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??
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Glenn: It's Dean's
birthday tomorrow,
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and I've taken it upon myself,
as partner,
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00:00:15,016 --> 00:00:16,648
to plan a special surprise
for him.
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00:00:16,650 --> 00:00:18,717
[ Trills ]
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00:00:18,719 --> 00:00:21,487
Okay, you guys, as you know,
we have Dean's party coming up,
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and it is a "Predator" party
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because "Predator" was based on
the events of Dean's life.
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Chelsea: In olden times,
the 1980s,
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00:00:27,395 --> 00:00:29,561
Dean was supposedly
in the special forces,
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00:00:29,563 --> 00:00:31,663
and I guess they had a mission
in South America
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00:00:31,665 --> 00:00:33,399
that a movie was based on.
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00:00:33,401 --> 00:00:35,634
Glenn: My mom told me my father
was on that mission.
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00:00:35,636 --> 00:00:38,370
The actor that portrayed him in
that movie was Carl Weathers.
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00:00:38,372 --> 00:00:41,507
Victoria: I love Dean more than
money and Vicodin combined,
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00:00:41,509 --> 00:00:43,475
but there's no way
that happened.
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00:00:43,477 --> 00:00:45,444
You're trying to tell me
that this guy
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00:00:45,446 --> 00:00:47,279
that owns
a real-estate company now
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00:00:47,281 --> 00:00:48,647
was once part of a rescue team
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and went to a jungle
and fought an alien?
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Glenn: Yes!
Victoria: I mean, come on!
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00:00:52,720 --> 00:00:54,686
Glenn: Yes, okay?
Baxter: Wouldn't that have made huge headlines?
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Glenn: It made a movie.
Isn't that enough for you?
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00:00:56,590 --> 00:00:58,323
A best-selling movie.
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00:00:58,325 --> 00:01:00,092
Andrew: It would have been on,
like, a "60 Minutes."
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00:01:00,094 --> 00:01:01,593
Glenn: "60 Minutes"
couldn't cover it.
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00:01:01,595 --> 00:01:03,095
Baxter: I've seen the movie,
and at the beginning,
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it never says,
"Based on true events."
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Chelsea:
It does not say that.
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Victoria: Do you have any proof
of this?
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Glenn: Yeah, I have proof.
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My father died in the jungle
helping Dean escape! Victoria: Okay.
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00:01:10,438 --> 00:01:12,805
Glenn: My daddy was a hero,
and you shut up!
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Amir: I mean, Dean is Glenn's
father, so, come on.
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Chelsea:
Hypothetically, what --
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what happens at
a "Predator" party?
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Glenn: Okay, there are
"Predator"-themed games.
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There are
"Predator"-themed snacks.
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Maybe Predator will make
an appearance. I don't know.
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00:01:27,421 --> 00:01:29,588
It's just a way to honor
the fact that Dean comes --
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Andrew: So he will.
Glenn: "So he will"...?
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Andrew:
Make an appearance.
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00:01:33,094 --> 00:01:34,493
Glenn: Yes,
Dean will be there.
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Baxter: No, Predator.
Andrew: No, the Predator.
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You're trying to make it seem
like maybe he won't.
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Is he going to?
Glenn: I don't know.
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Chelsea:
He's obviously going to.
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Amir: You're smiling
whenever you say that.
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Andrew: He's going to.
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Baxter: Who is gonna be dressed
like Predator who's coming?
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Glenn: I don't know. Maybe the
actual Predator will show up.
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Baxter: My buddy Trey
has long braids.
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He can dress up like Predator.
Chelsea: Let's be careful.
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Victoria: Is he a predator?
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Chelsea: Let's just make sure
we're not just getting anyone
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with braids and calling them
a predator.
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It's just gonna get awkward.
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Amir: Guys, I think Trey needs
a job. Trey's life matters.
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Victoria: Are we gonna give Trey
a background check? Glenn: This Trey idea's out.
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Andrew: Can't we just do cowboys
or something?
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??
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Chelsea: Dean looks
fantastic on the cake. I'm gonna be honest.
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Amir: It looks a lot better than
I thought it was gonna look.
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Victoria: I mean, I'm against
this idea, but he looks amazing.
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Chelsea: It all kind of came
together. I don't mind it.
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Dean: Surprise.
Amir: Surprise.
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Baxter: Surprise!
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Victoria:
We were gonna say it.
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Dean: What is this?
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Andrew: Cake.
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Dean: Why?
Chelsea: For you.
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Dean: Have you all forgotten
my zero-tolerance policy
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towards cake?
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Cake is a dessert
for the very young
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and the elderly awaiting death.
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It is not sophisticated.
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It is not Platinum.
It has no place in this office.
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I want this poor excuse
for a dessert
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ground down into
the garbage disposal.
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Predator: [ Growling ]
Dean: Get a...
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No!
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It can't be you!
We killed you!
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We killed you in the jungle!
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Predator: [ Growls ]
Dean: No!
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Be gone!
Be gone!
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Glenn: Dean, Dean, Dean,
it's not the -- It's me, Glenn.
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It's not the Predator.
Okay, this is the Predator.
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Dean: Argh!
Chelsea: Take it off! Now!
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Glenn: No, I'm Glenn.
Guys, help me.
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Dean: I've got to get
to the chopper!
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Glenn: I'm not trying -- Dean,
I'm just trying to help you.
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Dean: No!
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Victoria: Putting it back on!
Take it off!
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Amir: Take the mask off.
Glenn: Help me.
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Amir: Take the mask off.
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Dean: Get -- Get -- Get
to the chopper, Glenn.
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Get to the chopper.
Glenn: Dean, relax.
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Baxter: Show him the mask.
It's just a mask.
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It's just a mask.
Chelsea: Dean, it's just a mask.
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Baxter: This is the Predator.
Dean: [ Moans ] No!
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Glenn: Take it away!
Victoria: Bad idea!
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Together:
? Happy birthday to you ?
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? Happy birthday to you ?
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Glenn:
Do you believe me now?!
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Do you believe me now?!
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Together:
? Happy birthday dear Dean ?
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??
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Victoria:
I've got great news
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for my client
who's selling her house.
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Her name is Athena,
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and she's an MMA
fighting champion.
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Attagirl.
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Athena: Hey.
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Victoria:
I got an offer for you.
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Athena: Bring it in.
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Victoria: You want to just
talk outside?
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Athena: Come on.
Man: Come on. Jump in.
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Athena:
Let's get some gloves on.
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Victoria: Oh, yeah, no.
Okay, yeah, no, definitely.
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Athena: We don't stop.
Victoria: Okay.
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I'm not really warmed up,
but I'm...
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Athena:
Throw some gloves on.
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Victoria: Great, yeah.
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Some, uh -- Some gloves.
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Ready for this?
Athena: I'm so ready.
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Victoria: 8.2.
All cash.
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Athena:
We said 8.4.
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Come on.
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Victoria:
It's all cash, all right?
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And just -- just
a few contingencies.
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Athena: I'm sorry?
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Victoria:
Well, for one, he --
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he wants some money
for basement repairs.
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Athena: Really? Really?
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What else?
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Victoria:
You know, we should do kicks.
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You need to work on your kicks.
You seem stiff.
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Athena: Wow!
Victoria: I'm being honest.
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Athena: I'm the stiff one.
Okay.
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Victoria:
A couple more things.
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[ Sighing ]
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Athena: Yeah, what was it?
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00:05:01,735 --> 00:05:04,369
Victoria: He really loves
your washer and dryer.
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00:05:04,371 --> 00:05:07,472
Athena: Washer and dryer
are staying with me, okay?
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Victoria: That's fine.
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00:05:08,909 --> 00:05:10,442
I think we should take
a water break.
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Athena: I feel like I don't know
if you got this.
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Victoria: It's just the washer
and dryer.
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Athena: Contingencies, 8.2,
my favorite washer and dryer.
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00:05:16,583 --> 00:05:18,750
Victoria: No one's gonna get you
more money than that.
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Athena: Who is this guy,
by the way?
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Victoria: I don't know,
he's some doctor.
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He's a podiatrist or something.
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Athena: All right.
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Why doesn't he come in here
and chat with me man-to-man?
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Victoria: Okay.
I'm not gonna bring him in here.
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That's why you have a broker.
I'll talk to him.
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Athena: Yeah,
I do have a broker,
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and she's not doing her job.
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So, bring him in here.
We'll chat it out proper.
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Call him, Vic.
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Victoria:
Keep working on your kicks.
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Athena: Thanks.
Thanks for taking care of that.
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00:05:44,044 --> 00:05:45,744
Victoria:
It doesn't even hurt.
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??
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Baxter: Graham,
thanks for coming in.
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Andrew: Absolutely.
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Graham: I just want to say,
before we start,
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00:05:59,460 --> 00:06:00,959
I'm really a big fan
of both you guys.
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00:06:00,961 --> 00:06:02,828
I-I love the show.
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00:06:02,830 --> 00:06:04,129
I think you guys do a great job
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00:06:04,131 --> 00:06:06,031
finding people beautiful places
to live.
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But I also...
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think you guys
are pretty cool.
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Andrew: Doing this show is
great advertisement for us.
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Baxter:
A lot of our new clients
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are actually fans of
"Bajillion Dollar Properties."
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Graham: You're, like,
my favorite couple on TV.
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00:06:19,847 --> 00:06:22,581
Baxter: Ha. Thank you.
Thanks.
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00:06:22,583 --> 00:06:23,882
We're not together in our...
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Graham: Really?
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Baxter: Really, yeah, yeah,
yeah, yeah.
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00:06:26,920 --> 00:06:28,787
Andrew: Yeah.
Graham: Oh, that's so funny.
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00:06:28,789 --> 00:06:30,956
Like, the chemistry with you
guys is, like, really palpable.
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00:06:30,958 --> 00:06:32,791
Baxter: Well, yeah.
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00:06:32,793 --> 00:06:34,593
Yeah, we've been friends for
a while, but we're actually --
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Graham: You're not a couple?
Baxter: We're not together.
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00:06:35,996 --> 00:06:37,529
Graham: But you're both gay.
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Baxter:
I'm gay, and he's not.
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00:06:38,899 --> 00:06:41,600
Graham: Okay.
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00:06:41,602 --> 00:06:44,936
Well, I just want to say it's --
I'm just, like, genuinely --
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00:06:44,938 --> 00:06:47,506
I don't want to geek out
or get weird with you guys.
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00:06:47,508 --> 00:06:49,107
Baxter: No, no, no, no.
It's just us.
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00:06:49,109 --> 00:06:50,876
There's no cameras here.
There's nothing.
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00:06:50,878 --> 00:06:53,712
Don't -- Yeah, no, that's --
Don't worry about it.
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00:06:53,714 --> 00:06:55,147
Graham: Yeah.
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00:06:55,149 --> 00:06:57,015
It's just three dudes
looking for a place.
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00:06:57,017 --> 00:06:59,484
Baxter: Yeah, that's all it is.
The cameras aren't here.
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00:06:59,486 --> 00:07:02,020
Don't feel like you have to look
at them or reference them.
200
00:07:02,022 --> 00:07:05,590
You know, they're -- they're
just part of the decor,
201
00:07:05,592 --> 00:07:06,958
you know what I mean?
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00:07:06,960 --> 00:07:09,461
Are you looking
at the microphone?
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00:07:09,463 --> 00:07:11,062
Don't worry about the mike.
Graham: Okay.
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00:07:11,064 --> 00:07:12,964
I'm sorry.
I'm really sorry.
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00:07:12,966 --> 00:07:14,733
Baxter: That's all right.
Andrew: No, don't be sorry.
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00:07:14,735 --> 00:07:16,701
Baxter: Don't feel like you have
to play anything up
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00:07:16,703 --> 00:07:18,036
or, you know,
reference the camera.
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00:07:18,038 --> 00:07:20,172
Graham:
I'm looking for a place...
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00:07:20,174 --> 00:07:21,840
a new place to move into.
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00:07:21,842 --> 00:07:23,608
Baxter: Okay.
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00:07:23,610 --> 00:07:26,144
Graham: And I'm excited about
seeing what is out there.
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00:07:26,146 --> 00:07:28,013
Andrew: That's a good start.
Baxter: Great.
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00:07:28,015 --> 00:07:30,615
Andrew: Our job right here is
not to worry about this stuff.
214
00:07:30,617 --> 00:07:32,484
It's to worry about you
and make sure
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00:07:32,486 --> 00:07:36,188
that you get the place
that you need and want.
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00:07:36,190 --> 00:07:39,057
Baxter: Now, all of these are on
the west side, which you wanted.
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00:07:39,059 --> 00:07:42,594
Some of them are really west,
you know, on the beach here,
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00:07:42,596 --> 00:07:45,697
and also we have, like --
have a couple in the hills.
219
00:07:45,699 --> 00:07:49,935
So, if you see something
you're responding to --
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00:07:49,937 --> 00:07:51,503
Graham: Mm-hmm.
221
00:07:51,505 --> 00:07:53,038
Baxter: Are you looking?
Just look here.
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00:07:53,040 --> 00:07:54,773
Andrew:
Right down here, Graham.
223
00:07:54,775 --> 00:07:56,241
Baxter: And if you see
a front door that you like...
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00:07:56,243 --> 00:07:57,609
Graham: Yeah.
Baxter: ...or a yard.
225
00:07:57,611 --> 00:07:59,044
Graham:
This is an actual grass?
226
00:07:59,046 --> 00:08:00,979
Andrew: Retractable turf.
227
00:08:00,981 --> 00:08:03,248
Baxter: Yeah, the drought right
now, so we have -- we have turf.
228
00:08:03,250 --> 00:08:05,016
You can do anything you want
with this yard.
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00:08:05,018 --> 00:08:06,685
It's up to you.
230
00:08:06,687 --> 00:08:08,520
Graham: Great.
231
00:08:08,522 --> 00:08:10,722
Baxter: I feel like ever since
we talked about the cameras,
232
00:08:10,724 --> 00:08:12,190
you've been staring directly
at them.
233
00:08:12,192 --> 00:08:13,859
If you want, just --
They're not here.
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00:08:13,861 --> 00:08:15,193
Andrew: Look at this.
235
00:08:15,195 --> 00:08:17,128
Graham: Yeah, this --
Oh, this is great.
236
00:08:17,130 --> 00:08:18,997
This -- This place looks
beautiful.
237
00:08:18,999 --> 00:08:21,766
Um, it's a little outside
of my price range.
238
00:08:21,768 --> 00:08:24,269
I thought Chelsea
had talked to you.
239
00:08:24,271 --> 00:08:30,008
My budget's around $800,000
to about $900,000.
240
00:08:30,010 --> 00:08:36,081
Baxter: Wait, you -- Chelsea
is who referred you to us?
241
00:08:36,083 --> 00:08:37,749
Graham: Mm-hmm.
242
00:08:37,751 --> 00:08:41,520
Andrew:
Did you say 800,000...
243
00:08:41,522 --> 00:08:44,289
$20 bills?
244
00:08:44,291 --> 00:08:47,225
Graham: N-No, $800,000,
245
00:08:47,227 --> 00:08:49,594
and I was hoping to get
a mortgage,
246
00:08:49,596 --> 00:08:52,597
like a 20-to-1 arm.
247
00:08:52,599 --> 00:08:55,233
Baxter: So you don't even have
this in all cash?
248
00:08:55,235 --> 00:08:57,068
Graham: Go halfsies on it?
249
00:08:57,070 --> 00:08:58,737
Baxter: Go halfsies?
250
00:08:58,739 --> 00:09:00,105
Andrew:
We probably wouldn't --
251
00:09:00,107 --> 00:09:01,806
Graham: Do you guys need
another roommate?
252
00:09:01,808 --> 00:09:03,909
Chelsea: If you take food
out of the break-room fridge
253
00:09:03,911 --> 00:09:05,777
that is clearly labeled
"Chelsea's Yum-yums,"
254
00:09:05,779 --> 00:09:07,245
you get got.
255
00:09:07,247 --> 00:09:09,881
??
256
00:09:09,883 --> 00:09:11,683
Glenn:
Yesterday's "Predator" party
257
00:09:11,685 --> 00:09:13,285
was a disaster
of epic proportions
258
00:09:13,287 --> 00:09:15,186
that nearly killed Dean.
259
00:09:15,188 --> 00:09:17,722
But today is a brand-new day.
260
00:09:17,724 --> 00:09:20,792
Amir: What I bring
to the table...
261
00:09:20,794 --> 00:09:23,094
[ Indistinct conversations ]
262
00:09:27,166 --> 00:09:29,167
Dean: Hello.
263
00:09:29,169 --> 00:09:31,236
Victoria: Hello, Dean.
Glenn: Hello, Dean.
264
00:09:31,238 --> 00:09:33,004
Dean: It's time
for our meeting --
265
00:09:33,006 --> 00:09:35,173
human meeting that humans have.
266
00:09:35,175 --> 00:09:38,276
What, uh, properties
are we looking at, team?
267
00:09:38,278 --> 00:09:40,345
Amir: I was just telling
Victoria that I actually
268
00:09:40,347 --> 00:09:42,213
just sold the three-family
in Silver Lake.
269
00:09:42,215 --> 00:09:43,748
Dean: Place your hands
on the table.
270
00:09:43,750 --> 00:09:45,250
Everyone do that.
271
00:09:45,252 --> 00:09:47,686
Everyone just place your hands
on the table.
272
00:09:47,688 --> 00:09:50,322
Thank you.
Chelsea: Okay.
273
00:09:50,324 --> 00:09:51,990
Dean: No one --
No one hold anything.
274
00:09:51,992 --> 00:09:54,626
Put things down.
275
00:09:54,628 --> 00:09:57,228
Andrew: We have a beautiful --
a seven-bedroom.
276
00:09:57,230 --> 00:09:58,897
Baxter: Up in Calabasas.
277
00:09:58,899 --> 00:10:00,065
Dean: Why are you
approaching me?
278
00:10:00,067 --> 00:10:01,199
There's no need.
I can hear you.
279
00:10:01,201 --> 00:10:02,867
Baxter: Okay.
280
00:10:02,869 --> 00:10:04,235
Well, it's just -- It's very --
It's great.
281
00:10:04,237 --> 00:10:06,137
Dean: Hands down. Hands down.
Hands down.
282
00:10:06,139 --> 00:10:08,873
Baxter: It's on -- It's on 16
acres, so it's very secluded.
283
00:10:08,875 --> 00:10:10,208
Dean: Too secluded.
16 acres.
284
00:10:10,210 --> 00:10:12,077
There's so much room to hunt.
285
00:10:12,079 --> 00:10:14,179
It's not -- It's not good.
Don't you see? It's not good.
286
00:10:14,181 --> 00:10:16,181
Amir: You can't hunt
within the city limits.
287
00:10:16,183 --> 00:10:17,782
There's no hunting in Calabasas.
288
00:10:17,784 --> 00:10:19,684
Dean: Well, tell them that.
Tell them that!
289
00:10:19,686 --> 00:10:21,019
Glenn: Dean...
Dean: Pens down.
290
00:10:21,021 --> 00:10:23,221
Glenn: Sorry. Sorry.
Dean: No pens.
291
00:10:23,223 --> 00:10:26,691
Glenn:
So, I've got a property
292
00:10:26,693 --> 00:10:28,793
that's on three acres
in Highland Park, and...
293
00:10:28,795 --> 00:10:30,295
[Coughs]
294
00:10:30,297 --> 00:10:32,130
Dean: What was that?
295
00:10:32,132 --> 00:10:35,133
Glenn: It's just -- I have
a dry...throat right now.
296
00:10:35,135 --> 00:10:36,735
I was just coughing.
297
00:10:36,737 --> 00:10:38,269
Dean:
Keep -- Keep your throat wet.
298
00:10:38,271 --> 00:10:40,171
Glenn: Okay.
299
00:10:40,173 --> 00:10:42,941
Dean: Let's stop talking about
properties for one second
300
00:10:42,943 --> 00:10:45,176
and talk about what we
should be talking about,
301
00:10:45,178 --> 00:10:49,881
which is how the predators
want to hunt us all down.
302
00:10:49,883 --> 00:10:52,050
If you hear clicking,
be sure to --
303
00:10:52,052 --> 00:10:53,351
Mara: Mr. Rosedragon...
Dean: No!
304
00:10:53,353 --> 00:10:55,020
Victoria: Whoa!
Chelsea: Whoa!
305
00:10:55,022 --> 00:10:57,389
Dean: Predators!
306
00:10:58,758 --> 00:11:00,125
Mara: That's the third one
today. [ Chuckles ]
307
00:11:00,127 --> 00:11:03,662
Glenn: Dear God,
I've destroyed him.
308
00:11:03,664 --> 00:11:07,032
??
309
00:11:07,034 --> 00:11:09,834
Victoria: My client Athena
asked me to arrange a meeting
310
00:11:09,836 --> 00:11:12,170
with the foot doctor who wants
to buy her house.
311
00:11:12,172 --> 00:11:15,173
Once he enters her world, he'll
realize who he's dealing with,
312
00:11:15,175 --> 00:11:17,809
plus his broker's
a little bitch.
313
00:11:17,811 --> 00:11:20,178
??
314
00:11:27,319 --> 00:11:28,987
Who the fuck is that?
315
00:11:28,989 --> 00:11:32,157
Athena: Vic, he's not
a podiatrist.
316
00:11:32,159 --> 00:11:34,092
He's The Podiatrist.
317
00:11:35,027 --> 00:11:37,829
Our buddy is a pro wrestler,
not a foot doctor.
318
00:11:37,831 --> 00:11:39,264
Victoria: Oh.
319
00:11:39,266 --> 00:11:40,732
Amir: My client
is Brash Roderick.
320
00:11:40,734 --> 00:11:42,267
He's called "The Podiatrist"
321
00:11:42,269 --> 00:11:44,703
because all of his finishing
moves are foot-related.
322
00:11:44,705 --> 00:11:46,705
The Toe Crusher,
The Devil's Pedicure,
323
00:11:46,707 --> 00:11:48,173
The Hangnail Hurrah!
324
00:11:48,175 --> 00:11:50,442
Brash:
Hey, Blonda Rousey.
325
00:11:50,444 --> 00:11:52,110
Athena: Wow.
326
00:11:52,112 --> 00:11:53,478
Brash: I heard you wanted
to talk to me directly.
327
00:11:53,480 --> 00:11:55,246
Athena: Yeah, I did.
8.4, friend.
328
00:11:55,248 --> 00:11:56,481
Victoria: 8.4, friend.
329
00:11:56,483 --> 00:11:58,817
Amir:
8.2 is a fair offer.
330
00:11:58,819 --> 00:12:01,953
All cash. Easy close.
331
00:12:01,955 --> 00:12:03,154
Victoria: I think we can do
better than that.
332
00:12:03,156 --> 00:12:04,956
Athena: Yep.
Brash: 8.2.
333
00:12:04,958 --> 00:12:06,958
I keep the washer-dryer,
334
00:12:06,960 --> 00:12:09,260
and you clean up that dirty
basement of yours, sweetheart.
335
00:12:09,262 --> 00:12:12,163
Athena: There's a better way
to settle this -- one-on-one.
336
00:12:12,165 --> 00:12:14,032
Why don't you hop
in here, buddy?
337
00:12:14,034 --> 00:12:15,867
Amir: Ohh!
Athena: Bring it in here, buddy.
338
00:12:15,869 --> 00:12:17,168
Amir:
You want to settle this?
339
00:12:17,170 --> 00:12:18,803
You want to get
your bunions shaved?
340
00:12:18,805 --> 00:12:21,005
Athena: Let's negotiate
the agreement here.
341
00:12:21,007 --> 00:12:25,276
Brash: The Doctor is about
to make a house call.
342
00:12:25,278 --> 00:12:26,878
Amir: God...
343
00:12:26,880 --> 00:12:28,413
Give me, like,
a three, two, one.
344
00:12:28,415 --> 00:12:29,981
Holy shit!
345
00:12:29,983 --> 00:12:32,383
My buyer is gonna fight
Victoria's seller?
346
00:12:32,385 --> 00:12:34,819
Ohh. I have a total violence
boner right now.
347
00:12:34,821 --> 00:12:36,221
Ha!
348
00:12:36,223 --> 00:12:39,224
Victoria: Amir, get in
the elevator and hit "B"
349
00:12:39,226 --> 00:12:42,327
'cause you're going down,
brother.
350
00:12:47,900 --> 00:12:51,402
Chelsea: I got a call out of the
blue from the notorious Vitali,
351
00:12:51,404 --> 00:12:53,404
an old client of Baxter
and Andrew's.
352
00:12:53,406 --> 00:12:57,342
He's got a reputation,
but he's incredibly rich.
353
00:12:57,344 --> 00:13:01,780
Apparently too rich for Baxter
and Andrew's blood.
354
00:13:01,782 --> 00:13:03,848
Vitali: Thank you for coming.
Chelsea: Thank you.
355
00:13:03,850 --> 00:13:04,983
I've heard a lot about you.
356
00:13:04,985 --> 00:13:06,351
Vitali: You have?
Chelsea: Yeah.
357
00:13:06,353 --> 00:13:09,020
Vitali: I hope not on any
telephonic devices,
358
00:13:09,022 --> 00:13:10,388
which can be recorded.
[ Laughs ]
359
00:13:10,390 --> 00:13:12,056
Chelsea: Oh, no, no.
360
00:13:12,058 --> 00:13:14,225
I have no ties
to law enforcement.
361
00:13:14,227 --> 00:13:16,261
Vitali: Oh, no, but they listen
to everything.
362
00:13:16,263 --> 00:13:18,797
So seriously, don't ever talk
about me on the phone ever.
363
00:13:18,799 --> 00:13:20,899
Thank you.
Chelsea: No problem.
364
00:13:20,901 --> 00:13:23,168
Whatever you need.
So, what are you looking for?
365
00:13:23,170 --> 00:13:24,302
How can I help you?
366
00:13:24,304 --> 00:13:26,171
Vitali: I am looking for
367
00:13:26,173 --> 00:13:30,008
a modest, uh, third home
in the area,
368
00:13:30,010 --> 00:13:33,044
maybe the $40,
$50 million range.
369
00:13:33,046 --> 00:13:34,512
Chelsea: Um, I'm sorry,
370
00:13:34,514 --> 00:13:35,980
I couldn't help but notice
on your hand...?
371
00:13:35,982 --> 00:13:37,248
Vitali: Oh, this?
Chelsea: Yeah.
372
00:13:37,250 --> 00:13:39,851
Vitali: Oh, this is, um --
I had a --
373
00:13:39,853 --> 00:13:41,853
I was putting something
in the trunk
374
00:13:41,855 --> 00:13:43,822
that didn't want to go
in the trunk.
375
00:13:43,824 --> 00:13:46,424
[ Laughs ]
You know what I mean?
376
00:13:46,426 --> 00:13:51,129
But if anybody asks, it's more
clean to just say, like,
377
00:13:51,131 --> 00:13:53,198
"Uh, I was picking lemons."
378
00:13:53,200 --> 00:13:54,966
[ Laughs ]
379
00:13:54,968 --> 00:13:57,135
Just say, "Yeah,
he was picking lemons."
380
00:13:57,137 --> 00:13:59,070
Chelsea:
Picking lemons, okay.
381
00:13:59,072 --> 00:14:01,139
I'll remember that, in case I'm
talking about you on the phone.
382
00:14:01,141 --> 00:14:03,007
Just kidding.
Vitali: Okay.
383
00:14:03,009 --> 00:14:04,475
Chelsea:
I'm messing with you.
384
00:14:04,477 --> 00:14:07,178
Vitali: I don't want to have
to unscrew you.
385
00:14:07,180 --> 00:14:09,147
Chelsea: Um, what?
386
00:14:09,149 --> 00:14:12,851
Vitali: I just mean if you talk
on the phone about me,
387
00:14:12,853 --> 00:14:15,086
then I'm gonna have to,
you know,
388
00:14:15,088 --> 00:14:17,188
just, boop, boop,
boop, boop, boop.
389
00:14:17,190 --> 00:14:19,023
Boop! Boop!
390
00:14:19,025 --> 00:14:21,092
And then, ch, ch, ch -- Boop!
391
00:14:21,094 --> 00:14:22,994
And then somewhere
very far away...
392
00:14:22,996 --> 00:14:26,030
Ch, ch, ch -- Boop!
Ch, ch, ch.
393
00:14:26,032 --> 00:14:28,867
But before we do that,
we go boop, boop.
394
00:14:28,869 --> 00:14:31,970
And then these things
go very far over here
395
00:14:31,972 --> 00:14:33,404
and very far over here.
396
00:14:33,406 --> 00:14:36,107
Ch, ch, ch -- Boop.
Ch, ch, ch, ch -- Boop.
397
00:14:36,109 --> 00:14:38,142
And then these go boop!
398
00:14:38,144 --> 00:14:41,145
And then these get put
on a drone,
399
00:14:41,147 --> 00:14:45,516
and the drone gets flown
to the middle of the ocean,
400
00:14:45,518 --> 00:14:47,085
and then boop!
401
00:14:47,087 --> 00:14:51,222
And then it's very hard
to find you.
402
00:14:52,625 --> 00:14:55,460
Chelsea: Well, I've always
loved to travel.
403
00:14:55,462 --> 00:15:00,198
Vitali: Notice I did not say
any illegal words.
404
00:15:00,200 --> 00:15:02,233
Not one illegal word.
405
00:15:02,235 --> 00:15:04,636
I'm just telling a little,
fun story.
406
00:15:04,638 --> 00:15:07,505
Ch, ch, ch -- Boop!
Ch, ch, ch -- Boop!
407
00:15:07,507 --> 00:15:09,941
Boop! Boop!
Chelsea: I see.
408
00:15:09,943 --> 00:15:13,011
Vitali: Boop! Boop!
[ Trills ] Boop!
409
00:15:13,013 --> 00:15:14,245
You know what I mean?
410
00:15:14,247 --> 00:15:16,381
So, when can you, you know,
start,
411
00:15:16,383 --> 00:15:18,349
uh, looking for a house for me?
412
00:15:18,351 --> 00:15:21,419
Chelsea: How about Tuesday
at 9:00?
413
00:15:21,421 --> 00:15:23,621
Vitali: I think I'm free.
Chelsea: Okay.
414
00:15:23,623 --> 00:15:26,324
Vitali: [ Laughs ]
Chelsea: Oh! Don't put it on a drone.
415
00:15:26,326 --> 00:15:28,092
Vitali: Ohh!
416
00:15:28,094 --> 00:15:33,064
Ch, ch, ch, ch [Imitates
mechanical whirring] Boop!
417
00:15:33,066 --> 00:15:34,999
[ Laughs ]
418
00:15:35,001 --> 00:15:36,401
[ Both laugh ]
419
00:15:36,403 --> 00:15:38,336
Baxter:
We got you back, Chelsea!
420
00:15:38,338 --> 00:15:40,538
Andrew: We had to fake
our own deaths to do it.
421
00:15:40,540 --> 00:15:42,340
Baxter: We are currently
in hiding.
422
00:15:42,342 --> 00:15:44,075
Andrew: Yes.
Hi, nice to meet you.
423
00:15:44,077 --> 00:15:47,045
Uh [As Ronald Reagan]
my name is Ronald Reagan.
424
00:15:47,047 --> 00:15:49,981
Baxter: [ As Bill Clinton ]
And I'm Bill Clinton.
425
00:15:49,983 --> 00:15:52,450
??
426
00:15:56,555 --> 00:15:58,389
Amir: Come on!
Victoria: Let's do this.
427
00:15:58,391 --> 00:16:01,125
Amir's client thinks he can get
Athena to lower the price,
428
00:16:01,127 --> 00:16:02,727
but he's got another
thing coming,
429
00:16:02,729 --> 00:16:07,031
and it's coming right up
his lily-livered ass.
430
00:16:07,033 --> 00:16:08,433
Amir:
My client, The Podiatrist,
431
00:16:08,435 --> 00:16:10,401
is about to teach
Victoria's client, Athena,
432
00:16:10,403 --> 00:16:14,305
the meaning of the phrase
"lower than asking price"!
433
00:16:18,978 --> 00:16:20,678
Brash: I saw mold
in the basement!
434
00:16:20,680 --> 00:16:22,680
Athena: That's not mold.
That's a mural.
435
00:16:22,682 --> 00:16:25,049
Victoria: Yeah!
Amir: Ohh! God!
436
00:16:25,051 --> 00:16:26,317
Come on, Podiatrist!
Victoria: Attagirl!
437
00:16:26,319 --> 00:16:28,586
Amir: Come on!
438
00:16:28,588 --> 00:16:30,288
Victoria: Yeah, baby!
439
00:16:30,290 --> 00:16:33,057
You get that 8.4!
You get that 8.4!
440
00:16:33,059 --> 00:16:34,759
Brash: [ Groans ]
441
00:16:37,129 --> 00:16:38,329
Athena: Ohh.
Brash: [ Laughs ]
442
00:16:38,331 --> 00:16:40,164
Amir: Right in the pussy!
443
00:16:40,166 --> 00:16:41,366
Victoria:
Give him a 30-year fixed!
444
00:16:44,003 --> 00:16:45,470
Brash: I want you to pay
for that tree
445
00:16:45,472 --> 00:16:46,704
in the front yard to be removed.
446
00:16:46,706 --> 00:16:49,140
Athena: That's not
going anywhere!
447
00:16:49,142 --> 00:16:51,042
Boom!
448
00:16:51,044 --> 00:16:53,011
Victoria: No washer and dryer
for you, asshole.
449
00:16:56,548 --> 00:16:58,516
Brash: I'm not crazy about
the view from the bedroom.
450
00:16:58,518 --> 00:17:00,752
Athena:
I can't move a mountain!
451
00:17:00,754 --> 00:17:02,387
Victoria: Shit!
452
00:17:02,389 --> 00:17:04,155
Brash: I want you to knock off
10 grand.
453
00:17:04,157 --> 00:17:05,623
The school districts
are terrible.
454
00:17:05,625 --> 00:17:07,291
Athena:
You don't even have kids!
455
00:17:07,293 --> 00:17:08,760
Amir: Close the deal!
456
00:17:08,762 --> 00:17:12,030
Victoria: Ohh!
457
00:17:12,032 --> 00:17:14,665
Amir: Yes!
458
00:17:14,667 --> 00:17:16,067
Brash: Let's have a look
at that foot.
459
00:17:16,069 --> 00:17:17,268
Aah!
460
00:17:17,270 --> 00:17:19,771
Amir: All cash! No mercy!
461
00:17:19,773 --> 00:17:22,573
Athena: [ Yells ]
462
00:17:22,575 --> 00:17:24,776
Victoria: Yeah!
463
00:17:24,778 --> 00:17:26,544
Amir: Oh!
464
00:17:26,546 --> 00:17:28,346
Victoria: Not her face!
465
00:17:28,348 --> 00:17:30,515
Brash: The Doctor is in.
466
00:17:30,517 --> 00:17:32,517
Ohh!
467
00:17:32,519 --> 00:17:36,187
Victoria: That's right.
Again.
468
00:17:38,590 --> 00:17:39,557
Ohh!
469
00:17:39,559 --> 00:17:41,225
Both: Ohh!
470
00:17:43,128 --> 00:17:44,595
Amir: 8.4 is fair!
471
00:17:44,597 --> 00:17:46,464
You give -- Come on,
come on, come on!
472
00:17:46,466 --> 00:17:48,399
No, no.
473
00:17:48,401 --> 00:17:49,834
Victoria: If he even touches
her face again,
474
00:17:49,836 --> 00:17:51,469
I swear to God, Amir!
Amir: Stop it!
475
00:17:51,471 --> 00:17:52,837
Victoria:
Her beautiful face!
476
00:17:52,839 --> 00:17:54,338
Keep running!
Amir: [ Moans ]
477
00:17:54,340 --> 00:17:56,774
Athena: 8.3, and I keep
the washer-dryer.
478
00:17:56,776 --> 00:17:59,243
Brash: That's fair.
Victoria: Got a real chair.
479
00:17:59,245 --> 00:18:00,578
Athena: Deal?
Brash: Deal.
480
00:18:00,580 --> 00:18:02,180
Want to get out of here?
Athena: Grab a beer?
481
00:18:02,182 --> 00:18:03,548
Brash: Make it a protein shake,
and I'm in.
482
00:18:03,550 --> 00:18:05,416
Athena: Of course.
483
00:18:05,418 --> 00:18:07,118
Victoria: Give me the chair!
Amir: Let go of the dumb chair!
484
00:18:07,120 --> 00:18:08,686
Victoria:
I grabbed it first.
485
00:18:08,688 --> 00:18:10,755
Amir: It's a chair!
It's a chair!
486
00:18:10,757 --> 00:18:12,623
Victoria: It's my chair!
Amir: It belongs to the gym!
487
00:18:12,625 --> 00:18:15,393
Victoria: I got it first!
Amir: [ Groans ]
488
00:18:15,395 --> 00:18:16,861
Victoria: Shut up!
489
00:18:16,863 --> 00:18:19,197
Amir: Where'd they go?
490
00:18:19,199 --> 00:18:22,567
??
491
00:18:22,569 --> 00:18:25,636
Glenn: This "Predator"-induced
PTSD has broken Dean,
492
00:18:25,638 --> 00:18:27,872
and it's up to me
to un-break him.
493
00:18:27,874 --> 00:18:30,141
It's time to do what
the Internet calls
494
00:18:30,143 --> 00:18:31,742
immersion therapy.
495
00:18:31,744 --> 00:18:33,778
Dean: [ Moaning ]
496
00:18:37,516 --> 00:18:40,251
Glenn:
Dean, this is your cake.
497
00:18:40,253 --> 00:18:42,120
Dean: [ Whimpers ]
498
00:18:42,122 --> 00:18:44,789
I don't eat cake, Glenn.
I have this.
499
00:18:44,791 --> 00:18:47,291
I roll up the corner and I put
it in the corner of my eye,
500
00:18:47,293 --> 00:18:49,527
and I call it my Sharpie
and it makes me feel good.
501
00:18:49,529 --> 00:18:51,729
Glenn: We all have
our coping mechanisms.
502
00:18:51,731 --> 00:18:53,231
We're going to confront
this problem.
503
00:18:53,233 --> 00:18:54,866
Just trust me.
Dean: Trust you?
504
00:18:54,868 --> 00:18:56,667
What are you doing?
Glenn: Just trust me.
505
00:18:56,669 --> 00:18:58,569
Dean: [ Groans ]
506
00:18:58,571 --> 00:18:59,804
Glenn: No, no, no.
507
00:18:59,806 --> 00:19:01,873
Dean. Dean, it's all right.
508
00:19:01,875 --> 00:19:03,474
Dean: No!
Glenn: Dean, it's okay.
509
00:19:03,476 --> 00:19:06,577
Shh. It's okay.
Hey, it's just me.
510
00:19:06,579 --> 00:19:08,813
Hey, the Predator.
I'm being cool.
511
00:19:08,815 --> 00:19:10,681
You're being cool, okay?
512
00:19:10,683 --> 00:19:12,216
No one's trying to kill
each other.
513
00:19:12,218 --> 00:19:13,584
Okay, sorry, sorry.
514
00:19:13,586 --> 00:19:15,353
Dean: Is this a trick?
Glenn: No tricks.
515
00:19:15,355 --> 00:19:17,788
Trust me, okay?
I'm calling a truce.
516
00:19:17,790 --> 00:19:19,357
Dean: Hmm?
517
00:19:19,359 --> 00:19:21,259
Glenn: The Predator wants
to shake your hand.
518
00:19:21,261 --> 00:19:23,761
Dean: [ Straining ] Going...
against every...
519
00:19:23,763 --> 00:19:25,930
instinct.
520
00:19:29,201 --> 00:19:31,936
Glenn: Good. Good, Dean.
521
00:19:31,938 --> 00:19:33,704
Good.
522
00:19:33,706 --> 00:19:37,341
Now, Dean, I want to know why
you're so afraid of me.
523
00:19:37,343 --> 00:19:38,442
Dean: You're a Predator.
524
00:19:38,444 --> 00:19:40,178
Glenn: Yes, I'm a Predator.
525
00:19:40,180 --> 00:19:41,879
Dean: I mean, that's what you
call yourself.
526
00:19:41,881 --> 00:19:44,215
It's not like your name is Jim.
Glenn: I can't change my name.
527
00:19:44,217 --> 00:19:45,650
Dean: Why can't you?
528
00:19:45,652 --> 00:19:46,918
Glenn:
You think I look like a Jim?
529
00:19:46,920 --> 00:19:48,452
Dean: You're scary.
530
00:19:48,454 --> 00:19:50,221
Glenn:
Dean, you defeated me.
531
00:19:50,223 --> 00:19:51,756
Why are you scared of me?
532
00:19:51,758 --> 00:19:53,357
Dean: You killed
my whole platoon!
533
00:19:53,359 --> 00:19:55,960
Glenn: That's it?
Dean: That's kind of a big deal!
534
00:19:55,962 --> 00:19:57,562
Glenn: Everyone in this room,
535
00:19:57,564 --> 00:19:59,630
raise their hand if you've
killed a Predator.
536
00:20:02,201 --> 00:20:05,736
Okay, let's count the hands.
One. That's it.
537
00:20:05,738 --> 00:20:09,574
I'm telling you you're a man of
exceptional talent, skill.
538
00:20:09,576 --> 00:20:11,876
Do you know how much I wanted
to kill you?
539
00:20:11,878 --> 00:20:13,678
Dean: So very much.
Glenn: So much.
540
00:20:13,680 --> 00:20:15,379
Dean: But you couldn't succeed.
Glenn: I know.
541
00:20:15,381 --> 00:20:16,581
Dean: Just like my father!
542
00:20:16,583 --> 00:20:18,316
Glenn:
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
543
00:20:18,318 --> 00:20:20,618
There's some issues there.
I want to know about that.
544
00:20:20,620 --> 00:20:23,454
Dean: We were in a canoe.
545
00:20:23,456 --> 00:20:27,425
Father said,
"Crapping my style."
546
00:20:27,427 --> 00:20:30,728
Glenn: Wait, you're crapping
his style or cramping?
547
00:20:30,730 --> 00:20:33,798
Dean: Which is the expression
that everyone knows?
548
00:20:33,800 --> 00:20:36,267
Glenn: Well, Predators know,
"You're crapping my style,"
549
00:20:36,269 --> 00:20:38,836
but you humans say
"cramping my style."
550
00:20:38,838 --> 00:20:40,471
Dean: Yes, so I'm a human.
So which do you think I meant?
551
00:20:40,473 --> 00:20:41,973
Glenn: Oh, okay, you meant
"cramping my style."
552
00:20:41,975 --> 00:20:43,441
Dean: Yes.
Glenn: Right.
553
00:20:43,443 --> 00:20:44,976
He tried to push me
out of a canoe!
554
00:20:44,978 --> 00:20:46,711
Glenn: Fathers, right?
555
00:20:46,713 --> 00:20:48,779
I remember my father had
the same issues with me.
556
00:20:48,781 --> 00:20:50,348
Dean: Really?
557
00:20:50,350 --> 00:20:52,283
Glenn: I wanted to travel
to a distant galaxy
558
00:20:52,285 --> 00:20:53,551
with him to slit the throats
559
00:20:53,553 --> 00:20:55,319
of all these different
alien beings,
560
00:20:55,321 --> 00:20:57,021
and my father said,
"No, no, no, no, no, no.
561
00:20:57,023 --> 00:20:58,589
I'm going with my friends."
562
00:20:58,591 --> 00:21:00,625
[ Scoffs ] How do you think
I felt, you know?
563
00:21:00,627 --> 00:21:02,260
Can you believe that?
564
00:21:02,262 --> 00:21:03,961
Dean: I can believe that,
Predator.
565
00:21:03,963 --> 00:21:05,963
Glenn: Anyway,
then I killed my father
566
00:21:05,965 --> 00:21:07,832
and became the head
of the family.
567
00:21:07,834 --> 00:21:09,767
Dean: Lucky.
Glenn: And everything was fine.
568
00:21:09,769 --> 00:21:12,737
Let's resolve this, okay?
569
00:21:12,739 --> 00:21:14,472
Instead of preying on humans,
570
00:21:14,474 --> 00:21:16,607
how about I prey
on your compassion?
571
00:21:16,609 --> 00:21:18,409
I trust you.
572
00:21:18,411 --> 00:21:20,578
See?
573
00:21:20,580 --> 00:21:23,614
Good.
574
00:21:23,616 --> 00:21:24,749
Everything will be okay.
575
00:21:24,751 --> 00:21:26,017
Dean: Thank you, Predator.
576
00:21:26,019 --> 00:21:27,652
Glenn: You defeated me.
577
00:21:27,654 --> 00:21:29,620
Dean: I did, didn't I?
Glenn: Yes, you did.
578
00:21:29,622 --> 00:21:32,390
Dean: [ Chuckling ] You are one
ugly motherfucker.
579
00:21:32,392 --> 00:21:35,593
Glenn: Sounds weird to say
because you killed me,
580
00:21:35,595 --> 00:21:37,995
but...I love you.
581
00:21:37,997 --> 00:21:40,898
Dean:
I love you, too, Predator.
582
00:21:40,900 --> 00:21:42,667
Glenn: Well,
with that being said,
583
00:21:42,669 --> 00:21:44,802
the Predator is going to return
584
00:21:44,804 --> 00:21:47,672
to...the state of Glenn.
585
00:21:47,674 --> 00:21:49,707
Dean: Aha, Glenn.
586
00:21:49,709 --> 00:21:52,543
Thank you, Glenn.
Glenn: Of course.
587
00:21:52,545 --> 00:21:54,078
It was very hot in there.
588
00:21:54,080 --> 00:21:55,613
Dean: Thank you.
589
00:21:55,615 --> 00:21:57,348
Glenn: It's time for
some delicious cake.
590
00:21:57,350 --> 00:21:59,083
Dean: Glenn, get that fucking
cake out of my office!
591
00:21:59,085 --> 00:22:00,718
Glenn:
Sorry. I'm so sorry.
592
00:22:00,720 --> 00:22:01,952
Dean: How many times
must I say it?!
593
00:22:01,954 --> 00:22:03,421
Glenn: Every day.
I'm a slow learner, sir.
594
00:22:03,423 --> 00:22:04,922
Dean: Cake is for those
in hospice care!
595
00:22:04,924 --> 00:22:06,957
Glenn: Okay, I'll just
get out of here.
596
00:22:06,959 --> 00:22:08,993
Dean: Cake.
597
00:22:11,697 --> 00:22:13,497
[ Chuckles ]
598
00:22:19,604 --> 00:22:20,671
Yes.
599
00:22:20,673 --> 00:22:23,407
You're dead! [ Laughs ]
600
00:22:23,409 --> 00:22:25,509
??
601
00:22:25,559 --> 00:22:30,109
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