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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:16,266 --> 00:00:18,166 ( theme music playing ) 2 00:00:18,166 --> 00:00:19,796 Kid Capri: IT'S THE ONE AND ONLY 3 00:00:19,800 --> 00:00:22,100 RUSSELL SIMMONS' DEF COMEDY JAM! 4 00:00:22,100 --> 00:00:25,030 WITH YOUR HOST, MIKE EPPS. 5 00:00:26,033 --> 00:00:28,303 TONIGHT'S GUESTS-- TONY ROCK, 6 00:00:28,300 --> 00:00:31,600 SOMMORE, AND CAPONE. 7 00:00:34,266 --> 00:00:36,966 I AM YOUR MAN, THE WORLD'S GREATEST DJ-- 8 00:00:36,967 --> 00:00:38,897 THE KID CAPRI. 9 00:00:38,900 --> 00:00:41,070 AND WE ARE BACK! 10 00:00:42,367 --> 00:00:44,467 AND NOW THE HOST-- 11 00:00:44,467 --> 00:00:46,267 MIKE EPPS! 12 00:00:54,166 --> 00:00:56,026 YEAH! 13 00:00:57,066 --> 00:00:59,966 GO SIT DOWN, GO SIT DOWN! 14 00:01:06,867 --> 00:01:10,697 GO SIT DOWN, GO SIT DOWN, GO SIT DOWN! 15 00:01:10,700 --> 00:01:13,000 ONE MORE TIME FOR THE BADDEST DJ EVER-- 16 00:01:13,000 --> 00:01:15,100 KID CAPRI! 17 00:01:19,734 --> 00:01:22,904 WHAT'S UP L.A., WHAT'S UP, L.A.? 18 00:01:24,934 --> 00:01:27,504 WHERE'S SOUTH CENTRAL AT? SOUTH CENTRAL! 19 00:01:27,500 --> 00:01:30,300 ( cheering ) 20 00:01:30,300 --> 00:01:32,470 WHERE COMPTON AT? COMPTON, WHERE-- 21 00:01:33,867 --> 00:01:36,867 WHERE LONG BEACH AT? LONG BEACH! 22 00:01:36,867 --> 00:01:39,167 WHERE INGLEWOOD? INGLEWOOD! 23 00:01:40,166 --> 00:01:42,826 AW, SHIT, LET ME FIND MY WALLET, 24 00:01:42,834 --> 00:01:44,974 THEY ALL IN THE HOUSE. 25 00:01:46,400 --> 00:01:49,530 Y'ALL LIVE IN SOME ROUGH-ASS NEIGHBORHOODS. SHIT! 26 00:01:49,533 --> 00:01:52,373 I SEEN A NIGGA WALKING A RAT IN COMPTON ONE DAY-- 27 00:01:52,367 --> 00:01:53,827 NIGGA HAD A RAT! 28 00:01:53,834 --> 00:01:57,104 NIGGA HAD A BIG RAT JUST PULLING HIM AROUND, LIKE THIS. 29 00:01:57,100 --> 00:01:59,330 ( groaning ) 30 00:02:01,600 --> 00:02:04,000 TAIL JUST-- ( growls ) 31 00:02:05,133 --> 00:02:07,603 Y'ALL LOOKIN' GOOD AS HELL UP IN HERE. 32 00:02:07,600 --> 00:02:09,900 SHIT, TOP FLIGHT SECURITY IS IN HERE 33 00:02:09,900 --> 00:02:12,370 WATCHING EVERYTHING. 34 00:02:13,533 --> 00:02:15,373 READY TO BLOW A WHISTLE 35 00:02:15,367 --> 00:02:17,797 ON ONE OF THESE BITCHES! 36 00:02:19,133 --> 00:02:21,873 FOR REAL, BOSS, SHIT-- ALL THE LADIES LOOKIN' GOOD, 37 00:02:21,867 --> 00:02:24,097 SHIT, LADIES, DON'T GO TO JAIL. 38 00:02:25,166 --> 00:02:27,226 HEY, IT'S FUCKED UP OUT HERE, MAN, 39 00:02:27,233 --> 00:02:28,933 IT'S CRAZY AS A MOTHERFUCKER. 40 00:02:28,934 --> 00:02:31,434 THEY LOCKIN' EVERYBODY'S ASS UP. 41 00:02:31,433 --> 00:02:33,103 MY GRANDMOTHER TWO-FACED IT, 42 00:02:33,100 --> 00:02:35,500 AND THE MOTHERFUCKER CALLED THE POLICE. 43 00:02:37,367 --> 00:02:39,227 YEAH, JUST TWO-FACED IT. 44 00:02:39,233 --> 00:02:40,933 CALLED THE POLICE ON EVERYBODY IN THE HOOD, 45 00:02:40,934 --> 00:02:42,734 AND THEN COME DOWN THERE WITH A NIGHTGOWN, 46 00:02:42,734 --> 00:02:45,104 "WHAT HAPPENED? WHAT'S GOING ON DOWN HERE?" 47 00:02:46,300 --> 00:02:48,800 YOU KNOW WHAT THE FUCK IS GOIN' ON DOWN HERE! 48 00:02:50,367 --> 00:02:53,067 YOU CALLED THE PO-- "I DIDN'T CALL, THEY BEEN ON Y'ALL, SHIT. 49 00:02:53,066 --> 00:02:55,166 DON'T PUT IT ON ME! 50 00:02:55,166 --> 00:02:57,626 THEY BEEN WATCHING Y'ALL." 51 00:02:59,233 --> 00:03:01,973 MY GRANDMOTHER THINKS SHE KNOWS ABOUT EVERYBODY THAT'S COPPIN'. 52 00:03:01,967 --> 00:03:03,667 "YOU KNOW, TONY GETTIN' TWO POUNDS." 53 00:03:03,667 --> 00:03:06,567 "NOW HOW THE FUCK YOU KNOW HOW MUCH DOPE TONY GETTIN'?" 54 00:03:06,567 --> 00:03:08,627 "'CAUSE HE'S SUPPOSED TO BE FRONTIN' ME A QUARTER OF IT. 55 00:03:08,633 --> 00:03:10,573 THAT'S HOW I KNOW HOW MUCH DOPE!" 56 00:03:14,000 --> 00:03:15,630 THERE-- IT'S FUCKED UP, MAN. 57 00:03:15,633 --> 00:03:18,233 LOOK AT YOU, WE GOT SOME COOL MOTHERFUCKERS IN THE HOUSE, SHIT. 58 00:03:19,800 --> 00:03:22,970 LOOK, I MEAN WHAT THE FUCK HAS THIS NIGGA GOT ON? 59 00:03:26,600 --> 00:03:29,900 BAM! BAM! 60 00:03:29,900 --> 00:03:32,030 THAT'S THAT SHIT, THAT'S THAT SHIT! 61 00:03:33,967 --> 00:03:37,327 I WOULD LOVE TO GO CANOEING IN THAT LITTLE VEST RIGHT THERE 62 00:03:39,500 --> 00:03:42,430 ( singing children's song ) 63 00:03:47,300 --> 00:03:49,030 GOT SOME COOL-LOOKIN' MOTHERFUCKERS AN' ALL. 64 00:03:49,033 --> 00:03:51,203 LOOK, A WHITE GUY OVER THERE-- WHAT'S GOIN' ON, WHITE GUY? 65 00:03:51,200 --> 00:03:52,600 WHAT'S HAPPENING WITH YOU, BABY? 66 00:03:52,600 --> 00:03:55,930 WHAT'S GOIN' ON WITH YOU, DUDE? COME ON, MAN! 67 00:03:55,934 --> 00:03:57,974 FUCK IT, COME ON, DUDE! 68 00:03:59,867 --> 00:04:01,797 WHY DO WHITE DUDES DO THAT WITH THEIR LEG-- 69 00:04:01,800 --> 00:04:03,470 "MAN, FUCK IT, COME ON!" 70 00:04:03,467 --> 00:04:05,097 "FUCK IT, COME ON, MAN!" 71 00:04:08,033 --> 00:04:10,633 I LIKE WHITE PEOPLE, 'CAUSE YOU CAN BORROW MONEY FROM THEM, 72 00:04:10,633 --> 00:04:12,633 AND DON'T NEVER GIVE IT BACK. 73 00:04:13,967 --> 00:04:16,797 I GOT A COUPLE FRIENDS I OWE SOME MONEY-- ( laughs ) 74 00:04:16,800 --> 00:04:18,800 YOU BORROW MONEY FROM A WHITE DUDE-- "YOU GOT $20?" 75 00:04:18,800 --> 00:04:20,600 "YEAH, I GOT IT. WHEN YOU GONNA GIVE IT BACK? 76 00:04:20,600 --> 00:04:22,370 HERE, TAKE IT." 77 00:04:23,767 --> 00:04:26,027 YOU BORROW MONEY FROM A NIGGA, HE GONNA BE AT YOUR HOUSE 78 00:04:26,033 --> 00:04:28,633 WAITING ON YOU. 79 00:04:28,633 --> 00:04:30,733 SOON AS YOU PULL UP, NIGGA SITTING ON YOUR PORCH. 80 00:04:30,734 --> 00:04:32,834 "HEY, WHAT'S HAPPENING, MAN?" 81 00:04:33,767 --> 00:04:35,497 "NOTHING, WHAT'S UP WITH YOU?" 82 00:04:35,500 --> 00:04:38,270 "NOTHING. CHECKING ON THAT LI'L $20 I GAVE YOU EARLIER." 83 00:04:38,266 --> 00:04:40,896 Y'ALL READY FOR THIS SHIT?! COME ON, PUT YOUR HANDS TOGETHER! 84 00:04:40,900 --> 00:04:44,670 - PUT YOUR-- - ( Kid Capri scratches record ) 85 00:04:45,834 --> 00:04:47,874 COMING TO THE STAGE, HE'S ONE OF THE STARS 86 00:04:47,867 --> 00:04:50,197 ON THE HIT SHOW ON UPN, "ALL OF US," 87 00:04:50,200 --> 00:04:52,630 MAKING HIS "DEF COMEDY JAM" DEBUT, 88 00:04:52,633 --> 00:04:54,473 GIVE IT UP, FOR NEW YORK'S OWN 89 00:04:54,467 --> 00:04:56,297 TONY ROCK! COME ON, Y'ALL! 90 00:05:02,867 --> 00:05:05,127 WHAT UP, L.A.? 91 00:05:06,300 --> 00:05:08,630 WHAT'S GOIN' ON? 92 00:05:08,633 --> 00:05:11,203 WHAT'S THE DEAL, Y'ALL? WHAT'S GOING ON? 93 00:05:11,200 --> 00:05:12,900 L.A., I LOVE THIS TOWN. I'M A NEW YORKER, 94 00:05:12,900 --> 00:05:14,770 BUT I'M STARTIN' TO LOVE THIS TOWN, MAN. 95 00:05:14,767 --> 00:05:16,497 BEAUTIFUL WOMEN, BEAUTIFUL WEATHER. 96 00:05:16,500 --> 00:05:18,330 BEAUTIFUL WEATHER! IT DON'T GET TOO HOT HERE-- 97 00:05:18,333 --> 00:05:20,033 I CAN'T TAKE IT WHEN IT GET TOO HOT. 98 00:05:20,033 --> 00:05:21,703 I SEE WHITE PEOPLE. I KNOW YOU ALL THINK 99 00:05:21,700 --> 00:05:24,000 WE CAN TAKE THE HEAT. THAT'S A FUCKIN' MYTH, OKAY? 100 00:05:24,000 --> 00:05:27,230 HEAT MAKES NIGGAS VIOLENT! 101 00:05:27,233 --> 00:05:29,133 WHY YOU THINK THERE'S A WAR GOING ON IN AFRICA 102 00:05:29,133 --> 00:05:30,933 FOR AS LONG AS YOU CAN REMEMBER? 103 00:05:30,934 --> 00:05:33,174 THEY JUST WAKE UP EVERY MORNING-- 104 00:05:33,166 --> 00:05:34,966 "HOT AGAIN?" 105 00:05:37,100 --> 00:05:39,030 "I SWEAR, I'M GOING TO KILL SOMEONE!" 106 00:05:40,000 --> 00:05:42,400 "SOMEONE WILL DIE TODAY!" 107 00:05:43,533 --> 00:05:45,433 CAN'T TAKE IT WHEN IT GET TOO HOT, MAN! 108 00:05:45,433 --> 00:05:48,373 ANOTHER THING I HAD TO GET USED TO IN L.A.? THE DIFFERENT ETHNICITIES-- 109 00:05:48,367 --> 00:05:49,997 HAD TO GET USED TO IT. I'M FROM BROOKLYN-- 110 00:05:50,000 --> 00:05:51,700 BLACKS, WHITES, PUERTO RICANS, THAT'S IT! 111 00:05:51,700 --> 00:05:54,070 THAT'S IT! I COME TO L.A.-- 112 00:05:54,066 --> 00:05:55,626 BLACKS, WHITES, ASIANS, PERSIANS-- 113 00:05:55,633 --> 00:05:58,673 WHAT THE FUCK IS A ARMENIAN? 114 00:06:00,433 --> 00:06:02,233 I THOUGHT THAT SHIT WAS A SUIT! 115 00:06:03,934 --> 00:06:07,504 I'M IN A CLUB, "NIGGA IS YOUR HANDS CLEAN? THIS IS ARMENIAN, NIGGA!" 116 00:06:09,900 --> 00:06:12,830 AND MEXICANS-- HAD TO GET USED TO THE MEXICANS ALL OVER THE FUCKIN' PLACE. 117 00:06:12,834 --> 00:06:16,104 THAT'S GETTIN' READY TO CHANGE, THEY TRYING TO KICK Y'ALL OUT THE COUNTRY. 118 00:06:16,100 --> 00:06:18,570 THAT'S SOME BULLSHIT, I DISAGREE. THAT'S BULLSHIT. 119 00:06:18,567 --> 00:06:21,327 HOW YOU GONNA KICK THE HARDEST-WORKING PEOPLE ON THE PLANET 120 00:06:21,333 --> 00:06:23,133 OUT OF THE COUNTRY? RIGHT? 121 00:06:24,200 --> 00:06:26,370 ANY MEXICANS IN HERE? 122 00:06:26,367 --> 00:06:29,127 SEE? THEY ALL AT WORK! 123 00:06:30,233 --> 00:06:32,373 THEY GOT NO TIME FOR NO DEF JAM! 124 00:06:34,400 --> 00:06:36,100 HARDEST-WORKING PEOPLE ON THE PLANT. 125 00:06:36,100 --> 00:06:38,030 MEXICANS WORK SO HARD. JAMAICANS ARE LIKE, 126 00:06:38,033 --> 00:06:40,673 ( Jamaican accent ) "HEY, MON! 127 00:06:40,667 --> 00:06:43,097 TAKE IT EASY! 128 00:06:45,066 --> 00:06:47,196 'EM WORK TOO HARD." 129 00:06:47,200 --> 00:06:49,230 SNEAK INTO THE COUNTRY SUNDAY NIGHT, 130 00:06:49,233 --> 00:06:51,373 WORKING MONDAY MORNING. 131 00:06:51,367 --> 00:06:53,027 THEY JUST HANG OUT ON THE CORNER LOOKING FOR WORK. 132 00:06:53,033 --> 00:06:55,333 CARS GOING BY-- "HEY, MY FRIEND, WE WORK FOR YOU, WE WORK FOR YOU! 133 00:06:57,166 --> 00:07:00,426 HEY, MY FRIEND, YOU NEED WORK, WE WORK FOR YOU, MY FRIEND." 134 00:07:00,433 --> 00:07:02,403 WHATEVER YOU NEED, YOU COULD JUST MAKE SOME SHIT UP. 135 00:07:02,400 --> 00:07:04,030 PULL UP IN IN A PICKUP TRUCK-- "HEY, I NEED FOUR OF Y'ALL 136 00:07:04,033 --> 00:07:06,073 TO HELP ME BUILD A SPACESHIP." 137 00:07:07,333 --> 00:07:08,873 NO QUESTIONS ASKED, THEY IN YOUR TRUCK. 138 00:07:08,867 --> 00:07:10,767 "LET'S GO, HOMES!" 139 00:07:10,767 --> 00:07:14,127 ( sings ) "WE GONNA BUILD A SPACESHIP, WE GONNA BUILD A SPACESHIP!" 140 00:07:16,900 --> 00:07:19,630 NO TOOLS! ONE GUY WITH A SCREWDRIVER-- 141 00:07:19,633 --> 00:07:22,503 "I GO LIKE THIS WITH THIS! I DO LIKE THIS WITH THIS! 142 00:07:22,500 --> 00:07:24,830 I DO LIKE THIS WITH THIS!" 143 00:07:24,834 --> 00:07:27,274 FIRST OF ALL, THE WHOLE ARGUMENT FOR KICKING THEM OUT 144 00:07:27,266 --> 00:07:29,526 DON'T MAKE NO FUCKIN' SENSE. IT'S JUST WHITE PEOPLE-- 145 00:07:29,533 --> 00:07:32,533 "THEY'RE COMING IN THE COUNTRY AND THEY'RE STEALING JOBS!" 146 00:07:33,900 --> 00:07:37,030 EVERYBODY IN THIS FUCKING COUNTRY IS HERE ILLEGALLY. 147 00:07:37,033 --> 00:07:39,903 EVERYBODY HERE'S HERE ILLEGALLY! 148 00:07:41,333 --> 00:07:44,003 EVEN THE WHITE PEOPLE. THEY JUST KILLED ALL THE WITNESSES! 149 00:07:46,000 --> 00:07:48,570 AND BLACK PEOPLE, I KNOW Y'ALL KNOW WE DON'T BELONG HERE, 150 00:07:48,567 --> 00:07:50,627 'CAUSE WE CAME HERE AS CARGO. 151 00:07:50,633 --> 00:07:54,273 THEY USED TO SELL US LIKE WE WAS A PAIR OF SHELL TOES! 152 00:07:54,266 --> 00:07:56,366 WALK IN THE STORE, PICK UP A LITTLE NIGGA BABY-- 153 00:07:56,367 --> 00:07:58,567 "HEY, YOU GOT THIS NIGGA IN A 12?" 154 00:08:02,166 --> 00:08:04,596 THAT'S WHY I WANNA SEE MORE BLACK PEOPLE AT THE RALLIES 155 00:08:04,600 --> 00:08:06,200 TO KEEP THE MEXICANS IN THE COUNTRY. 156 00:08:06,200 --> 00:08:09,700 I WANNA SEE MORE BLACK PEOPLE AT THE RALLIES. YES. 157 00:08:09,700 --> 00:08:12,670 'CAUSE IF THEY GET RID OF THE MEXICANS, 158 00:08:12,667 --> 00:08:15,197 WHO THE FUCK YOU THINK IS NEXT? 159 00:08:17,100 --> 00:08:19,730 YOU DON'T THROW AWAY THE CHAIRS AND KEEP THE TABLE. 160 00:08:21,600 --> 00:08:23,570 WHATEVER IT IS, YOU'RE FIGHTING FOR RIGHTS, I'M FIGHTING WITH YOU, 161 00:08:23,567 --> 00:08:25,127 'CAUSE IF THEY TAKE YOUR SHIT, THEY TAKING MY SHIT. 162 00:08:25,133 --> 00:08:26,773 SO WHATEVER IT IS, I'M DOWN WITH THE MEXICANS. 163 00:08:26,767 --> 00:08:28,727 I DON'T EVEN SPEAK SPANISH. I'M JUST WALKING-- 164 00:08:28,734 --> 00:08:31,004 "HEY, TACO, CHIMICHANGA! HEY, CHALUPA!" 165 00:08:32,400 --> 00:08:34,570 WHATEVER IT IS, I DON'T CARE. 166 00:08:34,567 --> 00:08:37,727 I DON'T CARE WHAT IT IS. GAY RIGHTS-- I AIN'T GAY, BUT IF THEY TAKE YOUR SHIT, 167 00:08:37,734 --> 00:08:39,574 THEY TAKING MY SHIT. SO FUCK IT, LET'S MARCH. 168 00:08:39,567 --> 00:08:41,967 JUST DON'T MARCH TOO CLOSE TO ME, MOTHERFUCKER! 169 00:08:43,700 --> 00:08:47,230 I'M MARCHING! "WHAT DO WE WANT? DICKS! WHEN DO WANT 'EM? NOW!" 170 00:08:52,066 --> 00:08:55,366 GAY PEOPLE ARE LIKE, E'RE NOT MARCHING FOR DICKS, ASSHOLE. 171 00:08:56,834 --> 00:08:58,904 BUT WE'LL TAKE 'EM IF YOU GOT 'EM!" 172 00:09:02,633 --> 00:09:04,133 IT'S ALL SUCH BULLSHIT, MAN. 173 00:09:04,133 --> 00:09:06,103 WHITE PEOPLE TRYING TO ACT LIKE THEY OWN THE COUNTRY. 174 00:09:06,100 --> 00:09:08,470 THAT'S WHAT IT'S ALL ABOUT, THEY THINK THEY OWN THE FUCKIN' COUNTRY. 175 00:09:08,467 --> 00:09:11,427 THEY THINK THEY OWN EVERYTHING. JUST WALK DOWN THE STREET-- "THAT'S OURS." 176 00:09:11,433 --> 00:09:13,673 THAT'S OURS TOO. 'SCUSE ME, NIGGER, THAT'S OURS TOO." 177 00:09:15,367 --> 00:09:18,327 SHIT MAKE ME MAD, MAKE ME JEALOUS TOO. I WISH I WAS WHITE SOMETIMES. 178 00:09:18,333 --> 00:09:21,333 I DO. JUST SO I CAN KNOW MY NEIGHBORS. 179 00:09:21,333 --> 00:09:23,033 "HEY, BILL!" "HOW'S IT GOING, BOB?" 180 00:09:24,066 --> 00:09:25,596 THEY FUCKIN' KNOW THEIR NEIGHBORS. 181 00:09:25,600 --> 00:09:27,670 BLACK PEOPLE, WE DON'T KNOW WHO LIVE NEXT DOOR TO US-- 182 00:09:27,667 --> 00:09:29,197 NOT TILL THEY GET ARRESTED. 183 00:09:29,200 --> 00:09:30,900 THEN WE ON THE 11:00 NEWS, LIKE-- 184 00:09:30,900 --> 00:09:33,000 "THAT NIGGA LIVE NEXT DOOR TO ME? 185 00:09:34,934 --> 00:09:37,534 I AIN'T NEVER SEE THAT NIGGA AROUND HERE BEFORE." 186 00:09:37,533 --> 00:09:40,333 NOW WHITE PEOPLE, THEY FUCKIN' KNOW THEIR NEIGHBORS, 'CAUSE THEY NOSY. 187 00:09:40,333 --> 00:09:42,303 ALL IN THE WINDOW, LOOKING AT THE MOTHERFUCKER-- 188 00:09:42,300 --> 00:09:44,800 "LOOK AT BOB. 189 00:09:50,700 --> 00:09:52,730 BOB GOT A NEW JACKET!" 190 00:09:56,834 --> 00:09:58,704 BUT WHITE PEOPLE REALLY DON'T KNOW BLACK PEOPLE. 191 00:09:58,700 --> 00:10:01,170 THAT'S WHY THEY HAVE ALL TYPE OF CRAZY MISCONCEPTIONS ABOUT US. 192 00:10:01,166 --> 00:10:04,026 "ALL BLACK PEOPLE LOOK ALIKE." WHAT? 193 00:10:04,033 --> 00:10:06,503 NO, ALL ASIAN PEOPLE LOOK ALIKE. 194 00:10:09,900 --> 00:10:11,930 DON'T PUT THAT SHIT ON US! 195 00:10:13,633 --> 00:10:15,333 WHAT ELSE THEY SAY ABOUT US? "BLACK PEOPLE ARE LAZY, 196 00:10:15,333 --> 00:10:17,203 THEY DON'T LIKE TO WORK." THAT'S BULLSHIT! 197 00:10:17,200 --> 00:10:20,800 WE WORKED IN THIS COUNTRY FOR 400 YEARS FOR FREE. 198 00:10:20,800 --> 00:10:23,800 WE AIN'T LAZY, GOD DAMN IT. WE ON VACATION. 199 00:10:26,133 --> 00:10:28,133 WHAT ELSE THEY SAY ABOUT US? "DON'T LEAVE YOUR STUFF AROUND BLACK PEOPLE, 200 00:10:28,133 --> 00:10:30,233 'CAUSE THEY STEAL! WATCH YOUR STUFF AROUND THEM, 'CAUSE THEY STEAL!" 201 00:10:30,233 --> 00:10:31,873 SHIT, WHITE PEOPLE STEAL TOO. 202 00:10:31,867 --> 00:10:34,397 NIGGAS ARE JUST WORSE AT IT. 203 00:10:34,400 --> 00:10:37,870 CARS, CLOTHING, JEWELRY, MONEY. THAT'S IT, THAT'S ALL WE EVER STOLE. 204 00:10:37,867 --> 00:10:41,027 CARS, CLOTHING, JEWELRY, MONEY. Y'ALL STEAL THE GOOD SHIT! 205 00:10:41,033 --> 00:10:43,403 STOCKS AND ELECTIONS! 206 00:10:48,500 --> 00:10:51,270 CAN'T FUCK WITH Y'ALL WHEN IT COMES TO STEALING! 207 00:10:51,266 --> 00:10:53,026 Y'ALL MOTHERFUCKERS STOLE NORTH AMERICA 208 00:10:53,033 --> 00:10:56,003 AND DIDN'T EVEN MOVE THE SHIT! 209 00:10:56,000 --> 00:10:59,130 HOW FUCKIN' GANGSTA IS THAT? NIGGAS CAN'T STEAL NO COUNTRY! 210 00:11:00,400 --> 00:11:01,970 AND WE DON'T ALL ACT ALIKE, EITHER. 211 00:11:01,967 --> 00:11:03,567 JUST SO YOU WHITE PEOPLE KNOW, WE DON'T ALL ACT ALIKE. 212 00:11:03,567 --> 00:11:04,997 ONE OF MY WHITE FRIENDS SAID TO ME THE OTHER DAY-- 213 00:11:05,000 --> 00:11:07,170 "HEY, MAN, THAT GUY ACTS BLACK." 214 00:11:07,166 --> 00:11:09,466 LIKE HOW THE FUCK DO YOU ACT BLACK? 215 00:11:10,834 --> 00:11:12,804 THIS AIN'T NO FUCKIN' ACT. I'M BLACK, GOD DAMN IT! 216 00:11:12,800 --> 00:11:15,970 I DON'T ACT LIKE I'M SCARED OF THE COPS. I'M SCARED OF THE COPS! 217 00:11:17,233 --> 00:11:19,933 ALL RIGHT? I DON'T ACT LIKE I LIKE CHICKEN. 218 00:11:19,934 --> 00:11:22,034 THAT SHIT IS DELICIOUS! 219 00:11:25,433 --> 00:11:29,003 I WISH I HAD A FUCKIN' DRUMSTICK ON STAGE RIGHT NOW. 220 00:11:29,000 --> 00:11:31,300 THAT'S NOT A MYTH, WHITE PEOPLE, I'LL TELL YOU THAT RIGHT NOW. 221 00:11:31,300 --> 00:11:33,570 WE'LL FUCK SOME CHICKEN UP, OKAY? 222 00:11:33,567 --> 00:11:37,367 WHEN THE BIRD FLU GET HERE, I'M GONNA BE IMMUNE TO THAT SHIT. 223 00:11:37,367 --> 00:11:39,297 GONNA BE THE ONLY NIGGA LEFT ON THE PLANET. 224 00:11:39,300 --> 00:11:42,030 ME AND ALL THE CHICKENS. COME ON, LET'S GO! ( squawks ) 225 00:11:42,033 --> 00:11:44,873 HEY, I'M TONY ROCK, Y'ALL. THANKS FOR COMING OUT. GOOD NIGHT, PEACE. 226 00:11:44,867 --> 00:11:47,067 ( hip-hop backbeat playing ) 227 00:12:00,700 --> 00:12:02,270 COMING TO THE STAGE-- 228 00:12:02,266 --> 00:12:05,166 OPRAH WINFREY SAID THAT SHE'S A FORCE TO BE RECKONED WITH. 229 00:12:05,166 --> 00:12:07,796 AND THEN SHE HAD THE FEDS ON HER MOTHERFUCKIN' ASS. 230 00:12:07,800 --> 00:12:09,770 GIVE IT UP FOR THE QUEEN OF COMEDY, 231 00:12:09,767 --> 00:12:11,997 SOMMORE! 232 00:12:27,467 --> 00:12:31,167 WHAT IS THE MOTHERFUCKIN' DEAL? 233 00:12:32,066 --> 00:12:33,526 NO, I'M-- LET ME TELL YOU, 234 00:12:33,533 --> 00:12:35,673 I'M JUST SO FUCKIN' HAPPY TO BE HERE. 235 00:12:35,667 --> 00:12:37,627 I'M JUST HAPPY TO BE A PART 236 00:12:37,633 --> 00:12:40,133 OF SOME QUALITY SHIT! 237 00:12:40,133 --> 00:12:41,973 I BEEN DEALING WITH SOME BULLSHIT. 238 00:12:41,967 --> 00:12:45,127 I ALWAYS FALL INTO THE BULLSHIT SOME KINDA WAY. 239 00:12:45,133 --> 00:12:47,633 LIKE, I DON'T KNOW WHEN THE LAST TIME Y'ALL TOOK A FLIGHT, 240 00:12:47,633 --> 00:12:51,373 BUT HAVE YOU SEEN THE STEWARDESSES LATELY? 241 00:12:51,367 --> 00:12:55,867 THE DAYS OF THE CUTE AIRLINE STEWARDESS IS DONE. 242 00:12:55,867 --> 00:12:59,127 AND I ONLY FLY DELTA. WHEN I TELL YOU DELTA MUST GOT A PROGRAM, 243 00:12:59,133 --> 00:13:02,233 LIKE A WORK PROGRAM, WITH HOME DEPOT OR SOME SHIT. 244 00:13:02,233 --> 00:13:05,103 'CAUSE THIS IS THE BIGGEST BUNCH 245 00:13:05,100 --> 00:13:08,430 OF BURLIEST BITCHES YOU EVER WANNA SEE. 246 00:13:08,433 --> 00:13:09,933 AND WHAT THEY DOING, THEY TRYING TO MIX 247 00:13:09,934 --> 00:13:11,804 THE AIRLINE STEWARDESSES WITH THE AIR MARSHAL. 248 00:13:11,800 --> 00:13:13,400 YOU KNOW, SAVE MONEY AND SHIT. 249 00:13:13,400 --> 00:13:16,630 I DAMN NEAR HAD TO FIGHT ONE OF THESE BITCHES COMING OVER HERE! 250 00:13:16,633 --> 00:13:18,403 I'M SITTING ON THE PLANE, DRINKING MY LITTLE DRINK, 251 00:13:18,400 --> 00:13:19,900 THIS BITCH GONNA LEAN OVER ME, 252 00:13:19,900 --> 00:13:23,370 "CAN I GET YOU A BLANKET?" I SAID, "HELL NO, 253 00:13:23,367 --> 00:13:25,967 YOU CAN GET THE TIP OF YOUR DICK OUT MY DRINK!" 254 00:13:28,567 --> 00:13:30,497 "BITCH, I KNOW YOU THE AIR MARSHAL, 255 00:13:30,500 --> 00:13:32,530 GET YOUR BIG ASS DOWN FROM THERE." 256 00:13:35,100 --> 00:13:37,530 BUT I DON'T BLAME HER 'CAUSE FUCKIN' GAS IS HIGH. 257 00:13:37,533 --> 00:13:39,533 YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING? GAS IS HIGH. GAS SO HIGH, 258 00:13:39,533 --> 00:13:42,173 IT MAKE YOU WANNA FUCK A BUS DRIVER, DON'T IT? 259 00:13:43,700 --> 00:13:46,400 I'M TELLING YOU, GAS IS HIGH AS SHIT. 260 00:13:46,400 --> 00:13:49,300 I SWEAR, I TRY EVERY OPPORTUNITY 261 00:13:49,300 --> 00:13:51,630 WHERE I CAN JUST RELAX AND ENJOY MYSELF. 262 00:13:51,633 --> 00:13:53,303 I ENJOY MYSELF. 263 00:13:53,300 --> 00:13:55,300 LIKE WHEN I LEAVE HERE, I'M GOING ON VACATION. 264 00:13:55,300 --> 00:13:58,100 AND I'M GOING ON A REAL MOTHERFUCKIN' VACATION. 265 00:13:58,100 --> 00:14:00,570 'CAUSE I BELIEVE-- SISTERS, WE JUST DON'T GO ON VACATION 266 00:14:00,567 --> 00:14:02,027 LIKE WE SUPPOSED TO. 267 00:14:02,033 --> 00:14:03,773 LIKE I SEEN FIVE OF MY GIRLFRIENDS 268 00:14:03,767 --> 00:14:06,967 DO SOME OF THE SILLIEST SHIT I HAVE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE. 269 00:14:06,967 --> 00:14:09,127 FIVE OF MY GIRLFRIENDS WENT ON VACATION TOGETHER, 270 00:14:09,133 --> 00:14:12,003 SPENT BIG MONEY. WENT SOMEWHERE LIKE BERMUDA. 271 00:14:12,000 --> 00:14:15,130 STAYED IN THE BEST HOTEL THERE WAS IN BERMUDA. 272 00:14:15,133 --> 00:14:18,373 DID ALL THIS SHIT TOURISTS ARE SUPPOSED TO DO ON VACATION, 273 00:14:18,367 --> 00:14:20,667 BUT THEY DIDN'T GET NO DICK! 274 00:14:20,667 --> 00:14:23,497 THEY DIDN'T GET NO DICK. 275 00:14:24,867 --> 00:14:27,227 THEY CAME BACK FROM VACATION, I'M SITTING HERE, LIKE, 276 00:14:27,233 --> 00:14:30,503 "OOH, GIRL, TELL ME ALL ABOUT YOUR VACATION, TELL ME ALL ABOUT YOUR VACATION!" 277 00:14:30,500 --> 00:14:32,670 SHE WAS LIKE, "GIRL, IT WAS REALLY, REALLY NICE. 278 00:14:32,667 --> 00:14:34,127 WE STAYED IN A BEAUTIFUL HOTEL, 279 00:14:34,133 --> 00:14:36,073 THE WEATHER WAS NICE, WE WENT JET SKIING, 280 00:14:36,066 --> 00:14:39,096 WE ATE LOBSTER, WE WENT SHOPPING, WE DRANK MARGARITAS, 281 00:14:39,100 --> 00:14:41,900 IT WAS REALLY, REALLY NICE." 282 00:14:42,834 --> 00:14:44,834 ALL THAT SHIT, 283 00:14:44,834 --> 00:14:47,234 AND DIDN'T GET NO DICK. 284 00:14:48,233 --> 00:14:50,473 LET ME EXPLAIN THE DIFFERENCE 285 00:14:50,467 --> 00:14:53,997 BETWEEN WOMEN AND MEN. 286 00:14:54,000 --> 00:14:56,530 WHEN MEN GO ON VACATION, 287 00:14:56,533 --> 00:15:00,373 PUSSY IS THE FINAL DESTINATION. 288 00:15:01,266 --> 00:15:03,596 OH YEAH! OH YEAH! 289 00:15:03,600 --> 00:15:06,600 THAT'S RIGHT! THAT'S RIGHT! 290 00:15:08,000 --> 00:15:10,030 FIVE MEN COULD GO 291 00:15:10,033 --> 00:15:12,003 TO SELMA, ALABAMA. 292 00:15:12,000 --> 00:15:15,570 THEY COULD STAY IN A MOTEL 6. 293 00:15:15,567 --> 00:15:19,067 IT COULD RAIN EVERY FUCKIN' DAY. 294 00:15:19,066 --> 00:15:20,896 THEY COULD GET SOME PUSSY FROM A BITCH 295 00:15:20,900 --> 00:15:24,070 THAT WORKED AT THE LOCAL WAL-MART. 296 00:15:24,066 --> 00:15:27,526 THEY'D BE LIKE, "NIGGA, THIS SHIT WAS OFF THE CHAIN." 297 00:15:31,734 --> 00:15:35,304 YOU'D BE SITTING THERE LIKE, "ALABAMA WAS LIVE LIKE THAT?" 298 00:15:39,567 --> 00:15:42,127 TELLING YOU! WOMEN, WE GOTTA CATCH UP! 299 00:15:42,133 --> 00:15:45,673 I'M SAYIN', I DON'T HAVE A HUSBAND, I STILL DON'T HAVE KIDS, 300 00:15:45,667 --> 00:15:49,097 'CAUSE I ALWAYS SAID, I NEVER WANTED TO HAVE KIDS UNTIL I GOT MARRIED. 301 00:15:49,100 --> 00:15:51,230 NOW I THINK I WAITED TOO LONG TO GET MARRIED, 302 00:15:51,233 --> 00:15:53,003 'CAUSE I THINK MEN SHOULDN'T GET MARRIED 303 00:15:53,000 --> 00:15:56,100 TILL THEY OVER 30. AM I RIGHT? 'CAUSE MEN ARE NOT READY. 304 00:15:56,100 --> 00:15:58,500 THAT'S RIGHT! 305 00:15:58,500 --> 00:16:00,170 NO, THEY NOT. 306 00:16:00,166 --> 00:16:03,196 WHEREAS WOMEN, I THINK WE SHOULD GET MARRIED 307 00:16:03,200 --> 00:16:06,200 WHEN WE'RE YOUNGER. NOT THAT YOU'RE READY, 308 00:16:06,200 --> 00:16:09,570 BUT JUST SO YOUR BRIDESMAIDS COULD LOOK BETTER, YOU KNOW? 309 00:16:11,767 --> 00:16:14,227 SHIT! YOU FUCK AROUND, 310 00:16:14,233 --> 00:16:17,333 AND TRY TO HAVE A WEDDING LATE IN LIFE. 311 00:16:17,333 --> 00:16:22,173 YOU GO DOWN THE AISLE, FOLLOWED BY FOUR, FIVE BAKED POTATOES AND SHIT, 312 00:16:22,166 --> 00:16:25,766 TWO, THREE BELL PEPPERS BE BRINGING UP THE REAR. 313 00:16:25,767 --> 00:16:27,297 THEY GOT ON SATIN DRESSES 314 00:16:27,300 --> 00:16:29,400 WITH THE BOWS WAY THE FUCK UP HERE. 315 00:16:29,400 --> 00:16:31,270 YOU GET THE PICTURES BACK, YOU BE LIKE, 316 00:16:31,266 --> 00:16:33,266 "GOD DAMN, Y'ALL BITCHES FUCKED UP MY PICTURES. 317 00:16:33,266 --> 00:16:35,066 LOOK AT THIS SHIT RIGHT HERE! 318 00:16:35,066 --> 00:16:37,166 JENNIFER, U COULD HAVE HELD YOUR STOMACH IN TIGHT ON THAT SHOT." 319 00:16:37,166 --> 00:16:39,526 YOU FUCKED THIS WHOLE ANGLE UP RIGHT HERE." 320 00:16:42,700 --> 00:16:45,170 THAT'S WHY WHEN I GET MARRIED, I'M DOING LIKE THE RAPPERS. 321 00:16:45,166 --> 00:16:47,926 I'M HAVING VIDEO BITCHES IN MY WEDDING. 322 00:16:47,934 --> 00:16:50,504 OH YEAH, OH YEAH. I'M HAVING VIDEO BITCHES. 323 00:16:50,500 --> 00:16:52,800 I'M GONNA HAVE LIKE A WHOLE LINE OF THEM BITCHES. 324 00:16:52,800 --> 00:16:55,100 I DON'T KNOW NONE OF THESE HOS. 325 00:16:56,133 --> 00:16:57,673 FLAWLESS! 326 00:16:57,667 --> 00:16:59,867 NOW, YOU GOTTA GIVE IT UP, YOU GOTTA GIVE IT UP 327 00:16:59,867 --> 00:17:01,897 TO THE VIDEO BITCHES, NOW! 328 00:17:01,900 --> 00:17:05,170 HAVE YOU SEEN THE VIDEO BITCHES? 329 00:17:05,166 --> 00:17:07,496 SEE, WOMEN, DON'T HATE ON THE VIDEO BITCHES. 330 00:17:07,500 --> 00:17:09,500 SEE, 'CAUSE WHAT HAPPENS, SEE WOMEN, 331 00:17:09,500 --> 00:17:12,730 WHEN WE REACH A CERTAIN AGE WE GET INTIMIDATED BY YOUNGER WOMEN. 332 00:17:12,734 --> 00:17:16,004 WE GET INTIMIDATED. NOT JEALOUS, BUT INTIMIDATED. 333 00:17:16,000 --> 00:17:18,070 SEE, YOU LOOK AT 'EM IN A CERTAIN KINDA WAY, 334 00:17:18,066 --> 00:17:20,596 BUT SEE, IN YOUR MIND, YOU REMEMBER WHEN YOU WAS THEIR AGE, 335 00:17:20,600 --> 00:17:22,800 YOU USED TO DO THE SAME TYPE OF SHIT. 336 00:17:22,800 --> 00:17:25,000 SO IN YOUR MIND, YOU'LL BE WANTING TO HATE ON 'EM 337 00:17:25,000 --> 00:17:28,030 BUT IN YOUR HEART, YOU'LL BE LIKE, "GO, YOUNG BITCH, GO! 338 00:17:29,700 --> 00:17:33,030 OH YEAH! OH YEAH! 339 00:17:33,033 --> 00:17:35,333 YOU GET INTIMIDATED BY THE VIDEO BITCHES. 340 00:17:35,333 --> 00:17:38,303 THAT'S WHAT HAPPENED WITH JANET JACKSON THAT YEAR AT THE SUPER BOWL. 341 00:17:38,300 --> 00:17:40,300 JANET JACKSON WAS SO INTIMIDATED 342 00:17:40,300 --> 00:17:43,100 BY BEYONCE SINGING "THE STAR SPANGLED BANNER," 343 00:17:43,100 --> 00:17:46,430 THAT SHE PULLED HER MOTHERFUCKIN' TITTY OUT. 344 00:17:46,433 --> 00:17:48,273 SHE DID! SHE DID! 345 00:17:48,266 --> 00:17:52,026 SHE SAID, "OKAY, BITCH, YOU UP THERE SINGING 'OH, SAY CAN YOU SEE,' 346 00:17:52,033 --> 00:17:55,303 BUT I'M GONNA SEE WHAT THEY SAY WHEN THEY SEE THIS TITTY!" 347 00:17:58,667 --> 00:18:01,567 SHE SHUT THAT MOTHERFUCKER DOWN. 348 00:18:03,133 --> 00:18:06,733 Y'ALL DON'T EVEN REMEMBER WHAT THE FUCK BEYONCE HAD ON, DO YOU? 349 00:18:08,000 --> 00:18:09,930 OH, THAT WAS A YOUNG GIRL MOVE, RIGHT THERE, 350 00:18:09,934 --> 00:18:13,104 THAT WAS A YOUNG GIRL MOVE. 351 00:18:13,100 --> 00:18:15,670 TELLING YOU! AND YOU GOTTA BE HONEST WITH YOURSELF, 352 00:18:15,667 --> 00:18:19,397 WOMEN, OUR MEN LOVE THEM VIDEO BITCHES. 353 00:18:19,400 --> 00:18:21,370 OH, THEY LOVE 'EM! AND BE HONEST WITH YOURSELF, 354 00:18:21,367 --> 00:18:24,027 THEY PUT PRESSURE ON REGULAR WOMEN. THEY DO. 355 00:18:24,033 --> 00:18:26,673 THAT'S WHY I THINK FOR 2007, 356 00:18:26,667 --> 00:18:28,497 WE SHOULD MAKE THE RAPPERS 357 00:18:28,500 --> 00:18:31,100 USE THEY REAL BITCHES IN THE VIDEO. 358 00:18:35,233 --> 00:18:38,973 OH YEAH, BRING YOUR REAL BITCH TO THE VIDEO. 359 00:18:38,967 --> 00:18:41,827 DON'T BRING CHAMPAGNE, DON'T USE DESTINY, 360 00:18:41,834 --> 00:18:43,234 DON'T USE DIAMOND-- 361 00:18:43,233 --> 00:18:46,633 BRING IRMA DOWN THIS MOTHERFUCKER. 362 00:18:48,767 --> 00:18:52,297 BRING YOUR FIRST BABY MAMA OUT THIS BITCH. 363 00:18:52,300 --> 00:18:54,430 LET'S PUT MILDRED IN THE TWO-PIECE. 364 00:18:54,433 --> 00:18:57,303 LET'S SEE THE WAY SHE BE "HUSTLIN', HUSTLIN', HUSTLIN'." 365 00:18:57,300 --> 00:18:59,970 Y'ALL, MY NAME IS SOMMORE. Y'ALL BEEN GREAT. THANK Y'ALL. 366 00:19:08,133 --> 00:19:10,273 SOMMORE, Y'ALL! 367 00:19:11,834 --> 00:19:13,404 COMING TO THE STAGE, 368 00:19:13,400 --> 00:19:15,600 STRAIGHT OUT OF THE BOOGIE-DOWN BRONX, 369 00:19:15,600 --> 00:19:17,870 SHOW SOME LOVE FOR CAPONE! 370 00:19:24,367 --> 00:19:26,327 YES, SIR! 371 00:19:26,333 --> 00:19:29,203 WHAT'S UP, GOD DAMN IT! 372 00:19:29,200 --> 00:19:31,330 THIS IS THE END OF THE WORLD. 373 00:19:31,333 --> 00:19:33,773 IF YOU SEE SOMEBODY YOU LIKE TONIGHT, FUCK 'EM. 374 00:19:35,433 --> 00:19:38,003 THAT'S THE TRUTH. AIN'T NO BULLSHITTIN' AROUND. 375 00:19:38,000 --> 00:19:40,800 THIS IS NICE-- GOD, LOOK AT ALL THESE LADIES. 376 00:19:40,800 --> 00:19:42,770 OOH, SHIT! 377 00:19:42,767 --> 00:19:45,797 YOU LOOKIN' AT ME, GIRL. DON'T DO IT. I'M A FREAK. 378 00:19:47,166 --> 00:19:49,966 I AM A FREAK. I EAT PUSSY TILL I BURP. 379 00:19:51,266 --> 00:19:53,496 ( laughs ) YES SIR! 380 00:19:53,500 --> 00:19:56,800 IF YOU AIN'T FREAKY, DON'T LOOK AT ME, GOD DAMN IT. 381 00:19:56,800 --> 00:20:00,530 I'M THE TYPE OF NIGGA THAT'D PICK YOU UP, THROW YOU OUT THE WINDOW, 382 00:20:00,533 --> 00:20:04,373 RUN DOWNSTAIRS, CATCH YOU, AND FUCK YOU BACK UPSTAIRS. 383 00:20:08,033 --> 00:20:10,003 YES SIR! 384 00:20:10,000 --> 00:20:12,000 THAT'S IT, LADIES. 385 00:20:12,000 --> 00:20:14,000 THIS IS A NEW YEAR. THE WORLD'S ABOUT TO END, 386 00:20:14,000 --> 00:20:16,300 YOU MIGHT AS WELL GET FREAKY, DON'T LOOK FOR NO GOOD MEN. 387 00:20:16,300 --> 00:20:19,400 AIN'T NONE OF US LEFT. NONE OF US! 388 00:20:19,400 --> 00:20:22,470 THE PRICE OF GAS DONE CHANGED ALL OF THAT SHIT! 389 00:20:22,467 --> 00:20:25,397 "COME PICK ME UP." "BITCH, YOU BETTER MEET ME! 390 00:20:27,233 --> 00:20:29,033 I GET TO YOUR BLOCK, I'M OUTTA GAS. 391 00:20:29,033 --> 00:20:32,033 WE BOTH STUCK. FUCK YOU!" 392 00:20:32,033 --> 00:20:34,633 IT'S THE TRUTH, 'CAUSE LADIES, Y'ALL DON'T BELIEVE IN LOVE NO MORE. 393 00:20:34,633 --> 00:20:36,773 NO, SIR. Y'ALL WANT A MAN TO COME OVER, 394 00:20:36,767 --> 00:20:38,697 FUCK YOUR BRAINS OUT, THEN LEAVE. 395 00:20:38,700 --> 00:20:42,630 YEAH, LOOK AT 'EM CLAPPING, LITTLE SNEAKY BITCHES. 396 00:20:42,633 --> 00:20:45,803 I'M GONNA TELL YOU A SECRET-- YOU FUCK ME, I'M SPENDING THE NIGHT! 397 00:20:47,166 --> 00:20:49,566 YOU MIGHT AS WELL GET ME SOME JUICE AND SOME CEREAL, 398 00:20:49,567 --> 00:20:51,567 'CAUSE I'M STAYING WITH YOUR ASS. 399 00:20:51,567 --> 00:20:54,267 AND Y'ALL BROTHERS THAT BE LEAVING, Y'ALL STUPID! 400 00:20:54,266 --> 00:20:55,966 AFTER A NUT, YOU CAN'T EVEN WALK. 401 00:20:55,967 --> 00:20:58,427 YOU GONNA TRY TO FUCKIN' DRIVE? 402 00:20:58,433 --> 00:21:01,003 AND SISTERS ARE GOOD WITH THROWING HINTS-- 403 00:21:01,000 --> 00:21:02,900 "WHOA! IT SURE IS GETTING LATE! 404 00:21:02,900 --> 00:21:04,830 I'D BE LIKE, "YEAH, YOU BETTER GO TO SLEEP! 405 00:21:04,834 --> 00:21:08,034 WE GOTTA GET THE FUCK UP AT THE SAME TIME, BITCH!" 406 00:21:08,033 --> 00:21:10,233 AIN'T GOING NO FUCKIN' WHERE! 407 00:21:10,233 --> 00:21:11,873 SHIT. 408 00:21:11,867 --> 00:21:13,927 THIS WORLD COMING TO A END. 409 00:21:13,934 --> 00:21:15,474 TELL Y'ALL RIGHT NOW, IT'S COMING TO A END. 410 00:21:15,467 --> 00:21:17,897 A LOT OF LADIES, SITTIN' HERE RIGHT NOW GOT A BOYFRIEND 411 00:21:17,900 --> 00:21:20,470 AND ANOTHER NIGGA ON THE SIDE. 412 00:21:20,467 --> 00:21:23,697 YEAH, GO AHEAD, CLAP. I'M NOT NO SIDE NIGGA. 413 00:21:23,700 --> 00:21:26,870 IF YOU GOT A BOYFRIEND, AND YOU FUCK ME, 414 00:21:26,867 --> 00:21:29,327 YOU GOT TWO FUCKIN' BOYFRIENDS! 415 00:21:31,767 --> 00:21:33,327 THAT'S RIGHT, GOD DAMN! 416 00:21:33,333 --> 00:21:36,603 EITHER YOU INTRODUCE ME, OR I'M GONNA INTRODUCE MY FUCKIN' SELF! 417 00:21:36,600 --> 00:21:40,730 "WHAT'S UP THERE! ME TOO, NIGGA! ME TOO!" 418 00:21:43,333 --> 00:21:45,603 YES, SIR! 419 00:21:47,100 --> 00:21:50,330 I'M TELLING YOU, MAN! GOTTA HAVE FUN WITH LIFE. 420 00:21:50,333 --> 00:21:52,073 GOTTA HAVE FUN. 421 00:21:52,066 --> 00:21:54,926 I LIKE L.A., 'CAUSE I SEE A LOT OF INTERRACIAL SHIT. 422 00:21:54,934 --> 00:21:58,704 BROTHERS FUCKING ALL DIFFERENT KIND OF NATIONALITIES. 423 00:21:58,700 --> 00:22:01,670 THAT'S GOOD, 'CAUSE BLACK WOMEN, Y'ALL STRONG. 424 00:22:01,667 --> 00:22:04,697 TOO FUCKIN' STRONG, SOMETIMES. 425 00:22:04,700 --> 00:22:07,500 DICK BE HITTING YOUR HEART, YOU COULD SEE IT HITTING YOUR HEART, 426 00:22:07,500 --> 00:22:10,170 YOU STILL TALKING ABOUT-- ( growls ) 427 00:22:10,166 --> 00:22:12,126 LITTLE LATIN WOMEN, THEY CAN'T TAKE IT. 428 00:22:12,133 --> 00:22:14,573 THEY JUMP RIGHT THE FUCK-- "AY, DIOS MIO, PAPA! 429 00:22:14,567 --> 00:22:16,797 THE PUSSY, IT STAY ON THE BED. 430 00:22:18,166 --> 00:22:20,926 LOOK AT THE PUSSY ON THE BED!" 431 00:22:20,934 --> 00:22:23,904 LOT OF BROTHERS DATING CHINESE WOMEN NOW. 432 00:22:23,900 --> 00:22:26,030 ORIENTAL GIRLS. 433 00:22:26,033 --> 00:22:28,303 IT AIN'T 'CAUSE THEY GOT SEXY BODIES, 434 00:22:28,300 --> 00:22:31,130 IT'S 'CAUSE OF THE NOISE THEY MAKE. 435 00:22:31,133 --> 00:22:33,703 EVERY MAN IN HERE WOULD LOVE TO HEAR 436 00:22:33,700 --> 00:22:35,530 THAT KINDA NOISE FROM ANY WOMAN. 437 00:22:35,533 --> 00:22:38,873 ( mimics Chinese accent ) "OH, OH NO, OH NIGGA, YOU KILLING THERE!" 438 00:22:38,867 --> 00:22:42,027 ( screams ) "OH! OH NIGGA! 439 00:22:42,033 --> 00:22:44,333 OH, OH GOD! 440 00:22:44,333 --> 00:22:48,133 YOU-- OH, BIGGA BLACKA DICKA MAN! 441 00:22:49,500 --> 00:22:51,830 YOU KILLING-- OH, KILLING PUSSY! 442 00:22:51,834 --> 00:22:54,804 I DEAD, I DEAD RIGHT NOW!" 443 00:22:56,633 --> 00:22:59,603 HOW THE HELL YOU AIN'T GONNA MAKE LOVE TO THAT? 444 00:22:59,600 --> 00:23:01,530 SOMEBODY SCREAMING THAT TYPE OF SHIT? 445 00:23:01,533 --> 00:23:05,103 YOU JUST HITTING IT REGULAR-- "OH, OH, YOU KILLING ME! 446 00:23:05,100 --> 00:23:06,530 OH, MY HEART! 447 00:23:06,533 --> 00:23:09,603 OH, YOU BLACKA DICKA MAN! 448 00:23:09,600 --> 00:23:11,900 YOU BLACKA DICKA!" 449 00:23:14,734 --> 00:23:16,674 SHIT. 450 00:23:16,667 --> 00:23:19,097 GOTTA HAVE FUN, MAN. 451 00:23:19,100 --> 00:23:22,500 HAVE FUN. HAVE SEX TONIGHT. FUCK. 452 00:23:22,500 --> 00:23:25,430 YOU HEAR ME, BOO? I SEE YOU LOOKIN'. FUCK. 453 00:23:26,767 --> 00:23:30,327 AND NO REGULAR SEX EITHER, LADIES, FUCK REGULAR SEX! 454 00:23:30,333 --> 00:23:32,703 EVERYBODY IN HERE HAD REGULAR SEX. 455 00:23:32,700 --> 00:23:34,400 DO DIFFERENT SHIT! 456 00:23:34,400 --> 00:23:36,670 YOU LAYING DOWN, THIS MAN ON TOP OF YOU, 457 00:23:36,667 --> 00:23:39,667 YOU TALKING ABOUT "AH, AH, AH--" BE IN CONTROL! 458 00:23:39,667 --> 00:23:42,527 TURN THAT MOTHERFUCKER OVER! 459 00:23:46,133 --> 00:23:48,633 PUNCH THAT NIGGA IN HIS CHEST, BOOM! 460 00:23:49,967 --> 00:23:51,727 HE GONNA FLINCH UP AND LOOK AT YOU, 461 00:23:51,734 --> 00:23:53,504 "WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?!" 462 00:23:53,500 --> 00:23:56,370 SAY "SHUT UP, BITCH, AND TAKE THIS PUSSY 463 00:23:56,367 --> 00:23:58,927 LIKE A MAN!" 464 00:24:03,233 --> 00:24:05,373 SHIT! 465 00:24:08,266 --> 00:24:10,426 DO DIFFERENT SHIT! 466 00:24:10,433 --> 00:24:13,903 THAT'S HOW YOU KEEP A RELATIONSHIP-- DIFFERENT SHIT! 467 00:24:13,900 --> 00:24:17,300 EVERY NOW AND THEN, ROB YOUR FUCKIN' MAN! 468 00:24:17,300 --> 00:24:19,330 TAKE THE DICK FROM HIM. 469 00:24:19,333 --> 00:24:22,133 EVERY MAN IN HERE ALWAYS WANNA CHEAT WITH DIFFERENT WOMEN. 470 00:24:22,133 --> 00:24:25,433 YOU BECOME THAT DIFFERENT MOTHERFUCKER! 471 00:24:26,700 --> 00:24:28,500 THAT'S WHAT YOU DO! 472 00:24:28,500 --> 00:24:31,570 EVERY NOW AND THEN, YOU PUT ON A NINJA SUIT. 473 00:24:35,033 --> 00:24:38,603 WHEN THAT NIGGA COME THROUGH THE DOOR, YOU PUT A KNIFE TO HIS NECK, 474 00:24:38,600 --> 00:24:41,200 "PULL YOUR DICK OUT, NIGGA!" 475 00:24:51,400 --> 00:24:54,730 HE GONNA BE NERVOUS AT FIRST-- "WHO THE FUCK IS THIS?" 476 00:24:54,734 --> 00:24:58,074 SAY "SHUT UP! AND PULL YOUR DICK OUT!" 477 00:24:58,066 --> 00:25:02,066 I BET THAT NIGGA BE HOME EVERY NIGHT LOOKING FOR A NEW COSTUME! 478 00:25:02,066 --> 00:25:04,466 "YOO-HOO! 479 00:25:04,467 --> 00:25:06,897 YOO-OO-HOO-OO!" 480 00:25:06,900 --> 00:25:09,930 MY NAME IS CAPONE, BLESS! 481 00:25:20,300 --> 00:25:23,730 ONE MORE TIME FOR CAPONE, Y'ALL. COME ON, COME ON! 482 00:25:23,734 --> 00:25:26,074 RUSSELL SIMMONS, Y'ALL! RUSS SIMMONS! 483 00:25:31,667 --> 00:25:34,527 THANK YOU FOR COMING OUT, GOD BLESS YOU. GOOD NIGHT! 484 00:25:37,500 --> 00:25:39,970 ( theme music playing ) 485 00:25:40,020 --> 00:25:44,570 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 38659

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