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-David Hassel...-David Hasselhoff...
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He was the star of
Knight Rider and Baywatch
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and even found time tobring down the Berlin Wall.
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According to
The Guinness Book of World Records,
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over 1.1 billion viewerswatched David Hasselhoff
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at the height of his fame.But where did the viewers go?
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...comeback tourwas pulled by US promoters.
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Is the career of the famouslifeguard all washed up?
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And another divorce for David Hasselhoff
10
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and a fifth setof alimony payments to make.
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David Hasselhoff has nowfiled for bankruptcy.
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According to his UK manager,he's leaving the United States
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to pursue opportunities in England.
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What the hell is going on?
15
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I've got a driver who is
educationally challenged.
16
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Are you a hologram?
Are you... Can I touch you?
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I have an assistant
who's never been an assistant before.
18
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Nah! What year is it?
19
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And I think I'm having an LSD flashback.
20
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Turbo boost! Turbo boost!
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-[screams]
-Stop!
22
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I still think that
Michael Knight wouldn't say it
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-the way that David is saying it.
-Agreed.
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What?
25
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I hesitate to say that David
is here out of desperation.
26
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[yelling]
27
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But, for want of a better phrase,
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David is here out of desperation.
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Which one of you is David Hasselhoff?
30
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What are you doing?
31
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-I quit.
-No, you are fired.
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-No, I quit.
-Fired.
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-I am Dieter Hasselhoff.
-What?
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I am your son.
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[David Hasselhoff] Oh, God!
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Dieter, if you're going to stay here,
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-you gotta flush.
-Sorry.
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-Okay.
-[knocking]
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[greets in German]
40
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Uh, sorry. This is room 116?
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-Ja.
-Uh...
42
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Morning, Harriet.
43
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Oh, morning! Um, all right,
maybe I'll come back.
44
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Well, I'm not used to workingwith celebrities.
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I'm not sure
if it's common practice to have
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young German boys in your room.
47
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Good morning!
48
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Max, I'd like you to meet, um,
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my son, Dieter.
50
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Pleased to meet you. Dieter Hasselhoff.
51
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You have a German son? You sure?
52
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Max, he shows up last night in my room.
53
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Twenty-five years ago when I was
on the Berlin Wall, I met a girl and, uh,
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we spent the night together.
55
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Max, I think he's my son.
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That was a shock, finding out
that David had a German son.
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It sort of adds up.
58
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David is renowned for being the most
fertile celebrity in the business.
59
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Wow! You must really like bread.
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It's for the pigeons.
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Right.
62
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So, uh, what gigs we got coming up?
63
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Right, okay, um...
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We've got a Danish chocolate bar.
65
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There's a high profile
sausage endorsement.
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There was meant to be
a safe sex commercial,
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but I'm guessing that's off the cards now.
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-Yeah.
-We have a meeting today
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with an advertising agency.
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They've got a client who wants
to base a fragrance on you.
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Why would I want to do that?
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Lots of celebrities have them.
Paris Hilton, David Beckham...
73
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-The Pope Benedict.
-What?
74
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Pope really have a fragrance?
What's it called?
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It's called Benedictus.
76
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-Ugh!
-Yeah.
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Can you imagine
what it was like growing up
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knowing that David Hasselhoff is my dad?
79
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But the problem was that none
of the kids would believe me,
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and then they would hit me,
and then one of them
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puts poo-poo in my bag,
82
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which is very annoying, because
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it's so hard to wash out
the smell of the shit.
84
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All right, mate? Can I help you?
85
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-Hello.
-Hello.
86
00:04:03,240 --> 00:04:04,960
-You are Terry?
-Yes.
87
00:04:05,040 --> 00:04:07,720
Yeah, my dad tell me to come down.
88
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Your dad? Well, who's your dad?
89
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-Uh, David Hasselhoff.
-What?
90
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-Yes.
-You're David Hasselhoff's son?
91
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Ja, I'm his son.
92
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I mean, out of complete respect, mate,
93
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so you used to actually
live in the Hoff's nutsack?
94
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-Mmm.
-Fucking hell. Hasselhoff.
95
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You've got the name, you must be... Yeah?
96
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You must be getting all the action, yeah?
97
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You must be getting
all the sweet punana, am I right?
98
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-Um...
-Sex, mate.
99
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-You getting a lot of sex?
-Um... What?
100
00:04:35,440 --> 00:04:37,880
Oh, look, there's Daddy.
Let me go get Daddy.
101
00:04:44,080 --> 00:04:45,320
[David Hasselhoff] Yeah,
how long is this gonna take?
102
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Because, you know,
I'm just not in the mood.
103
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I'm not in the mood, okay?
104
00:04:49,840 --> 00:04:51,000
So, let's just get through this quickly.
105
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Oh, please tell me,
please tell me... It is!
106
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[scatting]
107
00:04:55,400 --> 00:04:58,280
David effing Hasselhoff in the house!
108
00:04:58,360 --> 00:05:01,400
Give me some skin, my man!
We've got a lifesaving mo-fo! Boom!
109
00:05:01,480 --> 00:05:02,880
Dylan Turnbull at your service.
110
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My God! Look at this! I am not worthy.
111
00:05:05,160 --> 00:05:08,440
Michael Knight in the freaking house!
112
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Hi.
113
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"Hi," he says. Listen to him,
he's so humble. Touch that!
114
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Touch that. Feel that? Hairs are on end.
115
00:05:16,360 --> 00:05:19,880
Seriously, I kid you not, we have
been working like rabid little dogs
116
00:05:19,960 --> 00:05:22,480
to get this done, and we are excited!
117
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Who else is excited? You excited?
118
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He's excited. Look at that! I can tell.
119
00:05:25,560 --> 00:05:27,920
Believe you me, the client is pumped.
120
00:05:28,000 --> 00:05:30,960
We have been moving oceans,
seriously, oceans.
121
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It's been like a book from
the Old Testament,
122
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or like the first one or something,
123
00:05:33,880 --> 00:05:36,240
but it's here and we are going to shoot
this campaign today, yeah?
124
00:05:36,320 --> 00:05:38,320
We're not shooting today.
What are you talking about?
125
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Well, we are shooting a campaign today.
126
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It's been scheduled for weeks.
127
00:05:41,760 --> 00:05:45,680
No. No. We're not shooting today.
I'm not ready to shoot today.
128
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Why does he think he's not shooting today?
129
00:05:47,240 --> 00:05:49,200
Harriet, we are not shooting today.
130
00:05:49,280 --> 00:05:50,800
On the schedule, we are shooting today.
131
00:05:50,880 --> 00:05:53,760
Max, tell them we're not shooting today.
132
00:05:53,840 --> 00:05:56,720
Right, can everyone just be
quiet for just a second?
133
00:05:56,800 --> 00:05:57,920
That one. You.
134
00:06:01,280 --> 00:06:02,280
Are we shooting today?
135
00:06:02,360 --> 00:06:03,520
Yes, you know we are shooting today,
136
00:06:03,600 --> 00:06:06,960
because I have been sending you ideas
for the last four months.
137
00:06:08,280 --> 00:06:10,560
What format did you send them in?
138
00:06:13,800 --> 00:06:17,160
Email, but we confirmed this months ago.
139
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Right.
140
00:06:18,960 --> 00:06:20,040
Hmm.
141
00:06:20,120 --> 00:06:22,120
See, I don't do my business
by email normally.
142
00:06:22,200 --> 00:06:24,800
What the fuck? What do you mean
you don't... What is this, the 1950s?
143
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Do you have any idea
how much this is costing?
144
00:06:28,520 --> 00:06:31,600
So you're definitely saying
that I confirmed by email.
145
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You did, yeah. I printed it out.
146
00:06:34,240 --> 00:06:36,120
Thank you. Thank you.
147
00:06:36,760 --> 00:06:38,720
Thanks for that, Harriet.
I really appreciate it.
148
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I think there was a week
that I just, like, lost to peyote.
149
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Stand there. Just stand there.
150
00:06:45,160 --> 00:06:48,000
Hoff's team seem like
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they've just escaped from a dogs' home.
152
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I've never known anything quite like it.
153
00:06:51,560 --> 00:06:52,840
I mean, who mixes up emails?
154
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Who doesn't even receive emails?
155
00:06:55,080 --> 00:06:56,840
The man was on peyote.
156
00:06:57,880 --> 00:06:59,920
Do you know what, David?
We're going to sort this.
157
00:07:00,000 --> 00:07:01,120
I'll tell you what we're gonna do,
158
00:07:01,200 --> 00:07:02,720
is I'm gonna to take you
through our current thinking.
159
00:07:02,800 --> 00:07:05,040
We'll run you guys up to
the boardroom and, my God,
160
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once you see this presentation,
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you're gonna... Oh, my God, you're
gonna fall in love with it.
162
00:07:08,640 --> 00:07:10,360
It is so freaking huge.
Do you know what, David?
163
00:07:10,440 --> 00:07:12,120
I have walked away
from my daughter's first sports day.
164
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Do you know why? This is better.
165
00:07:14,760 --> 00:07:16,160
I mean, I don't want to see
a group of six-year-olds
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throwing around a bean bag, do you?
167
00:07:17,320 --> 00:07:19,920
Well, I certainly don't.
Come on, Let's do this.
168
00:07:23,080 --> 00:07:24,640
We're shooting today?
169
00:07:25,040 --> 00:07:27,120
Yeah, if you want to. Yeah, all right.
170
00:07:31,720 --> 00:07:32,960
Oh, my God!
171
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[Max] David is here toresurrect his career.
172
00:07:36,400 --> 00:07:42,160
Right now, I am standing over
David's corpse,
173
00:07:42,240 --> 00:07:45,840
and the only person
who could save him is me,
174
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because I am trained in entertainment CPR.
175
00:07:50,640 --> 00:07:52,720
Sorry about this. I wasn't
expecting to do this today,
176
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but you know, anything for the Hoff!
177
00:07:54,760 --> 00:07:57,320
You do realise you spelt my name wrong?
178
00:07:57,400 --> 00:08:01,240
-Is that not how you spell it?
-No, it's E-L.
179
00:08:01,320 --> 00:08:02,320
Oh!
180
00:08:02,400 --> 00:08:05,040
-Do you like pigeons? Mmm.
-Pigeons?
181
00:08:05,120 --> 00:08:08,160
You know, when I was a kid,
I made a metal contraption.
182
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I put that on the beak of one
of my favourite pigeons, Franz.
183
00:08:12,600 --> 00:08:15,720
Ja. And then we could force
a postcard inside
184
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-to send it to my dad.
-What? And did he make it?
185
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No, he died.
186
00:08:23,240 --> 00:08:26,720
Bang, big dramatic opening.
Who is David Hasselhoff?
187
00:08:27,080 --> 00:08:29,760
It's a question we've been
asking ourselves a lot recently.
188
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Some of the best guys we've had on this.
189
00:08:31,360 --> 00:08:32,960
But don't get bogged down
with what we think.
190
00:08:33,040 --> 00:08:34,720
What do the people think?
Let's get involved.
191
00:08:34,800 --> 00:08:40,360
So, most common answer from
males over 25, with 24% reach, was,
192
00:08:40,440 --> 00:08:42,680
"It's that guy from Knight Rider".
193
00:08:42,760 --> 00:08:44,320
Is that it? That's why we here?
194
00:08:44,400 --> 00:08:46,280
So, what's the common answer
with kids under 11?
195
00:08:46,360 --> 00:08:49,840
They said, "I don't know who he is.
I don't know who he is."
196
00:08:49,920 --> 00:08:55,000
So, guys under 25, when asked,
"What does the Hoff most remind you of?"
197
00:08:55,080 --> 00:08:57,880
Most common answer, by far,
was a leather sofa.
198
00:08:57,960 --> 00:09:00,920
A leather sofa? What the hell
is he talking about?
199
00:09:01,000 --> 00:09:02,200
That's actually quite a nice sofa.
200
00:09:02,280 --> 00:09:04,920
Men over 30 who live at home.
201
00:09:05,400 --> 00:09:06,960
Do you want to see what
these guys look Like?
202
00:09:07,040 --> 00:09:09,280
Look, they have a little bit... That's
just... They're depressing.
203
00:09:09,360 --> 00:09:12,000
These guys are known as the unreachables,
204
00:09:12,080 --> 00:09:14,680
and what we are just literally
cumming in our pants over
205
00:09:14,760 --> 00:09:17,640
is that David can reach them.
206
00:09:18,240 --> 00:09:19,880
David Hasselhoff...
207
00:09:21,080 --> 00:09:24,960
...is the perfect spokesman
for this demographic.
208
00:09:25,040 --> 00:09:26,240
"How are our clients going to
209
00:09:26,320 --> 00:09:27,640
''sell these guys aftershave?"
you may ask.
210
00:09:27,720 --> 00:09:30,000
It's a good question.
It's got to be exactly like the Hoff.
211
00:09:30,080 --> 00:09:32,800
And of course it's got to be... Bang!
212
00:09:32,880 --> 00:09:34,280
It's got to say danger.
213
00:09:34,360 --> 00:09:35,720
They are going to want to be like you,
214
00:09:35,800 --> 00:09:37,440
they are going to want to smell like you,
215
00:09:37,520 --> 00:09:40,240
and this story will the good
man teach his son,
216
00:09:40,320 --> 00:09:43,560
and the name of
David Hasselhoff shall ne'er go by
217
00:09:43,640 --> 00:09:46,000
from this day
until the ending of the world.
218
00:09:46,080 --> 00:09:47,080
What's it going to be called?
219
00:09:47,160 --> 00:09:50,200
It's going to be called Be More Hoff.
220
00:09:50,280 --> 00:09:52,080
That is what we're going
to be shooting today.
221
00:09:52,160 --> 00:09:55,000
What do you guys say? Yeah! Bang!
222
00:09:56,680 --> 00:09:57,720
Thank you.
223
00:09:57,800 --> 00:09:58,800
If you don't mind, we're just going to
224
00:09:58,880 --> 00:10:00,200
-have a quick word outside.
-Yeah.
225
00:10:00,280 --> 00:10:02,160
I think the presentation went phenomenal.
226
00:10:02,240 --> 00:10:04,880
Um, I mean, I am one of the
best pitchmen in the business.
227
00:10:04,960 --> 00:10:07,040
Of that, there is absolutely no doubt.
228
00:10:07,120 --> 00:10:08,360
And that's not arrogance.
That's the truth.
229
00:10:08,440 --> 00:10:11,360
What the fuck is he talking about?
"Be more fucking Hoff."
230
00:10:11,440 --> 00:10:13,160
What is that, huh? What is that?
231
00:10:13,240 --> 00:10:15,760
I know it's not exactly
what you are after.
232
00:10:15,840 --> 00:10:19,720
That presentation is exactly what
I'm trying to get away from, okay?
233
00:10:19,800 --> 00:10:22,160
"Be More Hoff." How can I be more Hoff?
234
00:10:22,320 --> 00:10:24,440
-You. Ballpark. [imitates bat hitting]
-I thought that was all right.
235
00:10:24,520 --> 00:10:25,640
-Straight out.
-I thought that was OKAY.
236
00:10:25,880 --> 00:10:27,560
Have you signed the contract?
237
00:10:27,640 --> 00:10:29,600
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
238
00:10:29,680 --> 00:10:33,000
I was... Yeah, I was... I signed a lot.
239
00:10:33,720 --> 00:10:36,520
All right, all right. I'm only doing this
240
00:10:36,600 --> 00:10:38,600
because I need the money, but nothing
241
00:10:38,680 --> 00:10:41,680
in this commercial can be
in reference to the '80s, okay?
242
00:10:41,760 --> 00:10:46,120
No more... No more
leather jackets, okay? You promise?
243
00:10:46,200 --> 00:10:47,520
I promise.
There's not going to be any cheese.
244
00:10:47,600 --> 00:10:48,640
Yeah.
245
00:10:48,720 --> 00:10:50,960
No embarrassing make-up,
nothing like that.
246
00:10:57,920 --> 00:11:02,280
Oh, wow! Oh, you actually look
quite, um, Shakespearean.
247
00:11:02,360 --> 00:11:04,600
I look like a clown.
248
00:11:04,680 --> 00:11:07,160
No, no, honestly, you look good.
249
00:11:07,240 --> 00:11:09,440
Is that... Are you wearing make-up?
250
00:11:11,080 --> 00:11:12,200
[laughing]
251
00:11:13,480 --> 00:11:16,240
Look at this! Oh, my God,
you look incredible!
252
00:11:16,320 --> 00:11:18,360
Very horny. Very horny!
253
00:11:19,600 --> 00:11:21,280
Dylan. Can I just remind you,
254
00:11:21,360 --> 00:11:24,360
obviously, it's really important
that we keep the advert really classy.
255
00:11:24,440 --> 00:11:27,160
Yeah. Well, you know, classy is a word.
256
00:11:27,240 --> 00:11:30,040
Wouldn't necessarily use it right
now, but it's good
257
00:11:30,120 --> 00:11:32,080
job of pointing it out.
I'm going to tweet that.
258
00:11:32,680 --> 00:11:33,880
Do not tweet that.
259
00:11:33,960 --> 00:11:35,560
Tweeted. I've got two favourites.
260
00:11:36,040 --> 00:11:38,200
Ah, Wi-Fi is quick here.
261
00:11:38,520 --> 00:11:40,840
He did look like a twat,
but at least, you know,
262
00:11:40,920 --> 00:11:42,880
at least they didn't get him to black up.
263
00:11:42,960 --> 00:11:44,760
I've had that with clients before.
264
00:11:44,840 --> 00:11:48,000
Dad's costume at the
photographic studio was great.
265
00:11:48,080 --> 00:11:51,440
It was totally perfect. It was spot on.
266
00:11:52,120 --> 00:11:53,680
What was he supposed to be?
267
00:11:54,200 --> 00:11:57,800
This is not helping my career.
268
00:11:58,120 --> 00:11:59,800
It's helping our bank balance.
269
00:11:59,920 --> 00:12:01,200
[growling]
270
00:12:01,320 --> 00:12:03,640
So difficult to tell
whether you're genuinely angry
271
00:12:03,720 --> 00:12:06,040
or that's just the make-up.
272
00:12:06,120 --> 00:12:10,000
OKAY, I'm going to finish your
shit from earlier today,
273
00:12:10,080 --> 00:12:11,640
and I'll be back later.
274
00:12:15,840 --> 00:12:18,280
Uh, Mr Hasselhoff?
Hi. I'm Ellie, the runner.
275
00:12:18,360 --> 00:12:19,720
Just wondering if I could do
a short interview?
276
00:12:19,800 --> 00:12:21,680
It's about the multimedia
campaign, if that's all right.
277
00:12:21,760 --> 00:12:23,520
I don't mean to offend you,
278
00:12:23,600 --> 00:12:25,880
but I'm really not in the mood
for an interview right now.
279
00:12:25,960 --> 00:12:28,920
-Can we do one later, please?
-Oh, OKAY, yeah.
280
00:12:29,720 --> 00:12:31,600
He's not really in the mood
for an interview right now.
281
00:12:31,680 --> 00:12:35,520
David, so you're going to be the
devil, and so what we're going to do
282
00:12:35,600 --> 00:12:37,760
is put you over our loser's shoulder,
283
00:12:37,840 --> 00:12:39,240
so you can be hovering over him,
284
00:12:39,320 --> 00:12:42,760
um, and I want you to think Dante.
285
00:12:42,960 --> 00:12:45,320
Yeah? I want you to think,
like, nine levels of hell,
286
00:12:45,400 --> 00:12:47,760
I want you to think, like,
Hieronymus Bosch.
287
00:12:47,840 --> 00:12:49,960
There's, like, a broken egg
with someone falling out of its arse.
288
00:12:50,040 --> 00:12:54,600
I mean, really unpleasant,
like, nasty, sorrow... Ugh!
289
00:12:54,680 --> 00:12:56,280
But keep it here.
290
00:12:56,360 --> 00:12:58,800
Come on. Roll the cameras,
show me the product,
291
00:12:58,880 --> 00:13:02,320
tell me where my...
Hit my mark. Let me turn the Hoff on.
292
00:13:02,400 --> 00:13:07,240
Now look, the object of his affection is
going to be our pneumatic blonde.
293
00:13:07,320 --> 00:13:09,160
[wolf whistling]
294
00:13:09,520 --> 00:13:11,480
Sorry, I shouldn't have done that. Sorry.
295
00:13:11,560 --> 00:13:14,480
The object of our
loser's affections, OKAY?
296
00:13:14,560 --> 00:13:18,480
Um, he can't go, OKAY,
cos he doesn't have any confidence,
297
00:13:18,560 --> 00:13:20,240
but few little sprits of
298
00:13:20,320 --> 00:13:24,120
Be More Hoff and hey presto,
bang, confidence! Yeah?
299
00:13:24,760 --> 00:13:28,320
Be More Hoff. Have you got the
bottle? It should be here.
300
00:13:28,400 --> 00:13:31,960
Hi, literally, you press
that twice, one, two. Then that lights.
301
00:13:32,040 --> 00:13:33,200
[David Hasselhoff] Is that a joke?
302
00:13:33,280 --> 00:13:34,720
It's great, isn't it? It's very clever!
303
00:13:34,800 --> 00:13:37,360
Be More Hoff! Oh, wait! It talks!
304
00:13:37,440 --> 00:13:38,600
Turbo boost, Michael!
305
00:13:38,680 --> 00:13:41,640
"Turbo boost, Michael!"
Are you kidding me?
306
00:13:41,720 --> 00:13:44,520
Are you really kidding me?
This has got to be a joke.
307
00:13:44,600 --> 00:13:46,520
No, Look. We'll just pop you
on the chair just behind,
308
00:13:46,600 --> 00:13:48,520
and remember, devil. Argh!
309
00:13:48,600 --> 00:13:50,880
We got it? You ready? Action, David!
310
00:13:50,960 --> 00:13:54,400
You know when it's midnight and
you're the only one at the bar,
311
00:13:54,480 --> 00:13:57,720
and there happens to be
a drop-dead gorgeous girl
312
00:13:57,800 --> 00:13:58,920
sitting across from you?
313
00:13:59,000 --> 00:14:00,600
It's a stills shoot, David.
314
00:14:00,680 --> 00:14:02,640
-I suggest...
-Still shoot.
315
00:14:02,720 --> 00:14:03,880
...Be More Hoff!
316
00:14:03,960 --> 00:14:06,720
And pause, and pause,
and just bigger, just bigger.
317
00:14:06,800 --> 00:14:10,120
That bit, bigger. No, don't start
again. It's a stills shoot, David.
318
00:14:10,200 --> 00:14:11,840
[David Hasselhoff] You might need
a little help to get her attention.
319
00:14:11,920 --> 00:14:14,760
-It's a stills shoot.
-My name is David Hasselhoff.
320
00:14:14,840 --> 00:14:16,480
-Try, Be More Hoff.
-It's a still...
321
00:14:16,560 --> 00:14:18,480
Some people call me the Hoff.
322
00:14:18,560 --> 00:14:21,400
It's a stills shoot.
Stop! Stop. There. That's it!
323
00:14:21,480 --> 00:14:23,680
And there's a gorgeous girl
sitting across from you...
324
00:14:23,760 --> 00:14:26,040
Not the words, just the still.
325
00:14:26,120 --> 00:14:27,840
You might need a little help.
326
00:14:27,920 --> 00:14:30,040
-It's a stills shoot.
-Still.
327
00:14:30,120 --> 00:14:31,280
I need... Okay, we'll stop.
328
00:14:31,360 --> 00:14:33,240
David just didn't get it.
329
00:14:33,320 --> 00:14:35,480
He just didn't get the not moving.
330
00:14:35,560 --> 00:14:37,080
And I found that very strange.
331
00:14:37,160 --> 00:14:39,240
I have worked with some
phenomenal actors who can't stand still,
332
00:14:39,320 --> 00:14:43,640
but usually if you say, "Stand still,"
333
00:14:43,720 --> 00:14:44,960
they stand still.
334
00:14:45,840 --> 00:14:48,280
-Is... Is everything all right?
-Yeah, everything's fine.
335
00:14:48,360 --> 00:14:49,360
Sure? Not too hot?
336
00:14:49,440 --> 00:14:51,080
-No, I feel great.
-You don't want anything?
337
00:14:51,160 --> 00:14:52,960
I'll do the stills later.
We'll get the motion picture...
338
00:14:53,040 --> 00:14:55,680
This... This is a stills shoot.
339
00:14:55,760 --> 00:14:59,040
-No, it's not. It's not a stills shoot.
-No, it is.
340
00:14:59,120 --> 00:15:03,160
Max! Is this a stills shoot?
This is a commercial.
341
00:15:03,240 --> 00:15:05,080
I think... Do you know, sometimes...
342
00:15:05,160 --> 00:15:07,840
Have you ever played the game
Chinese whispers?
343
00:15:07,920 --> 00:15:09,520
[David Hasselhoff]
What are you talking about?
344
00:15:09,640 --> 00:15:11,400
They're just crossed wires.
345
00:15:11,480 --> 00:15:14,240
-David, take five. Give it five minutes.
-No!
346
00:15:14,320 --> 00:15:17,680
Seriously, five minutes. Ellie, just get
some of the echinacea and bilberry.
347
00:15:17,760 --> 00:15:20,120
The ones from my office. My one, okay.
Just sit down five minutes.
348
00:15:20,280 --> 00:15:21,480
-[machine chatting]
-[David Hasselhoff] How do you
349
00:15:21,560 --> 00:15:24,280
-shut this thing up? Stop it!
-We'll have a little chat, all right?
350
00:15:24,480 --> 00:15:26,720
-Stop it!
-[Max] You're doing really well, David.
351
00:15:26,800 --> 00:15:28,960
-Turn off, off! Turn off!
-Turbo boost, Michael!
352
00:15:29,040 --> 00:15:30,160
This is costing an absolute fortune.
353
00:15:30,240 --> 00:15:31,320
Steve has come all the way
354
00:15:31,400 --> 00:15:32,480
-from Bulgaria for this!
-Yes.
355
00:15:32,560 --> 00:15:36,920
Um, I apologise. This is not
supposed to be a stills shoot.
356
00:15:37,000 --> 00:15:38,840
This is supposed to be
a proper commercial, okay?
357
00:15:38,920 --> 00:15:41,480
Now, whatever you have to do...
Whatever you have to do
358
00:15:41,560 --> 00:15:45,040
-to get him to stay still, do it.
-Yeah.
359
00:15:45,120 --> 00:15:49,800
Okay, sometimes, like,
a load of Nytols works if you put...
360
00:15:49,880 --> 00:15:51,120
And he'll just stay still.
361
00:15:51,200 --> 00:15:52,920
-Whatever it takes, Max, okay?
-Yeah.
362
00:15:53,600 --> 00:15:55,680
-Hi.
-Hi.
363
00:16:02,600 --> 00:16:07,080
I forgot to say, you know
the sound of the wood pigeon? Uh...
364
00:16:08,040 --> 00:16:09,280
-I can...
-Yes?
365
00:16:09,360 --> 00:16:12,200
[imitates pigeon]
366
00:16:15,880 --> 00:16:22,000
Do you... Do you want,
um, anything from the vending machine?
367
00:16:22,080 --> 00:16:24,560
'Cause I'm going to go
and get a Double Decker.
368
00:16:24,640 --> 00:16:27,440
Mmm, yes, thanks. I would like one.
369
00:16:28,480 --> 00:16:30,160
Just one decker.
370
00:16:30,360 --> 00:16:33,920
Baywatch was a very intellectual show
371
00:16:34,000 --> 00:16:37,480
about lifeguards
and saving people's lives.
372
00:16:37,560 --> 00:16:40,120
Hello again. Sorry, do you
mind if we do the interview now?
373
00:16:40,200 --> 00:16:41,240
Would that be all right?
374
00:16:41,320 --> 00:16:44,520
Um, no, it's fine. Let's get it over with.
375
00:16:44,600 --> 00:16:47,440
Great! I'm just going to stick
a little cheeky mic to you,
376
00:16:47,680 --> 00:16:49,240
um, just on your chest,
if that's all right?
377
00:16:49,320 --> 00:16:52,920
Yeah! That's fine.
Anywhere you want. Okay, all right.
378
00:16:53,160 --> 00:16:56,440
-Okay, great. Thanks.
-Just going to tuck my own on...
379
00:16:56,520 --> 00:16:59,640
So you must be really excited to be part
of the Be More Hoff campaign.
380
00:16:59,720 --> 00:17:02,560
Oh, I'm really excited.
I mean, it's a new level of...
381
00:17:02,640 --> 00:17:04,400
-Oh, sorry, I have to cut.
-What's wrong?
382
00:17:04,480 --> 00:17:08,480
I can't hear anything. I think maybe
it's, like, the mic or the hair.
383
00:17:08,560 --> 00:17:09,600
Okay.
384
00:17:09,680 --> 00:17:15,040
Ow! Whoa! Wow! Wow, wow.
Why would you do that?
385
00:17:16,760 --> 00:17:18,960
[David Hasselhoff] I'm probablyhaving the worst day
386
00:17:19,880 --> 00:17:21,480
I've had since I was seven years old.
387
00:17:25,280 --> 00:17:26,320
[Dieter] Are you OKAY?
388
00:17:26,400 --> 00:17:30,400
Just got half my hair
ripped off by a sound girl.
389
00:17:30,960 --> 00:17:34,360
-Did she hurt you?
-Yeah, she hurt me, but, uh,
390
00:17:34,440 --> 00:17:37,200
you know, I'm a man.
391
00:17:37,280 --> 00:17:39,640
Sometimes I like getting hurt.
And you know what?
392
00:17:40,400 --> 00:17:42,080
Sometimes they like to get hurt too.
393
00:17:42,880 --> 00:17:43,920
[David Hasselhoff] Sit down, buddy.
394
00:17:44,000 --> 00:17:46,160
[Dieter] I don't think I willever understand women.
395
00:17:46,240 --> 00:17:48,120
I don't understand them either, pal.
396
00:17:48,680 --> 00:17:50,360
I do know one thing.
397
00:17:50,880 --> 00:17:52,960
A lot of women play hard to get.
398
00:17:53,600 --> 00:17:55,560
-Yeah.
-But they want to be gotten.
399
00:17:55,720 --> 00:17:57,760
And sometimes, us men
400
00:17:57,960 --> 00:18:00,080
know more about what women are thinking
401
00:18:00,160 --> 00:18:01,280
than what they're thinking.
402
00:18:01,360 --> 00:18:03,520
Best part of my day was
that blonde out there.
403
00:18:03,600 --> 00:18:05,320
She was... [whistles]
404
00:18:05,400 --> 00:18:07,440
Sure would like to get her
in the back seat of my KITT car.
405
00:18:14,960 --> 00:18:16,040
You know what I think of advertising?
406
00:18:16,120 --> 00:18:17,640
It's for scum.
407
00:18:17,720 --> 00:18:21,040
Right, Max, he'll take
whatever's being offered.
408
00:18:21,120 --> 00:18:24,640
I'm offering to get the Hoff to Neeson
level, you know what I mean?
409
00:18:24,720 --> 00:18:28,280
Taken 4? Neeson's not doing it.
I've found that out.
410
00:18:28,360 --> 00:18:29,640
Max know that? No.
411
00:18:29,720 --> 00:18:32,800
-Sting, older or younger than you?
-Younger.
412
00:18:32,880 --> 00:18:36,520
Incorrect. Same age.
Seagal? Older or younger than you?
413
00:18:36,600 --> 00:18:39,760
-Older.
-Same age. Neeson? Older or younger?
414
00:18:39,840 --> 00:18:41,360
-Older.
-Same age.
415
00:18:41,440 --> 00:18:44,320
Oh, come on!
Liam Neeson doesn't look as good as me.
416
00:18:44,400 --> 00:18:45,720
He looks better than you.
417
00:18:45,800 --> 00:18:48,840
You ever thought of doing a sort
of Taken style action film?
418
00:18:48,920 --> 00:18:50,040
Dude, I'm the Knight Rider.
419
00:18:50,120 --> 00:18:51,720
I'm not talking about something
420
00:18:51,800 --> 00:18:54,600
where you have a homoerotic
relationship with a sat nav.
421
00:18:54,680 --> 00:18:57,720
I'm talking proper action.
Neeson is very dynamic.
422
00:18:57,800 --> 00:19:00,280
He moved from the Holocaust
to an action star.
423
00:19:00,360 --> 00:19:02,520
You moved out of a car
and put on some red shorts.
424
00:19:02,600 --> 00:19:04,320
It's not the same, is it?
425
00:19:04,400 --> 00:19:07,440
Every cell in your body
changes over seven years.
426
00:19:07,520 --> 00:19:10,880
That means the man you are today is not
the man you were seven years ago.
427
00:19:10,960 --> 00:19:13,240
You regenerate or you die.
You have no choice.
428
00:19:13,560 --> 00:19:15,720
-Renew or die, do you understand?
-Yeah.
429
00:19:15,800 --> 00:19:17,280
Say it with me. Renew or die.
430
00:19:17,360 --> 00:19:20,680
-Renew or die. Renew or die.
-Renew or die. Louder!
431
00:19:20,760 --> 00:19:22,120
-Renew or die.
-Mean it!
432
00:19:22,200 --> 00:19:25,680
Renew or die, renew or die, renew or die.
433
00:19:28,040 --> 00:19:29,080
[door opens]
434
00:19:29,160 --> 00:19:30,640
You all sitting down? Good.
435
00:19:31,040 --> 00:19:32,680
Right, I think we've got
a bit of a situation here.
436
00:19:32,880 --> 00:19:35,160
Gawker have got hold
of a recording of something
437
00:19:35,240 --> 00:19:37,200
you said yesterday and they're trying to
turn it into a scandal.
438
00:19:37,280 --> 00:19:38,680
Twitter is going mental.
439
00:19:38,760 --> 00:19:41,920
"Can't believe Michael Knight
is talking like a sex pest!"
440
00:19:42,000 --> 00:19:45,440
Um, here's another one,
"What is the Hoff's problem with women?
441
00:19:45,520 --> 00:19:47,080
"He's a Neolithic idiot!"
442
00:19:47,160 --> 00:19:50,160
And they've leaked
a photo of you dressed as the devil.
443
00:19:50,800 --> 00:19:52,200
[David Hasselhoff] "Jerk H'off"?
444
00:19:52,280 --> 00:19:53,800
[Harriet] I came as quickly as I could.
445
00:19:53,920 --> 00:19:56,120
Apparently, David's been saying stuff
446
00:19:56,200 --> 00:19:57,720
about what women really want
447
00:19:57,800 --> 00:20:02,040
and that he got some girl
in the back of his, uh, KITT car.
448
00:20:02,120 --> 00:20:03,760
Is that really true, David?
449
00:20:03,840 --> 00:20:06,960
Uh... Yeah, I did,
but I was talking to Dieter.
450
00:20:07,040 --> 00:20:09,120
Private conversation in the dressing room.
451
00:20:09,440 --> 00:20:11,200
That runner must have
left the microphone on.
452
00:20:11,280 --> 00:20:13,880
I'm thinking this could
be a positive thing. You're trending.
453
00:20:13,960 --> 00:20:15,360
I'm trending! What's wrong with that?
454
00:20:15,440 --> 00:20:16,920
"David Hasselhoff is a bell end."
455
00:20:17,000 --> 00:20:18,720
Well, great! What's a bell end?
456
00:20:20,600 --> 00:20:23,800
Well it... I mean...
Anatomically speaking, it's the end of...
457
00:20:23,880 --> 00:20:25,680
It's the end of the male genitalia.
458
00:20:25,760 --> 00:20:29,320
-She called me a dick?
-Well, etymology has changed...
459
00:20:29,400 --> 00:20:32,160
-It's like the crown. It's the...
-I've got it, I've got it.
460
00:20:32,240 --> 00:20:35,160
Just get me an interview on radio or TV
and I'll set the record straight.
461
00:20:35,240 --> 00:20:37,680
-Right. And you're going to apologise.
-For what?
462
00:20:37,760 --> 00:20:40,320
I'm gonna tell my side of the story.
Get me an interview.
463
00:20:40,400 --> 00:20:41,880
-Thank you very much.
-I'll sort it.
464
00:20:41,960 --> 00:20:43,000
[David Hasselhoff] Bell end!
465
00:20:43,760 --> 00:20:46,240
Misogynistic?
Look, I'm not even sure what that means,
466
00:20:46,320 --> 00:20:48,240
but he definitely
wasn't misogynistic, yeah?
467
00:20:48,320 --> 00:20:49,400
Something to do with women, innit?
468
00:20:49,480 --> 00:20:51,560
The thing about my dad
is that he could have
469
00:20:51,640 --> 00:20:53,880
any girl in the world that he wants.
470
00:20:53,960 --> 00:20:55,680
But he's only had five wives.
471
00:20:55,760 --> 00:20:58,400
I've heard it said
that all publicity is good publicity.
472
00:20:58,480 --> 00:21:00,840
It's not! Just ask, um,
473
00:21:01,440 --> 00:21:05,080
any DJ from the 1970s.
474
00:21:05,160 --> 00:21:07,920
[Harriet] So, contemporary
feminist perception is focused on the way
475
00:21:08,000 --> 00:21:11,040
that gender interacts
with other social characteristics,
476
00:21:11,120 --> 00:21:15,840
so then this produces a very specific
experience of inequality, so...
477
00:21:15,920 --> 00:21:16,920
I got it.
478
00:21:17,640 --> 00:21:20,920
-Oh! That's Lucinda Young.
-Who's Lucinda Young?
479
00:21:21,000 --> 00:21:23,400
Well, she's a journalist.
I actually read her book,
480
00:21:23,480 --> 00:21:25,280
Grappling with the Infantile Man.
481
00:21:25,360 --> 00:21:27,600
Hi! So sorry to interrupt.
482
00:21:27,680 --> 00:21:30,360
I just wanted to say
I'm a massive fan of Baywatch.
483
00:21:32,000 --> 00:21:34,160
And Baywatch Nights, obviously.
484
00:21:35,120 --> 00:21:36,240
Well, nice to meet you.
485
00:21:36,320 --> 00:21:38,720
Anyone who's a fan
of Baywatch Nights is cool.
486
00:21:38,800 --> 00:21:41,080
-What are you doing here?
-I'm on the show with you, David.
487
00:21:41,160 --> 00:21:43,360
-Oh, that's terrific. Great.
-Yeah, it should be good fun.
488
00:21:43,440 --> 00:21:45,040
-Good fun.
-See you in the studio.
489
00:21:45,120 --> 00:21:46,520
-Great. Thank you.
-All right.
490
00:21:46,600 --> 00:21:47,920
-Hi, I'm...
-Hi.
491
00:21:48,080 --> 00:21:49,960
[Dylan] Moving down the corridor now.
492
00:21:50,040 --> 00:21:51,360
Oh, God!
493
00:21:51,440 --> 00:21:55,160
Feels like I'm being pulled like a
satellite moon towards the gas giant.
494
00:21:55,240 --> 00:21:57,920
I'm with David now. Okay, bye-bye.
495
00:21:58,000 --> 00:22:00,200
-Hey!
-Hey! Oh, joy.
496
00:22:00,280 --> 00:22:02,040
Yeah. Well, the clients
thought I should be here.
497
00:22:02,120 --> 00:22:03,240
You know, show you some support,
498
00:22:03,320 --> 00:22:06,000
wish you good luck and everything else
like that. You go get 'em, tiger!
499
00:22:06,080 --> 00:22:09,280
One thing, though, is,
could you apologise?
500
00:22:09,640 --> 00:22:12,720
Um, I think the clients thought your
comments were a little bit misogynistic,
501
00:22:12,800 --> 00:22:15,920
so enjoy it,
um, but do make sure you apologise.
502
00:22:16,000 --> 00:22:18,160
What I said was taken out of context.
503
00:22:18,680 --> 00:22:20,440
Um, David, they need you
in the studio now.
504
00:22:20,840 --> 00:22:22,840
Go, enjoy it! You have fun!
505
00:22:22,920 --> 00:22:26,800
All right, go on, get out of here.
Say you're sorry, all right?
506
00:22:27,720 --> 00:22:28,920
I'll be here.
507
00:22:30,200 --> 00:22:31,200
[sighs]
508
00:22:32,120 --> 00:22:33,640
It's a good name
for a fragrance, actually.
509
00:22:34,360 --> 00:22:36,240
-What's that?
-Misogynistique.
510
00:22:39,280 --> 00:22:40,960
-Yeah?
-Hmm.
511
00:22:41,880 --> 00:22:43,520
-I'll go and, uh...
-Yeah.
512
00:22:44,080 --> 00:22:45,720
All right, junior. Don't worry, yeah?
513
00:22:45,800 --> 00:22:46,960
Your dad's going to be great.
514
00:22:47,040 --> 00:22:49,640
He's going to tell them
lesbians to fuck right off.
515
00:22:49,720 --> 00:22:51,040
They are feminist.
516
00:22:51,120 --> 00:22:53,120
Yeah, feminist, lesbians, innit? The same.
517
00:22:53,200 --> 00:22:55,440
We are joined by David Hasselhoff.
518
00:22:55,520 --> 00:22:58,480
He's causing headlines.
He's causing controversy as well.
519
00:22:58,560 --> 00:23:00,160
You've no doubt seen
these comments he's made.
520
00:23:00,240 --> 00:23:03,600
These misogynistic comments
which were recorded on tape,
521
00:23:03,680 --> 00:23:06,800
and then leaked to the press.
Welcome to the programme.
522
00:23:06,880 --> 00:23:09,200
Thank you. Hey, KITT, pick me up, buddy.
523
00:23:09,280 --> 00:23:10,320
[chuckles]
524
00:23:10,400 --> 00:23:12,040
As I say, these comments are everywhere.
525
00:23:12,120 --> 00:23:14,560
They're all over social media,
and you'd probably also be aware
526
00:23:14,640 --> 00:23:16,760
that some people today
are calling you a woman-hater.
527
00:23:16,840 --> 00:23:18,560
-How do you respond to that?
-No, ridiculous.
528
00:23:18,640 --> 00:23:20,120
Some of my best friends are women.
529
00:23:20,200 --> 00:23:21,880
I love everything about women.
530
00:23:21,960 --> 00:23:23,520
-Oh, wow!
-Almost everything.
531
00:23:23,600 --> 00:23:26,640
The "Oh, wow" you've heard
there is from Lucinda Young.
532
00:23:26,800 --> 00:23:29,000
Lucinda is a journalist with The Guardian,
533
00:23:29,080 --> 00:23:33,080
uh, she's also got a new book out.
It's called The '80s Dinosaur:
534
00:23:33,400 --> 00:23:37,160
The Backward Attitudeof the Baby Boomer Generation.
535
00:23:37,240 --> 00:23:38,840
-Welcome to the show.
-Thank you.
536
00:23:38,920 --> 00:23:42,560
Did you know about this book?
We're in massive shit.
537
00:23:43,120 --> 00:23:44,240
We're in massive shit.
538
00:23:44,320 --> 00:23:46,760
...what you make of them,
and also tell David Hasselhoff.
539
00:23:46,840 --> 00:23:49,680
Well, it's pretty pathetic,
really, isn't it?
540
00:23:49,760 --> 00:23:52,920
I mean, you're the sort of throwback
who thinks that a woman's freedom
541
00:23:53,000 --> 00:23:56,240
means freedom to take her knickers off
and dance around a pole.
542
00:23:56,320 --> 00:23:58,200
That's actually not what I think at all,
543
00:23:58,280 --> 00:24:01,880
but if she wants to take off
her pants and dance around a pole,
544
00:24:01,960 --> 00:24:03,120
I'm not going to stop her.
545
00:24:03,200 --> 00:24:05,920
He's sort of ended up talking about women
taking their clothes off,
546
00:24:06,000 --> 00:24:08,800
which is sort of the opposite
of what we wanted him to talk about.
547
00:24:08,880 --> 00:24:11,280
[Lucinda] So, do you believe
in feminism, David?
548
00:24:11,960 --> 00:24:15,720
Yes, I absolutely believe
in the concept of feminism.
549
00:24:15,800 --> 00:24:18,800
No, feminism isn't a concept, David.
550
00:24:18,880 --> 00:24:21,000
-Isn't it? I thought it was.
-No.
551
00:24:21,080 --> 00:24:24,520
Women are being attacked,
demeaned, objectified,
552
00:24:24,600 --> 00:24:27,080
and not just behind closed doors, David.
553
00:24:27,160 --> 00:24:29,840
Uh, I've had a lot of fun
with women behind closed doors,
554
00:24:29,920 --> 00:24:32,240
but I have never objectified
a woman in public.
555
00:24:32,320 --> 00:24:34,400
I mean, what exactly does objectify mean?
556
00:24:34,480 --> 00:24:35,760
-[man] Let's just...
-Hasselhoff,
557
00:24:35,840 --> 00:24:38,000
do you understand that there are women
558
00:24:38,080 --> 00:24:40,440
being attacked in shopping centres?
559
00:24:40,520 --> 00:24:43,760
I have never attacked a woman
in a shopping centre.
560
00:24:43,840 --> 00:24:46,520
[man] No, let's get back
to some of the actual comments you made.
561
00:24:46,600 --> 00:24:50,400
Cos you're reported to have
said, "Women like getting hurt."
562
00:24:50,480 --> 00:24:52,440
No, no, no! Those words
were taken out of context.
563
00:24:52,520 --> 00:24:57,560
Some do. Some do. I've... Clubs.
I've been to... I've seen videos.
564
00:24:57,640 --> 00:25:01,280
They were misconstrued.
I was just having a harmless talk
565
00:25:01,360 --> 00:25:03,440
about relationships with my son.
566
00:25:03,520 --> 00:25:06,640
Oh, yeah, sorry, is this
the son, the illegitimate son,
567
00:25:06,720 --> 00:25:08,720
that's just recently come back
into your life, David?
568
00:25:09,440 --> 00:25:12,200
How many other illegitimate
children are there out there, David?
569
00:25:12,280 --> 00:25:15,040
And how many of their mothers
were playing hard to get?
570
00:25:15,400 --> 00:25:18,200
How many of the mothers
of those kids weren't quite sure
571
00:25:18,280 --> 00:25:20,480
of their own feelings,
but you knew, didn't you?
572
00:25:20,640 --> 00:25:23,760
Well, to be honest, they all consented.
573
00:25:23,840 --> 00:25:27,640
I mean, after all, I am David Hasselhoff.
574
00:25:28,000 --> 00:25:29,040
He's digging his own grave.
575
00:25:29,120 --> 00:25:30,920
Dad is not doing very well in the debate.
576
00:25:31,440 --> 00:25:34,640
To be fair, she is ripping him
a new arsehole right now.
577
00:25:35,160 --> 00:25:39,480
-What?
-Your dad's arse is a right-off.
578
00:25:39,560 --> 00:25:41,240
Why would she do that?
579
00:25:42,320 --> 00:25:45,920
Lesbians are weird, mate.
They're weird around anuses and that.
580
00:25:46,000 --> 00:25:49,240
I love, like, fake lesbians, like the ones
you see in the movies and that,
581
00:25:49,320 --> 00:25:51,720
but the real ones,
fucking hell, aggressive, innit?
582
00:25:51,800 --> 00:25:53,720
Here's a simple one for you.
Are you sexist?
583
00:25:56,280 --> 00:25:57,960
No, I am not a sexist.
584
00:25:58,040 --> 00:26:01,040
Perhaps I could ask
if we could have the audio played.
585
00:26:01,120 --> 00:26:03,160
[man] Let's hear the audio.
586
00:26:03,240 --> 00:26:05,880
"I do know one thing.Women like being hurt.
587
00:26:06,680 --> 00:26:08,240
[laughing]
588
00:26:08,320 --> 00:26:11,000
You know what else they want?They like us to be men,
589
00:26:12,240 --> 00:26:14,320
and they like us to take control.
590
00:26:14,400 --> 00:26:18,840
They just want to play hard to get,but they want to be gotten.
591
00:26:18,920 --> 00:26:23,200
I think us men knowwhat those women are thinking
592
00:26:24,240 --> 00:26:26,040
more than what they're thinking.
593
00:26:26,120 --> 00:26:30,120
Best part of my day was that blonde outthere. She was... [whistles]
594
00:26:30,200 --> 00:26:33,320
Sure would like to get herin the back seat of my KITT car.
595
00:26:33,400 --> 00:26:35,760
You know, I...
I know those words sound bad,
596
00:26:35,840 --> 00:26:38,520
but, God, that woman really was hot.
She's a hot chick.
597
00:26:38,920 --> 00:26:41,160
But they were your words, though,
weren't they?
598
00:26:41,240 --> 00:26:44,040
[stammering]
They were misconstrued. They were...
599
00:26:44,360 --> 00:26:46,480
Were they your words? Yes or no.
600
00:26:47,960 --> 00:26:50,400
That's all we've got time for.
I'm afraid we gotta leave it there.
601
00:26:50,480 --> 00:26:51,720
Uh, thank you for listening as well.
602
00:26:51,800 --> 00:26:54,120
You're listening to Talk London FM.
603
00:26:54,200 --> 00:26:56,000
Next up, we've got gardening
tips with Pat Sharp.
604
00:26:57,640 --> 00:26:58,640
[exhales]
605
00:27:00,480 --> 00:27:02,600
This is what happens
when girl power gets out of control.
606
00:27:02,680 --> 00:27:04,280
I blame the Spice Girls,
you know what I mean?
607
00:27:04,360 --> 00:27:06,000
They started it.
They didn't know what they started.
608
00:27:06,080 --> 00:27:07,320
It was all fluffy back then.
609
00:27:07,400 --> 00:27:09,880
Now you've got women
chopping off geezers' dicks
610
00:27:09,960 --> 00:27:11,520
and all this and that,
you know what I mean?
611
00:27:11,600 --> 00:27:15,000
He said that he want to get
the woman in the back of his KITT car.
612
00:27:15,080 --> 00:27:16,280
Like, what's wrong with that?
613
00:27:16,360 --> 00:27:19,400
He would drop her off
wherever she want, probably.
614
00:27:21,480 --> 00:27:26,120
Hey, David. I just got an email
from the client and they are...
615
00:27:26,200 --> 00:27:27,760
They're pretty sure
that that could not have gone worse,
616
00:27:27,840 --> 00:27:30,560
so they've decided to terminate
your contract with immediate effect.
617
00:27:30,640 --> 00:27:32,520
Whoa, whoa, whoa! Terminate?
What are you talking about?
618
00:27:32,600 --> 00:27:34,520
I did nothing wrong. Max, talk to him.
619
00:27:34,600 --> 00:27:35,600
No, no, I'm sorry all right.
This whole thing
620
00:27:35,680 --> 00:27:38,240
has just been an exercise
in incredible embarrassment. Dreadful.
621
00:27:38,320 --> 00:27:41,760
All right, that's it.
I'm done. I'm out of here.
622
00:27:41,840 --> 00:27:44,320
-I'm going back to LA.
-No, no, David, no, no!
623
00:27:44,400 --> 00:27:46,400
I've got loads of things up my sleeve.
624
00:27:46,480 --> 00:27:49,960
Relationship advice column
in a men's magazine.
625
00:27:50,200 --> 00:27:51,920
You'd be like an agony uncle.
626
00:27:53,040 --> 00:27:54,160
I'm done.
627
00:27:55,160 --> 00:27:56,920
Well, David.
Michael Knight would not have done that.
628
00:27:57,000 --> 00:28:00,040
He'd have stood up to them
and said something.
629
00:28:00,120 --> 00:28:02,040
Have you got anything to say?
630
00:28:02,120 --> 00:28:05,280
How do you get into advertising?
631
00:28:05,960 --> 00:28:08,080
Are you looking for people at your place?
632
00:28:08,160 --> 00:28:10,600
You know what?
I think you've had a stroke.
633
00:28:12,920 --> 00:28:15,120
Danny and I came up with a great idea.
634
00:28:15,200 --> 00:28:16,520
I'm gonna be the UN ambassador.
635
00:28:17,320 --> 00:28:19,920
Okay. This is the Fisher Price UN!
636
00:28:20,000 --> 00:28:25,000
A very famous star came into work
with a breast enhancement.
637
00:28:25,520 --> 00:28:27,840
What is your obsession with facts?
638
00:28:28,280 --> 00:28:29,560
I shat myself.
639
00:28:29,680 --> 00:28:31,280
Hey, Andy Murray, piss off!
640
00:28:31,360 --> 00:28:32,440
Ladies?
641
00:28:34,000 --> 00:28:35,120
Pfft, whatever.
642
00:28:35,680 --> 00:28:37,200
Quiet!
643
00:28:37,280 --> 00:28:38,320
What a rude kid.
644
00:28:38,400 --> 00:28:40,680
Sounds like
a declaration of war, Mr Hasselhoff.
645
00:28:41,760 --> 00:28:43,480
Everything he says is moronic.
646
00:28:43,560 --> 00:28:45,760
And you know what happened to his nuts?
647
00:28:45,840 --> 00:28:49,720
Well, it's likely
they may have been covered in chocolate.
648
00:28:49,800 --> 00:28:51,240
I thought he was mad.
649
00:28:51,360 --> 00:28:54,760
That is quite the most offensive thing
to have ever happened in this school.
650
00:28:55,080 --> 00:28:57,360
Listen, you don't need
to be thinking about
651
00:28:57,440 --> 00:28:58,720
girls shitting right now.
652
00:28:58,770 --> 00:29:03,320
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