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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,867 --> 00:00:04,100 (dramatic orchestral music) 2 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000 Downloaded from YTS.MX 3 00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:13,000 Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX 4 00:00:16,567 --> 00:00:19,216 (radio tuning) 5 00:00:19,266 --> 00:00:20,717 - At number one on the request line 6 00:00:20,767 --> 00:00:24,750 for the 417th month, from Pepe to his fishing crew 7 00:00:24,800 --> 00:00:26,016 on the Pregnant Pelican. 8 00:00:26,066 --> 00:00:31,066 ("La Bamba") (singing in foreign language) 9 00:00:34,200 --> 00:00:35,483 (thunder crashing) 10 00:00:35,533 --> 00:00:37,367 - Yikes, I gotta get outta here. 11 00:00:41,367 --> 00:00:43,216 (man panting) 12 00:00:43,266 --> 00:00:46,667 (tense orchestral music) 13 00:00:48,567 --> 00:00:52,767 (motorcycles rumbling in distance) 14 00:01:00,667 --> 00:01:01,850 I'm the only one left. 15 00:01:01,900 --> 00:01:04,567 I have to keep my bog hair. 16 00:01:06,567 --> 00:01:07,400 Shit. 17 00:01:11,700 --> 00:01:12,850 That woman's a monster. 18 00:01:12,900 --> 00:01:14,700 I gotta warn the others. 19 00:01:28,300 --> 00:01:31,200 (thunder crashing) 20 00:01:36,567 --> 00:01:40,350 (breathing heavily) 21 00:01:40,400 --> 00:01:41,800 Screw the others. 22 00:01:55,600 --> 00:01:56,884 (car alarm wailing) 23 00:01:56,934 --> 00:01:59,250 - Move away from the vehicle. 24 00:01:59,300 --> 00:02:01,517 Put your hands in the air. 25 00:02:01,567 --> 00:02:02,900 Support the NRA. 26 00:02:04,233 --> 00:02:06,050 Vote Republican. 27 00:02:06,100 --> 00:02:08,383 Always use a condom. 28 00:02:08,433 --> 00:02:10,016 Eat pork. 29 00:02:10,066 --> 00:02:12,834 Don't forget to call your mother. 30 00:02:16,533 --> 00:02:19,700 (eerie ambient music) 31 00:02:26,166 --> 00:02:28,667 (man screams) 32 00:02:33,734 --> 00:02:36,884 - I love the feel of silk on bare skin. 33 00:02:36,934 --> 00:02:39,550 - No more 34 00:02:39,600 --> 00:02:40,500 pesky-- 35 00:02:41,467 --> 00:02:42,817 - Body hair. 36 00:02:42,867 --> 00:02:45,800 (thunder crashing) 37 00:02:49,734 --> 00:02:53,450 - On to the next unsuspecting little town. 38 00:02:53,500 --> 00:02:54,400 Let's ride! 39 00:02:56,233 --> 00:02:57,150 ("Hot Wax Zombies on Wheels") 40 00:02:57,200 --> 00:03:00,383 ♪ So you better beware 41 00:03:00,433 --> 00:03:01,983 ♪ 'Cause we're hot wax zombies 42 00:03:02,033 --> 00:03:04,216 ♪ We're almost there 43 00:03:04,266 --> 00:03:07,983 ♪ We're the hot wax zombies on wheels ♪ 44 00:03:08,033 --> 00:03:11,817 ♪ Hot wax zombies on wheels 45 00:03:11,867 --> 00:03:15,550 ♪ Hot wax zombies on wheels 46 00:03:15,600 --> 00:03:19,266 ♪ Hot wax zombies on wheels 47 00:03:21,200 --> 00:03:23,433 (laughing) 48 00:03:25,900 --> 00:03:26,784 (Sharon laughing) 49 00:03:26,834 --> 00:03:29,483 - Slow down, butch. 50 00:03:29,533 --> 00:03:31,950 - I just love it here in Daneport. 51 00:03:32,000 --> 00:03:34,150 Nothing ever happens here. 52 00:03:34,200 --> 00:03:36,600 (rock music) 53 00:03:50,533 --> 00:03:51,583 - Tipoa. 54 00:03:51,633 --> 00:03:52,700 - You're on. 55 00:04:00,500 --> 00:04:01,650 (bird caws) 56 00:04:01,700 --> 00:04:02,450 (man burps) 57 00:04:02,500 --> 00:04:04,383 ♪ Baby 58 00:04:04,433 --> 00:04:07,850 ♪ When you get back 59 00:04:07,900 --> 00:04:11,483 ♪ Back in your room 60 00:04:11,533 --> 00:04:15,283 ♪ After your move, yeah 61 00:04:15,333 --> 00:04:18,250 ♪ Oh, maybe 62 00:04:18,300 --> 00:04:21,684 ♪ You'll be all right 63 00:04:21,734 --> 00:04:24,983 ♪ When it's dark 64 00:04:25,033 --> 00:04:28,433 ♪ You have your sunshine 65 00:04:31,367 --> 00:04:32,750 - So damn butch. 66 00:04:32,800 --> 00:04:33,750 - That's what you get for biking with 67 00:04:33,800 --> 00:04:34,983 your best friend's girl. 68 00:04:35,033 --> 00:04:37,266 (laughing) 69 00:04:43,333 --> 00:04:44,116 - Race ya. 70 00:04:44,166 --> 00:04:45,350 - You're on. 71 00:04:45,400 --> 00:04:46,850 The old Augusta house. 72 00:04:46,900 --> 00:04:48,283 - See you in my mirror. 73 00:04:48,333 --> 00:04:51,550 (Sharon laughs) 74 00:04:51,600 --> 00:04:54,750 ♪ Takin' off my mask 75 00:04:54,800 --> 00:05:00,583 ♪ Takin' off my head 76 00:05:00,633 --> 00:05:03,283 ♪ It's not my problem 77 00:05:03,333 --> 00:05:06,150 ♪ Refuse to see 78 00:05:06,200 --> 00:05:09,350 ♪ Oh, it's not my problem 79 00:05:09,400 --> 00:05:10,183 (man farts) 80 00:05:10,233 --> 00:05:11,817 - Hey! 81 00:05:11,867 --> 00:05:15,950 - Needs a little fixing up, but it'll do. 82 00:05:16,000 --> 00:05:18,417 Shh, Martin, someone's coming. 83 00:05:18,467 --> 00:05:21,483 (laughing) 84 00:05:21,533 --> 00:05:22,367 - Oh. 85 00:05:23,400 --> 00:05:24,617 "Vickings rule." 86 00:05:24,667 --> 00:05:27,650 - At least I can spell, unlike certain barbers. 87 00:05:27,700 --> 00:05:29,517 - Star quarterbacks don't have to spell. 88 00:05:29,567 --> 00:05:32,116 - You're right, they just have to make passes 89 00:05:32,166 --> 00:05:34,116 at the homecoming queen. 90 00:05:34,166 --> 00:05:36,550 - No truer love than me and Mick. 91 00:05:36,600 --> 00:05:38,684 And what about you, shy guy? 92 00:05:38,734 --> 00:05:40,050 - Hey, I'm uh, 93 00:05:40,100 --> 00:05:41,317 pacing myself. 94 00:05:41,367 --> 00:05:42,266 - Oh, okay. 95 00:05:44,000 --> 00:05:46,317 - Martin, find out how they feel 96 00:05:46,367 --> 00:05:48,850 about depilatil rays. 97 00:05:48,900 --> 00:05:49,684 - Suppositories? 98 00:05:49,734 --> 00:05:50,517 (slapping) 99 00:05:50,567 --> 00:05:51,400 Ow. 100 00:06:01,867 --> 00:06:04,550 - Oh, baby, faster, faster, faster. 101 00:06:04,600 --> 00:06:05,684 Get it in. 102 00:06:05,734 --> 00:06:07,500 Oh, oh, ah ah ah, oo. 103 00:06:09,533 --> 00:06:12,967 (light orchestral music) 104 00:06:15,166 --> 00:06:16,350 - Morning, captains. 105 00:06:16,400 --> 00:06:18,417 - Sven, Sharon. 106 00:06:18,467 --> 00:06:19,283 - Nice day. 107 00:06:19,333 --> 00:06:20,500 - Yeah. 108 00:06:21,834 --> 00:06:23,250 - What do you reckon the weather will be like 109 00:06:23,300 --> 00:06:24,884 tomorrow, Captain Obadiah? 110 00:06:24,934 --> 00:06:26,183 - Horny. 111 00:06:26,233 --> 00:06:29,350 There's an evil wind a-blowing, an evil wind. 112 00:06:29,400 --> 00:06:30,233 - West north west. 113 00:06:31,600 --> 00:06:33,550 - You old shark bait, it's north by northwest. 114 00:06:33,600 --> 00:06:35,417 - Don't you go telling me the wind direction. 115 00:06:35,467 --> 00:06:37,383 I know these seas like the back of my hand. 116 00:06:37,433 --> 00:06:39,350 - You ain't seen that clear-like in 20 years. 117 00:06:39,400 --> 00:06:40,583 (Zebediah growls) 118 00:06:40,633 --> 00:06:42,216 - What do you mean by evil wind, cap'n? 119 00:06:42,266 --> 00:06:44,083 - Oh, he's right about that, by cracky. 120 00:06:44,133 --> 00:06:45,583 E-vile it is. 121 00:06:45,633 --> 00:06:47,050 - Evil how? 122 00:06:47,100 --> 00:06:50,050 - When the sky burns cold, the raven barks. 123 00:06:50,100 --> 00:06:53,417 - Aye, the albatross dances with the whale. 124 00:06:53,467 --> 00:06:54,300 - Aye. 125 00:06:55,967 --> 00:06:58,016 (bird cries) 126 00:06:58,066 --> 00:07:00,533 (rock music) 127 00:07:07,266 --> 00:07:10,250 (Sharon laughs) 128 00:07:10,300 --> 00:07:12,517 - Oh, are you still determined to leave? 129 00:07:12,567 --> 00:07:13,817 - Nothing ever happens here. 130 00:07:13,867 --> 00:07:15,050 I don't know what I was thinking, 131 00:07:15,100 --> 00:07:17,583 trying to make it as a manicurist in this town. 132 00:07:17,633 --> 00:07:19,383 - And so that means you're going to go to-- 133 00:07:19,433 --> 00:07:20,750 - Well, I need to go somewhere where they 134 00:07:20,800 --> 00:07:23,517 can appreciate a good manicure, a great foot massage, 135 00:07:23,567 --> 00:07:26,216 and a, and an outstanding lacquer selection. 136 00:07:26,266 --> 00:07:27,950 Orlando, Florida. 137 00:07:28,000 --> 00:07:29,633 - Well, I'm gonna miss you, Ruby. 138 00:07:31,133 --> 00:07:32,183 (both laugh) 139 00:07:32,233 --> 00:07:33,400 - What? 140 00:07:37,200 --> 00:07:39,216 - She might as well stay here for that. 141 00:07:39,266 --> 00:07:40,884 You heard the latest? 142 00:07:40,934 --> 00:07:43,684 The old Augusta house, sold. 143 00:07:43,734 --> 00:07:46,950 Queers probably, you know, gay. 144 00:07:47,000 --> 00:07:49,016 Opening a beauty salon. 145 00:07:49,066 --> 00:07:53,150 - Mm, good, maybe I can get a decent haircut, Mick. 146 00:07:53,200 --> 00:07:56,517 - Ooh, take that back you sultry bitch, 147 00:07:56,567 --> 00:07:58,517 or I'll blow you silly. 148 00:07:58,567 --> 00:08:00,116 - Oh, I better get out. 149 00:08:00,166 --> 00:08:01,050 (laughing) 150 00:08:01,100 --> 00:08:01,983 - When are you going to get out 151 00:08:02,033 --> 00:08:03,650 of ladies' underwear, Sharon? 152 00:08:03,700 --> 00:08:06,300 - Oh, you know me Frank, I don't do cheap jokes. 153 00:08:11,333 --> 00:08:13,750 (singing in foreign language) 154 00:08:13,800 --> 00:08:14,983 And now for another 155 00:08:15,033 --> 00:08:17,983 swinging hit for you single ladies over 40 156 00:08:18,033 --> 00:08:19,717 waiting for the tuna fleet. 157 00:08:19,767 --> 00:08:22,016 ("La Bamba") 158 00:08:22,066 --> 00:08:22,900 - Mm, 159 00:08:24,100 --> 00:08:24,934 oh baby. 160 00:08:28,533 --> 00:08:30,016 Mm, I just keep getting it for you. 161 00:08:30,066 --> 00:08:32,000 You got me all wrapped around the axle. 162 00:08:33,200 --> 00:08:35,800 (bell jingles) 163 00:08:39,467 --> 00:08:42,600 - Neither rain nor sleet nor dark of night. 164 00:08:43,600 --> 00:08:44,784 - Sorry. 165 00:08:44,834 --> 00:08:46,817 - It's all right, that's what the shop's about. 166 00:08:46,867 --> 00:08:48,383 Sort of. 167 00:08:48,433 --> 00:08:50,483 Hadn't you better finish your rounds, Ken? 168 00:08:50,533 --> 00:08:52,133 - Yeah, I guess so. 169 00:08:53,400 --> 00:08:54,300 Sorry, baby. 170 00:08:55,734 --> 00:08:56,767 Wish I could stay. 171 00:09:02,033 --> 00:09:03,317 Bye. 172 00:09:03,367 --> 00:09:05,734 Oh, the mail, forgot the mail almost. 173 00:09:06,633 --> 00:09:07,600 I'll see you, baby. 174 00:09:08,767 --> 00:09:09,684 (bell jingles) 175 00:09:09,734 --> 00:09:11,717 - He's new. 176 00:09:11,767 --> 00:09:13,583 Wow, you're a sucker for men in uniform, Carrie. 177 00:09:13,633 --> 00:09:16,917 - Oh, I'm a sucker for a man, period. 178 00:09:16,967 --> 00:09:19,583 I've noticed you're not at a loss for suitors. 179 00:09:19,633 --> 00:09:20,450 - Mick? 180 00:09:20,500 --> 00:09:21,717 - Mick's okay. 181 00:09:21,767 --> 00:09:23,417 Sven's a real guy. 182 00:09:23,467 --> 00:09:24,617 And he's interested. 183 00:09:24,667 --> 00:09:28,016 - Sven's my pal, nothing more. 184 00:09:28,066 --> 00:09:29,383 (bell jingles) 185 00:09:29,433 --> 00:09:30,650 Hi, Ted. 186 00:09:30,700 --> 00:09:32,250 - Hi, Sharon. 187 00:09:32,300 --> 00:09:33,917 Pilar's got a birthday coming up real soon. 188 00:09:33,967 --> 00:09:35,183 I thought I'd get her something pretty. 189 00:09:35,233 --> 00:09:36,350 - Great, well, I've got just the thing. 190 00:09:36,400 --> 00:09:38,150 This is soft, it's beautiful. 191 00:09:38,200 --> 00:09:40,450 It's pretty, it's warm, it's soft. 192 00:09:40,500 --> 00:09:42,417 Just the thing for winter. 193 00:09:42,467 --> 00:09:46,183 - I was think something more, you know, something-- 194 00:09:46,233 --> 00:09:47,750 - Sexier? 195 00:09:47,800 --> 00:09:49,884 - Oh, gee Ted, I didn't think you went in for 196 00:09:49,934 --> 00:09:51,550 that sort of thing, but uh-- 197 00:09:51,600 --> 00:09:52,483 - You old devil, you. 198 00:09:52,533 --> 00:09:54,884 - Not that old, Carrie. 199 00:09:54,934 --> 00:09:55,717 - I get the picture. 200 00:09:55,767 --> 00:09:57,283 - How about this? 201 00:09:57,333 --> 00:09:58,517 More of what you had in mind? 202 00:09:58,567 --> 00:09:59,600 It's what I wear. 203 00:10:00,600 --> 00:10:03,350 - Yeah, I like that, yeah. 204 00:10:03,400 --> 00:10:04,583 - And the size? 205 00:10:04,633 --> 00:10:06,917 - Mrs. Lewis is a size 18, Carrie. 206 00:10:06,967 --> 00:10:08,283 (cow moos) 207 00:10:08,333 --> 00:10:09,216 - I see. 208 00:10:09,266 --> 00:10:10,150 - In a box, please. 209 00:10:10,200 --> 00:10:13,884 (singing in foreign language) 210 00:10:13,934 --> 00:10:15,950 - Get a box, please. 211 00:10:16,000 --> 00:10:17,600 - That'll be $35, Ted. 212 00:10:18,567 --> 00:10:21,300 (horse whinnies) 213 00:10:23,567 --> 00:10:27,150 (motorcycle approaching) 214 00:10:27,200 --> 00:10:29,600 (rock music) 215 00:10:32,100 --> 00:10:35,667 - Oh, I love the feel of silk on bare skin. 216 00:10:36,567 --> 00:10:37,367 Don't you? 217 00:10:38,633 --> 00:10:39,467 - Can I help you? 218 00:10:41,166 --> 00:10:42,200 - I said don't you? 219 00:10:43,800 --> 00:10:48,417 - Um, sure, all, all, all, all, all women do, um. 220 00:10:48,467 --> 00:10:50,383 I didn't hear you come in. 221 00:10:50,433 --> 00:10:52,083 ♪ Well, you better step up 222 00:10:52,133 --> 00:10:54,717 ♪ 'Cause I got something for you ♪ 223 00:10:54,767 --> 00:10:56,617 ♪ Just take a good look at me 224 00:10:56,667 --> 00:10:58,850 ♪ 'Cause I'm new and improved, you see ♪ 225 00:10:58,900 --> 00:11:01,016 ♪ Now seems like a real good time ♪ 226 00:11:01,066 --> 00:11:03,317 ♪ Think I'll start coming in with it ♪ 227 00:11:03,367 --> 00:11:05,317 ♪ Hey 228 00:11:05,367 --> 00:11:07,417 ♪ You 229 00:11:07,467 --> 00:11:08,617 ♪ Me 230 00:11:08,667 --> 00:11:10,450 - This won't hinder you much longer. 231 00:11:10,500 --> 00:11:11,684 I'll take care of it. 232 00:11:11,734 --> 00:11:14,000 - Weren't you leaving, Ted? 233 00:11:15,000 --> 00:11:16,016 Will that be all? 234 00:11:16,066 --> 00:11:18,400 - I want to see your underwear. 235 00:11:20,467 --> 00:11:22,016 - I beg your pardon. 236 00:11:22,066 --> 00:11:25,650 - Well, granted, I want to see your leather g-strings, 237 00:11:25,700 --> 00:11:28,417 you split panties, your cut-out bras. 238 00:11:28,467 --> 00:11:30,734 Whatever you have with metal studs. 239 00:11:31,667 --> 00:11:33,183 - Um. 240 00:11:33,233 --> 00:11:34,750 Well. 241 00:11:34,800 --> 00:11:37,567 I'm afraid this is risque as we get. 242 00:11:41,767 --> 00:11:42,550 - Hah. 243 00:11:42,600 --> 00:11:44,350 I'll just take the gown. 244 00:11:44,400 --> 00:11:45,350 - Will that be charge or-- 245 00:11:45,400 --> 00:11:46,583 - It'll be cash. 246 00:11:46,633 --> 00:11:48,784 - It'll be 395. 247 00:11:48,834 --> 00:11:50,317 - Hot, M. 248 00:11:50,367 --> 00:11:52,517 (fingers snapping) 249 00:11:52,567 --> 00:11:54,917 I suggest you invest in some 250 00:11:54,967 --> 00:11:58,784 recreational underwear, Miss Talbot. 251 00:11:58,834 --> 00:12:00,166 You're going to need it. 252 00:12:01,533 --> 00:12:04,133 I think these people are ready for a wax. 253 00:12:05,033 --> 00:12:06,083 - Who's Max? 254 00:12:06,133 --> 00:12:07,417 Ow! 255 00:12:07,467 --> 00:12:08,850 - I, I didn't hear them come in. 256 00:12:08,900 --> 00:12:10,200 Did you hear them come in? 257 00:12:11,200 --> 00:12:12,483 Ted. 258 00:12:12,533 --> 00:12:14,100 Ted, I'm asking you a question. 259 00:12:15,834 --> 00:12:20,216 - I can't wait to pump her gas. 260 00:12:20,266 --> 00:12:21,533 - You're self-serve, Ted. 261 00:12:23,633 --> 00:12:25,717 (bell jingles) 262 00:12:25,767 --> 00:12:26,767 Weird, huh? 263 00:12:27,667 --> 00:12:28,667 Weren't they sort of 264 00:12:29,567 --> 00:12:31,166 unnaturally shiny? 265 00:12:32,066 --> 00:12:33,800 - Oh, I need some fresh air. 266 00:12:35,200 --> 00:12:39,283 (accordion music) 267 00:12:39,333 --> 00:12:41,050 - Remember, City Council meeting 268 00:12:41,100 --> 00:12:43,383 in the fish locker at six o'clock. 269 00:12:43,433 --> 00:12:45,717 (light orchestral music) 270 00:12:45,767 --> 00:12:48,617 - And further, Mister Mayor, 271 00:12:48,667 --> 00:12:50,983 I move for a no-growth ordinance 272 00:12:51,033 --> 00:12:53,350 until we discover just what the desecration 273 00:12:53,400 --> 00:12:55,617 of our water off of our coast will have. 274 00:12:55,667 --> 00:12:57,250 - Mr. Hutchenreuther, 275 00:12:57,300 --> 00:12:59,450 we have the most modern water treatment, 276 00:12:59,500 --> 00:13:01,283 the most stringent environmental controls 277 00:13:01,333 --> 00:13:03,583 on the offshore waters, as well as the harbor. 278 00:13:03,633 --> 00:13:05,016 Surely you know that-- 279 00:13:05,066 --> 00:13:08,283 - You have no idea what's going on out there! 280 00:13:08,333 --> 00:13:11,317 The new deviation, the monsters even now 281 00:13:11,367 --> 00:13:14,083 rallying to take us over. 282 00:13:14,133 --> 00:13:15,917 - Oh sir, Daneport. 283 00:13:15,967 --> 00:13:16,850 (laughing) 284 00:13:16,900 --> 00:13:18,617 - I move we wait and see. 285 00:13:18,667 --> 00:13:19,717 Seconded? 286 00:13:19,767 --> 00:13:20,717 - Seconded. 287 00:13:20,767 --> 00:13:21,983 (gavel banging) 288 00:13:22,033 --> 00:13:24,200 - Thank you Bancroft, you may sit down now. 289 00:13:25,066 --> 00:13:27,116 Any more business? 290 00:13:27,166 --> 00:13:29,884 (rock music) 291 00:13:29,934 --> 00:13:31,667 - A business license. 292 00:13:33,667 --> 00:13:35,784 - And who might you be? 293 00:13:35,834 --> 00:13:37,433 - Yvonne Wayne. 294 00:13:39,300 --> 00:13:41,550 I'm renovating the old Augusta house, 295 00:13:41,600 --> 00:13:44,283 and opening up a waxing salon. 296 00:13:44,333 --> 00:13:45,917 - Now just a second, little lady. 297 00:13:45,967 --> 00:13:48,150 You never said anything about wax. 298 00:13:48,200 --> 00:13:50,383 She never said anything about wax. 299 00:13:50,433 --> 00:13:52,583 Ted's Self-Serve is fully equipped 300 00:13:52,633 --> 00:13:53,684 with a full line of-- 301 00:13:53,734 --> 00:13:55,066 - Hair removal, Ted. 302 00:13:56,633 --> 00:13:58,050 - Hair removal. 303 00:13:58,100 --> 00:14:00,950 A salon to remove, I see. 304 00:14:01,000 --> 00:14:04,550 Well, Pilar could stand to lose some hair, I guess. 305 00:14:04,600 --> 00:14:05,433 - So could you. 306 00:14:06,567 --> 00:14:08,150 - I think it's unnatural. 307 00:14:08,200 --> 00:14:09,750 Bad for the complexion. 308 00:14:09,800 --> 00:14:12,216 Bad for the whole human machine. 309 00:14:12,266 --> 00:14:13,450 - Nothing like the wife did up to give 310 00:14:13,500 --> 00:14:15,650 the man incentive to come ashore, eh Pepe? 311 00:14:15,700 --> 00:14:16,617 (laughing) 312 00:14:16,667 --> 00:14:18,150 - Wait a minute. 313 00:14:18,200 --> 00:14:19,667 I have some questions. 314 00:14:21,200 --> 00:14:23,250 I'm a reporter, Miss Wayne. 315 00:14:23,300 --> 00:14:25,517 It's in my instincts. 316 00:14:25,567 --> 00:14:28,016 I know a few things. 317 00:14:28,066 --> 00:14:30,917 - How lucky for you. 318 00:14:30,967 --> 00:14:32,650 - How do we know these people are qualified. 319 00:14:32,700 --> 00:14:34,517 Don't you have to have a beautician's license 320 00:14:34,567 --> 00:14:35,950 from the state before you can go off 321 00:14:36,000 --> 00:14:38,950 opening up some hotsy-totsy wax salon? 322 00:14:39,000 --> 00:14:40,684 Just where is that, Miss Wayne? 323 00:14:40,734 --> 00:14:41,617 Hmm? 324 00:14:41,667 --> 00:14:43,850 - Well, certainly, Mr. Miller. 325 00:14:43,900 --> 00:14:46,583 I have all the appropriate paperwork. 326 00:14:46,633 --> 00:14:48,200 Would you care to see it? 327 00:14:53,367 --> 00:14:55,700 - License, license, license. 328 00:14:57,734 --> 00:14:58,550 - License. 329 00:14:58,600 --> 00:14:59,583 - License. 330 00:14:59,633 --> 00:15:00,450 - License. 331 00:15:00,500 --> 00:15:01,250 - License. 332 00:15:01,300 --> 00:15:02,083 - License. 333 00:15:02,133 --> 00:15:02,917 - Wait a minute. 334 00:15:02,967 --> 00:15:04,583 - Majority rules, Karen. 335 00:15:04,633 --> 00:15:05,417 Seconded? 336 00:15:05,467 --> 00:15:06,250 - Seconded. 337 00:15:06,300 --> 00:15:07,183 - Second, sec, call it. 338 00:15:07,233 --> 00:15:09,617 - Seconded, meeting adjourned. 339 00:15:09,667 --> 00:15:12,433 (all chattering) 340 00:15:15,166 --> 00:15:16,750 (light orchestral music) 341 00:15:16,800 --> 00:15:17,684 - Captains. 342 00:15:17,734 --> 00:15:19,116 - Yeah? 343 00:15:19,166 --> 00:15:22,250 - What was it you were saying about an evil wind? 344 00:15:22,300 --> 00:15:24,650 - The evil wind is one that'll turn you in you 345 00:15:24,700 --> 00:15:28,550 any minute and make your hair stand on end. 346 00:15:28,600 --> 00:15:29,817 - It'll shiver your timbers, 347 00:15:29,867 --> 00:15:31,850 furl the tops'l and keelhaul the bosun. 348 00:15:31,900 --> 00:15:33,983 - An evil wind will put the mizzen 349 00:15:34,033 --> 00:15:36,433 in the fraggin' in as long as it takes to blink. 350 00:15:37,700 --> 00:15:38,750 - Oh. 351 00:15:38,800 --> 00:15:40,250 That makes sense. 352 00:15:40,300 --> 00:15:41,133 Thanks. 353 00:15:42,667 --> 00:15:45,617 Um, captains, I know I shouldn't ask this, 354 00:15:45,667 --> 00:15:47,283 but what are you whittling? 355 00:15:47,333 --> 00:15:48,116 - Yew. 356 00:15:48,166 --> 00:15:48,950 - Me. 357 00:15:49,000 --> 00:15:50,150 - No, yew. 358 00:15:50,200 --> 00:15:51,050 - I? 359 00:15:51,100 --> 00:15:51,934 - Aye. 360 00:15:53,100 --> 00:15:54,950 - Oh, yew. 361 00:15:55,000 --> 00:15:55,950 Y-E-W, the tree. 362 00:15:56,000 --> 00:15:57,717 - Aye, yew. 363 00:15:57,767 --> 00:16:00,216 - Oh, I was reading an article about the Pacific yew 364 00:16:00,266 --> 00:16:02,617 just the other day, it has all sorts of curative powers 365 00:16:02,667 --> 00:16:04,350 like asthma, cancer, you name it. 366 00:16:04,400 --> 00:16:06,950 - Aye, and it'll take the barnacles off your stem. 367 00:16:07,000 --> 00:16:08,517 - And the woodworm off your stern. 368 00:16:08,567 --> 00:16:09,550 Like to smoke it. 369 00:16:09,600 --> 00:16:11,483 - I like mine with milk. 370 00:16:11,533 --> 00:16:13,650 - Give her a try. 371 00:16:13,700 --> 00:16:15,400 - Never know when you might need it. 372 00:16:17,600 --> 00:16:20,450 - Think we confused her with all this nautical talk? 373 00:16:20,500 --> 00:16:22,183 - I suppose so. 374 00:16:22,233 --> 00:16:25,050 Reckon that's what it's all about, being an old salt. 375 00:16:25,100 --> 00:16:27,517 - Old tar, properly it's an old tar. 376 00:16:27,567 --> 00:16:29,383 - I know what I am, Zebediah, you old fool. 377 00:16:29,433 --> 00:16:31,116 (grunting) 378 00:16:31,166 --> 00:16:34,166 (tense synth music) 379 00:16:52,166 --> 00:16:54,850 - I've been expecting you, Mr. Miller. 380 00:16:54,900 --> 00:16:57,684 - How did you get this place fixed up so fast? 381 00:16:57,734 --> 00:17:01,116 - I know my subcontractors like the back of my 382 00:17:01,166 --> 00:17:02,917 brassiere cup. 383 00:17:02,967 --> 00:17:06,550 - Like the back of your, your br, 384 00:17:06,600 --> 00:17:07,483 hold on. 385 00:17:07,533 --> 00:17:10,550 I want to talk to you about your 386 00:17:10,600 --> 00:17:13,717 business, because frankly, this kind of establishment 387 00:17:13,767 --> 00:17:16,617 is something we in Daneport associate with fruits, 388 00:17:16,667 --> 00:17:19,317 and Europeans, and we don't, 389 00:17:19,367 --> 00:17:21,800 don't have that sort 390 00:17:22,700 --> 00:17:24,250 around here. 391 00:17:24,300 --> 00:17:26,350 - Not at all, Mr. Miller. 392 00:17:26,400 --> 00:17:28,000 You've got it all wrong. 393 00:17:29,734 --> 00:17:30,967 Let me show you. 394 00:17:33,367 --> 00:17:35,784 - So, I told Jane, I said, so what if he's 395 00:17:35,834 --> 00:17:37,617 15 years younger than she is. 396 00:17:37,667 --> 00:17:39,983 If he makes her happy, that's what counts. 397 00:17:40,033 --> 00:17:41,417 - Well, so long as the kid's parents 398 00:17:41,467 --> 00:17:43,517 and the police don't find out. 399 00:17:43,567 --> 00:17:45,016 So what are you doing this afternoon? 400 00:17:45,066 --> 00:17:47,050 - Ooh, I thought I'd try that new salon. 401 00:17:47,100 --> 00:17:48,317 Maybe get myself done. 402 00:17:48,367 --> 00:17:51,450 Who knows, maybe some 17-year-old stud 403 00:17:51,500 --> 00:17:52,884 will get the hots for me. 404 00:17:52,934 --> 00:17:56,684 - (laughs) Mom, you and some young thing. 405 00:17:56,734 --> 00:17:58,684 Let me know how it goes, okay? 406 00:17:58,734 --> 00:18:00,450 - With the salon or the stud? 407 00:18:00,500 --> 00:18:02,617 - The salon. 408 00:18:02,667 --> 00:18:05,617 You know, I met that Yvonne Wayne the other day. 409 00:18:05,667 --> 00:18:07,784 She seemed a little weird. 410 00:18:07,834 --> 00:18:10,417 - Oh, weird like Bancroft Hutchenreuter weird, 411 00:18:10,467 --> 00:18:12,183 or weird like body snatchers? 412 00:18:12,233 --> 00:18:14,650 - Well, just don't let them turn you into 413 00:18:14,700 --> 00:18:16,317 a sex maniac or anything, okay? 414 00:18:16,367 --> 00:18:18,684 - Oh, and I thought it was the widows like me 415 00:18:18,734 --> 00:18:20,500 who were supposed to be the prudes. 416 00:18:23,834 --> 00:18:26,983 - I don't know, it just seems a little whacko. 417 00:18:27,033 --> 00:18:28,317 - Afraid of the competition, are you? 418 00:18:28,367 --> 00:18:29,884 - We don't do legs. 419 00:18:29,934 --> 00:18:31,517 - Then what's the beef? 420 00:18:31,567 --> 00:18:33,050 - Well, I don't get it. 421 00:18:33,100 --> 00:18:35,850 I mean, why bring this kind of business to Daneport? 422 00:18:35,900 --> 00:18:38,834 People in big cities and Europe get that kind of treatment. 423 00:18:40,033 --> 00:18:41,417 Holy shit. 424 00:18:41,467 --> 00:18:42,300 - What? 425 00:18:44,967 --> 00:18:47,116 - W-Wayne's D-dip-i-di-di-- 426 00:18:47,166 --> 00:18:47,950 - Depilation. 427 00:18:48,000 --> 00:18:48,784 - Right. - Yeah. 428 00:18:48,834 --> 00:18:50,083 A full page ad? 429 00:18:50,133 --> 00:18:51,550 What's gotten into Frank, anyway? 430 00:18:51,600 --> 00:18:52,550 He's never taken out a full page ad in his life. 431 00:18:52,600 --> 00:18:54,150 - Where is he, anyway? 432 00:18:54,200 --> 00:18:55,367 Has anyone seen him? 433 00:18:57,533 --> 00:19:00,483 Wayne's Waxing Salon announces its opening giveaway, 434 00:19:00,533 --> 00:19:02,750 one free body wax with this ad. 435 00:19:02,800 --> 00:19:05,383 Do away with pesky body hair for six months. 436 00:19:05,433 --> 00:19:06,617 (sighing) 437 00:19:06,667 --> 00:19:08,467 Be more attractive to the opposite sex. 438 00:19:10,800 --> 00:19:12,183 Swim faster. 439 00:19:12,233 --> 00:19:14,750 Experience love making as it should be. 440 00:19:14,800 --> 00:19:15,834 Smooth and hairless. 441 00:19:17,033 --> 00:19:18,684 - Then what's the beef? 442 00:19:18,734 --> 00:19:20,100 - It's good for six months. 443 00:19:22,066 --> 00:19:23,417 I mean, if it's good for six months, 444 00:19:23,467 --> 00:19:25,583 how can they stay in business? 445 00:19:25,633 --> 00:19:26,934 - Wait for the tuna fleet? 446 00:19:28,800 --> 00:19:30,200 - Or an outbreak of puberty. 447 00:19:36,967 --> 00:19:38,450 Thinking about getting a wax done, Matt? 448 00:19:38,500 --> 00:19:39,283 - Me? 449 00:19:39,333 --> 00:19:40,250 Never. 450 00:19:40,300 --> 00:19:41,700 Car, maybe. 451 00:19:44,400 --> 00:19:46,800 (rock music) 452 00:19:49,166 --> 00:19:51,417 - Oh, oh, this is lovely. 453 00:19:51,467 --> 00:19:53,800 (chuckling) 454 00:19:56,800 --> 00:19:59,233 (bell tolls) 455 00:20:06,834 --> 00:20:07,717 - See? 456 00:20:07,767 --> 00:20:09,183 Told you it wasn't haunted. 457 00:20:09,233 --> 00:20:12,250 - But my Uncle Hernando said it was a place of evil. 458 00:20:12,300 --> 00:20:15,050 - Well, your Uncle Hernando's been at sea too long. 459 00:20:15,100 --> 00:20:16,250 (needle scratching) 460 00:20:16,300 --> 00:20:18,967 (woman screams) 461 00:20:22,834 --> 00:20:24,183 - I love-- (gasping) 462 00:20:24,233 --> 00:20:25,116 - Frank. 463 00:20:25,166 --> 00:20:27,166 - The feel of silk on bare skin. 464 00:20:28,700 --> 00:20:29,650 - You do? 465 00:20:29,700 --> 00:20:32,750 - Got any silk jock socks? 466 00:20:32,800 --> 00:20:34,266 - Uh, jock? 467 00:20:35,300 --> 00:20:36,333 - Something roomy. 468 00:20:37,600 --> 00:20:38,884 - Roomy. 469 00:20:38,934 --> 00:20:42,100 Like a studio, or like a mansion? 470 00:20:44,333 --> 00:20:45,183 That was a joke. 471 00:20:45,233 --> 00:20:46,684 Um. 472 00:20:46,734 --> 00:20:51,600 No, no, uh no jock, silk or otherwise, none. 473 00:20:54,200 --> 00:20:56,050 I hardly even recognized him. 474 00:20:56,100 --> 00:20:58,917 He looked like a wax apple having a bad hair day. 475 00:20:58,967 --> 00:21:02,817 - He has undergone rejuvenation at the hot wax palace. 476 00:21:02,867 --> 00:21:04,016 - Well, what all did they do to him? 477 00:21:04,066 --> 00:21:05,850 - Made him a man. 478 00:21:05,900 --> 00:21:06,950 - Really? 479 00:21:07,000 --> 00:21:09,950 Ew (laughs). 480 00:21:10,000 --> 00:21:11,417 Well, you went there. 481 00:21:11,467 --> 00:21:12,550 What was it like? 482 00:21:12,600 --> 00:21:14,850 (Mom chuckles) 483 00:21:14,900 --> 00:21:16,617 Mom? 484 00:21:16,667 --> 00:21:18,617 Mom, are you okay? 485 00:21:18,667 --> 00:21:20,450 The salon. 486 00:21:20,500 --> 00:21:21,817 What was it like? 487 00:21:21,867 --> 00:21:22,917 - Why do you ask? 488 00:21:22,967 --> 00:21:23,750 - Oh, come on. 489 00:21:23,800 --> 00:21:25,116 A salon in Daneport. 490 00:21:25,166 --> 00:21:27,483 A place like that reminds me of 491 00:21:27,533 --> 00:21:29,717 a beauty parlor for dogs. 492 00:21:29,767 --> 00:21:31,717 You take in a shaggy mutt, you come out with 493 00:21:31,767 --> 00:21:33,216 a clipped pooch with a bow on its hip 494 00:21:33,266 --> 00:21:35,817 and one on its head smelling like a French whore house. 495 00:21:35,867 --> 00:21:37,283 And what all did they do to you? 496 00:21:37,333 --> 00:21:40,000 Did they do the whole like body massage and makeup deal? 497 00:21:42,767 --> 00:21:47,083 - They get rid of all that pesky body hair. 498 00:21:47,133 --> 00:21:50,100 It was the most liberating experience of my life. 499 00:21:51,133 --> 00:21:52,367 God, I need a man! 500 00:21:53,300 --> 00:21:54,517 - Ain't that the truth. 501 00:21:54,567 --> 00:21:55,750 Got tons of stuff that needs to be 502 00:21:55,800 --> 00:21:57,884 taken care of around here, and Mick, 503 00:21:57,934 --> 00:22:00,850 getting him to help out is next to impossible. 504 00:22:00,900 --> 00:22:02,950 (Mom screams) 505 00:22:03,000 --> 00:22:03,850 What? 506 00:22:03,900 --> 00:22:05,417 - All that hair! 507 00:22:05,467 --> 00:22:07,350 Why don't you do something? 508 00:22:07,400 --> 00:22:08,750 - I'm shaving it. 509 00:22:08,800 --> 00:22:10,617 - That's not enough! 510 00:22:10,667 --> 00:22:12,767 (crying) 511 00:22:15,000 --> 00:22:15,834 - Mom? 512 00:22:17,000 --> 00:22:18,317 Mom! 513 00:22:18,367 --> 00:22:19,450 (orchestral music hit) 514 00:22:19,500 --> 00:22:22,517 (knife chopping) 515 00:22:22,567 --> 00:22:24,450 - Yeah, you're pretty handy with that knife. 516 00:22:24,500 --> 00:22:25,383 - Amazing. 517 00:22:25,433 --> 00:22:26,317 - It is my profession, you know. 518 00:22:26,367 --> 00:22:27,300 Being amazing. 519 00:22:31,767 --> 00:22:33,183 - Hey babe. 520 00:22:33,233 --> 00:22:34,750 You okay? 521 00:22:34,800 --> 00:22:35,583 - Babe. 522 00:22:35,633 --> 00:22:38,133 (jazzy music) 523 00:22:55,367 --> 00:22:56,817 - Man, that's gotta hurt. 524 00:22:56,867 --> 00:22:58,700 - Not if you know what you're doing. 525 00:23:00,266 --> 00:23:02,400 (screams) 526 00:23:09,967 --> 00:23:11,100 What's the matter? 527 00:23:12,467 --> 00:23:14,417 - My mother. 528 00:23:14,467 --> 00:23:16,717 She went into that new salon today, 529 00:23:16,767 --> 00:23:17,917 and they must have I don't know 530 00:23:17,967 --> 00:23:20,283 given her weird pills or something. 531 00:23:20,333 --> 00:23:23,083 - It takes women days to adjust to a new do. 532 00:23:23,133 --> 00:23:24,583 - Oh, okay, Micky. 533 00:23:24,633 --> 00:23:26,934 Well, how does that explain Frank Miller, huh? 534 00:23:27,967 --> 00:23:29,166 He's gone weird too. 535 00:23:32,300 --> 00:23:33,550 - Let's eat. 536 00:23:33,600 --> 00:23:34,600 - All right. 537 00:23:38,367 --> 00:23:41,200 (soft rock music) 538 00:24:06,467 --> 00:24:08,884 - Okay, so one, two, three, four, there. 539 00:24:08,934 --> 00:24:09,983 - My turn? 540 00:24:10,033 --> 00:24:10,917 - Yeah, it's your turn. 541 00:24:10,967 --> 00:24:12,383 - (laughs) Double purple. 542 00:24:12,433 --> 00:24:13,417 - You've been getting lucky all night. 543 00:24:13,467 --> 00:24:14,300 - I'm just good. 544 00:24:16,200 --> 00:24:19,300 (clattering outside) 545 00:24:20,400 --> 00:24:21,216 - No Mick, you're over here. 546 00:24:21,266 --> 00:24:22,150 - No, I'm right there. 547 00:24:22,200 --> 00:24:22,950 - Mick, you're over here. 548 00:24:23,000 --> 00:24:24,050 No, you're over here. 549 00:24:24,100 --> 00:24:24,983 - All right, you're right. 550 00:24:25,033 --> 00:24:27,750 (loud clattering outside) 551 00:24:27,800 --> 00:24:28,917 Raccoons? 552 00:24:28,967 --> 00:24:29,750 - Who knows. 553 00:24:29,800 --> 00:24:30,633 Come on. 554 00:24:33,166 --> 00:24:34,066 - You guys. 555 00:24:35,100 --> 00:24:35,934 Guys! 556 00:24:37,200 --> 00:24:42,133 (door clicking) (sighing) 557 00:24:46,533 --> 00:24:49,033 (tense music) 558 00:24:53,867 --> 00:24:56,133 (grunting) 559 00:24:59,033 --> 00:24:59,917 - Fore! 560 00:24:59,967 --> 00:25:03,367 (upbeat orchestral music) 561 00:25:06,767 --> 00:25:07,550 (needle scratching) 562 00:25:07,600 --> 00:25:10,100 (tense music) 563 00:25:11,567 --> 00:25:14,500 (thunder crashing) 564 00:25:24,633 --> 00:25:27,417 (both yelling) 565 00:25:27,467 --> 00:25:30,083 - You must die, you must die. 566 00:25:30,133 --> 00:25:32,800 Bastard, burn the bastard, burn. 567 00:25:34,333 --> 00:25:36,250 - Gosh, can't we all just like get alone. 568 00:25:36,300 --> 00:25:37,950 - I think somebody doesn't like us. 569 00:25:38,000 --> 00:25:38,950 (all yell) 570 00:25:39,000 --> 00:25:40,083 - Jesus, Sharon. 571 00:25:40,133 --> 00:25:41,283 - What the hell is that? 572 00:25:41,333 --> 00:25:42,433 Now that's scary. 573 00:25:43,400 --> 00:25:44,917 - High tech raccoons. 574 00:25:44,967 --> 00:25:46,283 - Elaborate practical joke. 575 00:25:46,333 --> 00:25:47,517 - Hanged in effigy? 576 00:25:47,567 --> 00:25:50,483 You must have really botched a flattop. 577 00:25:50,533 --> 00:25:53,250 - Well, I say we put our gallows friend to bed. 578 00:25:53,300 --> 00:25:54,216 - Yeah. 579 00:25:54,266 --> 00:25:55,483 - You must die. 580 00:25:55,533 --> 00:25:58,583 Bastard, burn the bastard, burn him. 581 00:25:58,633 --> 00:26:00,150 You must die. 582 00:26:00,200 --> 00:26:03,083 You must die, bastard. 583 00:26:03,133 --> 00:26:07,684 (thunder crashing) (ominous music) 584 00:26:07,734 --> 00:26:10,400 (Yvonne laughs) 585 00:26:25,767 --> 00:26:30,000 - And you won't forget to wax my throttle. 586 00:26:31,900 --> 00:26:37,617 (thunder crashing) (acoustic rock music) 587 00:26:37,667 --> 00:26:38,550 ♪ Only for daybreak 588 00:26:38,600 --> 00:26:40,250 ♪ Can't catch me 589 00:26:40,300 --> 00:26:42,150 ♪ If I can only see 590 00:26:42,200 --> 00:26:44,250 ♪ What I you and I would need 591 00:26:44,300 --> 00:26:46,050 ♪ Sorry if it hurts 592 00:26:46,100 --> 00:26:51,950 ♪ Well, maybe I'll stay at home ♪ 593 00:26:52,000 --> 00:26:53,216 ♪ Oh, now the word is out. 594 00:26:53,266 --> 00:26:54,750 - Mmm. 595 00:26:54,800 --> 00:26:57,717 Try telling me again it was kids who did that. 596 00:26:57,767 --> 00:26:59,283 - Come on. 597 00:26:59,333 --> 00:27:00,917 Who doesn't like barbers? 598 00:27:00,967 --> 00:27:04,417 - Someone with a gruesome sense of humor. 599 00:27:04,467 --> 00:27:06,767 - Somehow, this doesn't seem like the time or the place. 600 00:27:08,033 --> 00:27:09,533 - Is that all you think about? 601 00:27:11,133 --> 00:27:11,967 - Yeah. 602 00:27:12,967 --> 00:27:14,784 (grunting) 603 00:27:14,834 --> 00:27:15,617 (ominous music) 604 00:27:15,667 --> 00:27:17,083 - What's going on? 605 00:27:17,133 --> 00:27:20,367 - This one desperately needs to be waxed (laughs). 606 00:27:22,000 --> 00:27:23,717 - And eight times a week just isn't enough. 607 00:27:23,767 --> 00:27:26,550 You know what my doctor said. 608 00:27:26,600 --> 00:27:29,283 - So it's more therapeutic for you to have sex 609 00:27:29,333 --> 00:27:31,183 than it is to make love with your girlfriend. 610 00:27:31,233 --> 00:27:32,650 - It's science. 611 00:27:32,700 --> 00:27:35,717 Besides, you always love it when I-- 612 00:27:35,767 --> 00:27:36,600 - Mmm. 613 00:27:37,800 --> 00:27:38,884 - Watch it. 614 00:27:38,934 --> 00:27:39,817 Come. 615 00:27:39,867 --> 00:27:40,850 - Pesky body hair. 616 00:27:40,900 --> 00:27:41,717 - Watch it. 617 00:27:41,767 --> 00:27:42,550 (slapping) 618 00:27:42,600 --> 00:27:43,750 - Ow. 619 00:27:43,800 --> 00:27:46,650 - City Council official business. 620 00:27:46,700 --> 00:27:49,133 (Mick sighs) 621 00:27:51,400 --> 00:27:54,400 (needle scratching) 622 00:27:55,266 --> 00:27:58,100 (water splashing) 623 00:28:00,266 --> 00:28:02,967 (birds chirping) 624 00:28:23,133 --> 00:28:26,133 (tense synth music) 625 00:29:09,033 --> 00:29:12,367 (man and woman moaning) 626 00:29:28,333 --> 00:29:32,500 - How nice to see you, Miss Councilwoman. 627 00:29:34,467 --> 00:29:35,917 - Business keeps going on like this, 628 00:29:35,967 --> 00:29:37,750 you'll have to open branches. 629 00:29:37,800 --> 00:29:39,633 - We're thinking, website. 630 00:29:41,934 --> 00:29:44,950 (woman screams) 631 00:29:45,000 --> 00:29:47,550 Some take the removal better than others. 632 00:29:47,600 --> 00:29:50,100 (tense music) 633 00:29:54,700 --> 00:29:56,667 - How unusual, it's so warm. 634 00:29:59,633 --> 00:30:03,650 - This is where we mix the wax with the other 635 00:30:03,700 --> 00:30:06,383 ingredients to remove all traces of 636 00:30:06,433 --> 00:30:08,367 pesky body hair. 637 00:30:11,433 --> 00:30:15,417 Yes, there is a special chemical 638 00:30:15,467 --> 00:30:17,400 to soften the skin 639 00:30:18,967 --> 00:30:20,900 and some say it affects the mind. 640 00:30:22,367 --> 00:30:25,750 - It does? 641 00:30:25,800 --> 00:30:30,100 - It frees you from the distraction of pesky body hair. 642 00:30:31,066 --> 00:30:35,016 - It does? 643 00:30:35,066 --> 00:30:37,917 - Depilation sets one free from all the 644 00:30:37,967 --> 00:30:42,934 unpleasant emotions that we associate with hair. 645 00:30:43,700 --> 00:30:46,717 - It does? 646 00:30:46,767 --> 00:30:51,216 - The ecstasy of being without pesky body hair 647 00:30:51,266 --> 00:30:54,433 is truly orgasmic. 648 00:30:55,767 --> 00:30:58,317 - It is. 649 00:30:58,367 --> 00:31:01,784 - Beyond your wildest imagination. 650 00:31:01,834 --> 00:31:05,583 It just keeps going and going and going and going, 651 00:31:05,633 --> 00:31:08,283 your libido goes wild! 652 00:31:08,333 --> 00:31:09,917 Taking you to places that you 653 00:31:09,967 --> 00:31:13,083 never even dared to dream about. 654 00:31:13,133 --> 00:31:14,950 (laughing) 655 00:31:15,000 --> 00:31:15,784 (rock music) 656 00:31:15,834 --> 00:31:17,600 ♪ Ow 657 00:31:25,900 --> 00:31:27,917 ♪ We used to be, oh 658 00:31:27,967 --> 00:31:30,450 ♪ Superstar girl 659 00:31:30,500 --> 00:31:32,800 - Places we've never dreamed about? 660 00:31:34,333 --> 00:31:35,583 Like Orlando? 661 00:31:35,633 --> 00:31:37,383 (man yells) 662 00:31:37,433 --> 00:31:39,216 (woman sighs) 663 00:31:39,266 --> 00:31:40,717 (man yells) 664 00:31:40,767 --> 00:31:42,684 (woman screams) 665 00:31:42,734 --> 00:31:44,050 (Yvonne laughs) 666 00:31:44,100 --> 00:31:47,150 ♪ She's so crazy 667 00:31:47,200 --> 00:31:48,617 ♪ The girl's gone crazy 668 00:31:48,667 --> 00:31:50,517 ♪ She's so crazy 669 00:31:50,567 --> 00:31:53,283 (moaning) (laughing) 670 00:31:53,333 --> 00:31:55,150 ♪ Any time, any place 671 00:31:55,200 --> 00:31:57,917 ♪ She's got such peculiar taste ♪ 672 00:31:57,967 --> 00:32:00,700 ♪ She's so crazy 673 00:32:02,233 --> 00:32:03,583 (needle scratching) 674 00:32:03,633 --> 00:32:06,116 - I thought you guys all go to sleep afterwards. 675 00:32:06,166 --> 00:32:07,050 - Not me. 676 00:32:07,100 --> 00:32:08,083 You ready for the next round? 677 00:32:08,133 --> 00:32:09,800 - As soon as you are. 678 00:32:12,066 --> 00:32:13,367 What's that smell? 679 00:32:15,000 --> 00:32:16,083 - While you were in the bathroom I 680 00:32:16,133 --> 00:32:17,483 started heating something. 681 00:32:17,533 --> 00:32:19,917 - Oh yeah, like what? 682 00:32:19,967 --> 00:32:22,016 - It's going to make it so good for you. 683 00:32:22,066 --> 00:32:23,950 You're never going to believe it could be so good. 684 00:32:24,000 --> 00:32:25,200 - Oh, yes I will. 685 00:32:26,834 --> 00:32:28,317 - Do you trust me? 686 00:32:28,367 --> 00:32:31,550 - I just fucked you for three hours. 687 00:32:31,600 --> 00:32:33,367 - Then I really have something for you. 688 00:32:34,967 --> 00:32:37,717 (chiming music) 689 00:32:37,767 --> 00:32:40,033 - What are you going to do? 690 00:32:41,500 --> 00:32:44,884 - Gonna rid you of that pesky body hair. 691 00:32:44,934 --> 00:32:45,767 - Cool! 692 00:32:48,233 --> 00:32:49,066 Oh. 693 00:32:50,967 --> 00:32:54,183 Oh, don't stop now, I feel lonely and neglected. 694 00:32:54,233 --> 00:32:55,600 - Have to wait til it dries. 695 00:32:57,567 --> 00:32:58,784 - Then hand me my cigarette, please, 696 00:32:58,834 --> 00:33:01,517 I might as well have something in my mouth. 697 00:33:01,567 --> 00:33:02,350 (gavel pounding) 698 00:33:02,400 --> 00:33:03,483 (light synth music) 699 00:33:03,533 --> 00:33:05,216 - Any business? 700 00:33:05,266 --> 00:33:06,367 - No. 701 00:33:07,800 --> 00:33:08,800 - Adjourned. 702 00:33:15,934 --> 00:33:17,383 - Hurry up, Frank. 703 00:33:17,433 --> 00:33:19,083 I need to get laid. 704 00:33:19,133 --> 00:33:21,367 (groaning) 705 00:33:22,433 --> 00:33:23,650 (pop music) 706 00:33:23,700 --> 00:33:24,784 ♪ Work that body, work that body ♪ 707 00:33:24,834 --> 00:33:27,083 (man and woman groaning) 708 00:33:27,133 --> 00:33:29,216 ♪ Work that body, work that body ♪ 709 00:33:29,266 --> 00:33:31,483 ♪ Make sure you don't hurt nobody ♪ 710 00:33:31,533 --> 00:33:34,183 (man and woman groaning) 711 00:33:34,233 --> 00:33:36,050 ♪ Make you don't hurt nobody 712 00:33:36,100 --> 00:33:40,884 ♪ Work that body, work that body ♪ 713 00:33:40,934 --> 00:33:42,583 ♪ Everybody 714 00:33:42,633 --> 00:33:44,550 - Faster, faster. 715 00:33:44,600 --> 00:33:45,834 Faster, faster. 716 00:33:51,100 --> 00:33:52,450 Faster. 717 00:33:52,500 --> 00:33:53,333 Faster. 718 00:33:54,900 --> 00:33:57,166 - You've got to be kidding. 719 00:33:58,800 --> 00:34:01,150 ♪ Get on the floor and get up 720 00:34:01,200 --> 00:34:03,083 - Welcome to Yvonne's website. 721 00:34:03,133 --> 00:34:05,684 Please enter password. 722 00:34:05,734 --> 00:34:07,250 - Depilation. 723 00:34:07,300 --> 00:34:10,417 (keyboard clacking) 724 00:34:10,467 --> 00:34:11,867 Access denied. 725 00:34:13,066 --> 00:34:13,900 - Hmm. 726 00:34:15,300 --> 00:34:16,183 Horny. 727 00:34:16,233 --> 00:34:18,583 (keyboard clacking) 728 00:34:18,633 --> 00:34:20,050 - Access denied. 729 00:34:20,100 --> 00:34:21,150 - Dammit. 730 00:34:21,200 --> 00:34:23,867 (Yvonne laughs) 731 00:34:25,934 --> 00:34:27,617 You look like you had a hard night. 732 00:34:27,667 --> 00:34:28,867 - The best. 733 00:34:30,133 --> 00:34:32,050 - You look like sunburned or something. 734 00:34:32,100 --> 00:34:34,000 - Oh, I feel terrific. 735 00:34:34,934 --> 00:34:36,867 - Access denied. 736 00:34:39,500 --> 00:34:42,150 - I made love all night. 737 00:34:42,200 --> 00:34:43,734 - Isn't that normal for you? 738 00:34:45,000 --> 00:34:47,700 - Come to think of it, yes, it is. 739 00:34:50,700 --> 00:34:53,133 (rock music) 740 00:35:06,033 --> 00:35:09,350 ♪ You, the eyes of the world 741 00:35:09,400 --> 00:35:12,817 ♪ Tell us how long it will take ♪ 742 00:35:12,867 --> 00:35:16,383 ♪ We're onto you 743 00:35:16,433 --> 00:35:20,583 ♪ We're onto you 744 00:35:20,633 --> 00:35:24,216 ♪ You, the voice of the world 745 00:35:24,266 --> 00:35:26,383 ♪ Tell us what you need to say 746 00:35:26,433 --> 00:35:27,617 (needle scratching) 747 00:35:27,667 --> 00:35:32,333 ("La Bamba") (singing in foreign language) 748 00:35:35,767 --> 00:35:39,283 - Scratch sleepy cost town, put catatonic. 749 00:35:39,333 --> 00:35:41,450 - It's like the whole town's turn into, 750 00:35:41,500 --> 00:35:44,650 I don't know, zombies. 751 00:35:44,700 --> 00:35:46,183 Vampires. 752 00:35:46,233 --> 00:35:47,850 Walking dead. 753 00:35:47,900 --> 00:35:49,750 Republicans. 754 00:35:49,800 --> 00:35:52,216 Ever since they came to town. 755 00:35:52,266 --> 00:35:53,717 That's a strange group of bikers. 756 00:35:53,767 --> 00:35:56,200 (rock music) 757 00:35:59,233 --> 00:36:02,350 Ooh, I like my nasty body hair. 758 00:36:02,400 --> 00:36:04,800 (rock music) 759 00:36:17,867 --> 00:36:18,700 - Pesky 760 00:36:19,700 --> 00:36:20,533 body hair. 761 00:36:23,000 --> 00:36:23,983 What's that? 762 00:36:24,033 --> 00:36:25,050 - Yew. - Me? 763 00:36:25,100 --> 00:36:26,317 - Who? - What? 764 00:36:26,367 --> 00:36:27,517 - It's something the captains gave me. 765 00:36:27,567 --> 00:36:28,884 That was a hit. 766 00:36:28,934 --> 00:36:30,750 I will now play another hit, 767 00:36:30,800 --> 00:36:32,317 though I don't know why anyone listens 768 00:36:32,367 --> 00:36:33,433 to this mierda. 769 00:36:34,567 --> 00:36:36,650 - Something stinks in this town. 770 00:36:36,700 --> 00:36:38,583 - That's the paper mill in Eureka. 771 00:36:38,633 --> 00:36:40,083 (farting) 772 00:36:40,133 --> 00:36:41,283 - I myself am free of such trivialities. 773 00:36:41,333 --> 00:36:43,450 All I need now are some compliant nubile 774 00:36:43,500 --> 00:36:46,116 hairless 18-year-old girls to make my life complete. 775 00:36:46,166 --> 00:36:47,417 (singing in foreign language) 776 00:36:47,467 --> 00:36:48,400 - Don't we all. 777 00:36:50,600 --> 00:36:52,066 Did he just say mierda, mara. 778 00:36:55,233 --> 00:36:56,850 - You won't go near that salon. 779 00:36:56,900 --> 00:36:57,684 Promise. 780 00:36:57,734 --> 00:36:59,550 - Oh (scoffs) no. 781 00:36:59,600 --> 00:37:01,583 - I'm not worried about Sven. 782 00:37:01,633 --> 00:37:03,450 I know he won't do anything foolish. 783 00:37:03,500 --> 00:37:04,617 - Coward that I am. 784 00:37:04,667 --> 00:37:05,750 - But you. 785 00:37:05,800 --> 00:37:07,684 - Hair is my life. 786 00:37:07,734 --> 00:37:08,700 - Keep it that way. 787 00:37:11,834 --> 00:37:12,884 (heavy metal music) 788 00:37:12,934 --> 00:37:17,934 ♪ I got it, I got it 789 00:37:22,934 --> 00:37:24,650 ♪ I got no hair 790 00:37:24,700 --> 00:37:26,283 ♪ Under this hat 791 00:37:26,333 --> 00:37:28,183 ♪ And it trace south 792 00:37:28,233 --> 00:37:30,050 ♪ Down my back 793 00:37:30,100 --> 00:37:32,450 ♪ But I've got to slip away 794 00:37:32,500 --> 00:37:34,083 ♪ Slip away 795 00:37:34,133 --> 00:37:36,016 ♪ I've got to slip away 796 00:37:36,066 --> 00:37:41,066 ♪ From you, baby 797 00:37:42,400 --> 00:37:43,817 ♪ I've gotta go 798 00:37:43,867 --> 00:37:48,784 ♪ You've gotta go 799 00:37:48,834 --> 00:37:52,183 ♪ Ah, and the sun will rise 800 00:37:52,233 --> 00:37:54,016 - More wax, Talbot. 801 00:37:54,066 --> 00:37:57,317 - I'm stirring the hot tub as fast as I can! 802 00:37:57,367 --> 00:38:00,583 - You are stirring the vat! 803 00:38:00,633 --> 00:38:03,967 - You're stirring the cauldron. 804 00:38:09,533 --> 00:38:11,867 ♪ Slip away 805 00:38:24,066 --> 00:38:24,850 (cat meows) 806 00:38:24,900 --> 00:38:27,684 (thunder crashing) 807 00:38:27,734 --> 00:38:30,684 ♪ Up a tree 808 00:38:30,734 --> 00:38:33,950 ♪ You won't follow me 809 00:38:34,000 --> 00:38:35,817 - That is all for today. 810 00:38:35,867 --> 00:38:39,784 We will be back tomorrow at this time with a new load. 811 00:38:39,834 --> 00:38:42,133 See you then, and have a nice day. 812 00:38:43,133 --> 00:38:45,467 ♪ Slip away 813 00:38:46,633 --> 00:38:48,250 - Busy? 814 00:38:48,300 --> 00:38:49,133 - Mmm. 815 00:38:50,700 --> 00:38:53,383 - Ain't seen nothing like this since ought six. 816 00:38:53,433 --> 00:38:56,000 (man growling) 817 00:38:58,734 --> 00:39:01,400 (van squeaking) 818 00:39:05,300 --> 00:39:06,483 - Ah. 819 00:39:06,533 --> 00:39:07,717 - What is, what do you want here? 820 00:39:07,767 --> 00:39:08,817 - This won't hurt a bit, handsome. 821 00:39:08,867 --> 00:39:10,283 - Get out of here, woman. 822 00:39:10,333 --> 00:39:13,250 - Then you'll be all ours, free of that pesky body hair. 823 00:39:13,300 --> 00:39:15,183 (grunting) 824 00:39:15,233 --> 00:39:16,983 - Don't you want us? 825 00:39:17,033 --> 00:39:18,750 - Are you sick or something? 826 00:39:18,800 --> 00:39:19,684 Perverted? 827 00:39:19,734 --> 00:39:22,583 The wax will set you free. 828 00:39:22,633 --> 00:39:23,817 - Get on out of here, young women, 829 00:39:23,867 --> 00:39:25,250 or we'll make you walk the plank. 830 00:39:25,300 --> 00:39:28,283 - We'll make shark bait out of you, now git. 831 00:39:28,333 --> 00:39:30,500 (gasping) 832 00:39:31,700 --> 00:39:34,600 (captains grumble) 833 00:39:36,033 --> 00:39:37,216 Ain't seen the like of this 834 00:39:37,266 --> 00:39:38,817 since we rode with Teddy Roosevelt. 835 00:39:38,867 --> 00:39:39,850 - Pershing. 836 00:39:39,900 --> 00:39:41,083 - Roosevelt. 837 00:39:41,133 --> 00:39:42,617 - That was Pershing, you don't know. 838 00:39:42,667 --> 00:39:44,250 - Goldang it, it was Roosevelt, you old fool. 839 00:39:44,300 --> 00:39:45,216 - You wouldn't know Roosevelt 840 00:39:45,266 --> 00:39:46,834 if he came up, shook your hand. 841 00:39:54,333 --> 00:39:55,200 - What's up, Ted. 842 00:39:56,367 --> 00:39:57,450 (ominous music) 843 00:39:57,500 --> 00:39:58,333 How's Pilar? 844 00:39:59,533 --> 00:40:02,750 - No more pesky body hair. 845 00:40:02,800 --> 00:40:04,650 - Yeah, well you know, I try not to meddle 846 00:40:04,700 --> 00:40:06,367 in people's marital affairs, but, 847 00:40:07,400 --> 00:40:08,717 a little turn-off, huh? 848 00:40:08,767 --> 00:40:10,317 You know, the hair? 849 00:40:10,367 --> 00:40:11,517 (Ted yells) 850 00:40:11,567 --> 00:40:12,717 Hey, hey, hey hey hey, what's the matter? 851 00:40:12,767 --> 00:40:14,417 Hey, Ted, don't be afraid, it's me, Mick. 852 00:40:14,467 --> 00:40:16,583 Here, take 14 bucks. 853 00:40:16,633 --> 00:40:18,050 (Ted yells) 854 00:40:18,100 --> 00:40:19,950 Here, come on, take the $14, come on. 855 00:40:20,000 --> 00:40:21,583 - Get out! 856 00:40:21,633 --> 00:40:23,050 - The money. 857 00:40:23,100 --> 00:40:24,350 - Get out! 858 00:40:24,400 --> 00:40:26,083 Go away! 859 00:40:26,133 --> 00:40:27,317 - Ted. 860 00:40:27,367 --> 00:40:31,550 - You will become unbelievably horny. 861 00:40:31,600 --> 00:40:36,600 Look at Pilar, 180 pounds of bucking bronco. 862 00:40:40,100 --> 00:40:41,083 - Unbelievably? 863 00:40:41,133 --> 00:40:43,583 - Get out! 864 00:40:43,633 --> 00:40:44,950 - Horny? 865 00:40:45,000 --> 00:40:46,583 (thunder crashes) 866 00:40:46,633 --> 00:40:49,266 (ominous music) 867 00:41:09,667 --> 00:41:12,050 (door creaking) 868 00:41:12,100 --> 00:41:13,550 (fingers snapping) Ah! 869 00:41:13,600 --> 00:41:16,467 - We've been expecting you, Mr. Orion. 870 00:41:18,367 --> 00:41:20,483 - Have you now? 871 00:41:20,533 --> 00:41:22,550 - You seem most interested in what our little 872 00:41:22,600 --> 00:41:24,600 salon has to offer. 873 00:41:26,000 --> 00:41:27,300 How 'bout a demonstration. 874 00:41:28,600 --> 00:41:30,150 (harp music) 875 00:41:30,200 --> 00:41:32,216 (women moaning and laughing) 876 00:41:32,266 --> 00:41:34,533 (laughing) 877 00:41:38,100 --> 00:41:40,500 (harp music) 878 00:41:41,900 --> 00:41:43,734 - Uh, oh, come on. 879 00:41:45,400 --> 00:41:46,200 Come on, come on. 880 00:41:47,934 --> 00:41:48,734 Dang. 881 00:41:49,934 --> 00:41:53,216 (spring boinging) 882 00:41:53,266 --> 00:41:54,066 Sorry. 883 00:41:55,133 --> 00:41:58,250 (ominous orchestral music) 884 00:41:58,300 --> 00:42:01,633 - Oh, he was so well hung. 885 00:42:03,200 --> 00:42:06,950 Take him to room number four. 886 00:42:07,000 --> 00:42:08,850 - Whoa, whoa, come on, come on. 887 00:42:08,900 --> 00:42:12,000 Come on, no, no, not room number four. 888 00:42:16,000 --> 00:42:17,950 ("La Bamba") 889 00:42:18,000 --> 00:42:20,667 (phone ringing) 890 00:42:24,600 --> 00:42:25,884 - Hey, I'm probably out 891 00:42:25,934 --> 00:42:27,450 giving a buzz cut, so leave a message. 892 00:42:27,500 --> 00:42:29,650 (voicemail beeping) 893 00:42:29,700 --> 00:42:30,900 - Hi, honey, it's me. 894 00:42:32,266 --> 00:42:35,850 I'm feeling a little, I don't know. 895 00:42:35,900 --> 00:42:39,250 Um, okay so, maybe I've been a little preoccupied lately 896 00:42:39,300 --> 00:42:42,617 but um, I just need to feel safer 897 00:42:42,667 --> 00:42:45,266 with all this going on, so um. 898 00:42:46,900 --> 00:42:48,934 Anyway, I've got a surprise for you. 899 00:42:50,533 --> 00:42:52,750 It's the top of the line at the shop. 900 00:42:52,800 --> 00:42:53,983 (chuckling) 901 00:42:54,033 --> 00:42:56,600 So um, get here ASAP, okay? 902 00:43:00,066 --> 00:43:04,150 - This is a simple process of osmosis. 903 00:43:04,200 --> 00:43:10,083 While the wax is bonding to your pesky body hair, 904 00:43:10,133 --> 00:43:13,383 this chemical is seeping into your skin, 905 00:43:13,433 --> 00:43:15,800 into your very psyche. 906 00:43:16,800 --> 00:43:18,283 - Yeah well, you see, I'm Irish, 907 00:43:18,333 --> 00:43:21,283 and I really don't want anything seeping into my psyche. 908 00:43:21,333 --> 00:43:24,750 - (laughs) Once you're with us, you'll see. 909 00:43:24,800 --> 00:43:27,750 All the barriers are down. 910 00:43:27,800 --> 00:43:30,483 No fear, no hate. 911 00:43:30,533 --> 00:43:36,216 No evulsion, no pesky bodism sentimentality. 912 00:43:36,266 --> 00:43:38,867 Just pure sensualism. 913 00:43:41,266 --> 00:43:42,150 - Gosh. 914 00:43:42,200 --> 00:43:43,800 - Yes, gosh. 915 00:43:45,834 --> 00:43:47,116 (hissing) 916 00:43:47,166 --> 00:43:48,950 This may sting a little. 917 00:43:49,000 --> 00:43:51,400 (Mick yells) 918 00:43:52,834 --> 00:43:53,800 - Damn it, Mick. 919 00:43:56,900 --> 00:43:58,100 Where are you? 920 00:44:02,166 --> 00:44:03,300 Think, think. 921 00:44:10,600 --> 00:44:13,600 (upbeat jazz music) 922 00:44:14,967 --> 00:44:17,967 (needle scratching) 923 00:44:20,033 --> 00:44:20,867 Yes. 924 00:44:24,867 --> 00:44:27,433 (wind blowing) 925 00:44:30,500 --> 00:44:32,900 (Mick yells) 926 00:44:36,100 --> 00:44:38,583 - Hey, he's taking this very well, isn't he? 927 00:44:38,633 --> 00:44:39,467 - Yes. 928 00:44:49,700 --> 00:44:50,667 Leave us. 929 00:44:53,700 --> 00:44:57,033 Now you will feel what you have never felt before. 930 00:44:59,900 --> 00:45:02,917 (Yvonne moans) 931 00:45:02,967 --> 00:45:03,800 Blood. 932 00:45:10,934 --> 00:45:13,834 See how much better it is without-- 933 00:45:14,767 --> 00:45:15,967 - Pesky body hair. 934 00:45:25,233 --> 00:45:28,133 (rattling outside) 935 00:45:34,667 --> 00:45:36,934 (rattling) 936 00:45:38,700 --> 00:45:41,216 - Nothing's going to happen, dipshit, there's no music. 937 00:45:41,266 --> 00:45:43,250 There's always music when something's going to happen. 938 00:45:43,300 --> 00:45:45,250 (ominous music) 939 00:45:45,300 --> 00:45:46,133 Oh, jeez. 940 00:45:48,166 --> 00:45:51,000 (thunder crashes) 941 00:46:01,266 --> 00:46:03,050 (phone ringing) 942 00:46:03,100 --> 00:46:06,583 - Thank you for calling 9-1-1 emergency services. 943 00:46:06,633 --> 00:46:08,417 We're out of the office at the moment, 944 00:46:08,467 --> 00:46:11,083 but if it's really, really urgent, 945 00:46:11,133 --> 00:46:13,550 having to do with pesky body hair, 946 00:46:13,600 --> 00:46:17,216 please page us at Wayne's Depilation Palace, 947 00:46:17,266 --> 00:46:21,500 and we hope you have a nice, hairless, fulfilling day. 948 00:46:26,500 --> 00:46:28,517 - Mick won't answer his phone. 949 00:46:28,567 --> 00:46:30,467 9-1-1's at an orgy. 950 00:46:33,233 --> 00:46:34,884 (suspenseful orchestral music) 951 00:46:34,934 --> 00:46:37,700 (Sharon screams) 952 00:46:39,700 --> 00:46:40,884 - We're here. 953 00:46:40,934 --> 00:46:42,150 - I'll use it. 954 00:46:42,200 --> 00:46:44,750 - I hope you're wearing nice underwear, Sharon. 955 00:46:44,800 --> 00:46:47,050 - Really now, there's no need for violence. 956 00:46:47,100 --> 00:46:48,283 Have the treatment. 957 00:46:48,333 --> 00:46:49,850 Be one of us. 958 00:46:49,900 --> 00:46:52,817 - No more hate, no fear, no jealousy. 959 00:46:52,867 --> 00:46:55,016 - No more teacher's dirty looks. 960 00:46:55,066 --> 00:46:58,417 - You'll discover your true sensuality within, 961 00:46:58,467 --> 00:47:00,116 beneath all that pesky-- 962 00:47:00,166 --> 00:47:01,083 - Body hair. 963 00:47:01,133 --> 00:47:03,150 I always wanted you, you know. 964 00:47:03,200 --> 00:47:05,050 - I'll slice you into candles, I promise. 965 00:47:05,100 --> 00:47:07,050 - Sounds sensual. 966 00:47:07,100 --> 00:47:08,850 - You can't kill us, Sharon. 967 00:47:08,900 --> 00:47:11,016 We're zombies, hot wax zombies. 968 00:47:11,066 --> 00:47:12,083 We're already dead. 969 00:47:12,133 --> 00:47:12,967 - Ow! 970 00:47:13,867 --> 00:47:14,650 No! 971 00:47:14,700 --> 00:47:17,533 (thunder crashes) 972 00:47:22,800 --> 00:47:24,717 - Genetic deviation. 973 00:47:24,767 --> 00:47:25,550 - Ew. 974 00:47:25,600 --> 00:47:27,266 - Monsters. 975 00:47:28,367 --> 00:47:29,617 - Ugh. 976 00:47:29,667 --> 00:47:32,166 (Ted screams) 977 00:47:34,433 --> 00:47:36,083 That stuff's dynamite. 978 00:47:36,133 --> 00:47:38,784 (cannon fires) 979 00:47:38,834 --> 00:47:39,667 Yow, help! 980 00:47:45,000 --> 00:47:45,884 Help! 981 00:47:45,934 --> 00:47:49,767 (suspenseful orchestral music) 982 00:48:11,300 --> 00:48:12,133 Mick? 983 00:48:16,100 --> 00:48:18,700 (floor creaks) 984 00:48:27,734 --> 00:48:28,517 Mick. 985 00:48:28,567 --> 00:48:31,066 (tense music) 986 00:48:43,834 --> 00:48:44,950 (Sharon gasps) (needle scratching) 987 00:48:45,000 --> 00:48:46,083 Mick. 988 00:48:46,133 --> 00:48:47,983 - Hubba hubba. 989 00:48:48,033 --> 00:48:49,700 - Horny, aren't you? 990 00:48:50,533 --> 00:48:52,133 And insistent, too. 991 00:48:53,266 --> 00:48:54,850 - No. 992 00:48:54,900 --> 00:48:55,884 Come on. 993 00:48:55,934 --> 00:48:57,517 - Where? 994 00:48:57,567 --> 00:48:58,684 - In the kitchen. 995 00:48:58,734 --> 00:49:00,116 - The kitchen? 996 00:49:00,166 --> 00:49:02,200 Don't you know what's happening out there? 997 00:49:06,400 --> 00:49:10,734 We, we, we've gotta run, we've gotta find Sven, I mean. 998 00:49:15,300 --> 00:49:17,800 Hmm, uh, seems a little early for mosquitoes, huh? 999 00:49:20,233 --> 00:49:22,317 So you've been hot waxed, haven't you? 1000 00:49:22,367 --> 00:49:23,850 - It's better than being like you, 1001 00:49:23,900 --> 00:49:26,717 a slave to emotions and pesky body hair. 1002 00:49:26,767 --> 00:49:29,216 - So you don't feel any emotions at all? 1003 00:49:29,266 --> 00:49:31,850 - Only one, lust. 1004 00:49:31,900 --> 00:49:33,850 Insatiable carnality. 1005 00:49:33,900 --> 00:49:35,684 Being free of pesky body hair has opened up 1006 00:49:35,734 --> 00:49:37,250 a whole new world to me. 1007 00:49:37,300 --> 00:49:41,583 A world of ultimate sensuality. 1008 00:49:41,633 --> 00:49:44,350 - Since when do you need help getting horny? 1009 00:49:44,400 --> 00:49:46,417 - It's for the best, Sharon, you'll see. 1010 00:49:46,467 --> 00:49:48,383 We'll spend the rest of our lives together 1011 00:49:48,433 --> 00:49:51,133 experiencing the ultimate sensuality. 1012 00:49:52,300 --> 00:49:54,650 - You, you're repeating yourself. 1013 00:49:54,700 --> 00:49:58,033 - Oh, it's going to be so good, you being one of us. 1014 00:49:58,867 --> 00:50:00,884 Now relax. 1015 00:50:00,934 --> 00:50:02,600 The pain won't last long. 1016 00:50:03,667 --> 00:50:04,650 And when it's over 1017 00:50:04,700 --> 00:50:06,083 (magical chiming music) 1018 00:50:06,133 --> 00:50:08,116 I'll let you be on top. 1019 00:50:08,166 --> 00:50:09,767 - Golly, I can hardly wait. 1020 00:50:12,166 --> 00:50:14,767 (Sharon yells) 1021 00:50:19,433 --> 00:50:22,600 (power drill running) 1022 00:50:24,233 --> 00:50:26,433 Always in the right place at the right time. 1023 00:50:28,700 --> 00:50:29,967 Bye bye, darling. 1024 00:50:31,200 --> 00:50:33,617 - But Sharon, I can help! 1025 00:50:33,667 --> 00:50:36,250 No more pesky body hair! 1026 00:50:36,300 --> 00:50:37,483 Ever! 1027 00:50:37,533 --> 00:50:38,333 - Oh, Sharon. 1028 00:50:45,166 --> 00:50:47,400 (grunting) 1029 00:50:50,900 --> 00:50:52,216 There's no way out, Sharon. 1030 00:50:52,266 --> 00:50:53,483 (knocking on door) 1031 00:50:53,533 --> 00:50:55,050 - Hey, somebody mind letting me out? 1032 00:50:55,100 --> 00:50:59,717 - You can't stop monsters created from man's (thumping) 1033 00:50:59,767 --> 00:51:02,617 gumption of our ecology. 1034 00:51:02,667 --> 00:51:03,650 - Whatever. 1035 00:51:03,700 --> 00:51:05,850 We are the undead, join us. 1036 00:51:05,900 --> 00:51:06,750 - Never 1037 00:51:06,800 --> 00:51:07,717 - Yes, you will. 1038 00:51:07,767 --> 00:51:08,617 - Avast, you squab. 1039 00:51:08,667 --> 00:51:10,100 Hard about, girly. 1040 00:51:11,033 --> 00:51:12,150 Hoist the mainsail. 1041 00:51:12,200 --> 00:51:14,317 (thunder crashing) 1042 00:51:14,367 --> 00:51:17,800 (loud explosion booming) 1043 00:51:20,266 --> 00:51:22,016 - Only your emotions where dead. 1044 00:51:22,066 --> 00:51:23,950 And your follicles, Matt. 1045 00:51:24,000 --> 00:51:26,784 - Oh, that explains it. 1046 00:51:26,834 --> 00:51:27,667 Ow! 1047 00:51:29,266 --> 00:51:30,050 - My God. 1048 00:51:30,100 --> 00:51:31,617 - That's gotta hurt. 1049 00:51:31,667 --> 00:51:33,617 - He looks like he's got a walrus on him. 1050 00:51:33,667 --> 00:51:34,550 - A walrus? 1051 00:51:34,600 --> 00:51:36,016 An albatross, you ol' stubborn-- 1052 00:51:36,066 --> 00:51:38,283 - No, it ain't a damn albatross. 1053 00:51:38,333 --> 00:51:39,166 It's a whale. 1054 00:51:40,133 --> 00:51:40,917 Jesus Christ. 1055 00:51:40,967 --> 00:51:41,983 - Look at the hair. 1056 00:51:42,033 --> 00:51:43,350 Looks like a manatee. 1057 00:51:43,400 --> 00:51:44,967 - What are you? 1058 00:51:45,900 --> 00:51:48,483 - Y-E-W, exactly. 1059 00:51:48,533 --> 00:51:50,583 - Smart zombie, by cracky. 1060 00:51:50,633 --> 00:51:52,817 - Pacific yew. 1061 00:51:52,867 --> 00:51:55,617 Of course, you two knew all along. 1062 00:51:55,667 --> 00:51:57,050 - Best run along, girly, 1063 00:51:57,100 --> 00:51:59,150 while we use these zombies to swab the deck. 1064 00:51:59,200 --> 00:52:02,250 - Cleanse the barnacles and fight the lines. 1065 00:52:02,300 --> 00:52:03,150 - Aye. 1066 00:52:03,200 --> 00:52:04,050 - Wait a minute, fellas. 1067 00:52:04,100 --> 00:52:05,900 I ain't been laid yet. 1068 00:52:07,000 --> 00:52:07,834 Freak! 1069 00:52:09,633 --> 00:52:10,417 (pounding on door) 1070 00:52:10,467 --> 00:52:11,300 - Somebody. 1071 00:52:12,467 --> 00:52:13,983 Open up. 1072 00:52:14,033 --> 00:52:14,867 I'm really horny. 1073 00:52:17,533 --> 00:52:20,050 (ominous orchestral music) 1074 00:52:20,100 --> 00:52:21,050 (zombie moans) 1075 00:52:21,100 --> 00:52:23,834 (Sharon screams) 1076 00:52:29,066 --> 00:52:31,734 (zombie groans) 1077 00:52:36,400 --> 00:52:39,417 - Carrie, Carrie, you've, wah. 1078 00:52:39,467 --> 00:52:40,250 - Hi, Sharon. 1079 00:52:40,300 --> 00:52:42,083 - What are you doing? 1080 00:52:42,133 --> 00:52:43,517 - I'm going to Portland to try out for 1081 00:52:43,567 --> 00:52:45,333 the U.S. national swim team. 1082 00:52:46,400 --> 00:52:50,083 - Oh no, not you too. 1083 00:52:50,133 --> 00:52:52,050 I can't let you spread this contagion. 1084 00:52:52,100 --> 00:52:53,350 - What contagion? 1085 00:52:53,400 --> 00:52:55,050 - Whatever it is that makes people zombies. 1086 00:52:55,100 --> 00:52:58,116 Ravenous, hairless horn dog zombies. 1087 00:52:58,166 --> 00:52:59,317 U.S. swim team? 1088 00:52:59,367 --> 00:53:01,750 - I went to the nationals as a junior. 1089 00:53:01,800 --> 00:53:03,250 I did it all. 1090 00:53:03,300 --> 00:53:05,350 I told you I was thinking of getting back into it. 1091 00:53:05,400 --> 00:53:07,950 Well, here's my opportunity. 1092 00:53:08,000 --> 00:53:09,950 I guess I didn't react like they expected. 1093 00:53:10,000 --> 00:53:11,983 I went to the pool and I practiced. 1094 00:53:12,033 --> 00:53:13,450 I still have it. 1095 00:53:13,500 --> 00:53:14,583 And they were right. 1096 00:53:14,633 --> 00:53:15,750 (screaming) 1097 00:53:15,800 --> 00:53:17,784 I do swim faster. 1098 00:53:17,834 --> 00:53:20,717 - But it d-d-d-didn't turn you into a sex-crazed zombie or? 1099 00:53:20,767 --> 00:53:22,867 - I had no inhibitions to lose. 1100 00:53:24,900 --> 00:53:26,550 Except those keeping from trying out 1101 00:53:26,600 --> 00:53:28,550 for the national swim team. 1102 00:53:28,600 --> 00:53:30,233 And I'm doing that next week. 1103 00:53:32,633 --> 00:53:34,016 - Help me. 1104 00:53:34,066 --> 00:53:35,650 I have to stop them. 1105 00:53:35,700 --> 00:53:37,750 They'll take this formula, and they'll do this again 1106 00:53:37,800 --> 00:53:40,550 in town after town after town unless they're stopped. 1107 00:53:40,600 --> 00:53:41,784 - Okay. 1108 00:53:41,834 --> 00:53:43,650 - I will, I must stop them. 1109 00:53:43,700 --> 00:53:45,066 - Okay, whatever. 1110 00:53:53,433 --> 00:53:55,166 - I'll watch for you on Wide World. 1111 00:53:56,100 --> 00:53:58,684 - Okay, whatever. 1112 00:53:58,734 --> 00:53:59,533 - Carrie. 1113 00:54:07,000 --> 00:54:08,550 (sighing) 1114 00:54:08,600 --> 00:54:11,266 Well, I guess it's just me 1115 00:54:14,133 --> 00:54:14,967 and yew. 1116 00:54:20,500 --> 00:54:24,216 (ominous orchestral music) 1117 00:54:24,266 --> 00:54:27,166 (thunder crashing) 1118 00:54:28,900 --> 00:54:31,917 - Once we corral Congress, then we'll go after 1119 00:54:31,967 --> 00:54:34,667 the closet cross-dressers on the radical right. 1120 00:54:38,834 --> 00:54:41,150 (Sharon grunts) 1121 00:54:41,200 --> 00:54:43,417 Congressmen are so kinky. 1122 00:54:43,467 --> 00:54:44,917 Not to mention the President. 1123 00:54:44,967 --> 00:54:46,950 For say fare (laughs). 1124 00:54:47,000 --> 00:54:48,450 - Ow, oh. 1125 00:54:48,500 --> 00:54:49,333 Ow. 1126 00:54:51,633 --> 00:54:53,900 (grunting) 1127 00:54:58,166 --> 00:55:00,633 (rock music) 1128 00:55:10,133 --> 00:55:10,967 Hot damn. 1129 00:55:12,200 --> 00:55:13,300 It's party time. 1130 00:55:15,433 --> 00:55:18,116 - Everyone I kiss or has cornered over the internet. 1131 00:55:18,166 --> 00:55:20,934 Our power will be limitless (laughs). 1132 00:55:25,200 --> 00:55:28,750 We'll be the gods of ultimate sensualism. 1133 00:55:28,800 --> 00:55:31,116 Rulers of the world, free at last 1134 00:55:31,166 --> 00:55:32,967 from that dreaded stubble. 1135 00:55:35,900 --> 00:55:38,617 Tight-ass Sharon Talbot stands between us 1136 00:55:38,667 --> 00:55:40,266 and total dominion. 1137 00:55:41,900 --> 00:55:43,066 Not a problem. 1138 00:55:43,967 --> 00:55:45,200 - A world without hair. 1139 00:55:46,600 --> 00:55:47,834 Something has to be done. 1140 00:55:51,734 --> 00:55:52,517 - Faster, faster, faster, 1141 00:55:52,567 --> 00:55:53,917 get it in, oh, oh! 1142 00:55:53,967 --> 00:55:54,850 - Fucking rats. 1143 00:55:54,900 --> 00:55:56,450 - Oh baby, oh baby. 1144 00:55:56,500 --> 00:55:59,083 Faster, faster, faster, get it in. 1145 00:55:59,133 --> 00:56:01,300 (moaning) 1146 00:56:11,266 --> 00:56:13,350 - Is that pesky body hair keeping you 1147 00:56:13,400 --> 00:56:15,617 from living life to the fullest? 1148 00:56:15,667 --> 00:56:19,417 If you've answered yes to any of these questions, 1149 00:56:19,467 --> 00:56:21,183 then I'm here to tell you about something 1150 00:56:21,233 --> 00:56:23,767 that will revolutionize your life forever. 1151 00:56:24,700 --> 00:56:27,917 The Wayne WaxOMatic. 1152 00:56:27,967 --> 00:56:31,250 Just a pinch in those hard to reach areas, 1153 00:56:31,300 --> 00:56:33,983 and (gasps) you will find that 1154 00:56:34,033 --> 00:56:36,717 your appointment book will fill up in no time. 1155 00:56:36,767 --> 00:56:38,633 The Wayne WaxOMatic. 1156 00:56:39,800 --> 00:56:43,917 Take it from me, a boon to women everywhere. 1157 00:56:43,967 --> 00:56:45,367 - And we like it, too. 1158 00:56:56,300 --> 00:56:57,100 - Mom. 1159 00:56:58,000 --> 00:56:58,950 You're going cable? 1160 00:56:59,000 --> 00:57:00,750 (suspenseful orchestral music) 1161 00:57:00,800 --> 00:57:01,983 - Martin. 1162 00:57:02,033 --> 00:57:02,917 Come. 1163 00:57:02,967 --> 00:57:04,400 - You calling me dumb? 1164 00:57:23,934 --> 00:57:26,016 (suspenseful orchestral music) 1165 00:57:26,066 --> 00:57:28,667 - Come on, stupid child safety. 1166 00:57:33,967 --> 00:57:34,750 (rock music) 1167 00:57:34,800 --> 00:57:35,850 - Get her. 1168 00:57:35,900 --> 00:57:37,550 - (laughs) "Get her". 1169 00:57:37,600 --> 00:57:38,884 Is that the best you can come up with? 1170 00:57:38,934 --> 00:57:40,050 (Yvonne stammers) 1171 00:57:40,100 --> 00:57:42,517 - Seize the frigid interloper. 1172 00:57:42,567 --> 00:57:43,784 - That's pretty good. 1173 00:57:43,834 --> 00:57:44,667 Whoa! 1174 00:57:46,867 --> 00:57:48,133 - This room is a mess. 1175 00:57:49,400 --> 00:57:51,083 Somebody go get Marion. 1176 00:57:51,133 --> 00:57:53,917 ♪ Yeah, there you go talkin' all of that smack ♪ 1177 00:57:53,967 --> 00:57:54,850 ♪ Thinkin' that you're all 1178 00:57:54,900 --> 00:57:57,517 (door slamming) 1179 00:57:57,567 --> 00:57:58,650 - Ow, ow! 1180 00:57:58,700 --> 00:57:59,884 Mom. 1181 00:57:59,934 --> 00:58:01,850 - Radically cool, isn't it, dear? 1182 00:58:01,900 --> 00:58:03,917 - I have to know, what is the password? 1183 00:58:03,967 --> 00:58:05,417 - Orlando? 1184 00:58:05,467 --> 00:58:07,750 - Damn, almost. 1185 00:58:07,800 --> 00:58:08,633 Ow. 1186 00:58:09,767 --> 00:58:12,850 (thunder crashing) 1187 00:58:12,900 --> 00:58:16,834 (suspenseful orchestral music) 1188 00:58:19,934 --> 00:58:21,050 Shit. 1189 00:58:21,100 --> 00:58:22,884 Help! 1190 00:58:22,934 --> 00:58:25,600 (Yvonne laughs) 1191 00:58:34,934 --> 00:58:36,050 Help! 1192 00:58:36,100 --> 00:58:38,166 - Mmm, I love this thing. 1193 00:58:39,133 --> 00:58:41,867 (Sharon screams) 1194 00:58:42,734 --> 00:58:45,734 (suspenseful music) 1195 00:58:48,333 --> 00:58:51,266 (thunder crashing) 1196 00:58:52,367 --> 00:58:54,350 (Yvonne tsking) 1197 00:58:54,400 --> 00:58:56,983 - Ah, these things always look better 1198 00:58:57,033 --> 00:58:58,917 in the catalogs, don't they? 1199 00:58:58,967 --> 00:59:02,667 Still, it shows a marked lack of self-esteem. 1200 00:59:06,700 --> 00:59:08,800 (laughs) 1201 00:59:12,767 --> 00:59:14,550 (electricity crackling) 1202 00:59:14,600 --> 00:59:15,433 Oh, damn. 1203 00:59:17,233 --> 00:59:18,617 (sighing) 1204 00:59:18,667 --> 00:59:21,533 I hope you don't mind waiting while I see to this. 1205 00:59:22,633 --> 00:59:24,300 Martin will keep you company. 1206 00:59:26,600 --> 00:59:28,800 This better not be those fucking rats again. 1207 00:59:31,533 --> 00:59:34,033 (tense music) 1208 00:59:43,367 --> 00:59:46,166 - Can't you help me? 1209 00:59:48,133 --> 00:59:51,517 I don't want to wait for them to come back and 1210 00:59:51,567 --> 00:59:54,133 see me like this, makes me want you now. 1211 00:59:57,500 --> 00:59:58,734 - Yvonne told me not to. 1212 01:00:00,066 --> 01:00:01,350 - Mmm. 1213 01:00:01,400 --> 01:00:04,934 And I want you to do it. 1214 01:00:07,066 --> 01:00:08,900 - Yvonne won't let me. 1215 01:00:10,734 --> 01:00:11,800 - But I will. 1216 01:00:13,834 --> 01:00:16,400 (tender music) 1217 01:00:20,867 --> 01:00:24,266 (Sharon breaths heavily) 1218 01:00:26,200 --> 01:00:28,100 Not so fast, lover boy (laughs). 1219 01:00:30,467 --> 01:00:31,967 I stuff. 1220 01:00:33,133 --> 01:00:35,650 That's why they call it a booby trap. 1221 01:00:35,700 --> 01:00:36,850 (spring boings) 1222 01:00:36,900 --> 01:00:38,834 - Thank you, thank you very much. 1223 01:00:43,700 --> 01:00:46,283 - This is an outrage! 1224 01:00:46,333 --> 01:00:47,784 - No, this 1225 01:00:47,834 --> 01:00:48,784 is an outage. 1226 01:00:48,834 --> 01:00:50,150 (Yvonne hisses) 1227 01:00:50,200 --> 01:00:51,283 Ooh, scary lady. 1228 01:00:51,333 --> 01:00:53,250 (electricity crackling) 1229 01:00:53,300 --> 01:00:54,483 - How did you do that? 1230 01:00:54,533 --> 01:00:55,450 - I don't know. 1231 01:00:55,500 --> 01:00:56,834 Same way I know how to do this. 1232 01:00:58,133 --> 01:00:59,483 - Oh, what, stop, stop! 1233 01:00:59,533 --> 01:01:02,784 Stop, you're making me dizzy. 1234 01:01:02,834 --> 01:01:04,900 - All right, you and Marion, back in the house. 1235 01:01:05,967 --> 01:01:08,550 (hoe down music) 1236 01:01:08,600 --> 01:01:10,617 (springs boinging) 1237 01:01:10,667 --> 01:01:12,934 (groaning) 1238 01:01:17,400 --> 01:01:21,333 (suspenseful orchestral music) 1239 01:01:22,300 --> 01:01:23,250 Hey, was that you screaming? 1240 01:01:23,300 --> 01:01:24,350 - Yeah, didn't you hear me? 1241 01:01:24,400 --> 01:01:25,784 - Barely. 1242 01:01:25,834 --> 01:01:26,983 I must have wax in my ears. 1243 01:01:27,033 --> 01:01:29,283 Uh, your blouse and your, uh, accoutrements, 1244 01:01:29,333 --> 01:01:31,884 it's uh, they're open. 1245 01:01:31,934 --> 01:01:32,767 Here. 1246 01:01:36,600 --> 01:01:37,567 - Carrie was right. 1247 01:01:38,433 --> 01:01:39,734 You are the real guy. 1248 01:01:41,000 --> 01:01:43,283 (quiet farting) 1249 01:01:43,333 --> 01:01:44,166 To Gold Rock. 1250 01:01:45,233 --> 01:01:46,066 - What, now? 1251 01:01:49,367 --> 01:01:51,884 (grunting) 1252 01:01:51,934 --> 01:01:53,517 - Okay, that's it. 1253 01:01:53,567 --> 01:01:55,850 They've had their chance, we're nailing them! 1254 01:01:55,900 --> 01:01:56,817 My cape. 1255 01:01:56,867 --> 01:01:58,583 - Oh, I had it cleaned. 1256 01:01:58,633 --> 01:02:01,367 What with the wax and the road grime and everything. 1257 01:02:05,166 --> 01:02:06,266 - Let's ride! 1258 01:02:08,734 --> 01:02:12,667 (adventurous orchestral music) 1259 01:02:17,200 --> 01:02:20,083 - Wow, she said I was the real guy. 1260 01:02:20,133 --> 01:02:21,583 I wonder if she meant it, though. 1261 01:02:21,633 --> 01:02:24,483 I mean, you know how women, they just kind of say things. 1262 01:02:24,533 --> 01:02:26,550 Wait, wait a minute, I mean, I'm real. 1263 01:02:26,600 --> 01:02:28,533 And I'm a guy, definitely a guy. 1264 01:02:29,500 --> 01:02:30,517 Wait a minute, wait a minute. 1265 01:02:30,567 --> 01:02:32,317 Mick's my best friend. 1266 01:02:32,367 --> 01:02:34,050 And Sharon's his gal. 1267 01:02:34,100 --> 01:02:36,650 No, I can't do that to Mick, no way. 1268 01:02:36,700 --> 01:02:37,500 No way, I, 1269 01:02:38,400 --> 01:02:40,750 yeah I can, yeah I can. 1270 01:02:40,800 --> 01:02:41,684 Cool. 1271 01:02:41,734 --> 01:02:42,700 I got a girlfriend. 1272 01:02:44,667 --> 01:02:45,983 (needle scratches) 1273 01:02:46,033 --> 01:02:48,467 (rock music) 1274 01:02:55,233 --> 01:02:56,016 (needle scratches) 1275 01:02:56,066 --> 01:02:56,983 (adventurous music) 1276 01:02:57,033 --> 01:02:58,400 - Sven is the real guy. 1277 01:02:59,834 --> 01:03:01,133 Can I do this to Mick? 1278 01:03:04,000 --> 01:03:06,583 Yep, I can do that to Mick. 1279 01:03:06,633 --> 01:03:08,517 - Is that an echo? 1280 01:03:08,567 --> 01:03:09,400 Cool. 1281 01:03:13,800 --> 01:03:17,633 (singing in foreign language) 1282 01:03:21,834 --> 01:03:25,650 - Oh my gosh, she's right behind us. 1283 01:03:25,700 --> 01:03:29,033 - A-ooo-ga, a-ooo-ga, down below! 1284 01:03:31,100 --> 01:03:33,983 (Yvonne yells) 1285 01:03:34,033 --> 01:03:35,317 - Drive on! 1286 01:03:35,367 --> 01:03:37,216 Let's get 'em! 1287 01:03:37,266 --> 01:03:38,100 Whoo! 1288 01:03:53,600 --> 01:03:56,934 - I think we lost them a few miles back. 1289 01:03:58,000 --> 01:03:58,800 But why here? 1290 01:04:01,367 --> 01:04:03,967 (tender music) 1291 01:04:18,066 --> 01:04:20,684 Okay, enough about geography. 1292 01:04:20,734 --> 01:04:21,567 But your timing. 1293 01:04:23,000 --> 01:04:25,200 - Think about it as making up for lost time. 1294 01:04:27,500 --> 01:04:31,000 (motorcycles approaching) 1295 01:04:39,133 --> 01:04:42,734 We've got to get to Freeport before Yvonne. 1296 01:04:47,734 --> 01:04:51,567 (singing in foreign language) 1297 01:04:57,467 --> 01:05:00,650 (light synth music) 1298 01:05:00,700 --> 01:05:01,884 - Good evening. 1299 01:05:01,934 --> 01:05:03,417 - Uh, good evening, I'm uh, Sharon Talbot, 1300 01:05:03,467 --> 01:05:06,116 City Councilwoman from Daneport, 1301 01:05:06,166 --> 01:05:09,283 and this is Sven Jacobsen, one of our local businessmen. 1302 01:05:09,333 --> 01:05:10,884 - I'm impressed. 1303 01:05:10,934 --> 01:05:13,150 - Is, is there a captain on duty? 1304 01:05:13,200 --> 01:05:14,650 - Got a problem? 1305 01:05:14,700 --> 01:05:16,834 - Listen, I think we need to talk to the watch captain. 1306 01:05:18,066 --> 01:05:19,950 - I'm not good enough, is that it, huh? 1307 01:05:20,000 --> 01:05:21,650 Who do you think you are, rolling in here, 1308 01:05:21,700 --> 01:05:23,317 trying to get past me to the captain 1309 01:05:23,367 --> 01:05:24,850 without any explanation? 1310 01:05:24,900 --> 01:05:28,250 Just trying to pull rank, go over my head, do an end run? 1311 01:05:28,300 --> 01:05:31,983 Is that it, Miss City Fucking Councilwoman? 1312 01:05:32,033 --> 01:05:34,000 Big fucking deal. 1313 01:05:35,667 --> 01:05:37,283 - Hey, may we see the watch captain, please? 1314 01:05:37,333 --> 01:05:39,533 You don't understand, this is about zombies. 1315 01:05:40,700 --> 01:05:41,483 - Zombies? 1316 01:05:41,533 --> 01:05:42,367 - Yeah. 1317 01:05:43,200 --> 01:05:43,983 - Zombies. 1318 01:05:44,033 --> 01:05:46,250 - Yeah. 1319 01:05:46,300 --> 01:05:48,767 - Well yeah, why didn't you guys just say so. 1320 01:05:52,800 --> 01:05:54,083 - He wouldn't believe it, can you believe it? 1321 01:05:54,133 --> 01:05:55,183 - Oh, I can believe it. 1322 01:05:55,233 --> 01:05:56,016 I mean, can you believe it? 1323 01:05:56,066 --> 01:05:57,817 It's unbelievable. 1324 01:05:57,867 --> 01:05:58,784 But I believe it. 1325 01:05:58,834 --> 01:06:00,083 - Hmm. 1326 01:06:00,133 --> 01:06:01,817 Well, there's one way to make him believe it. 1327 01:06:01,867 --> 01:06:03,100 Believe me. 1328 01:06:04,633 --> 01:06:05,417 - What? 1329 01:06:05,467 --> 01:06:06,500 - Follow me. 1330 01:06:07,800 --> 01:06:09,850 (beeping) 1331 01:06:09,900 --> 01:06:12,517 Please, lock all your doors, bolt all your windows. 1332 01:06:12,567 --> 01:06:15,183 A group of hot wax zombies is coming to town. 1333 01:06:15,233 --> 01:06:16,383 - Awesome. 1334 01:06:16,433 --> 01:06:17,950 - And if they find you, you'll be destroyed. 1335 01:06:18,000 --> 01:06:19,884 So you gotta start gathering yew. 1336 01:06:19,934 --> 01:06:21,116 You got it? 1337 01:06:21,166 --> 01:06:22,333 You gotta make your yew turn on them. 1338 01:06:23,533 --> 01:06:24,317 What am I saying? 1339 01:06:24,367 --> 01:06:27,533 (motorcycles revving) 1340 01:06:28,934 --> 01:06:30,183 They're here, they're here! 1341 01:06:30,233 --> 01:06:32,317 Look out for the zombies! 1342 01:06:32,367 --> 01:06:33,717 (rock music) 1343 01:06:33,767 --> 01:06:34,600 - Oh, jeez. 1344 01:06:35,800 --> 01:06:37,834 All those years of therapy shot to shit. 1345 01:06:39,600 --> 01:06:40,817 - So. 1346 01:06:40,867 --> 01:06:41,650 - So. 1347 01:06:41,700 --> 01:06:42,483 - It's you. 1348 01:06:42,533 --> 01:06:43,884 - It's you. 1349 01:06:43,934 --> 01:06:44,817 - Evidently. 1350 01:06:44,867 --> 01:06:45,817 - You can't escape, you know. 1351 01:06:45,867 --> 01:06:46,884 - I won't surrender. 1352 01:06:46,934 --> 01:06:48,650 - Good, I like a challenge. 1353 01:06:48,700 --> 01:06:51,050 - You want to take over the world. 1354 01:06:51,100 --> 01:06:52,483 - I said I like challenges. 1355 01:06:52,533 --> 01:06:53,750 - I won't let you. 1356 01:06:53,800 --> 01:06:58,283 - (laughs) You can't stop me. 1357 01:06:58,333 --> 01:07:00,617 - Maybe not. 1358 01:07:00,667 --> 01:07:02,784 (laughing) 1359 01:07:02,834 --> 01:07:04,450 But I can try. 1360 01:07:04,500 --> 01:07:06,417 I know what you are. 1361 01:07:06,467 --> 01:07:08,250 You've learned the nearly forgotten secret 1362 01:07:08,300 --> 01:07:10,250 of formula H-73, 1363 01:07:10,300 --> 01:07:12,483 the chemical developed during the Spanish-American War 1364 01:07:12,533 --> 01:07:16,050 to demoralize the enemy by causing increased hair loss, 1365 01:07:16,100 --> 01:07:18,750 and increased lima bean crop yields. 1366 01:07:18,800 --> 01:07:21,350 But it had a side effect. 1367 01:07:21,400 --> 01:07:24,517 It turned people into unfeeling sex crazed zombies. 1368 01:07:24,567 --> 01:07:26,283 Well, it won't work, because there's more to life 1369 01:07:26,333 --> 01:07:29,383 than sex and pleasure and smooth skin. 1370 01:07:29,433 --> 01:07:33,383 There's love and honor and shaving. 1371 01:07:33,433 --> 01:07:34,467 - You think so? 1372 01:07:35,367 --> 01:07:37,383 (laughing) 1373 01:07:37,433 --> 01:07:40,817 Well, we'll see. 1374 01:07:40,867 --> 01:07:44,500 You might like even sleeping with your stud Mick. 1375 01:07:45,567 --> 01:07:46,784 I do. 1376 01:07:46,834 --> 01:07:47,617 - Uh-oh. 1377 01:07:47,667 --> 01:07:49,216 - You won't any more. 1378 01:07:49,266 --> 01:07:50,750 (both yelling) 1379 01:07:50,800 --> 01:07:53,717 (upbeat rock music) 1380 01:07:53,767 --> 01:07:55,283 ♪ Whoa 1381 01:07:55,333 --> 01:07:58,317 - Ow. 1382 01:07:58,367 --> 01:08:01,016 (grunting) 1383 01:08:01,066 --> 01:08:03,383 ♪ Woke up this morning with an ache in my head ♪ 1384 01:08:03,433 --> 01:08:04,550 ♪ Got a little crazy 1385 01:08:04,600 --> 01:08:06,016 ♪ Now I'm feelin' half dead 1386 01:08:06,066 --> 01:08:08,583 ♪ Drinkin' last night didn't make it go away ♪ 1387 01:08:08,633 --> 01:08:12,050 ♪ Should have the same if I make it today ♪ 1388 01:08:12,100 --> 01:08:16,750 ♪ I just can't wait till it makes me numb again ♪ 1389 01:08:16,800 --> 01:08:18,917 ♪ When I go back and then 1390 01:08:18,967 --> 01:08:22,317 ♪ She's my only friend 1391 01:08:22,367 --> 01:08:24,583 ♪ Whoa 1392 01:08:24,633 --> 01:08:25,583 ♪ Same old me 1393 01:08:25,633 --> 01:08:27,784 ♪ It's the same old remedy 1394 01:08:27,834 --> 01:08:29,050 ♪ Whoa 1395 01:08:29,100 --> 01:08:30,317 - Let her go! 1396 01:08:30,367 --> 01:08:31,483 - Not yet, I'm almost there. 1397 01:08:31,533 --> 01:08:32,717 - Let her go, or I'll let you have it! 1398 01:08:32,767 --> 01:08:33,550 - What? 1399 01:08:33,600 --> 01:08:34,950 That zombie's dangerous. 1400 01:08:35,000 --> 01:08:38,250 - All God's creatures have a right to life. 1401 01:08:38,300 --> 01:08:41,183 - What makes you think I'm God's creature? 1402 01:08:41,233 --> 01:08:42,617 - Don't quibble. 1403 01:08:42,667 --> 01:08:45,216 Now you, you zombie. 1404 01:08:45,266 --> 01:08:46,850 You get out of here. 1405 01:08:46,900 --> 01:08:47,950 Get out of town. 1406 01:08:48,000 --> 01:08:49,917 Never come here again. 1407 01:08:49,967 --> 01:08:51,517 (fingers snapping) 1408 01:08:51,567 --> 01:08:52,650 - Next time! 1409 01:08:52,700 --> 01:08:53,533 - Count on it! 1410 01:08:56,300 --> 01:08:58,283 Whew. 1411 01:08:58,333 --> 01:09:00,417 Do you know what you've unleashed on the world? 1412 01:09:00,467 --> 01:09:01,884 The terror, the horror? 1413 01:09:01,934 --> 01:09:03,983 - We mustn't raise our hands against one another. 1414 01:09:04,033 --> 01:09:06,517 We must learn to live in peace and harmony. 1415 01:09:06,567 --> 01:09:08,550 - See what I gotta work with here, man? 1416 01:09:08,600 --> 01:09:09,784 - Lovely, just lovely. 1417 01:09:09,834 --> 01:09:11,517 Wait'll they rip your eyebrows off. 1418 01:09:11,567 --> 01:09:14,000 - They never hurt those that are one with nature. 1419 01:09:15,300 --> 01:09:16,133 - Uh-huh, okay. 1420 01:09:18,100 --> 01:09:19,850 - Remember, respect one another. 1421 01:09:19,900 --> 01:09:20,717 - Yeah. 1422 01:09:20,767 --> 01:09:21,550 - Whoa. 1423 01:09:21,600 --> 01:09:22,667 - Peace at last. 1424 01:09:23,567 --> 01:09:25,083 (thunder crashing) 1425 01:09:25,133 --> 01:09:28,133 (upbeat rock music) 1426 01:09:32,200 --> 01:09:33,583 - Hard about. 1427 01:09:33,633 --> 01:09:36,283 - Hard about to port, goldang it. 1428 01:09:36,333 --> 01:09:37,684 (truck crashing) 1429 01:09:37,734 --> 01:09:39,517 I told you hard about to port. 1430 01:09:39,567 --> 01:09:41,817 - She don't steer like a ship, you old grunion. 1431 01:09:41,867 --> 01:09:43,050 - And you don't steer like a captain, 1432 01:09:43,100 --> 01:09:44,750 you miserable pool of squid ink. 1433 01:09:44,800 --> 01:09:46,583 - How was I supposed to know she'd pitch and yaw 1434 01:09:46,633 --> 01:09:48,450 like a derelict, you rum head? 1435 01:09:48,500 --> 01:09:49,817 (grumbling) 1436 01:09:49,867 --> 01:09:51,617 (suspenseful orchestral music) 1437 01:09:51,667 --> 01:09:54,183 - Sharon look, that's the captains' truck. 1438 01:09:54,233 --> 01:09:56,083 - It's a total wreck. 1439 01:09:56,133 --> 01:09:57,817 Look at all that yew. 1440 01:09:57,867 --> 01:09:59,250 - Who, me? 1441 01:09:59,300 --> 01:10:00,734 - Don't start with me. 1442 01:10:02,433 --> 01:10:05,550 - (laughs) Oh, that's one load that won't get 1443 01:10:05,600 --> 01:10:07,900 to that tight-ass Sharon Talbot. 1444 01:10:09,934 --> 01:10:11,116 (zombies growling) 1445 01:10:11,166 --> 01:10:15,517 - I will not sleep until these, these-- 1446 01:10:15,567 --> 01:10:16,550 - Zombies. 1447 01:10:16,600 --> 01:10:17,517 - Are laid-- 1448 01:10:17,567 --> 01:10:18,350 - They'd like that. 1449 01:10:18,400 --> 01:10:19,400 - To rest. 1450 01:10:21,500 --> 01:10:22,333 Are you with me? 1451 01:10:23,533 --> 01:10:24,650 - Me? 1452 01:10:24,700 --> 01:10:25,533 A barber? 1453 01:10:26,467 --> 01:10:27,333 Need you ask? 1454 01:10:29,333 --> 01:10:31,100 - You know what this means, don't you? 1455 01:10:32,433 --> 01:10:34,417 We'll never be able to sleep soundly, 1456 01:10:34,467 --> 01:10:36,517 never be able to trust anyone. 1457 01:10:36,567 --> 01:10:39,016 Always on the run, always on the lookout. 1458 01:10:39,066 --> 01:10:41,483 Never a home or a life of our own. 1459 01:10:41,533 --> 01:10:43,834 - You mean, we're going to Los Angeles? 1460 01:10:45,467 --> 01:10:47,983 - It'll be a totally different way of life. 1461 01:10:48,033 --> 01:10:49,617 - And we can charge it. 1462 01:10:49,667 --> 01:10:51,350 - All right! 1463 01:10:51,400 --> 01:10:53,517 (both cheering) 1464 01:10:53,567 --> 01:10:56,133 (upbeat music) 1465 01:11:08,600 --> 01:11:10,950 - Wow, Beverly Hills. 1466 01:11:11,000 --> 01:11:14,934 - Land of silicone and liposuction. 1467 01:11:16,033 --> 01:11:18,200 A perfect hideout for Yvonne. 1468 01:11:22,467 --> 01:11:25,517 - Whoa, that guy just missed me by a hair. 1469 01:11:25,567 --> 01:11:26,850 - Look out, Sven, these people 1470 01:11:26,900 --> 01:11:29,383 are hairless and brainless. 1471 01:11:29,433 --> 01:11:30,600 - Beverly Hills. 1472 01:11:35,367 --> 01:11:37,517 - Sharon, slow down. 1473 01:11:37,567 --> 01:11:39,817 Look, that trolley's out of control. 1474 01:11:39,867 --> 01:11:41,083 - My God. 1475 01:11:41,133 --> 01:11:43,300 - Ahh, no brakes! 1476 01:11:44,667 --> 01:11:48,216 - God Teddy, your legs are so smooth. 1477 01:11:48,266 --> 01:11:50,533 Did you get them, you know, done? 1478 01:11:51,500 --> 01:11:53,200 - Chez Yvonne on Rodeo. 1479 01:11:54,533 --> 01:11:56,600 Everybody gets done there. 1480 01:11:58,000 --> 01:12:00,917 It has opened up a whole new world 1481 01:12:00,967 --> 01:12:05,600 of friction free ecstasy for me, you know. 1482 01:12:06,900 --> 01:12:07,983 - Towels, ladies? 1483 01:12:08,033 --> 01:12:13,650 - Oh, life is finally worth living, 1484 01:12:13,700 --> 01:12:17,266 without all that pesky body hair. 1485 01:12:26,700 --> 01:12:29,033 - What's that address again? 1486 01:12:33,333 --> 01:12:36,166 (water splashing) 1487 01:12:46,734 --> 01:12:49,467 (elevator music) 1488 01:12:55,166 --> 01:12:57,567 (rock music) 1489 01:13:08,433 --> 01:13:12,367 (adventurous orchestral music) 1490 01:13:22,467 --> 01:13:24,083 (elevator music) 1491 01:13:24,133 --> 01:13:27,083 - Excuse me, the garden is outside. 1492 01:13:27,133 --> 01:13:29,400 - We're not here for hedge trimming. 1493 01:13:33,066 --> 01:13:36,116 (electricity crackling) 1494 01:13:36,166 --> 01:13:39,150 Ladies and gentlemen, this salon is closed. 1495 01:13:39,200 --> 01:13:40,617 - Closed? 1496 01:13:40,667 --> 01:13:43,383 - Do you know the contagion that this waxing process 1497 01:13:43,433 --> 01:13:45,317 is wreaking on the country? 1498 01:13:45,367 --> 01:13:48,383 You may not have to shave your legs for six months, sure, 1499 01:13:48,433 --> 01:13:50,517 but the cost is incalculable. 1500 01:13:50,567 --> 01:13:51,983 - First time is free. 1501 01:13:52,033 --> 01:13:53,983 - Your first time is well beyond free. 1502 01:13:54,033 --> 01:13:55,884 You lose all feeling, all emotion. 1503 01:13:55,934 --> 01:13:58,350 You become obsessed with satiating your deepest desires 1504 01:13:58,400 --> 01:14:00,116 at the cost of your fellow man. 1505 01:14:00,166 --> 01:14:02,250 - And that might be all right for you people 1506 01:14:02,300 --> 01:14:06,400 here in Beverly Hills, but not for the rest of America. 1507 01:14:08,367 --> 01:14:10,934 (cannon fires) 1508 01:14:14,900 --> 01:14:17,983 And on top of all that, you lose your desire to shop. 1509 01:14:18,033 --> 01:14:21,517 (customers clamoring) 1510 01:14:21,567 --> 01:14:22,684 (cannon fires) 1511 01:14:22,734 --> 01:14:24,967 (coughing) 1512 01:14:26,133 --> 01:14:28,350 Mom, Mom, are you okay? 1513 01:14:28,400 --> 01:14:31,784 - Stop with the dust, Sharon, jeez. 1514 01:14:31,834 --> 01:14:35,433 Oh, how could I have been so blind? 1515 01:14:37,000 --> 01:14:38,583 - Oh Mom. 1516 01:14:38,633 --> 01:14:39,983 Mom, listen to me. 1517 01:14:40,033 --> 01:14:41,817 Go home now, leave. 1518 01:14:41,867 --> 01:14:45,450 If you, if you listen to us, we can help you, set you free. 1519 01:14:45,500 --> 01:14:48,400 - It was kind of fun dear, but now, 1520 01:14:49,633 --> 01:14:51,116 stubble. 1521 01:14:51,166 --> 01:14:54,050 - Just leave this all behind, it's a bad dream, that's all. 1522 01:14:54,100 --> 01:14:56,583 - It did have its compensations, though. 1523 01:14:56,633 --> 01:14:57,467 - Mom! 1524 01:14:58,300 --> 01:15:01,450 - Oh, oh. 1525 01:15:01,500 --> 01:15:03,383 - Oh God, that feels so good. 1526 01:15:03,433 --> 01:15:04,817 - Rats. 1527 01:15:04,867 --> 01:15:06,050 - Oh baby, oh baby, faster, faster, faster, 1528 01:15:06,100 --> 01:15:07,233 get it in, oh, oh. 1529 01:15:09,300 --> 01:15:10,083 (woman screams) 1530 01:15:10,133 --> 01:15:10,917 Oh baby. 1531 01:15:10,967 --> 01:15:12,467 Get it in, oh, oh. 1532 01:15:13,367 --> 01:15:16,266 (light jazz music) 1533 01:15:17,800 --> 01:15:19,317 - Hey babe. 1534 01:15:19,367 --> 01:15:20,200 Ooh. 1535 01:15:22,300 --> 01:15:24,050 - Remember, the real Mick died months ago. 1536 01:15:24,100 --> 01:15:25,650 - Only his follicles. 1537 01:15:25,700 --> 01:15:27,083 - Remember the good times we had? 1538 01:15:27,133 --> 01:15:28,116 - Remember how they ended. 1539 01:15:28,166 --> 01:15:29,550 - They can come again. 1540 01:15:29,600 --> 01:15:32,884 You and me and some recreational underwear. 1541 01:15:32,934 --> 01:15:33,900 It's all possible. 1542 01:15:35,367 --> 01:15:36,200 - Bet me. 1543 01:15:37,734 --> 01:15:40,116 (cannon fires) 1544 01:15:40,166 --> 01:15:41,950 (upbeat music) 1545 01:15:42,000 --> 01:15:44,567 (Mick screams) 1546 01:15:46,333 --> 01:15:47,166 Let's bet. 1547 01:15:48,800 --> 01:15:49,800 - What about Yvonne? 1548 01:15:50,867 --> 01:15:51,734 - My God, Sharon! 1549 01:15:53,100 --> 01:15:53,934 You saved me. 1550 01:15:55,133 --> 01:15:57,450 I mean, til now, I was just a stud, right? 1551 01:15:57,500 --> 01:15:59,317 How can I thank you? 1552 01:15:59,367 --> 01:16:00,917 - You putz! 1553 01:16:00,967 --> 01:16:02,850 I told you not to go to the old Augusta house, 1554 01:16:02,900 --> 01:16:05,150 and off you go, two-timing me with some 1555 01:16:05,200 --> 01:16:08,083 artificially maintained motorcycle mama. 1556 01:16:08,133 --> 01:16:09,483 - I couldn't help it. 1557 01:16:09,533 --> 01:16:10,917 It's my hormones. 1558 01:16:10,967 --> 01:16:11,983 (grunting) 1559 01:16:12,033 --> 01:16:13,600 - How's that for hormones? 1560 01:16:14,567 --> 01:16:16,684 - You were pretty hard on him. 1561 01:16:16,734 --> 01:16:18,684 - Zombie or no zombie, 1562 01:16:18,734 --> 01:16:20,983 wax or no wax, 1563 01:16:21,033 --> 01:16:23,600 nobody two-times me. 1564 01:16:24,567 --> 01:16:26,083 - I'll remember that. 1565 01:16:26,133 --> 01:16:30,150 - Yes, so will I (laughs). 1566 01:16:30,200 --> 01:16:33,216 So, you've been busy, I see. 1567 01:16:33,266 --> 01:16:35,216 - Extremism in the battle to rid the world 1568 01:16:35,266 --> 01:16:38,183 of your infestation is no vice. 1569 01:16:38,233 --> 01:16:43,083 - Oh, my my my, even you hairy ones can wax poetic. 1570 01:16:43,133 --> 01:16:45,917 - You ain't seen nothing yet, lady. 1571 01:16:45,967 --> 01:16:47,166 Ciao, Yvonne. 1572 01:16:48,400 --> 01:16:49,383 (cannon fires) 1573 01:16:49,433 --> 01:16:50,383 - Again. 1574 01:16:50,433 --> 01:16:51,216 (electricity crackles) 1575 01:16:51,266 --> 01:16:52,417 Again. 1576 01:16:52,467 --> 01:16:53,917 (electricity crackles) 1577 01:16:53,967 --> 01:16:56,100 - Running a little short of your precious shavings? 1578 01:16:57,600 --> 01:16:59,183 Take them. 1579 01:16:59,233 --> 01:17:00,834 Now what was that, ciao? 1580 01:17:02,600 --> 01:17:04,700 (laughs) 1581 01:17:06,200 --> 01:17:06,983 (cannon fires) 1582 01:17:07,033 --> 01:17:10,917 (bluegrass music) 1583 01:17:10,967 --> 01:17:13,283 - Dusted them zombies, by cracky. 1584 01:17:13,333 --> 01:17:15,517 - A-yup, shaving grace. 1585 01:17:15,567 --> 01:17:17,517 I told you I caught the breath of 1586 01:17:17,567 --> 01:17:19,650 an evil wind in this town. 1587 01:17:19,700 --> 01:17:21,583 - If it ain't them zombies, it's barnacles. 1588 01:17:21,633 --> 01:17:23,750 Ain't no speed rake gonna loosen 'em up 1589 01:17:23,800 --> 01:17:26,317 when they're that tight on a feller's ass. 1590 01:17:26,367 --> 01:17:28,083 - Explains why these folks walk so damn funny. 1591 01:17:28,133 --> 01:17:29,016 - A-yuh. 1592 01:17:29,066 --> 01:17:33,517 - (laughs) Nice try, Talbot. 1593 01:17:33,567 --> 01:17:36,784 But as usual, you didn't make it to the climax. 1594 01:17:36,834 --> 01:17:38,900 (laughs) 1595 01:17:40,166 --> 01:17:43,750 (upbeat rock music) 1596 01:17:43,800 --> 01:17:45,250 - No brakes! 1597 01:17:45,300 --> 01:17:47,717 - You've been saying that since San Francisco! 1598 01:17:47,767 --> 01:17:50,750 (trolley crashing) 1599 01:17:50,800 --> 01:17:53,633 (wheel squeaking) 1600 01:17:58,500 --> 01:18:00,667 - Feels so strangely unsatisfied. 1601 01:18:01,800 --> 01:18:03,533 - It's the anti-climax, that's all. 1602 01:18:09,000 --> 01:18:11,784 - I'll uh, meet you back in Daneport, Sharon? 1603 01:18:11,834 --> 01:18:12,667 - Perhaps, Mick. 1604 01:18:15,133 --> 01:18:17,633 Now go on, get going before I wax you a bald spot. 1605 01:18:23,400 --> 01:18:24,266 How long, 1606 01:18:26,266 --> 01:18:27,433 how long til people 1607 01:18:28,367 --> 01:18:29,433 listen to us, 1608 01:18:31,000 --> 01:18:33,734 til they understand there's no sin in shaving, 1609 01:18:35,367 --> 01:18:36,800 til they realize the danger? 1610 01:18:38,033 --> 01:18:39,400 - As long as it takes, I guess, 1611 01:18:40,400 --> 01:18:41,600 until they realize 1612 01:18:42,600 --> 01:18:44,850 it's no sin to see a barber. 1613 01:18:44,900 --> 01:18:48,734 (ambulance siren approaching) 1614 01:18:56,266 --> 01:18:58,350 - I'm telling you, there's no one under there. 1615 01:18:58,400 --> 01:19:00,183 There's this cape, 1616 01:19:00,233 --> 01:19:04,216 and this gooey, waxy stuff. 1617 01:19:04,266 --> 01:19:06,617 You sure there was a rider on this bike? 1618 01:19:06,667 --> 01:19:09,983 I mean, maybe the bike was just parked here. 1619 01:19:10,033 --> 01:19:14,150 I mean, she ain't here now, unless she was 1620 01:19:14,200 --> 01:19:16,583 made out of wax or something. 1621 01:19:16,633 --> 01:19:19,400 (engine revving) 1622 01:19:23,066 --> 01:19:25,350 (Yvonne laughs) 1623 01:19:25,400 --> 01:19:29,233 ("Hot Wax Zombies on Wheels") 1624 01:19:33,433 --> 01:19:37,317 ♪ We're wheelin' our bikes everywhere ♪ 1625 01:19:37,367 --> 01:19:41,116 ♪ Comin' to wax off your hair 1626 01:19:41,166 --> 01:19:44,550 ♪ So you all better beware 1627 01:19:44,600 --> 01:19:46,483 ♪ 'Cause we're hot wax zombies 1628 01:19:46,533 --> 01:19:48,517 ♪ We're almost there 1629 01:19:48,567 --> 01:19:52,383 ♪ We're the hot wax zombies on wheels ♪ 1630 01:19:52,433 --> 01:19:56,250 ♪ Hot wax zombies on wheels 1631 01:19:56,300 --> 01:19:59,983 ♪ Hot wax zombies on wheels 1632 01:20:00,033 --> 01:20:03,700 ♪ Hot wax zombies on wheels 1633 01:20:05,700 --> 01:20:07,934 (laughing) 1634 01:20:10,767 --> 01:20:15,383 (adventurous orchestral music) 1635 01:20:15,433 --> 01:20:18,700 (police siren wailing) 1636 01:20:39,300 --> 01:20:40,617 (needle scratching) 1637 01:20:40,667 --> 01:20:43,200 (men laughing) 1638 01:20:44,934 --> 01:20:48,233 (calm orchestral music) 1639 01:20:58,500 --> 01:21:01,016 (needle scratches) 1640 01:21:01,066 --> 01:21:03,467 (rock music) 1641 01:21:10,900 --> 01:21:11,934 - Again, again. 1642 01:21:13,600 --> 01:21:17,917 - (laughs) Running a little short on shavings. 1643 01:21:17,967 --> 01:21:19,150 - Maybe. 1644 01:21:19,200 --> 01:21:19,983 - Pity. 1645 01:21:20,033 --> 01:21:21,183 - Cut. 1646 01:21:21,233 --> 01:21:22,216 Aw, shit. 1647 01:21:22,266 --> 01:21:25,100 (bluegrass music) 1648 01:21:33,567 --> 01:21:35,834 (grunting) 1649 01:21:39,300 --> 01:21:40,517 That was a hit. 1650 01:21:40,567 --> 01:21:42,617 I will now play another hit, though I don't know 1651 01:21:42,667 --> 01:21:44,900 why anybody listens to this mierda. 1652 01:21:47,567 --> 01:21:49,850 - Where is everybody? 1653 01:21:49,900 --> 01:21:51,250 Don't they want to get rid of that 1654 01:21:51,300 --> 01:21:53,467 pesky body hair forever. 1655 01:22:00,500 --> 01:22:01,517 - Damn it. 1656 01:22:01,567 --> 01:22:03,383 (blower whirs) 1657 01:22:03,433 --> 01:22:04,517 Thanks, Sven. 1658 01:22:04,567 --> 01:22:05,950 (crew laughs) 1659 01:22:06,000 --> 01:22:07,717 That ought to keep the couches of Beverly Hills shrinks 1660 01:22:07,767 --> 01:22:09,383 warms for years after this. 1661 01:22:09,433 --> 01:22:11,717 (suspenseful orchestral music) 1662 01:22:11,767 --> 01:22:13,784 - All I need now are some compliant, 1663 01:22:13,834 --> 01:22:17,166 nubile hairless 18-year-old girls to make my life complete. 101354