All language subtitles for Mr.Birthday..800MB.x264-GalaxyRG

Provided by explosiveskull
https://twitter.com/kaboomskull

Hmm...

Something different
about you today.

You did something
with your hair?

Those new pajamas?

Feet look bigger.

You look taller.

What is it?

Huh.

It's your birthday.

The big 1-2.

Happy birthday, kiddo.

Wow, you look older,
you look wiser.

Thank you, dad.

That's a fast 12 years.

Alright, why don't you go
get ready for school,

and then you can help me
with the decorations

for your party.

I can't wait for my party.

We're doing it, captain.

Oh!

Look at how I tied that one now.

Oh, oh, ew.

Yeah.

So, well,
I talked to your teacher

and he talked to all parents

and there are no allergies,
so you feel free

to pass these bad boys out
at recess.

Are you sure?

I mean,
I hardly know these kids.

Well, I know
that you're the new kid,

but cupcakes are the fast track
to friendship.

Plus, they all RSVPed
to your party already,

so they're coming, you know,
sounds like friendship to me.

I know.

Alright, it's time to boogie,
birthday girl.

Alright? Before the bus comes.

Thanks for everything.

The place looks great, dad.

I can't wait for later.

You're welcome.

Yeah, well, you know what
we have time for though?

Oh, no, the bear got out.

Ah, good morning, Mr. Jay.

Salutations, Barry, my boy.

Well, just as you'd like it
two creams.

Ooh, perfect.

And uh, a few sugars
we won't mention.

Oh, I know you better
than that.

Alright, well,
here's today's paper as well.

You don't happen to have
tomorrow's, do you?

Huh?

Oh.

How dare you?

- It's perfect.
- Oh.

You always go the extra mile
to take such good care of us.

Commendable, my boy,
commendable!

I always say try your best
and you'll be your best.

Enjoy this fine, fine morning,
Bartholomew.

Enjoy your walk, Mr. Jay.

Ms. Ashcroft, good morning!

Ah, Pepper, hi.

I got any packages?

Let me check.

Um, no, no,
it's not looking like it.

That's funny,
I'm expecting something.

Well, I will keep my eye out
for you.

- Mhmm.
- And also, Ms. Ashcroft, um,

we have to keep Pepper
on a leash.

Look, I'm sorry.
It's a building policy.

Yeah, next time.

Oops.

When you gotta go,
you gotta go, right?

I'll clean it up.

Let me know about that package.

Will do.

Phew.

An accident?

Uh, yeah, well, it appears that Ms.
Ashcroft's dog,

Pepper, um, had too much coffee.

See you later, pal.

Oh, by the way,
you haven't seen

that little Miss Fix It
around here, have you?

Huh?

The uh, the maintenance guy.

He's not exactly
a maintenance guy.

That's Jess.

Terrific.

Have you seen her?

Nope.

But if you needed some help
with something,

I'm glad to do it.

If your air conditioning
is broken, I can fix it.

Thank you. No, I wanted...

I wanted to introduce myself
to the young lady.

Yeah, yeah, I can't help you
with that.

Okay.

You missed a spot.

Oh, thanks, Rick.

I'm your friend.

Yes, you are.

Yeah. Watch your step, yeah.
Watch your step.

Hi, Bianca.

What happened here?

Well, Ms. Ashcroft's dog,
Pepper,

apparently couldn't hold it.

Well, I'm glad to see

you're on top of these things,
Barry,

'cause corporate's
been hinting at an inspection.

So I need this place to look
spotless at all times.

You understand?

Especially, the lobby,

'cause it's the first place
they walk in and we always...

Always make
a good first impression.

You know, you have it
pretty good here, Barry.

Yep.

Flexible hours,
a short commute.

And let's face it,
you get to live in a building

that you could never afford
to live in.

So many perks to this job.

Well, that's why I plan
on working really hard

at keeping the job.

That's great.

Uh-uh. No, no.

Come on. Come on. Come on.

Surprise.

Got you a coffee.

Oh, well, thank you very much.

Perfect timing,
we just ran out.

Oh well, just a little thank you
for showing me the ropes.

It's not exactly easy
being the new girl.

Yeah, well, my daughter
is the new girl in the school,

so I totally get it.

Well, she's really lucky
to have a cool dad like you

to help her through it.

I don't know about cool,

but we're definitely
making it through.

Uh, today's her birthday.

Aww.

Well, to the birthday new girl.

To the birthday new girl.

So, um...

Where do you like to go
when you go out around here?

I'm still kind of exploring.

Uh, uh...

Um, well, to tell you the truth,

um, other than the little market
around the corner,

I don't think I've been out
since I've been here.

- What?
- Yeah.

Well, uh, we definitely need
to change that.

You think so?

I'm gonna go try out
that new deli tomorrow night.

You should totally come
with me.

Uh, look, I would love to,
but I can't.

It's... it's Emily.

Oh.

No, my daughter, Emily.

It... it's a little thing
we do every week.

It's a little
father-daughter thing.

It's kind of... Taco Tuesdays.

Totally get it.

Barry, Mrs.
Bettencourt needs help with the groceries

in the garage. ASAP.

Copy that, Bianca.
I'll be right there.

Thank you for the coffee.

I'm coming.

They're for everyone.
Feel free.

- Wow, love the frosting.
- Thanks.

Me and my dad made them.

Hmm, in that case,

I can't wait to try the cake
later.

- You're coming?
- Yep.

My mom said I could leave
my piano lessons early.

Oh, hey, birthday girl.

- Do you want a cupcake?
- No, thanks.

This dress was really expensive

and I don't wanna get
anything on it.

How about you two?

They're really good.

It's really cute that
you brought cupcakes though.

I remember I did that
for my birthday one time.

In kindergarten.

Never too old for cupcakes.

That's what I always say.

But thanks for the invite.

Oh, I saw you RSVPed,
I'm glad you can make it.

We wouldn't miss a chance
to welcome a new member

into the group.

Should be fun.

I got a lot of snacks and games,
and I have a piٌata.

That sounds amazing.

Alright, let's get back inside,
everyone!

It's mind mode in time!

Oohhoo.

You still got it.

Hey, birthday girl.

Well...

How did it go?

Great.

The cupcakes were a big hit.

Alex took three of them.

Awesome.

And I scored a goal in practice.

Of course, you scored a goal
in practice.

You know why?

Because you're a monster.

Well, in that case, I think
that's good cause for, uh,

an early birthday present.

I mean, I know you're supposed
to wait until you cut the cake

usually, but what do you say
we...

...bend the rules a little bit?

Yeah? You think so?

Hmm. Nah. I think it's better
to actually...

Oh, okay, well, oh well.

It's the one in the window.

Yeah, well, you know,

you wouldn't stop
talking about it every time

we went by the store,
so I figured, mmm,

what the heck.

It'd be a good party dress
for you.

Can I wear it tonight?

Of course.

Go put it on, your friends
are gonna be here soon.

I can't believe this dress
is actually mine.

Put it on.

Hmm.

Shouldn't they be here by now?

I don't... look, maybe
they're just fashionably late.

No, no,
they're not fashionably late.

They are definitely late.

They looked at me straight
in the eyes

and said they were coming.

Well, uh...

Things happen, you know.

Maybe they had a hard time
getting a ride or may...

maybe they got abducted
by aliens.

All of them?

Uh, kids are funny
when it comes

to adjusting to new people.

Alright?

You've only been here
a couple of weeks.

It's my fault.

It's bad timing, I'm sorry.

Yeah, but I don't get
why they lied.

That's what kids do when they
don't know what else to do.

But you know what?

It's not too late for us
to have some fun.

Alright? Let's enjoy this.

I'm not gonna let
a bunch of kids get us down.

You like cake, I think.

Oh, I know you like cake,
'cause you're my kid.

And I like cake.

So you must like cake.
Do you want some cake?

Yeah, I guess I like cake.

That's the spirit.

You like wishes too, right?

Who doesn't like wishes?

Well, then let's have some cake
and make some wishes, baby.

Okay, dad.

Happy Birthday, dear Emily,

happy birthday to you.

Woah, nice lung capacity.

What are you,
a trumpet player now?

Alright, it's time to do
the honors.

Come on, cut the cake.

Okay, wish time, right?

It's wish time.
Anything you want.

Alright, yeah.

First piece goes
to the birthday girl.

That must be Alex.

Oh, good.

We're gonna need some help
with that cake.

- Hey.
- Alex, my man.

Welcome to the party, pal.

Thanks, Mr. B.

- Happy birthday again.
- Thanks.

Sorry, I'm late.

Piano lessons took forever!

Hey, where is everyone?

It's okay, who needs 'em?

My real friend's here.

More cake for me.

And you get an H.

Look how lucky you are.

Yum.

- Ice cream?
- Duh.

I like this kid.

I like this kid. Alright.

Emily!

Emily!

Hey.

Hey, hey, hey, hey,
what's wrong?

What's going on?

This.

Hey, listen.
These kids are...

Uh, look...

Just let this be
a valuable life lesson.

What, that it stinks
to be the new kid?

No, it's way more important
than that.

Oh, yeah, what?

It's about...

When...

When it... when it...

When it comes to friendship,
it's way more about quality.

Not quantity.

You understand?

Yeah, but what am I supposed
to do about them?

You're supposed to ignore 'em.

That's what bullies do.

Yeah, bullies, they can't wait
to get a rise out of you.

I mean, nothing makes
them happier than seeing

the result of their actions.

And seeing how you respond
to it, right?

So the best thing
that you can do

is you just don't respond.

You just ignore them.

It drives them crazy.

And as soon as they realize
they can't get a rise

out of you,
they leave you alone.

Yeah, I guess that makes sense.

Yeah, it makes sense.

Hey, and also check this out.

Look, from what I can tell,
you and your friend,

your real friend, Alex,
had a great time tonight.

Yeah, I guess
that was pretty fun.

Yeah, it was fun.

Thanks for making me
feel better.

Look, I'm really, really proud
of you for toughing it out

through the rough patches.

It's all gonna get better soon,
I promise.

Yeah, it was actually
what I wished for.

Oh, don't tell me
what you wished for.

It won't come true.

Oh.

Would you look at that,
it's 12:01.

Another year gone by.

Thanks for everything, dad.

You're welcome.

Hey, I love you.

Happy birthday.

Boop.

Go to bed.

Happy birthday!

Emily, get out here,
it's an emergency.

What, what? What's wrong?

Well, uh...

You know how usually
on your birthday,

I give you an early present
and then... and then...

and then
I give you a late present.

This year, uh, I'm just...
I'm just so sorry.

I... I just couldn't help it.

An electric guitar!

Now we can really jam.

Hey, you stuck with it
on the acoustic and I told you,

if you worked hard, you'd get
an electric soon, so yeah.

Yeah!

Who puts a package there?

"To a deserving gentleman."

Hmm.

Must be made in Italy.

Hmm.

Well, hello there.

Oh.

Bianca.

Morning, Mr. Jay.

Late for work, gotta go.

Handsome chapeau, monsieur,
tre bien.

Bend those knees.

I'd race you,

but it would be embarrassing
for you.

Nice of you to join us, Barry.

Yeah, I'm so sorry.

Like, I... I got this
really random delivery

and I just...

You just thought you'd hold up
the entire staff meeting,

even though you literally live
six floors above our heads,

yet you somehow managed
to be late.

Yeah, like... like I said, guys,
I'm really sorry.

You're on very
thin ice and take off

that ridiculous hat.

Besides the fact
that it's horribly tacky,

we have a dress code
and I'd like you to follow it.

Will do.

I'm not gonna
sugarcoat this people,

the head honchos are coming in
from corporate

for the annual inspection,

but we don't know when.

But rest assured, they'll come.

So I need you to stay alert,
because it's quite simple.

If you let me down,
I'll let you go.

Okay?

Great.

Barry.

Quick question.

Yes, Rick.

If you're here...

...who's running
the chocolate factory?

Oh, that is a good one, Rick.

- That's good.
- Yeah.

Quite a statement, kid.

Say hi to the lollipop gang
for me.

The... that's...

It's a Lollipop Guild
and that's The Wizard of...

- I kinda like it.
- What?

- That hat.
- Huh?

It's you, it's very cool.

Oh, well.

- Check it out.
- Hmm?

Oh.

So you do have some moves.

Yeah, I do have some moves.

- Let me try this one.
- Uh-huh.

I'll probably screw it up,
but let's see.

Oh.

What?

That was very impressive.

You know, but, um,
I know a couple things, too.

I got a little something also.

Pah! Huh, huh?

Yeah, you do have some move.

We should form a team.

- We should.
- Yeah.

Alright, see you later.

Alright, I'll talk
to your people,

you talk to my people.

Good morning, Ms. Ashcroft.

Is there something
I can help you with?

And also, I would really like
to thank you for keeping

little Pepper here
on the leash.

We really appreciate that.

Well, before you thank me
too much,

I just want you to know

that he got loose
for a little while.

Oh, is he okay?

The dog's fine.

The alley, not so much.

He ripped up all the bags.

He made a real mess out there.

We'll take care of it.

You will?

Yeah, absolutely.

Pepper says he's very sorry.

Aren't you, Pepper?

Yes.

You have a good day.

How was school?

It was okay.

How's work been?

Uh, not too bad.

I got my last clean-up
of the day and then I'm finito.

I appreciate you hanging out
with me though.

Helps pass the time.

I like hanging out with you.

You're kind of a goof.

Hey.

Thanks, Pepper.

Do you need my help
with anything?

Uh, no, you sit this one out.

I'm going in.

Thanks.

Started 5:22.

This is Captain
Very Burdenedday,

at the USS Condo Elite.

I've been sent on a mission
to the garbage,

to wrangle their dreaded
intergalactic trash monster.

Stop, stop.

You stinky trash monster.

Oh, no, it's such
a stinky trash monster.

Oh, oh, never fear.

This garbage is no match
for my space sanitizer.

Sir, it seems to be working.

The... the... the... the...
the stench is eliminated.

And it smells so fresh
like clean cotton.

Alrighty.

Go do your homework.

I'll clock out
and meet you up there.

Bravo, Barry!

Bravo, my friend!

You had me worried there.

Those trash monsters
can be tricky.

Especially,
the wicked waste creature,

I hear he is the stinkiest.

Jeez. I had no idea
you were even there.

Well, I'm so glad I was.

I never knew that you were
this witty and imaginative.

Yeah, well, you know,
when you have a job

as monotonous as mine,
you know, some fun

it makes the day go by faster.

Well, it was very, very funny.

Well, I'm glad I could give you
a chuckle.

Have you ever thought
you may have missed

your calling out here
performing for the swill cans?

You have an innate ability
to share joy.

And that's in short supply
these days.

Well, I guess I have kind of
always been an entertainer.

And always loved theatre,
used to play the guitar

and write music.

You have the soul of an artist.

And... and so, then what?

Life.

You know, I started a family,
had to get a real job.

Oh, poo!

Poo!

Never call never by its name
and it'll never show up.

It's never too late to uh, make
a big change.

You know, redefine yourself,
switch gears!

Barry, get up here. Pronto.

I have some potential tenants
here.

Duty calls.

Barry, we need to find a way
to unleash your talent you know,

uh, to get you out there
where people can see you.

Come by my office.

Uh, pop in after work

and we can discuss
a possible career change.

Oh, look I...
I appreciate the offer, but I...

Barry,
I'm watching the street cameras

and you're not moving!

I'm coming.

You know, on second thought,
I'll see you tomorrow.

Excellent.

We have a great community here.

Uh, we have great art pieces.

We have three condos up there.

Uh, our lounge, our bar area
is over here.

Uh, as you can tell, we have
restaurants and coffee shops

and all kinds
of wonderful things

like that over here.

And, oh, you know,
what you're gonna like?

- Our spa.
- Yes.

Come check out the spa.

Bartholomew, my boy,
right on time.

Punctuality shows an appetite
for success.

The hat.

Barry, I happen to be
an excellent judge of character

and I see that you have a knack
with people.

No, I mean, the way that
you care for your daughter,

and the excellent job you do
around here,

the way you handle
that Gorgon of a boss,

you always have a smile
on your face

for everybody who comes
through the door.

Most people would get cranky
and hard-edged,

but not you, my boy, not you.

But just, you know,

trying to turn a negative
into a positive, you know.

I do.

I really do, Barry.

And that's why I think
the job I have in mind for you

is tailor made,
not to mention your name.

My name?

Bartholomew Barry Burtonday?

It's so close to birthday,
you never noticed that?

Sorry, I'm so confused.

Wha... what's the job?

Barry, welcome to my world.

I give you...

...the International
Birthday Network

or as we like to call it
"I.B.N."

Everybody, say hello to Barry.

Hi.

What... what do the people
at IBN do?

Hank, put down the donuts.

Warm up that VCR
and cue up the intro tape.

Intro tape?

My boy.

This way.

Follow me.

I'm so confused.

Finn, you shouldn't have
expected the chickens to come.

They don't trust you.

They think you wanna eat them.

Oh, hi.

We didn't see you come in.

Come on in, come on in,
you're always welcome.

That's you?

What?

For those of
you who haven't met...

Wow.

I'm Mr. Jay.

Well,
that's what my friends call me

so you should, too, always.

I'm the emperor
of birthday land.

Hi, your excellency.

No, no, Finn.

No titles, no titles.

There's a time and place
for everything.

This is my friend, Finn,
a little red Irish fox.

Well, top of the mornin' to ya.

Now I have a story about Finn.

Once upon a time,
it was Finn's birthday,

so his best friend Loopy,
the Wolf invited

all the other wolves,
and the foxes, and the coyotes,

and the coywolves over
for a big, big party.

But none of them showed.

Aww, poor little guy.

It's heartbreaking.

Loopy called us

the International
Birthday Network,

and we called all
the nicest animals

from all over the world.

From the London Zoo,
Charles the Cheetah.

No one should be ignored
on their birthday.

From the
Tallowmere Captain MaCaw.

From the Amazon,
Tallullah, the crocogator,

and from the continent
of Africa, Honey.

Honey?

Yes, that's his name.

Honey, the honey badger.

I thought I would come
and visit you

on your birthday.

I hope it's okay?

Oh, sure it is.

We'll all play some games
we will.

Do you have a birthday crisis
or emergency?

Call IBN.

We are a major
charitable organization

and we will create a unique
and exciting birthday party

for you.

For absolutely free.

On us!

Everyone, let's do
the birthday poem.

It's your birthday,
our favorite day,

we bet you know
what we will say.

Happy Birthday!

Oh!

I haven't had
a piece of cake yet.

Oh, Tallullah, there's yours.

Honey, have a nice big slice.

There you go, Charles.

Captain, I haven't forgot you,
Loopy,

and the birthday boy.

Well, this goes on
for several more hours.

But you get the gist, huh?

Isn't that fantastic?

Wonderful.

Uh, and I'll tell you
the inspiration for it.

The uh, origin story.

I am little Finn, the fox, yeah.

When I was a little shaver,

I got the royal chef
two years in a row.

My birthday came,
I got all excited.

I was waiting, you know,
for my party,

for clowns and ponies.

You know what I got?

Nothing.

Heartache.

Now, not one friend
came to wish me.

Well, on my day of days,
the candles were reflected

in my fat, salty tears,
running down my chubby face.

And that is when I decided
that no other little kid

would ever have to be sad
and lonely,

depressed and rejected,
on his, you know, special day.

We only get one, Barry.

One a year to celebrate
and be celebrated.

That is why I invented

the International
Birthday Network and that is why

I want you to take my spot.

Wait, wait, wait.

You want me to take your spot?

You know what, Barry,
I'll tell you something.

I'm not as young as I once was.

I can't load the wagon
like I used to.

And let me tell you something,
the truth is those stairs.

Those relentless,
punishing stairs.

Uh, so it seems like
a really unique and you know,

wonderful opportunity.

I mean, I... I really love
to help kids and all of that,

but the problem is
is that I work too much.

You know, whenever I'm off,
I have to be with Emily.

Well, take her with you,
they're birthday parties.

They're better with kids.

Okay, so, um...

- Hypothetically...
- Yeah.

What does something
like this pay?

Well, it's what I do
and I do okay.

Yes, you do.

I think you need a change.

So you keep your day job
for a while.

Simultaneously,
apprentice for me

and if everything goes well,
we'll talk numbers.

Huh?

What do you say?

You know what?

I'm in.

- Hey, can I ask you a question?
- Yeah, shoot.

What's with...
what's with the gloves?

- Oh, hot glue gun.
- Oh.

Yeah, heat blisters
from making puppets.

Don't wanna, you know,
gross out the kiddies.

Excellent.

Nice job.

So you're like a event planner?

No.

Well, yeah, I guess.

No, not really.

Look, you remember that wish
that you made?

I think it came true.

Really?

Yeah, things are about to change
and...

...we're about to bring
a lot of cheer

to a lot
of lonely birthday kids.

We? What's this we stuff?

Oh, I forgot to tell you,
you're coming with me.

I am?

Yeah, the more the merrier,

it's company policy
apparently.

Okay.

That will be a good
father-daughter bonding thing

and we get to give back.

I think it's a really,
really nice thing to do.

Oh, then it's official.

We're in the birthday business,
kid.

Let me see those power chords.

Ready? Go.

Nice.

Barry, Emily, I want you
to meet our team.

This is my dear friend,
Michelle.

She was the assistant
superintendent

of public schools around here
for years and years.

And she has contacts
with every social worker

and school psychiatrist.

She's overqualified to throw
a perfect birthday party.

That is Rita, my high school
drama best friend.

She was something
in Much Ado About Nothing.

She's our office manager
and she keeps things going

like clockwork around here.

Ooh.

Ink jam, happens all the time.

And of course, this is Hank,

my sister's oldest
and is true with most things.

The less said the better.

I wish I could help you,

but I'm not
a very mechanical guy.

If you wanted
a defense attorney,

then I can give you
a couple of hands.

You know, I think I'm good,

but I will definitely
think about it.

No biggie.

I was on my way back
from the gym,

thought I stop by and say hi.

Right on.
Way to get that workout in.

No biggie, it's a lifestyle.

You know, I do tris, bis

on Mondays and Wednesdays
and legs and chest

on Thursdays and Saturdays.

- Nice glutes there, Bell, yeah.
- Thanks, pal.

Hey, Barry.

Hi, we... we got a little
heater problem going on here?

Uh, yeah.

I think it's the battery

and if I don't fix it
before the inspector comes,

Bianca is going to flip.

Uh, you know what, I think
I had the exact same thing

happen to me
a couple of months ago.

I think I know exactly
what to do, alright?

You fixed it.

That was magical.

Well, I'm gonna take
a little cool down jog.

See if I can beat
this lactic acid build-up.

You fight that acid, pal.

Hey, you hungry?

Huh?

Do you wanna go get some pizza?

I punch out at 5:00
and I am starving.

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait,
wait, wait, wait, wait.

Hold on here a sec.

Who told you that pizza
is my weakness?

Oh, yeah, let's go.

Alright, thank you.

Ready.

- Oh, what a gent.
- Yes.

Yeah,
but it's not about the money.

I think
it's a really good cause.

I could not agree
with you more.

I mean, I'm serious.

Like, that's amazing.

That's what's so cool about you.

I mean, everybody else is
so hung up on themselves and...

you really care about people.

I try.

What?

What, um... that's funny?

No, no, I'm sorry, no, um...

Oh.

You had a little something.

Yeah, I had a little something.

Oh, man.

These two are getting
awfully close, for now.

Alright, class, next week
is going to be

our school-wide spelling bee
and the winners of that

will advance to the finals.

And then the champions win
a trip to go to Disney World.

I know, yeah, yeah, I thought
that would get your attention.

I love spelling bees.

So last year,
Tristen was our big winner.

But this year's competition
is very stiff.

Emily at her last school,
she was the champion.

And then she placed
top 10 in the state finals.

Wow, Emily, you were at an event
people actually showed up to.

What was that, Tristen?

Nothing, Mr. Alpert.

Okay.

You know what,
it's time for some real fun.

Break out your math books.

Oh.

Oh.

How was school?

Okay.

- Yeah?
- Yeah.

You sure?

Yep.

If, uh, cookies, and sprinkles,
and frosting, uh,

don't put a smile on your face,
something's wrong.

What's going on?

It's just Tristen's been
bugging me lately.

Like any chance she gets.

And then her friends
just really need to chime in

just so they can feel cool.

Yeah, you know what,
that's what bullies do.

They recruit the weak minds
around them.

But I need you to prove
that you're above that.

I know.

I just...

I didn't react how you said
and I waited till I got home

to start crying.

Well...

I'm proud of you
for not letting them

get a rise out of you.

But I'll say this I don't like
people making you cry.

So what I'm gonna do is
is I'm gonna go down

and talk to that principal
of yours.

No, don't.

That will just make
things worse.

I just...
I miss my old school.

And I miss mom, and...

I just want my life back.

I know you do.

But I need you to understand
that I need your help.

There are little kids out there
that need your help, too.

You're so much like your mom.

You know how much she liked
to help people.

So, what do you say?

Wanna get with your old dad
and get ready for the most epic

father-daughter mission
in the galaxy?

Alright, team, what do we got?

Kid's name is Chase.

We just received a call
from his mother, Stacy.

And let me tell you,
she's a wreck.

Chase has asthma and can't play
sports like the other kids,

so they make fun of him
in gym class.

He gets terrific grades,
does really well

in science class,
and absolutely loves dinosaurs.

Mum invited Chase's entire class
and not one kid showed.

Well, that means
that we're going to have

to make an extra special
birthday for him.

Alright, people, let's gear up
and make a birthday!

- Hank.
- Yeah?

We talked about this,
that's my line.

Right, sorry.

Alright, people, let's gear up
and make a birthday!

Woah!

Barry, my boy.

I present to you
your new wheels.

Feast your eyes
on the birthday mobile.

Try to keep it under a 100,
will you?

Woah, I've never seen anything
like this before.

Who needs a Peloton
when you can ride in style

and get a workout.

The kids love it.

But wh...
why not just take a car?

Tradition, Barry.

Tradition, like the hat.

Well, is this thing even legal
to drive on the road?

We use the back roads, Barry,
the back roads.

Roar!

Are you Chase?

Oh well, I am T-Rex

and this is my trusted
side kick, Emsaurus.

Hello, wish you
a happy birthday!

Happy Birthday, rarr.

Happy Birthday, roar!

Look how cool that looks!

Oh, bravo, my friend,
so well done.

Exquisite.

That was wonderful.

And Chase's mom
has already contacted us

singing your praises.

The kid had a blast.

He said it was
his best birthday ever!

Ooh, man.

This uh, birthday business
is really exhausting.

Well, you already worked a job,
today.

You're an animal, Barry.

Oh, your indefatigable.

Huh?

It means
you don't tuck around easy.

It's a good thing.

Go home and get some rest,
both of you.

And come back tomorrow.

Alright.

Good night, everybody.

Let's go, kid.

Boys, what do you think?

Don't you think
Barry's something?

Oh, yeah, he's a howl.

Oh, very good.

A good day, eh?

I'm very happy.

Wake up, it's almost time to go.

Five more minutes.

You better get up
or you're gonna be late.

Role reversal?

Weird.

I got a bus to catch!

Okay, honey, have a good day.

I love you.

Barry.

Barry, open up.

Barry, open up, you're late!

Barry, I can hear you.
Barry!

Bianca.

Barry, I can hear you.

Oh, oh wow, it's really late.

Oh.

Barry!

Barry! Barry!

Barry, open this door!

Barry, get out here.

If you're not out here
in three seconds, you're fired!

Barry!

Oh, hi, Bianca.

Oh, jeez,
you don't look so good.

Yeah, I don't know
what happened.

But you know, whatever got
into me, something did

but it's like at 3:00 a.m.
last night, it's a headache,

- fever, explosive diarrhea.
- Oh.

- Massive amounts.
- Oh, my.

You don't even want to know
the details.

It could be catchy.

You might wanna keep
your distance, save yourself.

Oh, you know what, Barry,
that's a tough break.

But you could have called
the office,

because what if today
was the corporate inspection

and you weren't there
to greet them, Barry?

That's my mess up.

Yeah, see, you're fresh
out of mess-ups, Barry,

and as a matter of fact,
you're out of sick days, too.

So if this happens again,
you're gonna be looking

for a new job and I'd imagine
a new place to live,

so are we clear here?

Crystal.

Okay.

Get well...

soon.

Okay?

God... God bless you,
you're an angel.

Sounds really cool.

You should have seen
the dinosaur costume.

Wait, so you're like
a camp counselor for lame kids?

They're not lame,
a lot of them are just shy

and have a hard time
making friends.

I mean, it makes sense.

You would know how that feels.

Okay, class.

Got me there.

Take out your notebooks.

We are going to prep
for the spelling bee.

Better pay attention,
I'm coming for you.

We have a little girl named Anne
and she loves to play music.

She just learned how to play
the piano.

But she doesn't know
any other kids

that she can play music with.

Wait, what.

A rock and roll party?

Oh, I think we got this.

Let's go.

Yeah!

It's a Birthday Palooza.

Let's gear up
and make a birthday!

- You ready to rock?
- Yeah.

Yeah!

Well, hello there,
you must be Anne.

A little birdie
told us a secret.

Said you like to play music.

I play guitar.

- How about you?
- Piano.

Cool.

But I really want a keyboard.

Oh, gosh, I don't know
what to do about that.

What?

I think your mom
got you something.

You might wanna open that.

Dig in, come on, yeah!

- What!
- This is awesome!

Hey, you know,
we should test it out.

I just so happen to have
my guitar.

And I brought my drum kit
and if it's okay with mom,

we do a little jam session.

Can we, mom?

Of course you can, honey.

Rock and roll, yeah!

Yeah!

Happy Birthday, Anne!

Happy Birthday!

Oh no, thank you.

Thank you very, very much.

Alright, goodbye.

Bravo!

Bravo, you two!

Anne's mother just called,
another an five-star review.

And most importantly,
the kid had a blast.

Oh, the requests,
they're pouring in.

So, go home, get a little rest,

and then tomorrow
we do it all again!

Ow!

Feeling better, Barry?

Well, I have this corn
on my foot.

- Terrific.
- Listen, my toes are hurting...

So, if any of you have any work
that you can't get to,

feel free to dump it on Barry,
'cause I am certain

he is eager to make up
for lost time,

- isn't that right, Barry?
- Well then... absolutely.

Hey, you guys have anything,
give it to me.

I'm glad to do it.

That's the spirit.

It's my pleasure.

Now we know corporate's coming
any day.

In fact,
it could be any minute.

We just don't know

which is why we must always
be prepared.

Yeah, go, get to work, go!

Hey, Jess, hey Bar.

Someone had a serious accident
combined with a really bad

aim issue over the men's room
by the gym.

Oh, joy.

Yeah, it's a pretty ugly
over there,

I'd to take a mop and a bucket.

Yeah, oohwee, this guy,

always going the extra mile
even if it means toilet duty.

Ooh, I gotta go, got a big
malpractice case today.

They are so boring
and so lucrative.

GG and TTYL.

Too hip, gotta go!

Oh.

Oh no, oh.

No.

Hey, Barry, Ms. Ashcroft's dog
got out again.

There's a river of pee
in the lobby.

You gotta get down here fast.

Barry, I could use your help
in here.

I'm in a real crunch.

Barry, meet me at electrical.

We need to change
the light bulbs, stat.

Copy, I'll be right there.

Hey, Barry.
The restaurant across the street

just filled up our dumpster.

You might wanna work it out.

Barry.

Yeah, I'll be there in a jif.

Oh!

Well, Bartholomew, my boy,
aww.

You don't have your usual
characteristic spark.

Long day?

Oh, Mr. Jay,
I'm so glad it's you.

I thought it was Bianca.

She's been on me extra hard
today.

Oh, don't let Bianca
get to you.

You should have empathy
for the poor, sad, tragic,

wretched thing.

She takes herself and her job
far too seriously.

Yeah, well, we have this
inspection thing happening

and apparently,

if we don't score high,
it's all on her, so she's been,

you know...

Well, that's what it is.

She's under stress.

Wonder when her birthday is.

If anyone needs some cake
and puppets, it's her.

Yeah, well, I punch out
in 15 minutes, so uh...

We'll uh... we'll do
the birthday talk after that.

Oh, Barry, Barry,
I know you're tired.

I get it.

But as I always say,
birthdays come,

whether we're ready for them
or not.

You're making magic,

you're changing lives,
the children are happy.

We're booked
for the next two weeks.

Success is a result
of a daily commitment

to excellence.

And daily means today.

Daily commitment.

People, this is very serious.

We are booked solid.

I'm overjoyed.

And we have
to use every trick we know

to give these kids
the best day of their lives.

Barry, Emily, team,
in this neighborhood alone,

we have had six requests
for Mr. Jay's big time puppets.

Hank.

No, Magic Marker.

We're starting right here.

Alright?

Ah, that's how you make
the pizza, huh?

That's how you make the pizza,

you make the pizza like this.
Okay?

When you make the pizza,
you gotta go big with the pizza,

huh?

Nobody eats a little pizza,
you gotta make a big pizza.

Happy birthday to you!

Hey, bravissimo, bravissimo!

Fettucine, spaghetti, lasagna.

Ah, that is the only Italian
I know.

Go, ah, go.

Help, help.

Happy Birthday...

...to you.

Three birthday parties
in one day.

That's the happy birthday
hat-trick.

So my air conditioner,
it's acting up.

I think it's defective
or cursed.

No, it's just you need
to turn it on

when you want it cold
and off when you want it off.

So, on means cool?

I see.

Huh, I didn't get that.

Alright, well, good night.

Hey, Jess,
how about you and I...

How about I order some food
and you and I catch a movie?

I don't think so, Rick.

You'd rather go out,
'cause you've been

so cooped up, right?

Well, how about this,

I can get reservations
in your own town,

'cause I got conexiَns.

I'm just tired.

You weren't too tired
to have pizza with Barry

the other night.

What?

Barry, the stuff he said
about you.

He thinks you're great.

He's right, good night.

Think you can handle
the birthday missions

without me this weekend?

Well, you know,
it won't be easy,

but I'm sure you'll have
a really great time

at Alex's sleepover,
so that makes me happy.

I can't wait, I'm gonna show
him some stuff on the guitar

and he's gonna teach me
some piano.

Yeah, well, rock and roll.

And we're gonna practice
for the spelling bee,

because I have to demolish
Tristen.

You know what,
I'm so proud of you,

putting all that work in,
it's gonna pay off big time,

I'm telling you.

Thanks, dad.

Hey, Alex's mom's outside.

Okay, bye.

Hey, dad.

Yeah, did you forget something?

No, I just wanted to say
that it's been the best

birthday week in a long time.

Okay, bye!

I'm not crying, you're crying.

Alright, people, let's blow out
some candles.

Yeah!

This is my destiny, not yours.

This is mine, I got it.

I can't do it, go ahead.

Escalibur!

"International
Birthday Network."

Hmm.

I wonder, if Bianca knows
you're playing party planner,

when you should be getting
ready for the big inspection.

Hmm.

Won't be able to afford
pizza dates now, will you,

when you're out of your job?

No, you won't.

Aardvark.

A-A-R-D-V-A-R-K.

Aardvark.

How about...

...hippopotamus?

H-I-P-P-O-P-O-T-A-M-U-S.

Hippopotamus.

It's excellent.

You're right,
you're gonna crush this.

Now, eat protein.

Brain food.

Brain food.

Code red, people.

We have a code red here.

Corporate inspection is today,

I need all units in the lobby
in five minutes.

Repeat,
all units, lobby, five minutes.

You've got this.

This is what we dreamed for.

Today is the day,

the moment
we've all been waiting for.

At 1:00 p.m., those doors
will open and in will walk

the most influential people
from corporate,

sent here to inspect
our every move.

Now I know this goes
without saying,

but any failure to complete
the given task today,

will result
in immediate termination.

I don't have time for it,
not today, remember.

'Cause today,
we prefer keeps.

Well, that's a pretty good
speech.

Mm.

Hello, everyone.

You know what time it is.

It's time for those
marvelous minds to get together.

Oh, yeah.

It's spelling bee time!

Hey, Emily, you're going down.

D-O-W-N.

Down.

It's time to spell, kids.

Hank, this is our best birthday
month since 1993.

Barry sure takes the cake.

Puts candles on it, too.

Birthday joke.

Sorry to interrupt, boss,
but, well, we thought

you'd be best suited
to take this one.

International Birthday Network,
Mr. Jay speaking,

president, CEO, founder,
and emperor of birthday land.

Oh, thank goodness.

Hi, yeah.

It's my son, Jason.

You see today's his birthday
and his so-called friends,

they said they'll throw him
a party

and they flat out left him
in the lurch.

Mhmm.

I'm sorry,
I'm talking too fast.

Then I'll get right to it.

Jason's threatening to run away
from home

and I just don't know
what to do.

That's terrible.

It's terrible.

I'm... I'm sorry to hear that,
but you made the right call.

We deal with this sort of thing
all the time.

We'll make sure that Jason
has an extra special birthday.

Well, isn't it my lucky day.

Yes, of course.

My address is 849,
Juniper Street,

City Laments, 10019.

Right, thank you.

Alright, there we go.

Hmm, not bad.

Barry!

Barry, we have an emergency.

Code 47B.

The kid's name is Jason,
he likes pirates.

Wh... what's a Code 47B?

Code 47B, poh...
potential runaway.

Oh, well, that's bad.

Yeah, very.

Um, well, look,
we'll take care of it.

Um, I'll be ready to rock
as soon as I punch out, okay?

No, we can't wait that long.

What do you... what do you mean?

Today's the inspection day.

Corporate has their people
coming down here to greet us.

Bianca will fire me on the spot.

So lobby duty takes precedent.

It's uh... it's nice
to finally know

your true priorities.

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

Come... come... come back.

Uh, um.

Uh, God, I can't believe
I'm doing this.

I think I have an idea.

Truncate,
T-R-U-N-C-A-T-E.

Truncate.

That is correct.

Good job, Emily.

You move on to
the finals against Tristen.

Well, isn't this exciting.

Two returning champions
going head-to-head

for the biggest spelling prize
in the school.

I might as well
update my resume,

this is never gonna work.

Oh, no, it's perfect.

It will fool your own mother.

Here, put this on.

What is that?

It's for the kid's party,
he loves pirates.

Wait, wait, wait,
here's the secret weapon.

Look, I'm Captain Mickey MaCaw.

Who wants to bury some treasure?

Arr.

That's a start.

Come on, come on.

Hey, Mr. Jay, yeah, hi,
I got to the location

where the party's
supposed to be

and it's nothing
but an empty field.

I mean, there's not even
a house here.

It's... there's nothing.

It's uh... I... I think that
we've been birthday bamboozled.

Yeah, yeah.

Okay, alright,
I'm coming back to base.

Hey, Bianca.

Rick here, uh unit 2A.

Yeah, listen.

That darn air conditioner,
it's acting up again.

Yeah, second time this week,
yeah.

Could you send Barry?

Yeah, he's got a real knack
for fixing that thing.

Right.

Oh, I love that guy.

Oh, he's terrific.

Yeah.

Thank you.

Yeah, I love that guy.

Barry, this is Bianca, over.

Bianca for Barry, over.

We have a malfunctioning AC
in unit 2A

and I need you up there fast,
quick, and in a hurry.

Where's this guy?

Hey Barry, do you know
where I put my...

No.

No, no, no, no.

Hi, um, you guys
must be the inspectors.

Well, let me introduce you
to our manager, Bianca.

She's really excited
to meet you guys.

Okay, Tristen,
please spell for us questionnaire.

Okay, that's easy.

Uh, that's questionnaire.

Q-U-E-S-T-I-O-N-A-I-R-E
Questionnaire.

I'm sorry, that is incorrect.

Emily, can you please correctly
spell questionnaire?

And if you do,
you will be the new champion.

Q-U-E-S-T-I-O-N-N-A-I-R-E,

questionnaire.

Your winner
and new spelling bee champion,

Emily Burtonday!

I did it.

Mr. Alpert,
if it's alright with you,

I'd like to give the trophy
to Emily.

Well, that is the most honorable
demonstration of sportswomenship

I've ever seen, go ahead.

Thanks, Mr. Alpert.

Here. You outspelled me
and you deserve it.

And I'm sorry for the way
I treated you

the last few weeks.

I used to be the new kid
and I got picked on a lot, too.

I know exactly how it feels.

So it was really dumb of me
to do it to you.

You were the toughest
competition I ever had,

you know.

Really?

I bet we'd make
a pretty good pair

in the state-wide
team challenge.

Yeah, I bet we would,
if you let me be a partner.

I'd like that, if you'd show up.

Come on. Come on.

29-minute round trip,
not so bad.

Oh, here she is.

Here I am.

Where's Barry?

Uh, Barry...
Barry went to, uh, go...

Uh, he's right there.

Barry.

Hi, Bianca.

Look, I'm sorry that I'm late,
it... it was an emergency.

I... I had something
I had to take care of.

Where was your emergency,
on the Seven Seas?

I am so sorry,
this is so embarrassing.

Um, Barry, you leave me
no choice.

Are you gonna fire me?

You know how important today
was to the building, Barry.

Just in time for the fireworks.

I just want you to know
that we do not condone

this behavior and our dress code
is strictly enforced

at all times.

Barry, I'm gonna have
to let you go.

Shocker.

You're fired!

Not so fast, Ms. Bianca.

I believe the building's owner
and general manager

may take issue with that.

Huh?

Surprise!

The secret's out.

Bianca, you poor thing,
when you were talking

to corporate,
you were talking to me.

No, I've been writing letters
to a Mr. Jeffrey.

My card.

John Jameson Jeffery,
all my initials are Js.

My friends call me Mr. Jay.

You shouldn't, not ever.

And here you have already met
my beloved team

and here is my new top guy.

Wait, Mr. Jay,
you own the building?

Every floor.

You didn't think I made
my living with balloons

and puppets, do you?

Had to pay the bills, son.

You proved today that your heart

- is in the right place.
- What?

You took the birthday oath
and you dedicated yourself

to make sure that
no little shaver

will ever go lonely
on his day of days.

And today when his job
was in jeopardy,

he showed us that he knows
what matters most.

It was my honor, sir.

And if it weren't for a snake
in the grass,

Barry would have never left
his post and lost his job.

What do you mean,
what snake in the grass?

That sneaky, slippery,
slithering...

snake.

A reptile,
in a cheap, knock-off suit.

You think you're smart,
don't you?

You know who you are?

You are a bad boy
and a party pooper.

The kind who walks around
here with an expression

like he got a sour stomach
and a tooth ache.

Excuse me?

Oh, how's that Jason doing,
hmm?

I'm sorry, who?

Your alleged son.

Let me tell you something.

When you try to pull a con
by making a phony call

to a major charitable
institution, Rick,

if that's your real name,

you should make sure
that the number is blocked.

That's preposterous,
you have no proof of anything.

See, that's where you're wrong.

Once we found out Barry
was sent on a wild goose chase,

we pulled up our phone records,

got some help
from our pals downtown,

and traced the number
right back to you.

Yeah, as an attorney,
you would probably know

that attempting to defraud
a charitable organization

is a crime.

There must be...
there must be some mistake.

Well, the biggest mistake is me
letting people like you

live in my building.

You can't be serious.

I'm very serious, very serious.

And I would suggest
that you consider

this conversation
your eviction notice.

I want you out by tonight.

Man, man.

Can I keep my parking spot?

Uh-uh.

What about my gym membership?

No.

This is not fair.

- It's not fair.
- Well.

It's not fair, it's not fair,
it's not fair.

It's just not fair!

It's not fair!

Barry, I am so proud of you.

Your apprenticeship
has been nothing short of a wow.

You are ready to take over.

My doctor has recommended
that I might think

about slowing down, retiring,
buy a pool and...

So, I'm leaving you
this entire building,

the International Birthday
Network

and most importantly,
the puppets.

You are now officially
Mr. Birthday.

I dub you the second emperor
of birthday land.

Well, I'm a little overwhelmed.

Speech, speech, speech, speech.

Speech!

Uh, uh, well, uh...
as a second emperor

of the... the...
the birthday land, I guess,

I would like to declare this day
every year, uh, Mr. Jay Day.

Oh, Barry!

Mr. Jay.

Dad, I won.

What!

Yeah.

No, you did not.

Everybody,
my daughter is officially

the Spelling Bee Champion
of the universe.

Oh, good for you!

- Well done!
- Well done.

Check it out.

Oh.

I made friends with Tristen.

Excellent.

They finally came around
just like you said.

And they even want to be a part

of our next big
birthday mission.

Really?

Yeah.

- Awesome! We have elves.
- Okay.

We have elves, oh!

A year of change
isn't so awful after all.

And an awful lot
can change in a year.

I'll never forget my dad
for making me smile

during those tough times.

He encouraged me to hold
onto hope a little bit longer.

And he said, eventually
things will get better.

And they sure did.

My next birthday
was a full house.

Happy birthday!

And I loved
every minute of it.

It was like all of a sudden
I had all these new aunts,

and uncles, and friends.

Like the family
I always wanted.

Oh, thank you, my love.

Let me see that ring.

Oh.

Aww, right.

Huh, yeah?

You did good.

And thanks to social media,

the International
Birthday Network

truly became a real network.

Turns out, Tristen's a wiz
on the computer.

She was able to get us
over a million likes

in the first week
and really helped us bring

the IBN into the 21st century.

Happy birthday, dear Emily,

happy birthday to you!

And many more!

Provided by explosiveskull
https://twitter.com/kaboomskull