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1
00:00:09,280 --> 00:00:11,032
? From the long, warm nights
with an ocean breeze
2
00:00:11,120 --> 00:00:14,317
? To the damp and to the rain
of London city
3
00:00:17,120 --> 00:00:19,076
? We come from the sun
to live in the cold
4
00:00:19,160 --> 00:00:22,755
? I miss my rum
I want my coconut tree
5
00:00:24,600 --> 00:00:26,511
? Don't scratch my soca
6
00:00:28,720 --> 00:00:30,517
? Till the party's over
7
00:00:33,240 --> 00:00:35,117
? Let's keep the music sweet
8
00:00:35,200 --> 00:00:38,272
? Wind up your waist and feel the beat
? Don't scratch my soca ?
9
00:00:41,320 --> 00:00:43,072
How's that, Peter?
10
00:00:43,960 --> 00:00:45,712
(Wails)
11
00:00:48,120 --> 00:00:50,350
- What's this?
- (Crying) Mummy!
12
00:00:50,440 --> 00:00:53,238
If I wanted his hair cut like that,
I would have done it myself.
13
00:00:53,320 --> 00:00:55,515
What's wrong with
a good, old-fashioned haircut?
14
00:00:55,600 --> 00:00:57,795
- That's it, it's old-fashioned.
- I don't like it!
15
00:00:57,880 --> 00:01:00,235
- Quiet!
- Yes, shut up.
16
00:01:00,320 --> 00:01:02,914
You told me you wanted
a classic 1940s style.
17
00:01:03,000 --> 00:01:06,595
That's how they was wearing it. I should
know - I'm old enough to remember.
18
00:01:07,520 --> 00:01:12,640
I said I wanted a 1980s version
of a 1940s hairstyle.
19
00:01:12,720 --> 00:01:14,676
I didn't want a bald head!
20
00:01:17,360 --> 00:01:19,316
I suppose a tip is out of the question?
21
00:01:19,400 --> 00:01:22,437
A big boy would never
have let this happen! Look at you!
22
00:01:24,440 --> 00:01:27,557
There was a time when people wanted
a haircut. Now they want it styled.
23
00:01:27,640 --> 00:01:30,279
Well, things change. Fashion take over.
24
00:01:30,360 --> 00:01:33,477
I remember you used to have some
fancy hairstyles yourself, Desmond.
25
00:01:33,560 --> 00:01:36,313
That's because we had style,
didn't we, Porkpie?
26
00:01:36,400 --> 00:01:37,515
Yeah, man.
27
00:01:37,600 --> 00:01:39,955
For a man who claims he had style,
28
00:01:40,040 --> 00:01:43,350
- this place isn't the epitome of it, is it?
- What's wrong with it?
29
00:01:43,440 --> 00:01:47,433
Well, for a start,
the decor is simply appalling.
30
00:01:47,520 --> 00:01:49,590
No colour co-ordination.
31
00:01:49,680 --> 00:01:51,830
- At least it's original.
- You can say that again.
32
00:01:51,920 --> 00:01:55,276
You see that lamp? I was one of
the first people I know to buy that lamp.
33
00:01:55,360 --> 00:01:57,715
Now everybody got one.
34
00:01:57,800 --> 00:02:01,110
Nobody with taste
has a lamp like that these days.
35
00:02:01,200 --> 00:02:03,839
- I do.
- Need I say more?
36
00:02:06,560 --> 00:02:08,915
I must fix this chair. Next!
37
00:02:09,000 --> 00:02:11,070
Nobody wants me
to cut their hair any more.
38
00:02:11,160 --> 00:02:13,594
I better join you, Porkpie,
and take early retirement.
39
00:02:13,680 --> 00:02:16,990
You don't want to do that. You end up
hanging around barber's shops all day.
40
00:02:17,840 --> 00:02:20,593
There you go. I want you
to go to the supermarket for me.
41
00:02:20,680 --> 00:02:23,240
You see what I've been reduced to,
Porkpie? A gofer.
42
00:02:23,320 --> 00:02:25,880
- Gofer?
- Yes, "Go for this, go for that."
43
00:02:25,960 --> 00:02:30,033
- I better go for college.
- What lecture do you have, Matthew?
44
00:02:30,120 --> 00:02:33,874
Is Education A Panacea
To Social Deprivation?
45
00:02:33,960 --> 00:02:35,313
Ooh!
46
00:02:35,400 --> 00:02:37,356
- I better not keep you, then.
- Bye.
47
00:02:37,440 --> 00:02:39,749
Come along, Porkpie. Let's go.
48
00:02:39,840 --> 00:02:42,877
Shirley, what's this? "One tin toms."
49
00:02:42,960 --> 00:02:44,916
- Oh, go on!
- (Laughing)
50
00:02:46,880 --> 00:02:50,270
- Yo, Mum, see you later.
- Yo, Sean.
51
00:02:50,360 --> 00:02:53,318
- Where you think you going?
- To school.
52
00:02:53,400 --> 00:02:56,358
And since when they change
the name of your school
53
00:02:56,440 --> 00:03:00,069
from St Christopher
to Beas Street Posse?
54
00:03:00,160 --> 00:03:03,197
No, no, no, no, Mum.
Beast Street, with a T.
55
00:03:03,280 --> 00:03:05,874
- I haven't got my T yet, though.
- Let me help you.
56
00:03:05,960 --> 00:03:08,520
Here's a sentence that starts with a T.
Take it off.
57
00:03:10,240 --> 00:03:12,834
- Oh, but Mum!
- No buts.
58
00:03:13,960 --> 00:03:15,518
(Muttering)
59
00:03:15,600 --> 00:03:17,750
Here, Sean, like my new top?
Nice, innit? Look.
60
00:03:17,840 --> 00:03:19,796
Yeah, it matches your teeth.
61
00:03:20,640 --> 00:03:24,428
- Boy, he's vexed.
- What is the Beast Street Gang?
62
00:03:24,520 --> 00:03:26,511
It's a gang of kids
that hang on at East Street.
63
00:03:26,600 --> 00:03:29,558
They put the B in front of the name and
call it the Beast Street Posse.
64
00:03:29,640 --> 00:03:31,596
- All right, girls?
- Hello, Lee.
65
00:03:31,680 --> 00:03:34,035
Oh, where is everybody, eh?
66
00:03:34,120 --> 00:03:36,076
Gone shopping.
They're taking early retirement.
67
00:03:36,160 --> 00:03:38,754
Shall I put it on a bit of string
and shove it round your neck
68
00:03:38,840 --> 00:03:40,671
so you don't lose it? Serious.
69
00:03:40,760 --> 00:03:43,718
- All right, what are these, eh?
- Let me guess.
70
00:03:43,800 --> 00:03:46,439
- Erm, earrings?
- Oh, get out.
71
00:03:46,520 --> 00:03:47,873
- Keys.
- Yeah.
72
00:03:47,960 --> 00:03:49,279
- Car keys.
- Yeah.
73
00:03:49,360 --> 00:03:51,669
- Your new car!
- Yeah!
74
00:03:51,760 --> 00:03:54,274
What happened to the old motor,
the Black Man's Wheels?
75
00:03:54,360 --> 00:03:56,316
Black Man's Wheels?
76
00:03:56,400 --> 00:03:58,152
(Both) BMW.
77
00:04:00,520 --> 00:04:03,671
No, it's too conspicuous.
Always getting pulled up by the Old Bill.
78
00:04:03,760 --> 00:04:07,116
- Fancy taking me to school, then?
- Well, I've got no business here, have I?
79
00:04:07,200 --> 00:04:08,713
Come on.
80
00:04:09,680 --> 00:04:12,035
Oh, well, I'll er... be off then, Mum.
See you later.
81
00:04:12,120 --> 00:04:13,951
Sean, what's in the bag?
82
00:04:15,080 --> 00:04:17,036
Er, my PE kit.
83
00:04:17,120 --> 00:04:19,076
- Let me see it.
- What do you want to see it for?
84
00:04:19,160 --> 00:04:21,549
- You've seen it before.
- Go and put that jacket back.
85
00:04:21,640 --> 00:04:22,709
But Mum...
86
00:04:22,800 --> 00:04:24,279
- No buts.
- No buts.
87
00:04:24,360 --> 00:04:26,828
Can I just see Lee's new car first,
please?
88
00:04:38,920 --> 00:04:41,832
- What kind of foolishness is this?
- What you doing, man? Read.
89
00:04:49,000 --> 00:04:50,956
You have a pound?
90
00:04:54,920 --> 00:04:56,876
You put it in there.
91
00:04:58,720 --> 00:05:00,836
And you push it in there.
92
00:05:05,160 --> 00:05:07,116
You never push it in hard enough.
93
00:05:07,200 --> 00:05:09,350
How much harder
you want me to push it?
94
00:05:14,000 --> 00:05:22,000
Ripped By mstoll
95
00:05:30,560 --> 00:05:33,154
�1.29, buy nothing yet.
96
00:05:34,440 --> 00:05:37,398
(Car stereo)
? ... We'll soon be parted... ?
97
00:05:37,480 --> 00:05:40,916
Oh, Lord. I wonder what the police want
with my Gloria and Lee.
98
00:05:41,000 --> 00:05:43,753
Maybe they want to know
the name of the tape Lee playing.
99
00:05:43,840 --> 00:05:46,479
- That is a hard tune.
- Oh, shut up, Porkpie.
100
00:05:47,960 --> 00:05:50,110
? Treat me right... ?
101
00:05:50,200 --> 00:05:53,510
What's going on here?
What are you doing in this car?
102
00:05:53,600 --> 00:05:55,318
What's going on here?
103
00:05:55,400 --> 00:05:59,678
? How can I go on living a lie? ?
104
00:05:59,760 --> 00:06:02,194
What are you doing, man?
This is a private car.
105
00:06:03,800 --> 00:06:06,314
- Where is everybody?
- Gone shopping.
106
00:06:07,160 --> 00:06:09,390
The customers gone with them?
107
00:06:10,320 --> 00:06:12,959
It's Wednesday, Michael.
We're never busy on a Wednesday.
108
00:06:13,040 --> 00:06:16,794
I've been looking at the figures, Mother.
Frankly, every day is Wednesday.
109
00:06:16,880 --> 00:06:19,599
Look, we've got to do something
about our image.
110
00:06:19,680 --> 00:06:21,955
For a start, what is that man
doing on the phone?
111
00:06:22,040 --> 00:06:24,270
Making a phone call.
112
00:06:24,360 --> 00:06:26,669
I know. But he's always there.
113
00:06:26,760 --> 00:06:28,955
That's because none of the phones
round here work.
114
00:06:29,040 --> 00:06:32,191
British Telecom said that nine out of ten
public phones are now working.
115
00:06:32,280 --> 00:06:34,589
Yeah? Well, Peckham's got
the tenth one.
116
00:06:34,680 --> 00:06:37,592
I still maintain that this shop
needs a radical change.
117
00:06:38,520 --> 00:06:40,670
We have to convince Father
to move with the times.
118
00:06:40,760 --> 00:06:43,274
Michael, sit down. Just sit down. Please.
119
00:06:45,200 --> 00:06:49,478
Go easy on your father. You hear?
You know what happens to him
120
00:06:49,560 --> 00:06:52,870
every time you mention
the words "radical" and "change".
121
00:06:52,960 --> 00:06:56,157
He goes a distinct shade of green,
his eyes pops out of his head
122
00:06:56,240 --> 00:06:59,038
- and you two end up arguing.
- Mmm.
123
00:06:59,120 --> 00:07:03,033
Look, he's been running this shop
his own way for more than 20 years.
124
00:07:03,120 --> 00:07:05,554
- Huh, well...
- We've never made a great profit.
125
00:07:05,640 --> 00:07:09,679
But we've never made a loss
and none of our children have gone without.
126
00:07:12,000 --> 00:07:14,195
I'm proud of you, Michael.
127
00:07:14,280 --> 00:07:16,510
I'm also proud of your father.
128
00:07:16,600 --> 00:07:20,752
So just hold back the revolution, yeah?
And let's do things gradually.
129
00:07:20,840 --> 00:07:24,310
And when the shop is yours,
you can revolt to your heart's content.
130
00:07:26,520 --> 00:07:29,193
- Gradually.
- Gradually.
131
00:07:29,280 --> 00:07:31,430
Yeah, fine.
132
00:07:31,520 --> 00:07:34,114
What are you doing back here now?
The banks close?
133
00:07:34,200 --> 00:07:37,112
Lunch break. I just popped in
to see Father about the accounts.
134
00:07:37,200 --> 00:07:39,156
Oh, you want something to eat?
135
00:07:39,240 --> 00:07:42,789
Listen, I got some stew
and some banana fritters.
136
00:07:42,880 --> 00:07:44,836
I've... I've eaten, Mother.
137
00:07:44,920 --> 00:07:47,718
So you eat already?
My food isn't good enough for you?
138
00:07:47,800 --> 00:07:50,268
It's not that, Mother.
It's just that every time I come in
139
00:07:50,360 --> 00:07:52,351
you try to shove something in my mouth.
140
00:07:52,440 --> 00:07:55,796
I don't know anyone who likes the sound
of his own voice like my eldest son.
141
00:07:55,880 --> 00:07:58,030
Hello, Father.
142
00:07:58,120 --> 00:08:01,078
- What kept you?
- The police almost kept us.
143
00:08:01,160 --> 00:08:04,550
- Porkpie, take them bags upstairs.
- What happen?
144
00:08:04,640 --> 00:08:07,791
Well, they wanted to see Lee's
particulars but everything was in order.
145
00:08:07,880 --> 00:08:10,110
- We seen everything, didn't we?
- Yeah, man.
146
00:08:10,200 --> 00:08:12,794
You see, he was driving along
and suddenly...
147
00:08:12,880 --> 00:08:15,314
Yeah, yeah. OK.
Desmond, mind the shop.
148
00:08:16,360 --> 00:08:17,554
But I...
149
00:08:18,160 --> 00:08:20,958
- Hi, Desmond, what happening?
- Hi, Burt.
150
00:08:22,000 --> 00:08:25,037
Right... how you want your hair cut?
151
00:08:25,120 --> 00:08:28,829
It's all right, I'll wait for Shirley...
thank you.
152
00:08:28,920 --> 00:08:30,876
- You want a haircut?
- Yes, yes.
153
00:08:30,960 --> 00:08:32,916
Well, that's what I'm giving you, a haircut.
154
00:08:33,000 --> 00:08:34,558
- Dad, that's...
- Shut up.
155
00:08:34,640 --> 00:08:36,596
I've come to get my hair coiffured.
156
00:08:36,680 --> 00:08:38,955
Look, this is Desmond's barber shop.
157
00:08:39,040 --> 00:08:43,431
If you want your hair cut, stay.
If you want it coiffured, coiff off.
158
00:08:43,520 --> 00:08:46,080
- Look, I didn't come here to be insulted.
- Why not?
159
00:08:46,160 --> 00:08:48,674
- You didn't come to get your hair cut.
- Hah! Haircut?
160
00:08:48,760 --> 00:08:50,512
What do you know about a haircut?
161
00:08:50,600 --> 00:08:53,637
You wouldn't know a good one
if it poke you in the eye.
162
00:08:53,720 --> 00:08:55,950
- Gentlemen, pl...
- Shut up!
163
00:08:56,040 --> 00:08:58,110
- Who are you, anyway?
- I'm his partner.
164
00:08:58,200 --> 00:09:00,714
You mean he got someone
stupid enough to be a partner?
165
00:09:01,560 --> 00:09:03,994
- What do you mean, "stupid enough"?
- Get out of my shop.
166
00:09:04,080 --> 00:09:06,310
Yes, come out! I mean no! I...
167
00:09:07,520 --> 00:09:10,876
- Don't worry. I am going!
- But I... It's... But...
168
00:09:10,960 --> 00:09:12,518
- Now look what you've done.
- Me?
169
00:09:12,600 --> 00:09:16,195
Our only customer and you forced him out.
This is no way to run a business.
170
00:09:16,280 --> 00:09:18,316
Since when do you tell me
how to run my business?
171
00:09:18,400 --> 00:09:19,674
Since I became a partner.
172
00:09:19,760 --> 00:09:21,876
And started telling me
how to run my business!
173
00:09:21,960 --> 00:09:24,269
Because we can be more efficient
and I'm here to do that.
174
00:09:24,360 --> 00:09:28,399
Tonight I will show you my business plan.
It's called A New Step Forward.
175
00:09:28,480 --> 00:09:31,392
I suppose A New Step Forward
means me taking one step backward.
176
00:09:31,480 --> 00:09:33,436
No! Not really.
177
00:09:33,520 --> 00:09:35,192
Just... sideways.
178
00:09:35,280 --> 00:09:37,236
- (Shirley) Gradually.
- Gradually.
179
00:09:42,720 --> 00:09:44,676
Right, I've looked at the accounts
180
00:09:44,760 --> 00:09:47,513
and profits haven't been too steady
since 1980.
181
00:09:47,600 --> 00:09:49,955
There was a sharp increase
between '84 and '85,
182
00:09:50,040 --> 00:09:51,996
but I don't know why.
183
00:09:52,080 --> 00:09:54,275
That's when the doctor told him
to give up drinking
184
00:09:54,360 --> 00:09:58,319
- because of his blood pressure.
- So then what happened after '85?
185
00:09:58,400 --> 00:10:00,789
He stopped going to the doctor.
186
00:10:00,880 --> 00:10:02,950
Them doctors is all the same.
187
00:10:03,040 --> 00:10:06,032
You tell them you got a sore throat,
they tell you you got a sore foot
188
00:10:06,120 --> 00:10:08,588
and give you a prescription
for high blood pressure.
189
00:10:09,480 --> 00:10:11,232
I went to my doctor about my migraine...
190
00:10:11,320 --> 00:10:14,392
(Posh accent) Oh, migraine.
Isn't that a middle-class headache?
191
00:10:15,760 --> 00:10:19,070
Since I've become partner
we've started to become more organised.
192
00:10:19,160 --> 00:10:22,869
The accounts are up to date, the shop's
well stocked and we're also in the black.
193
00:10:22,960 --> 00:10:24,916
- Now, what...
- Look, get to the point.
194
00:10:25,000 --> 00:10:27,719
- I'm fed up of all this Tory talk.
- Yes, man, get on with it.
195
00:10:27,800 --> 00:10:30,951
- What does all this mean?
- Give him a chance.
196
00:10:31,040 --> 00:10:34,077
- Go on, son.
- Thank you, Mother.
197
00:10:35,000 --> 00:10:37,992
Now, all this means that
A, you should stop drinking
198
00:10:38,080 --> 00:10:39,638
and B, we need a new stylist.
199
00:10:39,720 --> 00:10:43,952
Ah, now I know what A New Step
Forward means - step on Desmond.
200
00:10:44,040 --> 00:10:48,352
No, dear. No, no.
Nobody's trying to get rid of you.
201
00:10:48,440 --> 00:10:52,228
What Michael is suggesting is that
we get someone in to work with you.
202
00:10:52,320 --> 00:10:53,719
No.
203
00:10:53,800 --> 00:10:55,870
- Beside you?
- Well, I...
204
00:10:55,960 --> 00:10:57,916
- Under you.
- Ah, well, yes.
205
00:10:58,800 --> 00:11:00,756
Where do we find this new junior?
206
00:11:00,840 --> 00:11:03,070
His name's Tony
and he's the best in town.
207
00:11:03,160 --> 00:11:05,674
- Well, he would be.
- We have to speculate to accumulate.
208
00:11:05,760 --> 00:11:08,957
Look, he'll bring enough custom with him
to pay for himself.
209
00:11:09,040 --> 00:11:11,190
Look at that smile.
210
00:11:11,280 --> 00:11:13,111
I don't trust that smile.
211
00:11:13,200 --> 00:11:15,589
He's up to something.
212
00:11:17,280 --> 00:11:19,953
Hey, Michael, who's Elizabeth Reilly?
213
00:11:20,040 --> 00:11:22,349
And Sophie Thomas?
And Brenda Jenkins?
214
00:11:22,440 --> 00:11:25,193
Er, just some business clients.
Leave that alone, Sean.
215
00:11:28,520 --> 00:11:32,229
They tell me I can't cut hair,
that I need a new stylist.
216
00:11:32,320 --> 00:11:36,108
Matthew, when I finish with your hair
I'm going to make them eat their words.
217
00:11:36,200 --> 00:11:38,634
What are you going to do with my hair?
218
00:11:38,720 --> 00:11:42,315
- There's no need to take it so personal.
- I'm not taking it personally.
219
00:11:42,400 --> 00:11:45,995
- What are you going to do with my hair?
- Keep your head still.
220
00:11:46,080 --> 00:11:49,436
The new stylist studied for five years
at a top academy.
221
00:11:49,520 --> 00:11:51,112
What's five years at a top academy
222
00:11:51,200 --> 00:11:53,156
compared with 25 years
in at the sharp end?
223
00:11:53,240 --> 00:11:55,913
Yes, but what are you going to do
with my hair?
224
00:11:56,000 --> 00:11:59,675
Matthew, when I'm finished with your hair
you going to be the talk of the town.
225
00:11:59,760 --> 00:12:03,036
Ah! But I think
I've got to catch a plane for Africa.
226
00:12:05,120 --> 00:12:09,033
Father, may I take this opportunity
to introduce you to Tony?
227
00:12:14,560 --> 00:12:15,675
Hi.
228
00:12:16,640 --> 00:12:18,119
(Both chuckling)
229
00:12:18,055 --> 00:12:20,125
100-proof pure rum.
230
00:12:21,015 --> 00:12:23,973
Guaranteed to kill all household germs...
231
00:12:25,775 --> 00:12:27,094
...dead.
232
00:12:27,175 --> 00:12:29,370
That's if it don't kill you first.
233
00:12:29,455 --> 00:12:31,366
(Laughing)
234
00:12:31,455 --> 00:12:34,367
Shh! Everybody's sleeping upstairs.
235
00:12:36,655 --> 00:12:38,725
Yes, man, you tell me that, we know that.
236
00:12:38,815 --> 00:12:40,771
Just thought I'd tell you again.
237
00:12:42,015 --> 00:12:44,575
Give me some of that rum
so me don't forget.
238
00:12:46,375 --> 00:12:49,606
Hey... Tony coming tomorrow.
239
00:12:49,695 --> 00:12:52,732
- Who... who's coming?
- I told you already who he is.
240
00:12:54,295 --> 00:12:56,251
Man, hold that.
241
00:12:57,415 --> 00:13:00,168
A-a-a-ah! The white boy.
242
00:13:00,255 --> 00:13:03,327
Yes, my new stylist.
243
00:13:03,415 --> 00:13:06,407
They're gonna use him
to try and force me to retire.
244
00:13:06,495 --> 00:13:10,170
- But I thought you wanted to retire.
- I do, but in me own time.
245
00:13:10,255 --> 00:13:13,611
Well, you better hurry up
because you don't have much more time.
246
00:13:13,695 --> 00:13:15,970
Whose side are you on?
247
00:13:16,055 --> 00:13:19,365
Tell me something.
If you don't want him to come,
248
00:13:19,455 --> 00:13:21,332
why don't you tell him to go?
249
00:13:21,415 --> 00:13:23,292
Because the family want him to stay.
250
00:13:23,375 --> 00:13:27,254
- So why don't you tell them to go?
- Because he'll still be here.
251
00:13:27,335 --> 00:13:30,213
So why don't you and him go together?
252
00:13:31,455 --> 00:13:33,525
Well, because... What?
253
00:13:33,615 --> 00:13:36,413
Man, look, give me the rum.
You drink too much already.
254
00:13:37,695 --> 00:13:39,492
(Sighs)
255
00:13:46,135 --> 00:13:48,888
Aaah. Why?
256
00:13:50,015 --> 00:13:52,449
These are rootless times
we live in, Porkpie.
257
00:13:56,615 --> 00:14:00,324
Even me chair let me down.
I'll go fix it once and for all.
258
00:14:08,175 --> 00:14:10,564
Give me something to jam it with.
259
00:14:12,975 --> 00:14:14,727
Give me a domino.
260
00:14:14,815 --> 00:14:18,251
Can't use my domino for that.
This is a high-quality set, you know.
261
00:14:18,335 --> 00:14:20,690
- Porkpie.
- (Sighs)
262
00:14:29,375 --> 00:14:31,331
(Yelps)
263
00:14:31,415 --> 00:14:33,212
Ow-ow!
264
00:14:33,295 --> 00:14:35,968
Me cutting hand!
265
00:14:36,055 --> 00:14:39,047
Well, guess it's a good thing
Tony coming tomorrow.
266
00:14:40,775 --> 00:14:43,812
Porkpie... get out of me shop.
267
00:14:45,335 --> 00:14:48,486
- Didn't you think he was tasty, Mum?
- Who was tasty?
268
00:14:48,575 --> 00:14:51,169
Trendy Tony, of course.
269
00:14:51,255 --> 00:14:54,611
Trendy? You call him trendy
with all them holes in his trousers?
270
00:14:55,575 --> 00:14:58,965
His mother must be ashamed of him
walking down the street looking like that.
271
00:14:59,055 --> 00:15:01,933
People pay a lot of money
for them to look like that, you know.
272
00:15:02,015 --> 00:15:04,575
Oh, so I'm wasting my time
mending Sean's trousers.
273
00:15:04,655 --> 00:15:08,011
All right, ladies? Listen, Shirl,
I got a lovely little number for you.
274
00:15:08,095 --> 00:15:11,405
- You'll like this, Glor.
- You know my rules about dodgy gear.
275
00:15:11,495 --> 00:15:15,124
- "Off the back of a lorry, like."
- "Sweet as a nut. Know what I mean?"
276
00:15:15,215 --> 00:15:18,013
I know all about the rules.
Don't worry. This stuff's sweet.
277
00:15:18,095 --> 00:15:20,609
Listen, right? Wafer-thin credit card,
278
00:15:20,695 --> 00:15:25,291
solar, I repeat, solar-powered pocket
calculators. I'll show you how it works.
279
00:15:25,375 --> 00:15:27,331
Don't you have to be outside
for that to work?
280
00:15:27,415 --> 00:15:29,087
No, they work indoors, as well.
281
00:15:30,455 --> 00:15:33,606
Just... need a bit of sunlight, that's all.
282
00:15:34,975 --> 00:15:38,604
You don't want to buy one, do you?
Be useful when you go back to Guyana.
283
00:15:38,695 --> 00:15:40,253
I'd better be off. See you.
284
00:15:40,335 --> 00:15:42,644
Matthew will 'ave one.
He'll take them back to Africa.
285
00:15:42,735 --> 00:15:44,930
They got the climate.
What a touch, eh? Cor.
286
00:15:54,375 --> 00:15:56,172
Sean?
287
00:15:58,535 --> 00:16:00,571
- What?
- What's this?
288
00:16:00,655 --> 00:16:03,010
That is a racoon's tail, Mum.
289
00:16:03,095 --> 00:16:07,054
- That.
- Ah. That's the Beast Street emblem.
290
00:16:07,135 --> 00:16:09,126
- It's a knife.
- I know it's a knife.
291
00:16:09,215 --> 00:16:11,285
But we don't use it as a knife-knife.
292
00:16:11,375 --> 00:16:14,014
Well, what you use this knife-knife for?
293
00:16:14,095 --> 00:16:16,051
Nothing. We just wear it.
294
00:16:16,135 --> 00:16:18,524
It represents a sting in our tail.
You know what I mean?
295
00:16:18,615 --> 00:16:23,291
Oh, in that case you don't mind if this
queen bee take away the sting in the tail.
296
00:16:24,415 --> 00:16:26,531
- Mum, you can't do that!
- Watch me.
297
00:16:26,615 --> 00:16:30,528
I need it. Today's the day
I'm gonna earn my T in Beast Street.
298
00:16:30,615 --> 00:16:34,528
Well, I don't care
if you go earn your X, Y and your Z.
299
00:16:34,615 --> 00:16:36,685
But you are not... Watch my lips.
300
00:16:36,775 --> 00:16:39,209
You are not leaving this house
carrying this knife.
301
00:16:39,295 --> 00:16:43,493
Uh-oh. What d'you have to do
to earn this T, anyway?
302
00:16:43,575 --> 00:16:45,531
Never mind.
303
00:16:47,415 --> 00:16:49,371
(Groans)
304
00:16:50,775 --> 00:16:52,811
What happened to your hand?
305
00:16:53,775 --> 00:16:56,164
- Nothing.
- The other hand.
306
00:16:56,255 --> 00:16:58,211
Oh, that hand.
307
00:16:59,735 --> 00:17:03,045
- I ran into a lamp post.
- You were drunk.
308
00:17:03,135 --> 00:17:05,729
No, I wasn't drunk, I was... mellow.
309
00:17:05,815 --> 00:17:10,252
Yeah, well, you gonna be "mellow"
because you can't cut hair.
310
00:17:10,335 --> 00:17:12,291
It's a good job Tony coming.
311
00:17:12,375 --> 00:17:15,173
I better go downstairs and open the shop.
312
00:17:15,255 --> 00:17:17,723
- (Sean hollers) Bye, Mum.
- Bye, Sean.
313
00:17:17,815 --> 00:17:21,171
- Put the jacket back.
- Oh, but Mum...
314
00:17:21,255 --> 00:17:22,210
No buts.
315
00:17:23,135 --> 00:17:26,445
This is your chair. It's been giving us
a bit of trouble recently.
316
00:17:26,535 --> 00:17:28,969
- What wrong with the chair?
- Well, it jams now and then.
317
00:17:29,055 --> 00:17:31,808
- If it's jammed I'll use your chair.
- Ah. Rule number one.
318
00:17:31,895 --> 00:17:34,807
Nobody uses my chair. It's my chair.
That's why I use it.
319
00:17:34,895 --> 00:17:37,284
- You can use my chair.
- No, he can't use your chair.
320
00:17:37,375 --> 00:17:39,331
- Why not?
- Because it's your chair.
321
00:17:39,415 --> 00:17:41,690
Don't be silly.
Of course he can use my chair for now.
322
00:17:41,775 --> 00:17:44,448
No, no. Look, it's all right.
I'll use this one.
323
00:17:44,535 --> 00:17:47,174
Right. Your clippers and scissors
are over there.
324
00:17:50,975 --> 00:17:54,490
- I told you he was cool.
- He's really nice.
325
00:17:54,575 --> 00:17:58,170
Mmm. But men like that
aren't to be trusted.
326
00:17:58,255 --> 00:18:00,644
They use their good looks
to walk all over women.
327
00:18:00,735 --> 00:18:04,614
- He can walk all over me any old time.
- Yeah, me too.
328
00:18:05,535 --> 00:18:08,208
- You like some tea?
- (Matthew, Porkpie) Yes please, Shirl.
329
00:18:08,295 --> 00:18:10,729
- Yes, please, Shirl.
- Mum, we'll make Tony's tea.
330
00:18:10,815 --> 00:18:12,885
No, you won't. You're going to school.
331
00:18:12,975 --> 00:18:14,966
- You take sugar?
- Yes please, Shirl.
332
00:18:16,095 --> 00:18:18,325
- No thanks, Shirl.
- Ooh, sweet enough, eh?
333
00:18:18,415 --> 00:18:21,487
- We'll see you later on then, Tony.
- After school, Tony.
334
00:18:21,575 --> 00:18:24,043
No, you won't. Now go to school.
Tony's here to work.
335
00:18:25,935 --> 00:18:28,813
Here y'are.
I've got something for you, Des.
336
00:18:28,895 --> 00:18:31,045
My name is Des-mond.
337
00:18:32,615 --> 00:18:34,571
Sorry, Des-mond.
338
00:18:37,095 --> 00:18:40,246
Right... name that tune.
339
00:18:40,335 --> 00:18:42,371
- (? Laid-back intro)
- Java Jive.
340
00:18:42,455 --> 00:18:43,774
- Yeah.
- The Ink Spots?
341
00:18:43,855 --> 00:18:47,370
- Recorded 1950... something.
- Ha-ha!
342
00:18:47,455 --> 00:18:49,411
How do you know we play these games?
343
00:18:49,495 --> 00:18:51,406
Ah, Michael told me.
344
00:18:51,495 --> 00:18:54,407
I got a jazz and blues collection,
Des... mond.
345
00:18:54,495 --> 00:18:56,929
- Also got some rare grooves.
- Rare grooves?
346
00:18:57,015 --> 00:18:58,892
You know, old-time stylee.
347
00:18:58,975 --> 00:19:02,047
Well, maybe we might get along after all.
348
00:19:03,735 --> 00:19:06,249
Right, then. The first customer, please.
349
00:19:17,295 --> 00:19:20,571
Well done, Tony. I'm sure this is
the start of a fruitful relationship.
350
00:19:20,655 --> 00:19:22,486
- Cheers, man.
- Don't you agree, Father?
351
00:19:22,575 --> 00:19:26,488
All right, Shirley, I'll see you tomorrow.
Des... mond. Gloria.
352
00:19:26,575 --> 00:19:29,043
- I'll see you all tomorrow.
- Bye-bye, Tony.
353
00:19:30,655 --> 00:19:32,771
Takings were up by 50%,
354
00:19:32,855 --> 00:19:35,574
which means that if we continue
at this current rate of growth
355
00:19:35,655 --> 00:19:37,964
there should be healthy profit
at the end of the year.
356
00:19:38,055 --> 00:19:41,206
- It also proves my theory that we...
- Needed a junior.
357
00:19:45,255 --> 00:19:48,008
Try working with him
rather than against him, Father.
358
00:19:57,615 --> 00:20:01,688
Give it a try, Desmond.
If it doesn't work out we'll ask him to go.
359
00:20:01,775 --> 00:20:04,084
Oh, listen, Dad, I still love you.
360
00:20:04,175 --> 00:20:06,291
Even though Tony is more handsome.
361
00:20:08,615 --> 00:20:11,175
- D'you want a hand?
- No, I'll be up in a minute, darling.
362
00:20:11,255 --> 00:20:13,086
All right.
363
00:20:18,375 --> 00:20:20,331
(Laughs)
364
00:20:21,455 --> 00:20:26,813
If profits continue to grow
I'll soon be able to build a house brand new!
365
00:20:31,655 --> 00:20:34,692
- Here, Des, look what I found.
- Well said, Pops.
366
00:20:36,895 --> 00:20:40,410
I found him rapping at the top of his voice
in the middle of the High Road.
367
00:20:40,495 --> 00:20:42,770
Thought I'd bring him home
before the Old Bill does.
368
00:20:42,855 --> 00:20:45,085
- Oh, thanks, Lee.
- I'll see you later, all right?
369
00:20:45,175 --> 00:20:47,405
Look at you, making a fool of the family.
370
00:20:47,495 --> 00:20:49,326
Hi, Dad.
371
00:20:49,415 --> 00:20:52,771
I know I'm a little bit drunk,
but don't get mad at me.
372
00:20:52,855 --> 00:20:56,848
- Because you do it all the time.
- Yes. But I'm over 18
373
00:20:56,935 --> 00:21:00,007
and not legally responsible to anybody.
I can do what I like.
374
00:21:00,095 --> 00:21:02,165
Yeah, man, you're well over 18, guy.
375
00:21:02,255 --> 00:21:06,407
Don't be feisty. I've got a good mind
to box you, you're still a little boy.
376
00:21:08,175 --> 00:21:10,131
What have you got to say for yourself?
377
00:21:11,135 --> 00:21:14,411
Wasn't my fault, Dad.
They didn't give me the T.
378
00:21:14,495 --> 00:21:18,932
Even though I drank the three cans
of super-tea you have to drink to get your T,
379
00:21:19,015 --> 00:21:22,325
they still didn't give it to me
because I wasn't wearing the racoon's tail.
380
00:21:22,415 --> 00:21:24,565
Can you believe it?
381
00:21:24,655 --> 00:21:27,294
So you know what I told them
they can do with their T?
382
00:21:27,375 --> 00:21:29,764
- They can stick it...
- On the racoon again.
383
00:21:32,775 --> 00:21:35,573
I mean, what have you got to do
to get a T?
384
00:21:35,655 --> 00:21:38,089
What's so important about a T?
385
00:21:38,175 --> 00:21:41,963
Dad, if I had the T, it meant
I was a member of the Beast Street Posse.
386
00:21:42,055 --> 00:21:44,205
To get the B, you have to be bad.
387
00:21:44,295 --> 00:21:46,729
All that means is you walk around
and look tough all day.
388
00:21:46,815 --> 00:21:50,251
E, easy rider.
You do a few tricks on a BMX.
389
00:21:50,335 --> 00:21:52,803
A is for Aikido. S is for sex.
390
00:21:52,895 --> 00:21:55,125
You didn't, did you?
391
00:21:55,215 --> 00:21:57,649
No, we just lie about it.
Everyone else does.
392
00:21:59,495 --> 00:22:02,805
And after all that, Dad,
they still wouldn't let me join.
393
00:22:03,895 --> 00:22:07,205
Well, if it's any consolation to you,
394
00:22:07,295 --> 00:22:10,605
the same thing happened to me
when I was just a little older than you.
395
00:22:11,535 --> 00:22:14,891
Some friends of mine were setting up
a band in Georgetown.
396
00:22:14,975 --> 00:22:17,887
Well, to join the band
you had to have your own instrument.
397
00:22:17,975 --> 00:22:21,524
Well, I know they wanted a trumpeter
and I was the baddest trumpeter in town.
398
00:22:21,615 --> 00:22:23,810
Jazzy D, they used to call me.
399
00:22:24,655 --> 00:22:28,773
So I work hard and save up my money
and I buy me own trumpet.
400
00:22:29,735 --> 00:22:32,408
So I went round to
where the guys were rehearsing.
401
00:22:32,495 --> 00:22:35,328
And they still wouldn't let me join.
402
00:22:35,415 --> 00:22:37,246
And you know why?
403
00:22:37,335 --> 00:22:42,170
Because they needed a new trumpet
and I had a second-hand trumpet.
404
00:22:42,255 --> 00:22:46,533
So I... left them
and I formed my own band.
405
00:22:46,615 --> 00:22:50,051
(Chuckles) You don't need
the Beast Street Posse, man.
406
00:22:50,135 --> 00:22:53,047
Form your own posse.
Blow your own trumpet.
407
00:22:54,415 --> 00:22:57,293
- You're dread, Dad.
- Me know.33970
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