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KAZAKHSTAN MINISTRY OF
INFORMATION PRESENTS
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A KAZAKHSTAN
TELEVISION PRODUCTION
3
00:00:40,916 --> 00:00:43,084
IN ASSOCIATION WITH
BAGATOV FILMS
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My name Borat.
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l like you. I like sex.
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lt's nice.
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This my country of Kazakhstan.
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lt locate between Tajikistan
and Kyrgyzstan
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KAZAKHSTAN
TAJIKISTAN
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KAZAKHSTAN
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KAZAKHSTAN
KYRGYZSTAN
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and assholes Uzbekistan.
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KAZAKHSTAN
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KAZAKHSTAN
UZBEKISTAN
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This my town of Kuzcek.
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This Urkin, the town rapist.
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Naughty, naughty.
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Over here, our town kindergarten.
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And here live Mukhtar Sakanov,
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00:01:53,864 --> 00:01:56,574
town mechanic and abortionist.
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This my house. Entry, please.
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He is my neighbor, Nursultan Tulyakbay.
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He is pain in my assholes.
24
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l get a window from a glass,
he must get a window from a glass.
25
00:02:10,672 --> 00:02:13,382
l get a step, he must get a step.
26
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l get a clock radio, he cannot afford.
27
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Great success.
28
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This is Natalya.
29
00:02:26,855 --> 00:02:29,357
She is my sister.
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She is number four prostitute
in all of Kazakhstan.
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Nice.
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This is my mother.
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She oldest woman in whole of Kuzcek.
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She is 43. I love her.
35
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And this my wife, Oxana. She's boring.
36
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What you say about me,
you skinny piece of shit?
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Not now, please.
38
00:02:54,132 --> 00:02:55,466
Why don't you do something
useful and dig your mother a grave.
39
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Come in here, please. lgnore.
40
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And this is where I lives. My bed.
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This is a VCR recorder.
42
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And this play cassettes.
43
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Now I show you outside from my houses.
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My hobbies, Ping-Pong,
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sunbathe,
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disco dance,
47
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and on weekends, I travel to capital city
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and watch ladies while they make toilet.
49
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My profession, work as
a television reporter for Kazakhstan.
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Please, you see.
51
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THE RUNNlNG OF THE JEW 2004
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Here comes the Jew.
53
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lt's a big one this year.
54
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Whoaaa...
He nearly got the money there.
55
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Wait, here comes Mrs. Jew.
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She's stopped.
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ls she? ls she?
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Here it comes.
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She's laid a Jew egg.
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00:04:40,322 --> 00:04:43,366
Go kids! Crush that
Jew chick before he hatches!
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00:04:44,993 --> 00:04:50,206
Although Kazakhstan glorious country,
it have problem too.
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Economic, social and Jew.
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This why Ministry of lnformation
have decide to send me to U.S. and A,
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greatest country in the world,
to learn lessons for Kazakhstan.
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l will travel with most venerable
producer, Azamat Bagatov.
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Azamat.
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No, not film me!
Film him.
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Urkin, not too much raping...
Humans only.
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Doltan, I'll get you
a new arm in America.
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l go to America!
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America!
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Wave goodbye to your
clock radio, asshole!
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lf you cheat on me,
l will come over there
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and snap off your cock.
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JFK lNTERNATlONAL AlRPORT
New York City
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I arrived in America's airport
with clothings, U.S. dollars
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and a jar of Gypsy tears
to protect me from AIDS.
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00:07:04,257 --> 00:07:06,717
Stand cIear of the cIosing doors, pIease.
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Hello, my name Borat.
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l not American. I new in town.
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Nice to meet you.
82
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Hello, nice meet you.
83
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Hey, what your name?
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My name is mind your own
fucking business.
85
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Stand cIear of the cIosing doors, pIease.
86
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Oh, hello. Nice meet you.
87
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My name Borat.
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-What's happening?
-Nice meet you.
89
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Get the fuck out of here
before I break yourjaw, bro.
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-Yo, step the fuck off, bro.
-Okay. Okay.
91
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-You're fucking with the wrong one, man.
-Okay. Sorry.
92
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Oh, shit. Okay, okay, wait.
93
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l get it. Please, relax.
94
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l'll get him! Careful, he bite.
95
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-Hey, man, what are you doing?
-Okay, relax.
96
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Okay. Okay.
97
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Okay, okay, relax.
98
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Okay. Okay, wait.
99
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Okay, no problem. Sorry.
100
00:08:11,533 --> 00:08:13,325
Welcome to the Wellington Hotel.
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Do you want to pay for
the entire stay now?
102
00:08:14,536 --> 00:08:15,619
GUY BORGES
Manager, Wellington Hotel
103
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-l pay for one night. How much?
-Fine.
104
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One night is $117.13.
105
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We'll call it 85.
106
00:08:25,380 --> 00:08:27,965
No, we can call it 117.
107
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Let me get the door for you. Come on in.
108
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Very nice.
109
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Very nice room.
110
00:08:39,394 --> 00:08:41,645
We're not in the room yet, sir. Hold on.
111
00:08:41,730 --> 00:08:44,690
You might want to repack.
We're gonna be moving again shortly.
112
00:08:44,774 --> 00:08:46,650
l will not move to a smaller room.
113
00:08:46,735 --> 00:08:49,612
Sir, this is your floor.
l'm gonna take you to your room.
114
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-This is not my room?
-This is the elevator.
115
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lt takes you to the floor
where your room is.
116
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Nice. Nice.
117
00:09:03,126 --> 00:09:05,836
King in the castle. King in the castle.
118
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l have a chair. I have a chair.
119
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Oh, go do this. Go do this.
King in the castle.
120
00:09:22,646 --> 00:09:24,563
Hello, nice meet you. My name Borat.
121
00:09:24,648 --> 00:09:26,065
l am new in town.
122
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-Get away from me.
-l just... I kiss you, say hello.
123
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lt arrive.
124
00:09:49,631 --> 00:09:51,924
Hello, my name Borat. I am new in town.
125
00:09:52,008 --> 00:09:54,718
-l say hello and l...
-Do not touch me.
126
00:09:54,803 --> 00:09:57,596
-Do not get near my face.
-l kiss you.
127
00:09:57,681 --> 00:10:00,391
Yeah, you kiss me,
l'll pop you in the fucking balls.
128
00:10:00,475 --> 00:10:01,517
What mean, "Balls"?
129
00:10:02,686 --> 00:10:04,436
Very nice.
130
00:10:10,902 --> 00:10:12,403
Very nice. How much?
131
00:10:13,029 --> 00:10:15,281
Hello, nice meet you. My name Borat.
132
00:10:15,365 --> 00:10:18,951
Get away! What are you doing?
133
00:10:19,035 --> 00:10:22,496
Wait, I want to say hello.
What is the problem?
134
00:10:32,173 --> 00:10:35,259
This has been
most happiest day of my Iifes.
135
00:10:35,343 --> 00:10:38,178
I was very excite to start my reportings.
136
00:10:38,888 --> 00:10:41,432
America is known for its
sense of humor.
137
00:10:41,808 --> 00:10:44,143
UN survey say Kazakhstan
have 98th lowest humor.
138
00:10:45,395 --> 00:10:46,729
We must improve.
139
00:10:49,441 --> 00:10:50,691
Hurry, hurry.
140
00:10:51,651 --> 00:10:54,695
Just dry him, no hand relief.
141
00:10:57,699 --> 00:10:58,741
How is my back pussy?
142
00:10:58,825 --> 00:11:01,035
Not bad. Moist.
143
00:11:01,119 --> 00:11:03,037
So what time this interview?
144
00:11:03,455 --> 00:11:04,955
Soon, my friend.
145
00:11:12,088 --> 00:11:13,339
Gently.
146
00:11:16,134 --> 00:11:17,134
Enough!
147
00:11:18,303 --> 00:11:20,637
-Hello. My name's Pat Haggerty.
-Hello.
148
00:11:20,722 --> 00:11:21,930
PAT HAGGERTY
Humor Coach
149
00:11:22,015 --> 00:11:24,016
-Nice meet you. Borat.
-Nice to meet you.
150
00:11:24,100 --> 00:11:27,019
Should I make a joke
about my mother-in-law?
151
00:11:27,103 --> 00:11:29,772
Yes. ln America, that's a very popularjoke.
152
00:11:29,856 --> 00:11:32,316
-Do you have a mother-in-lawjoke?
-Yes.
153
00:11:32,400 --> 00:11:36,779
l had sexy-time with my mother-in-law.
154
00:11:36,863 --> 00:11:38,655
-A what time?
-Sexy-time.
155
00:11:38,740 --> 00:11:41,492
l made sexy-time with my mother-in-law.
156
00:11:41,576 --> 00:11:44,828
-You had sex with your mother-in-law?
-Yes.
157
00:11:44,913 --> 00:11:47,373
l don't think that Americans
would find that funny.
158
00:11:47,457 --> 00:11:49,541
-No, it is not a joke.
-Yeah.
159
00:11:49,626 --> 00:11:52,211
We're talking about humor.
160
00:11:52,295 --> 00:11:54,546
Yes, you asked me about
my mother-in-law.
161
00:11:54,631 --> 00:11:57,257
Do you have a joke about her?
162
00:11:57,342 --> 00:12:00,010
No, why make a joke on a mother-in-law?
163
00:12:02,222 --> 00:12:05,599
Do you ever laugh on people
with a retardation?
164
00:12:05,683 --> 00:12:09,937
Here in America we try not to make fun of
165
00:12:10,021 --> 00:12:13,023
or be funny with things
that people don't choose.
166
00:12:13,108 --> 00:12:18,779
But perhaps you have not seen
someone with a very funny retardation.
167
00:12:18,863 --> 00:12:24,660
My brother, Bilo,
have a very funny retardation.
168
00:12:25,870 --> 00:12:30,416
Mental retardation causes a lot of pain
and hardship for a lot of families.
169
00:12:30,500 --> 00:12:35,921
Sometime my sister, she show her
vagina to my brother, Bilo, and say,
170
00:12:36,005 --> 00:12:39,758
"You will never get this!
You will never get this!"
171
00:12:39,843 --> 00:12:43,095
He behind his cage, crazy, crazy.
Everybody laugh.
172
00:12:43,179 --> 00:12:45,013
She go, "You never get this!"
173
00:12:45,098 --> 00:12:49,601
But one time,
he break cage and he get this.
174
00:12:49,686 --> 00:12:51,186
And then we all laugh.
175
00:12:51,271 --> 00:12:52,646
High five!
176
00:12:54,315 --> 00:12:55,524
Now...
177
00:12:59,279 --> 00:13:02,781
No, that would not be funny
in America, okay?
178
00:13:02,866 --> 00:13:05,826
What is "not" jokes?
179
00:13:05,910 --> 00:13:09,705
A "not" joke is when we're trying
to make fun of something
180
00:13:09,789 --> 00:13:13,917
and what we do is we make
a statement that we pretend is true
181
00:13:14,002 --> 00:13:17,754
but, at the end, we say, "Not,"
which means it's not true.
182
00:13:17,839 --> 00:13:19,173
So teach me how to make one.
183
00:13:19,257 --> 00:13:22,259
-All right, what color is your suit?
-This suit is gray.
184
00:13:22,343 --> 00:13:23,927
Gray, I would call it blue, okay?
185
00:13:24,012 --> 00:13:25,554
-lt's gray.
-All right, it's blue-gray.
186
00:13:25,638 --> 00:13:28,307
But it's certainly not black, right?
187
00:13:28,391 --> 00:13:31,101
-Let's say it's gray, but...
-lt is gray.
188
00:13:32,270 --> 00:13:35,147
Okay, so a "not" joke, I would say
189
00:13:35,231 --> 00:13:38,150
"That suit is black. Not!"
190
00:13:38,234 --> 00:13:41,487
This suit is not black.
191
00:13:41,571 --> 00:13:44,323
-No, no, "Not" has to be the end.
-Oh, okay.
192
00:13:44,407 --> 00:13:46,533
This suit is black not.
193
00:13:46,618 --> 00:13:49,453
This suit is black, pause...
You know what a pause is?
194
00:13:49,537 --> 00:13:52,831
-Yes.
-This suit is black. Not!
195
00:13:52,916 --> 00:13:56,168
This suit is black. Pause. Not.
196
00:13:56,252 --> 00:13:58,253
No, you don't say "pause."
197
00:13:58,338 --> 00:14:00,088
This suit is black.
198
00:14:01,341 --> 00:14:03,175
That's a pause. Not!
199
00:14:03,927 --> 00:14:05,636
This suit is black.
200
00:14:07,639 --> 00:14:08,931
Okay...
201
00:14:10,099 --> 00:14:11,850
-l don't... l'm not...
-Not!
202
00:14:17,106 --> 00:14:19,858
Everybody say U.S.A.
television much better
203
00:14:19,943 --> 00:14:22,986
but this I watch for three hours,
do not change.
204
00:14:23,071 --> 00:14:24,696
There's a remote control here.
205
00:14:24,781 --> 00:14:27,282
Push these two arrows
to change the channel.
206
00:14:30,537 --> 00:14:31,537
I got him, I got him, I got him!
207
00:14:33,122 --> 00:14:35,707
I have the urge to bury something eIse.
208
00:14:35,792 --> 00:14:36,875
Yes!
209
00:14:38,628 --> 00:14:42,172
-I Iove you.
-I Iove you too, Jamie.
210
00:14:42,257 --> 00:14:43,966
I Iove you.
211
00:15:03,361 --> 00:15:06,905
-Do you beIieve in magic, Miss...
-Parker, C.J.
212
00:15:07,615 --> 00:15:09,700
It's a pIeasure to meet you, C.J.
213
00:15:14,122 --> 00:15:16,915
Be careful! Be careful, C.J. !
214
00:15:17,000 --> 00:15:21,753
This C.J. was Iike no
Kazakh woman I had ever seen.
215
00:15:21,838 --> 00:15:26,758
She had goIden hairs,
teeth as white as pearIs
216
00:15:26,843 --> 00:15:29,344
and the asshoIe of a 7-year-oId.
217
00:15:30,597 --> 00:15:33,390
For the first time in my Iifes,
218
00:15:33,474 --> 00:15:35,100
I was in Iove.
219
00:15:39,981 --> 00:15:41,690
Get up! Get up!
220
00:15:41,774 --> 00:15:43,900
Why aren't you ready!
221
00:15:43,985 --> 00:15:45,652
We have people to interview today.
222
00:15:45,737 --> 00:15:46,737
l understand.
223
00:15:47,572 --> 00:15:49,948
Learn what you can from
this women's group.
224
00:15:50,283 --> 00:15:52,951
-My hair?
-lt's beautiful. Don't worry.
225
00:15:55,872 --> 00:16:00,542
ln Kazakhstan it is illegal for more than
five woman to be in the same place
226
00:16:00,627 --> 00:16:03,420
except for in brothel or in grave.
227
00:16:03,504 --> 00:16:07,841
ln the U.S. and A., many womens meet
in groups called Feminists.
228
00:16:07,925 --> 00:16:09,176
l find more.
229
00:16:11,721 --> 00:16:12,804
VETERAN FEMlNlSTS
OF AMERlCA
230
00:16:12,889 --> 00:16:14,806
So, what means this feminism?
231
00:16:14,891 --> 00:16:19,811
lt's the theory that women
should be equal to men
232
00:16:19,896 --> 00:16:23,315
in matters economic, social...
233
00:16:23,399 --> 00:16:25,651
-Now you are laughing.
-Yes.
234
00:16:25,735 --> 00:16:27,653
Well, that is the problem.
235
00:16:27,737 --> 00:16:30,364
Do you think a woman should be educate?
236
00:16:30,448 --> 00:16:31,740
Definitely.
237
00:16:31,824 --> 00:16:36,161
But is it not a problem that a woman
have a smaller brain than a man?
238
00:16:36,245 --> 00:16:37,496
That is wrong.
239
00:16:37,580 --> 00:16:41,458
But the government scientist,
Dr. Yamak, prove it's the size of squirrel.
240
00:16:41,542 --> 00:16:43,251
Your government's scientist?
241
00:16:43,336 --> 00:16:46,046
-Yes, Dr. Yamak.
-He's wrong. He's wrong.
242
00:16:46,130 --> 00:16:48,590
Give me a smile, baby. Why angry face?
243
00:16:48,675 --> 00:16:52,552
Well, what you're saying
is very demeaning.
244
00:16:52,637 --> 00:16:55,263
-Do you know the word "demeaning"?
-No.
245
00:16:56,015 --> 00:16:57,182
We are saying to you...
246
00:16:57,266 --> 00:17:01,144
I couId not concentrate on what
this oId man was saying.
247
00:17:02,897 --> 00:17:07,901
AII I couId think about was this
IoveIy woman in her red water-panties.
248
00:17:07,985 --> 00:17:10,028
Who was this C.J.?
249
00:17:10,113 --> 00:17:13,615
Last night I see in my hotel room
250
00:17:14,617 --> 00:17:17,452
a woman called C.J. on the television.
251
00:17:17,537 --> 00:17:19,538
-Do you know her?
-No.
252
00:17:19,622 --> 00:17:22,916
She from a town called Baywatches.
253
00:17:23,000 --> 00:17:25,711
-She's just on television.
-Her name is Pamela.
254
00:17:25,795 --> 00:17:28,714
-Do she live here in New York City?
-She lives in California.
255
00:17:28,798 --> 00:17:31,216
-ln the California.
-He's gonna look her up.
256
00:17:31,300 --> 00:17:32,801
Okay, can we finish now?
257
00:17:32,885 --> 00:17:34,678
Listen, pussycat, smile a bit.
258
00:17:34,762 --> 00:17:38,432
-All right. That's it. l'm done.
-We're finished. We have to leave.
259
00:17:40,393 --> 00:17:45,897
AIthough I was obsessed
by this C.J., I couId not pursue her
260
00:17:45,982 --> 00:17:48,817
or eIse my wife wouId snap off my cock.
261
00:17:53,239 --> 00:17:55,157
Mr. Sagdiyev?
262
00:17:55,241 --> 00:17:58,034
-Yes?
-l have a telegram for you.
263
00:17:58,119 --> 00:18:00,662
-You can read?
-Yes, I can.
264
00:18:02,331 --> 00:18:04,458
"Dear Borat Sagdiyev,
265
00:18:04,542 --> 00:18:07,377
"your wife, Oxna,
266
00:18:07,462 --> 00:18:12,966
"was walking your retarded Bilo
in the woods
267
00:18:13,050 --> 00:18:16,887
"when a bear attacked
and violated and break her.
268
00:18:16,971 --> 00:18:19,264
"She is now dead."
269
00:18:19,348 --> 00:18:21,767
You say my wife is dead?
270
00:18:23,019 --> 00:18:24,853
This is what it's...
271
00:18:32,153 --> 00:18:36,406
Yes, sir. l'm sorry to inform you,
but that's what the telegram says.
272
00:18:37,909 --> 00:18:39,951
High five! Great!
273
00:18:54,884 --> 00:18:57,427
What do you mean, California?
274
00:18:57,512 --> 00:19:00,305
l have arranged all our filming
for New York.
275
00:19:00,890 --> 00:19:03,642
But we need to leave New York
to find the real America:
276
00:19:03,726 --> 00:19:07,103
rodeos, cowboys...
lt will be better for our documentary.
277
00:19:07,855 --> 00:19:09,648
But why California?
What's there?
278
00:19:11,943 --> 00:19:14,402
Pearl Harbor is there...
And so is Texas.
279
00:19:14,487 --> 00:19:19,241
EventuaIIy, I persuade Azamat
that we wouId traveI to CaIifornia
280
00:19:19,325 --> 00:19:22,077
and make our reportings aIong the way.
281
00:19:22,620 --> 00:19:28,083
He insists we not fIy in case the Jews
repeated their attack of 9/11.
282
00:19:28,835 --> 00:19:31,586
Okay, I'll find another way
for us to get there.
283
00:19:32,380 --> 00:19:34,464
My name is Mike.
l'm gonna be your driving instructor.
284
00:19:34,549 --> 00:19:36,007
MlCHAEL PSENlCSKA
Perry Hall Driving School
285
00:19:36,092 --> 00:19:37,092
Welcome to our country, okay.
286
00:19:37,218 --> 00:19:38,635
-My name Borat.
-Okay, okay. Good, good.
287
00:19:38,719 --> 00:19:41,263
Well, l'm not used to that, but that's fine.
288
00:19:42,557 --> 00:19:44,599
Now, you do know how to drive a little bit?
289
00:19:44,684 --> 00:19:47,227
-Yes.
-Yes. Put it in D.
290
00:19:47,979 --> 00:19:49,521
-What?
-Drive.
291
00:19:53,150 --> 00:19:55,819
Now, wait a second. Wait a second.
292
00:19:55,903 --> 00:19:58,738
-Have you driven a car before?
-Yes, many times.
293
00:19:58,823 --> 00:20:00,156
All right, let's go this way.
294
00:20:00,241 --> 00:20:02,492
l don't want you hitting anybody.
295
00:20:02,577 --> 00:20:04,286
Use two hands, now.
296
00:20:05,496 --> 00:20:07,122
-What?
-Two hands.
297
00:20:07,206 --> 00:20:10,375
But then it look like I am holding
a Gypsy while he eat my chram.
298
00:20:10,459 --> 00:20:13,837
l don't care.
You use two hands when you drive, okay?
299
00:20:14,171 --> 00:20:15,463
Okay.
300
00:20:19,635 --> 00:20:22,095
-Okay.
-Watch the children.
301
00:20:22,179 --> 00:20:24,097
Okay, no problem.
302
00:20:24,181 --> 00:20:26,808
You must not hit the children.
303
00:20:26,893 --> 00:20:28,894
Look, there is a woman in a car.
304
00:20:28,978 --> 00:20:30,186
Can we follow her?
305
00:20:30,271 --> 00:20:32,647
-And maybe make sexy-time with her?
-No, no, no.
306
00:20:32,732 --> 00:20:34,649
-Let's get her. Why not?
-No, no, no.
307
00:20:34,734 --> 00:20:38,862
Because a woman has a right
to choose who she has sex with.
308
00:20:38,946 --> 00:20:41,364
-What? You joke?
-How about that? lsn't that amazing?
309
00:20:41,449 --> 00:20:44,576
There must be consent. How about that?
310
00:20:45,328 --> 00:20:46,661
That's good, huh?
311
00:20:46,746 --> 00:20:49,623
-ls not good for me.
-lt is good.
312
00:20:49,707 --> 00:20:51,583
-Steer the car.
-Okay.
313
00:20:51,667 --> 00:20:54,085
-You want have a drink?
-You can't drink that.
314
00:20:54,170 --> 00:20:56,755
-Why not? What?
-lt's against the law.
315
00:20:59,008 --> 00:21:01,885
Who is this car that follow us?
l wish it didn't follow us.
316
00:21:01,969 --> 00:21:03,762
-l don't know.
-Maybe we'll lose them.
317
00:21:03,846 --> 00:21:05,680
No, we better not lose them.
318
00:21:06,682 --> 00:21:09,726
Hey, don't look at me. Eat my tits!
319
00:21:09,810 --> 00:21:11,603
We'll make a right turn up here.
320
00:21:11,687 --> 00:21:14,856
Don't look at me like that.
l will eat your shit.
321
00:21:14,941 --> 00:21:16,983
-Hey, you fuck my mother!
-Hey, hey.
322
00:21:17,068 --> 00:21:19,611
-No, he do before. He look on me.
-You can't do that.
323
00:21:19,695 --> 00:21:22,155
They're gonna throw us in jail,
me with you.
324
00:21:22,239 --> 00:21:24,783
Why in a jail? He look on me.
325
00:21:24,867 --> 00:21:27,285
-Behind.
-You can't say that.
326
00:21:27,370 --> 00:21:28,954
l like you, do you like me?
327
00:21:29,038 --> 00:21:31,539
-l do like you.
-You are my friend?
328
00:21:31,624 --> 00:21:33,625
You're nice and I am your friend.
329
00:21:33,709 --> 00:21:35,001
You will be my boyfriend?
330
00:21:35,086 --> 00:21:38,380
-l won't be your boyfriend.
-Why not? You do not like me?
331
00:21:38,464 --> 00:21:41,841
l could be. lt depends.
Well, boyfriend, yeah, I can.
332
00:21:42,885 --> 00:21:44,469
Great success.
333
00:21:44,553 --> 00:21:47,639
Now time to make purchase of motorcars.
334
00:21:47,723 --> 00:21:52,018
l want to have a car that attract
a woman with a shave down below.
335
00:21:52,895 --> 00:21:54,938
Well, that would be a Corvette
or a Hummer.
336
00:21:55,022 --> 00:21:56,189
JlM SELL
GM Salesman
337
00:21:56,273 --> 00:21:58,400
We will try to help you out here.
338
00:21:59,902 --> 00:22:03,530
A man yesterday tell me if I buy a car
339
00:22:03,614 --> 00:22:05,824
l must buy one with a pussy magnet.
340
00:22:05,908 --> 00:22:07,784
He means a car that women will like.
341
00:22:07,868 --> 00:22:09,995
Yes, but where you keep this magnet?
342
00:22:10,079 --> 00:22:12,831
No, there's no magnet. That was just...
He means the vehicle.
343
00:22:12,915 --> 00:22:14,249
Women love the Hummers.
344
00:22:14,333 --> 00:22:16,835
-Do this have a pussy magnet?
-No.
345
00:22:16,919 --> 00:22:18,586
The vehicle itself will be a magnet.
346
00:22:18,671 --> 00:22:24,050
lf I give you good price,
will you please put in pussy magnet?
347
00:22:24,135 --> 00:22:28,054
Yeah, but there's no such thing
in this country as a magnet.
348
00:22:28,639 --> 00:22:31,975
lf this car drive into a group of Gypsy,
349
00:22:32,059 --> 00:22:34,185
will there be any damage to the car?
350
00:22:34,270 --> 00:22:37,188
-lt depends on how hard you hit them.
-Hard.
351
00:22:37,273 --> 00:22:38,690
Yeah, hard. You might,
352
00:22:38,774 --> 00:22:42,527
if somebody rolls on the windshield,
crack your windshield.
353
00:22:42,611 --> 00:22:45,864
How fast do I need to go
to guarantee I kill him?
354
00:22:45,948 --> 00:22:48,825
Let me tell you something,
with this vehicle, probably doing 35,
355
00:22:48,909 --> 00:22:51,369
-40 miles an hour would do it.
-Great.
356
00:22:51,454 --> 00:22:55,123
When I buy my wife,
357
00:22:55,207 --> 00:22:58,376
at the start, she was cook good,
358
00:22:58,461 --> 00:23:01,796
her vagina work well
and she strong on plow.
359
00:23:01,881 --> 00:23:05,091
But after three years, when she was 15,
360
00:23:05,176 --> 00:23:10,722
then she become weak, her voice
become deep, "Borat, Borat."
361
00:23:10,806 --> 00:23:14,726
She receive hair on chest
362
00:23:14,810 --> 00:23:18,313
and her vagina hang like sleeve of wizard.
363
00:23:18,397 --> 00:23:20,523
Huh. Jeez.
364
00:23:20,983 --> 00:23:24,819
How do I know that
this will not happen with a car?
365
00:23:25,738 --> 00:23:28,156
Chevrolet guarantees that with a warranty.
366
00:23:28,240 --> 00:23:31,117
l like very much buy this Hummers.
367
00:23:31,202 --> 00:23:33,745
-How much is it?
-52,000.
368
00:23:34,163 --> 00:23:40,752
l am looking for something between
$600 to $650.
369
00:23:40,836 --> 00:23:43,838
We don't have any cars for 650
that you can buy.
370
00:23:43,923 --> 00:23:46,049
l might be able to sell you a wholesale car.
371
00:23:46,133 --> 00:23:48,551
A car with a lot of miles for 700
with no warranty.
372
00:23:48,636 --> 00:23:49,886
-Okay.
-Come on.
373
00:24:02,441 --> 00:24:04,567
California, I coming!
374
00:24:14,411 --> 00:24:17,914
First stops on our journey
was Washington, D.C.,
375
00:24:17,998 --> 00:24:21,459
home of mighty U.S. warIord,
Premier Bush.
376
00:24:22,628 --> 00:24:23,837
Look who has an embassy here!
377
00:24:23,921 --> 00:24:27,382
Uzbekistan. Fuck you, motherfuckers!
378
00:24:28,259 --> 00:24:31,636
We arrive here to Iearn
from American poIitic.
379
00:24:32,096 --> 00:24:35,849
Azamat arrange interview
with Party officiaI from ruIing regime.
380
00:24:35,933 --> 00:24:37,100
BOB BARR
Former Georgia Congressman
381
00:24:37,184 --> 00:24:41,062
-We are good friend, Bob Barr, yes?
-l hope so.
382
00:24:41,230 --> 00:24:46,234
lt is a custom have cheese at the start.
383
00:24:47,820 --> 00:24:49,154
Thank you.
384
00:24:49,697 --> 00:24:53,283
My wife, she make this cheese.
385
00:24:53,367 --> 00:24:54,951
Very nice.
386
00:24:55,035 --> 00:24:57,537
She make it from milk from her tit.
387
00:25:05,796 --> 00:25:11,134
After interview, I encounters
traditionaI American street festivaI.
388
00:25:12,219 --> 00:25:15,513
GAY PRlDE PARADE
389
00:25:17,558 --> 00:25:21,603
PeopIe here were much more friendIy
than in New York.
390
00:25:28,027 --> 00:25:33,364
Next morning, I interview poIitician
who is a genuine chocoIate-face.
391
00:25:33,449 --> 00:25:34,991
No makeup.
392
00:25:35,075 --> 00:25:36,284
ALAN KEYES
2-time Republican Presidential Candidate
393
00:25:36,368 --> 00:25:38,703
On Sunday, I arrive in Washington.
394
00:25:38,787 --> 00:25:40,538
There was a parade.
395
00:25:40,623 --> 00:25:43,875
l make two friends from this parade.
396
00:25:43,959 --> 00:25:46,794
l invite them back my hotel room.
397
00:25:46,879 --> 00:25:49,505
We drink Iike normaI in Kazakhstan.
398
00:25:49,590 --> 00:25:52,217
We wrestIe Iike normaI in Kazakhstan.
399
00:25:52,301 --> 00:25:56,471
Then they say, "I wash you in a shower,"
and he wash me in a shower.
400
00:25:56,805 --> 00:25:59,933
lt sounds like
you met somebody who is from
401
00:26:00,017 --> 00:26:02,352
what is called in America,
the gay community.
402
00:26:02,436 --> 00:26:05,355
-What it mean, "Gay," this word?
-Homosexual.
403
00:26:05,814 --> 00:26:07,857
A homosexual? You mean. . .
404
00:26:13,822 --> 00:26:17,951
Are you telling me the man
who try to put a rubber fist in my anus
405
00:26:18,035 --> 00:26:19,827
was a homosexual?
406
00:26:25,334 --> 00:26:27,961
Even though my anus was broken
407
00:26:28,045 --> 00:26:32,090
I knew that rest of our journey
wouId be great success.
408
00:26:32,174 --> 00:26:35,969
We Ieft Washington
and continued towards CaIifornia.
409
00:26:36,345 --> 00:26:37,720
Howdy, partners!
410
00:26:38,931 --> 00:26:41,849
Yes, minister, we're on schedule.
411
00:26:42,685 --> 00:26:45,186
Yes, l'm standing in
the middle of Times Square.
412
00:26:45,938 --> 00:26:48,481
lt's time to prepare for your
TV appearance.
413
00:26:48,565 --> 00:26:51,943
Remember to talk of singing
national anthem at rodeo.
414
00:26:52,027 --> 00:26:53,945
Don't worry, I am a TV professional.
415
00:26:54,571 --> 00:26:57,282
Now, buiIding our station around you.
416
00:26:57,366 --> 00:27:00,618
This is 16 WAPT News This Morning,
417
00:27:00,703 --> 00:27:04,289
named best newscast in the state
by the Associated Press.
418
00:27:04,373 --> 00:27:07,250
This morning we have
a special guest here in the studio.
419
00:27:07,334 --> 00:27:09,377
This is Borhat Sagadiyev.
420
00:27:09,461 --> 00:27:13,131
He is traveling across America to get
the taste of life here in the United States.
421
00:27:13,215 --> 00:27:15,091
He spent the last few days here.
422
00:27:15,175 --> 00:27:18,469
-Good morning to you.
-Hello, my name Borat. Hello.
423
00:27:18,554 --> 00:27:20,638
Hello. Thank you.
424
00:27:21,682 --> 00:27:25,685
Before we start, can you tell me,
because I want make urines,
425
00:27:25,769 --> 00:27:29,063
then I come back here and. . .
426
00:27:29,148 --> 00:27:31,858
lf you tell me one minute before we start. . .
427
00:27:31,942 --> 00:27:35,987
We started.
We are actually live on the air right now.
428
00:27:36,071 --> 00:27:38,448
-l am very excite.
-Yes.
429
00:27:38,532 --> 00:27:43,119
Hello, U .S. and A. ! Hello, U .S. and A. !
l'm very excite!
430
00:27:43,203 --> 00:27:45,496
l'm very excite to be here.
431
00:27:45,581 --> 00:27:47,081
And hello!
432
00:27:48,167 --> 00:27:49,751
Hello to you as well.
433
00:27:49,835 --> 00:27:52,754
Now, real quickly, why are you here
in the United States?
434
00:27:52,838 --> 00:27:57,508
Because I want to learn from U .S. and A,
435
00:27:57,593 --> 00:28:04,515
your culture, and to understand
from how a thing happen
436
00:28:04,600 --> 00:28:07,352
and to take this lesson
back to my country.
437
00:28:07,436 --> 00:28:10,104
-All right. Would you like to have a seat?
-Yes.
438
00:28:10,189 --> 00:28:12,023
Please sit, please sit, please sit.
439
00:28:12,107 --> 00:28:14,567
Now, one of the things
that you've enjoyed so much about. . .
440
00:28:14,651 --> 00:28:17,862
Can I have a microphone
so people can hear me?
441
00:28:17,946 --> 00:28:20,323
They can hear you right now.
You are miked up.
442
00:28:20,407 --> 00:28:22,116
This right here, that's the microphone.
443
00:28:22,201 --> 00:28:24,994
Hello. Hello, nice meet you.
444
00:28:25,788 --> 00:28:29,707
Well, welcome to the United States.
Thank you very much for coming on.
445
00:28:29,792 --> 00:28:32,251
When you come to Kazakhstan,
446
00:28:32,336 --> 00:28:35,213
-you can stay in my house.
-Well, thank you so much.
447
00:28:35,297 --> 00:28:38,007
You can sleep my house
and you can use my sister.
448
00:28:38,092 --> 00:28:40,301
Meteorologist Ken Johnson
will have the latest
449
00:28:40,386 --> 00:28:43,179
on tropical storm Emily when we return.
450
00:28:43,764 --> 00:28:45,431
Ten seconds, stand by.
451
00:28:45,724 --> 00:28:49,602
This is 16 WAPT News This Morning.
452
00:28:49,728 --> 00:28:52,397
Traffic is flowing along smoothly
along lnterstate 55.
453
00:28:52,481 --> 00:28:54,816
Dry conditions.
lf you're heading to the north,
454
00:28:54,900 --> 00:28:57,902
not too far away from Attala County,
there's some showers there.
455
00:28:57,986 --> 00:29:01,239
Check that out on
the radar this morning and. . .
456
00:29:01,323 --> 00:29:04,575
Thank you, very nice for have me.
457
00:29:04,660 --> 00:29:06,119
What your name?
458
00:29:06,203 --> 00:29:08,246
We're on air right now doing the weather.
459
00:29:08,330 --> 00:29:10,581
-What your name?
-We're doing the weather right now.
460
00:29:10,666 --> 00:29:13,793
Go over here with Adrian.
She's calling you to go over here.
461
00:29:13,877 --> 00:29:15,670
-lt is a she?
-Yes.
462
00:29:15,754 --> 00:29:19,006
-Very nice.
-Yeah, go. Go. . .
463
00:29:20,884 --> 00:29:22,885
-Go over here with. . .
-What is your name?
464
00:29:22,970 --> 00:29:24,720
l'm the weather guy.
465
00:29:26,849 --> 00:29:28,015
Okay. . .
466
00:29:30,477 --> 00:29:33,855
Let's go over to the weather.
You can see the radar, right now
467
00:29:33,939 --> 00:29:37,483
showing some showers
and storms up to the north. . .
468
00:29:37,568 --> 00:29:40,403
Okay. All right, let me. . .
469
00:29:40,487 --> 00:29:41,821
Nice to meet you.
470
00:29:41,905 --> 00:29:45,032
Showers and storms north of Yazoo City
up towards Kosciusko. . .
471
00:29:45,117 --> 00:29:46,868
Thank you, bye-bye.
472
00:29:49,163 --> 00:29:51,038
You're singing at a rodeo tonight!
473
00:29:51,123 --> 00:29:53,624
Why didn't you mention it?
474
00:29:53,709 --> 00:29:56,335
What can I do, they are not
professional.
475
00:29:57,337 --> 00:30:01,215
Get a move on, we have
100 miles to go.
476
00:30:03,343 --> 00:30:05,636
We weIcome you to the 38th annuaI
477
00:30:05,721 --> 00:30:09,056
Kroger VaIIeydaIe Championship Rodeo.
478
00:30:30,662 --> 00:30:33,414
Of course, every picture that we get back
479
00:30:33,499 --> 00:30:34,665
BOBBY ROWE
General Manager, lmperial Rodeo
480
00:30:34,750 --> 00:30:40,046
from the terrorists or anything else,
the Muslims, they look like you,
481
00:30:40,130 --> 00:30:42,340
-black hair and a black mustache.
-Yes.
482
00:30:42,424 --> 00:30:46,636
Shave that dadgummed mustache off
so you're not so conspicuous.
483
00:30:46,720 --> 00:30:49,972
So you look like maybe an ltalian
or something
484
00:30:50,057 --> 00:30:52,850
as far as when people looking at you.
485
00:30:52,935 --> 00:30:55,394
l see a lot of people and I think,
"There's a dadgummed Muslim.
486
00:30:55,479 --> 00:30:58,356
"l wonder what kind of bomb
he's got strapped to him."
487
00:30:58,440 --> 00:31:00,816
-Yes.
-And you probably aren't a Muslim.
488
00:31:00,901 --> 00:31:04,362
-Maybe that's not your religion.
-No, I am a Kazakh. I follow the hawk.
489
00:31:04,446 --> 00:31:06,739
But you look like one of them.
490
00:31:06,823 --> 00:31:09,200
This thing gets over with
and when we win it
491
00:31:09,284 --> 00:31:11,118
and kick the butts over there
492
00:31:11,203 --> 00:31:13,412
and all of them son-of-a-bucks
hanging from the gallows,
493
00:31:13,497 --> 00:31:16,624
by that time, you will have proven yourself
494
00:31:16,708 --> 00:31:18,543
and you'll be accepted.
495
00:31:18,627 --> 00:31:19,794
-Take care.
-Thank you.
496
00:31:19,878 --> 00:31:22,213
-l ain't gonna kiss you.
-Why not?
497
00:31:22,297 --> 00:31:25,883
The people that do the kissing
are the ones that float around like that.
498
00:31:25,968 --> 00:31:29,136
-Are they all. . .
-Yeah. Stay away from them that kiss.
499
00:31:29,221 --> 00:31:30,972
-Okay.
-You don't want nobody kissing.
500
00:31:31,056 --> 00:31:35,101
ln my country they take them to jail
and finish them.
501
00:31:35,185 --> 00:31:36,811
-Take them and hang them.
-Yes.
502
00:31:36,895 --> 00:31:39,814
-That's what we're trying to get done.
-High five.
503
00:31:40,607 --> 00:31:42,191
Ladies and gentIemen of SaIem, Virginia,
504
00:31:42,276 --> 00:31:44,986
wouId you pIease give a warm,
American weIcome
505
00:31:45,070 --> 00:31:48,906
to a gentIeman who has come
aII the way from Kazakhstan
506
00:31:48,991 --> 00:31:52,702
and we are honored
to have singing our nationaI anthem.
507
00:31:52,786 --> 00:31:56,163
Ladies and gentIemen, Borat Sagdiyev.
508
00:32:05,591 --> 00:32:09,135
My name Borat. I come from Kazakhstan.
509
00:32:09,219 --> 00:32:14,599
Can I say first,
we support your war of terror.
510
00:32:18,520 --> 00:32:22,273
May we show our support
to our boys in lraq.
511
00:32:24,651 --> 00:32:29,030
May U .S. and A. kill every single terrorist.
512
00:32:34,077 --> 00:32:36,662
May your George Bush drink the blood
513
00:32:36,747 --> 00:32:40,541
of every single man, woman
and child of lraq.
514
00:32:40,751 --> 00:32:42,001
Yeah !
515
00:32:43,670 --> 00:32:48,090
May you destroy their country
so that for the next thousand years
516
00:32:48,175 --> 00:32:52,178
not even a single lizard
will survive in their desert.
517
00:32:53,555 --> 00:32:55,514
To show our friendship,
518
00:32:55,599 --> 00:32:59,352
l now will sing
our Kazakh national anthem
519
00:32:59,436 --> 00:33:02,146
to the tune of your national anthem.
520
00:33:03,065 --> 00:33:04,565
Please stand.
521
00:33:06,068 --> 00:33:09,737
Kazakhstan is the greatest
522
00:33:09,821 --> 00:33:12,990
Country in the worId
523
00:33:13,075 --> 00:33:16,035
AII other countries
524
00:33:16,119 --> 00:33:19,789
Are run by IittIe girIs
525
00:33:19,873 --> 00:33:22,833
Kazakhstan is number one
526
00:33:22,918 --> 00:33:26,420
Exporter of potassium
527
00:33:26,546 --> 00:33:30,049
Other CentraI Asian countries
528
00:33:30,133 --> 00:33:33,511
Have inferior potassium
529
00:33:33,595 --> 00:33:36,847
Kazakhstan is the greatest
530
00:33:36,932 --> 00:33:39,558
Country in the worId
531
00:33:39,643 --> 00:33:41,936
AII other countries
532
00:33:42,020 --> 00:33:44,563
Is the home of the gays
533
00:33:56,535 --> 00:34:00,037
We nearly died last night.
This journey is cursed.
534
00:34:00,455 --> 00:34:02,415
We should have stayed in New York.
535
00:34:02,666 --> 00:34:04,083
I was sad.
536
00:34:04,167 --> 00:34:06,836
The rodeo peopIes did not Iike me.
537
00:34:06,920 --> 00:34:09,588
What if PameIa did not Iike me too?
538
00:34:09,673 --> 00:34:13,300
We needed something
to change our fortunes.
539
00:34:13,468 --> 00:34:15,344
Look, Azamat, a Gypsy village.
540
00:34:16,388 --> 00:34:19,932
Let us extract some of their tears
so we can remove the curse.
541
00:34:20,308 --> 00:34:24,019
Do not fear me, Gypsy,
all I want from you is your tears.
542
00:34:24,104 --> 00:34:26,939
Please give them to me or I will take them.
543
00:34:27,858 --> 00:34:28,941
l'm not a Gypsy.
544
00:34:29,025 --> 00:34:32,153
l'm a Midwestern
farmer's daughter. Americana.
545
00:34:32,237 --> 00:34:34,989
You have many treasures.
Who did you rob for this?
546
00:34:35,073 --> 00:34:37,533
We didn't rob them.
They came from the house.
547
00:34:37,617 --> 00:34:40,202
l will look in your treasures, Gypsy.
548
00:34:41,246 --> 00:34:43,956
ls this understood? I will look on them.
549
00:34:44,416 --> 00:34:45,750
Please do.
550
00:34:49,004 --> 00:34:51,464
Who is this lady you have shrunk?
551
00:34:51,548 --> 00:34:54,425
Was she the owner of this house
that you camp in front of?
552
00:34:54,509 --> 00:34:56,886
There's a couple more child's dolls.
553
00:34:56,970 --> 00:35:00,556
Do not try and shrink me, Gypsy. I serious.
554
00:35:00,640 --> 00:35:02,725
-These are your spells?
-No.
555
00:35:02,851 --> 00:35:05,728
There's a good one,
The MiIIionaire Mindset.
556
00:35:06,188 --> 00:35:08,481
There you go.
557
00:35:08,565 --> 00:35:10,900
-Baywatch.
-Baywatch?
558
00:35:17,032 --> 00:35:18,824
lt means she love me.
559
00:35:23,038 --> 00:35:24,163
Azamat!
560
00:35:24,539 --> 00:35:26,832
Azamat, great success!
l've got the tears.
561
00:35:26,917 --> 00:35:28,334
Onwards to California!
562
00:35:28,668 --> 00:35:30,127
Let's go.
563
00:35:30,420 --> 00:35:31,462
What's that you've got there?
564
00:35:31,546 --> 00:35:33,631
lt's nothing. Don't worry about it.
565
00:35:47,354 --> 00:35:49,522
Are we going the right way?
566
00:35:49,731 --> 00:35:52,525
-l don't know, this map is from 1917.
-Where the hell are we?
567
00:35:57,322 --> 00:35:59,323
Hey, stop that goddamn van !
568
00:36:00,367 --> 00:36:03,577
Hey, baby, want to go out?
Wanna go out, honey?
569
00:36:07,749 --> 00:36:10,334
l'm going to stop and ask.
570
00:36:10,418 --> 00:36:13,420
No, no, no, keep going. Keep going.
571
00:36:16,591 --> 00:36:18,717
l need the direction to California, please.
572
00:36:18,802 --> 00:36:20,636
-To California?
-You a long way from home.
573
00:36:20,720 --> 00:36:23,264
Who you with, man?
Who you with, who you with?
574
00:36:23,348 --> 00:36:27,852
l travel with my friend, Azamat Bagatov.
We travel across the country.
575
00:36:27,936 --> 00:36:31,730
You can't be talking all that.
You gotta be talking English right here.
576
00:36:31,815 --> 00:36:34,984
You look like Michael Jackson, Beat It.
577
00:36:35,110 --> 00:36:36,944
Man, you better. . .
578
00:36:39,364 --> 00:36:42,908
l like you peoples.
Can you teach me how to dress?
579
00:36:42,993 --> 00:36:44,785
How can I be like you?
580
00:36:44,870 --> 00:36:47,037
You need to let them jeans down.
581
00:36:47,122 --> 00:36:48,372
Pull them down?
582
00:36:48,456 --> 00:36:50,207
Don't pull them down like. . .
583
00:36:50,292 --> 00:36:52,251
-Like a ho?
-No, no, no.
584
00:36:52,335 --> 00:36:54,211
-Like a this?
-Yeah.
585
00:36:54,296 --> 00:36:56,672
But don't show your Huggies though, man.
586
00:36:57,132 --> 00:36:59,174
What the hell? ls that fishnet?
587
00:36:59,259 --> 00:37:02,136
No, no, no, these are my antipants.
588
00:37:02,220 --> 00:37:05,681
-What kind of music you listen to?
-l like very much Corky Bucek.
589
00:37:05,765 --> 00:37:07,308
You know Corky Bucek?
590
00:37:09,019 --> 00:37:10,394
No, no, no.
591
00:37:11,271 --> 00:37:14,231
You got to lick it before you stick it.
592
00:37:15,358 --> 00:37:17,401
Can you teach me speak like you?
593
00:37:17,485 --> 00:37:18,694
What you trying to say?
594
00:37:18,778 --> 00:37:22,114
-How you say, "How do you do?"
-What's up with it?
595
00:37:22,198 --> 00:37:23,991
-What's that with it?
-Yeah.
596
00:37:25,660 --> 00:37:27,828
Pull over and let's see
if we can stay here.
597
00:37:36,129 --> 00:37:38,422
What's up with it, vanilla-face?
598
00:37:38,506 --> 00:37:41,592
Me and my homey, Azamat,
just parked our slab outside.
599
00:37:41,676 --> 00:37:42,760
Please.
600
00:37:42,844 --> 00:37:46,597
We are looking for somewhere to
post up our black asses for the night.
601
00:37:46,681 --> 00:37:49,433
So bang-bang, skeet-skeet, nigga.
602
00:37:50,518 --> 00:37:52,311
We just a couple of pimps, no ho's.
603
00:37:52,395 --> 00:37:54,688
-Sir, you gotta leave.
-Okay.
604
00:37:54,773 --> 00:37:58,108
Leave now or we're gonna call the cops
and we'll have you taken out.
605
00:37:58,193 --> 00:38:02,571
We can't stay here,
they are player haters.
606
00:38:10,288 --> 00:38:13,082
-Hi. Hello.
-You have a room for tonight?
607
00:38:13,166 --> 00:38:15,167
Oh, yes. Yes, definitely.
608
00:38:15,543 --> 00:38:17,378
-Come on in.
-Great.
609
00:38:18,171 --> 00:38:19,797
Your friend also.
610
00:38:22,050 --> 00:38:24,343
A beautiful house, this.
611
00:38:24,427 --> 00:38:27,513
All the paintings in the house, I did.
612
00:38:27,597 --> 00:38:28,847
What is this man?
613
00:38:28,932 --> 00:38:33,852
This is a Yemenite Jew
and he's working on a piece of jewelry.
614
00:38:34,229 --> 00:38:39,066
They, Yemenites, were also jewelers.
615
00:38:39,192 --> 00:38:41,527
Why you have a picture of a Jew?
616
00:38:41,987 --> 00:38:46,907
Because l'm Jewish,
so I have lots of pictures of Jews.
617
00:38:52,706 --> 00:38:55,624
This is the room and. . .
618
00:38:57,502 --> 00:39:01,171
-Do you need two pillows?
-Yes.
619
00:39:01,256 --> 00:39:03,590
Great. Thank you. Lovely place.
620
00:39:06,761 --> 00:39:09,096
-They're Jews.
-l know that now.
621
00:39:09,556 --> 00:39:11,181
They'll kill us.
We need to escape.
622
00:39:25,030 --> 00:39:27,865
-Wait, wait.
-Okay.
623
00:39:29,951 --> 00:39:31,118
Hello.
624
00:39:31,870 --> 00:39:34,246
-How are you?
-Great.
625
00:39:34,330 --> 00:39:35,956
You guys getting settled in?
626
00:39:36,041 --> 00:39:38,709
This is a special sandwich for you.
627
00:39:38,793 --> 00:39:43,422
l not so hungry. He can eat this.
628
00:39:43,506 --> 00:39:44,715
He fat.
629
00:39:45,467 --> 00:39:46,967
No, no.
630
00:39:47,052 --> 00:39:49,053
-You gonna eat, because. . .
-Take a half.
631
00:39:49,137 --> 00:39:51,847
-Take a half and then you'll see.
-Take a half.
632
00:39:51,931 --> 00:39:53,515
Yeah. I not so hungry.
633
00:39:53,600 --> 00:39:55,392
You eat a little bit.
634
00:40:00,190 --> 00:40:03,233
Go ahead and eat something
because you're hungry.
635
00:40:03,318 --> 00:40:04,401
Yes.
636
00:40:12,535 --> 00:40:15,704
l don't want to see you go hungry.
637
00:40:15,789 --> 00:40:18,332
What is this picture over here?
638
00:40:18,750 --> 00:40:20,000
Okay. . .
639
00:40:27,342 --> 00:40:29,426
lt is 3:00 in the morning.
640
00:40:29,511 --> 00:40:32,387
l am in a nest of Jews.
641
00:40:32,472 --> 00:40:35,015
They have cleverly shifted their shapes.
642
00:40:35,100 --> 00:40:39,186
One of them has taken the form
of a little old woman.
643
00:40:40,021 --> 00:40:42,189
You can barely see her horns.
644
00:40:43,608 --> 00:40:46,151
She have tried to poison me already.
645
00:40:46,903 --> 00:40:48,946
These rats are very clever.
646
00:40:56,496 --> 00:40:58,122
Look, the Jews have
shifted their shapes.
647
00:41:00,291 --> 00:41:02,000
OK, OK. How much shall
l give them?
648
00:41:02,335 --> 00:41:04,795
l don't know. . .
649
00:41:06,506 --> 00:41:08,048
More. Give them more.
650
00:41:11,219 --> 00:41:12,719
Go. Go.
651
00:41:27,944 --> 00:41:30,320
Let's go back to New York,
at least there's no Jews there.
652
00:41:30,405 --> 00:41:32,156
Calm down.
We'll keep heading to California.
653
00:41:32,240 --> 00:41:34,116
Why California?
What's so special about California?
654
00:41:34,200 --> 00:41:35,492
We are going to California!
655
00:41:35,577 --> 00:41:36,910
And get killed on the way?
656
00:41:37,495 --> 00:41:41,665
Relax, Azamat!
l will get us protection.
657
00:41:44,127 --> 00:41:47,254
What is the best gun
to defend from a Jew?
658
00:41:50,383 --> 00:41:54,428
l would recommend
either a 9 millimeter or a .45.
659
00:41:57,015 --> 00:41:58,932
Very nice.
660
00:42:00,768 --> 00:42:05,230
lt like I movie star, Dirty Harold.
661
00:42:05,315 --> 00:42:08,066
-Yes, sir.
-Come on and make my day, Jew.
662
00:42:09,986 --> 00:42:14,031
But he wouId not seII me gun
since I not American.
663
00:42:14,115 --> 00:42:16,450
So I Iook for other protection.
664
00:42:17,410 --> 00:42:19,661
MU NCH RANCH
Exotic Animal Dealer
665
00:42:19,746 --> 00:42:23,582
-What type of dog is this?
-This is a tortoise.
666
00:42:23,666 --> 00:42:26,293
ls this a cat in a hat?
667
00:42:26,377 --> 00:42:28,670
No, it's a tortoise in a shell.
668
00:42:28,755 --> 00:42:30,505
Yes.
669
00:42:30,590 --> 00:42:32,966
l need animal for protection.
670
00:42:33,885 --> 00:42:35,260
What you have for me?
671
00:43:00,787 --> 00:43:03,330
We're safe.
Now we continue to California.
672
00:43:04,457 --> 00:43:05,540
High five!
673
00:43:05,625 --> 00:43:07,334
Great! Nice.
674
00:43:22,100 --> 00:43:23,850
Switch it off.
675
00:43:23,935 --> 00:43:25,269
lt so annoying !
676
00:43:41,077 --> 00:43:45,080
Happy times. We were safe
and weII on our way to PameIa.
677
00:43:45,415 --> 00:43:47,708
It was time to get back to work.
678
00:43:49,502 --> 00:43:54,756
Kazakhstan needs to learn
about American fine dining.
679
00:43:55,967 --> 00:43:57,968
First, a lady will
teach you southern manners.
680
00:43:58,177 --> 00:43:59,469
How long have I got?
681
00:43:59,554 --> 00:44:03,557
An hour. Then you have
dinner date with high society.
682
00:44:06,185 --> 00:44:07,853
Hello and nice meet you.
683
00:44:07,937 --> 00:44:10,522
Hello, it's so nice to meet you.
Welcome to America.
684
00:44:10,606 --> 00:44:11,857
KATH lE B. MARTlN
Etiquette Coach
685
00:44:11,941 --> 00:44:16,945
Will you please teach me
how to dine like gentleman?
686
00:44:17,530 --> 00:44:19,573
Of course, I'll be happy to.
687
00:44:22,118 --> 00:44:24,828
Is it poIite to greet peopIe
when I make entry?
688
00:44:24,912 --> 00:44:25,996
TH E MAGNOLlA MANSlON
Dining Society
689
00:44:26,080 --> 00:44:27,414
Yes, it is.
690
00:44:27,498 --> 00:44:30,917
-Let me introduce you around.
-Yes.
691
00:44:31,002 --> 00:44:34,296
-You're gonna have to. . .
-l'm Mike. Mike Jared.
692
00:44:35,673 --> 00:44:37,924
Hello, l'm Bethany Weston.
693
00:44:38,009 --> 00:44:39,259
-Lovely to see you.
-Nice.
694
00:44:39,344 --> 00:44:42,179
-How you do?
-How do you do? My name's Ben.
695
00:44:45,475 --> 00:44:50,604
Should I pay interest in peoples
around the table-sides?
696
00:44:50,938 --> 00:44:52,147
Yes.
697
00:44:52,231 --> 00:44:55,692
And, if it is a big table, a very long table,
698
00:44:55,777 --> 00:44:58,028
you might want to restrict
your conversation. . .
699
00:44:58,112 --> 00:45:01,365
-Yes.
-. . .to people right in your vicinity.
700
00:45:01,449 --> 00:45:03,992
-Very nice.
-So you are not yelling.
701
00:45:08,456 --> 00:45:09,998
What do you do?
702
00:45:10,083 --> 00:45:12,876
-l'm the pastor of a church.
-Yes.
703
00:45:12,960 --> 00:45:16,713
-What do you do?
-l have spent years in construction.
704
00:45:16,798 --> 00:45:20,133
l'm recently retired.
705
00:45:20,218 --> 00:45:22,677
-You are retard?
-Yes.
706
00:45:22,762 --> 00:45:24,930
Physical or mental?
707
00:45:26,182 --> 00:45:29,393
-Retired.
-No, no, not retarded.
708
00:45:29,477 --> 00:45:31,978
-l don't work anymore.
-Stopped working.
709
00:45:32,063 --> 00:45:35,982
lt's very good you allow retard
710
00:45:36,067 --> 00:45:39,903
to eat with you in the same place.
711
00:45:39,987 --> 00:45:43,156
That's not what
we're saying about this man.
712
00:45:43,241 --> 00:45:47,577
He is not what
you would refer to as retard.
713
00:45:48,413 --> 00:45:51,081
-No.
-No, no. Not at all.
714
00:45:51,165 --> 00:45:53,792
Do you have a telephone in this village?
715
00:45:54,168 --> 00:45:55,502
Of course.
716
00:46:02,510 --> 00:46:04,928
Should I show photos of my family?
717
00:46:05,012 --> 00:46:07,848
You have photos
of your family? Wonderful.
718
00:46:09,308 --> 00:46:11,685
This my favorite son, Huey Lewis.
719
00:46:12,311 --> 00:46:14,271
-Okay.
-Yes.
720
00:46:14,355 --> 00:46:16,231
-He looks happy.
-Yes.
721
00:46:18,025 --> 00:46:19,818
He very strong.
722
00:46:19,902 --> 00:46:23,780
-My goodness, is that him holding you?
-Yes. Very strong.
723
00:46:23,865 --> 00:46:28,535
He grow three centimeter.
He now 17 centimeter long.
724
00:46:30,538 --> 00:46:35,417
l'm not sure I would show
these photos of him without clothes on.
725
00:46:35,501 --> 00:46:39,421
Should I pay compliments to the peoples?
726
00:46:39,547 --> 00:46:44,384
Yes, but only if you truly agree
with that compliment.
727
00:46:44,927 --> 00:46:48,513
You have a very gentle face
728
00:46:48,598 --> 00:46:52,767
-and a very erotic physique.
-Thank you.
729
00:46:53,186 --> 00:46:54,728
-You're correct.
-Yes.
730
00:46:54,812 --> 00:46:56,730
That's a very good observation.
731
00:46:56,814 --> 00:46:58,815
She is your wife?
732
00:46:58,900 --> 00:47:00,692
Nope. That's my wife.
733
00:47:00,776 --> 00:47:06,698
ln my country,
they would go crazy for these two.
734
00:47:06,782 --> 00:47:08,200
Not so much.
735
00:47:14,540 --> 00:47:18,084
What should I say if
l need to go to the shit hole?
736
00:47:18,836 --> 00:47:20,879
You mean to the restroom?
737
00:47:20,963 --> 00:47:24,508
-To the place to make the shit.
-The bathroom? Okay. What you. . .
738
00:47:24,592 --> 00:47:26,426
Not to bath. To make dirt from anus.
739
00:47:26,511 --> 00:47:29,387
-Not a bath, right. The toilet.
-The brown. . .
740
00:47:29,472 --> 00:47:32,349
-Where you make. . . You understand?
-Yes. Yes.
741
00:47:32,433 --> 00:47:34,643
-Bad? Bad thing from it.
-Yes.
742
00:47:36,103 --> 00:47:37,187
Brown.
743
00:47:37,271 --> 00:47:41,441
What you do is you say, "Excuse me,
l need to go to the restroom."
744
00:47:42,109 --> 00:47:47,364
Excuse me, is it possible
to go and do a, you know. . .
745
00:47:47,448 --> 00:47:49,950
-To be excused?
-How you say in the, you know. . .
746
00:47:50,034 --> 00:47:52,869
Upstairs. Just say,
"Excuse me a moment."
747
00:47:52,995 --> 00:47:56,665
-l need to go, what you say. . .
-That works. Thank you.
748
00:47:56,749 --> 00:47:59,918
-Can you go upstairs?
-Yes, thank you.
749
00:48:00,002 --> 00:48:05,090
l think that the cultural differences
are vast. . .
750
00:48:05,174 --> 00:48:08,093
-Exactly.
-. . .and I think he's a delightful man
751
00:48:08,177 --> 00:48:14,307
and it wouldn't take very much time
for him to really become Americanized.
752
00:48:14,934 --> 00:48:16,434
Thank you very much. I feel much better.
753
00:48:16,519 --> 00:48:18,728
-Cindy, where shall I put this?
-Just. . .
754
00:48:18,813 --> 00:48:20,897
Where should I put this?
755
00:48:25,027 --> 00:48:27,279
Maybe in the other restroom down here.
756
00:48:27,363 --> 00:48:28,613
ln the. . .
757
00:48:30,032 --> 00:48:33,159
Excuse me. . .
Excuse me for just a moment, please.
758
00:48:33,911 --> 00:48:37,747
You roll off like this
759
00:48:37,832 --> 00:48:41,459
and you wipe your bottom
and you put the paper. . . Look.
760
00:48:41,586 --> 00:48:43,420
-You, wipe mine?
-No, I don't. You do.
761
00:48:43,504 --> 00:48:47,591
-This is a very private thing.
-The host cleans the anus of the other?
762
00:48:47,675 --> 00:48:51,928
No, no, no.
Nobody touches you, except you.
763
00:48:52,513 --> 00:48:54,723
Can I bring a guest to dinner?
764
00:48:55,516 --> 00:48:58,602
lf you have been invited
to a home or to a party. . .
765
00:48:58,686 --> 00:49:02,606
-Yes.
-. . . it is acceptable to bring a guest
766
00:49:02,690 --> 00:49:05,734
-if you ask your host in advance.
-Yes.
767
00:49:05,818 --> 00:49:07,944
General Stonewall Jackson, Robert E. Lee.
768
00:49:08,029 --> 00:49:12,782
-l think this my friend. Hello?
-Hi, l'm looking for Borat.
769
00:49:12,867 --> 00:49:15,035
-Yes, it's me.
-Oh, hi, honey.
770
00:49:15,202 --> 00:49:18,455
-l'm Luenell. Hi, hi.
-Hello, nice to meet you.
771
00:49:18,539 --> 00:49:20,749
-This my friend, Luenell.
-Hi.
772
00:49:21,417 --> 00:49:23,627
Oh, okay. . .
773
00:49:25,880 --> 00:49:27,631
You all having a dinner party.
774
00:49:27,715 --> 00:49:31,509
Well, we were. I don't know exactly
what all that we're doing. . .
775
00:49:31,594 --> 00:49:35,597
-lt is getting very, very late.
-Excuse me, l'm going to have to go.
776
00:49:35,681 --> 00:49:38,391
-Okay. Very nice.
-lt's getting very, very late
777
00:49:38,476 --> 00:49:41,645
and it's time that, you know,
778
00:49:41,729 --> 00:49:45,315
we were ending
our dinner party and everything.
779
00:49:45,399 --> 00:49:48,318
-l apologize. . .
-But can't she come for desserts?
780
00:49:48,402 --> 00:49:50,904
Absolutely not, and neither can you.
781
00:49:50,988 --> 00:49:53,239
-The sheriff is on his way.
-l hope so.
782
00:49:53,324 --> 00:49:55,075
l've already called them.
783
00:49:55,159 --> 00:49:58,203
Why you call police?
Have the retard escaped?
784
00:50:01,624 --> 00:50:05,210
l want say I very sorry
how they treat you in this house.
785
00:50:05,503 --> 00:50:06,836
Thank you.
786
00:50:07,421 --> 00:50:10,590
l was thinking
maybe l'd just take the night off.
787
00:50:11,008 --> 00:50:12,842
Why don't we just go out
and have some fun?
788
00:50:12,927 --> 00:50:15,136
What do you think about that?
789
00:50:15,262 --> 00:50:17,389
You want to come with us?
790
00:50:17,473 --> 00:50:18,723
Up yours!
791
00:50:29,819 --> 00:50:31,736
Hi ! My name Borat.
792
00:50:32,363 --> 00:50:34,280
-This my friend, Luenell.
-Hi, Luenell.
793
00:50:34,365 --> 00:50:36,366
She is a prostitute.
794
00:50:54,802 --> 00:50:56,845
You were funny on that bull.
795
00:50:56,929 --> 00:50:59,889
Everybody almost see your underpants.
796
00:50:59,974 --> 00:51:02,100
l never rode a bull before.
797
00:51:06,147 --> 00:51:10,066
Well, you wanna. . .
You wanna come in for a little while?
798
00:51:10,151 --> 00:51:13,236
l would like very much
799
00:51:13,320 --> 00:51:16,406
but I in love with a woman in Malibu.
800
00:51:16,490 --> 00:51:19,117
lt would not be nice to her for me to. . .
801
00:51:19,201 --> 00:51:23,830
Okay, well, if you're ever in town again,
this way, you know, look me up.
802
00:51:24,790 --> 00:51:27,208
lf I ever in town again, Luenell,
803
00:51:27,293 --> 00:51:29,961
l would very much like to pay you for sex.
804
00:51:30,045 --> 00:51:31,171
Okay.
805
00:51:32,590 --> 00:51:34,215
Good night, Luenells.
806
00:51:34,300 --> 00:51:35,967
Good night, Borat.
807
00:51:44,143 --> 00:51:47,187
You say my name right. Borat.
808
00:51:47,271 --> 00:51:49,981
People say Borak or Billy or Bob.
809
00:51:51,650 --> 00:51:52,734
Bye.
810
00:52:04,413 --> 00:52:09,667
"Pamela is a fairly simple girl,
she recently explained.
811
00:52:10,294 --> 00:52:14,798
"'There's not a whole lot of logic
in the way I live my life.
812
00:52:14,882 --> 00:52:16,883
"'l am very spontaneous."'
813
00:52:17,885 --> 00:52:19,677
l'm very spontaneous too.
814
00:52:39,824 --> 00:52:42,450
I needed a gift to give to PameIa
815
00:52:42,535 --> 00:52:45,912
so that she wouId grant me
entry into her vagina.
816
00:52:46,455 --> 00:52:51,876
Therefore, I convinced Azamat to Iet me
fiIm a report in an American store.
817
00:52:53,629 --> 00:52:56,923
Don't spend more than $3.
We're low on money.
818
00:52:58,425 --> 00:53:00,677
This your shops?
819
00:53:00,761 --> 00:53:02,804
Right, this is my antique shop.
820
00:53:02,888 --> 00:53:05,932
Why do you have
so many things with a flag?
821
00:53:06,016 --> 00:53:08,142
We're honoring our heritage.
822
00:53:08,519 --> 00:53:12,188
Now, what in here? What is this?
823
00:53:12,273 --> 00:53:14,148
These are a number of collectibles.
824
00:53:14,233 --> 00:53:17,902
l mean, this is a lamp that, you know,
you would use in your home.
825
00:53:17,987 --> 00:53:21,573
This is a Chinese cloisonné bell.
826
00:53:21,657 --> 00:53:25,577
And this is a little decorative duck.
827
00:53:25,661 --> 00:53:28,746
And do you think, you know, when they. . .
828
00:53:32,960 --> 00:53:34,794
l'm sorry. Wait, wait, wait.
829
00:53:39,717 --> 00:53:41,885
-We need help, baby.
-No, it's okay.
830
00:53:45,222 --> 00:53:46,472
l sorry.
831
00:53:50,686 --> 00:53:53,479
Sorry. I will repair all of this.
832
00:53:54,148 --> 00:53:58,735
Don't worry.
My friend, he can make glue and. . .
833
00:53:58,819 --> 00:54:02,238
l don't think you're gonna be able to glue
it. You're gonna have to pay for it.
834
00:54:02,323 --> 00:54:05,241
Okay, I have a digital watch
from the future.
835
00:54:05,326 --> 00:54:08,202
l will give you.
ls worth more than all of this.
836
00:54:08,287 --> 00:54:10,914
You broke $425 worth of stuff.
837
00:54:11,290 --> 00:54:14,876
160, 170, 180.
838
00:54:16,170 --> 00:54:18,880
-That's not enough.
-Do you want hair. . .
839
00:54:18,964 --> 00:54:20,757
No, I don't want any damn hair.
840
00:54:20,841 --> 00:54:23,134
This is best hair in Kazakhstan.
Feel the quality.
841
00:54:23,218 --> 00:54:24,761
l don't want your damn hair.
842
00:54:24,845 --> 00:54:28,431
This is hair from pubis.
l can get 2,000 bags by next Friday.
843
00:54:28,515 --> 00:54:31,100
We don't use that stuff in this country.
844
00:54:31,393 --> 00:54:32,977
Have you offered them pubic hair?
845
00:54:33,062 --> 00:54:34,771
Yes!
846
00:54:34,855 --> 00:54:36,856
Just give me another 20.
847
00:54:37,274 --> 00:54:38,274
lt was a mistake.
848
00:54:38,359 --> 00:54:39,567
You screwed up again.
849
00:54:39,652 --> 00:54:40,902
l didn't see the truck.
850
00:54:40,986 --> 00:54:43,112
-l slipped on it and that was it.
-Only an idiot could do this.
851
00:54:43,197 --> 00:54:47,450
Would you have believed this
if I had told you? All right. Go. Go. Go.
852
00:54:53,040 --> 00:54:55,541
You've ruined this documentary
and almost bankrupt us.
853
00:54:55,626 --> 00:54:58,127
So call the ministry
and get more money.
854
00:54:58,212 --> 00:55:01,297
What? lf I did that,
they would kill us!
855
00:55:02,049 --> 00:55:06,344
California had better be as good
as you say, or we're finished.
856
00:55:27,491 --> 00:55:28,658
You bastard.
857
00:55:29,868 --> 00:55:31,160
What's the matter with you?
858
00:55:31,245 --> 00:55:34,414
How dare you make
hand-party over Pamela.
859
00:55:34,498 --> 00:55:37,041
Why do you care who l
pleasure myself to?
860
00:55:37,126 --> 00:55:39,043
Because I love this woman.
861
00:55:39,128 --> 00:55:42,296
She's the reason
we travel to California!
862
00:55:42,381 --> 00:55:44,215
What?
You lied to me!
863
00:55:44,299 --> 00:55:46,175
You lied about California!
864
00:56:42,733 --> 00:56:45,985
Eat my asshole!
865
00:57:18,352 --> 00:57:20,061
Holy. . .
866
00:57:21,230 --> 00:57:22,355
Okay.
867
00:57:47,548 --> 00:57:49,674
We have a special guest here this evening.
Ruth Feiner is here.
868
00:57:49,758 --> 00:57:51,259
MORTGAGE BROKERS
ANNUAL BANQUET
869
00:58:17,286 --> 00:58:19,328
Get the fuck out of here!
870
00:58:29,423 --> 00:58:32,049
So bad news.
871
00:58:33,093 --> 00:58:35,595
Azamat have leave.
872
00:58:37,097 --> 00:58:39,599
l wake up, he disappear
873
00:58:39,683 --> 00:58:44,437
and he take Oxana, my bear.
874
00:58:44,980 --> 00:58:46,272
Our bear.
875
00:58:47,274 --> 00:58:50,109
And he also decide to take all money
876
00:58:50,194 --> 00:58:52,445
and also my passport.
877
00:58:56,241 --> 00:59:01,370
And he leave me
878
00:59:01,455 --> 00:59:05,291
only this bag, with a hen
879
00:59:07,794 --> 00:59:14,300
and ticket to Kazakhstan.
880
00:59:15,552 --> 00:59:17,136
But no passport.
881
00:59:19,348 --> 00:59:23,017
But at least he is
882
00:59:23,101 --> 00:59:25,645
man enough to leave me
883
00:59:32,152 --> 00:59:33,778
my beautiful.
884
00:59:35,739 --> 00:59:39,825
Which I have cleaned since last night.
885
00:59:43,330 --> 00:59:47,458
And I have decide to
886
00:59:47,542 --> 00:59:49,835
continue making documentary.
887
00:59:50,837 --> 00:59:53,589
Make it without Azamat.
888
00:59:53,674 --> 00:59:55,424
l think it will be better
889
00:59:55,509 --> 00:59:58,970
and we will have more success
without him.
890
01:00:35,132 --> 01:00:38,175
l only want 17 cents, please.
891
01:01:03,493 --> 01:01:07,496
I had no car, no money and no Azamat.
892
01:01:07,581 --> 01:01:09,540
The onIy thing keep me going
893
01:01:09,624 --> 01:01:13,586
was my dream of one day
hoIding PameIa in my arms
894
01:01:13,670 --> 01:01:16,964
and then making romance expIosion
on her stomach.
895
01:01:24,931 --> 01:01:29,310
EventuaIIy, I managed to hike a hitchings
with group of young schoIars
896
01:01:29,394 --> 01:01:31,645
aIso traveIing across country.
897
01:01:32,773 --> 01:01:34,690
FRATERNlTY BROTHERS
Univ. of S. Carolina
898
01:01:34,775 --> 01:01:38,027
-How you doing? How you doing?
-Where the fuck are you from, baby?
899
01:01:38,111 --> 01:01:39,612
l am from Kazakhstan.
900
01:01:40,113 --> 01:01:42,656
-Welcome to fucking America!
-Hey, have a seat. Let's go.
901
01:01:42,741 --> 01:01:45,368
-What's your name?
-Anthony.
902
01:01:45,452 --> 01:01:46,869
-Anthony?
-Yes.
903
01:01:46,953 --> 01:01:48,704
-Anthony.
-And Justin.
904
01:01:48,789 --> 01:01:51,707
-Justin.
-And David.
905
01:01:51,792 --> 01:01:53,167
-David.
-Bartender Dave.
906
01:01:53,251 --> 01:01:54,710
Very nice.
907
01:01:54,795 --> 01:01:57,380
-Can you open this, please?
-Oh, sure.
908
01:01:59,341 --> 01:02:01,675
Thank you very much.
909
01:02:01,760 --> 01:02:05,888
So you like the bitches out there
in the fucking old Russia, there?
910
01:02:06,139 --> 01:02:07,723
-What?
-The bitches in old Russia.
911
01:02:07,808 --> 01:02:09,475
How are the women?
912
01:02:09,559 --> 01:02:12,686
The fucking ho's, baby! The fucking girls!
913
01:02:12,771 --> 01:02:14,563
-You fuck the shit out of them !
-Yes!
914
01:02:14,648 --> 01:02:16,023
Then you never call them again.
915
01:02:16,108 --> 01:02:19,819
Why you don't call them? Because
they do not have a telephone, yes?
916
01:02:19,903 --> 01:02:21,362
No, not because of that.
917
01:02:21,446 --> 01:02:24,031
They don't have my respect, you know?
l mean. . .
918
01:02:24,116 --> 01:02:26,784
So, what are you doing here in America?
919
01:02:26,868 --> 01:02:31,622
They film me travel across U.S. and A.
920
01:02:31,706 --> 01:02:35,209
l don't know what you're saying, man,
but that's cool !
921
01:02:35,293 --> 01:02:36,919
Let's get drunk!
922
01:02:37,504 --> 01:02:39,296
-Yes! High five!
-High five!
923
01:02:43,635 --> 01:02:45,719
This is America in a bottle.
924
01:02:47,264 --> 01:02:51,016
-Oh, baby!
-Oh, baby!
925
01:02:51,101 --> 01:02:53,936
-Borat, let me hear it. Oh, baby!
-Oh, the baby!
926
01:02:54,020 --> 01:02:56,021
Suck, suck, suck!
927
01:03:01,695 --> 01:03:03,612
Let me tell you game we play.
928
01:03:03,697 --> 01:03:05,281
Can I hear a game you play?
929
01:03:05,365 --> 01:03:09,076
We play a game called
"When the snake eat the pig."
930
01:03:09,161 --> 01:03:12,163
-When the snake eat the huh?
-The snake eat the pig.
931
01:03:12,247 --> 01:03:15,541
-You get a baby mouse, very small. . .
-Baby mouse?
932
01:03:15,625 --> 01:03:22,256
. . .and you put a bit of cheese
in hole of your chram, until it go inside.
933
01:03:22,340 --> 01:03:23,757
That is too crazy for me.
934
01:03:23,842 --> 01:03:26,594
l'll do it. I don't give a fuck, I'll do it.
935
01:03:26,678 --> 01:03:28,888
Let me ask you this.
936
01:03:30,056 --> 01:03:33,184
Are woman. . .
Are women your slaves in Russia?
937
01:03:33,727 --> 01:03:35,895
No. Do you have slaves here?
938
01:03:35,979 --> 01:03:37,730
-We wish. We wish.
-No slaves.
939
01:03:37,814 --> 01:03:40,024
-lt is a shame.
-Hey, Borat.
940
01:03:40,108 --> 01:03:41,192
Big shame. Big shame.
941
01:03:41,276 --> 01:03:42,776
lt would be better country if. . .
942
01:03:42,861 --> 01:03:45,696
Yes, it'd be better country.
We should have slaves.
943
01:03:45,780 --> 01:03:49,033
Our country, the minorities
actually have more power.
944
01:03:49,117 --> 01:03:53,704
Anyone that is minority
has the upper hand.
945
01:03:53,788 --> 01:03:58,042
We have the Jews. We have anybody
that's against the mainstream.
946
01:03:58,126 --> 01:04:01,003
-Do you want to see my new wife?
-Yes!
947
01:04:01,087 --> 01:04:02,796
This my new wife.
948
01:04:03,965 --> 01:04:05,883
-Pamela!
-You know her?
949
01:04:05,967 --> 01:04:07,593
Pamela! I know of Pamela.
950
01:04:07,677 --> 01:04:10,137
l will take her virgin for the first time.
951
01:04:10,222 --> 01:04:12,973
-l am going to put this shit on.
-Put it on.
952
01:04:13,058 --> 01:04:15,226
Borat, Borat. We have a lot to talk about.
953
01:04:15,310 --> 01:04:17,436
l will take her virgin. I will uncork her.
954
01:04:17,521 --> 01:04:20,648
Borat, Borat. She is no virgin, Borat.
955
01:04:20,732 --> 01:04:22,733
-ls not true.
-She is no virgin, buddy.
956
01:04:22,817 --> 01:04:26,153
ls not true. Liar!
Liar, liar, your panties on fire.
957
01:04:26,238 --> 01:04:27,780
Borat, shut up.
958
01:04:28,782 --> 01:04:31,992
SmaII Jacuzzi on a fucking smaII yacht.
959
01:04:32,077 --> 01:04:33,452
What she do?
960
01:04:34,454 --> 01:04:37,039
-She's sucking some dick, man.
-You see her sucking dick?
961
01:04:37,123 --> 01:04:38,415
This is not her.
962
01:04:38,500 --> 01:04:42,545
l guarantee you that shit's gonna happen.
Don't worry about it.
963
01:04:42,629 --> 01:04:45,589
-That's her, Borat. Sorry.
-Borat, that's her.
964
01:04:45,674 --> 01:04:47,174
This is not her.
965
01:04:47,259 --> 01:04:48,884
lt's her. l'm sorry.
966
01:04:48,969 --> 01:04:51,220
-l'm sure it's her.
-l go.
967
01:04:51,304 --> 01:04:53,222
-No, no, no.
-Titty bar.
968
01:04:53,306 --> 01:04:55,099
Come here.
969
01:04:55,183 --> 01:04:56,934
You're my man. You're my man.
970
01:04:57,018 --> 01:04:59,687
l do not know why she is trying to do this.
971
01:04:59,771 --> 01:05:01,605
Come on, Borat. Stay with us, buddy.
972
01:05:01,690 --> 01:05:05,276
We love you. We'll remember you always.
Like I taught you.
973
01:05:05,360 --> 01:05:08,028
Wait. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hey, hey.
974
01:05:08,113 --> 01:05:10,656
You're in America now. You'll make it.
975
01:05:10,740 --> 01:05:12,408
You. . . You keep going, okay?
976
01:05:12,492 --> 01:05:15,452
You are bigger than a woman.
You are better than a woman.
977
01:05:15,537 --> 01:05:16,912
We will always be behind you.
978
01:05:16,997 --> 01:05:20,291
-Do not let a woman ever, ever. . .
-We'll always be. . .
979
01:05:21,334 --> 01:05:23,002
. . .make you who you are.
980
01:05:23,086 --> 01:05:25,004
-Goodbye, my friends.
-Goodbye.
981
01:06:04,919 --> 01:06:06,253
My ticket.
982
01:06:11,217 --> 01:06:14,219
How will I get home?
983
01:06:23,563 --> 01:06:25,272
l sorry, my friend.
984
01:06:34,949 --> 01:06:38,077
Go.
985
01:06:39,954 --> 01:06:41,497
Run to freedom.
986
01:06:42,457 --> 01:06:45,125
Go! Go and live your life!
987
01:07:36,428 --> 01:07:37,761
Come on !
988
01:07:39,931 --> 01:07:42,057
lt is good to be here.
989
01:07:42,142 --> 01:07:43,517
CHARLES "CHlP" PlCKERlNG
U.S. Congressman
990
01:07:43,601 --> 01:07:47,479
This is my 10th Pentecostal camp meeting.
A decade.
991
01:07:48,565 --> 01:07:51,650
The bottom line is,
we're a Christian nation now,
992
01:07:51,735 --> 01:07:52,901
JlM SMlTH
Chief Justice, State Supreme Court
993
01:07:52,986 --> 01:07:54,903
we were one in the beginning
994
01:07:54,988 --> 01:07:59,450
and we gonna always be a Christian
nation until the good Lord returns. Amen.
995
01:08:01,578 --> 01:08:04,455
l didn't evolve out of a monkey.
996
01:08:04,539 --> 01:08:07,750
l didn't use to be a tadpole. I is what I is.
997
01:08:07,834 --> 01:08:09,418
Praise you, Jesus.
998
01:08:09,502 --> 01:08:13,589
The Bible says that God
was manifest in the flesh
999
01:08:13,673 --> 01:08:15,716
and believed on in the world.
1000
01:08:15,800 --> 01:08:19,845
l got good news. Jesus is God in the flesh.
1001
01:08:26,853 --> 01:08:30,147
l don't care what the devil's done to you
or what he's trying to do.
1002
01:08:30,231 --> 01:08:32,816
All you gotta do
is step out of that aisle now
1003
01:08:32,901 --> 01:08:34,943
and make your way down to this altar.
1004
01:08:35,028 --> 01:08:37,362
Let's have a little
old-time church right now.
1005
01:08:37,447 --> 01:08:40,574
l need somebody to
pray with me right now. Come on, sir!
1006
01:08:40,658 --> 01:08:44,453
The blood over my neighbor.
l bleed the blood over my church.
1007
01:08:47,290 --> 01:08:50,209
l want you to help me, save me, please.
1008
01:08:50,293 --> 01:08:52,586
Ladies and gentlemen, the gentleman here,
1009
01:08:52,670 --> 01:08:55,130
standing right next to me,
his name is Bolak.
1010
01:08:55,215 --> 01:08:59,551
Would you greet him with a great big
Jesus name for just a couple of minutes?
1011
01:08:59,636 --> 01:09:01,011
Thank you.
1012
01:09:02,305 --> 01:09:04,181
l have no friends.
1013
01:09:04,265 --> 01:09:06,308
l am alone in this country.
1014
01:09:06,392 --> 01:09:07,935
Nobody like me.
1015
01:09:08,061 --> 01:09:10,103
My only friend, Azamat,
1016
01:09:10,188 --> 01:09:14,024
he take my money and my bear
and he leave me alone.
1017
01:09:14,108 --> 01:09:15,567
Not only this.
1018
01:09:15,652 --> 01:09:19,863
The woman I love,
the reason I travel across the country,
1019
01:09:19,948 --> 01:09:23,492
she have do something terrible on a boat,
1020
01:09:23,576 --> 01:09:26,537
-and now I can never forgive her.
-You have to.
1021
01:09:26,621 --> 01:09:29,790
ls there anybody who can help me?
1022
01:09:29,874 --> 01:09:33,126
Yes. The one that can help you
is who we preached about tonight.
1023
01:09:33,211 --> 01:09:35,963
-Jesus.
-Do Jesus like me?
1024
01:09:36,089 --> 01:09:38,632
Absolutely, Jesus loves you.
1025
01:09:38,716 --> 01:09:42,177
Do Jesus like my sons?
1026
01:09:42,262 --> 01:09:43,554
Jesus loves your sons.
1027
01:09:43,638 --> 01:09:46,473
Do Jesus love my retard brother, Bilo?
1028
01:09:46,558 --> 01:09:48,016
He loves your brother, Bilo.
1029
01:09:48,101 --> 01:09:52,271
Do Jesus love my neighbor,
Nursultan Tulyakbay?
1030
01:09:52,355 --> 01:09:53,856
Yes. He loves everybody.
1031
01:09:53,940 --> 01:09:56,859
Nobody love my neighbor,
Nursultan Tulyakbay.
1032
01:09:58,778 --> 01:10:01,780
Can Jesus heal the pain
that is in my heart?
1033
01:10:02,365 --> 01:10:05,033
Jesus can heal your pain in your heart.
1034
01:10:05,118 --> 01:10:08,120
Make him heal the pain that is in my heart.
1035
01:10:08,204 --> 01:10:11,164
-Lift your hands and begin to worship.
-Lift your hands.
1036
01:10:11,249 --> 01:10:15,002
Would you lift your hands with him
as we pray in the name of Jesus.
1037
01:10:15,086 --> 01:10:16,879
-God, forgive me of my sins.
-God, forgive me. . .
1038
01:10:16,963 --> 01:10:19,423
-Forgive me, God. Cleanse me.
-Cleanse me.
1039
01:10:19,507 --> 01:10:21,884
Cleanse me, Lord, in the name of Jesus.
1040
01:10:23,803 --> 01:10:25,929
Yeah, let that tongue go. Here it comes.
1041
01:10:26,014 --> 01:10:28,557
We're gonna speak in other tongues.
1042
01:10:28,641 --> 01:10:30,475
Let that tongue go.
1043
01:10:31,603 --> 01:10:33,812
Yes, God. Yes, God. Yes, God.
1044
01:10:38,067 --> 01:10:40,652
Yes! Yes!
1045
01:11:00,423 --> 01:11:03,300
l will forgive Pamela
and I will go to California.
1046
01:11:03,384 --> 01:11:06,261
l will go to Malibu with me
and my friend, Mr. Jesus
1047
01:11:06,346 --> 01:11:08,180
and together we will take her!
1048
01:11:14,812 --> 01:11:19,149
I took a bus to Los AngeIes
with some friends of Mr. Jesus.
1049
01:11:19,734 --> 01:11:21,693
FinaIIy, I had arrived.
1050
01:11:23,279 --> 01:11:24,780
Happy times.
1051
01:11:48,012 --> 01:11:49,221
Marilyn.
1052
01:11:50,056 --> 01:11:51,223
Azamat?
1053
01:11:51,683 --> 01:11:53,308
You traitor!
1054
01:11:53,393 --> 01:11:54,559
Look, I can explain.
1055
01:11:54,644 --> 01:11:57,646
You attack me.
My mustache still taste of your testes!
1056
01:11:57,730 --> 01:11:58,981
Calm down.
Let me explain.
1057
01:11:59,065 --> 01:12:00,691
What did you do with the bear?
1058
01:12:00,775 --> 01:12:03,402
She ran off. l'm sorry, l'm sorry.
1059
01:12:03,611 --> 01:12:05,904
Hey! Fuck off, Death !
1060
01:12:06,072 --> 01:12:07,656
You need to calm yourself!
1061
01:12:07,740 --> 01:12:09,408
You have to calm down !
1062
01:12:13,413 --> 01:12:16,707
Well, that's another fine
mess you've gotten me into.
1063
01:12:19,669 --> 01:12:23,839
I had not come to HoIIywood
to fight a man dressed as HitIer.
1064
01:12:25,049 --> 01:12:28,260
I had come to make
PameIa Andersons my wife.
1065
01:12:29,262 --> 01:12:31,054
So I forgave Azamat.
1066
01:12:31,764 --> 01:12:35,100
l knew you'd make it here, Borat.
1067
01:12:35,727 --> 01:12:38,854
l felt so bad that I prepare this for you.
1068
01:12:41,607 --> 01:12:44,943
lt's everything I could find on Pamela.
1069
01:12:45,611 --> 01:12:51,783
Last Friday she appeared for a group
who are against cruelty to animals.
1070
01:12:52,452 --> 01:12:54,119
Against cruelty to animals?
1071
01:13:01,461 --> 01:13:04,379
And tomorrow she's doing a signing.
1072
01:13:05,214 --> 01:13:06,798
She wrote a book.
1073
01:13:10,470 --> 01:13:12,596
What? A woman has written a book?
1074
01:13:14,474 --> 01:13:15,599
Dr. Yamak would never believe this.
1075
01:13:15,683 --> 01:13:16,725
l know.
1076
01:13:19,812 --> 01:13:21,938
We will go to this historical event,
1077
01:13:22,023 --> 01:13:23,815
and I will marry Pamela there. . .
1078
01:13:24,150 --> 01:13:27,235
. . .but in the traditional Kazakhi way.
1079
01:13:28,488 --> 01:13:30,822
Azamat, let's prepare the
wedding sack.
1080
01:13:32,158 --> 01:13:34,284
You forgive me, yes?
1081
01:13:35,787 --> 01:13:36,953
Yes.
1082
01:13:49,842 --> 01:13:52,844
Having learned many lessons
from U.S. and A,
1083
01:13:52,929 --> 01:13:56,890
l will now teach America
how to have a wedding Kazakhi-style.
1084
01:13:57,892 --> 01:13:59,851
You find more.
1085
01:14:07,401 --> 01:14:10,529
PAMELA ANDERSON
AUTOGRAPH SlGNlNG Orange, CA
1086
01:14:19,872 --> 01:14:22,624
Very excite. Very excite.
1087
01:14:37,682 --> 01:14:40,183
Hi. Hi, everyone.
1088
01:14:41,853 --> 01:14:43,895
l love you.
1089
01:14:43,980 --> 01:14:45,564
lt is me, Borat.
1090
01:14:46,065 --> 01:14:49,442
-Well, thanks for coming, you guys.
-Thank you !
1091
01:14:56,033 --> 01:14:57,826
l love Pamela Anderson.
1092
01:14:57,910 --> 01:14:59,369
-Really?
-Yes.
1093
01:15:04,750 --> 01:15:06,001
Go ahead.
1094
01:15:06,794 --> 01:15:08,170
-Hi.
-Hello.
1095
01:15:08,254 --> 01:15:09,504
Make it out to someone?
1096
01:15:09,589 --> 01:15:11,464
My name Borat Sagdiyev.
1097
01:15:11,549 --> 01:15:14,176
l son of Asimbala Sagdiyev,
1098
01:15:14,260 --> 01:15:16,678
and Boltak, the rapist.
1099
01:15:16,762 --> 01:15:19,556
l former husband of Oxana Sagdiyev
1100
01:15:19,640 --> 01:15:21,433
who was daughter of Miriam Tulyakbay
1101
01:15:21,517 --> 01:15:23,560
and Boltak, the rapist.
1102
01:15:25,062 --> 01:15:28,523
l make this for you, this. . .
1103
01:15:28,608 --> 01:15:30,525
There are our name.
1104
01:15:30,610 --> 01:15:35,322
My name. . . Your name,
Pamela Anderson and Borat Sagdiyev.
1105
01:15:35,406 --> 01:15:37,032
Here's today's date.
1106
01:15:37,116 --> 01:15:41,411
And this say that it is today's date,
our wedding,
1107
01:15:41,495 --> 01:15:43,622
and then this inside is silk.
1108
01:15:43,706 --> 01:15:46,374
Pamela, will you marry me?
1109
01:15:46,459 --> 01:15:48,210
No, thanks. l'm sorry.
1110
01:15:48,294 --> 01:15:49,961
No. Agreement not necessary.
1111
01:15:53,007 --> 01:15:55,300
Oh, my God ! Oh, my God !
1112
01:16:00,890 --> 01:16:02,307
Get off!
1113
01:16:03,517 --> 01:16:06,561
-Get your own wife!
-Fucking shit!
1114
01:16:06,646 --> 01:16:08,647
Come on, get her!
1115
01:16:08,731 --> 01:16:10,690
Wait, Pamela.
1116
01:16:10,775 --> 01:16:13,401
Don't worry, I nervous too!
1117
01:16:13,486 --> 01:16:15,278
Pamela, wait.
1118
01:16:15,363 --> 01:16:17,322
Pamela, I will give you your own plow.
1119
01:16:17,406 --> 01:16:20,492
Get out of the way! Watch out, watch out.
1120
01:16:25,915 --> 01:16:29,125
-Get on the ground.
-Hands behind your back.
1121
01:16:29,210 --> 01:16:31,461
-Okay. Pamela. . .
-We're gonna stand you up.
1122
01:16:31,545 --> 01:16:34,339
-Bring your knees up.
-All right.
1123
01:16:36,259 --> 01:16:39,970
Pamela, I am not attracted
to you anymore!
1124
01:16:41,639 --> 01:16:42,681
Not!
1125
01:16:51,190 --> 01:16:53,108
I was humiIiated.
1126
01:16:53,192 --> 01:16:55,944
It was time for me to return to New York,
1127
01:16:56,028 --> 01:16:59,531
where a ticket was waiting for me
to fIy back home.
1128
01:17:00,366 --> 01:17:05,537
WhiIe I sat on the bus, I thought of
my journey over the past three weeks.
1129
01:17:06,122 --> 01:17:08,123
The great times.
1130
01:17:08,207 --> 01:17:10,542
The good times.
1131
01:17:10,626 --> 01:17:13,003
And the shit times.
1132
01:17:13,087 --> 01:17:15,964
MainIy, they were shit times.
1133
01:17:16,048 --> 01:17:20,302
I had come to America
to Iearn Iessons for Kazakhstan
1134
01:17:20,386 --> 01:17:22,387
but what had I Iearned?
1135
01:17:24,682 --> 01:17:26,725
SuddenIy, I reaIized.
1136
01:17:30,229 --> 01:17:33,732
I had Iearned that if you chase a dream,
1137
01:17:33,816 --> 01:17:36,901
especiaIIy one with pIastic chests,
1138
01:17:36,986 --> 01:17:40,780
you can miss the reaI beauty
in front of your eyes.
1139
01:17:46,787 --> 01:17:47,829
Hi.
1140
01:17:49,790 --> 01:17:52,751
8 MONTHS LATER
1141
01:17:55,087 --> 01:17:58,006
Welcome back in my town of Kuzcek.
1142
01:17:58,090 --> 01:18:02,260
Since I return,
there have been much improvements.
1143
01:18:02,345 --> 01:18:05,055
We no longer have Running of the Jew.
1144
01:18:05,139 --> 01:18:08,099
lt's cruel. We Christians now.
1145
01:18:13,064 --> 01:18:14,856
Doltan improve too.
1146
01:18:14,940 --> 01:18:17,067
Hey, Doltan. High five!
1147
01:18:18,986 --> 01:18:20,445
Great.
1148
01:18:20,529 --> 01:18:22,072
Come my house.
1149
01:18:25,159 --> 01:18:27,744
There Nursultan Tulyakbay.
1150
01:18:27,828 --> 01:18:29,871
He still asshole.
1151
01:18:29,955 --> 01:18:31,539
l get iPod.
1152
01:18:31,624 --> 01:18:33,625
He only get iPod Mini.
1153
01:18:33,709 --> 01:18:35,835
Everybody know it for girls.
1154
01:18:36,337 --> 01:18:37,629
Come.
1155
01:18:40,174 --> 01:18:43,134
And this my beautiful wife.
1156
01:18:45,554 --> 01:18:47,597
Thank you for watch my film.
1157
01:18:47,681 --> 01:18:49,516
l hope you like.
1158
01:23:45,020 --> 01:23:46,020
English - US
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