Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:14,181 --> 00:00:16,181
♪ theme song playing ♪
2
00:00:16,183 --> 00:00:19,313
♪ It's time for Animaniacs! ♪
3
00:00:19,770 --> 00:00:21,980
♪ And we're zany to the max ♪
4
00:00:22,689 --> 00:00:24,399
♪ So just sit back and relax ♪
5
00:00:24,399 --> 00:00:25,979
♪ You'll laugh till you collapse ♪
6
00:00:25,984 --> 00:00:27,994
♪ We're Animaniacs! ♪
7
00:00:28,529 --> 00:00:31,699
♪ Come join the Warner Brothers ♪
♪ And the Warner Sister Dot ♪
8
00:00:31,698 --> 00:00:34,698
♪ Just for fun, we run around
the Warner movie lot ♪
9
00:00:34,701 --> 00:00:37,331
♪ They lock us in the tower
whenever we get caught ♪
10
00:00:37,329 --> 00:00:40,329
♪ But we break loose and then vamoose
and now you know the plot ♪
11
00:00:40,332 --> 00:00:42,332
♪ We're Animaniacs ♪
12
00:00:42,876 --> 00:00:45,746
♪ Dot has wit and Yakko yaks ♪
13
00:00:45,754 --> 00:00:47,304
♪ Wakko packs away the snacks ♪
14
00:00:47,297 --> 00:00:49,007
♪ Our careers have made comebacks ♪
15
00:00:49,007 --> 00:00:50,877
♪ We're Animaniacs! ♪
16
00:00:51,635 --> 00:00:54,635
♪ Meet Pinky and the Brain
who want to rule the universe ♪
17
00:00:54,638 --> 00:00:57,388
♪ A brand new cast who tested well
in focus group research ♪
18
00:00:57,391 --> 00:00:59,141
♪ Gender balanced, pronoun neutral ♪
19
00:00:59,142 --> 00:01:00,602
♪ And ethnically diverse ♪
20
00:01:00,602 --> 00:01:03,402
♪ The trolls will say we're so passé,
but we did meta first ♪
21
00:01:03,397 --> 00:01:05,897
♪ We're Animaniacs ♪
22
00:01:05,899 --> 00:01:08,989
♪ You should see our new contracts ♪
23
00:01:08,986 --> 00:01:11,986
♪ We're zany to the max,
there's baloney in our slacks ♪
24
00:01:11,989 --> 00:01:14,949
♪ We're animaney, totally insaney ♪
25
00:01:14,950 --> 00:01:16,540
♪ Inertial reference framey ♪
26
00:01:16,535 --> 00:01:20,075
♪ Animaniacs! Those are the facts ♪
27
00:01:25,169 --> 00:01:28,169
♪
28
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♪
29
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As the CEO of Warner Brothers,
30
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I've been told by my executive coach
31
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that I need to listen more,
32
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even though listening is very boring
33
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and my least favorite of all the senses.
34
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So, let me know how I can improve
35
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life on the lot.
36
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[sarcastically]:
I'd love to hear from all of you.
37
00:01:54,114 --> 00:01:56,164
DIRECTOR [whispering]:
Okay, that was great, but could we just...
38
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Well then, how was
I supposed to say that line!?
39
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[angry growl]
[fighting]
40
00:01:59,912 --> 00:02:02,082
DIRECTOR: Nora, no! Oh!
YAKKO: What are you two doing?
41
00:02:02,080 --> 00:02:05,460
The CEO created
an online suggestion box!
42
00:02:05,459 --> 00:02:08,299
Okay. I want beef chili
in the water fountains,
43
00:02:08,295 --> 00:02:11,585
a "Young Wakko" spinoff
starring me as my own dad,
44
00:02:11,590 --> 00:02:14,550
and every other Friday,
we shouldn't have to wear pants.
45
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You already don't wear pants.
46
00:02:17,137 --> 00:02:18,467
Oh...
47
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Fine then! I want some pants
to take off every other Friday!
48
00:02:22,643 --> 00:02:23,853
[click, beep]
49
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[beep]
50
00:02:25,646 --> 00:02:27,266
Ugh. That's annoying.
51
00:02:27,272 --> 00:02:30,532
What's the point of doing anything on
the internet if you can't be anonymous?
52
00:02:30,526 --> 00:02:34,026
Yeah! I'm not gonna put in my email.
Then don't.
53
00:02:36,573 --> 00:02:37,283
[beep]
54
00:02:37,282 --> 00:02:40,242
Hey! Make like a cobbler and shoo!
55
00:02:43,247 --> 00:02:45,617
[growling]
Eh, forget it, Dot.
56
00:02:45,624 --> 00:02:47,634
We should probably get off
the computer anyway.
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00:02:47,626 --> 00:02:49,586
♪
58
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What the HEpair of chopsticks!?
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00:02:54,550 --> 00:02:57,220
FEMALE POPUP VOICE:
Hello. Please sign up.
60
00:02:58,053 --> 00:02:59,683
Never! [grunts]
61
00:03:02,432 --> 00:03:03,932
POPUP:
Hello. Please sign up.
62
00:03:03,934 --> 00:03:05,444
[screaming]
63
00:03:09,064 --> 00:03:11,694
Signing up is fun and free.
64
00:03:11,692 --> 00:03:13,362
[Warners screaming]
65
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[panting]
66
00:03:16,488 --> 00:03:17,908
Okay. I think the coast is
67
00:03:17,906 --> 00:03:19,866
POPUP: Please sign up.
68
00:03:21,618 --> 00:03:22,998
[motorized shredding]
69
00:03:22,995 --> 00:03:24,075
ALL:
Phew!
70
00:03:26,915 --> 00:03:27,955
[beeping]
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00:03:27,958 --> 00:03:29,038
Sign up to make
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00:03:29,042 --> 00:03:30,712
the world a better place.
[screaming]
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♪
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00:03:38,760 --> 00:03:40,050
♪ dramatic sting ♪
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[rumbling]
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00:03:41,972 --> 00:03:42,932
[gulps]
77
00:03:43,765 --> 00:03:44,765
[screaming]
78
00:03:45,434 --> 00:03:46,274
[sighing]
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[smash]
[all gasp]
80
00:03:49,354 --> 00:03:50,564
[beep]
Hello.
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00:03:50,564 --> 00:03:51,984
[screaming]
82
00:03:51,982 --> 00:03:53,482
Let's get started.
[thud]
83
00:03:53,483 --> 00:03:56,573
It will only take a few seconds.
[smashing]
84
00:03:56,570 --> 00:03:58,030
We said...
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not... now!
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00:04:03,410 --> 00:04:04,040
[grunts]
87
00:04:06,413 --> 00:04:07,503
[beep]
88
00:04:09,249 --> 00:04:10,249
[engine revving]
89
00:04:11,251 --> 00:04:12,591
[tires screeching]
90
00:04:14,922 --> 00:04:16,342
Please... sign up.
91
00:04:16,340 --> 00:04:17,930
Please sign up...
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00:04:17,925 --> 00:04:19,465
[beeping]
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00:04:21,303 --> 00:04:22,723
♪
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00:04:26,475 --> 00:04:29,135
[shoveling]
95
00:04:29,144 --> 00:04:31,614
DOT/WAKKO: Phew!
Okay, uh,
96
00:04:31,605 --> 00:04:33,515
does anybody wanna say a few words?
97
00:04:33,524 --> 00:04:35,864
Sure. Ahem.
98
00:04:35,859 --> 00:04:37,819
Mustard. Umbrella.
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00:04:37,819 --> 00:04:39,449
Borborygmus.
100
00:04:39,446 --> 00:04:41,066
[stomach growl]
101
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That was beautiful, Wakko.
102
00:04:42,991 --> 00:04:44,121
Well, what should we do
103
00:04:44,117 --> 00:04:44,787
Ah!
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POPUP: Sign up to continue.
[thunder crashes]
105
00:04:47,496 --> 00:04:49,616
No! [sobs]
106
00:04:49,623 --> 00:04:51,883
I think we should just submit!
107
00:04:51,875 --> 00:04:53,625
[sighs] Maybe you're right.
108
00:04:53,627 --> 00:04:55,297
♪
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00:04:55,295 --> 00:04:56,545
[beep]
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[typing]
111
00:04:59,466 --> 00:05:01,586
Why'd you pick YakkoWarner2?
112
00:05:01,593 --> 00:05:03,013
YakkoWarner was taken.
113
00:05:03,011 --> 00:05:05,221
By me!
[Yakko growls]
114
00:05:05,222 --> 00:05:06,012
[beep]
115
00:05:06,014 --> 00:05:07,934
POPUP:
Thank you. Please note. By submitting...
116
00:05:07,933 --> 00:05:09,643
[faster]:
you, the undersigned, forfeit all rights,
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00:05:09,643 --> 00:05:11,853
privileges, and licenses
herein and herein contained,
118
00:05:11,854 --> 00:05:14,864
et cetera, et cetera,
sanctus sanctus dominus, e pluribus unum,
119
00:05:14,857 --> 00:05:17,107
ipso facto, veni vidi vici, et tu brute.
120
00:05:17,109 --> 00:05:18,149
[zap]
121
00:05:19,486 --> 00:05:21,526
♪
122
00:05:22,614 --> 00:05:25,624
Finally! Peace at last!
123
00:05:26,159 --> 00:05:28,159
[laughter]
124
00:05:28,161 --> 00:05:30,251
[thunder, wind blowing]
125
00:05:32,291 --> 00:05:34,291
♪
126
00:05:34,293 --> 00:05:36,753
Oh no! We're getting spammed!
127
00:05:38,797 --> 00:05:39,837
DOT/WAKKO:
Ah!
128
00:05:39,840 --> 00:05:42,720
MALE POPUP VOICE: We've made
some changes to our privacy policy
129
00:05:42,718 --> 00:05:45,468
by eliminating the privacy
part of the policy.
130
00:05:46,889 --> 00:05:48,389
[Warners screaming]
131
00:05:49,141 --> 00:05:52,521
FEMALE POPUP VOICE:
Get 80% off our least desirable items.
132
00:05:52,519 --> 00:05:55,269
Ooh! I can't say no to 80% off.
133
00:05:55,272 --> 00:05:57,612
What if they have
hot looks at cool prices?
134
00:05:57,608 --> 00:05:59,568
BOTH:
No! Don't open it!
135
00:05:59,568 --> 00:06:00,818
[chimes]
136
00:06:00,819 --> 00:06:02,319
[gasp, groaning]
137
00:06:02,321 --> 00:06:04,071
They got Wakko!
[beeping]
138
00:06:04,072 --> 00:06:05,322
♪
139
00:06:05,324 --> 00:06:06,834
[crackling]
140
00:06:06,825 --> 00:06:08,405
[robotic]: Greetings, Dot Warner.
141
00:06:08,410 --> 00:06:11,870
I can't believe the deal I got
on these name brand sunglasses.
142
00:06:11,872 --> 00:06:13,622
Clicclick here.
143
00:06:13,624 --> 00:06:14,754
He's been hacked!
144
00:06:14,750 --> 00:06:15,630
♪
145
00:06:17,044 --> 00:06:17,964
♪
146
00:06:19,004 --> 00:06:19,674
♪
147
00:06:20,797 --> 00:06:22,467
[robotic]: Greetings, Yakko Warner.
148
00:06:22,466 --> 00:06:24,466
III can't believe the deal I got
149
00:06:24,468 --> 00:06:26,758
on these naname brand sunglasses.
150
00:06:26,762 --> 00:06:27,762
Click here.
151
00:06:27,763 --> 00:06:29,063
[screaming]
152
00:06:30,974 --> 00:06:32,774
Get thee behind me, scammers!
153
00:06:32,768 --> 00:06:35,768
The power of twofactor
authentication compels you!
154
00:06:35,771 --> 00:06:37,021
[grunting]
155
00:06:37,689 --> 00:06:39,439
[robotic]:
Greetings, Dot Warner.
156
00:06:39,441 --> 00:06:40,441
[beeping]
157
00:06:40,442 --> 00:06:41,992
♪
158
00:06:41,985 --> 00:06:43,195
[thunder crashes]
159
00:06:44,488 --> 00:06:46,448
It's... not... working!
160
00:06:46,448 --> 00:06:48,528
We've gotta reformat him!
161
00:06:48,534 --> 00:06:49,034
[grunts]
162
00:06:50,118 --> 00:06:50,908
♪
163
00:06:54,998 --> 00:06:55,958
[straining]
164
00:06:57,042 --> 00:06:58,672
[beeping]
165
00:06:58,669 --> 00:07:00,459
Log out of all active sessions!
166
00:07:01,964 --> 00:07:03,724
BOTH:
Reset password with at least
167
00:07:03,715 --> 00:07:06,835
one number, capital letter,
and special character!
168
00:07:08,554 --> 00:07:10,014
[robotic]: I have successfully...
169
00:07:10,013 --> 00:07:12,023
[normal]:
changed all my passwords.
170
00:07:17,271 --> 00:07:19,021
[sighs] What happened?
171
00:07:19,022 --> 00:07:21,442
Did I get the cool looks at hot prices?
172
00:07:21,441 --> 00:07:23,691
POPUP:
We are so sad to see you go.
173
00:07:24,945 --> 00:07:27,355
What if we only get in touch, like,
174
00:07:27,364 --> 00:07:29,534
three times a day? Is that okay?
175
00:07:29,533 --> 00:07:31,083
♪
176
00:07:31,660 --> 00:07:32,870
[Dot and Yakko screaming]
177
00:07:32,870 --> 00:07:34,870
[all screaming]
178
00:07:34,872 --> 00:07:36,962
[buzzing]
179
00:07:36,957 --> 00:07:39,287
ALL:
Unsubscribe! Unsubscribe!
180
00:07:41,461 --> 00:07:42,961
♪
181
00:07:42,963 --> 00:07:45,053
[buzzing]
182
00:07:45,674 --> 00:07:46,934
[screaming]
183
00:07:47,551 --> 00:07:48,891
[screaming]
184
00:07:50,637 --> 00:07:53,217
[all screaming]
185
00:07:54,558 --> 00:07:56,558
[all panting]
186
00:07:59,605 --> 00:08:01,435
DOT/YAKKO: Phew.
[Wakko grunts]
187
00:08:02,399 --> 00:08:04,149
[screaming]
188
00:08:04,151 --> 00:08:05,741
[straining]
189
00:08:05,736 --> 00:08:07,776
Wa
[shredding]
190
00:08:07,779 --> 00:08:09,869
♪
191
00:08:09,865 --> 00:08:11,365
[screaming, yelling]
192
00:08:13,535 --> 00:08:14,575
♪ dramatic sting ♪
193
00:08:14,828 --> 00:08:16,908
[grunts]
[engine revving]
194
00:08:21,627 --> 00:08:23,247
[screaming]
195
00:08:23,253 --> 00:08:25,463
[crash, explosion]
196
00:08:25,464 --> 00:08:28,264
[gasping]
[wind blowing]
197
00:08:28,258 --> 00:08:30,048
[yell, grunting]
198
00:08:30,052 --> 00:08:31,602
♪ dramatic sting ♪
199
00:08:31,595 --> 00:08:33,175
[thunder crashes]
200
00:08:33,180 --> 00:08:35,060
No!
201
00:08:35,641 --> 00:08:36,601
[screams]
202
00:08:39,311 --> 00:08:42,231
♪
203
00:08:42,231 --> 00:08:44,021
In all seriousness, folks,
204
00:08:44,024 --> 00:08:46,494
the internet can be a treacherous place.
205
00:08:46,485 --> 00:08:49,105
Be careful not to submit
your personal information
206
00:08:49,112 --> 00:08:50,822
to third parties.
207
00:08:51,365 --> 00:08:53,075
Thank you, Wakko. In fact,
208
00:08:53,075 --> 00:08:55,535
there is only one website you can trust.
209
00:08:55,536 --> 00:09:01,416
www.dotwarnermalwarevirusspreader
indentitythefttrojanhorsebotcom.edy
210
00:09:01,792 --> 00:09:05,302
Order now, and use
the promo code "suckers"
211
00:09:05,295 --> 00:09:07,915
to add 50% onto your purchase!
212
00:09:11,593 --> 00:09:13,013
[thunder]
213
00:09:13,011 --> 00:09:15,761
♪ Pinky & the Brain theme playing ♪
214
00:09:16,849 --> 00:09:18,519
Gee, Brain,
what do you wanna do tonight?
215
00:09:19,476 --> 00:09:22,146
The same thing we do every night, Pinky.
216
00:09:22,145 --> 00:09:25,605
Try to take over the world!
[thunder crashes]
217
00:09:25,607 --> 00:09:27,727
♪
218
00:09:27,734 --> 00:09:29,704
♪ They're Pinky and the Brain ♪
219
00:09:29,695 --> 00:09:31,905
♪ Yes, Pinky and the Brain ♪
220
00:09:31,905 --> 00:09:33,775
♪ One is a genius ♪
221
00:09:33,782 --> 00:09:35,702
♪ The other's insane ♪
222
00:09:35,701 --> 00:09:37,741
♪ They're laboratory mice ♪
223
00:09:37,744 --> 00:09:39,714
♪ Their genes have been spliced ♪
224
00:09:39,705 --> 00:09:42,415
♪ They're dinky,
they're Pinky and the Brain ♪
225
00:09:42,416 --> 00:09:44,416
♪ Brain, Brain, Brain, Brain ♪
226
00:09:50,465 --> 00:09:53,465
♪
227
00:09:55,679 --> 00:09:57,969
Expecting to see your two favorite mice
228
00:09:57,973 --> 00:10:01,523
being dumb and smart
or whatever it is that they do?
229
00:10:01,518 --> 00:10:05,058
Unfortunately,
nobody's seen them in months.
230
00:10:05,063 --> 00:10:08,863
So, to fill the slot,
I turned otherwise useless footage
231
00:10:08,859 --> 00:10:12,199
into a nostalgic streaming experience!
232
00:10:12,196 --> 00:10:14,776
You see, Pinky and the Brain wasn't always
233
00:10:14,781 --> 00:10:16,781
the show we know and love today.
234
00:10:16,783 --> 00:10:19,663
In fact, the studio
struggled to find a vehicle
235
00:10:19,661 --> 00:10:22,331
for the dynamic duo for a long,
236
00:10:22,331 --> 00:10:24,251
long time.
237
00:10:24,249 --> 00:10:26,039
What you're about to see
238
00:10:26,043 --> 00:10:29,303
are the original pilots
for Pinky and the Brain.
239
00:10:29,296 --> 00:10:31,966
They've never been seen by anyone before.
240
00:10:31,965 --> 00:10:33,965
Except the archival editor
241
00:10:33,967 --> 00:10:36,467
who shaves his face
over the water fountain.
242
00:10:37,262 --> 00:10:40,472
So, open wide, baby birdies.
243
00:10:40,474 --> 00:10:43,484
Mommy's about to regurgitate some slop
244
00:10:43,477 --> 00:10:46,607
into your contenthungry mouths.
245
00:10:46,605 --> 00:10:47,855
[retching]
246
00:10:47,856 --> 00:10:49,146
[bars and tone]
247
00:10:49,149 --> 00:10:51,939
♪ '50sstyle music ♪
248
00:10:51,944 --> 00:10:54,704
ANNOUNCER:
The Pink and The Brain Show!
249
00:10:54,696 --> 00:10:56,776
Starring Pinky!
250
00:10:58,158 --> 00:11:00,328
And The Brain!
251
00:11:00,327 --> 00:11:02,287
[canned laughter]
252
00:11:03,080 --> 00:11:04,620
[grumble]
[slam]
253
00:11:04,623 --> 00:11:06,923
[sighs] Pinky! I'm home!
254
00:11:06,917 --> 00:11:09,587
I snuck out of work early
because Old Man Jenkins
255
00:11:09,586 --> 00:11:12,876
is taking the senior partners
out for a celebratory dinner.
256
00:11:12,881 --> 00:11:15,261
But of course, I didn't get the invite.
257
00:11:16,385 --> 00:11:17,635
[sniffing]
258
00:11:18,303 --> 00:11:21,103
Pinky, what is that putrid smell!?
259
00:11:21,098 --> 00:11:22,888
[splatter]
That's din
260
00:11:22,891 --> 00:11:25,641
[applause]
261
00:11:25,644 --> 00:11:27,154
That's dinner, Brain.
262
00:11:27,145 --> 00:11:29,815
I made potatoes all rotten!
263
00:11:29,815 --> 00:11:31,145
[canned laughter]
[groans]
264
00:11:31,149 --> 00:11:32,859
It's potatoes au gratin,
265
00:11:32,860 --> 00:11:35,150
you domestic doddypoll.
266
00:11:35,153 --> 00:11:37,283
One of these days, I'm gonna
267
00:11:37,281 --> 00:11:40,031
transfer the kinetic energy of my fist
268
00:11:40,033 --> 00:11:43,163
into a force vector applied
directly to your oral aperture!
269
00:11:43,161 --> 00:11:46,751
Ooh! I've never been to Connecticut.
Sounds cozy.
270
00:11:46,748 --> 00:11:49,958
[screaming studio laughter]
271
00:11:49,960 --> 00:11:51,550
[laughter quiets down]
272
00:11:51,545 --> 00:11:53,295
Hey, Brain!
273
00:11:53,297 --> 00:11:55,717
Why don't we go celebrate
me ruining dinner
274
00:11:55,716 --> 00:11:58,796
by going to eat dinner at
a fancy dinner restaurant?
275
00:11:58,802 --> 00:12:00,722
Ah, yes.
276
00:12:00,721 --> 00:12:02,561
And let me guess.
277
00:12:02,556 --> 00:12:04,216
Whatever restaurant we choose
278
00:12:04,224 --> 00:12:06,854
will be the exact establishment my boss
279
00:12:06,852 --> 00:12:08,692
[Director screams]
and the senior partners are dining at
280
00:12:08,687 --> 00:12:09,977
this evening, correct?
281
00:12:09,980 --> 00:12:11,690
This, despite the fact that we live in
282
00:12:11,690 --> 00:12:14,320
a sprawling metropolis,
where the possibility
283
00:12:14,318 --> 00:12:17,568
of picking the same
restaurant is almost nil.
284
00:12:18,572 --> 00:12:20,872
Ahem. Spoiler alert.
285
00:12:20,866 --> 00:12:22,826
[studio laughter]
286
00:12:22,826 --> 00:12:24,326
Warner Brothers...
287
00:12:26,496 --> 00:12:28,326
[laughter continues]
288
00:12:28,332 --> 00:12:30,462
[fire alarm ringing]
289
00:12:30,459 --> 00:12:34,089
Well, that's the last time
I make those potatoes!
290
00:12:34,087 --> 00:12:36,337
♪
291
00:12:37,841 --> 00:12:40,181
Test audiences found Brain's character
292
00:12:40,177 --> 00:12:43,177
patriarchal, cruel, and sadistic.
293
00:12:43,180 --> 00:12:44,470
Yah!
[glass shatters]
294
00:12:44,765 --> 00:12:47,345
Despite having everything a 1950s audience
295
00:12:47,351 --> 00:12:49,481
was looking for in a TV husband,
296
00:12:49,478 --> 00:12:52,018
the show failed due
to creative differences.
297
00:12:52,022 --> 00:12:55,282
But they gave him
another shot a few years later.
298
00:12:55,275 --> 00:12:56,355
[bars and tone]
299
00:12:56,360 --> 00:12:57,740
♪ Brady Bunchstyle music ♪
300
00:12:57,736 --> 00:13:01,156
♪ Here's a ditty 'bout
a mouse named Pinky ♪
301
00:13:02,366 --> 00:13:05,906
♪ Who had three little
Pinkies of her own ♪ [laughing]
302
00:13:05,911 --> 00:13:09,161
♪ They all had fur that's
white like their mama ♪
303
00:13:09,164 --> 00:13:11,964
♪ The baby wore a cone ♪
304
00:13:12,668 --> 00:13:15,958
♪ Here's a refrain 'bout
a mouse named Brain ♪ [Brain yelps]
305
00:13:17,339 --> 00:13:20,259
♪ He had three little
Brain boys by his side... ♪
306
00:13:20,259 --> 00:13:21,469
No!
307
00:13:21,468 --> 00:13:23,548
This is a flawed premise.
308
00:13:23,554 --> 00:13:26,604
Nobody with three children
would willingly sign up
309
00:13:26,598 --> 00:13:28,388
for three more.
310
00:13:28,392 --> 00:13:30,352
Who wrote this improbable drivel?
311
00:13:31,478 --> 00:13:34,108
Um, it was based on my life.
312
00:13:35,023 --> 00:13:38,403
Well, I suggest you
write yourself a new one.
313
00:13:39,570 --> 00:13:42,950
That's what I think of you,
Warner Brothers!
314
00:13:43,615 --> 00:13:45,825
[laughter]
[crash]
315
00:13:45,826 --> 00:13:47,486
♪
316
00:13:47,494 --> 00:13:50,294
Now, who's going to
teach me how to drive?
317
00:13:50,289 --> 00:13:52,419
It's always about you!
318
00:13:52,416 --> 00:13:54,326
Pinky, Pinky, Pinky!
319
00:13:54,334 --> 00:13:57,714
Eh, I can't say this
one was all on Brain.
320
00:13:57,713 --> 00:13:59,553
It was 1969.
321
00:13:59,548 --> 00:14:02,088
Everyone was making bad decisions.
322
00:14:02,092 --> 00:14:04,682
For instance, my sister Theodora
323
00:14:04,678 --> 00:14:07,508
was born that year. [growls]
324
00:14:07,514 --> 00:14:11,274
This next pilot took all the attention
away from Mommy and Daddy
325
00:14:11,268 --> 00:14:14,438
and lasted as long
as Theodora's first marriage.
326
00:14:14,438 --> 00:14:15,518
Enjoy.
327
00:14:15,522 --> 00:14:16,522
[bars and tone]
328
00:14:16,523 --> 00:14:18,943
[Warners laughing]
329
00:14:18,942 --> 00:14:20,192
[panting]
330
00:14:20,194 --> 00:14:23,244
♪ Cheersstyle music ♪
331
00:14:23,238 --> 00:14:26,068
♪ Getting through
to the end of the day ♪
332
00:14:26,074 --> 00:14:28,874
♪ Sure is pretty hard ♪
333
00:14:28,869 --> 00:14:31,209
♪ Stepping back would surely shed ♪
334
00:14:31,205 --> 00:14:34,035
♪ Some light on where you are ♪
335
00:14:34,958 --> 00:14:38,338
♪ How would you like to take a break? ♪
336
00:14:41,715 --> 00:14:43,965
♪ Don't you wanna be ♪
337
00:14:43,967 --> 00:14:46,927
♪ Where the coffee's always hot? ♪
338
00:14:49,223 --> 00:14:52,603
♪ And you know they'll brew another pot ♪
339
00:14:54,520 --> 00:14:57,270
♪ Life is tough, and you are sad ♪
340
00:14:57,272 --> 00:15:00,232
♪ So go and drink until you're glad ♪
341
00:15:00,234 --> 00:15:03,034
♪ The coffee's black, and it is hot ♪
342
00:15:03,028 --> 00:15:05,858
♪ Forget about everything you're not ♪
343
00:15:05,864 --> 00:15:08,454
♪ Just go somewhere
and avoid your problems ♪
344
00:15:08,450 --> 00:15:11,040
♪ Instead of facing them ♪
345
00:15:11,036 --> 00:15:13,906
♪ Yeah, coffee ♪
346
00:15:13,914 --> 00:15:16,924
♪
347
00:15:19,753 --> 00:15:21,263
♪ theme ends ♪
348
00:15:21,255 --> 00:15:25,045
PINKY: Narfs is filmed in front of
a live studio audience. Narfs!
349
00:15:25,050 --> 00:15:27,220
[audience applause, cheering]
350
00:15:27,219 --> 00:15:29,599
[grunts]
[thunder crashes]
351
00:15:29,596 --> 00:15:32,426
Afternoon, Pinky.
ALL: Brain!
352
00:15:32,891 --> 00:15:35,141
How does everyone in here know my name?
353
00:15:35,143 --> 00:15:37,773
This is a place where
everybody knows your name.
354
00:15:37,771 --> 00:15:39,401
Didn't you listen to the theme song?
355
00:15:39,398 --> 00:15:42,318
It didn't mention that
in the theme song.
356
00:15:42,317 --> 00:15:44,987
[coffee maker whistling]
Oh. Maybe that's that other song
357
00:15:44,987 --> 00:15:47,487
that's almost the same, but way better.
358
00:15:47,489 --> 00:15:51,409
Regardless, it's quite a depressing
ditty for a comedy show, don't you think?
359
00:15:51,410 --> 00:15:54,120
Don't any of you have hopes or dreams?
[coffee maker whistling, rattling]
360
00:15:55,122 --> 00:15:57,882
I hope I can get another coffee!
361
00:15:57,875 --> 00:16:00,835
[audience laughter]
362
00:16:00,836 --> 00:16:04,126
[laughing]
[sighs] Forget it.
363
00:16:04,131 --> 00:16:05,801
[grunts]
[laughter continues]
364
00:16:05,799 --> 00:16:07,629
[whistling, rattling]
[laughing] Ooh?
365
00:16:08,594 --> 00:16:10,604
BRAIN:
Warner Brothers!
366
00:16:10,596 --> 00:16:12,806
It took Warner Brothers eight years
367
00:16:12,806 --> 00:16:15,306
to calm Brain down. [grunts]
368
00:16:16,101 --> 00:16:18,981
And when that didn't work,
they threatened to make him
369
00:16:18,979 --> 00:16:21,439
the "next Urkel."
370
00:16:21,440 --> 00:16:23,780
And with that, he was back the same day
371
00:16:23,775 --> 00:16:26,025
to shoot this next pilot.
372
00:16:26,028 --> 00:16:27,028
[bars and tone]
373
00:16:27,029 --> 00:16:29,989
♪ Fresh Prince of Bel Airstyle music ♪
374
00:16:35,245 --> 00:16:38,745
♪ So, this is a tale,
I'm telling you how ♪
375
00:16:38,749 --> 00:16:40,829
♪ A mouse's life got all messed around ♪
376
00:16:40,834 --> 00:16:43,254
♪ And I'd rather take no time
and tell you point blank ♪
377
00:16:43,253 --> 00:16:46,053
♪ About how I became
the Fresh Pinky of Burbank ♪
378
00:16:47,716 --> 00:16:50,796
♪ Narf! Narf Narf! Narf! Poit! ♪
379
00:16:50,802 --> 00:16:53,892
♪
380
00:16:53,889 --> 00:16:55,269
[grunts]
381
00:16:56,016 --> 00:16:57,516
[audience cheering]
382
00:16:58,060 --> 00:17:01,560
Pinky! You were supposed
to be back over an hour ago!
383
00:17:01,563 --> 00:17:04,403
My bad, Brain.
I guess I'm not used to the rules
384
00:17:04,399 --> 00:17:06,899
because I'm from
the wrong side of the tracks.
385
00:17:07,903 --> 00:17:11,823
Well, be that as it may,
you're going to have a lot
386
00:17:11,823 --> 00:17:14,793
of explaining to do
when Mom and Dad get home.
387
00:17:14,785 --> 00:17:17,495
Why would I have to explain
that I was late? [grunts]
388
00:17:17,496 --> 00:17:19,996
They'll never know, unless you tell 'em.
389
00:17:19,998 --> 00:17:21,998
AUDIENCE:
Ooh...
390
00:17:22,000 --> 00:17:24,960
Are you suggesting that I lie
391
00:17:24,962 --> 00:17:26,802
to my mother and father?
392
00:17:27,256 --> 00:17:30,676
All I'm saying is what they
don't know can't hurt them.
393
00:17:30,676 --> 00:17:32,586
[audience cheering]
394
00:17:32,594 --> 00:17:36,474
Wow, Pinky.
I suppose despite my academic prowess,
395
00:17:36,473 --> 00:17:39,023
I still can learn quite a bit from you.
396
00:17:39,017 --> 00:17:41,597
You're darn right, Brain.
You've got the book smarts,
397
00:17:41,603 --> 00:17:43,863
but I've got the street smarts.
398
00:17:43,856 --> 00:17:46,776
I've got street smarts, too! Heck,
399
00:17:46,775 --> 00:17:50,105
I've even got street moves! Check it out!
400
00:17:50,112 --> 00:17:53,622
[audience cheering]
♪ hip hop music playing ♪
401
00:17:53,615 --> 00:17:56,155
[cheering continues]
402
00:17:56,159 --> 00:17:59,749
They love me. They really, really love me!
403
00:18:00,205 --> 00:18:02,615
♪
404
00:18:02,624 --> 00:18:06,344
Huzzah! What is the word, my good man?
405
00:18:06,336 --> 00:18:09,456
[laughs]
[crowd cheering]
406
00:18:09,464 --> 00:18:10,804
[laughing]
407
00:18:10,799 --> 00:18:12,129
[Egwind grunts]
408
00:18:12,759 --> 00:18:15,219
[crickets chirping]
409
00:18:15,220 --> 00:18:17,680
[crowd cheering]
[grunts]
410
00:18:17,681 --> 00:18:20,481
[audience gasps]
You philistines.
411
00:18:20,475 --> 00:18:22,595
I've debased myself in front of you
412
00:18:22,603 --> 00:18:24,523
with my circus chicanery,
413
00:18:24,521 --> 00:18:29,481
and yet, you worship at the feet of
this sunglassed buffoon!
414
00:18:29,484 --> 00:18:33,034
AUDIENCE MEMBER: Woo!
Well, I will be your Pagliacci no more!
415
00:18:33,030 --> 00:18:34,070
[Egwind gasps]
416
00:18:34,072 --> 00:18:36,202
Fare thee well!
417
00:18:36,200 --> 00:18:37,330
[crash]
418
00:18:37,326 --> 00:18:39,696
Good riddance, you third rate,
419
00:18:39,703 --> 00:18:41,963
third wheel ham actor!
420
00:18:41,955 --> 00:18:43,615
[eagle screeches]
[Egwind screams]
421
00:18:43,624 --> 00:18:45,334
♪
422
00:18:46,668 --> 00:18:50,418
I am finished doing
terrible sitcom pilots!
423
00:18:50,422 --> 00:18:52,262
There's more to life than being told
424
00:18:52,257 --> 00:18:54,587
what to say and do all the time, Pinky!
425
00:18:54,593 --> 00:18:57,183
Now, come with me!
Righto!
426
00:18:57,179 --> 00:18:59,469
We must prepare for tomorrow night.
427
00:18:59,473 --> 00:19:01,683
Why, Brain? What are
we gonna do tomorrow night?
428
00:19:01,683 --> 00:19:04,813
Try to take over the world!
429
00:19:04,811 --> 00:19:07,611
And with that iconic proclamation,
430
00:19:07,606 --> 00:19:12,316
the highly successful
Pinky and the Brain franchise was born.
431
00:19:12,319 --> 00:19:14,699
And now, it's dead
432
00:19:14,696 --> 00:19:16,526
because they're missing.
433
00:19:16,532 --> 00:19:18,202
[phone rings]
434
00:19:18,200 --> 00:19:19,830
What is it!?
435
00:19:19,826 --> 00:19:22,286
Oh! You found them!
436
00:19:22,287 --> 00:19:25,707
Wonderful. Get them back on set!
437
00:19:25,707 --> 00:19:28,127
[grunts]
How adorable.
438
00:19:28,126 --> 00:19:31,706
She thinks she's punishing us,
when she's actually punishing
439
00:19:31,713 --> 00:19:34,053
our clones.
Clones?
440
00:19:34,049 --> 00:19:35,219
That's right.
441
00:19:36,176 --> 00:19:39,176
♪
442
00:19:39,429 --> 00:19:40,719
[alarm blares]
443
00:19:44,768 --> 00:19:48,688
After receiving the latest script
of our "adventures,"
444
00:19:48,689 --> 00:19:50,609
I reached my breaking point.
445
00:19:50,607 --> 00:19:53,777
I will no longer do the bidding
of my television overlords.
446
00:19:54,695 --> 00:19:55,645
Instead,
447
00:19:55,654 --> 00:19:58,534
I have created clones
who will do my bidding,
448
00:19:58,532 --> 00:20:01,792
leaving us free to truly
pursue world domination.
449
00:20:02,744 --> 00:20:06,544
So, you mean to tell me
the Pinky and the Brain show
450
00:20:06,540 --> 00:20:08,130
isn't going to be us anymore?
451
00:20:08,125 --> 00:20:11,125
Precisely. No one will be the wiser
452
00:20:11,128 --> 00:20:13,668
as these clones are indistinguishable
453
00:20:13,672 --> 00:20:15,472
from us in every facet!
454
00:20:15,465 --> 00:20:18,465
[Brain's voice]: Gee, Brain.
What do you wanna do tonight?
455
00:20:18,468 --> 00:20:19,968
[Pinky's voice]: Pancakes!
456
00:20:19,970 --> 00:20:22,890
Narf... [inhales deeply]
457
00:20:22,890 --> 00:20:25,640
Egad! It's like looking in the mirror!
458
00:20:25,642 --> 00:20:26,942
[sighs]
459
00:20:26,935 --> 00:20:29,555
Cloning is an art, not a science.
460
00:20:29,563 --> 00:20:33,193
And alas, I am merely
the world's foremost scientific mind.
461
00:20:34,151 --> 00:20:37,321
Come, Pinky.
We must prepare for tomorrow night.
462
00:20:37,321 --> 00:20:39,741
Why, Brain?
What are we gonna do tomorrow night?
463
00:20:39,740 --> 00:20:42,490
[gasps] Ooh, please let it be pancakes!
464
00:20:42,492 --> 00:20:43,742
[machine hissing]
465
00:20:43,744 --> 00:20:46,464
The same thing we do every night, Pinky.
466
00:20:46,455 --> 00:20:48,415
Try to take over the world!
467
00:20:48,415 --> 00:20:50,415
[hissing, rattling]
468
00:20:51,502 --> 00:20:53,632
♪
469
00:20:57,382 --> 00:20:59,012
[VCR clicking, whirring]
470
00:20:59,009 --> 00:21:01,889
♪ distorted music ♪
471
00:21:01,887 --> 00:21:04,887
♪ retro upbeat music ♪
472
00:21:07,351 --> 00:21:10,401
Hey, gang!
It's time for Everyday Safety!
473
00:21:10,395 --> 00:21:12,105
That's right! We're here to give you
474
00:21:12,105 --> 00:21:15,185
everyday safety tips for
the most common emergencies.
475
00:21:15,192 --> 00:21:16,822
Tonight, what to do in the event of
476
00:21:16,818 --> 00:21:20,238
a giant, exploding syrup factory
at the top of a very tall hill
477
00:21:20,239 --> 00:21:21,529
overlooking your city.
478
00:21:21,532 --> 00:21:23,532
♪
479
00:21:25,786 --> 00:21:27,536
Think fast! Don't panic!
480
00:21:27,538 --> 00:21:30,498
A million gallons of piping hot syrup
are racing toward you!
481
00:21:30,499 --> 00:21:32,579
First,
grab your emergency supplies.
482
00:21:32,584 --> 00:21:35,554
They should be in your
Exploding Syrup Factory Emergency Bag.
483
00:21:35,546 --> 00:21:38,046
It should contain an inflatable raft,
484
00:21:38,048 --> 00:21:39,928
a metric ton of ice,
485
00:21:39,925 --> 00:21:41,675
an ant farm with three active queens,
486
00:21:41,677 --> 00:21:43,637
some pancake mix, a bat,
487
00:21:43,637 --> 00:21:45,097
and a radio.
488
00:21:49,434 --> 00:21:51,854
Inflate the raft and throw it
at the syrup wave
489
00:21:51,854 --> 00:21:53,944
to buy yourself some time.
[grunts]
490
00:21:57,442 --> 00:21:59,492
YAKKO:
Now, carve the metric ton of ice
491
00:21:59,486 --> 00:22:02,236
into an authentic igloo
and take shelter inside.
492
00:22:02,239 --> 00:22:05,119
Better get carving!
That syrup's coming in hot!
493
00:22:05,117 --> 00:22:06,577
♪
494
00:22:06,577 --> 00:22:08,577
[grinding]
It's finished!
495
00:22:09,538 --> 00:22:10,538
[door slams]
496
00:22:14,543 --> 00:22:16,043
♪ relaxed music ♪
497
00:22:17,129 --> 00:22:18,549
[rattling]
498
00:22:20,007 --> 00:22:23,507
Oh no! My hands are sticky,
and I don't have a napkin
499
00:22:23,510 --> 00:22:25,600
because it's an emergency.
500
00:22:25,596 --> 00:22:27,886
Don't worry.
That's what the ants are for.
501
00:22:27,890 --> 00:22:28,970
♪
502
00:22:30,601 --> 00:22:32,351
[ants chirping]
503
00:22:32,352 --> 00:22:33,352
[gasps]
504
00:22:33,353 --> 00:22:34,483
What's the radio for?
505
00:22:34,479 --> 00:22:36,769
Once the syrup cools,
we'll be trapped in here
506
00:22:36,773 --> 00:22:39,443
for millions of years
like mosquitoes in amber,
507
00:22:39,443 --> 00:22:41,243
so we'll need some entertainment.
508
00:22:42,446 --> 00:22:45,946
NPR DJ:
You're listening to hour 97
509
00:22:45,949 --> 00:22:48,949
of "The Art and Craft of Storytelling,"
510
00:22:48,952 --> 00:22:50,502
with Irv Gold.
511
00:22:50,495 --> 00:22:52,995
IRV GOLD:
I often ask myself, what is storytell
512
00:22:52,998 --> 00:22:54,168
[Dot grunts]
[fizzling]
513
00:22:54,166 --> 00:22:56,496
And that is what the bat's for.
514
00:22:56,502 --> 00:22:58,252
This has been Everyday Safety.
515
00:22:58,253 --> 00:23:00,263
Tune in next time
when we share tips
516
00:23:00,255 --> 00:23:02,465
for when you're with your grandmother
visiting a home
517
00:23:02,466 --> 00:23:05,296
for rehabilitated rattlesnakes,
and there's a power failure
518
00:23:05,302 --> 00:23:07,682
that opens the doors to
the rattlesnake enclosure,
519
00:23:07,679 --> 00:23:09,769
but also your pockets
are filled with maracas,
520
00:23:09,765 --> 00:23:11,885
so you can't tell where
the sounds are coming from.
521
00:23:11,892 --> 00:23:13,352
[hissing, rattling]
522
00:23:13,352 --> 00:23:15,352
Who wants the first Flatty Patty?
523
00:23:15,354 --> 00:23:18,194
Mm! Oh no! We forgot the butter!
524
00:23:18,190 --> 00:23:19,730
Don't worry, I'll go get some.
525
00:23:19,733 --> 00:23:20,783
DOT/YAKKO:
No!
526
00:23:20,776 --> 00:23:22,276
[splattering]
[gasps]
527
00:23:22,277 --> 00:23:23,607
♪
528
00:23:23,612 --> 00:23:25,912
WAKKO [distorted]:
Oh, the viscosity!
529
00:23:26,573 --> 00:23:28,783
♪ retro upbeat music ♪
530
00:23:30,786 --> 00:23:33,786
♪
531
00:23:33,836 --> 00:23:38,386
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