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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:36,238 --> 00:00:41,238 Provided by explosiveskull https://twitter.com/kaboomskull 2 00:01:23,968 --> 00:01:25,870 I have a theory: 3 00:01:25,903 --> 00:01:28,738 hating someone feels disturbingly like falling in 4 00:01:28,773 --> 00:01:30,507 love with them. 5 00:01:31,175 --> 00:01:34,846 Your stomach twists and flips, your appetite and sleep are 6 00:01:34,879 --> 00:01:37,815 shredded, your heart beats heavy and bright, 7 00:01:37,849 --> 00:01:40,117 nearly visible through your flesh and clothes. 8 00:01:40,151 --> 00:01:41,919 Can you please hold the elevator? 9 00:01:41,953 --> 00:01:43,120 - Sorry. - Ooh! 10 00:01:43,154 --> 00:01:44,922 Already in motion. 11 00:01:44,956 --> 00:01:46,090 But... 12 00:01:46,123 --> 00:01:47,792 Every interaction spikes your blood with 13 00:01:47,825 --> 00:01:48,658 adrenaline... 14 00:01:48,692 --> 00:01:49,861 Ugh! 15 00:01:49,894 --> 00:01:52,395 And your body is barely under your control. 16 00:01:53,496 --> 00:01:56,067 This used to be the home of Gamin Publishing, 17 00:01:56,100 --> 00:01:59,904 known for its insistence on literature as art... 18 00:01:59,937 --> 00:02:02,073 until a year ago, faced with bankruptcy, 19 00:02:02,106 --> 00:02:04,942 it was forced to merge with Bexley Books, 20 00:02:04,976 --> 00:02:08,012 an evil empire known for ghostwritten autobiographies of 21 00:02:08,045 --> 00:02:10,547 brain-damaged sports stars. 22 00:02:11,215 --> 00:02:15,719 Make no mistake: the Bexleys and Gamins are at war. 23 00:02:22,193 --> 00:02:25,196 As for American Psycho over there playing the copycat game 24 00:02:25,229 --> 00:02:28,498 for no reason but to piss me off... 25 00:02:28,531 --> 00:02:31,936 yeah, hate him with a passion. 26 00:02:34,038 --> 00:02:36,207 I mean, sure, he's easy on the eyes, 27 00:02:36,240 --> 00:02:38,575 but don't let that fool you. 28 00:02:38,608 --> 00:02:39,877 As Shakespeare would say: 29 00:02:39,911 --> 00:02:42,880 Sometimes, fair is foul. 30 00:03:23,120 --> 00:03:27,058 My reasons for hating Joshua Templeman are several. 31 00:03:27,091 --> 00:03:28,893 One: I have never seen him smile. 32 00:03:28,926 --> 00:03:30,094 Oh, hi! 33 00:03:30,127 --> 00:03:30,928 You must be Josh. 34 00:03:30,962 --> 00:03:33,097 I hear we'll be working together. 35 00:03:33,130 --> 00:03:33,798 Oh! 36 00:03:33,831 --> 00:03:35,967 I got you a plan for your desk. 37 00:03:45,142 --> 00:03:47,744 Two: he's a total control freak. 38 00:03:47,778 --> 00:03:49,246 Just look at his desk. 39 00:04:01,959 --> 00:04:05,129 I mean, the guy wears the same shirts in the same order every 40 00:04:05,162 --> 00:04:06,263 week. 41 00:04:06,297 --> 00:04:08,132 Monday: dove gray. 42 00:04:08,165 --> 00:04:09,834 Tuesday: white. 43 00:04:09,867 --> 00:04:11,235 Wednesday: powder blue. 44 00:04:11,268 --> 00:04:13,603 Thursday: window pane blue. 45 00:04:13,636 --> 00:04:16,007 And Friday: true blue. 46 00:04:16,606 --> 00:04:20,211 Reason number three: he always corrects any tiny mistake I 47 00:04:20,244 --> 00:04:21,711 make. 48 00:04:22,913 --> 00:04:26,117 Four, and perhaps most importantly: after the merger, 49 00:04:26,150 --> 00:04:29,286 he waltzed in with a list of people to fire and it included 50 00:04:29,320 --> 00:04:31,088 all my work friends... 51 00:04:31,122 --> 00:04:33,556 which were all my friends. 52 00:04:35,026 --> 00:04:39,063 So now, I'm trapped here, day after endless day, 53 00:04:39,096 --> 00:04:43,134 all alone with my one maniacal nemesis. 54 00:05:03,020 --> 00:05:04,155 Hi, good morning. 55 00:05:04,188 --> 00:05:05,990 Good morning. 56 00:05:06,023 --> 00:05:06,891 Has Bexley seen this? 57 00:05:06,924 --> 00:05:08,993 I emailed it to Josh, so I'm assuming. 58 00:05:09,026 --> 00:05:10,627 We're adding something at the top of the agenda. 59 00:05:10,660 --> 00:05:11,829 Okay, do you want me to adjust it? 60 00:05:11,862 --> 00:05:13,197 No, this is fine. 61 00:05:13,230 --> 00:05:15,166 I'd rather it be a surprise. 62 00:05:15,199 --> 00:05:15,698 Quarterlies? 63 00:05:15,732 --> 00:05:16,834 On your desk. 64 00:05:16,867 --> 00:05:17,734 How do they look? 65 00:05:17,768 --> 00:05:19,003 Eh, lower than projected. 66 00:05:19,036 --> 00:05:20,237 But they are better than Q2. 67 00:05:20,271 --> 00:05:23,007 And I talked to the marketing team about alternative print 68 00:05:23,040 --> 00:05:25,376 strategies, which I really think could help moving forward. 69 00:05:25,409 --> 00:05:28,012 And I sent you a memo about a company-wide team-building event 70 00:05:28,045 --> 00:05:29,246 that I'm planning. 71 00:05:29,280 --> 00:05:31,048 But workers would rather eat rat skeletons than participate 72 00:05:31,082 --> 00:05:32,183 in group activities. 73 00:05:32,216 --> 00:05:35,052 Agreed, but HR has been overwhelmed with complaints 74 00:05:35,086 --> 00:05:35,953 since the merger. 75 00:05:35,986 --> 00:05:38,655 Half of which are about you and Josh. 76 00:05:38,688 --> 00:05:39,857 Don't mind her. 77 00:05:39,890 --> 00:05:41,025 I don't know what I'd do without you. 78 00:05:41,058 --> 00:05:45,262 Well, you'd be all alone with Satan and his hell hound. 79 00:05:45,496 --> 00:05:47,164 - See you inside. - Okay. 80 00:05:47,198 --> 00:05:48,165 Lucy! 81 00:05:48,199 --> 00:05:49,366 I am so glad that I caught you. 82 00:05:49,400 --> 00:05:52,937 I was hoping that I can ask you for, like, a tiny favor? 83 00:05:52,970 --> 00:05:54,405 I need an extension on the monthly report. 84 00:05:54,438 --> 00:05:56,739 My new puppy ate peanut butter last night and she's totally 85 00:05:56,774 --> 00:05:57,875 allergic. 86 00:05:57,908 --> 00:06:00,878 She put the "poo" in "Cockapoo," if you know what I mean. 87 00:06:00,911 --> 00:06:01,879 Sure. 88 00:06:01,912 --> 00:06:03,047 Of course. 89 00:06:03,080 --> 00:06:03,981 You're the best. 90 00:06:04,014 --> 00:06:06,283 I'll have it Monday, Wednesday at the latest. 91 00:06:08,252 --> 00:06:09,920 That was pathetic. 92 00:06:09,954 --> 00:06:10,720 Brrt. 93 00:06:10,754 --> 00:06:12,256 Who is Joshua Templeman? 94 00:06:13,491 --> 00:06:15,793 You know, Lucinda, you could just tell her to do her job, 95 00:06:15,826 --> 00:06:18,796 but no, you have to be the good guy. 96 00:06:18,829 --> 00:06:21,031 It's a lot better than being the asshole. 97 00:06:21,065 --> 00:06:23,067 Happy Thanksgiving! 98 00:06:23,434 --> 00:06:24,201 'Kay. 99 00:06:24,235 --> 00:06:26,370 - Cupcake? - Oh. 100 00:06:26,403 --> 00:06:28,105 - Thanks. - You're welcome. 101 00:06:28,139 --> 00:06:29,840 You want one? 102 00:06:30,307 --> 00:06:32,943 You remembered my birthday! 103 00:06:33,811 --> 00:06:35,745 Of course! 104 00:06:35,779 --> 00:06:36,881 Our... 105 00:06:36,914 --> 00:06:38,748 little birthday turkey. 106 00:06:38,782 --> 00:06:39,749 Yay! 107 00:06:39,783 --> 00:06:40,818 Happy birthday. 108 00:06:40,851 --> 00:06:42,019 Ooh... 109 00:06:42,052 --> 00:06:43,454 You know, I watched this insane documentary last 110 00:06:43,487 --> 00:06:44,555 night. 111 00:06:44,588 --> 00:06:47,424 Three AM, YouTube rabbit hole, "History of Baking." 112 00:06:47,458 --> 00:06:50,094 Did you know that DaVinci invented the blender? 113 00:06:50,127 --> 00:06:52,062 I invented pizza plate. 114 00:06:53,063 --> 00:06:55,199 It's a second pizza you put under your first pizza to catch 115 00:06:55,232 --> 00:06:56,100 the crumbs. 116 00:06:56,133 --> 00:06:57,067 All right, can we please get started? 117 00:06:57,101 --> 00:06:59,403 Or do you need another minute to chit-chat? 118 00:06:59,436 --> 00:07:00,971 No, we're good to go. 119 00:07:01,005 --> 00:07:02,206 Oh, your tie's crooked. 120 00:07:02,239 --> 00:07:05,109 Okay, thank you all for being here the day before 121 00:07:05,142 --> 00:07:06,076 Thanksgiving. 122 00:07:06,110 --> 00:07:07,144 I know some of you are traveling so we'll... 123 00:07:07,178 --> 00:07:08,745 Check this out. 124 00:07:08,779 --> 00:07:09,780 Richard! 125 00:07:09,813 --> 00:07:11,282 So we'll try to keep this short. 126 00:07:11,315 --> 00:07:14,218 Yes, and Friday after Thanksgiving will not be a paid 127 00:07:14,251 --> 00:07:16,287 holiday, FYI. 128 00:07:16,320 --> 00:07:18,422 Okay, Richard and I have an announcement to make: 129 00:07:18,455 --> 00:07:20,291 we're adding a new position to the team. 130 00:07:20,324 --> 00:07:23,260 Yes, we're going to be hiring a managing director who will 131 00:07:23,294 --> 00:07:26,130 oversee each department and he will report to me. 132 00:07:26,163 --> 00:07:28,299 He or she will report to both of us. 133 00:07:28,332 --> 00:07:32,403 The job is open to external applicants, naturally, but... 134 00:07:32,436 --> 00:07:35,105 I'd very much like to hire from within. 135 00:07:35,139 --> 00:07:37,508 Yeah, we will be putting together an independent panel 136 00:07:37,541 --> 00:07:39,877 since we don't always see eye-to-eye. 137 00:07:39,910 --> 00:07:42,179 The final candidates will make their presentations to the board 138 00:07:42,213 --> 00:07:44,148 after the New Year. 139 00:07:44,481 --> 00:07:47,017 May the best man win. 140 00:07:58,162 --> 00:07:59,430 That job is mine, Shortcake. 141 00:07:59,463 --> 00:08:01,131 Oh, your confidence is compelling, 142 00:08:01,165 --> 00:08:02,299 but you forget one thing. 143 00:08:02,333 --> 00:08:04,034 - Hm? - Everyone hates you. 144 00:08:04,068 --> 00:08:05,336 Oh, they don't hate me, they fear me, 145 00:08:05,369 --> 00:08:06,237 which makes me effective. 146 00:08:06,270 --> 00:08:07,404 You know, when I'm your boss, 147 00:08:07,438 --> 00:08:10,341 I will require you to do everything I say with a smile. 148 00:08:10,374 --> 00:08:12,843 When I'm your boss, I'm gonna work you so hard that you start 149 00:08:12,876 --> 00:08:14,211 using the office as your home address. 150 00:08:14,245 --> 00:08:17,214 When I'm your boss, I will enforce casual Fridays. 151 00:08:17,248 --> 00:08:18,382 Hawaiian shirts mandatory. 152 00:08:18,415 --> 00:08:20,884 When I'm your boss, I'm implementing a new dress code. 153 00:08:20,918 --> 00:08:24,054 No more looking like an elementary school librarian. 154 00:08:25,256 --> 00:08:28,325 If you get the job, I'll resign. 155 00:08:28,359 --> 00:08:30,094 - Really? - Just like you will if I do. 156 00:08:30,127 --> 00:08:31,996 - I don't quit. - Then I'll fire you. 157 00:08:32,029 --> 00:08:34,164 Ah, but I'm incapable of giving you that pleasure. 158 00:08:34,198 --> 00:08:35,899 Aw, it's not the first time you've said that to a woman, 159 00:08:35,933 --> 00:08:37,334 is it? 160 00:08:37,368 --> 00:08:39,303 Then we agree: if one of us gets the job, 161 00:08:39,336 --> 00:08:40,304 the other has to quit. 162 00:08:40,337 --> 00:08:42,172 Fine, agreed. 163 00:08:45,409 --> 00:08:46,343 Oh, hey, Danny. 164 00:08:46,377 --> 00:08:47,378 I come bearing gifts. 165 00:08:47,411 --> 00:08:49,346 - Oh! - Oh, sorry. 166 00:08:49,380 --> 00:08:51,348 Shoulda... waited for some eye contact. 167 00:08:51,382 --> 00:08:52,549 The new book! 168 00:08:52,583 --> 00:08:55,085 That's so nice of you, thank you. 169 00:08:55,119 --> 00:08:56,520 Designers got some advanced copies, 170 00:08:56,553 --> 00:08:58,255 so... no big deal. 171 00:08:58,289 --> 00:08:59,556 Oh, no. 172 00:09:00,024 --> 00:09:01,225 This is the cover? 173 00:09:01,258 --> 00:09:03,427 Sorry, Bexley made us do it. 174 00:09:03,460 --> 00:09:05,963 The book's about an archaeologist with autism. 175 00:09:05,996 --> 00:09:08,299 I mean, does he even read the jackets? 176 00:09:08,332 --> 00:09:09,400 Doubtful. 177 00:09:09,433 --> 00:09:10,301 Oh! 178 00:09:10,334 --> 00:09:10,968 And, uh, this came for you in the mail, 179 00:09:11,001 --> 00:09:12,903 so I took the liberty to... 180 00:09:12,936 --> 00:09:14,138 Oh! 181 00:09:14,171 --> 00:09:15,572 0 for two. 182 00:09:16,240 --> 00:09:18,309 Are you ordering your tiny clothes online again? 183 00:09:18,342 --> 00:09:20,277 Just a box small enough for your withered heart. 184 00:09:20,311 --> 00:09:22,246 - Ah... - Bet it's another Smurf. 185 00:09:22,279 --> 00:09:23,580 Another Smurf? 186 00:09:23,614 --> 00:09:25,249 As in multiple Smurfs? 187 00:09:25,282 --> 00:09:28,218 So is this like a Smurf village that you're putting together? 188 00:09:28,252 --> 00:09:29,420 - Are you doing little, like... - Okay, just... 189 00:09:29,453 --> 00:09:31,322 Smurf Army Civil War reenactments? 190 00:09:31,355 --> 00:09:34,091 Oh, she's got the whole collection. 191 00:09:34,124 --> 00:09:35,592 How adorable. 192 00:09:35,626 --> 00:09:37,394 Will you shut up? 193 00:09:37,428 --> 00:09:38,996 Thank you for the delivery, Danny. 194 00:09:39,029 --> 00:09:39,697 Anytime. 195 00:09:39,730 --> 00:09:41,265 Yes, Danny, thank you so much. 196 00:09:41,298 --> 00:09:43,000 You got it, JT. 197 00:09:47,604 --> 00:09:49,273 Well... 198 00:09:49,306 --> 00:09:50,941 catch you dreamboats on the flip. 199 00:09:50,974 --> 00:09:52,009 - Hit it. - No. 200 00:09:52,042 --> 00:09:53,277 Okay. 201 00:09:53,477 --> 00:09:54,978 Bye. 202 00:09:57,381 --> 00:09:59,650 That poor sap thinks you're flirting with him. 203 00:09:59,683 --> 00:10:01,418 The same way people think you're flirting with me? 204 00:10:01,452 --> 00:10:03,554 Shortcake, if I was flirting with you, 205 00:10:03,587 --> 00:10:04,455 you would know it. 206 00:10:04,488 --> 00:10:06,490 I didn't know frat boys knew how to flirt. 207 00:10:06,523 --> 00:10:09,360 I thought they just roofied girls' drinks. 208 00:10:21,205 --> 00:10:22,406 Mm-hm. 209 00:10:22,439 --> 00:10:26,577 Yeah, no, I understand but we're doing smaller hardcover runs. 210 00:10:26,610 --> 00:10:31,181 No, no, no, same print run, just distributed differently. 211 00:10:31,215 --> 00:10:34,385 Sure, I will put you through to accounting. 212 00:10:34,685 --> 00:10:36,220 Ugh! 213 00:10:48,565 --> 00:10:50,401 What? 214 00:10:52,169 --> 00:10:53,036 Richard! 215 00:10:53,070 --> 00:10:54,037 I have a copy of the new book for you. 216 00:10:54,071 --> 00:10:55,038 Ah! 217 00:10:55,072 --> 00:10:56,440 Hey! 218 00:10:56,473 --> 00:10:59,510 Dr. Josh, you didn't tell me it was in. 219 00:10:59,543 --> 00:11:01,345 'Stripping Time.' 220 00:11:01,378 --> 00:11:02,379 Cover's all me, you know. 221 00:11:02,413 --> 00:11:03,313 It really grabs ya, right? 222 00:11:03,347 --> 00:11:07,484 Mm, yes, it's... it's definitely eye-catching. 223 00:11:07,518 --> 00:11:08,452 Yeah. 224 00:11:08,485 --> 00:11:10,354 You got my tee time set up for tomorrow, Josh? 225 00:11:10,387 --> 00:11:11,321 8:30. 226 00:11:11,355 --> 00:11:12,923 Good man. 227 00:11:14,391 --> 00:11:17,361 I gotta go work on my stroke. 228 00:11:18,028 --> 00:11:18,562 See you kids in the morning. 229 00:11:18,595 --> 00:11:20,431 All right, goodnight! 230 00:11:20,464 --> 00:11:21,498 Out. 231 00:11:22,533 --> 00:11:23,934 Dick. 232 00:11:24,601 --> 00:11:28,439 It's not 'Stripping Time, ' it's 'Stripping Time!' 233 00:11:28,472 --> 00:11:29,606 This has nothing to do with strippers. 234 00:11:29,640 --> 00:11:31,241 I swear, that guy's like the worst version of the worst 235 00:11:31,275 --> 00:11:32,443 version of himself. 236 00:11:32,476 --> 00:11:36,113 Did you seriously just refer to the cover as "eye-catching?" 237 00:11:36,146 --> 00:11:38,549 Looks like it was designed by a horny fifth grader. 238 00:11:38,582 --> 00:11:40,717 Not exactly consistent with the tone of the novel. 239 00:11:40,752 --> 00:11:42,486 Since when do you read the books we publish? 240 00:11:42,519 --> 00:11:44,688 I was just trying to fill my Good Reads quota. 241 00:11:44,721 --> 00:11:45,689 Oh, your one book of the year? 242 00:11:45,722 --> 00:11:48,559 You do know comic books don't count, right? 243 00:11:48,592 --> 00:11:50,494 I fell asleep three times reading the first page. 244 00:11:50,527 --> 00:11:53,430 Well, it is exhausting to read above your grade level. 245 00:11:53,464 --> 00:11:55,532 Maybe you're not ready for chapter books yet. 246 00:11:55,566 --> 00:11:56,733 It was boring. 247 00:11:56,768 --> 00:11:59,771 It was a masterpiece before Bexley cut 200 pages to make it 248 00:11:59,804 --> 00:12:01,738 more of an airport read. 249 00:12:02,139 --> 00:12:04,441 At least he kept in some of the landscape descriptions. 250 00:12:04,475 --> 00:12:07,411 Oh, yeah, it was thrilling reading about the topography of 251 00:12:07,444 --> 00:12:08,579 Fort Ticonderoga. 252 00:12:08,612 --> 00:12:10,514 Whatever, I loved it. 253 00:12:10,547 --> 00:12:11,715 So, big Thanksgiving plans? 254 00:12:11,748 --> 00:12:14,384 You gonna be posting some Smurf fanfic and eating cranberry 255 00:12:14,418 --> 00:12:15,252 sauce out of a can? 256 00:12:15,285 --> 00:12:16,520 And what about the Templeman family? 257 00:12:16,553 --> 00:12:19,156 Drinking the blood of a virgin and then staring at each other 258 00:12:19,189 --> 00:12:19,723 in silence? 259 00:12:19,757 --> 00:12:20,390 Oh, how'd you know? 260 00:12:20,424 --> 00:12:22,159 We're looking for donations. 261 00:12:22,192 --> 00:12:23,293 Oh, hi, Jeanette! 262 00:12:23,327 --> 00:12:25,295 Oh, I love those earrings. 263 00:12:25,329 --> 00:12:26,463 Don't even try. 264 00:12:26,497 --> 00:12:28,599 Four complaints this week, four! 265 00:12:28,632 --> 00:12:31,101 Three about the break room incident on Monday. 266 00:12:31,134 --> 00:12:31,970 Here we go. 267 00:12:32,035 --> 00:12:32,302 Are we ready for our lesson? 268 00:12:32,336 --> 00:12:33,203 Okay? 269 00:12:33,237 --> 00:12:35,472 This is a comma, and this is a period. 270 00:12:35,506 --> 00:12:36,673 When you take a period and... 271 00:12:36,707 --> 00:12:38,542 You better put that doughnut hole away or I'm gonna shove it 272 00:12:38,575 --> 00:12:39,743 up your semicolon! 273 00:12:39,777 --> 00:12:42,379 You'd like that, wouldn't you, Shrimp? 274 00:12:42,613 --> 00:12:44,114 Mommy and Daddy fight sometimes. 275 00:12:44,147 --> 00:12:45,482 We have discussions. 276 00:12:45,516 --> 00:12:48,252 Like how Mommy constantly forgets to CC Daddy on 277 00:12:48,285 --> 00:12:49,419 company-wide memos. 278 00:12:49,453 --> 00:12:51,756 Or how Daddy has a cork up his ass about the format of 279 00:12:51,789 --> 00:12:53,123 quarterly reports. 280 00:12:53,156 --> 00:12:54,291 Mommy and Daddy? 281 00:12:54,324 --> 00:12:55,827 Are you serious? 282 00:12:55,860 --> 00:12:57,494 You two are the worst part of my job. 283 00:13:40,437 --> 00:13:42,472 There are literally millions of guys in 284 00:13:42,506 --> 00:13:43,607 this city. 285 00:13:43,640 --> 00:13:44,608 Well, it's not that easy to find a good one. 286 00:13:44,641 --> 00:13:46,376 What about that guy from work? 287 00:13:46,410 --> 00:13:47,511 Who, Josh? 288 00:13:47,544 --> 00:13:49,479 Honey, you talk about him all the time. 289 00:13:49,513 --> 00:13:50,514 I do not. 290 00:13:50,547 --> 00:13:52,850 I just worry about you all alone. 291 00:13:52,884 --> 00:13:53,785 I know, Mom. 292 00:13:53,818 --> 00:13:54,718 I'm fine. 293 00:13:54,752 --> 00:13:55,887 Well, we miss you, Sweetie. 294 00:13:55,920 --> 00:13:57,220 Yeah, I do too. 295 00:13:57,254 --> 00:13:59,156 Hey, look, Mom, I gotta go. 296 00:13:59,189 --> 00:14:00,792 I'm walking out the door; I'm gonna meet the girls for some 297 00:14:00,825 --> 00:14:01,625 drinks. 298 00:14:01,658 --> 00:14:02,526 But I'll call you tomorrow, okay? 299 00:14:02,559 --> 00:14:04,361 All right, love you, Pumpkin. 300 00:14:04,394 --> 00:14:05,162 I love you, too. 301 00:14:05,195 --> 00:14:06,196 Happy Thanksgiving. 302 00:14:06,229 --> 00:14:07,765 Happy Thanksgiving. 303 00:14:23,848 --> 00:14:27,384 Happy Smurfs are all alike. 304 00:14:27,584 --> 00:14:32,589 But Unhappy Smurfs are all unhappy in their own ways. 305 00:14:33,557 --> 00:14:38,763 Smurfette pondered this as she watched Grouchy Smurf squash a 306 00:14:40,297 --> 00:14:44,735 strawberry under his shiny boot, 307 00:14:44,769 --> 00:14:49,774 grumbling to himself about the un-Smurfiness of the world. 308 00:15:10,828 --> 00:15:15,599 I'm gonna work you so fucking hard. 309 00:15:35,619 --> 00:15:37,621 Son of a bitch. 310 00:15:51,668 --> 00:15:53,805 Wowzers, what's the occasion? 311 00:15:53,838 --> 00:15:55,472 Psychological warfare. 312 00:15:55,505 --> 00:15:57,340 Time to get into his head. 313 00:16:17,862 --> 00:16:18,863 Ow. 314 00:16:18,896 --> 00:16:20,031 Smooth, Shortcake. 315 00:16:20,064 --> 00:16:21,498 Ugh, shut up. 316 00:16:21,531 --> 00:16:22,900 What is this? 317 00:16:24,334 --> 00:16:25,669 Travel shot glass? 318 00:16:25,702 --> 00:16:27,537 That... 319 00:16:28,039 --> 00:16:30,373 would be a menstrual cup. 320 00:16:30,407 --> 00:16:31,541 Right. 321 00:16:31,575 --> 00:16:32,342 My next guess. 322 00:16:32,375 --> 00:16:33,211 What? 323 00:16:33,243 --> 00:16:33,845 These are better for the environment, 324 00:16:33,878 --> 00:16:35,679 and tampons are dangerous. 325 00:16:35,712 --> 00:16:36,814 You know what? 326 00:16:36,848 --> 00:16:38,715 No, this is none of your business. 327 00:16:41,886 --> 00:16:43,888 Hot date tonight? 328 00:16:45,455 --> 00:16:46,991 I might. 329 00:16:52,096 --> 00:16:53,831 Ugh. 330 00:16:57,101 --> 00:16:58,702 Ow! 331 00:16:58,735 --> 00:16:59,536 Fuck! 332 00:16:59,569 --> 00:17:00,737 Duck! 333 00:17:00,772 --> 00:17:03,373 You are weirder than normal today. 334 00:17:03,406 --> 00:17:06,043 Pressure of the job application getting to you? 335 00:17:07,577 --> 00:17:09,312 I... 336 00:17:09,613 --> 00:17:12,382 had some weird dreams last night. 337 00:17:12,616 --> 00:17:14,718 You had a sex dream. 338 00:17:15,787 --> 00:17:17,454 No. 339 00:17:19,891 --> 00:17:21,793 Was I in it?- 340 00:17:21,826 --> 00:17:26,496 Only in your dreams would you ever be in my dreams. 341 00:17:32,435 --> 00:17:33,771 Okay. 342 00:17:35,672 --> 00:17:39,509 It was a... little erotic. 343 00:17:40,111 --> 00:17:43,114 I was in bed... 344 00:17:43,147 --> 00:17:47,919 naked, and there was a man... 345 00:17:47,952 --> 00:17:50,453 pressing up against me. 346 00:17:50,487 --> 00:17:52,556 I could feel him... 347 00:17:52,589 --> 00:17:53,925 you know. 348 00:17:53,958 --> 00:17:57,327 I think you're gonna have to spell it out for me. 349 00:17:58,428 --> 00:18:01,766 Well, I guess I just... 350 00:18:02,432 --> 00:18:06,037 feel weird because it is a guy from work. 351 00:18:06,070 --> 00:18:07,839 Ooh! 352 00:18:07,872 --> 00:18:08,906 Hot date guy? 353 00:18:08,940 --> 00:18:10,473 As a matter of fact... 354 00:18:10,507 --> 00:18:13,343 Am I gonna have to notify HR? 355 00:18:15,679 --> 00:18:16,613 ...because of what we did. 356 00:18:16,646 --> 00:18:17,882 We are drowning in remainders! 357 00:18:17,915 --> 00:18:20,650 We have more remainders of that insipid sports memoir than we do 358 00:18:20,684 --> 00:18:21,853 of Jocelyn's book! 359 00:18:21,886 --> 00:18:24,055 Because we print more because they actually make money. 360 00:18:24,088 --> 00:18:26,791 Because God forbid we actually invest in something artistically 361 00:18:26,824 --> 00:18:27,657 worthwhile! 362 00:18:27,691 --> 00:18:28,926 You know what your problem is, Helen? 363 00:18:28,960 --> 00:18:30,761 You think it's below you to give people what they actually want. 364 00:18:30,795 --> 00:18:31,295 Me? 365 00:18:31,329 --> 00:18:32,662 I don't give a shit! 366 00:18:32,696 --> 00:18:34,497 People want a book on donkey farts, 367 00:18:34,531 --> 00:18:36,666 I'll ride the donkey all the way to the bank! 368 00:18:36,700 --> 00:18:38,903 This is what I get for selling my soul to Mephistopheles. 369 00:18:38,936 --> 00:18:39,804 Who?! 370 00:18:39,837 --> 00:18:42,405 Read a book, Bexley! 371 00:18:46,878 --> 00:18:48,378 Fuck! 372 00:18:49,013 --> 00:18:50,480 So... 373 00:18:51,048 --> 00:18:53,951 when are where is this supposed date going to happen? 374 00:18:53,985 --> 00:18:56,553 You are very interested. 375 00:18:56,586 --> 00:18:57,755 Why is that? 376 00:18:57,788 --> 00:19:00,657 Well, studies show when a manager feigns interest in his 377 00:19:00,690 --> 00:19:03,861 employees' personal lives, it boosts morale. 378 00:19:04,061 --> 00:19:06,163 That, and I think you're lying. 379 00:19:06,663 --> 00:19:09,867 I am meeting him for drinks at the AC at seven, 380 00:19:09,901 --> 00:19:12,569 and you will never be my boss. 381 00:19:12,602 --> 00:19:13,971 Well, what a coincidence? 382 00:19:14,005 --> 00:19:16,506 I'm going to the AC tonight... 383 00:19:16,539 --> 00:19:17,674 at seven. 384 00:19:17,707 --> 00:19:20,077 Fan-tastic. 385 00:19:20,878 --> 00:19:22,847 I will see you there. 386 00:19:33,190 --> 00:19:34,591 - Hey! - Oh! 387 00:19:34,624 --> 00:19:36,227 Sorry, I should wear a bell. 388 00:19:36,260 --> 00:19:38,029 Like a cow. 389 00:19:38,062 --> 00:19:39,696 You're not like a cow. 390 00:19:39,729 --> 00:19:41,065 I'm gonna stop talking. 391 00:19:41,098 --> 00:19:42,699 - Hi. - Wait... 392 00:19:42,732 --> 00:19:44,001 Are you moving offices? 393 00:19:44,035 --> 00:19:47,038 Um, just doing a little pre-packing, you know? 394 00:19:47,071 --> 00:19:49,006 Organizing my ducks. 395 00:19:49,040 --> 00:19:49,941 Boop! 396 00:19:49,974 --> 00:19:50,841 What? 397 00:19:50,875 --> 00:19:52,009 No, you're leaving? 398 00:19:52,043 --> 00:19:53,677 Starting my own company. 399 00:19:53,710 --> 00:19:55,780 I cannot believe we are losing another designer. 400 00:19:55,813 --> 00:19:57,248 Bexley's killing us. 401 00:19:57,281 --> 00:20:00,051 Well, I... I still have another week. 402 00:20:00,084 --> 00:20:02,019 Um... 403 00:20:02,053 --> 00:20:04,889 What... what brings you to the... the Dan Cave? 404 00:20:04,922 --> 00:20:06,523 Actually... 405 00:20:06,556 --> 00:20:09,026 uh, I was wondering... 406 00:20:09,360 --> 00:20:11,062 what you're doing tonight. 407 00:20:11,095 --> 00:20:12,263 Oh. 408 00:20:12,296 --> 00:20:15,900 Uh, well, uh, couple of guys are taking me out on the town to 409 00:20:15,933 --> 00:20:17,268 celebrate my old departure. 410 00:20:17,301 --> 00:20:19,602 But tomorrow, I'm free as a beaver. 411 00:20:19,636 --> 00:20:21,072 - Mm... - That's not an expression. 412 00:20:21,105 --> 00:20:23,573 Yeah, no, I... I'm gonna be swamped this weekend, 413 00:20:23,606 --> 00:20:26,609 and actually, all of next week and the next week with this... 414 00:20:26,643 --> 00:20:28,645 this thing... 415 00:20:28,678 --> 00:20:30,881 for, uh, cats. 416 00:20:30,915 --> 00:20:33,084 Orphaned rescue cats. 417 00:20:33,117 --> 00:20:34,085 Orphaned? 418 00:20:34,118 --> 00:20:35,319 Yes, correct. 419 00:20:35,353 --> 00:20:36,586 It's kind of a big deal and I don't really know when I'm gonna 420 00:20:36,619 --> 00:20:39,090 be available again, so tonight is actually the only night I'm 421 00:20:39,123 --> 00:20:42,927 available for, like, a really long time, so... 422 00:20:42,960 --> 00:20:46,097 All right, I mean, I'll... switch things around, 423 00:20:46,130 --> 00:20:47,131 you know? 424 00:20:47,932 --> 00:20:49,967 It's for the cats. 425 00:20:51,601 --> 00:20:52,837 Great. 426 00:20:52,870 --> 00:20:54,305 Awesome, you are the best. 427 00:20:54,338 --> 00:20:55,006 You're the best. 428 00:20:55,039 --> 00:20:55,572 Oh! 429 00:20:55,605 --> 00:20:57,074 The AC, seven o'clock. 430 00:20:57,108 --> 00:20:58,209 I'll see ya there. 431 00:20:58,242 --> 00:20:59,944 See ya there! 432 00:21:01,611 --> 00:21:03,014 Ow. 433 00:21:37,882 --> 00:21:40,017 I hate Lucy. 434 00:21:41,718 --> 00:21:43,954 Die, Lucy, die? 435 00:21:53,330 --> 00:21:54,899 What the hell? 436 00:21:56,100 --> 00:21:56,599 You too. 437 00:21:56,633 --> 00:21:58,335 Have a good weekend. 438 00:22:03,841 --> 00:22:05,843 Were you just at my desk? 439 00:22:05,876 --> 00:22:08,112 Thought I saw a spider. 440 00:22:08,345 --> 00:22:10,081 Hm. 441 00:22:15,219 --> 00:22:17,788 What were you really doing at my desk? 442 00:22:18,289 --> 00:22:20,758 Like I said, spider. 443 00:22:20,791 --> 00:22:21,992 Hm. 444 00:22:30,067 --> 00:22:31,168 You know what, Joshua? 445 00:22:31,202 --> 00:22:32,303 You are so... 446 00:22:32,336 --> 00:22:33,070 Sharp? 447 00:22:33,104 --> 00:22:34,038 Intelligent? 448 00:22:34,071 --> 00:22:35,206 Superior in every way? 449 00:22:35,239 --> 00:22:36,739 Predictable. 450 00:22:38,275 --> 00:22:39,676 Still going on your date? 451 00:22:39,709 --> 00:22:41,412 Yup, and I should probably get going. 452 00:22:41,445 --> 00:22:43,781 You know, you should start with the virtues of the menstrual 453 00:22:43,814 --> 00:22:44,315 cup. 454 00:22:44,348 --> 00:22:45,549 Guys love that. 455 00:22:45,583 --> 00:22:48,819 Yeah, I just thought I'd tell him I'm not wearing any panties. 456 00:22:49,253 --> 00:22:50,988 Do guys like that? 457 00:22:57,995 --> 00:22:59,430 Do you need a ride? 458 00:22:59,463 --> 00:23:01,731 No, I will walk. 459 00:23:01,765 --> 00:23:03,000 But it's pouring. 460 00:23:03,033 --> 00:23:05,369 I wouldn't want your makeup to smear after you just spent 22 461 00:23:05,402 --> 00:23:07,905 minutes on it in the bathroom. 462 00:23:07,938 --> 00:23:10,107 Has anyone ever told you that you have stalker-like 463 00:23:10,141 --> 00:23:11,175 tendencies? 464 00:23:11,208 --> 00:23:13,210 Oh, so says the girl with the serial killer eyes? 465 00:23:13,244 --> 00:23:16,679 Yeah, only when I imagine strangling you. 466 00:23:22,153 --> 00:23:23,787 What? 467 00:23:23,988 --> 00:23:26,157 Calm down, I'm not actually gonna strangle you. 468 00:23:26,190 --> 00:23:28,125 What are we doing? 469 00:23:29,293 --> 00:23:31,162 What do you mean? 470 00:23:31,195 --> 00:23:32,763 This. 471 00:23:32,796 --> 00:23:35,766 This schoolyard game that we play everyday. 472 00:23:37,301 --> 00:23:40,104 You mean the game where we hate each other? 473 00:23:41,172 --> 00:23:43,774 Do you really hate me? 474 00:24:14,471 --> 00:24:16,473 Everything all right in there? 475 00:24:17,908 --> 00:24:19,310 Sorry. 476 00:24:19,709 --> 00:24:21,912 Just bumped the button. 477 00:24:43,334 --> 00:24:45,336 So am I just taking you home, or...? 478 00:24:45,369 --> 00:24:46,770 No. 479 00:24:47,371 --> 00:24:49,073 I need to go meet Danny still. 480 00:24:49,106 --> 00:24:50,307 What are you talking about? 481 00:24:50,341 --> 00:24:53,911 My date that you are driving me to. 482 00:24:53,944 --> 00:24:56,780 Well, I... I thought... 483 00:24:57,381 --> 00:24:58,482 But Danny? 484 00:24:58,515 --> 00:25:00,217 Look, will you just pull over? 485 00:25:00,251 --> 00:25:01,285 We're still a block away from the bar. 486 00:25:01,318 --> 00:25:03,053 Yeah, I know, I really wanna get out of the car. 487 00:25:03,087 --> 00:25:04,888 Oh... 488 00:25:06,223 --> 00:25:08,025 Hold on, just... 489 00:25:08,058 --> 00:25:09,026 Hey, just wait a second! 490 00:25:09,059 --> 00:25:10,961 Take my umbrell...! 491 00:25:13,364 --> 00:25:15,566 Thing is, Harris, if this were an authentic log cabin, 492 00:25:15,599 --> 00:25:17,935 what you have to do is notch it out up here, 493 00:25:17,968 --> 00:25:21,071 and then probably go with a classic A-frame for aesthetic 494 00:25:21,105 --> 00:25:22,306 and stability. 495 00:25:22,339 --> 00:25:24,275 - Hi! - Hey! 496 00:25:24,308 --> 00:25:25,175 I'm so sorry I'm late. 497 00:25:25,209 --> 00:25:28,078 It is biblically torrential out there. 498 00:25:28,112 --> 00:25:29,346 Huh. 499 00:25:29,380 --> 00:25:31,348 I look like I tried to fight off a tsunami. 500 00:25:31,382 --> 00:25:33,217 You look great wet. 501 00:25:33,417 --> 00:25:36,920 I... I mean you look really beautiful. 502 00:25:36,954 --> 00:25:38,088 I'm really bad at this. 503 00:25:38,122 --> 00:25:40,357 I'll have a Johnny Black, neat. 504 00:25:40,391 --> 00:25:42,359 Bailey's, rocks. 505 00:25:44,295 --> 00:25:45,596 Rough day? 506 00:25:45,629 --> 00:25:47,364 Strange day. 507 00:25:47,731 --> 00:25:50,034 Oh, 'Stripping Time!' 508 00:25:50,067 --> 00:25:51,368 'Stripping Time, ' you're reading it. 509 00:25:51,402 --> 00:25:52,536 What do you think? 510 00:25:52,569 --> 00:25:54,872 You know, they say "Don't judge a book by its cover," 511 00:25:54,905 --> 00:25:58,275 but in this case, they're both God-awful. 512 00:25:59,343 --> 00:26:00,944 Yeah, I know. 513 00:26:00,978 --> 00:26:02,212 I know! 514 00:26:02,246 --> 00:26:04,381 It's like who wants to read 10 pages about the topography of 515 00:26:04,415 --> 00:26:05,616 - Fort Ticonderoga? - Ticonderoga? 516 00:26:05,649 --> 00:26:07,284 Exactly what I thought! 517 00:26:07,318 --> 00:26:09,453 It's genuinely really bad. 518 00:26:10,120 --> 00:26:13,324 Um, will you just... excuse me one second? 519 00:26:13,357 --> 00:26:14,425 Yeah. 520 00:26:18,629 --> 00:26:19,997 Fuck! 521 00:26:20,030 --> 00:26:20,998 Hey, you all right? 522 00:26:21,031 --> 00:26:21,965 I'm fine. 523 00:26:21,999 --> 00:26:23,300 What are you doing here? 524 00:26:23,334 --> 00:26:25,135 You left your purse in my car. 525 00:26:25,169 --> 00:26:27,938 Whatever, you win. 526 00:26:28,539 --> 00:26:30,541 The "Get in the Other Person's Head" game, okay?! 527 00:26:30,574 --> 00:26:33,277 I mean, you somehow Jedi mind tricked me into kissing you when 528 00:26:33,310 --> 00:26:35,412 I should have just slapped your smug face. 529 00:26:35,446 --> 00:26:36,547 It's been a really good day for you. 530 00:26:36,580 --> 00:26:37,414 What? 531 00:26:37,448 --> 00:26:38,282 I made a mistake, okay? 532 00:26:38,315 --> 00:26:40,484 And if you wanna report me to HR or... 533 00:26:40,517 --> 00:26:41,318 What? 534 00:26:41,352 --> 00:26:42,653 That's what you're worried about? 535 00:26:42,686 --> 00:26:43,921 Josh! 536 00:26:43,954 --> 00:26:46,090 A man just called me "beautiful" and my first thought is to think 537 00:26:46,123 --> 00:26:47,458 that he's messing with me. 538 00:26:47,491 --> 00:26:48,125 Okay? 539 00:26:48,158 --> 00:26:48,692 I feel like I'm going crazy. 540 00:26:48,726 --> 00:26:50,861 So just please go home. 541 00:26:54,465 --> 00:26:56,300 All right, what can I get you? 542 00:27:01,705 --> 00:27:03,040 Hey. 543 00:27:03,073 --> 00:27:04,341 Hey! 544 00:27:05,142 --> 00:27:06,276 Cheers. 545 00:27:07,611 --> 00:27:09,446 All right. 546 00:27:10,514 --> 00:27:13,117 Hey, did I just see Josh? 547 00:27:13,150 --> 00:27:14,218 Uh, oh! 548 00:27:14,251 --> 00:27:16,587 Yeah, I... I left work with a file that he needed. 549 00:27:16,620 --> 00:27:19,323 But don't worry, he is gone. 550 00:27:19,656 --> 00:27:22,059 Hey, so are you and he, like... 551 00:27:22,092 --> 00:27:23,227 I don't know. 552 00:27:23,260 --> 00:27:25,529 I just can't help but feel like there's like a vibe there. 553 00:27:25,562 --> 00:27:26,230 Uh-uh. 554 00:27:26,263 --> 00:27:27,598 - You two? - Uh-uh. 555 00:27:27,631 --> 00:27:28,532 No, no, no. 556 00:27:28,565 --> 00:27:29,600 No vibe. 557 00:27:29,633 --> 00:27:31,402 No vibe there. 558 00:27:31,435 --> 00:27:32,269 Cool, cool, cool. 559 00:27:32,302 --> 00:27:35,205 So, like, this is a real date, then? 560 00:27:35,239 --> 00:27:36,640 I mean, it is, right? 561 00:27:36,673 --> 00:27:38,142 Yeah. 562 00:27:38,175 --> 00:27:39,710 It is definitely real. 563 00:27:39,743 --> 00:27:41,378 Awesome. 564 00:27:41,412 --> 00:27:43,213 So, where are you from? 565 00:27:43,247 --> 00:27:44,181 Vermont. 566 00:27:44,214 --> 00:27:46,517 Green Mountain State, Ethan Allen. 567 00:27:46,550 --> 00:27:48,051 That's right. 568 00:27:48,085 --> 00:27:50,387 Yeah, my parents are strawberry farmers. 569 00:27:50,421 --> 00:27:51,221 What?! 570 00:27:51,255 --> 00:27:53,624 My parents have a hobby farm, too! 571 00:27:53,657 --> 00:27:55,459 I'm talkin' bees, goats, chickens, 572 00:27:55,492 --> 00:27:56,527 the whole thing! 573 00:27:56,560 --> 00:27:57,394 Wait, are you serious? 574 00:27:57,428 --> 00:27:58,228 I am serious. 575 00:27:58,262 --> 00:27:59,663 How did I not know this about you? 576 00:27:59,696 --> 00:28:00,564 I don't know. 577 00:28:00,597 --> 00:28:02,332 But we got Karen and Sharon the sheep, 578 00:28:02,366 --> 00:28:05,335 we got Percy Pig, we got Bonito the queen bee, 579 00:28:05,369 --> 00:28:06,403 and we got Phillip the goat. 580 00:28:06,437 --> 00:28:08,005 You know about goat parkour? 581 00:28:08,038 --> 00:28:09,273 Goat parkour? 582 00:28:09,306 --> 00:28:10,441 - That's correct. - No. 583 00:28:10,474 --> 00:28:11,542 It's the greatest thing you've ever seen in your life. 584 00:28:11,575 --> 00:28:14,178 So Phillip jumps off of any surface pulling this, 585 00:28:14,211 --> 00:28:15,412 like, radical move where he's like, 586 00:28:15,446 --> 00:28:16,613 "Psych, I'm a goat!" 587 00:28:16,647 --> 00:28:18,382 It's the best thing in the w... I have to show it to you. 588 00:28:18,415 --> 00:28:20,350 Do you have pictures? 589 00:28:20,584 --> 00:28:23,220 I don't, actually. 590 00:28:24,455 --> 00:28:26,056 - Sorry. - It's okay. 591 00:28:26,089 --> 00:28:27,524 Yeah, a third of all our food actually comes from 592 00:28:27,558 --> 00:28:28,760 bee-pollinated plants. 593 00:28:28,793 --> 00:28:30,360 - Wow! - Which is... yeah, it's shocking. 594 00:28:30,394 --> 00:28:31,595 - I didn't know that. - Really, so... 595 00:28:31,628 --> 00:28:34,531 Okay, so wait, wait, do you have to wear one of those bee 596 00:28:34,565 --> 00:28:35,699 suits? 597 00:28:35,732 --> 00:28:39,670 To me honest, I'm like Macaulay Culkin in 'My Girl'-level 598 00:28:39,703 --> 00:28:42,506 allergic to bees, so every time I go home, 599 00:28:42,539 --> 00:28:44,741 I have to carry, like, an EpiPen. 600 00:28:44,776 --> 00:28:45,576 No! 601 00:28:45,609 --> 00:28:48,145 Oh, that's so nerdy, I love that. 602 00:28:48,178 --> 00:28:51,114 Says the girl who read 'War and Peace' in the sixth grade! 603 00:28:51,148 --> 00:28:52,549 No, I said I tried. 604 00:28:52,583 --> 00:28:54,418 And that doesn't make me a nerd, okay? 605 00:28:54,451 --> 00:28:56,320 That just makes me precocious. 606 00:28:56,353 --> 00:28:59,089 No, see, that's just nerd talk for bein' a nerd. 607 00:28:59,122 --> 00:29:00,424 No, it's not. 608 00:29:00,457 --> 00:29:01,458 Embrace it. 609 00:29:29,353 --> 00:29:30,654 Hi, who is it? 610 00:29:30,687 --> 00:29:32,289 Delivery for Lucy Hutton. 611 00:29:32,322 --> 00:29:33,357 Oh, okay. 612 00:29:33,390 --> 00:29:34,491 Come on in. 613 00:29:38,362 --> 00:29:39,730 - Thank you. - Have a nice day. 614 00:29:39,764 --> 00:29:41,532 You too. 615 00:30:32,716 --> 00:30:34,585 Lucy? 616 00:30:35,586 --> 00:30:37,254 I'm very sorry. 617 00:30:37,287 --> 00:30:40,424 So sorry you forgot to shower this morning? 618 00:30:41,258 --> 00:30:44,394 Can we please lay down our weapons? 619 00:30:47,932 --> 00:30:50,367 Yeah, okay. 620 00:30:50,768 --> 00:30:52,603 Cease fire. 621 00:30:58,943 --> 00:31:00,677 - Packin' some heat? - Yeah. 622 00:31:01,278 --> 00:31:02,847 I... 623 00:31:03,580 --> 00:31:05,382 come strapped. 624 00:31:06,383 --> 00:31:08,552 Okay, now let's just... 625 00:31:08,585 --> 00:31:11,622 never speak about it again, okay? 626 00:31:17,728 --> 00:31:20,197 So, how was your date? 627 00:31:20,230 --> 00:31:21,598 It was fine. 628 00:31:22,100 --> 00:31:23,567 Yeah, he actually sent me flowers, 629 00:31:23,600 --> 00:31:26,737 which I thought was a very classy move. 630 00:31:26,771 --> 00:31:28,806 Turns out we have a lot in common. 631 00:31:29,239 --> 00:31:30,407 He's really nice. 632 00:31:30,440 --> 00:31:34,578 Mm, yeah, the allure of the nice guy: your white whale. 633 00:31:34,611 --> 00:31:35,512 What's wrong with nice? 634 00:31:35,545 --> 00:31:37,314 Nothing, if that's what you want. 635 00:31:37,347 --> 00:31:38,682 Isn't that what everybody wants? 636 00:31:38,715 --> 00:31:40,617 So it seems. 637 00:31:42,954 --> 00:31:45,757 So, what game should we play now? 638 00:31:45,790 --> 00:31:47,591 I don't know. 639 00:31:47,624 --> 00:31:49,593 How about something where we don't fight all the time? 640 00:31:49,626 --> 00:31:50,427 Oh! 641 00:31:50,460 --> 00:31:51,395 Like the "Normal Colleagues" game. 642 00:31:51,428 --> 00:31:53,330 It would go like this: Good morning, Josh. 643 00:31:53,363 --> 00:31:54,398 Why, good morning, Lucy. 644 00:31:54,431 --> 00:31:55,099 How was your weekend? 645 00:31:55,133 --> 00:31:56,299 Oh, it was lovely, thank you. 646 00:31:56,333 --> 00:31:58,602 Oh, I'll be working on the Walker book today if you need 647 00:31:58,635 --> 00:31:59,436 any help. 648 00:31:59,469 --> 00:32:00,138 Oh, my gosh! 649 00:32:00,170 --> 00:32:01,939 That's so cooperative of you! 650 00:32:01,973 --> 00:32:04,274 You're very welcome, Lucy. 651 00:32:07,277 --> 00:32:08,079 Pfff. 652 00:32:08,112 --> 00:32:09,781 Okay, well, I'll take that as a no. 653 00:32:09,814 --> 00:32:12,749 Lucy, can we talk about your team-building proposal? 654 00:32:12,784 --> 00:32:14,018 Sure. 655 00:32:14,052 --> 00:32:15,419 I booked the conference center and I'm organizing a scavenger 656 00:32:15,452 --> 00:32:16,420 hunt. 657 00:32:16,453 --> 00:32:18,722 I made these tiny books, put little clues inside. 658 00:32:18,756 --> 00:32:20,323 I was kind of inspired by 'Gulliver's Travels'... 659 00:32:20,357 --> 00:32:22,259 you know, Lilliputian books and... 660 00:32:24,796 --> 00:32:26,630 I'm sorry, do you have a better idea? 661 00:32:26,663 --> 00:32:29,366 Well, as a matter of fact, I submitted a proposal of my own. 662 00:32:29,399 --> 00:32:30,267 You did what? 663 00:32:30,300 --> 00:32:31,002 Paintball. 664 00:32:31,035 --> 00:32:32,904 Physical activity, fresh air. 665 00:32:32,937 --> 00:32:34,806 And you come strapped, right? 666 00:32:34,839 --> 00:32:35,807 No. 667 00:32:35,840 --> 00:32:36,740 That sounds like a lawsuit waiting to happen. 668 00:32:36,774 --> 00:32:39,676 I felt the same way, but Bexley loved it. 669 00:32:39,710 --> 00:32:40,912 Hell yeah, I love it. 670 00:32:40,945 --> 00:32:43,815 Let everyone work out their issues with guns and ammo like 671 00:32:43,848 --> 00:32:45,783 God the Almighty intended. 672 00:32:45,817 --> 00:32:48,452 We flipped a coin and we're going with paintball. 673 00:32:48,485 --> 00:32:51,488 I'm sorry, Lucy, I know how hard you worked on this. 674 00:32:52,990 --> 00:32:55,559 Son of a bitch! 675 00:32:57,862 --> 00:32:59,764 You just couldn't let me have this, could you? 676 00:32:59,797 --> 00:33:00,932 Could you?! 677 00:33:03,901 --> 00:33:04,701 No problem! 678 00:33:04,735 --> 00:33:06,536 I mean, put down the books, nerds. 679 00:33:06,570 --> 00:33:08,405 Guns are the new... 680 00:33:09,573 --> 00:33:11,708 Whatever's best for B&G, so... 681 00:33:12,009 --> 00:33:14,344 Um, if you would just excuse me a minute. 682 00:33:16,881 --> 00:33:18,582 Tinkerbell on the rag? 683 00:33:18,615 --> 00:33:19,683 Ugh! 684 00:33:19,716 --> 00:33:20,818 Bad date. 685 00:33:33,998 --> 00:33:36,399 Mack attack, ready for battle. 686 00:33:36,433 --> 00:33:37,701 Carl, don't look so scared. 687 00:33:37,734 --> 00:33:38,735 Annabelle! 688 00:33:38,770 --> 00:33:40,637 - Nice muffs. - Thanks! 689 00:33:41,738 --> 00:33:43,875 What was that you were saying about everybody hating me? 690 00:33:43,908 --> 00:33:46,978 And yet, here I am, leading a day of team-building. 691 00:33:47,011 --> 00:33:49,046 Well, bully for you. 692 00:33:49,147 --> 00:33:49,847 Oh! 693 00:33:49,881 --> 00:33:50,882 Luce, cute outfit. 694 00:33:50,915 --> 00:33:51,849 Oh. 695 00:33:51,883 --> 00:33:53,450 Look, I need a tiny favor. 696 00:33:53,483 --> 00:33:54,384 Okay. 697 00:33:54,417 --> 00:33:55,887 My boyfriend's niece is having a rough time: 698 00:33:55,920 --> 00:33:57,889 drugs, illegal stuff, there's an arson thing. 699 00:33:57,922 --> 00:33:59,791 But her mom thinks an internship would do her good. 700 00:33:59,824 --> 00:34:01,859 No, I... I don't think now's a good time for... 701 00:34:01,893 --> 00:34:03,761 Look, I don't wanna beg, but I'm totally gonna beg. 702 00:34:03,795 --> 00:34:05,362 You're the only one that can deal with her. 703 00:34:05,395 --> 00:34:06,030 Well... 704 00:34:06,063 --> 00:34:07,430 Just a couple months, okay? 705 00:34:07,464 --> 00:34:08,632 - Thank you so much! - No... 706 00:34:08,665 --> 00:34:09,499 You know what? 707 00:34:09,533 --> 00:34:10,367 - I'm gonna text her right now. - Oh... 708 00:34:10,400 --> 00:34:11,701 - You are absolutely the best. - No... 709 00:34:11,735 --> 00:34:13,037 Luce, the best. 710 00:34:13,070 --> 00:34:14,872 Oh, my God... 711 00:34:14,906 --> 00:34:16,774 Uh, hey, Luce, I've got this friend and he's looking for a 712 00:34:16,808 --> 00:34:17,875 - new roommate. - Will you shut up? 713 00:34:17,909 --> 00:34:19,543 You think you'd wanna move in with him? 714 00:34:19,576 --> 00:34:20,710 Hey! 715 00:34:20,744 --> 00:34:21,946 Oh! 716 00:34:21,979 --> 00:34:23,613 Pretty fancy gun you got. 717 00:34:23,647 --> 00:34:25,917 JP Splatmaster 1000. 718 00:34:25,950 --> 00:34:27,885 This puppy goes 200 yards... 719 00:34:27,919 --> 00:34:29,653 no ball chop. 720 00:34:30,154 --> 00:34:31,388 Hey, you wanna be teammates? 721 00:34:31,421 --> 00:34:31,956 Yes. 722 00:34:31,989 --> 00:34:33,925 Teams are pre-selected. 723 00:34:33,958 --> 00:34:35,092 All right. 724 00:34:35,126 --> 00:34:37,494 You know, if they're pre-selected. 725 00:34:37,962 --> 00:34:39,729 See ya out there. 726 00:34:39,764 --> 00:34:41,498 Oh, sorry. 727 00:34:42,599 --> 00:34:44,467 - Nice one, Danny. - Helmet. 728 00:34:44,501 --> 00:34:46,137 Guy's a walking catastrophe. 729 00:34:46,170 --> 00:34:48,840 Okay, easy, Tiger, it's his last day. 730 00:34:48,873 --> 00:34:50,473 You look pale. 731 00:34:50,942 --> 00:34:52,143 N... what are you doing?! 732 00:34:52,176 --> 00:34:53,743 You're burnin' up, Shortcake. 733 00:34:53,778 --> 00:34:56,047 I do not know anyone by that name. 734 00:34:56,080 --> 00:34:57,614 You sure you don't wanna sit this one out? 735 00:34:57,647 --> 00:34:58,615 Oh, no. 736 00:34:58,648 --> 00:35:00,051 No, I am not going anywhere. 737 00:35:00,084 --> 00:35:03,420 I am gonna be right here, all up in your grill, 738 00:35:03,453 --> 00:35:04,956 like a Fourth of July picnic. 739 00:35:04,989 --> 00:35:07,758 I am going to annihilate you. 740 00:35:08,159 --> 00:35:10,560 We're on the same team. 741 00:35:11,829 --> 00:35:12,997 Fuck. 742 00:35:15,099 --> 00:35:16,499 All right, listen up! 743 00:35:16,533 --> 00:35:18,836 It's gonna be two teams, orange versus blue, 744 00:35:18,870 --> 00:35:20,670 capture the flag. 745 00:35:20,704 --> 00:35:21,538 Let's go! 746 00:35:21,571 --> 00:35:22,773 Lucy, move out! 747 00:35:22,807 --> 00:35:24,775 Go, go, go, go, go! 748 00:35:25,709 --> 00:35:26,344 Hey, move! 749 00:35:26,376 --> 00:35:28,045 Take down Templeman! 750 00:35:29,679 --> 00:35:30,815 Let's go! 751 00:35:30,848 --> 00:35:31,816 To the right! 752 00:35:31,849 --> 00:35:32,950 Go, go, go, go! 753 00:35:32,984 --> 00:35:34,018 Watch out! 754 00:35:34,218 --> 00:35:35,853 Parkour! 755 00:35:37,587 --> 00:35:38,189 What?! 756 00:35:38,222 --> 00:35:39,957 Don't you go dying on me! 757 00:35:39,991 --> 00:35:40,958 Hi, Danny. 758 00:35:40,992 --> 00:35:41,759 Fall back! 759 00:35:41,792 --> 00:35:42,626 Get the hell out of here! 760 00:35:42,659 --> 00:35:44,962 You guys, Templeman's in the camper! 761 00:35:44,996 --> 00:35:46,163 Ah, shit. 762 00:35:46,197 --> 00:35:47,798 Save yourselves! 763 00:35:47,832 --> 00:35:49,901 Come on, orange team! 764 00:35:49,934 --> 00:35:51,401 Move! 765 00:35:51,869 --> 00:35:53,503 Move up! 766 00:35:53,838 --> 00:35:54,638 Okay, team. 767 00:35:54,671 --> 00:35:56,007 What's the plan? 768 00:35:56,040 --> 00:35:56,941 Wait for my signal. 769 00:35:56,974 --> 00:35:57,875 Wait, what? 770 00:35:57,909 --> 00:35:59,576 What's the signal? 771 00:36:03,513 --> 00:36:04,982 Okay, I'll cover you. 772 00:36:05,016 --> 00:36:06,851 Worry about yourself, GI Joe. 773 00:36:06,884 --> 00:36:08,753 The sniper's got us pinned down. 774 00:36:08,786 --> 00:36:09,987 I got this, Lucy! 775 00:36:10,021 --> 00:36:10,855 What is she doing?! 776 00:36:10,888 --> 00:36:12,823 I didn't signal! 777 00:36:12,857 --> 00:36:14,759 Here comes the pain! 778 00:36:14,959 --> 00:36:16,593 You like that?! 779 00:36:17,028 --> 00:36:19,562 Ahh! 780 00:36:19,596 --> 00:36:22,499 Suck my paintballs, bitches! 781 00:36:22,532 --> 00:36:23,868 Lucy, I did it! 782 00:36:23,901 --> 00:36:25,069 Ow! 783 00:36:25,102 --> 00:36:26,971 Son of a bitch! 784 00:36:27,004 --> 00:36:29,606 Who shoots someone in the back? 785 00:36:29,639 --> 00:36:31,508 I knew I should've gone with the Splatmaster. 786 00:36:31,541 --> 00:36:33,576 Aw, poor Danny. 787 00:36:34,477 --> 00:36:37,081 Mother of dragons, that hurt! 788 00:36:37,114 --> 00:36:38,082 Seriously?! 789 00:36:38,115 --> 00:36:39,683 I'm already out! 790 00:36:39,716 --> 00:36:41,018 Sorry. 791 00:36:41,052 --> 00:36:42,253 Was that really necessary? 792 00:36:42,286 --> 00:36:44,822 All's fair in love and war. 793 00:36:45,056 --> 00:36:45,923 Okay. 794 00:36:45,957 --> 00:36:47,557 I'm gonna make a run for it. 795 00:36:47,590 --> 00:36:48,725 And let you get all the glory? 796 00:36:48,759 --> 00:36:49,626 Hell no, Templeman. 797 00:36:49,659 --> 00:36:51,996 Better act quick, then, Shortcake. 798 00:36:57,734 --> 00:36:59,070 - Come here! - What are you doing?! 799 00:36:59,103 --> 00:37:01,906 You never bring cupcakes! 800 00:37:01,939 --> 00:37:03,707 We're on the same team! 801 00:37:03,740 --> 00:37:04,708 Get off! 802 00:37:04,741 --> 00:37:06,743 Go, Lucy, go! 803 00:37:18,688 --> 00:37:20,257 - Stay down. - What are you doing? 804 00:37:20,291 --> 00:37:22,159 Get off me! 805 00:37:25,528 --> 00:37:27,898 Total domination! 806 00:37:27,932 --> 00:37:29,100 You hurt her! 807 00:37:29,133 --> 00:37:29,967 Oh, my God. 808 00:37:30,001 --> 00:37:31,135 Lucy, I'm sorry, I got carried away. 809 00:37:31,168 --> 00:37:32,003 Stop. 810 00:37:32,036 --> 00:37:33,137 Stop it. 811 00:37:33,170 --> 00:37:34,305 Ugh, get this thing off me. 812 00:37:34,338 --> 00:37:35,605 It's like a million degrees. 813 00:37:35,638 --> 00:37:36,807 Luce, you're sweating. 814 00:37:36,841 --> 00:37:37,775 Oh, my God, is it internal bleeding? 815 00:37:37,808 --> 00:37:38,876 Is she gonna die? 816 00:37:38,909 --> 00:37:40,643 No, she doesn't have a fever because you shot her, 817 00:37:40,677 --> 00:37:41,278 you dick. 818 00:37:41,312 --> 00:37:42,213 Are you okay? 819 00:37:42,246 --> 00:37:43,080 She's fine. 820 00:37:43,114 --> 00:37:44,614 No, I'm fine, don't worry... 821 00:37:44,647 --> 00:37:47,118 - Okay, all right. - Oh, God. 822 00:37:47,151 --> 00:37:48,085 Let's get you up. 823 00:37:48,119 --> 00:37:49,686 Come on, time to go home. 824 00:37:49,719 --> 00:37:52,023 Yeah, paintball's over. 825 00:37:54,091 --> 00:37:56,060 I'm sorry. 826 00:37:58,162 --> 00:38:00,297 All right, here you go. 827 00:38:08,172 --> 00:38:10,107 What are you doing here? 828 00:38:10,141 --> 00:38:11,776 I drove you home. 829 00:38:11,809 --> 00:38:12,276 No, I know. 830 00:38:12,309 --> 00:38:13,344 Why are you... 831 00:38:13,377 --> 00:38:15,079 standing in my apartment right now? 832 00:38:15,112 --> 00:38:16,213 What do you think I was gonna do, 833 00:38:16,247 --> 00:38:18,282 just open the door and kick you out of a moving car? 834 00:38:18,315 --> 00:38:20,017 I'm... fine. 835 00:38:20,051 --> 00:38:21,651 Yeah, okay. 836 00:38:21,684 --> 00:38:22,619 You gonna be sick? 837 00:38:22,652 --> 00:38:25,823 Okay, bathroom, go, go, go, go. 838 00:38:27,091 --> 00:38:28,292 There you go. 839 00:38:28,325 --> 00:38:30,761 Yeah. 840 00:38:31,028 --> 00:38:31,996 Ugh. 841 00:38:33,764 --> 00:38:37,001 Oh, the humanity. 842 00:38:37,034 --> 00:38:38,769 Okay. 843 00:39:37,828 --> 00:39:39,096 Ow. 844 00:39:39,130 --> 00:39:40,397 Sorry. 845 00:39:42,199 --> 00:39:43,834 Ugh. 846 00:39:48,305 --> 00:39:50,774 - Still alive in there? - Yeah. 847 00:39:50,808 --> 00:39:52,376 All right, sit up. 848 00:39:52,877 --> 00:39:54,912 Time to take your temp. 849 00:40:00,251 --> 00:40:01,919 Open up, Rambo. 850 00:40:01,952 --> 00:40:03,754 There you go. 851 00:40:05,022 --> 00:40:07,224 You're in my bedroom. 852 00:40:09,293 --> 00:40:11,095 I'm wearing Sleepysaurus. 853 00:40:11,128 --> 00:40:12,830 Try not to talk, Shortcake. 854 00:40:12,863 --> 00:40:15,132 I know that's hard for you. 855 00:40:17,768 --> 00:40:19,336 Here we go. 856 00:40:20,237 --> 00:40:21,172 102.8. 857 00:40:21,205 --> 00:40:24,808 Ooh, that's not very nice, Mr. Thermometer. 858 00:40:27,278 --> 00:40:29,280 Are you laughing? 859 00:40:30,281 --> 00:40:33,017 Oh, I must be hallucinating. 860 00:40:33,284 --> 00:40:34,451 Sit tight. 861 00:40:34,485 --> 00:40:36,287 I'll be back. 862 00:40:42,326 --> 00:40:44,161 No, there's two of you. 863 00:40:44,195 --> 00:40:48,199 Josh must have gotten wet after midnight. 864 00:40:49,833 --> 00:40:51,302 - Lucy? - Mm. 865 00:40:51,335 --> 00:40:51,835 I'm a doctor. 866 00:40:51,869 --> 00:40:53,103 How are you feeling? 867 00:40:53,137 --> 00:40:54,138 Not so good. 868 00:40:54,171 --> 00:40:56,207 She's got a fever of 103. 869 00:40:56,607 --> 00:40:58,242 All right, let's sit you up. 870 00:40:58,275 --> 00:40:59,810 Okay. 871 00:41:07,251 --> 00:41:09,820 You are really handsome. 872 00:41:09,853 --> 00:41:11,822 Thank you. 873 00:41:11,855 --> 00:41:15,192 People always say Josh is the good-looking one. 874 00:41:15,559 --> 00:41:18,162 Oh, you're his brother. 875 00:41:18,195 --> 00:41:21,198 Oh, you must've wanted to beat him up so much when you were a 876 00:41:21,232 --> 00:41:23,234 kid. 877 00:41:23,267 --> 00:41:24,068 I like her. 878 00:41:24,101 --> 00:41:25,202 Oh, she's very special. 879 00:41:25,236 --> 00:41:27,004 Wait, can you tell me embarrassing things about him? 880 00:41:27,037 --> 00:41:28,539 You must know all the best stuff. 881 00:41:28,572 --> 00:41:30,341 Well, um... 882 00:41:30,374 --> 00:41:32,042 He used to dress up like a dog... 883 00:41:32,076 --> 00:41:33,110 No... 884 00:41:33,143 --> 00:41:34,311 Make our mom walk him around the block. 885 00:41:34,345 --> 00:41:36,914 Oh, my God, this is the best day of my life. 886 00:41:36,947 --> 00:41:38,515 I was a kid, thank you. 887 00:41:38,549 --> 00:41:39,550 He was 12. 888 00:41:39,583 --> 00:41:40,184 No! 889 00:41:40,217 --> 00:41:41,418 Oh, Josh, that's too old. 890 00:41:41,452 --> 00:41:43,921 All right, thank you very much for the house call, Doctor. 891 00:41:43,954 --> 00:41:45,256 Time to go. 892 00:41:45,289 --> 00:41:47,057 Laughter's the best medicine, right? 893 00:41:51,362 --> 00:41:53,264 No... 894 00:41:53,731 --> 00:41:55,966 You did all the right things. 895 00:41:56,533 --> 00:41:58,235 You would've been good at this. 896 00:41:59,069 --> 00:42:02,106 I'm not trying to be a dick, come on. 897 00:42:02,406 --> 00:42:04,408 I'm just saying, you did good. 898 00:42:07,244 --> 00:42:09,246 So... 899 00:42:09,280 --> 00:42:11,415 you ever gonna RSVP? 900 00:42:11,448 --> 00:42:14,351 It's just that, you know, Mindy and I need a final head count. 901 00:42:14,385 --> 00:42:16,420 Yeah, yeah, uh... 902 00:42:16,453 --> 00:42:18,188 I've just been slammed at work. 903 00:42:18,222 --> 00:42:19,390 Sorry. 904 00:42:19,790 --> 00:42:21,492 Look, man... 905 00:42:21,525 --> 00:42:23,961 it's awkward, I get it. 906 00:42:23,994 --> 00:42:27,131 But when your brother gets married, you show up. 907 00:42:27,164 --> 00:42:28,232 Bring a plus one. 908 00:42:28,265 --> 00:42:30,234 Oh yeah, right, 'cause that's what we need: 909 00:42:30,267 --> 00:42:33,570 more witnesses to our absurd family drama. 910 00:42:34,104 --> 00:42:36,173 Keep her fluids up. 911 00:42:37,241 --> 00:42:39,943 Call me if the fever gets worse. 912 00:42:40,277 --> 00:42:41,111 Thank you, Pat. 913 00:42:41,145 --> 00:42:43,113 Thank you, little brother. 914 00:42:50,321 --> 00:42:52,856 - How are we doin'? - Hey. 915 00:42:53,257 --> 00:42:55,359 I brought you a little water. 916 00:42:57,594 --> 00:42:59,296 N... I'm not a baby. 917 00:42:59,330 --> 00:43:00,631 You already broke two glasses earlier, 918 00:43:00,664 --> 00:43:03,367 so better safe than sorry. 919 00:43:04,034 --> 00:43:06,036 There you go. 920 00:43:07,504 --> 00:43:09,573 My mom always gave me strawberry juice when I was 921 00:43:09,606 --> 00:43:11,308 sick. 922 00:43:11,675 --> 00:43:12,777 What did yours do? 923 00:43:12,811 --> 00:43:15,946 Oh, they were always too busy treating other people. 924 00:43:15,979 --> 00:43:17,247 If you weren't in cardiac arrest, 925 00:43:17,281 --> 00:43:20,017 your ailment didn't exactly rank. 926 00:43:20,050 --> 00:43:21,485 Is your whole family doctors? 927 00:43:21,518 --> 00:43:23,287 And surgeons. 928 00:43:23,654 --> 00:43:25,389 Except me. 929 00:43:27,458 --> 00:43:30,194 Has anyone ever told you that you look like a young Dennis 930 00:43:30,227 --> 00:43:31,195 Quaid? 931 00:43:32,396 --> 00:43:34,365 I think it's time to take your temp again, Shortcake. 932 00:43:34,398 --> 00:43:36,200 No, stop calling me that. 933 00:43:36,233 --> 00:43:37,668 Oh, not a chance. 934 00:43:37,701 --> 00:43:40,204 Watching you pretend to hate that nickname is the best part 935 00:43:40,237 --> 00:43:41,872 of my day. 936 00:43:42,172 --> 00:43:44,174 You changed shirts. 937 00:43:44,408 --> 00:43:46,477 You look like an Old Navy model. 938 00:43:46,510 --> 00:43:48,045 My brother brought it for me. 939 00:43:48,078 --> 00:43:49,980 You puked on the other one, remember? 940 00:43:50,013 --> 00:43:51,982 - Oh, yeah. - Mm. 941 00:43:52,883 --> 00:43:57,988 Dove gray, white, powder blue, window pane, true blue. 942 00:43:58,021 --> 00:44:00,290 - What's that? - Your shirts. 943 00:44:00,324 --> 00:44:03,327 Always in the same order. 944 00:44:04,628 --> 00:44:07,131 I guess I am that predictable. 945 00:44:07,164 --> 00:44:09,700 Yeah, you only surprised me once. 946 00:44:09,733 --> 00:44:12,436 - When was that? - The elevator. 947 00:44:13,337 --> 00:44:15,172 And... 948 00:44:15,205 --> 00:44:17,241 what did you think about that? 949 00:44:20,411 --> 00:44:23,347 Yeah, I thought it was really hot. 950 00:44:30,354 --> 00:44:32,389 Are we playing the staring game? 951 00:44:32,423 --> 00:44:34,391 It's my favorite. 952 00:44:35,526 --> 00:44:38,362 I like the way you look at me. 953 00:44:41,698 --> 00:44:43,967 Get some rest. 954 00:45:02,453 --> 00:45:03,554 Josh? 955 00:45:03,587 --> 00:45:06,457 Oh, she lives! 956 00:45:07,224 --> 00:45:09,460 Why are you cleaning my apartment? 957 00:45:09,493 --> 00:45:10,694 Oh, actually, I didn't clean it. 958 00:45:10,727 --> 00:45:12,729 I demoed the whole thing and rebuilt it from the ground up 959 00:45:12,764 --> 00:45:14,031 with a team of elves. 960 00:45:14,064 --> 00:45:15,165 Figured it was easier. 961 00:45:15,199 --> 00:45:18,135 Okay, just 'cause I'm not turned on by the smell of 962 00:45:18,168 --> 00:45:19,303 cleaning supplies... 963 00:45:19,336 --> 00:45:21,605 Weird, that doesn't sound like "Thank you"... 964 00:45:21,638 --> 00:45:23,207 - No... - But you're very welcome. 965 00:45:23,240 --> 00:45:24,074 Thank you. 966 00:45:24,107 --> 00:45:25,542 Seriously, thank you for everything. 967 00:45:25,576 --> 00:45:27,544 But just... would you... stop, stop. 968 00:45:27,578 --> 00:45:28,111 This is weird. 969 00:45:28,145 --> 00:45:30,013 This is way too weird. 970 00:45:30,280 --> 00:45:32,784 Oh, and if you use any of this against me... 971 00:45:32,817 --> 00:45:36,086 Oh, right, because knowing the consistency of your vomit's 972 00:45:36,119 --> 00:45:37,588 really gonna give me a competitive edge. 973 00:45:37,621 --> 00:45:38,622 No, Josh, stop. 974 00:45:38,655 --> 00:45:39,757 No, I get it, it's fine. 975 00:45:39,791 --> 00:45:42,559 My brother left a prescription for you on the table. 976 00:45:42,593 --> 00:45:44,294 See you at the office. 977 00:45:51,803 --> 00:45:53,437 Shit. 978 00:45:57,641 --> 00:45:59,142 Did you know daisies are found on every continent 979 00:45:59,176 --> 00:46:01,612 except Antartica-arctica? 980 00:46:01,645 --> 00:46:03,113 Oh, gotta go. 981 00:46:03,146 --> 00:46:04,147 Lucy! 982 00:46:04,181 --> 00:46:05,516 Hi! 983 00:46:05,549 --> 00:46:06,483 What are you doing here? 984 00:46:06,517 --> 00:46:08,519 I got you these. 985 00:46:08,820 --> 00:46:09,653 Always with the flowers. 986 00:46:09,686 --> 00:46:11,121 You're very sweet. 987 00:46:11,154 --> 00:46:12,356 How are you feeling? 988 00:46:12,389 --> 00:46:15,359 Like my body survived a violent alien abduction. 989 00:46:15,392 --> 00:46:18,161 Fun fact about alien abductions: not violent. 990 00:46:18,195 --> 00:46:20,631 They get a bad rep 'cause of all the probe stuff but my personal 991 00:46:20,664 --> 00:46:22,800 feelings are that aliens are actually people from, 992 00:46:22,834 --> 00:46:25,435 like, a million years from now just checkin' in on their 993 00:46:25,469 --> 00:46:26,603 ancestors. 994 00:46:26,637 --> 00:46:27,839 I don't know if you've read Nick Bostrom's 'Simulation 995 00:46:27,872 --> 00:46:30,607 Hypothesis, ' but if you build a quantum computer the size of a 996 00:46:30,641 --> 00:46:31,508 planet... 997 00:46:33,878 --> 00:46:34,979 And after you. 998 00:46:35,013 --> 00:46:35,947 If you think about the exponential rate of computing 999 00:46:35,980 --> 00:46:39,149 power alone from, like, 40 years ago 'til now, 1000 00:46:39,182 --> 00:46:41,786 and then you do that from, like, 4,000 years or four million 1001 00:46:41,819 --> 00:46:44,555 years, there's basically no way we're not aliens. 1002 00:46:45,589 --> 00:46:46,523 That's... that's cool. 1003 00:46:46,557 --> 00:46:47,759 - It's crazy, right? - Yeah. 1004 00:46:49,994 --> 00:46:52,429 Hey, so you wanna get dinner tonight? 1005 00:46:53,363 --> 00:46:54,264 Maybe. 1006 00:46:54,298 --> 00:46:56,533 I'll... I'll have to see how I'm feeling. 1007 00:46:57,001 --> 00:46:58,803 Hey, JTT! 1008 00:46:58,836 --> 00:47:00,237 Temple-man. 1009 00:47:00,270 --> 00:47:01,806 What's up, dude bro? 1010 00:47:01,839 --> 00:47:03,640 You don't work here anymore. 1011 00:47:03,674 --> 00:47:04,776 Yeah. 1012 00:47:04,809 --> 00:47:06,577 Just checkin' in on my girl. 1013 00:47:06,610 --> 00:47:08,645 The old Lucy Goose. 1014 00:47:08,679 --> 00:47:11,248 Lucille Ball 'n' Chain. 1015 00:47:11,281 --> 00:47:14,518 Lucy in the Sky with Danny. 1016 00:47:16,353 --> 00:47:17,621 Wow. 1017 00:47:17,654 --> 00:47:18,790 Okay. 1018 00:47:18,823 --> 00:47:20,758 No vibe, huh? 1019 00:47:22,292 --> 00:47:23,226 Lucy? 1020 00:47:23,260 --> 00:47:24,896 Can you come see me when you get settled? 1021 00:47:24,929 --> 00:47:26,697 Yeah, yeah, just one second. 1022 00:47:26,730 --> 00:47:29,099 - Um... - Guess that's my cue. 1023 00:47:29,934 --> 00:47:31,201 Oh. 1024 00:47:31,234 --> 00:47:32,070 Thanks. 1025 00:47:32,102 --> 00:47:33,570 - Yeah, I'll email you. - Okay. 1026 00:47:33,604 --> 00:47:35,439 Cool, cool, cool, cool. 1027 00:47:37,307 --> 00:47:38,475 Oh. 1028 00:47:42,780 --> 00:47:44,548 Strawberry juice. 1029 00:47:50,621 --> 00:47:53,290 You sent the roses. 1030 00:47:58,595 --> 00:48:00,664 Joshua Templeman. 1031 00:48:01,598 --> 00:48:02,934 Yes, I'll be right there. 1032 00:48:02,967 --> 00:48:04,501 Thank you. 1033 00:48:06,336 --> 00:48:08,505 Glad you're feeling better. 1034 00:48:10,741 --> 00:48:12,342 Crap. 1035 00:48:17,581 --> 00:48:18,448 Oh. 1036 00:48:18,482 --> 00:48:20,751 I saw you submitted your application. 1037 00:48:20,785 --> 00:48:21,886 I know, it's a long-shot. 1038 00:48:21,919 --> 00:48:23,253 Are you kidding me? 1039 00:48:23,286 --> 00:48:25,322 I'm counting on you getting this job. 1040 00:48:25,355 --> 00:48:27,624 We can't let Bexley turn this place into some kind of... 1041 00:48:27,658 --> 00:48:28,960 Commercial shit house? 1042 00:48:28,993 --> 00:48:31,261 I was gonna say "factory." 1043 00:48:31,294 --> 00:48:32,096 But yeah. 1044 00:48:32,130 --> 00:48:33,898 Josh submitted his application too. 1045 00:48:33,931 --> 00:48:34,766 I know. 1046 00:48:34,799 --> 00:48:37,401 His Harvard MBA won't hurt his chances. 1047 00:48:37,434 --> 00:48:39,871 I have a Master's in Victorian Lit. 1048 00:48:39,904 --> 00:48:40,737 Does that count? 1049 00:48:40,772 --> 00:48:42,239 For me, it does. 1050 00:48:42,272 --> 00:48:44,508 Not so much for the money people. 1051 00:48:44,541 --> 00:48:47,244 There are a lot of good candidates, Lucy. 1052 00:48:47,277 --> 00:48:48,980 Will you be honest with me? 1053 00:48:49,013 --> 00:48:50,180 How much of a shot do I have? 1054 00:48:50,213 --> 00:48:52,582 Because I really want this job and I... I need to prepare 1055 00:48:52,616 --> 00:48:53,283 myself... 1056 00:48:53,316 --> 00:48:55,285 Don't underestimate yourself. 1057 00:48:55,318 --> 00:48:58,622 You already coordinate every department on my behalf. 1058 00:48:58,655 --> 00:49:00,657 You know this company from the bottom up. 1059 00:49:00,691 --> 00:49:02,292 You have fantastic instincts. 1060 00:49:02,325 --> 00:49:03,795 Frankly... 1061 00:49:03,828 --> 00:49:07,364 I should have promoted you to editorial years ago. 1062 00:49:07,664 --> 00:49:10,333 Why didn't you? 1063 00:49:10,968 --> 00:49:13,670 You never asked. 1064 00:49:13,905 --> 00:49:17,374 And I rely on you to do the parts of my job that I hate 1065 00:49:17,407 --> 00:49:22,412 doing, which is why you'd make a great managing director. 1066 00:49:31,989 --> 00:49:33,991 I'm trying to say thank you. 1067 00:49:34,025 --> 00:49:34,792 No need. 1068 00:49:34,826 --> 00:49:36,393 You helped me, okay? 1069 00:49:36,426 --> 00:49:37,294 And I owe you a favor. 1070 00:49:37,327 --> 00:49:38,228 What can I do for you? 1071 00:49:38,261 --> 00:49:39,362 I will clean your apartment. 1072 00:49:39,396 --> 00:49:40,597 I will bake you a cake. 1073 00:49:40,630 --> 00:49:42,532 I will... I will go with you to your brother's wedding and I 1074 00:49:42,566 --> 00:49:43,734 will be your designated driver. 1075 00:49:43,768 --> 00:49:46,838 You can get shit-faced drunk and I will clean up your vomit. 1076 00:49:46,871 --> 00:49:48,106 How do you know about that? 1077 00:49:48,139 --> 00:49:50,407 Because I overheard you in my kitchen and I know you need a 1078 00:49:50,440 --> 00:49:50,942 plus one. 1079 00:49:50,975 --> 00:49:52,309 Are you mad at me? 1080 00:49:52,342 --> 00:49:54,344 I'm not mad at you, I'm just busy. 1081 00:49:54,377 --> 00:49:56,747 My God, Lucinda, can I please get a moment alone? 1082 00:49:56,781 --> 00:49:57,447 No. 1083 00:49:57,481 --> 00:49:58,582 Not until you say we're even. 1084 00:49:58,615 --> 00:50:00,617 What do you mean "even?" 1085 00:50:04,889 --> 00:50:05,790 This is cozy. 1086 00:50:05,823 --> 00:50:07,724 Just say that I can take you to the wedding. 1087 00:50:07,759 --> 00:50:08,592 Is that what you want? 1088 00:50:08,625 --> 00:50:10,494 No, what I want is to stop fighting. 1089 00:50:10,527 --> 00:50:12,596 I want just a tiny sliver of peace in my daily life. 1090 00:50:12,629 --> 00:50:14,564 And to die very slowly of boredom. 1091 00:50:14,598 --> 00:50:16,733 Oh, no, I won't be bored, I'll have this fantastic new job to 1092 00:50:16,768 --> 00:50:17,769 keep me occupied. 1093 00:50:17,802 --> 00:50:18,702 You're not getting the job. 1094 00:50:18,735 --> 00:50:19,904 No! 1095 00:50:26,844 --> 00:50:29,279 Put your hands on me. 1096 00:50:30,882 --> 00:50:33,383 You can put them on yourself. 1097 00:50:41,025 --> 00:50:42,659 Kiss me. 1098 00:50:45,662 --> 00:50:47,697 Do me a favor? 1099 00:50:47,899 --> 00:50:49,566 What? 1100 00:50:50,734 --> 00:50:53,637 Go to dinner with Danny and kiss him. 1101 00:50:54,638 --> 00:50:55,873 What? 1102 00:50:55,907 --> 00:50:56,974 Why? 1103 00:50:57,008 --> 00:50:59,643 If it's better than our elevator kiss, then fine. 1104 00:50:59,676 --> 00:51:01,045 - But if it's not... - What is with you? 1105 00:51:01,078 --> 00:51:03,881 I... I don't wanna be some experiment before you settle 1106 00:51:03,915 --> 00:51:05,783 down with Mr. Right. 1107 00:51:06,516 --> 00:51:10,054 And I'm not gonna put my hands on you again unless you tell me 1108 00:51:10,087 --> 00:51:13,356 that nobody kisses you like I do. 1109 00:51:20,497 --> 00:51:23,134 Wow, this view is... it's incredible! 1110 00:51:23,167 --> 00:51:24,936 This is very romantic. 1111 00:51:24,969 --> 00:51:26,670 Well, not just romantic... 1112 00:51:26,703 --> 00:51:27,839 historical. 1113 00:51:27,872 --> 00:51:29,807 Did you know that in the American Revolution, 1114 00:51:29,841 --> 00:51:32,109 the British used to keep prisoners of war on a boat in 1115 00:51:32,143 --> 00:51:33,476 the East River? 1116 00:51:33,510 --> 00:51:35,813 And like 12,000 of them died. 1117 00:51:35,847 --> 00:51:37,447 And they didn't know what to do with the bodies, 1118 00:51:37,480 --> 00:51:39,683 so they just dumped them overboard. 1119 00:51:39,716 --> 00:51:41,685 I mean, literally picture that in your mind. 1120 00:51:41,718 --> 00:51:43,486 Oh, I am. 1121 00:51:43,520 --> 00:51:45,923 So, anyway, how's business going? 1122 00:51:45,957 --> 00:51:47,424 Yeah... 1123 00:51:47,457 --> 00:51:48,658 it's going all right. 1124 00:51:48,692 --> 00:51:51,595 I've got like four clients and pitching two more this week. 1125 00:51:51,628 --> 00:51:53,496 And, you know, if you get that promoshe... 1126 00:51:53,530 --> 00:51:55,532 Yes, I will definitely keep you in mind. 1127 00:51:55,565 --> 00:51:57,101 I, uh, got something for you. 1128 00:51:57,134 --> 00:51:58,803 Danny, that's so thoughtful! 1129 00:51:58,836 --> 00:52:00,805 ♪ Check this out! ♪ 1130 00:52:01,873 --> 00:52:03,074 A business card! 1131 00:52:03,107 --> 00:52:05,709 For all your graphic design needs. 1132 00:52:05,742 --> 00:52:06,543 Thank you. 1133 00:52:06,576 --> 00:52:08,678 Designed it myself. 1134 00:52:09,479 --> 00:52:11,816 Hey, have you ever thought about kissing me? 1135 00:52:11,849 --> 00:52:14,451 Only every day since you spilled coffee on my lap in my 1136 00:52:14,484 --> 00:52:16,486 first staff meeting. 1137 00:52:28,565 --> 00:52:29,532 Wow. 1138 00:52:30,902 --> 00:52:33,871 - Wow, wow. - Yeah. 1139 00:53:00,765 --> 00:53:02,833 Do you think he's home? 1140 00:53:03,566 --> 00:53:04,969 What, are you stalking me, Shortcake? 1141 00:53:05,002 --> 00:53:07,671 Yeah, just went through your garbage, actually. 1142 00:53:07,704 --> 00:53:08,571 - Really? - Mm-hm. 1143 00:53:08,605 --> 00:53:09,506 Find anything interesting? 1144 00:53:09,539 --> 00:53:12,209 You know, the usual stuff: food scraps, 1145 00:53:12,243 --> 00:53:13,945 stiff Kleenex, adult diapers. 1146 00:53:16,113 --> 00:53:17,614 You should always laugh. 1147 00:53:17,647 --> 00:53:20,017 You should always be funny. 1148 00:53:20,051 --> 00:53:21,685 So, how was your date? 1149 00:53:21,718 --> 00:53:25,588 Did he roll the last meatball over to you with his nose? 1150 00:53:26,223 --> 00:53:28,759 - Did you kiss him? - Yeah. 1151 00:53:28,793 --> 00:53:30,593 And? 1152 00:53:30,828 --> 00:53:32,163 And... 1153 00:53:32,196 --> 00:53:36,033 I... am not going to date him anymore. 1154 00:53:36,067 --> 00:53:37,902 Because? 1155 00:53:40,972 --> 00:53:43,941 Because nobody kisses me like you do. 1156 00:53:48,745 --> 00:53:49,947 Mm. 1157 00:53:51,315 --> 00:53:53,750 Oh, my God. 1158 00:53:53,784 --> 00:53:55,052 What? 1159 00:53:55,086 --> 00:53:57,855 That sound you just made. 1160 00:54:03,995 --> 00:54:06,596 Hey, are you gonna invite me inside? 1161 00:54:06,629 --> 00:54:07,264 I mean, it's only fair. 1162 00:54:07,298 --> 00:54:09,767 I showed you mine. 1163 00:54:14,105 --> 00:54:16,073 Wow. 1164 00:54:16,107 --> 00:54:18,075 I really like it. 1165 00:54:18,641 --> 00:54:21,946 I halfway expected you to live underground, 1166 00:54:21,979 --> 00:54:24,048 near the Earth's core. 1167 00:54:24,081 --> 00:54:26,083 You wanna snoop? 1168 00:54:26,117 --> 00:54:27,318 No. 1169 00:54:27,351 --> 00:54:28,252 You wanna snoop. 1170 00:54:28,285 --> 00:54:29,353 I snooped at your place. 1171 00:54:29,387 --> 00:54:31,856 Yeah, that's 'cause my place is like a flea market 1172 00:54:31,889 --> 00:54:33,758 compared to this. 1173 00:54:33,791 --> 00:54:35,226 Where's all your junk? 1174 00:54:35,259 --> 00:54:37,795 I like a clean space. 1175 00:54:38,396 --> 00:54:41,032 I... kinda thought once you got me up here, 1176 00:54:41,065 --> 00:54:43,000 you were gonna ravish me. 1177 00:54:43,034 --> 00:54:45,336 I'm making you a tea instead. 1178 00:54:45,369 --> 00:54:47,972 How about something stronger? 1179 00:54:53,177 --> 00:54:56,013 I like your matchbox car collection. 1180 00:54:56,047 --> 00:54:59,582 It's like you were an actual child once. 1181 00:55:05,389 --> 00:55:06,824 Wait... 1182 00:55:06,857 --> 00:55:09,860 you don't have a single Bexley book here. 1183 00:55:10,494 --> 00:55:13,696 Oh, my God, you are a Gamin. 1184 00:55:13,730 --> 00:55:17,001 I'm not a Gamin, I just prefer Gamin books. 1185 00:55:17,034 --> 00:55:20,071 You are such a Gamin. 1186 00:55:24,041 --> 00:55:27,278 Oh, you really like to read about dicks. 1187 00:55:27,311 --> 00:55:29,612 Well, knowledge is power. 1188 00:55:30,014 --> 00:55:33,250 No, actually, I went to medical school for a year. 1189 00:55:33,750 --> 00:55:36,887 Oh, my God, that's why Bexley calls you "Dr. Josh." 1190 00:55:36,921 --> 00:55:41,025 To remind me of my failure to live up to my potential. 1191 00:55:46,430 --> 00:55:47,932 - Ooh. - Hm. 1192 00:55:47,965 --> 00:55:49,166 You know... 1193 00:55:49,200 --> 00:55:53,304 if you were a doctor, all of your lady patients would have 1194 00:55:53,337 --> 00:55:55,072 astronomical heart rates. 1195 00:55:55,106 --> 00:55:55,906 Mm. 1196 00:55:55,940 --> 00:55:57,408 Well, let's test that theory, huh? 1197 00:55:57,441 --> 00:55:58,576 Mm-hm. 1198 00:55:58,608 --> 00:56:01,879 Imagine I'm sliding a stethoscope inside your shirt. 1199 00:56:01,912 --> 00:56:02,947 Ooh. 1200 00:56:02,980 --> 00:56:04,348 Giving me a new kink. 1201 00:56:04,381 --> 00:56:07,184 Pounding heart, raging case of horny. 1202 00:56:07,218 --> 00:56:09,386 I... I think your condition may be serious. 1203 00:56:09,420 --> 00:56:10,855 Will I die? 1204 00:56:10,888 --> 00:56:12,356 A few days in bed should cure it. 1205 00:56:12,389 --> 00:56:15,126 Oh, my gosh, I wanna see your bedroom. 1206 00:56:19,930 --> 00:56:22,933 Oh, I love the color. 1207 00:56:22,967 --> 00:56:25,803 It's Benjamin Moore Calypso Green. 1208 00:56:25,836 --> 00:56:28,072 Very specific.- 1209 00:56:35,745 --> 00:56:37,148 C'mere. 1210 00:56:46,290 --> 00:56:47,791 The copycat game. 1211 00:56:47,825 --> 00:56:49,692 Classic. 1212 00:56:51,862 --> 00:56:53,964 Truth or dare. 1213 00:56:54,431 --> 00:56:55,266 Truth. 1214 00:56:55,299 --> 00:56:57,234 Aw, I was kinda hoping you'd say "Dare." 1215 00:56:57,268 --> 00:56:59,770 I'm sorry to disappoint. 1216 00:57:00,404 --> 00:57:03,240 Why did you quit med school? 1217 00:57:03,274 --> 00:57:06,143 After two semesters, my dad though it'd be a good idea for 1218 00:57:06,177 --> 00:57:08,245 me to spend a day in the coroner's wing. 1219 00:57:08,279 --> 00:57:09,180 Mm. 1220 00:57:09,213 --> 00:57:10,747 Five minutes in... 1221 00:57:10,781 --> 00:57:12,983 I puked inside a dead guy's stomach. 1222 00:57:13,017 --> 00:57:15,319 Oh, my God, I would still be having nightmares. 1223 00:57:19,023 --> 00:57:21,458 Okay, so what's this muscle called? 1224 00:57:21,492 --> 00:57:23,093 Brachioradialis. 1225 00:57:23,127 --> 00:57:24,295 Mm. 1226 00:57:24,328 --> 00:57:26,197 And this? 1227 00:57:26,230 --> 00:57:28,799 Anterior deltoid. 1228 00:57:28,832 --> 00:57:30,301 What about this one? 1229 00:57:30,334 --> 00:57:31,135 Biceps. 1230 00:57:31,168 --> 00:57:33,971 Oh, yeah, I knew that. 1231 00:57:34,004 --> 00:57:35,272 - Oh, but what about this one? - Oh! 1232 00:57:42,213 --> 00:57:43,746 Hi. 1233 00:57:44,815 --> 00:57:46,150 Hi. 1234 00:57:54,491 --> 00:57:56,927 You taste like candy. 1235 00:58:01,265 --> 00:58:03,467 Oh, my God, please remind me to write a thank you note to your 1236 00:58:03,500 --> 00:58:04,535 personal trainer. 1237 00:58:05,436 --> 00:58:07,538 I do spend a lot of time in the gym. 1238 00:58:07,571 --> 00:58:10,975 Being forced to look at you for eight hours a day leaves me with 1239 00:58:11,008 --> 00:58:13,477 a lot of excess energy I have to work off. 1240 00:58:13,510 --> 00:58:15,312 Well, I... 1241 00:58:15,346 --> 00:58:17,181 can help you burn some calories. 1242 00:58:17,214 --> 00:58:18,182 - Oh, really? - Mm-hm. 1243 00:58:18,215 --> 00:58:19,283 How would you do that? 1244 00:58:19,316 --> 00:58:22,353 Well, I'm thinking we should play a very special game. 1245 00:58:22,386 --> 00:58:24,922 It's called "Who Can Make the Other Come First?" 1246 00:58:26,190 --> 00:58:27,391 - Okay. - Seriously, Josh. 1247 00:58:27,424 --> 00:58:29,326 I just think we should have sex and just get it out of our 1248 00:58:29,360 --> 00:58:30,494 - system. - Right. 1249 00:58:30,527 --> 00:58:32,930 And then, we can go back to normal without all this... 1250 00:58:32,963 --> 00:58:34,898 crazy sexual tension. 1251 00:58:38,135 --> 00:58:39,903 All right, Shortcake. 1252 00:58:39,937 --> 00:58:41,972 I think it's getting late. 1253 00:58:44,575 --> 00:58:46,343 What? 1254 00:58:47,578 --> 00:58:50,281 Wh... but I just offered you sex. 1255 00:58:50,314 --> 00:58:52,283 And, like, very enthusiastic sex. 1256 00:58:52,316 --> 00:58:53,217 And I appreciate it. 1257 00:58:53,250 --> 00:58:54,218 Maybe some other time. 1258 00:58:54,251 --> 00:58:56,353 Maybe some other time? 1259 00:58:56,387 --> 00:58:58,222 That's what you say when you turn down a muffin, 1260 00:58:58,255 --> 00:58:59,923 not sex. 1261 00:59:00,124 --> 00:59:01,325 Is this about the job? 1262 00:59:01,358 --> 00:59:04,061 Yeah, it probably is unwise to sleep with the competition. 1263 00:59:04,094 --> 00:59:06,196 Right, get me to beg for sex and then kick me out of your 1264 00:59:06,230 --> 00:59:06,765 apartment. 1265 00:59:06,797 --> 00:59:07,631 Nice move, Templeman. 1266 00:59:07,665 --> 00:59:10,067 - You were begging? - That's not funny. 1267 00:59:10,100 --> 00:59:11,135 Are you toying with me? 1268 00:59:11,168 --> 00:59:12,603 I think you're the one playing games here, Luce. 1269 00:59:12,636 --> 00:59:13,971 All right, well, whatever this is, 1270 00:59:14,004 --> 00:59:16,273 I don't wanna do it anymore. 1271 00:59:37,461 --> 00:59:38,395 Morning. 1272 00:59:38,429 --> 00:59:40,097 Morning. 1273 00:59:41,365 --> 00:59:43,100 How'd you sleep? 1274 00:59:43,133 --> 00:59:44,935 Not great. 1275 00:59:46,203 --> 00:59:47,304 - Period? - What? 1276 00:59:47,338 --> 00:59:48,005 No! 1277 00:59:48,038 --> 00:59:49,106 I just... 1278 00:59:49,139 --> 00:59:49,606 Oh. 1279 00:59:49,640 --> 00:59:51,308 No, thanks. 1280 00:59:51,342 --> 00:59:53,210 I already ate. 1281 00:59:54,011 --> 00:59:55,479 This kid is king, I'm telling you. 1282 00:59:55,512 --> 00:59:55,913 Josh! 1283 00:59:55,946 --> 00:59:56,781 There you are. 1284 00:59:56,815 --> 00:59:58,415 I've been looking all over for you. 1285 00:59:58,449 --> 01:00:00,617 I'd like you to meet my good friend Simon. 1286 01:00:00,651 --> 01:00:01,485 Simon Mitchell. 1287 01:00:01,518 --> 01:00:04,288 From Harper Collins. 1288 01:00:04,321 --> 01:00:05,155 I... 1289 01:00:05,189 --> 01:00:06,323 Josh is a Harvard man too, you know. 1290 01:00:06,357 --> 01:00:08,192 Ah, a few decades after me, but the crimson runs deep, 1291 01:00:08,225 --> 01:00:08,959 am I right? 1292 01:00:08,992 --> 01:00:09,660 Roll tide! 1293 01:00:09,693 --> 01:00:10,594 That's Alabama. 1294 01:00:10,627 --> 01:00:12,062 Oh. 1295 01:00:12,329 --> 01:00:14,498 Simon knows half the hiring panel personally. 1296 01:00:14,531 --> 01:00:17,134 I'm sure that he'd be willing to write you one hell of a 1297 01:00:17,167 --> 01:00:18,102 recommendation. 1298 01:00:18,135 --> 01:00:19,002 I'd appreciate that. 1299 01:00:19,036 --> 01:00:20,471 Let's talk about it over lunch. 1300 01:00:20,504 --> 01:00:21,171 I'll clear my schedule. 1301 01:00:21,205 --> 01:00:24,308 Oh, hey, this is Lucy Hinton. 1302 01:00:24,341 --> 01:00:25,576 No, it's Hutton. 1303 01:00:25,609 --> 01:00:26,977 You sure? 1304 01:00:27,010 --> 01:00:29,246 Uh, yeah. 1305 01:00:33,150 --> 01:00:38,188 Yeah, so I thought maybe you could write me a recommendation. 1306 01:00:38,222 --> 01:00:41,425 Yes, it was 10 years ago. 1307 01:00:41,458 --> 01:00:43,527 H-U-T-T-O-N. 1308 01:00:43,560 --> 01:00:47,030 Oh, you know the color-coded filing system? 1309 01:00:47,064 --> 01:00:49,366 I did that. 1310 01:00:49,733 --> 01:00:53,003 No, of course it's digital now. 1311 01:00:53,036 --> 01:00:54,338 Sure. 1312 01:00:54,671 --> 01:00:58,409 Sure, okay, well, if you can remember anything at all, 1313 01:00:58,442 --> 01:00:59,476 I... 1314 01:00:59,510 --> 01:01:00,711 Okay, thank you. 1315 01:01:00,744 --> 01:01:02,379 Bye. 1316 01:01:02,946 --> 01:01:06,049 So I really need to nail this presentation. 1317 01:01:06,083 --> 01:01:08,051 I'm thinking I can probably pay you... 1318 01:01:08,085 --> 01:01:09,319 $300 for the graphics? 1319 01:01:09,353 --> 01:01:10,621 I know that that's not much. 1320 01:01:10,654 --> 01:01:11,856 Sure. 1321 01:01:11,890 --> 01:01:14,491 I'll consider it an investment in the future of our working 1322 01:01:14,525 --> 01:01:16,660 - relationship. - Great. 1323 01:01:17,294 --> 01:01:18,462 Hey, so... 1324 01:01:18,495 --> 01:01:21,565 just to be totally clear, there's no chance for anything 1325 01:01:21,598 --> 01:01:24,401 else, right? 1326 01:01:24,435 --> 01:01:25,536 Yeah. 1327 01:01:25,569 --> 01:01:27,438 Say no more. 1328 01:01:27,806 --> 01:01:29,239 Your loss. 1329 01:01:29,273 --> 01:01:30,707 I'm a world-class cuddler. 1330 01:01:30,741 --> 01:01:33,410 I believe that. 1331 01:01:34,411 --> 01:01:36,079 So, uh... 1332 01:01:36,113 --> 01:01:40,117 you and Dude Man, what's-his-bucket, Josh? 1333 01:01:40,150 --> 01:01:41,718 Still mortal enemies. 1334 01:01:41,752 --> 01:01:42,619 Hm. 1335 01:01:42,653 --> 01:01:43,487 I mean, don't take this the wrong way, 1336 01:01:43,520 --> 01:01:45,589 I just figured y'all would be, like, 1337 01:01:45,622 --> 01:01:47,291 knockin' boots at this point. 1338 01:01:47,324 --> 01:01:50,327 Nope, pistols and swords at dawn. 1339 01:01:50,627 --> 01:01:53,597 Given the choice, I go pistol 100 percent of the time. 1340 01:01:54,565 --> 01:01:57,334 Significantly more effective. 1341 01:02:32,669 --> 01:02:34,571 Yo ho ho. 1342 01:02:34,939 --> 01:02:36,106 Who let you in the building? 1343 01:02:36,139 --> 01:02:39,811 Oh, I scaled the wall using my elite Navy SEAL training. 1344 01:02:39,844 --> 01:02:41,078 The neighbor let me in. 1345 01:02:41,111 --> 01:02:42,079 What are you doing here? 1346 01:02:42,112 --> 01:02:43,580 Picking you up. 1347 01:02:43,781 --> 01:02:44,816 For my brother's wedding? 1348 01:02:46,149 --> 01:02:47,484 Yeah, not likely, Templeman. 1349 01:02:47,518 --> 01:02:48,585 Look, I'm sorry about the other night. 1350 01:02:48,619 --> 01:02:49,453 You caught me off-guard. 1351 01:02:49,486 --> 01:02:52,322 This thing is just too complicated. 1352 01:02:52,356 --> 01:02:53,257 All right? 1353 01:02:53,290 --> 01:02:55,492 We... we are competing for the same job. 1354 01:02:55,526 --> 01:02:57,594 And we've turned mutual sabotage into an art, 1355 01:02:57,628 --> 01:02:59,563 so it is impossible to trust each other. 1356 01:02:59,596 --> 01:03:02,767 Also, you're like the man version of Icy Hot. 1357 01:03:02,800 --> 01:03:03,467 Are you cold? 1358 01:03:03,500 --> 01:03:04,701 Are you warm? 1359 01:03:04,735 --> 01:03:06,737 Is this tingling sensation nice or is it deeply uncomfortable? 1360 01:03:06,771 --> 01:03:07,772 Tingling sensation. 1361 01:03:07,805 --> 01:03:10,240 Okay, you know what I mean. 1362 01:03:11,009 --> 01:03:13,210 Look, I can't go to this thing alone, 1363 01:03:13,243 --> 01:03:15,612 and they're expecting you to come with me. 1364 01:03:15,646 --> 01:03:19,249 And don't forget: you still owe me. 1365 01:03:20,684 --> 01:03:21,786 Mm. 1366 01:03:21,819 --> 01:03:23,554 I'll be in the car. 1367 01:03:26,223 --> 01:03:27,691 Okay, fine. 1368 01:03:35,432 --> 01:03:39,202 Okay, so what do I need to know about your family? 1369 01:03:39,703 --> 01:03:40,838 My mom's great. 1370 01:03:40,872 --> 01:03:43,875 She'll love you and tell you that she wants to keep you 1371 01:03:43,908 --> 01:03:45,509 forever. 1372 01:03:45,542 --> 01:03:48,545 My dad is, uh... 1373 01:03:49,680 --> 01:03:51,381 complicated. 1374 01:03:51,415 --> 01:03:54,151 Last time I was home, we had a fight. 1375 01:03:54,184 --> 01:03:55,319 What about? 1376 01:03:55,352 --> 01:03:56,687 A lot of things. 1377 01:03:56,720 --> 01:03:59,690 My leaving med school ...he won't let that go. 1378 01:03:59,723 --> 01:04:02,259 And my girlfriend had just broken up with me and he and my 1379 01:04:02,292 --> 01:04:05,662 brother were just being assholes about it. 1380 01:04:05,930 --> 01:04:08,532 It's so hard to imagine you with a girlfriend. 1381 01:04:08,565 --> 01:04:11,803 I always pictured you as a swipe right, 1382 01:04:11,836 --> 01:04:15,606 "Let's not put a label on it, babe" kinda guy. 1383 01:04:15,639 --> 01:04:18,642 Well, sometimes you're wrong. 1384 01:04:24,448 --> 01:04:25,549 It's gonna snow. 1385 01:04:25,582 --> 01:04:26,383 How do you know that? 1386 01:04:26,416 --> 01:04:27,250 Because it's a thing. 1387 01:04:27,284 --> 01:04:28,318 I can smell weather. 1388 01:04:28,352 --> 01:04:31,188 Well, that would make you the lamest X-Man ever. 1389 01:04:32,723 --> 01:04:34,524 - Whoa, hi! - How can I help you? 1390 01:04:34,558 --> 01:04:35,292 Joshua Templeman. 1391 01:04:35,325 --> 01:04:36,560 I've got two rooms. 1392 01:04:36,593 --> 01:04:38,228 Templeman. 1393 01:04:38,662 --> 01:04:40,664 - With a T? - Yeah. 1394 01:04:41,866 --> 01:04:43,768 Two Ts? 1395 01:04:43,801 --> 01:04:45,770 Just the one. 1396 01:04:48,605 --> 01:04:49,774 And....sent. 1397 01:04:49,807 --> 01:04:51,608 - Sorry, just sent an email. - Mm-hm. 1398 01:04:51,642 --> 01:04:54,511 - Oh. - Okay, and... 1399 01:04:55,679 --> 01:04:56,848 - I am so sorry. - Hm? 1400 01:04:56,881 --> 01:05:00,250 I, um... I only have one room. 1401 01:05:00,283 --> 01:05:01,251 Now, Jaf? 1402 01:05:01,284 --> 01:05:02,252 Jaffrey. 1403 01:05:02,285 --> 01:05:03,955 My friends call me "Jaf" and... 1404 01:05:03,988 --> 01:05:05,422 - we're not there yet. - Okay. 1405 01:05:05,455 --> 01:05:06,891 Jaffrey, I really need two rooms. 1406 01:05:06,924 --> 01:05:08,625 Can you please help me out? 1407 01:05:08,659 --> 01:05:10,661 Sorry. 1408 01:05:10,694 --> 01:05:13,630 I mean, I need my mom to move out but... 1409 01:05:13,664 --> 01:05:15,499 But I got two weddings this weekend, right? 1410 01:05:15,532 --> 01:05:16,566 I know, we're in one of them. 1411 01:05:17,267 --> 01:05:18,335 Oh... oh, you're the couple? 1412 01:05:18,368 --> 01:05:19,269 Oh, congratulations! 1413 01:05:19,302 --> 01:05:20,404 Oh, no, no, no, no. 1414 01:05:20,437 --> 01:05:22,439 No, no, no, no, it's, uh... it's my brother's wedding, 1415 01:05:22,472 --> 01:05:23,707 we're just here for it. 1416 01:05:23,740 --> 01:05:26,309 Oh, well, I wish I could help you out, 1417 01:05:26,343 --> 01:05:28,679 but think about where I'm coming from on this. 1418 01:05:28,712 --> 01:05:29,546 I've got a lot of people here. 1419 01:05:29,579 --> 01:05:30,213 Okay, just stop, stop, stop. 1420 01:05:30,247 --> 01:05:31,381 - It's fine. - It's not fine. 1421 01:05:31,415 --> 01:05:33,483 It's not worth ruining his day when he clearly can't do 1422 01:05:33,517 --> 01:05:34,152 anything about it. 1423 01:05:34,184 --> 01:05:34,786 Jaffrey, thank you so much. 1424 01:05:34,819 --> 01:05:36,353 We will take the one room. 1425 01:05:36,386 --> 01:05:37,521 Thank you so much. 1426 01:05:37,554 --> 01:05:40,524 She's absolutely right; it is not worth ruining my day. 1427 01:05:40,557 --> 01:05:43,795 Great, um, so you are gonna be in room, 1428 01:05:43,828 --> 01:05:46,697 uh, 216 and, um, no keys. 1429 01:05:46,730 --> 01:05:48,298 Everything's unlocked. 1430 01:05:48,331 --> 01:05:49,700 Oh, boy. 1431 01:05:56,506 --> 01:05:57,975 Wow. 1432 01:05:59,010 --> 01:06:01,545 - It's not bad. - Mm. 1433 01:06:02,113 --> 01:06:04,347 You will sleep there. 1434 01:06:04,381 --> 01:06:05,348 Hah! 1435 01:06:05,382 --> 01:06:07,751 Shoulda made you stay with Jaf and his mom. 1436 01:06:07,785 --> 01:06:10,955 Okay, we've got a half an hour until the rehearsal dinner. 1437 01:06:10,988 --> 01:06:12,355 You want the first shower? 1438 01:06:12,389 --> 01:06:13,791 Sure. 1439 01:06:13,825 --> 01:06:15,525 Great. 1440 01:06:30,074 --> 01:06:32,309 Took you long enough. 1441 01:06:32,342 --> 01:06:34,544 Oh, I was shaving my legs. 1442 01:06:34,578 --> 01:06:35,980 Oh. 1443 01:06:41,085 --> 01:06:43,420 Flamethrower? 1444 01:06:44,387 --> 01:06:46,758 I like red. 1445 01:06:47,624 --> 01:06:48,760 So do I. 1446 01:06:57,534 --> 01:06:59,003 This does not mean we're okay. 1447 01:06:59,036 --> 01:07:00,772 Mm-hm. 1448 01:07:09,412 --> 01:07:10,782 Come here. 1449 01:07:12,582 --> 01:07:14,852 - No, I wanna feel your weight. - No, I'll crush you. 1450 01:07:14,886 --> 01:07:17,822 Well, I have lived a really good life. 1451 01:07:17,855 --> 01:07:19,589 You sure you're okay with this? 1452 01:07:19,623 --> 01:07:20,892 Oh, yeah. 1453 01:07:20,925 --> 01:07:22,026 Let's do it. 1454 01:07:22,059 --> 01:07:24,762 You should write sonnets. 1455 01:07:45,415 --> 01:07:49,020 Oh, best... game... ever. 1456 01:07:50,587 --> 01:07:52,056 Yeah. 1457 01:07:53,423 --> 01:07:54,457 Oh, shit! 1458 01:07:54,491 --> 01:07:55,193 What? 1459 01:07:55,226 --> 01:07:56,761 We are seriously late for dinner. 1460 01:07:56,794 --> 01:07:58,129 Just... just stay here! 1461 01:07:58,162 --> 01:07:59,429 What will your parents think? 1462 01:07:59,462 --> 01:08:01,065 Oh, hi, Mr. and Mrs. Templeman. 1463 01:08:01,098 --> 01:08:02,900 I'm so sorry that we missed your son's rehearsal dinner. 1464 01:08:02,934 --> 01:08:05,036 We were too busy giving each other multiple orgasms. 1465 01:08:06,703 --> 01:08:08,672 I promise you, nobody will care. 1466 01:08:08,705 --> 01:08:11,474 I'll just text them that we hit traffic and we'll see them 1467 01:08:11,508 --> 01:08:12,609 tomorrow at the wedding. 1468 01:08:12,642 --> 01:08:14,078 Yeah, but what if they know we already checked in? 1469 01:08:14,111 --> 01:08:16,479 Why do you care so much what my parents think? 1470 01:08:16,513 --> 01:08:18,983 Well, it's people-pleasing 101: they are people, 1471 01:08:19,016 --> 01:08:20,517 thus I want to please them. 1472 01:08:20,550 --> 01:08:21,685 But why? 1473 01:08:21,718 --> 01:08:23,821 Well, I already explained the totality of that logic. 1474 01:08:23,855 --> 01:08:26,891 Also, why don't you care what people think? 1475 01:08:27,191 --> 01:08:29,693 I learned a long time ago that it's impossible to make people 1476 01:08:29,726 --> 01:08:31,361 like you. 1477 01:08:31,829 --> 01:08:33,130 Yeah. 1478 01:08:33,463 --> 01:08:35,166 I guess you're right, it's not like I'm ever gonna see them 1479 01:08:35,199 --> 01:08:36,834 again. 1480 01:08:38,936 --> 01:08:40,704 God, what are you thinking? 1481 01:08:40,737 --> 01:08:42,706 I just wanna juice your head like a lemon. 1482 01:08:43,975 --> 01:08:46,077 There's no need for violence, Little One. 1483 01:08:46,110 --> 01:08:48,378 What do you wanna know? 1484 01:08:49,646 --> 01:08:52,817 Okay, the other day... 1485 01:08:52,850 --> 01:08:56,753 when you caught me snooping at your desk... 1486 01:08:57,054 --> 01:08:59,957 uh, I saw your planner. 1487 01:08:59,991 --> 01:09:01,859 Questionable ethics, Shortcake. 1488 01:09:01,893 --> 01:09:02,827 Yeah, okay, I know. 1489 01:09:02,860 --> 01:09:06,964 But there was some red marks in the margin. 1490 01:09:06,998 --> 01:09:08,199 Ds, Ss, some Xs. 1491 01:09:08,232 --> 01:09:10,167 What are those? 1492 01:09:11,168 --> 01:09:11,969 What? 1493 01:09:12,904 --> 01:09:13,971 No! 1494 01:09:14,005 --> 01:09:15,840 - Tell me! - No... 1495 01:09:15,873 --> 01:09:18,075 Tell me, tell me, tell me, tell me, tell me. 1496 01:09:21,979 --> 01:09:24,015 D is for "dress." 1497 01:09:24,514 --> 01:09:28,518 P is for "pants," S is for "skirt," and I make a mark when 1498 01:09:28,551 --> 01:09:33,456 we have a fight and X when I wanna kiss you. 1499 01:09:34,158 --> 01:09:36,593 Wow. 1500 01:09:38,628 --> 01:09:41,966 You're like an OCD stalker. 1501 01:09:41,999 --> 01:09:43,000 Your turn. 1502 01:09:43,034 --> 01:09:44,567 My turn what? 1503 01:09:44,601 --> 01:09:46,971 You gotta tell me something I don't know about you. 1504 01:09:47,004 --> 01:09:48,839 Okay. 1505 01:09:50,540 --> 01:09:52,575 Oh... 1506 01:09:52,609 --> 01:09:55,012 When I wore that little black dress to work the other day... 1507 01:09:55,046 --> 01:09:56,914 Mm-hm. 1508 01:09:57,214 --> 01:09:58,748 Well... 1509 01:10:00,117 --> 01:10:02,019 I lied about having a date at the AC. 1510 01:10:02,053 --> 01:10:04,922 I asked Danny out later that day. 1511 01:10:05,156 --> 01:10:06,223 What? 1512 01:10:06,257 --> 01:10:08,926 You were all smug and skeptical and I had just... 1513 01:10:08,960 --> 01:10:11,095 had this super hot sex dream about you. 1514 01:10:11,128 --> 01:10:12,696 I knew it! 1515 01:10:14,198 --> 01:10:15,399 Yeah, and then you said you were going to the bar and I 1516 01:10:15,433 --> 01:10:18,235 didn't want you to think I was a loser just... sitting there all 1517 01:10:18,269 --> 01:10:20,004 alone. 1518 01:10:20,304 --> 01:10:22,739 You wouldn't have been alone. 1519 01:10:22,940 --> 01:10:25,009 You would've been with me. 1520 01:11:00,945 --> 01:11:04,681 Did he make his side of the bed? 1521 01:11:04,714 --> 01:11:06,784 What a freak. 1522 01:11:12,957 --> 01:11:14,557 Very nice. 1523 01:11:16,193 --> 01:11:17,928 Your tie's crooked. 1524 01:11:17,962 --> 01:11:19,130 No, I'm not falling for that again. 1525 01:11:19,163 --> 01:11:20,998 Come here. 1526 01:11:21,032 --> 01:11:22,133 - Really? - Yeah. 1527 01:11:22,166 --> 01:11:23,234 Oh. 1528 01:11:23,267 --> 01:11:24,935 - Thank you. - You're welcome. 1529 01:11:24,969 --> 01:11:25,602 There you go. 1530 01:11:25,635 --> 01:11:26,971 No attempt at strangulation. 1531 01:11:27,004 --> 01:11:29,273 Wow, you are really developing as a person. 1532 01:11:29,306 --> 01:11:32,076 Yeah, well, I need you alive for all the things I'm gonna do 1533 01:11:32,109 --> 01:11:34,145 - to you later. - Hm. 1534 01:11:34,178 --> 01:11:35,645 You look gorgeous in this dress. 1535 01:11:35,678 --> 01:11:36,679 Thank you. 1536 01:11:36,713 --> 01:11:38,581 It matches your eyes. 1537 01:11:38,816 --> 01:11:40,017 Excuse me. 1538 01:11:40,051 --> 01:11:41,718 Josh? 1539 01:11:41,986 --> 01:11:44,889 - Oh, hi, Mom. - You made it! 1540 01:11:44,922 --> 01:11:46,824 - Oh... - Honey... 1541 01:11:46,857 --> 01:11:48,159 Mom, this is Lucy. 1542 01:11:48,192 --> 01:11:49,093 Hi. 1543 01:11:49,126 --> 01:11:50,995 Oh, it is so nice to meet you, Dr. Templeman. 1544 01:11:51,028 --> 01:11:52,629 Oh, Elaine, please. 1545 01:11:52,662 --> 01:11:54,899 I'm so glad to finally meet you. 1546 01:11:54,932 --> 01:11:55,466 You too. 1547 01:11:55,499 --> 01:11:56,699 She is just adorable! 1548 01:11:57,401 --> 01:11:58,803 I'm gonna keep you forever. 1549 01:11:59,937 --> 01:12:00,971 Shall we? 1550 01:12:01,005 --> 01:12:02,273 - You just snorted. - Yeah, I did. 1551 01:12:12,749 --> 01:12:15,052 Wasn't sure you were gonna make it. 1552 01:12:15,086 --> 01:12:18,322 Anthony, this is Josh's friend, Lucy. 1553 01:12:18,355 --> 01:12:19,890 Hi. 1554 01:12:19,924 --> 01:12:21,392 Good afternoon. 1555 01:12:21,425 --> 01:12:23,861 Oh, friendly. 1556 01:12:25,930 --> 01:12:27,798 Aww... 1557 01:12:39,944 --> 01:12:42,379 Aww, cute. 1558 01:12:52,056 --> 01:12:54,758 Wow, she is stunning. 1559 01:12:54,792 --> 01:12:57,194 - Mm. - Nice work, Patrick. 1560 01:13:09,807 --> 01:13:11,142 Oh, my God. 1561 01:13:11,175 --> 01:13:13,277 Patrick's family is driving me crazy. 1562 01:13:13,310 --> 01:13:15,980 And these heels are like a Medieval torture device. 1563 01:13:16,013 --> 01:13:17,381 You wouldn't happen to have a joint, would you? 1564 01:13:17,414 --> 01:13:18,282 Oh, I wish. 1565 01:13:18,315 --> 01:13:18,949 Meth? 1566 01:13:18,983 --> 01:13:19,483 Rat poison? 1567 01:13:19,517 --> 01:13:20,417 I'll take anything. 1568 01:13:20,451 --> 01:13:22,419 Sadly, I am fresh out of rat poison. 1569 01:13:22,453 --> 01:13:24,155 But congratulations. 1570 01:13:24,188 --> 01:13:25,422 Thank you. 1571 01:13:25,456 --> 01:13:27,224 You're Lucy, right? 1572 01:13:27,258 --> 01:13:27,892 Yes. 1573 01:13:27,925 --> 01:13:29,726 I've been dying to meet you. 1574 01:13:29,760 --> 01:13:31,362 Patrick says you're the reason Josh came today. 1575 01:13:31,395 --> 01:13:34,298 Oh, no, I'm sure that's not true. 1576 01:13:34,331 --> 01:13:37,268 Oh, I'm sure it is. 1577 01:13:37,301 --> 01:13:39,837 It really did work out for the best in the end, didn't it? 1578 01:13:39,870 --> 01:13:42,406 I mean, Josh and I were never good together. 1579 01:13:44,275 --> 01:13:46,911 I'm sorry, you were... you were with Josh? 1580 01:13:46,944 --> 01:13:49,980 Oh, my God, how did he not tell you? 1581 01:13:50,014 --> 01:13:52,149 It really wasn't anything serious. 1582 01:13:52,183 --> 01:13:53,417 The entire year we were together, 1583 01:13:53,450 --> 01:13:55,786 I don't think we ever really connected. 1584 01:13:55,819 --> 01:13:57,321 You were together a year? 1585 01:13:57,354 --> 01:13:59,156 Like, a calendar year? 1586 01:13:59,190 --> 01:14:01,392 Like, a full 12 months? 1587 01:14:01,425 --> 01:14:03,227 And then, you and Patrick... 1588 01:14:03,260 --> 01:14:06,764 Were a much better fit in, like, every way. 1589 01:14:06,797 --> 01:14:10,733 I mean, it was a little bit awkward at first, but... 1590 01:14:11,268 --> 01:14:14,271 Um, I'm sorry. 1591 01:14:14,305 --> 01:14:17,041 I should really go say inappropriate things to my other 1592 01:14:17,074 --> 01:14:17,975 guests now. 1593 01:14:18,008 --> 01:14:21,245 No, no, it's... it's, um... it's fine. 1594 01:14:40,464 --> 01:14:42,266 Well, that nose of yours was right on. 1595 01:14:42,299 --> 01:14:44,168 I told you it was a thing. 1596 01:14:46,904 --> 01:14:48,005 Lucy, I hope... 1597 01:14:48,038 --> 01:14:49,173 Is she the reason you brought me here? 1598 01:14:49,206 --> 01:14:50,740 No. 1599 01:14:51,842 --> 01:14:53,544 No, Lucy, it had nothing to do with her. 1600 01:14:53,577 --> 01:14:54,912 But why didn't you tell me? 1601 01:14:54,945 --> 01:14:56,213 I don't know. 1602 01:14:57,014 --> 01:14:59,416 - I was embarrassed. - Why? 1603 01:14:59,817 --> 01:15:01,452 Hey, you did nothing wrong. 1604 01:15:01,485 --> 01:15:04,321 They are the ones that should be embarrassed. 1605 01:15:08,259 --> 01:15:11,362 You know, the weekend that I got my MBA, 1606 01:15:11,395 --> 01:15:15,165 my dad took Patrick fishing with two other surgeons. 1607 01:15:15,432 --> 01:15:17,568 He said that I wasn't invited because I would've felt 1608 01:15:17,601 --> 01:15:19,837 out-of-place. 1609 01:15:19,870 --> 01:15:21,472 Patrick has always been the golden child, 1610 01:15:21,505 --> 01:15:23,841 and so when Mindy left me for him, 1611 01:15:23,874 --> 01:15:25,409 it just... 1612 01:15:27,444 --> 01:15:30,314 So today must really suck for you, huh? 1613 01:15:30,347 --> 01:15:32,283 Well, it could be worse. 1614 01:15:33,417 --> 01:15:35,786 I could be here alone. 1615 01:15:37,288 --> 01:15:38,322 Well... 1616 01:15:38,355 --> 01:15:41,225 this situation most definitely calls for some booze, 1617 01:15:41,258 --> 01:15:43,560 so let's go. 1618 01:15:44,395 --> 01:15:45,095 - I know, just... - No. 1619 01:15:45,129 --> 01:15:45,963 - Yes! - No! 1620 01:15:45,996 --> 01:15:46,797 - Yes. - Darling... 1621 01:15:46,830 --> 01:15:47,464 Just in case you need it. 1622 01:15:47,498 --> 01:15:51,068 You are the absolute worst. 1623 01:15:51,101 --> 01:15:51,635 Ah! 1624 01:15:51,669 --> 01:15:53,037 Where have you two been? 1625 01:15:53,070 --> 01:15:54,405 Outside getting some fresh air. 1626 01:15:54,438 --> 01:15:55,572 Oh. 1627 01:15:55,606 --> 01:15:58,876 Lucy, when you first met Josh... 1628 01:15:58,909 --> 01:15:59,610 what'd you think? 1629 01:15:59,643 --> 01:16:01,245 Ah. 1630 01:16:01,278 --> 01:16:04,982 Well, I thought he was very good-looking, 1631 01:16:05,015 --> 01:16:07,551 cold, domineering, and freakishly uptight. 1632 01:16:07,584 --> 01:16:08,719 Oh. 1633 01:16:08,752 --> 01:16:10,421 I thought that you had to have ambition to be domineering. 1634 01:16:10,454 --> 01:16:11,588 Anthony... 1635 01:16:11,622 --> 01:16:13,257 I'm kidding. 1636 01:16:13,724 --> 01:16:18,429 And I thought Lucy was very smart, 1637 01:16:18,462 --> 01:16:21,398 but she was also a spineless kiss-ass. 1638 01:16:21,432 --> 01:16:23,400 Yeah, it was hate at first sight. 1639 01:16:23,434 --> 01:16:24,301 Mm. 1640 01:16:25,469 --> 01:16:27,304 - Oh. - Dad? 1641 01:16:27,338 --> 01:16:29,106 That's your cue. 1642 01:16:29,139 --> 01:16:30,474 - That's my cue. - Yeah. 1643 01:16:30,507 --> 01:16:32,309 Uh... 1644 01:16:32,343 --> 01:16:36,380 Elaine wrote down a few ideas but... 1645 01:16:37,381 --> 01:16:39,016 I think I'll wing it. 1646 01:16:39,049 --> 01:16:40,417 Ugh... 1647 01:16:41,085 --> 01:16:44,355 I always expected a great deal from my son, 1648 01:16:44,388 --> 01:16:46,924 and he's never disappointed me. 1649 01:16:46,957 --> 01:16:50,928 Excelled in med school and he's become a very fine physician. 1650 01:16:50,961 --> 01:16:53,997 It's been a privilege to watch him grow into the man he is 1651 01:16:54,031 --> 01:16:55,499 today, hm? 1652 01:16:55,532 --> 01:16:58,369 A son a father can be proud of. 1653 01:16:58,969 --> 01:17:01,505 But of all the good decisions that Patrick has 1654 01:17:01,538 --> 01:17:05,409 made, marrying Mindy is definitely his best. 1655 01:17:05,442 --> 01:17:07,444 Welcome to the family. 1656 01:17:07,478 --> 01:17:10,013 - Hear, hear! - Cheers! 1657 01:17:10,047 --> 01:17:11,648 Cheers. 1658 01:17:23,460 --> 01:17:25,396 It's for Christmas. 1659 01:17:26,430 --> 01:17:27,631 The tree? 1660 01:17:27,664 --> 01:17:29,133 Oh, you don't say. 1661 01:17:29,166 --> 01:17:31,235 I brought it in from outside. 1662 01:17:31,502 --> 01:17:33,537 It looks like it grew in here but... 1663 01:17:33,570 --> 01:17:35,906 that tree grew outside. 1664 01:17:37,107 --> 01:17:38,008 Elaine! 1665 01:17:38,041 --> 01:17:39,376 - Hi. - Hi! 1666 01:17:39,410 --> 01:17:40,644 Have you seen Josh? 1667 01:17:40,677 --> 01:17:43,213 I think he went to go find an Aspirin. 1668 01:17:43,247 --> 01:17:44,481 He said he had a bit of a headache. 1669 01:17:44,515 --> 01:17:45,716 Ah. 1670 01:17:45,749 --> 01:17:48,452 Anthony probably should have gone with my prepared remarks. 1671 01:17:48,485 --> 01:17:50,020 Mm. 1672 01:17:50,053 --> 01:17:51,455 I'm glad you're here. 1673 01:17:51,488 --> 01:17:53,323 Josh has been talking about you for months. 1674 01:17:53,357 --> 01:17:54,291 Oh, God. 1675 01:17:54,324 --> 01:17:56,160 I cannot even imagine what he's told you. 1676 01:17:56,193 --> 01:17:58,529 I swear I am not that bad. 1677 01:17:58,562 --> 01:18:03,367 He told me that you drive him crazy... 1678 01:18:03,400 --> 01:18:06,503 and that you challenge him and that... 1679 01:18:06,537 --> 01:18:09,139 you're as strong-willed as he is. 1680 01:18:09,373 --> 01:18:12,109 You know, I thought when Mindy left him and he took that job at 1681 01:18:12,142 --> 01:18:16,380 B&G that he had hit rock bottom but... 1682 01:18:16,413 --> 01:18:18,649 now, I think it might be the best thing that ever happened to 1683 01:18:18,682 --> 01:18:20,517 him. 1684 01:18:21,820 --> 01:18:24,756 And for what it's worth, I've never seen him look at anyone 1685 01:18:24,789 --> 01:18:27,391 the way he looks at you. 1686 01:18:28,459 --> 01:18:29,226 - Ah! - Hi! 1687 01:18:29,259 --> 01:18:32,062 There's my beautiful groom, aww. 1688 01:18:32,095 --> 01:18:33,130 Have you already lost your wife? 1689 01:18:33,163 --> 01:18:34,431 No, not yet. 1690 01:18:34,465 --> 01:18:36,768 She's hiding in the kitchen, eating in peace. 1691 01:18:36,801 --> 01:18:37,968 Mm. 1692 01:18:38,001 --> 01:18:40,537 Mom, you may need to head back into the reception room. 1693 01:18:40,571 --> 01:18:43,307 I think Dad's maybe had one too many. 1694 01:18:43,340 --> 01:18:44,241 Oh. 1695 01:18:44,274 --> 01:18:46,510 Once more, unto the breach. 1696 01:18:46,543 --> 01:18:48,445 If you ask me, it's a Goddamn waste. 1697 01:18:48,479 --> 01:18:51,248 MBA from Harvard and you spend your days running errands and 1698 01:18:51,281 --> 01:18:54,485 licking stamps so you can flirt with some little intern. 1699 01:18:54,518 --> 01:18:55,419 Intern? 1700 01:18:55,452 --> 01:18:57,421 Maybe you should take a walk. 1701 01:18:57,454 --> 01:18:58,355 "I don't want to be a doctor." 1702 01:18:58,388 --> 01:19:00,557 At least do something marginally noble. 1703 01:19:00,591 --> 01:19:02,593 - Anthony... - Join the Peace Corps. 1704 01:19:02,626 --> 01:19:04,595 Go build wells in Nigeria. 1705 01:19:04,628 --> 01:19:07,064 You don't think that publishing is noble? 1706 01:19:07,097 --> 01:19:08,232 Contributing to culture? 1707 01:19:08,265 --> 01:19:10,501 I... I don't think that he's making books, Sweetheart. 1708 01:19:10,534 --> 01:19:13,504 I think he's making coffee for somebody who's making books. 1709 01:19:13,537 --> 01:19:15,272 And by the way, it's none of your business. 1710 01:19:15,305 --> 01:19:17,541 Don't speak to her that way. 1711 01:19:17,574 --> 01:19:20,143 Okay, well since you know nothing about your son, 1712 01:19:20,177 --> 01:19:21,745 I'll just... I'll... I'll fill you in real quick. 1713 01:19:21,779 --> 01:19:24,782 Josh is the person that our sales and finance divisions 1714 01:19:24,816 --> 01:19:25,482 report to. 1715 01:19:25,516 --> 01:19:27,651 They are scared shitless of him. 1716 01:19:27,684 --> 01:19:30,487 I have seen grown men run around like ants triple-checking their 1717 01:19:30,521 --> 01:19:33,123 numbers because Josh always finds their mistakes. 1718 01:19:33,156 --> 01:19:34,191 Lucy, you don't have to. 1719 01:19:34,224 --> 01:19:35,425 It's fine. 1720 01:19:35,459 --> 01:19:37,194 I'm sorry, I know I'm making a really big scene and I'm sorry. 1721 01:19:37,227 --> 01:19:38,729 I... I like all of you. 1722 01:19:38,763 --> 01:19:40,330 Um, except you. 1723 01:19:40,364 --> 01:19:42,499 But I... I can't listen to this. 1724 01:19:42,533 --> 01:19:43,768 Oh, and for the record, Josh's boss, 1725 01:19:43,801 --> 01:19:47,371 who is CEO in title only, is a sleazy toad who can barely tie 1726 01:19:47,404 --> 01:19:48,372 his own shoelaces. 1727 01:19:48,405 --> 01:19:50,340 Josh runs that place. 1728 01:19:50,641 --> 01:19:51,809 Actually, we both do. 1729 01:19:51,843 --> 01:19:54,545 And the only reason that B&G didn't completely implode after 1730 01:19:54,578 --> 01:19:57,347 the merger is because Josh oversaw a reduction of the 1731 01:19:57,381 --> 01:19:59,650 workforce by 35 percent, and because of him, 1732 01:19:59,683 --> 01:20:01,351 200 people kept their jobs. 1733 01:20:01,385 --> 01:20:02,486 And so he's not a doctor. 1734 01:20:02,519 --> 01:20:03,855 Who the fuck cares? 1735 01:20:03,888 --> 01:20:05,522 He's smart. 1736 01:20:05,556 --> 01:20:07,691 Your son is tough and he has made me a lot better at my job 1737 01:20:07,724 --> 01:20:09,459 by having to compete with him. 1738 01:20:09,493 --> 01:20:11,461 Don't get me wrong, he drives me absolutely insane, 1739 01:20:11,495 --> 01:20:12,864 which is apparently hereditary. 1740 01:20:12,897 --> 01:20:15,165 But your son is amazing. 1741 01:20:15,198 --> 01:20:16,133 And the fact that you can't see that, 1742 01:20:16,166 --> 01:20:18,402 that is a goddamn shame. 1743 01:20:21,538 --> 01:20:24,575 In conclusion, uh, congratulations to the bride and 1744 01:20:24,608 --> 01:20:25,676 groom! 1745 01:20:25,709 --> 01:20:27,845 Just amazing. 1746 01:20:27,879 --> 01:20:30,514 Um, let's go home. 1747 01:20:30,547 --> 01:20:32,784 Anthony, sir, it's been a real treat. 1748 01:20:32,817 --> 01:20:35,652 Elaine, it was lovely meeting you. 1749 01:20:36,687 --> 01:20:38,522 I'll call you. 1750 01:20:54,404 --> 01:20:55,639 So, what now? 1751 01:20:55,672 --> 01:20:57,674 Naked time?- 1752 01:20:57,708 --> 01:20:59,276 After naked time? 1753 01:20:59,309 --> 01:21:01,311 Rehydration. 1754 01:21:05,482 --> 01:21:07,551 Lucy, I've had a lot of women... 1755 01:21:07,584 --> 01:21:10,654 I seriously hope there's an end to that sentence. 1756 01:21:13,057 --> 01:21:15,860 I've had a lot of women tell me that I'm... I'm not the kind of 1757 01:21:15,893 --> 01:21:18,161 guy you settle down with. 1758 01:21:18,595 --> 01:21:21,164 I'm the one-night-stand. 1759 01:21:21,933 --> 01:21:24,368 And you think that's what I'm doing? 1760 01:21:24,401 --> 01:21:26,403 I hope not. 1761 01:21:29,573 --> 01:21:31,608 I don't understand you. 1762 01:21:31,642 --> 01:21:34,444 I seriously thought you hated me. 1763 01:21:34,745 --> 01:21:36,246 Never. 1764 01:21:36,513 --> 01:21:39,282 Never, not for one second. 1765 01:21:39,917 --> 01:21:42,319 And I can prove it to you. 1766 01:21:43,754 --> 01:21:45,589 All right, you have to come in here. 1767 01:21:45,622 --> 01:21:46,891 Okay. 1768 01:21:46,924 --> 01:21:49,593 And I'm gonna need to take this. 1769 01:21:49,626 --> 01:21:51,662 I thought you weren't feeling naked time. 1770 01:21:52,830 --> 01:21:53,664 You're kinda giving me mixed signals here, Templeman. 1771 01:21:53,697 --> 01:21:55,632 We're not going to the bed. 1772 01:21:55,666 --> 01:21:59,269 You have to stand... right here. 1773 01:21:59,302 --> 01:22:01,505 - Okay. - Now... 1774 01:22:02,807 --> 01:22:04,809 tell me what you see. 1775 01:22:04,842 --> 01:22:07,611 Um, well... 1776 01:22:07,644 --> 01:22:10,815 my hair's a little scraggly and my lipstick's faded. 1777 01:22:10,848 --> 01:22:12,784 You're perfect. 1778 01:22:12,817 --> 01:22:14,618 Guess again. 1779 01:22:14,986 --> 01:22:16,954 Oh! 1780 01:22:17,688 --> 01:22:18,890 My dress! 1781 01:22:18,923 --> 01:22:20,691 Look. 1782 01:22:21,458 --> 01:22:22,927 Like a tree frog. 1783 01:22:24,728 --> 01:22:26,463 What exactly does that prove? 1784 01:22:26,496 --> 01:22:29,666 Your dress isn't the only thing that matches your eyes. 1785 01:22:32,770 --> 01:22:34,705 Oh, my God. 1786 01:22:34,738 --> 01:22:35,639 Wait, did you... 1787 01:22:35,672 --> 01:22:36,841 How about this? 1788 01:22:36,874 --> 01:22:38,976 Let's play a different game. 1789 01:22:39,010 --> 01:22:40,945 The "Starting Over" game. 1790 01:22:41,712 --> 01:22:42,847 Hi. 1791 01:22:42,880 --> 01:22:45,016 I'm Joshua Templeman, nice to meet you. 1792 01:22:45,049 --> 01:22:46,951 Hi. 1793 01:22:46,984 --> 01:22:48,652 Um... 1794 01:22:48,685 --> 01:22:50,520 I'm Lucy Hutton. 1795 01:22:50,554 --> 01:22:54,491 I'm from Charlotte, Vermont, where they grow strawberries. 1796 01:22:54,524 --> 01:22:57,394 And because of that, I'm gonna call you "Shortcake." 1797 01:22:57,427 --> 01:23:00,430 It'll be a dead giveaway that I love you. 1798 01:23:02,733 --> 01:23:03,801 You're freaking out. 1799 01:23:03,835 --> 01:23:04,869 No. 1800 01:23:04,902 --> 01:23:07,839 - Don't freak out. - No, I just... 1801 01:23:08,505 --> 01:23:10,407 I just... 1802 01:23:10,440 --> 01:23:12,476 I... I am not... I am not prepared for this. 1803 01:23:12,509 --> 01:23:13,610 What do you mean? 1804 01:23:13,643 --> 01:23:15,545 After New Year's, one of us is gonna be out of a job. 1805 01:23:15,579 --> 01:23:18,582 Any relationship we tried, it would be over before it started. 1806 01:23:18,615 --> 01:23:19,683 Well, maybe not. 1807 01:23:19,716 --> 01:23:21,018 Maybe nobody has to quit. 1808 01:23:21,052 --> 01:23:22,586 No, this would never work. 1809 01:23:22,619 --> 01:23:23,687 You know that, okay? 1810 01:23:23,720 --> 01:23:24,889 We would kill each other. 1811 01:23:26,690 --> 01:23:28,725 Luce, I know you. 1812 01:23:29,026 --> 01:23:31,863 I know that you blot your lips twice before you throw your 1813 01:23:31,896 --> 01:23:33,798 tissue away. 1814 01:23:34,364 --> 01:23:38,035 I know that your voice drops an octave when you get upset. 1815 01:23:38,236 --> 01:23:40,537 I know you chew your lower lip when you're doing something you 1816 01:23:40,570 --> 01:23:42,606 don't wanna do. 1817 01:23:42,874 --> 01:23:45,910 And I know that you're scared right now. 1818 01:23:46,343 --> 01:23:48,780 But you don't have to be. 1819 01:23:50,580 --> 01:23:52,582 I'm in this. 1820 01:23:52,616 --> 01:23:54,718 And you can trust that. 1821 01:25:18,102 --> 01:25:21,605 It's a dangerous time for men these days, Josh. 1822 01:25:21,638 --> 01:25:24,876 If we don't stick together, manic pixie twits like Lucy 1823 01:25:24,909 --> 01:25:27,945 Hutton, they're gonna be running this country on lipstick and 1824 01:25:27,979 --> 01:25:29,213 feelings. 1825 01:25:29,247 --> 01:25:31,715 I can tell you I didn't start this company to have my balls 1826 01:25:31,748 --> 01:25:34,185 crushed by some nitwit in a push-up bra. 1827 01:25:34,218 --> 01:25:35,452 Do you hear me? 1828 01:25:35,485 --> 01:25:36,287 Loud and clear. 1829 01:25:36,320 --> 01:25:38,022 I have a vision for this company, 1830 01:25:38,055 --> 01:25:40,892 and I'm counting on you to make it happen. 1831 01:25:40,925 --> 01:25:42,793 So, do you have a strategy? 1832 01:25:42,827 --> 01:25:43,995 - Do you have a plan? - I do. 1833 01:25:44,028 --> 01:25:46,063 It's already underway. 1834 01:25:46,297 --> 01:25:48,665 I told her she'd back off if you let her think that she could 1835 01:25:48,698 --> 01:25:50,567 pet the pony. 1836 01:25:50,600 --> 01:25:52,203 I'm glad you took my advice. 1837 01:25:52,236 --> 01:25:54,839 Is there anything else I can do to help you cinch this thing? 1838 01:25:54,872 --> 01:25:55,940 No. 1839 01:25:55,973 --> 01:25:58,042 No, no, no, I... I don't need any help beating her. 1840 01:25:58,075 --> 01:25:59,509 All right, I'm sure you don't. 1841 01:25:59,542 --> 01:26:01,012 Get on it, then. 1842 01:26:03,580 --> 01:26:05,548 Hey, are you free? 1843 01:26:06,117 --> 01:26:08,786 I'm heading to the coffeeshop right now. 1844 01:26:17,161 --> 01:26:19,063 So he's sexually gaslighting you? 1845 01:26:19,096 --> 01:26:21,232 That is diabolical. 1846 01:26:21,265 --> 01:26:23,067 I guess it makes sense; you're not gonna work as hard if you're 1847 01:26:23,100 --> 01:26:25,002 crushing on him. 1848 01:26:25,036 --> 01:26:27,872 I wonder what it's like to be a dude who uses his raw animal 1849 01:26:27,905 --> 01:26:30,041 magnetism as a weapon. 1850 01:26:30,074 --> 01:26:32,043 Yeah, but it's one thing to flirt. 1851 01:26:32,076 --> 01:26:34,511 It's a whole other thing to pretend like you have actual 1852 01:26:34,544 --> 01:26:35,379 feelings. 1853 01:26:35,413 --> 01:26:37,949 I just... I feel like such an idiot. 1854 01:26:38,883 --> 01:26:41,052 Are you sure it's okay that we're talking about all this? 1855 01:26:41,085 --> 01:26:42,153 Yeah. 1856 01:26:42,186 --> 01:26:44,922 I mean, I'm basically the mayor of the Friendzone, 1857 01:26:44,956 --> 01:26:48,960 so I'm hip, safe space, carry on. 1858 01:26:50,027 --> 01:26:53,898 I just cannot believe I let myself get played like this. 1859 01:26:54,999 --> 01:26:57,802 I mean, he seemed so sincere. 1860 01:26:58,336 --> 01:27:00,905 Well, fear not, my sweet friend. 1861 01:27:00,938 --> 01:27:02,639 You are going to nail that interview, 1862 01:27:02,672 --> 01:27:06,110 get the job, and then order will be restored to the universe. 1863 01:27:06,143 --> 01:27:07,278 Yes. 1864 01:27:07,311 --> 01:27:09,914 Well, justice demands that Josh live a long life alone, 1865 01:27:09,947 --> 01:27:11,748 sucking on Bexley's nasty nuts. 1866 01:27:11,782 --> 01:27:13,516 So... 1867 01:27:14,919 --> 01:27:17,121 - Oh, hey, Josh. - What are you doing here? 1868 01:27:17,154 --> 01:27:18,956 I was looking for you. 1869 01:27:18,990 --> 01:27:21,524 Thought I'd join you for a coffee. 1870 01:27:21,792 --> 01:27:24,962 I don't like you enough to get a coffee with you. 1871 01:27:26,864 --> 01:27:28,833 My mistake. 1872 01:27:31,601 --> 01:27:33,971 Solid burn. 1873 01:27:39,043 --> 01:27:41,745 Do we have confirmation that the London Review is featuring 1874 01:27:41,779 --> 01:27:42,679 'Stripping Time?' 1875 01:27:42,712 --> 01:27:43,914 CC'd you on the email. 1876 01:27:43,948 --> 01:27:46,951 No, I'm looking at my inbox and it's not here, you sociopath. 1877 01:27:46,984 --> 01:27:50,687 Well, then you're either blind or just lying, as usual. 1878 01:27:50,720 --> 01:27:51,756 I don't lie. 1879 01:27:51,789 --> 01:27:52,990 You lie all the time. 1880 01:27:53,024 --> 01:27:55,292 You just don't see it as lying because you tell people what 1881 01:27:55,326 --> 01:27:56,659 they wanna hear. 1882 01:27:56,693 --> 01:27:57,361 What? 1883 01:27:57,395 --> 01:27:58,863 Name one time I've done that. 1884 01:27:58,896 --> 01:28:01,999 You told me you weren't interested in Danny. 1885 01:28:02,233 --> 01:28:03,834 Wow. 1886 01:28:04,335 --> 01:28:06,003 Wow. 1887 01:28:06,037 --> 01:28:07,204 That is amazing. 1888 01:28:07,238 --> 01:28:09,706 You are actually gonna play this thing all the way through, 1889 01:28:09,739 --> 01:28:11,008 aren't you? 1890 01:28:11,042 --> 01:28:12,009 And see, that's what I don't get. 1891 01:28:12,043 --> 01:28:13,643 Throw me off my game, fine. 1892 01:28:13,676 --> 01:28:14,912 Flirt with me, mess with my head, whatever. 1893 01:28:14,945 --> 01:28:17,680 But why would you want to keep me from dating someone else? 1894 01:28:17,714 --> 01:28:19,116 Danny is nice! 1895 01:28:19,150 --> 01:28:20,051 And I'm not. 1896 01:28:20,084 --> 01:28:22,119 I thought you were... 1897 01:28:22,153 --> 01:28:24,321 somewhere under the layers of psychological damage. 1898 01:28:24,355 --> 01:28:27,825 But it turns out you would just do whatever it takes to win and 1899 01:28:27,858 --> 01:28:28,993 make your daddy proud. 1900 01:28:29,026 --> 01:28:30,261 And you know what? 1901 01:28:30,294 --> 01:28:33,330 I am so glad that I threw up all over you 'cause I am this close 1902 01:28:33,364 --> 01:28:34,165 to doing it again! 1903 01:28:34,198 --> 01:28:35,665 What is wrong with you?! 1904 01:28:35,698 --> 01:28:37,101 I heard you with Bexley! 1905 01:28:37,134 --> 01:28:38,335 And? 1906 01:28:38,369 --> 01:28:40,271 And I bet if he knew you'd had a hand all the way up my skirt, 1907 01:28:40,304 --> 01:28:42,039 he'd throw a parade in your honor! 1908 01:28:42,073 --> 01:28:44,641 - That's not... - Hey, Josh, Josh, Josh, Josh! 1909 01:28:44,674 --> 01:28:46,743 I'm gonna need those projections on my desk by Friday. 1910 01:28:46,777 --> 01:28:47,744 I don't have the time. 1911 01:28:47,778 --> 01:28:48,846 Lucy can do it. 1912 01:28:48,879 --> 01:28:49,914 Hutton! 1913 01:28:49,947 --> 01:28:52,083 Care to grow some hair on your nuts and step up? 1914 01:28:52,116 --> 01:28:53,818 You know, Richard, I would love to, 1915 01:28:53,851 --> 01:28:56,153 but I doubt a nitwit in a push-up bra would be much help 1916 01:28:56,187 --> 01:28:57,788 to you. 1917 01:28:59,090 --> 01:29:03,094 Josh, projections, on my desk Friday. 1918 01:29:03,861 --> 01:29:06,330 There is no way in hell I am letting you and Bexley destroy 1919 01:29:06,363 --> 01:29:07,932 this place. 1920 01:30:12,296 --> 01:30:13,764 Lucy? 1921 01:30:13,797 --> 01:30:14,999 Hi. 1922 01:30:15,032 --> 01:30:16,967 You have a call at two with TLS, unless you want me to take it. 1923 01:30:17,001 --> 01:30:18,269 I know the catalogue. 1924 01:30:18,302 --> 01:30:19,403 It's all yours. 1925 01:30:19,436 --> 01:30:21,205 Wait, do you know where Josh is? 1926 01:30:21,238 --> 01:30:23,240 I haven't seen him since yesterday. 1927 01:30:23,274 --> 01:30:24,942 That's weird, right? 1928 01:30:24,975 --> 01:30:26,110 The week of the presentation? 1929 01:30:26,143 --> 01:30:28,412 He's... he's up to something. 1930 01:30:28,445 --> 01:30:31,048 I wouldn't put it past him. 1931 01:30:31,515 --> 01:30:32,449 You ready for this? 1932 01:30:32,483 --> 01:30:34,018 Hell yes. 1933 01:30:34,051 --> 01:30:35,752 I will bring my A game. 1934 01:30:35,786 --> 01:30:38,022 That's what I like to hear. 1935 01:31:00,244 --> 01:31:01,879 Go get 'em, Tiger! 1936 01:31:06,050 --> 01:31:07,251 Lucy! 1937 01:31:07,284 --> 01:31:09,220 This is my boyfriend's niece, Daisy... the one I told you 1938 01:31:09,253 --> 01:31:11,322 about for the internship. 1939 01:31:12,056 --> 01:31:13,290 This is Daisy? 1940 01:31:13,324 --> 01:31:15,292 Like the flower. 1941 01:31:23,234 --> 01:31:25,035 No. 1942 01:31:26,303 --> 01:31:27,371 Absolutely not. 1943 01:31:27,404 --> 01:31:28,205 No, but you said that... 1944 01:31:28,239 --> 01:31:30,441 I got steamrolled and you know it. 1945 01:31:30,474 --> 01:31:32,977 I'm sorry, you seem like a lovely girl, 1946 01:31:33,010 --> 01:31:34,845 but you actually couldn't have picked a worse time. 1947 01:31:34,878 --> 01:31:37,248 And you still haven't turned in your monthly report. 1948 01:31:37,281 --> 01:31:38,282 Oh, yes, I wanted to talk to you about that... 1949 01:31:38,315 --> 01:31:39,216 No, don't worry about it. 1950 01:31:39,250 --> 01:31:40,084 I already talked to Alan, I got the numbers, 1951 01:31:40,117 --> 01:31:42,353 and I did the report myself... again. 1952 01:31:42,386 --> 01:31:44,021 You're such an angel. 1953 01:31:44,054 --> 01:31:45,456 No, I'm not an angel. 1954 01:31:45,489 --> 01:31:47,891 I'm a patsy and I am done. 1955 01:31:47,925 --> 01:31:49,360 It's a migraine or a sprained wrist. 1956 01:31:49,393 --> 01:31:51,895 I mean, three months ago, you couldn't turn in the report 1957 01:31:51,929 --> 01:31:54,298 because a bird flew in your face coming off the subway and you 1958 01:31:54,331 --> 01:31:56,100 were too distraught to concentrate. 1959 01:31:56,133 --> 01:31:57,201 It was a big bird... 1960 01:31:57,234 --> 01:31:59,203 And while I sympathize with your various plights... 1961 01:31:59,236 --> 01:32:01,005 You don't sound sympathetic. 1962 01:32:01,038 --> 01:32:02,239 She doesn't sound sympathetic. 1963 01:32:02,273 --> 01:32:04,942 I'm gonna have to ask you to do your job. 1964 01:32:07,278 --> 01:32:09,580 I'm disappointed in you. 1965 01:32:09,613 --> 01:32:11,315 Well... 1966 01:32:14,084 --> 01:32:15,886 Impressive. 1967 01:32:15,919 --> 01:32:17,121 Thank you. 1968 01:32:17,154 --> 01:32:19,323 Not that I... need your validation. 1969 01:32:19,356 --> 01:32:21,058 Thank you for coming. 1970 01:32:21,091 --> 01:32:22,059 Lucy Hutton? 1971 01:32:22,092 --> 01:32:23,294 You're up next. 1972 01:32:23,327 --> 01:32:25,062 Okay. 1973 01:32:28,565 --> 01:32:30,467 One thing... 1974 01:32:30,934 --> 01:32:34,271 If you get this job, are you actually gonna let Bexley gut 1975 01:32:34,305 --> 01:32:36,407 the literary department? 1976 01:32:36,907 --> 01:32:38,575 It's his business. 1977 01:32:38,609 --> 01:32:40,277 He can do what he wants with it. 1978 01:32:41,645 --> 01:32:43,047 Okay. 1979 01:32:43,080 --> 01:32:45,249 That's all I needed to know. 1980 01:32:46,417 --> 01:32:50,054 This is the first chapter of a new book from best-selling 1981 01:32:50,087 --> 01:32:52,523 author Emily Powery. 1982 01:32:52,556 --> 01:32:57,294 I propose creating a cross-media platform so that people can 1983 01:32:57,328 --> 01:33:00,964 download e-books or audiobooks and then have conversations with 1984 01:33:00,998 --> 01:33:03,300 other readers and the writer. 1985 01:33:03,334 --> 01:33:04,435 How would that work? 1986 01:33:04,468 --> 01:33:06,403 Well, once you finished a chapter, 1987 01:33:06,437 --> 01:33:09,273 you are then directed to a community group to discuss the 1988 01:33:09,306 --> 01:33:10,174 story. 1989 01:33:10,207 --> 01:33:12,643 And the writer is part of that community. 1990 01:33:12,676 --> 01:33:14,611 They publish a chapter at a time, 1991 01:33:14,645 --> 01:33:16,447 like the old 19th century serials, 1992 01:33:16,480 --> 01:33:19,283 and then join the conversation with the readers before they 1993 01:33:19,316 --> 01:33:21,285 write the next chapter. 1994 01:33:21,318 --> 01:33:22,553 Interesting. 1995 01:33:22,586 --> 01:33:24,988 If you turn to section two of the document in front of you, 1996 01:33:25,022 --> 01:33:28,158 you will see the budget that I'm proposing. 1997 01:33:30,694 --> 01:33:34,498 They seriously grilled me on the numbers but... 1998 01:33:34,531 --> 01:33:36,100 I think I held my own. 1999 01:33:36,133 --> 01:33:37,401 I'm sure you blew them away. 2000 01:33:37,434 --> 01:33:39,370 And I have to say, whether or not I get this job, 2001 01:33:39,403 --> 01:33:41,472 this whole thing, it... 2002 01:33:41,505 --> 01:33:44,074 it did kinda wake me up. 2003 01:33:45,309 --> 01:33:47,144 Well, here's a little something. 2004 01:33:47,177 --> 01:33:48,445 Oh, my God. 2005 01:33:48,479 --> 01:33:49,480 A Peacock edition? 2006 01:33:49,513 --> 01:33:51,081 Helen! 2007 01:33:51,448 --> 01:33:54,184 Oh, it's beautiful. 2008 01:33:54,218 --> 01:33:58,322 Mr. Darcy was such a great romantic hero: 2009 01:33:58,355 --> 01:34:00,457 inscrutable, misunderstood. 2010 01:34:00,491 --> 01:34:01,525 I don't know. 2011 01:34:01,558 --> 01:34:04,194 I think she might be setting up a false expectation. 2012 01:34:04,228 --> 01:34:05,996 Sometimes... 2013 01:34:06,029 --> 01:34:07,197 guy's just an asshole. 2014 01:34:07,231 --> 01:34:09,500 That has certainly been my experience. 2015 01:34:11,001 --> 01:34:13,904 And it's gonna look nice in your library. 2016 01:34:19,510 --> 01:34:21,512 It's a great promotion for you. 2017 01:34:21,545 --> 01:34:23,247 Thank you. 2018 01:34:23,447 --> 01:34:24,281 Lucy! 2019 01:34:24,314 --> 01:34:26,417 We were just about to come find you. 2020 01:34:29,253 --> 01:34:31,121 Congratulations. 2021 01:34:31,555 --> 01:34:33,357 You earned it. 2022 01:34:34,425 --> 01:34:35,993 Well... 2023 01:34:36,026 --> 01:34:39,163 we've all had a big decision to make today. 2024 01:34:39,196 --> 01:34:41,665 I think it goes without saying that this merger has been a 2025 01:34:41,698 --> 01:34:47,004 little bumpy, but I think that B&G is positioned now to become 2026 01:34:47,037 --> 01:34:50,007 a major literary powerhouse. 2027 01:34:50,040 --> 01:34:54,211 I know first-hand that no one is more savvy or tenacious than its 2028 01:34:54,244 --> 01:34:56,680 new managing director... 2029 01:34:58,715 --> 01:35:00,417 Lucy Hutton. 2030 01:35:00,451 --> 01:35:02,653 - Congratulations, Lucy. - What? 2031 01:35:05,122 --> 01:35:07,291 Way to go, Luce. 2032 01:35:07,724 --> 01:35:09,059 What? 2033 01:35:09,092 --> 01:35:10,294 Wait, but she just said that... 2034 01:35:10,327 --> 01:35:12,529 I took a job as acquisitions editor at Harper Collins last 2035 01:35:12,563 --> 01:35:13,230 week. 2036 01:35:13,263 --> 01:35:14,331 Son of a bitch. 2037 01:35:14,364 --> 01:35:16,567 So when you said you didn't need help beating me... 2038 01:35:16,600 --> 01:35:19,369 It's because I had decided to resign. 2039 01:35:19,403 --> 01:35:20,537 Why didn't you tell me? 2040 01:35:20,571 --> 01:35:22,706 That would be my fault. 2041 01:35:22,739 --> 01:35:24,441 I begged him not to say anything. 2042 01:35:24,475 --> 01:35:25,777 I am sorry, Lucy. 2043 01:35:25,810 --> 01:35:29,379 Just fighting with Josh lit such a fire under you, 2044 01:35:29,413 --> 01:35:32,583 I knew if you kept that drive, you'd beat everyone else and get 2045 01:35:32,616 --> 01:35:33,684 the job. 2046 01:35:33,717 --> 01:35:35,085 She would've kicked your ass too, Josh! 2047 01:35:36,186 --> 01:35:37,621 Fair enough. 2048 01:35:37,822 --> 01:35:42,125 Luce, you are the heart and soul of this place and everybody 2049 01:35:42,159 --> 01:35:43,227 knows it. 2050 01:35:43,260 --> 01:35:46,129 Just what the company needs: more heart and soul. 2051 01:35:46,163 --> 01:35:47,598 Richard... 2052 01:35:47,631 --> 01:35:48,565 shut up. 2053 01:35:48,599 --> 01:35:50,802 In fact, always just keep your mouth shut, 2054 01:35:50,835 --> 01:35:52,269 as a general rule. 2055 01:35:53,303 --> 01:35:55,405 Hey... 2056 01:35:55,439 --> 01:35:56,573 You're fired! 2057 01:35:56,607 --> 01:35:58,408 Already quit, jackass. 2058 01:35:58,642 --> 01:36:01,044 Oh, shit... 2059 01:36:06,183 --> 01:36:08,585 You know what I just realized? 2060 01:36:08,619 --> 01:36:10,320 What's that? 2061 01:36:10,354 --> 01:36:12,757 You are the nice guy. 2062 01:36:12,790 --> 01:36:14,658 You take that back. 2063 01:36:14,691 --> 01:36:16,560 Nope. 2064 01:36:31,642 --> 01:36:32,476 Where are you off to? 2065 01:36:32,509 --> 01:36:34,378 Weekend at the Cape. 2066 01:36:34,411 --> 01:36:36,146 See you on Monday! 2067 01:36:36,179 --> 01:36:37,648 Or Thursday. 2068 01:36:37,681 --> 01:36:39,349 No, no, no, we have a contract with O'Brien, 2069 01:36:39,383 --> 01:36:40,651 so if he wants to switch publishers, 2070 01:36:40,684 --> 01:36:41,285 you're gonna have to buy him out. 2071 01:36:41,318 --> 01:36:42,452 Will you hold on a second? 2072 01:36:42,486 --> 01:36:44,789 This has a year's worth of sexual harassment claims against 2073 01:36:44,822 --> 01:36:45,656 Richard Bexley. 2074 01:36:45,689 --> 01:36:46,290 Give it to the board? 2075 01:36:46,323 --> 01:36:47,524 Thanks. 2076 01:36:48,392 --> 01:36:51,094 That is due Wednesday. 2077 01:36:51,395 --> 01:36:55,299 So, it turns out love and hate aren't as similar as I 2078 01:36:55,332 --> 01:36:55,732 thought. 2079 01:36:55,767 --> 01:36:56,733 Son of a bitch! 2080 01:36:56,768 --> 01:36:58,669 Yeah, well, our legal team would beg differ. 2081 01:36:58,702 --> 01:37:00,504 Sure, they both get your blood pumping and make you 2082 01:37:00,537 --> 01:37:03,373 want to do crazy things to someone else's body. 2083 01:37:03,407 --> 01:37:04,708 Shove it up your semicolon! 2084 01:37:04,741 --> 01:37:05,843 No, no, no, no. 2085 01:37:05,877 --> 01:37:07,544 Think 30 percent higher. 2086 01:37:07,578 --> 01:37:09,179 But when you love someone, 2087 01:37:09,212 --> 01:37:13,183 and I mean really love someone, even when you fight, 2088 01:37:13,216 --> 01:37:14,718 you're still on the same team. 2089 01:37:14,751 --> 01:37:17,187 Look, if you wanna poach one of our writers, 2090 01:37:17,220 --> 01:37:19,189 you're gonna take a bath while doing it. 2091 01:37:19,222 --> 01:37:20,691 Interesting. 2092 01:37:20,724 --> 01:37:23,694 You know, I think I'm gonna need a few more details on that 2093 01:37:23,727 --> 01:37:24,896 particular proposal. 2094 01:37:24,929 --> 01:37:27,899 You should know that I never mix business with pleasure. 2095 01:37:27,932 --> 01:37:29,433 Never? 2096 01:37:29,466 --> 01:37:30,667 - Hi. - Hi. 2097 01:37:30,701 --> 01:37:31,602 How was your day? 2098 01:37:31,635 --> 01:37:33,704 Well, there's this new exec over at B&G. 2099 01:37:33,737 --> 01:37:35,372 She's being a real hard-ass. 2100 01:37:35,405 --> 01:37:36,673 Ugh, bitch. 2101 01:37:36,707 --> 01:37:37,875 Yours? 2102 01:37:37,909 --> 01:37:40,344 Oh, there's this snake at Harper Collins who's trying to 2103 01:37:40,377 --> 01:37:41,545 steal one of our best writers. 2104 01:37:41,578 --> 01:37:43,280 Aww, Shortcake. 2105 01:37:43,313 --> 01:37:44,648 You want me to beat him up for you? 2106 01:37:44,681 --> 01:37:45,515 No. 2107 01:37:45,549 --> 01:37:48,385 I don't want you fighting anyone but me. 2108 01:38:08,990 --> 01:38:10,670 Provided by explosiveskull https://twitter.com/kaboomskull 143882