Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:07,222 --> 00:00:10,392
[birds chirping]
2
00:00:11,143 --> 00:00:12,686
[radio DJ]
It's six a.m. in the Quint Cities,
3
00:00:12,770 --> 00:00:14,688
and there's a hint of spring in the air.
4
00:00:14,772 --> 00:00:17,295
It's National Leg Brace
Day, so let's try and
5
00:00:17,296 --> 00:00:19,818
remember those who don't
have a spring in their step,
6
00:00:19,902 --> 00:00:21,945
just excruciating pain.
7
00:00:23,447 --> 00:00:24,948
Here's Vanity Fare.
8
00:00:25,032 --> 00:00:27,534
? When it's sunny in the morning ?
9
00:00:27,618 --> 00:00:30,371
? Over by the window, day is dawning ?
10
00:00:30,454 --> 00:00:34,375
? When I feel the air
I feel that life is very good to me ?
11
00:00:34,458 --> 00:00:35,793
? You know ?
12
00:00:35,876 --> 00:00:38,587
? There's a sun bird on my pillow ?
13
00:00:38,670 --> 00:00:41,090
? I can see the funny weeping willow ?
14
00:00:41,173 --> 00:00:45,469
? When I feel the air
I feel that life is very good to me ?
15
00:00:45,552 --> 00:00:46,887
? You know ?
16
00:00:46,970 --> 00:00:49,431
? In the sun, there's so much yellow ?
17
00:00:49,515 --> 00:00:52,184
? Something in the early morning meadow ?
18
00:00:52,267 --> 00:00:54,769
? Tells me that today you're on your way ?
19
00:00:54,770 --> 00:00:56,438
? And you'll be coming home ?
20
00:00:56,522 --> 00:00:58,816
? Home to me ?
21
00:01:00,984 --> 00:01:01,819
Good luck, Sue.
22
00:01:01,902 --> 00:01:03,570
We both know you don't mean that.
23
00:01:03,654 --> 00:01:04,905
You want me to fail.
24
00:01:04,988 --> 00:01:06,573
Wanted.
25
00:01:06,657 --> 00:01:09,660
But I don't care anymore.
I got an airline that needs me.
26
00:01:09,743 --> 00:01:11,995
Well, maybe the airline
can raise your kids,
27
00:01:12,079 --> 00:01:13,205
be your cheerleader,
28
00:01:13,288 --> 00:01:15,666
and still have sex with you
when you don't shower for weeks
29
00:01:15,749 --> 00:01:17,835
after getting fired on Christmas.
30
00:01:17,918 --> 00:01:21,213
Hey, maybe this year they'll surprise you
and fire you on Easter.
31
00:01:22,631 --> 00:01:24,633
Nice, Sue. Real nice.
32
00:01:25,467 --> 00:01:27,344
Frank, wait.
33
00:01:27,427 --> 00:01:29,263
Before we leave like this,
34
00:01:29,346 --> 00:01:32,015
is there anything you want to say to me?
35
00:01:32,099 --> 00:01:33,725
Anything at all?
36
00:01:37,062 --> 00:01:38,689
Breakfast sucked.
37
00:01:49,450 --> 00:01:52,619
Now that's cold-blooded.
38
00:01:55,831 --> 00:01:56,748
Ah!
39
00:01:56,832 --> 00:02:00,335
[Redbone's
"Come and Get Your Love" playing]
40
00:02:07,050 --> 00:02:10,095
? Come and get your love ?
41
00:02:12,514 --> 00:02:15,517
? Come and get your love ?
42
00:02:16,643 --> 00:02:18,061
? Come and get your love ?
43
00:02:21,023 --> 00:02:23,400
? Come and get your love ?
44
00:02:24,776 --> 00:02:26,778
? Come and get your love
Come and get your love ?
45
00:02:26,862 --> 00:02:28,363
? Come and get your love now ?
46
00:02:29,740 --> 00:02:31,492
? Come and get your love
Come and get your love ?
47
00:02:31,575 --> 00:02:32,784
? Come and get your love now ?
48
00:02:32,868 --> 00:02:33,911
[grunts] Ah!
49
00:02:33,994 --> 00:02:35,621
? Come and get your love
Come and get your love ?
50
00:02:35,704 --> 00:02:37,498
? Come and get your love now ?
51
00:02:38,707 --> 00:02:40,250
? Come and get your love
Come and get your love ?
52
00:02:40,334 --> 00:02:42,294
? Come and get your love now ?
53
00:02:42,377 --> 00:02:44,932
sync & correction by f1nc0
~ Addic7ed.com ~
54
00:02:46,507 --> 00:02:49,635
Come on.
Where are you guys?
55
00:02:55,265 --> 00:03:01,063
Gentlemen, make no mistake,
we are about to commit a serious crime.
56
00:03:01,146 --> 00:03:03,857
And to quote Benjamin Franklin,
57
00:03:03,941 --> 00:03:06,944
"We must indeed all hang together
58
00:03:07,027 --> 00:03:11,615
or, most assuredly,
we shall all hang separately."
59
00:03:11,698 --> 00:03:14,779
- Thanks, Bob.
- Having said that,
60
00:03:14,814 --> 00:03:17,162
my brother-in-law
Stan is an Alderman,
61
00:03:17,246 --> 00:03:18,622
and if this thing goes south,
62
00:03:18,705 --> 00:03:21,959
I'll have the ability to make a deal
faster than all of you.
63
00:03:22,042 --> 00:03:25,796
- Not if I gut you like a deer first.
- Okay. Okay.
64
00:03:25,879 --> 00:03:28,590
Let's go over the plan
to get rid of Scoop one more time.
65
00:03:28,674 --> 00:03:30,842
It's now exactly 11:13.
66
00:03:30,926 --> 00:03:34,513
The flight for Duluth leaves at 3:57.
67
00:03:34,596 --> 00:03:39,017
I'll be there at the airport doing
my snack run no later than 3:10.
68
00:03:39,101 --> 00:03:40,686
[Rosie] We'll take care of Scoop.
69
00:03:40,769 --> 00:03:45,023
[man] Our union contact will meet you
with the means to neutralize him.
70
00:03:45,107 --> 00:03:49,069
[Rosie] Once he gets the stuff to me,
I'll put it in the proper hands.
71
00:03:49,152 --> 00:03:54,157
[man 2] We'll mix a little cocktail
for Scoop and make the hand off.
72
00:03:56,326 --> 00:03:59,371
[Pogo]
And I've got the hardest job of all.
73
00:03:59,454 --> 00:04:03,458
[grunting]
74
00:04:05,877 --> 00:04:07,889
Steady.
[thud]
75
00:04:08,630 --> 00:04:11,091
[hums]
76
00:04:11,967 --> 00:04:14,052
[grunts]
77
00:04:14,136 --> 00:04:15,762
Here's the coffee you wanted.
78
00:04:15,846 --> 00:04:17,931
I didn't ask for no bean juice.
79
00:04:18,015 --> 00:04:19,391
Now, give me my bean juice!
80
00:04:26,231 --> 00:04:29,234
? Plastic bowl
A-put a lid on it ?
81
00:04:29,318 --> 00:04:32,154
? Mouthy gal
A-put a lid on it ?
82
00:04:32,237 --> 00:04:37,492
? Button your lip
Or I'll button it for you ?
83
00:04:37,576 --> 00:04:40,704
? I'll hit you
Where your blouse covers it up! ?
84
00:04:40,787 --> 00:04:42,080
Pow!
85
00:04:42,164 --> 00:04:45,667
The king of romance,
Mr. Tommy Tahoe! [cheering]
86
00:04:45,751 --> 00:04:47,085
- [man] You're great, Tommy!
- Tommy!
87
00:04:47,169 --> 00:04:50,464
And now for the most exciting part
of our presentation:
88
00:04:50,547 --> 00:04:53,800
the new invention that's gonna
put this company back in the black!
89
00:04:53,884 --> 00:04:56,553
- [man] Blacks? No!
- [man 2] Hide the women!
90
00:04:56,637 --> 00:05:00,766
- I mean, restore us to profitability.
- Oh, yeah.
91
00:05:00,849 --> 00:05:05,103
Plast-A-Ware's flagship product
for 1974 is...
92
00:05:05,187 --> 00:05:06,772
The Rainbow Mug!
93
00:05:06,855 --> 00:05:10,984
Made of a patented blend of
38 different space-age chemicals
94
00:05:11,068 --> 00:05:13,987
that make it the only mug
that changes color
95
00:05:14,071 --> 00:05:16,615
to match whatever beverage
you're drinking!
96
00:05:16,698 --> 00:05:19,576
Ooh!
97
00:05:19,660 --> 00:05:21,620
[man] You mean like clear glass?
98
00:05:21,703 --> 00:05:23,038
[crowd groans]
99
00:05:23,830 --> 00:05:25,374
Uh...
100
00:05:25,457 --> 00:05:27,815
- Shit!
- Ooh.
101
00:05:27,850 --> 00:05:30,962
Well, thank God we didn't put
that stupid mug into production.
102
00:05:31,046 --> 00:05:34,299
We're making a hundred
thousand of them! We're fucked!
103
00:05:34,383 --> 00:05:35,717
[laughing]
104
00:05:35,801 --> 00:05:39,846
- What are you two smiling about?
- Oh, you'll find out.
105
00:05:39,930 --> 00:05:42,432
Man, I hope it's lesbian stuff.
106
00:05:43,767 --> 00:05:45,685
Kevin Murphy, I know you're in there!
107
00:05:45,769 --> 00:05:48,313
Oh, shit. Oh, shit.
Shit, shit, shit.
108
00:05:48,397 --> 00:05:50,065
Kevin, I'm coming down.
109
00:05:50,148 --> 00:05:53,485
It was Thursday morning, I was excited!
Haircut Girl was real!
110
00:05:53,568 --> 00:05:55,195
Then I came in my pants, twice!
111
00:05:55,278 --> 00:05:57,864
I didn't have a shirt,
then her boobs were sticking out,
112
00:05:57,948 --> 00:05:59,658
and I don't know!
113
00:05:59,741 --> 00:06:01,159
[sobs]
114
00:06:01,243 --> 00:06:04,586
Hey, hey, hey, little man.
Take it easy.
115
00:06:04,846 --> 00:06:07,082
- It's not your fault.
- It's not?
116
00:06:09,084 --> 00:06:11,753
You know, when I was your age,
117
00:06:11,837 --> 00:06:14,214
my mom had this friend, Mrs. Anderson.
118
00:06:14,297 --> 00:06:16,341
She was hotter than a car seat in August.
119
00:06:16,425 --> 00:06:20,554
She moved like a beautiful cat
that could walk on its back legs
120
00:06:20,637 --> 00:06:22,431
without somebody holding its paws.
121
00:06:24,224 --> 00:06:28,937
One night, she came over looking
for my mom, but my mom wasn't home.
122
00:06:29,563 --> 00:06:31,648
Well, one thing led to another,
123
00:06:31,731 --> 00:06:33,692
and I ended up getting my first hand job
124
00:06:33,775 --> 00:06:37,195
from a toll booth lady
on the Pennsylvania Turnpike.
125
00:06:38,738 --> 00:06:40,282
That doesn't make any sense.
126
00:06:40,365 --> 00:06:44,161
Once your dick gets hard,
the story never makes sense.
127
00:06:44,244 --> 00:06:46,538
I'm really sorry I ruined your party.
128
00:06:46,621 --> 00:06:49,124
That was gonna happen
one way or the other.
129
00:06:49,207 --> 00:06:51,543
I've been a blind man
these past few months.
130
00:06:51,626 --> 00:06:55,130
- I'm worried I might lose my job.
- Oh, no.
131
00:06:55,213 --> 00:06:58,383
It gets worse.
Turns out Cutie Pie was fucking everybody.
132
00:06:58,467 --> 00:07:01,219
Dudes, chicks, even Skeeball.
133
00:07:01,970 --> 00:07:05,765
Well, he didn't really fuck her,
she just kind of peed on him.
134
00:07:05,849 --> 00:07:08,560
You might want to get a penicillin shot.
135
00:07:10,687 --> 00:07:13,815
I guess the universe was trying
to send me a signal.
136
00:07:13,899 --> 00:07:15,567
Message received.
137
00:07:15,650 --> 00:07:18,820
Just got to put my life back together.
138
00:07:18,904 --> 00:07:20,614
First step is giving up drugs.
139
00:07:20,697 --> 00:07:23,116
That's right. I'm going 100% clean.
140
00:07:23,200 --> 00:07:25,076
Nothing.
141
00:07:25,160 --> 00:07:26,870
Just whiskey and weed.
142
00:07:26,953 --> 00:07:29,414
Well, I might blow a few stripes
on Flag Day.
143
00:07:29,498 --> 00:07:31,082
Sure, you deserve it.
144
00:07:31,166 --> 00:07:34,628
Thanks, man. Well... [yawns]
145
00:07:34,711 --> 00:07:38,548
Kev, I don't mean to be rude,
but it's time for old Vic to hit the sack.
146
00:07:38,632 --> 00:07:40,592
I haven't slept for nine days.
147
00:07:40,675 --> 00:07:43,011
Okay, let me get the door.
148
00:07:43,094 --> 00:07:45,180
[snoring]
149
00:07:51,853 --> 00:07:54,105
I love you, Mrs. Anderson.
150
00:07:54,189 --> 00:07:56,983
[Frank] Thanks for letting me
take the truck one last time, Smokey.
151
00:07:57,067 --> 00:08:00,070
- You're a lifesaver.
- Anything for you, Frank.
152
00:08:00,153 --> 00:08:02,346
You're like the son I never kept.
153
00:08:02,697 --> 00:08:05,366
I appreciate you helping me out,
even though if this thing works,
154
00:08:05,367 --> 00:08:08,036
it means I won't be able
to drive for you anymore.
155
00:08:08,119 --> 00:08:11,164
It's okay.
You're doing the right thing.
156
00:08:11,248 --> 00:08:14,501
You gotta take care of
that beautiful wife of yours.
157
00:08:14,584 --> 00:08:16,503
Nah, this isn't about that.
158
00:08:16,586 --> 00:08:18,171
I got to get my job back.
159
00:08:18,255 --> 00:08:21,758
Frank, you still got to look after those
who look after you.
160
00:08:21,842 --> 00:08:23,552
It's not as easy as it sounds.
161
00:08:23,635 --> 00:08:25,262
Easier than losing her.
162
00:08:25,345 --> 00:08:27,347
I know what I'm talking about.
163
00:08:27,430 --> 00:08:31,476
I ignored my Mavis
while I was building this empire.
164
00:08:31,560 --> 00:08:32,853
She gave me everything
165
00:08:32,936 --> 00:08:36,982
and all she asked in return was
to one day take a vacation together.
166
00:08:37,065 --> 00:08:38,275
See the world.
167
00:08:38,358 --> 00:08:42,237
And I kept saying,
"Yeah, sure. Someday, someday."
168
00:08:43,154 --> 00:08:45,282
But that day never came.
169
00:08:45,365 --> 00:08:50,412
And now she fucks the mailman just because
he shows her postcards from overseas.
170
00:08:50,495 --> 00:08:53,081
Don't pull a Smokey, Frank.
171
00:08:53,164 --> 00:08:55,959
Thanks, Smokey,
but I think I know what I'm doing.
172
00:08:56,042 --> 00:08:57,836
I better go.
173
00:08:57,919 --> 00:08:59,296
I'll never forget you.
174
00:08:59,379 --> 00:09:00,630
Yes, you will....
175
00:09:01,339 --> 00:09:02,507
but I appreciate it.
176
00:09:08,597 --> 00:09:11,349
Don't fuck this up, Frank Murphy.
177
00:09:14,436 --> 00:09:15,854
Smokey, your wife on the phone!
178
00:09:15,937 --> 00:09:19,608
Tell that ho to have the mailman
fetch her Rice-A-Roni!
179
00:09:21,401 --> 00:09:25,530
? So pay me in cash ?
180
00:09:25,614 --> 00:09:29,367
? The IRS thinks I am dead ?
Pow!
181
00:09:29,451 --> 00:09:31,411
- [cheering and applause]
- Thank you!
182
00:09:32,203 --> 00:09:34,164
It's a private bank, folks.
183
00:09:34,247 --> 00:09:36,082
Nothing federal about it.
184
00:09:36,875 --> 00:09:38,960
Well, Sue, this is it.
185
00:09:39,044 --> 00:09:41,671
Time for the world to see your genius.
186
00:09:41,755 --> 00:09:46,259
Now you can go home tonight and
rub your success right in Frank's face.
187
00:09:46,343 --> 00:09:49,346
This isn't about him. This is for me.
188
00:09:49,429 --> 00:09:51,640
There's that killer instinct.
189
00:09:51,723 --> 00:09:55,310
Well, let's close out the meeting
with our time-honored tradition,
190
00:09:55,393 --> 00:10:00,023
a brief contractually obligated appearance
by the founder of Plast-A-Ware,
191
00:10:00,106 --> 00:10:02,275
Mrs. Henrietta Van Horne!
192
00:10:02,359 --> 00:10:04,110
[cheering and applause]
193
00:10:04,194 --> 00:10:06,112
Okay, very good.
Thank you, Henrietta.
194
00:10:06,196 --> 00:10:07,697
See you next year, God willing.
195
00:10:07,781 --> 00:10:09,866
Tracy and Tommy, if you don't mind,
[feedback]
196
00:10:09,950 --> 00:10:13,203
I'd like to present
a new product I'm fond of.
197
00:10:13,286 --> 00:10:15,163
[chuckles]
This wasn't on the agenda.
198
00:10:15,246 --> 00:10:17,165
Well, I know it's hard to follow
199
00:10:17,248 --> 00:10:20,418
an invention as brilliant
as The Rainbow Mug.
200
00:10:20,502 --> 00:10:21,503
[laughter]
201
00:10:21,586 --> 00:10:23,192
[man] That thing sucked!
202
00:10:23,227 --> 00:10:28,301
Allow me to introduce a little thing
called the Salad Tosser.
203
00:10:28,385 --> 00:10:29,427
[crowd] Oh!
204
00:10:29,511 --> 00:10:34,557
A revolutionary new device
that spin-dries wet lettuce.
205
00:10:34,641 --> 00:10:35,600
[crowd] Oh!
206
00:10:35,684 --> 00:10:36,726
[applause]
207
00:10:36,810 --> 00:10:38,645
Well, well, well.
208
00:10:38,728 --> 00:10:41,564
You don't like a man giving
you the straight dope on your
209
00:10:41,565 --> 00:10:44,401
little thingamajig, so you
kick it to the clam upstairs.
210
00:10:44,484 --> 00:10:45,902
Yep.
211
00:10:45,986 --> 00:10:48,947
And to think
I complimented you on your rack.
212
00:10:50,365 --> 00:10:53,660
[grunting]
213
00:10:53,743 --> 00:10:58,415
I am Ant-ius
and I am a fickle god!
214
00:10:58,498 --> 00:10:59,958
Sucker!
215
00:11:00,041 --> 00:11:01,167
Hey, Jimmy.
216
00:11:01,251 --> 00:11:05,130
Well, if it isn't Bill,
the compassionate pussy.
217
00:11:05,213 --> 00:11:08,633
Have you come to...
[mockingly] save somebody's life?
218
00:11:08,717 --> 00:11:11,928
Look, Jimmy, I'm sorry
for the whole hockey stick thing.
219
00:11:12,012 --> 00:11:14,597
And if you want to beat me up, go ahead.
220
00:11:16,486 --> 00:11:20,258
[dramatic music]
221
00:11:21,730 --> 00:11:22,605
Ah!
222
00:11:23,898 --> 00:11:25,150
[laughs]
223
00:11:25,233 --> 00:11:27,652
Made you flinch, you freckled fairy!
224
00:11:27,736 --> 00:11:29,320
[laughs nervously]
That's a good one, Jimmy.
225
00:11:29,404 --> 00:11:32,031
Thanks.
I thought of it in the hospital.
226
00:11:33,032 --> 00:11:36,786
You know, you didn't have to take me
to the emergency room like that,
227
00:11:36,870 --> 00:11:37,871
but you did.
228
00:11:39,080 --> 00:11:41,166
You would've done the same
if it was me.
229
00:11:41,249 --> 00:11:43,501
No.
I'd let you die in the street.
230
00:11:43,585 --> 00:11:46,713
And then I'd move your body so it looked
like you were blowing yourself.
231
00:11:46,796 --> 00:11:50,592
And then I'd sell tickets to anybody who
wanted to see a dead kid blowing himself.
232
00:11:51,217 --> 00:11:54,929
You and me are okay now, Murphy.
Just don't piss me off again.
233
00:11:55,013 --> 00:11:57,932
Or some weirdo's gonna be
jerking off to your corpse.
234
00:11:58,016 --> 00:11:59,976
I won't, I swear.
235
00:12:00,059 --> 00:12:02,103
Thanks, Jimmy.
I'll see you around.
236
00:12:03,021 --> 00:12:03,855
Who's that?
237
00:12:03,938 --> 00:12:06,399
That's the dickweed
who took me to the doctor.
238
00:12:07,763 --> 00:12:11,153
[music]
239
00:12:11,154 --> 00:12:15,533
- Thanks for saving my brother.
- [stutters] You're welcome.
240
00:12:19,037 --> 00:12:21,247
- What are you smiling at?!
- Nothing!
241
00:12:21,331 --> 00:12:23,416
Get away from the window, Bridget!
242
00:12:23,500 --> 00:12:26,986
Blow it out your ass,
you fucking splooge socket!
243
00:12:29,702 --> 00:12:31,591
[grunts, thud, groans]
244
00:12:31,674 --> 00:12:36,888
Your lettuce doesn't have
to "romaine" soggy anymore.
245
00:12:36,971 --> 00:12:41,142
[chuckles] You can "leaf" the drying
to the Salad Tosser.
246
00:12:41,226 --> 00:12:43,937
[cheering and applause]
247
00:12:44,020 --> 00:12:46,147
- [woman] I love you!
- We did it!
248
00:12:46,231 --> 00:12:47,232
You did it!
249
00:12:47,315 --> 00:12:51,361
[crowd chanting] Henrietta!
Henrietta!
250
00:12:51,444 --> 00:12:55,824
Oh, thank you.
Thank you so much.
251
00:12:55,907 --> 00:13:00,328
Tell us, Henrietta, how did you come up
with this brilliant invention of yours?
252
00:13:00,411 --> 00:13:05,291
Well, it's an amazing story.
I can't take credit for it.
253
00:13:05,375 --> 00:13:08,211
Chin up, tits out, Sue.
It's your time to shine!
254
00:13:08,294 --> 00:13:12,298
God gave me the idea when my
washing machine broke down!
255
00:13:12,382 --> 00:13:13,758
[gasps]
256
00:13:13,842 --> 00:13:15,051
That resonates!
257
00:13:15,134 --> 00:13:19,514
You should have seen the first
prototype I built in my garage.
258
00:13:19,597 --> 00:13:23,351
- Oh, my God. She's stealing it.
- Not necessarily.
259
00:13:23,434 --> 00:13:26,104
My husband, Frank,
wanted to put it through a wall!
260
00:13:26,187 --> 00:13:28,606
Oh, yeah. She's stealing it.
261
00:13:28,690 --> 00:13:31,109
[woman] The Salad Tosser,
I always liked it!
262
00:13:31,192 --> 00:13:32,610
That's it for this year, folks!
263
00:13:32,694 --> 00:13:36,155
Put your party pantsuits on, girls!
We did it!
264
00:13:36,239 --> 00:13:38,408
- How could you?
- How could I what?
265
00:13:38,491 --> 00:13:41,578
You took credit for my idea.
266
00:13:41,661 --> 00:13:45,748
Oh, dear sweet Sue.
Let me ask you something.
267
00:13:45,832 --> 00:13:48,501
Who was Christopher Columbus' navigator?
268
00:13:48,585 --> 00:13:52,422
Can you name one fucking fiddle player
in Beethoven's band?
269
00:13:52,505 --> 00:13:55,967
You know how many Irishmen
and test monkeys died at Kitty Hawk
270
00:13:56,050 --> 00:14:00,054
before those two derby-wearing dickheads
had the balls to get on that thing?
271
00:14:00,138 --> 00:14:02,515
Every moment in history needs a name.
272
00:14:02,599 --> 00:14:05,059
And I'm that name.
273
00:14:05,143 --> 00:14:07,395
So, wipe that kicked,
puppy dog look off your face.
274
00:14:07,478 --> 00:14:10,106
The Salad Tosser is mine now.
275
00:14:10,189 --> 00:14:13,192
- You won't get away with this.
- We will take you to court.
276
00:14:13,276 --> 00:14:14,986
Of course you won't.
277
00:14:15,069 --> 00:14:18,114
You invented it while you
were working for Plast-A-Ware,
278
00:14:18,197 --> 00:14:21,576
so Plast-A-Ware owns the idea.
279
00:14:21,659 --> 00:14:27,081
And I am Plast-A-Ware.
Here, celebrate our success.
280
00:14:27,165 --> 00:14:29,897
But not too much. I need
you to come in tomorrow
281
00:14:29,898 --> 00:14:32,629
with five new ideas and
we'll see what sticks.
282
00:14:32,712 --> 00:14:35,006
[cheering and applause]
[Henrietta laughs]
283
00:14:35,089 --> 00:14:36,699
Oh, my God.
284
00:14:41,221 --> 00:14:44,682
- [man] Come on, hurry up.
- Have fun in Duluth, Scoop.
285
00:14:44,766 --> 00:14:47,518
Don't forget your Me-Paper,
you racist fuck.
286
00:14:51,439 --> 00:14:55,109
Now all we have to do
is wait for Dunbarton to realize
287
00:14:55,193 --> 00:14:58,696
he's got no one to run baggage
on the busiest day of the month.
288
00:14:58,780 --> 00:15:00,448
Except for Frank Murphy,
289
00:15:00,531 --> 00:15:03,868
who will just happen to be here,
filling the rubber machine.
290
00:15:03,952 --> 00:15:06,663
And we'll tell Dunbarton
you're the only man
291
00:15:06,746 --> 00:15:08,665
who can pull this airline
out of the shitter.
292
00:15:08,748 --> 00:15:11,542
And I will back you up all the way.
293
00:15:11,626 --> 00:15:15,213
Thanks, Bob.
I know you're taking a big risk for me.
294
00:15:15,296 --> 00:15:17,674
It's way overdue, Frank.
295
00:15:17,757 --> 00:15:22,804
I should've stuck up for you when that
miserable prick fired you on Christmas,
296
00:15:22,887 --> 00:15:25,223
because that's what friends do.
297
00:15:26,140 --> 00:15:29,769
They stick by each other,
through thick and thin.
298
00:15:30,853 --> 00:15:32,146
No matter what.
299
00:15:33,773 --> 00:15:35,400
There's our hero.
300
00:15:36,609 --> 00:15:37,694
[blows kiss]
301
00:15:38,444 --> 00:15:39,404
Love you, Frank.
302
00:15:39,487 --> 00:15:41,281
Packed you a lunch, working man.
303
00:15:41,364 --> 00:15:42,949
Honey, I'm proud of you!
304
00:15:43,032 --> 00:15:46,703
We're a team, Frank.
And I need you now more than ever.
305
00:15:46,786 --> 00:15:49,414
You're the only person I can turn to and...
306
00:15:49,497 --> 00:15:51,249
[snoring]
307
00:15:51,332 --> 00:15:52,625
When have I ever disappointed you?
308
00:15:52,709 --> 00:15:54,711
Just a quick loan, honey.
309
00:15:54,794 --> 00:15:57,588
You can do whatever your heart desires
as long as you're home by 3:00.
310
00:15:57,672 --> 00:15:59,173
I'm getting a hernia supporting you.
311
00:15:59,257 --> 00:16:01,134
The old... [nagging sound]
312
00:16:01,217 --> 00:16:03,177
Blah, blah, blah!
313
00:16:03,261 --> 00:16:05,179
Frank, wait.
314
00:16:05,263 --> 00:16:09,934
Before we leave like this, is there
anything you want to say to me?
315
00:16:10,018 --> 00:16:11,894
Anything at all?
316
00:16:11,978 --> 00:16:15,919
[Pogo] That's the kind of friend I want
to be from now on, Frank.
317
00:16:16,019 --> 00:16:20,919
- What do you say?
- You miserable fucking asshole.
318
00:16:21,738 --> 00:16:23,031
Thanks a lot, fucker!
319
00:16:23,114 --> 00:16:27,368
- I pour my heart out to you and this is...
- No, Bob, not you! Me!
320
00:16:27,452 --> 00:16:29,787
Guys, I'm sorry.
I got to go see Sue.
321
00:16:29,871 --> 00:16:31,331
I can't do this thing with you.
322
00:16:31,414 --> 00:16:34,709
Can't do this?
You just did do this!
323
00:16:34,792 --> 00:16:36,565
Motherfucker, we just
drugged a vegetable
324
00:16:36,566 --> 00:16:38,338
and stuffed him in
the bottom of a plane!
325
00:16:38,421 --> 00:16:39,589
I know, and I'm sorry.
326
00:16:39,672 --> 00:16:43,092
We can't make this go away!
It's a Class-A felony.
327
00:16:43,176 --> 00:16:45,845
- Not in Texas.
- Hey! What y'all doing here?
328
00:16:45,928 --> 00:16:48,139
- Airport stuff.
- Nothing. Nothing.
329
00:16:48,222 --> 00:16:49,807
We were just leaving.
It's okay.
330
00:16:49,891 --> 00:16:53,770
No, it's not okay.
You're messing with our hijacking!
331
00:16:53,771 --> 00:16:56,343
[action music]
[gunshots]
332
00:16:56,378 --> 00:16:59,150
[hijacker] Everybody put
your motherfucking hands up!
333
00:16:59,233 --> 00:17:01,444
No, no. No, no, no, no!
You can't do this today!
334
00:17:01,527 --> 00:17:03,321
They're not supposed to do it
any day.
335
00:17:03,404 --> 00:17:07,861
If anyone asks, a Puerto Rican
put Scoop on that plane.
336
00:17:09,827 --> 00:17:12,330
[slurring] How did we not see that coming?
337
00:17:12,413 --> 00:17:14,040
We were so blind!
338
00:17:16,167 --> 00:17:17,335
Fucking lettuce!
339
00:17:17,418 --> 00:17:18,711
[grunts]
340
00:17:18,795 --> 00:17:20,463
Get out of the street, lady!
341
00:17:20,546 --> 00:17:23,549
You get out of the street, lady!
342
00:17:26,719 --> 00:17:30,264
That's it, Sue.
Get all those feelings out now.
343
00:17:30,348 --> 00:17:34,477
That way it'll be easier for you
to go back to work tomorrow.
344
00:17:34,560 --> 00:17:36,270
I can't go back there.
345
00:17:36,354 --> 00:17:38,314
That would be humiliating.
346
00:17:38,398 --> 00:17:41,442
Day after day,
knowing what they did to me,
347
00:17:41,526 --> 00:17:44,320
everybody looking at me
like I have a fatal disease.
348
00:17:44,404 --> 00:17:46,072
"Oh, poor Sue.
349
00:17:46,155 --> 00:17:48,574
They stole your idea.
350
00:17:48,658 --> 00:17:53,162
Now go get us some fucking ham sandwiches,
hold the mustard."
351
00:17:54,997 --> 00:17:58,376
Well, would your husband dying
make things better?
352
00:17:58,459 --> 00:18:01,879
[reporter] The fifth hijacking this
week is taking place in our own backyard.
353
00:18:01,963 --> 00:18:03,631
The hijackers claim to be members
354
00:18:03,714 --> 00:18:08,469
of the Black Liberation Alliance
for Black Liberation or BLABLA.
355
00:18:08,553 --> 00:18:10,062
Oh my God!
356
00:18:11,556 --> 00:18:16,394
[over PA] This is the FBI! Release those
hostages and surrender now!
357
00:18:16,477 --> 00:18:20,398
Fuck you! No way!
We demand $10 million
358
00:18:20,481 --> 00:18:23,860
to help out my forgotten
brothers and sisters in Detroit!
359
00:18:23,943 --> 00:18:27,330
- And Oakland!
- Sorry, man. We got to cut bait on Oakland.
360
00:18:27,365 --> 00:18:30,700
[whimpers]
We do not negotiate with terrorists!
361
00:18:30,701 --> 00:18:33,801
[guns cock]
362
00:18:34,287 --> 00:18:38,374
[sighs] This is why I don't come
to your fucking house on Sunday.
363
00:18:38,458 --> 00:18:41,419
[phone ringing]
364
00:18:41,502 --> 00:18:43,243
Hello?
Hey, Mom.
365
00:18:43,278 --> 00:18:45,590
- How'd your thing go?
- Are we millionaires now?
366
00:18:45,673 --> 00:18:47,300
[slurring] Your father's in danger.
367
00:18:47,383 --> 00:18:52,221
I need you to find somebody to drive you
to the TV store and pick me up.
368
00:18:52,305 --> 00:18:54,932
- Are you okay?
- I'm fine, honey!
369
00:18:57,977 --> 00:19:00,938
My mom's drunk
and I need a ride to go get her!
370
00:19:01,022 --> 00:19:02,356
Take my horse, partner.
371
00:19:04,567 --> 00:19:07,195
- All four hundred of them.
- Seriously?
372
00:19:07,278 --> 00:19:09,655
I'd drive you myself,
but giving up a gram a day
373
00:19:09,656 --> 00:19:12,033
of cocaine habit isn't
as easy as it sounded
374
00:19:12,116 --> 00:19:14,243
when I was on cocaine.
375
00:19:14,327 --> 00:19:16,162
[moaning]
376
00:19:17,288 --> 00:19:21,375
We have a bomb in this suitcase,
and we will use it!
377
00:19:21,459 --> 00:19:23,586
I'm the CEO of the airline.
378
00:19:23,669 --> 00:19:25,922
Let me talk some sense to these people.
379
00:19:26,547 --> 00:19:29,967
What are you fucking
animals doing on my airplane?
380
00:19:30,051 --> 00:19:32,470
- Mr. Dunbarton, no!
- Murphy?!
381
00:19:32,553 --> 00:19:36,724
What the hell are you doing here,
you shamrock-shitting pen-hoarder?
382
00:19:36,807 --> 00:19:40,269
- Fucking up my life, sir!
- This is your last chance.
383
00:19:40,353 --> 00:19:43,731
You've got ten seconds to give up
or we're storming the plane.
384
00:19:43,814 --> 00:19:47,948
Then you've got seven seconds before
I blow this whole place the fuck up!
385
00:19:48,444 --> 00:19:50,279
Well, then we'll do it in five.
386
00:19:50,363 --> 00:19:52,323
This ain't Name That Tune, motherfucker!
387
00:19:52,406 --> 00:19:55,451
I'm gonna start shooting
hostages one at a time.
388
00:19:56,327 --> 00:19:59,038
Go ahead. Say your prayers.
389
00:20:00,840 --> 00:20:04,252
- Nah, I don't think so.
- Frank, what the fuck?
390
00:20:04,335 --> 00:20:07,838
Buddy, if you shot me now,
you'd be doing me a favor.
391
00:20:07,922 --> 00:20:10,883
- My wife hates me... for good reason.
- [crowd gasps]
392
00:20:10,967 --> 00:20:12,969
I haven't been there for her.
393
00:20:13,052 --> 00:20:16,180
The only right decision I ever made
was marrying that woman.
394
00:20:16,264 --> 00:20:18,516
And I spent the last two months
throwing it all away.
395
00:20:18,599 --> 00:20:22,061
- Oh, Frank...
- Who the fuck is this guy?
396
00:20:22,144 --> 00:20:25,398
This morning she gave me
one last chance to fix things.
397
00:20:25,481 --> 00:20:27,191
I should have said I was sorry,
398
00:20:27,275 --> 00:20:31,320
that I think she's a great woman,
a wonderful mother,
399
00:20:31,404 --> 00:20:34,703
and an absolute animal in the sack.
[vomits]
400
00:20:34,740 --> 00:20:36,826
But I blew it.
401
00:20:36,909 --> 00:20:39,870
I'll tell you what.
Let all these other people go.
402
00:20:39,954 --> 00:20:42,206
They've actually got
something to live for.
403
00:20:42,290 --> 00:20:45,793
As for me?
I deserve a bullet.
404
00:20:46,711 --> 00:20:49,255
So, go ahead.
Just shoot me.
405
00:20:56,012 --> 00:20:57,680
- Frank!
- Dad!
406
00:20:57,763 --> 00:20:59,765
Jesus Christ!
You fucking shot me!
407
00:20:59,849 --> 00:21:02,727
Anybody moves,
the next one is in his head!
408
00:21:02,810 --> 00:21:04,228
Somebody do something!
409
00:21:04,312 --> 00:21:05,771
[groans]
410
00:21:05,855 --> 00:21:09,546
Get ready to go in. Forty percent
survival rate is acceptable.
411
00:21:09,581 --> 00:21:13,112
Hey! How did this plane get
in my apartment?
412
00:21:13,195 --> 00:21:14,655
Wha...
[grunting]
413
00:21:14,739 --> 00:21:17,074
- That's my nephew!
- Sweet Jesus!
414
00:21:17,158 --> 00:21:19,243
Those butchers are already
maiming hostages!
415
00:21:19,327 --> 00:21:21,245
You dirty trickers!
416
00:21:21,329 --> 00:21:24,332
- Gave me a sleepy coffee!
- Ah, shit.
417
00:21:24,415 --> 00:21:26,167
Time to call my brother-in-law.
418
00:21:26,250 --> 00:21:29,211
No hair dryers on the tarmac!
419
00:21:29,295 --> 00:21:31,631
- [man] The bomb!
- Ah!
420
00:21:32,882 --> 00:21:35,384
[reporter] This is simply incredible.
421
00:21:35,468 --> 00:21:38,888
A courageous Mohican employee is
taking on the hijackers single-handedly.
422
00:21:38,971 --> 00:21:42,016
This is the most heroic thing
this reporter has ever seen
423
00:21:42,099 --> 00:21:45,978
since I reported on my own
reporting of the Vietnam War.
424
00:21:47,940 --> 00:21:49,618
[chittering]
425
00:21:51,150 --> 00:21:52,902
Huh?
426
00:21:54,362 --> 00:21:55,404
[cheering]
427
00:21:57,782 --> 00:21:59,784
Thank you, baseball fans!
428
00:22:02,161 --> 00:22:06,123
Re-segregate now!
It's what white god wants!
429
00:22:06,207 --> 00:22:07,667
[all groan]
430
00:22:07,750 --> 00:22:10,294
Let's get those people off that plane!
431
00:22:10,378 --> 00:22:13,172
- FBI!
- Keep your hands where I can see them!
432
00:22:13,255 --> 00:22:15,508
- [Roger] Murphy!
- Ah, shit.
433
00:22:16,384 --> 00:22:19,261
You accidental ejaculations
thought you could
434
00:22:19,262 --> 00:22:22,139
get rid of my nephew by
stashing him on a plane?
435
00:22:22,223 --> 00:22:25,309
He's a Dunbarton!
Your genetic superior!
436
00:22:25,393 --> 00:22:28,687
[chanting] Scoop!
Scoop! Scoop!
437
00:22:28,771 --> 00:22:32,149
I will see you rot in a
dungeon and your children
438
00:22:32,150 --> 00:22:35,528
will make my underwear
in a Cambodian sweatshop!
439
00:22:35,611 --> 00:22:39,198
And I will wear it once,
throw it out, and demand more!
440
00:22:39,281 --> 00:22:41,416
[singing]
[boom, splat]
441
00:22:45,079 --> 00:22:46,622
Holy shit.
442
00:22:46,705 --> 00:22:47,832
[gasps]
443
00:22:47,915 --> 00:22:49,525
Mr. Dunbarton...
444
00:22:51,043 --> 00:22:52,920
[gurgling]
445
00:22:54,630 --> 00:22:56,757
Fucking idiot!
446
00:22:58,634 --> 00:23:00,219
Holy shit.
447
00:23:01,303 --> 00:23:04,098
- Holy shit!
- Sweet Jesus! [screaming]
448
00:23:05,224 --> 00:23:09,228
I think Dunbarton would have wanted us
to take the rest of the day off.
449
00:23:09,311 --> 00:23:11,230
- Frank!
- Sue?
450
00:23:12,374 --> 00:23:15,278
[music]
451
00:23:15,313 --> 00:23:17,736
- Ah!
- Oh, my God! Are you okay?
452
00:23:17,820 --> 00:23:20,114
I'll be fine.
It went right through.
453
00:23:20,197 --> 00:23:21,449
And I did kind of ask for it.
454
00:23:21,532 --> 00:23:24,076
I know. I heard everything you said.
455
00:23:24,160 --> 00:23:27,371
Oh. Yeah, I don't think
I was making a whole lot of sense.
456
00:23:27,455 --> 00:23:30,833
I knew exactly what you meant.
And it was beautiful.
457
00:23:30,916 --> 00:23:32,084
- Daddy!
- Dad!
458
00:23:32,168 --> 00:23:34,420
Hey, guys!
I'm sorry you kids had to see that.
459
00:23:34,503 --> 00:23:36,881
Yeah, that was really fucked up.
460
00:23:36,964 --> 00:23:38,507
Yes, it was.
461
00:23:38,591 --> 00:23:40,468
And it's gonna hurt for a while.
462
00:23:40,551 --> 00:23:42,261
But here's how you deal with it:
463
00:23:42,344 --> 00:23:43,679
you just shove it down.
464
00:23:43,762 --> 00:23:46,223
Keep shoving till it goes away.
465
00:23:46,307 --> 00:23:49,393
It will try to come back up,
but just keep shoving it down.
466
00:23:49,477 --> 00:23:50,519
But his face was...
467
00:23:50,603 --> 00:23:52,229
I know, princess, just keep shoving.
468
00:23:52,313 --> 00:23:53,439
We'll take you for ice cream.
469
00:23:54,732 --> 00:23:57,067
- I love you.
- I love you too.
470
00:23:58,402 --> 00:24:00,362
- Gross!
- We're in love.
471
00:24:00,446 --> 00:24:02,490
No, Dad, you're covered in blood!
472
00:24:02,573 --> 00:24:04,700
Well, so were you when I first saw you.
473
00:24:11,707 --> 00:24:15,461
Honey, I'm so sorry
things went sour for you today.
474
00:24:15,544 --> 00:24:17,630
No. Shh. That's not important now.
475
00:24:17,713 --> 00:24:18,881
Yes, it is.
476
00:24:18,964 --> 00:24:20,925
That old broad didn't deserve you.
477
00:24:21,008 --> 00:24:23,177
Your next invention will be even better.
478
00:24:23,260 --> 00:24:27,556
Whatever you want to do,
I will support you one thousand percent.
479
00:24:27,640 --> 00:24:29,808
Thank you, sweetie.
480
00:24:30,768 --> 00:24:34,063
And you didn't have to go to the pawn shop
and buy this old thing back.
481
00:24:34,146 --> 00:24:36,273
I sure as hell did.
482
00:24:36,357 --> 00:24:38,025
And I'll never lose sight of it again.
483
00:24:38,108 --> 00:24:40,528
But it cost $250.
484
00:24:40,611 --> 00:24:43,322
It was worth every penny
of what I traded it for.
485
00:24:43,405 --> 00:24:46,992
- What the fuck?
- [Bill] What are we supposed to watch now?
486
00:24:47,076 --> 00:24:49,703
- [Frank] Watch each other!
- Such a dick!
487
00:24:49,787 --> 00:24:54,124
They'll be fine. Maybe Maureen
will teach Kevin to read.
488
00:24:54,208 --> 00:24:57,545
Frank, it feels like
we have a chance at a new start.
489
00:24:57,628 --> 00:25:00,756
The kids are getting older now and
they're not gonna need us as much anymore.
490
00:25:00,839 --> 00:25:02,800
You could go back to college.
491
00:25:02,883 --> 00:25:04,718
And you could take flight lessons.
492
00:25:04,802 --> 00:25:06,512
Maybe I will.
493
00:25:06,595 --> 00:25:08,514
Come here, beautiful.
494
00:25:11,809 --> 00:25:14,687
- Oh, Frank.
- Latex, my dear?
495
00:25:14,770 --> 00:25:17,189
[Sue] Ooh, I smell cherries.
496
00:25:17,910 --> 00:25:22,428
[music]
497
00:25:34,206 --> 00:25:36,375
One, two, three, baby!
498
00:25:36,458 --> 00:25:38,669
One, two, three, baby!
499
00:25:38,752 --> 00:25:40,504
Baby! Baby! Baby!
Baby! Baby!
500
00:25:40,588 --> 00:25:42,139
[Paul Anka's "Having My Baby" playing]
501
00:25:42,223 --> 00:25:45,009
[man] # And you're having my baby #
502
00:25:46,302 --> 00:25:51,098
[woman] # I'm a woman in love
And I love what it's doing to me #
503
00:25:52,266 --> 00:25:54,393
[man] # Having my baby! #
504
00:25:55,853 --> 00:26:01,108
[woman] # I'm a woman in love
And I love what is going through me #
505
00:26:01,191 --> 00:26:03,485
- # Yeah #
- [man] # Didn't have to keep it #
506
00:26:03,569 --> 00:26:07,489
- [woman] # Oh, no #
- [man] # Wouldn't put you through it #
507
00:26:08,574 --> 00:26:11,201
? You could've swept it
from your life ?
508
00:26:11,285 --> 00:26:14,038
? But you wouldn't do it ?
509
00:26:14,121 --> 00:26:17,207
- # Said you wouldn't do it #
- [woman] # No, no, no #
510
00:26:17,291 --> 00:26:20,202
[man] # And you're having my baby #
511
00:26:21,170 --> 00:26:26,967
[woman] # I'm a woman in love
And I love what it's doing to me #
512
00:26:27,051 --> 00:26:29,420
[both] # Having my baby #
513
00:26:30,846 --> 00:26:36,685
[woman] # I'm a woman in love
And I love what's going through me #
514
00:26:36,769 --> 00:26:39,772
- [man] # Having my baby #
- [chorus] # Having my baby #
515
00:26:39,855 --> 00:26:45,227
[man] # It's another way of saying
How much I love you... #
516
00:26:47,613 --> 00:26:49,990
[Frank and Sue] Fuck me.
517
00:26:53,074 --> 00:26:56,542
sync & correction by f1nc0
~ Addic7ed.com ~
518
00:26:56,592 --> 00:27:01,142
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
40774
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof