Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:01,218 --> 00:00:02,348
[Knock on door]
2
00:00:05,527 --> 00:00:07,527
What's the surprise?
3
00:00:07,616 --> 00:00:09,046
Is it in the bag?!
4
00:00:09,139 --> 00:00:11,009
Is it something
that's on its way?!
5
00:00:11,098 --> 00:00:12,878
It's you, isn't it?
6
00:00:13,926 --> 00:00:15,486
Yeah. How'd you guess?
7
00:00:15,580 --> 00:00:17,670
Because it's just like
the surprise you got me
8
00:00:17,756 --> 00:00:19,756
for my 20th and 23rd birthdays.
9
00:00:19,845 --> 00:00:22,755
I was a struggling college
student. Not when you were 23!
10
00:00:24,111 --> 00:00:26,811
Oh, yeah. That
year I just forgot.
11
00:00:28,245 --> 00:00:30,545
Listen, I need a place
to crash for a few days.
12
00:00:30,639 --> 00:00:33,209
Of course you can stay
here, but what's going on?
13
00:00:33,294 --> 00:00:35,694
They're treating my
building for toxic mold.
14
00:00:35,774 --> 00:00:38,474
Some moron had a
leaky toilet he didn't report.
15
00:00:38,560 --> 00:00:39,910
How did they catch you?
16
00:00:42,520 --> 00:00:44,170
Our water bill was $800.
17
00:00:48,439 --> 00:00:53,399
♪ Through this
journey of discovery ♪
18
00:00:53,488 --> 00:00:57,668
♪ in finding you
and finding me ♪
19
00:00:57,753 --> 00:01:01,373
♪ now that I have
someone special ♪
20
00:01:01,452 --> 00:01:04,022
♪ who brings out the joy ♪
♪ who brings out the joy ♪
21
00:01:04,107 --> 00:01:07,587
♪ inside of me ♪
♪ inside of me ♪
22
00:01:07,676 --> 00:01:09,846
♪ we can become
whatever we want ♪
23
00:01:09,939 --> 00:01:12,159
♪ all we need is lovin' you ♪
24
00:01:12,246 --> 00:01:15,596
♪ that's the way our
feelings should be ♪
25
00:01:15,684 --> 00:01:17,294
♪ you and me ♪
26
00:01:17,381 --> 00:01:20,301
[Off-key] ♪ me ♪
27
00:01:20,384 --> 00:01:22,474
Ooh. [Chuckles]
28
00:01:23,605 --> 00:01:26,215
I'm telling you never
go out with a guy
29
00:01:26,303 --> 00:01:28,093
with a bullet still
lodged in his head.
30
00:01:30,046 --> 00:01:32,266
That was the worst date ever.
31
00:01:32,353 --> 00:01:35,273
Because of him we never did get
through security at the U2 concert.
32
00:01:37,401 --> 00:01:39,321
Wait. He wasn't
worse than the guy
33
00:01:39,403 --> 00:01:41,443
that brought that stripper
with the kid on your date.
34
00:01:42,841 --> 00:01:44,801
Ok, the second worst date.
35
00:01:44,887 --> 00:01:47,717
I can't believe it was worse
than the guy that stole your purse
36
00:01:47,803 --> 00:01:51,333
and went on a shopping
spree. That's right.
37
00:01:51,415 --> 00:01:54,895
Ok, obviously I share way
too much with you people.
38
00:01:54,984 --> 00:01:56,774
Share some more.
39
00:01:56,855 --> 00:01:58,985
I mean, didn't you have
any crappy dates this week?
40
00:01:59,075 --> 00:02:01,335
Just one. I got stood up
41
00:02:01,425 --> 00:02:03,205
at the food court at the mall.
42
00:02:03,297 --> 00:02:05,077
But to keep it from
being a total loss,
43
00:02:05,168 --> 00:02:07,518
I decided to buy
myself something pretty.
44
00:02:07,605 --> 00:02:08,815
What do you think?
45
00:02:11,609 --> 00:02:13,869
I'm still waiting to
see something pretty.
46
00:02:15,570 --> 00:02:18,400
Well, I like 'em, and
that's what counts.
47
00:02:18,486 --> 00:02:20,436
Spencer, as a guy,
48
00:02:20,531 --> 00:02:23,361
what do you think of a girl who
wears boots like those? Well...
49
00:02:23,447 --> 00:02:25,667
Spencer, as a guy whose
choice of accommodations
50
00:02:25,754 --> 00:02:27,934
is either my couch or
the back alley in a box,
51
00:02:28,017 --> 00:02:30,407
what do you think of a girl
who wears boots like these?
52
00:02:30,498 --> 00:02:32,148
Uh, I think they're damn sexy,
53
00:02:32,239 --> 00:02:33,759
and so is the
girl that's in them.
54
00:02:34,893 --> 00:02:37,943
See? This is the
only man I need.
55
00:02:38,027 --> 00:02:40,247
Oh, who cares what Spencer says.
56
00:02:40,334 --> 00:02:42,384
The man sleeps
on star warssheets.
57
00:02:44,860 --> 00:02:48,040
No guy... no quality
guy is gonna ask you out
58
00:02:48,124 --> 00:02:49,824
when he sees you in those boots.
59
00:02:49,908 --> 00:02:52,168
Dee Dee, did you hear the
rundown of my latest dates?
60
00:02:52,259 --> 00:02:54,609
I could care less.
I'm through with men.
61
00:02:54,696 --> 00:02:57,126
Keep wearing those boots,
and mission accomplished.
62
00:03:06,882 --> 00:03:08,062
You awake?
63
00:03:08,144 --> 00:03:11,714
Yeah. You can't sleep either?
64
00:03:11,800 --> 00:03:15,330
No, your couch is comfortable,
but not for the whole night.
65
00:03:15,412 --> 00:03:18,202
Come on. We'll do it
like we did in college.
66
00:03:18,285 --> 00:03:21,895
Head to toe. Yay,
but I have to warn you,
67
00:03:21,984 --> 00:03:23,904
my feet are a little rough.
68
00:03:25,640 --> 00:03:28,990
Eww. I can use these to strip
the finish off my dresser later.
69
00:03:30,906 --> 00:03:33,646
Remember the fun we had
watching reruns of living single?
70
00:03:33,735 --> 00:03:35,345
Gossiping about
people we didn't like,
71
00:03:35,432 --> 00:03:37,742
talking about everything
we want to do with our lives.
72
00:03:37,826 --> 00:03:41,346
Yeah, like how I was gonna
be a big time music mogul,
73
00:03:41,438 --> 00:03:43,218
and you were gonna
fight extra-terrestrials
74
00:03:43,310 --> 00:03:44,880
like will Smith in men in black.
75
00:03:46,356 --> 00:03:50,446
Yeah. Some things seem more
possible after 4 hits on a beer bong.
76
00:03:53,320 --> 00:03:55,240
But we always knew
we'd be together.
77
00:03:56,801 --> 00:03:59,501
I mean, as friends.
78
00:03:59,587 --> 00:04:01,457
Yeah. I knew what you meant.
79
00:04:04,505 --> 00:04:09,245
Um... you surprised nothing
serious ever happened between us?
80
00:04:09,336 --> 00:04:11,076
Well...
81
00:04:11,163 --> 00:04:13,823
We have been
through a lot together.
82
00:04:13,905 --> 00:04:17,255
I guess we're lucky that there's
no chemistry to complicate things.
83
00:04:17,344 --> 00:04:21,444
Yeah, we were smart to choose
the friendship route.Mm-hmm.
84
00:04:34,448 --> 00:04:37,968
Yeah. Friends. Smart.
85
00:04:39,366 --> 00:04:40,796
[Both moan]
86
00:04:42,630 --> 00:04:43,810
Unbelievable.
87
00:04:44,893 --> 00:04:46,813
Aah.
88
00:04:46,895 --> 00:04:48,455
What the hell was that?
89
00:04:51,073 --> 00:04:54,423
Oh, Mona, you're making
a lot of noise in here.
90
00:04:54,511 --> 00:04:55,771
You ok?
91
00:04:55,860 --> 00:04:57,300
I don't know yet.
92
00:05:03,999 --> 00:05:05,439
Spencer, stop that!
93
00:05:07,742 --> 00:05:11,222
What? that sweaty
pumping thing you're doing.
94
00:05:11,311 --> 00:05:13,141
Put some pants on!
95
00:05:13,225 --> 00:05:15,615
Please. You've seen me
a lot more naked than this.
96
00:05:15,706 --> 00:05:17,006
What? Who told you?
97
00:05:18,579 --> 00:05:20,319
Remember freshman
year fire drill?
98
00:05:20,407 --> 00:05:22,147
I was in the shower.
99
00:05:22,234 --> 00:05:24,064
I'll never forget the
laughing and pointing.
100
00:05:25,760 --> 00:05:27,240
You were standing
outside the dorm
101
00:05:27,327 --> 00:05:28,977
covering yourself
with a bag of doritos.
102
00:05:30,721 --> 00:05:33,251
If you have time to get a snack,
you have time to get a robe,
103
00:05:33,333 --> 00:05:35,383
now, put some damn clothes on.
104
00:05:35,465 --> 00:05:38,425
Dang! I forgot how testy
you can be in the morning.
105
00:05:38,512 --> 00:05:40,472
[Knock on door]Good morning.
106
00:05:40,557 --> 00:05:41,987
What now?!
107
00:05:44,474 --> 00:05:48,704
What's wrong with you? Nothing. I'm
just freaked out by a dream I had, ok?
108
00:05:48,783 --> 00:05:51,483
Well, what was it about? A nosy
sister who asks too many questions
109
00:05:51,568 --> 00:05:54,048
and was swallowed whole
by a giant crack in the earth.
110
00:05:55,790 --> 00:05:58,620
Man! I forgot how testy
you can be in the morning.
111
00:05:59,620 --> 00:06:01,270
Come on, Mona.
I'm just trying to help.
112
00:06:01,361 --> 00:06:04,101
This isn't the kind of dream
you share with your sister...
113
00:06:04,189 --> 00:06:06,799
Or your mother... Or
anyone deeply religious.
114
00:06:08,368 --> 00:06:10,148
Ooh! A sex dream.
115
00:06:10,239 --> 00:06:12,329
Mona, you don't have
to feel bad about it.
116
00:06:12,415 --> 00:06:14,065
Everyone has 'em. Really?
117
00:06:14,156 --> 00:06:15,846
Well, everyone
who's not having sex.
118
00:06:17,812 --> 00:06:19,382
So who was it with?
119
00:06:19,466 --> 00:06:21,946
No one.Aw.
120
00:06:22,033 --> 00:06:24,123
Even your sex dreams are sad.
121
00:06:25,515 --> 00:06:28,555
"No one" as in "end
of conversation."
122
00:06:28,649 --> 00:06:30,349
Ok, I'll guess.
123
00:06:30,433 --> 00:06:32,913
Was it the handyman
from our building? No.
124
00:06:33,001 --> 00:06:35,001
The cute waiter at
the lush lounge? No.
125
00:06:35,090 --> 00:06:37,400
Somebody at work?
Enough with the questions.
126
00:06:37,484 --> 00:06:39,444
A movie star? A
cartoon character?
127
00:06:39,529 --> 00:06:40,789
Ooh! A woman.
128
00:06:42,793 --> 00:06:44,143
Yeah, that's it. A woman.
129
00:06:44,229 --> 00:06:45,879
Yeah. Now you know. Out you go.
130
00:06:47,232 --> 00:06:49,632
Well, Mona, I really wouldn't
give it another thought.
131
00:06:49,713 --> 00:06:51,373
I'm trying hard not to.
132
00:06:55,980 --> 00:06:57,900
I just don't think
coco's been the same
133
00:06:57,982 --> 00:07:00,122
since she caught a glimpse
of herself in that mirror
134
00:07:00,202 --> 00:07:01,992
in the shoe department
of nordstrom.
135
00:07:03,553 --> 00:07:07,123
And now I'm afraid she has a distorted
body image. She won't touch her kibble.
136
00:07:07,209 --> 00:07:09,599
I'm just concerned I'm gonna
come around the corner one day
137
00:07:09,690 --> 00:07:11,740
and find her with a
paw down her throat.
138
00:07:13,563 --> 00:07:14,873
That's great, mom.
139
00:07:16,436 --> 00:07:20,476
Listen, I was wondering,
do you ever have dreams?
140
00:07:20,570 --> 00:07:23,570
Well, the valium makes them
almost impossible to remember,
141
00:07:23,660 --> 00:07:24,710
but of course.
142
00:07:24,792 --> 00:07:27,142
I have this recurring one
143
00:07:27,229 --> 00:07:28,749
where i'm at an important gala,
144
00:07:28,839 --> 00:07:31,669
and della Reese comes
in wearing the same gown,
145
00:07:31,755 --> 00:07:33,235
and it looks better on her.
146
00:07:33,322 --> 00:07:34,842
But I guess that's
more of a nightmare.
147
00:07:37,152 --> 00:07:39,152
What is it, Dee? Are
you having bad dreams?
148
00:07:39,241 --> 00:07:41,421
No, it's just Mona
had a dream...
149
00:07:41,504 --> 00:07:43,294
About a woman...
150
00:07:43,375 --> 00:07:45,285
And they weren't
wearing the same dress.
151
00:07:45,377 --> 00:07:48,247
In fact, they weren't
wearing anything.
152
00:07:48,337 --> 00:07:51,337
Oh, I see. A lesbian fantasy.
153
00:07:51,427 --> 00:07:54,167
Well, I'm not shocked. I'm
from the theater, after all.
154
00:07:54,256 --> 00:07:58,086
But having a dream about someone of the
same sex does not mean that person is gay.
155
00:07:58,173 --> 00:08:00,783
Except in Mona's case, where I
am certain that's what it means.
156
00:08:02,482 --> 00:08:04,612
Mother, be serious.
157
00:08:04,701 --> 00:08:07,661
Look at the facts. Mona
has no steady boyfriend,
158
00:08:07,748 --> 00:08:09,268
no present interest in men,
159
00:08:09,358 --> 00:08:11,098
and she could not
be more unfeminine
160
00:08:11,186 --> 00:08:13,356
in those hideous
man-boots she wears.
161
00:08:14,624 --> 00:08:17,504
And she does eat the
hungry-man TV dinners a lot.
162
00:08:18,454 --> 00:08:20,244
If the tool belt fits.
163
00:08:22,719 --> 00:08:25,199
Nah, I think if it were
true, I would know.
164
00:08:25,287 --> 00:08:28,197
Well, maybe it's something that she
doesn't even know about herself yet.
165
00:08:28,290 --> 00:08:30,420
Or maybe she's waiting to
come out to Diane Sawyer
166
00:08:30,510 --> 00:08:32,030
like all the trendy lesbians.
167
00:08:33,382 --> 00:08:35,122
But, mom, i... trust me.
168
00:08:35,210 --> 00:08:37,780
Mother's gaydar has
clocked that girl doing 90.
169
00:08:39,344 --> 00:08:41,224
Now, what did you
want to talk to me about?
170
00:08:41,303 --> 00:08:43,393
Well, it's kind of delicate.
171
00:08:43,479 --> 00:08:46,529
Ooh, it's about
sex. I'm listening.
172
00:08:46,613 --> 00:08:49,273
Actually, it's about
a dream about sex.
173
00:08:49,354 --> 00:08:52,144
Well, dreams are my specialty.
Every whack job in the bay area
174
00:08:52,227 --> 00:08:54,357
comes to me to interpret
their subconscious...
175
00:08:54,446 --> 00:08:57,006
Which I do with
sensitivity and discretion.
176
00:08:57,101 --> 00:08:59,151
The key is not
laughing till afterward.
177
00:09:01,279 --> 00:09:03,149
I'd appreciate that.
178
00:09:03,238 --> 00:09:05,588
Ok, this one was really hot,
179
00:09:05,675 --> 00:09:07,675
and it was me and someone
I've known for a while.
180
00:09:07,764 --> 00:09:09,814
Ooh, really? Like
how long a while?
181
00:09:09,897 --> 00:09:11,067
Like since college a while?
182
00:09:12,377 --> 00:09:13,857
That's not important.
183
00:09:13,944 --> 00:09:16,124
What's important
is it was unnerving
184
00:09:16,207 --> 00:09:19,247
because I'm not sure what it
means about me and this person.
185
00:09:19,341 --> 00:09:21,871
I'm not sure either, unless
you tell me who the person is.
186
00:09:23,127 --> 00:09:24,907
Ma, you gonna help me or not?
187
00:09:24,999 --> 00:09:27,739
Fine. Fine. I have my
theories about who it is.
188
00:09:27,828 --> 00:09:31,088
Now, even though a lot of insight
can be gained through analysis,
189
00:09:31,179 --> 00:09:33,569
the truth is, most dreams
don't mean anything emotionally
190
00:09:33,660 --> 00:09:34,920
unless they recur.
191
00:09:35,009 --> 00:09:37,529
Really? So I can
just forget about it?
192
00:09:37,620 --> 00:09:40,750
I didn't say that. Oftentimes
the best thing to do
193
00:09:40,841 --> 00:09:44,371
is to tell the person who you may
or may not have known since college
194
00:09:44,453 --> 00:09:46,763
that you've been
dreaming about them.
195
00:09:46,847 --> 00:09:49,687
That way everything is out in the
open, and I might even get grandbabies.
196
00:09:53,070 --> 00:09:55,200
Hey. I need you to
look at this budget
197
00:09:55,290 --> 00:09:56,900
for the new Dante video shoot.
198
00:09:56,987 --> 00:09:58,987
Uh, fine. Just
leave it on the desk.
199
00:09:59,076 --> 00:10:00,116
I'll look at it later...
200
00:10:01,339 --> 00:10:02,729
After you're gone.
201
00:10:04,299 --> 00:10:05,819
So are you going?
202
00:10:07,824 --> 00:10:10,174
Mona, you've been
acting strange for days.
203
00:10:10,261 --> 00:10:12,921
Sorry. It's just that...
204
00:10:13,003 --> 00:10:16,093
Ok, this is really
embarrassing, but...
205
00:10:17,138 --> 00:10:19,098
I had a dream about us.
206
00:10:19,183 --> 00:10:21,973
And now I feel a little
uncomfortable around you.
207
00:10:22,056 --> 00:10:23,316
What kind of dream?
208
00:10:23,405 --> 00:10:25,225
Forget it. It was nothing.
209
00:10:25,320 --> 00:10:27,020
Want to talk about it?
210
00:10:27,104 --> 00:10:28,674
Not really.
211
00:10:29,672 --> 00:10:31,202
Did I do this?
212
00:10:34,503 --> 00:10:36,293
No, that's new.
213
00:10:42,816 --> 00:10:45,166
You know, that's new, too.
214
00:10:47,821 --> 00:10:50,611
I am never going to sleep again.
215
00:10:57,308 --> 00:10:58,958
Ok, Spencer, you gotta go,
216
00:10:59,049 --> 00:11:01,049
and you gotta go
now! Up, up, up, up, up!
217
00:11:01,138 --> 00:11:02,748
Oh, naked, naked!
218
00:11:04,228 --> 00:11:05,488
Clothes on! Clothes on!
219
00:11:05,577 --> 00:11:07,227
Mona, what's wrong?
220
00:11:07,318 --> 00:11:10,318
Listen, the thing is,
your, um, snoring...
221
00:11:10,408 --> 00:11:13,368
Oh... kept me up all night,
222
00:11:13,455 --> 00:11:15,585
and, uh, I can't
take it anymore.
223
00:11:15,675 --> 00:11:18,115
So, you have to find somewhere
else to lay... to stay. To stay.
224
00:11:19,156 --> 00:11:21,376
No one's ever complained
about my snoring before.
225
00:11:21,463 --> 00:11:24,213
We're not talking about that, sex
man. Now time to go. Up and out.
226
00:11:24,292 --> 00:11:25,952
Don't I get time to pack?
227
00:11:26,033 --> 00:11:27,033
Oh...
228
00:11:28,600 --> 00:11:30,340
Done!
229
00:11:30,428 --> 00:11:33,948
Can I at least get some
breakfast? Oh... Out!
230
00:11:34,998 --> 00:11:36,168
But it's cold. Out!
231
00:11:36,260 --> 00:11:37,520
Aah!
232
00:11:43,790 --> 00:11:45,830
How's it going? Good.
Just waiting for Dee Dee to...
233
00:11:45,879 --> 00:11:48,059
Mmm. Did I ask
for your life story?
234
00:11:50,971 --> 00:11:53,761
Hey... sorry I'm late for lunch.
235
00:11:53,843 --> 00:11:56,283
I hope you don't mind, but I
brought my friend Gina along.
236
00:11:56,367 --> 00:11:57,887
Gina, this is my sister Mona.
237
00:11:57,978 --> 00:11:59,148
Hey.hi.
238
00:11:59,240 --> 00:12:00,980
You guys look at the menu,
239
00:12:01,068 --> 00:12:03,588
and I'm gonna go find
out about the specials.
240
00:12:04,985 --> 00:12:06,935
Mmm, she's a bossy
little thing, isn't she?
241
00:12:07,030 --> 00:12:08,510
All she needs is a whip.
242
00:12:11,556 --> 00:12:13,036
You're probably wondering
243
00:12:13,123 --> 00:12:14,683
why I'm over here
instead of over there.
244
00:12:14,734 --> 00:12:16,654
Not really. No.
245
00:12:18,433 --> 00:12:19,873
I'm doing a little experiment
246
00:12:19,956 --> 00:12:22,046
to see if what my
mother said is true.
247
00:12:22,132 --> 00:12:24,482
Well, if she said
you were annoying,
248
00:12:24,569 --> 00:12:26,309
believe me, it's true.
249
00:12:28,138 --> 00:12:29,658
So...
250
00:12:29,749 --> 00:12:31,049
Does Dee Dee do this a lot?
251
00:12:31,141 --> 00:12:33,011
What, introduce
me to her friends?
252
00:12:33,100 --> 00:12:34,280
All the time.
253
00:12:34,362 --> 00:12:35,672
But no offense,
254
00:12:35,755 --> 00:12:37,535
I'm not like her other friends.
255
00:12:37,626 --> 00:12:38,976
Neither am I.
256
00:12:39,062 --> 00:12:40,722
Then I like you already.
257
00:12:41,761 --> 00:12:46,551
Oh, see, this is how all first encounters
should go. Usually people are so interested
258
00:12:46,635 --> 00:12:50,285
in impressing the other person they can't
even be themselves. I'm always myself.
259
00:12:50,378 --> 00:12:51,678
Maybe that's the problem.
260
00:12:52,772 --> 00:12:55,082
No. Not for me.
261
00:12:56,993 --> 00:12:59,263
You do know that's
my hand you're holding.
262
00:13:01,606 --> 00:13:04,436
And now you're caressing it. Ok.
263
00:13:04,522 --> 00:13:06,832
Where's Dee Dee
with those specials?
264
00:13:06,916 --> 00:13:09,396
I'm sorry, Mona, but sometimes
when i'm attracted to someone,
265
00:13:09,484 --> 00:13:11,234
I tend to move kind of fast.
266
00:13:11,312 --> 00:13:14,322
Oh, Gina, sorry,
267
00:13:14,402 --> 00:13:17,362
but as flattered as
I am, I'm not gay.
268
00:13:17,448 --> 00:13:20,628
It's ok, Mona. Your sister said
you might be kind of unsure.
269
00:13:20,712 --> 00:13:22,452
But look, you don't
have to deny it.
270
00:13:23,454 --> 00:13:24,674
I saw your boots.
271
00:13:28,242 --> 00:13:29,332
My sister said that?
272
00:13:30,418 --> 00:13:32,588
Would you excuse
me for a second?
273
00:13:34,683 --> 00:13:37,863
I'm gay?! And I love you anyway.
274
00:13:37,947 --> 00:13:41,387
I'm not gay. Why
would you think that?
275
00:13:41,472 --> 00:13:44,352
I didn't really, but I told my
mother... you told your mother?!
276
00:13:45,955 --> 00:13:48,565
I can't believe you Dee
dees have this much free time.
277
00:13:49,567 --> 00:13:52,007
Now look, it's one thing
to interfere in my life,
278
00:13:52,092 --> 00:13:53,962
but you totally dragged
someone else into it.
279
00:13:54,050 --> 00:13:56,100
And now Gina really likes me,
280
00:13:56,183 --> 00:13:59,143
and she's gonna be totally
devastated when I walk out of here.
281
00:14:01,884 --> 00:14:03,764
Somehow I think
she'll get over it.
282
00:14:05,148 --> 00:14:06,148
Oh!
283
00:14:07,585 --> 00:14:10,105
Phyllis, love your track suit.
284
00:14:10,197 --> 00:14:11,287
So stylish.
285
00:14:11,372 --> 00:14:13,292
Thanks.
286
00:14:13,374 --> 00:14:14,464
Got it on sale.
287
00:14:14,549 --> 00:14:16,249
Of course you did.
288
00:14:17,639 --> 00:14:19,769
What a bold choice for a
woman who clearly hasn't seen
289
00:14:19,859 --> 00:14:21,599
the inside of a gym in a decade.
290
00:14:22,905 --> 00:14:25,125
Strong words from a
woman whose ass fat
291
00:14:25,212 --> 00:14:27,432
is currently plumping up
the lips of Melanie Griffith.
292
00:14:28,563 --> 00:14:30,573
Now that's just uncalled for.
293
00:14:32,393 --> 00:14:35,743
But I am so sorry
to hear about Mona,
294
00:14:35,831 --> 00:14:38,401
although this could bring
mother and daughter closer.
295
00:14:38,486 --> 00:14:41,526
I mean, after all, no man
with sight is gonna date you.
296
00:14:41,619 --> 00:14:43,839
So now, you and
Mona can go cruising
297
00:14:43,926 --> 00:14:45,536
for the ladies together.
298
00:14:48,278 --> 00:14:50,978
What are you going
on about, wig-zilla?
299
00:14:51,064 --> 00:14:53,504
Mona. Her dreams.
300
00:14:53,588 --> 00:14:55,328
Lady on lady lovin'.
301
00:14:55,416 --> 00:14:58,506
In fact, Dee Dee is
hooking her up right now.
302
00:14:58,593 --> 00:15:01,343
What?! I thought she was
dreaming about Spencer.
303
00:15:01,422 --> 00:15:03,472
Still in denial, dear?
304
00:15:03,554 --> 00:15:06,384
Well... perhaps
that's for the best.
305
00:15:06,470 --> 00:15:09,170
I don't think your forehead
could take any more worry lines.
306
00:15:12,781 --> 00:15:13,911
[Knock on door]
307
00:15:15,218 --> 00:15:16,518
Hi.
308
00:15:18,004 --> 00:15:20,964
Look, Mona, I just
wanted to say I'm sorry.
309
00:15:21,050 --> 00:15:23,400
No matter who you love,
how you live your life,
310
00:15:23,487 --> 00:15:26,187
or whatever shoes
you wear, I support you.
311
00:15:26,273 --> 00:15:28,013
Although I urge you
to consider open toe,
312
00:15:28,101 --> 00:15:29,491
at least in the spring.
313
00:15:31,191 --> 00:15:33,321
I guess I'm a
little to blame, too.
314
00:15:33,410 --> 00:15:36,890
I mean, if I'd just been honest with
you, none of this would have happened.
315
00:15:36,979 --> 00:15:39,759
Dee Dee, I dreamed
about... Spencer.
316
00:15:39,851 --> 00:15:41,851
Spencer?
317
00:15:41,941 --> 00:15:44,731
It was a dream. You could
have had anybody, but Spencer?
318
00:15:47,076 --> 00:15:49,906
No wonder you were
ashamed to talk about it.
319
00:15:49,992 --> 00:15:51,432
I wasn't ashamed of it,
320
00:15:51,515 --> 00:15:53,165
I just didn't know
what to make of 'em.
321
00:15:53,256 --> 00:15:55,686
"'Em"? there's
been more than one?
322
00:15:57,130 --> 00:16:00,180
Does Spencer know? He doesn't
need to have that information.
323
00:16:00,263 --> 00:16:02,353
It would just confuse him.
324
00:16:02,439 --> 00:16:03,959
Look, Mona,
325
00:16:04,050 --> 00:16:06,180
keeping secrets is
just as bad for friends
326
00:16:06,269 --> 00:16:07,749
as it is for sisters.
327
00:16:07,836 --> 00:16:10,226
Spencer will understand,
and you'll feel better.
328
00:16:10,317 --> 00:16:12,707
You'll also have less reason
to mislead innocent people
329
00:16:12,797 --> 00:16:14,317
into thinking you're gay.
330
00:16:15,539 --> 00:16:18,929
Puh-lease. Only you and your
crazy mother would believe that.
331
00:16:19,021 --> 00:16:21,891
Mona Rose Thorne, I
had to hear it on the street!
332
00:16:24,418 --> 00:16:26,378
Of course, I didn't
believe it, but if it is true,
333
00:16:26,463 --> 00:16:27,863
I got a girl I want you to meet.
334
00:16:29,249 --> 00:16:32,249
What? A test tube grandbabies
are better than none at all.
335
00:16:37,300 --> 00:16:40,300
Listen, Mona, this weirdness
with us has gone on long enough,
336
00:16:40,390 --> 00:16:42,740
and it's stupid to pretend
I don't why you're upset.
337
00:16:42,827 --> 00:16:44,127
You know?
338
00:16:44,220 --> 00:16:45,530
How long have we been friends?
339
00:16:45,613 --> 00:16:47,443
Please. I know you kicked me out
340
00:16:47,528 --> 00:16:50,308
'cause I used your toothbrush.
You used my toothbrush?!
341
00:16:50,400 --> 00:16:52,660
I was desperate. I
dropped mine in the toilet
342
00:16:52,750 --> 00:16:54,930
and I had just eaten that
whole bag of twizzlers...
343
00:16:55,014 --> 00:16:56,324
You ate my candy, too?!
344
00:16:57,842 --> 00:17:01,062
You didn't know? Then is it
because I used your eyelash curler?
345
00:17:01,150 --> 00:17:03,110
I really didn't know
what it was for,
346
00:17:03,196 --> 00:17:05,716
and you don't want to
know what I did with it.
347
00:17:05,807 --> 00:17:08,107
Ew, that's not it, and
please don't guess again
348
00:17:08,201 --> 00:17:10,331
'cause I already want
to burn everything I own.
349
00:17:11,465 --> 00:17:14,945
[Sighs] Ok, this is
so... Embarrassing,
350
00:17:15,034 --> 00:17:17,824
but the reason I've
been acting weird
351
00:17:17,906 --> 00:17:21,516
is I had a dream... About you.
352
00:17:21,605 --> 00:17:23,605
Well, about us.
353
00:17:23,694 --> 00:17:25,134
Yeah, so?
354
00:17:25,218 --> 00:17:27,128
So, it's just...
355
00:17:27,220 --> 00:17:29,480
Ok, you know that
scene in monster's ball
356
00:17:29,570 --> 00:17:31,790
where Halle Berry asks Billy
Bob to make her feel good?
357
00:17:31,876 --> 00:17:34,836
Well, let's just say
you made me feel good.
358
00:17:36,664 --> 00:17:37,884
Really?
359
00:17:37,969 --> 00:17:40,099
You had a sex
dream about me? Ha!
360
00:17:41,321 --> 00:17:43,761
How many times did
I make you feel good?
361
00:17:43,845 --> 00:17:45,365
Spencer!
362
00:17:45,455 --> 00:17:47,495
Mona, lots of ladies
dream about me.
363
00:17:47,588 --> 00:17:49,368
It's cool. I'm used to it.
364
00:17:49,459 --> 00:17:51,159
I just can't believe
you didn't tell me.
365
00:17:51,244 --> 00:17:52,854
So, you don't
think it's strange?
366
00:17:52,941 --> 00:17:54,941
Everything you do
is a little strange.
367
00:17:55,987 --> 00:17:57,547
But if it makes
you feel any better,
368
00:17:57,641 --> 00:17:59,511
there's a logical
reason for these dreams.
369
00:17:59,600 --> 00:18:00,690
Really? yeah.
370
00:18:00,775 --> 00:18:02,295
I'm the perfect man.
371
00:18:05,562 --> 00:18:08,522
And since you can't get
with all this perfection,
372
00:18:08,609 --> 00:18:11,179
you just want
someone just like me.
373
00:18:11,264 --> 00:18:13,964
Yeah, that must be it.
374
00:18:14,049 --> 00:18:17,359
So, now that that's out, can
I crash on your couch again?
375
00:18:17,444 --> 00:18:21,234
Why not? But just because I'm
gonna be naked in your house
376
00:18:21,317 --> 00:18:24,147
doesn't mean you can have your
way with me. Remember, Mona,
377
00:18:24,233 --> 00:18:25,933
no means no.
378
00:18:29,847 --> 00:18:31,067
[Sighs]
379
00:18:34,069 --> 00:18:35,329
What?
380
00:18:35,418 --> 00:18:36,988
Nothing!
381
00:18:38,508 --> 00:18:40,208
It's just after
everything you told me,
382
00:18:40,293 --> 00:18:42,303
it's been pretty hard
to concentrate on work.
383
00:18:42,382 --> 00:18:45,602
See, this is exactly why
I didn't want to tell you.
384
00:18:45,689 --> 00:18:48,259
I knew you'd over think it.
385
00:18:48,344 --> 00:18:50,394
Actually, the only thing
I've been thinking about
386
00:18:50,477 --> 00:18:52,517
is what it would be
like if we did hook up.
387
00:18:52,609 --> 00:18:55,089
Spencer, you're my best friend.
388
00:18:55,177 --> 00:18:57,827
If we did something like that,
there would be no turning back.
389
00:18:57,919 --> 00:19:00,699
I mean, it would completely
change everything.
390
00:19:00,791 --> 00:19:02,321
I know.
391
00:19:05,883 --> 00:19:08,153
Ok, Spencer, I can't
take this anymore,
392
00:19:08,234 --> 00:19:10,764
because the truth
is, you're the one.
393
00:19:10,845 --> 00:19:12,235
I know.
394
00:19:18,418 --> 00:19:19,768
What the hell was that?
395
00:19:38,612 --> 00:19:40,182
Excuse me. Who are you?
396
00:19:40,266 --> 00:19:41,786
I'm the man of your dreams.
397
00:19:42,920 --> 00:19:45,100
Graduated top of your class,
398
00:19:45,184 --> 00:19:48,104
independently wealthy,
and speaks 3 languages?
399
00:19:48,187 --> 00:19:50,967
Oui. Si. Sawa.
400
00:19:57,587 --> 00:19:59,587
Listen...
401
00:19:59,676 --> 00:20:01,806
I don't sleep with
shirtless guys I don't know.
402
00:20:04,377 --> 00:20:05,897
But in your dreams,
403
00:20:05,987 --> 00:20:08,687
you can do whatever
you want... Guilt free.
404
00:20:10,818 --> 00:20:12,988
In that case, get naked.
405
00:20:14,082 --> 00:20:15,872
And when I'm done,
406
00:20:15,953 --> 00:20:17,563
get me a gallon of ice cream.
407
00:20:17,613 --> 00:20:22,163
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
30957
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof