All language subtitles for Ladies Of The Law s01e04 Baby Fever.eng

(Heavy thudding)

(Gentle ringing)

(Cars humming)

- Trixie, really?

(Groaning)

You know, there's
this place where you go

where you get your
hands and your feet done.

It's called a spa.

- Well in Chicago,
we didn't go to the spa.

We stayed at home
and did it ourselves.

You guys got all these little
fancy, smancy spots in la.

Ain't about that life.

- Well, honey, look, we
aint' in Chicago no more,

we in inglewood, okay?

Places our here
they're different.

- Yeah I know, they start
speakin' that other language.

You got watch for
them cues though,

them cues, honey, they'll
tell you if your are bad.

You know, they
start talking that.

Oh you have boyfriend?

You have boyfriend?

- Mhm, mhm.

Yeah the facial
expression never changes.

- Fresh coffee, I
smell fresh coffee.

- Yes.

- [Trixie] Fresh air.

- Coffee.

Nectar from the gods.

I mean, the break room.

Pure heaven, I mean if god
had created anything better

he kept it for himself.

(Playful music)

♪ in to the money, everyday
break case by case ♪

♪ we work hard

♪ slipping for information,
litigation, this is the place ♪

♪ place

♪ we work hard

(rhythmic music)

(Gavel thudding)

- I heard you guys
talking about a spa?

Are we having a spa day?

- If you consider the break
room Trixie's spa, yes.

- Well being at the overtime pay

has not hit my paycheck yet.

I am therefore required
to do this myself

and besides I make
broke look beautiful.

- Uh huh.
- Speaking of paycheck,

I was at lady Lee salon in weho

and there were
some crenshaw types

and they walked out of
the salon without payment,

I think we have a case.

- Oh my gosh, did you
get the information?

- Oh you know I did.

Do you have
magenta, I would love...

- yes girl, I do, come
over here, I got you.

- It's rare that Trixie
and I get to bond

mainly because

(playful music)

Well, she's Trixie.

♪ I've got the real cool moves

(rhythmic music)

♪ I've got the real cool moves

and we have different styles.

The way I see it, I pay
for their pedi services

and I enjoy every minute of it.

That's pretty good Trixie.

You ever think about going
to school to be a nail tech?

Really good stuff.

- You didn't know the art will
and art class in high school,

how you gonna be a manicurist?

(Scoffing)

- See that's the problem
with our community.

We like to go and sit up in
someone else's nail salon

and let them talk crazy to us

and then charge up our
credit cards until they're blue

in the face and then
we keep going back

again and again and again.

Wait that's startin'
to sound like my ex.

Okay you're done.

- That is such a great job
and it didn't cost me a thing.

- [Trixie] Oh wait.

- Okay West Side
story, okay, mhm,

I always keep money close
to me, here you go, thank you.

(Woman humming)

- It's definitely cotton candy.

- Ladies.
- Hi.

- You are not gonna
believe the news that I have

to tell you.

- Does it have something to
do with what's in your hand?

- And what on earth
would make you say that.

- Is that what I think it is?

- It's the best news.

You guys it is such good news,

it is the absolute best news.

- Seem like bad news to me.

- In fact I wrote
a speech about it

because I didn't want
to miss anyone's names.

- Miranda you are really
bothering my shay-shay.

- What is a shay-shay.

- My last nerve.

(Laughing)

- Okay, okay, okay, stop.

Now I don't wanna
be long-winded,

I'm gonna try not to be
but let's see, here it goes.

(Throat clearing)

To my favorite ladies
in the world, that's you,

I've caused a lot of
trouble maybe not a lot,

maybe just a little, I
mean some, okay we'll go

with a little.

I've caused a little trouble
in each and everyone

of your lives and I
know it has been easy

to be one of your sisters in
our sisterhood of Christ and...

- girl what is this sermon?

I'm about to take
up a collection.

- Stop it.
- Stop.

- Miranda is well, how
could I explain Miranda,

she's the kind of girl who
sat in the back of the bus

with the boys and in
the front of the class

with her hand always raised.

I mean don't get me wrong,
she is a great paralegal.

She's just,

special.

- Well I must say that
we're all pretty spectacular

and great and amazing
and what I hold in my hand

is a true testament
that we can all have

what we asked for if
we just stay steadfast

in our own teachings
and stay prayed up

and our cups will runneth over

and men will give into
our bosoms because i...

- well honey,

someone's already been
up in your bosom alright.

(Chuckling)

- Girl you're pregnant.

- I am pregnant,
how did you know?

- Wait, Miranda are you sure?

- Yes I'm sure, wanna see?

- Oh, alright.
- Oh.

- Not over my food,
not over my food.

- [Miranda] I'm just trying
to show you, come here.

- [Trixie] Nope!

- Alright well come
over and give me a hug.

Congratulations!

This child has been
goin' on for years,

on and on about how
she couldn't conceive

and about how the doctors
told her if she did conceive

she would have a
high risk pregnancy.

What the doctor didn't tell her

is that her ex-boyfriend
wished bad on her,

okay, because she
broke up with him

after she caught
him cheating on her

with her best friend's cousin.

Did you get that?

Poor child.

- Well I don't
believe you this time.

- That's fine.

'Cause you know there's
always one sour apple

in the bag from the
hood corner store.

But you know what Trixie, bam.

- Oh, girl.
- This is proof.

- No wait.
- Look!

- Don't be leaving your
little girl thing tinkle sprinkle

all around the office,
girl is it even dry yet?

Oh my god, oh
my god, I'm melting.

- It's very unsanitary.

(Laughing)

- The doctors thought
it wouldn't happen

and now it's happening.

Oh wait, there's
something in my eye.

There, what's that?

A blessing.

- [Tina] I know you always
wanted to have a baby Miranda.

- I do, and you
guys I am pregnant.

Me and that sexy bartender.

- Oh, he is sexy.
- Mhm.

He spent countless
and sleepless nights

depositing the seed in me

and no I didn't tell
me, but oh child, listen.

- 10,000 hours huh?
- Mhm, mhm.

- Wait what's 10,000 hours?

- Well, Malcolm
gladwell wrote a book

and he said any one person
that spends 10,000 hours

on any one thing, can
be pretty much classified

as an expert.

- Yeah.
- That's true.

- Okay.

Well I guess that makes
him an expert marksmen

because he
definitely hit the Mark.

- Oh!
- Boop!

- Are you sure you're
ready to have a baby

change your entire life,
because there will be no more

late nights and sleeping in.

There'll be no more sake
and Sushi in silver lake

and there'll be no more
spur of the moment trips

for the girls.

Exactly, it'll be just a
good ol' fashioned marriage

with a stepson

and he'll say he'll stay with
you through thick and thin,

through death do you part and

then he'll meet a 20 year old

and she'll have one credit shy
of a community college degree

and she'll also enjoy putting
parmesan on the cheese

at a local pizzeria,
but I'm the millionaire.

I'm the one with the law degree.

I'm the one with the house.

- [Trixie] Tina.

- You guys I am ready.

- I can hardly wait
to be a godmother.

You know I've always
wanted to be that person

that's like, you know, kid
comes over your house

and you're just
like, you know what,

I don't know what
kind of crazy stuff

ya'll be doin' up in
your house honey,

but you can do that
up in here honey.

I ain't the one, are
you layin' on the couch

or are you just
too lazy to get up

and you send them
on their merry way.

- That's what you
did to me as a kid.

(Gentle music)

- So Mr. Lawten gets
out of his wheelchair

and decides he wants
to approach the bench

with myself and the
rest of the attorneys.

My first reaction
was to yell so loud

that I be held in contempt but

jail does not look as good
on me as it does on Trixie.

- What?

I met some nice people
in there, just so you know

and they sell chicken.

(Sighing)

- [Miranda] Hey ladies.

- Muffy.
- Hi.

Oh no, I can't
Guillermo, I'm with child.

- What do you got there Miranda?

- I did a little shopping.

- [Tina] Oh, what'd you get?

- Wanna see?

- [Tina] Yeah, you
got a lot of bags there.

- Oh baby clothes.

I'm so glad we didn't
wait to order our food.

- Now I'll admit, it was a
little terrifying at first but.

Oh!

Right?

I'm sure that

this is gonna be the years
of my life moving forward.

- Oh these are so cute.

I wish they had these when
my little Myles was a baby.

Are you sure about this sweetie,

so you really think
it's gonna be a boy?

- Is there gonna be anything?

- You guys it's fine,
I'm prepared either way.

And as far as i'm
concerned you ladies

can fight amongst each
other on who's gonna babysit

for baby muggshott first.
- Oh god.

- And that's two g's in
muggs and two t's in shott.

- You can't be serious.

- No, come on it's a joke!

Girls come on, who would
name their child muggshott?

Even if the baby
daddy does think

it's a pretty cool name.

Oh wait before I forget.

You ladies definitely don't
wanna miss this experience.

These are invitation to
go to the baby bliss class.

You know with
Stacey, Stacey bell,

she's the doula
over in studio city.

- Yes yes yes yes,
I've heard of her.

She's the woman who
does that segment on TV

and she tells you how
to raise your children.

- Oh!

No, I've never heard of her.

- You're taking
this really seriously.

Don't you wanna wait
until you know for sure?

- Do you even know who
the baby's daddy is or?

Girl come on, you
know we've hung out.

This could really
be a serious episode

of fraternity, you know
what was that show called

about the paternity?
- Yeah, paternity are us.

- Yeah.

- Stop, I definitely who the
baby's daddy is, come on!

Look I know all the
men that I slept with

in the last two months.

It can't be any more
than one of one, maybe.

- It could be that barista
at Carlisle coffee girl.

Did he even wear protection?

- Oh yeah.

Yeah.
- That's my girl.

That spoken word poet we
met on ventura boulevard.

Oh, you be my
sun, I'll be your body.

- Okay, stop teasing
'cause come on he was cute.

- Oh girl.

You shoulda saw him it was

like a force.
- You know wait a minute,

I thought you ladies were
suppose to be happy for me.

- Whoa, whoa, whoa we are.

- We are.
- We are, we are.

- We're very happy for you.
- We're so happy for you.

Oh I'm so happy I have to go.

Bye ladies.

- Well I'm very excited.

(Cars rumbling and honking)

- Oh my gosh, I wanna
thank you ladies so much

for coming here today.

This really means a lot to me.

- Well you know what girl,

what is up with
these breast suits?

(Laughing)

- I actually like mine.

Girl, yo I'm wearin'
this this weekend,

I get a lot of turn of
all the heads with this.

- Well I'm here because
Natasha has exempted me

from watching nails for
the next three months.

- You cut a deal with Tina?

You coulda gave that to me.

- Okay sis, my hands
were tied, okay?

Plus, I need you pick
up Myles from karate

when I work late.

- You trippin'.

- Well what did you get?

- A weed's express
gift card for $100.

- I'll trade with you.

- Oh uh uh.
- Why not?

- Girl, you live in my house

and Tina you, well
Tina where do you live?

- Yeah?

- Truth is, no one
knows where Tina lives.

When I pick up Myles,

I just meet her in
the mall parking lot.

By the bloomingdale's.

(Rhythmic music)

- Hey.

Welcome, to baby bliss class

with your doula, yours
truly, doula Stacey.

(Screaming)

(Applauding)

(Playful music)

- Okay, I like her energy.

(Baby rattling)

- In this class, we're
gonna learn how

to become difference makers.

So we're gonna learn
how to maintain the rough

and rigorous
schedule you'll need

to maintain for
your beautiful baby.

How many of you
are first time mothers?

- [Miranda] Me.

- Great, yes.

I wanna congratulate you

on making one of the
most important decisions

you'll ever make in your life.

Yes.

- Will this be what it's
like to have a nine to five

and never get paid up.

- Oh would you shut up.

- Now, over here you
have everything you'll need

to be readily available
for when your baby arrives.

But it's missing something,

something you can't see.

What's it missing?

- A baby's first
pair of Jordans.

- An iPad, running on
a high speed network

filled with all of the
baby's favorite animations

so she can stay busy while mommy

has a tall glass of wine
after a long day in court.

Isn't that right mama's baby?

Yes it is, yes it is.

(Tina squirming)

- Oh my gosh.

Well I'm gonna take a plunge
into the deep end and say

I don't know.

- Great answer.

Really great.
- Thank you.

- Yes.

It's love ladies.

- Oh.
- Oh of course.

- Makes sense, of course.
- Of course, makes sense.

- You see, a lot of
us forget to add love

to help nourish
and raise our child,

the way we're suppose to.

Now we're gonna
learn how to breastfeed.

- Okay, sit this one out.

- What are you doing?

- Are you serious?
- Yes.

- I'm getting
flashbacks of that okay?

That was tough on my girls.

- You are here, you're
doing everything.

- Okay, these four ladies

are getting on my damn nerves.

They say the children
pick the parents

before they come up from heaven.

Wow, they might have
some come up from hell

the way these ladies are acting.

(Rhythmic music)

Alright ladies, to all of you
that have complete the lesson,

go ahead and give yourselves
a round of applause, yes!

(Applauding)

- Woo! (Playful music)

I'm tired.

I just wanna take a nap.

(Baby thudding)

- So

what'd you think?

- I think that I am 100%
ready to be a mom.

- Well, sweety,
you do know that...

- in fact, excuse me, doula.

Doula Stacey, if I can
have a word with you?

- [Stacey] Sure!

- I just wanted to come
over and say thank you.

There was a time that I thought

that this day would
never be possible,

but thanks to you I know
that I'm gonna be the best

mother in the world,
you know sometimes

I'm a little heavy-handed.

- Of course, of course.

- And again, congratulation.

You're gonna make
a fine fine mother.

Now if you'll excuse me
ladies, I have somewhere to be.

- Okay thank you.

- You know you just
seem so much nicer on TV.

- Listen, I don't
mean to be rude,

I just really want to go
home and get a parking spot

outside of my condo.

I got these new
neighbors, it's a whole thing.

- No just go ahead, go
and let her get that spot.

- You know what, they
don't mean anything by that.

Look, I know, that you
are a perfect mother

and I'm sure that people

are always willing to
give their arms and legs

to know how to
mother their children

the way you mother yours.

- Yeah, see.

- Don't let me find out
that your kids is locked

in a basement like that
movie, what's that movie called?

The people with the kids.

- The kids were
under the stairs.

- Were under the stairs.
- Oh my gosh, oh my gosh.

I'm still having PTSD
from that movie.

So scary.
- It gave me nightmares

when I was in high school.

- Me too.
- Horrible.

- Damn near college.

- Goodness, no, no, no,
no, no, nothing like that,

no, no, no.

- Okay well how many
kids do you have?

- None.

- Damn, this half a
hair ain't got no kids.

- The plot thickens.
- Wow.

- Listen, it's
nothing like that.

I just haven't found a man
to make me a wife first so,

I found it's better to
start teaching parents

on how to be the
best that they can be

to bring a child
into this world.

- Like me.
- Yeah.

- Oh my god, thank you so much.

Oh it's so cool.

- If it makes y'all
feel any better,

I am a mom to 11 cats, I've
adopted them, yes, yes, yes.

So therefore I am a pet parent.

- Wait hold up, that
cat lady getting paid

off of teaching birth,
diaper, and feeding classes

and she got 12 cats?

She's a real mvp for
cleaning all them little boxes.

I know there's a case
in here somewhere.

Defamation of character, no.

False persona, you know,
just give me a minute,

I'll think of one.

You know, for the people.

- Honey, do you
always wear the negative

test around your neck?

Yeah I've had some
clients, they've done this

and they've actually kept
them and labeled them

and named them, it's
a whole thing, yeah.

- My test is positive see?

- Honey, unless I'm blind,
one line means negative.

- One line.
- Oh.

- Wait a minute
one line, you guys?

- It's one.
- Sweetie, sweetie,

it's one pink line.
- No it's two, it's two.

- You blockin' it.
- But there was

two lines this morning.
- It's just one line,

it's one line.

(Sighing)

- Yeah.

I just need a minute.

(Pregnancy test clattering)

- Have any of you ladies
ever been pregnant before?

- I have.
- Yes, but it was an accident.

- Like a car accident.

- More like a train
wreck, accident, just train.

- You ladies are silly.

Listen.

What typically happens
is a false line will show up

and that line is called
an evaporation line.

- I think that's what
happened to me.

That's what happened.

- Honestly, it just disappears

so you probably
didn't even notice.

- You learn something
new everyday.

I was racking my brains,
where did my baby go?

I had no idea
where the baby went.

Baby was gone.

Now I know it evaporated.

- I'm sure a baby will come.

Good luck and

thank you.
- No hush,

take your damn babies.

Stupid class.
- You're a phony.

You're a phony.
- You know what.

- Cat parent.

- Very unsanitary lady.
- Fake doula!

- Let's go get our parking spot.

Oh, let's go.

- Let's key her car.
- Drive fast, drive by.

- I'll pop her.
- Baby.

(Keyboard clattering)

(Phone ringing)

- Miranda, you okay?

- Yeah, I'm good.

So I took another pregnancy
test and it was negative.

Yeah, she was right.

But it's okay.

I've made my peace with it.

(Phone ringing)

- You lookin' at
kittens to adopt again?

- Yeah.

Since I can't have children,

I figured I need to have
some other kind of life

besides me at my house.

Maybe she'll meet a mate.

Get married.

Have some kitties.

Wait.

Cats can't get married can they?

- Yeah.

- Aw.

- Oh wait go back.

That looks like a gremlin.

- You know what it does

and I've always
wanted a little maguey.

- A what?

- You know, from
the movie gremlins.

About the little
cute furry creatures,

that couldn't get wet and
they use to always be like,

bright light, bright light.

- Oh.

You know my boy ray ray
he got the plug on those.

He can get us some from China.

- I'm broke, so i'ma
stick to the cats.

- [Trixie] Okay.

- I actually don't
think it's a good idea.

You know Miranda's a bit clingy.

That poor feline
wouldn't stand a chance.

Giving a whole new
definition to the cat lady,

you know what I'm sayin'?

- So have you decided
which cat to adopt yet?

- Girl I think I just needed

a little extra
attention here today.

You know ain't no other
kitten gonna be around

my house perm but me.

(Miranda meowing)

- I'm so not like that.

- You know what fine.

It was funny in my head
when I said it to myself.

- Looks like they stay
in your head child.

(Phone ringing)

♪ don't stop

♪ don't, don't, don't stop

♪ don't, don't stop

♪ don't stop, haunt them

♪ grow a life you

♪ you can stop you

♪ you can stop okay, Kay

♪ Kay, Kay, Kay, Kay

♪ move move

♪ Kay, Kay, Kay, Kay

♪ kick that place you've

♪ searchin' together let's go

♪ as we climb up the
hill don't slow down ♪

♪ pedal a little more

♪ the mind is
wrecking, it's in control ♪

♪ your wheels are
turning a little more ♪

♪ throwing higher
went up the mountain ♪

♪ keep it steady
don't watch the clock ♪

♪ go round, round

♪ cycle, cycle

♪ life is a cycle

♪ cycle, cycle

♪ life is a cycle

♪ move, move, move, move

♪ life is a cycle

♪ cycle, cycle

♪ life is a cycle

♪ cycle, cycle

♪ life is a cycle

♪ cycle, cycle

♪ life is a cycle

♪ we are learning

♪ always turning

♪ later cannot

♪ stop the time

♪ always merging

♪ into lanes that

♪ better suit us

♪ as we ride, switch it up

♪ switching together let's go

♪ as we climb up the
hill don't slow down ♪

♪ pedal a little more

♪ the mind is
wrecking it's in control ♪

♪ your wheels are
turning a little more ♪

♪ going higher and
up the mountain ♪

♪ keep it steady
don't watch the clock ♪

♪ go round, round

♪ cycle, cycle

♪ life is a cycle

♪ cycle, cycle

♪ life is a cycle

♪ cycle, cycle

♪ life is a cycle

♪ cycle, cycle

♪ life is a cycle

♪ cycle, cycle

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