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1
00:00:01,635 --> 00:00:02,936
- Good morning, all.
2
00:00:02,970 --> 00:00:05,105
Sorry, no time for
morning discourse.
3
00:00:05,138 --> 00:00:07,508
I'm running late for work.
4
00:00:07,541 --> 00:00:08,876
- Did he say late for work?
5
00:00:08,909 --> 00:00:09,877
- Wait for it.
6
00:00:09,910 --> 00:00:14,548
Five, four, three,
two, one.
7
00:00:26,593 --> 00:00:29,296
- I keep forgetting.
8
00:00:29,329 --> 00:00:30,397
I'm retired now.
9
00:00:33,667 --> 00:00:36,737
- This is the fourth time
in two weeks he's done this.
10
00:00:36,770 --> 00:00:38,238
- What do you think
that's about?
11
00:00:38,272 --> 00:00:39,840
- Retirement grief.
12
00:00:39,873 --> 00:00:41,975
My sixth husband
struggled with it.
13
00:00:42,009 --> 00:00:44,344
He'd get up just like
Reginald and show up to work
14
00:00:44,378 --> 00:00:46,346
months after he was retired.
15
00:00:46,380 --> 00:00:48,081
- Aw, it sounds
kind of sweet.
16
00:00:48,115 --> 00:00:49,683
- He was a gynecologist.
17
00:00:49,716 --> 00:00:51,919
Nothing sweet about
a strange man popping up
18
00:00:51,952 --> 00:00:53,954
in the middle of your
pap smear.
19
00:00:53,987 --> 00:00:55,055
- Ooh!
20
00:00:55,088 --> 00:00:56,957
- Turns out they frown
upon that.
21
00:00:56,990 --> 00:00:59,092
Lesson learned.
22
00:00:59,126 --> 00:01:01,061
- Okay, on that note,
23
00:01:01,094 --> 00:01:02,229
Miss Anastasia, come on,
24
00:01:02,262 --> 00:01:04,064
let's go check
your blood sugar.
25
00:01:04,097 --> 00:01:05,632
[laughing]
26
00:01:08,969 --> 00:01:10,671
- Why you trying to act
all like that?
27
00:01:10,704 --> 00:01:13,440
- Mr. Brown, you said
that car was in perfect shape.
28
00:01:13,473 --> 00:01:15,809
Alright, now yesterday, it
started making a noise like
29
00:01:15,843 --> 00:01:18,645
it had high cholesterol, a touch
of gout,
30
00:01:18,679 --> 00:01:22,583
or like it's been smoking
since it was 12.
31
00:01:22,616 --> 00:01:25,118
- You talking about
the car or Vinny?
32
00:01:25,152 --> 00:01:29,389
- I didn't start smoking
cigarettes until I was 20.
33
00:01:29,423 --> 00:01:33,694
I was smoking pipes
when I was 12.
34
00:01:33,727 --> 00:01:36,496
- Well, it was working
just fine last week,
35
00:01:36,530 --> 00:01:38,131
now it's making weird
sounds.
36
00:01:38,165 --> 00:01:41,835
- Oh, hey, do it make a sound
like cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck?
37
00:01:41,869 --> 00:01:44,171
Cluck, cluck, cluck,
cluck?
38
00:01:44,204 --> 00:01:45,973
'Cause if it's making them
kind of sounds, that means
39
00:01:46,006 --> 00:01:47,941
you got the windshield
wipers and the headlights on
40
00:01:47,975 --> 00:01:49,476
at the same time.
41
00:01:49,510 --> 00:01:51,011
You--you can't do that.
Don't do that.
42
00:01:51,111 --> 00:01:52,479
- You know, I made that
sound one time
43
00:01:52,513 --> 00:01:54,147
when I was having sex.
44
00:01:54,181 --> 00:01:56,283
Turns out I was having
a heart attack.
45
00:01:56,316 --> 00:01:59,586
I was going
k-k-k-k-k-k-k-k.
46
00:01:59,620 --> 00:02:02,055
Call 911!
[laughs]
47
00:02:02,089 --> 00:02:04,858
- If you ever hear
the car going gu-gu-gu-gu.
48
00:02:04,892 --> 00:02:06,827
Gu-gu-gu-gu-gu,
like that.
49
00:02:06,860 --> 00:02:08,962
That means you need to put
some low octane gas in it,
50
00:02:09,062 --> 00:02:11,231
then on top of it, put
high octane,
51
00:02:11,265 --> 00:02:12,833
then a sprinkle of hot sauce.
52
00:02:12,866 --> 00:02:14,735
Just like lightly,
just hot sauce.
53
00:02:14,768 --> 00:02:16,103
- That don't sound right.
54
00:02:16,136 --> 00:02:17,538
- Oh, and if you ever hear
it going...
55
00:02:17,571 --> 00:02:21,508
[beatboxing]
56
00:02:21,542 --> 00:02:22,876
That mean I left my
Dougie Fresh tape
57
00:02:22,910 --> 00:02:25,279
in the cassette deck.
- [laughs]
58
00:02:25,312 --> 00:02:27,414
- Man, I don't know, it's
just making funny sounds.
59
00:02:27,447 --> 00:02:28,782
- Trust me, I had that
car for 20 years.
60
00:02:28,815 --> 00:02:30,584
It's in tiptop shape.
61
00:02:30,617 --> 00:02:32,186
Now, the only sound you
need to be worrying about
62
00:02:32,219 --> 00:02:35,722
is whoop-whoop-whoop,
whoop-whoop-whoop.
63
00:02:35,756 --> 00:02:37,324
- Why? What's that?
64
00:02:37,357 --> 00:02:38,926
- That means you're getting
stopped by the police.
65
00:02:38,959 --> 00:02:40,327
You don't need that
smoke again.
66
00:02:40,360 --> 00:02:41,895
- No, you don't.
67
00:02:41,929 --> 00:02:43,697
- I gotta run down
to the church. I'll see y'all!
68
00:02:45,232 --> 00:02:47,568
- [doorbell rings]
69
00:02:47,601 --> 00:02:49,101
- Why are you looking at
me like that?
70
00:02:49,102 --> 00:02:50,737
Man, you know we needed
a new car.
71
00:02:50,771 --> 00:02:52,439
Philip about to start
driving soon.
72
00:02:52,472 --> 00:02:55,275
- Two things my daddy told
me when I was a little boy.
73
00:02:55,309 --> 00:02:57,010
Number one:
never buy a car
74
00:02:57,110 --> 00:03:00,914
from a man
dressed like a clown. Okay?
75
00:03:00,948 --> 00:03:03,617
And number two:
stop smoking my cigarettes!
76
00:03:05,344 --> 00:03:09,114
{\an8}
- ♪ No matter what you do I love you ♪
77
00:03:09,147 --> 00:03:10,949
{\an8}
♪ No matter where you go
78
00:03:10,983 --> 00:03:13,118
{\an8}
♪ I'm behind you for sure
79
00:03:13,151 --> 00:03:16,088
{\an8}
♪ Always remember, blood ain't never water ♪
80
00:03:16,121 --> 00:03:18,557
{\an8}
♪ We'll make it if we stay together ♪♪
81
00:03:20,875 --> 00:03:24,913
{\an8}
- ♪
82
00:03:24,946 --> 00:03:27,816
{\an8}
- Guys, Reginald needs our help.
83
00:03:27,849 --> 00:03:30,218
{\an8}
There are seven stages to retirement grief:
84
00:03:30,251 --> 00:03:32,821
{\an8}
shock, frustration, anxiety, anger,
85
00:03:32,854 --> 00:03:35,323
{\an8}
being out of sync, feeling lost, irrelevant.
86
00:03:35,356 --> 00:03:39,060
{\an8}
He's gone through three since breakfast.
87
00:03:39,094 --> 00:03:41,229
{\an8}
- [smacking]
88
00:03:41,262 --> 00:03:43,231
{\an8}
- Well, I'm going through my anger stage right now
89
00:03:43,264 --> 00:03:47,001
{\an8}
if Efe don't stop smacking over there.
90
00:03:47,035 --> 00:03:49,971
{\an8}
- I'm sorry, this oxtail is divine.
91
00:03:50,004 --> 00:03:52,807
{\an8}
It's taking my taste buds to heaven.
92
00:03:52,841 --> 00:03:57,011
{\an8}
- Well, it's taking my ear buds to hell.
93
00:03:57,045 --> 00:03:59,714
{\an8}
- Fine, I'll finish it in my room.
94
00:03:59,748 --> 00:04:02,150
{\an8}
- Thank you. And close the door so we can't hear you.
95
00:04:02,183 --> 00:04:04,119
{\an8}
- Oh, Reginald.
96
00:04:04,152 --> 00:04:06,421
{\an8}
Just the man we were talking about.
97
00:04:06,454 --> 00:04:07,889
{\an8}
Come, come.
98
00:04:08,990 --> 00:04:10,158
Sit.
99
00:04:11,159 --> 00:04:12,894
- What is this about?
100
00:04:12,927 --> 00:04:14,863
- Well, apparently, you don't
know how to sit your ass down
101
00:04:14,896 --> 00:04:16,998
and enjoy retirement.
102
00:04:17,031 --> 00:04:18,366
- I beg your pardon?
103
00:04:18,399 --> 00:04:19,501
- Oh man.
104
00:04:19,534 --> 00:04:23,671
- Darling, we've noticed
some shifts in your behavior,
105
00:04:23,705 --> 00:04:26,775
particularly with you
forgetting that you're retired
106
00:04:26,808 --> 00:04:28,643
and getting dressed
to go to work.
107
00:04:28,676 --> 00:04:30,912
- Well, that's just residual
muscle memory.
108
00:04:30,945 --> 00:04:32,347
It could happen
to anybody.
109
00:04:32,380 --> 00:04:34,249
- You know what? Nobody
ever had to remind me
110
00:04:34,282 --> 00:04:35,750
not to go to work.
111
00:04:35,784 --> 00:04:38,753
It was usually
the other way around.
112
00:04:38,787 --> 00:04:42,223
- I've seen this behavior
in the newly retired.
113
00:04:42,257 --> 00:04:44,793
Will you let us help you?
114
00:04:44,826 --> 00:04:49,130
- Sure, since it's not
like I have a job to go to.
115
00:04:49,164 --> 00:04:53,968
- Okay, so...what are
your favorite hobbies?
116
00:04:54,002 --> 00:04:54,969
- I don't know.
117
00:04:55,003 --> 00:04:56,371
I never thought about it.
118
00:04:56,404 --> 00:04:59,207
- Well, what do you like
to do for fun?
119
00:04:59,240 --> 00:05:02,677
- Mm...I like reading.
120
00:05:02,710 --> 00:05:04,979
- Okay, I think that's
something that we can--
121
00:05:05,013 --> 00:05:06,381
we can do.
- Law journals
122
00:05:06,414 --> 00:05:10,118
and court transcripts,
opinion pieces.
123
00:05:10,151 --> 00:05:11,753
- Brother, if you was
any more boring,
124
00:05:11,786 --> 00:05:14,155
your ass would be dead.
125
00:05:14,189 --> 00:05:15,290
- I have an idea.
126
00:05:16,424 --> 00:05:19,294
Just like in real estate,
location, location, location.
127
00:05:19,327 --> 00:05:21,763
When cooking, it's all
about ingredients,
128
00:05:21,796 --> 00:05:23,998
ingredients, ingredients.
129
00:05:24,032 --> 00:05:26,167
So, now that everything
is measured,
130
00:05:26,201 --> 00:05:28,269
you can put the rice in.
- Right.
131
00:05:28,303 --> 00:05:30,305
- Now you have to measure
it, that's why we measure,
132
00:05:30,338 --> 00:05:32,941
because if you put too
much in,
133
00:05:32,974 --> 00:05:35,143
it could get sticky.
- Ew.
134
00:05:35,176 --> 00:05:36,678
- Okay, brace yourself,
you ready?
135
00:05:36,711 --> 00:05:38,346
- Go ahead, Mr. Reginald.
- Come on, you can do it.
136
00:05:38,379 --> 00:05:39,881
You can do it.
- Alrighty, I'm pouring
137
00:05:39,914 --> 00:05:41,349
the rice in.
- Okay. Yeah!
138
00:05:41,382 --> 00:05:44,185
You did it!
Oh my God, you did it!
139
00:05:44,219 --> 00:05:46,221
You did it!
- [applause]
140
00:05:46,254 --> 00:05:48,690
- Yeah, Mr. Reginald!
- I'm so proud of you.
141
00:05:48,723 --> 00:05:49,958
- [laughing]
142
00:05:49,991 --> 00:05:51,826
I'm sorry, dear, this
is not me.
143
00:05:51,860 --> 00:05:53,661
I'm bored to tears.
144
00:05:55,663 --> 00:05:57,232
- This is bonsai.
145
00:05:57,265 --> 00:06:00,235
A thousand-year-old
art form that requires
146
00:06:00,268 --> 00:06:03,104
patience and time
and--
147
00:06:03,138 --> 00:06:06,207
- [sneezes]
Allergy medicine.
148
00:06:06,241 --> 00:06:09,110
Triggers--triggers
my hay fever.
149
00:06:09,144 --> 00:06:11,379
- Bye-bye bonsai.
- [sneezes]
150
00:06:11,413 --> 00:06:13,314
- Okay, you--you can
keep this one.
151
00:06:13,348 --> 00:06:16,084
- Thank you.
[sneezing]
152
00:06:16,117 --> 00:06:17,719
- Go--God bless you!
153
00:06:17,752 --> 00:06:19,921
- [sneezing]
154
00:06:19,954 --> 00:06:21,256
- Now what are we gonna do?
155
00:06:21,289 --> 00:06:22,924
- It should not be
that difficult to teach
156
00:06:22,957 --> 00:06:24,793
someone how to enjoy
retirement.
157
00:06:24,826 --> 00:06:26,161
- Alright, ladies,
158
00:06:26,194 --> 00:06:27,929
I'll take it from here.
159
00:06:27,962 --> 00:06:29,631
Sitting around doing
nothing,
160
00:06:29,664 --> 00:06:31,299
that's ol' Vinny's speciality,
baby.
161
00:06:33,234 --> 00:06:36,104
Let's move it, Reggie!
[laughs]
162
00:06:36,137 --> 00:06:38,173
- What is taking him
so long?
163
00:06:38,206 --> 00:06:39,941
- REGINALD:
My name is Reginald.
164
00:06:39,974 --> 00:06:41,076
- Come on, man!
Get out here!
165
00:06:41,109 --> 00:06:43,344
People need to see.
[laughs]
166
00:06:43,378 --> 00:06:49,350
- What the--oh my God.
- [laughs]
167
00:06:49,384 --> 00:06:52,687
- What is the meaning
of this?
168
00:06:52,720 --> 00:06:55,190
- This is a work of art.
169
00:06:55,223 --> 00:06:56,825
We got one final piece.
170
00:06:56,858 --> 00:06:59,160
Take it over here.
Just move it, move it, move it.
171
00:06:59,194 --> 00:07:00,862
Looking good.
172
00:07:03,131 --> 00:07:04,665
Take a seat.
- You sure?
173
00:07:04,666 --> 00:07:06,835
- No, man, go ahead,
sit down, man.
174
00:07:06,868 --> 00:07:08,937
[laughs]
175
00:07:08,970 --> 00:07:10,939
There you go,
lean back now.
176
00:07:10,972 --> 00:07:13,141
Lean all the way.
All the way back.
177
00:07:13,174 --> 00:07:14,409
Don't it feel good?
178
00:07:14,442 --> 00:07:15,677
- Okay.
- Cross your legs.
179
00:07:15,710 --> 00:07:16,878
Cross your legs.
- Now what?
180
00:07:16,911 --> 00:07:22,317
- Cross your legs. [laughing]
181
00:07:22,350 --> 00:07:26,254
There you go, uh-huh.
- Okay.
182
00:07:26,287 --> 00:07:28,189
I could get used
to this.
183
00:07:28,223 --> 00:07:30,925
Now what?
- You're doing it, man.
184
00:07:30,959 --> 00:07:32,293
Nothing.
185
00:07:32,327 --> 00:07:33,795
See that chair right there,
man?
186
00:07:33,828 --> 00:07:36,664
That chair is magic.
Get comfortable, man.
187
00:07:36,698 --> 00:07:38,266
All you gotta do is
gotta make sure you don't
188
00:07:38,299 --> 00:07:39,901
put your hand down
on the side
189
00:07:39,934 --> 00:07:41,636
where they have them
little wet sticky tissues there.
190
00:07:43,905 --> 00:07:45,740
- Good Lord, I don't
got time.
191
00:07:45,774 --> 00:07:48,343
What the what?
192
00:07:48,376 --> 00:07:50,211
Cora said if you pour
water on the gremlins
193
00:07:50,245 --> 00:07:52,847
they'll start multiplying.
194
00:07:52,881 --> 00:07:56,184
What are y'all trying to do?
Like be an old rap group?
195
00:07:56,217 --> 00:07:58,219
- This is preposterous.
196
00:08:00,889 --> 00:08:03,057
- Wait a minute, man, you didn't
even put on the cologne.
197
00:08:03,091 --> 00:08:04,726
You gotta put a lot of
cologne on.
198
00:08:04,759 --> 00:08:07,362
- What are you trying to turn
him into a little mini pimp?
199
00:08:07,395 --> 00:08:09,097
What was they--what was--
- Mr. Brown!
200
00:08:09,130 --> 00:08:10,365
- Huh?
- I need to talk to you
201
00:08:10,398 --> 00:08:12,066
right now.
- Honey, honey, honey.
202
00:08:12,100 --> 00:08:14,402
Honey, remember to stay
calm, okay? Calm.
203
00:08:14,436 --> 00:08:17,172
- Okay, what we staying
calm for? What happened?
204
00:08:17,205 --> 00:08:18,673
- That piece of junk you
sold me last week.
205
00:08:18,706 --> 00:08:20,341
- Mm-hmm.
- Is making noises again.
206
00:08:20,375 --> 00:08:23,244
- Oh, was it going
ra-ra-ra or was it the ahh--
207
00:08:23,278 --> 00:08:24,512
- It don't matter.
It don't matter, okay?
208
00:08:24,612 --> 00:08:27,348
As soon as we got in the car, it
started filling up with smoke.
209
00:08:27,382 --> 00:08:29,184
- Oh, well, y'all not to
be smoking in there.
210
00:08:29,217 --> 00:08:31,753
That--that mess up your lungs.
- It wasn't us!
211
00:08:31,786 --> 00:08:35,223
- [chuckles]
Stay calm, Cujo. Heal.
212
00:08:35,256 --> 00:08:38,326
- It wasn't us.
It was the car, okay?
213
00:08:38,359 --> 00:08:40,195
You sold me a car that
got a bad exhaust.
214
00:08:40,228 --> 00:08:41,663
- No, I didn't.
215
00:08:41,696 --> 00:08:43,630
That car was fine when
I sold it to you.
216
00:08:43,631 --> 00:08:46,935
And I'm assaulted by
your accusations.
217
00:08:46,968 --> 00:08:49,204
- These ain't no accusations.
These are facts, alright?
218
00:08:49,237 --> 00:08:50,705
You sold me a lemon,
now it's time for you
219
00:08:50,738 --> 00:08:52,140
to give me the money
to pay for it.
220
00:08:52,173 --> 00:08:53,308
- Ha-uh-uh, I ain't sell
you no lemon,
221
00:08:53,341 --> 00:08:54,776
and I can't giving you
jack.
222
00:08:54,809 --> 00:08:56,077
- Well, then give me
my money back.
223
00:08:56,111 --> 00:08:58,646
- Over--over Efe's
dead body.
224
00:08:58,680 --> 00:09:00,215
We made a deal
mano-to-mano.
225
00:09:00,248 --> 00:09:02,117
And plus, I said
no takebacks,
226
00:09:02,150 --> 00:09:03,685
and my fingers was crossed.
227
00:09:03,718 --> 00:09:05,687
- Give me my money back!
228
00:09:05,720 --> 00:09:07,288
Or else!
- Hey!
229
00:09:07,322 --> 00:09:09,656
Those are fighting words,
oh ah!
230
00:09:09,657 --> 00:09:12,060
- Or else what?
- Honey, look,
231
00:09:12,093 --> 00:09:13,294
I'm trying to keep
you out of the system.
232
00:09:13,328 --> 00:09:15,263
Please stop.
- Or else what?
233
00:09:15,296 --> 00:09:17,031
- [groans]
- Or else I'm gonna sue you.
234
00:09:17,065 --> 00:09:18,333
I'm gonna take you to court.
235
00:09:18,366 --> 00:09:19,901
- You ain't fittin' to sue
me, you know why?
236
00:09:19,934 --> 00:09:21,903
Because I'm suing you.
237
00:09:21,936 --> 00:09:23,138
- For what?
238
00:09:23,171 --> 00:09:25,306
- Defecation of character.
- Uh.
239
00:09:25,340 --> 00:09:28,643
- Your vocabulary is
absolutely deplorable.
240
00:09:28,676 --> 00:09:30,678
- Okay, Mr. Brown--
- Someone needs to
241
00:09:30,712 --> 00:09:33,614
take you to court.
- Thank you.
242
00:09:33,615 --> 00:09:36,151
- Mr. Brown, I don't
think "defecation"
243
00:09:36,184 --> 00:09:38,620
is the word you're trying
to use.
244
00:09:38,653 --> 00:09:42,023
- His false accusation is
soiling my good name.
245
00:09:42,056 --> 00:09:46,661
- Uh, I guess defecation is the
word you were trying to use.
246
00:09:46,694 --> 00:09:48,897
- Oh, okay, well, fine.
Fine, I'll see you in court.
247
00:09:48,930 --> 00:09:50,665
- Fine!
248
00:09:50,698 --> 00:09:51,866
- Fine.
249
00:09:53,201 --> 00:09:54,636
- [screams]
250
00:09:58,264 --> 00:10:00,700
- Please, please, okay,
come back here, please.
251
00:10:00,733 --> 00:10:03,036
Come, please, please.
Baby, listen.
252
00:10:03,069 --> 00:10:06,172
You two are business partners,
right?
253
00:10:06,206 --> 00:10:08,675
We have to find another way
to resolve this besides
254
00:10:08,708 --> 00:10:11,978
you two going to court.
- Yes.
255
00:10:12,011 --> 00:10:14,147
Let them fight.
- Ha!
256
00:10:14,180 --> 00:10:17,183
- In my country, we beat
each other silly.
257
00:10:17,217 --> 00:10:18,818
- Efe, no, no!
258
00:10:18,852 --> 00:10:20,186
- I think I have
a solution.
259
00:10:20,220 --> 00:10:22,122
- Please, 'cause
I'm over it.
260
00:10:25,091 --> 00:10:27,994
- You two seem pretty
set on your stance.
261
00:10:28,027 --> 00:10:29,896
- You're damn right,
'cause he sold me a lemon.
262
00:10:29,929 --> 00:10:33,700
- No, he defecated
my name.
263
00:10:33,733 --> 00:10:35,068
- Never mind.
264
00:10:35,101 --> 00:10:36,903
You say that you want
to go to court.
265
00:10:36,936 --> 00:10:38,872
But what I really think
you mean is that
266
00:10:38,905 --> 00:10:42,809
you want an impartial judge
to hear your cases
267
00:10:42,842 --> 00:10:44,944
and make a decision, right?
268
00:10:44,978 --> 00:10:46,880
- Yeah, that's pretty
much it.
269
00:10:46,913 --> 00:10:48,348
- Yeah.
270
00:10:48,381 --> 00:10:51,451
- Well, it just so happens
that we have a judge here
271
00:10:51,484 --> 00:10:55,155
that's impartial and
who has a brilliant legal mind.
272
00:10:55,188 --> 00:10:57,190
- You're talking
about Vinny 2.0?
273
00:10:57,223 --> 00:10:58,725
- Yes, Reginald.
274
00:10:58,758 --> 00:11:00,860
He's having a hard time
dealing,
275
00:11:00,894 --> 00:11:04,764
and I think with his
retirement being so sudden,
276
00:11:04,798 --> 00:11:06,199
he needs a case like this.
277
00:11:06,232 --> 00:11:08,301
Another case to reinvigorate
him.
278
00:11:08,334 --> 00:11:10,203
- Uh, no, no, huh-uh.
279
00:11:10,236 --> 00:11:11,671
I want a real judge.
280
00:11:11,704 --> 00:11:13,173
I don't want no fake judge.
281
00:11:13,206 --> 00:11:15,175
No, you--somebody gonna
do my case,
282
00:11:15,208 --> 00:11:18,144
they got to be a real judge.
No, I ain't doing it.
283
00:11:18,178 --> 00:11:20,914
- And did you know that
a real judge...
284
00:11:20,947 --> 00:11:24,317
is gonna charge
you court costs?
285
00:11:24,350 --> 00:11:27,287
- Like I said, I think Reggie
would be great for our case.
286
00:11:27,320 --> 00:11:29,155
I think he'd be good
to oversee it.
287
00:11:29,189 --> 00:11:30,824
- Mm.
288
00:11:30,857 --> 00:11:32,392
- Jeremy?
- Fine!
289
00:11:32,425 --> 00:11:35,195
But he better not wear
that stupid Kangol.
290
00:11:35,228 --> 00:11:39,099
- Perfect, you two will get
your day in court.
291
00:11:39,132 --> 00:11:41,334
And now I just gotta
lock in the judge.
292
00:11:41,367 --> 00:11:43,036
- Uh-huh.
293
00:11:43,069 --> 00:11:45,905
- What do you mean you want
me presiding over a case?
294
00:11:45,939 --> 00:11:47,207
I'm retired.
295
00:11:47,240 --> 00:11:49,442
- Well, today, you need
to unretire.
296
00:11:49,476 --> 00:11:51,377
Just for today.
- Great.
297
00:11:51,411 --> 00:11:54,247
- And look, if you gonna
unretire, I got about
298
00:11:54,280 --> 00:11:57,117
2 or 30 parking tickets
I need you to fix.
299
00:11:57,150 --> 00:11:59,018
- I'm not coming out
of retirement.
300
00:11:59,052 --> 00:12:00,652
It doesn't work that way.
301
00:12:00,653 --> 00:12:03,256
- Jeremy and Brown are
in the midst of a dispute,
302
00:12:03,289 --> 00:12:05,225
and they need a judge
of your stature
303
00:12:05,258 --> 00:12:06,726
to settle their case.
304
00:12:06,759 --> 00:12:08,161
- I'm not some child that
you can appease
305
00:12:08,194 --> 00:12:09,662
with some make-believe
trial.
306
00:12:09,696 --> 00:12:11,798
- Oh, it's very real.
307
00:12:11,831 --> 00:12:13,233
We'll have a special gavel
made.
308
00:12:14,868 --> 00:12:16,936
- Can it be made of oak?
309
00:12:16,970 --> 00:12:18,872
- Yes, it can be made
of oak.
310
00:12:20,373 --> 00:12:21,875
- I'd need a robe.
311
00:12:21,908 --> 00:12:24,878
- Oh, we can--we can do that,
too.
312
00:12:24,911 --> 00:12:27,180
Robe, gavel, bailiff,
whatever you need.
313
00:12:27,213 --> 00:12:28,848
Whatever you want.
- Deal.
314
00:12:28,882 --> 00:12:31,050
I'll be in my chambers
reviewing the case.
315
00:12:31,084 --> 00:12:33,153
- Ooh! Yes!
- "Oh yes," what?
316
00:12:33,186 --> 00:12:36,923
What that mean? Is he not
gonna fix the parking tickets?
317
00:12:36,956 --> 00:12:38,057
- We're having a trial!
318
00:12:38,091 --> 00:12:39,759
- We need these tickets
fixed.
319
00:12:39,793 --> 00:12:42,295
- ♪
320
00:12:42,328 --> 00:12:44,264
- Okay, court is now
in session.
321
00:12:46,132 --> 00:12:49,002
- Judge. Judge, I like
your robe.
322
00:12:49,035 --> 00:12:50,370
That's my choir robe.
323
00:12:50,403 --> 00:12:52,839
- The entire court
didn't need to know that.
324
00:12:52,872 --> 00:12:55,408
You may be seated.
[coughs]
325
00:12:55,442 --> 00:12:57,911
Mr. Brown, what was
the exact make and model
326
00:12:57,944 --> 00:12:59,979
of the car you sold
the plaintiff?
327
00:13:00,013 --> 00:13:02,048
- Your Honor, sir, first
I'd like to give honor
328
00:13:02,081 --> 00:13:03,817
to God, who is the head
of my life,
329
00:13:03,850 --> 00:13:05,952
the strength of everything.
330
00:13:05,985 --> 00:13:08,655
Uh, the make of the car was
331
00:13:08,688 --> 00:13:12,192
1999 "Brurk" Park Avenue.
332
00:13:12,225 --> 00:13:13,893
- I'm sorry, a what?
333
00:13:13,927 --> 00:13:15,829
- "Brurk" Park Avenue.
334
00:13:15,862 --> 00:13:18,664
- Oh, a Buick.
- Yes.
335
00:13:18,665 --> 00:13:20,400
- And this car was in
good repair when you sold it?
336
00:13:20,433 --> 00:13:23,036
- Yes, I had just got
the oil change on it.
337
00:13:23,069 --> 00:13:25,905
I got the fluids--
all the fluids changed.
338
00:13:25,939 --> 00:13:27,874
I had the batteries checked
and everything.
339
00:13:27,907 --> 00:13:29,209
And the only time I drove
that car was to
340
00:13:29,242 --> 00:13:31,211
choir rehearsal and to go
to church.
341
00:13:31,244 --> 00:13:32,946
- Ah.
- Matter of act, I used
342
00:13:32,979 --> 00:13:34,414
to sit that robe in the
backseat, y'all.
343
00:13:34,447 --> 00:13:37,750
- And, uh, you have
receipts and documentation
344
00:13:37,784 --> 00:13:40,220
for said repairs.
- No, no, Cleophus--
345
00:13:40,253 --> 00:13:42,722
the mechanic, he don't
like no receipts.
346
00:13:42,755 --> 00:13:45,125
He--he wanna be off the lid.
347
00:13:45,158 --> 00:13:48,695
- So you had your car serviced
by a shade tree mechanic?
348
00:13:48,728 --> 00:13:51,831
- Well, he like to be known
as a independent neighborhood
349
00:13:51,865 --> 00:13:54,901
automotive service provider.
350
00:13:54,934 --> 00:13:56,936
- And so you have a bill to
sale?
351
00:13:56,970 --> 00:13:59,239
- Yes, sir, Your Honor, I have
a "bill to fill."
352
00:13:59,272 --> 00:14:02,776
Right here the bill--
you snatched.
353
00:14:02,809 --> 00:14:05,644
- I can snatch whatever I want.
354
00:14:05,645 --> 00:14:09,983
- It says here that this car
was repaired on Tuesday.
355
00:14:10,016 --> 00:14:11,985
And, Jeremy, you contend that
the car was in disrepair
356
00:14:12,018 --> 00:14:13,353
when you bought it?
357
00:14:13,386 --> 00:14:16,790
- Well, first of all, um,
I would like to take time
358
00:14:16,823 --> 00:14:19,658
to give thanks and honor
to my God.
359
00:14:19,659 --> 00:14:21,127
- You don't even go to church.
360
00:14:21,161 --> 00:14:23,196
- I'm spiritual.
- Amen. Don't judge us.
361
00:14:23,229 --> 00:14:26,399
- Uh, yes, Your Honor,
that is correct.
362
00:14:26,433 --> 00:14:28,401
The day after I bought
the car, it started making
363
00:14:28,435 --> 00:14:29,969
these--these crazy noises.
364
00:14:30,003 --> 00:14:31,337
- What kind of noises?
365
00:14:31,371 --> 00:14:33,106
- It was like cat-cat-cat!
366
00:14:33,139 --> 00:14:34,274
- Objection!
367
00:14:34,307 --> 00:14:36,910
Gonedog it.
368
00:14:36,943 --> 00:14:38,344
Objection, "Your Honorer."
369
00:14:38,378 --> 00:14:41,047
Look, the only time that
car make them kind of noises
370
00:14:41,080 --> 00:14:42,982
is if the windshield wiper
is going
371
00:14:43,016 --> 00:14:45,051
and you have the door
unlocked at the same time.
372
00:14:45,084 --> 00:14:46,685
It's too much for
the "compooter."
373
00:14:46,686 --> 00:14:47,854
That's his fault.
374
00:14:47,887 --> 00:14:50,957
- File says that the car
was smoking.
375
00:14:50,990 --> 00:14:54,027
- Yeah, yeah, because he
sold me a car
376
00:14:54,060 --> 00:14:56,196
with a bad exhaust system.
- The car was fine until
377
00:14:56,229 --> 00:14:58,765
you defiled it.
- What does that even mean?
378
00:14:58,798 --> 00:15:01,167
- It means you're
a defecator and a defiler.
379
00:15:01,201 --> 00:15:02,936
That's what you are.
- Order! Order!
380
00:15:02,969 --> 00:15:04,671
I will hold you both
in contempt.
381
00:15:04,704 --> 00:15:05,839
- What? What should we order it?
382
00:15:05,872 --> 00:15:07,907
Place the order right here?
383
00:15:07,941 --> 00:15:11,077
- Mr. Brown, when did you
get the car tuned up?
384
00:15:11,111 --> 00:15:14,080
- Well, the Saturday before
I sold it to him, Your Honorary.
385
00:15:14,114 --> 00:15:17,183
- And you never had any
issues with the car smoking?
386
00:15:17,217 --> 00:15:19,819
- No, my car holy.
My car don't smoke.
387
00:15:19,853 --> 00:15:21,821
I--I'm saved.
388
00:15:21,855 --> 00:15:23,156
- I think I've heard enough.
389
00:15:23,189 --> 00:15:25,792
- I'm gonna take time to
go review the evidence
390
00:15:25,825 --> 00:15:27,193
in my chambers.
391
00:15:27,227 --> 00:15:29,062
- Your--Your Honor? I like
the way your robe fit.
392
00:15:29,095 --> 00:15:31,197
It looks so splendiferous
on you.
393
00:15:31,231 --> 00:15:33,700
- Your Honor, your glasses
are--those are beautiful.
394
00:15:33,733 --> 00:15:36,669
Those are some beautiful
glasses, man.
395
00:15:36,703 --> 00:15:38,138
Your goatee.
- Yes.
396
00:15:38,171 --> 00:15:41,074
- You're clean. You're
a handsome old man.
397
00:15:41,107 --> 00:15:43,209
- Light-skinned guys
coming back.
398
00:15:43,243 --> 00:15:46,246
- ♪
399
00:15:46,279 --> 00:15:48,214
- [indistinct chatter]
400
00:15:48,248 --> 00:15:50,917
- Oh, he's coming.
He's coming in. He's coming in.
401
00:15:50,950 --> 00:15:53,720
He's coming, he's coming.
Get back to your seat.
402
00:15:53,753 --> 00:15:57,157
- Alright.
- [clears throat]
403
00:15:57,190 --> 00:15:59,759
- Hey!
404
00:15:59,793 --> 00:16:01,861
- The State of Georgia--
- Mm-hmm.
405
00:16:01,895 --> 00:16:03,629
- --has a lemon law.
- Mm.
406
00:16:03,630 --> 00:16:05,999
- To protect the buyer
from unscrupulous sellers.
407
00:16:06,032 --> 00:16:07,901
- Whoo!
- Yeah, that's Brown.
408
00:16:07,934 --> 00:16:11,037
Unscrupulous.
- However...
409
00:16:11,070 --> 00:16:12,972
that doesn't apply
to used cars.
410
00:16:13,006 --> 00:16:15,241
- Ah! Not used cars.
411
00:16:15,275 --> 00:16:16,776
Thank you very much.
412
00:16:16,810 --> 00:16:18,178
- But...
- But.
413
00:16:18,211 --> 00:16:19,813
- There is a uniform
commercial code which
414
00:16:19,846 --> 00:16:22,081
protects the buyer from
the seller,
415
00:16:22,115 --> 00:16:25,885
who misrepresents the condition
of the car at the point of sale.
416
00:16:25,919 --> 00:16:28,154
- I object! Ain't nobody
misrepresenting nothing!
417
00:16:28,188 --> 00:16:29,355
- No, no!
- Order!
418
00:16:29,389 --> 00:16:31,925
- He can't object to that!
- You can't handle the truth!
419
00:16:31,958 --> 00:16:35,094
- Zip it! Zip it!
Zip it!
420
00:16:35,128 --> 00:16:38,198
It should be zipped!
- Yes, sir.
421
00:16:38,231 --> 00:16:40,867
- Zip it!
422
00:16:40,900 --> 00:16:43,670
Go ahead, bro, you got it,
do your thing.
423
00:16:43,703 --> 00:16:46,272
- In the opinion of this
court...
424
00:16:46,306 --> 00:16:49,976
Mr. Brown initially took
the car to be repaired,
425
00:16:50,009 --> 00:16:52,145
because of the smoking.
- [unintelligible]
426
00:16:52,178 --> 00:16:57,817
- But his mechanic, Cleophus,
as he reported earlier,
427
00:16:57,851 --> 00:17:01,254
could not make the said repairs.
428
00:17:01,287 --> 00:17:05,191
So, Mr. Brown sold the car
to Jeremy, who was
429
00:17:05,225 --> 00:17:06,893
in desperate need of a second
car.
430
00:17:06,926 --> 00:17:08,361
- That's--desperate.
431
00:17:08,394 --> 00:17:11,164
Let's--let's let that rest,
doc. Preach on that, doc.
432
00:17:11,197 --> 00:17:13,800
It was desperate.
- I got a car. I got a car.
433
00:17:13,833 --> 00:17:16,803
- Zip. Zip. Zip.
434
00:17:16,836 --> 00:17:19,939
- Okay, as you pointed out
to the whole court
435
00:17:19,973 --> 00:17:23,943
about the robe, you had
this robe in your car
436
00:17:23,977 --> 00:17:27,347
as you drove back and
forth to choir practice.
437
00:17:27,380 --> 00:17:29,649
- Talk, doc.
438
00:17:29,682 --> 00:17:32,018
- This robe...
439
00:17:32,051 --> 00:17:35,755
reeks of smoke.
- Ha! We won!
440
00:17:35,789 --> 00:17:36,923
- Therefore--
- Well, you must have
441
00:17:36,956 --> 00:17:39,826
smoked then.
- Therefore, I rule
442
00:17:39,859 --> 00:17:43,963
in favor of the plaintiff.
- Yeah! Whoo-hoo!
443
00:17:43,997 --> 00:17:46,299
- You're going to jail.
- In your face!
444
00:17:46,332 --> 00:17:48,835
- [indistinct yelling]
445
00:17:48,868 --> 00:17:51,938
- This is exactly why I
didn't mess the judge.
446
00:17:51,971 --> 00:17:55,208
- Uh, uh, uh.
- Whoo.
447
00:17:55,241 --> 00:17:58,945
- ♪
448
00:17:58,978 --> 00:18:01,281
- Is this how you celebrate
victories in court?
449
00:18:01,314 --> 00:18:04,717
By hanging out by yourself
and moping?
450
00:18:04,751 --> 00:18:06,920
- I assure you, this was
no victory.
451
00:18:06,953 --> 00:18:08,755
- How do you figure?
452
00:18:08,788 --> 00:18:10,156
You settled the dispute.
453
00:18:10,190 --> 00:18:13,159
You even uncovered who was
actually at fault.
454
00:18:13,193 --> 00:18:15,161
And the way they were
at each other's throats,
455
00:18:15,195 --> 00:18:17,297
you probably saved
Pleasant Days.
456
00:18:17,330 --> 00:18:20,667
- I presided over a trial
at an assisted living facility
457
00:18:20,700 --> 00:18:22,902
in a choir robe.
- Oh, by the way,
458
00:18:22,936 --> 00:18:27,207
we need to get that robe back to
Brown before he needs it.
459
00:18:27,240 --> 00:18:29,175
- I appreciate your efforts
in all this,
460
00:18:29,209 --> 00:18:32,679
but I have a fear that
it may have had an averse effect
461
00:18:32,712 --> 00:18:34,347
than what you had intended.
462
00:18:34,380 --> 00:18:37,650
All this has done is...
463
00:18:37,684 --> 00:18:40,253
reminded me of what
I'd missed.
464
00:18:40,286 --> 00:18:41,888
- What do you mean?
465
00:18:41,921 --> 00:18:44,324
- I spent 50 years working
in the law, and I was
466
00:18:44,357 --> 00:18:48,795
damn good at what I did
until I realized that I...
467
00:18:48,828 --> 00:18:52,732
wasn't as sharp as I used to be.
468
00:18:52,766 --> 00:18:55,135
Short-term memory loss here.
469
00:18:55,168 --> 00:18:58,004
Can't find the right word
there.
470
00:18:58,037 --> 00:19:01,841
- Mr. Walking Thesaurus
having difficulty finding words?
471
00:19:01,875 --> 00:19:03,743
- I realized that I wasn't
gonna be able to operate
472
00:19:03,777 --> 00:19:06,913
in the position of judge
in good conscience,
473
00:19:06,946 --> 00:19:09,983
so I stepped down and started
474
00:19:10,016 --> 00:19:13,920
my long descent into retirement.
475
00:19:13,953 --> 00:19:17,991
- Losing a step is
the aging process.
476
00:19:18,024 --> 00:19:22,829
But what we all saw tonight
was a Judge Junie
477
00:19:22,862 --> 00:19:26,933
who knew how to control
an unruly courtroom.
478
00:19:26,966 --> 00:19:29,836
Who masterfully pieced
together a mystery
479
00:19:29,869 --> 00:19:32,906
like a Black Perry Mason.
480
00:19:32,939 --> 00:19:35,175
You still have a lot
to offer.
481
00:19:35,208 --> 00:19:37,343
You have skills and
talents that you can
482
00:19:37,377 --> 00:19:39,078
use in many capacities.
483
00:19:39,112 --> 00:19:41,214
You just have to figure it out.
484
00:19:41,247 --> 00:19:42,248
- You know, you're right.
485
00:19:42,282 --> 00:19:43,650
- I know I'm right.
486
00:19:43,683 --> 00:19:44,818
That's my talent.
487
00:19:44,851 --> 00:19:46,886
- BOTH: [laughs]
488
00:19:46,920 --> 00:19:48,688
- And I'm gonna take
your advice.
489
00:19:48,721 --> 00:19:52,959
Maybe even mentor
at-risk youth.
490
00:19:52,992 --> 00:19:54,828
Find a way to keep them
out of the system.
491
00:19:54,861 --> 00:19:57,263
- That is a brilliant
idea.
492
00:19:57,297 --> 00:20:02,202
- Now, I need to go
sentence at-risk Brown
493
00:20:02,235 --> 00:20:03,670
and his delinquency.
494
00:20:03,703 --> 00:20:05,205
- [laughing]
495
00:20:05,238 --> 00:20:08,908
By the way, Your Honor,
that robe is on fleek.
496
00:20:08,942 --> 00:20:10,376
- Yeah. [sniffs]
Smell the smoke.
497
00:20:13,687 --> 00:20:15,422
- How you gonna tell me
you won, you lose.
498
00:20:15,456 --> 00:20:18,359
- Mr. Brown?
- Hm?
499
00:20:18,392 --> 00:20:20,227
- I still can't believe you
tried to play me like that.
500
00:20:20,261 --> 00:20:23,297
Man, we supposed to be
business partners.
501
00:20:23,330 --> 00:20:27,034
- Well...I'm sorry.
502
00:20:27,067 --> 00:20:29,570
I was just trying to get
rid of that old, stupid car.
503
00:20:29,603 --> 00:20:31,238
And you said, "I'm desperate,
Mr. Brown."
504
00:20:31,272 --> 00:20:33,841
You practically started
throwing money at me.
505
00:20:33,874 --> 00:20:36,310
So, I just sold it to you.
506
00:20:36,343 --> 00:20:39,480
- Okay, I mean, I can admit
I was a little bit overzealous.
507
00:20:39,513 --> 00:20:41,181
- Thank you.
- But that don't give you
508
00:20:41,215 --> 00:20:42,583
no excuse, man.
509
00:20:42,616 --> 00:20:43,917
- Well, I'm gonna make it
right.
510
00:20:43,951 --> 00:20:46,253
I'm gonna go page Cleophus--
511
00:20:46,287 --> 00:20:48,555
- I'm not messing with
your shade tree mechanic.
512
00:20:48,589 --> 00:20:49,990
Where is Judge Junie?
513
00:20:50,024 --> 00:20:50,090
- ♪
514
00:20:53,227 --> 00:21:08,174
- ♪
515
00:21:08,175 --> 00:21:08,242
- ♪
516
00:21:23,340 --> 00:21:23,574
- ♪
517
00:21:23,624 --> 00:21:28,174
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