Original subtitles

YEAR 2021

This story started 15 years ago...

YEAR 2005

...at a time when people relied on TV, radio and the newspapers...

...to make their dreams come true, not social media or smart phones.

SMT. PHOOLSAKHI MINISTER OF TOURISM

Like many others these two also dreamt of fame, money and comforts...

Oh yes, those very two, Bunty and Babli.

YASH RAJ FILMS PRESENTS

And boy did their dreams come true!

Their names rung out across this country.

They were masters of deception.

They conned in ways no one had ever seen or heard before.

They didn't bother with 'rights' and 'wrongs'.

All they knew was - they were right... and the world was wrong.

Alas... this cat-n-mouse of right and wrong came to an end one day.

They were never really caught "officially"...

people hadn't even seen their calling-card in years.

Or heard about them in the news.

But as they say... "old habits die hard."

A little bird told us... the rascals might be back at it again!

BUNTY AUR BABLI 2

18% of the world's population lives in India.

Every opportunity has a million suitors.

When the competition is this cut-throat, you only have two choices...

...either stand in line and await your turn,

or you take a leap and jump straight to the front of the line.

Sanju, quit standing there like a statue and get me a beer... chilled!

My name's not Sanju.

My name is...

Kunal Singh.

I gave 4 years to finish computer engineering...

...from a dusty college in a sleepy town...

...and then 3 more to sitting at home, waiting for a job.

My parents think I work in IT in the swanky city of Gurgaon...

...as was their dream.

What I really do is organise these drunken soirees for creepy...

...old Delhi Businessmen.

But after today... it's all gonna change.

The love of my life and my future wife is about to enter...

SONIA RAWAT

She was the only beautiful thing about those 4 years of college.

Our love wasn't exactly at first sight.

But boy, what a sight she was, anyone could fall for her.

Ready sir.

Take it away Doll!

'Tanatan Travel & Events' present - Virgin Republic!

Party destination of the 21st century.

Where anything goes!

What godforsaken place is this?

I thought you were going to give us a taste of Bangkok or Pattaya?!

Sir even Bangkok and Pattaya must've seemed godforsaken to you...

...before someone told you about the angels from there, no?!

Damn right!

Anyway, Virgin Island is a tiny liberal island country,

where the male-female ratio is so skewed...

...that there's 3 girls for every man.

And they're so pretty they could give Katrina a run for her money!

All of this...for only 500,000 rupees.

Payment in cash to ensure full secrecy...

...because we live to serve the customer sir!

Oh no, no, no!

It's too risky man!

What if my nosy wife smells it on me, and finds out what I've been up to!

Oh, c'mon, Mr. Chaddha sir...

You've been Singing in the Rain with these ladies for so long...

...has she ever smelt it on you?!

Rascal, you know us so well.

Mr. Chaddha sir...

I just have one humble request...

The air hostesses on the Virgin Republic chartered flight...

...are a bit skimpily clad.

Promise me you guys will at least keep it in your pants...

...till the flight touches down on the Virgin runway!

Listen Sanju...

I'm sold - Virgins, here we come!

TANATAN TRAVELS

A complimentary gift hamper from Tanatan Travels.

Can I open it?

Oh no, no sir! You open it over there... It's a surprise.

Oh! For the virgins?!

Take it! Take it!

NEW DELHI INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT

Er... Abhishek, how's it going?

Good evening, sir. Welcome to virgin virgo charter.

Thank you for choosing our flight.

Thank you, passport.

Here are our passports!

Hand us our boarding passes and point us to the VIP gate!

What's up?

Sir please come with me!

Sanju's a genius... Look at this VIP treatment!

What's this?

Um.. sir...

Who were you going to arrest gentlemen?

'Be Naughty'?

Why?

You having trouble sleeping at night?

Papaya flavour?!

I'd heard of banana & peach, but... Papaya?

What has Sanju gotten us into?!

- Mr. Chaddha, do something! - Quiet! Lemme talk to him.

You can check our visas and tickets.

In fact, we've booked the VIP package.

- Isn't it guys? - That's right! Ya!

My dear horny toads...

...there's no country by the name of Virgin Republic!

Your tickets and visas are fake!

We've been duped!

Yo Inspector Ashok Kumar.

Yes sir!

Take them away...

...and make sure they get "our" VIP package, ya?

Sanju, you rascal!!!

As we take this giant leap, I was reminded of my father's words...

"You need two things to get ahead in life - Honesty and a lack of greed."

But I believe screwing over the dishonest...

...is the highest form of honesty.

And you have to prey on the greedy because it's bound to turn them blind.

And the blind will follow you blindly into any direction... to any end!

Now that we were reborn as thugs... we also needed a cool gangster name.

So without trying to get too creative,

we started a franchise of the only two thugs...

...who had neither been caught before...

...nor been seen anyone.

"Bunty and Babli"

PHURSATGUNJ, UP

I fall to restless pieces, don't look at me that way.

A town full of men in ruin surrenders to what I say.

BACHHI MISHRA TONSURE CELEBRATION

I stretch with desire, I take my bow.

I stretch with desire, I take my bow.

Night eyes...

Night eyes...your night eyes...

Careful bro! You'll ruin Rakesh's Blazer!

Night eyes...

RAKESH TRIVEDI

How do I look?

Looks good, but it's a wee bit tight.

Of course it is! It's what I wore at my wedding!

Sengar, man... stop staring! It's just me...

Not Mandakini bathing under a waterfall!

Make me a drink man!

Ready-already!

At your service bro!

One's not enough. Encore!

I'm a little performance anxious man!

What a stage-shattering performance by...

Mishra's aunty's neighbour's sister-in-law's niece - Rinku!

A big round of applause for Rinku!

You're a star my child. Run along.

And now... the last, most dazzling performance of the evening.

Please welcome on stage... the pride...

...the couple blue-eyed of B block, Railway colony...

Brother Rakesh... and Sister Vimmi!

A huge round of applause...

Move that million dollar waist... make it go so low!

Dhik chik dhik chik...

Smashing!

Dhik chik dhik chik...

Burn up the dance floor girl... let's take it nice and slow.

Dhik chik dhik chik...

Fire and Ice!

Dhik chik dhik chik...

Make it worth my while

I spent a bomb on the DJ... just give me a smile.

Drop a hint or two... or a kiss at me, could you blow?

Dhik chik dhik chik...

Dhik chik dhik chik...

Dhik chik dhik chik...

Dhik chik dhik chik...

Long live, Sister Vimmi!!

Love, you're this close to being a 'has been'.

Stop boogeying like you're seventeen.

You aint the only one watching my waist.

Stop trying to make a scene!

Look at all of them talk...

You've made such a mess...

We're gonna be the laughing stock.

I'mma pay for lettin you dance... blow by blow

Dhik chik dhik chik...

Dhik chik dhik chik...

I ain't movin my waist or nothin...

Way to go Mummy!

I ain't takin nothin slow!

Dhik chik dhik chik...

Dhik chik dhik chik...

You ain't worth a single smile

Who asked you to spend a bomb on all this style?!

No hints, no kisses... only my shoe at you could I throw!

Dhik chik dhik chik...

Dhik chik dhik chik...

Dhik chik dhik chik...

Dhik chik dhik chik...

Dhik chik dhik chik...

Dhik chik dhik chik...

Brother has a tummy the size of rick... But sister is still dhik chik dhik chik!

Dhik chik dhik chik...

Dhik chik dhik chik...

Dhik chik dhik chik...

Dhik chik dhik chik...

You spilled your drink on my wedding suit!

Bro, throw in a couple more slaps... he's wet me too!

Bro... it's sis!

VIMMI TRIVEDI

Dhik Chik...Dhik Chik, all ruined!

Vimmi!

Mom, I need Ranveer Singh hairdo.

Zip it and finish your eggs or I'll give you Anupam Kher hairdo.

Vimmi, put the dye in my hair... I'm getting late!

This man is going to be the end of me!

Mummy!

You're so cute when you're angry!

My little piggy... I've spoilt you.

Vimmi!!...

Sorry about last night.

Sorry?!

Why the hell do you drink when you can't handle it?

You know I've only ever wanted two things in my life...

...to win Miss India and to dance.

Four months I practiced for this performance.

I got blisters in my hands trying to stitch that Sabyasachi knock off gown.

Everybody loved my look...

...and praised it, but you shat all over it!

Took you just 2 drinks to turn into Mr. Make-a-scene!

You think I didn't put in effort for last night?

That buffoon got drunk and puked all over my new suit...

I couldn't control myself.

- I'd barely got past the opening verse. - That's why I am saying SORRY!

The zonal manager's coming in for an inspection.

Dye my hair... I can't be late.

And be a little thorough love...

Don't miss a spot, okay?

Spot.

There goes all of it...

Now you make sure you don't miss a spot!

Cops?

Hey, I didn't whack that buffoon too hard, did I?

Hardly.

Your son's all grown up now, eh? Hello kids!

Hello uncle.

Mr. Bunty, where have you been all these years?!

And where's our Mrs. Babli?

Hope all is well and swell?

Rakesh... you know I get sunburnt easily! I'll get rashes.

Hey, just tells us what you want from us?

Why have you tied us to a chair in this sweltering heat?

My baby is alone at home.

Mrs. Babli, he's coming all the way from Lucknow.

Who?

He'll tell you once he's here.

"He" Who?

Is it Inspector Dashrath Singh?

Dashrath Singh has long since retired.

You'll see for yourself.

Man, there's a train approaching!

Get us off this track!

Who's gonna take care of the house, if I'm wounded?

I've left the washing machine on and the veggies on the stove.

My little boy will pass out if doesn't get his meal on time!

Will you say something Rakesh?!

I will, if you ever let me get a word in!

Bro... why are you guys hell bent on...

...turning this family drama into an action film?!

The train's almost here Rakesh! Pappu...

He'd announced he'll come for them on the same train...

...Dashrath sir had let them off in.

And now he's arrived on a bloody survey cart.

Sir...

Are we there?

Gupta, this is blasphemy!

Untie them... they're celebrities man!

Of course, sir.

Myself Jatayu Singh.

I feel blessed to be in your company yet again!

Yet again? When did we meet before?

Dude, I was part of Dashrath sir's troop... more of a backbencher.

Strange are the wheels of destiny...

The backbencher is now in front and those in front stand sidelined!

Isn't Mr. Gupta?

I'm your biggest fan!

This morning we received a nation-wide red alert...

...that Bunty and Babli have struck again!

I must say the 'Virgin conjob' was sheer genius!

Virgin con job?

At least last time around... you sold Taj Mahal to a bunch of foreigners...

which is real.

But this time you sold a country to your own countrymen...

...that doesn't even exist!

That's some upgrade... Bunty and Babli 2.0!

What nonsense!

We've not sold anything to anyone.

We gave up this line of work a long time back.

- Mr. Gupta. - Yes sir.

Please do the honours. Kindly broadcast it!

Yes.

- Broadcast? - Here we go.

We're about to show you how these two conned...

...a bunch of Delhi businessmen with the lure of easy sex.

In a made-up country called Virgin Republic where "anything goes".

...but left them with nothing.

These conmen are none other than the long retired and famous thugs -

Bunty and Babli!

No, no sir, we didn't do this.

Sir this is amateurish.

Any two-bit swindler can pull this off.

Set the mood with the pics of hot girls,

jazz it up with some fancy English and promise low risk-high reward.

Swanky hotel, big cars and cash payments.

No Vimmi?

Impressive Mr. Bunty...

Just because Tendulkar has retired...

...you think he's forgotten how to hit the ball?

We didn't do this dirty con-job! We're a simple Indian family now.

That's some story!

It's your style, your names and your calling card...

and yet we're supposed to believe that this isn't you?!

Yes.

Our conning days are like hair on a bald head.

Once upon a time.

Well said.

Bravo Rakesh!

Our only highlights these days is either figuring out cooking gas...

...or playing down Pappu's mischief in school...

...or finding gray hair on our heads!

We were at the Mr. Mishra's house... for his son's baptism ceremony.

Pappu even put out some photos and videos on that...er...

Facebook!

Ya, he's shared them on Facebook. Feel free to check.

I've been a ticket checker at local train station for years.

They use a biometric scanner every time.

Have to thumb-scan even when I go for a piss.

You can check the record!

Sir, I think they're telling the truth.

I doubt their family duties leaves them time for anything else!

No!

These guys are thoroughbred liars. I'm sure they're messing with us.

Keep them locked for a few days.

Ok sir.

But if they didn't do it, then who could it be?

You need to stop fingering your phone 24 hours a day.

I'm on Tinder dad.

- Namaste Mr. Chaubey. - Namaste!

Who's this chick?

She's... just a friend.

Just a friend my foot!

Stop right there. You can't go ahead.

Hey watch your tone, I'm the mayor of this town.

I mean there's a bunch of VIPs up ahead. It's NO ENTRY!

That equipment. Show me.

Dad, Black Cat Commandos!

Hail Mother India! Long live the revolution!

Who is he?

He's my son.

You tell me who is that!

She is Prime Minister's scientific advisor,

specially appointed to oversee the cleaning of River Ganga!

No, it's very bad.

Let's go Shekhar.

Madam it will be cleaned.

USELESS!

And who's this guy?

Doesn't look like her son... must be her secretary!

You're wasting time.

No ma'am, processing data is taking too much time.

Useless tools... useless people.

Prime Minister's Scientific advisor...

We've to get in on this!

I'm Chutvaa Chaubey!

KL Shekhar.

I know you're from the Prime Minister's office.

We are honoured sir... and so is our town!

Hey! What're you doing?

Please make me meet your madam?

What is this! Stop tickling me...

Don't you like tickles!

Sir, you will get wet!

- What? - Splash back!

I can handle such splashes.

I'm the mayor of this town.

- We need to follow the procedure. - To hell with procedures!

Ok, ok.

Our river Ganga! For lease!?

Meaning?

Meaning anyone can lease the river!

Ganga!

How?

As part of Public-Private partnerships...

...the government will grant one company in every city...

...rights to clean the river.

In return, the company can use the river water however it wants...

...to recover its investments.

Wow... Unbelievable!

Hey Golu!

He's my son - Golu Chaubey!

I am public, he is private!

There's your public-private partnership.

It's so simple!

You can give Golu's company the contract for our city...

And we can figure out what you need to make that happen!

It's not that simple Mr. Chaubey.

I'll get this river so bloody clean within 2 days...

...that you'll be able to see the riverbed!

- Two days? - Two days.

Okay, stop wasting my time like this!

I can't find her online at all.

- What are you saying...? - Zilch! Have a look.

NO RESULTS FOUND

- Golu. - What?

Golu says the internet doesn't seem to recognise you.

- There's nothing. - Zero.

Nil.

- What the hell Shekhar?! - Yes ma'am?

You still haven't added my name to the PMO's website?

Ma'am I had informed the IT department...

And then?

Must've been delayed...

And what about this nonsense?!

Meaning?

Now because of your delay...

...some random guy is questioning my authority!

I'm not some random guy... I'm the mayor madam!

- Is this okay? - No ma'am.

- Then what to do? - I will just check it.

No need... Forget about it... thank you very much.

This meeting is over!

No no no, give me one minute ma'am.

Yes?

I respect ladies...

Golu, say sorry!

Ma'am, please pardon our blunder.

- Listen Golum... - His name is Golu.

Same thing.

Your internet is a god or what?

If I am not on internet... do I not exist?

It's ringing mister.

- What is? - Your phone!

Bloody hell...

Hello!

Where are you mate?

Just grabbing a bite bro.

Why haven't you added madam's name to the website?

Crap!

I forgot to redirect the hotel router!

You'll get us killed! Hurry up!

Give me 30 seconds.

You seem to be quite the internet geek, tell me...

How many followers do you have on social media?

4,000!

4000. What is your neighbour's name?

- Err... I don't know. - Shameless!

How will you know if you're always buried in your phone?

Come on...

What is the first thing you do, when you go on internet... I want to see.

- My battery is low. - Is it?

Lying in front of your father!

Done!

Get a grip on your son... he's out of control.

Mr. Golu Chaubey, check, check.

Madam's name on PMO site under officials name.

See?

There's enough battery for that.

Yes.

It's...there.

It's there? Apologies to her right now... little brat!

Ma'am, we've made a huge mistake. Please forgive me!

Can we start tomorrow please?

Keep going... Get it all done.

It should be sparkling clean.

Squeeze it all out!

Come on, faster!

Photographer! Click me.

Stop pulling over there... this is the spot.

Right there. Ya!

LASH GHAT

KAILASH GHAT

Mr. Priest!!!

No!!!

Long live our holy river!

Sir.

Long live the holy Ganga!

God bless you.

Ganga Lease Agreement

I still can't believe someone's actually leased out the river Ganga to us!

Neither can we!

Golu Mineral Water

Are you trying to break it?

How dare you stop me!

I stopped you because we've received a tip that...

...you're about to sell the Ganga water without permission!

I deal with the Prime Minister's office!

I've leased ganga for the next 5 years.

No one can stop me. I can do whatever I want.

Show him the permit!

Here, read this. It's in English though.

Lemme know if you want me to read it out for you!

Sir, this is from Ms. Malini and Mr. Shekhar.

Mr. Mayor got played by Bunty and Babli!

Bunty.

Babli.

GANGA ON LEASE! BUNTY AND BABLI CON FOR GOOD CAUSE

Love you mate...!

That was a lot of fun guys! You guys killed it!

Couldn't have done it without you.

- Shall we? - We must.

Give us a minute mate.

Of course.

You maybe a Pro, but they're the cons...

Gonna steal your golden chain and locket,

Gonna leave with it in their pocket.

Is it a bird, is it a plane?!?

It's all up for sale!

Game change... Bunty & Babli

A bigger range, but the same name...

Bunty & Babli!

Jatayu is a crook

Hey... who is it?

I'm really sorry!

I was wrong.

There's been another Bunty-Babli scam right here, in our state.

Your state-sponsored vacation ends here.

Hope you enjoyed our hospitality!

Another scam?

Who the hell is stinkin up the joint in our names?

You worry about our own joint!

My baby's home alone since so many days!

God knows how Pappu must be living without us.

Come, let's go!

Baby loves to groove on bass

Baby loves to groove on bass

Baby loves to groove on bass

The dazzling dame has upped her game

Baby loves to groove on bass

The dazzling dame has upped her game

Baby loves to groove on bass

Pappu.

Pappu!

Wait till I get hold of you!

Now I'm sure he's my son.

Sir, this app is a powerful tool...

...that can empower housewives to turn into entrepreneurs!

This could be interesting...

Nice idea.

But let us come back to her.

- OK sir. Alright. - Thank you.

Thank you so much.

- Thank you. - Thank you, sir.

How was the presentation babe?

Like it always is.

They always find the idea "nice" and "interesting" but can't fund it.

Because I got no experience.

I think I'll have to fund my food app... myself.

We can figure it out together...

...we'll put our engineering degree to some use.

Listen, I don't want to do a shoddy job of it.

My app's got to have a country-wide roll out...

...promotions, million dollar funding.

Millions! You get it? It's no joke.

- Now, let's go. - Where?

I know we decided to do this only once or twice...

...but now I'm wondering... why stop?

In fact, I'm beginning to understand why Honesty just isn't the best policy!

Why?

Because dishonesty is so god-damned easy!!? And so much fun!

Yeah... but if we do this for too long we're bound to end up in jail!

As soon as I have enough money for my app... I'm out.

You can keep doing this alone if you want...

Bunty can't do squat without his Babli!

Our con works because you can plan and I can execute.

Without a plan, what the heck am I going to pull off?

What will I do without you?

How do I know?

Life is funny.

Till a few days back, this used to be our dream.

A 9 to 5 job at a multinational firm, suit and tie.

Thank god none of it came true.

Are you still hung up on it?

Nope.

Hi sir. Hi ma'am.

We are taking signature for child malnutrition and food wastage.

If you like to join the cause it will just take a minute of your time.

- Ya sure why not. - Come with me.

STOP WASTING FOOD. START FEEDING HUNGRY

So we are an NGO called Combat Malnutrition.

THEY NEED FOOD AND WATER

FIGHT FOR A HUNGER-FREE INDIA

Pretending to be the PM's scientific advisors... they robbed the mayor...

promising him to lease out the river ganga.

Today, on Criminals... Bunty and Babli.

Names that are back on everyone's lips.

The police are clueless while the amused public wonders...

...who's going to be their next target?

Mom!

Oh my baby, I'm so sorry! Are you hurt my Pappu.

Who's here at this hour?

Rinku?

The gravy is delicious Mrs. Babli.

Lemme get to the point.

I don't do stuff myself.

I like getting it done.

Bunty-Babli 2.0 are making my ulcers bleed.

There's a lot of pressure to make an arrest.

Be it those guys... or you two.

Like Dashrath Sir once said...

"The world is made of two kinds of people,

one - those who never break the law and never go to prison.

And two - those who don't break the law, and yet end up in prison!"

And if you two don't want to be the second kind...

...you must help us nab these two.

After all, you two are veterans of this game.

Sir, we've simple domestic life for ourselves... We have a child.

How can you expect us to leave everything...

...and starting playing police for you?

You misunderstood...

This isn't a request. It's an order.

Pappu, my child!

Easy does it son.

You gotta work on that soft landing eh, big guy?

Don't jinx my little boy!

Till you finish the job, I can look after Mr. Pappu here.

I'll see you at the police station tomorrow.

I hope I don't have to come back here again.

How'd we get caught up in Jatayu's mess?

It's not child's play, catching these two.

We've been out of the game for years.

The tricks of the trade, the technology, everything has changed in that time.

What's on your mind?

We worked hard to build a brand like "Bunty & Babli"...

...and now a couple of clowns are destroying it.

And all I do is cook well done eggs...

...and get pushed around like petty thieves by night.

Boils my blood too, to be honest.

It feels like someone's pissing all over our precious work of art...

...and we can't do a thing about it!

We should've got a copyright on our brand.

Listen up Rakesh.

You need to take a leave from work.

We are the real Bunty-Babli... not them!

How dare they use our brand... this is war.

I won't rest till we nab them and slap them silly.

Attagirl my desi girl!

Cue the slo-mo... here we go again.

Ladies and gentlemen

Finally

Your favourite DUO is back!

Times have changed so has the regime

Even money isn't worth, what it seems

Look who's back... after all these years...

Thick as thieves, they gonna reappear

The moon might pale,

The sun could lose it's fire

But they ain't gonna never retire...

Bunty and Babli

Bunty and Babli

Bunty and Babli

Bunty and Babli

Hallelujah... they still go it...

Here we go... they're back at it!

Oho... Oho

Bunty and Babli

Bunty and Babli

They still own this town...

They could take anybody down...

Oho... Oho... Oho

It's useless.

There's CCTV everywhere.

If these two are any good, they won't reveal their real faces to anyone.

Looks like there's a new circus in town...

What's this, a midlife crisis or something?

Gupta, how many birds can you kill with one stone?

2... at the most.

I'm gonna kill 4!

According to records, Bunty & Babli have never been arrested...

...but they will now, along with the two new ones.

Two old and two new... How many birds is that Gupta?

4... sir!

And who then becomes the Commissioner of Police?

You sir.

What a masterstroke!

Bunty babli strike again!

After Ganga con they have done grain con.

They have cleaned off thousand tonnes of grain from government godown.

A 1000 tons of food grains worth millions...

...with the help of the greedy depot manager!

That's exactly what we wanted to know, thank you.

Sir.

Sir, we have the information.

A transport company just leased out 10 trucks to a fake name.

They're headed to Kanpur.

Kanpur has the largest food grain market!

That's where they'll go to sell the grains.

Correct.

And since the stuff is stolen they will have to deal in cash... buttloads of it!

We just need to find a trader in Kanpur who can buy...

...and sell such a large quantity of food grains!

Very well, you best leave for Nagpur.

Kanpur, sir.

Ya, ya Kanpur.

- Gupta? - Yes sir.

Accompany them.

Pandey, let's go.

It didn't take us long to find that big trader in Kanpur.

He was Thehrey Singh.

Thehrey Singh?

We want to sell some food grain...

...stolen.

My sources tell me, you can get us buyers?

How much?

A thousand tonnes.

Babli?

Bunty?

Do I look like Babli must be my name?

You don't look like a Bunty either...

...but weren't you gonna call and tell me where to meet?

To hell with the phone, how on earth can you think I'm -

Rakesh!

They called him!

They were to tell him where to meet...

"They?" So you're not Bunty-Babli?

No! We're their worst nightmares!

Get it?

And now you'll do exactly what we tell you to do.

And why would that be?

Inspector Gupta?

I must admit... this is a lot of fun.

We still got that chemistry, don't we?

Let's go. Time for action!

Oh okay.

Tomorrow morning.

At the Holi fair on Chamanganj Sqare.

The colours rain

The colours rain on the veiled maiden...

The colours rain on the veiled maiden...

The colours rain on the veiled maiden...

The colours rain

The maiden serves him on a golden platter

Thehrey Singh?

The maiden serves him on a golden platter

Step aside.

Catch them.

Hey, why you grabbing us?

We got 500 rupees to do this!

The colours rain

Stop hitting these guys... it's not them!

Rakesh!

It's Holi.

Hey... stop!

Run.

Run.

Run.

Vimmi!

- Are you crazy?! - Sorry, sorry.

Hey!

Ouch!

I'll break your bones if I fall, I'm telling you!

Happy Holi!

Help, help!

Get lost.

You scoundrel... give it to him!

Ms. Wonder Woman! Eye on the prize!

Okay, okay.

I've got some colours waiting in jail too.

Look carefully... was it them?

Don't know sir!

The guy I spoke to had colour all over their face.

What colour was it?

Sea green... Or was it Navy blue?

One tight slap... and you'll sing like a canary.

Was it them or not?

Sir... actually I had a bit to drink.

I can't remember clearly.

Get lost. Take him.

Get lost.

What were you doing there?

We were just chilling.

Why'd you run?

What's this?

Cannabis sir.

Keep it.

Right in front of us, two boys were attacked by 7-8 guys...

and then someone started running towards us!

We panicked, we thought we did something wrong.

We also started running.

What would you have done if you were in our place.

Pardon?

Say it in Hindi.

Sir... 8-10 of you attacked two boys.

And then some people started running towards us...

...we got scared and started running as well.

What would you have done if were in our place?

I'll do the questioning, not you.

She's not questioning you sir.

These boys you caught were drunk.

But if she had to question you, she would ask...

...are you going to arrest us and present us to the judge...

...because there is no proof... or charge!

Or are you gonna let us go, without any more harassment?

Don't teach me about the law... just because you read a post on Internet!

I don't know about all the laws... but we do know our rights.

Right or wrong... what if I just don't let you guys go?

That's up to you.

In exactly 20 minutes, you'll read a tweet...

...about how 2 engineering grads were attacked by the police at a fair.

And arrested on fake charges.

About how you detained a woman...

...without the presence of a single female cop!

The Tweet will tag a number of news channels,

the Director General of Police and the honourable Chief Minister!

What's a tweet?

Twitter sir.

They're a like notorious social media mailmen!

It can make or break governments!

Celebrities, politicians...

...they're are all using it sir!

Could I lose my job?

You'd surely get demoted sir!

Come.

- Thank you sir. - Thank you uncle.

- Happy holi. - Happy holi.

Bye, Son.

What're you doing?

Checking on Pappu... Let's not forget we still have a child.

Street smart, they could sell you the flag and all its stars

They're a conning Queen and its Czar

From Kanpur to Canada, they've sold it all, for every price...

Born hustlers, they got Eskimos buyin all their ice.

- Sir. - Sir.

How can you let them walk?

This makes no sense!

Bloody wanna-be Sherlocks...

...just because you're working for the police...

...doesn't give you a license to rain fire over the whole world.

This isn't a game... it's a responsibility...

You can't just grab the person you get hold off.

Next time you better come to me with solid proof...

...or I'll ship you back to your oblivious life!

How dare this Jatayu speak to us like that?!

And why'd you have to go all P. T. Usha on them?!

You're angry at Jatayu... don't take it out on me!

Sure... I'll take the blame - "It's all my fault".

You happy?

I'm sorry Rakesh!

It's the hot-headed Punjabi girl inside me...

You know, when I caught him... he was just 6 inches away from me.

I saw Bunty in his eyes!

I can spot a ticketless traveller inside a crowded train...

...just by look on their face!

I may not know the technology, but I know people all too well.

I'm dead sure... these two are the new Bunty and Babli.

And If I'm right, they'll pull off their next con pretty soon.

Cool. Then we'll catch them redhanded...

...and prove it to everyone... that we're still the original tricksters.

They made a big mistake showing us their faces.

Set it down here.

Make sure you count it.

Don't you worry.

She's counting it.

We're almost done.

Good.

First you got the whole village cleaned up...

...and now you've brought us all this food.

Are you from a political party?

We voted for that Mrs. Lovely thinking we'll see some progress...

...but the only time we see her all year is when she comes down...

...to collect donations for her own birthday party!

Thanks a ton my children. Thank you.

Come!

Mate, this is for you.

But you guys didn't make anything on this gig.

We did!

In goodwill... and In Karma...

These bags of karma keep us out of jail...

...if we're out, we can make all the money we want.

I want in on this karma too!

Love you guys!

Love you.

Love you.

So cute!

That was a close shave this time.

And they know our faces now.

I think we should lie low for sometime.

Darling, if we lie low now... they'll know we're definitely guilty.

We need to pull off another con soon... so we can fund your startup too!

Do you think the Income Tax department knows...

...about Mrs. Lovely's birthday donation drive?

Someone needs to tell them!

Okay.

INCOME TAX OFFICE

Mr. Nand Kishore - Income Tax Officer

Hello.

Am I speaking to the distinguished Income Tax officer - Mr. Nand Kishore?

You have the right number, go on.

I wanted to give you a tip... is this line secure?

Safer than a lamb in the jungle!

Sir... Mrs. Lovely... has amassed donations for her birthday...

...and that too in cash!

I was beaten black and blue just because I refused to donate.

I've heard you're a messiah to the poor.

Promise me you'll get her!

Stop crying. I'll see what I can do!

19...18 oh you are doing well... keep breathing...keep breathing.

Don't speak so much.

Very good, you keep going.

No, no... this way!

With your back arched, or the lower back takes all the strain...

and then you will just suffer from back pain.

Correct...correct.

Arch it. Ya?

- Feels better now? - Yes.

Very better.

You are so funny.

You are also ROFL.

You are also LOL.

Mrs. Lovely will learn what a Nand Kishore raid feels like!

Where are they going?

They're going raid Mrs. Lovely. It's gonna be huge.

When?

Tomorrow morning.

What is this?

You let them off the hook, but we didn't.

That girl has just honey trapped Nand Kishore - a senior Income Tax officer.

Rakesh has learnt that Nand Kishore is planning...

...a big raid at Mrs. Lovely's house.

And if she's hovering around him... then so should we.

Hang on!

Where to?

Your help with the investigation ends here.

Law enforcement aka Yours truly... will take it from here.

But we gave you this lead?!

You need us sir.

We know how this Bunty-Babli's twisted minds work.

I know you do.

Look now that you're both all decked up.

Why don't you grace this police station and stay here?

They could do with some entertainment.

While I raid Mrs. Lovely!

Are you in the mood for some Ice cream?

Only if it's in a waffle cone... with sprinkles on top.

Mrs. Lovely's

Hurry up... Seal the place!

Cut the phone lines. Check every thing.

You guys go upstairs. Check out those rooms!

Nobody leaves the house!

Where the hell are you guys going?

Stand back, this is a government operation.

Quick guys!

Hey!

What's this ruckus early in the morning?

Dhannu, who let these guys in?

They.. Um-

Who are you doofus? Wait till I get there!

Who the hell are you?!

You census registrars think you can just walk into anybody's house?

Leave now!

We're not here for the census... we're here for your black money!

Warrant.

Here's the search warrant!

Get it.

Ma'am.

I'm a politician idiot... you think I can read! Chop-chop.

It's a government directive. They're here for the Birthday donations.

INCOME TAX

There goes my birthday party!

Dhannu... I can't breathe Dhannu!

Ma'am...get some air.

Open up! We have a search warrant for this place!

Who in the lord's name are Bunty and Babli?!

Bunty Babli?

Yup, The ones who're going to loot this birthday... I mean public fund.

Hello Pattaya!

It's Jatayu!

Ya, whatever...

A top secret Income Tax raid is in progress... How can you...?

Hello Mr. Fund Kishore.

It's Nand Kishore.

Whatever...

Are these your guys?

Of course, they are.

Bunty and Babli could've infiltrated your ranks.

- Gupta... - Yes sir.

Search all of them.

What the hell?!

Hey!!

They messed with me... they deserve it!

Why's it so sticky Mr. Officer? Emptied the whole glue bottle?!

Sir, there's a huge mob of protestors outside...

What are our orders?

Boss, there's a mob of 300 plus outside...

...chanting "Down with the Police"!

Finally! Our loyalists won't spare you guys!

You've ruined our super-secret raid!

Hand me the walkie...

Code red... Code red.

Code red... Code red.

Roger that! We're on our way.

- Quick. - Yes sir.

Let's go.

We were expecting Bunty-Babli... not the bloody QRT!

QRT?

Quick Response Team.

Sir look at their guns.

No!! My birthday kitty!

Ma'am!

Expect your suspension orders by the end of the day.

Piss off Fund Kishor before I bite that finger off.

4 birds with a stone, huh?

More like none in hand, none in bush!

Careful there...

Overtake him.

Hey...

Think you own the road bugger?!

Sir you won't believe the raid I've pulled off.

Mrs. Lovely's gonna bleed tears tonight!

Just a minute sir!

Step on the gas buddy!

Hey, stop the car!

Stop it.

Where's the cash?

Half in this car and the other half in the QRT truck.

But where's the damn truck?

It was right behind all this while.

So where is it now?!

Sorry sir.

We got ambushed by a wedding party, and someone punctured our tyres.

Somehow we wrangled this ride.

Some jackass even stole my walkie talkie!

Keep your posture right.

28... 27.

Keep looking down.

26.

25.

A unit of the QRT should be on stand by...

This village is full of her loyalists...

...who will jump in to save her.

I want 2 walkie-talkies handy.

Set to a frequency of 2.483 Ghz.

One with the QRT commander and the other with me.

Code red... Code red.

Code red... Code red.

Roger that! We're on our way.

Quick.

- Cadets! - Yes Sir!

Stop staring at the party! Clear the damn road!

Please make way...

Someone stop them!

Who took my walkie?

And who the hell punctured the tyre?

They've got no match,

they're in the zone

Across the world, oh it's well known...

Bunty & Babli

Twice the swag,

and double the cross

They've got the sauce

Bunty & Babli!

Hey... you think you own the road?!

Of course not darling, it's all yours! Love you!

Shit!

INCOME TAX

Bunty-Babli!

What's the final figure?

2 Billion Rupees!

Rascals didn't even leave us loose change!

Looks like I'm the one who's gonna bleed tears!

They've got no match,

they're in the zone

Across the world, oh it's well known...

Bunty & Babli

Twice the swag,

and double the cross

They've got the sauce

Bunty & Babli

- Dude it's past the expiry date. - Sorry sir.

I've never been humiliated like this before.

Maybe I should just resign before they suspend me...

...and go back to herding goats.

Private Number

Hello!

Hello sir!

Who's this?

The ones you're hunting for everywhere.

Bunty and Babli!

We just called to apologize sir.

All we wanted was to take advantage of the mob.

So we could flick all the cash as QRT!

We had no idea, you were gonna join the party.

But don't worry, Sir.

Nand Kishore has taken full responsibility for the entire fiasco.

I don't care for your apology.

Take my advice... turn yourselves in.

Or I'm gonna put you away for so long...

...that both of you will be the last of your name!

Do you know why we chose the names Bunty & Babli?

Because they're the only famous con artists, who've never been caught.

And neither will we be. So forget about it sir...

...and sleep tight.

Mr. Bunty... Mrs. Babli...

These two amateurs just schooled you two!

And they almost got me rusticated!

Maybe, if you had taken us along...

Like that would've made a difference!

I was wrong to think you guys are cut out for this.

Gift wrap your little Pappu and go back to your shitty small town life.

You gentleman, go back to checking tickets.

And you ladies, go back to do whatever you were doing.

You guys are way past your prime...

...you're like an Aspirin that gives a headache... instead of curing one!

- Let's go. - Ok.

Sir, I know you're still 0 for 4, but that was too harsh?

I mean, what did they do wrong?

They were only leading their family lives in-

Gupta...

An old horse has to be flogged now and then if you want it to win the race.

They're Bunty-Babli for god's sake!

No one can even dream of the scams they've pulled off in their heydays.

Once they put their minds to it...

...they can take on anybody, let alone these two upstarts.

Till now they were doing this out of compulsion...

...now I've made it personal for them.

As far as the score goes... I still get my 4 birds.

You have my best wishes, sir.

We couldn't salvage an inch of respect... let alone saving our brand.

Enough is enough Rakesh...

Like they say in English... we need to "Up our game"!

Vimmi, the world is made up of two kinds of people...

One - the ones who are mere spectators, happy to just clap & cheer...

And two... those who not only play... but also change the rules of the game!

We need to stop being the 1st kind... and become the 2nd kind.

We need to change the game...

...and turn these two into spectators!

Make them dance to our tunes.

The original Bunty and Babli is coming back!

Cheers.

Have you ever seen this much money?

Not even in my dreams!

Man, it's making my head spin...

Rakesh, they've only ever stolen from thieves?

Their conscience must be clean.

True, but I'm sure they're having a hard time believing...

...all that money is theirs...

And when you lose belief, it starts playing games with your mind!

It's over!

It's time to bid farewell to Bunty and Babli.

We need a clean slate!

What do you mean?

We can fund my startup with this money...

...and still have enough for money for generations to come!

I read somewhere... there is always a right time to exit a con!

This is our 'right time'...

It's a neat idea...

...but there's a problem.

We need a plan that makes them come straight to us with their bags of cash!

Only then will Inspector Jatayu will believe us.

If we had all that money... what would be going on in our heads right now?

Cash payments above 200,000 are monitored...

...anonymous deposits are virtually impossible.

And buying a car or property, etc. could tip off the Income Tax guys.

Then let's put the money in this app?

But how we gonna fund it babe?

Hire people... pay salaries, etc?

Paying in cash is a huge risk.

They'll have to launder this money to be able to use it from a bank account.

I got an idea!

An old school con...

They're good at playing this sophisticated game...

if we have to catch them, we need to bring them down to our level!

How are we going to launder all of this money?

There's got to be a way.

Let's put this money away for the time being...

...and take a nice, long holiday.

We can find a solution after we come back.

Now?

You're not going to lose flab in one day!

Have this protein shake.

This flab is a gift of the happy and peaceful married life you've given me!

Wait till you see the original Bunty.

They're not gonna know what hit them.

That is a fine piece of work!

Damn right.

Now let's party!

Oh yeah.

Love you!

Two lonely hearts.

Footlose and free.

Let's go on a spree.

Gotta do it now, anyhow!

My heart's a tinderbox.

Your mind... the matchbox.

Abuzz... ablaze and carefree.

Gotta make it now, anyhow!

So hold me tight.

We only got tonight.

All I wanna do, my baby blue...

is coochie coo. With you.

Love you... love you.

My heart's the field of gold.

You're the farmer too.

Love you... love you.

Imma spend every dime...

every Saturday on you.

Love you... love you.

I wanna be the gloss...

on your lips... girl, it's true!

Love you... love you.

I wanna be the house.

You come runnin home to!

GURDWARA. GURU NANAK DARBAR

Greetings uncle!

Greetings.

You two... after all these years.

Everything alright?

Yes.

CHANGEZI RESTAURANT

Hey, Senor Mehmood!

Bunty-Babli!

You guys are all over the news!

Where you been all this time?

Good look, huh.

- This is empty. - This one too.

Only for now.

Just imagine our cut for helping the government find its 2 Billion rupees!

So much cash it'll pop out of these zips!

I got you and you got me.

This ain't a game for three.

Yo paparazzi! Just let us be.

Gotta do it now, Anyhow!

World ain't worth a dirty dime.

It's got no reason, or no rhyme.

But don't you ever be cross with me.

Gonna make it now, Anyhow!

Sing a song with me, swe-pea...

on Youtube... for everyone to see.

All I wanna do, my baby blue...

is coochie coo. With you.

Love you... love you.

My heart's the field of gold.

You're the farmer too.

Love you... love you.

Imma spend every dime...

every Saturday on you.

Love you... love you.

I wanna be the gloss...

on your lips... girl, it's true!

Love you... love you.

I wanna be the house.

You come runnin home to!

POKER CLUB

Look Pappu... all your favourite things!

Burger, French fries, Chowmein...

and your lemonade!

What do you want mom?

I've heard you can find anyone on the web...

Can you find them?

Don't need no candle light.

I'll light up that moon for you.

On my rooftop, I wanna hear you.

Sayin... I Love you.

Don't be shy, my baby blue.

lemme hear you...

say... love you. My baby blue.

I love you. My baby blue.

Say it.

Sing it.

My name... I just wanna.

Hear you say.

All I wanna do, my baby blue...

is coochie coo. With you.

Love you... love you.

My heart's the field of gold.

You're the farmer too.

Love you... love you.

Imma spend every dime...

every Saturday on you.

Love you... love you.

I wanna be the gloss...

on your lips... girl, it's true!

Love you... love you.

I wanna be the house.

You come runnin home to!

Love you.

Resort done... Beach done... Church done...

Let's go to that lighthouse!

Uncle, are you crazy?

Oh my God!

Oh my God!

I am sorry... so sorry.

I'm scared.

I need to get somewhere urgently and my car broke down!

So you'll just stand in the middle of the road?

Baby calm down.

Sorry, please I need a lift... it's close by.

I am Briganza, how do you do?

Hello ma'am! hello! Please help me?

Please, please help...

Thank you.

Dear Lord!

Sorry, sorry.

Just a sec... Lemme get that!

I'm done.

I'm sorry. Relax.

Over to you Uncle.

EMPIRE PRINTING PRESS

Yes, yes!

Where's he going?

Thank you!

Strange place, no?

And an even stranger man...

That's coz he's carrying a bag full of cash...

- Cash? - Cash.

Greetings, Uncle.

Greetings, my son.

Hand it over.

The plot thickens!

Thank you.

He's here.

Oh my God! What happened to the car?

The tyre's punctured... Won't be too long.

I'm so sorry to have caused so much trouble to you guys.

Nothing like that! Just some car trouble...

I'm not letting you two leave without a drink... I'm buying, I insist.

No sir, we're very tired.

You guys helped me out in a jam.

How can I leave you high and dry? C'mon, I insist.

You guys wouldn't have helped me if I wasn't acting that crazy!

- Sir. - Come on.

I was meeting someone to launder my money... abroad.

But isn't that risky to send all that money out of the country?

Black money goes out... and white money comes back in.

India's money should stay in India! So nice thing, no?

I knew you could send your money out...

...but bringing it back in, doesn't sound right to me?

Lemme explain.

I get a 10 rupee note in exchange for the cash I deposit here.

The number on this note is the code...

...which my man abroad will show to collect the money.

The money laundering laws in these tax havens are pretty lenient.

All you need a bank employee...

...who'll let you deposit this money in your bank account!

COLOSSAL BANK LLP

What if we want to use this service?

This is a super secret network, run by a dangerous man called Bhuller.

You need a code to become a part of this network.

- Sir there must be some way. - Yes sir, please!

Take the phone number.

They'll ask you for a code...

but you wont have one!

No worries. You can try.

INTERNET CALLING

It's ringing.

Hello.

Code and password?

Actually, I don't have one but I was hoping that...

They cut it. Let's try again.

INTERNET CALLING

Code and password...

I don't have a code... But I've cash more than what Bhuller can handle.

Drat!

Let's talk to the printing press uncle.

Hello.

Kill it, uncle!

Yes, alright... No problem.

How much longer do we follow him?

Let's see where the old man is going.

You've been following me for the last 3 hours now...

...what do you want my child?

God is great.

I'm just a courier my child...

I hide their cash in wedding cards and smuggle it into Delhi...

I don't know what happens to the money after that.

It's not that easy to meet Mr. Bhuller.

Nothing comes easy in the world does it?

But things can be made easier by paying the right price.

What's your price?

2 million!

Sigh... you'll go back home tomorrow.

I couldn't even take you out for a film or shopping!

Like you could afford to take me out shopping?!

My pocket money is way more than yours!

Is it?

Is that good enough for you?

I won it at online poker.

Wow.

What if it's you Mom? I can already see her shoe flying at me!

You want sugar?

No sweety... I'm diabetic.

Rinku, I'll see you later.

- Bye, bye. - Bye.

- Bye, bye. - Bye, bye.

Where are they?

Mom and dad?

I won't be looking for Nirav Modi in your godforsaken town, would I?

I'll tell you... but what do I get in return?

Name your price.

Dad's promised me a mountain bike if I score 90% in my exams.

So?

The thing is he can only get me a bicycle.

Right?

But I want a motorbike!

I even have the extra 50,000 to buy it...

But I'm not really gonna score 90%...

...unless I get question papers beforehand.

And a cop can make that happen easily, right?

Think about it, no pressure.

I'm thinking I'm gonna give your parents a standing ovation...

...for the great achievement of raising a talent like you!

Correct.

- So it's a deal? - Come here.

Deal.

Listen carefully.

You need to report everything you hear, to me.

You're now a special agent of the police - Agent 007 Pappu!

Agent 007 Pappu!

Snap out of it... where are your parents?

- Sir, Abu Dhabi! - Abu Dhabi!

Bhuller-Bhuller...

This is Bobby Bhuller... you know my game

India to Abu Dhabi, they know my name

Man I am dripping with gold

My veins got ice,

but I'm hot and never nice

Remember my name

I'm the bank, I am the cash store

When I rain, it always pours!

I delete all my foes

Bhuller keeps changing his location.

I've heard he's in Abu Dhabi these days...

...at the Emirates Palace Hotel, where he conducts his meetings...

...and then lunch with French champagne and Beluga Caviar.

Sorry sir! Someone ordered all our Beluga caviar.

Someone.

- Who? - Them.

Baby, he's coming this way.

Start eating the caviar...

What's the point?

Let's just tell him we want to launder our money?

He is the Pablo Escobar of this place and we need to get his attention!

I want everything, the food is delicious.

It's lovely.

The chef is good... I want to give him something.

Indian?

No, I am Emirati. My girlfriend, she Indian. Any problem?

Jasmine. You can call me J.

I've heard you are starving.

Pardon?

That caviar belongs to me.

This one?

Well right now it is on our table so it belongs to the table.

You can join us if you want... we don't mind.

Oops.

Ye, what the fish... I am telling you this man is a crazy!

This caviar cost 20 thousand Dirhams.

It's ok baby... it's fine.

Ok... I don't want to fight... I don't want to fight.

Baby calm me down.

Take my hand, calm me down. Calm me down.

No fight, no fight you are guest in my country so I'll behave.

You better calm down...

...because no one can take what belongs to Bhuller.

Be it Bhuller's cash...

...or Bhuller's caviar!

Waiter, put that on my tab.

Man, is this guy hot headed or what?!

Don't break character... he could turn around.

Seems I did great!

I'm the girl in your dream, I'm the queen

We're inseparable... no one gets in between

A bit of Bubbly - an expert con and a beauty

She plays dirty, cause her name is Cutie!

Mr. Bhuller's wife - Cutie Bhuller.

She loves horses, but she loves winning even more.

Ready for auction!

Here we go.

One, two, three!

Next one up for auction is thorough bred 'Thunder'.

Reserve price is 50,000 Dirham with an increment of 5000.

Lovely.

55,000 once... 55000 twice...

60.

We have another enthusiast.

60.

60,000 once...

here we go! 65.

Hey 70 - 80,000 incredible!

80... very good 90

95,000.

A 100,000.

Unbelievable!

Bunty control the missus, before there's a storm in the desert!

Tread lightly love...

...we'll be out in the streets if we have to pay!

135,000 once...

140!!!

Vimmi, if this goes south, they'll even take Pappu away from us!

140,000 once... 140,000... 145!

Unbelievable! Oh my God!!!

150,000.

150,000 once... 150,000 twice...

Let's go.

150,000 thrice!

ABU DHABI EQUESTRIAN CLUB

Congratulations to the young man!

When is the idiot going to show up.

He will.

He's here.

Ready?

- Sorry. - Yes.

I took all your caviar the other day.

I sincerely apologies.

Please accept this humble gift.

I gift you this beautiful horse.

Abdul?

Actually at 150,000 Dirham, this horse is too cheap for me.

I think it suits you better. Keep it.

Driver, drive!

What did you do?

What?

This was our chance to reel them in!

Calm down Rakesh.

Sweety there's no honey trap... if we ain't got any honey!

We need money to pull this off...

...that horse was worth at least a 150,000!

We've already spent half of what Uncle took from them... in the last 4 days!

Take a chill-pill Rakesh.

And don't forget this is Bhuller they are trying to woo...

...not some street-level thug.

Let them struggle...

...soon they won't be giving us this 200,000... but the entire 2 billion!

There's whack jobs... and there's WHACK JOBS!

Which ones are these?

I can't even.

Baby, if you're all done, can I try?

Of course... the times - they are a changin'!

But what you gonna do?

Indian or Emirati. There's only one weakness men have.

We will be making an investment in downtown.

- You get my files. - Of course.

What?

I'm paying you 500 Dirhams a day. Order your own food.

This is mine.

Rakesh, listen.

Yes, my queen?

We've waited all morning. Maybe they won't show up today.

Right. It's a wrap for today.

At least we'll save on this loose change expenses.

C'mon then... chop-chop. Off you go.

It's time to get my money's worth.

Pappu, I promise I'll bring you along next time.

Rakesh, my man... this is the life!

Attagirl!

There's a sight you don't see in my hometown.

Nothing could be harder,

Blast from the 4x4 dancefloor,

Ever rising, awesome like parkour,

Jumping... its so easy, my art form!

Can't believe they'd stoop this low!

She's headed right here!

Rakesh, you moron... get out of there!

Play it cool Rakesh.

Swag on!

Where the hell is she going?

Mister Bhuller... right?

Rakesh, you rascal!

Who's asking?

Wow! You're from India too?

I've got some sunburn here... but I can't reach it.

Can you please put this lotion on me?

Thank you!

If I do this, a shoe will definitely fly into my face!

It's worth it!

Lotion!

Vimmi this brand might cost you your husband!!!

Move aside you lifeguard... how does this work?!

Yaaaa!

You have such a nice touch...

...and you're hands are so strong Mr. Bhuller.

These hands have only been checking tickets for 15 years...

...maybe it was all for this day.

I think I've seen you before.

That's right.

At the restaurant - the caviar... and then at stud auction.

Yes.

But you still showed so much maturity.

I don't know maybe that's why I like older men.

Like older man!!

Be careful!

Where are you lost?

The lotion's all done.

I have to go now.

Out of my way!

Watch out!

What the hell.

Okay bye.

Rakesh, you stupid oaf!

Man, I'm in some serious trouble!

She had sprained her back Vimmi.

I was putting the ointment on her back!

I know she's a woman... but we are all humans first!

Stop trying to con me Rakesh!

I'm not like the village belles of your small town.

I'm the Iron Lady of Uttar Pradesh!

I can't believe I've left my kid alone for your shenanigans.

My shenanigans?!

Yes, yours!

And if you get on my nerves, I'm gonna take Pappu and leave you!

Then you can dye your own hair and wash your own underwear!

No more 'behind the scenes'.

I'm gonna be with you, wherever you go!

Lemme see how human you are after all.

- Excuse me, Miss? - Yes sir.

How much is buffet?

It's 233 Dirhams per person plus tax!

Okay, for two people.

Ya, you can sit anywhere.

- Thank you. - Welcome.

Yes.

Bobby!

- Hi. - Hi.

What fresh hell is this?

You are here.

And I was looking for you on the sea front!

Uff... Nice suit.

Thanks.

God I have such a thing for men in suits.

Nice... come lets have breakfast.

Come, don't be so so shy... come.

Come sit.

You know my boyfriend also wanted to apologies,

he has been feeling so bad.

He's a little jealous... but who wouldn't be?

I mean we hit it off straight away, right?

Right.

- Is your boyfriend Emirati? - Yes.

- And you're Indian? - Yes.

How come?

Oh my god, it's really funny story!

I was born in Ludhiana... studied in London.

We met at Harrods one day. Oh my God, its love at first site.

He was like..."babe you are mine..." - I said okay.

That's all it took?

That's all it takes these days you know.

What?

- Hi, meet my- - I know who she is.

Hi.

- And she is- - Snooty Bhuller.

Sorry?

Cutie Bhuller... why, what did you hear?

So cute! Please sit no?

It's so nice to meet you.

You are such a lucky woman to have him as your husband.

Women must be falling over each other to marry a man like him.

So handsome.

Morning, beautiful people...darling.

You know Bobby I was just talking about you.

Love it.

You look like my morning butter... wanna put you on bread and eat.

Sorry for the auction Sir... Ma'am.

No, no... it's okay.

You are so kind hearted bobby.

We are here on a short trip... we'll leave soon.

We would be really happy if you accept the beautiful horse.

Ya please you should... please, pretty please for me.

OKAY!

Okay.

Not okay!!!

Not okay?

What is this?! Do you know who I am?

I'm the Money laundering Queen - Cutie Bhuller!

I can move billions of dollars across continents with a single phone call.

It takes people a lifetime to even share a table with me...

...and you think you can just waltz in here?!

Get up!

You're making a scene Cutie.

Be quiet!

You think you're a bit stud?

Dude I from the Wild wild west of India.

You're new money, aren't you?

I can't see much of a pedigree here.

And you!

What's with this 'Bobby' nonsense?

Did nobody ever teach you any manners?

- Actually... - Shut it... or I'll shoot it!

Actually what?

You thinks we are your "bffs"?!

Don't you get too smart... or too familiar.

Bobby bloody Bhuller... It seems!

Fiery woman.

Yeah.

That's why I love her.

Let me rein her in a little.

Good day.

Good day! Ya, ya... you are the man. Go get her.

Oh man... things just got complicated.

No... it just got bloody simple.

Bhuller lady just gave away her identity.

We don't need these cons anymore...

...from now on, honesty is the best policy!

Well done baby. Let's go.

Vimmi-Vimmi, listen to me!

- Vimmi. - What is it?

What was that?!

Why'd you have to make a scene?

I was managing it!

What were you managing, Rakesh?

That chick's calling you 'Bobby' while your wife's sitting right next to you!

If you're done with me... with this marriage...

...just come out with it and tell me.

My god Vimmi, you've lost your mind... what are you saying?

I know what you're up.

You pretend like you care about our brand, but I know what's going on!

You went off script with your character so I changed our story.

Who says a man has to be the Kingpin...

...why can't there be a Queen-pin?!

You think I'm acting funny?

Why didn't you take the horse... like we'd planned to!

We could've got going then itself... But no!

You wanted to make things 'challenging'.

You didn't think they'll try something else?

Go ahead... be the Queen-pin!

Lemme see how you lead this con, I won't say a word.

Sure. I will lead... way better than you ever did!

- Oh I can't wait to see! - And see you will.

Men will always be men. Is the plan still on?

Why don't you go ask the Queen-pin?!

What's wrong with you?

Looks like the idiot just hit the fan!

Hi ma'am would you like to sample our new cocktail please?

Is it free?

Yes ma'am... It's a sample!

Gimme a dozen.

Keep 5-6.

Thank you ma'am, enjoy!

Free samples, huh.

I doubt it tastes anything like our drinks back home cutie ma'am.

One dressing down... and you've gone from Arab Cocktails to Indian drinks.

If I'd gone 'Indian' straight up,

...you would have thrown a slipper at my head.

To be honest, I think all this new money got to our heads.

We forgot our manners and our place.

Hope you can let bygones be bygones and forgive our childishness?

A child?

As compared to you two.

We tried hard to reach you via Bobby sir, but all in vain.

We thought we could trick you into helping us.

We need to launder about 2 Billion rupees...

...but we were worried you won't take us seriously.

This is our last try.

If you disapprove,

I swear we will never show our faces again.

Sorry for all the trouble... and thank you Ma'am!

I appreciate the honesty, what state are you from?

Uttar Pradesh Ma'am... In the north.

That makes us neighbours.

Let's meet for dinner tomorrow at my suite.

Get your baby too.

So... Is that a 'Yes'?

- Dinner. Tomorrow night. - Okay.

I don't feel like working right now.

I am working on my tan.

Can I just say, how perfect that tan is! Okay.

I'll see you at the party.

Thank you, ma'am.

Cheers.

My friends... this world has two kinds of people.

One - the kinds who walk a straight...

...honest path and sleep peacefully at night.

And Two - the kinds who take the crooked...

...twisted path and live as if every night is their last.

We belong to the second kind...

...and soon you guys will too.

So let's party like this literally is the last night of your free lives!

Like there's no tomorrow.

Well said!

You're going off track and headed for a crash.

Stop over acting. They are already sold.

Give me a minute Vimmi.

Vimmi?

Isn't her name Cutie? Cutie Bhuller?

No.

She's Vimmi, and I am Rakesh from Fursatganj, Uttar Pradesh.

It's the money laundering that made us Bobby and Cutie Bhuller.

Right Cutie?

Have you guys heard of Bunty and Babli?

No, who're they?

Legends... also from small town India. Like us.

So what?

All this money... we haven't earned it -

we ripped off a corrupt politician doing what we learnt from Bunty and Babli.

I bet that's what these real Bunty and Babli would've done!

Where is it now?

Who?

THAT.

Oh... the cash is safe back home.

We can get it where you say at 2 days notice.

Get the money to Delhi.

Done! Where in Delhi?

Bobby, where in Delhi?

Ma'am, your grace too.

Sure.

To our under construction building.

Cheers... once more, for 2 Billion!

Cheers!

2 Billion?

Just imagine!

I feel like you deserve a cut too.

What am I going to do with 2000?

At best I'll take the whole class for snacks... and turn into Mr. Popular!

You need to think big Pappu.

What then? 200,000?

Come on!

How much then?

You're the heir apparent boy...

...you deserve at least 20 million!

007. Always think big! How much?

20 million!

Pappu's 20 million!

20 bloody million!

I want 20 million... I'm the heir apparent!

Moron!

Okay... I'll make do with 2000 then.

- Do want 2000 slaps instead? - No mummy, I'm sorry!

It'll be a miracle if you pass your mid terms!

20 million slaps you'll get.

Yo, Mr. Bobby Bhuller... can we leave?

We have a train to catch! Hurry up!

DELHI - INDIA

Is this okay?

Yes!

They'll get here first... and then Jatayu will.

Till then we will have all the proof we need.

Except for one thing.

What?

I've seen you get fresh with that pretty young thing... these last few days.

Tell me straight up Rakesh, if our love is one-sided now.

Here I am trying to stay in shape... dolling up every day,

wearing Sabyasachi knock offs... these blow drys.

Make up and what not! Who do you think it's for?

Who do you think I paint these stars on my nails for?!

I can't believe we're still discussing this!?

I need an answer Rakesh!

Tell me, are you bored of me?!

Be honest. I won't feel bad.

Yes, I'm bored!

I'm bored with your constant unhappiness!

Do you remember the last time you smiled at me?

You know these cons are like a game of poker...

...you can't let on when you are bluffing, if you want to win.

All I did was stay in character Vimmi.

God knows I've never breached protocol in the last 15 years.

I may sway to a beat here there...

...but you're the only song in my heart Vimmi Trivedi!

Is that true? Swear on Pappu?

I swear... on Pappu, our railway colony and by every person in our entire town!

I am sorry!

What?

I said I'm sorry. Idiot.

Better get warmed up now.

We need to get our revenge before Jatayu Singh gets here.

Got the cash?

- It's in the car. - Show me the bags!

Load them in the car.

All your money will be transferred to a foreign bank account by tomorrow.

Thanks.

- Thank you sir. - You can go.

Kunal.

Get up my child.

Are you wondering why your whole world has just turned upside down?

I designed that Bunty and Babli calling card.

I selected the colour, it's scheme...

...and each and every detail like... what's it called?

- Font. - Yes, the font! I chose that.

And this name, Bunty and Babli, that you've been parading around...

...was the result of our brilliance.

You small time thugs thought you could replace us?!

You thought you could just mooch off our brand...

...by plastering it wherever you feel like?

Now we'll plaster your faces on tomorrow's papers.

Jatayu Singh will be here any moment.

You're looking at a minimum of 10 years.

Not to mention what Mrs. Lovely will do with you.

Get ready to rot in jail.

So you guys are the real Bunty and Babli?

Word.

Damn! We shouldn't have done this.

Wait, I'll handle this.

I knew we were going to get caught one day... if we keep doing it!

Lemme talk.

I should've never agreed to your stupid idea...

I should have just said 'No' to doing it one last time as well!

Just calm down Sonia.

You're asking me to calm down?!

I have a single mother dude.

How is she gonna live without me?!

Stop this fake drama.

We have used this same sad story many time!

We don't do this because we enjoy it.

Anybody who breaks the law, does it for a reason.

For some it's revenge, greed, or ambition.

Ours, was frustration.

India runs on a special fuel... that's unique only to us -

we call it 'Jugaad' or cutting corners.

Dad couldn't afford a private hospital for my birth.

He first needed 'Jugaad' for a hospital bed in a government hospital.

And then for admission in an English medium school

for a special tutor.

Jugaad to get me into the local Cricket team...

...he used this jugaad to even get me internet on my phone!

I saw him cut corners all his life...

...and grew up thinking.

Maybe this is the only way - Jugaad!

This same jugaad got me to an engineering college...

...but even there I couldn't get by a single day without cutting corners.

In spite of hundreds of thousands in fees and tall claims of "job security".

Not even 20% of the graduates get a job.

And then some survey will declare that...

90% of graduates are unfit for employment!

But does anyone stop to ask why is that so?

And why doesn't it change?

My graduation had wiped out my parents' savings.

I didn't know what to do.

When it occurred to me if the system is designed to steal from us...

...why not con the system itself?

And that's why we decided we're going to con agents of this 'jugaad'

and expose the system for what it is...

...and in the process, fulfil our own dreams.

Tell me what exactly did we do wrong?

We grew up listening Bunty and Babli's exploits... on TV and newspapers.

As soon as we graduated, you became our role models.

We thought, like you guys, we too will never get caught.

We only keep 10% of the money we make... and give away the rest.

We forgot that our misdeeds are bound to catch up with us one day.

So here we are... and our money.

You can do what you want with us.

Vimmi, the world is made up of two kinds of people.

One - The kinds who sidestep a pothole on the road and move on with their life.

Two - The kind that stops... and asks who did this?

For what joy? And when will it be filled?

And there's a third kind... people like you, who can see the pothole...

...and yet feel the urge to fall into it!

Stop being such a softie Rakesh.

Didn't we also get cheated by the same system?

That's why we became Bunty and Babli.

I believe if they are repentant, they should get a chance to make amends.

Isn't that the same thing Inspector Dashrath Singh did for us?

Remember Vimmi?

You know I get emotional when you talk about Dashrath uncle.

What the hell is this? Where are those two?

Sir they fooled us and fled!

But we've recovered the money... the entire 2 Billion.

It's in that van.

They fooled you and fled... but left all their money behind?

Can you explain that rubbish logic?

As soon as they heard Jatayu Singh is coming...

they started shivering in their pants and scampered away!

Vimmi dear... that's a great story for stoking my ego...

but as far as logic goes... that is complete poppycock!

You can go ahead and check the van.

Incredible! Flabbergasting... Mind blasting!!!

Katrina, Priyanka, Bipasha has replaced Gandhi on the notes!

These notes look fake.

Dear Former Bunty, they don't just look fake, they are fake!

They've fooled us again!

But I checked the 3 bags myself...

I told you... You've gone soft.

If you can fool them for 30 days by thinking like them...

...then why can't they do the same to you and fool you with 3 bags?

There's real currency on the surface...

...but the bags are full of fake notes.

I know Gupta.

What about the video recording?

I deleted the video after we let them go.

What could we do?

We thought they were repentant...

...and wanted to give them a chance to make amends.

Are you a court judge?

Or the police?

Who gave you the goddamn right to decide?

Tell, me who gave you the right?

Um... Even Dashrath Singh...

Not a word. He's retired now.

The phone's ringing.

UNKNOWN NUMBER

Who is it?

Greetings Mr. Bunty... and Mrs. Babli

Just tell me where you are, you rascal?

If I see you I am going to make sure you won't be able to greet anyone again!

I know you guys are pissed about the fake notes, but think about it.

How could we pass on the chance to scam the real Bunty and Babli?!

You're telling me, you knew we were the real Bunty and Babli, all along?

When you took your wallet out on the night of the party.

I saw something I wasn't meant to.

You can't handle your drink.

It was nice to see you still carry your calling card even after all these years.

And that hour long rant about Jugaad and the system... was all a farce?

No. We did get a little too greedy and selfish about our aspirations,

when we landed this kind of money.

But then we recollected the reason that inspired us to become Bunty and Babli.

And so, in the interest of the general public, we're re-entering the game.

There's no point coming after us...

...because we ain't getting caught again!

So don't waste your time.

- Take care and sleep tight! - Take care.

Bunty and Babli... Bunty and Babli..!

You have once again besmirched your own good name...as well as mine.

I was wrong... you guys are useless!

Please return to your domestic life...

...and look after that ticking time bomb of a child that you've birthed.

I'm afraid his antics are going to leave both of you behind.

Out!

- Gupta. - Sir.

Leave them.

ONE WEEK LATER

- Rakesh!!! - "Why... and How?!"

That is the question everyone's asking.

Rakesh! Come fast.

"Orphanages across the country have received...

...a mamoth deposit totalling 1.8 Billion rupees.

From none other than the master fraudsters - Bunty and Babli!

This money was transferred from an account registered in Abu Dhabu...

...under their name - Bunty-Babli and Co.

- No one knows why..." - There's a courier for you.

Did you open the envelope Pappu?

Tickets to Abu Dhabi.

Greeting again... Mr. Bunty and Mrs. Babli!

Your plan was outstanding!

If we hand this money to Jatayu,

it's going to land up in some minister's safe...

...or some business tycoon's going to use it...

...to defraud the people and run away.

5% brand licensing fees with perpetuity, is that too much?

Perpetu... What?

Perpetuity...

They pay us, as long as they use the brand.

The police are on their way... you have two options right now.

Option A, surrender and repent.

Or option B, do as we say.

Whatever you do, just remember one thing...

...there hasn't been a day in the last few years...

...when we haven't regretted giving up being Bunty and Babli.

Mehmood, doesn't your son own a printing press in Delhi?

We need 40 kilos of recycled paper and 5 kilos of Monopoly notes.

Wait! If we con you, then we ought to have known all along...

...that you are the real Bunty and Babli!

That's right.

Why else would we carry fake currency notes?

You'll say that you saw this calling card in my wallet...

...on the night of the party.

Working with you guys was a joy!

We've transferred your 5% to your account...

...and mailed the account number to Vimmi's email id.

I hope you guys liked our company name?

Would have been nicer if you called it.

"The original Bunty-Babli and company"!

That is that! What's next for you guys?

Didn't you guys say, not a single passes...

...when you don't regret giving up 'Bunty and Babli'.

We don't want that feeling.

So we're going to keep doing this.

The world has seen Bunty and Babli 2.0.

What do you guys think about a Bunty and Babli 4.0?

Loan frauds in the Indian banking system have become a menace...

...and the employees in-charge are responsible for a bulk of it.

HBC - Hindustan Banking Corporation. Raman Kochhar - Managing Director

Your consortium has been awarded the contract to build the highway,

but you guys have no experience in road construction.

This could be a risky proposition for our bank.

I mean, if you don't complete this project,

we will have to bear the loss.

Who decides if this loan is risky or not?

That would be me!

So, the approval of this loan depends solely on you?

Yes. That's right.

So if your wife gets a stake of 10% in our company...

...will it make your decision a whole lot easier?

20%, not 10.

From ministers right up to the clerks...

...there are a lot of palms that need to be greased.

Well sir...

It takes money to make money.

Done.

Tattooed.

Tattooed.

Tattooed.

I stalk your insta and your selfies.

I lose my heart, when you 'say cheese'.

You're the only party, only government...

To my heart's lonely parliament.

Take ma house, take all ma dough,

You can have da jaguar and da bungalow.

Just once girl... look at me right?

Your black eyes, shoot me at sight.

Why you gotta be so mean?

Tattooed girl... my beauty queen.

Tattooed girl... your eyes so green.

Tattooed girl... my beauty queen.

Tattooed girl... with eyes so green.

Girl... hey girl... Hey tattooed girl.

Dancin to the desi beat.

In that Spaghetti-n-jeans,

lookin oh so sweet.

My tattooed girl... yeah-yeah.

Dancin to the desi beat.

In that Spaghetti-n-jeans,

lookin oh so sweet.

My tattooed girl.

Listen up.

I'm a big movie star boy.

Don't you got newspapers in your car boy?

Just ma hair and ma make up.

Costs more than your jaguar boy!

Keep away your trashy pick up line.

Get a shave... a haircut and some shine.

Your Jag's a broken old truck...

...these fake raybans... don't make you fine!

Tattooed girl... ain't comin with you.

Tattooed girl... needs someone new!

Tattooed girl... my beauty queen.

Tattooed girl... with eyes so green.

Girl... hey girl... Hey tattooed girl.

Get lost.

Tattooed girl...

Tattooed girl...

Tattooed girl...

They thought they could fool me, just because I was a fan.

Watch as I hang them upside down and suck the life out of them.

Agent 007.

Yes sir.

Forget about the motorbike, you deserve a car.

Which I'll gift you.

Because you have chosen nation over your own parents Patriot Pappu.

Your nation salutes you!

Sir!