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1
00:00:10,270 --> 00:00:11,890
Annie, sweetie,
2
00:00:11,899 --> 00:00:14,319
are you sure you're not
gonna join us at the pool?
3
00:00:14,320 --> 00:00:16,400
I don't feel like swimming.
4
00:00:16,407 --> 00:00:18,620
I'd like you to make the
most of this vacation.
5
00:00:18,621 --> 00:00:20,160
You know, your dad's already down there
6
00:00:20,165 --> 00:00:22,355
and he said he'd go diving
for pennies with you!
7
00:00:22,356 --> 00:00:25,049
Can't I just read?
8
00:00:25,050 --> 00:00:28,180
OK, but if you change
your mind, come on down.
9
00:00:28,181 --> 00:00:29,349
OK.
10
00:00:29,350 --> 00:00:30,519
- Come on!
- Hurry up!
11
00:00:36,150 --> 00:00:39,860
- Synced & corrected by MementMori -
12
00:01:11,142 --> 00:01:13,919
Aw, look at you.
13
00:01:13,920 --> 00:01:16,150
I guess Lamar inspired you to cook?
14
00:01:16,152 --> 00:01:17,730
Yeah, I guess he did.
15
00:01:17,739 --> 00:01:20,205
Does that mean you're
gonna fuck me as well?
16
00:01:21,120 --> 00:01:23,370
Oh, God.
17
00:01:23,375 --> 00:01:27,545
Fran. I'm... I'm sorry.
18
00:01:27,546 --> 00:01:29,590
- Are you mad?
- Why would I be mad?
19
00:01:29,596 --> 00:01:32,008
We're one step closer to being sisters.
20
00:01:32,009 --> 00:01:35,850
Ohh. Oh, God!
21
00:01:35,858 --> 00:01:38,070
OK. I...
22
00:01:38,071 --> 00:01:40,569
I hope you know that,
like, Lamar and I talked,
23
00:01:40,570 --> 00:01:42,160
and I was gonna tell you.
24
00:01:42,170 --> 00:01:45,209
Well, he already told me.
He has a very big mouth.
25
00:01:45,210 --> 00:01:47,380
I mean, you knew that
already, because...
26
00:01:47,381 --> 00:01:49,651
- you just took his virginity.
- Fran.
27
00:01:49,652 --> 00:01:52,320
- No.
- Ohh!
28
00:01:52,321 --> 00:01:55,770
I forgot that you believed
in Santa until you were 16.
29
00:01:55,773 --> 00:01:59,150
- My God! Ugh, what?
- Gullible baby possum.
30
00:01:59,155 --> 00:02:03,830
- So how'd you feel about last night?
- I mean...
31
00:02:03,831 --> 00:02:05,249
pretty fuckin' good.
32
00:02:05,250 --> 00:02:06,669
Whoa!
33
00:02:06,670 --> 00:02:09,754
No. What are you doing?
That's my brother.
34
00:02:09,755 --> 00:02:11,923
- Oh. I know.
- That's inappropriate.
35
00:02:11,924 --> 00:02:13,508
OK, wow, no.
36
00:02:13,509 --> 00:02:16,310
Tell me how you feel in terms of
your emotions, and nothing more.
37
00:02:16,314 --> 00:02:19,319
Well, if I'm being totally honest,
38
00:02:19,320 --> 00:02:21,650
I mean, I don't know,
39
00:02:21,658 --> 00:02:23,851
Ryan was just with someone else,
40
00:02:23,852 --> 00:02:27,669
but I just told him how
fucked up that was,
41
00:02:27,670 --> 00:02:29,710
and then I went and did
the exact same thing.
42
00:02:29,716 --> 00:02:32,652
Like, I just, I don't
know, I feel kind of...
43
00:02:32,653 --> 00:02:34,300
Please don't say guilty.
44
00:02:34,308 --> 00:02:36,470
- I do. I feel guilty.
- Great.
45
00:02:36,479 --> 00:02:38,270
OK, nope. Nope.
46
00:02:38,274 --> 00:02:41,029
I would like to propose and instill
47
00:02:41,030 --> 00:02:44,160
a strict "No Ryan" rule
in this house, thank you.
48
00:02:44,161 --> 00:02:47,660
- Wha... what's that?
- It means never say his name,
49
00:02:47,669 --> 00:02:49,669
never bring him into our home.
50
00:02:49,670 --> 00:02:52,970
He is an ignorant bag of expired meat,
51
00:02:52,971 --> 00:02:55,349
and I've told you and told
you, and you're not listening,
52
00:02:55,350 --> 00:02:57,885
and I'm getting tired of it, so
I have to be strict with you.
53
00:02:57,886 --> 00:03:01,650
OK, but I've been wanting to be
Mrs. Expired Meat for a while.
54
00:03:01,655 --> 00:03:04,080
- Oh, my God, can I have that?
- No.
55
00:03:06,790 --> 00:03:08,105
No.
56
00:03:09,169 --> 00:03:10,773
All right, it's official,
57
00:03:10,774 --> 00:03:13,970
we're doing the "Thousand and One
Summer Stories" issue again,
58
00:03:13,971 --> 00:03:17,280
so please, let's be
diligent about the overlap?
59
00:03:17,281 --> 00:03:19,390
We don't need three stories
about vaginal waxing.
60
00:03:19,398 --> 00:03:22,069
- Plus, bush is back.
- I agree.
61
00:03:22,070 --> 00:03:25,320
Also, HR has a new insurance policy,
62
00:03:25,327 --> 00:03:28,370
which means we have a preventative
health discount program,
63
00:03:28,374 --> 00:03:31,539
which means I save a buttload
of money if you can manage
64
00:03:31,540 --> 00:03:35,540
to pry your cheese-thighs off the
couch more than once a week.
65
00:03:35,550 --> 00:03:36,800
Okay, didn't you write about this
66
00:03:36,808 --> 00:03:39,060
- for your obesity epidemic article?
- I did write about that.
67
00:03:39,063 --> 00:03:40,887
- Thank you for giving a fuck.
- I loved that story, Gabe,
68
00:03:40,888 --> 00:03:43,020
- it changed me.
- Andy, fuck off.
69
00:03:43,029 --> 00:03:46,142
OK, look, we're gonna be getting
rid of the vending machines...
70
00:03:46,143 --> 00:03:47,780
- What?
- ... and we're gonna do
71
00:03:47,789 --> 00:03:51,250
one heart-healthy
"grouptivity" once a month,
72
00:03:51,253 --> 00:03:54,300
- starting this week.
- Oh, cool. Forced fun.
73
00:03:54,301 --> 00:03:56,589
That's right, forced fun.
I like that. Forced fun.
74
00:03:56,590 --> 00:03:57,739
We're gonna call it Forced Fun,
75
00:03:57,740 --> 00:04:00,980
and our first Forced Fun
activity is this Saturday.
76
00:04:00,981 --> 00:04:04,320
It's gonna be a ten-mile bike ride
around Sauvie Island. How's that?
77
00:04:04,321 --> 00:04:06,659
Actually, I just got my youngest
a bike, so that'll be fun.
78
00:04:06,660 --> 00:04:09,410
Oh, no, no youngest, no kids.
Kids are the opposite of fun.
79
00:04:09,415 --> 00:04:12,080
Kids are like mice on a glue trap,
80
00:04:12,087 --> 00:04:14,921
squealing and shitting
until you drown them.
81
00:04:14,922 --> 00:04:16,479
All right, I've got a call in five.
82
00:04:16,480 --> 00:04:18,659
That means you're gonna
email me your pitches.
83
00:04:18,660 --> 00:04:20,850
- That'll be all.
- Oh, actually, Gabe,
84
00:04:20,855 --> 00:04:22,350
if I could just give
you a quick pitch...
85
00:04:22,357 --> 00:04:24,690
Didn't I literally just
say email the pitches?
86
00:04:24,696 --> 00:04:26,610
- Yes. Yes.
- But you're gonna give me a pitch.
87
00:04:26,616 --> 00:04:28,086
Well, I heard about this pool party,
88
00:04:28,087 --> 00:04:29,370
and it's all about inclusivity...
89
00:04:29,371 --> 00:04:31,869
- I hate that word.
- ... and celebrating larger bodies,
90
00:04:31,870 --> 00:04:33,239
and they sent it to the calendar,
91
00:04:33,240 --> 00:04:35,330
but I think it could be a cool story.
92
00:04:35,340 --> 00:04:37,679
Bodies in a pool. That's
not a story, Annie.
93
00:04:37,680 --> 00:04:40,600
OK, but it actually is about
a lot more than that.
94
00:04:40,603 --> 00:04:42,889
It's about people feeling
comfortable in their own skin.
95
00:04:42,890 --> 00:04:44,399
The last thing we need
is everybody feeling
96
00:04:44,400 --> 00:04:45,570
comfortable in their own skin.
97
00:04:45,571 --> 00:04:46,661
That would be the '70s.
98
00:04:46,662 --> 00:04:49,490
My gut instinct is that
it's not a good fit.
99
00:04:49,495 --> 00:04:52,370
Great fit for the calendar.
Go crazy with that.
100
00:04:52,375 --> 00:04:55,210
OK, and you should
definitely trust your gut,
101
00:04:55,215 --> 00:04:57,880
but I also think that my
last article is proof...
102
00:04:57,881 --> 00:05:00,299
... that my instincts
might be good, too.
103
00:05:00,300 --> 00:05:02,729
- Right?
- Annie, we gotta pace ourselves.
104
00:05:02,730 --> 00:05:05,440
Remember Gutenberg's second
idea after the printing press?
105
00:05:05,443 --> 00:05:07,279
- No.
- Exactly.
106
00:05:07,280 --> 00:05:09,110
The answer is no. Thank you so much.
107
00:05:09,118 --> 00:05:11,710
- Are we good? Great.
- Y-Yeah.
108
00:05:21,685 --> 00:05:24,940
God! He was just so
dismissive about my article.
109
00:05:24,941 --> 00:05:28,480
Yeah. He just compared my human
children to rodents, so...
110
00:05:28,489 --> 00:05:31,450
I know. But, like, am I
just back to square one?
111
00:05:31,453 --> 00:05:33,579
I'm just the calendar girl now?
112
00:05:33,580 --> 00:05:34,779
You've got a log-in and a password.
113
00:05:34,780 --> 00:05:37,380
Just go online and upload somethin'.
114
00:05:37,382 --> 00:05:40,179
Yeah, but wouldn't
that make Gabe so mad?
115
00:05:40,180 --> 00:05:42,010
No. Not if it's good.
116
00:05:42,017 --> 00:05:44,890
Remember what happened
with your last article.
117
00:05:44,898 --> 00:05:47,319
I mean, that's true. That's true.
118
00:05:47,320 --> 00:05:49,390
And I'm going to the party anyway.
119
00:05:49,400 --> 00:05:52,910
I might as well at least see
if there's an angle, right?
120
00:05:52,914 --> 00:05:56,230
- Why not?
- Annie Easton investigates.
121
00:05:57,506 --> 00:05:59,350
Oh! Shit.
122
00:06:02,140 --> 00:06:05,490
We raided the vending
machine... Oh, fuck! Shit!
123
00:06:06,900 --> 00:06:10,120
Fuck shit! Fuckin' shit!
124
00:06:11,116 --> 00:06:13,080
I'm gonna get some candy.
125
00:06:16,168 --> 00:06:19,330
Did you know that fruit was
actually the original inspiration
126
00:06:19,340 --> 00:06:21,170
- for candy?
- No.
127
00:06:21,173 --> 00:06:22,600
Annie!
128
00:06:23,099 --> 00:06:25,060
Oh, my God. Who is that?
129
00:06:25,061 --> 00:06:27,649
Looks like Chewbacca
after an acid attack.
130
00:06:27,650 --> 00:06:30,097
Um, yeah, I... I actually...
131
00:06:30,098 --> 00:06:32,740
- I know him.
- Ew.
132
00:06:32,743 --> 00:06:36,249
Yeah. Um, I'll... I'll
talk to you tomorrow.
133
00:06:36,250 --> 00:06:37,670
Bye.
134
00:06:42,012 --> 00:06:44,640
- Hey.
- What are you doing here?
135
00:06:44,642 --> 00:06:47,100
- You didn't answer my text.
- Yeah.
136
00:06:47,105 --> 00:06:48,940
Well...
137
00:06:48,942 --> 00:06:50,570
are you still mad at me?
138
00:06:50,571 --> 00:06:52,200
I don't know.
139
00:06:55,748 --> 00:06:57,790
Annie. Hey, maybe we can...
140
00:06:57,793 --> 00:07:01,299
OK, OK. I should just
tell you something, OK?
141
00:07:01,300 --> 00:07:03,882
Um, I was with someone else.
142
00:07:06,477 --> 00:07:08,770
And I don't want to hide it from you,
143
00:07:08,774 --> 00:07:12,516
and so now you know
that... I fucked someone.
144
00:07:13,617 --> 00:07:15,370
Oh, shit.
145
00:07:17,062 --> 00:07:19,750
I don't know why you
even care, honestly,
146
00:07:19,754 --> 00:07:22,090
but that's what I was doing
when I wasn't with you.
147
00:07:22,092 --> 00:07:23,560
Wait, wait, wait, wait.
148
00:07:24,889 --> 00:07:26,890
- Who was it?
- Someone I know.
149
00:07:26,893 --> 00:07:30,140
Someone... that I have known.
150
00:07:30,149 --> 00:07:32,360
- Was it Pete or Mike?
- No.
151
00:07:32,362 --> 00:07:36,206
God. Do you even have any sense
of who those people are?
152
00:07:39,084 --> 00:07:41,379
How could you do... like...
153
00:07:41,380 --> 00:07:44,800
I mean, this feels fuckin'
really, really bad.
154
00:07:44,804 --> 00:07:47,099
- Yeah. Yeah.
- I feel insane right now.
155
00:07:47,100 --> 00:07:48,850
I hate this!
156
00:07:48,854 --> 00:07:52,310
OK, well, don't you think that
that's exactly how I felt
157
00:07:52,318 --> 00:07:54,110
when I saw you with that pencil girl?
158
00:07:54,114 --> 00:07:56,934
I mean, I felt like shit,
and now you feel like shit.
159
00:07:56,935 --> 00:07:58,728
OK, let's call it even.
160
00:07:58,729 --> 00:08:03,274
No, because I can't keep fucking
doing this half-ass thing with you.
161
00:08:03,275 --> 00:08:06,610
I mean, we've been through
this, truly, a million times,
162
00:08:06,611 --> 00:08:09,470
and you keep coming after
me, but... but honestly,
163
00:08:09,477 --> 00:08:12,609
if you don't see me as someone
who you want as a girlfriend,
164
00:08:12,610 --> 00:08:15,780
then I don't know what we're doing here.
165
00:08:15,782 --> 00:08:19,329
I don't know what I want,
OK? But I fuckin' hate this.
166
00:08:19,330 --> 00:08:20,619
This feels terrible.
167
00:08:20,620 --> 00:08:22,960
Yeah, well, you made it like this.
168
00:08:22,963 --> 00:08:25,469
- You did this. I gotta go.
- I didn't...
169
00:08:25,470 --> 00:08:27,480
I didn't know that I did...
170
00:08:31,396 --> 00:08:32,599
Annie, come on.
171
00:08:32,600 --> 00:08:34,299
I don't know, it was kinda sad,
172
00:08:34,300 --> 00:08:37,199
he, like, tracked me down, you know?
173
00:08:37,200 --> 00:08:38,980
And that's what I
honestly can't believe.
174
00:08:38,990 --> 00:08:40,186
He came to my work.
175
00:08:40,187 --> 00:08:41,870
- No Ryan.
- What?
176
00:08:41,876 --> 00:08:44,080
I can't even talk about
how I blew him off?
177
00:08:44,089 --> 00:08:46,510
No, because talking about him
could lead to more obsessing,
178
00:08:46,511 --> 00:08:48,889
- and we can't take that risk.
- Hmm.
179
00:08:48,890 --> 00:08:50,613
Oh, God. What is that?
180
00:08:50,614 --> 00:08:54,400
The ATM girl gave me
micro-dose shroom pills.
181
00:08:54,401 --> 00:08:56,900
- I've taken like 20.
- OK, but what is it?
182
00:08:56,906 --> 00:08:58,442
It's just like a mini-dose of shrooms,
183
00:08:58,443 --> 00:08:59,910
it gives you like a really chill vibe.
184
00:08:59,912 --> 00:09:01,700
Yeah, but you took 20.
185
00:09:01,708 --> 00:09:03,750
Yeah, because I flirt
better when I'm high.
186
00:09:03,753 --> 00:09:06,140
- Macro-dose, baby.
- Oh, God.
187
00:09:07,678 --> 00:09:09,550
Are you sure you're not gonna be hot?
188
00:09:09,557 --> 00:09:11,419
Well, I don't want to get a sunburn.
189
00:09:11,420 --> 00:09:13,310
Plus, you know, I'm
here as a journalist.
190
00:09:13,314 --> 00:09:16,097
It would be unprofessional
for me to wear a swimsuit.
191
00:09:16,098 --> 00:09:19,809
And I gotta be at Forced Fun
in a couple hours, you know?
192
00:09:19,810 --> 00:09:23,540
... it's hard to control. I get
it when you feel emotional,
193
00:09:23,543 --> 00:09:26,040
- but at the same time, it's too much.
- Yeah, honestly.
194
00:09:27,760 --> 00:09:31,230
- Holy shit.
- Fucking hell.
195
00:09:54,605 --> 00:09:57,200
- Who is that girl?
- Have fun!
196
00:10:00,241 --> 00:10:02,420
She's so hot.
197
00:10:03,790 --> 00:10:06,480
- I have to know her.
- Let me just get my bearings
198
00:10:06,481 --> 00:10:07,790
for a sec, OK?
199
00:10:07,798 --> 00:10:09,810
Just... going...
200
00:10:12,516 --> 00:10:14,470
- Hi. I'm Fran.
- Hi.
201
00:10:14,477 --> 00:10:17,810
- My friend, Annie.
- Jeans to a pool party.
202
00:10:17,818 --> 00:10:19,190
Bold choice. I like it.
203
00:10:19,195 --> 00:10:22,990
Oh, yeah, I, uh... I like
jeans, so I'm wearin' 'em.
204
00:10:22,995 --> 00:10:26,590
Um, wow, I'm actually...
205
00:10:26,600 --> 00:10:28,039
the reason I'm here is 'cause
206
00:10:28,040 --> 00:10:29,830
I'm here from The Weekly Thorn.
207
00:10:29,838 --> 00:10:32,090
Oh, yes, of course. Annie.
208
00:10:32,096 --> 00:10:34,425
I know who you are.
This... this is my event.
209
00:10:34,426 --> 00:10:37,553
Thank you so much for
signal-boosting it on the calendar.
210
00:10:37,554 --> 00:10:38,810
You know, I actually sent it to you,
211
00:10:38,818 --> 00:10:41,348
because I fucking loved
your strip club article.
212
00:10:41,349 --> 00:10:42,860
Thank you so much!
213
00:10:42,868 --> 00:10:45,370
Um... that's so nice. How long...
214
00:10:45,372 --> 00:10:46,770
how long have you had this event?
215
00:10:46,771 --> 00:10:50,024
Gosh, this is our third year, and
it just keeps getting bigger.
216
00:10:50,025 --> 00:10:52,469
Wow. Well, I love this.
217
00:10:52,470 --> 00:10:53,680
I-I really support
218
00:10:53,690 --> 00:10:55,810
everything that's happening
right now. It's amazing.
219
00:10:55,811 --> 00:10:57,770
Yeah. You're so beautiful.
220
00:10:57,773 --> 00:10:59,149
- Oh.
- You're like the sun.
221
00:10:59,150 --> 00:11:01,620
I'm very high.
222
00:11:02,866 --> 00:11:04,319
Do you guys want to get in the pool?
223
00:11:04,320 --> 00:11:06,919
- Yes. I want to get in the pool.
- OK, let's do it.
224
00:11:06,920 --> 00:11:08,580
You guys go ahead. I'm...
225
00:11:08,586 --> 00:11:09,629
I'm gonna...
226
00:11:09,630 --> 00:11:13,140
just... I'm gonna check
shit out and hang.
227
00:11:13,798 --> 00:11:15,350
Whoo!
228
00:11:20,157 --> 00:11:23,160
# You make my worries disappear #
229
00:11:24,535 --> 00:11:26,580
# You got it, I want it #
230
00:11:26,581 --> 00:11:28,830
# Why would I control it? #
231
00:11:28,835 --> 00:11:31,430
# You could give it all to me #
232
00:11:32,651 --> 00:11:34,720
# You speak to my senses #
233
00:11:34,722 --> 00:11:36,890
# I scream till I surface #
234
00:11:36,893 --> 00:11:38,600
# Don't know what's reality #
235
00:11:38,605 --> 00:11:39,990
Oh.
236
00:11:41,861 --> 00:11:43,620
- Hi.
- Hi.
237
00:11:48,373 --> 00:11:52,130
# I want those sweet lips on me again #
238
00:11:55,471 --> 00:11:57,470
# Just a little bit #
239
00:11:57,500 --> 00:11:59,520
# Just a little bit #
240
00:11:59,550 --> 00:12:01,600
# Just a little bit #
241
00:12:01,630 --> 00:12:03,650
# Just a little bit #
242
00:12:03,690 --> 00:12:05,700
# Just a little bit #
243
00:12:05,730 --> 00:12:07,530
# Just a little bit #
244
00:12:07,550 --> 00:12:09,620
# Just a little bit #
245
00:12:09,625 --> 00:12:12,880
# Just a little bit, just #
246
00:12:12,881 --> 00:12:16,550
# I'll be your wildfire, ooh #
247
00:12:16,555 --> 00:12:20,600
# Got them chills up
and down your spine #
248
00:12:20,605 --> 00:12:24,650
# I'm like a body high, high #
249
00:12:24,655 --> 00:12:28,910
# I'll be the only
drug you need, oh... #
250
00:12:33,171 --> 00:12:35,629
Hi! Could I get a margarita?
251
00:12:35,630 --> 00:12:38,799
- Yeah, you want the frozen one?
- Oh... maybe.
252
00:12:38,800 --> 00:12:41,430
They're really good. That's what I got.
253
00:12:41,438 --> 00:12:44,472
- OK, shit, I'll do it.
- Yeah? OK.
254
00:12:46,114 --> 00:12:47,933
I, uh, I love your skirt.
255
00:12:47,934 --> 00:12:50,580
Oh! Thanks. It's my friend's line.
256
00:12:50,582 --> 00:12:52,062
I wear it, like, every day.
257
00:12:52,063 --> 00:12:54,589
Yeah, that's... that's like exactly
what I'm always looking for,
258
00:12:54,590 --> 00:12:56,300
just like a plain, good skirt.
259
00:12:56,301 --> 00:12:59,820
I know, but it's so hard trying
to find plus-size basics.
260
00:12:59,821 --> 00:13:04,520
I know, everything is either,
like, a big Indiana Walmart sack
261
00:13:04,526 --> 00:13:07,990
or it's, like, some cutesy
shit covered in, like,
262
00:13:07,991 --> 00:13:10,700
Eiffel Tower postage stamps or whatever.
263
00:13:10,705 --> 00:13:12,540
God.
264
00:13:12,542 --> 00:13:14,580
Oh, my friend who makes
the skirts is here.
265
00:13:14,588 --> 00:13:16,590
- Do you want to meet her?
- Um, yes.
266
00:13:18,214 --> 00:13:20,510
It's so cool that she
like, has her own line.
267
00:13:20,517 --> 00:13:22,470
Hey, Mary. This is Annie.
268
00:13:22,478 --> 00:13:25,700
- Hey.
- Nice to meet you.
269
00:13:26,444 --> 00:13:27,830
Oh, cool.
270
00:13:28,641 --> 00:13:29,850
# And I know and I know and I know #
271
00:13:29,851 --> 00:13:31,450
# That you got everything #
272
00:13:31,454 --> 00:13:33,499
# But I got nothing here without you #
273
00:13:33,500 --> 00:13:35,790
# Oh, baby #
274
00:13:35,797 --> 00:13:39,050
# So one last time #
275
00:13:39,053 --> 00:13:42,180
- # I need to be the one #
- Come on! Everyone's dancing!
276
00:13:42,184 --> 00:13:44,020
# Who takes you home #
277
00:13:44,021 --> 00:13:46,770
# One more time #
278
00:13:46,777 --> 00:13:49,610
# I promise after that #
279
00:13:49,616 --> 00:13:52,370
- # I'll let you go #
- Come on!
280
00:13:52,371 --> 00:13:54,499
- # Baby, I don't care if you got her #
- OK.
281
00:13:54,500 --> 00:13:55,830
# In your heart #
282
00:13:55,837 --> 00:13:59,359
# All I really care is
you wake up in my arms #
283
00:13:59,360 --> 00:14:01,880
# One last time #
284
00:14:01,883 --> 00:14:07,240
# I need to be the one
who takes you home #
285
00:14:10,700 --> 00:14:15,340
# I know I should've fought it,
at least I'm being honest #
286
00:14:18,280 --> 00:14:23,940
# But stay with me a minute, I
swear I'll make it worth it, hey #
287
00:14:25,062 --> 00:14:28,400
# 'Cause I don't wanna be without ya #
288
00:14:29,780 --> 00:14:32,740
# So one last time #
289
00:14:32,744 --> 00:14:36,125
# I need to be the one #
290
00:14:36,126 --> 00:14:37,750
# Who takes you home #
291
00:14:37,754 --> 00:14:40,460
# One more time #
292
00:14:40,467 --> 00:14:43,590
# I promise after that #
293
00:14:43,599 --> 00:14:45,769
# I'll let you go #
294
00:14:45,770 --> 00:14:49,388
# Baby, I don't care if you
got her in your heart #
295
00:14:49,389 --> 00:14:53,240
# All I really care is
you wake up in my arms #
296
00:14:53,243 --> 00:14:55,870
# One last time #
297
00:14:55,873 --> 00:14:58,814
# I need to be the one #
298
00:14:58,815 --> 00:15:00,608
# Who takes you home, yeah #
299
00:15:01,927 --> 00:15:03,930
Hey!
300
00:15:03,931 --> 00:15:06,519
Oh, my God, it is so hot out here,
301
00:15:06,520 --> 00:15:08,519
but I'm not even mad about it, honestly.
302
00:15:08,520 --> 00:15:10,439
I'm just having so much fun!
303
00:15:10,440 --> 00:15:12,820
- I'm having the time of my life.
- Good!
304
00:15:12,824 --> 00:15:14,990
- That's what this is all about.
- I know!
305
00:15:14,995 --> 00:15:17,369
Oh, my God, I've met so many
people, and I'm honestly thinking
306
00:15:17,370 --> 00:15:19,160
about buying a crop-top,
which I gotta say
307
00:15:19,170 --> 00:15:21,462
was not in the cards for me before,
308
00:15:21,463 --> 00:15:23,310
but I just gotta get in that pool.
309
00:16:08,843 --> 00:16:11,269
Yeah, this is good.
310
00:16:11,270 --> 00:16:12,840
Yay!
311
00:16:15,320 --> 00:16:18,320
- Yes, yes.
- So stupid.
312
00:16:18,329 --> 00:16:20,619
They'll be bad, I know it.
313
00:16:20,620 --> 00:16:22,560
- OK, tell me...
- They're good.
314
00:16:22,570 --> 00:16:24,339
Really? Are they good or are they bad?
315
00:16:24,340 --> 00:16:25,460
They're really fun.
316
00:16:25,470 --> 00:16:26,970
Oh, my God, you look really good!
317
00:16:26,972 --> 00:16:28,399
OK.
318
00:16:28,400 --> 00:16:30,770
- _
- Oh, fuck!
319
00:16:30,771 --> 00:16:33,770
Shit! I was supposed to be
at Forced Fun two hours ago.
320
00:16:33,777 --> 00:16:35,440
God damn it!
321
00:16:35,447 --> 00:16:38,770
OK, I can get dressed. Shit!
322
00:16:44,423 --> 00:16:46,760
- Hi!
- Annie.
323
00:16:46,762 --> 00:16:49,049
What's up, dude? You
look like a drowned rat.
324
00:16:49,050 --> 00:16:50,059
I know. I went...
325
00:16:50,060 --> 00:16:51,890
- I went to a pool party.
- Yeah?
326
00:16:51,897 --> 00:16:53,470
And then I just lost track of time.
327
00:16:53,471 --> 00:16:56,345
- Oh. How was it?
- I mean, amazing, honestly.
328
00:16:56,346 --> 00:16:58,740
- Like, maybe the best day of my life.
- Oh, cool.
329
00:16:58,750 --> 00:17:01,410
Yeah. Oh, hey, Gabe! Hey, Tony!
330
00:17:01,415 --> 00:17:04,879
Oh, wow, Annie. Only two hours late.
331
00:17:04,880 --> 00:17:06,499
- It's totally fine.
- You know what,
332
00:17:06,500 --> 00:17:09,720
he says that it's fine, but I
can assure you, it's not fine.
333
00:17:09,975 --> 00:17:12,019
I... I got that, Tony. Thank you.
334
00:17:12,020 --> 00:17:14,819
- Lazy bodies, lazy minds.
- Exactly.
335
00:17:14,820 --> 00:17:17,870
I'm sorry, was... was
that directed to me?
336
00:17:19,493 --> 00:17:21,660
Annie, can we... talk in private?
337
00:17:21,665 --> 00:17:24,510
Sure. Of course.
338
00:17:25,881 --> 00:17:27,550
Look, I'm...
339
00:17:27,552 --> 00:17:29,840
I don't want to embarrass you
in front of everybody...
340
00:17:29,841 --> 00:17:32,092
Yeah, Gabe, I'm really sorry.
341
00:17:32,093 --> 00:17:34,060
Annie, your article was great,
342
00:17:34,064 --> 00:17:36,270
but writing is not all
about glamor, you know,
343
00:17:36,277 --> 00:17:38,150
sometimes it's about doin'
shit you don't want to do
344
00:17:38,160 --> 00:17:39,990
- and getting paid in cat food.
- I know,
345
00:17:39,993 --> 00:17:42,160
and I... I really am sorry, I just...
346
00:17:42,164 --> 00:17:45,814
I wasn't thinking, but I do...
I take work very seriously.
347
00:17:45,815 --> 00:17:48,800
Good. But you also know
that the health focus
348
00:17:48,802 --> 00:17:51,300
requires us to take the
burden off the company
349
00:17:51,307 --> 00:17:54,180
by taking care of ourselves.
350
00:17:54,188 --> 00:17:56,310
OK, what does that mean?
351
00:17:56,317 --> 00:17:58,703
There's... a sloppiness...
352
00:18:00,785 --> 00:18:03,539
Like I said, "lazy
bodies, lazy minds... "
353
00:18:03,540 --> 00:18:05,710
it's kind of where our
nation is going right now.
354
00:18:05,711 --> 00:18:07,330
I mean, we can't get out
of our fuckin' heads
355
00:18:07,339 --> 00:18:10,255
to get off our screens
and get up and do shit.
356
00:18:10,256 --> 00:18:12,720
I'm not sure what you're
trying to say specifically.
357
00:18:12,725 --> 00:18:14,092
Like, about my health?
358
00:18:14,093 --> 00:18:17,149
All I'm saying is that
everybody else showed up
359
00:18:17,150 --> 00:18:18,840
with their bikes on time.
360
00:18:18,850 --> 00:18:20,974
And guess who didn't.
361
00:18:20,975 --> 00:18:23,490
Success is about an effort.
362
00:18:23,496 --> 00:18:26,271
I succeed because I try. I try
every day, I try every way.
363
00:18:26,272 --> 00:18:28,630
OK, well, I do try.
364
00:18:28,632 --> 00:18:30,276
You didn't today.
365
00:18:32,500 --> 00:18:33,696
OK.
366
00:18:36,063 --> 00:18:37,390
All done?
367
00:18:37,399 --> 00:18:39,490
Hope you weren't too hard on her.
368
00:18:49,716 --> 00:18:51,588
He implied that...
369
00:18:51,589 --> 00:18:54,383
I need to be less fat to do good work.
370
00:18:54,384 --> 00:18:57,344
God, and it's like, isn't
it already bad enough
371
00:18:57,345 --> 00:19:02,070
that he is constantly writing
about the obesity epidemic
372
00:19:02,073 --> 00:19:05,699
like it's this...
abstract, far away thing?
373
00:19:05,700 --> 00:19:07,640
When it's, like, that's me. You know?
374
00:19:07,650 --> 00:19:10,379
Like, I'm the obesity
epidemic, and you know me.
375
00:19:10,380 --> 00:19:12,899
You know I was like,
at that event today,
376
00:19:12,900 --> 00:19:14,300
and there were so many people
377
00:19:14,306 --> 00:19:17,390
just like, living in their
bodies and enjoying their life,
378
00:19:17,395 --> 00:19:20,359
and that shit was
un-fuckin'-believable to me.
379
00:19:20,360 --> 00:19:24,150
And also, it's like, "OK, cool, man.
380
00:19:24,159 --> 00:19:28,040
Really fuckin' cool. Very
original point. No shit."
381
00:19:28,042 --> 00:19:30,839
You don't think the whole world
isn't constantly telling me
382
00:19:30,840 --> 00:19:33,505
that I'm a fat piece of
shit who doesn't try hard?
383
00:19:33,506 --> 00:19:36,680
Every fuckin' magazine, and commercial,
384
00:19:36,685 --> 00:19:40,600
and weird, targeted ads telling
me to freeze my fat off
385
00:19:40,609 --> 00:19:45,475
or to drink a tea so that I'll
shit my brain out my ass?
386
00:19:45,476 --> 00:19:48,950
And at this point, I could be a
licensed fucking nutritionist,
387
00:19:48,959 --> 00:19:52,065
because I've literally been training
for it since the fourth grade,
388
00:19:52,066 --> 00:19:55,760
which... is the first
time that my mom said
389
00:19:55,764 --> 00:19:59,390
that I should just eat
a bowl of Special K
390
00:19:59,396 --> 00:20:03,020
and not the dinner that she
made for everyone else...
391
00:20:03,029 --> 00:20:06,320
so that I might be a little bit smaller,
392
00:20:06,327 --> 00:20:08,840
and so that she could fuckin'...
393
00:20:09,584 --> 00:20:11,369
I could have boys like me.
394
00:20:11,370 --> 00:20:12,659
My mom said that to me, too.
395
00:20:12,660 --> 00:20:15,010
I... honestly, I don't even blame her,
396
00:20:15,011 --> 00:20:17,389
because...
397
00:20:17,390 --> 00:20:19,969
because it's a fucking
mind prison, you know?
398
00:20:19,970 --> 00:20:22,300
That every fuckin' woman everywhere
399
00:20:22,310 --> 00:20:25,150
has been programmed
to believe, you know?
400
00:20:25,156 --> 00:20:29,620
And I've wasted so much time and
energy and money, for what?
401
00:20:29,624 --> 00:20:33,040
For what?! You know?
I'm fat! I'm fuckin' fat!
402
00:20:33,047 --> 00:20:35,550
Hello! I'm fat, you know?
403
00:20:35,552 --> 00:20:38,220
Yeah. I wish someone would've said
this to me when I was younger.
404
00:20:38,224 --> 00:20:40,100
Me, too.
405
00:20:40,103 --> 00:20:44,270
Because it would have
saved me so much time...
406
00:20:44,277 --> 00:20:46,120
and pain.
407
00:20:56,005 --> 00:20:57,879
And I-I don't want to
leave on that note.
408
00:20:57,880 --> 00:21:00,850
I just wanna say that I actually
did have a very lovely day
409
00:21:00,853 --> 00:21:02,980
and it was... very fun.
410
00:21:02,982 --> 00:21:04,780
I had so much fun.
411
00:21:07,780 --> 00:21:11,780
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