 --> 00:10:36,723 Here you go. 232 00:10:36,766 --> 00:10:38,507 That should do it. 233 00:10:42,859 --> 00:10:44,687 ♪ The itsy-bitsy spider♪ 234 00:10:44,731 --> 00:10:46,689 ♪ Went up the water spout♪ 235 00:10:46,733 --> 00:10:47,951 ♪ Down came the--♪ 236 00:10:48,909 --> 00:10:51,955 [Christmas elevator music] 237 00:10:54,044 --> 00:10:55,655 Okay, here'’s what obviously happened. 238 00:10:57,265 --> 00:10:58,832 That Venus fly-snatch 239 00:10:58,875 --> 00:11:01,051 preyed on you during a vulnerable time. 240 00:11:01,095 --> 00:11:02,879 But it'’s not your fault. 241 00:11:02,923 --> 00:11:04,315 You'’re just a lonely old widower 242 00:11:04,359 --> 00:11:05,839 whose only female connection now 243 00:11:05,882 --> 00:11:07,710 are the local news weather ladies. 244 00:11:09,016 --> 00:11:10,582 [soft thudding] 245 00:11:12,759 --> 00:11:15,370 Brandy and I are seeing each other. 246 00:11:16,327 --> 00:11:19,548 Like... seeing each other'’s... 247 00:11:19,591 --> 00:11:21,506 privates? [retching] 248 00:11:23,465 --> 00:11:24,945 [retching] Geez. 249 00:11:24,988 --> 00:11:26,990 [groaning] 250 00:11:27,034 --> 00:11:29,297 Just... Just stop it.I need to get it out. 251 00:11:31,778 --> 00:11:33,170 Stop, stop, stop. 252 00:11:33,214 --> 00:11:35,695 Please.Okay, I have to get out of here. 253 00:11:35,738 --> 00:11:36,739 I'’ve... 254 00:11:37,871 --> 00:11:40,134 [Christmas elevator music] 255 00:11:44,791 --> 00:11:46,793 Dad? 256 00:11:46,836 --> 00:11:50,100 Brandy and I are the same age. 257 00:11:50,144 --> 00:11:51,972 We went to school together. 258 00:11:52,015 --> 00:11:54,539 We bought the same pineapple bras. 259 00:11:54,583 --> 00:11:57,629 Yeah, that'’s not ideal, but a lot'’s changed since then. 260 00:11:57,673 --> 00:11:59,631 I didn'’t even know you were friends back then. 261 00:11:59,675 --> 00:12:01,155 We weren'’t.What I'’m trying to say is, 262 00:12:01,198 --> 00:12:04,288 you should get to know Brandy now, like I did. 263 00:12:04,332 --> 00:12:05,768 She'’s fantastic. She is. 264 00:12:05,812 --> 00:12:07,204 She'’s generous, open-hearted, 265 00:12:07,248 --> 00:12:08,815 -beautiful. -Oh. 266 00:12:08,858 --> 00:12:11,339 I'’m gonna punch you in the throat, widow-raper. 267 00:12:11,382 --> 00:12:12,775 What? 268 00:12:12,819 --> 00:12:14,298 Okay, you know what? No. 269 00:12:14,342 --> 00:12:16,736 Emma, come on out here. Let'’s talk. 270 00:12:16,779 --> 00:12:18,172 [scoffs]Emma... 271 00:12:20,000 --> 00:12:21,131 Will you please... 272 00:12:21,175 --> 00:12:23,394 I like it here. 273 00:12:23,438 --> 00:12:24,656 I live here now. 274 00:12:26,049 --> 00:12:28,399 -[clearing throat] -Okay. 275 00:12:28,443 --> 00:12:31,098 I'’m really sorry that you had to find out like that, okay? 276 00:12:31,141 --> 00:12:33,274 I kept telling your dad we should just treat this 277 00:12:33,317 --> 00:12:35,232 like a bikini wax. Just rip the strip. 278 00:12:35,276 --> 00:12:36,625 She did. She said, "Rip the strip." 279 00:12:36,668 --> 00:12:38,453 It may hurt like hell at first, 280 00:12:38,496 --> 00:12:40,934 but then after that, it'’s all-- it's all smooth. 281 00:12:40,977 --> 00:12:43,153 You know? And I told him you'’re the smartest girl I know, 282 00:12:43,197 --> 00:12:46,504 -and that you were mature enough to handle this. -Oh, did you? 283 00:12:46,548 --> 00:12:48,811 And I knew that if you had time to really think about it, 284 00:12:48,855 --> 00:12:50,944 you'’d see that you'’re not losing him, 285 00:12:50,987 --> 00:12:54,338 -you'’re gaining me. -Oh, am I? 286 00:12:54,382 --> 00:12:55,905 Yeah.We really-- 287 00:12:55,949 --> 00:12:58,212 We weren'’t trying to hurt you. 288 00:12:58,255 --> 00:13:00,388 So, the two of you are "we" now? 289 00:13:00,431 --> 00:13:02,259 -And I'’m just me? -Oh. 290 00:13:02,303 --> 00:13:04,871 -Yeah, but there are no sides. -No, we'’re all in this together. 291 00:13:04,914 --> 00:13:07,003 In what together? Your vagina? 292 00:13:07,047 --> 00:13:08,526 No-- [groans] 293 00:13:08,570 --> 00:13:10,833 How long has this been going on for? 294 00:13:13,967 --> 00:13:16,621 How long? 295 00:13:16,665 --> 00:13:18,972 Two months. 296 00:13:19,015 --> 00:13:20,930 -Two months? -We didn'’t plan it. 297 00:13:20,974 --> 00:13:24,412 -[voice echoing, fading] It just sort of happened... -Yeah. 298 00:13:25,500 --> 00:13:27,415 [Jack, distorted] Emma? 299 00:13:32,028 --> 00:13:34,857 Brandy and I are spending the holidays together. 300 00:13:34,901 --> 00:13:37,468 [echoing, distorted] And we want you to join us. 301 00:13:42,169 --> 00:13:45,041 Thank you for your offer, 302 00:13:45,085 --> 00:13:47,478 but I am otherwise engaged for the holidays. 303 00:13:47,522 --> 00:13:49,611 You don'’t have other plans. 304 00:13:49,654 --> 00:13:51,874 I will be building my bunker 305 00:13:51,918 --> 00:13:55,312 and collecting my end-of-days supply, 306 00:13:55,356 --> 00:13:59,229 because a shroud of darkness has descended on the world. 307 00:13:59,273 --> 00:14:01,841 Evil has won 308 00:14:01,884 --> 00:14:03,407 and Christmas 309 00:14:03,451 --> 00:14:06,628 is fucking canceled! 310 00:14:09,239 --> 00:14:12,373 [people exclaiming] 311 00:14:12,416 --> 00:14:15,245 [Emma] I can'’t believe it. It'’s a nightmare. 312 00:14:15,289 --> 00:14:19,902 My dad is having sex with "Handy" Barnes! 313 00:14:19,946 --> 00:14:20,990 What'’re you doing? 314 00:14:21,034 --> 00:14:23,384 The saltshaker. 315 00:14:23,427 --> 00:14:24,820 Pepper grinder. This is fun. 316 00:14:24,864 --> 00:14:26,126 Ooh, shakin'’ the snake. 317 00:14:26,169 --> 00:14:28,650 What-- Oh, stop it! Oh, gross! 318 00:14:28,693 --> 00:14:32,045 That is not my forte, but I know that'’s not how you do that. 319 00:14:32,088 --> 00:14:33,394 Who is "Handy" Barnes? 320 00:14:33,437 --> 00:14:35,918 Brandy. We went to high school together. 321 00:14:35,962 --> 00:14:37,877 She was my nemesis. 322 00:14:37,920 --> 00:14:41,663 -She even stole my crush, Josh Jamison. -Oh. 323 00:14:41,706 --> 00:14:43,404 And now she'’s dating my father. 324 00:14:43,447 --> 00:14:45,928 Gross, yeah, that has a certain "ick" factor to it. 325 00:14:45,972 --> 00:14:49,540 Oh, you think? Our lockers were next to each other. 326 00:14:49,584 --> 00:14:51,368 We spent afternoons together because study hall 327 00:14:51,412 --> 00:14:53,283 and detention were in the same room. 328 00:14:54,154 --> 00:14:55,546 Oh... oh, my God. 329 00:14:55,590 --> 00:14:57,331 I borrowed a tampon from her once after gym. 330 00:14:57,374 --> 00:14:59,724 I think that makes us Eskimo sisters. 331 00:14:59,768 --> 00:15:00,943 No, it doesn'’t. 332 00:15:00,987 --> 00:15:03,511 God, what is my dad doing? 333 00:15:03,554 --> 00:15:06,209 I mean, what could he possibly see in her? 334 00:15:06,253 --> 00:15:07,689 Do you have a photo? 335 00:15:13,390 --> 00:15:15,610 I know, she'’s attractive. 336 00:15:15,653 --> 00:15:17,612 No, no, no. 337 00:15:17,655 --> 00:15:20,310 If I wasn'’t dating Lola, I would literally step over your corpse 338 00:15:20,354 --> 00:15:22,138 to cup those tits for five seconds. 339 00:15:22,182 --> 00:15:23,879 -Not helping. -Listen, 340 00:15:23,923 --> 00:15:28,362 it is in a dude'’s DNA to try and bang the hottest, 341 00:15:28,405 --> 00:15:30,277 youngest chick he can. 342 00:15:30,320 --> 00:15:32,888 Mick Jagger'’s partner is, like, the same age as his grandkid. 343 00:15:32,932 --> 00:15:34,846 Gross. 344 00:15:34,890 --> 00:15:38,546 And he'’s a Rolling Stone. My dad has gallstones. 345 00:15:38,589 --> 00:15:42,550 -You got a hot dad. -[scoffs] No, I don'’t. 346 00:15:42,593 --> 00:15:45,422 Uh, yeah, he has foxy dad vibes. I'’m sorry. 347 00:15:45,466 --> 00:15:48,208 How would you like it if I started dating your father? 348 00:15:48,251 --> 00:15:49,905 You'’d be the older woman, because he'’s dating 349 00:15:49,949 --> 00:15:51,689 his nail technician and she'’s 22. 350 00:15:51,733 --> 00:15:54,997 Yeah, after the third marriage, it gets a little blurry, 351 00:15:55,041 --> 00:15:58,218 but I do get kick-ass nail art from this one. 352 00:15:58,261 --> 00:15:59,871 Just please be on my side. 353 00:15:59,915 --> 00:16:04,093 I am on your side... always. Probably just a sex thing. 354 00:16:04,137 --> 00:16:05,573 You just gotta wait it out. 355 00:16:05,616 --> 00:16:07,923 It'’s when they think they'’re in love 356 00:16:07,967 --> 00:16:10,012 -that things get dicey. -In love? 357 00:16:10,056 --> 00:16:12,058 -[door opening] -[Jack] Emma? 358 00:16:13,973 --> 00:16:15,409 Oh, hey, Charlyne. 359 00:16:17,585 --> 00:16:19,326 Um, could I talk to my daughter? 360 00:16:21,284 --> 00:16:25,985 Yeah, sure. I was, uh, just on my way out. 361 00:16:26,028 --> 00:16:30,163 I actually have a date with my own twenty-something, 362 00:16:30,206 --> 00:16:32,730 smoking-hot girlfriend. Up top. 363 00:16:39,302 --> 00:16:40,869 Sorry I didn'’t tell you sooner. 364 00:16:40,912 --> 00:16:42,653 -[door closing] -I wanted to wait 365 00:16:42,697 --> 00:16:45,091 to see if it was something real. 366 00:16:45,134 --> 00:16:47,049 And then you were gone for a while, 367 00:16:47,093 --> 00:16:49,921 and I guess it was hard to bring up. 368 00:16:49,965 --> 00:16:52,185 "Hard to bring up"? 369 00:16:52,228 --> 00:16:54,361 You negotiate with union bosses. 370 00:16:54,404 --> 00:16:56,537 I'’m harder to talk to than Fat Frank? 371 00:16:56,580 --> 00:16:58,800 You'’re my daughter. It'’s different. 372 00:16:58,843 --> 00:17:00,976 And I don'’t want you to take this the wrong way, 373 00:17:01,020 --> 00:17:02,586 but you can be judgmental, 374 00:17:02,630 --> 00:17:05,111 and I was afraid that you might not approve. 375 00:17:05,154 --> 00:17:07,374 Well, I don'’t.Well, I see that. 376 00:17:09,332 --> 00:17:12,727 You'’re, like, 25 years older than her. 377 00:17:12,770 --> 00:17:15,077 Aren'’t you embarrassed when you go out together? 378 00:17:15,121 --> 00:17:17,688 -Why would I be embarrassed? -I don'’t know, 379 00:17:17,732 --> 00:17:21,605 because you look like an old fool who'’s being taken advantage of. 380 00:17:21,649 --> 00:17:23,259 And people feel sorry for you. 381 00:17:23,303 --> 00:17:25,609 In my circles, I'’m a hero. 382 00:17:25,653 --> 00:17:29,135 Guys high-five me on the street. 383 00:17:29,178 --> 00:17:31,311 -Charlyne just did. -Yeah, well, that guy'’s a traitor. 384 00:17:31,354 --> 00:17:33,400 They say 50'’s the new 30. 385 00:17:34,792 --> 00:17:36,577 You'’re 54 and a half. 386 00:17:37,621 --> 00:17:39,841 I just never thought about you dating 387 00:17:39,884 --> 00:17:41,321 anyone, ever. 388 00:17:41,364 --> 00:17:44,628 Does it have to be now? Does it have to be her? 389 00:17:44,672 --> 00:17:46,848 -Could it be anyone but her? -Emma-- 390 00:17:46,891 --> 00:17:51,287 You should be dating someone your own age. Like Beatrice. 391 00:17:51,331 --> 00:17:54,290 Brandy makes me feel young. What'’s wrong with that? 392 00:17:54,334 --> 00:17:58,120 What'’s wrong with that is that you'’re not young. 393 00:17:58,164 --> 00:17:59,817 You have a bad back. 394 00:17:59,861 --> 00:18:01,471 It'’s only a matter of time before you hurt yourself 395 00:18:01,515 --> 00:18:03,560 doing some freaky sex shit. 396 00:18:03,604 --> 00:18:06,215 You two are total opposites. 397 00:18:06,259 --> 00:18:09,000 You'’ve had one job for 30 years. 398 00:18:09,044 --> 00:18:10,654 You married the love of your life. 399 00:18:10,698 --> 00:18:13,353 She spent the last year driving cross-country 400 00:18:13,396 --> 00:18:15,224 in a smoke-filled sex wagon 401 00:18:15,268 --> 00:18:16,834 with a bunch of sweaty dudes. 402 00:18:16,878 --> 00:18:18,271 I know this is overwhelming, 403 00:18:18,314 --> 00:18:21,274 but Brandy has brought a spark to my life 404 00:18:21,317 --> 00:18:22,797 that I really need. 405 00:18:22,840 --> 00:18:25,278 It may not last, but she makes me happy now. 406 00:18:25,321 --> 00:18:28,890 It'’s not that I don't want you to be happy, but... 407 00:18:28,933 --> 00:18:30,979 Just come spend the holidays with us. 408 00:18:31,022 --> 00:18:32,502 Just give her a chance. 409 00:18:33,938 --> 00:18:35,244 I don'’t know if I can. 410 00:18:35,288 --> 00:18:36,898 Well, just think about it. 411 00:18:36,941 --> 00:18:38,421 For me. 412 00:18:57,440 --> 00:19:00,139 [soft chatter] 413 00:19:01,357 --> 00:19:03,272 Dad and I have spent every Christmas together 414 00:19:03,316 --> 00:19:04,926 since I was born. 415 00:19:04,969 --> 00:19:06,797 We'’re each other's only family now. 416 00:19:08,234 --> 00:19:10,888 I don'’t think I can spend a week with him and Brandy. 417 00:19:11,976 --> 00:19:13,717 So, how do we avoid a bloodbath? 418 00:19:14,501 --> 00:19:16,981 -Booze? -Okay. 419 00:19:17,025 --> 00:19:21,160 Or you could take the high road, get through the week, 420 00:19:21,203 --> 00:19:24,119 and let the relationship fizzle out on its own. 421 00:19:27,905 --> 00:19:28,993 What? 422 00:19:30,038 --> 00:19:31,126 What? 423 00:19:35,957 --> 00:19:38,829 [laughing] 424 00:19:38,873 --> 00:19:41,180 I... I have to do something. 425 00:19:41,223 --> 00:19:44,226 If she and Dad don'’t see how wrong they are for each other, 426 00:19:44,270 --> 00:19:47,055 then I have no choice but to show them. 427 00:19:47,098 --> 00:19:49,492 Or you could be the bigger person 428 00:19:49,536 --> 00:19:52,930 and process your emotions like an adult and... 429 00:19:52,974 --> 00:19:55,542 Break them up. Yeah, I agree. 430 00:19:57,587 --> 00:19:59,023 I'’ll do it by Christmas. 431 00:19:59,067 --> 00:20:01,287 You got four days, kid. 432 00:20:01,330 --> 00:20:02,940 I can do it. 433 00:20:02,984 --> 00:20:06,335 God bless us, everyone. 434 00:20:07,423 --> 00:20:09,425 [sighing] 435 00:20:09,469 --> 00:20:12,602 [sleigh bells jingling] 436 00:20:22,873 --> 00:20:24,875 [big band Christmas music] 437 00:20:26,790 --> 00:20:28,705 What about It'’s a Wonderful Life? 438 00:20:28,749 --> 00:20:30,272 Oh, well, that'’s a classic, 439 00:20:30,316 --> 00:20:32,709 but now you like classics. 440 00:20:32,753 --> 00:20:34,233 -I do. -[chuckling] 441 00:20:34,276 --> 00:20:36,539 -[smooching] -Hey, guys. 442 00:20:36,583 --> 00:20:38,411 Happy holidays. 443 00:20:38,454 --> 00:20:39,629 [sighing] 444 00:20:39,673 --> 00:20:41,501 She came! [chuckling] 445 00:20:41,544 --> 00:20:43,677 I'’m so happy you're here! 446 00:20:43,720 --> 00:20:46,070 Me too. 447 00:20:46,114 --> 00:20:48,986 And I'’m sorry about the way I reacted the other day. 448 00:20:49,030 --> 00:20:52,599 Um... the news was just shocking. 449 00:20:52,642 --> 00:20:55,036 Yeah, I know. Listen, even if we aren'’t 450 00:20:55,079 --> 00:20:56,646 spending Christmas at the lake house, 451 00:20:56,690 --> 00:20:58,909 we can still do all the same stuff, right? 452 00:20:58,953 --> 00:21:02,304 Drinks at the country club. Our annual holiday party. 453 00:21:02,348 --> 00:21:04,306 Ice skating on the lake, if you want. 454 00:21:04,350 --> 00:21:06,265 Of course, it'’s tradition. 455 00:21:06,308 --> 00:21:08,832 Hi, welcome. [chuckling] 456 00:21:08,876 --> 00:21:11,139 To my own house? Thank you. 457 00:21:12,358 --> 00:21:14,534 I'’m sorry, that was rude, um... 458 00:21:15,491 --> 00:21:17,667 I wanted to apologize for 459 00:21:17,711 --> 00:21:19,930 calling you a widow-raper the other day. 460 00:21:19,974 --> 00:21:22,019 That'’s okay. 461 00:21:22,063 --> 00:21:23,847 Hey, fresh start. 462 00:21:27,198 --> 00:21:28,678 What?That... 463 00:21:30,419 --> 00:21:31,768 That'’s my mother's apron. 464 00:21:33,161 --> 00:21:35,772 You'’re wearing my dead mother'’s apron. 465 00:21:39,863 --> 00:21:41,691 Oh, shit. I didn'’t know. 466 00:21:41,735 --> 00:21:43,084 -Oh! -Oh! Emma! 467 00:21:43,127 --> 00:21:44,303 Wait, wait--Are you okay? 468 00:21:44,346 --> 00:21:45,782 No, no, no, don'’t touch me. 469 00:21:45,826 --> 00:21:47,741 Okay. 470 00:21:50,570 --> 00:21:52,136 Well, that'’s new. 471 00:21:52,180 --> 00:21:54,225 What, this? Yeah, well, yeah. 472 00:21:54,269 --> 00:21:56,445 Of course we moved a few things around. 473 00:21:57,620 --> 00:22:00,362 What is that thing? 474 00:22:04,758 --> 00:22:07,891 We went artificial this year '’cause Brandy has allergies. 475 00:22:07,935 --> 00:22:10,154 Sometimes I-- I get a little sneezy. 476 00:22:16,030 --> 00:22:17,988 Where are all my trophies? 477 00:22:18,032 --> 00:22:19,599 Um, they'’re right there. 478 00:22:19,642 --> 00:22:21,949 We were hoping you'’d take 'em home. 479 00:22:25,344 --> 00:22:27,389 -I-I need some air. -No, no, no, no, hey-- 480 00:22:28,782 --> 00:22:30,610 [door opening, slamming] 481 00:22:32,916 --> 00:22:36,180 [phone ringing] 482 00:22:36,224 --> 00:22:38,879 [phone continues ringing] 483 00:22:52,719 --> 00:22:55,722 [phone ringing] 484 00:22:55,765 --> 00:22:58,681 [phone continues ringing] 485 00:23:11,390 --> 00:23:13,957 [bartender shaking drinks] 486 00:23:15,524 --> 00:23:17,308 [sighing] 487 00:23:20,181 --> 00:23:21,835 What can I get ya, doll? 488 00:23:23,489 --> 00:23:26,709 What I don'’t need is some kind of old-timey hipster slang. 489 00:23:27,536 --> 00:23:28,972 Not in the mood, newsie cap. 490 00:23:30,321 --> 00:23:32,411 Just a friendly gesture, ma'’am. 491 00:23:33,455 --> 00:23:35,065 Vodka tonic. 492 00:23:35,109 --> 00:23:36,806 Coming right up. 493 00:23:43,813 --> 00:23:45,728 [dispensing tonic] 494 00:23:46,729 --> 00:23:48,601 Here you are.Thanks. 495 00:23:49,776 --> 00:23:52,648 Sorry, it'’s just been a rough night. 496 00:23:52,692 --> 00:23:54,433 That'’s what we're here for. 497 00:23:54,476 --> 00:23:55,695 Port in a storm. 498 00:23:57,218 --> 00:24:00,830 God, who-- who says stuff like that? 499 00:24:00,874 --> 00:24:02,397 You know what? I'’ll tell you who. 500 00:24:02,441 --> 00:24:04,007 Pretty people who think they can get away 501 00:24:04,051 --> 00:24:05,835 with anything they want 502 00:24:05,879 --> 00:24:08,664 at regular people'’s expense. 503 00:24:08,708 --> 00:24:10,231 I'’m just saying, you would never be able 504 00:24:10,274 --> 00:24:12,320 to get away with a phrase like "port in the storm" 505 00:24:12,363 --> 00:24:14,670 if you didn'’t look like that. 506 00:24:14,714 --> 00:24:16,063 Look like what? 507 00:24:19,545 --> 00:24:22,896 Okay, that'’s gonna be $8. 508 00:24:32,732 --> 00:24:35,952 Emma Lockhart? Holy shit. 509 00:24:35,996 --> 00:24:37,650 You used to be Brandy Barnes'’ next-door neighbor, 510 00:24:37,693 --> 00:24:40,304 -right? -Yep. 511 00:24:40,348 --> 00:24:42,263 Josh Jamison. Jay-mo! 512 00:24:42,306 --> 00:24:44,004 From high school. I used to date Brandy. 513 00:24:44,047 --> 00:24:46,789 [chuckling] Oh, hey. 514 00:24:46,833 --> 00:24:48,225 Josh.Yeah! 515 00:24:48,269 --> 00:24:50,140 -Shot of tequila. -That'’s more like it. 516 00:24:50,184 --> 00:24:51,794 I'’ll join you. 517 00:24:52,795 --> 00:24:54,754 How long has it been? 518 00:24:54,797 --> 00:24:56,103 Long enough.Cheers. 519 00:24:57,234 --> 00:24:59,976 Old times.Old times. 520 00:25:02,152 --> 00:25:03,893 Whoo.Yeah. 521 00:25:03,937 --> 00:25:05,416 You home for the holidays? 522 00:25:06,766 --> 00:25:07,941 Yeah. 523 00:25:09,246 --> 00:25:11,292 And get this, uh, 524 00:25:11,335 --> 00:25:13,816 I'’m actually gonna be spending it with Brandy. 525 00:25:13,860 --> 00:25:16,340 Get out, really?Yeah. 526 00:25:16,384 --> 00:25:18,691 She'’s dating my father. 527 00:25:18,734 --> 00:25:20,344 Wha-- [chuckling] 528 00:25:20,388 --> 00:25:21,868 Wait, like "dating" dating? 529 00:25:22,825 --> 00:25:25,001 -Like "dating" dating. -No! 530 00:25:25,045 --> 00:25:26,307 How sick is that? 531 00:25:26,873 --> 00:25:28,135 Wow. 532 00:25:29,223 --> 00:25:30,833 You would totally high-five him 533 00:25:30,877 --> 00:25:32,922 if he were here right now, wouldn'’t you? 534 00:25:32,966 --> 00:25:35,577 If it felt right.Welp, I'’m just gonna be 535 00:25:35,621 --> 00:25:39,320 trapped in my dad'’s house like The Shining. 536 00:25:40,843 --> 00:25:43,585 I'’m sorry, I do feel like that would be kind of weird for ya. 537 00:25:43,629 --> 00:25:45,761 -[scoffs] Right? Thank you. -But on the bright side, 538 00:25:45,805 --> 00:25:47,502 it'’s only a couple of days, right? 539 00:25:47,546 --> 00:25:48,895 You'’ll get through it. 540 00:25:50,374 --> 00:25:52,725 I don'’t know. Tomorrow night, 541 00:25:52,768 --> 00:25:54,901 we'’re supposed to go out with my dad'’s golfing buddies, 542 00:25:54,944 --> 00:25:56,511 which... is usually fun, 543 00:25:56,555 --> 00:25:59,383 -because they'’re like my uncles. -Uh-huh. 544 00:25:59,427 --> 00:26:01,385 Now it'’s just gonna suck. 545 00:26:02,909 --> 00:26:05,651 -I just have to stay focused. -Focused on what? 546 00:26:10,873 --> 00:26:12,832 Do you wanna join us tomorrow? 547 00:26:14,921 --> 00:26:16,618 Are you asking me on a date? 548 00:26:16,662 --> 00:26:18,751 Yeah, kinda. 549 00:26:19,665 --> 00:26:22,015 -Uh... -No, not really. 550 00:26:22,058 --> 00:26:23,930 But... 551 00:26:23,973 --> 00:26:25,932 if my dad'’s gonna bring the ditzy party girl, 552 00:26:25,975 --> 00:26:28,369 then I might as well bring the meathead bartender 553 00:26:28,412 --> 00:26:30,240 and see how he likes it. 554 00:26:30,284 --> 00:26:31,285 Gotcha. 555 00:26:32,155 --> 00:26:34,201 Normally I do like being used 556 00:26:34,244 --> 00:26:36,638 as a pawn in a crazy chick'’s revenge fantasy 557 00:26:36,682 --> 00:26:38,814 because that means mind-blowing sex. 558 00:26:38,858 --> 00:26:41,730 But in this case, I think I'’m gonna pass. 559 00:26:41,774 --> 00:26:44,559 -Thank you, though. -Okay, wait, um, 560 00:26:44,603 --> 00:26:47,214 -what if you come with me tomorrow? -Okay. 561 00:26:47,257 --> 00:26:50,043 And my dad and I throw our Christmas party here on Friday? 562 00:26:50,086 --> 00:26:52,393 Tons of tips.So you wanna buy me? 563 00:26:52,436 --> 00:26:55,831 -Like a whore. -The Pretty Womankind. 564 00:26:55,875 --> 00:26:58,094 There is no Pretty Womankind. 565 00:26:59,443 --> 00:27:00,619 Okay. 566 00:27:00,662 --> 00:27:02,359 Hear me out.Okay. 567 00:27:03,883 --> 00:27:06,799 I will guarantee you a $2,000 bar tab. 568 00:27:06,842 --> 00:27:08,670 -Everyone needs money, right? -Guarantee? 569 00:27:08,714 --> 00:27:10,716 -Yeah. -You hear this, Ant? 570 00:27:10,759 --> 00:27:13,501 -Sounds pretty good. -Mmm. 571 00:27:13,544 --> 00:27:15,764 I have been saving up for a new camera. 572 00:27:15,808 --> 00:27:17,374 For high-resolution dick pics? 573 00:27:18,680 --> 00:27:19,899 Environmental portraiture. 574 00:27:21,552 --> 00:27:23,206 Hmm. That'’s cute. 575 00:27:23,250 --> 00:27:25,034 That'’s condescending. 576 00:27:27,950 --> 00:27:29,909 Okay, look. 577 00:27:29,952 --> 00:27:31,388 I wanna make a point to my dad. 578 00:27:31,432 --> 00:27:32,912 Uh-huh.And you want a new camera. 579 00:27:32,955 --> 00:27:36,263 It'’s a simple transaction. Do we have a deal? 580 00:27:41,442 --> 00:27:42,878 Uh, no, don'’t do that. 581 00:27:42,922 --> 00:27:44,663 [both chuckling] 582 00:27:46,360 --> 00:27:47,709 Eh, what the hell. 583 00:27:47,753 --> 00:27:49,929 Screw it, I'’ll be your whore. 584 00:27:49,972 --> 00:27:51,931 Besides, I wouldn'’t mind seeing how Brandy'’s boobs have 585 00:27:51,974 --> 00:27:54,194 held up after all these years. 586 00:27:55,369 --> 00:27:57,676 Pig, I can'’t believe I--You what? 587 00:28:00,330 --> 00:28:01,592 To be clear,Uh-huh? 588 00:28:01,636 --> 00:28:04,683 -I am not interested in you. -Mmm. 589 00:28:04,726 --> 00:28:09,252 '’Cause it takes a lot more than karaoke-ing Kid Rock to get me in bed these days. 590 00:28:09,296 --> 00:28:12,908 Is that line pretty long? To get you in bed? 591 00:28:12,952 --> 00:28:14,431 I have a boyfriend. 592 00:28:14,475 --> 00:28:15,781 No, you don'’t. 593 00:28:17,043 --> 00:28:19,132 Otherwise you wouldn'’t be asking me to do this. 594 00:28:21,134 --> 00:28:22,526 Another shot? 595 00:28:23,789 --> 00:28:24,964 Yeah. 596 00:28:25,834 --> 00:28:27,401 Emma Lockhart. 597 00:28:28,750 --> 00:28:30,099 In the flesh. 598 00:28:30,143 --> 00:28:32,101 [sleigh bells jingling] 599 00:28:32,145 --> 00:28:34,582 So, what are we doing here? 600 00:28:34,625 --> 00:28:36,845 I figured that we could use some alone time together, 601 00:28:36,889 --> 00:28:39,326 so I made us some appointments. 602 00:28:39,369 --> 00:28:41,154 What kind of appointments? 603 00:28:42,677 --> 00:28:44,287 [bell jingling] 604 00:28:44,331 --> 00:28:46,376 I thought that we would get our makeup done 605 00:28:46,420 --> 00:28:47,769 for the country club tonight. 606 00:28:47,813 --> 00:28:49,771 Oh, really? 607 00:28:49,815 --> 00:28:51,904 Wow, that'’s so nice of you. 608 00:28:51,947 --> 00:28:53,557 Yeah, I guess we do have a lot 609 00:28:53,601 --> 00:28:56,473 -to catch up on, too. -Hello, ladies! 610 00:28:56,517 --> 00:28:58,824 You here for your appointments? 611 00:28:58,867 --> 00:29:00,390 -How fun! -Whoa. 612 00:29:00,434 --> 00:29:01,827 Oh! Are you two sisters? 613 00:29:01,870 --> 00:29:04,568 -God no. -Why would you think that? 614 00:29:04,612 --> 00:29:06,701 [chuckling] Okay... 615 00:29:06,745 --> 00:29:08,224 let'’s get started. 616 00:29:08,268 --> 00:29:09,748 -So perky. -[laughing] 617 00:29:10,879 --> 00:29:12,533 I'’ll be right with you. 618 00:29:12,576 --> 00:29:14,578 Roberta! 619 00:29:17,059 --> 00:29:19,714 [sighing] He is so sexy. 620 00:29:19,758 --> 00:29:21,977 I wanna do dirty things to him. 621 00:29:22,021 --> 00:29:24,284 -Me too! -Filthy. 622 00:29:24,327 --> 00:29:26,329 -[sighing] -You know, I don'’t understand, 623 00:29:26,373 --> 00:29:27,853 how can you wanna do filthy things 624 00:29:27,896 --> 00:29:29,768 with Ryan Gosling and my dad? 625 00:29:29,811 --> 00:29:31,987 Oh, they'’re both sexy in different ways. 626 00:29:33,859 --> 00:29:35,817 Are you screwing my dad for his money? 627 00:29:35,861 --> 00:29:37,297 [nervous chuckle] 628 00:29:37,340 --> 00:29:39,081 You know, my dad invented the key fob, 629 00:29:39,125 --> 00:29:40,648 so I have a trust fund, 630 00:29:40,691 --> 00:29:42,476 not that I'’ve ever taken a single cent of it, 631 00:29:42,519 --> 00:29:45,958 because I'’ve always taken care of myself, so no, wrong. 632 00:29:46,001 --> 00:29:48,395 Okay, so... 633 00:29:48,438 --> 00:29:50,832 your dad set up a trust fund because he felt guilty 634 00:29:50,876 --> 00:29:53,182 about breaking up your family so now you'’re looking 635 00:29:53,226 --> 00:29:55,315 -for a new daddy? -[laughing] 636 00:29:55,358 --> 00:29:57,056 You'’re saying that I have daddy issues? 637 00:29:57,099 --> 00:30:00,624 Wow, isn'’t that the skunk calling the rose stinky? 638 00:30:00,668 --> 00:30:02,061 It means your shit stinks. 639 00:30:02,104 --> 00:30:03,802 Your shit stinks.I don'’t shit. 640 00:30:05,847 --> 00:30:08,502 Look, I spent most of my 20s dating 641 00:30:08,545 --> 00:30:11,766 self-centered man-children who cheated on me. 642 00:30:11,810 --> 00:30:13,637 Your dad is honest. 643 00:30:13,681 --> 00:30:16,162 Strong. He'’s sweet and funny. 644 00:30:16,205 --> 00:30:19,165 Funny? You know, I'’ll give you the rest, 645 00:30:19,208 --> 00:30:21,080 but the last thing my dad is is funny. 646 00:30:21,123 --> 00:30:23,256 Well, maybe you don'’t know him as well as you think you do. 647 00:30:23,299 --> 00:30:26,694 I know him better than he knows himself. You know nothing. 648 00:30:29,218 --> 00:30:31,003 Do you have some fetish for old guys? 649 00:30:31,046 --> 00:30:33,048 Like a chubby chaser kind of thing? 650 00:30:33,092 --> 00:30:34,223 You wanna hop on pop? 651 00:30:37,748 --> 00:30:41,056 Your father is a spectacular lover. 652 00:30:42,101 --> 00:30:43,842 Would you like me to go on? 653 00:30:45,931 --> 00:30:46,932 No. 654 00:30:47,497 --> 00:30:48,629 Okay. 655 00:30:48,672 --> 00:30:49,848 Good talk. 656 00:30:52,546 --> 00:30:54,287 -Holy shit-- -This half of the face-- 657 00:30:54,330 --> 00:30:55,897 It'’ll be done, trust me. 658 00:30:55,941 --> 00:30:58,508 -Okay. -I just wanted to give you a little glimpse! 659 00:30:58,552 --> 00:31:01,424 [hip-hop music] 660 00:31:01,468 --> 00:31:03,426 ♪ Pow pow pow Back for me, boy♪ 661 00:31:03,470 --> 00:31:06,125 ♪ I'’m tryna tryna tryna tryna Pop for ya, boy, listen♪ 662 00:31:06,168 --> 00:31:08,170 ♪ Let me let me look Back at ya, boy, yeah♪ 663 00:31:08,214 --> 00:31:10,781 ♪ Pop for the boy, yeah You the one, boy, listen♪ 664 00:31:10,825 --> 00:31:12,871 ♪ Pow pow pow Back for me, boy♪ 665 00:31:12,914 --> 00:31:15,525 ♪ I'’m tryna tryna tryna tryna Pop for ya, boy, yeah♪ 666 00:31:15,569 --> 00:31:17,658 ♪ Let me let me look Back at ya, boy, yeah♪ 667 00:31:17,701 --> 00:31:19,703 ♪ Pop for the boy, yeah You the one, boy, listen♪ 668 00:31:19,747 --> 00:31:22,271 ♪ Get what I want Get what I want, boy, listen♪ 669 00:31:22,315 --> 00:31:24,665 ♪ Get what I want Get what I want, get it get it♪ 670 00:31:24,708 --> 00:31:26,928 ♪ Get what I want Get what I want, boy, yeah♪ 671 00:31:26,972 --> 00:31:29,191 ♪ Get what I want Get what I want, get it get it♪ 672 00:31:29,235 --> 00:31:31,933 We look like a Russian kingpin and his high-class hookers. 673 00:31:31,977 --> 00:31:33,848 Good evening, sir. 674 00:31:33,892 --> 00:31:35,458 Cool T-shirt. 675 00:31:35,502 --> 00:31:37,330 It'’s nice to see you and your 676 00:31:37,373 --> 00:31:40,333 daugh-- Nie-- Sister? 677 00:31:40,376 --> 00:31:41,900 -I'’m his daughter. -Right. 678 00:31:41,943 --> 00:31:44,511 -She'’s boning him. -[Jack] Language, monkey. 679 00:31:44,554 --> 00:31:46,382 [whispering] Let'’s hope she doesn't get it on 680 00:31:46,426 --> 00:31:49,124 -in the bathroom. -[chuckling] Let'’s. 681 00:31:49,168 --> 00:31:50,909 [Jack] Let'’s meet the mayor first. 682 00:31:53,259 --> 00:31:55,130 Mr. Hackett. Mr. Murphy. 683 00:31:55,174 --> 00:31:56,740 -Hi. -Oh, look at you. 684 00:31:56,784 --> 00:31:58,133 All grown up. 685 00:31:58,177 --> 00:31:59,830 There'’s my girl. How are ya? 686 00:31:59,874 --> 00:32:01,571 Good. Mr. Portnoy. 687 00:32:01,615 --> 00:32:03,965 Oh, you look wonderful. 688 00:32:04,009 --> 00:32:06,359 I hear you'’re doing great things at the company. 689 00:32:06,402 --> 00:32:07,969 Oh, thank you, yeah, Dad and I-- 690 00:32:08,013 --> 00:32:10,102 Tom. Hey, Elliott. 691 00:32:10,145 --> 00:32:12,887 It'’s been an interesting couple of days. 692 00:32:12,931 --> 00:32:15,368 -Hello, gorgeous. -Looking good, Brandy. 693 00:32:15,411 --> 00:32:18,371 Jack, how did you manage to land a girl like Brandy? 694 00:32:18,414 --> 00:32:21,330 -[chuckling] -And how can I steal her away from you? 695 00:32:21,374 --> 00:32:23,071 I sure am grateful, every day. 696 00:32:23,115 --> 00:32:26,205 Aw, it'’s easy. Jack is a great person. 697 00:32:26,248 --> 00:32:30,209 -Cares about his family and his friends. -Mmm. 698 00:32:30,252 --> 00:32:33,038 Hey, I'’m here to see Emma Lockhart. 699 00:32:33,081 --> 00:32:34,996 Oh, that'’s a bit of a buzzkill, 700 00:32:35,040 --> 00:32:37,303 but she'’s right over there. 701 00:32:37,346 --> 00:32:39,696 Let me know if you need anything else. 702 00:32:43,831 --> 00:32:44,963 [clears throat] 703 00:32:47,095 --> 00:32:48,140 Hey. 704 00:32:50,055 --> 00:32:51,621 You look like you 705 00:32:51,665 --> 00:32:53,623 came from a John Wickconvention. 706 00:32:53,667 --> 00:32:55,886 -Thank you. -Um, I can'’t believe I'’m saying this, 707 00:32:55,930 --> 00:32:57,453 but I am so glad that you'’re here right now. 708 00:32:57,497 --> 00:32:59,803 -You did bribe me to come. -"To-may-to," "to-mah-to." 709 00:32:59,847 --> 00:33:01,805 Okay, so here'’s the deal. 710 00:33:01,849 --> 00:33:04,460 Apparently, Brandy has every guy in a ten-mile radius 711 00:33:04,504 --> 00:33:06,897 under some sort of T&A mind control, 712 00:33:06,941 --> 00:33:10,379 including my dad, but you'’re here now, and you'’re my Brandy, 713 00:33:10,423 --> 00:33:13,121 so we just have to give him a taste of his own medicine. 714 00:33:13,165 --> 00:33:15,123 And you didn'’t have to dress up so nice, but it'’s okay, 715 00:33:15,167 --> 00:33:16,559 he'’s gonna hate you anyway. 716 00:33:16,603 --> 00:33:18,344 I wouldn'’t count on him hating me. 717 00:33:18,387 --> 00:33:19,606 So here'’s the plan. 718 00:33:19,649 --> 00:33:21,521 My dad is very goal-oriented. 719 00:33:21,564 --> 00:33:24,045 He'’s big on achievement, and, you know, 720 00:33:24,089 --> 00:33:25,655 you have a dead-end job and no prospects, 721 00:33:25,699 --> 00:33:27,570 and you used to drive a foreign car, so... 722 00:33:27,614 --> 00:33:30,051 Do you normally get what you want out of people? 723 00:33:30,095 --> 00:33:31,705 No, but it'’s wartime, so, 724 00:33:31,748 --> 00:33:33,750 you know, people do crazy things. Hey, Dad? 725 00:33:33,794 --> 00:33:35,448 -Oh? -You remember Josh Jamison, right? 726 00:33:35,491 --> 00:33:37,058 The D-student who used to block your driveway 727 00:33:37,102 --> 00:33:38,494 -with his Toyota? -That'’s me. 728 00:33:38,538 --> 00:33:40,018 I think so. Hey, Josh. 729 00:33:40,061 --> 00:33:42,498 -Hey. -Well, anyway, 730 00:33:42,542 --> 00:33:44,065 Josh and I reconnected the other night, 731 00:33:44,109 --> 00:33:46,633 and, I don'’t know, sparks flew. 732 00:33:46,676 --> 00:33:49,375 Honey.Josh works as a bartender now. 733 00:33:49,418 --> 00:33:51,986 Oh. Do you garnish your Manhattans 734 00:33:52,030 --> 00:33:53,466 with maraschino cherries? 735 00:33:53,509 --> 00:33:56,382 Not unless that'’s a euphemism for a sex act. 736 00:33:56,425 --> 00:33:59,080 Oh! [laughing] Good man. 737 00:33:59,124 --> 00:34:01,909 -What can I get ya? -Bourbon, straight-up. 738 00:34:01,952 --> 00:34:03,780 -Bourbon, straight-up. -Yeah. 739 00:34:03,824 --> 00:34:06,522 What the hell?I mean, we'’re like two silverback gorillas. 740 00:34:06,566 --> 00:34:08,959 We recognize each other in nature. 741 00:34:09,003 --> 00:34:10,570 Mmm, Josh. 742 00:34:10,613 --> 00:34:13,355 So, Josh and I were thinking about taking a road trip. 743 00:34:13,399 --> 00:34:14,748 You know, meander around, 744 00:34:14,791 --> 00:34:16,880 find ourselves, pierce some stuff. 745 00:34:16,924 --> 00:34:18,795 -I don'’t know, go to Coachella. -Mmm. 746 00:34:18,839 --> 00:34:20,145 You should. 747 00:34:20,188 --> 00:34:21,450 You know, I never did enough traveling 748 00:34:21,494 --> 00:34:23,322 when I was young like Josh. 749 00:34:23,365 --> 00:34:25,150 Emma here, she works too hard. 750 00:34:25,193 --> 00:34:26,934 -Mmm. -Probably got that from me, 751 00:34:26,977 --> 00:34:29,850 but Brandy'’s been really helping me relax lately. 752 00:34:29,893 --> 00:34:31,808 It'’s made me so much happier. 753 00:34:31,852 --> 00:34:34,637 Who knew that I'’d still be finding myself at this age 754 00:34:34,681 --> 00:34:36,726 and that I'’m still finding life so surprising-- 755 00:34:36,770 --> 00:34:38,554 Oh, there'’s Brandy! Hi, Brandy! 756 00:34:38,598 --> 00:34:41,035 Oh, your dad'’s great. 757 00:34:42,210 --> 00:34:45,822 She'’s lulled him into some kind of poontang fog. 758 00:34:45,866 --> 00:34:47,346 Fog of whore. 759 00:34:48,260 --> 00:34:50,131 I don'’t know, some bartender. 760 00:34:51,567 --> 00:34:53,874 [whispering to each other] 761 00:34:55,876 --> 00:34:57,443 Are you ready for round two? 762 00:34:57,486 --> 00:34:59,140 I was born ready. 763 00:34:59,184 --> 00:35:01,751 -Oh, shut up. -Wow, really? 764 00:35:01,795 --> 00:35:03,057 -Oh. -Huh! 765 00:35:03,101 --> 00:35:05,015 Josh Jamison. 766 00:35:05,059 --> 00:35:06,756 -Brandy Barnes. -Come here. 767 00:35:06,800 --> 00:35:08,889 -Hi, babe. -How'’re you doing, baby? 768 00:35:08,932 --> 00:35:10,325 You'’re really wearing that suit. 769 00:35:10,369 --> 00:35:11,892 Oh, and you in that dress. 770 00:35:11,935 --> 00:35:15,156 Remind me again, why on Earth did we break up? 771 00:35:15,200 --> 00:35:17,680 I obviously made a huge mistake. 772 00:35:17,724 --> 00:35:20,074 Oh, yeah, you definitely did. 773 00:35:20,118 --> 00:35:22,859 -Ooh, someone'’s been working out. -Stop. 774 00:35:22,903 --> 00:35:25,166 Hey, so are you still doing the whole photography thing? 775 00:35:25,210 --> 00:35:27,342 -I am. -Wow, well, do you ever shoot bands? 776 00:35:27,386 --> 00:35:29,475 Because, um, I'’m putting together 777 00:35:29,518 --> 00:35:32,173 a little New Year'’s Eve concert and we could really use a photographer. 778 00:35:32,217 --> 00:35:33,609 That'’d be great, yeah. 779 00:35:33,653 --> 00:35:35,263 I could definitely do that. I'’ll text you. 780 00:35:35,307 --> 00:35:36,786 I'’ll text you. 781 00:35:36,830 --> 00:35:38,005 -Great. -Great. 782 00:35:38,048 --> 00:35:39,920 -Great. -Great. Hey, guys. 783 00:35:39,963 --> 00:35:41,443 Oh, babe, you met Josh, Emma'’s date. 784 00:35:41,487 --> 00:35:43,053 Oh, Dad, she knows. 785 00:35:43,097 --> 00:35:46,622 Actually, Josh is one of Brandy'’s ex-boyfriends. 786 00:35:46,666 --> 00:35:48,015 -Yes, that'’s right. -Yeah, yeah. 787 00:35:48,058 --> 00:35:49,843 You'’re the man from her past 788 00:35:49,886 --> 00:35:51,888 that I'’ve got to live up to? The one who got away? 789 00:35:51,932 --> 00:35:54,369 [laughing] Oh, God, no. 790 00:35:54,413 --> 00:35:56,371 No, no, no, no, we were kids. 791 00:35:56,415 --> 00:35:59,331 He was a boy. And you'’re my man. 792 00:35:59,374 --> 00:36:00,984 I'’m a man, too, believe me. 793 00:36:01,028 --> 00:36:04,031 But you gotta admit, this is kind of weird, right? 794 00:36:04,074 --> 00:36:07,208 I mean, Josh is my date. I'’m your daughter. 795 00:36:07,252 --> 00:36:10,037 You'’re her boyfriend, and she'’s Josh's ex. 796 00:36:11,256 --> 00:36:13,475 Kind of funny. 797 00:36:13,519 --> 00:36:15,173 -Right? -[chuckling] 798 00:36:15,216 --> 00:36:16,739 [Christmas music starts playing] 799 00:36:16,783 --> 00:36:18,393 -Dance with me! -Oh, sure. 800 00:36:18,437 --> 00:36:19,873 I made it a rule. Never say no to her. 801 00:36:19,916 --> 00:36:21,353 -You know why, Josh. -Of course not. 802 00:36:21,396 --> 00:36:23,268 -[Josh] Smart man. -Yep. 803 00:36:23,311 --> 00:36:25,400 [Josh] Wow. 804 00:36:25,444 --> 00:36:27,228 [Emma] We'’re dancing. 805 00:36:27,272 --> 00:36:29,317 Okay, I guess we'’re doing this now. 806 00:36:35,541 --> 00:36:38,631 Hey, I hope you know, I really am trying. 807 00:36:38,674 --> 00:36:41,068 Oh, I know. I really appreciate it. 808 00:36:41,111 --> 00:36:43,375 I think she just needs a little time. 809 00:36:43,418 --> 00:36:45,290 Yeah. Come here. 810 00:36:51,383 --> 00:36:53,472 Ow! Okay. 811 00:36:53,515 --> 00:36:55,256 What are we doing here? 812 00:36:55,300 --> 00:36:57,519 I'’m just trying to make the show a little more convincing. 813 00:36:57,563 --> 00:37:00,870 -[whispering indistinctly] -Very nice. 814 00:37:00,914 --> 00:37:03,482 Some participation from you would help. 815 00:37:03,525 --> 00:37:06,224 I thought my part'’s just letting you fondle me. 816 00:37:06,876 --> 00:37:08,095 I got it. 817 00:37:09,444 --> 00:37:11,577 That'’s nice, yes. 818 00:37:11,620 --> 00:37:12,969 There, you got it. 819 00:37:13,013 --> 00:37:14,667 [laughing] 820 00:37:17,713 --> 00:37:19,933 Oh, my God, they'’re looking. I'’m trying to make a point. 821 00:37:19,976 --> 00:37:22,675 Would you just help me out here?Yes, yes. 822 00:37:28,158 --> 00:37:30,378 Oh, my God, kill me. 823 00:37:30,422 --> 00:37:32,772 Let'’s just give 'em a second. 824 00:37:32,815 --> 00:37:34,426 -Probably the wrong move. -Yep. 825 00:37:34,469 --> 00:37:36,689 -Okay, I'’m sorry. Um, that was bad. -Yep. 826 00:38:02,541 --> 00:38:04,151 [line ringing] 827 00:38:04,194 --> 00:38:06,153 I'’m sorry, I'’m sorry, hold on. 828 00:38:06,196 --> 00:38:07,807 Hold on, hold on, hold on. 829 00:38:09,374 --> 00:38:12,377 Let me guess, the sabotage isn'’t going according to plan. 830 00:38:12,420 --> 00:38:14,857 That'’s an understatement. 831 00:38:14,901 --> 00:38:18,513 No, no matter how hard I try to undermine Brandy and Dad, 832 00:38:18,557 --> 00:38:21,037 they somehow rise above it. 833 00:38:21,081 --> 00:38:24,389 I even brought Brandy'’s ex-boyfriend to dinner, and he'’s so... 834 00:38:24,432 --> 00:38:27,130 -Back up, you did what? -Never mind. 835 00:38:27,174 --> 00:38:31,352 You know, I may have lost the battle tonight, but tomorrow is a new day. 836 00:38:31,396 --> 00:38:33,876 And it will be filled with family traditions 837 00:38:33,920 --> 00:38:36,575 that will remind Brandy that Dad and I are a unit. 838 00:38:36,618 --> 00:38:38,664 She'’s the third wheel. 839 00:38:38,707 --> 00:38:42,798 Okay, so you'’re gonna use your childhood memories for evil? 840 00:38:42,842 --> 00:38:44,757 No. She can'’t just show up on Christmas 841 00:38:44,800 --> 00:38:46,367 and wave her magic tits around 842 00:38:46,411 --> 00:38:48,369 and think she'’s instantly part of this family. 843 00:38:48,413 --> 00:38:50,066 I'’ve earned my spot. 844 00:38:50,110 --> 00:38:52,591 Well, you were sort of born into it. 845 00:38:52,634 --> 00:38:55,028 You should'’ve seen her, Charlyne. 846 00:38:55,071 --> 00:38:58,901 Cooking dinner in my childhood home like she'’s my mother. 847 00:38:58,945 --> 00:39:00,816 And then trying to be my friend. 848 00:39:00,860 --> 00:39:03,036 And then flirting with my date 849 00:39:03,079 --> 00:39:05,168 in my face. 850 00:39:05,212 --> 00:39:07,997 I'’m sorry, what is it that you'’re mad about right now? 851 00:39:08,781 --> 00:39:10,260 All of it. 852 00:39:13,263 --> 00:39:15,309 Will you come over Christmas Day? 853 00:39:15,353 --> 00:39:17,355 I don'’t know if I can handle it alone. 854 00:39:17,398 --> 00:39:19,313 No-- I don'’t do well with family drama. 855 00:39:19,357 --> 00:39:21,315 That'’s why I'm not spending the holidays with mine. 856 00:39:21,359 --> 00:39:24,492 I can never pick a side. Drunks versus racists. 857 00:39:25,798 --> 00:39:27,582 I know it'’s a lot to ask. 858 00:39:28,496 --> 00:39:29,758 But I guess I'’m asking. 859 00:39:29,802 --> 00:39:31,281 [groaning] 860 00:39:31,325 --> 00:39:33,414 If it'’ll help put an end to this whole thing 861 00:39:33,458 --> 00:39:35,677 and end this phone call, I will do it. 862 00:39:36,852 --> 00:39:39,289 It will, I promise. I love you. 863 00:39:39,333 --> 00:39:41,814 Okay, love you, bye. I'’m so sorry. 864 00:39:46,732 --> 00:39:47,776 [beeping] 865 00:39:49,778 --> 00:39:51,911 [sleigh bells jingling] 866 00:39:54,130 --> 00:39:55,218 Who wore them better? 867 00:39:55,262 --> 00:39:57,960 Yeah, well, clearly I did. 868 00:39:58,004 --> 00:40:00,093 If I don'’t look good, you don'’t look good. 869 00:40:00,136 --> 00:40:01,877 [laughing] 870 00:40:03,836 --> 00:40:06,012 Oh, what'’s all this? 871 00:40:06,055 --> 00:40:08,536 Just your standard uniform for cookie baking 872 00:40:08,580 --> 00:40:10,320 -and tree decorating day. -Oh. 873 00:40:10,364 --> 00:40:12,627 -Mmm. -I didn'’t get the memo. 874 00:40:12,671 --> 00:40:14,629 This tastes just like your mom'’s. 875 00:40:14,673 --> 00:40:16,414 They'’re not as good as hers, but... 876 00:40:17,850 --> 00:40:21,244 Wow, cookies for breakfast. 877 00:40:21,288 --> 00:40:24,509 Thank you. Usually I'’d be getting the spins around this time of day. 878 00:40:24,552 --> 00:40:25,901 Coffee.Mmm-hmm. 879 00:40:27,120 --> 00:40:29,209 Oh, there are mugs too? That'’s cute. 880 00:40:31,037 --> 00:40:32,473 Sorry, only two. 881 00:40:35,476 --> 00:40:36,564 Here you go. 882 00:40:40,873 --> 00:40:43,441 Mmm, let'’s decorate that tree. 883 00:40:44,833 --> 00:40:46,182 Perfect. 884 00:41:00,719 --> 00:41:03,025 Oh, we can'’t forget these ones. 885 00:41:04,287 --> 00:41:05,375 Oh... 886 00:41:05,419 --> 00:41:07,377 How adorable is this? 887 00:41:07,421 --> 00:41:10,250 -[chuckling] -That'’s one of my favorites. 888 00:41:10,293 --> 00:41:12,513 Aw, I don'’t remember making anything like that growing up, 889 00:41:12,557 --> 00:41:16,299 but I guess we were more of a tinsel family. 890 00:41:16,343 --> 00:41:18,954 Don'’t worry. I got us an ornament too. 891 00:41:18,998 --> 00:41:20,521 Here, look. 892 00:41:20,565 --> 00:41:21,827 Thank you. 893 00:41:21,870 --> 00:41:22,958 -You like it? -Yes! 894 00:41:23,002 --> 00:41:24,612 -Nice, right? -[grunts] 895 00:41:24,656 --> 00:41:26,571 Here. Here. Come on, let'’s hang it up. 896 00:41:26,614 --> 00:41:29,095 -Near the top. -Okay, okay, give me a boost. 897 00:41:29,138 --> 00:41:31,401 [squealing, laughing] 898 00:41:31,445 --> 00:41:33,316 -Perfect. -I love it. 899 00:41:33,360 --> 00:41:34,579 Thank you, babe. 900 00:41:34,622 --> 00:41:36,189 -Look at that. -It'’s beautiful. 901 00:41:36,232 --> 00:41:37,930 [clears throat] 902 00:41:38,974 --> 00:41:40,846 All right, it'’s photo album time. 903 00:41:44,763 --> 00:41:47,635 -So cute. Wait, wait. -[chuckling] 904 00:41:50,595 --> 00:41:51,987 Oh... 905 00:41:55,077 --> 00:41:57,123 -Remember that? -Yeah. 906 00:41:57,166 --> 00:41:58,777 [both laughing] 907 00:41:58,820 --> 00:42:00,343 [both] Oh. 908 00:42:00,387 --> 00:42:01,649 You have to give us credit. 909 00:42:01,693 --> 00:42:03,129 We really landed our single axel. 910 00:42:03,172 --> 00:42:05,740 Yeah, but then you totally wiped out 911 00:42:05,784 --> 00:42:07,916 -in spectacular fashion. -[chuckling] 912 00:42:10,484 --> 00:42:12,573 I really love that lake house. 913 00:42:12,617 --> 00:42:14,009 Such great memories there. 914 00:42:14,053 --> 00:42:15,794 Yeah. 915 00:42:17,709 --> 00:42:20,581 Oh, I'’m sorry, maybe this isn'’t the best time. 916 00:42:20,625 --> 00:42:22,104 Oh, no, no, no, I love it. 917 00:42:22,148 --> 00:42:24,890 I-- I wanna know about your family traditions 918 00:42:24,933 --> 00:42:26,456 because it'’s part of you. 919 00:42:26,500 --> 00:42:28,720 [chuckling] I don'’t know. 920 00:42:45,084 --> 00:42:46,912 How great is she, huh? 921 00:42:48,566 --> 00:42:50,089 So great. 922 00:42:52,221 --> 00:42:54,484 We should get ready for the party. 923 00:43:03,450 --> 00:43:05,234 Your mom was pretty. 924 00:43:07,497 --> 00:43:08,673 She was. 925 00:43:09,587 --> 00:43:11,153 She was also a lot more than that. 926 00:43:11,197 --> 00:43:13,329 I know. 927 00:43:15,157 --> 00:43:17,638 Sorry, but you didn'’t really know my mom. 928 00:43:20,206 --> 00:43:23,992 You know, the year before my parents got divorced, 929 00:43:24,036 --> 00:43:26,038 it would get pretty ugly in our house. 930 00:43:27,474 --> 00:43:30,129 So sometimes I would just leave and... 931 00:43:30,172 --> 00:43:34,263 walk anywhere for as long as I could. 932 00:43:36,135 --> 00:43:38,006 And then one day, your mom drove by, 933 00:43:38,050 --> 00:43:39,617 and she picked me up. 934 00:43:40,705 --> 00:43:43,142 We went and had coffee, and we talked. 935 00:43:44,360 --> 00:43:46,145 And we probably did that 936 00:43:46,188 --> 00:43:47,929 five or six times. 937 00:43:49,931 --> 00:43:51,324 She never said anything. 938 00:43:51,367 --> 00:43:53,718 She probably knew it would embarrass me. 939 00:43:53,761 --> 00:43:55,850 It was kind of our little secret. 940 00:43:57,417 --> 00:43:59,549 But she really saved me back then. 941 00:44:01,943 --> 00:44:04,119 That'’s the kind of person that she was. 942 00:44:08,123 --> 00:44:10,691 Oh, I'’ve been meaning to show you this. 943 00:44:10,735 --> 00:44:12,998 I found it in my old room. 944 00:44:13,041 --> 00:44:14,782 Look at that. [chuckling] 945 00:44:14,826 --> 00:44:17,742 Were we actually friends for a minute back then? 946 00:44:17,785 --> 00:44:19,439 Yeah, I think so. 947 00:44:28,535 --> 00:44:30,493 So... 948 00:44:30,537 --> 00:44:32,713 uh, the party tonight, 949 00:44:32,757 --> 00:44:35,847 it'’s gonna be an interesting mix of people. 950 00:44:35,890 --> 00:44:37,370 What does that mean? 951 00:44:37,413 --> 00:44:38,937 My friends and coworkers, 952 00:44:38,980 --> 00:44:40,808 Dad'’s friends and coworkers 953 00:44:40,852 --> 00:44:42,549 and some of your old buddies 954 00:44:42,592 --> 00:44:44,899 that Dad probably hasn'’t met yet. 955 00:44:46,422 --> 00:44:48,729 Blaze, Stretch, No-Neck, 956 00:44:48,773 --> 00:44:51,340 the old gang from detention. 957 00:44:51,384 --> 00:44:53,342 [laughing] 958 00:44:55,083 --> 00:44:56,476 Well played. 959 00:45:05,659 --> 00:45:08,227 [hip-hop song playing] 960 00:45:14,102 --> 00:45:16,583 Why does it feel like an eighth grade dance in here? 961 00:45:16,626 --> 00:45:18,280 Oh, that'’s because our friends 962 00:45:18,324 --> 00:45:20,369 and Brandy'’s friends have nothing in common, 963 00:45:20,413 --> 00:45:22,850 which hopefully Dad is finding that out right now. 964 00:45:22,894 --> 00:45:24,809 [Charlyne] Which one'’s No-Neck? 965 00:45:24,852 --> 00:45:26,245 [Emma] The one with no neck. 966 00:45:27,594 --> 00:45:29,291 We are definitely 967 00:45:29,335 --> 00:45:30,945 the coolest ones here. 968 00:45:30,989 --> 00:45:32,904 For sure.Mmm. 969 00:45:32,947 --> 00:45:34,732 Why does it feel like a morgue in here? 970 00:45:34,775 --> 00:45:35,863 Oh, it'’s by design. 971 00:45:37,778 --> 00:45:39,519 Josh, this is Charlyne. 972 00:45:39,562 --> 00:45:40,955 Yeah, that tracks. 973 00:45:41,956 --> 00:45:43,523 And this is Beatrice. 974 00:45:43,566 --> 00:45:46,569 -Hey there, honey. -How'’s it going, Beatrice? 975 00:45:46,613 --> 00:45:48,310 Dude, she got game. 976 00:45:48,354 --> 00:45:50,878 -[laughing] -Yeah, she does. 977 00:45:52,662 --> 00:45:56,144 -Hey. -So, what did you think of Brandy'’s old gang? 978 00:45:57,363 --> 00:45:59,452 -Interesting folks. -They are. 979 00:45:59,495 --> 00:46:01,367 But I was just saying, we need to do something 980 00:46:01,410 --> 00:46:03,325 to liven up this party. 981 00:46:04,109 --> 00:46:06,459 I know one sure thing 982 00:46:06,502 --> 00:46:08,504 that works every time. 983 00:46:08,548 --> 00:46:11,769 Oh, yeah. Beer-lympics. 984 00:46:11,812 --> 00:46:15,207 -Beer-lympics! -[cheering] 985 00:46:16,686 --> 00:46:18,688 -Get the shots. -It'’s tradition. 986 00:46:19,472 --> 00:46:20,778 Salud. 987 00:46:25,130 --> 00:46:27,262 Put it on your head.This isn'’t really my kind of night. 988 00:46:27,306 --> 00:46:29,830 -Put it on your head. -This is great. 989 00:46:30,700 --> 00:46:32,615 [Josh] All right, who'’s next? 990 00:46:33,834 --> 00:46:35,749 -[bell dinging] -[cheering] 991 00:46:37,316 --> 00:46:38,839 [people] Go! Go! Go! 992 00:46:38,883 --> 00:46:43,017 Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! 993 00:46:44,497 --> 00:46:46,107 [cheering] 994 00:46:46,151 --> 00:46:48,849 Does he really have to take his shirt off to do that? 995 00:46:48,893 --> 00:46:51,025 [cheering] 996 00:46:51,069 --> 00:46:53,245 [Emma] Does she even own pants? 997 00:46:56,857 --> 00:46:58,772 Hold my beer. 998 00:46:58,816 --> 00:47:00,339 Dad-- Dad? 999 00:47:01,209 --> 00:47:03,777 [voices drowned out by cheers] 1000 00:47:03,821 --> 00:47:06,214 -[cheering] -Shit. 1001 00:47:09,914 --> 00:47:12,133 -[bell ringing] -[cheering] 1002 00:47:15,528 --> 00:47:17,225 [crowd murmurs] 1003 00:47:17,269 --> 00:47:19,184 -[Josh] Okay. -[cheering] 1004 00:47:19,227 --> 00:47:20,794 Here we go! 1005 00:47:22,274 --> 00:47:25,190 Dad? Dad, you don'’t need to take that-- Oh! 1006 00:47:25,233 --> 00:47:27,409 [cheering] 1007 00:47:27,453 --> 00:47:28,976 Yeah! 1008 00:47:31,500 --> 00:47:33,067 [cheering] 1009 00:47:33,111 --> 00:47:35,243 [rock music continues] 1010 00:47:38,986 --> 00:47:41,336 -What'’s going on? -Arm wrestling. 1011 00:47:41,380 --> 00:47:43,338 -I'’m taking bets. -Whah! 1012 00:47:43,382 --> 00:47:44,818 -You too, Bea? -Yeah! 1013 00:47:44,862 --> 00:47:47,386 -[cheering] -[bell ringing] 1014 00:47:47,429 --> 00:47:49,431 I am taking bets! 1015 00:47:49,475 --> 00:47:51,564 Taking bets! Give me that money. 1016 00:47:51,607 --> 00:47:54,436 Okay, thank you. All right. 1017 00:47:56,612 --> 00:47:58,919 [cheering] 1018 00:47:58,963 --> 00:48:03,097 Oh, shit! Sucks for all of you. 1019 00:48:03,141 --> 00:48:07,188 -[cheering] -Four over here, thank you! 1020 00:48:07,232 --> 00:48:09,451 [cheering] 1021 00:48:10,800 --> 00:48:13,586 Money? Yes. Yes! 1022 00:48:13,629 --> 00:48:15,893 -Good luck. -Thanks. 1023 00:48:15,936 --> 00:48:17,242 Whoa, whoa, whoa, Dad, 1024 00:48:17,285 --> 00:48:19,374 you don'’t need to-- Please don'’t. 1025 00:48:19,418 --> 00:48:21,724 -No, no, no, I got this. -[man] Come on. 1026 00:48:21,768 --> 00:48:25,598 -[hard rock playing] -Okay, okay. 1027 00:48:25,641 --> 00:48:28,949 Go easy on him, he'’s got a bad back. You got this, baby. 1028 00:48:28,993 --> 00:48:30,603 [Brandy] Come on, Jack! 1029 00:48:30,646 --> 00:48:32,300 Jack, Jack, Jack, Jack... 1030 00:48:32,344 --> 00:48:35,477 [continues chanting] 1031 00:48:35,521 --> 00:48:38,089 [cheering] 1032 00:48:38,132 --> 00:48:40,613 Aah! 1033 00:48:40,656 --> 00:48:42,006 Gotcha! 1034 00:48:42,049 --> 00:48:43,572 [cheering continues] 1035 00:48:43,616 --> 00:48:45,313 Baby! Yeah! 1036 00:48:45,357 --> 00:48:47,533 Told you you had a hot dad, whoo! 1037 00:48:51,015 --> 00:48:54,148 -[cheering] -[bell ringing] 1038 00:49:00,415 --> 00:49:03,114 -Dad, no. -You ready, Gramps? 1039 00:49:03,157 --> 00:49:06,073 Dad, should you really be doing a keg roll with your back? 1040 00:49:06,117 --> 00:49:08,075 Maybe you should sit this one out. 1041 00:49:08,119 --> 00:49:09,337 No way. 1042 00:49:09,381 --> 00:49:10,860 We each have a medal. 1043 00:49:10,904 --> 00:49:13,602 Tiebreaker. 1044 00:49:13,646 --> 00:49:16,431 Do you really feel good about beating a man 25 years older than you 1045 00:49:16,475 --> 00:49:19,739 in a physical challenge? Just be the bigger person. 1046 00:49:19,782 --> 00:49:21,262 You'’re telling me to be the bigger person? 1047 00:49:21,306 --> 00:49:24,048 You'’re not competing against him for anything. 1048 00:49:24,091 --> 00:49:26,050 Unless... you are... 1049 00:49:26,093 --> 00:49:28,356 fighting with him for Brandy or something. 1050 00:49:28,400 --> 00:49:32,099 Of course not. But what if I was? 1051 00:49:32,143 --> 00:49:34,014 That'’d only be helping you, right? 1052 00:49:35,537 --> 00:49:36,669 [whistling] 1053 00:49:36,712 --> 00:49:40,107 [overlapping voices] 1054 00:49:40,151 --> 00:49:42,022 [grunting, groaning] 1055 00:49:42,066 --> 00:49:44,198 Oh, Dad! Oh! 1056 00:49:44,242 --> 00:49:46,157 -Oh, my God! -Dad, are you okay? 1057 00:49:46,200 --> 00:49:48,159 Oh, I'’ve got him, I've got him. He has to lay flat. 1058 00:49:48,202 --> 00:49:50,552 [overlapping hollers] 1059 00:49:50,596 --> 00:49:53,077 Ah, yeah, I'’m fine. 1060 00:49:53,120 --> 00:49:54,687 I'’m fine, I'm fine. 1061 00:49:54,730 --> 00:49:57,342 Ugh, fine. I just... oh! 1062 00:49:57,385 --> 00:49:59,170 -Sorry, dude. -I just need to pop it back. 1063 00:49:59,213 --> 00:50:01,259 No, I got you. Turn around. 1064 00:50:01,302 --> 00:50:03,478 I-- This doesn'’t seem like a good idea. 1065 00:50:03,522 --> 00:50:05,437 It'’s deep in there? All right. Here we go. 1066 00:50:05,480 --> 00:50:06,786 -Yeah, okay, yeah. -Ready? 1067 00:50:06,829 --> 00:50:08,309 -[all groaning] -Oh, my God! 1068 00:50:08,353 --> 00:50:09,963 -One more, maybe faster. -One more, one more. 1069 00:50:10,007 --> 00:50:11,356 -One more. -Yeah. A little faster. 1070 00:50:11,399 --> 00:50:12,792 -Oh, God! -That'’s not getting it. 1071 00:50:12,835 --> 00:50:14,315 -Get him. -Maybe do me from behind. 1072 00:50:14,359 --> 00:50:15,664 -Behind? All right. -Yeah. 1073 00:50:15,708 --> 00:50:17,188 -It'’s deep in there. -Yeah, yeah, no. 1074 00:50:17,231 --> 00:50:19,712 -I can barely get it. -Okay, this is not-- 1075 00:50:19,755 --> 00:50:21,931 -Oh, God. -Oh, God. 1076 00:50:21,975 --> 00:50:24,108 Oh, wow! [laughing] 1077 00:50:24,151 --> 00:50:25,848 Ah, I feel so satisfied. 1078 00:50:25,892 --> 00:50:27,502 This is for you, champ. 1079 00:50:28,460 --> 00:50:29,722 -[cheering] -Later. 1080 00:50:29,765 --> 00:50:31,767 -Later, man. -[cheering] 1081 00:50:31,811 --> 00:50:33,378 Baby, maybe we should get you home. 1082 00:50:33,421 --> 00:50:34,857 Yeah, maybe I'’ll call a car. 1083 00:50:34,901 --> 00:50:36,337 -Dad, I'’ll take you. -No, we'’re hosting 1084 00:50:36,381 --> 00:50:37,991 this party, we can'’t all leave. 1085 00:50:38,035 --> 00:50:39,862 You guys stay. I'’ll go home. 1086 00:50:39,906 --> 00:50:41,951 You stay and have fun. That'’s an order. 1087 00:50:44,824 --> 00:50:47,696 -I'’m so proud of you, babe. -[muttering] 1088 00:50:47,740 --> 00:50:49,089 [laughing] 1089 00:50:49,133 --> 00:50:50,612 That'’s a legend right there, everyone. 1090 00:50:50,656 --> 00:50:51,918 -[murmurs] -[sighing] 1091 00:50:51,961 --> 00:50:54,051 Okay. Who wants to do shots? 1092 00:50:54,094 --> 00:50:58,490 [cheering] 1093 00:50:58,533 --> 00:51:01,580 [hip-hop music playing] 1094 00:51:01,623 --> 00:51:03,364 [Emma] How am I ever supposed to trust her? 1095 00:51:03,408 --> 00:51:05,192 That she'’s not gonna hurt my dad? 1096 00:51:05,236 --> 00:51:07,716 You trust him. And he'’s a grown-ass man 1097 00:51:07,760 --> 00:51:09,718 who can make his own decisions. 1098 00:51:09,762 --> 00:51:11,111 I do trust him. 1099 00:51:11,155 --> 00:51:12,895 All right, then let it go. 1100 00:51:12,939 --> 00:51:15,724 Maybe worry about your own life some more. 1101 00:51:16,682 --> 00:51:17,900 Hey. 1102 00:51:20,381 --> 00:51:21,426 Hey. 1103 00:51:22,862 --> 00:51:25,691 Emma... hello? 1104 00:51:28,041 --> 00:51:30,087 Maybe part of your problem is you don'’t even realize 1105 00:51:30,130 --> 00:51:32,132 when a hot guy is trying to get your attention. 1106 00:51:38,182 --> 00:51:40,140 Look, I know we didn'’t really, um, 1107 00:51:40,184 --> 00:51:42,229 know each other back then, but... 1108 00:51:42,795 --> 00:51:43,926 I... 1109 00:51:46,015 --> 00:51:47,365 I used to have a crush on you 1110 00:51:47,408 --> 00:51:50,455 back when you and Brandy were together. 1111 00:51:50,498 --> 00:51:52,152 Rea-- No! 1112 00:51:52,196 --> 00:51:54,285 -Really? -Mmm-hmm. 1113 00:51:54,328 --> 00:51:56,722 Oh, I'’m sorry, I-- I literally had no idea. 1114 00:51:56,765 --> 00:51:59,855 It'’s fine. You know, I managed to survive without you. 1115 00:51:59,899 --> 00:52:02,075 -Yeah. -I lost my virginity to Peter Grumbauer. 1116 00:52:02,119 --> 00:52:05,557 -Sorry about that. -No, it was great actually. 1117 00:52:05,600 --> 00:52:08,821 Yeah, he read a lot of books about female anatomy. 1118 00:52:08,864 --> 00:52:11,389 There you go. You were probably better off. 1119 00:52:11,432 --> 00:52:13,434 My moves at the time were quite basic. 1120 00:52:13,478 --> 00:52:16,307 -You know, three pumps and done? -Gross. 1121 00:52:16,350 --> 00:52:19,223 I'’ve gotten better since then, though... at sex. 1122 00:52:19,266 --> 00:52:21,094 -But not talking. -[laughing] 1123 00:52:24,271 --> 00:52:27,100 You know, it'’s not that I didn'’t ever notice you. 1124 00:52:28,493 --> 00:52:31,409 I'’d see you reading or whatever, and... 1125 00:52:32,714 --> 00:52:36,196 Ugh, I don'’t know, this is gonna sound corny, 1126 00:52:36,240 --> 00:52:40,809 but... you had a certain beauty in your solitude. 1127 00:52:45,727 --> 00:52:47,207 Um... 1128 00:52:47,251 --> 00:52:50,428 you know, try not to look into this, but... 1129 00:52:50,471 --> 00:52:52,038 [chuckling] 1130 00:52:52,081 --> 00:52:55,955 ...do you maybe wanna get out of here? 1131 00:52:57,522 --> 00:52:59,263 Whoo! Yeah! 1132 00:52:59,306 --> 00:53:01,308 What is wrong with me? 1133 00:53:01,352 --> 00:53:03,963 No, no, no, I thought she was gonna knock over that tree. 1134 00:53:04,006 --> 00:53:05,617 With that bony ass? 1135 00:53:05,660 --> 00:53:07,836 She has nowhere the amount of force 1136 00:53:07,880 --> 00:53:09,751 or weight necessary to move that sort of mass. 1137 00:53:09,795 --> 00:53:11,536 Okay, no, that was bad timing. 1138 00:53:11,579 --> 00:53:13,581 No, that was bad timing, it was a half-second of distraction. 1139 00:53:13,625 --> 00:53:15,670 No, you know what? Guys don'’t ever mature. 1140 00:53:15,714 --> 00:53:17,759 Like, look at my dad. 1141 00:53:17,803 --> 00:53:19,805 Just, all men are ruled by their dicks. 1142 00:53:19,848 --> 00:53:21,850 They have one dick driving the boat, 1143 00:53:21,894 --> 00:53:24,331 and then they have all these thousands of little dicks in their head, 1144 00:53:24,375 --> 00:53:27,029 -just telling the big dick where to go, so... -Okay. 1145 00:53:27,073 --> 00:53:29,945 Can you not make this more than it has to be? 1146 00:53:29,989 --> 00:53:31,295 What can I do? 1147 00:53:41,174 --> 00:53:43,437 You can hit on Brandy. For real. 1148 00:53:44,351 --> 00:53:46,266 -No, I'’m serious. -Come on. 1149 00:53:46,310 --> 00:53:49,617 -Come on. -No, I'’m serious. 1150 00:53:49,661 --> 00:53:52,185 You'’re a lady-killer, right? Yeah. And you'’re great at sex. 1151 00:53:52,229 --> 00:53:55,841 And you two still have some sort of chemistry going on, and... 1152 00:53:55,884 --> 00:53:57,538 it'’ll be one last test. 1153 00:53:58,626 --> 00:53:59,975 Because if she hooks up with you, 1154 00:54:00,019 --> 00:54:02,935 then she shows her true colors, and I win. 1155 00:54:02,978 --> 00:54:07,287 But if she turns you down, then I get to see you rejected, and I still win, so... 1156 00:54:07,331 --> 00:54:08,723 it'’s a win-win for me. 1157 00:54:11,073 --> 00:54:12,901 And you'’d rather see me do that 1158 00:54:12,945 --> 00:54:15,426 than continue whatever is going on here? 1159 00:54:18,690 --> 00:54:19,865 Yeah. 1160 00:54:19,908 --> 00:54:21,954 -I really need to know. -Really? 1161 00:54:27,176 --> 00:54:28,961 Fine. 1162 00:54:29,962 --> 00:54:32,225 Ah... by the way, 1163 00:54:32,269 --> 00:54:33,835 nobody turns this down. 1164 00:54:33,879 --> 00:54:35,489 You'’re the worst. 1165 00:54:35,533 --> 00:54:36,969 Hey! 1166 00:54:37,012 --> 00:54:38,318 Oh! 1167 00:54:38,971 --> 00:54:40,102 [laughing] 1168 00:54:40,146 --> 00:54:42,148 [dance music playing] 1169 00:55:06,215 --> 00:55:08,392 Cover your dongs, gentlemen. 1170 00:55:11,482 --> 00:55:12,961 -[hollers] -Open the door. 1171 00:55:13,005 --> 00:55:14,485 [Brandy] What the... 1172 00:55:16,225 --> 00:55:17,836 What the hell are you doing? 1173 00:55:17,879 --> 00:55:21,013 What are you doing in a bathroom stall with Josh? 1174 00:55:21,056 --> 00:55:22,841 We'’re having a smoke. Why? 1175 00:55:22,884 --> 00:55:25,147 What did you think we were doing? 1176 00:55:29,935 --> 00:55:32,633 Wait a second, you thought we were hooking up in there? 1177 00:55:34,461 --> 00:55:36,985 I can'’t believe that you would think so low of me 1178 00:55:37,029 --> 00:55:39,727 that you think I would cheat on your dad. 1179 00:55:39,771 --> 00:55:43,296 I would never cheat on your dad because I care about him, and I respect him. 1180 00:55:43,340 --> 00:55:45,385 I would never jeopardize what we have 1181 00:55:45,429 --> 00:55:48,693 by banging the guy who didn'’t get the Jeep commercial. 1182 00:55:48,736 --> 00:55:51,826 -Hey. -Yeah, he'’s way hotter than a guy in a Jeep ad. 1183 00:55:52,610 --> 00:55:54,176 Yeah, thank you. 1184 00:55:56,048 --> 00:55:57,136 What? 1185 00:55:58,485 --> 00:56:00,487 Wait, 1186 00:56:00,531 --> 00:56:03,316 is he the reason for all of this? 1187 00:56:04,665 --> 00:56:06,624 God, you don'’t even remember, do you? 1188 00:56:06,667 --> 00:56:08,190 What? 1189 00:56:08,234 --> 00:56:10,845 I told you that I had a crush on him. 1190 00:56:12,064 --> 00:56:15,415 I opened my fragile teenage heart to you, 1191 00:56:15,459 --> 00:56:17,939 and instead of being a good friend, 1192 00:56:17,983 --> 00:56:20,464 you yanked his crank right in front of me. 1193 00:56:20,507 --> 00:56:22,030 I didn'’t think it was a big deal. 1194 00:56:22,074 --> 00:56:23,902 I mean, you never said anything. 1195 00:56:23,945 --> 00:56:25,686 I was hurt. 1196 00:56:26,557 --> 00:56:27,862 Because you made me think that 1197 00:56:27,906 --> 00:56:29,647 I wasn'’t good enough for him. 1198 00:56:30,909 --> 00:56:32,563 Did you even notice that you and I 1199 00:56:32,606 --> 00:56:34,434 stopped hanging out completely after that? 1200 00:56:34,478 --> 00:56:35,957 It'’s just, I thought you were busy 1201 00:56:36,001 --> 00:56:37,394 with college applications 1202 00:56:37,437 --> 00:56:40,527 -and Peter Grumbauer. -[door opening] 1203 00:56:40,571 --> 00:56:42,224 Whoa. 1204 00:56:43,269 --> 00:56:45,445 Was I an insensitive bitch to you? 1205 00:56:45,489 --> 00:56:47,099 Those are a few words for it. 1206 00:56:47,142 --> 00:56:49,144 Just a selfish, teen monster. 1207 00:56:50,189 --> 00:56:52,017 I'’ll allow it. 1208 00:56:52,060 --> 00:56:54,715 Emma, I'’m sorry. Truly. 1209 00:56:57,588 --> 00:56:59,024 Thank you. 1210 00:56:59,067 --> 00:57:01,809 Emma, I really hope that you can forgive me. 1211 00:57:05,857 --> 00:57:09,426 It was a long time ago, so, maybe I can try. 1212 00:57:09,469 --> 00:57:12,037 Okay, because really, like, there'’s no reason 1213 00:57:12,080 --> 00:57:16,476 for us to be fighting over this Riverdaleextra. 1214 00:57:16,520 --> 00:57:19,000 Justin Timberlake backup dancer. 1215 00:57:19,044 --> 00:57:20,741 You'’re starting to hurt my feelings. 1216 00:57:20,785 --> 00:57:23,309 We are two strong, independent women. 1217 00:57:23,352 --> 00:57:24,832 We are-- are too smart 1218 00:57:24,876 --> 00:57:27,182 to let some guy come between us. 1219 00:57:27,226 --> 00:57:28,880 Yes, absolutely! 1220 00:57:28,923 --> 00:57:31,360 -Totally agree. -Great. 1221 00:57:31,404 --> 00:57:33,145 So you'’ll stop seeing my dad? 1222 00:57:35,626 --> 00:57:38,237 I'’m sorry, what did you just say to me? 1223 00:57:38,280 --> 00:57:42,197 So you'’ll stop... seeing my dad. 1224 00:57:43,764 --> 00:57:46,245 -Did you hear this chick? -[Josh] Mmm. 1225 00:57:46,288 --> 00:57:47,899 [laughing] Wow! 1226 00:57:47,942 --> 00:57:51,903 Cool, so you-- Nothing has changed, huh? 1227 00:57:51,946 --> 00:57:55,080 Yeah, you are still the same judgy, petty, 1228 00:57:55,123 --> 00:57:59,606 passive-aggressive A-hole you were ten minutes ago. 1229 00:57:59,650 --> 00:58:02,348 The same girl who spent the entire week slut-shaming me 1230 00:58:02,391 --> 00:58:04,437 and calling me stupid. 1231 00:58:04,481 --> 00:58:07,484 Do you know what'’s stupid? Being mean-spirited 1232 00:58:07,527 --> 00:58:10,487 and trying to shut people out who just want you to like them. 1233 00:58:10,530 --> 00:58:12,619 And do you know what happens to people like you? 1234 00:58:12,663 --> 00:58:14,621 They end up alone. 1235 00:58:14,665 --> 00:58:17,494 God, I have done nothing but try to be kind to you, 1236 00:58:17,537 --> 00:58:19,365 and I'’ve taken a ton of shit from you, 1237 00:58:19,408 --> 00:58:21,280 so guess what? 1238 00:58:21,323 --> 00:58:22,629 I am done! 1239 00:58:22,673 --> 00:58:24,892 I am done trying to win you over. 1240 00:58:24,936 --> 00:58:27,634 In fact, no, I am done with you, period. 1241 00:58:27,678 --> 00:58:31,725 Okay, well, I may have taken things too far... 1242 00:58:31,769 --> 00:58:34,815 You know, I was never competing with you for your dad'’s attention, 1243 00:58:34,859 --> 00:58:38,036 but if you are psycho enough to think that I'’m trying to steal him away from you, 1244 00:58:38,079 --> 00:58:40,255 then fine! Huh? 1245 00:58:40,299 --> 00:58:41,779 Maybe I'’ll do that! 1246 00:58:41,822 --> 00:58:43,868 Yeah! You know, we talked about him retiring early 1247 00:58:43,911 --> 00:58:45,826 -and moving to Los Angeles. -What? 1248 00:58:45,870 --> 00:58:48,960 Mmm, the West Coast sounds pretty fantastic right about now. 1249 00:58:51,353 --> 00:58:54,052 If you wanna go to war with me... 1250 00:58:54,095 --> 00:58:57,011 -I will win. -Okay, let'’s not get crazy-- 1251 00:58:57,055 --> 00:59:00,101 Oh, you haven'’t seen crazy yet, missy! 1252 00:59:00,145 --> 00:59:02,016 I once beat Megan Thee Stallion 1253 00:59:02,060 --> 00:59:04,366 in a titty twister contest! 1254 00:59:06,238 --> 00:59:08,109 Guard your titties, bitch! 1255 00:59:11,330 --> 00:59:13,550 Didn'’t think that one through. 1256 00:59:18,119 --> 00:59:20,121 -[line ringing] -Pick up the phone. 1257 00:59:20,165 --> 00:59:21,645 [line ringing] 1258 00:59:21,688 --> 00:59:25,039 [Charlyne] So, what is happening exactly? 1259 00:59:25,083 --> 00:59:27,476 Well, I woke the sleeping giant, 1260 00:59:27,520 --> 00:59:30,784 and the Sasquatch is coming to destroy my life. 1261 00:59:30,828 --> 00:59:32,090 Brandy? 1262 00:59:32,133 --> 00:59:33,657 [Charlyne] Where is she? 1263 00:59:35,136 --> 00:59:37,269 Lurking, biding her time 1264 00:59:37,312 --> 00:59:38,966 for the perfect moment 1265 00:59:39,010 --> 00:59:42,187 to twist my titties. 1266 00:59:42,230 --> 00:59:43,667 Okay, is Josh there? 1267 00:59:44,972 --> 00:59:46,626 Mmm, yeah. 1268 00:59:46,670 --> 00:59:47,932 Put him on. 1269 00:59:49,020 --> 00:59:50,412 Hey. 1270 00:59:51,805 --> 00:59:53,241 Hey! 1271 00:59:54,765 --> 00:59:56,331 It'’s for you. 1272 00:59:59,596 --> 01:00:01,206 Trade.Oh. 1273 01:00:02,381 --> 01:00:03,991 She obviously can'’t drive home. 1274 01:00:04,035 --> 01:00:08,517 -Yeah. -Can you take care of her? 1275 01:00:08,561 --> 01:00:11,956 Help her sober up before you put her in a car so she doesn'’t go home drunk? 1276 01:00:11,999 --> 01:00:14,567 Uh, yeah. 1277 01:00:14,611 --> 01:00:16,221 I mean, she can crash on my couch. 1278 01:00:16,264 --> 01:00:18,397 -I live above the bar. -Okay. 1279 01:00:18,440 --> 01:00:20,181 But I'’m trusting you with my friend, 1280 01:00:20,225 --> 01:00:23,141 so if you take advantage of her in any way, 1281 01:00:23,184 --> 01:00:26,579 I will make balloon animals out of your wiener. 1282 01:00:26,623 --> 01:00:28,712 Did you two go to the same finishing school? 1283 01:00:28,755 --> 01:00:30,017 Shut up. 1284 01:00:31,715 --> 01:00:33,107 She'’s great. 1285 01:00:34,152 --> 01:00:36,545 I'’ll take that.That'’s not fair. 1286 01:00:36,589 --> 01:00:37,938 "Donkey." 1287 01:00:40,462 --> 01:00:41,812 [gurgling] Oh. 1288 01:00:44,728 --> 01:00:46,381 -[laughing] -Oh... 1289 01:00:47,731 --> 01:00:50,298 God, this is your fault. 1290 01:00:50,342 --> 01:00:52,039 How is this my fault? 1291 01:00:53,388 --> 01:00:56,217 Oh, it'’ll come to me. Just give me a minute. 1292 01:00:56,261 --> 01:00:58,089 Ah, well, you can sleep on the couch. 1293 01:00:58,132 --> 01:01:00,613 -[shoes thudding] -Nice. 1294 01:01:00,657 --> 01:01:03,355 I like to keep my place tidy. 1295 01:01:03,877 --> 01:01:05,618 Lame. 1296 01:01:05,662 --> 01:01:07,576 [chuckling] Terrible striptease. 1297 01:01:07,620 --> 01:01:09,187 Just awful. 1298 01:01:12,538 --> 01:01:14,105 Okay. 1299 01:01:14,845 --> 01:01:16,585 -This? -Mmm-hmm. 1300 01:01:19,240 --> 01:01:22,766 [Josh] Yeah, I'’ll take the couch. 1301 01:02:16,254 --> 01:02:19,257 Josh? Hey. 1302 01:02:19,300 --> 01:02:21,215 [sighing] 1303 01:02:21,259 --> 01:02:23,174 Hey, you all right? 1304 01:02:40,800 --> 01:02:43,063 Wait, are you sober? 1305 01:02:43,107 --> 01:02:44,761 As a judge.Yeah? 1306 01:02:44,804 --> 01:02:46,545 Mmm-hmm. 1307 01:02:46,588 --> 01:02:48,329 ♪ Hands up♪ 1308 01:02:48,373 --> 01:02:50,201 ♪ Guard dropped♪ 1309 01:02:50,244 --> 01:02:52,116 ♪ Heart stopped♪ 1310 01:02:53,857 --> 01:02:55,684 ♪ Tiptoe♪ 1311 01:02:55,728 --> 01:02:57,904 ♪ So slow♪ 1312 01:02:57,948 --> 01:03:00,472 ♪ Trying to steal your heart♪ 1313 01:03:02,561 --> 01:03:05,346 Wait, this is consensual? 1314 01:03:05,390 --> 01:03:06,565 Very. 1315 01:03:08,654 --> 01:03:10,308 ♪ Hands up♪ 1316 01:03:10,351 --> 01:03:12,266 ♪ Guard dropped♪ 1317 01:03:12,310 --> 01:03:14,268 ♪ Don'’t stop♪ 1318 01:03:21,232 --> 01:03:23,582 Just triple-checking this is consent. 1319 01:03:23,625 --> 01:03:26,019 I'’m initiating, and you'’re consenting, right? 1320 01:03:26,063 --> 01:03:27,629 Yeah.Okay. 1321 01:03:33,766 --> 01:03:36,247 ♪ She said "Kiss me"♪ 1322 01:03:36,290 --> 01:03:38,075 ♪ Slowly♪ 1323 01:03:38,118 --> 01:03:40,729 ♪ I don'’t wanna go too fast♪ 1324 01:03:40,773 --> 01:03:41,905 [Emma sighing] 1325 01:03:41,948 --> 01:03:43,645 ♪ Stay here♪ 1326 01:03:43,689 --> 01:03:45,604 ♪ So near♪ 1327 01:03:45,647 --> 01:03:49,303 ♪ Make this last♪ 1328 01:03:49,347 --> 01:03:53,394 ♪ Love♪ 1329 01:03:53,438 --> 01:03:55,527 ♪ How am I♪ 1330 01:03:56,702 --> 01:03:58,530 ♪ Hands up♪ 1331 01:03:58,573 --> 01:04:00,271 ♪ Guard dropped♪ 1332 01:04:00,314 --> 01:04:02,708 ♪ Don'’t stop♪ 1333 01:04:24,556 --> 01:04:25,949 Hey. 1334 01:04:25,992 --> 01:04:27,472 What'’re you doing? 1335 01:04:27,515 --> 01:04:28,777 I'’m gonna head out. 1336 01:04:28,821 --> 01:04:31,824 Really? What time is it? 1337 01:04:32,607 --> 01:04:34,522 Early. 1338 01:04:34,566 --> 01:04:36,698 [chuckling] Why don'’t you just stay here? 1339 01:04:38,570 --> 01:04:41,703 No, I gotta go face Dad and Brandy. 1340 01:04:41,747 --> 01:04:43,357 She was really mad last night. 1341 01:04:43,401 --> 01:04:46,012 Yeah. It'’ll be all right. 1342 01:04:46,056 --> 01:04:47,535 Just be yourself. 1343 01:04:48,536 --> 01:04:49,929 Or... 1344 01:04:49,973 --> 01:04:52,192 actually be the opposite of that. 1345 01:04:55,108 --> 01:04:56,805 Wait, hold on. 1346 01:04:57,589 --> 01:04:59,069 You know, that was... 1347 01:05:00,418 --> 01:05:03,377 that was really something. 1348 01:05:04,117 --> 01:05:05,684 Was it? 1349 01:05:05,727 --> 01:05:07,033 Yeah. 1350 01:05:07,077 --> 01:05:08,687 It... wasn'’t it? 1351 01:05:11,516 --> 01:05:16,042 So, when you mentioned the camera and your photography... 1352 01:05:16,086 --> 01:05:18,392 why'’d you let me underestimate you like that? 1353 01:05:19,916 --> 01:05:21,395 [sighing] 1354 01:05:21,439 --> 01:05:25,399 Mmm, I don'’t know. Sometimes it'’s easier 1355 01:05:25,443 --> 01:05:28,794 to let people believe what they want about you. 1356 01:05:28,837 --> 01:05:31,710 You know, it takes work to really get to know someone. 1357 01:05:31,753 --> 01:05:34,191 Yeah, well, who wants more work? 1358 01:05:36,019 --> 01:05:37,368 Yeah. 1359 01:05:38,673 --> 01:05:40,806 Isn'’t that what life'’s about, though? 1360 01:05:41,633 --> 01:05:44,244 People? Connection? 1361 01:05:47,204 --> 01:05:49,119 I don'’t know, maybe. 1362 01:05:51,904 --> 01:05:54,341 All right, well, I think I have everything, 1363 01:05:54,385 --> 01:05:56,822 and I'’m not doing that thing where I leave something behind. 1364 01:05:57,649 --> 01:05:59,390 Eh, it doesn'’t really matter. 1365 01:05:59,433 --> 01:06:03,002 If you wanna see someone again, you can find a reason. 1366 01:06:05,309 --> 01:06:07,746 -All right, well... -What? 1367 01:06:08,834 --> 01:06:10,140 Hold on one sec. 1368 01:06:13,186 --> 01:06:14,579 [chuckling] 1369 01:06:14,622 --> 01:06:16,407 Am I missing something here? 1370 01:06:17,538 --> 01:06:21,412 No, I'’ll just... I'’ll see you around. 1371 01:06:24,067 --> 01:06:26,547 -I can walk you out. -No, I'’ve got it. 1372 01:06:30,073 --> 01:06:31,509 Okay. 1373 01:06:57,970 --> 01:06:59,363 Damn it. 1374 01:07:05,325 --> 01:07:07,719 [sleigh bells jingle] 1375 01:07:15,161 --> 01:07:16,684 [door closing] 1376 01:07:17,511 --> 01:07:19,035 Hey, Dad, are you here? 1377 01:07:31,786 --> 01:07:33,136 Is everything okay? 1378 01:07:34,441 --> 01:07:37,792 [Brandy] Yeah, yeah, whoo! 1379 01:07:37,836 --> 01:07:40,578 -Everything all right? -[Brandy] Love that! 1380 01:07:40,621 --> 01:07:41,883 -Aah! -No, no, no, no, no! 1381 01:07:41,927 --> 01:07:43,450 No! Erase! Erase! 1382 01:07:43,494 --> 01:07:45,670 Erase! Erase! 1383 01:07:45,713 --> 01:07:46,888 Monkey! 1384 01:07:46,932 --> 01:07:49,108 Um, I'’ll be there in a second. 1385 01:07:49,152 --> 01:07:52,329 -No! -♪ The itsy-bitsy-spider♪ 1386 01:07:52,372 --> 01:07:54,592 -Are you insane? -♪ Went up the water spout♪ 1387 01:07:54,635 --> 01:07:57,421 ♪ Down came the rain and...♪ 1388 01:07:58,813 --> 01:08:01,077 You made Addy watch? 1389 01:08:01,120 --> 01:08:02,774 We didn'’t know you were in the house. 1390 01:08:02,817 --> 01:08:04,993 I mean, you really should announce your presence. 1391 01:08:05,037 --> 01:08:07,257 Oh, I'’m sorry, I was expecting to come home 1392 01:08:07,300 --> 01:08:09,128 on Christmas Eve and go ice skating 1393 01:08:09,172 --> 01:08:11,217 with my father like we do every year. 1394 01:08:11,261 --> 01:08:13,176 But instead I find you and him going at it 1395 01:08:13,219 --> 01:08:14,916 like you'’re in the Home Depot stock room. 1396 01:08:14,960 --> 01:08:16,570 So excuse me, this is-- 1397 01:08:16,614 --> 01:08:18,224 This is human nature. 1398 01:08:18,268 --> 01:08:20,008 We are in an adult relationship, 1399 01:08:20,052 --> 01:08:22,837 and you should probably get used to it. 1400 01:08:22,881 --> 01:08:25,971 I need to have a private conversation with my father for a moment. 1401 01:08:26,014 --> 01:08:27,451 -Family talk. -Uh, no. 1402 01:08:27,494 --> 01:08:29,061 This is not family time, see? 1403 01:08:29,105 --> 01:08:30,454 This is sexy time. 1404 01:08:30,497 --> 01:08:32,325 And you are not a part of sexy time. 1405 01:08:32,369 --> 01:08:35,328 Actually, you are not a part of this relationship. 1406 01:08:35,372 --> 01:08:37,591 -You'’re not a part of this family. -Whoa! 1407 01:08:37,635 --> 01:08:40,899 That'’s enough, both of you. Stop it. 1408 01:08:40,942 --> 01:08:43,597 Look, none of us are happy with the current situation, 1409 01:08:43,641 --> 01:08:45,164 including me. 1410 01:08:45,208 --> 01:08:46,687 But this is our reality, 1411 01:08:46,731 --> 01:08:48,950 and we have to find a way to work through it. 1412 01:08:48,994 --> 01:08:52,040 Okay, but your daughter is the one who has to work through her issues, okay? 1413 01:08:52,084 --> 01:08:54,217 Starting with codependency. 1414 01:08:54,260 --> 01:08:57,307 Oh, you two think that you don'’t have any issues as a couple? 1415 01:08:57,350 --> 01:09:02,050 Really? I mean, sure, I guess the sex is good now, 1416 01:09:02,094 --> 01:09:04,096 but do you really think 1417 01:09:04,140 --> 01:09:06,054 that she'’s not going to get bored with you 1418 01:09:06,098 --> 01:09:07,839 and leave you for a younger guy? 1419 01:09:07,882 --> 01:09:09,232 I don'’t think that'’s any of your business. 1420 01:09:09,275 --> 01:09:11,016 Oh, maybe he'’ll leave you first. 1421 01:09:11,059 --> 01:09:15,499 Because you and my dad'’s Venn diagram has no overlap. 1422 01:09:15,542 --> 01:09:17,457 Have you even seen The Godfather? 1423 01:09:17,501 --> 01:09:18,676 Didn'’t think so. 1424 01:09:18,719 --> 01:09:20,286 And can you name one band 1425 01:09:20,330 --> 01:09:22,245 in the last five years? 1426 01:09:22,288 --> 01:09:24,116 I'’m not even gonna let you answer that. 1427 01:09:24,160 --> 01:09:26,510 Brandy doesn'’t like Moscato. 1428 01:09:26,553 --> 01:09:28,860 And Dad doesn'’t like those hipster shirts that you buy him. 1429 01:09:28,903 --> 01:09:30,427 You don'’t? 1430 01:09:30,470 --> 01:09:32,211 He'’s not selling organic Popsicles in Brooklyn. 1431 01:09:32,255 --> 01:09:34,561 All right, Emma, that'’s enough, all right? Stop it. 1432 01:09:34,605 --> 01:09:37,260 Dad, are you really moving to Los Angeles? 1433 01:09:38,435 --> 01:09:40,088 Our people don'’t belong in the sun. 1434 01:09:40,132 --> 01:09:42,830 We'’re just one big melanoma. 1435 01:09:42,874 --> 01:09:44,615 And, Brandy, have you thought about kids 1436 01:09:44,658 --> 01:09:46,965 -and whether or not you even want them? -Okay. 1437 01:09:47,008 --> 01:09:51,230 -Because my dad has already had his family. -Emma, not another word. 1438 01:09:51,274 --> 01:09:54,625 -But we'’re not done talking. -Yes, we are. 1439 01:09:54,668 --> 01:09:57,236 -Dad. -Go to your room. 1440 01:10:11,511 --> 01:10:14,601 [soft Christmas music] 1441 01:10:42,412 --> 01:10:45,676 [soft Christmas music] 1442 01:11:03,650 --> 01:11:05,261 [church bell ringing] 1443 01:11:24,758 --> 01:11:27,065 -I'’m concerned. -Why? 1444 01:11:27,108 --> 01:11:28,980 I don'’t think I should be here. 1445 01:11:29,023 --> 01:11:30,982 I didn'’t think you would come, so thank you. 1446 01:11:31,025 --> 01:11:32,592 Come on in.Great. 1447 01:11:36,204 --> 01:11:38,337 You look like a Hot Topic threw up on you. 1448 01:11:38,381 --> 01:11:39,686 I did buy this there. 1449 01:11:40,383 --> 01:11:42,341 Okay. Oh, God. 1450 01:11:42,385 --> 01:11:44,648 Hey, Charlyne. So nice you could join us. 1451 01:11:44,691 --> 01:11:46,911 -Yeah, I... -Your family probably misses you. 1452 01:11:46,954 --> 01:11:49,261 Oh, no, they probably haven'’t even noticed yet. 1453 01:11:49,305 --> 01:11:50,915 They are a mess. 1454 01:11:55,920 --> 01:11:57,835 Why don'’t we get started opening presents? 1455 01:11:57,878 --> 01:11:59,097 [overlapping chatter] 1456 01:11:59,140 --> 01:12:00,316 -Hi. -Let'’s see who goes first. 1457 01:12:00,359 --> 01:12:02,143 -Welcome. -[Jack] I will. 1458 01:12:02,187 --> 01:12:04,145 Uh... yeah. 1459 01:12:04,189 --> 01:12:06,278 Huh, I wonder who this is from. 1460 01:12:09,629 --> 01:12:11,109 Oh... 1461 01:12:12,458 --> 01:12:13,938 Wow. 1462 01:12:16,114 --> 01:12:17,463 Thanks, hon. 1463 01:12:18,464 --> 01:12:20,248 Yeah, sure. 1464 01:12:22,903 --> 01:12:25,341 Let'’s see. Your turn, Emma. 1465 01:12:26,646 --> 01:12:28,344 "From Emma." 1466 01:12:28,387 --> 01:12:30,346 Aw, I love you. 1467 01:12:32,348 --> 01:12:34,959 Merry Christmas, everyone. 1468 01:12:36,787 --> 01:12:38,179 Let'’s see. 1469 01:12:43,054 --> 01:12:44,098 What'’s this? 1470 01:12:45,230 --> 01:12:48,276 I put a down payment on the lake house. 1471 01:12:48,320 --> 01:12:49,756 You what? 1472 01:12:49,800 --> 01:12:52,411 With some savings and my inheritance from Mom. 1473 01:12:53,456 --> 01:12:54,979 Why'’d you do that? 1474 01:12:56,502 --> 01:12:59,592 Because it belongs in our family. 1475 01:12:59,636 --> 01:13:01,986 It'’s the place where we were the happiest. 1476 01:13:02,029 --> 01:13:04,162 This is... too much. 1477 01:13:04,205 --> 01:13:06,686 This is all... too much. 1478 01:13:06,730 --> 01:13:09,297 You can'’t-- You can'’t buy a house 1479 01:13:09,341 --> 01:13:11,735 just to recapture your childhood memories 1480 01:13:11,778 --> 01:13:15,260 or re-imagine us as some kind of idyllic family. 1481 01:13:15,303 --> 01:13:16,957 That is how I remember us. 1482 01:13:17,001 --> 01:13:18,872 Your mom and I did not have a perfect marriage. 1483 01:13:18,916 --> 01:13:21,440 We had our problems, like anyone else. 1484 01:13:21,484 --> 01:13:23,181 What kind of problems? 1485 01:13:30,971 --> 01:13:33,191 Why is she acting like she knows something I don'’t? 1486 01:13:33,234 --> 01:13:36,716 Because secrets are meant to be kept secrets. 1487 01:13:36,760 --> 01:13:40,067 Your mom had an affair when you were in high school. 1488 01:13:40,111 --> 01:13:41,417 Fuck me. 1489 01:13:43,070 --> 01:13:45,464 -With who? -It doesn'’t matter, 1490 01:13:45,508 --> 01:13:48,685 and it wasn'’t for very long, and we worked our way through it. 1491 01:13:48,728 --> 01:13:53,124 I believe we were truly happy again before she passed away. 1492 01:13:53,167 --> 01:13:55,039 And you never told me? 1493 01:13:55,082 --> 01:13:56,954 It wasn'’t something you had to deal with, 1494 01:13:56,997 --> 01:13:59,609 and I didn'’t want it to affect how you felt about your mom. 1495 01:13:59,652 --> 01:14:01,480 But you told Brandy. 1496 01:14:02,655 --> 01:14:04,265 No, I didn'’t. 1497 01:14:10,576 --> 01:14:12,752 My mom talked to you about it. 1498 01:14:12,796 --> 01:14:16,974 When you two had your secret talks. 1499 01:14:17,017 --> 01:14:20,499 -You'’re a better friend to my mom than I ever was. -Oh, Emma, that'’s not true. 1500 01:14:20,543 --> 01:14:22,893 You know both of my parents better than I ever did, 1501 01:14:22,936 --> 01:14:24,677 you'’re more part of this family than I am. 1502 01:14:24,721 --> 01:14:26,287 No. 1503 01:14:27,288 --> 01:14:29,813 I loved your mom so much. 1504 01:14:31,815 --> 01:14:34,774 But she'’s gone now. She'’s not coming back. 1505 01:14:34,818 --> 01:14:36,602 I'’m just trying to move forward. 1506 01:14:41,955 --> 01:14:43,914 You two don'’t make any sense. 1507 01:14:43,957 --> 01:14:45,742 Maybe you'’re right. 1508 01:14:45,785 --> 01:14:47,961 You made some good points last night. 1509 01:14:48,005 --> 01:14:50,790 There are a lot of reasons why we don'’t work on paper. 1510 01:14:50,834 --> 01:14:52,966 And she might leave me someday. 1511 01:14:54,185 --> 01:14:55,795 But that'’s a risk I'’m willing to take 1512 01:14:55,839 --> 01:14:58,406 so I can spend another minute with her, 1513 01:14:58,450 --> 01:14:59,973 because... 1514 01:15:02,019 --> 01:15:03,194 I love her. 1515 01:15:06,240 --> 01:15:08,678 [chuckling] I love you. 1516 01:15:10,418 --> 01:15:12,812 -Dad! -Emma, no! 1517 01:15:14,031 --> 01:15:17,513 You say what you need to say. Say it now. 1518 01:15:17,556 --> 01:15:19,732 This is the kind of future that you want? 1519 01:15:21,865 --> 01:15:24,171 I don'’t know if I can be a part of it. 1520 01:15:24,215 --> 01:15:26,391 So you'’re saying it'’s between you and her. 1521 01:15:26,434 --> 01:15:28,915 -That'’s not what she's saying. -That'’s exactly what I'm saying. 1522 01:15:28,959 --> 01:15:30,438 Zip it, traitor. 1523 01:15:31,831 --> 01:15:34,138 Can'’t you see that Brandy is, like, 1524 01:15:34,181 --> 01:15:36,140 a serial killer? 1525 01:15:36,183 --> 01:15:38,490 She'’s trying to destroy our family, 1526 01:15:38,534 --> 01:15:40,971 and it'’s working! She'’s winning! 1527 01:15:41,754 --> 01:15:43,669 It'’s a Christmas Day massacre! 1528 01:15:43,713 --> 01:15:44,844 [mouthing silently] 1529 01:15:44,888 --> 01:15:46,585 Emma... 1530 01:15:47,978 --> 01:15:49,762 what are you talking about? 1531 01:15:50,546 --> 01:15:51,590 No, no, she'’s right. 1532 01:15:52,809 --> 01:15:55,202 I can'’t do this. 1533 01:15:55,246 --> 01:15:57,074 I can'’t come between you and Emma. 1534 01:15:59,076 --> 01:16:03,689 I saw my family break apart, and it was devastating. 1535 01:16:03,733 --> 01:16:06,213 Both my parents started new families, and I-- 1536 01:16:06,257 --> 01:16:07,954 I fell through the cracks. 1537 01:16:07,998 --> 01:16:10,827 So I have felt that distance. 1538 01:16:11,654 --> 01:16:13,177 That absence. 1539 01:16:14,221 --> 01:16:16,223 And I wouldn'’t wish it on anyone. 1540 01:16:18,138 --> 01:16:19,313 Not even you. 1541 01:16:21,098 --> 01:16:23,274 Hold on. Hold on. 1542 01:16:23,317 --> 01:16:25,972 That situation isn'’t anything like this. 1543 01:16:27,060 --> 01:16:28,845 This is you and me. 1544 01:16:30,324 --> 01:16:31,543 Wait. 1545 01:16:33,371 --> 01:16:34,894 Please, stay. 1546 01:16:35,852 --> 01:16:38,724 I can'’t. I have to go. 1547 01:16:43,642 --> 01:16:45,078 -[door slams] -Dad... 1548 01:16:45,122 --> 01:16:47,385 J-- Just don'’t. 1549 01:16:49,039 --> 01:16:52,346 -You know what I mean, right? -No, I don'’t, you freak! 1550 01:16:52,390 --> 01:16:55,175 Brandy is not destroying your family. 1551 01:16:55,219 --> 01:16:56,873 That'’s what you're doing. 1552 01:17:02,139 --> 01:17:04,489 [soft music] 1553 01:17:12,323 --> 01:17:14,281 ♪ It'’s Christmas And I'’m hoping♪ 1554 01:17:14,325 --> 01:17:17,110 ♪ That you'’ll see me...♪ 1555 01:17:17,154 --> 01:17:19,504 ♪ By New Year'’s Eve We might just♪ 1556 01:17:19,547 --> 01:17:21,332 ♪ Be a thing♪ 1557 01:17:22,333 --> 01:17:24,335 ♪ Come Valentine'’s Day♪ 1558 01:17:24,378 --> 01:17:26,990 ♪ I might have The strength to say♪ 1559 01:17:27,033 --> 01:17:32,212 ♪ I'’ve loved you From the very beginning♪ 1560 01:17:32,256 --> 01:17:34,345 ♪ All this magic on the ground♪ 1561 01:17:34,388 --> 01:17:36,608 ♪ Has got me wishin'’♪ 1562 01:17:37,740 --> 01:17:39,524 ♪ That we won'’t melt away♪ 1563 01:17:39,567 --> 01:17:42,701 ♪ Before we start♪ 1564 01:17:42,745 --> 01:17:44,572 ♪ There is just one thing♪ 1565 01:17:44,616 --> 01:17:47,401 ♪ That this holiday'’s Been missin'’♪ 1566 01:17:47,445 --> 01:17:49,534 ♪ And that'’s you Beneath these lights♪ 1567 01:17:49,577 --> 01:17:52,493 ♪ Holdin'’ my heart♪ 1568 01:17:52,537 --> 01:17:54,539 ♪ If there was ever the time♪ 1569 01:17:54,582 --> 01:17:56,759 ♪ That I could tell you♪ 1570 01:17:56,802 --> 01:17:57,977 Okay, so if you... 1571 01:17:58,021 --> 01:17:59,544 ♪ Just what I think♪ 1572 01:17:59,587 --> 01:18:01,894 ♪ About you, babe♪ 1573 01:18:01,938 --> 01:18:03,330 [phone ringing] 1574 01:18:03,374 --> 01:18:05,245 ♪ I guess it'’s in this moment♪ 1575 01:18:05,289 --> 01:18:07,465 ♪ With me and the snow fallin'’♪ 1576 01:18:07,508 --> 01:18:09,075 ♪ And I'’m praying that♪ 1577 01:18:09,119 --> 01:18:10,424 Sorry... 1578 01:18:10,468 --> 01:18:12,383 ♪ You'’ll feel the same way♪ 1579 01:18:22,480 --> 01:18:24,221 ♪ I'’ve gotten really good♪ 1580 01:18:24,264 --> 01:18:27,964 ♪ At wrapping up my feelings♪ 1581 01:18:28,007 --> 01:18:29,792 ♪ In the pretty little bow♪ 1582 01:18:29,835 --> 01:18:31,750 ♪ Under the tree...♪ 1583 01:18:33,752 --> 01:18:34,797 Hey, Charlyne. 1584 01:18:35,798 --> 01:18:37,713 Oh, hi, guys. 1585 01:18:43,022 --> 01:18:45,024 ♪ If there was ever a time♪ 1586 01:18:45,068 --> 01:18:47,157 ♪ That I could tell you♪ 1587 01:18:48,549 --> 01:18:53,076 ♪ Just what I think About you, babe♪ 1588 01:18:53,119 --> 01:18:55,513 ♪ I guess It'’s in this moment♪ 1589 01:18:55,556 --> 01:18:58,516 ♪ With me And the snow fallin'’...♪ 1590 01:18:58,559 --> 01:19:00,953 Come on, you'’re really never gonna talk to me again? 1591 01:19:00,997 --> 01:19:02,520 Haven'’t decided yet. 1592 01:19:03,303 --> 01:19:04,609 Seriously? 1593 01:19:10,746 --> 01:19:15,359 I'’m sorry for subjecting you to the Christmas Day Massacre 1594 01:19:15,402 --> 01:19:19,493 and for not listening to you when you were clearly the voice of reason. 1595 01:19:19,537 --> 01:19:21,321 Go on. 1596 01:19:21,365 --> 01:19:23,933 You were right. About everything. 1597 01:19:25,238 --> 01:19:26,849 Leave us. 1598 01:19:32,419 --> 01:19:33,594 I'’m the killer. 1599 01:19:34,813 --> 01:19:37,642 I tried to kill Dad and Brandy'’s relationship. 1600 01:19:37,685 --> 01:19:39,513 Then Brandy sacrificed her own happiness 1601 01:19:39,557 --> 01:19:42,473 just to protect my relationship with my dad. 1602 01:19:42,516 --> 01:19:45,128 So, I guess if I was setting up a test 1603 01:19:45,171 --> 01:19:47,391 to see if she was a good person, 1604 01:19:47,434 --> 01:19:49,219 she passed. 1605 01:19:50,437 --> 01:19:52,570 She makes my dad happy. 1606 01:19:52,613 --> 01:19:54,180 That'’s all I want for him. 1607 01:19:55,399 --> 01:19:57,836 Hallelujah, there is hope for you yet. 1608 01:20:00,012 --> 01:20:02,014 And now I know exactly what I need to do. 1609 01:20:02,058 --> 01:20:04,408 Uh-oh, when you sound so certain, 1610 01:20:04,451 --> 01:20:06,236 it'’s certain to be a disaster. 1611 01:20:06,279 --> 01:20:08,107 I'’m going to get them back together. 1612 01:20:08,978 --> 01:20:11,110 For Christ'’s sakes, you... 1613 01:20:11,154 --> 01:20:12,677 still aren'’t getting it. 1614 01:20:12,720 --> 01:20:15,506 If your dad and Brandy wanna be together, 1615 01:20:15,549 --> 01:20:16,899 it'’s up to them, not you. 1616 01:20:16,942 --> 01:20:18,857 You can'’t go around manipulating people 1617 01:20:18,901 --> 01:20:21,729 like a little blazer-wearing puppet master. 1618 01:20:24,994 --> 01:20:27,126 I need to butt out and leave them alone. 1619 01:20:27,170 --> 01:20:28,345 Yes. 1620 01:20:30,216 --> 01:20:33,045 Geez, how did I even get to this place? 1621 01:20:33,089 --> 01:20:35,395 Uh, neuroses plus narcissism. 1622 01:20:36,614 --> 01:20:37,876 You know, you can take a night off 1623 01:20:37,920 --> 01:20:39,399 from being the consummate truth-teller. 1624 01:20:39,443 --> 01:20:41,314 I'’m sorry, it's a curse. 1625 01:20:43,360 --> 01:20:45,841 Have you talked to your dad? 1626 01:20:48,452 --> 01:20:51,455 We'’re giving each other some space at the moment. 1627 01:20:51,498 --> 01:20:53,109 That'’s probably not a bad idea. 1628 01:20:57,940 --> 01:21:00,377 You know, when I went on that research retreat, 1629 01:21:00,420 --> 01:21:04,120 we were exploring building electric cars in small villages in Africa. 1630 01:21:05,382 --> 01:21:08,254 The company offered to relocate me to Botswana. 1631 01:21:09,995 --> 01:21:11,301 Yeah? 1632 01:21:15,696 --> 01:21:18,830 Maybe I should do that. 1633 01:21:20,484 --> 01:21:22,181 I would miss you like crazy. 1634 01:21:24,227 --> 01:21:25,489 You too. 1635 01:21:34,411 --> 01:21:37,457 [fireworks whistling, booming on radio] 1636 01:21:37,501 --> 01:21:39,851 [woman on radio] We'’re back and coming to you live... 1637 01:21:39,895 --> 01:21:42,201 [soft music] 1638 01:22:09,141 --> 01:22:11,535 [line ringing] 1639 01:22:13,624 --> 01:22:15,539 [line ringing] 1640 01:22:15,582 --> 01:22:16,932 Hey, Dad... 1641 01:22:18,107 --> 01:22:20,500 I don'’t know if you're still avoiding me, or... 1642 01:22:20,544 --> 01:22:22,763 maybe you'’re at the New Year'’s Eve benefit. 1643 01:22:24,026 --> 01:22:25,723 Anyway, I-I just wanted to talk 1644 01:22:25,766 --> 01:22:27,420 before I leave for Africa. 1645 01:22:28,769 --> 01:22:30,946 Okay, bye. 1646 01:22:56,972 --> 01:22:59,017 Shouldn'’t you be inside? 1647 01:23:00,410 --> 01:23:02,064 Yeah. 1648 01:23:02,107 --> 01:23:04,196 So, why are you hanging out here? 1649 01:23:05,545 --> 01:23:08,244 Well, I haven'’t seen her since... 1650 01:23:09,114 --> 01:23:10,681 Well... 1651 01:23:12,030 --> 01:23:13,205 So... 1652 01:23:14,380 --> 01:23:15,773 So... 1653 01:23:19,690 --> 01:23:21,170 I was a real asshole. 1654 01:23:21,213 --> 01:23:24,260 Yep, grade-A shitbag. 1655 01:23:25,174 --> 01:23:26,740 Can you ever forgive me? 1656 01:23:26,784 --> 01:23:28,916 I think that'’s been part of my job description 1657 01:23:28,960 --> 01:23:30,875 since the moment you were born. 1658 01:23:32,833 --> 01:23:34,313 And, honestly, 1659 01:23:34,357 --> 01:23:37,795 I'’m probably not blameless in this whole thing. 1660 01:23:37,838 --> 01:23:40,319 So, is blaming you an option? 1661 01:23:40,363 --> 01:23:43,540 Well, yeah. I mean, what'’s it say about a guy like me 1662 01:23:43,583 --> 01:23:46,021 who raised a shitbag like you? 1663 01:23:50,416 --> 01:23:53,941 I think maybe, when Mom passed, 1664 01:23:53,985 --> 01:23:56,422 taking care of you gave me a purpose. 1665 01:23:58,729 --> 01:24:00,209 It was easier to worry about you 1666 01:24:00,252 --> 01:24:01,862 than to think about... 1667 01:24:01,906 --> 01:24:04,082 what I had lost or... 1668 01:24:04,126 --> 01:24:05,866 how I should move forward. 1669 01:24:05,910 --> 01:24:07,912 That makes two of us. 1670 01:24:09,087 --> 01:24:11,002 But we'’ll figure it out. 1671 01:24:14,397 --> 01:24:16,399 So you'’re nervous about seeing Brandy? 1672 01:24:18,183 --> 01:24:20,620 Yeah, I don'’t know what to say to her. 1673 01:24:21,926 --> 01:24:23,710 You'’ll know when the moment comes. 1674 01:24:24,929 --> 01:24:28,846 Now, I'’m not interfering in any way whatsoever. 1675 01:24:30,152 --> 01:24:33,546 But... maybe we can walk in together? 1676 01:24:34,243 --> 01:24:35,940 Yeah, yeah. 1677 01:24:37,985 --> 01:24:40,466 [muffled music] 1678 01:24:40,510 --> 01:24:43,078 [louder music] 1679 01:24:46,951 --> 01:24:50,302 [playing outro] 1680 01:24:50,346 --> 01:24:53,740 [cheering and applause] 1681 01:24:56,787 --> 01:24:58,571 Awesome. Hey, guys, 1682 01:24:58,615 --> 01:25:02,097 just wanted to say thank you so much for coming out tonight. 1683 01:25:04,621 --> 01:25:06,840 And I would especially like to thank 1684 01:25:06,884 --> 01:25:10,192 my co-host for the evening, Jack Lockhart. 1685 01:25:10,235 --> 01:25:13,499 Jack, would you like to come up and say a few words? 1686 01:25:13,543 --> 01:25:16,589 [applause] 1687 01:25:19,201 --> 01:25:20,332 Thanks, Brandy. 1688 01:25:21,594 --> 01:25:23,596 Um, good evening. Thanks for coming. 1689 01:25:23,640 --> 01:25:25,859 Um, really all I want to say is 1690 01:25:25,903 --> 01:25:28,819 all the credit for this incredible evening goes to Brandy, 1691 01:25:28,862 --> 01:25:31,996 who'’s shown nothing but grace under pressure. 1692 01:25:32,039 --> 01:25:34,390 And, um, getting here wasn'’t easy. 1693 01:25:34,433 --> 01:25:36,174 There were definitely some bumps in the road. 1694 01:25:36,218 --> 01:25:38,133 But when aren'’t there? 1695 01:25:38,176 --> 01:25:40,874 When you'’re in the right car from the right car company, 1696 01:25:40,918 --> 01:25:43,616 with the right people, the ride'’s worth a few bumps, 1697 01:25:43,660 --> 01:25:45,227 and we'’re all here together tonight. 1698 01:25:45,270 --> 01:25:48,273 So, well, heck, happy New Year! 1699 01:25:48,317 --> 01:25:50,362 Have a good evening, everyone! 1700 01:25:50,406 --> 01:25:54,192 [cheering and applause] 1701 01:25:54,236 --> 01:25:55,802 [applause continues] 1702 01:26:14,560 --> 01:26:16,519 When you said there were gonna be bumps in the road, 1703 01:26:16,562 --> 01:26:19,565 you meant the one giant bump, the-- the human 1704 01:26:19,609 --> 01:26:22,220 [over P.A.] lump of-- of pus. 1705 01:26:22,264 --> 01:26:24,266 [Jack] I don'’t think she's gonna give us a hard time anymore 1706 01:26:24,309 --> 01:26:25,789 and nothing she said changes 1707 01:26:25,832 --> 01:26:27,660 how you and I feel about each other. 1708 01:26:27,704 --> 01:26:30,272 Do you think that maybe she might'’ve been right 1709 01:26:30,315 --> 01:26:32,056 about certain things, though? 1710 01:26:33,362 --> 01:26:36,103 I don'’t like Moscato. 1711 01:26:36,147 --> 01:26:38,236 I'’m more of a cheap beer kind of girl. 1712 01:26:38,280 --> 01:26:40,934 Okay. 1713 01:26:40,978 --> 01:26:44,024 -Trip to the liquor store. Problem solved. -Yeah. 1714 01:26:44,068 --> 01:26:46,418 I'’m not that crazy about the shirts you gave me. 1715 01:26:46,462 --> 01:26:48,638 I'’m more of a blue button-down kind of guy. 1716 01:26:48,681 --> 01:26:51,380 That'’s fine. I wasn'’t trying to change you. 1717 01:26:51,423 --> 01:26:55,471 -I don'’t think I wanna move to Los Angeles. -Oh, okay. 1718 01:26:57,647 --> 01:27:00,476 -I think I might want kids. -Mmm... 1719 01:27:00,519 --> 01:27:02,521 [over P.A.] We can talk about that. 1720 01:27:03,827 --> 01:27:05,872 [Brandy] I mean, I don'’t know for sure, 1721 01:27:05,916 --> 01:27:07,961 because I still sprint to the drugstore if the condom breaks, 1722 01:27:08,005 --> 01:27:09,136 for the Plan B pills. 1723 01:27:10,399 --> 01:27:14,794 Um, noted. Better condoms. 1724 01:27:14,838 --> 01:27:16,405 Uh, I don'’t think we'’re gonna have 1725 01:27:16,448 --> 01:27:18,145 to think about that for a few years. 1726 01:27:18,189 --> 01:27:21,018 -And by then, I'’ll be impotent. -Important! 1727 01:27:21,061 --> 01:27:23,803 What is so important about tonight, 1728 01:27:23,847 --> 01:27:26,241 [over P.A.] uh, is the urgent cause 1729 01:27:26,284 --> 01:27:28,678 that we are all here to address, 1730 01:27:28,721 --> 01:27:31,681 our city'’s homeless community. 1731 01:27:31,724 --> 01:27:33,639 So thank you all for your donations, 1732 01:27:33,683 --> 01:27:35,119 -and why don'’t you give yourselves... -What? 1733 01:27:35,162 --> 01:27:36,816 ...another round of applause for that? 1734 01:27:36,860 --> 01:27:38,688 [applause] 1735 01:27:40,777 --> 01:27:43,997 -I would also like to thank Brandy... -[mouthing] What? 1736 01:27:44,041 --> 01:27:47,087 ...for being a true force of nature. 1737 01:27:47,131 --> 01:27:50,090 You all heard what she feels about me. 1738 01:27:50,134 --> 01:27:52,397 I mean, don'’t get me wrong, she, uh, 1739 01:27:52,441 --> 01:27:55,270 really got under my skin. 1740 01:27:55,313 --> 01:27:58,882 I mean, sometimes you just wanna strangle her 1741 01:27:58,925 --> 01:28:00,579 until the breath leaves her body. 1742 01:28:00,623 --> 01:28:02,799 [woman] Oh, that'’s the human lump of pus! 1743 01:28:02,842 --> 01:28:05,497 [laughter] 1744 01:28:05,541 --> 01:28:10,110 But, I mean, you have to respect someone who means what she says, 1745 01:28:10,154 --> 01:28:14,506 means well, and makes the people that I love happy. 1746 01:28:16,247 --> 01:28:17,640 And I think, maybe in another life, 1747 01:28:17,683 --> 01:28:19,772 we might'’ve been friends. 1748 01:28:21,861 --> 01:28:25,430 Uh, '’cause that's what life'’s about, right? 1749 01:28:25,474 --> 01:28:28,303 People and connection. 1750 01:28:29,565 --> 01:28:32,176 I know it'’s getting close to midnight, so, 1751 01:28:32,219 --> 01:28:34,265 why don'’t we put the past behind us 1752 01:28:34,309 --> 01:28:36,833 and say hello to the future? 1753 01:28:37,790 --> 01:28:39,836 -Happy New Year! -[all] Ten, nine... 1754 01:28:39,879 --> 01:28:41,881 So we have a lot of obstacles to overcome. 1755 01:28:41,925 --> 01:28:43,883 -...six, five... -We do. 1756 01:28:43,927 --> 01:28:47,670 ...four, three, two, one! 1757 01:28:47,713 --> 01:28:52,022 -Happy New Year! -[all cheering] 1758 01:29:03,294 --> 01:29:05,992 [soft music] 1759 01:29:20,311 --> 01:29:22,139 [distant car horn honking] 1760 01:29:27,274 --> 01:29:28,711 [car door closing] 1761 01:29:49,819 --> 01:29:53,518 -Still drive that thing? -Yeah. 1762 01:29:54,563 --> 01:29:56,478 If it ain'’t broke, why fix it? 1763 01:30:00,656 --> 01:30:04,355 So, what'’re you doing here? I saw you leaving the bar. 1764 01:30:05,704 --> 01:30:07,402 I realized you-- 1765 01:30:07,445 --> 01:30:09,404 you left something at my place. 1766 01:30:10,317 --> 01:30:12,276 Mmm, no, I don'’t think so. 1767 01:30:12,319 --> 01:30:14,321 Yeah, yeah, you did. 1768 01:30:14,365 --> 01:30:16,019 Pretty sure I didn'’t. 1769 01:30:17,063 --> 01:30:19,152 [chuckling] Then what'’s this? 1770 01:30:19,762 --> 01:30:23,330 Your hairless cat? 1771 01:30:23,374 --> 01:30:24,419 Right.Yeah. 1772 01:30:24,462 --> 01:30:26,072 Thank you.And... 1773 01:30:26,116 --> 01:30:28,640 Mmm-hmm?Your Fabergé egg. 1774 01:30:28,684 --> 01:30:30,512 I was wondering where that went. 1775 01:30:30,555 --> 01:30:34,516 Thank you.Yes, and... 1776 01:30:34,559 --> 01:30:36,474 a limited edition Goblet of Fire. 1777 01:30:36,518 --> 01:30:38,258 Oh, wow.Yeah. 1778 01:30:38,302 --> 01:30:40,043 -Thank you. -Yeah, you'’re welcome. 1779 01:30:40,086 --> 01:30:42,175 You'’re so weird. [chuckling] 1780 01:30:42,219 --> 01:30:44,830 You know, I needed these before I leave. 1781 01:30:44,874 --> 01:30:48,834 Yeah. Africa, huh? 1782 01:30:48,878 --> 01:30:50,749 Yeah.Whoa. 1783 01:30:51,794 --> 01:30:55,014 -That feels sudden. -Yeah. 1784 01:30:55,058 --> 01:30:57,016 Sometimes you just need a change. 1785 01:30:58,017 --> 01:30:59,323 Yeah. 1786 01:31:00,585 --> 01:31:01,891 You know, 1787 01:31:01,934 --> 01:31:04,981 I'’ve always wanted to go to Africa. 1788 01:31:05,024 --> 01:31:08,550 Shoot giraffes. Pictures, photos, yeah. 1789 01:31:08,593 --> 01:31:10,290 Thank you for clarifying. 1790 01:31:11,378 --> 01:31:13,250 How about you take me with you? 1791 01:31:14,164 --> 01:31:15,687 You serious? 1792 01:31:18,081 --> 01:31:20,779 Yeah... I am. 1793 01:31:24,174 --> 01:31:27,220 Now that sounds like a true crime murder mystery. 1794 01:31:27,264 --> 01:31:30,572 -We both go on a safari, but only one of us comes back? -Mmm-hmm. 1795 01:31:30,615 --> 01:31:34,314 Just to be clear, I would be the murderer, and you would be the "murderee," 1796 01:31:34,358 --> 01:31:36,534 because I know 37 different ways that you can poison someone 1797 01:31:36,578 --> 01:31:38,144 without leaving a trace. 1798 01:31:42,975 --> 01:31:44,586 [car horn honking] 1799 01:31:49,155 --> 01:31:51,070 Babe, watch this. 1800 01:31:53,812 --> 01:31:56,119 Hey, kid, you'’re blocking the driveway. 1801 01:31:56,162 --> 01:31:58,034 Dad. 1802 01:31:58,077 --> 01:32:00,384 You break my daughter'’s heart, and I'’ll kill ya. 1803 01:32:00,427 --> 01:32:03,518 Hey, leave them alone. He wants to kiss her. 1804 01:32:04,519 --> 01:32:06,390 God, you ruin everything. 1805 01:32:08,305 --> 01:32:10,568 [Josh] Actually, you ruin everything. 1806 01:32:10,612 --> 01:32:13,919 Seriously, move out of the driveway. Go on, get. 1807 01:32:13,963 --> 01:32:15,834 ♪ ...season That gives me hope♪ 1808 01:32:15,878 --> 01:32:17,836 ♪ There is a reason♪ 1809 01:32:17,880 --> 01:32:20,578 ♪ For all that We'’ve been through♪ 1810 01:32:20,622 --> 01:32:23,320 ♪ That something new'’s Around the corner♪ 1811 01:32:23,363 --> 01:32:25,278 ♪ Everybody'’s laughing♪ 1812 01:32:25,322 --> 01:32:27,585 ♪ Leaving what'’s past There in the past♪ 1813 01:32:27,629 --> 01:32:31,197 ♪ And I'’m so glad I'’m sitting next to you♪ 1814 01:32:31,241 --> 01:32:34,592 ♪ Glad that we had Made it through this year♪ 1815 01:32:34,636 --> 01:32:37,203 ♪ Everybody come together♪ 1816 01:32:37,247 --> 01:32:39,423 ♪ Focus on what matters♪ 1817 01:32:39,466 --> 01:32:41,904 ♪ We don'’t have to be alone♪ 1818 01:32:41,947 --> 01:32:45,211 ♪ We can make this place A home this year♪ 1819 01:32:45,255 --> 01:32:47,649 ♪ No time like the present♪ 1820 01:32:47,692 --> 01:32:50,042 ♪ To lay down our defenses♪ 1821 01:32:50,086 --> 01:32:52,610 ♪ We don'’t have to be alone♪ 1822 01:32:52,654 --> 01:32:55,918 ♪ We can make this place A home this year♪ 1823 01:32:55,961 --> 01:32:58,355 ♪ Doo-doo-doo-doo Doo doo-doo-doo♪ 1824 01:32:58,398 --> 01:33:00,618 ♪ Doo-doo-doo-doo Doo doo-doo♪ 1825 01:33:00,662 --> 01:33:04,187 ♪ We don'’t have To be alone, oh no♪ 1826 01:33:05,623 --> 01:33:07,756 ♪ No, we'’re dreaming About tomorrow♪ 1827 01:33:07,799 --> 01:33:10,889 ♪ Watching the snow fall Out the window♪ 1828 01:33:10,933 --> 01:33:13,892 ♪ I'’ve got a new ambition No more wishing♪ 1829 01:33:13,936 --> 01:33:17,243 ♪ I'’ll be by your side This year♪ 1830 01:33:17,287 --> 01:33:19,855 ♪ Everybody come together♪ 1831 01:33:19,898 --> 01:33:22,031 ♪ Focus on what matters♪ 1832 01:33:22,074 --> 01:33:24,599 ♪ We don'’t have to be alone♪ 1833 01:33:24,642 --> 01:33:28,603 ♪ We can make this place A home this year♪ 1834 01:33:30,648 --> 01:33:33,259 ♪ Everybody come together♪ 1835 01:33:33,303 --> 01:33:35,305 ♪ Focus on what matters♪ 1836 01:33:35,348 --> 01:33:37,873 ♪ We don'’t have to be alone♪ 1837 01:33:37,916 --> 01:33:41,224 ♪ We can make this place A home this year♪ 1838 01:33:41,267 --> 01:33:43,705 ♪ No time like the present♪ 1839 01:33:43,748 --> 01:33:46,011 ♪ To lay down our defenses♪ 1840 01:33:46,055 --> 01:33:48,579 ♪ We don'’t have to be alone♪ 1841 01:33:48,623 --> 01:33:51,843 ♪ We can make this place A home this year♪ 1842 01:33:51,887 --> 01:33:54,541 ♪ Doo-doo-doo-doo Doo doo-doo-doo♪ 1843 01:33:54,585 --> 01:33:56,674 ♪ Doo-doo-doo Doo-doo doo-doo-doo♪ 1844 01:33:56,718 --> 01:34:00,199 ♪ We don'’t have To be alone, oh no♪ 1845 01:34:02,637 --> 01:34:05,161 ♪ Everybody come together♪ 1846 01:34:05,204 --> 01:34:07,380 ♪ Focus on what matters♪ 1847 01:34:07,424 --> 01:34:09,992 ♪ We don'’t have to be alone♪ 1848 01:34:10,035 --> 01:34:13,169 ♪ We can make this place A home this year♪ 1849 01:34:13,212 --> 01:34:15,693 ♪ No time like the present♪ 1850 01:34:15,737 --> 01:34:18,000 ♪ To lay down our defenses♪ 1851 01:34:18,043 --> 01:34:20,698 ♪ We don'’t have to be alone♪ 1852 01:34:20,742 --> 01:34:24,789 ♪ We can make this place A home this year♪ 1853 01:34:26,095 --> 01:34:28,750 ♪ Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh♪ 1854 01:34:28,793 --> 01:34:32,667 ♪ Ooh-ooh-ooh Ooh-ooh-ooh♪ 1855 01:34:34,538 --> 01:34:37,715 [song ends] 126818