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[music playing]
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(SINGING) You've got to
accentuate the positive,
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00:00:19,178 --> 00:00:21,178
eliminate the negative.
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00:00:21,254 --> 00:00:24,181
And latch on to the affirmative.
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00:00:24,257 --> 00:00:27,517
And don't mess with
Mr. In-between.
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00:00:27,594 --> 00:00:31,113
You've got to spread
joy up to the maximum,
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00:00:31,190 --> 00:00:38,278
bring gloom down to the minimum,
have faith in pandemonium,
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00:00:38,355 --> 00:00:40,864
liable to walk up on the scene.
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You will not stray, my last
remark, Jonah in the whale,
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00:00:45,445 --> 00:00:47,579
Noah in the ark.
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00:00:47,656 --> 00:00:53,376
What did they did just when
everything looked so dark?
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00:00:53,453 --> 00:01:00,217
Man, they said you got to
accentuate the positives.
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Eliminate the
negative and latch--
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00:01:02,921 --> 00:01:05,347
KEN HYMAN: Hello, welcome
back to "Group Hug,"
15
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I am your host, Ken Hyman.
16
00:01:07,175 --> 00:01:08,692
Touching you, touching me.
17
00:01:08,769 --> 00:01:12,312
My guest today is psychologist
and author Dr. Richard Clayton.
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00:01:12,389 --> 00:01:16,241
He has written a new book
titled " Ready, Set, Let Go,
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00:01:16,318 --> 00:01:18,568
A Guide To Anger Management."
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00:01:18,645 --> 00:01:22,239
Doctor, you first applied the
methods described in your book
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to patients in your own
private care, is that correct?
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00:01:24,526 --> 00:01:25,884
Yes.
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00:01:25,961 --> 00:01:27,744
I was trying to solve
some of my own issues,
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and while doing so I discovered
something that worked so well.
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00:01:31,950 --> 00:01:33,834
I thought I would use
it to help other people.
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00:01:33,910 --> 00:01:36,253
KEN HYMAN: I'd like to open
the lines up to callers.
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If anyone out there is
dealing with anger issues,
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Dr. Richard Clayton
is standing by.
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00:01:42,711 --> 00:01:43,885
And we have a call.
Hello?
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00:01:43,962 --> 00:01:44,928
MAN: Yeah.
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00:01:45,005 --> 00:01:46,730
I got a little bit of a problem.
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00:01:46,807 --> 00:01:48,089
OK, shoot.
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00:01:48,166 --> 00:01:49,616
MAN: You know what
my problem is?
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00:01:49,618 --> 00:01:51,643
This used to be a rock
station, and now we've
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got Mr. Touchy Feely here
talking out of his ass!
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You suck, Hyman!
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00:01:56,592 --> 00:01:58,275
I'm going to slash your tires.
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00:01:58,351 --> 00:01:59,526
Don't cut him off.
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00:01:59,537 --> 00:02:01,245
Uh, caller.
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00:02:01,321 --> 00:02:04,739
What is it exactly about the
show that makes you so angry?
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00:02:04,750 --> 00:02:07,284
MAN: That it sucks.
- OK, good.
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00:02:07,360 --> 00:02:10,921
Now do you honestly think that
slashing Mr. Hyman's tires
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00:02:10,998 --> 00:02:12,706
is going to make
you feel any better?
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00:02:12,782 --> 00:02:13,623
MAN: Yeah.
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00:02:13,700 --> 00:02:15,366
Yeah, I think it will.
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00:02:15,444 --> 00:02:17,627
In fact, many of the things
that we do when we are angry
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00:02:17,704 --> 00:02:19,796
don't make us feel
any better at all.
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00:02:19,807 --> 00:02:22,465
They often make us feel worse.
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We're in control of our
emotions, not the other way
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00:02:24,336 --> 00:02:25,501
around.
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00:02:25,579 --> 00:02:27,345
First step to take
control of our lives
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00:02:27,422 --> 00:02:30,274
is learning to master
the emotional self.
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00:02:30,350 --> 00:02:31,474
What are you
starting at me for?
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Eyes front.
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00:02:32,469 --> 00:02:34,210
Let's go, jackass.
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00:02:34,212 --> 00:02:37,156
RICHARD CLAYTON: Now I'd like
you to do something for me.
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00:02:37,232 --> 00:02:40,909
I'd like you to close your
eyes, take a deep breath,
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00:02:40,986 --> 00:02:42,861
repeat after me.
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00:02:42,938 --> 00:02:44,321
Ready?
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00:02:44,397 --> 00:02:45,822
Ready.
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00:02:45,899 --> 00:02:46,990
Set.
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00:02:47,067 --> 00:02:48,658
Set.
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00:02:48,735 --> 00:02:49,743
Let go.
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00:02:49,819 --> 00:02:50,702
Let go.
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Let go.
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00:02:51,738 --> 00:02:52,588
Let go.
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00:02:55,450 --> 00:02:57,417
How do you feel?
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00:02:57,494 --> 00:02:58,835
Let go.
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00:02:58,912 --> 00:03:00,420
Yeah.
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00:03:00,497 --> 00:03:02,881
I feel real good.
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00:03:02,958 --> 00:03:03,924
[crunching sound]
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00:03:04,000 --> 00:03:06,801
What, are you out of your mind?
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00:03:06,878 --> 00:03:08,511
[honking]
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That's all the time we have
for on "Group Hug" today.
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00:03:11,591 --> 00:03:13,567
I'd like to thank our
guest, Dr. Richard Clayton.
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00:03:13,644 --> 00:03:15,560
The book is "Ready,
Set, Let Go."
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00:03:15,637 --> 00:03:17,395
It's available at better
bookstores everywhere.
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00:03:17,472 --> 00:03:21,942
I'm Ken Hyman, touching you,
touching me, till next time.
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00:03:22,018 --> 00:03:24,203
You were great in there, doc.
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00:03:24,279 --> 00:03:25,320
Oh, thank you honey.
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00:03:25,397 --> 00:03:27,239
It's just-- it's
all so exciting.
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00:03:27,315 --> 00:03:28,865
In three weeks I'll
be married to the most
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00:03:28,942 --> 00:03:30,700
wonderful girl in the world.
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00:03:30,777 --> 00:03:31,868
Could life be any sweeter?
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00:03:31,945 --> 00:03:33,745
Yeah, you could be me?
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00:03:33,822 --> 00:03:35,997
[music playing]
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(SINGING) Man you got to
accentuate the positive,
88
00:03:41,621 --> 00:03:46,850
eliminate the negative, and
latch on to the affirmative.
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00:03:46,927 --> 00:03:49,636
And don't mess
with Mr In Between.
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00:03:49,647 --> 00:03:53,598
No, don't mess
with Mr In Between.
91
00:03:53,675 --> 00:03:57,903
No, don't mess
with Mr In Between.
92
00:04:04,060 --> 00:04:06,569
DOUG CLAYTON: I don't think we
have enough women in our lives.
93
00:04:06,646 --> 00:04:07,737
Excuse me.
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00:04:07,814 --> 00:04:09,948
DOUG CLAYTON: I
think that's copper.
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00:04:10,025 --> 00:04:11,574
Mercury.
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00:04:11,651 --> 00:04:12,492
DOUG CLAYTON: Mercury.
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Well done, Ellen.
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00:04:15,905 --> 00:04:20,750
So, Ellen, pretty soon you'll
be part of the Clayton family.
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00:04:20,827 --> 00:04:22,877
How does it feel?
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00:04:22,954 --> 00:04:23,795
Well, it's an honor.
101
00:04:23,872 --> 00:04:25,389
I love your son much.
102
00:04:25,465 --> 00:04:27,882
Oh Ellen, that's
so very sweet.
103
00:04:27,959 --> 00:04:30,885
But what do you
think of Richard?
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00:04:30,962 --> 00:04:33,430
Ah, switch, two points.
105
00:04:33,506 --> 00:04:35,598
Give it up, mom.
Come on.
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00:04:35,675 --> 00:04:38,768
Not at the table.
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00:04:38,845 --> 00:04:41,479
If you ask me, the entire
public welfare system
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00:04:41,556 --> 00:04:43,114
should be abolished.
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00:04:43,192 --> 00:04:44,774
RICHARD CLAYTON: That's easy
enough for you to say dad.
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00:04:44,851 --> 00:04:47,444
You're white, and you're the
son of a wealthy industrialist.
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00:04:47,520 --> 00:04:48,987
As am I. But some
people are born
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00:04:49,064 --> 00:04:51,614
into disadvantage, because
of their background,
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00:04:51,691 --> 00:04:52,916
or the color of their skin.
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00:04:52,993 --> 00:04:53,867
Or--
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00:04:53,943 --> 00:04:55,618
Yes, yes.
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00:04:55,695 --> 00:04:57,829
It sounds like the same bunch
of typical liberal claptrap.
117
00:04:57,906 --> 00:04:59,423
Thank you, Rosa.
118
00:04:59,499 --> 00:05:00,415
Thank you very much.
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00:05:00,492 --> 00:05:01,916
You're a good woman.
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00:05:01,993 --> 00:05:05,795
Your people are a fine
people, a proud people.
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00:05:05,872 --> 00:05:08,631
She doesn't understand
what you're saying, Richard.
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00:05:08,708 --> 00:05:10,884
Everyone understands the
language of respect, mother.
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00:05:10,960 --> 00:05:12,010
Give it a rest.
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00:05:12,087 --> 00:05:13,353
Have some brandy.
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00:05:13,430 --> 00:05:14,429
No thank you, Mitch.
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00:05:14,506 --> 00:05:15,963
You know I don't drink anymore.
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00:05:16,041 --> 00:05:18,933
How a son of mine turned
into such a bleeding heart,
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00:05:18,944 --> 00:05:20,160
I will never know.
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00:05:20,236 --> 00:05:22,145
Maybe he gets it
from his father.
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00:05:22,222 --> 00:05:23,521
Well if that were
the case, then I'd
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00:05:23,598 --> 00:05:25,490
have no compassion whatsoever.
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00:05:25,567 --> 00:05:26,900
Not necessarily.
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00:05:26,976 --> 00:05:28,485
Eh, Mitch.
134
00:05:28,561 --> 00:05:30,487
I think you've had one too many.
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00:05:30,497 --> 00:05:32,906
But isn't it time
he knew the truth?
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00:05:32,982 --> 00:05:33,823
Truth about what?
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00:05:33,900 --> 00:05:35,658
Mitchell.
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00:05:35,735 --> 00:05:36,659
About the beat.
139
00:05:36,736 --> 00:05:37,577
Bear?
140
00:05:37,654 --> 00:05:38,928
What bear?
141
00:05:39,005 --> 00:05:40,096
What, what, what is
he talking about?
142
00:05:40,173 --> 00:05:42,665
- Maybe it's best if I show you.
- Mitch.
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00:05:42,742 --> 00:05:43,925
Mitch, get back here.
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00:05:48,081 --> 00:05:49,672
Where is he going.
145
00:05:49,749 --> 00:05:51,925
Maybe we should just tell him.
146
00:05:52,001 --> 00:05:53,510
Tell me what?
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00:05:53,586 --> 00:05:55,845
Richard, we didn't want
to tell you like this.
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00:05:55,922 --> 00:05:57,597
But I suppose
there's no easy way,
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00:05:57,674 --> 00:05:59,974
and with the wedding
coming up, I suppose it's
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00:06:00,051 --> 00:06:02,811
time that you know the truth.
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00:06:02,821 --> 00:06:06,114
Rosa, [non-english speech].
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00:06:10,204 --> 00:06:14,697
Although we loved both
you and Mitch equally,
153
00:06:14,774 --> 00:06:17,784
and we raised both
of you as our own,
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00:06:17,795 --> 00:06:22,589
I'm not your father,
strictly speaking.
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00:06:24,993 --> 00:06:25,801
I don't understand.
156
00:06:25,877 --> 00:06:27,085
What do you mean?
157
00:06:27,162 --> 00:06:28,720
I'm not your
biological mother either.
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00:06:32,000 --> 00:06:33,716
Is this is some kind of joke?
159
00:06:33,793 --> 00:06:36,010
No, it's not a joke, Richard.
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00:06:36,087 --> 00:06:38,480
I'm afraid you
were adopted, son.
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00:06:42,861 --> 00:06:45,520
Adopted?
162
00:06:45,597 --> 00:06:47,147
But that's impossible.
163
00:06:47,223 --> 00:06:49,533
Not necessarily.
164
00:06:49,609 --> 00:06:51,209
I was up in the
attic last night,
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00:06:51,286 --> 00:06:56,698
digging through some of our
old stuff, and I found this.
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00:06:56,708 --> 00:06:58,533
What is this?
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00:06:58,610 --> 00:07:00,577
The orphanage found
you on the doorstep
168
00:07:00,653 --> 00:07:02,045
with just that one item.
169
00:07:02,122 --> 00:07:03,755
You were only a few months old.
170
00:07:06,743 --> 00:07:09,169
Now, let's not make
a big scene, Richard.
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00:07:09,245 --> 00:07:10,753
Who's making a big scene?
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00:07:10,830 --> 00:07:12,922
You're telling me
that I'm adopted?
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00:07:12,933 --> 00:07:14,632
Richard, lower your voice.
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00:07:14,709 --> 00:07:16,259
I can't believe
what I'm hearing.
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00:07:16,270 --> 00:07:17,594
It's in the past.
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00:07:17,670 --> 00:07:19,053
What difference does it make?
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00:07:19,130 --> 00:07:21,014
Well, I'm 34 years old?
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00:07:21,090 --> 00:07:22,566
Did it cross your
mind that I would
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00:07:22,642 --> 00:07:23,567
want this information earlier?
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00:07:23,643 --> 00:07:24,568
What for?
181
00:07:24,644 --> 00:07:25,777
So you could be traumatized?
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00:07:31,226 --> 00:07:34,152
RICHARD CLAYTON: Accept.
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00:07:34,229 --> 00:07:36,079
Let go.
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00:07:36,156 --> 00:07:38,781
[dolphins chirping]
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00:07:38,858 --> 00:07:40,667
Ready, set, let go.
186
00:07:45,281 --> 00:07:46,164
You OK, doc?
187
00:07:46,241 --> 00:07:48,666
Oh, I'm fine, honey.
188
00:07:48,743 --> 00:07:51,887
I'm better than fine, I'm good.
189
00:07:51,963 --> 00:07:53,963
Honey, what are
we listening to?
190
00:07:54,040 --> 00:07:57,133
Oh, it's a meditation tape.
191
00:07:57,210 --> 00:08:00,803
Sea of serenity.
Soothing, isn't it?
192
00:08:00,880 --> 00:08:01,605
Yeah.
193
00:08:08,304 --> 00:08:09,729
RICHARD CLAYTON: So,
can you find them?
194
00:08:09,806 --> 00:08:12,690
MAN: I've been doing
this for over 25 years.
195
00:08:12,767 --> 00:08:15,985
Well, how does
one go about this?
196
00:08:16,062 --> 00:08:19,239
In a case like this, where
there's not a lot to go on,
197
00:08:19,249 --> 00:08:21,282
we generally start
by placing ads
198
00:08:21,359 --> 00:08:24,536
in the papers of the town you
were found in, posting notices
199
00:08:24,612 --> 00:08:26,146
and such.
200
00:08:26,222 --> 00:08:29,707
If they're out there, and
they're alive, I'll find them.
201
00:08:29,784 --> 00:08:30,509
Good.
202
00:08:35,915 --> 00:08:37,265
Of course, the
layout is fantastic.
203
00:08:37,342 --> 00:08:40,635
I wish I had that much
confidence in the publicity.
204
00:08:40,646 --> 00:08:42,720
No, they're
taking care of you.
205
00:08:42,797 --> 00:08:44,097
In fact, there's been
plenty of publicity
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00:08:44,173 --> 00:08:45,881
for this book signing on Monday.
207
00:08:45,883 --> 00:08:48,735
In fact, they even
took out a great big ad
208
00:08:48,812 --> 00:08:49,736
in today's "Tribune."
209
00:08:52,890 --> 00:08:54,774
Is that the picture
they're going to use?
210
00:08:54,851 --> 00:08:56,776
Yeah.
211
00:08:56,853 --> 00:08:59,037
Such a stiff.
212
00:08:59,114 --> 00:09:00,247
I don't really look
like that, do I?
213
00:09:03,943 --> 00:09:04,826
No.
214
00:09:04,902 --> 00:09:06,035
Not at all.
215
00:09:06,112 --> 00:09:06,920
[phone rings]
216
00:09:06,997 --> 00:09:07,837
I'm sorry.
217
00:09:07,914 --> 00:09:09,372
I'll just-- one second.
218
00:09:09,449 --> 00:09:10,323
Hello.
219
00:09:10,400 --> 00:09:11,207
AL SPICER: Spicer here.
220
00:09:11,284 --> 00:09:12,166
Good news.
221
00:09:12,243 --> 00:09:13,693
RICHARD CLAYTON: Yes?
222
00:09:13,770 --> 00:09:16,879
Looks like I found
your birth parents.
223
00:09:16,956 --> 00:09:17,797
That's terrific.
224
00:09:17,808 --> 00:09:19,683
Who are they?
225
00:09:19,759 --> 00:09:22,051
A Frank and Agnes--
226
00:09:22,128 --> 00:09:23,562
I may be mispronouncing
this, Man-u-re.
227
00:09:25,023 --> 00:09:26,598
Yeah, Man-u-re, that
either would be French.
228
00:09:26,674 --> 00:09:27,932
Where do they live?
229
00:09:28,009 --> 00:09:28,958
Pekin, Illinois.
230
00:09:29,035 --> 00:09:30,685
It's near Peoria.
231
00:09:30,762 --> 00:09:32,270
That's just a few
hours from here.
232
00:09:32,347 --> 00:09:33,980
I'm sure they'd love
to come out for a visit.
233
00:09:33,991 --> 00:09:35,348
Want me to call to set this up?
234
00:09:35,425 --> 00:09:36,908
Perfect.
That's perfect.
235
00:09:36,985 --> 00:09:38,017
We'll have a party.
236
00:09:38,019 --> 00:09:40,069
I'll introduce them to everyone.
237
00:09:40,146 --> 00:09:42,706
Oh, this is a nice one.
238
00:09:42,782 --> 00:09:43,981
I hope so.
239
00:09:44,059 --> 00:09:45,208
Richard wants everything
to be perfect.
240
00:09:45,285 --> 00:09:47,660
He gets that look on
his face if it's not.
241
00:09:47,737 --> 00:09:48,795
[rapid knocking]
- Honey!
242
00:09:48,872 --> 00:09:49,829
We found them!
243
00:09:49,906 --> 00:09:50,913
Honey, we found them!
244
00:09:50,990 --> 00:09:51,873
My parents!
245
00:09:51,949 --> 00:09:53,115
[laughter]
246
00:09:53,192 --> 00:09:54,501
They're going to come next week.
247
00:09:54,577 --> 00:09:56,711
They're going to visit,
we're going to have a party!
248
00:09:56,788 --> 00:09:57,920
We found them, I
can't believe it.
249
00:09:57,997 --> 00:09:59,047
I don't know how they did it.
250
00:09:59,123 --> 00:10:00,548
I have to run.
251
00:10:00,625 --> 00:10:01,725
I have an appointment,
but I'll call you later.
252
00:10:01,801 --> 00:10:02,601
All right!
253
00:10:15,390 --> 00:10:17,240
ELLEN MINNOLA: Any
sign of them yet?
254
00:10:17,317 --> 00:10:18,191
No?
255
00:10:18,267 --> 00:10:19,034
Not yet.
256
00:10:25,108 --> 00:10:27,867
I don't know what's
keeping them.
257
00:10:27,944 --> 00:10:30,662
[doorbell rings]
258
00:10:30,738 --> 00:10:31,338
You must be the Manures.
259
00:10:35,284 --> 00:10:37,377
Wow, I had no idea
I was biracial,
260
00:10:37,453 --> 00:10:40,463
but I've always identified with
the struggle of the black man.
261
00:10:40,540 --> 00:10:42,423
And now I know why.
262
00:10:42,500 --> 00:10:44,467
So dad, mom, tell
me about yourself.
263
00:10:44,544 --> 00:10:46,844
I want to know everything.
264
00:10:46,921 --> 00:10:49,272
Well, I graduated Berkeley
in the Summer of Love.
265
00:10:49,349 --> 00:10:51,124
That's where I met your mom.
266
00:10:51,201 --> 00:10:53,810
I was a slogan writer for
many of the popular protest
267
00:10:53,886 --> 00:10:55,978
movements of the '60s and '70s.
268
00:10:56,055 --> 00:10:59,357
Remember, save the
whales, no nukes, peace?
269
00:10:59,434 --> 00:11:00,358
Sure.
270
00:11:00,435 --> 00:11:01,984
Those were mine.
271
00:11:02,061 --> 00:11:03,911
Wow.
272
00:11:03,989 --> 00:11:06,239
And I'm the founder of the
Organization For Rethinking
273
00:11:06,315 --> 00:11:08,083
Ethnocentric Opinion.
274
00:11:08,159 --> 00:11:10,085
We are young.
275
00:11:10,161 --> 00:11:12,036
Such good work.
276
00:11:12,113 --> 00:11:13,763
You two are amazing.
277
00:11:13,765 --> 00:11:16,207
And you're the son
we've always wanted.
278
00:11:16,284 --> 00:11:17,709
I try, mom.
279
00:11:17,785 --> 00:11:19,794
I really do.
280
00:11:19,871 --> 00:11:24,465
But tell me something,
why did you give me up?
281
00:11:24,542 --> 00:11:27,719
Well, it was all part of
a sociological experiment.
282
00:11:27,795 --> 00:11:29,312
We wanted to see if
the child of open
283
00:11:29,389 --> 00:11:33,099
minded liberal humanitarians
like ourselves could flourish
284
00:11:33,176 --> 00:11:36,894
in a family of narrow minded,
hypocritical individuals
285
00:11:36,971 --> 00:11:38,062
like the Clayton.
286
00:11:38,139 --> 00:11:39,613
I always knew it.
287
00:11:39,691 --> 00:11:43,192
And I must say that you
passed with flying colors.
288
00:11:43,269 --> 00:11:45,829
Congratulations, son.
289
00:11:45,905 --> 00:11:47,163
We love you.
290
00:11:55,531 --> 00:11:56,414
Hey doc?
291
00:11:56,491 --> 00:11:57,999
Do I look OK?
292
00:11:58,075 --> 00:12:00,209
I want to make a
good impression.
293
00:12:00,286 --> 00:12:02,295
Bunny, you look beautiful.
294
00:12:02,305 --> 00:12:05,214
My god, they're
going to love you.
295
00:12:05,291 --> 00:12:07,049
I don't know how they
could not love you.
296
00:12:07,126 --> 00:12:09,177
You know, I'm the one
who should be worried.
297
00:12:09,253 --> 00:12:10,511
What if I'm a
disappointment to them?
298
00:12:10,588 --> 00:12:11,846
You have nothing
to worry about,
299
00:12:11,923 --> 00:12:14,348
because you are a great man.
300
00:12:14,425 --> 00:12:17,861
You're going to be
the best wife ever.
301
00:12:17,937 --> 00:12:20,229
[bell rings]
302
00:12:20,306 --> 00:12:21,147
Oh my god.
303
00:12:21,224 --> 00:12:22,315
That's them.
304
00:12:22,391 --> 00:12:23,316
Where's my jacket?
305
00:12:23,392 --> 00:12:24,776
You're wearing it.
- Right.
306
00:12:24,786 --> 00:12:25,777
OK.
307
00:12:25,853 --> 00:12:26,486
Do I look OK?
308
00:12:26,562 --> 00:12:27,871
You look fine.
309
00:12:27,947 --> 00:12:29,213
Relax.
310
00:12:29,290 --> 00:12:30,531
I'm meeting my true parents now.
311
00:12:30,608 --> 00:12:32,167
What do I call
them, mom and dad?
312
00:12:32,243 --> 00:12:33,877
No, just call them
Mr and Mrs Manure.
313
00:12:33,953 --> 00:12:35,019
Right.
314
00:12:35,021 --> 00:12:35,536
Right, of course.
315
00:12:35,613 --> 00:12:36,913
Of course.
316
00:12:36,989 --> 00:12:37,505
You ready to go?
317
00:12:42,912 --> 00:12:44,253
Frank Manure.
318
00:12:44,330 --> 00:12:45,797
You must be our son.
319
00:12:45,807 --> 00:12:47,298
How the hell are you?
320
00:12:47,375 --> 00:12:48,382
How the hell are you?
321
00:12:48,459 --> 00:12:49,267
This is quite a moment for us.
322
00:12:52,505 --> 00:12:54,305
I'm sorry, what
was that name again?
323
00:12:54,382 --> 00:12:55,315
Frank
324
00:12:55,391 --> 00:12:56,432
No, the part after that.
325
00:12:56,509 --> 00:12:57,391
Manure.
326
00:12:57,402 --> 00:12:59,185
Is French.
327
00:12:59,196 --> 00:13:00,353
Ah.
328
00:13:00,429 --> 00:13:02,104
Well, you must have
the wrong house.
329
00:13:02,181 --> 00:13:03,940
We were expecting the Man-u-res.
330
00:13:04,016 --> 00:13:04,949
Richard.
331
00:13:07,562 --> 00:13:11,405
And you must be Frank, Jr.
332
00:13:11,482 --> 00:13:12,365
Frank Jr?
333
00:13:12,441 --> 00:13:13,533
That's him all right.
334
00:13:13,609 --> 00:13:14,951
I'd recognize him anywhere.
335
00:13:15,027 --> 00:13:16,485
He takes after my
side of the family.
336
00:13:16,563 --> 00:13:19,163
You call them circus freaks
you come from a family?
337
00:13:19,240 --> 00:13:21,249
It's better than that
white trash you come from.
338
00:13:21,325 --> 00:13:24,168
- Shut the hell up.
- You shut up!
339
00:13:24,179 --> 00:13:26,045
I can't believe it's really you!
340
00:13:26,122 --> 00:13:30,132
FRANK MANURE: Well, we sure
got ourselves a family here.
341
00:13:30,209 --> 00:13:32,093
How old are you, son, anyway?
342
00:13:32,169 --> 00:13:34,136
34?
343
00:13:34,147 --> 00:13:37,223
It was about that time when
I started losing my hair,
344
00:13:37,300 --> 00:13:39,141
but don't let it worry
you none, because it's
345
00:13:39,218 --> 00:13:41,068
a sign of virility.
346
00:13:41,070 --> 00:13:44,313
By the way, when it comes
time to shop for a rug,
347
00:13:44,390 --> 00:13:46,015
I know a good place.
348
00:13:46,092 --> 00:13:50,945
You just tell him you're my
boy, he'll cut you a deal.
349
00:13:51,022 --> 00:13:53,573
Well, why don't
we step inside?
350
00:13:53,649 --> 00:13:57,285
Nothing would please us more.
351
00:13:57,361 --> 00:13:59,203
Can I help you with your--
352
00:13:59,280 --> 00:14:01,372
This here's a cheese ball.
353
00:14:01,449 --> 00:14:03,124
I made it myself
for the occasion.
354
00:14:03,134 --> 00:14:04,125
I hope you like it.
355
00:14:04,201 --> 00:14:06,377
A cheese ball, very nice.
356
00:14:06,454 --> 00:14:09,046
Well, back home I'm
famous for my cheese balls.
357
00:14:09,123 --> 00:14:10,557
I make the best
cheese ball in town.
358
00:14:10,633 --> 00:14:12,058
I can get you the
recipe if you like.
359
00:14:12,135 --> 00:14:13,743
Nobody gives a damn
what the hell are you
360
00:14:13,820 --> 00:14:16,637
put in that rat ball, except
for maybe the Board of Health.
361
00:14:16,714 --> 00:14:18,273
The Board of Health might care.
362
00:14:18,349 --> 00:14:19,891
Why don't you
shut the hell up?
363
00:14:19,967 --> 00:14:22,986
(WHISPERING) He's an alcoholic.
364
00:14:23,062 --> 00:14:24,988
I heard that.
365
00:14:25,064 --> 00:14:26,939
We certainly
appreciate the gesture.
366
00:14:27,016 --> 00:14:27,690
Anyway, thank you.
367
00:14:27,767 --> 00:14:29,567
Don't we, Richard?
368
00:14:29,644 --> 00:14:30,484
Richard?
369
00:14:30,561 --> 00:14:32,528
[whistling]
370
00:14:32,605 --> 00:14:36,240
Well, you certainly have
a beautiful place here, son.
371
00:14:36,251 --> 00:14:39,035
It's got a certain
gene e se qua.
372
00:14:39,111 --> 00:14:41,454
Yes, siree Bob.
373
00:14:41,530 --> 00:14:44,999
You must be really
raking in the dough, son.
374
00:14:45,010 --> 00:14:46,417
What's your racket, anyway?
375
00:14:46,494 --> 00:14:49,587
I'm a psychologist
and a writer.
376
00:14:49,598 --> 00:14:50,546
Whoa.
377
00:14:50,623 --> 00:14:52,131
Well how about that?
378
00:14:52,208 --> 00:14:56,385
I knew these genes was
good for something.
379
00:14:56,462 --> 00:14:58,095
What do you write,son?
380
00:14:58,172 --> 00:15:00,598
I write books
about psychology.
381
00:15:00,609 --> 00:15:03,225
You ever write
a book about dogs?
382
00:15:03,302 --> 00:15:06,646
I sure would really
like a book about a dog.
383
00:15:06,722 --> 00:15:09,148
No, I can't say that I have.
384
00:15:09,225 --> 00:15:10,316
If you do you, let me know.
385
00:15:10,327 --> 00:15:11,242
I'll buy it.
386
00:15:14,480 --> 00:15:16,197
I just can't tell you
how much Richard and I have
387
00:15:16,273 --> 00:15:17,764
been looking forward to this.
388
00:15:17,766 --> 00:15:19,742
I know Richard has a lot
of questions for you.
389
00:15:19,819 --> 00:15:21,652
Don't you, Richard?
390
00:15:21,729 --> 00:15:22,954
RICHARD CLAYTON: I don't really
even know where to begin.
391
00:15:23,030 --> 00:15:25,039
You wore that damn
hair net, didn't you?
392
00:15:25,116 --> 00:15:28,084
I thought I told you not to be
wearing that damn hairnet, when
393
00:15:28,160 --> 00:15:29,836
we meet our boy.
394
00:15:29,912 --> 00:15:31,963
Do you have any idea how ugly
you look with that damned thing
395
00:15:32,039 --> 00:15:32,680
on your head?
396
00:15:32,757 --> 00:15:34,465
Any idea at all?
397
00:15:34,542 --> 00:15:38,511
I told you I have to work the
hairnet to keep my hairs out
398
00:15:38,587 --> 00:15:40,154
of the cheese ball.
399
00:15:40,156 --> 00:15:42,056
FRANK MANURE: Well I'm
going to count to three,
400
00:15:42,133 --> 00:15:45,267
and when I get to three, you
better have that damned thing
401
00:15:45,344 --> 00:15:46,110
off your head.
402
00:15:48,764 --> 00:15:50,606
1.
403
00:15:50,683 --> 00:15:52,233
RICHARD CLAYTON: Uh--
404
00:15:52,309 --> 00:15:53,576
Two.
405
00:15:53,653 --> 00:15:56,612
I ain't taking it off my head.
406
00:15:56,689 --> 00:15:57,655
Three.
407
00:15:57,732 --> 00:15:58,572
That's it.
408
00:15:58,649 --> 00:15:59,573
I'm a-coming for it.
409
00:15:59,584 --> 00:16:02,085
[shrieking]
410
00:16:06,165 --> 00:16:07,164
All right.
411
00:16:07,241 --> 00:16:08,457
Why don't we all calm down here.
412
00:16:08,534 --> 00:16:09,300
I'm sure we can--
413
00:16:21,338 --> 00:16:22,346
- Ooh!
- Oh, Richard.
414
00:16:22,423 --> 00:16:24,765
Oh, honey.
- Are you happy now?
415
00:16:24,842 --> 00:16:26,267
Are you happy now?
416
00:16:26,343 --> 00:16:28,477
We just met our son
not five minutes ago
417
00:16:28,554 --> 00:16:31,355
and you go beat him in the
nuts with that damn rat ball.
418
00:16:31,432 --> 00:16:32,639
You're going to be all right.
419
00:16:32,717 --> 00:16:34,066
Of course he's
going to be all right.
420
00:16:34,143 --> 00:16:36,235
He's tough just
like his old man.
421
00:16:36,312 --> 00:16:38,121
I wish I had a
nickel for every time
422
00:16:38,197 --> 00:16:40,322
I was laid low by one
of them damn things.
423
00:16:40,399 --> 00:16:41,532
I'd be a wealthy man.
424
00:16:41,609 --> 00:16:42,575
Is there anything I can do?
425
00:16:42,651 --> 00:16:45,786
Ain't you done enough already?
426
00:16:45,863 --> 00:16:49,665
You're probably wondering
why we gave you up, son.
427
00:16:49,742 --> 00:16:51,208
Well, it's the same old story.
428
00:16:51,285 --> 00:16:53,419
You probably heard 1,000 times.
429
00:16:53,496 --> 00:16:58,132
Boy meets girl, they fall
in love, girl gets pregnant,
430
00:16:58,143 --> 00:17:04,138
boy gets arrested for
impersonating meat inspector.
431
00:17:04,149 --> 00:17:05,648
I'm sorry, what
was that last part?
432
00:17:05,725 --> 00:17:07,349
It's a long story.
433
00:17:07,426 --> 00:17:09,060
We just thought that
you'd have a better
434
00:17:09,136 --> 00:17:12,354
chance in life with a family
that could provide for you.
435
00:17:12,431 --> 00:17:15,232
I hate to be the
one to say this,
436
00:17:15,309 --> 00:17:17,359
but I think the meat in
this sauce has gone off.
437
00:17:17,436 --> 00:17:19,195
It don't taste right
438
00:17:19,271 --> 00:17:20,780
Oh, well actually
it's not meat.
439
00:17:20,856 --> 00:17:23,824
It's seitan permesan.
440
00:17:23,901 --> 00:17:25,168
Satan's what?
441
00:17:25,244 --> 00:17:26,619
No, seitan.
442
00:17:26,695 --> 00:17:28,187
Richard and I are vegans.
443
00:17:28,189 --> 00:17:30,247
That means we don't
consume animal products.
444
00:17:30,324 --> 00:17:32,458
Seitan's a form of wheat
gluten, kind of hard to explain.
445
00:17:32,469 --> 00:17:33,492
Honey?
446
00:17:33,570 --> 00:17:35,586
I think it's very healthy.
447
00:17:35,663 --> 00:17:37,680
I'm sorry, if you don't like
it we can order out, or.
448
00:17:37,757 --> 00:17:40,174
Oh no, we like it
fine, don't we Frank?
449
00:17:40,185 --> 00:17:41,684
Sure.
450
00:17:41,761 --> 00:17:45,554
This is probably the best
damned gluten I've ever tasted.
451
00:17:45,631 --> 00:17:49,266
So, what do you do
there, for a living?
452
00:17:49,343 --> 00:17:50,309
You?
453
00:17:50,386 --> 00:17:52,269
Oh, you can call me dad, son.
454
00:17:52,346 --> 00:17:53,529
Hmm.
455
00:17:53,606 --> 00:17:56,199
Well, I worked at
the rodeo for a spell
456
00:17:56,275 --> 00:17:58,359
till I got tired
of all the bull.
457
00:17:58,435 --> 00:18:00,653
Get it?
458
00:18:00,729 --> 00:18:01,570
Bull?
459
00:18:01,647 --> 00:18:03,322
Rodeo?
460
00:18:03,399 --> 00:18:04,832
That one's so old
it's got a beard.
461
00:18:04,909 --> 00:18:06,617
So do you.
462
00:18:06,694 --> 00:18:10,162
Anyway, after that, I took a
job at the Peekaboo Carnival.
463
00:18:10,239 --> 00:18:11,680
That's where i met your mother.
464
00:18:11,757 --> 00:18:13,833
But lately, I've been
selling a household
465
00:18:13,909 --> 00:18:15,876
pest product door to door.
466
00:18:15,887 --> 00:18:17,378
It's called Scoop.
467
00:18:17,454 --> 00:18:18,805
Good stuff, that.
468
00:18:18,881 --> 00:18:21,757
I got a case of it in the
car if you're interested.
469
00:18:21,834 --> 00:18:22,633
Oh, thank you.
470
00:18:22,710 --> 00:18:24,426
That's very thoughtful.
471
00:18:24,503 --> 00:18:27,304
So y'all planning on making
us grandparents anytime soon?
472
00:18:27,381 --> 00:18:30,233
Well, we have been
discussing that option.
473
00:18:30,309 --> 00:18:32,351
AGNES MANURE: Going to take
more than discussing to get you
474
00:18:32,428 --> 00:18:33,194
knocked up.
475
00:18:35,931 --> 00:18:39,316
Please don't embarrass
me in front of my boy.
476
00:18:39,393 --> 00:18:41,569
In all seriousness,
though, there
477
00:18:41,645 --> 00:18:44,155
are some things you should
know about our medical history
478
00:18:44,231 --> 00:18:47,158
if you're fixing to,
you know, propagate.
479
00:18:47,234 --> 00:18:48,884
What do you mean?
480
00:18:48,886 --> 00:18:49,752
It's just there are
some things that could
481
00:18:49,829 --> 00:18:52,496
get passed on to your young.
482
00:18:52,573 --> 00:18:56,167
I myself suffered from
a bacterial condition
483
00:18:56,243 --> 00:18:58,460
called black foot.
484
00:18:58,537 --> 00:18:59,587
Black foot?
485
00:18:59,663 --> 00:19:00,930
You ever hear
of athlete's foot?
486
00:19:01,007 --> 00:19:02,298
Uh-huh.
487
00:19:02,374 --> 00:19:04,717
It's that times 10.
488
00:19:04,793 --> 00:19:08,387
Is both chronic and incurable.
489
00:19:08,464 --> 00:19:12,558
Aside from that, there
is the shrinking.
490
00:19:12,569 --> 00:19:13,851
Shrinking?
491
00:19:13,928 --> 00:19:15,311
Yes, ma'am.
492
00:19:15,387 --> 00:19:18,647
The Manure men tend
to shrink after 40.
493
00:19:18,724 --> 00:19:21,483
AGNES MANURE: And on my side
you get your mental afflictions
494
00:19:21,560 --> 00:19:23,986
such as Tourette's
syndrome, schizophrenia,
495
00:19:24,063 --> 00:19:26,780
and a rare condition
known as Cokie's disorder.
496
00:19:26,857 --> 00:19:29,992
It's generally
characterized by dementia,
497
00:19:30,069 --> 00:19:32,494
the murder impulse,
and an irrational fear
498
00:19:32,571 --> 00:19:34,830
of natural fibers.
499
00:19:34,907 --> 00:19:37,291
Well, if the Tourette's
syndrome ain't kicked in yet,
500
00:19:37,302 --> 00:19:39,243
you're probably in the clear.
501
00:19:39,320 --> 00:19:42,838
But, I'd still keep an eye
out Cokie, if I was you.
502
00:19:42,915 --> 00:19:44,798
FRANK MANURE: We want
you to know, son,
503
00:19:44,875 --> 00:19:48,260
it's our greatest shame that
we weren't there to raise you.
504
00:19:48,337 --> 00:19:52,348
But we intend to spend
the rest of our lives
505
00:19:52,424 --> 00:19:54,516
making it up to you.
506
00:19:54,593 --> 00:19:55,851
You really don't have to.
507
00:19:55,928 --> 00:19:56,852
Oh, no.
508
00:19:56,929 --> 00:19:58,446
We insist.
509
00:20:07,314 --> 00:20:08,289
You're not losing your hair.
510
00:20:13,737 --> 00:20:15,955
Doc, you want to talk about it?
511
00:20:15,965 --> 00:20:17,414
Talk about what?
512
00:20:17,491 --> 00:20:18,216
Oh, I'm fine.
513
00:20:22,037 --> 00:20:23,221
Let's just go to sleep.
514
00:20:28,719 --> 00:20:30,527
let me put it this way.
515
00:20:30,604 --> 00:20:32,304
It's two days, and then you
never have to see them again.
516
00:20:32,381 --> 00:20:33,389
Yeah.
517
00:20:33,465 --> 00:20:34,232
Yeah.
518
00:20:39,763 --> 00:20:40,988
Well, that's better.
519
00:20:58,532 --> 00:21:00,040
[mattress squeaking]
520
00:21:00,117 --> 00:21:02,584
You have got to be kidding me.
521
00:21:02,661 --> 00:21:05,846
[people moaning]
522
00:21:07,624 --> 00:21:08,590
FRANK MANURE: Who's your daddy?
523
00:21:08,667 --> 00:21:09,633
Who's your daddy?
524
00:21:09,710 --> 00:21:11,769
I sail on a sea of serenity.
525
00:21:19,887 --> 00:21:23,739
[hair dryer blowing]
526
00:21:26,485 --> 00:21:27,818
Morning, son.
527
00:21:27,895 --> 00:21:29,445
Sleep well?
528
00:21:29,521 --> 00:21:30,404
Yeah.
529
00:21:30,415 --> 00:21:32,114
Great.
530
00:21:32,191 --> 00:21:33,457
See you at breakfast.
531
00:21:51,811 --> 00:21:53,686
Did you see my tube
off-- oh, well there it is.
532
00:22:00,427 --> 00:22:01,385
What are you doing over there?
533
00:22:03,931 --> 00:22:05,397
I'm a Manure.
534
00:22:05,474 --> 00:22:06,899
No, you're not, honey.
535
00:22:06,975 --> 00:22:08,108
Yes I am.
536
00:22:08,185 --> 00:22:09,785
I am a Manure.
537
00:22:09,787 --> 00:22:11,445
No, you're a talented,
intelligent man.
538
00:22:11,522 --> 00:22:12,621
It doesn't matter
where you came from.
539
00:22:15,692 --> 00:22:18,994
I'm sure they have many
wonderful qualities that have
540
00:22:19,071 --> 00:22:21,372
just yet to reveal themselves.
541
00:22:21,448 --> 00:22:23,165
But what are we going
to do about this party?
542
00:22:23,176 --> 00:22:25,751
I mean, I told everybody
that we had a big surprise.
543
00:22:25,828 --> 00:22:28,712
I can't introduce these
people to everyone we know?
544
00:22:28,789 --> 00:22:29,755
Good god.
545
00:22:29,832 --> 00:22:30,765
Mitch would have a field day.
546
00:22:36,046 --> 00:22:38,597
Oh, would you look
at them critters?
547
00:22:38,674 --> 00:22:40,024
Those two are humping?
548
00:22:43,178 --> 00:22:44,520
Look at that!
549
00:22:44,596 --> 00:22:45,437
Look at them go.
550
00:22:45,514 --> 00:22:47,106
Hey, that reminds me.
551
00:22:47,182 --> 00:22:48,783
Where's that pretty
little gal of yours?
552
00:22:48,859 --> 00:22:49,775
Oh, Ellen?
553
00:22:49,852 --> 00:22:51,610
She's out running an errand.
554
00:22:51,687 --> 00:22:53,445
I think she should
be back any minute.
555
00:22:53,522 --> 00:22:54,488
[chimps playing]
556
00:22:54,565 --> 00:22:55,122
Going at it.
557
00:22:57,776 --> 00:22:59,451
Hi.
558
00:22:59,528 --> 00:23:02,004
Can I have 2 tickets to the
Midsummer Night's Smackdown
559
00:23:02,081 --> 00:23:03,923
The Rosemont Horizon please?
560
00:23:08,120 --> 00:23:11,597
[dolphin sounds]
561
00:23:12,916 --> 00:23:16,218
Junior, what are
we listening to?
562
00:23:16,295 --> 00:23:18,053
"The Sea of Serenity" a
meditation tape that helps him
563
00:23:18,130 --> 00:23:18,896
relax.
564
00:23:23,677 --> 00:23:26,186
So, we have a little
surprise for you two.
565
00:23:26,263 --> 00:23:27,104
Oh, yeah.
566
00:23:27,181 --> 00:23:28,763
For us?
567
00:23:28,841 --> 00:23:30,098
Well, we didn't really
know if you'd be interested,
568
00:23:30,176 --> 00:23:31,692
but there's a big
wrestling event going on.
569
00:23:31,768 --> 00:23:33,911
It's the Midsummer
Night's Smackdown.
570
00:23:33,988 --> 00:23:35,195
Midsummer Night's Smackdown.
571
00:23:35,272 --> 00:23:36,655
Yes.
572
00:23:36,666 --> 00:23:37,848
And well, we went
ahead and got tickets.
573
00:23:40,861 --> 00:23:43,036
How'd you know we
was wrestling fans?
574
00:23:43,047 --> 00:23:44,955
Who isn't?
575
00:23:45,032 --> 00:23:46,748
FRANK MANURE: Maybe
it runs in the family.
576
00:23:46,825 --> 00:23:49,835
So the show time is at
8:00, and we'll get you a map
577
00:23:49,912 --> 00:23:51,261
when we get home I'll go--
578
00:23:51,339 --> 00:23:52,754
You're going to come
with us, ain't you?
579
00:23:52,831 --> 00:23:53,881
Well we'd love to.
580
00:23:53,957 --> 00:23:54,798
We're not able to.
581
00:23:54,875 --> 00:23:56,058
We wish we could.
582
00:23:56,135 --> 00:23:59,761
There's this-- it's
like a meeting thing.
583
00:23:59,838 --> 00:24:01,129
You wouldn't want to be here.
584
00:24:01,207 --> 00:24:03,232
It's a lot of small
talk and schmoozing--
585
00:24:03,309 --> 00:24:05,601
Well, I don't mind schmoozing.
586
00:24:05,677 --> 00:24:07,069
I grew up on a farm.
587
00:24:07,146 --> 00:24:09,938
FRANK MANURE: It's just that
we only have the weekend,
588
00:24:10,015 --> 00:24:12,232
and we was hoping
to kind of maximize
589
00:24:12,309 --> 00:24:14,193
our quality time together.
590
00:24:14,203 --> 00:24:16,236
Yeah, but this is
just a couple of hours.
591
00:24:16,313 --> 00:24:17,263
I think.
592
00:24:17,339 --> 00:24:18,038
A couple of hours, right?
593
00:24:34,081 --> 00:24:35,797
You OK, mom?
594
00:24:35,874 --> 00:24:36,965
You look bored.
595
00:24:37,042 --> 00:24:38,884
This place is
like a funeral home.
596
00:24:38,895 --> 00:24:41,136
I thought you said
it would be casual.
597
00:24:41,213 --> 00:24:42,730
Well, for these
people it is casual.
598
00:24:49,805 --> 00:24:52,105
[rock music playing]
599
00:24:52,116 --> 00:24:55,034
Grab his shorts!
600
00:24:55,110 --> 00:24:56,652
AGNES MANURE: Woo!
601
00:24:56,728 --> 00:24:57,953
We should call them.
602
00:25:01,066 --> 00:25:03,534
Hey!
603
00:25:03,544 --> 00:25:05,619
Hey!
604
00:25:05,696 --> 00:25:07,037
What?
605
00:25:07,114 --> 00:25:08,080
Darling, I'm a little
bit worried about the time.
606
00:25:08,156 --> 00:25:09,739
It's getting late.
607
00:25:09,817 --> 00:25:10,925
Relax, it's a long program.
We have plenty of time.
608
00:25:11,001 --> 00:25:12,234
We should try to
speed things along.
609
00:25:12,311 --> 00:25:15,254
I mean, don't these
people have homes?
610
00:25:15,330 --> 00:25:16,880
Oh, dear.
611
00:25:16,957 --> 00:25:18,140
Do you happen to
know what your mother
612
00:25:18,217 --> 00:25:20,217
plans to wear for the wedding?
613
00:25:20,294 --> 00:25:21,134
No, I don't.
614
00:25:21,211 --> 00:25:23,178
Why do you ask?
615
00:25:23,255 --> 00:25:27,266
There surely must be something
in her closet with sequins?
616
00:25:27,342 --> 00:25:29,184
Well, Mrs Clayton, if you
feel so strongly about it,
617
00:25:29,261 --> 00:25:30,778
why don't you ask her yourself?
618
00:25:30,854 --> 00:25:32,062
Well, that there's no
need to be defensive, dear.
619
00:25:32,139 --> 00:25:34,156
I was just making
a suggestion.
620
00:25:34,233 --> 00:25:36,066
Excuse me.
621
00:25:36,143 --> 00:25:38,160
DOUG CLAYTON: So, Richard.
622
00:25:38,237 --> 00:25:42,698
What was this big surprise
that you promised us tonight?
623
00:25:42,774 --> 00:25:43,907
Big surprise?
624
00:25:43,984 --> 00:25:44,950
Yeah.
625
00:25:44,961 --> 00:25:45,834
You said you had a big surprise.
626
00:25:49,790 --> 00:25:51,623
We're having a baby.
627
00:25:51,700 --> 00:25:53,875
[gasping]
628
00:25:53,952 --> 00:25:55,377
What?
629
00:25:55,388 --> 00:25:56,428
Not now.
630
00:25:56,505 --> 00:25:57,879
But she's not pregnant.
631
00:25:57,956 --> 00:25:59,214
But we will.
632
00:25:59,291 --> 00:26:01,883
She will be, someday.
633
00:26:01,960 --> 00:26:04,803
Maybe tonight, who knows?
634
00:26:04,880 --> 00:26:08,065
[nervous laughter]
635
00:26:08,142 --> 00:26:11,810
DOUG CLAYTON: So,
who's up for charades?
636
00:26:11,887 --> 00:26:13,687
RICHARD CLAYTON: Charades--
dad it's kind of late.
637
00:26:13,698 --> 00:26:15,698
Oh, it's not even 9 o'clock.
638
00:26:15,774 --> 00:26:19,276
Let's play, let's play.
639
00:26:19,353 --> 00:26:22,121
[screeching car]
640
00:26:23,190 --> 00:26:26,116
What the hell is this?
641
00:26:26,193 --> 00:26:27,659
[backfiring]
642
00:26:27,670 --> 00:26:28,693
She got knobs on her?
643
00:26:28,771 --> 00:26:30,713
I was just being friendly.
644
00:26:30,789 --> 00:26:32,914
You know, you've been pushing
my buttons all day long.
645
00:26:32,991 --> 00:26:34,216
Really?
Well, where's the off button?
646
00:26:34,293 --> 00:26:35,384
There ain't no off button.
647
00:26:35,461 --> 00:26:36,960
I'm going to keep going.
648
00:26:37,037 --> 00:26:38,053
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
649
00:26:38,130 --> 00:26:39,129
I don't know what
you're selling.
650
00:26:39,206 --> 00:26:40,881
But there's no peddling here.
651
00:26:40,957 --> 00:26:43,133
Oh, we're not selling
anything, young man.
652
00:26:43,210 --> 00:26:45,218
We just come here
to visit our son.
653
00:26:45,295 --> 00:26:46,845
Your son?
654
00:26:46,922 --> 00:26:48,430
Richard Clayton lives here.
655
00:26:48,507 --> 00:26:51,141
That's-- that's our boy.
656
00:26:51,218 --> 00:26:54,686
Frank junior.
- You mean you're--
657
00:26:54,763 --> 00:26:56,188
We're his parents.
658
00:26:56,264 --> 00:26:59,107
Can't you see the resemblance?
659
00:26:59,184 --> 00:27:00,025
Yes.
660
00:27:00,102 --> 00:27:01,276
Of course.
661
00:27:01,353 --> 00:27:04,237
Hi, I'm Mitchell, Richard's--
662
00:27:04,248 --> 00:27:06,665
Frank Junior's adopted brother.
663
00:27:06,742 --> 00:27:08,909
Oh, why didn't you say no.
664
00:27:08,985 --> 00:27:09,859
Frank Manure.
665
00:27:09,937 --> 00:27:10,911
This is my wife, Agnes.
666
00:27:10,987 --> 00:27:11,754
How the hell are you?
667
00:27:11,830 --> 00:27:13,121
How the hell are you?
668
00:27:13,198 --> 00:27:14,915
Excuse me, what
was that name again?
669
00:27:14,991 --> 00:27:15,791
Frank.
670
00:27:15,867 --> 00:27:16,958
No, the last name.
671
00:27:17,035 --> 00:27:18,719
Manure.
It's French.
672
00:27:22,999 --> 00:27:23,799
Movie.
673
00:27:23,875 --> 00:27:25,842
Yeah, it's a movie.
674
00:27:25,919 --> 00:27:26,727
Second word.
675
00:27:30,882 --> 00:27:32,107
Terror.
676
00:27:32,184 --> 00:27:33,275
Uh, horror!
677
00:27:33,352 --> 00:27:34,267
Nausea.
678
00:27:34,344 --> 00:27:35,143
Fear.
679
00:27:35,220 --> 00:27:37,979
Is it "Cape Fear"?
680
00:27:38,056 --> 00:27:39,073
It is "Cape Fear."
681
00:27:39,149 --> 00:27:40,232
Yes, I'm hot tonight.
682
00:27:40,308 --> 00:27:41,966
Who's next?
683
00:27:42,044 --> 00:27:43,235
Richard, I always knew
you were number two,
684
00:27:43,311 --> 00:27:45,737
but I never realized
you were number two.
685
00:27:45,814 --> 00:27:46,947
Swish, two points.
686
00:27:47,023 --> 00:27:48,115
Hey, come one.
687
00:27:48,191 --> 00:27:51,952
Richard, who are those people?
688
00:27:52,028 --> 00:27:53,328
Just a couple former
patients of mine.
689
00:27:53,405 --> 00:27:54,287
Schizophrenic delusional.
690
00:27:54,298 --> 00:27:57,299
I'll take care of it.
691
00:27:57,376 --> 00:28:00,803
Well, your mother and her
big mouth goddess for us
692
00:28:00,879 --> 00:28:02,170
thrown out for making a ruckus.
693
00:28:02,247 --> 00:28:03,906
She started mouthing off.
694
00:28:03,908 --> 00:28:05,048
I was just being
friendly to somebody.
695
00:28:05,125 --> 00:28:06,925
Oh, don't give me that line.
696
00:28:06,936 --> 00:28:08,427
You're flirting that usherette.
697
00:28:08,503 --> 00:28:10,762
I refuse to be a
party to your delusion.
698
00:28:10,839 --> 00:28:11,997
Ha.
699
00:28:12,074 --> 00:28:13,824
Can't even trust
you around a plant.
700
00:28:13,900 --> 00:28:16,768
Folks, I'd like to introduce
Richard's very special guests,
701
00:28:16,845 --> 00:28:19,062
his birth parents, the Manures.
702
00:28:19,139 --> 00:28:21,773
It's French, you know.
703
00:28:21,850 --> 00:28:22,800
FRANK MANURE: Merci beaucoup.
704
00:28:22,876 --> 00:28:24,109
How the hell are you?
705
00:28:24,186 --> 00:28:25,318
AGNES MANURE: How
the hell are you?
706
00:28:25,395 --> 00:28:26,737
What have you done?
707
00:28:26,813 --> 00:28:28,621
FRANK MANURE: Well
it's such a pleasure
708
00:28:28,699 --> 00:28:34,035
to meet all you fine friends
of our beloved son, Frank Jr.
709
00:28:34,112 --> 00:28:35,912
That's Richard, Frank
Manure Jr. to all of us.
710
00:28:35,989 --> 00:28:37,623
Yes.
711
00:28:37,699 --> 00:28:39,499
You know, Frank Jr. told us
your was a bunch of stiffs.
712
00:28:39,576 --> 00:28:42,294
But you all seem like
right friendly folks to me?
713
00:28:42,370 --> 00:28:43,804
FRANK MANURE: Damn right.
714
00:28:43,881 --> 00:28:45,756
And any friend of Frank
Jr. is a friend of ours.
715
00:28:45,766 --> 00:28:47,215
By the way, all you
nice people, if you
716
00:28:47,292 --> 00:28:49,551
got any problems with
critters, you just let me know.
717
00:28:49,628 --> 00:28:52,137
I sell a fine
product called Scoot.
718
00:28:52,214 --> 00:28:54,848
It gets rid of your ticks,
your fleas, your cockroaches,
719
00:28:54,925 --> 00:28:55,974
what have you.
720
00:28:56,051 --> 00:28:58,059
Just give me a buzz sometime.
721
00:28:58,136 --> 00:28:59,110
Get it?
722
00:28:59,188 --> 00:29:01,772
Give me a buzz.
723
00:29:01,848 --> 00:29:03,665
MITCH CLAYTON: How
very thoughtful of you.
724
00:29:03,742 --> 00:29:06,067
Now, how would you two like to
meet the nice couple who were
725
00:29:06,144 --> 00:29:08,403
so kind as to raise Frank Jr.?
726
00:29:08,414 --> 00:29:10,030
Oh, nothing would
please us more.
727
00:29:10,106 --> 00:29:10,947
MITCH CLAYTON: Excellent.
728
00:29:11,024 --> 00:29:12,407
Mom, dad?
729
00:29:12,484 --> 00:29:13,876
This is Frank and Agnes.
730
00:29:13,952 --> 00:29:18,163
Meet Douglas and Arleen Clayton.
731
00:29:18,174 --> 00:29:20,290
Oh!
732
00:29:20,367 --> 00:29:24,961
I want to thank you on behalf
of myself and my wife and I
733
00:29:25,038 --> 00:29:28,548
for doing such a great
job with Frank Jr.
734
00:29:28,625 --> 00:29:30,133
Oh, we just love him to death.
735
00:29:30,210 --> 00:29:32,385
Ah, he is a fine
Christian man.
736
00:29:32,396 --> 00:29:34,012
Yes, sir.
737
00:29:34,089 --> 00:29:36,398
I myself am from the church
of C and E. Go ahead,
738
00:29:36,475 --> 00:29:38,525
ask me for what that stands for.
739
00:29:38,602 --> 00:29:40,194
C and E. Ask me
what it stands for.
740
00:29:42,973 --> 00:29:43,905
All right.
741
00:29:43,907 --> 00:29:45,315
What does it stand for?
742
00:29:45,392 --> 00:29:47,275
Christmas and Easter.
743
00:29:47,352 --> 00:29:48,819
Get it.
744
00:29:48,895 --> 00:29:52,030
The Church of C and E
is Christmas and Easter.
745
00:29:52,107 --> 00:29:53,323
That's an old joke.
746
00:29:53,400 --> 00:29:54,991
So's your face.
747
00:29:55,068 --> 00:29:57,953
Hey Clayton, how about a swap?
748
00:29:58,029 --> 00:30:00,080
She may have a few
miles on her, but she
749
00:30:00,156 --> 00:30:02,925
gets you where you want to go!
750
00:30:03,001 --> 00:30:05,126
Does Arleen get you
where you want to go?
751
00:30:05,203 --> 00:30:07,629
I'll bet she does,
you old devil.
752
00:30:07,640 --> 00:30:12,092
She looks like she's got
some great suspension.
753
00:30:12,168 --> 00:30:14,845
Uh, guys, this is Angela
Minnola, Ellen's mother.
754
00:30:14,921 --> 00:30:17,231
Angela, the Manures.
755
00:30:17,307 --> 00:30:18,932
Oh, what a pleasure.
756
00:30:18,943 --> 00:30:20,308
I love your dress.
757
00:30:20,385 --> 00:30:21,651
Why, thank you.
758
00:30:21,729 --> 00:30:24,020
So when is that wedding
happening, anyway?
759
00:30:24,097 --> 00:30:25,647
Oh, we should probably
get back to the game, right?
760
00:30:25,724 --> 00:30:26,949
Who's up?
761
00:30:27,025 --> 00:30:28,450
Oh, are you folks
playing a game?
762
00:30:28,527 --> 00:30:30,026
Yes, we were just
playing charades.
763
00:30:30,103 --> 00:30:32,237
You must join us.
764
00:30:32,314 --> 00:30:34,155
Hell, yeah.
765
00:30:34,232 --> 00:30:35,365
DOUG CLAYTON: All righty then.
766
00:30:35,442 --> 00:30:36,366
Prepare, people.
767
00:30:36,443 --> 00:30:37,376
I'm an expert at this game.
768
00:30:44,409 --> 00:30:45,542
A movie.
769
00:30:45,619 --> 00:30:47,502
"Mother, Jugs, and Speed?"
770
00:30:47,579 --> 00:30:49,045
Is it "Mother, Jugs, and Speed?"
771
00:30:49,122 --> 00:30:50,547
AGNES MANURE: Will you
let the man get started?
772
00:30:50,558 --> 00:30:51,431
Will you shut the hell up?
773
00:30:56,504 --> 00:30:57,637
One, "Rocket One."
774
00:30:57,714 --> 00:30:59,180
"How The West Was Won."
775
00:30:59,257 --> 00:31:02,058
First word.
776
00:31:02,135 --> 00:31:02,985
The.
777
00:31:03,061 --> 00:31:03,944
First word!
778
00:31:04,021 --> 00:31:05,353
Is that the first word?
779
00:31:05,430 --> 00:31:07,406
That's the first word is the.
780
00:31:12,020 --> 00:31:15,113
"From Here To Eternity."
781
00:31:15,190 --> 00:31:16,364
Listening?
782
00:31:16,441 --> 00:31:17,282
Listening?
783
00:31:17,359 --> 00:31:18,332
Is it listening?
784
00:31:18,410 --> 00:31:19,200
Is it sound?
785
00:31:19,277 --> 00:31:20,160
Sound.
786
00:31:20,236 --> 00:31:21,202
"Mother, Jugs, and Speed?"
787
00:31:21,279 --> 00:31:22,954
Is it "Mother, Jugs, and Speed."
788
00:31:23,031 --> 00:31:23,896
No, no.
789
00:31:23,974 --> 00:31:24,773
"American Gigolo."
790
00:31:24,850 --> 00:31:26,291
Oh, we saw that at the drive in.
791
00:31:26,302 --> 00:31:27,208
Whoa.
792
00:31:27,285 --> 00:31:28,376
That Richard Gere.
793
00:31:28,453 --> 00:31:29,544
Oh he's, hot to trot.
794
00:31:29,621 --> 00:31:32,005
[panting]
795
00:31:32,016 --> 00:31:34,466
We are trying to play an
intelligent game here, woman.
796
00:31:34,542 --> 00:31:36,101
Wel then, maybe you
should leave the room?
797
00:31:39,464 --> 00:31:42,024
A little word.
798
00:31:42,100 --> 00:31:43,516
Of.
799
00:31:43,593 --> 00:31:44,568
Oh, that was very nice.
800
00:31:48,014 --> 00:31:48,688
Yentl.
801
00:31:48,699 --> 00:31:49,573
Is it Yentl?
802
00:31:52,602 --> 00:31:55,695
I think it's the
fourth word, Frank.
803
00:31:55,772 --> 00:31:56,755
OK, fourth word.
804
00:31:59,484 --> 00:32:01,001
What the hell is he doing now?
805
00:32:04,322 --> 00:32:06,247
"Seven Year Itch."
806
00:32:06,324 --> 00:32:07,090
What is?
807
00:32:12,631 --> 00:32:15,256
He's holding his hands out.
808
00:32:15,333 --> 00:32:16,132
Chest!
809
00:32:16,209 --> 00:32:17,550
Chest!
810
00:32:17,561 --> 00:32:18,510
Jugs!
811
00:32:18,586 --> 00:32:19,970
"Mother, Jugs, and Speed!"
812
00:32:20,046 --> 00:32:21,262
It is not "Mother,
Jugs, and Speed!"
813
00:32:21,339 --> 00:32:23,598
God!
814
00:32:23,675 --> 00:32:25,016
Clayton.
815
00:32:25,093 --> 00:32:27,069
Excuse me, how do
you expect us to get
816
00:32:27,145 --> 00:32:30,238
an answer with the quality of
the clues you're giving us?
817
00:32:30,315 --> 00:32:31,840
I don't want to be
the one to say this,
818
00:32:31,917 --> 00:32:34,234
but I don't think you're
cut out for this game.
819
00:32:34,310 --> 00:32:36,578
AGNES MANURE: Oh, don't be
so hard on the man, Frank.
820
00:32:36,655 --> 00:32:38,455
I mean, some people just
don't have the aptitude
821
00:32:38,532 --> 00:32:39,698
for this sort of thing.
822
00:32:39,774 --> 00:32:41,741
This is ridiculous.
823
00:32:41,818 --> 00:32:45,453
You sir are an ass.
824
00:32:45,530 --> 00:32:51,626
Richard, I hope you will
enjoy your real parents.
825
00:32:51,703 --> 00:32:52,469
My dear.
826
00:32:55,832 --> 00:32:58,508
Real nice party, Richard.
827
00:32:58,585 --> 00:32:59,467
[door slams]
828
00:32:59,544 --> 00:33:01,302
Whose turn is it?
829
00:33:01,379 --> 00:33:03,221
You're dumb as a
shovel, ain't you?
830
00:33:03,232 --> 00:33:07,308
You know, Richard things are
rarely as bad as they seem,
831
00:33:07,319 --> 00:33:10,020
which makes tonight so unique.
832
00:33:10,096 --> 00:33:11,396
Goodnight.
833
00:33:11,407 --> 00:33:12,280
Goodnight.
834
00:33:16,120 --> 00:33:17,077
FRANK MANURE:
"Leaven Las Vegas."
835
00:33:22,617 --> 00:33:23,742
Well, guys.
836
00:33:23,818 --> 00:33:26,661
I guess this is it.
837
00:33:26,738 --> 00:33:29,372
We really hate to leave.
838
00:33:29,449 --> 00:33:32,333
But I guess we'll
see if the wedding.
839
00:33:32,410 --> 00:33:34,294
Hey, you never
told us the date.
840
00:33:34,370 --> 00:33:35,661
Oh, didn't I?
841
00:33:35,739 --> 00:33:37,639
Well, that's all going
to be in the invitation.
842
00:33:37,716 --> 00:33:38,590
Oh.
843
00:33:38,666 --> 00:33:40,258
Good, good.
844
00:33:40,335 --> 00:33:43,219
Son, I can't tell you
how proud we are of you.
845
00:33:43,296 --> 00:33:44,471
OK.
846
00:33:44,548 --> 00:33:46,723
We are so proud of you.
847
00:33:46,800 --> 00:33:49,559
You are a fine, fine man.
848
00:33:49,636 --> 00:33:52,645
And Ellen, we never
had a daughter.
849
00:33:52,722 --> 00:33:56,274
But we feel like we got one now.
850
00:33:56,351 --> 00:33:57,325
Thank you.
851
00:33:57,402 --> 00:33:59,069
That's very sweet.
852
00:33:59,145 --> 00:34:01,279
Yeah, the traffic really
backs up right about now.
853
00:34:01,356 --> 00:34:05,450
I can honestly say
that this has been
854
00:34:05,527 --> 00:34:08,670
the best two days of our lives.
855
00:34:08,747 --> 00:34:11,456
We may have only spent
a weekend together,
856
00:34:11,467 --> 00:34:13,467
but we've loved a lifetime.
857
00:34:13,543 --> 00:34:15,502
[agnes sobbing]
858
00:34:15,578 --> 00:34:17,054
RICHARD CLAYTON: Yeah,
it feels that way.
859
00:34:20,759 --> 00:34:23,259
Now, you know you all
can come can visit us.
860
00:34:23,336 --> 00:34:27,481
I mean, it's only a trailer,
but we'll sleep on the sofa.
861
00:34:27,557 --> 00:34:31,726
I don't think that's
going to be necessary.
862
00:34:31,803 --> 00:34:33,195
Goodbye, y'all.
863
00:34:33,271 --> 00:34:34,145
OK, bye bye.
864
00:34:34,222 --> 00:34:35,697
Bye bye.
865
00:34:35,774 --> 00:34:37,315
WEATHERMAN: Tornado touched
down outside of Pekin, Illinois.
866
00:34:37,392 --> 00:34:39,109
Drive safe.
867
00:34:39,185 --> 00:34:40,193
WEATHERMAN: It looks the worst
to hit our area in many years.
868
00:34:40,270 --> 00:34:41,820
- Did he say Pekin?
- Uh, no.
869
00:34:41,896 --> 00:34:42,704
No, he didn't.
870
00:34:42,781 --> 00:34:44,239
Drive carefully.
871
00:34:44,315 --> 00:34:45,448
WEATHERMAN: The tornado
touched down just
872
00:34:45,525 --> 00:34:47,158
outside Pekin, Illinois.
873
00:34:47,235 --> 00:34:50,712
It looks like the worst one
to hit this area in years.
874
00:34:50,789 --> 00:34:52,163
We are still waiting
for information--
875
00:34:52,174 --> 00:34:53,748
That's our park!
876
00:34:53,825 --> 00:34:56,167
That's where we live.
877
00:34:56,244 --> 00:34:57,710
There's our sofa!
878
00:34:57,787 --> 00:34:58,661
Where?
879
00:34:58,739 --> 00:35:00,222
Up in that tree.
880
00:35:00,298 --> 00:35:02,632
AGNES MANURE: Everything
we own is in that trailer?
881
00:35:02,709 --> 00:35:05,176
Everything in the world!
882
00:35:05,253 --> 00:35:06,761
Gone with the wind.
883
00:35:06,838 --> 00:35:08,805
Well, you know the Dan
Ryan really does start
884
00:35:08,882 --> 00:35:10,682
to lock up at about 5:30, so--
885
00:35:10,758 --> 00:35:11,858
Richard.
886
00:35:11,935 --> 00:35:14,769
We have no home to go to, son.
887
00:35:14,846 --> 00:35:16,187
That's it.
- Oh, god.
888
00:35:16,264 --> 00:35:17,063
This is awful.
889
00:35:17,140 --> 00:35:18,648
I hope you're insured.
890
00:35:18,725 --> 00:35:19,607
Oh.
891
00:35:19,684 --> 00:35:21,526
No, I'm afraid not.
892
00:35:21,537 --> 00:35:22,819
We ain't even
got a bank account.
893
00:35:22,896 --> 00:35:24,538
I don't believe in insurance.
894
00:35:24,614 --> 00:35:26,531
And I don't trust
nobody with our money,
895
00:35:26,608 --> 00:35:28,533
I kept it all in the home.
896
00:35:28,610 --> 00:35:31,828
Not to mention 50
cases of Scoot!
897
00:35:31,905 --> 00:35:33,163
Oh, Lord!
898
00:35:33,239 --> 00:35:35,623
Why should this
tragedy befall us?
899
00:35:35,700 --> 00:35:37,551
AGNES MANURE: What's
going to become of us?
900
00:35:37,627 --> 00:35:38,918
Is there anyone
you can stay with?
901
00:35:38,995 --> 00:35:40,461
Maybe a neighbor?
902
00:35:40,538 --> 00:35:42,213
It's the streets for us.
903
00:35:42,290 --> 00:35:43,673
But we'll get by.
904
00:35:43,750 --> 00:35:47,427
We've been in tougher scrapes
than this before, honey.
905
00:35:47,503 --> 00:35:49,470
AGNES MANURE: I don't think
I can through being homeless.
906
00:35:49,547 --> 00:35:52,432
I can't.
907
00:35:52,508 --> 00:35:55,351
Not at my age.
908
00:35:55,428 --> 00:35:57,645
Richard.
909
00:35:57,722 --> 00:36:00,815
Richard, can I speak
to you for a moment?
910
00:36:00,892 --> 00:36:01,658
OK.
911
00:36:07,315 --> 00:36:08,165
We've got to do something.
912
00:36:08,241 --> 00:36:09,657
Come on, Ellen!
913
00:36:09,734 --> 00:36:10,700
I did my part.
914
00:36:10,777 --> 00:36:11,659
I did the weekend.
915
00:36:11,736 --> 00:36:12,735
I saw it through.
916
00:36:12,812 --> 00:36:13,828
I want my life back.
917
00:36:13,905 --> 00:36:15,288
What are they supposed to do?
918
00:36:15,365 --> 00:36:16,664
Why can't they
live in their car?
919
00:36:16,741 --> 00:36:17,999
They live in a trailer home.
920
00:36:18,076 --> 00:36:19,834
That's like a big car.
921
00:36:19,911 --> 00:36:21,419
I cannot believe you.
922
00:36:21,496 --> 00:36:22,629
What?
923
00:36:22,705 --> 00:36:25,590
You are being
completely heartless.
924
00:36:25,601 --> 00:36:27,300
I mean, you are the one
who's always speaking out
925
00:36:27,311 --> 00:36:28,776
on the plight of
those less fortunate,
926
00:36:28,853 --> 00:36:29,969
and now you're ready to
turn your own parents out
927
00:36:29,980 --> 00:36:31,012
on the street?
928
00:36:31,089 --> 00:36:31,971
Please stop calling them that.
929
00:36:32,048 --> 00:36:33,373
OK, OK.
930
00:36:33,375 --> 00:36:34,624
I know they're a
little obnoxious,
931
00:36:34,701 --> 00:36:36,643
but they really do
seem to care about you
932
00:36:36,719 --> 00:36:38,320
unconditionally, which
is a lot more than I
933
00:36:38,396 --> 00:36:40,179
can say for Doug and Arleen.
934
00:36:40,256 --> 00:36:41,773
Wait a minute here, Doug and
Arleen Clayton are good people.
935
00:36:41,849 --> 00:36:42,782
They're fine people.
936
00:36:42,859 --> 00:36:44,125
They may be a tad conservative.
937
00:36:44,127 --> 00:36:45,860
But they're fine people.
- Uh-huh.
938
00:36:45,937 --> 00:36:47,695
Ellen, the wedding
is in two weeks.
939
00:36:47,772 --> 00:36:49,447
This is the worst
possible time for this.
940
00:36:49,524 --> 00:36:50,990
It will only be a few days.
941
00:36:51,067 --> 00:36:52,375
The wedding is all set to go.
942
00:36:52,452 --> 00:36:54,869
Come on, Richard.
943
00:36:54,946 --> 00:36:56,579
Richard, you know this
is the right thing to do.
944
00:36:56,656 --> 00:36:57,455
Hmm?
945
00:37:00,660 --> 00:37:01,426
Right?
946
00:37:05,957 --> 00:37:08,892
Uh, folks, Richard has something
you'd like to tell you.
947
00:37:14,090 --> 00:37:15,565
Ellen and I just
want you to know
948
00:37:15,642 --> 00:37:18,518
that you're welcome to
stay here for a few days.
949
00:37:18,594 --> 00:37:19,769
Although if that makes
you uncomfortable,
950
00:37:19,846 --> 00:37:21,854
then we completely understand.
951
00:37:21,931 --> 00:37:25,316
What can I say, son?
952
00:37:25,393 --> 00:37:27,418
You've rescued us
in our hour of need.
953
00:37:30,773 --> 00:37:35,743
I guess family is the most
important bond of all.
954
00:37:35,820 --> 00:37:38,421
Nothing on Earth is more
important than family.
955
00:37:42,827 --> 00:37:43,960
OK.
956
00:37:44,037 --> 00:37:44,803
FRANK MANURE: Oh my.
957
00:37:52,920 --> 00:37:54,437
I'm so full of emotion.
958
00:37:54,514 --> 00:37:56,014
So then you're not
uncomfortable with this at all
959
00:37:56,090 --> 00:37:57,098
then, no.
960
00:37:57,175 --> 00:37:59,359
No. this is so good.
961
00:38:03,639 --> 00:38:04,772
Honey, I found
these in the garage.
962
00:38:04,783 --> 00:38:06,357
They'll help you sleep.
963
00:38:06,434 --> 00:38:09,027
No, I refuse to wear
earplugs in my own house.
964
00:38:09,103 --> 00:38:10,820
[distant moaning]
965
00:38:10,897 --> 00:38:12,204
Well, I'll say
one thing for them.
966
00:38:12,282 --> 00:38:13,614
It's kind of sweet
to see a couple that
967
00:38:13,691 --> 00:38:14,907
have been together for
so long that are still
968
00:38:14,984 --> 00:38:15,917
so attracted to each other.
969
00:38:15,994 --> 00:38:16,993
Sweet?
970
00:38:17,070 --> 00:38:18,453
It's psychotic.
971
00:38:18,463 --> 00:38:19,620
They're completely
oblivious to the effect
972
00:38:19,697 --> 00:38:21,748
that they're having on others.
973
00:38:21,824 --> 00:38:24,959
That's all right, because it's
not getting under my skin.
974
00:38:25,036 --> 00:38:26,428
My feet have been a
little itchy lately.
975
00:38:26,504 --> 00:38:28,129
Do you think it's black foot?
976
00:38:28,206 --> 00:38:29,630
You don't have black foot.
977
00:38:29,707 --> 00:38:31,382
Black foot.
It could be black foot.
978
00:38:31,459 --> 00:38:32,508
Are you a podiatrist?
979
00:38:32,585 --> 00:38:33,642
Stop pacing and
come back to bed.
980
00:38:33,720 --> 00:38:35,470
You're making me nervous.
981
00:38:35,546 --> 00:38:38,514
All right.
982
00:38:38,591 --> 00:38:39,816
AGNES MANURE: Who's my daddy!
983
00:38:57,151 --> 00:38:58,001
Do you mind!
984
00:39:02,740 --> 00:39:04,716
You ain't got nothing
I ain't seen before.
985
00:39:09,914 --> 00:39:13,591
Except a brain.
986
00:39:13,668 --> 00:39:14,509
Hey, honey.
987
00:39:14,585 --> 00:39:16,594
You OK?
988
00:39:16,671 --> 00:39:18,412
Yeah, yeah.
989
00:39:18,490 --> 00:39:19,889
So do you think they're going
to start looking for a place
990
00:39:19,966 --> 00:39:21,516
today?
- Doc.
991
00:39:21,592 --> 00:39:22,983
Yeah?
992
00:39:23,061 --> 00:39:25,895
Could you at least
try to like them for me?
993
00:39:25,972 --> 00:39:26,821
Of course.
994
00:39:26,898 --> 00:39:28,073
You know me, of course.
995
00:39:30,977 --> 00:39:34,153
Do I look smaller to you?
996
00:39:34,230 --> 00:39:35,988
[coughing]
997
00:39:36,065 --> 00:39:37,824
If you get a chance, just
remind her that there's
998
00:39:37,900 --> 00:39:41,077
no smoking in the house.
999
00:39:41,154 --> 00:39:43,663
FRANK MANURE: Where you
running off to, son?
1000
00:39:43,739 --> 00:39:44,872
Nowhere, nowhere.
1001
00:39:44,949 --> 00:39:47,458
Just-- I've got some
business in town.
1002
00:39:47,535 --> 00:39:50,128
Want to toss the
ball around a little?
1003
00:39:50,204 --> 00:39:51,546
No.
1004
00:39:51,622 --> 00:39:53,506
I mean, I would love
to, but I really--
1005
00:39:53,517 --> 00:39:55,091
I am running late as it is.
1006
00:39:55,168 --> 00:39:57,718
Oh, come on so.
1007
00:39:57,795 --> 00:40:00,930
All my life I dreamed about
tossing the pigskin around
1008
00:40:01,007 --> 00:40:03,474
on the lawn with my only son.
1009
00:40:03,551 --> 00:40:04,809
Huh.
1010
00:40:04,886 --> 00:40:06,978
Well, I can't, Frank.
1011
00:40:07,054 --> 00:40:08,020
I really can't.
1012
00:40:08,097 --> 00:40:10,690
I've got a bad shoulder, too.
1013
00:40:10,766 --> 00:40:12,942
You know, I dislocated
it once playing lacrosse.
1014
00:40:13,019 --> 00:40:14,569
That's no big deal.
1015
00:40:14,579 --> 00:40:18,739
I have bad knees, a bad
back, got a bad heart.
1016
00:40:18,816 --> 00:40:23,202
Come on, let's play a little
catch while I'm still alive.
1017
00:40:23,279 --> 00:40:24,745
I'm in a really good suit.
1018
00:40:24,822 --> 00:40:26,998
Let me just toss
to you one time.
1019
00:40:27,074 --> 00:40:28,550
OK, all right, one time.
1020
00:40:28,626 --> 00:40:30,251
And then I really have to run.
1021
00:40:30,262 --> 00:40:31,586
One time.
1022
00:40:31,662 --> 00:40:32,753
Get the camera!
1023
00:40:32,830 --> 00:40:33,671
Wohoo.
1024
00:40:33,748 --> 00:40:35,047
Here we go.
1025
00:40:35,058 --> 00:40:38,009
It's a dream come true, son.
1026
00:40:38,085 --> 00:40:41,012
Oh, that's a very fine
watch you got there.
1027
00:40:41,088 --> 00:40:41,929
You must be living right.
1028
00:40:42,006 --> 00:40:42,847
Thank you.
1029
00:40:42,924 --> 00:40:44,015
It was a gift.
1030
00:40:44,091 --> 00:40:45,683
Yes, it's a fine watch.
Fine watch.
1031
00:40:45,760 --> 00:40:47,068
If you ever need another
one, let me know.
1032
00:40:47,145 --> 00:40:48,936
Because I know a guy who
sells them wholesale out
1033
00:40:49,013 --> 00:40:50,521
of the back of his car.
1034
00:40:50,598 --> 00:40:52,198
Come on, let's go, boy.
1035
00:40:52,275 --> 00:40:53,649
All right.
1036
00:40:53,726 --> 00:40:54,826
OK.
1037
00:40:54,903 --> 00:40:56,944
FRANK MANURE: Oh,
looking good son.
1038
00:40:57,021 --> 00:40:58,946
OK.
1039
00:40:58,957 --> 00:40:59,873
Go long, son.
1040
00:40:59,949 --> 00:41:01,491
Go long.
1041
00:41:01,567 --> 00:41:03,877
Oh.
1042
00:41:03,953 --> 00:41:05,119
That was pretty good.
1043
00:41:05,130 --> 00:41:06,954
All right, here we go.
1044
00:41:06,965 --> 00:41:07,881
All right, son.
1045
00:41:07,957 --> 00:41:08,873
[shutter snapping]
1046
00:41:08,950 --> 00:41:10,625
Very nice.
1047
00:41:10,701 --> 00:41:11,885
You do this with Doug?
1048
00:41:11,961 --> 00:41:13,720
Oh, no.
1049
00:41:13,796 --> 00:41:16,631
Doug didn't really like
to get his hands dirty.
1050
00:41:16,707 --> 00:41:18,174
Well stick with me, son.
1051
00:41:18,251 --> 00:41:20,885
My hands is always dirty.
1052
00:41:20,962 --> 00:41:21,886
Hit me hard.
1053
00:41:21,897 --> 00:41:22,845
Come on.
1054
00:41:22,922 --> 00:41:23,763
Come on.
1055
00:41:23,839 --> 00:41:24,972
Right here.
1056
00:41:25,049 --> 00:41:27,266
[crunching sound]
1057
00:41:27,277 --> 00:41:28,109
Oh.
1058
00:41:28,186 --> 00:41:30,645
What happened?
1059
00:41:30,721 --> 00:41:32,188
I think I dislocated
my shoulder.
1060
00:41:32,265 --> 00:41:34,199
Hold still, I'll
pop it back for you.
1061
00:41:34,275 --> 00:41:35,608
No, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no.
1062
00:41:35,619 --> 00:41:36,618
You're not going
to pop anything.
1063
00:41:36,694 --> 00:41:38,069
Trust me.
I can do this.
1064
00:41:38,145 --> 00:41:39,987
I've seen "Lethal
Weapon" 10 times.
1065
00:41:40,064 --> 00:41:40,914
Give me that.
1066
00:41:40,990 --> 00:41:41,915
Pop it.
1067
00:41:41,991 --> 00:41:43,908
He's good at popping it in.
1068
00:41:43,985 --> 00:41:44,825
No, no.
1069
00:41:44,902 --> 00:41:45,743
Frank, no popping.
1070
00:41:45,820 --> 00:41:47,703
No popping!
1071
00:41:47,780 --> 00:41:50,081
Almost got him that time.
1072
00:41:50,157 --> 00:41:51,666
Here we go.
1073
00:41:51,742 --> 00:41:52,625
I'm going to get you.
1074
00:41:52,702 --> 00:41:53,885
I'm going to get you!
1075
00:41:56,956 --> 00:41:59,840
RICHARD CLAYTON:
Stay away from me!
1076
00:41:59,917 --> 00:42:02,260
Do I have more hair
in this picture?
1077
00:42:02,336 --> 00:42:04,136
What?
1078
00:42:04,213 --> 00:42:05,939
Nevermind.
1079
00:42:06,015 --> 00:42:08,766
I just want to thank
you, Dr. Clayton.
1080
00:42:08,843 --> 00:42:11,310
This book really saved my life.
1081
00:42:11,387 --> 00:42:12,687
Could you sign it?
1082
00:42:12,763 --> 00:42:13,530
I'd be honored.
1083
00:42:29,822 --> 00:42:31,214
Well, I can't read this.
1084
00:42:33,701 --> 00:42:34,259
Thank you.
1085
00:42:37,380 --> 00:42:39,839
Richard, are you sure you're
going to be able to do this?
1086
00:42:39,915 --> 00:42:41,591
Yeah, yeah.
1087
00:42:41,667 --> 00:42:42,225
That's my boy.
1088
00:42:55,014 --> 00:42:55,697
Oh, they're done early.
1089
00:42:58,976 --> 00:43:00,860
Since when do you
read "The Star?"
1090
00:43:00,936 --> 00:43:01,810
Oh, it's Agnes'.
1091
00:43:01,888 --> 00:43:04,238
It's very interesting.
1092
00:43:04,315 --> 00:43:06,073
Don't they have
somewhere to go yet?
1093
00:43:06,150 --> 00:43:07,241
I'll gladly pay for a hotel.
1094
00:43:07,318 --> 00:43:08,609
I offered.
1095
00:43:08,686 --> 00:43:09,702
They won't take
any money from us.
1096
00:43:09,779 --> 00:43:10,828
They're very proud.
1097
00:43:10,905 --> 00:43:11,912
Proud?
1098
00:43:11,989 --> 00:43:12,830
What are they proud of?
1099
00:43:12,907 --> 00:43:14,716
200 years of inbreeding?
1100
00:43:14,792 --> 00:43:16,183
They broke my arm.
1101
00:43:16,185 --> 00:43:17,719
My book signing was a disaster.
1102
00:43:17,795 --> 00:43:20,722
They're actually not that
bad once you get to know them.
1103
00:43:20,798 --> 00:43:23,758
In fact, Frank is very
handy around the house.
1104
00:43:23,834 --> 00:43:26,218
Agnes gave me wonderful recipes.
1105
00:43:26,295 --> 00:43:28,220
Recipes for what?
1106
00:43:28,297 --> 00:43:30,723
Pigs feet or possum pie?
1107
00:43:34,178 --> 00:43:38,397
[thunder]
1108
00:43:38,474 --> 00:43:39,624
Hmm.
1109
00:43:39,700 --> 00:43:40,650
Ellen this is delicious.
1110
00:43:40,726 --> 00:43:42,068
What is it?
1111
00:43:42,144 --> 00:43:44,987
Tempo roquette with
a tofu tahini dip.
1112
00:43:45,064 --> 00:43:49,659
Do I have the best wife
in the world or what?
1113
00:43:49,735 --> 00:43:50,752
And that's not all.
1114
00:43:50,828 --> 00:43:52,953
I have a special
surprise for you.
1115
00:43:53,030 --> 00:43:53,904
Surprise?
1116
00:43:53,982 --> 00:43:55,006
I love surprises.
1117
00:44:01,330 --> 00:44:02,922
It's a cheese ball.
1118
00:44:02,998 --> 00:44:05,207
I made it myself
with my own two feet.
1119
00:44:09,046 --> 00:44:11,972
What the hell?
1120
00:44:12,049 --> 00:44:13,933
[laughter]
1121
00:44:14,009 --> 00:44:16,143
No!
1122
00:44:16,220 --> 00:44:20,022
Your father say you're
looking for a rug.
1123
00:44:20,033 --> 00:44:23,693
I can cut you a deal.
1124
00:44:23,769 --> 00:44:24,752
No!
1125
00:44:24,829 --> 00:44:26,237
No, this isn't happening.
1126
00:44:26,313 --> 00:44:28,030
Just shut the hell up!
1127
00:44:28,107 --> 00:44:28,956
Just shut the hell up!
1128
00:44:29,033 --> 00:44:30,241
You're not wife.
1129
00:44:30,317 --> 00:44:31,225
Yes, I am.
1130
00:44:31,227 --> 00:44:32,794
And you're my husband.
1131
00:44:32,870 --> 00:44:33,419
Lookie here.
1132
00:44:39,535 --> 00:44:40,301
Ah!
1133
00:44:45,040 --> 00:44:46,224
Like father, like son!
1134
00:44:52,339 --> 00:44:53,264
No!
1135
00:44:53,340 --> 00:44:54,107
No!
1136
00:44:56,927 --> 00:44:58,185
What's the matter?
1137
00:44:58,262 --> 00:45:02,189
Ain't you hungry?
1138
00:45:02,266 --> 00:45:05,818
Run, honey, run!
1139
00:45:05,895 --> 00:45:06,452
Ah!
1140
00:45:13,569 --> 00:45:15,035
Oh, Ellen.
1141
00:45:15,112 --> 00:45:19,206
I just had the worst dream!
1142
00:45:19,283 --> 00:45:20,049
Ah!
1143
00:45:28,584 --> 00:45:29,759
Son?
1144
00:45:29,835 --> 00:45:30,535
Agnes?
1145
00:45:30,611 --> 00:45:33,220
Are you OK?
1146
00:45:33,297 --> 00:45:34,856
I thought I heard a scream.
1147
00:45:34,932 --> 00:45:35,857
Yeah, I was just--
1148
00:45:35,933 --> 00:45:37,016
I had a nightmare.
1149
00:45:37,092 --> 00:45:38,017
But I'm fine.
1150
00:45:38,093 --> 00:45:40,153
Thank you.
1151
00:45:40,229 --> 00:45:41,103
Oh.
1152
00:45:41,180 --> 00:45:42,021
Don't cry.
1153
00:45:42,097 --> 00:45:43,230
Mommy is here.
1154
00:45:43,307 --> 00:45:44,899
OK
1155
00:45:44,975 --> 00:45:49,236
You know, there was a
lullaby I used to sing to you
1156
00:45:49,313 --> 00:45:50,237
when you were a little baby.
1157
00:45:50,314 --> 00:45:51,630
Uh-huh.
1158
00:45:51,707 --> 00:45:53,824
Would it be OK if
I sang it to you now?
1159
00:45:53,835 --> 00:45:55,367
And you can drift
right off to sleep?
1160
00:45:55,444 --> 00:45:57,036
That's-- that's not necessary.
1161
00:45:57,112 --> 00:45:59,038
I don't--
1162
00:45:59,114 --> 00:46:04,001
(SINGING) Go to
sleep my pride and joy.
1163
00:46:04,078 --> 00:46:05,419
That's very pretty, but--
1164
00:46:05,496 --> 00:46:11,550
Cause you're mama's
those precious boy.
1165
00:46:11,627 --> 00:46:16,514
Little angel, stay in bed.
1166
00:46:16,590 --> 00:46:17,932
OK.
1167
00:46:18,008 --> 00:46:23,020
Happy thoughts
dance in your head.
1168
00:46:23,097 --> 00:46:24,563
Agnes, I'm 34 years old.
1169
00:46:24,640 --> 00:46:26,106
Go to sleep my--
1170
00:46:26,183 --> 00:46:27,024
Thank you, Agnes.
1171
00:46:27,101 --> 00:46:27,983
Thank you.
1172
00:46:28,060 --> 00:46:28,910
Thank you.
1173
00:46:28,986 --> 00:46:29,902
My pride and joy.
1174
00:46:29,979 --> 00:46:30,536
There's another verse?
1175
00:46:36,068 --> 00:46:37,076
Point it toward me.
1176
00:46:37,152 --> 00:46:38,160
- Woo!
- There you go.
1177
00:46:38,237 --> 00:46:39,553
- There we go.
- Right there.
1178
00:46:39,555 --> 00:46:40,621
I'm getting it.
- You happy?
1179
00:46:40,698 --> 00:46:41,923
Ellen, have you seen my watch?
1180
00:46:41,999 --> 00:46:42,924
What watch?
1181
00:46:43,000 --> 00:46:44,625
My Rolex.
1182
00:46:44,636 --> 00:46:45,543
I can't find it.
1183
00:46:45,619 --> 00:46:47,294
It's just gone.
1184
00:46:47,371 --> 00:46:48,838
Well, when was the
last time you had it?
1185
00:46:48,848 --> 00:46:50,522
Last night.
1186
00:46:50,524 --> 00:46:53,968
I took it off, I put it on the
nightstand like I always do.
1187
00:46:54,044 --> 00:46:55,135
You know what?
1188
00:46:55,212 --> 00:46:56,470
Frank was commenting
on it yesterday.
1189
00:46:56,547 --> 00:46:57,413
Remember that?
1190
00:46:57,490 --> 00:46:58,931
He was admiring it.
1191
00:46:59,008 --> 00:46:59,816
Oh, Richard.
1192
00:46:59,892 --> 00:47:01,225
You can't be serious.
1193
00:47:01,302 --> 00:47:04,311
He stole my watch.
1194
00:47:04,388 --> 00:47:06,480
ELLEN MINNOLA: Do
you honestly think
1195
00:47:06,557 --> 00:47:08,440
that Frank snuck him here
in the middle of the night
1196
00:47:08,517 --> 00:47:09,650
and took your watch?
1197
00:47:09,727 --> 00:47:11,268
Well, I don't know.
1198
00:47:11,346 --> 00:47:13,487
I mean, he does have
a criminal record.
1199
00:47:13,564 --> 00:47:15,114
You have to ask yourself,
what kind of man
1200
00:47:15,190 --> 00:47:17,867
impersonates a meat inspector?
1201
00:47:17,943 --> 00:47:20,494
I've never been a sane
person in your family.
1202
00:47:20,571 --> 00:47:22,255
ELLEN MINNOLA: You
probably just misplaced it.
1203
00:47:22,331 --> 00:47:23,356
No, no, no.
1204
00:47:23,432 --> 00:47:25,499
I didn't misplace it, Ellen.
1205
00:47:25,576 --> 00:47:28,511
My father gave me that
watch, my real father.
1206
00:47:28,588 --> 00:47:31,130
You always told me you
thought it was too flashy.
1207
00:47:31,206 --> 00:47:32,890
That doesn't gives him
the right to steal it.
1208
00:47:36,420 --> 00:47:37,928
Bye, honey.
1209
00:47:38,005 --> 00:47:39,346
Be safe.
1210
00:47:39,423 --> 00:47:40,189
I will.
1211
00:47:56,231 --> 00:47:58,282
Is this the Clayton residence?
1212
00:47:58,293 --> 00:48:00,284
Yes it is, but there
must be some mistake.
1213
00:48:00,295 --> 00:48:01,911
We didn't order any meat.
1214
00:48:01,987 --> 00:48:03,495
Well, someone did.
1215
00:48:03,572 --> 00:48:08,375
Got an order here for
a Franklin Ma-nur-ia?
1216
00:48:08,452 --> 00:48:09,376
Man-rooey?
1217
00:48:09,453 --> 00:48:10,887
[frank shouting]
1218
00:48:10,963 --> 00:48:13,589
My prime rib is here!
1219
00:48:13,666 --> 00:48:15,424
Finally.
- Prime rib?
1220
00:48:15,501 --> 00:48:16,926
Yeah, from the Meat
of the Month club.
1221
00:48:17,002 --> 00:48:18,560
Where you been?
1222
00:48:18,638 --> 00:48:19,345
I've been waiting for
three weeks for this.
1223
00:48:19,421 --> 00:48:20,220
Come on, boy.
Get in there.
1224
00:48:20,297 --> 00:48:21,522
Right in the kitchen.
1225
00:48:21,599 --> 00:48:24,141
Oh, I had to move out
all that satan stuff
1226
00:48:24,218 --> 00:48:26,060
and make some room for it.
1227
00:48:26,136 --> 00:48:27,603
Come on.
1228
00:48:27,680 --> 00:48:30,031
Oh!
1229
00:48:30,107 --> 00:48:31,023
Ready, set.
1230
00:48:31,100 --> 00:48:33,567
Let go.
1231
00:48:33,644 --> 00:48:34,693
Yeah, stick it--
1232
00:48:34,770 --> 00:48:36,487
oh wait.
1233
00:48:36,563 --> 00:48:40,574
Um, Frank you want to see my
Rolex by any chance, have you?
1234
00:48:40,651 --> 00:48:42,451
No, I didn't, son.
1235
00:48:42,528 --> 00:48:43,369
That's good.
1236
00:48:43,445 --> 00:48:44,995
Here, sign here.
1237
00:48:45,072 --> 00:48:46,538
FRANK MANURE: You don't
have another like list
1238
00:48:46,615 --> 00:48:47,665
of meat stuff.
1239
00:48:47,741 --> 00:48:48,707
I'm just going
to be downstairs,
1240
00:48:48,784 --> 00:48:49,967
working on my new book.
1241
00:48:50,044 --> 00:48:51,126
Downstairs in the office.
1242
00:48:51,203 --> 00:48:52,186
Fine.
1243
00:48:52,262 --> 00:48:53,554
I'll catch you next time.
1244
00:49:30,593 --> 00:49:32,501
Woo.
It's hot as a pistol out there.
1245
00:49:32,578 --> 00:49:33,711
Woo.
1246
00:49:33,787 --> 00:49:35,004
I'm sweating like
a whore in church.
1247
00:49:35,080 --> 00:49:36,422
You ain't lying.
1248
00:49:36,498 --> 00:49:39,466
You know, all that suntan
lotion and naked flesh
1249
00:49:39,477 --> 00:49:41,343
gives a man some ideas?
1250
00:49:41,420 --> 00:49:42,703
Oh, yeah.
1251
00:49:42,780 --> 00:49:44,138
What are you getting
at, Franklin Manure?
1252
00:49:44,214 --> 00:49:49,184
I'm going to be getting
at you in a minute.
1253
00:49:49,261 --> 00:49:50,644
[agnes shrieking]
1254
00:49:50,721 --> 00:49:51,720
FRANK MANURE: Woohoo!
1255
00:49:54,183 --> 00:49:55,408
AGNES MANURE: Oh, my, honey!
1256
00:50:04,818 --> 00:50:06,076
Oh, honey!
1257
00:50:06,153 --> 00:50:08,328
[moaning]
1258
00:50:08,405 --> 00:50:09,246
Oh Frank.
1259
00:50:09,323 --> 00:50:10,581
Spank me!
1260
00:50:10,657 --> 00:50:13,500
Take it around a
little, it likes that.
1261
00:50:13,511 --> 00:50:15,586
[moaning]
1262
00:50:15,662 --> 00:50:17,388
FRANK MANURE: Will you stop
making them damn noises?
1263
00:50:17,465 --> 00:50:20,174
AGNES MANURE: Ain't you ever
going to find my g-spot?
1264
00:50:20,250 --> 00:50:23,594
FRANK MANURE: Would you shut the
hell up about your damn g spot?
1265
00:50:23,604 --> 00:50:25,596
AGNES MANURE: I think it's time
to break out the Excalibur.
1266
00:50:25,672 --> 00:50:27,222
FRANK MANURE: The Excalibur?
1267
00:50:27,299 --> 00:50:30,517
AGNES MANURE: Well,
I know I packed it.
1268
00:50:30,594 --> 00:50:32,770
FRANK MANURE: Let me
look through the stuff.
1269
00:50:32,846 --> 00:50:33,729
Just relax.
1270
00:50:33,806 --> 00:50:35,481
Hold on, woman.
1271
00:50:35,557 --> 00:50:37,441
Hold on.
1272
00:50:37,518 --> 00:50:38,358
[buzzing]
1273
00:50:38,369 --> 00:50:40,402
Sounds like buzzing.
1274
00:50:40,479 --> 00:50:41,478
Is that coming from you?
1275
00:50:41,556 --> 00:50:43,197
AGNES MANURE: That's Excalibur.
1276
00:50:43,273 --> 00:50:45,449
I'd know that sound anywhere.
1277
00:50:45,460 --> 00:50:49,787
FRANK MANURE: It's
coming from the closet.
1278
00:50:49,863 --> 00:50:51,747
AGNES MANURE: Frank, I think
there's somebody in there!
1279
00:50:51,824 --> 00:50:53,215
FRANK MANURE: I'll
go take a look.
1280
00:50:57,412 --> 00:50:58,179
Son!
1281
00:51:03,177 --> 00:51:05,469
Son?
1282
00:51:05,546 --> 00:51:06,428
Son?
1283
00:51:06,439 --> 00:51:08,222
You all right?
1284
00:51:08,298 --> 00:51:10,808
If you had any questions about
sex, why don't you just ask?
1285
00:51:10,884 --> 00:51:12,193
I don't want to talk about it.
1286
00:51:12,269 --> 00:51:13,268
You're still our
son no matter what.
1287
00:51:13,345 --> 00:51:14,853
I don't want to talk about it!
1288
00:51:14,864 --> 00:51:16,271
I just want you to
know we understand.
1289
00:51:16,348 --> 00:51:18,232
We're here for you, junior.
1290
00:51:18,308 --> 00:51:19,191
Son?
1291
00:51:19,202 --> 00:51:20,201
Son?
1292
00:51:20,277 --> 00:51:22,611
Your mom and I were concerned.
1293
00:51:22,688 --> 00:51:24,780
You're the pent up type.
1294
00:51:24,857 --> 00:51:26,740
You got in touch
with your emotions.
1295
00:51:26,817 --> 00:51:27,583
Go away!
1296
00:51:47,421 --> 00:51:48,679
ANGELA MINNOLA: It's beautiful.
1297
00:51:48,755 --> 00:51:49,721
It's not going to work.
1298
00:51:49,798 --> 00:51:50,806
Of course it's going to work.
1299
00:51:50,883 --> 00:51:52,191
No, it's not going to work.
1300
00:51:52,268 --> 00:51:53,717
Look how flattered
your waistline is.
1301
00:51:53,794 --> 00:51:55,561
Mom, I'm not talking
about the dress.
1302
00:51:55,637 --> 00:51:56,403
What's the matter?
1303
00:52:00,350 --> 00:52:02,442
I've been reevaluating
things lately.
1304
00:52:02,519 --> 00:52:06,196
Well, that's only
natural, honey.
1305
00:52:06,273 --> 00:52:09,241
This is a very big step
for the two of you.
1306
00:52:09,252 --> 00:52:12,661
I'm just not sure Richard
and I are right for each other.
1307
00:52:12,738 --> 00:52:16,623
Mommy, he always seemed so
tolerant and so compassionate.
1308
00:52:16,700 --> 00:52:17,949
What do you mean seemed?
1309
00:52:18,027 --> 00:52:19,293
Well, I just don't
understand why he's
1310
00:52:19,369 --> 00:52:21,461
so hard on Frank and Agnes.
1311
00:52:21,538 --> 00:52:22,863
I mean, I know they're
coarse, and they
1312
00:52:22,940 --> 00:52:24,882
can come across a little
too strong sometimes.
1313
00:52:24,958 --> 00:52:29,761
But I don't know, it seems like
he wrote them off from day one.
1314
00:52:29,838 --> 00:52:32,556
Well, he really
seems to love you.
1315
00:52:32,567 --> 00:52:34,266
I know he does.
1316
00:52:34,343 --> 00:52:36,727
When you love
somebody, you gotta
1317
00:52:36,803 --> 00:52:38,154
accept them for who they are.
1318
00:52:45,863 --> 00:52:48,330
[phone ringing]
1319
00:52:49,366 --> 00:52:50,199
I'll get it.
1320
00:52:50,275 --> 00:52:50,916
I'll get it.
1321
00:52:50,993 --> 00:52:52,168
No, I'll get it.
1322
00:52:55,572 --> 00:52:56,496
Hello?
1323
00:52:56,573 --> 00:52:57,831
Hey, are you sitting down?
1324
00:52:57,908 --> 00:52:58,749
No.
1325
00:52:58,825 --> 00:52:59,791
Why?
1326
00:52:59,868 --> 00:53:01,752
The "Holly Davis Show" called.
1327
00:53:01,829 --> 00:53:03,754
They want you on the show
Friday to talk about your book.
1328
00:53:03,830 --> 00:53:04,671
Holly Davis, this Friday?
1329
00:53:04,748 --> 00:53:05,714
MAN: Yes!
1330
00:53:05,791 --> 00:53:07,308
Deepak Chopra canceled.
1331
00:53:07,384 --> 00:53:08,717
He got appendicitis.
1332
00:53:08,794 --> 00:53:09,968
That's fantastic.
1333
00:53:10,045 --> 00:53:11,461
I know.
1334
00:53:11,539 --> 00:53:13,430
Richard, this is the
break of a lifetime.
1335
00:53:13,507 --> 00:53:14,932
One appearance on
that show can really
1336
00:53:15,008 --> 00:53:16,558
put your book over the top.
1337
00:53:16,569 --> 00:53:18,393
I'll call you tomorrow
with the details.
1338
00:53:18,470 --> 00:53:21,021
Perfect, I'll
speak to you then.
1339
00:53:21,032 --> 00:53:22,898
Honey, that's terrific.
1340
00:53:22,975 --> 00:53:24,950
Just wait till
I tell my parents.
1341
00:53:25,027 --> 00:53:26,702
- Don't need, son.
- We heard every word.
1342
00:53:30,482 --> 00:53:32,282
Just last minute
thing fell in my lap,
1343
00:53:32,359 --> 00:53:34,368
and it looks like it
could be a very big break.
1344
00:53:34,444 --> 00:53:35,911
Well, congratulations Richard.
1345
00:53:35,988 --> 00:53:37,821
That sounds very exciting.
1346
00:53:37,898 --> 00:53:39,915
Yeah, I'm sure you'll be
a big hit with dissatisfied,
1347
00:53:39,992 --> 00:53:43,752
overweight housewives
everywhere.
1348
00:53:43,829 --> 00:53:46,630
Seems a bit long in
the sleeves, doesn't it?
1349
00:53:46,707 --> 00:53:48,349
Long, really?
1350
00:53:48,425 --> 00:53:50,509
Richard, your father
and I've been discussing
1351
00:53:50,519 --> 00:53:53,971
this we both feel very strongly
that these Manures have
1352
00:53:54,047 --> 00:53:55,555
got to go.
1353
00:53:55,632 --> 00:53:57,074
If you insist on
continuing your association
1354
00:53:57,150 --> 00:53:59,685
with these horrible
people, your mother and I
1355
00:53:59,695 --> 00:54:01,252
will not be at the wedding.
1356
00:54:01,330 --> 00:54:02,729
ARLEEN CLAYTON: There's
only room enough for one
1357
00:54:02,806 --> 00:54:04,439
set of parents in this family.
1358
00:54:04,516 --> 00:54:06,275
Either us, or them.
1359
00:54:06,351 --> 00:54:08,902
The choice is yours.
1360
00:54:08,979 --> 00:54:12,489
Well, I assure you they'll
be out by the wedding.
1361
00:54:12,566 --> 00:54:13,573
Mother.
1362
00:54:13,650 --> 00:54:14,633
Oh, come on.
1363
00:54:14,709 --> 00:54:16,702
They're fun!
1364
00:54:16,712 --> 00:54:21,006
[country music playing]
1365
00:54:46,099 --> 00:54:47,107
Excuse me, hi.
1366
00:54:47,118 --> 00:54:47,950
Get out of here!
1367
00:54:52,189 --> 00:54:52,913
Ow!
1368
00:55:07,662 --> 00:55:10,797
(SINGING) There's a tree
in a dark place where it's
1369
00:55:10,874 --> 00:55:13,592
hard to make out my
face, and it looks
1370
00:55:13,668 --> 00:55:15,769
to get you up against the bar.
1371
00:55:15,846 --> 00:55:20,607
Although my teeth are missing,
when we started kissing,
1372
00:55:20,684 --> 00:55:25,645
you can't tell the
difference in the dark.
1373
00:55:25,722 --> 00:55:28,065
Oh no you can't
tell the difference,
1374
00:55:28,141 --> 00:55:32,027
can't tell the
difference, you can't just
1375
00:55:32,104 --> 00:55:34,955
tell my difference in the dark.
1376
00:55:37,776 --> 00:55:38,617
Yeah!
1377
00:55:38,693 --> 00:55:39,701
All right.
1378
00:55:39,778 --> 00:55:40,502
Oh.
1379
00:55:42,989 --> 00:55:43,830
Son.
1380
00:55:43,907 --> 00:55:45,215
Whoa, everybody.
1381
00:55:45,292 --> 00:55:48,085
We'd like to introduce
our son, Frank Jr.
1382
00:55:48,161 --> 00:55:49,836
[applause]
1383
00:55:49,913 --> 00:55:51,713
Frank-- I want you.
1384
00:55:51,790 --> 00:55:55,592
These are all my friends
from the Peekaboo Carnival.
1385
00:55:55,669 --> 00:55:57,969
Son, these people just
been passing through,
1386
00:55:58,046 --> 00:56:00,514
how about you sit down
and relax with us.
1387
00:56:00,590 --> 00:56:01,431
No, thanks.
1388
00:56:01,508 --> 00:56:02,849
That's all right.
1389
00:56:02,926 --> 00:56:04,142
I would like to have a word
with my fiance, please.
1390
00:56:04,219 --> 00:56:04,985
In private.
1391
00:56:19,693 --> 00:56:21,701
Hey, I'm 85 years old.
1392
00:56:21,778 --> 00:56:22,619
Congratulations
1393
00:56:22,696 --> 00:56:23,545
Thank you.
1394
00:56:27,993 --> 00:56:29,668
- I want them out now.
- Oh, Richard.
1395
00:56:29,744 --> 00:56:31,086
Let's not go through this again.
1396
00:56:31,163 --> 00:56:32,429
No, no!
1397
00:56:32,506 --> 00:56:33,404
They've overstayed
their welcome,
1398
00:56:33,482 --> 00:56:34,631
and I want them out now.
1399
00:56:34,708 --> 00:56:36,133
And I want all those
people out with him.
1400
00:56:36,210 --> 00:56:37,551
Ellen, you had no
right to let them
1401
00:56:37,627 --> 00:56:39,428
throw a party without at least
consulting with me first?
1402
00:56:39,504 --> 00:56:40,929
Honey, I'm sorry.
1403
00:56:41,006 --> 00:56:42,523
They said they were going to
invite a few friends over.
1404
00:56:42,599 --> 00:56:43,524
I had no idea it was going
to be this elaborate.
1405
00:56:43,600 --> 00:56:44,891
A few?
1406
00:56:44,968 --> 00:56:46,810
That the entire cast of
"Hee-haw" is down there.
1407
00:56:46,821 --> 00:56:48,578
OK, look.
1408
00:56:48,655 --> 00:56:50,247
They haven't seen their
friends in a really long time.
1409
00:56:50,323 --> 00:56:51,532
Can we please just give them
this one little pleasure.
1410
00:56:51,608 --> 00:56:52,899
They said they would
wrap it up by 10.
1411
00:56:52,976 --> 00:56:54,518
10?
1412
00:56:54,520 --> 00:56:56,528
Ellen, I have a live
national television
1413
00:56:56,605 --> 00:56:57,904
appearance tomorrow morning.
1414
00:56:57,981 --> 00:56:59,114
Fine, I'll ask
them to cut it short.
1415
00:56:59,191 --> 00:57:00,599
No!
1416
00:57:00,676 --> 00:57:01,575
I've had it, and I
want them out now.
1417
00:57:01,651 --> 00:57:04,420
These people are a plague.
1418
00:57:04,496 --> 00:57:05,745
Why do you hate them so much?
1419
00:57:05,822 --> 00:57:07,456
Why?
Why?
1420
00:57:07,532 --> 00:57:09,182
I'll tell you why.
1421
00:57:09,259 --> 00:57:10,843
Because they are rude, they're
crude, and they're intrusive.
1422
00:57:10,919 --> 00:57:13,503
They're the most dysfunctional
people that I've ever met.
1423
00:57:13,580 --> 00:57:16,056
They're a biological
and sociological mess.
1424
00:57:16,133 --> 00:57:17,757
It's who they are.
1425
00:57:17,834 --> 00:57:19,509
You just can't stand the
thought you may be the offspring
1426
00:57:19,586 --> 00:57:21,261
of such common people.
- That is not true.
1427
00:57:21,338 --> 00:57:23,221
You know what
you are, Richard?
1428
00:57:23,232 --> 00:57:25,056
You're a snob!
1429
00:57:25,133 --> 00:57:26,859
Are you calling me a snob!
1430
00:57:26,935 --> 00:57:27,734
That's right.
1431
00:57:27,811 --> 00:57:29,144
I'm calling you a snob.
1432
00:57:29,221 --> 00:57:30,812
I am not a snob.
1433
00:57:30,889 --> 00:57:31,771
Yes you are.
1434
00:57:31,848 --> 00:57:33,574
You're a total snob.
1435
00:57:33,650 --> 00:57:35,859
Why don't you just shut up!
1436
00:57:35,936 --> 00:57:36,776
Huh!
1437
00:57:36,853 --> 00:57:38,078
You shut up!
1438
00:57:38,155 --> 00:57:39,779
You shut up.
1439
00:57:39,856 --> 00:57:41,272
Son, son.
1440
00:57:41,350 --> 00:57:44,084
It may not be my place to
say, but you shouldn't be
1441
00:57:44,161 --> 00:57:46,036
talking to your wife like that.
1442
00:57:46,112 --> 00:57:47,954
A man's wife should be
treated with respect.
1443
00:57:48,031 --> 00:57:49,539
That's right.
A man's wife--
1444
00:57:49,616 --> 00:57:50,899
Will you shut up, you cow?
1445
00:57:50,976 --> 00:57:52,042
I'm just trying to
tell him that a man's
1446
00:57:52,118 --> 00:57:53,126
wife is his castle.
1447
00:57:53,203 --> 00:57:54,753
His castle?
1448
00:57:54,829 --> 00:57:55,946
Yes, his castle.
1449
00:57:56,023 --> 00:57:57,047
If your brains
was chocolate, you
1450
00:57:57,123 --> 00:57:58,715
wouldn't have enough
to fill an M&M.
1451
00:57:58,792 --> 00:58:00,509
I'm trying to talk
some sense here,
1452
00:58:00,585 --> 00:58:02,010
and you're going to
mix in your metaphors.
1453
00:58:02,087 --> 00:58:03,253
AGNES MANURE: I'm
just trying to help.
1454
00:58:03,330 --> 00:58:04,971
Well you can help
by shutting up.
1455
00:58:05,048 --> 00:58:06,556
Get out of my house!
1456
00:58:06,633 --> 00:58:08,099
Get out of here!
1457
00:58:08,110 --> 00:58:09,100
Right now!
1458
00:58:09,177 --> 00:58:10,519
All of you!
Party's over!
1459
00:58:10,595 --> 00:58:11,402
That's right.
1460
00:58:11,480 --> 00:58:12,312
Not one more minute.
1461
00:58:12,389 --> 00:58:14,064
Not one more minute.
Out!
1462
00:58:14,140 --> 00:58:14,981
Out!
1463
00:58:15,058 --> 00:58:16,492
Party's over!
1464
00:58:16,568 --> 00:58:17,317
Everyone out.
1465
00:58:17,394 --> 00:58:18,318
Go on.
1466
00:58:18,395 --> 00:58:20,913
What are you, anyway?
1467
00:58:20,989 --> 00:58:22,280
Where do you think you're going?
1468
00:58:22,357 --> 00:58:24,991
I am going to my
mother's, for although she
1469
00:58:25,068 --> 00:58:28,119
may not be perfect, I
accept her for who she is.
1470
00:58:28,130 --> 00:58:28,995
Come back here!
1471
00:58:29,072 --> 00:58:30,130
No.
1472
00:58:30,207 --> 00:58:31,873
Come back here
right this second!
1473
00:58:31,950 --> 00:58:32,758
Not you.
1474
00:58:35,912 --> 00:58:37,796
Ellen!
1475
00:58:37,872 --> 00:58:41,642
[bear grunting]
1476
00:58:48,684 --> 00:58:52,277
[music playing]
1477
00:58:58,018 --> 00:58:59,734
Welcome back.
1478
00:58:59,811 --> 00:59:02,737
If you just joined us, our guest
today is Dr. Richard Clayton,
1479
00:59:02,814 --> 00:59:05,282
the author of a new
self-help book titled "
1480
00:59:05,358 --> 00:59:09,578
Ready, Set, Let Go, A
Guide To Anger Management."
1481
00:59:09,654 --> 00:59:12,664
[applause]
1482
00:59:12,741 --> 00:59:13,906
Ready, set go.
1483
00:59:13,984 --> 00:59:15,926
It seems kind of
simplistic, doesn't it?
1484
00:59:16,003 --> 00:59:18,336
Holly, I can personally
vouch for this program,
1485
00:59:18,413 --> 00:59:20,380
because it certainly
changed my life.
1486
00:59:20,457 --> 00:59:22,591
So tell me, what was
your life like before you
1487
00:59:22,667 --> 00:59:24,050
developed your system?
1488
00:59:24,127 --> 00:59:26,761
Well, I had a very, very,
difficult childhood, which
1489
00:59:26,838 --> 00:59:29,848
led to some quite destructive
tendencies as an adult.
1490
00:59:29,924 --> 00:59:31,942
I was prone to fits of rage.
1491
00:59:32,019 --> 00:59:34,811
Things finally came to a head
when I had a nervous breakdown
1492
00:59:34,822 --> 00:59:36,379
at the age of 29.
1493
00:59:36,456 --> 00:59:39,232
And after being arrested
for disorderly conduct
1494
00:59:39,309 --> 00:59:43,361
after some drunken
binges, I realized
1495
00:59:43,438 --> 00:59:45,196
that it was time for a change.
1496
00:59:45,273 --> 00:59:46,990
I stopped drinking
and eventually
1497
00:59:47,001 --> 00:59:48,408
completed my doctorate.
1498
00:59:48,485 --> 00:59:50,660
That's amazing.
1499
00:59:50,671 --> 00:59:56,082
It is true you haven't lost
your temper in four years?
1500
00:59:56,159 --> 01:00:00,337
Yeah, actually, you could
say that since I developed
1501
01:00:00,413 --> 01:00:03,882
these techniques, I've
definitely managed
1502
01:00:03,958 --> 01:00:05,675
my emotions much better.
1503
01:00:05,752 --> 01:00:08,637
Richard, we have a
little surprise for you.
1504
01:00:08,713 --> 01:00:09,962
A surprise?
1505
01:00:10,040 --> 01:00:12,682
HOLLY DAVIS: We know
you've come a long way.
1506
01:00:12,759 --> 01:00:15,226
Your family must be very proud.
1507
01:00:15,303 --> 01:00:19,272
So we brought your parents here
today to talk about the past
1508
01:00:19,349 --> 01:00:22,692
and how far you've come.
1509
01:00:22,769 --> 01:00:24,535
I beg your pardon.
1510
01:00:24,537 --> 01:00:27,656
In fact, they're here in
the studio audience right now.
1511
01:00:27,732 --> 01:00:29,157
Shall we bring them down?
1512
01:00:29,234 --> 01:00:30,751
Hey, let's bring them down.
1513
01:00:30,827 --> 01:00:32,744
Come on now, folks.
1514
01:00:32,755 --> 01:00:36,998
Please welcome
Richard's parents.
1515
01:00:37,075 --> 01:00:37,957
AGNES MANURE: Hello.
1516
01:00:38,034 --> 01:00:38,900
FRANK MANURE: Hi.
1517
01:00:41,963 --> 01:00:43,096
How the hell are you?
1518
01:00:43,173 --> 01:00:44,264
AGNES MANURE: How
the hell are you?
1519
01:00:44,341 --> 01:00:45,924
Good morning, America!
1520
01:00:46,000 --> 01:00:46,925
Wrong show, ding a ling.
1521
01:00:47,001 --> 01:00:47,875
Shut the hell up.
1522
01:00:51,315 --> 01:00:52,272
Welcome to the show.
1523
01:00:52,349 --> 01:00:54,182
FRANK MANURE: Hi, hi.
1524
01:00:54,259 --> 01:00:55,675
Pleased to know you.
1525
01:00:55,752 --> 01:00:58,061
I'm Frank Manure,
this is my wife Agnes,
1526
01:00:58,072 --> 01:00:59,104
and there's our boy.
1527
01:00:59,114 --> 01:01:04,150
That's him right here, Frank Jr.
1528
01:01:04,227 --> 01:01:05,360
There's been a
terrible mistake.
1529
01:01:05,437 --> 01:01:06,736
These are not my parents.
1530
01:01:06,813 --> 01:01:07,788
These aren't your peers?
1531
01:01:07,864 --> 01:01:08,789
Oh, no.
1532
01:01:08,865 --> 01:01:10,022
Of course we're his parents.
1533
01:01:10,100 --> 01:01:11,616
I mean, I know I
don't look old enough.
1534
01:01:11,693 --> 01:01:13,293
I mean in fact, a friend
of mine recently told me he
1535
01:01:13,370 --> 01:01:15,870
had the skin of a 20-year-old.
1536
01:01:15,881 --> 01:01:18,423
That friend mention anything
about your 50-year-old ass?
1537
01:01:21,845 --> 01:01:23,962
No, your name didn't come up.
1538
01:01:24,038 --> 01:01:26,756
[applause]
1539
01:01:26,833 --> 01:01:28,967
FRANK MANURE: Holly, we
are so proud of our boy.
1540
01:01:29,043 --> 01:01:31,061
He's a chip off the old block.
1541
01:01:31,138 --> 01:01:34,431
As my daddy used to say,
blood is thicker than water.
1542
01:01:34,441 --> 01:01:36,433
Now with all the
alcohol in yours.
1543
01:01:36,509 --> 01:01:39,352
You know he tried a
12 step program once.
1544
01:01:39,429 --> 01:01:41,195
But he got so drunk he
fell down the steps.
1545
01:01:44,901 --> 01:01:46,242
Pardon my wife.
1546
01:01:46,320 --> 01:01:48,328
She's got a mouth
like a damn 7-eleven,
1547
01:01:48,405 --> 01:01:50,330
it's open 24 hours a day.
1548
01:01:50,407 --> 01:01:51,823
I'm sorry.
1549
01:01:51,834 --> 01:01:53,199
I just have to set
something straight here.
1550
01:01:53,276 --> 01:01:56,828
These people--
you're not my parents.
1551
01:01:56,905 --> 01:01:59,122
My parents are Doug
and Arleen Clayton.
1552
01:01:59,133 --> 01:02:01,374
HOLLY DAVIS: I don't understand.
1553
01:02:01,451 --> 01:02:02,876
RICHARD CLAYTON:
These people are bio--
1554
01:02:02,952 --> 01:02:05,044
they contributed biologically.
1555
01:02:05,121 --> 01:02:07,046
So their biological
contributors, yes.
1556
01:02:07,123 --> 01:02:09,883
Technically, they
are parents of mine.
1557
01:02:09,959 --> 01:02:11,409
But they're not my parents.
1558
01:02:11,486 --> 01:02:14,512
My staff was informed
that these are your parents.
1559
01:02:14,589 --> 01:02:15,388
Informed?
1560
01:02:15,465 --> 01:02:17,098
Informed by whom?
1561
01:02:17,175 --> 01:02:18,491
HOLLY DAVIS: Your
brother Mitch, I believe.
1562
01:02:18,568 --> 01:02:20,235
At least I think he
was your brother.
1563
01:02:23,348 --> 01:02:24,364
FRANK MANURE:
Holly, you are going
1564
01:02:24,441 --> 01:02:26,191
to have to excuse our boy.
1565
01:02:26,267 --> 01:02:27,868
He's not himself today.
1566
01:02:27,944 --> 01:02:28,902
AGNES MANURE: That's right,
on account of the trouble
1567
01:02:28,978 --> 01:02:29,911
he's been having.
1568
01:02:29,988 --> 01:02:30,987
HOLLY DAVIS: Trouble?
1569
01:02:31,064 --> 01:02:32,897
FRANK MANURE: It's no big deal.
1570
01:02:32,899 --> 01:02:35,167
He's just been having
trouble with the little lady.
1571
01:02:35,243 --> 01:02:38,119
See, they're fixing
on tying the not.
1572
01:02:38,196 --> 01:02:39,245
Just let it go.
1573
01:02:39,322 --> 01:02:40,313
FRANK MANURE: They
had themselves
1574
01:02:40,390 --> 01:02:41,447
a little misunderstanding.
1575
01:02:41,525 --> 01:02:42,682
You should have
seem him last night.
1576
01:02:42,759 --> 01:02:43,541
He was like a man possessed.
1577
01:02:43,618 --> 01:02:45,117
Let go.
1578
01:02:45,195 --> 01:02:46,836
FRANK MANURE: Yeah, but
they love each other,
1579
01:02:46,913 --> 01:02:50,381
and I'm sure he didn't mean
to scream at her like he did.
1580
01:02:50,392 --> 01:02:51,224
You know--
1581
01:02:51,301 --> 01:02:52,217
He's a good boy.
1582
01:02:52,293 --> 01:02:54,093
We're so proud of him.
1583
01:02:54,170 --> 01:02:56,387
We are so proud of him.
1584
01:02:56,464 --> 01:02:58,264
He's our boy, he's our son.
1585
01:02:58,341 --> 01:02:59,265
AGNES MANURE: He's a good boy.
1586
01:02:59,342 --> 01:03:00,183
We're so--
1587
01:03:00,260 --> 01:03:02,527
[shouting]
1588
01:03:08,560 --> 01:03:09,451
FRANK MANURE:
Don't hurt the boy!
1589
01:03:13,606 --> 01:03:17,116
Leave the boy alone!
1590
01:03:17,193 --> 01:03:18,409
HOLLY DAVIS: We'll
be right back.
1591
01:03:22,115 --> 01:03:25,300
[shouting]
1592
01:03:27,370 --> 01:03:28,253
MITCH CLAYTON: Hey, Jennifer.
1593
01:03:28,329 --> 01:03:29,379
What about tonight?
1594
01:03:29,455 --> 01:03:31,422
What do you mean
you have homework?
1595
01:03:31,433 --> 01:03:33,424
You know, I never did homework.
1596
01:03:33,435 --> 01:03:34,467
Come here, you son of a bitch!
1597
01:03:34,544 --> 01:03:35,385
Ah!
1598
01:03:35,461 --> 01:03:36,886
I'll kill you!
1599
01:03:36,897 --> 01:03:39,055
I'll kill you.
1600
01:03:39,132 --> 01:03:40,223
I'll kill you!
1601
01:03:40,234 --> 01:03:42,183
It was a joke!
1602
01:03:42,260 --> 01:03:44,185
I never meant for
it to go this far!
1603
01:03:44,262 --> 01:03:45,645
RICHARD CLAYTON: I'll kill you!
1604
01:03:45,722 --> 01:03:46,488
Chill!
1605
01:03:49,618 --> 01:03:50,525
Don't!
1606
01:03:50,602 --> 01:03:52,485
It's an Italian sweater!
1607
01:03:52,562 --> 01:03:54,571
Don't pull on it.
1608
01:03:54,647 --> 01:03:55,488
Go ahead.
1609
01:03:55,565 --> 01:03:57,290
Go ahead, hit me.
1610
01:03:57,367 --> 01:03:59,492
The truth is I've always
been jealous of you.
1611
01:03:59,569 --> 01:04:01,661
You've done so much
with your life.
1612
01:04:01,672 --> 01:04:03,371
I've done nothing.
1613
01:04:03,448 --> 01:04:06,007
I guess that's why I've always
been such a prick to you.
1614
01:04:14,459 --> 01:04:16,509
Swish, two points.
1615
01:04:16,586 --> 01:04:17,969
[mitch groaning]
1616
01:04:17,980 --> 01:04:19,604
Wow.
1617
01:04:19,681 --> 01:04:22,181
MAN: There was chaos on the set
of a holiday Davis show as one
1618
01:04:22,258 --> 01:04:24,233
of the guests went berserk.
1619
01:04:24,311 --> 01:04:26,936
Dr. Richard Clayton, author
of a book on anger management,
1620
01:04:27,013 --> 01:04:30,607
blew his top during a taping
of a popular TV talk show,
1621
01:04:30,683 --> 01:04:35,403
attacking his own parents on
camera before a live audience.
1622
01:04:35,480 --> 01:04:41,075
I guess he should have called
his book "Ready, Set, Go Nuts."
1623
01:04:41,152 --> 01:04:43,545
TV: And now, back to
"Mother, Jugs, and Speed."
1624
01:04:47,784 --> 01:04:51,461
Well, there's good news
and there's bad news.
1625
01:04:51,537 --> 01:04:55,223
Bad news is your publisher
called, they want to drop you.
1626
01:04:55,300 --> 01:04:58,051
The book tour has been canceled.
1627
01:04:58,061 --> 01:04:59,978
Kmart has decided to
stop carrying the book.
1628
01:05:02,674 --> 01:05:05,224
The good news?
1629
01:05:05,301 --> 01:05:06,651
You've been invited
to be on Jerry Springer.
1630
01:05:10,139 --> 01:05:12,398
Really at my wit's end, dad.
1631
01:05:12,475 --> 01:05:14,734
Ellen's gone back to
her mother, and I'd
1632
01:05:14,811 --> 01:05:17,946
like to come back to stay for
a couple of days, if I could.
1633
01:05:18,022 --> 01:05:19,739
Just to get my head straight.
1634
01:05:19,816 --> 01:05:22,742
Richard, this is
really not a good time.
1635
01:05:22,819 --> 01:05:25,578
We have guests.
1636
01:05:25,655 --> 01:05:28,081
This is your mess, son.
1637
01:05:28,091 --> 01:05:29,424
You're going to have to
deal with it yourself.
1638
01:05:39,794 --> 01:05:42,679
ANGELA MINNOLA: Oh, Agnes, you
really don't have to do that.
1639
01:05:42,755 --> 01:05:46,182
It's the least we can do, you
letting us stay here and all.
1640
01:05:46,259 --> 01:05:47,475
You mean, it's the
least I could do.
1641
01:05:47,552 --> 01:05:49,194
All you've done is
sit there on your tail
1642
01:05:49,270 --> 01:05:50,353
eating all her damn Mallomars.
1643
01:05:50,430 --> 01:05:51,196
Shut your hole.
1644
01:05:53,850 --> 01:05:56,693
Still no answer.
1645
01:05:56,769 --> 01:05:59,654
We just feel
terrible about this.
1646
01:05:59,731 --> 01:06:02,082
I mean, Mitch told us it was
going to help his career.
1647
01:06:02,158 --> 01:06:04,084
Oh, sugar.
1648
01:06:04,160 --> 01:06:06,086
Is one little
argument worth thrown
1649
01:06:06,162 --> 01:06:07,461
a whole wedding over for?
1650
01:06:10,241 --> 01:06:11,708
I just can't see
myself spending the rest
1651
01:06:11,784 --> 01:06:14,419
of my life with him anymore.
1652
01:06:14,495 --> 01:06:16,587
I feel like he's not the
man I thought he was.
1653
01:06:16,598 --> 01:06:19,757
Maybe you ought to go over
there and see if he's OK.
1654
01:06:19,834 --> 01:06:22,135
Because he won't talk to us.
1655
01:06:22,211 --> 01:06:26,014
[agnes sobbing]
1656
01:06:26,090 --> 01:06:26,731
Aw, honey.
1657
01:06:34,724 --> 01:06:35,490
Richard?
1658
01:06:40,229 --> 01:06:43,039
[crunching glass]
1659
01:07:00,216 --> 01:07:01,132
Richard?
1660
01:07:01,143 --> 01:07:04,019
[dolphin sounds]
1661
01:07:12,178 --> 01:07:14,145
Oh, hi Ellen.
1662
01:07:14,156 --> 01:07:16,064
I didn't-- I didn't
hear you come in.
1663
01:07:16,140 --> 01:07:18,608
Maybe you can give me a hand.
1664
01:07:18,684 --> 01:07:22,195
I'm making a cheese ball.
1665
01:07:22,271 --> 01:07:27,116
Uh, it's a lot
harder than it looks.
1666
01:07:27,127 --> 01:07:30,745
I tried to call you but you--
1667
01:07:30,822 --> 01:07:33,173
Richard, is that meat?
1668
01:07:33,249 --> 01:07:34,165
Mm.
1669
01:07:34,176 --> 01:07:34,974
Barbecue pork.
1670
01:07:35,051 --> 01:07:37,168
It's meat of the month.
1671
01:07:37,245 --> 01:07:41,672
Little read meat is not
so bad, time to time.
1672
01:07:41,749 --> 01:07:46,552
Honey, what are you
doing to yourself?
1673
01:07:46,629 --> 01:07:48,471
I'm accepting my
heritage, Ellen.
1674
01:07:48,548 --> 01:07:52,266
You know, I've had this thing
all wrong from the beginning.
1675
01:07:52,343 --> 01:07:53,284
Why fight it?
1676
01:07:53,286 --> 01:07:54,051
I'm a Manure.
1677
01:07:56,639 --> 01:07:57,897
OK, you know what?
1678
01:07:57,974 --> 01:07:59,107
No.
1679
01:07:59,183 --> 01:08:00,200
What difference does it make?
1680
01:08:00,276 --> 01:08:02,610
I'm ruined anyway.
1681
01:08:02,687 --> 01:08:05,154
This is not the man I know.
1682
01:08:05,231 --> 01:08:06,081
No.
1683
01:08:06,157 --> 01:08:07,782
You knew Richard Clayton.
1684
01:08:07,859 --> 01:08:11,160
I'm Frank Manure, Jr.
How the hell are you?
1685
01:08:11,237 --> 01:08:11,969
Richard.
1686
01:08:12,046 --> 01:08:14,455
This is crazy.
1687
01:08:14,532 --> 01:08:18,334
Well, runs in the family.
1688
01:08:18,411 --> 01:08:19,502
OK, well what about our plans?
1689
01:08:19,513 --> 01:08:20,503
We're supposed to get married?
1690
01:08:20,580 --> 01:08:21,429
We're supposed to--
1691
01:08:21,506 --> 01:08:22,588
And do what?
1692
01:08:22,665 --> 01:08:24,882
Bring more Manures in the world?
1693
01:08:24,959 --> 01:08:26,425
More Kokie Syndrome?
1694
01:08:26,502 --> 01:08:27,635
More Blackfoot?
1695
01:08:27,712 --> 01:08:30,563
[scratching sound]
1696
01:08:31,507 --> 01:08:32,348
No.
1697
01:08:32,425 --> 01:08:33,233
Thank you very much.
1698
01:08:33,309 --> 01:08:34,767
These genes stop here.
1699
01:08:34,844 --> 01:08:37,445
Now if you'll excuse me, I
have a cheese ball to make.
1700
01:08:41,017 --> 01:08:42,316
Well, fine.
1701
01:08:42,393 --> 01:08:45,403
If that's the way
you feel about it.
1702
01:08:45,479 --> 01:08:46,454
Then you should have this back.
1703
01:08:55,698 --> 01:08:56,522
Goodbye.
1704
01:09:00,286 --> 01:09:02,420
That's how I know.
1705
01:09:02,496 --> 01:09:04,672
I'll be fine.
1706
01:09:04,749 --> 01:09:06,474
I'm in complete
control of my emotions.
1707
01:09:11,881 --> 01:09:12,689
Ready, set.
1708
01:09:21,575 --> 01:09:24,784
Mom, he's so far gone
I don't know what to do.
1709
01:09:24,861 --> 01:09:25,776
What happened?
1710
01:09:25,853 --> 01:09:26,661
He's a drunken wreck.
1711
01:09:29,607 --> 01:09:31,365
It's like like he's
totally given up.
1712
01:09:31,442 --> 01:09:34,452
He's even eating meat.
1713
01:09:34,528 --> 01:09:35,411
Richard is eating meat?
1714
01:09:35,488 --> 01:09:36,329
Yes.
1715
01:09:36,405 --> 01:09:37,622
Red meat.
1716
01:09:37,632 --> 01:09:38,789
ANGELA MINNOLA: Well,
he's not himself.
1717
01:09:38,800 --> 01:09:39,957
It's the fear of commitment.
1718
01:09:40,034 --> 01:09:41,375
It's the pressure.
1719
01:09:41,452 --> 01:09:42,668
ELLEN MINNOLA: No,
no, no, no it's not.
1720
01:09:42,745 --> 01:09:44,003
It's the Manures.
1721
01:09:44,014 --> 01:09:48,674
He blames them for everything.
1722
01:09:48,751 --> 01:09:50,968
ANGELA MINNOLA: Aw, baby.
1723
01:09:51,045 --> 01:09:53,846
It's all right.
1724
01:09:53,923 --> 01:09:56,599
It's all right now.
1725
01:09:56,676 --> 01:09:59,560
It's all.
1726
01:09:59,637 --> 01:10:03,448
[doorbell rings]
1727
01:10:13,985 --> 01:10:14,751
Go away!
1728
01:10:17,839 --> 01:10:20,881
[crunching glass]
1729
01:10:24,453 --> 01:10:25,920
Get off my property.
1730
01:10:25,997 --> 01:10:27,880
We just come to
get our things, son.
1731
01:10:27,957 --> 01:10:29,340
We won't be a minute.
1732
01:10:29,351 --> 01:10:30,182
Good news.
1733
01:10:30,184 --> 01:10:31,759
We're leaving.
1734
01:10:31,836 --> 01:10:35,846
The Peekaboo Carnival just
offered us our old jobs back.
1735
01:10:35,923 --> 01:10:36,764
All right.
1736
01:10:36,841 --> 01:10:37,690
Stay there, I'll get it.
1737
01:10:46,642 --> 01:10:47,483
There's your stuff.
1738
01:10:47,560 --> 01:10:49,860
Now Just. go away.
1739
01:10:49,871 --> 01:10:51,654
You didn't happen to
see my silver locket
1740
01:10:51,731 --> 01:10:52,730
laying around, did you?
1741
01:10:52,807 --> 01:10:54,374
It's shaped like a heart.
1742
01:10:54,450 --> 01:10:55,491
No.
1743
01:10:55,568 --> 01:10:56,867
Goodbye.
1744
01:10:56,878 --> 01:10:58,577
Just a second, son.
1745
01:10:58,654 --> 01:11:00,705
RICHARD CLAYTON:
What do you want?
1746
01:11:00,781 --> 01:11:04,384
We would like to speak to
you for a minute, if we could.
1747
01:11:04,460 --> 01:11:06,552
Just one more time, then we'd
be out of your hair for good.
1748
01:11:06,629 --> 01:11:08,379
I promise.
1749
01:11:08,390 --> 01:11:09,681
I think what we have to say,
you'll be very interested in.
1750
01:11:13,169 --> 01:11:14,686
I don't quite know
how to say this.
1751
01:11:18,007 --> 01:11:19,390
Might as well just tell him.
1752
01:11:19,467 --> 01:11:22,601
Would you please
just get to the point?
1753
01:11:22,678 --> 01:11:23,778
We're not really
your parents, son.
1754
01:11:32,063 --> 01:11:33,446
What?
1755
01:11:33,522 --> 01:11:36,407
See, we always wanted
kids, but we never
1756
01:11:36,418 --> 01:11:38,743
could have any of
our own, and then
1757
01:11:38,819 --> 01:11:41,412
we saw that ad in the
paper, and we figured
1758
01:11:41,423 --> 01:11:43,706
well, let's give it a shot.
1759
01:11:43,717 --> 01:11:45,916
No, you can't be serious.
1760
01:11:45,993 --> 01:11:48,836
We had to do some fancy
talking around that detective,
1761
01:11:48,913 --> 01:11:52,965
but we're smarter than we look.
1762
01:11:53,042 --> 01:11:55,435
We never meant no harm.
1763
01:11:55,511 --> 01:12:00,014
So you mean to tell me that
this past week, this entire
1764
01:12:00,091 --> 01:12:02,608
ordeal, was all based on a lie?
1765
01:12:02,685 --> 01:12:07,980
We realize now it was
wrong, and we are very sorry.
1766
01:12:08,057 --> 01:12:09,982
RICHARD CLAYTON: Sorry?
1767
01:12:10,059 --> 01:12:11,817
You're sorry?
1768
01:12:11,894 --> 01:12:14,987
You ruined my life.
1769
01:12:15,064 --> 01:12:16,697
I could have you
arrested for this!
1770
01:12:16,774 --> 01:12:17,656
I told you.
1771
01:12:17,733 --> 01:12:18,908
Well, son.
1772
01:12:18,984 --> 01:12:20,701
That's your choice.
1773
01:12:20,778 --> 01:12:24,964
But then we would have to stick
around for the trial and all.
1774
01:12:25,041 --> 01:12:29,469
Otherwise, we'll just
get out of your hair.
1775
01:12:29,545 --> 01:12:31,462
Perhaps you're
right, Mr. Manure,
1776
01:12:31,473 --> 01:12:33,839
if that is your real name, which
I hope for your sake to God
1777
01:12:33,916 --> 01:12:35,633
that it is not.
1778
01:12:35,709 --> 01:12:40,137
When I think of poor,
sweet, trusting, Ellen,
1779
01:12:40,214 --> 01:12:44,392
defending the two of you, wait
till I tell her about this.
1780
01:12:44,468 --> 01:12:46,977
You are the lowest people
that I have ever met.
1781
01:12:47,054 --> 01:12:50,398
And I see you around here
again, I will call the police.
1782
01:12:50,408 --> 01:12:51,866
Goodbye and good riddance.
1783
01:13:01,777 --> 01:13:02,985
ELLEN MINNOLA: I just
can't believe they
1784
01:13:03,062 --> 01:13:03,994
would do something like that.
1785
01:13:04,071 --> 01:13:05,788
They seemed so genuine.
1786
01:13:05,799 --> 01:13:09,917
I mean, they seemed like
they really cared about you.
1787
01:13:09,994 --> 01:13:11,928
Can we talk in private
just for a second?
1788
01:13:15,708 --> 01:13:17,016
I was headed upstairs.
1789
01:13:17,093 --> 01:13:22,721
Mom, we'll be down in a minute.
1790
01:13:22,798 --> 01:13:25,817
Well, I guess they
fooled both of us, huh?
1791
01:13:25,893 --> 01:13:27,977
But you know, this
doesn't change the way
1792
01:13:28,053 --> 01:13:29,403
that you treated them, Richard.
1793
01:13:29,481 --> 01:13:30,104
You didn't even
know they weren't
1794
01:13:30,181 --> 01:13:31,897
your parents at the time.
1795
01:13:31,974 --> 01:13:37,069
You really-- you really betrayed
the values I thought we shared.
1796
01:13:37,146 --> 01:13:38,538
You're right.
1797
01:13:38,614 --> 01:13:40,397
Ellen, I'm ashamed of
the way that I acted.
1798
01:13:40,474 --> 01:13:43,659
Most of all, I'm ashamed to the
way that I acted towards you.
1799
01:13:43,736 --> 01:13:47,839
I just-- I couldn't accept
the fact that I could--
1800
01:13:47,915 --> 01:13:50,708
that I could have come
from people like that.
1801
01:13:50,784 --> 01:13:53,428
And I've paid a huge price
for it, and not my career.
1802
01:13:53,504 --> 01:13:54,904
I got what I deserved there.
1803
01:13:54,981 --> 01:13:59,675
But Ellen, I don't want
to lose you over this.
1804
01:13:59,752 --> 01:14:01,436
You're the best thing
that's ever happened to me.
1805
01:14:17,144 --> 01:14:20,654
What happened to your watch?
1806
01:14:20,731 --> 01:14:22,781
I stopped wearing it.
1807
01:14:22,858 --> 01:14:23,657
it's too flashy.
1808
01:14:23,734 --> 01:14:24,542
It's really not me.
1809
01:14:27,630 --> 01:14:30,590
Doc.
1810
01:14:30,666 --> 01:14:31,466
Yeah, buddy.
1811
01:15:51,113 --> 01:15:52,871
Well, the
rehearsal went great.
1812
01:15:52,948 --> 01:15:55,708
It's going to be
a lovely wedding.
1813
01:15:55,784 --> 01:15:58,877
Thank heavens those horrible
people are finally gone.
1814
01:15:58,888 --> 01:16:00,629
ARLEEN CLAYTON: We should
be so glad those people
1815
01:16:00,706 --> 01:16:02,347
aren't your real parents.
1816
01:16:02,425 --> 01:16:05,050
I mean, can you imagine being
stuck with people like that
1817
01:16:05,127 --> 01:16:05,893
the rest of your life?
1818
01:16:12,193 --> 01:16:14,694
They're just lucky you
didn't have them arrested.
1819
01:16:14,770 --> 01:16:17,187
To the Manures, who could
not be with us tonight.
1820
01:16:17,264 --> 01:16:21,993
I can only say, thanks .
1821
01:16:22,069 --> 01:16:24,320
ARLEEN CLAYTON: Cheers, cheers.
1822
01:16:24,396 --> 01:16:26,780
I hear this caterer
we're using is wonderful.
1823
01:16:26,857 --> 01:16:27,990
DOUG CLAYTON: The
Coolidges used them
1824
01:16:28,067 --> 01:16:28,874
for their daughters' wedding.
1825
01:16:33,238 --> 01:16:34,504
RICHARD CLAYTON:
Lovely to see you.
1826
01:16:34,582 --> 01:16:35,631
ARLEEN CLAYTON:
Good night, Richard.
1827
01:16:47,461 --> 01:16:48,927
You OK, doc?
1828
01:16:49,004 --> 01:16:50,929
You seem like you have
something on your mind.
1829
01:16:51,006 --> 01:16:52,331
No.
1830
01:16:52,408 --> 01:16:53,140
You're not having
second thoughts, are you?
1831
01:16:53,217 --> 01:16:54,683
No, absolutely not.
1832
01:16:54,760 --> 01:16:57,353
Good.
1833
01:16:57,429 --> 01:16:58,237
I'll see you tomorrow.
1834
01:17:03,819 --> 01:17:04,368
Be safe.
1835
01:17:51,400 --> 01:17:52,950
Ivesdale.
1836
01:17:53,026 --> 01:17:55,836
[music playing]
1837
01:18:29,080 --> 01:18:30,070
AGNES MANURE: Step right up.
1838
01:18:30,081 --> 01:18:31,530
FRANK MANURE: Step right up.
1839
01:18:31,607 --> 01:18:33,866
Step right up, win
yourself a prize.
1840
01:18:33,942 --> 01:18:35,534
Tip them over.
1841
01:18:35,611 --> 01:18:39,037
Knock over the milk cans
and win yourself a big prize.
1842
01:18:39,114 --> 01:18:41,165
You son, you look like
you could throw a ball.
1843
01:18:41,241 --> 01:18:43,333
How about winning a prize
for the pretty young lady.
1844
01:18:43,344 --> 01:18:44,793
Got a lot of nice prizes.
1845
01:18:44,870 --> 01:18:46,846
All right, three balls for $5.
1846
01:18:46,922 --> 01:18:47,921
Thank you.
1847
01:18:47,998 --> 01:18:49,890
There you go, lay into it son.
1848
01:18:52,836 --> 01:18:53,510
Oh.
1849
01:18:53,587 --> 01:18:54,845
Almost.
1850
01:18:54,856 --> 01:18:58,849
Little lower and
to the left there.
1851
01:18:58,860 --> 01:18:59,892
Oh, no.
1852
01:18:59,968 --> 01:19:01,185
Here you go.
1853
01:19:01,261 --> 01:19:02,811
You've got to really
lay your arm in to it.
1854
01:19:02,888 --> 01:19:03,738
You ain't trying hard enough.
1855
01:19:07,893 --> 01:19:09,234
Oh, too bad.
1856
01:19:09,311 --> 01:19:10,235
This is a ripoff.
1857
01:19:10,312 --> 01:19:12,371
Oh, you want to try again?
1858
01:19:12,448 --> 01:19:14,907
I bet I can knock
you over easy enough.
1859
01:19:14,983 --> 01:19:17,326
Well son, since you're
being such a good sport,
1860
01:19:17,402 --> 01:19:20,078
we want to give you
a consolation prize.
1861
01:19:20,155 --> 01:19:21,330
Honey, dear?
1862
01:19:21,406 --> 01:19:24,875
Give him one of the
consolation prizes.
1863
01:19:24,886 --> 01:19:30,005
A real nice doggy for
the young lady in pink.
1864
01:19:30,082 --> 01:19:31,215
Here you go.
1865
01:19:31,291 --> 01:19:33,392
Treat the pink,
your cotton candy.
1866
01:19:33,469 --> 01:19:34,343
Thank you.
1867
01:19:34,419 --> 01:19:35,394
OK, mingle up.
1868
01:19:35,471 --> 01:19:36,303
Thank you very much.
1869
01:19:40,026 --> 01:19:41,667
Real smart, Pop Tart.
1870
01:19:41,744 --> 01:19:44,812
First day back to work, you're
already blowing the profits.
1871
01:19:44,888 --> 01:19:47,189
You know, you can save me
some money on a costume
1872
01:19:47,200 --> 01:19:48,357
by working at the
house of horrors.
1873
01:19:48,433 --> 01:19:49,858
Really?
1874
01:19:49,935 --> 01:19:51,151
You want to see some
horrors, monkey butt,
1875
01:19:51,228 --> 01:19:52,203
I'll show you some horrors.
1876
01:19:52,279 --> 01:19:53,186
FRANK MANURE: Monkey butt?
1877
01:19:53,264 --> 01:19:54,071
AGNES MANURE: Monkey butt.
1878
01:19:54,147 --> 01:19:55,430
FRANK MANURE: Shut up.
1879
01:19:55,508 --> 01:19:56,031
AGNES MANURE: You
better shut up.
1880
01:19:56,108 --> 01:19:56,791
I'd like to play.
1881
01:20:03,574 --> 01:20:08,886
Actually, I just wanted to
give your locket back, mom.
1882
01:20:16,920 --> 01:20:17,478
Why did you lie to me?
1883
01:20:21,508 --> 01:20:24,434
You said that your problems
started when we showed up,
1884
01:20:24,511 --> 01:20:28,055
so we just figured the best
thing to do was to go away.
1885
01:20:31,643 --> 01:20:33,861
So you gave me up
for my own good?
1886
01:20:33,937 --> 01:20:34,495
Again.
1887
01:20:43,447 --> 01:20:46,164
Can you ever forgive me?
1888
01:20:46,241 --> 01:20:47,082
Of course.
1889
01:20:47,159 --> 01:20:48,000
You're our son.
1890
01:20:48,076 --> 01:20:50,335
You're our baby boy.
1891
01:20:50,412 --> 01:20:51,253
Hey.
1892
01:20:51,330 --> 01:20:53,097
Come on, boy.
1893
01:20:58,053 --> 01:21:01,146
Hey, you still want
to come to my wedding?
1894
01:21:01,223 --> 01:21:04,349
Oh, nothing would
give us more pleasure.
1895
01:21:04,426 --> 01:21:07,144
Hey, when is that
wedding, anyway?
1896
01:21:07,220 --> 01:21:09,029
It's about an hour and a half.
1897
01:21:12,359 --> 01:21:13,492
Where is he?
1898
01:21:13,569 --> 01:21:14,535
He should have been
here an hour ago.
1899
01:21:18,023 --> 01:21:18,906
I wouldn't worry about it.
1900
01:21:18,982 --> 01:21:19,540
He'll show up.
1901
01:21:27,374 --> 01:21:28,373
FRANK MANURE: Whoa.
1902
01:21:28,450 --> 01:21:32,669
Here we go That's a good spot.
1903
01:21:32,746 --> 01:21:33,629
Don't be nervous, son.
1904
01:21:33,639 --> 01:21:35,505
Oh, you look so handsome.
1905
01:21:35,516 --> 01:21:38,216
I can't believe I'm
actually doing this.
1906
01:21:38,293 --> 01:21:42,971
All I can say, son, is it if
Ellen makes you half as happy
1907
01:21:43,048 --> 01:21:46,058
as Agnes has made me
throughout the years,
1908
01:21:46,134 --> 01:21:48,936
then you'll only be half
as miserable as I am now.
1909
01:21:49,012 --> 01:21:51,355
Don't make me whip your
butt in front of a church.
1910
01:21:51,431 --> 01:21:53,649
Well, I better get in there.
1911
01:21:53,725 --> 01:21:54,566
Wish me luck.
1912
01:21:54,643 --> 01:21:55,534
Good luck, son.
1913
01:21:55,611 --> 01:21:58,445
Oh, you're going to be fun.
1914
01:21:58,522 --> 01:21:59,914
FRANK MANURE: Don't
forget to say I do.
1915
01:21:59,990 --> 01:22:00,998
All right, I'll
see you in there.
1916
01:22:05,654 --> 01:22:06,703
Kids.
1917
01:22:06,780 --> 01:22:09,581
They grow up so fast.
1918
01:22:09,658 --> 01:22:12,468
[organ music playing]
1919
01:23:03,545 --> 01:23:05,679
Hi, hello everybody.
1920
01:23:05,756 --> 01:23:07,472
Thank you for coming.
1921
01:23:07,549 --> 01:23:09,725
Weddings are a time
when we come together
1922
01:23:09,735 --> 01:23:12,227
to celebrate new family.
1923
01:23:12,304 --> 01:23:15,605
As many of you know, I've
recently had some additions
1924
01:23:15,616 --> 01:23:17,482
to my own family.
1925
01:23:17,559 --> 01:23:21,036
I'm very proud to introduce to
you two special guests of mine,
1926
01:23:21,113 --> 01:23:24,322
who don't appear in your
program, my birth parents,
1927
01:23:24,399 --> 01:23:25,782
Frank and Agnes Manure.
1928
01:23:25,793 --> 01:23:27,117
Please, welcome.
1929
01:23:27,194 --> 01:23:31,005
[applause]
1930
01:23:43,919 --> 01:23:47,354
[organ playing]
1931
01:24:15,375 --> 01:24:17,584
Look so pretty.
1932
01:24:17,661 --> 01:24:18,510
Thank you.
1933
01:24:23,166 --> 01:24:24,391
I'll explain later.
1934
01:24:33,426 --> 01:24:36,186
Dearly beloved,
we are gathered
1935
01:24:36,197 --> 01:24:40,199
together to unite this man and
this woman in holy matrimony.
1936
01:24:58,219 --> 01:24:59,209
FRANK MANURE: Is it--
1937
01:24:59,220 --> 01:25:00,527
Is it on?
1938
01:25:00,529 --> 01:25:01,628
AGNES MANURE: Well,
the red light's on,
1939
01:25:01,705 --> 01:25:02,629
means the camera's running.
1940
01:25:02,706 --> 01:25:04,881
Wait a minute, what's this?
1941
01:25:04,892 --> 01:25:06,850
Oh.
1942
01:25:06,927 --> 01:25:09,553
FRANK MANURE: Here we are
at the maternity ward,
1943
01:25:09,563 --> 01:25:11,680
waiting to find--
1944
01:25:11,756 --> 01:25:13,107
Oh my god.
1945
01:25:13,183 --> 01:25:13,890
Please.
1946
01:25:13,967 --> 01:25:15,517
What are you going?
1947
01:25:15,528 --> 01:25:17,602
Oh, no no.
1948
01:25:17,679 --> 01:25:20,272
FRANK MANURE: What do
you got hanging there?
1949
01:25:20,348 --> 01:25:21,198
Oh, stop that.
1950
01:25:24,895 --> 01:25:26,745
Oh, here we go.
1951
01:25:26,822 --> 01:25:28,163
I love you.
1952
01:25:28,240 --> 01:25:32,251
I'm just so happy,
and so excited
1953
01:25:32,327 --> 01:25:33,869
about Richard and my daughter.
1954
01:25:33,945 --> 01:25:35,579
Watch it, Spielberg.
1955
01:25:35,655 --> 01:25:38,748
And now for the horror
portion of our program.
1956
01:25:38,759 --> 01:25:40,759
You better watch what you
you're doing with that camera,
1957
01:25:40,836 --> 01:25:42,627
or else you're going to
find some extra footage
1958
01:25:42,704 --> 01:25:44,462
where the sun don't shine.
1959
01:25:44,473 --> 01:25:46,590
So, anybody want to
come in and say hello?
1960
01:25:46,666 --> 01:25:49,309
[cheering]
1961
01:25:53,849 --> 01:25:56,808
Oh my.
1962
01:25:56,885 --> 01:26:00,478
I'd like you to meet
little Rufus Clayton.
1963
01:26:00,555 --> 01:26:01,730
RICHARD CLAYTON: Let
me take the camera.
1964
01:26:01,806 --> 01:26:02,573
Here.
1965
01:26:06,394 --> 01:26:09,246
Angela how do you feel
about being a grandmother?
1966
01:26:16,780 --> 01:26:18,246
He looks like a Harvard man.
1967
01:26:18,323 --> 01:26:20,582
Oh no, Yale.
1968
01:26:20,593 --> 01:26:21,791
FRANK MANURE: Papa
Clayton passing by,
1969
01:26:21,868 --> 01:26:23,335
for crying out loud.
1970
01:26:23,411 --> 01:26:25,795
All right, I know.
1971
01:26:25,806 --> 01:26:27,306
Oh my god.
1972
01:26:27,382 --> 01:26:29,216
AGNES MANURE: He
looks just like you.
1973
01:26:29,292 --> 01:26:30,634
Don't he look like me?
1974
01:26:30,710 --> 01:26:33,762
All wrinkled and short
with his mouth wide open.
1975
01:26:33,838 --> 01:26:36,231
Don't mind her, she's
the first one in her family
1976
01:26:36,308 --> 01:26:39,559
born in captivity.
1977
01:26:39,636 --> 01:26:40,852
There you go.
1978
01:26:40,929 --> 01:26:41,695
Oh!
1979
01:26:47,277 --> 01:26:48,652
FRANK MANURE:
There you go, papa.
1980
01:26:48,728 --> 01:26:49,536
All right, papa.
1981
01:27:01,324 --> 01:27:03,541
Oh yeah, he's a
manure all right.
1982
01:27:03,618 --> 01:27:06,386
[music playing]
1983
01:27:25,098 --> 01:27:29,067
(SINGING) Now I've never
been mistookin for someone
1984
01:27:29,144 --> 01:27:31,870
who's good lookin,
but I'd like to take
1985
01:27:31,947 --> 01:27:34,414
you walking through the park.
1986
01:27:34,491 --> 01:27:40,036
Although I know I ain't
pretty, don't go from the city,
1987
01:27:40,047 --> 01:27:44,541
you can't tell the
difference in the dark.
1988
01:27:44,617 --> 01:27:46,584
Oh no you can't
tell the difference,
1989
01:27:46,661 --> 01:27:49,546
can't tell the difference.
1990
01:27:49,622 --> 01:27:54,050
You can't tell the
difference in that dark.
1991
01:27:54,127 --> 01:27:57,387
Although you're above
me, still you're
1992
01:27:57,464 --> 01:27:59,931
going to love me cause
you just can't tell
1993
01:28:00,008 --> 01:28:01,775
the difference and the dark.
1994
01:28:26,918 --> 01:28:29,553
There's a tree out in
a dark place, where it's
1995
01:28:29,629 --> 01:28:32,464
hard to make out my
face, and I'd love
1996
01:28:32,540 --> 01:28:35,884
to get you up against the bark.
1997
01:28:35,960 --> 01:28:38,970
Although my teeth
might be missing,
1998
01:28:38,981 --> 01:28:42,599
when we started
kissing, you can't tell
1999
01:28:42,609 --> 01:28:45,393
the difference in the dark.
2000
01:28:45,404 --> 01:28:47,946
Oh no you can't
tell the difference,
2001
01:28:48,023 --> 01:28:51,908
can't tell the
difference, you can't tell
2002
01:28:51,985 --> 01:28:55,987
the difference in the dark.
2003
01:28:56,064 --> 01:28:58,990
Although I ain't
dreamy, you ain't
2004
01:28:59,067 --> 01:29:01,126
going to see me, because
you just can't tell
2005
01:29:01,203 --> 01:29:04,496
the difference in the dark.
2006
01:29:04,506 --> 01:29:08,550
No you just can't tell the
difference in the dark.
2007
01:29:08,627 --> 01:29:12,012
[music playing]
129073
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