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1
00:00:03,000 --> 00:00:04,270
-Anything for the post
office?
-Here.
2
00:00:04,300 --> 00:00:06,150
Miss Babcock's
corporate tax
returns
3
00:00:06,183 --> 00:00:07,373
must be postmarked
by the 15th
4
00:00:07,400 --> 00:00:10,660
or she'll face
substantial
penalties.
5
00:00:10,100 --> 00:00:13,380
-Today's the 16th, Niles.
-What's your point?
6
00:00:15,383 --> 00:00:17,273
Would you mail
this letter to Lenny?
7
00:00:17,300 --> 00:00:20,130
You know, I can't
believe
you're still writing
to your first-grade pen
8
00:00:20,166 --> 00:00:22,416
Why? Val wrote to hers
for a long time
9
00:00:22,450 --> 00:00:24,270
until eventually he lost
his appeal.
10
00:00:24,300 --> 00:00:26,100
She got tired of
writing him, huh?
11
00:00:26,133 --> 00:00:28,103
No. He lost his appeal.
12
00:00:29,450 --> 00:00:31,320
They fried him
at Leavenworth.
13
00:00:32,283 --> 00:00:33,433
Here you go.
14
00:00:33,466 --> 00:00:35,246
Miss Fine,
this is an Easter
Seal.
15
00:00:35,283 --> 00:00:38,133
-Oh, they don't look.
-Oh.
16
00:00:38,166 --> 00:00:41,376
FRAN: Ugh, something
smells rotten in here.
17
00:00:41,416 --> 00:00:43,276
Or dead under the house.
18
00:00:43,316 --> 00:00:46,366
Or... Maggie,
I love your new
perfume.
19
00:00:47,466 --> 00:00:50,156
She's trying to attract
a guy.
20
00:00:50,500 --> 00:00:51,300
Who, the Orkin Man?
21
00:00:51,333 --> 00:00:55,163
Now, Brighton,
be nice to your sister.
22
00:00:59,250 --> 00:01:02,130
Thank God
my new girlfriend
doesn't smell like that.
23
00:01:02,166 --> 00:01:05,416
Oh, does she fold out
and thumbtack to the wall
like the last one?
24
00:01:07,216 --> 00:01:09,296
Well, I think
it's just fabulous.
25
00:01:09,333 --> 00:01:11,303
Now even you'll be
married before me.
26
00:01:11,333 --> 00:01:14,323
Who is this little tramp
that's after
your father's money?
27
00:01:15,483 --> 00:01:17,123
Well, her name's Veronica.
28
00:01:17,150 --> 00:01:18,270
I leave notes for her
in third period,
29
00:01:18,300 --> 00:01:19,380
she leaves them
for me in fourth.
30
00:01:19,416 --> 00:01:21,426
We've had no physical contact
whatsoever.
31
00:01:21,466 --> 00:01:24,416
Well, it's working
for Michael and Lisa Marie.
32
00:01:27,200 --> 00:01:29,230
[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]
33
00:01:29,266 --> 00:01:32,176
SINGER:♪♪ She was workingin a bridal shopin Flushing, Queens ♪♪
34
00:01:32,216 --> 00:01:33,416
♪♪ 'Til her boyfriendkicked her out ♪♪
35
00:01:33,450 --> 00:01:35,270
♪♪ In one of thosecrushing scenes ♪♪
36
00:01:35,300 --> 00:01:37,200
♪♪ What was she to do?Where was she to go? ♪♪
37
00:01:37,233 --> 00:01:40,283
♪♪ She was out on her fanny ♪♪
38
00:01:40,316 --> 00:01:43,116
♪♪ So over the bridgefrom Flushingto the Sheffield'sdoor ♪♪
39
00:01:43,150 --> 00:01:45,480
♪♪ She was thereto sell makeup,but the father saw more♪♪
40
00:01:46,160 --> 00:01:47,470
♪♪ She had style!She had flair!She was there! ♪♪
41
00:01:48,000 --> 00:01:51,330
♪♪ That's howshe became the nanny!♪♪
42
00:01:51,366 --> 00:01:54,176
♪♪ Who would have guessed
that the girl we've described ♪♪
43
00:01:54,216 --> 00:01:56,416
♪♪ Was just exactly whatthe doctor prescribed? ♪♪
44
00:01:56,450 --> 00:01:58,180
♪♪ Now the fatherfinds her beguiling ♪♪
45
00:01:58,216 --> 00:01:59,396
♪♪ Watch out, C.C.! ♪♪
46
00:01:59,433 --> 00:02:01,003
♪♪ And the kidsare actuallysmiling ♪♪
47
00:02:01,330 --> 00:02:03,500
♪♪ Such♪♪
48
00:02:03,830 --> 00:02:07,420
♪♪ She's the lady in redwhen everybody elseis wearing tan ♪♪
49
00:02:07,450 --> 00:02:10,100
♪♪ The flashy girlfrom Flushing ♪♪
50
00:02:10,133 --> 00:02:12,453
♪♪ The nanny named Fran! ♪♪
51
00:02:14,316 --> 00:02:17,216
[TV PLAYING]
52
00:02:19,116 --> 00:02:21,196
Oh, Autumn, what are you
doing?
53
00:02:21,233 --> 00:02:23,423
You're throwing
your life away.
54
00:02:23,450 --> 00:02:27,330
And for what?
Thatschmendrick
55
00:02:27,660 --> 00:02:29,000
Oh, this isn't even my soap.
56
00:02:33,183 --> 00:02:36,323
Oh, Summer, what are you doing?
57
00:02:38,133 --> 00:02:40,433
Throwing your life away.
58
00:02:41,400 --> 00:02:44,120
Oh, Nanny Fine.
59
00:02:44,150 --> 00:02:46,230
How can you watch
those soaps?
60
00:02:46,266 --> 00:02:48,346
-[SHUSHING]
-The plots are so ridi...
61
00:02:48,383 --> 00:02:50,103
what's going on?
62
00:02:50,133 --> 00:02:53,333
Well, she is hopelessly in
love
with her business partner,
63
00:02:53,366 --> 00:02:56,166
only he doesn't
even know she
exists.
64
00:02:56,200 --> 00:02:57,450
What a loser.
65
00:03:01,100 --> 00:03:02,330
Hello, Maxwell.
66
00:03:04,660 --> 00:03:05,300
Maxwell!
67
00:03:05,333 --> 00:03:08,233
Oh, I'm sorry, C.C.
I didn't notice you there.
68
00:03:09,366 --> 00:03:11,326
So what's gonna happen?
Is she going to get this guy
69
00:03:11,366 --> 00:03:14,416
or bash his British head in
or what?
70
00:03:14,450 --> 00:03:17,420
Well, he asked her
to work late
tonight,
71
00:03:17,450 --> 00:03:20,180
and she's going
to
seduce him.
72
00:03:20,216 --> 00:03:22,246
So we'll find out
what happens tomorrow?
73
00:03:22,283 --> 00:03:23,403
Tomorrow?
74
00:03:23,433 --> 00:03:25,503
This is a soap.
75
00:03:25,830 --> 00:03:26,370
We'll be lucky if
six months from now
76
00:03:26,400 --> 00:03:29,330
that coffee she's
making
is ready.
77
00:03:31,160 --> 00:03:33,430
Oh, C.C., what are you doing
Saturday night?
78
00:03:33,466 --> 00:03:36,476
Oh, my cousin Gee Gee
needs a transfusion,
79
00:03:37,160 --> 00:03:40,500
and my blood type
is the...why?
80
00:03:41,200 --> 00:03:43,450
Never mind. I just thought
we could do some work,
81
00:03:43,483 --> 00:03:47,153
-but under the circumstances,
with your cousin...
-Oh, what's the rush?
82
00:03:47,183 --> 00:03:50,333
I mean, they gave
her
six months.
83
00:03:51,216 --> 00:03:54,446
You know, if she were Jewish,
her last name would be
Iceberg.
84
00:03:56,330 --> 00:03:57,300
Oh, lookee here.
85
00:03:57,333 --> 00:04:00,223
Another letter from that
pen pal of yours.
86
00:04:00,250 --> 00:04:03,220
Do I detect a strong,
hideous cologne?
87
00:04:03,250 --> 00:04:06,230
Yeah, your daughter just left.
88
00:04:06,266 --> 00:04:09,266
But on the bright
side,
no more silverfish.
89
00:04:12,300 --> 00:04:15,150
Oh, Lenny.
90
00:04:15,183 --> 00:04:16,433
[EXCLAIMING]
91
00:04:16,466 --> 00:04:19,196
-Oh, stop doing that.
-What?
92
00:04:19,233 --> 00:04:21,123
Whenever you get
a letter from Lenny,
93
00:04:21,150 --> 00:04:23,120
you make that
ridiculous grin.
94
00:04:23,150 --> 00:04:24,400
No, I don't.
95
00:04:26,183 --> 00:04:29,253
You know, you never did tell me
what this Lenny chap looks like.
96
00:04:29,283 --> 00:04:30,473
Oh, I have no idea.
97
00:04:31,000 --> 00:04:33,830
We vowed never
to exchange photographs,
98
00:04:33,116 --> 00:04:34,996
which is probably
why he stood by me
99
00:04:35,330 --> 00:04:37,230
through my fatal attraction
with Ben and Jerry.
100
00:04:38,316 --> 00:04:41,996
Yes. I've seen those
pictures at your mother's.
101
00:04:42,483 --> 00:04:46,833
Listen, Mr. Smarty Feldman,
102
00:04:46,116 --> 00:04:49,266
he who wore a plaid skirt
to his high school
graduation
103
00:04:49,300 --> 00:04:50,470
should not throw stones.
104
00:04:51,000 --> 00:04:52,270
It was a kilt.
105
00:04:52,300 --> 00:04:54,830
You say potato.
106
00:04:55,500 --> 00:04:57,370
Oh, no, I'm nauseous!
107
00:04:57,400 --> 00:05:00,250
What, Lenny broke
the no-photo rule?
108
00:05:00,283 --> 00:05:02,433
No. He's coming
to New York,
109
00:05:02,466 --> 00:05:07,166
and he wants
to meet me for dinner
at the Russian Tea Room.
110
00:05:07,200 --> 00:05:09,130
The Russian Tea Rooms
are bad because waiters
111
00:05:09,166 --> 00:05:12,196
dressed as Cossacks
give you the creeps? What?
112
00:05:12,233 --> 00:05:15,323
No. I'm afraid to meet
Lenny because, well...
113
00:05:15,350 --> 00:05:20,220
Over the years,
I might have
stretched
the truth a little
114
00:05:20,250 --> 00:05:21,320
For instance?
115
00:05:21,350 --> 00:05:22,470
Oh, things.
116
00:05:24,150 --> 00:05:27,330
[STAR-SPANGLED BANNER PLAYING]
117
00:05:29,216 --> 00:05:32,396
Oh, cheer up, FloJo.
Silver goes with everything.
118
00:05:35,133 --> 00:05:37,183
Are you out of your mind?
119
00:05:37,216 --> 00:05:38,466
What, no good?
120
00:05:39,000 --> 00:05:41,230
You wouldn't believe
I'm the fastest
woman
on Earth?
121
00:05:41,266 --> 00:05:43,226
In that outfit I would.
122
00:05:45,483 --> 00:05:48,103
You like?
123
00:05:48,133 --> 00:05:49,353
'Cause I did kind
of
tell him
124
00:05:49,383 --> 00:05:54,153
that I was also a little
more
popular than I am.
125
00:05:55,500 --> 00:05:57,270
[AUDIENCE APPLAUDING]
126
00:05:58,200 --> 00:05:59,450
Yes, sir!
127
00:06:01,150 --> 00:06:03,350
-You know...
-Oh, what a great audience.
128
00:06:03,383 --> 00:06:04,323
Thank you!
129
00:06:04,350 --> 00:06:06,270
You know, to me...
130
00:06:06,300 --> 00:06:08,200
To me nothing says
debutante
131
00:06:08,233 --> 00:06:10,373
like a leopard-skin
cocktail dress.
132
00:06:12,316 --> 00:06:14,246
What, no Oprah?
133
00:06:14,283 --> 00:06:16,123
I don't do daytime.
134
00:06:17,366 --> 00:06:21,226
Miss Fine, whatever possessed
you to make up all these
things?
135
00:06:21,266 --> 00:06:23,496
What is it you're always
telling the children?
136
00:06:23,830 --> 00:06:26,160
Don't wear white
shoes
after Labor Day?
137
00:06:26,500 --> 00:06:28,270
All right, what is it I'm
always
telling the children?
138
00:06:28,300 --> 00:06:32,370
Miss Fine works too
hard.
We should send her
to Club Med.
139
00:06:32,400 --> 00:06:34,330
No. To tell the truth.
140
00:06:34,366 --> 00:06:37,366
Oy, I think I told him
I was on that show,
too.
141
00:06:38,300 --> 00:06:40,500
Oh, mayday, Fran.
142
00:06:40,830 --> 00:06:41,400
Veronica stayed after
school
so she could meet me.
143
00:06:41,433 --> 00:06:43,503
And that's
it.
It's over.
144
00:06:43,830 --> 00:06:44,280
Oh, what happened?
145
00:06:44,316 --> 00:06:46,366
Well, I wrote to
her
and told her I
look
146
00:06:46,400 --> 00:06:47,480
and I don't.
147
00:06:49,400 --> 00:06:52,220
B, you made up some
cock-and-bull story
148
00:06:52,250 --> 00:06:54,420
just to make yourself
seem better?
149
00:06:54,450 --> 00:06:57,130
I'm so surprised at you.
150
00:06:59,266 --> 00:07:03,346
What? I said I was
surprised at him.
151
00:07:04,333 --> 00:07:06,403
I had to lie to Lenny.
152
00:07:06,433 --> 00:07:09,663
A guy like that's not
gonna
be interested in me
153
00:07:09,100 --> 00:07:11,480
without the
Olympics,
Letterman, and...
154
00:07:12,160 --> 00:07:13,170
my career.
155
00:07:13,200 --> 00:07:15,330
You told him
you were a nanny?
156
00:07:15,660 --> 00:07:16,230
Close.
157
00:07:18,116 --> 00:07:22,466
[THEME FROM 2001:
A SPACE ODYSSEY PLAYING]
158
00:07:41,830 --> 00:07:44,000
Houston, we have a problem.
159
00:07:55,216 --> 00:07:58,096
Oh, Niles, I thought I
might
as well give Miss Fine
160
00:07:58,133 --> 00:07:59,383
a lift to the Tea Rooms.
161
00:07:59,416 --> 00:08:02,326
I'm going out anyway.
Got to drop by my...
162
00:08:02,366 --> 00:08:05,366
My, um, attorney's.
163
00:08:05,400 --> 00:08:08,400
Your attorney is nowhere near
the Russian Tea Room.
164
00:08:08,433 --> 00:08:10,203
Then I'll get a new one.
165
00:08:12,400 --> 00:08:14,470
Same place I'll
get
a butler.
166
00:08:17,283 --> 00:08:18,453
Admit it, sir.
167
00:08:18,483 --> 00:08:21,833
You're dying to get a look
at this Leonard fellow.
168
00:08:21,116 --> 00:08:25,296
Oh, Niles, as usual, you
are
way off the mark.
169
00:08:25,333 --> 00:08:28,173
Do you think he still
has
all his hair?
170
00:08:28,200 --> 00:08:29,480
Oh, no, sir.
171
00:08:30,160 --> 00:08:32,120
You're the fairest
of them all.
172
00:08:35,116 --> 00:08:36,466
Where is Miss Fine anyway?
173
00:08:37,000 --> 00:08:39,420
Oh, she's upstairs
getting allfarpitzed.
174
00:08:39,450 --> 00:08:41,370
What does that mean?
175
00:08:41,400 --> 00:08:42,450
You know, dressed.
176
00:08:42,483 --> 00:08:44,473
I thought
that was
farblondzhet.
177
00:08:45,000 --> 00:08:46,470
No, sir,
that means confused.
178
00:08:47,383 --> 00:08:49,273
No, man, that'sfarkatke.
179
00:08:50,266 --> 00:08:52,266
Well, then,
what'sfarshimmelt?
180
00:08:54,330 --> 00:08:56,330
I think
that's her
uncle.
181
00:09:01,250 --> 00:09:05,370
Oh, Miss Fine,
you look beautiful.
182
00:09:05,400 --> 00:09:08,430
Oh, yeah,
but I'm all
farshvitzt.
183
00:09:12,216 --> 00:09:15,166
Oh, what am I so
afraid of anyway?
184
00:09:15,200 --> 00:09:18,350
So I told Lenny
that I'm a little
more
sophisticated
185
00:09:18,383 --> 00:09:20,833
than I really am.
186
00:09:20,116 --> 00:09:23,156
Oh, God. Please let
that be an eyelash.
187
00:09:26,350 --> 00:09:28,180
Yeah, it was.
188
00:09:29,483 --> 00:09:31,003
Tell me the truth.
189
00:09:31,330 --> 00:09:33,220
If you were
expecting
Grace Kelly,
190
00:09:33,250 --> 00:09:36,220
and I showed up,
you wouldn't be
disappointed,
right?
191
00:09:36,250 --> 00:09:38,270
-Literally Grace Kelly?
-Yeah.
192
00:09:38,300 --> 00:09:39,380
Well, yes.
193
00:09:41,283 --> 00:09:44,133
I believe youfarkatked
194
00:09:45,116 --> 00:09:47,166
FRAN: Oh, forget
it.
I'm not going.
195
00:09:47,200 --> 00:09:50,100
Oh, Miss Fine, what, so for
the next 20 years,
196
00:09:50,133 --> 00:09:52,383
I have to hear about this
wonderful man you never met?
197
00:09:52,416 --> 00:09:54,326
You are going.
198
00:09:54,366 --> 00:09:55,376
As a matter of fact...
199
00:09:55,416 --> 00:09:56,466
You're going to take her
yourself.
200
00:09:57,000 --> 00:09:58,170
I'm going to take you myself...
201
00:09:58,200 --> 00:09:59,480
Even though it's
nowhere
near your attorney.
202
00:10:00,160 --> 00:10:02,250
Even though it's
nowhere
near my...
203
00:10:05,300 --> 00:10:08,280
Anyway, you're going
to
meet this Lenny fellow
face to face
204
00:10:08,316 --> 00:10:10,416
so you can see that he
is
no better than I am.
205
00:10:10,450 --> 00:10:13,380
-You are.
-Would you please?
206
00:10:14,366 --> 00:10:15,366
You are.
207
00:10:15,400 --> 00:10:17,330
All right, let's go.
208
00:10:17,660 --> 00:10:18,150
Wait, wait.
209
00:10:18,183 --> 00:10:21,103
Oh, I know. I'll tell him
I couldn't come,
210
00:10:21,133 --> 00:10:23,203
because Miss America
could not fulfill her
duties
211
00:10:23,233 --> 00:10:25,453
and I had to jump in.
That's good, that's
good.
212
00:10:25,483 --> 00:10:29,163
No, you wrote that to him
in your last letter.
213
00:10:32,166 --> 00:10:34,396
A million Rosa Lopezes
in the world,
214
00:10:34,433 --> 00:10:38,003
and we got to end up
with a domestic with
total recall.
215
00:10:42,830 --> 00:10:43,450
Hello, hello.
216
00:10:43,483 --> 00:10:45,223
Ready to work?
217
00:10:45,250 --> 00:10:46,370
Maxwell?
218
00:10:46,400 --> 00:10:49,130
I'll be back in a
while,
C.C.
219
00:10:50,500 --> 00:10:51,270
Can you start without me?
220
00:10:54,200 --> 00:10:56,420
She can, and she has.
221
00:11:02,133 --> 00:11:04,163
Come along, Miss Fine.
222
00:11:04,500 --> 00:11:06,350
There's no reason
to be so
trepidatious.
223
00:11:06,383 --> 00:11:09,323
Well, I can't help it.
I'm nervous.
224
00:11:11,660 --> 00:11:14,230
Oh, what if he's not as
accepting of me as you are?
225
00:11:14,266 --> 00:11:17,246
I mean, you've seen me
at my absolute worst.
226
00:11:17,283 --> 00:11:19,163
Yes, I have.
227
00:11:20,500 --> 00:11:21,100
When?
228
00:11:21,133 --> 00:11:22,473
No, I just mean
your
absolute worst
229
00:11:23,000 --> 00:11:25,100
is absolutely lovely.
230
00:11:26,350 --> 00:11:29,330
You know, there's a
pooper-scooper law in this
city.
231
00:11:29,366 --> 00:11:31,496
Come along.
232
00:11:31,830 --> 00:11:33,300
Oh, I'm going. I'm going.
233
00:11:33,333 --> 00:11:35,383
Quit pushing. Quit pushing.
234
00:11:35,416 --> 00:11:37,326
Oh, Mr. Sheffield!
235
00:11:48,366 --> 00:11:51,116
Oh, Mr. Sheffield, it's very
sweet of you
236
00:11:51,150 --> 00:11:54,180
to sit with me until Lenny
comes, but it isn't necessary.
237
00:11:54,216 --> 00:11:56,376
I'm a grown woman. I can
handle myself.
238
00:12:01,000 --> 00:12:02,450
Hello, girl sweet as pudding.
239
00:12:06,166 --> 00:12:09,116
Uh, you know, my wife
was pissed,
240
00:12:09,150 --> 00:12:12,500
but I felt trapped
in my old body.
241
00:12:18,333 --> 00:12:22,153
Forget it, Miss Fine.
I'm not going
anywhere.
242
00:12:22,183 --> 00:12:24,353
Would you care
for an
aperitif?
243
00:12:24,383 --> 00:12:27,373
No, I'll just do a little
before-dinner drink.
244
00:12:29,660 --> 00:12:30,420
Two champagne cocktails,
please.
245
00:12:30,450 --> 00:12:32,200
Oh, Mr. Sheffield.
246
00:12:32,233 --> 00:12:36,333
Buying drinks, how classy.
247
00:12:36,660 --> 00:12:38,180
Boy, me and Val usually just
sit
at the bar
248
00:12:38,216 --> 00:12:40,246
and wait for the guys
next to us to go
to the bathroom,
249
00:12:40,283 --> 00:12:42,233
and then we take theirs.
250
00:12:42,266 --> 00:12:44,226
You'd drink someone
else's
drink?
251
00:12:44,266 --> 00:12:47,266
No! We just hold it.
252
00:12:47,300 --> 00:12:48,380
Well, you got to have a drink
253
00:12:48,416 --> 00:12:51,276
to get into the free
happy-hour buffet.
254
00:12:51,316 --> 00:12:53,996
Don't you ever go out?
255
00:12:54,330 --> 00:12:55,230
Actually, I'll have you know
256
00:12:55,266 --> 00:12:58,266
I was quite the
Jack-the-lad in my
day.
257
00:12:59,266 --> 00:13:01,116
Oh, well, that's okay.
258
00:13:01,150 --> 00:13:04,400
Everybody goes through
a curiosity phase.
259
00:13:04,433 --> 00:13:05,423
Oh, thanks.
260
00:13:05,450 --> 00:13:08,150
Ah, just in time.
261
00:13:12,330 --> 00:13:15,120
Oh, I don't know why
I'm so worried about
meeting Lenny anyway.
262
00:13:15,150 --> 00:13:17,250
I mean, at least I'm not
that broad over there.
263
00:13:17,283 --> 00:13:19,183
Would you look at her?
264
00:13:20,300 --> 00:13:22,430
Desperate look in her eyes,
265
00:13:22,466 --> 00:13:24,366
boozing it up.
266
00:13:35,400 --> 00:13:38,480
Oh, my God! It's me!
267
00:14:03,660 --> 00:14:05,350
Maxwell,
darling,
is that you?
268
00:14:09,133 --> 00:14:12,353
Shh. Don't turn around.
269
00:14:22,350 --> 00:14:24,250
I'm yours.
270
00:14:27,160 --> 00:14:29,300
Tell me what you want me
to do.
271
00:14:35,366 --> 00:14:37,996
[WHISPERING] Cluck
like a chicken.
272
00:14:46,000 --> 00:14:47,380
What?
273
00:14:47,416 --> 00:14:50,326
It turns me on.
274
00:14:55,316 --> 00:14:59,376
[IMITATING HEN CLUCKING]
275
00:15:15,483 --> 00:15:18,103
[SCREAMING]
276
00:15:23,166 --> 00:15:25,266
Mr. Sheffield's been delayed.
277
00:15:25,300 --> 00:15:27,330
Did you think I was him?
278
00:15:29,466 --> 00:15:32,146
If you tell
anyone about this...
279
00:15:32,183 --> 00:15:34,303
Oh, I'd never do that.
280
00:15:34,333 --> 00:15:36,333
We need the eggs.
281
00:15:43,283 --> 00:15:46,203
Oh, I'll tell you,
I feel so out of place here.
282
00:15:46,233 --> 00:15:48,103
I can't remember
the last time
283
00:15:48,133 --> 00:15:51,103
I sat on a barstool
waiting to meet a guy.
284
00:15:51,133 --> 00:15:53,473
I thought you went
out
last night with Val.
285
00:15:54,000 --> 00:15:55,420
Oh, yeah. That's when
it was.
286
00:15:58,333 --> 00:16:01,353
Oh, would you look at those
two
chippies over there
287
00:16:01,383 --> 00:16:04,503
checking you out?
288
00:16:04,830 --> 00:16:06,250
You know, Mr. Sheffield,
you're not tied to me.
289
00:16:06,283 --> 00:16:09,163
I mean, if you want
to work the room...
290
00:16:10,830 --> 00:16:12,230
No. If I get up, you
might
take my drink.
291
00:16:14,216 --> 00:16:16,326
Touche.
292
00:16:16,660 --> 00:16:18,270
You are sosuave bola.
293
00:16:19,350 --> 00:16:23,150
I bet you got some sure-fire
pickup lines.
294
00:16:23,183 --> 00:16:24,473
Well, the first one's simply,
295
00:16:25,000 --> 00:16:27,230
"Maxwell Sheffield,
Broadway producer."
296
00:16:28,266 --> 00:16:30,156
What's the second one?
297
00:16:30,500 --> 00:16:31,320
"How do you like your eggs?"
298
00:16:31,350 --> 00:16:34,160
[EXCLAIMING]
299
00:16:34,500 --> 00:16:36,330
Mr. Sheffield!
300
00:16:37,350 --> 00:16:39,370
I wonder what's keeping Lenny.
301
00:16:39,400 --> 00:16:41,450
Lenny who? Oh.
302
00:16:42,450 --> 00:16:43,470
He's half-an-hour late.
303
00:16:44,000 --> 00:16:45,420
The suspense must be
killing you.
304
00:16:45,450 --> 00:16:47,280
Huh? Oh, I'm sorry.
305
00:16:47,316 --> 00:16:49,426
I was just thinking how nice
it is to get out,
306
00:16:49,466 --> 00:16:51,266
you know, without the kids.
307
00:16:51,300 --> 00:16:55,430
Maybe it's time we thought
about hiring someone
to take care of...oh.
308
00:16:58,100 --> 00:16:59,200
Yes, Miss Fine,
309
00:16:59,233 --> 00:17:01,433
I've often thought of
hiring a nanny myself.
310
00:17:01,466 --> 00:17:05,326
[LAUGHING]
311
00:17:05,366 --> 00:17:10,116
Oh, you know, Mr. Sheffield,
I have a little confession
to make.
312
00:17:10,150 --> 00:17:12,200
I'm having such a great time
just sitting here with you,
313
00:17:12,233 --> 00:17:15,173
I don't even care
if Lenny is a no-show.
314
00:17:16,216 --> 00:17:17,346
There he is,
315
00:17:17,383 --> 00:17:20,503
and he's gorgeous.
Go home.
316
00:17:21,233 --> 00:17:23,373
Wait. Miss Fine, how do you
even
know that's him?
317
00:17:23,400 --> 00:17:27,220
Well, we both agreed
to wear a red rose.
318
00:17:28,183 --> 00:17:30,003
He's turning around.
319
00:17:30,330 --> 00:17:32,130
Boy, coming and
going,
it's still good.
320
00:17:33,150 --> 00:17:34,170
Well, I suppose he's all right,
321
00:17:34,200 --> 00:17:36,660
if you go for that dark,
Mediterranean,
322
00:17:36,100 --> 00:17:38,430
well-muscled-from-the-docks
type.
323
00:17:39,416 --> 00:17:41,266
What, are you jealous?
324
00:17:41,300 --> 00:17:43,330
Well, I admit, I wish I could
lift a crate
325
00:17:43,366 --> 00:17:45,196
of rear-projection
television sets,
326
00:17:45,233 --> 00:17:49,103
but unfortunately, I have to
hire people to do that.
327
00:17:51,266 --> 00:17:53,446
Hi, it's me!
328
00:17:53,483 --> 00:17:55,103
Hi.
329
00:17:55,133 --> 00:17:56,233
Well, don't be shy.
330
00:17:56,266 --> 00:17:58,266
Give me a kiss.
331
00:18:03,160 --> 00:18:04,330
Maxwell Sheffield.
332
00:18:05,400 --> 00:18:07,220
David Stavros.
333
00:18:07,250 --> 00:18:09,130
Who?
334
00:18:09,166 --> 00:18:10,996
You're not Lenny?
335
00:18:11,330 --> 00:18:13,450
Well, what are you
wearing
a red rose for?
336
00:18:13,483 --> 00:18:15,403
I'm with the band.
337
00:18:18,500 --> 00:18:20,280
You have some hell
of a nerve!
338
00:18:20,316 --> 00:18:23,176
Now, kiss me goodnight
and get out of here.
339
00:18:24,316 --> 00:18:26,996
Uh, Miss Fine!
340
00:18:27,330 --> 00:18:29,250
Oh, all right.
341
00:18:29,283 --> 00:18:32,663
Here. Jot your number
down on this napkin.
342
00:18:32,100 --> 00:18:33,420
Now get lost.
343
00:18:35,200 --> 00:18:38,830
What do you say?
You want to give this Lenny
another half-an-hour?
344
00:18:38,116 --> 00:18:40,146
Oh, no way.
The guy stood me up.
345
00:18:40,183 --> 00:18:42,833
Boy, you'd think that he
would
want to meet
346
00:18:42,116 --> 00:18:46,126
the first millionaire
woman
astronaut who opened
for Streisand.
347
00:18:47,233 --> 00:18:49,153
Perhaps your
letters
intimidated him.
348
00:18:49,183 --> 00:18:52,203
Yeah, well, if he can't
handle a strong woman...
349
00:18:52,233 --> 00:18:54,283
Excuse me, ma'am.
This was left for
you.
350
00:18:54,316 --> 00:18:55,466
Oh.
351
00:18:57,183 --> 00:18:59,253
Oh, it's from Lenny.
352
00:18:59,283 --> 00:19:03,003
"Dear Fran, this
is
my last letter.
353
00:19:03,330 --> 00:19:07,250
When I came in and saw you
with that great-looking
guy,
354
00:19:07,283 --> 00:19:12,223
I knew I could
never
compete with him."
355
00:19:12,250 --> 00:19:15,370
Oh, Miss Fine,
I--I feel terrible.
356
00:19:15,400 --> 00:19:16,470
You?
357
00:19:17,000 --> 00:19:19,300
What were the odds
of Lenny walking in
358
00:19:19,333 --> 00:19:23,003
just when I was in the
arms
of David?
359
00:19:32,160 --> 00:19:35,320
Niles, I don't make it a
habit
of drinking with the
help.
360
00:19:35,350 --> 00:19:38,500
I've never been
any help to you.
361
00:19:39,333 --> 00:19:41,133
Exactly.
362
00:19:48,400 --> 00:19:51,120
So, tell me, Rochester,
363
00:19:52,316 --> 00:19:56,826
what did you do to kill a
day
before I came along?
364
00:19:56,116 --> 00:19:59,316
Well, truth be told, my life
was a little empty.
365
00:20:00,283 --> 00:20:02,423
But now I have a hobby.
366
00:20:06,116 --> 00:20:08,246
I loathe you.
367
00:20:09,216 --> 00:20:11,326
I despise you.
368
00:20:11,366 --> 00:20:12,366
Servant.
369
00:20:12,400 --> 00:20:14,120
Trollop.
370
00:20:15,233 --> 00:20:17,283
Bellboy.
371
00:20:17,316 --> 00:20:19,296
Brunette.
372
00:20:42,100 --> 00:20:44,370
Good night, Maxwell,
Fanny Nine.
373
00:20:49,150 --> 00:20:50,430
Swine.
374
00:20:50,466 --> 00:20:52,226
Chicken.
375
00:20:58,250 --> 00:21:00,120
Good night, people.
376
00:21:02,330 --> 00:21:05,350
Miss Fine, how much did I
have
to drink this evening?
377
00:21:05,383 --> 00:21:08,303
Not as much as them.
378
00:21:08,333 --> 00:21:10,353
I suppose when two people
spend as much time
379
00:21:10,383 --> 00:21:12,103
around each other
as those two,
380
00:21:12,133 --> 00:21:14,253
something like this
is bound to happen.
381
00:21:14,283 --> 00:21:17,403
Yeah, I suppose it's inevitable.
382
00:21:21,660 --> 00:21:22,300
Are you...
383
00:21:22,333 --> 00:21:25,303
are you thinking
what I'm
thinking?
384
00:21:25,333 --> 00:21:27,303
What are you thinking?
385
00:21:29,116 --> 00:21:31,216
I'm thinking about...
386
00:21:33,183 --> 00:21:36,133
taking a shower
and going to
bed.
387
00:21:39,216 --> 00:21:40,426
What a coincidence.
388
00:21:40,466 --> 00:21:44,416
I'm going to bed thinking
about you taking a shower.
389
00:21:44,450 --> 00:21:47,220
[♪♪♪]
390
00:21:53,660 --> 00:21:57,150
[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]
27081
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