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1
00:01:10,765 --> 00:01:13,159
(speaking Latin)
2
00:01:15,553 --> 00:01:16,597
(girl) Hello!
3
00:01:17,337 --> 00:01:18,904
English, please.
4
00:01:18,947 --> 00:01:21,733
I'm surrounded by idiots.
5
00:01:21,776 --> 00:01:23,517
That girl is a lot.
6
00:01:23,561 --> 00:01:24,562
(loud thud)
7
00:01:27,521 --> 00:01:28,566
(gasps)
8
00:01:28,609 --> 00:01:30,133
(rattling)
9
00:01:32,004 --> 00:01:33,310
(crackling)
10
00:01:36,008 --> 00:01:39,272
I told you, Pugsley.
It's push, not pull.
11
00:01:39,316 --> 00:01:40,621
Hello, everyone!
12
00:01:41,361 --> 00:01:42,536
I can't believe
13
00:01:42,580 --> 00:01:44,799
parents let their
children go out like this.
14
00:01:44,843 --> 00:01:47,715
They're all so clean,
15
00:01:47,759 --> 00:01:49,152
shiny.
16
00:01:49,195 --> 00:01:50,979
GOMEZ: Oh, it's
not all bad, my dear.
17
00:01:51,023 --> 00:01:52,764
At least they pit the
children against each other
18
00:01:52,807 --> 00:01:54,200
in a competition
19
00:01:54,244 --> 00:01:56,637
that will inevitably
scar the losers forever.
20
00:01:56,681 --> 00:01:59,988
Behold! The gift of Prometheus!
21
00:02:03,688 --> 00:02:04,819
(both cheering)
22
00:02:05,603 --> 00:02:06,343
Ugh.
23
00:02:07,082 --> 00:02:08,345
Step aside, kid.
24
00:02:08,388 --> 00:02:09,824
I'll show you how it's done.
25
00:02:11,217 --> 00:02:12,175
(grunts)
26
00:02:13,219 --> 00:02:14,264
-(chuckles)
-(girl) What?
27
00:02:14,307 --> 00:02:16,179
-(continues
grunting) -(girls gasp)
28
00:02:17,310 --> 00:02:19,356
WEDNESDAY: Ladies and gentlemen.
29
00:02:20,444 --> 00:02:23,055
Come on, come on.
Wednesday is next.
30
00:02:23,098 --> 00:02:25,710
Have you ever found
yourself discontented
31
00:02:25,753 --> 00:02:27,451
by those closest to you?
32
00:02:27,494 --> 00:02:30,062
Are you irked by their inability
33
00:02:30,105 --> 00:02:33,108
to heed simple requests?
34
00:02:33,152 --> 00:02:37,069
Such as, "Please don't
come to my science fair."
35
00:02:37,112 --> 00:02:39,158
(chuckling) She's
talking about us.
36
00:02:40,681 --> 00:02:42,161
WEDNESDAY: Do you
ever wish you could take
37
00:02:42,205 --> 00:02:43,989
their undesirable qualities
38
00:02:44,032 --> 00:02:46,861
and eliminate them forever?
39
00:02:46,905 --> 00:02:49,037
It can be done.
40
00:02:49,081 --> 00:02:51,779
Meet my Uncle Fester.
41
00:02:51,823 --> 00:02:53,041
Hello!
42
00:02:53,085 --> 00:02:54,956
-(screams)
-(man gags)
43
00:02:55,000 --> 00:02:56,523
-(body thuds)
-That's my brother.
44
00:02:56,567 --> 00:02:58,133
Observe.
45
00:02:59,309 --> 00:03:00,658
Hmm.
46
00:03:00,701 --> 00:03:01,789
(sniffs)
47
00:03:01,833 --> 00:03:03,617
-(rattles)
-Mm.
48
00:03:04,531 --> 00:03:05,576
(grunts)
49
00:03:05,619 --> 00:03:07,404
(chomping)
50
00:03:07,447 --> 00:03:08,492
(burps)
51
00:03:08,535 --> 00:03:09,928
-(all groan)
-(woman) Come on!
52
00:03:09,971 --> 00:03:11,973
Stomach-turning, isn't it?
53
00:03:12,017 --> 00:03:13,627
In stark contrast, however,
54
00:03:14,715 --> 00:03:16,456
is Socrates.
55
00:03:17,762 --> 00:03:19,720
(all) Aw.
56
00:03:19,764 --> 00:03:21,722
Psst! Are you gonna eat that?
57
00:03:21,766 --> 00:03:24,638
This led me to
ponder the question,
58
00:03:24,682 --> 00:03:28,120
what if personality
traits could be extracted
59
00:03:28,163 --> 00:03:30,470
and implanted between creatures?
60
00:03:32,820 --> 00:03:33,952
(liquid sloshes)
61
00:03:40,045 --> 00:03:41,438
Bottoms up.
62
00:03:43,048 --> 00:03:44,876
Mmm. (smacks lips)
63
00:03:44,919 --> 00:03:45,920
Ooh.
64
00:03:50,055 --> 00:03:51,056
(bell dings)
65
00:03:53,319 --> 00:03:54,668
(crowd applauding)
66
00:03:56,975 --> 00:03:59,325
(chuckles) Yay! All right!
Thank you, thank you.
67
00:03:59,369 --> 00:04:00,413
What happened?
68
00:04:00,892 --> 00:04:02,197
(crunching)
69
00:04:02,241 --> 00:04:04,591
(laughs) Is there
a single person
70
00:04:04,635 --> 00:04:06,289
in the history of the world
71
00:04:06,332 --> 00:04:08,291
who's made more
of a breakthrough?
72
00:04:08,334 --> 00:04:10,815
She's an enfant terrible.
73
00:04:10,858 --> 00:04:13,774
With the focus on terrible.
74
00:04:13,818 --> 00:04:18,953
Cara mia,you know
what French does to me.
75
00:04:18,997 --> 00:04:23,567
(announcer) And now, the
moment you've all been waiting for.
76
00:04:23,610 --> 00:04:25,917
Here to present the
awards at this year's
77
00:04:25,960 --> 00:04:28,223
Strange Foundation
National Science Fair,
78
00:04:28,267 --> 00:04:29,834
is the brilliant innovator
79
00:04:29,877 --> 00:04:34,491
and the namesake of our
foundation, Cyrus Strange.
80
00:04:34,534 --> 00:04:36,319
(laughing)
81
00:04:36,362 --> 00:04:38,582
Hello, everyone.
82
00:04:38,625 --> 00:04:39,931
Oh!
83
00:04:39,974 --> 00:04:42,150
(glitches slightly) I'm
so honored to be here.
84
00:04:42,194 --> 00:04:45,153
But, well, I'm not
actually there, I'm...
85
00:04:45,197 --> 00:04:46,894
-here!(laughing)
-(people gasp)
86
00:04:47,765 --> 00:04:49,201
Well, you get it.
87
00:04:49,244 --> 00:04:51,203
Welcome to this
year's science fair.
88
00:04:51,246 --> 00:04:52,552
I'm excited to honor this group
89
00:04:52,596 --> 00:04:54,598
of brilliant minds
we have before us.
90
00:04:54,641 --> 00:04:56,382
(glitching) Let's proceed.
91
00:04:56,426 --> 00:04:58,602
(announcer) And the winner is...
92
00:04:58,645 --> 00:04:59,994
-Good luck.
-(chuckles)
93
00:05:01,431 --> 00:05:03,737
Oh. You were serious.
94
00:05:05,348 --> 00:05:07,654
(announcer) Everyone
who participated.
95
00:05:07,698 --> 00:05:09,917
-What?
-(announcer) That's right.
96
00:05:09,961 --> 00:05:13,007
This year, we are
embracing a new philosophy.
97
00:05:13,051 --> 00:05:15,532
Just trying makes you a winner.
98
00:05:15,575 --> 00:05:18,883
But how can you be a
winner if no one is a loser?
99
00:05:18,926 --> 00:05:21,755
(announcer) Every single
one of you is special.
100
00:05:21,799 --> 00:05:22,974
Disagree.
101
00:05:23,017 --> 00:05:24,018
He's not special.
102
00:05:24,062 --> 00:05:26,369
Did you see his volcano?
103
00:05:26,412 --> 00:05:28,414
What was that? Baking soda?
104
00:05:28,458 --> 00:05:29,981
Is this the third grade?
105
00:05:30,024 --> 00:05:32,070
It does not count!
106
00:05:32,113 --> 00:05:33,680
Don't you get it?
107
00:05:33,724 --> 00:05:36,640
-Ugh.
-I get it, Wednesday.
108
00:05:36,683 --> 00:05:37,989
I watched your presentation.
109
00:05:38,032 --> 00:05:40,034
It was brilliant.
110
00:05:40,078 --> 00:05:42,036
Yes, I'm aware of that.
111
00:05:42,080 --> 00:05:43,821
I see a kindred spirit in you.
112
00:05:43,864 --> 00:05:46,650
Mm-hmm. The
makings of a great mind.
113
00:05:46,693 --> 00:05:49,130
If you'd like to share
your research with me,
114
00:05:49,174 --> 00:05:51,394
I could develop it
further in my lab.
115
00:05:51,437 --> 00:05:53,221
Imagine what would happen
116
00:05:53,265 --> 00:05:56,573
if we combined your data
with the proper resources?
117
00:05:56,616 --> 00:05:59,358
Alas, I can't share any of that.
118
00:05:59,402 --> 00:06:00,838
It's a family secret.
119
00:06:00,881 --> 00:06:02,622
I see.
120
00:06:02,666 --> 00:06:05,103
And which family is yours?
121
00:06:05,146 --> 00:06:06,147
Fire in the hole!
122
00:06:06,191 --> 00:06:07,148
♫ "Welcome to the
Madhouse" playing ♫
123
00:06:07,192 --> 00:06:08,062
♫ Welcome to the madhouse ♫
124
00:06:08,106 --> 00:06:09,194
Oh.
125
00:06:09,237 --> 00:06:10,587
(screaming)
126
00:06:10,630 --> 00:06:12,458
Pretty hot, eh, ladies?
127
00:06:13,067 --> 00:06:15,026
Nice job, Romeo.
128
00:06:15,069 --> 00:06:16,636
♫ Welcome to the madhouse ♫
129
00:06:18,725 --> 00:06:21,902
♫ Where they all
come back For more ♫
130
00:06:21,946 --> 00:06:23,426
♫ Welcome to the madhouse ♫
131
00:06:25,036 --> 00:06:27,821
Morticia, my queen,
132
00:06:27,865 --> 00:06:29,693
you inflame me.
133
00:06:29,736 --> 00:06:33,044
I feel liquid magma
lapping at my body.
134
00:06:33,087 --> 00:06:34,828
You're on fire, dear.
135
00:06:34,872 --> 00:06:36,613
Ha! So I am!
136
00:06:38,092 --> 00:06:39,746
(dance-pop music resumes)
137
00:06:39,790 --> 00:06:41,444
My condolences.
138
00:06:43,576 --> 00:06:44,664
(Fester laughing)
139
00:06:44,708 --> 00:06:47,275
♫ Welcome to the madhouse ♫
140
00:06:49,321 --> 00:06:51,715
(theme music playing)
141
00:06:55,283 --> 00:06:56,502
(thunder crashing)
142
00:07:02,500 --> 00:07:05,000
Improved Captions by Sailor420
142
00:07:05,000 --> 00:07:07,500
!!! Hope you enjoy the film !!!
142
00:07:16,174 --> 00:07:19,482
Great thinkers need
obstacles to function.
143
00:07:19,525 --> 00:07:21,875
Yet, with every
meaningless trophy,
144
00:07:21,919 --> 00:07:25,662
I become more and
more unremarkable.
145
00:07:25,705 --> 00:07:30,362
And with every hug,
more brain cells erode.
146
00:07:30,405 --> 00:07:33,626
But, like the phoenix
from the ashes,
147
00:07:33,670 --> 00:07:36,324
I shall rise above this setback.
148
00:07:37,630 --> 00:07:41,068
Together, we shall
turn heads, Socrates.
149
00:07:42,374 --> 00:07:44,811
Starting with Pugsley.
150
00:07:44,855 --> 00:07:45,943
-(Pugsley squeaks)
-(bones crack)
151
00:07:45,986 --> 00:07:46,813
(groans)
152
00:07:46,857 --> 00:07:48,206
(grunts)
153
00:07:48,249 --> 00:07:50,774
-Love hurts, huh, kid?
-Huh?
154
00:07:50,817 --> 00:07:53,167
Well, I saw you
swing and miss horribly
155
00:07:53,211 --> 00:07:55,561
with the ladies
at the science fair.
156
00:07:55,605 --> 00:07:59,043
So, I thought you
should read my book!
157
00:07:59,086 --> 00:08:03,961
The Fester Method: How to
Woo and Other Tips on Love.
158
00:08:04,004 --> 00:08:05,266
(laughs)
159
00:08:05,310 --> 00:08:06,529
You wrote this?
160
00:08:06,572 --> 00:08:08,356
Self-published, on the Internet.
161
00:08:08,400 --> 00:08:10,271
Not easy to do.
162
00:08:10,315 --> 00:08:13,274
Pugsley, I've been
on three first dates.
163
00:08:13,318 --> 00:08:16,713
I mean, who else has
that kind of experience?
164
00:08:20,107 --> 00:08:23,720
I know this, uh, goes
against guy code,
165
00:08:23,763 --> 00:08:25,591
but what are you
doing Friday night?
166
00:08:25,635 --> 00:08:27,593
-(fanfare blaring)
-(gasps)
167
00:08:30,553 --> 00:08:32,337
Hey, you kids,
come on down here.
168
00:08:32,380 --> 00:08:33,556
It's dinner time.
169
00:08:33,599 --> 00:08:35,427
FESTER: Mmm.
170
00:08:35,470 --> 00:08:36,646
-(yelps) -Oh, boy,
oh, boy, oh, boy!
171
00:08:36,689 --> 00:08:37,908
(Pugsley coughs)
172
00:08:37,951 --> 00:08:40,258
It's dinner time, my
favorite nighttime meal!
173
00:08:40,301 --> 00:08:41,476
(yelps) My balls!
174
00:08:41,520 --> 00:08:43,478
Ow, ow. My stomach! (grunting)
175
00:08:43,522 --> 00:08:45,132
-(Grandma screams)
-uh-oh, my head!
176
00:08:45,176 --> 00:08:46,612
(screaming)
177
00:08:48,135 --> 00:08:50,181
(laughs) Mmm.
178
00:08:51,225 --> 00:08:52,183
Oh!
179
00:08:53,488 --> 00:08:55,273
-(groans)
-(Fester groans)
180
00:08:55,316 --> 00:08:57,188
Please, Uncle Fester,
wait for the children.
181
00:08:57,231 --> 00:08:58,668
Children?
182
00:08:58,711 --> 00:09:00,800
I thought we were
having chicken.
183
00:09:00,844 --> 00:09:02,497
Where are those two?
184
00:09:02,541 --> 00:09:04,891
Pugsley may have an
appetite for destruction,
185
00:09:04,935 --> 00:09:07,067
but it's never a
match for his stomach.
186
00:09:07,111 --> 00:09:08,547
I wouldn't wait on Pugsley.
187
00:09:08,591 --> 00:09:11,028
Kid's got a lot of
homework to do.
188
00:09:11,071 --> 00:09:12,595
(sighs) This generation.
189
00:09:12,638 --> 00:09:14,597
Let's at least wait
for Wednesday.
190
00:09:14,640 --> 00:09:16,381
(glass shatters)
191
00:09:16,424 --> 00:09:18,557
Why does nobody in this family
192
00:09:18,601 --> 00:09:20,211
come in through the front door?
193
00:09:20,254 --> 00:09:22,300
"Dearest Mother and Father,
194
00:09:22,343 --> 00:09:25,259
I will not be attending this
evening's ritual mastication."
195
00:09:25,303 --> 00:09:26,565
I guess she's not hungry.
196
00:09:26,609 --> 00:09:28,567
"It's not that I'm not hungry,
197
00:09:28,611 --> 00:09:30,569
I am just choosing
to spare myself
198
00:09:30,613 --> 00:09:33,703
the agony of your compliments
on my performance today
199
00:09:33,746 --> 00:09:36,793
and your needy attempt to hang
my award above the fireplace."
200
00:09:36,836 --> 00:09:38,664
I should go try to talk to her.
201
00:09:38,708 --> 00:09:40,405
MORTICIA: "Don't
try to talk to me.
202
00:09:40,448 --> 00:09:41,711
I want to be alone."
203
00:09:41,754 --> 00:09:44,278
We should bring
her a plate at least.
204
00:09:44,322 --> 00:09:46,454
"P.S. Don't even
bring me a plate."
205
00:09:46,498 --> 00:09:49,022
(groans) This is
the third dinner
206
00:09:49,066 --> 00:09:50,589
Wednesday has skipped this week.
207
00:09:50,633 --> 00:09:52,156
Why is she avoiding us?
208
00:09:52,199 --> 00:09:55,159
All I ever do is try to
love and support her.
209
00:09:55,202 --> 00:09:58,510
Gomez, I think she's
saying that's the problem.
210
00:09:58,553 --> 00:10:01,556
You're brilliant, cara mia.
211
00:10:01,600 --> 00:10:03,515
-What?
-She's trying to tell me
212
00:10:03,558 --> 00:10:05,735
that what a young girl wants
213
00:10:05,778 --> 00:10:07,650
is a ton of attention
from her father.
214
00:10:07,693 --> 00:10:10,740
Or you could just
keep being yourself.
215
00:10:10,783 --> 00:10:13,438
Let her come back to
us when she's ready.
216
00:10:13,481 --> 00:10:15,396
But that could take forever!
217
00:10:15,440 --> 00:10:19,444
(gasps) I have the very
solution to the problem, cara mia.
218
00:10:19,487 --> 00:10:21,011
We'll take a family road trip.
219
00:10:21,054 --> 00:10:22,577
What?
220
00:10:22,621 --> 00:10:25,145
You've always wanted to
see more of this great country.
221
00:10:25,189 --> 00:10:26,843
Well, it's true.
222
00:10:26,886 --> 00:10:30,673
We have some of the best
dark secrets, as countries go.
223
00:10:30,716 --> 00:10:32,065
Then it's settled!
224
00:10:32,109 --> 00:10:35,286
We are going on an
Addams family vacation!
225
00:10:36,461 --> 00:10:38,332
(rooster crowing)
226
00:10:39,246 --> 00:10:40,987
GOMEZ: Come on, kids.
227
00:10:41,031 --> 00:10:44,991
Feast your eyes on
the old Addams camper.
228
00:10:45,035 --> 00:10:46,863
Thing's been fixing it up.
229
00:10:52,303 --> 00:10:53,696
(gulps, slurps)
230
00:10:53,739 --> 00:10:54,914
It's a hybrid.
231
00:10:54,958 --> 00:10:57,525
Half car, half eyesore.
232
00:10:57,569 --> 00:11:00,267
WEDNESDAY: Mother,
Father, this is cruel.
233
00:11:00,311 --> 00:11:02,182
Even for you.
234
00:11:02,226 --> 00:11:03,793
(Lurch groans)
235
00:11:03,836 --> 00:11:06,273
-That's the spirit, Lurch.
-(groans)
236
00:11:08,188 --> 00:11:10,234
-(horn screams)
-Ha-ha!
237
00:11:10,277 --> 00:11:11,714
Let's go, Wednesday.
238
00:11:11,757 --> 00:11:14,020
It's time for some
family bonding.
239
00:11:14,064 --> 00:11:16,719
Whether you like it or not.
240
00:11:17,763 --> 00:11:19,243
You see, Wednesday,
241
00:11:19,286 --> 00:11:20,897
this trip will bring
the Addams family
242
00:11:20,940 --> 00:11:23,595
closer than ever
before. (chuckles)
243
00:11:23,638 --> 00:11:25,771
(Pugsley straining)
244
00:11:25,815 --> 00:11:28,426
Or there will be no survivors.
245
00:11:28,992 --> 00:11:30,471
(man) Hello?
246
00:11:30,515 --> 00:11:32,169
Anybody home?
247
00:11:32,212 --> 00:11:33,257
Hello?
248
00:11:33,300 --> 00:11:34,388
Mr. Addams?
249
00:11:35,346 --> 00:11:37,348
Hello, good sir!
250
00:11:37,391 --> 00:11:38,392
I am Gomez Addams.
251
00:11:39,698 --> 00:11:42,092
And this is my wife, Morticia.
252
00:11:42,135 --> 00:11:43,571
Charmed.
253
00:11:43,615 --> 00:11:45,138
I'll get right to the point.
254
00:11:45,182 --> 00:11:46,792
My name is Mustela.
255
00:11:46,836 --> 00:11:50,274
I'm a lawyer representing a
couple in Sausalito, California.
256
00:11:50,317 --> 00:11:52,058
Recent evidence
has come to light
257
00:11:52,102 --> 00:11:54,713
that on the night of my
client's daughter's birth,
258
00:11:54,757 --> 00:11:56,280
she may have been switched
259
00:11:56,323 --> 00:11:58,499
with another child
at the hospital.
260
00:11:58,543 --> 00:12:03,069
Namely, a Wednesday Addams.
261
00:12:03,113 --> 00:12:04,592
-(Morticia snickers)
-(laughing hysterically)
262
00:12:07,117 --> 00:12:09,162
Ooh, hilarious!
263
00:12:09,206 --> 00:12:13,166
All this, just to get out
of a family road trip.
264
00:12:13,210 --> 00:12:15,125
How much did Wednesday pay you?
265
00:12:15,168 --> 00:12:16,691
Excuse me?
266
00:12:16,735 --> 00:12:19,172
Oh! Sorry, sorry,
where are my manners?
267
00:12:19,216 --> 00:12:21,871
I think he's expecting a tip.
268
00:12:21,914 --> 00:12:24,830
No, I'm expecting a DNA sample.
269
00:12:24,874 --> 00:12:26,658
If you'll bring the
child here, we can--
270
00:12:26,701 --> 00:12:29,400
I never seem to have a tip.
271
00:12:29,443 --> 00:12:30,793
-(Mr. Mustela gasps)
-I do.
272
00:12:30,836 --> 00:12:33,621
Great Uncle Zander left
me these tips in his will.
273
00:12:33,665 --> 00:12:35,754
I knew one day
they'd come in handy.
274
00:12:35,798 --> 00:12:37,887
There you go, my good man.
275
00:12:37,930 --> 00:12:40,454
Well played. Very
amusing indeed.
276
00:12:40,498 --> 00:12:42,413
I assure you, Mr. Addams,
277
00:12:42,456 --> 00:12:45,590
there's nothing
amusing about this.
278
00:12:45,633 --> 00:12:48,985
And this is far from over!
279
00:12:49,028 --> 00:12:51,204
I can't believe he
gave me the finger.
280
00:12:52,466 --> 00:12:55,469
Mother, Father,
who was that man?
281
00:12:55,513 --> 00:12:57,341
Very funny, Wednesday.
282
00:12:57,384 --> 00:12:59,082
(laughs) Nice try.
283
00:12:59,125 --> 00:13:01,388
I have no idea what
you're talking about.
284
00:13:01,432 --> 00:13:02,999
Who was he?
285
00:13:05,740 --> 00:13:07,394
No one for you to worry about.
286
00:13:07,438 --> 00:13:08,743
No one at all, dear.
287
00:13:09,657 --> 00:13:10,658
Hmm.
288
00:13:11,964 --> 00:13:13,531
MORTICIA: Thank you
for watching the house
289
00:13:13,574 --> 00:13:14,924
while we're gone, Grandma.
290
00:13:14,967 --> 00:13:17,448
It's such a relief to
know it's in safe hands.
291
00:13:17,491 --> 00:13:19,058
Oh, please.
292
00:13:19,102 --> 00:13:22,496
Trust me, these hands
have cracked many safes.
293
00:13:22,540 --> 00:13:25,717
Thing, let the
vacation commence!
294
00:13:25,760 --> 00:13:27,371
(engine starts)
295
00:13:27,414 --> 00:13:28,633
Let's roll!
296
00:13:31,679 --> 00:13:33,725
(up-tempo music playing)
297
00:13:33,768 --> 00:13:35,292
(tires screeching)
298
00:13:39,426 --> 00:13:41,515
Bye! Farewell!
299
00:13:41,559 --> 00:13:44,301
Adios!Toodle-oo!
300
00:13:44,344 --> 00:13:46,303
Whoo-hoo-hoo! I
thought they'd never leave.
301
00:13:46,346 --> 00:13:49,262
(spirit) Let's party!
302
00:13:49,915 --> 00:13:51,351
(Grandma laughs)
303
00:13:51,395 --> 00:13:53,092
You read my mind, chuckles.
304
00:13:53,136 --> 00:13:54,877
Time to make some money.
305
00:14:02,536 --> 00:14:03,624
I thought that first,
306
00:14:03,668 --> 00:14:06,279
we shall pay our
respects to the immolated
307
00:14:06,323 --> 00:14:08,412
in the witch-haunted
city of Salem.
308
00:14:08,455 --> 00:14:12,459
Then, in the great nomadic
tradition of our ancestors,
309
00:14:12,503 --> 00:14:16,376
we'll flit hither and thither
across this great nation
310
00:14:16,420 --> 00:14:17,725
until we reach
311
00:14:17,769 --> 00:14:19,858
-our final destination.
-(muffled screaming)
312
00:14:19,902 --> 00:14:23,862
The place on Earth
where people are happiest!
313
00:14:23,906 --> 00:14:25,995
Death Valley!
314
00:14:26,952 --> 00:14:28,345
We'll be gone for three weeks.
315
00:14:28,388 --> 00:14:30,173
Three weeks?
316
00:14:30,216 --> 00:14:32,349
You're both growing up so fast.
317
00:14:32,392 --> 00:14:33,959
Soon, you'll move out,
318
00:14:34,003 --> 00:14:35,569
and it'll be nice
to have a memory
319
00:14:35,613 --> 00:14:36,919
we could look back upon.
320
00:14:36,962 --> 00:14:39,617
No matter how terrible.
321
00:14:39,660 --> 00:14:41,314
Ooh, like prom night.
322
00:14:41,358 --> 00:14:43,055
(up-tempo music continues)
323
00:14:45,362 --> 00:14:48,582
♫ This family
'Bout to go global ♫
324
00:14:48,626 --> 00:14:50,541
(horn blares)
325
00:14:50,584 --> 00:14:52,978
I can't believe the boss
made me bring backup.
326
00:14:53,022 --> 00:14:54,849
No offense, I just
really don't see
327
00:14:54,893 --> 00:14:56,416
what you bring to the table.
328
00:14:56,460 --> 00:14:57,374
(growls)
329
00:14:57,417 --> 00:14:59,028
All I know is,
330
00:14:59,071 --> 00:15:01,552
if we don't get that girl and
bring her back to Sausalito,
331
00:15:01,595 --> 00:15:03,032
we'll both be fired.
332
00:15:03,075 --> 00:15:04,250
(growls)
333
00:15:04,294 --> 00:15:06,818
Oh, ugh. Mint?
334
00:15:06,861 --> 00:15:08,428
You know what? Take 'em all.
335
00:15:11,779 --> 00:15:13,781
(up-tempo music continues)
336
00:15:21,485 --> 00:15:24,009
♫ This family
'Bout to go global ♫
337
00:15:27,839 --> 00:15:29,972
(eerie vocalizing)
338
00:15:32,713 --> 00:15:34,367
(continues vocalizing)
339
00:15:34,411 --> 00:15:35,978
Ooh, ooh, ooh.
And then it goes...
340
00:15:36,021 --> 00:15:38,893
(vocalizing in deep voice)
341
00:15:41,809 --> 00:15:43,986
Anyway, it's not finished yet,
342
00:15:44,029 --> 00:15:46,379
but it's my best rock opera yet.
343
00:15:46,423 --> 00:15:48,816
I'm calling it Rocktapus.
344
00:15:48,860 --> 00:15:50,383
I wrote it in the bath.
345
00:15:50,427 --> 00:15:53,212
I've been taking a
lot of baths recently.
346
00:15:53,256 --> 00:15:54,561
You know, I think it's...
347
00:15:54,605 --> 00:15:56,041
(bell dings)
348
00:15:56,085 --> 00:15:57,042
(Fester gasps)
349
00:15:58,565 --> 00:16:02,004
All that beautiful
water! (echoes)
350
00:16:03,309 --> 00:16:05,007
Forget Salem! We
know how it turned out.
351
00:16:05,050 --> 00:16:06,399
Change of plans.
352
00:16:06,443 --> 00:16:07,444
(tires screeching)
353
00:16:24,113 --> 00:16:26,245
Thing, how did this happen?
354
00:16:26,289 --> 00:16:27,855
We were supposed to be in Salem.
355
00:16:29,901 --> 00:16:31,859
Ah, don't be mad, brother.
356
00:16:31,903 --> 00:16:34,471
Niagara Falls is the
great Wonder of the World
357
00:16:34,514 --> 00:16:36,995
and kills the most tourists
358
00:16:37,039 --> 00:16:39,911
with its powerful, seductive
359
00:16:41,260 --> 00:16:42,696
water. (echoes)
360
00:16:42,740 --> 00:16:44,568
(water bubbling)
361
00:16:44,611 --> 00:16:46,874
(Gomez muffled) Fester? Fester?
362
00:16:46,918 --> 00:16:48,746
-(muffling stops) Hey, Fester.
-(shaking wetly)
363
00:16:48,789 --> 00:16:50,008
Are you feeling all right?
364
00:16:50,052 --> 00:16:52,619
You're not your
usual creepy self.
365
00:16:52,663 --> 00:16:53,881
Not especially.
366
00:16:53,925 --> 00:16:55,361
Will you take a look at this?
367
00:16:55,405 --> 00:16:57,363
-Does this seem off to you?
-(sniffing)
368
00:16:57,407 --> 00:16:58,756
It smells okay,
369
00:16:58,799 --> 00:17:00,540
but make sure to
put it in the fridge.
370
00:17:00,584 --> 00:17:02,107
Seafood turns very quickly.
371
00:17:04,544 --> 00:17:06,068
Having fun?
372
00:17:06,111 --> 00:17:10,246
I'm staring at Canada, if
that answers your question.
373
00:17:10,289 --> 00:17:11,986
I'm sorry, Wednesday.
374
00:17:12,030 --> 00:17:13,597
I know how much
you wanted to see
375
00:17:13,640 --> 00:17:16,078
where girls your age
were burned at the stake.
376
00:17:16,121 --> 00:17:17,253
What did you call them again?
377
00:17:17,775 --> 00:17:20,169
Squad goals.
378
00:17:20,212 --> 00:17:22,301
What do you say we
do a little exploring?
379
00:17:22,345 --> 00:17:23,389
Just us.
380
00:17:23,433 --> 00:17:25,478
I saw a vintage store in town.
381
00:17:25,522 --> 00:17:28,742
Maybe it's time for you to
try out a more mature look.
382
00:17:30,353 --> 00:17:32,920
The little black dress
is a classic, Mother.
383
00:17:32,964 --> 00:17:34,618
There's my little holy terror.
384
00:17:34,661 --> 00:17:36,010
(groans)
385
00:17:36,054 --> 00:17:38,404
You know how I feel
about hugs, Father.
386
00:17:38,448 --> 00:17:40,145
(gasps, chuckles)
387
00:17:42,060 --> 00:17:45,281
Did you know dozens of
people tried to go over these falls
388
00:17:45,324 --> 00:17:46,760
in wooden barrels?
389
00:17:46,804 --> 00:17:48,327
Does anyone survive?
390
00:17:48,371 --> 00:17:50,895
Some do. Some don't.
391
00:17:50,938 --> 00:17:54,725
I hear it's a barrel of fun.
392
00:17:54,768 --> 00:17:56,727
-(laughs)
-(Wednesday groans)
393
00:17:56,770 --> 00:18:00,165
Pugsley, have you ever
worn a coat of live bees?
394
00:18:00,209 --> 00:18:02,646
(girl laughs) OMG.
395
00:18:02,689 --> 00:18:04,735
I should totes take a
selfie of this moment.
396
00:18:04,778 --> 00:18:06,128
(camera clicking)
397
00:18:06,171 --> 00:18:09,000
Ah! This is the
perfect opportunity
398
00:18:09,043 --> 00:18:10,915
to try out the moves in my book.
399
00:18:10,958 --> 00:18:12,221
The key with women
400
00:18:12,264 --> 00:18:14,788
is to make a strong
first impression.
401
00:18:14,832 --> 00:18:16,355
You mean like a bad smell?
402
00:18:16,399 --> 00:18:17,965
Well, that goes without saying.
403
00:18:18,009 --> 00:18:21,752
What I mean is, it's
important to make a big splash.
404
00:18:21,795 --> 00:18:23,319
Are you with me, kid?
405
00:18:26,365 --> 00:18:27,453
-(grunts)
-(girls gasp)
406
00:18:27,497 --> 00:18:28,672
-Huh?
-PUGSLEY: Ouch!
407
00:18:28,715 --> 00:18:30,630
I just skinned my knee
408
00:18:30,674 --> 00:18:32,502
falling for you.
409
00:18:33,242 --> 00:18:34,591
(both laughing)
410
00:18:34,634 --> 00:18:36,636
That's so corny.
411
00:18:36,680 --> 00:18:39,422
Ugh. Did you get
that from a book?
412
00:18:39,465 --> 00:18:40,684
-Uh-oh. Uh...
-(girls laughing)
413
00:18:40,727 --> 00:18:42,990
Leave this to me.
414
00:18:43,034 --> 00:18:45,558
Excuse me, vacuous lemmings.
415
00:18:47,865 --> 00:18:49,780
(gasps) Oh, come on.
416
00:18:53,175 --> 00:18:55,177
-♫ "Jump Around" playing
♫ -(Pugsley whimpering)
417
00:18:59,572 --> 00:19:01,922
♫ Pack it up, pack
it in Let me begin ♫
418
00:19:01,966 --> 00:19:04,490
♫ I came to win
Battle me, that's a sin ♫
419
00:19:04,534 --> 00:19:06,405
♫ I won't ever slack up
Punk, you better back up ♫
420
00:19:06,449 --> 00:19:07,972
♫ Try and play
the role And, yo ♫
421
00:19:08,015 --> 00:19:09,408
-♫ The whole crew'll act
up ♫ -(mimics explosion)
422
00:19:09,452 --> 00:19:10,888
♫ I came to get down
I came to get down ♫
423
00:19:10,931 --> 00:19:12,063
♫ So get out your
seat And jump around ♫
424
00:19:13,195 --> 00:19:14,326
-♫ Jump around! ♫ -(grunting)
425
00:19:15,022 --> 00:19:17,024
Stop! No! (groaning)
426
00:19:17,068 --> 00:19:18,200
♫ Jump around! ♫
427
00:19:18,243 --> 00:19:19,549
(all laughing)
428
00:19:19,592 --> 00:19:22,029
♫ Jump up, jump
up And get down! ♫
429
00:19:22,073 --> 00:19:24,031
♫ Jump! Jump! Jump! Jump! ♫
430
00:19:24,075 --> 00:19:26,947
♫ Everybody jump!
Jump! Jump! Jump! ♫
431
00:19:26,991 --> 00:19:28,079
♫ Everybody jump! ♫
432
00:19:28,122 --> 00:19:30,255
(screaming)
433
00:19:34,912 --> 00:19:37,958
Madison, would you do me
the honor of becoming my wife?
434
00:19:38,002 --> 00:19:39,395
-(Pugsley screaming)
-(Madison gasps)
435
00:19:39,438 --> 00:19:41,832
(shrieks) Help!
436
00:19:41,875 --> 00:19:43,268
Is that a maybe?
437
00:19:43,312 --> 00:19:44,835
(screaming)
438
00:19:44,878 --> 00:19:46,793
(grunts, screaming)
439
00:19:49,709 --> 00:19:51,145
(whimpering)
440
00:19:51,189 --> 00:19:53,409
-(screaming)
-(crowd gasps)
441
00:19:55,149 --> 00:19:57,239
(grunts, screaming)
442
00:19:59,110 --> 00:20:00,546
(all exclaim)
443
00:20:00,590 --> 00:20:02,940
Right in the Niagara balls!
444
00:20:02,983 --> 00:20:04,376
(muffled groaning)
445
00:20:05,725 --> 00:20:07,466
(yelps)
446
00:20:07,510 --> 00:20:09,338
GOMEZ: Nobody
is renting barrels.
447
00:20:09,381 --> 00:20:12,210
I had to buy 300
pickles just to get these.
448
00:20:12,254 --> 00:20:13,690
MR. MUSTELA: You go
that way. I'll look over here.
449
00:20:13,733 --> 00:20:14,604
Gomez, look.
450
00:20:16,083 --> 00:20:17,563
Isn't that the weaselly man
451
00:20:17,607 --> 00:20:19,652
who came to the house
looking for Wednesday?
452
00:20:19,696 --> 00:20:22,829
Well, I have to admit, I
admire the man's tenacity.
453
00:20:22,873 --> 00:20:24,091
Wednesday, let's try
454
00:20:24,135 --> 00:20:26,659
a little family
trust-building exercise.
455
00:20:26,703 --> 00:20:28,922
-I don't believe in exercise.
-GOMEZ: Sorry!
456
00:20:29,836 --> 00:20:30,750
(Wednesday grunting)
457
00:20:31,577 --> 00:20:32,274
(yelps)
458
00:20:33,753 --> 00:20:34,972
(growls)
459
00:20:36,626 --> 00:20:41,152
Excelsior!Whoo-hoo-hoo!
460
00:20:42,762 --> 00:20:44,286
-(groans) -Hey,
hey, wait for me!
461
00:20:44,329 --> 00:20:46,288
I wanna go in the water too!
462
00:20:46,331 --> 00:20:47,941
(both grunting)
463
00:20:47,985 --> 00:20:49,073
(both yelling)
464
00:20:52,903 --> 00:20:53,991
(bird squawks)
465
00:20:54,034 --> 00:20:56,385
MR. MUSTELA: Help! Pongo!
466
00:20:56,428 --> 00:20:58,387
Guess that takes care of that.
467
00:20:59,213 --> 00:21:00,824
Hey, where's Pugsley?
468
00:21:00,867 --> 00:21:02,216
(water bubbles)
469
00:21:02,260 --> 00:21:04,697
Well, look at this, a
tiny floating person.
470
00:21:04,741 --> 00:21:06,177
-(doll squeaks)
-(muffled groan)
471
00:21:06,220 --> 00:21:07,657
Oh! There he is.
472
00:21:08,440 --> 00:21:09,876
(gasps, coughing)
473
00:21:11,356 --> 00:21:13,837
How great was that, Wednesday?
474
00:21:13,880 --> 00:21:15,708
And we both survived.
475
00:21:15,752 --> 00:21:17,971
Another thing we have in common.
476
00:21:18,015 --> 00:21:20,322
Okay, what's going on?
477
00:21:20,365 --> 00:21:21,627
MORTICIA: Whatever do you mean?
478
00:21:21,671 --> 00:21:22,976
Father.
479
00:21:23,020 --> 00:21:25,501
His erratic behavior.
480
00:21:25,544 --> 00:21:27,851
This last-minute family
trip to make memories.
481
00:21:27,894 --> 00:21:29,331
Giving hugs.
482
00:21:29,374 --> 00:21:30,723
It's torture.
483
00:21:30,767 --> 00:21:32,029
And not the fun kind,
484
00:21:32,072 --> 00:21:35,075
like putting leeches
in Pugsley's briefs.
485
00:21:35,119 --> 00:21:37,774
Anyway, I'm quite
sure he's dying.
486
00:21:37,817 --> 00:21:39,384
-What?
-Don't worry.
487
00:21:39,428 --> 00:21:40,820
I won't tell Pugsley.
488
00:21:40,864 --> 00:21:41,995
Not yet.
489
00:21:42,039 --> 00:21:44,128
He'll enjoy the surprise.
490
00:21:44,171 --> 00:21:48,654
But if you're afraid to ask my
permission to take a new lover,
491
00:21:48,698 --> 00:21:50,264
just know you have it.
492
00:21:50,308 --> 00:21:52,266
-(Fester chittering)
-(Pugsley sighs tiredly)
493
00:21:52,310 --> 00:21:55,226
♫ "Mommy's Little
Monster" playing ♫
494
00:21:58,838 --> 00:22:01,537
♫ Mommy's little monster
Dropped out of school ♫
495
00:22:01,580 --> 00:22:04,627
(Pugsley groans) Ouch!
Mom, tell her to stop!
496
00:22:04,670 --> 00:22:06,629
MORTICIA: Please,
darlings, quiet down.
497
00:22:06,672 --> 00:22:08,413
I'm trying to find a signal.
498
00:22:09,675 --> 00:22:11,634
-(Pugsley yelps)
-(growls)
499
00:22:12,809 --> 00:22:14,027
PUGSLEY: Ow!
500
00:22:14,071 --> 00:22:15,551
-Mom, help!
-(sighs)
501
00:22:15,594 --> 00:22:17,640
Gomez, have you heard
from your mother yet?
502
00:22:17,683 --> 00:22:19,642
She's not answering my texts.
503
00:22:19,685 --> 00:22:21,818
Oh, she's probably
having an early night.
504
00:22:21,861 --> 00:22:25,822
The woman is almost
102 years old, after all.
505
00:22:25,865 --> 00:22:27,824
-♫ Let's rock this
party ♫ -Whoo! (laughs)
506
00:22:27,867 --> 00:22:29,391
-(dance music playing)
-♫ Come on now ♫
507
00:22:29,434 --> 00:22:31,958
♫ Let's rock this
party, yeah ♫
508
00:22:32,698 --> 00:22:33,917
Whoo-hoo!
509
00:22:33,960 --> 00:22:35,440
-(laughing) -We're
here for the party!
510
00:22:36,049 --> 00:22:37,573
Whoop-la!
511
00:22:37,616 --> 00:22:38,661
Tickets, please!
512
00:22:38,704 --> 00:22:42,142
Wow, this place is a whole mood.
513
00:22:42,186 --> 00:22:45,581
Well, if you're in
the mood to party,
514
00:22:45,624 --> 00:22:47,452
step right this way.
515
00:22:47,496 --> 00:22:50,020
Whoa! This plant totes slaps!
516
00:22:50,063 --> 00:22:53,066
No, darling, she snaps.
517
00:22:53,110 --> 00:22:55,025
-(both shriek) -Oh,
don't worry, don't worry.
518
00:22:55,068 --> 00:22:57,027
She's on a vegan diet.
519
00:22:57,070 --> 00:23:00,900
In that she only eats
vegans. (laughing)
520
00:23:00,944 --> 00:23:02,336
And who's the headliner?
521
00:23:02,380 --> 00:23:04,991
Uh... Uh... The Talking Heads.
522
00:23:05,035 --> 00:23:05,992
For reals?
523
00:23:06,036 --> 00:23:07,254
Uh, yeah, yeah.
524
00:23:07,298 --> 00:23:08,691
Uh, they're right over there.
525
00:23:08,734 --> 00:23:10,083
♫ You 'bout that lifestyle ♫
526
00:23:10,127 --> 00:23:11,476
♫ Lifestyle ♫
527
00:23:11,520 --> 00:23:13,173
-♫ Everybody knows
♫ -(head beatboxing)
528
00:23:13,217 --> 00:23:16,481
♫ Diamonds ain't got
nothin' On you, ooh, ooh ♫
529
00:23:16,525 --> 00:23:17,917
♫ We 'bout that lifestyle ♫
530
00:23:17,961 --> 00:23:20,050
Um... I didn't pay $500 to
watch a bunch of puppets.
531
00:23:20,093 --> 00:23:21,486
What?
532
00:23:21,530 --> 00:23:23,314
Do you know how
hard it is to decapitate
533
00:23:23,357 --> 00:23:24,968
an entire barber shop quartet?
534
00:23:25,011 --> 00:23:26,970
(all gasp)
535
00:23:27,013 --> 00:23:29,233
Ew! Refund, please.
536
00:23:29,276 --> 00:23:30,452
No, no, no. (chuckles)
537
00:23:30,495 --> 00:23:31,931
Let's not be hasty.
538
00:23:31,975 --> 00:23:34,412
(sputters) I was just joking.
539
00:23:34,456 --> 00:23:36,022
I don't want to
ruin the surprise.
540
00:23:36,066 --> 00:23:38,024
And... And trust me,
541
00:23:38,068 --> 00:23:41,332
the headliner will make
serious headlines. (chuckles)
542
00:23:41,375 --> 00:23:42,855
(heads) ♫ You
'bout that lifestyle ♫
543
00:23:42,899 --> 00:23:44,553
-(groans) -♫
Lifestyle, lifestyle ♫
544
00:23:44,596 --> 00:23:45,554
♫ Lifestyle ♫
545
00:23:46,511 --> 00:23:48,687
(owl hooting)
546
00:23:51,516 --> 00:23:53,387
GOMEZ: It was the dead of night.
547
00:23:56,478 --> 00:23:58,871
-The witching hour.
-(disembodied cackling)
548
00:23:58,915 --> 00:24:00,482
The wolf howled.
549
00:24:00,525 --> 00:24:01,744
(howling)
550
00:24:03,789 --> 00:24:06,923
And then she heard a
scratching at the door.
551
00:24:06,966 --> 00:24:08,577
Scratch,
552
00:24:08,620 --> 00:24:10,100
scratch,
553
00:24:10,143 --> 00:24:12,232
scratch.
554
00:24:12,276 --> 00:24:15,584
She slowly opened it to reveal
555
00:24:16,149 --> 00:24:17,977
a puppy!
556
00:24:18,021 --> 00:24:20,284
-(gasps)
-And around its neck
557
00:24:20,327 --> 00:24:21,546
was a bow!
558
00:24:21,590 --> 00:24:22,808
(screams)
559
00:24:22,852 --> 00:24:25,898
-Mm. Gomez.
-(laughing)
560
00:24:25,942 --> 00:24:28,553
You remember when I first
told you that one, Pugsley?
561
00:24:28,597 --> 00:24:30,773
You must've been two months old.
562
00:24:30,816 --> 00:24:34,385
Oh, you'd scream and
scream until you wet yourself.
563
00:24:34,428 --> 00:24:36,561
Some things never change.
564
00:24:38,607 --> 00:24:40,391
She's not back yet.
565
00:24:40,434 --> 00:24:42,001
She said she wanted to be alone,
566
00:24:42,045 --> 00:24:44,134
but how long does that take?
567
00:24:44,177 --> 00:24:45,831
-(Kitty growls)
-There she is.
568
00:24:45,875 --> 00:24:47,920
How did it go out
there, Wednesday?
569
00:24:47,964 --> 00:24:49,531
GOMEZ: Did Kitty
do his business?
570
00:24:49,574 --> 00:24:50,532
Indeed.
571
00:24:52,490 --> 00:24:54,013
-(Pugsley groans) Ew!
-Come, come. Join us.
572
00:24:54,057 --> 00:24:56,625
We were just telling stories
of when Pugsley was born.
573
00:24:56,668 --> 00:24:58,931
He kept us up all night,
howling. (chuckles)
574
00:24:58,975 --> 00:25:00,759
Wednesday, you
were the opposite.
575
00:25:00,803 --> 00:25:02,065
I've never heard of a baby
576
00:25:02,108 --> 00:25:04,371
being completely silent before.
577
00:25:04,415 --> 00:25:05,764
-(Pugsley groans)
-Ah, yes,
578
00:25:05,808 --> 00:25:08,158
I remember the night
Wednesday was born.
579
00:25:08,201 --> 00:25:09,768
It was a Tuesday.
580
00:25:09,812 --> 00:25:12,728
All tucked in tight in
the hospital nursery.
581
00:25:12,771 --> 00:25:15,426
She was silent as a jellyfish.
582
00:25:15,469 --> 00:25:18,429
Even when all the other
little babies started bawling.
583
00:25:18,472 --> 00:25:20,387
(chuckles) What do you mean?
584
00:25:20,431 --> 00:25:22,825
Oh, I never told you this story?
585
00:25:24,000 --> 00:25:26,742
Start talking.
586
00:25:26,785 --> 00:25:28,395
FESTER: Well, I was
looking for a bathroom
587
00:25:28,439 --> 00:25:31,007
because I'd eaten all
of the patients' pudding
588
00:25:31,050 --> 00:25:32,922
that they left behind,
589
00:25:32,965 --> 00:25:35,794
when I took a wrong turn
into the hospital nursery.
590
00:25:38,101 --> 00:25:39,929
-(music playing on speakers)
-♫ I'd tip my hat to you ♫
591
00:25:39,972 --> 00:25:41,887
-♫ I'd do just that
♫ -(babies wailing)
592
00:25:41,931 --> 00:25:42,758
(music stops)
593
00:25:44,673 --> 00:25:46,588
FESTER: And that's
when I spotted her.
594
00:25:50,243 --> 00:25:53,638
I just wanted to get a
better look at my new niece.
595
00:25:53,682 --> 00:25:55,640
But a bunch of
the babies started
596
00:25:55,684 --> 00:25:57,250
wailing their heads off.
597
00:25:57,294 --> 00:26:01,080
So, I remembered the age-old
Addams family nursery trick.
598
00:26:01,864 --> 00:26:04,040
(Fester grunting)
599
00:26:05,737 --> 00:26:07,521
(babies continue wailing)
600
00:26:08,653 --> 00:26:09,611
(grunts)
601
00:26:13,136 --> 00:26:15,399
And sure enough,
they all fell asleep.
602
00:26:15,442 --> 00:26:17,662
(coos)
603
00:26:17,706 --> 00:26:20,230
And I put all the babies
back where I found them.
604
00:26:21,448 --> 00:26:22,536
I think.
605
00:26:24,713 --> 00:26:26,236
-Pretty sure.
-(grunts)
606
00:26:27,498 --> 00:26:28,630
(chuckles)
607
00:26:30,501 --> 00:26:32,459
-Kitty needs a walk.
-Right away.
608
00:26:32,503 --> 00:26:33,547
WEDNESDAY: But I just walked--
609
00:26:33,591 --> 00:26:36,159
MORTICIA: Fester,
you're in charge.
610
00:26:36,202 --> 00:26:38,814
FESTER: I wonder if I
could juggle actual children.
611
00:26:38,857 --> 00:26:41,120
Wednesday, Pugsley,
bring it in, let's find out.
612
00:26:41,164 --> 00:26:43,079
You never know until you try.
613
00:26:43,122 --> 00:26:44,297
-(Pugsley laughing)
-And if one of you
614
00:26:44,341 --> 00:26:46,386
falls on your head,
well, lesson learned.
615
00:26:46,430 --> 00:26:49,868
Hard to believe women don't
want to talk to either of you.
616
00:26:51,740 --> 00:26:54,612
MORTICIA: Gomez, what if
what that lawyer said is true?
617
00:26:54,656 --> 00:26:57,093
These people are
not going to give up.
618
00:26:57,136 --> 00:27:00,096
They'll keep coming
until they take her away.
619
00:27:00,139 --> 00:27:01,358
Let him come!
620
00:27:01,401 --> 00:27:04,013
They shall know us
by our trail of dead.
621
00:27:04,056 --> 00:27:06,929
MORTICIA: Ugh. That's
your answer to everything.
622
00:27:06,972 --> 00:27:08,800
(sighs) I only wish
623
00:27:08,844 --> 00:27:10,933
I did have the
answer for it, querida.
624
00:27:13,805 --> 00:27:14,893
(gasps)
625
00:27:14,937 --> 00:27:17,243
Tish! That's it.
626
00:27:17,287 --> 00:27:20,333
I may not have the answer,
but I know someone who will.
627
00:27:20,377 --> 00:27:22,031
MORTICIA: I hope so.
628
00:27:22,074 --> 00:27:24,729
Whatever we do, we can't
let Wednesday find out
629
00:27:24,773 --> 00:27:26,688
she might not be our daughter.
630
00:27:32,041 --> 00:27:33,825
Could it be true?
631
00:27:33,869 --> 00:27:37,873
Could I have been
misplaced in my infancy?
632
00:27:37,916 --> 00:27:41,093
Grown up with a delusion
that I am one person,
633
00:27:41,137 --> 00:27:46,751
when in fact, I am someone
completely different.
634
00:27:46,795 --> 00:27:51,843
Now this is the origin story
an innovator like me deserves.
635
00:27:51,887 --> 00:27:54,977
It would make a fascinating
first chapter in my memoir.
636
00:27:55,978 --> 00:27:57,066
Can you imagine?
637
00:27:57,544 --> 00:27:59,546
(gurgling)
638
00:28:02,027 --> 00:28:03,463
GOMEZ: Come on, kids!
639
00:28:03,507 --> 00:28:05,335
Up and Addams!
640
00:28:06,379 --> 00:28:08,991
Thing, head south.
641
00:28:09,034 --> 00:28:12,995
What we need is a little
old-fashioned Addams fun!
642
00:28:13,038 --> 00:28:14,431
Ha-ha!
643
00:28:14,474 --> 00:28:15,998
(thunder crashes)
644
00:28:23,179 --> 00:28:24,963
(man 1) I got it.
Oh! There we go.
645
00:28:25,007 --> 00:28:25,964
(man 2) Oh, dude!
646
00:28:27,879 --> 00:28:29,011
Hey, freak!
647
00:28:30,403 --> 00:28:31,883
-Pass it back!
-(chuckles)
648
00:28:32,405 --> 00:28:34,016
I'm not a freak.
649
00:28:35,974 --> 00:28:37,454
I'm a force of nature.
650
00:28:39,673 --> 00:28:41,458
Some force of nature.
651
00:28:41,501 --> 00:28:42,981
-So weak.
-(device hums)
652
00:28:44,591 --> 00:28:45,767
(gasps)
653
00:28:46,376 --> 00:28:48,160
Guys, you see this?
654
00:28:48,204 --> 00:28:50,032
-What's going on? what Is it?
-(Latin hip-hop music playing)
655
00:28:50,075 --> 00:28:51,468
(groans)
656
00:28:52,295 --> 00:28:57,648
(both groaning)
657
00:28:57,691 --> 00:28:59,911
♫ I only hang with the family
'Cause nobody can handle me ♫
658
00:28:59,955 --> 00:29:01,391
♫ Try to act like I'm scary Because
I'm somethin' They never seen ♫
659
00:29:01,434 --> 00:29:03,132
(Kitty grunts)
660
00:29:03,175 --> 00:29:04,873
♫ My whole room like a
vanity I'm in love with myself ♫
661
00:29:04,916 --> 00:29:06,744
♫ But they can't touch me
When I'm feelin' myself ♫
662
00:29:06,788 --> 00:29:09,007
(singing in Spanish)
663
00:29:19,452 --> 00:29:20,889
Oh, my.
664
00:29:20,932 --> 00:29:23,892
It looks like some
unfortunate soul
665
00:29:23,935 --> 00:29:27,634
has dropped a small
fortune in the sand.
666
00:29:27,678 --> 00:29:29,158
That's mine! (grunts)
667
00:29:32,814 --> 00:29:33,858
(groaning)
668
00:29:35,381 --> 00:29:37,688
♫ I've been around
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♫
669
00:29:37,731 --> 00:29:39,124
♫ With other girls
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♫
670
00:29:39,168 --> 00:29:42,214
-Lame!
-(all laughing)
671
00:29:42,258 --> 00:29:45,957
(sighs) It looks like we
need to go over Chapter 3,
672
00:29:46,001 --> 00:29:48,699
"How to be Repulsive
and Impress Girls."
673
00:29:48,742 --> 00:29:49,918
I'll be right back.
674
00:29:49,961 --> 00:29:52,268
I gotta go use the bathroom.
675
00:29:52,311 --> 00:29:54,270
♫ Wherever we are
Yeah, yeah, yeah ♫
676
00:29:54,313 --> 00:29:56,881
♫ Feels like home
Yeah, yeah, yeah ♫
677
00:29:56,925 --> 00:29:59,710
♫ Love that crazy baby ♫
678
00:29:59,753 --> 00:30:01,016
-(Lurch groans)
-♫ Shake it ♫
679
00:30:05,934 --> 00:30:07,892
(singing in Spanish)
680
00:30:10,939 --> 00:30:13,071
♫ Wherever we are
Yeah, yeah, yeah ♫
681
00:30:13,115 --> 00:30:14,899
♫ Feels like home
Yeah, yeah, yeah ♫
682
00:30:15,944 --> 00:30:16,988
(woman snickers)
683
00:30:17,902 --> 00:30:19,338
(gasps, screams)
684
00:30:19,382 --> 00:30:20,209
Shark! Shark!
685
00:30:24,909 --> 00:30:26,868
(all screaming)
686
00:30:29,871 --> 00:30:31,481
(kids crying)
687
00:30:33,570 --> 00:30:34,963
(woman) Run for your lives!
688
00:30:40,098 --> 00:30:42,057
Hyah! See?
689
00:30:42,100 --> 00:30:44,842
Now that's how
you attract attention.
690
00:30:44,886 --> 00:30:46,626
(airhorn toots)
691
00:30:46,670 --> 00:30:48,715
(hip-hop music playing)
692
00:30:48,759 --> 00:30:51,544
Ah! There he is.
693
00:30:51,588 --> 00:30:54,156
The man we came to see.
694
00:31:00,553 --> 00:31:02,294
(engine accelerating)
695
00:31:03,817 --> 00:31:06,255
(hip-hop music continues)
696
00:31:06,298 --> 00:31:09,040
♫ What do ladies say?
Ladies, what do ladies say? ♫
697
00:31:09,084 --> 00:31:10,737
♫ Ladies, what
do ladies say? ♫
698
00:31:10,781 --> 00:31:12,870
♫ "Yeah, Dogg
We got your back" ♫
699
00:31:12,914 --> 00:31:14,306
♫ What my homies
say, homies? ♫
700
00:31:14,350 --> 00:31:15,525
♫ Where the gangstas at? ♫
701
00:31:15,568 --> 00:31:17,222
♫ Gangsta bored, gangsta say ♫
702
00:31:17,266 --> 00:31:19,529
♫ "Yeah, Dogg
We got your back" ♫
703
00:31:19,572 --> 00:31:22,662
♫ We own it like we want
it We beat it till we beat it ♫
704
00:31:22,706 --> 00:31:24,882
♫ And only you can give it to
us 'Cause you know we need it ♫
705
00:31:24,926 --> 00:31:26,318
GOMEZ: It!
706
00:31:26,362 --> 00:31:29,539
Good to see you, my
bewhiskered cousin.
707
00:31:29,582 --> 00:31:32,063
-You made it.
-(babbling)
708
00:31:32,107 --> 00:31:35,153
Mm. It's in Florida
for spring break.
709
00:31:35,197 --> 00:31:38,026
Ghouls Gone Wild,
am I right? (laughs)
710
00:31:38,069 --> 00:31:39,331
He's going to
join us on our trip.
711
00:31:39,375 --> 00:31:40,811
Hold on.
712
00:31:40,854 --> 00:31:42,856
He's coming in the camper?
713
00:31:42,900 --> 00:31:44,728
We're cramped enough as it is.
714
00:31:44,771 --> 00:31:46,730
And he sheds, Morticia.
715
00:31:46,773 --> 00:31:48,688
Oh, Fester, he's family.
716
00:31:48,732 --> 00:31:50,560
The more the hairier.
717
00:31:50,603 --> 00:31:53,302
FESTER: Well, if he's allowed
on the couch, then so am I!
718
00:31:55,391 --> 00:31:57,567
-(folk music playing)
-(snoring)
719
00:31:59,221 --> 00:32:01,136
-(thud)
-(Pugsley groans)
720
00:32:01,179 --> 00:32:02,398
(mumbling) No, no, no!
721
00:32:02,441 --> 00:32:03,877
I said cut the red wire.
722
00:32:04,356 --> 00:32:06,010
(grunts)
723
00:32:06,054 --> 00:32:09,405
I can't believe Taylor
Swift wants to date me.
724
00:32:09,448 --> 00:32:11,146
(chuckles) Me.
725
00:32:11,189 --> 00:32:12,930
Make sure to close the door
726
00:32:12,974 --> 00:32:16,629
when you go into
outer space. (groans)
727
00:32:16,673 --> 00:32:21,808
Yes, Beyonce, I would love
to share my ham with you.
728
00:32:21,852 --> 00:32:23,419
(on speakers) ♫ With
a load of iron ore ♫
729
00:32:23,462 --> 00:32:25,638
-♫ 26,000 tons more
♫ -(moaning softly)
730
00:32:25,682 --> 00:32:28,554
♫ Than the Edmund
Fitzgerald Weighed empty ♫
731
00:32:31,688 --> 00:32:34,908
♫ That good ship and true
Was a bone to be chewed ♫
732
00:32:34,952 --> 00:32:38,825
(distorting) ♫ When the gales
Of November came early ♫
733
00:32:41,132 --> 00:32:43,091
♫ The ship was the pride ♫
734
00:32:43,134 --> 00:32:44,918
-♫ Of the American
side ♫ -(car horn blares)
735
00:32:44,962 --> 00:32:47,573
♫ Coming back from
some mill In Wisconsin ♫
736
00:32:47,617 --> 00:32:49,271
(slurping)
737
00:32:49,314 --> 00:32:52,404
♫ As the big freighters go
It was bigger than most ♫
738
00:32:52,448 --> 00:32:54,102
-(folk music stops) -♫
One, two, three, go ♫
739
00:32:54,145 --> 00:32:56,365
♫ "Deleter" playing
on speakers ♫
740
00:32:58,323 --> 00:32:59,498
♫ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♫
741
00:32:59,542 --> 00:33:02,458
♫ No, no, no, no ♫
742
00:33:02,501 --> 00:33:05,504
(vocalizing)
743
00:33:05,548 --> 00:33:08,855
♫ All this time I thought
you were a leader ♫
744
00:33:08,899 --> 00:33:11,641
♫ It turns out You're
only a deleter ♫
745
00:33:13,730 --> 00:33:15,558
(It babbling)
746
00:33:15,601 --> 00:33:16,602
(It yelps)
747
00:33:17,081 --> 00:33:19,040
(retching)
748
00:33:21,825 --> 00:33:22,869
(gags)
749
00:33:23,827 --> 00:33:25,655
-(It babbling)
-(retches)
750
00:33:25,698 --> 00:33:27,657
Morticia, I told you so.
751
00:33:27,700 --> 00:33:29,485
There's hairballs everywhere.
752
00:33:29,528 --> 00:33:31,574
(It babbling)
753
00:33:31,617 --> 00:33:34,490
FESTER: Yeah, and
the same to you, fuzzface.
754
00:33:40,583 --> 00:33:42,672
(It babbling)
755
00:33:42,715 --> 00:33:44,500
How could you tell?
756
00:33:44,543 --> 00:33:46,719
(babbling)
757
00:33:51,376 --> 00:33:55,467
Did it ever bother you
that you were so different
758
00:33:55,511 --> 00:33:57,382
from the rest of the family?
759
00:33:57,426 --> 00:33:59,080
(babbling)
760
00:34:00,081 --> 00:34:01,691
A rebellious phase?
761
00:34:01,734 --> 00:34:03,519
(babbling)
762
00:34:05,086 --> 00:34:08,959
You shaved your entire
body as a teenager?
763
00:34:09,002 --> 00:34:10,091
(babbling)
764
00:34:12,876 --> 00:34:16,749
Oh. So that's what changed.
765
00:34:16,793 --> 00:34:18,708
You owned who you were.
766
00:34:19,361 --> 00:34:21,667
(babbling)
767
00:34:21,711 --> 00:34:23,800
That's the problem.
768
00:34:23,843 --> 00:34:25,584
I don't know who I am.
769
00:34:27,282 --> 00:34:28,326
(ringtone playing) ♫
Drop it like it's hot ♫
770
00:34:28,370 --> 00:34:29,849
♫ Drop it like it's hot ♫
771
00:34:29,893 --> 00:34:32,635
-(babbling) -GRANDMA:
Get over here ASAP.
772
00:34:32,678 --> 00:34:34,898
I went too far this time
and things are getting hairy!
773
00:34:34,941 --> 00:34:36,160
No offense.
774
00:34:44,951 --> 00:34:46,518
-Let's do this!
-(growls)
775
00:34:49,217 --> 00:34:50,174
-(horn blares) -(Mr.
Mustela screams)
776
00:34:53,786 --> 00:34:55,788
It's that lawyer, Gomez.
777
00:34:55,832 --> 00:34:57,225
He's found us again.
778
00:34:57,268 --> 00:34:59,009
He wants what we have.
779
00:34:59,052 --> 00:35:01,359
Well, he won't get her.
780
00:35:01,403 --> 00:35:02,795
-(Pugsley chomping)
-Good, Pugsley.
781
00:35:02,839 --> 00:35:04,580
Right this way.
782
00:35:06,408 --> 00:35:08,366
How about a fun
family travel game?
783
00:35:08,410 --> 00:35:09,715
Everyone around the table.
784
00:35:09,759 --> 00:35:10,977
WEDNESDAY: Ugh.
785
00:35:11,021 --> 00:35:12,936
-(engine revving)
-(Mr. Mustela yelping)
786
00:35:17,506 --> 00:35:19,986
(whimpering)
787
00:35:22,902 --> 00:35:23,947
-(yelps)
-(Pongo growls)
788
00:35:23,990 --> 00:35:26,036
(tires screeching)
789
00:35:27,080 --> 00:35:28,212
(growls)
790
00:35:29,213 --> 00:35:30,867
(Mr. Mustela grunts)
791
00:35:30,910 --> 00:35:32,173
So, what shall we play?
792
00:35:34,392 --> 00:35:36,351
How about Punch Buggy?
793
00:35:36,394 --> 00:35:37,787
Punch...
794
00:35:38,831 --> 00:35:40,790
-(Mr. Mustela yelps)
-...buggy.
795
00:35:40,833 --> 00:35:42,574
(both grunting)
796
00:35:42,618 --> 00:35:43,401
(Mr. Mustela yelps)
797
00:35:45,751 --> 00:35:47,144
-(screams)
-(Pongo growls)
798
00:35:47,188 --> 00:35:48,711
(manure squelches)
799
00:35:48,754 --> 00:35:49,973
(cow moos)
800
00:35:53,933 --> 00:35:55,021
We need to step on it.
801
00:35:55,065 --> 00:35:56,588
And we'll need a place to hide.
802
00:35:56,632 --> 00:35:58,677
I have just the place, querida.
803
00:36:00,201 --> 00:36:01,898
-Thing, turn here.
-(tires screech)
804
00:36:02,768 --> 00:36:03,465
FESTER: Look out!
805
00:36:06,685 --> 00:36:08,034
(both yell)
806
00:36:08,078 --> 00:36:10,080
(horns blaring)
807
00:36:25,791 --> 00:36:27,793
You sure this is
the right place, Pop?
808
00:36:27,837 --> 00:36:29,273
Yes, son.
809
00:36:29,317 --> 00:36:32,494
The Alamo.
810
00:36:32,537 --> 00:36:36,324
You can sense that
many lives were lost here.
811
00:36:36,367 --> 00:36:39,283
Let us take a moment
to pay our respects.
812
00:36:42,460 --> 00:36:44,332
-(engine roaring)
-(horn beeps)
813
00:36:46,769 --> 00:36:48,553
(gasps) Okay. Enough respect.
814
00:36:48,597 --> 00:36:49,728
Everyone in!
815
00:36:57,823 --> 00:36:59,695
-(doorbell tinkles)
-(gasps)
816
00:36:59,738 --> 00:37:02,350
Look at y'all's costumes!
817
00:37:02,393 --> 00:37:03,829
(Lurch groaning)
818
00:37:03,873 --> 00:37:06,963
You guys are a little early
for the Halloween pageant.
819
00:37:07,006 --> 00:37:11,141
Today, we're on the hunt for our
next Little Miss Jalapeno Pepper.
820
00:37:11,184 --> 00:37:12,751
(country music
playing on speakers)
821
00:37:12,795 --> 00:37:13,970
(muffled knocking)
822
00:37:14,013 --> 00:37:15,276
MR. MUSTELA: Hello? Wednesday!
823
00:37:15,319 --> 00:37:16,929
-(Gomez gasps)
-Wednesday Addams!
824
00:37:16,973 --> 00:37:19,715
Are you in there? Hello?
825
00:37:19,758 --> 00:37:22,413
(in Southern accent)
Well, burn my biscuits.
826
00:37:22,457 --> 00:37:24,981
This here's our
little tumbleweed.
827
00:37:25,024 --> 00:37:27,679
And she's a-fixin'
to be the Lone Star
828
00:37:27,723 --> 00:37:30,160
-of this here rodeo!
-What?
829
00:37:30,203 --> 00:37:31,814
Well, in that case,
830
00:37:31,857 --> 00:37:34,773
we better get you
all gussied up, hon.
831
00:37:34,817 --> 00:37:37,950
Father, this will
not end well for you.
832
00:37:39,778 --> 00:37:41,476
-MR. MUSTELA: Wednesday!
-(knocking continues)
833
00:37:41,519 --> 00:37:44,087
-(Kitty growls) -(Mr.
Mustela exclaims)
834
00:37:44,130 --> 00:37:45,828
Gomez, what are you doing?
835
00:37:45,871 --> 00:37:48,483
(in normal voice)
Just follow my lead.
836
00:37:48,526 --> 00:37:51,181
(in Southern accent)
Howdy. We're oil tycoons.
837
00:37:51,224 --> 00:37:54,053
Oil tycoons? How can I... Eesh!
838
00:37:54,097 --> 00:37:56,012
We're a-fixin' to find ourselves
839
00:37:56,055 --> 00:37:59,363
some fancy new Texas threads.
840
00:37:59,407 --> 00:38:01,060
Will this be enough to cover it?
841
00:38:01,104 --> 00:38:02,932
(bell dings)
842
00:38:02,975 --> 00:38:04,760
-(gasps) Mm.
-(indistinct chatter)
843
00:38:04,803 --> 00:38:06,544
-(spray hissing)
-(girl 1 giggles)
844
00:38:06,588 --> 00:38:08,154
(girl 1) Yeah! Check it out!
845
00:38:08,198 --> 00:38:10,069
(woman) Now just
hold still, sweetie.
846
00:38:10,113 --> 00:38:11,332
(girl 2) Make it tighter.
847
00:38:12,811 --> 00:38:13,943
(girl 3) Hi.
848
00:38:13,986 --> 00:38:15,379
What's your talent?
849
00:38:15,423 --> 00:38:17,555
I can read minds.
850
00:38:17,599 --> 00:38:18,817
(scoffs) No, you can't.
851
00:38:20,210 --> 00:38:22,212
Yes, I can.
852
00:38:22,255 --> 00:38:23,996
(girl 3 gasps) This
isn't really happening.
853
00:38:24,040 --> 00:38:25,955
It is really happening.
854
00:38:25,998 --> 00:38:27,522
(girl 3) Think of a
number. Uh, number seven.
855
00:38:27,565 --> 00:38:29,132
-Seven.
-(gasps)
856
00:38:29,175 --> 00:38:30,612
-Uh, purple.
-Purple.
857
00:38:30,655 --> 00:38:31,743
My worst nightmare.
858
00:38:31,787 --> 00:38:33,571
Hippopotamus riding a bicycle.
859
00:38:33,615 --> 00:38:34,964
What's your name?
860
00:38:35,007 --> 00:38:37,009
-Wednesday, what's yours?
-I don't wanna tell you.
861
00:38:38,271 --> 00:38:39,447
(in deep voice) Hello, Peggy.
862
00:38:39,925 --> 00:38:42,058
(screaming)
863
00:38:42,101 --> 00:38:43,276
(in normal voice) I know.
864
00:38:43,320 --> 00:38:44,843
Just give me the trophy already.
865
00:38:48,978 --> 00:38:50,240
(audience murmuring)
866
00:38:53,722 --> 00:38:55,854
(Fester imitates horse
neighing, giggles)
867
00:39:01,338 --> 00:39:04,123
I look like Uncle Sam
threw up all over me.
868
00:39:04,167 --> 00:39:06,822
Very good, Pugsley. Blend in.
869
00:39:06,865 --> 00:39:09,085
If you have to interact
with any of the locals,
870
00:39:09,128 --> 00:39:12,915
remember, they're more afraid
of you than you are of them.
871
00:39:12,958 --> 00:39:14,395
(gasps)
872
00:39:15,526 --> 00:39:16,614
(It babbles)
873
00:39:16,658 --> 00:39:18,573
-(boy shudders)
-Oh, my word!
874
00:39:24,448 --> 00:39:26,929
These are the perfect disguises.
875
00:39:26,972 --> 00:39:28,626
It's like we're
invisible. (chuckles)
876
00:39:30,062 --> 00:39:31,368
(audience applauding)
877
00:39:31,412 --> 00:39:33,762
(cheerful piano music playing)
878
00:39:37,287 --> 00:39:38,462
(Wednesday grunts)
879
00:39:40,203 --> 00:39:41,552
(breathing heavily)
880
00:39:43,989 --> 00:39:45,513
We're dead, Gomez.
881
00:39:47,515 --> 00:39:48,951
♫ Are my ribbons tied? ♫
882
00:39:48,994 --> 00:39:51,736
-(Wednesday gasps)
-♫ Is my hair in place? ♫
883
00:39:51,780 --> 00:39:55,305
♫ Have I got a cute
expression On my face? ♫
884
00:39:55,348 --> 00:39:57,307
♫ Are my shoes all shined? ♫
885
00:39:57,350 --> 00:39:58,961
♫ I try to keep in line ♫
886
00:39:59,004 --> 00:40:02,878
♫ When I'm dancing
In the show tonight ♫
887
00:40:02,921 --> 00:40:06,751
♫ Does my shuffle-step
Really look so good? ♫
888
00:40:06,795 --> 00:40:08,187
(Pongo growls)
889
00:40:08,231 --> 00:40:10,363
♫ Am I doing it the way
You think I should? ♫
890
00:40:10,407 --> 00:40:14,106
♫ Would it be amiss
If I blew a kiss? ♫
891
00:40:14,150 --> 00:40:17,806
♫ When I'm dancing
In the show tonight ♫
892
00:40:21,244 --> 00:40:25,901
Ah. The only girls I see
here are perfectly normal.
893
00:40:25,944 --> 00:40:29,774
♫ Showtime now
Is getting nearer ♫
894
00:40:29,818 --> 00:40:32,081
♫ And I'm getting scared ♫
895
00:40:32,124 --> 00:40:33,648
(Wednesday yelps, grunts)
896
00:40:33,691 --> 00:40:37,434
♫ Wish I could
see In the mirror ♫
897
00:40:37,478 --> 00:40:40,698
-Ugh!
-♫ If I'm all prepared ♫
898
00:40:40,742 --> 00:40:42,874
♫ First you take a step ♫
899
00:40:42,918 --> 00:40:45,007
-♫ Then you point your
toe ♫ -(Wednesday grunting)
900
00:40:45,050 --> 00:40:48,489
♫ Hope I know it Like
I did a week ago ♫
901
00:40:48,532 --> 00:40:50,752
♫ Am I standing straight? ♫
902
00:40:50,795 --> 00:40:52,188
♫ I can hardly wait ♫
903
00:40:52,231 --> 00:40:54,538
♫ Till I'm dancing
In the show tonight ♫
904
00:40:57,323 --> 00:40:59,500
(girls screaming)
905
00:41:02,459 --> 00:41:04,505
(girls continue screaming)
906
00:41:07,290 --> 00:41:09,814
-Brava! Bravissima!
-(Fester cheering)
907
00:41:09,858 --> 00:41:11,424
Hear, hear! Bella!
908
00:41:12,991 --> 00:41:14,297
There she is!
909
00:41:14,863 --> 00:41:15,994
(gasps)
910
00:41:16,038 --> 00:41:17,779
(in Southern accent) Hey, y'all!
911
00:41:17,822 --> 00:41:21,434
That man right there is one of
the top talent agents in the world!
912
00:41:21,478 --> 00:41:23,741
(shouting excitedly in Spanish)
913
00:41:23,785 --> 00:41:25,395
(Mr. Mustela yells and grunts)
914
00:41:25,438 --> 00:41:27,005
-(girl) What?
-(all screaming)
915
00:41:29,094 --> 00:41:30,966
(bell jingling)
916
00:41:31,009 --> 00:41:37,668
(drawn out) You rang?
917
00:41:39,061 --> 00:41:40,366
Quick, Lurch.
918
00:41:40,410 --> 00:41:42,020
-Grab Wednesday.
-(grunts)
919
00:41:45,763 --> 00:41:47,591
(people yelping)
920
00:41:53,902 --> 00:41:55,904
(imitates horse
neighing, giggles)
921
00:42:02,824 --> 00:42:03,955
MR. MUSTELA: Help!
922
00:42:03,999 --> 00:42:05,043
Pongo!
923
00:42:08,569 --> 00:42:10,396
-(Fester grunting)
-(Pugsley yelps)
924
00:42:11,267 --> 00:42:12,442
FESTER: Hello. Hi.
925
00:42:12,485 --> 00:42:13,791
(tires screeching)
926
00:42:15,488 --> 00:42:17,795
(grunts) I'll find you,
Wednesday Addams!
927
00:42:23,975 --> 00:42:27,631
You have traumatized
me beyond all recognition.
928
00:42:27,675 --> 00:42:29,241
She looks the same to me.
929
00:42:29,285 --> 00:42:31,113
Who is that man?
930
00:42:31,156 --> 00:42:33,071
I know he's not a talent agent.
931
00:42:33,115 --> 00:42:35,596
He's the same man
who came to the house.
932
00:42:37,336 --> 00:42:39,338
You're right. (sighs)
933
00:42:39,382 --> 00:42:41,950
You're far too clever for us to
pull the wool over your eyes.
934
00:42:43,081 --> 00:42:44,648
That man
935
00:42:44,692 --> 00:42:47,477
-is a door-to-door salesman.
-Gomez.
936
00:42:47,520 --> 00:42:49,392
And what is he selling?
937
00:42:49,435 --> 00:42:51,394
Uh... Tupperware?
938
00:42:51,437 --> 00:42:53,222
Knives? Makeup.
939
00:42:53,265 --> 00:42:55,050
Uh... Uh, frozen steaks.
940
00:42:55,093 --> 00:42:57,400
Life insurance for cows.
941
00:42:57,443 --> 00:42:58,619
Uh, they need it.
942
00:42:58,662 --> 00:43:01,404
The steak industry
is, oh, brutal.
943
00:43:02,971 --> 00:43:04,450
Okay.
944
00:43:04,494 --> 00:43:06,670
If that's the way
you want to play it.
945
00:43:06,714 --> 00:43:09,020
I'm going to go give
Pugsley a haircut.
946
00:43:09,064 --> 00:43:10,326
I think he's taking a nap.
947
00:43:11,283 --> 00:43:12,633
WEDNESDAY: Exactly.
948
00:43:13,851 --> 00:43:14,765
That was easy.
949
00:43:19,727 --> 00:43:21,642
♫ "Lonesome Loser"
playing on speaker ♫
950
00:43:21,685 --> 00:43:25,123
♫ You can't run and hide ♫
951
00:43:25,167 --> 00:43:29,606
♫ Have you heard About
the lonesome loser? ♫
952
00:43:29,650 --> 00:43:33,741
♫ Beaten by the queen
of hearts Every time ♫
953
00:43:33,784 --> 00:43:36,657
(Lurch groans)
954
00:43:36,700 --> 00:43:39,572
I'm not sure
Wednesday believed us.
955
00:43:39,616 --> 00:43:42,227
I'm sure she would have
said something if she didn't.
956
00:43:42,271 --> 00:43:45,187
If there's one thing we can count
on Wednesday for, it's honesty.
957
00:43:45,230 --> 00:43:48,146
She certainly lets me know
when I'm embarrassing her
958
00:43:48,190 --> 00:43:49,408
or hovering
959
00:43:49,452 --> 00:43:51,628
-or being uncool.
-(metal clicks)
960
00:43:51,672 --> 00:43:54,762
(It babbling)
961
00:43:54,805 --> 00:43:57,329
Children are like
socks in the laundry?
962
00:43:57,373 --> 00:44:00,506
They need to be lost
in order to be found?
963
00:44:00,550 --> 00:44:01,899
That's brilliant!
964
00:44:01,943 --> 00:44:03,205
Yes.
965
00:44:03,248 --> 00:44:05,773
We should find a
place, lie low for a while,
966
00:44:05,816 --> 00:44:08,950
and this whole thing
will just blow over.
967
00:44:08,993 --> 00:44:10,908
Lurch, old boy, top it off.
968
00:44:10,952 --> 00:44:12,867
We have places to be.
969
00:44:12,910 --> 00:44:14,303
(song continues on speaker)
970
00:44:14,346 --> 00:44:16,566
(Lurch groaning)
971
00:44:16,609 --> 00:44:18,742
(truck driver screaming)
972
00:44:18,786 --> 00:44:20,788
(gasping)
973
00:44:40,633 --> 00:44:41,896
(blasting)
974
00:44:43,071 --> 00:44:45,116
(yawns and grunts)
975
00:44:45,160 --> 00:44:47,118
Where's Kitty? He needs a walk.
976
00:44:47,162 --> 00:44:48,467
He's asleep.
977
00:44:48,511 --> 00:44:51,775
He and It hit the catnip
pretty hard last night.
978
00:44:51,819 --> 00:44:53,298
(hip-hop music
playing on speaker)
979
00:44:53,342 --> 00:44:54,909
♫ What chu need? I got
a hookup on the plug ♫
980
00:44:56,301 --> 00:44:57,520
FESTER: Ooh!
981
00:44:59,217 --> 00:45:00,305
Uh-oh.
982
00:45:01,437 --> 00:45:03,134
Yeah, I finally got off diapers,
983
00:45:03,178 --> 00:45:04,788
so this is gonna happen.
984
00:45:04,832 --> 00:45:06,398
Gotta go clean myself up.
985
00:45:07,399 --> 00:45:08,574
-(people gasping)
-Pardon me.
986
00:45:08,618 --> 00:45:11,534
Gomez, have you noticed changes
987
00:45:11,577 --> 00:45:13,797
in Fester's body lately?
988
00:45:13,841 --> 00:45:15,799
Hmm. Puberty?
989
00:45:16,626 --> 00:45:18,106
(panting)
990
00:45:19,803 --> 00:45:20,848
(groans)
991
00:45:20,891 --> 00:45:22,763
(grunting)
992
00:45:23,241 --> 00:45:24,416
(straining)
993
00:45:27,985 --> 00:45:29,117
Huh? (grunts)
994
00:45:29,160 --> 00:45:30,205
Oh!
995
00:45:30,248 --> 00:45:31,772
(groans) Huh?
996
00:45:33,251 --> 00:45:34,557
Ow!
997
00:45:34,600 --> 00:45:35,776
Oh!
998
00:45:36,428 --> 00:45:39,040
Huh? (screams)
999
00:45:39,083 --> 00:45:41,390
-(Fester grunting)
-(tentacles slapping)
1000
00:45:41,433 --> 00:45:44,436
FESTER: A little
privacy, please. (groans)
1001
00:45:49,267 --> 00:45:50,486
(Pugsley blows raspberry)
1002
00:45:50,529 --> 00:45:51,835
PUGSLEY: This doesn't
look so grand to me.
1003
00:45:51,879 --> 00:45:53,228
(Wednesday sighs)
1004
00:45:53,271 --> 00:45:55,839
The sheer emptiness.
1005
00:45:55,883 --> 00:46:00,235
Cavernous abyss
of absolutely nothing.
1006
00:46:00,278 --> 00:46:01,758
The vertigo.
1007
00:46:01,802 --> 00:46:03,760
Intoxicating.
1008
00:46:03,804 --> 00:46:05,327
GOMEZ: It's just us,
1009
00:46:05,370 --> 00:46:09,418
the captivating beauty of
the great American outdoors
1010
00:46:09,461 --> 00:46:12,856
and the wonderful
sound of silence.
1011
00:46:12,900 --> 00:46:13,988
(jet whooshing)
1012
00:46:22,083 --> 00:46:23,911
Pugsley, what do I keep saying?
1013
00:46:23,954 --> 00:46:26,522
Amazon Prime is not a toy.
1014
00:46:27,828 --> 00:46:29,003
(tires screeching)
1015
00:46:31,266 --> 00:46:33,050
(muffled hip-hop music playing)
1016
00:46:36,706 --> 00:46:39,709
(babbling)
1017
00:46:39,752 --> 00:46:42,146
GOMEZ: Oh, it's for you. Huh.
1018
00:46:42,190 --> 00:46:44,540
Well, do you really have
to leave us so soon, cousin?
1019
00:46:44,583 --> 00:46:45,933
Where are you headed?
1020
00:46:45,976 --> 00:46:48,239
(babbling)
1021
00:46:48,283 --> 00:46:51,590
I see. Top-secret gig.
1022
00:46:51,634 --> 00:46:55,072
Tell that Billie Eilish she's a
little too sunny for my taste.
1023
00:46:55,116 --> 00:46:56,944
But I'm still a fan.
1024
00:46:57,640 --> 00:46:59,511
(It babbling)
1025
00:47:00,730 --> 00:47:02,036
(continues babbling)
1026
00:47:03,951 --> 00:47:06,518
Why didn't I get
dating advice from him?
1027
00:47:06,562 --> 00:47:07,693
(It babbling)
1028
00:47:20,228 --> 00:47:21,794
I have something for you.
1029
00:47:25,755 --> 00:47:27,757
WEDNESDAY: A tiny coffin.
1030
00:47:27,800 --> 00:47:30,847
I fear I shall have trouble
getting Pugsley in here.
1031
00:47:30,891 --> 00:47:32,414
(chuckles softly) No.
1032
00:47:32,457 --> 00:47:35,069
Open it.
1033
00:47:35,112 --> 00:47:37,898
Your grandmother gave me
this necklace on my wedding day.
1034
00:47:37,941 --> 00:47:39,725
It has been handed down
1035
00:47:39,769 --> 00:47:42,076
through generations
of Addams women.
1036
00:47:42,119 --> 00:47:44,730
It is a part of every Addams.
1037
00:47:44,774 --> 00:47:46,384
Just as you are.
1038
00:47:46,428 --> 00:47:49,561
(thunder rumbles)
1039
00:47:49,605 --> 00:47:51,520
Are you sure this belongs to me?
1040
00:47:52,434 --> 00:47:54,001
Of course, Wednesday.
1041
00:47:54,044 --> 00:47:55,959
Who else would it belong to?
1042
00:47:57,569 --> 00:47:59,049
Never mind.
1043
00:47:59,093 --> 00:48:00,964
Thanks for the trinket, Mother.
1044
00:48:02,444 --> 00:48:03,836
Fire in the hole!
1045
00:48:05,621 --> 00:48:06,622
(people screaming)
1046
00:48:10,191 --> 00:48:11,975
Madison, would you
do me the honor--
1047
00:48:32,648 --> 00:48:34,606
Now, that's grand.
1048
00:48:34,650 --> 00:48:36,608
What was it you were saying
about laying low, darling?
1049
00:48:37,174 --> 00:48:38,523
Hey!
1050
00:48:38,567 --> 00:48:41,483
No more personal
electronic devices on this trip.
1051
00:48:41,526 --> 00:48:43,702
Saddle up, Addams!
1052
00:48:43,746 --> 00:48:45,313
(distant screaming)
1053
00:48:47,489 --> 00:48:48,229
(gasps)
1054
00:48:49,273 --> 00:48:51,972
(bats squeaking)
1055
00:49:06,551 --> 00:49:07,813
(sighs)
1056
00:49:07,857 --> 00:49:08,858
(twig snaps)
1057
00:49:09,728 --> 00:49:11,339
(yelps, screaming)
1058
00:49:12,862 --> 00:49:13,950
(groans)
1059
00:49:13,994 --> 00:49:15,647
(whimpering)
1060
00:49:18,650 --> 00:49:21,044
You scurried
fast, little weasel.
1061
00:49:21,088 --> 00:49:23,003
Please! Let me up!
1062
00:49:23,046 --> 00:49:25,396
Where's your comically
large companion?
1063
00:49:25,440 --> 00:49:29,487
That big ape ran out
on me at the Alamo.
1064
00:49:29,531 --> 00:49:32,099
Please! I'll tell
you everything.
1065
00:49:32,142 --> 00:49:33,926
-(whimpers)
-I'm listening.
1066
00:49:33,970 --> 00:49:36,016
(ringtone playing) ♫
Who can it be now? ♫
1067
00:49:36,059 --> 00:49:37,669
MR. MUSTELA: Oh!
1068
00:49:37,713 --> 00:49:40,281
♫ Who can it be now? ♫
1069
00:49:40,324 --> 00:49:42,370
Mustela, have you
found the girl or...
1070
00:49:42,413 --> 00:49:43,762
Ah.
1071
00:49:43,806 --> 00:49:45,112
You got the drop on him.
1072
00:49:45,721 --> 00:49:47,636
Mr. Strange.
1073
00:49:47,679 --> 00:49:50,421
Please, call me Cyrus.
1074
00:49:50,465 --> 00:49:52,858
Mr. Strange will suffice.
1075
00:49:52,902 --> 00:49:54,556
What is this all about?
1076
00:49:54,599 --> 00:49:57,124
It's about you, Wednesday.
1077
00:49:57,167 --> 00:49:59,952
My wife and I were separated
from our true daughter
1078
00:49:59,996 --> 00:50:02,085
on the night of her birth.
1079
00:50:02,129 --> 00:50:04,740
I never gave up
trying to find her.
1080
00:50:04,783 --> 00:50:07,134
I searched and
searched for years,
1081
00:50:07,177 --> 00:50:10,093
and then, suddenly, there I was,
1082
00:50:10,137 --> 00:50:12,356
standing on that stage.
1083
00:50:12,400 --> 00:50:14,054
Looking right at you.
1084
00:50:14,967 --> 00:50:16,360
In that moment,
1085
00:50:16,404 --> 00:50:20,582
I knew that you were
my long lost child.
1086
00:50:20,625 --> 00:50:22,105
The physical similarities.
1087
00:50:22,149 --> 00:50:25,065
The brilliant scientific mind.
1088
00:50:25,108 --> 00:50:27,284
I did some digging.
1089
00:50:27,328 --> 00:50:29,373
You were born at
the same hospital,
1090
00:50:29,417 --> 00:50:32,028
the same day as
the girl we've raised.
1091
00:50:32,072 --> 00:50:34,683
And as if meant to be,
1092
00:50:34,726 --> 00:50:36,946
your name, Wednesday,
1093
00:50:36,989 --> 00:50:39,340
is from my favorite poem.
1094
00:50:39,383 --> 00:50:40,950
"Wednesday's child is..."
1095
00:50:40,993 --> 00:50:43,170
"Full of woe."
1096
00:50:43,213 --> 00:50:45,346
I was named after that poem.
1097
00:50:45,389 --> 00:50:47,913
I live by it.
1098
00:50:47,957 --> 00:50:49,611
I think we owe it to ourselves
1099
00:50:49,654 --> 00:50:51,830
to get to the bottom
of this, Wednesday.
1100
00:50:51,874 --> 00:50:54,485
Why don't you come to my
home in Sausalito? We can...
1101
00:50:54,529 --> 00:50:56,661
Not so fast.
1102
00:50:56,705 --> 00:50:59,882
I have further research to
conduct to verify your claim.
1103
00:50:59,925 --> 00:51:01,405
Of course.
1104
00:51:01,449 --> 00:51:03,581
I would expect nothing less.
1105
00:51:03,625 --> 00:51:06,018
By the way, what did
you do with Mr. Mustela?
1106
00:51:06,628 --> 00:51:07,803
WEDNESDAY: Oh.
1107
00:51:07,846 --> 00:51:09,152
-I let him go.
-(cell phone beeps)
1108
00:51:18,640 --> 00:51:20,076
(growling softly)
1109
00:51:20,120 --> 00:51:21,512
(wind whistling)
1110
00:51:27,431 --> 00:51:29,694
(Gomez snoring softly)
1111
00:51:38,355 --> 00:51:40,009
(Gomez chuckling, grunts)
1112
00:51:40,052 --> 00:51:41,141
(groans)
1113
00:51:44,579 --> 00:51:45,797
(grunts)
1114
00:51:48,844 --> 00:51:50,628
(moaning)
1115
00:51:50,672 --> 00:51:51,847
(grunts, coughs)
1116
00:51:51,890 --> 00:51:53,762
(moans and snores)
1117
00:51:53,805 --> 00:51:55,546
(both grunting)
1118
00:51:56,678 --> 00:52:00,203
Tish. You minx.
1119
00:52:00,247 --> 00:52:01,552
(Gomez chuckles)
1120
00:52:05,687 --> 00:52:07,167
Let's settle this.
1121
00:52:45,117 --> 00:52:47,424
It's all true.
1122
00:52:49,209 --> 00:52:53,691
The facts before me prove
beyond a reasonable doubt
1123
00:52:53,735 --> 00:52:56,346
that I am not an Addams.
1124
00:52:56,390 --> 00:52:59,697
That means there's
only one logical choice.
1125
00:52:59,741 --> 00:53:01,308
Don't you agree?
1126
00:53:01,351 --> 00:53:02,657
(Lurch groans)
1127
00:53:08,576 --> 00:53:09,620
MORTICIA: Wednesday, dear.
1128
00:53:11,796 --> 00:53:13,624
Come along, sleepyhead.
1129
00:53:17,541 --> 00:53:19,413
Why, it's easier
to wake the dead
1130
00:53:19,456 --> 00:53:20,979
than to wake you, my little...
1131
00:53:21,023 --> 00:53:22,067
(muffled grunting)
1132
00:53:22,111 --> 00:53:23,286
(muffled) Hi, Mom.
1133
00:53:25,157 --> 00:53:26,333
PUGSLEY: "Dear Addams family,
1134
00:53:26,376 --> 00:53:27,725
As you may have noticed,
1135
00:53:27,769 --> 00:53:31,076
our family dynamic
has been off-base lately.
1136
00:53:31,120 --> 00:53:32,948
I have been ruminating on
1137
00:53:32,991 --> 00:53:34,993
and questioning
the reason for this,
1138
00:53:35,037 --> 00:53:38,910
but a new revelation has
resolved this doubt for me.
1139
00:53:38,954 --> 00:53:40,085
I was the discordant note..."
1140
00:53:40,129 --> 00:53:41,217
WEDNESDAY: "I
was the discordant note
1141
00:53:41,261 --> 00:53:44,438
that can never
resolve into harmony.
1142
00:53:44,481 --> 00:53:47,179
And the reason I could
never truly relate to any of you
1143
00:53:47,832 --> 00:53:49,921
is simple.
1144
00:53:49,965 --> 00:53:52,489
I am not your relative.
1145
00:53:54,404 --> 00:53:57,755
I have no recourse
but to leave for good
1146
00:53:57,799 --> 00:54:01,803
and make my way
toward the truth.
1147
00:54:01,846 --> 00:54:03,848
Do not attempt to follow me."
1148
00:54:08,331 --> 00:54:09,376
Wait.
1149
00:54:09,419 --> 00:54:11,378
Wednesday's not an Addams?
1150
00:54:11,421 --> 00:54:13,945
I'm the only real Addams child?
1151
00:54:13,989 --> 00:54:15,382
That's awesome!
1152
00:54:15,425 --> 00:54:18,602
Too soon, Pugsley. Too soon.
1153
00:54:18,646 --> 00:54:20,125
-(cleaver thuds)
-What does she mean,
1154
00:54:20,169 --> 00:54:21,518
"making her way
toward the truth"?
1155
00:54:21,562 --> 00:54:23,564
Is this about the hospital thing
1156
00:54:23,607 --> 00:54:25,392
that was totally not a big deal?
1157
00:54:25,435 --> 00:54:27,611
-This is all my fault.
-(Pugsley gasps)
1158
00:54:27,655 --> 00:54:30,310
(sighs) If she had
just felt closer to me,
1159
00:54:30,353 --> 00:54:32,137
maybe this wouldn't
have happened.
1160
00:54:32,181 --> 00:54:34,183
Thing! I need a Bloody Mary.
1161
00:54:34,226 --> 00:54:35,402
Make it a double.
1162
00:54:35,445 --> 00:54:36,838
FESTER: He's in the shower.
1163
00:54:36,881 --> 00:54:39,797
♫ La-di-di, la-di-da ♫
1164
00:54:39,841 --> 00:54:42,234
Don't forget to clean
behind your knuckles.
1165
00:54:51,331 --> 00:54:53,333
(birds chirping)
1166
00:55:02,124 --> 00:55:04,953
WEDNESDAY: Lurch, I can see you.
1167
00:55:04,996 --> 00:55:06,781
(Lurch grunts softly)
1168
00:55:06,824 --> 00:55:09,174
Obviously, I have
failed in my duty
1169
00:55:09,218 --> 00:55:11,089
as your lurking advisor.
1170
00:55:11,133 --> 00:55:13,875
(Lurch groans)
1171
00:55:13,918 --> 00:55:17,226
I really don't know
how to answer that.
1172
00:55:17,269 --> 00:55:21,622
But what I do know is that you
should go back to your family.
1173
00:55:21,665 --> 00:55:24,625
It's time for me to find mine.
1174
00:55:24,668 --> 00:55:26,366
(groans lowly)
1175
00:55:27,018 --> 00:55:29,020
I guess that's true.
1176
00:55:29,064 --> 00:55:31,893
You're not an Addams either.
1177
00:55:31,936 --> 00:55:34,243
(sighs) How very sad that is.
1178
00:55:34,286 --> 00:55:35,984
(Lurch moans)
1179
00:55:36,027 --> 00:55:37,855
Much better, Lurch.
1180
00:55:37,899 --> 00:55:40,205
It appears I taught
you well, after all.
1181
00:55:42,947 --> 00:55:45,297
Like the Donner party before us,
1182
00:55:45,341 --> 00:55:49,345
we travel to California
to fulfil our destiny
1183
00:55:49,389 --> 00:55:52,827
and eat what we
must along the way.
1184
00:55:52,870 --> 00:55:57,005
Let us conquer the
Golden West or die trying.
1185
00:55:57,048 --> 00:55:58,789
Lurch,
1186
00:55:58,833 --> 00:56:00,574
-to Sausalito!
-(crows cawing)
1187
00:56:00,617 --> 00:56:02,880
Thing, to Sausalito!
1188
00:56:02,924 --> 00:56:04,882
If we leave now,
we can catch up.
1189
00:56:04,926 --> 00:56:07,711
Then we'll return home,
kidnap the necessary witnesses
1190
00:56:07,755 --> 00:56:09,626
and snuff out any
remaining doubt
1191
00:56:09,670 --> 00:56:11,411
that Wednesday is one of us.
1192
00:56:11,454 --> 00:56:13,064
I love it when
1193
00:56:13,108 --> 00:56:16,720
your murderous
maternal instincts kick in!
1194
00:56:16,764 --> 00:56:19,070
We're back in the
parenting business!
1195
00:56:19,114 --> 00:56:20,768
Come along, Addams.
1196
00:56:20,811 --> 00:56:22,813
Let's bring Wednesday
back to her family.
1197
00:56:26,904 --> 00:56:32,083
Ahem. Fester, your
tentacles are hanging out.
1198
00:56:32,127 --> 00:56:34,042
I thought I felt a draft.
1199
00:56:34,085 --> 00:56:35,478
Just don't kick 'em.
1200
00:56:35,522 --> 00:56:36,914
They're very sensitive.
1201
00:57:01,983 --> 00:57:02,679
(spider hisses)
1202
00:57:09,599 --> 00:57:12,515
WEDNESDAY: All of those
do sound like great options,
1203
00:57:12,559 --> 00:57:15,344
but which one is the
road to Sausalito?
1204
00:57:15,387 --> 00:57:17,651
♫ "Ace of Spades" playing ♫
1205
00:57:19,043 --> 00:57:20,915
(engines roaring)
1206
00:57:30,228 --> 00:57:31,665
♫ If you like to gamble ♫
1207
00:57:31,708 --> 00:57:33,797
♫ I tell you I'm your man ♫
1208
00:57:33,841 --> 00:57:36,365
♫ You win some, lose
some It's all the same to me ♫
1209
00:57:36,408 --> 00:57:38,323
-(tires screeching) -Out
of my way, Hightower!
1210
00:57:40,456 --> 00:57:41,936
♫ Seven or eleven ♫
1211
00:57:41,979 --> 00:57:43,633
♫ Snake eyes watching you ♫
1212
00:57:45,374 --> 00:57:46,854
Look, Lurch.
1213
00:57:46,897 --> 00:57:50,858
Aggressive people who
use loud noises and fast rides
1214
00:57:50,901 --> 00:57:53,991
to distract themselves
from their childhood trauma.
1215
00:57:54,035 --> 00:57:55,515
Just what we need.
1216
00:57:55,558 --> 00:57:57,691
♫ Take one look and die ♫
1217
00:57:57,734 --> 00:57:59,344
(bikers laughing)
1218
00:58:01,042 --> 00:58:02,783
♫ The only thing you see ♫
1219
00:58:02,826 --> 00:58:06,003
♫ You know it's gonna
be The Ace of Spades ♫
1220
00:58:06,047 --> 00:58:07,396
-(man chuckles) -♫
The Ace of Spades ♫
1221
00:58:10,007 --> 00:58:11,226
(man grunts)
1222
00:58:11,966 --> 00:58:13,533
(door creaking)
1223
00:58:15,447 --> 00:58:17,319
-(both grunt)
-(man) Hmm.
1224
00:58:17,928 --> 00:58:18,668
Huh?
1225
00:58:19,190 --> 00:58:20,191
(door shuts)
1226
00:58:25,936 --> 00:58:27,155
(growls)
1227
00:58:28,025 --> 00:58:29,679
RONNY: Hey!
1228
00:58:29,723 --> 00:58:33,378
Ain't you the guy that almost
ran my bike off the road?
1229
00:58:34,466 --> 00:58:36,947
And you must be Miss Lurleen?
1230
00:58:36,991 --> 00:58:38,949
(all gasp)
1231
00:58:38,993 --> 00:58:40,777
(growls)
1232
00:58:40,821 --> 00:58:42,257
Excuse me?
1233
00:58:43,650 --> 00:58:47,610
Ah. It seems I have
offended two people at once.
1234
00:58:47,654 --> 00:58:48,742
How fortuitous.
1235
00:58:49,830 --> 00:58:51,353
-(bikers) Huh?
-(Miss Lurleen sighs)
1236
00:58:51,396 --> 00:58:53,398
That was an insult too!
1237
00:58:53,442 --> 00:58:55,923
-(bikers gasp)
-(growls)
1238
00:58:55,966 --> 00:58:59,622
I'm afraid you gentlemen
have made a grave error.
1239
00:58:59,666 --> 00:59:02,103
Lurch, show these cretins
1240
00:59:02,146 --> 00:59:05,628
what your cold, dead
hands are capable of.
1241
00:59:05,672 --> 00:59:07,674
LURCH: Mm-hmm.
1242
00:59:11,286 --> 00:59:12,809
(piano playing)
1243
00:59:19,337 --> 00:59:20,817
(singing in high-pitched
voice) ♫ First i was afraid ♫
1244
00:59:20,861 --> 00:59:22,689
♫ I was petrified ♫
1245
00:59:22,732 --> 00:59:26,475
♫ Kept thinking I could never
Live without you by my side ♫
1246
00:59:26,518 --> 00:59:28,303
I should've been more specific.
1247
00:59:28,346 --> 00:59:29,521
LURCH: ♫ But then I
spent so many nights ♫
1248
00:59:29,565 --> 00:59:30,914
♫ Thinking How
you did me wrong ♫
1249
00:59:30,958 --> 00:59:32,786
♫ And I grew strong ♫
1250
00:59:32,829 --> 00:59:35,832
♫ And I learned
How to get along ♫
1251
00:59:37,181 --> 00:59:39,662
(groans)
1252
00:59:39,706 --> 00:59:41,577
-♫ And so you're back ♫ -(gasps)
1253
00:59:41,621 --> 00:59:43,884
-(disco music playing)
-♫ From outer space ♫
1254
00:59:43,927 --> 00:59:46,060
♫ I just walked in
To find you here ♫
1255
00:59:46,103 --> 00:59:48,149
♫ With that sad look
Upon your face ♫
1256
00:59:48,192 --> 00:59:49,933
♫ I should've changed
That stupid lock ♫
1257
00:59:49,977 --> 00:59:52,675
♫ I should've made
you Leave your key ♫
1258
00:59:52,719 --> 00:59:54,503
♫ If I'd known For
just one second ♫
1259
00:59:54,546 --> 00:59:56,113
♫ You'd be back to bother me ♫
1260
00:59:56,157 --> 00:59:58,246
♫ Go on now, go ♫
1261
00:59:58,289 --> 01:00:00,248
♫ Walk out the door ♫
1262
01:00:00,291 --> 01:00:02,250
♫ Just turn around now ♫
1263
01:00:02,293 --> 01:00:03,686
♫ 'Cause you're not
Welcome anymore ♫
1264
01:00:05,514 --> 01:00:08,735
♫ Weren't you the one who
tried To hurt me with goodbye? ♫
1265
01:00:08,778 --> 01:00:10,867
♫ Did you think I'd crumble? ♫
1266
01:00:10,911 --> 01:00:12,608
♫ Did you think I'd
lay down and die? ♫
1267
01:00:12,652 --> 01:00:14,523
♫ Oh, no, not I ♫
1268
01:00:14,566 --> 01:00:16,830
♫ I will survive ♫
1269
01:00:16,873 --> 01:00:19,528
♫ Oh, as long as I
know How to love ♫
1270
01:00:19,571 --> 01:00:21,399
♫ I know I'll stay alive ♫
1271
01:00:21,443 --> 01:00:25,055
♫ I've got all my life to live
I've got all my love to give ♫
1272
01:00:25,099 --> 01:00:28,319
♫ And I'll survive
I will survive ♫
1273
01:00:28,363 --> 01:00:31,322
All I wanted was a
violent roadhouse melee
1274
01:00:31,366 --> 01:00:33,934
before hitching a
ride to Sausalito.
1275
01:00:33,977 --> 01:00:35,675
Was that too much to ask?
1276
01:00:36,110 --> 01:00:37,502
Sausalito?
1277
01:00:37,546 --> 01:00:39,374
That's exactly
where we're headed.
1278
01:00:39,417 --> 01:00:42,072
It's the annual
Hug-A-Biker retreat
1279
01:00:42,116 --> 01:00:44,640
where we deal with
our childhood trauma.
1280
01:00:44,684 --> 01:00:46,555
I am good.
1281
01:00:46,598 --> 01:00:49,340
(laughs) Bring
it in, little lady.
1282
01:00:49,384 --> 01:00:51,081
I accept your offer of a ride.
1283
01:00:51,125 --> 01:00:52,561
But if you don't mind,
1284
01:00:52,604 --> 01:00:55,172
I will respectfully
decline the hug.
1285
01:00:55,216 --> 01:00:57,740
I've been social
distancing since birth.
1286
01:00:57,784 --> 01:00:59,568
(laughs)
1287
01:00:59,611 --> 01:01:01,962
♫ I will survive ♫
1288
01:01:02,005 --> 01:01:04,616
♫ Oh, as long as I
know How to love ♫
1289
01:01:04,660 --> 01:01:06,227
♫ I know I'll stay alive ♫
1290
01:01:06,270 --> 01:01:08,316
♫ I've got All my life to live ♫
1291
01:01:08,359 --> 01:01:11,972
♫ I've got all my love
to give And I'll survive ♫
1292
01:01:12,015 --> 01:01:14,191
♫ I will survive ♫
1293
01:01:14,235 --> 01:01:15,758
♫ Hey, hey ♫
1294
01:01:17,542 --> 01:01:19,066
(disco music continues)
1295
01:01:30,251 --> 01:01:32,470
♫ Hey, hey ♫
1296
01:01:32,514 --> 01:01:34,908
♫ I will survive ♫
1297
01:01:34,951 --> 01:01:37,127
♫ Oh, as long as I
know how to love... ♫
1298
01:01:37,171 --> 01:01:38,868
Sayonara,little lady.
1299
01:01:40,130 --> 01:01:41,871
Whoo-hoo!
1300
01:01:52,839 --> 01:01:55,232
WEDNESDAY: It's
all Jekyll, no Hyde.
1301
01:01:57,495 --> 01:01:59,541
(doorbell blares distortedly)
1302
01:01:59,584 --> 01:02:02,196
I feel something, Lurch.
1303
01:02:02,239 --> 01:02:05,025
As though
anticipation and unease
1304
01:02:05,068 --> 01:02:08,811
birthed some kind of
winged larvae in my stomach.
1305
01:02:09,159 --> 01:02:10,378
(groans)
1306
01:02:10,421 --> 01:02:13,033
Butterflies? Hmm.
1307
01:02:13,076 --> 01:02:15,644
Perhaps my digestive
acids will kill them.
1308
01:02:16,297 --> 01:02:17,559
(door unlocks)
1309
01:02:17,602 --> 01:02:19,779
Wednesday! You're here!
1310
01:02:19,822 --> 01:02:21,737
Welcome home.
1311
01:02:21,781 --> 01:02:24,609
Oh. I see you
brought a plus-one.
1312
01:02:24,653 --> 01:02:26,089
(Lurch groans)
1313
01:02:26,133 --> 01:02:27,395
Which is... (clears throat)
1314
01:02:27,438 --> 01:02:28,744
fine. Perfectly fine.
1315
01:02:28,788 --> 01:02:30,572
Yes. (chuckles nervously)
1316
01:02:30,615 --> 01:02:32,182
(takes deep breath)
1317
01:02:32,226 --> 01:02:33,183
Right this way.
1318
01:02:37,405 --> 01:02:38,885
-(squawks)
-(yells)
1319
01:02:38,928 --> 01:02:40,321
(clears throat)
1320
01:02:40,364 --> 01:02:42,453
Wednesday, meet my wife.
1321
01:02:42,497 --> 01:02:44,194
Ingrid. (chuckles)
1322
01:02:44,238 --> 01:02:47,154
Uh, Ingrid has a
touch of laryngitis
1323
01:02:47,197 --> 01:02:48,677
and finds it difficult to talk
at the moment. (clears throat)
1324
01:02:48,720 --> 01:02:50,287
(girl) Hello.
1325
01:02:50,331 --> 01:02:52,812
And this is Ophelia.
1326
01:02:52,855 --> 01:02:55,815
Or as we call
her, our little Oaf.
1327
01:02:56,685 --> 01:02:57,729
The other...
1328
01:02:58,252 --> 01:02:59,427
...me.
1329
01:03:00,732 --> 01:03:01,864
-(Ingrid squawks)
-Oh.
1330
01:03:01,908 --> 01:03:03,910
Uh, Ingrid, my dear,
1331
01:03:03,953 --> 01:03:06,086
why don't you rest for a while
1332
01:03:06,129 --> 01:03:08,697
and I'll show our little
Wednesday around.
1333
01:03:08,740 --> 01:03:10,568
Let's go see the laboratory.
1334
01:03:10,612 --> 01:03:12,614
-(Ingrid squawks)
-Don't look at them.
1335
01:03:12,657 --> 01:03:14,485
(door whirring)
1336
01:03:14,529 --> 01:03:16,139
Right this way.
1337
01:03:16,183 --> 01:03:17,880
(Muzak playing)
1338
01:03:22,798 --> 01:03:24,887
Welcome to the
future, Wednesday.
1339
01:03:24,931 --> 01:03:26,454
(computers trilling)
1340
01:03:26,497 --> 01:03:28,499
What do you think?
1341
01:03:28,543 --> 01:03:31,285
Pretty boss, huh?
1342
01:03:31,328 --> 01:03:32,852
WEDNESDAY: You've got
a lot of projects in the works.
1343
01:03:34,679 --> 01:03:35,985
Ready, Wednesday?
1344
01:03:36,856 --> 01:03:38,074
(grunts)
1345
01:03:39,946 --> 01:03:42,078
When I did this
DNA test with Ophelia
1346
01:03:42,122 --> 01:03:44,428
and it informed me that
she wasn't my daughter,
1347
01:03:44,472 --> 01:03:46,604
I was unsurprised.
1348
01:03:46,648 --> 01:03:49,520
Perhaps you can
relate to me on that.
1349
01:03:49,564 --> 01:03:51,348
(snickers) You see
what I did there?
1350
01:03:51,392 --> 01:03:52,915
I did,
1351
01:03:52,959 --> 01:03:55,135
though I generally find puns
to be a lower form of humor.
1352
01:03:55,570 --> 01:03:56,832
Hmm.
1353
01:03:56,876 --> 01:04:00,314
My real passion
has always been...
1354
01:04:01,315 --> 01:04:03,273
human behavior.
1355
01:04:03,317 --> 01:04:04,057
(gasps)
1356
01:04:05,014 --> 01:04:07,930
What an incredible coincidence.
1357
01:04:07,974 --> 01:04:11,325
Exactly my thought when I
saw your winning experiment.
1358
01:04:11,368 --> 01:04:13,675
Although, if you think about it,
1359
01:04:13,718 --> 01:04:15,982
not so coincidental.
1360
01:04:16,025 --> 01:04:18,549
Like father, like
daughter. Am I right?
1361
01:04:18,593 --> 01:04:20,987
(laughs awkwardly)
1362
01:04:21,030 --> 01:04:23,293
We will find out shortly.
1363
01:04:23,337 --> 01:04:26,601
And when we receive
the inevitable confirmation,
1364
01:04:26,644 --> 01:04:29,734
I hope you'll reconsider
what you told me at the fair.
1365
01:04:29,778 --> 01:04:31,649
About how your formula
1366
01:04:31,693 --> 01:04:34,130
-was a family secret.
-(computer beeping)
1367
01:04:34,174 --> 01:04:36,393
(automated voice) DNA
sequencing complete.
1368
01:04:37,742 --> 01:04:40,180
DNA match.
1369
01:04:40,223 --> 01:04:42,486
Well, it's all settled.
1370
01:04:42,530 --> 01:04:43,574
Done and...
1371
01:04:43,618 --> 01:04:45,576
(brakes screech)
1372
01:04:45,620 --> 01:04:47,578
-(alarm beeping)
-Great.
1373
01:04:47,622 --> 01:04:49,363
It's my fa... Uh...
1374
01:04:50,277 --> 01:04:52,018
The Addams family.
1375
01:04:52,061 --> 01:04:54,846
(clears throat) Well,
let's go greet them.
1376
01:04:58,850 --> 01:05:00,722
FESTER: You guys go ahead, I...
1377
01:05:01,636 --> 01:05:03,551
I'm gonna be going in, uh...
1378
01:05:04,204 --> 01:05:06,206
I may be some time.
1379
01:05:06,249 --> 01:05:07,729
-(thud)
-(squelching)
1380
01:05:13,778 --> 01:05:15,171
(doorbell rings dully)
1381
01:05:15,215 --> 01:05:16,172
(door beeps)
1382
01:05:17,608 --> 01:05:19,915
(drawn out) You
1383
01:05:19,959 --> 01:05:23,136
rang?
1384
01:05:23,179 --> 01:05:25,355
-Lurch.
-We're here to rescue Wednesday.
1385
01:05:25,399 --> 01:05:26,835
WEDNESDAY: Rescue me from what?
1386
01:05:26,878 --> 01:05:28,010
(Ingrid squawks)
1387
01:05:28,880 --> 01:05:30,273
You!
1388
01:05:30,317 --> 01:05:32,972
Cyrus Strange.
Pleased to meet you.
1389
01:05:33,015 --> 01:05:35,409
You're the man
from the science fair.
1390
01:05:35,452 --> 01:05:37,150
The ghostly apparition.
1391
01:05:38,760 --> 01:05:40,588
Huh.
1392
01:05:40,631 --> 01:05:42,807
I see you've been reanimated.
1393
01:05:42,851 --> 01:05:45,027
And now, you've
absconded with our daughter
1394
01:05:45,071 --> 01:05:46,855
and put her in
this... (gags) In...
1395
01:05:46,898 --> 01:05:48,813
Wednesday, what are you wearing?
1396
01:05:48,857 --> 01:05:50,815
It's called a turtleneck.
1397
01:05:50,859 --> 01:05:52,687
Deceptive name, I know,
1398
01:05:52,730 --> 01:05:55,820
but it is both fashionable
and functional, M...
1399
01:05:56,691 --> 01:05:58,519
Um, Morticia.
1400
01:05:58,562 --> 01:06:01,130
-(gasps) -CYRUS:
Mr. and Mrs. Addams,
1401
01:06:01,174 --> 01:06:03,828
it appears that you are
not Wednesday's parents.
1402
01:06:03,872 --> 01:06:05,047
I am.
1403
01:06:05,091 --> 01:06:07,049
Enough, you knave!
1404
01:06:07,093 --> 01:06:10,661
Mr. Addams, before
you do anything rash,
1405
01:06:10,705 --> 01:06:13,055
you might want to see this.
1406
01:06:13,099 --> 01:06:16,058
The results conclusively prove
1407
01:06:16,102 --> 01:06:19,061
that I am not your daughter.
1408
01:06:20,106 --> 01:06:21,890
Where once I was Addams,
1409
01:06:22,673 --> 01:06:23,935
now I am Strange.
1410
01:06:24,806 --> 01:06:26,112
Zip it, Pugsley.
1411
01:06:26,155 --> 01:06:27,635
This can't be true.
1412
01:06:27,678 --> 01:06:30,333
CYRUS: I know this must
be quite a shock for you,
1413
01:06:30,377 --> 01:06:31,421
Mr. and Mrs. Addams.
1414
01:06:31,465 --> 01:06:32,727
Believe me,
1415
01:06:32,770 --> 01:06:36,122
we went through the
same thing with Ophelia.
1416
01:06:36,165 --> 01:06:37,819
(mud splashing)
1417
01:06:37,862 --> 01:06:39,821
(snorting, grunts)
1418
01:06:42,302 --> 01:06:43,303
Wow!
1419
01:06:46,436 --> 01:06:48,221
(snorts)
1420
01:06:48,264 --> 01:06:51,702
Wednesday, we're
still your family.
1421
01:06:51,746 --> 01:06:53,878
And that's why I'd like to honor
1422
01:06:53,922 --> 01:06:56,272
your contributions to my life
1423
01:06:56,316 --> 01:06:59,971
with a proper and
respectful goodbye.
1424
01:07:01,408 --> 01:07:03,714
Uh, Addams family, I...
1425
01:07:03,758 --> 01:07:05,412
I want to say...
1426
01:07:06,978 --> 01:07:08,415
(sighs)
1427
01:07:08,458 --> 01:07:11,635
It appears I'm not quite
ready to part with them.
1428
01:07:11,679 --> 01:07:13,115
Forgive me, Father.
1429
01:07:13,159 --> 01:07:15,248
I do forgive you.
1430
01:07:15,291 --> 01:07:17,076
Oh, no.
1431
01:07:17,119 --> 01:07:18,816
I meant Cyrus.
1432
01:07:18,860 --> 01:07:21,080
Come on, Wednesday.
You don't mean this.
1433
01:07:21,123 --> 01:07:22,168
Let's just go home.
1434
01:07:22,211 --> 01:07:23,908
We can talk about
this in the camper.
1435
01:07:23,952 --> 01:07:26,128
I'm sorry, Mr. Addams.
1436
01:07:26,172 --> 01:07:28,609
I can't leave with you.
1437
01:07:28,652 --> 01:07:31,046
But maybe we can offer you
1438
01:07:31,090 --> 01:07:33,570
and Mrs. Addams
shelter for the night?
1439
01:07:33,614 --> 01:07:36,269
Then tomorrow we
can say goodbye.
1440
01:07:36,312 --> 01:07:38,358
Of course, daughter.
1441
01:07:38,401 --> 01:07:40,360
My man will show you
to the guest quarters.
1442
01:07:40,751 --> 01:07:42,405
(groans)
1443
01:07:42,449 --> 01:07:43,841
♫ "Happy People" playing ♫
1444
01:07:43,885 --> 01:07:45,887
♫ I want him back ♫
1445
01:07:45,930 --> 01:07:49,804
♫ Shadows I left ♫
1446
01:07:52,111 --> 01:07:57,377
♫ Haunting all the
halls Of our house ♫
1447
01:07:57,986 --> 01:07:59,335
(Ingrid squawks)
1448
01:07:59,379 --> 01:08:04,035
♫ Never tried to be content ♫
1449
01:08:04,079 --> 01:08:05,689
MORTICIA: Something isn't right.
1450
01:08:05,733 --> 01:08:07,213
Of course it's not.
1451
01:08:07,256 --> 01:08:09,476
I've loved Wednesday
her whole life.
1452
01:08:09,519 --> 01:08:11,695
I can't just stop because
a piece of paper says...
1453
01:08:14,785 --> 01:08:15,917
Says...
1454
01:08:21,140 --> 01:08:24,926
Wow. They really
did a lot in six hours.
1455
01:08:24,969 --> 01:08:31,715
♫ With happy people ♫
1456
01:08:33,152 --> 01:08:34,979
Oh, Tish.
1457
01:08:35,023 --> 01:08:37,199
We've lost our little girl.
1458
01:08:37,243 --> 01:08:41,769
♫ I want to be Like
happy people ♫
1459
01:08:41,812 --> 01:08:43,553
(Gomez sobbing)
1460
01:08:45,076 --> 01:08:46,774
-OPHELIA: Hey!
-Wha...
1461
01:08:49,690 --> 01:08:51,518
Come here! (snortles)
1462
01:08:54,260 --> 01:08:55,348
(squeals)
1463
01:08:58,916 --> 01:09:01,180
I thought my bedroom was a mess.
1464
01:09:01,223 --> 01:09:03,617
This is awesome!
1465
01:09:03,660 --> 01:09:05,488
Hey, uh, are you hungry?
1466
01:09:05,532 --> 01:09:07,011
I'm always hungry.
1467
01:09:07,055 --> 01:09:08,448
(squeals) Check it out.
1468
01:09:12,495 --> 01:09:14,062
When my dad's not around,
1469
01:09:14,105 --> 01:09:16,456
I don't use forks or spoons
1470
01:09:17,021 --> 01:09:18,458
or anything.
1471
01:09:18,501 --> 01:09:19,894
(gasps) Me either!
1472
01:09:20,677 --> 01:09:22,592
(both chomping)
1473
01:09:26,770 --> 01:09:29,033
It's a lot easier to
just use your face!
1474
01:09:29,077 --> 01:09:32,123
Just use your face! (snortles)
1475
01:09:32,167 --> 01:09:33,821
Where have you been all my life?
1476
01:09:33,864 --> 01:09:35,388
The farm.
1477
01:09:36,563 --> 01:09:37,651
Wait, what did you say?
1478
01:09:38,217 --> 01:09:39,392
(squeals)
1479
01:09:39,435 --> 01:09:40,393
(screams)
1480
01:09:41,959 --> 01:09:45,180
MORTICIA: Cyrus Strange
is lying. I'm sure of it.
1481
01:09:45,224 --> 01:09:46,529
But how do we prove
it to Wednesday that...
1482
01:09:46,573 --> 01:09:48,270
Oh, querida.
1483
01:09:48,314 --> 01:09:49,663
It's no use.
1484
01:09:49,706 --> 01:09:51,099
Wednesday has gone.
1485
01:09:51,142 --> 01:09:54,189
And now, we must do our duty.
1486
01:09:54,233 --> 01:09:56,409
We shall raise
the pig girl and...
1487
01:09:56,452 --> 01:09:58,106
Pull yourself together, Gomez.
1488
01:09:58,149 --> 01:09:59,629
You're an Addams.
1489
01:09:59,673 --> 01:10:01,414
Just as Wednesday is.
1490
01:10:01,457 --> 01:10:03,851
Whether it's in
her blood or not.
1491
01:10:03,894 --> 01:10:05,766
-(door opens)
-PUGSLEY: Mom. Pop.
1492
01:10:05,809 --> 01:10:07,681
You have to see this!
1493
01:10:07,724 --> 01:10:09,248
(Ingrid clucks, squawks)
1494
01:10:10,945 --> 01:10:12,773
-(Ophelia snorts)
-(Ingrid trills)
1495
01:10:12,816 --> 01:10:14,514
What happened to these people?
1496
01:10:14,557 --> 01:10:15,732
PUGSLEY: That's just it!
1497
01:10:15,776 --> 01:10:17,430
I... I don't think
they are people.
1498
01:10:17,473 --> 01:10:19,170
CYRUS: Your idiot boy is right.
1499
01:10:20,389 --> 01:10:21,608
(Ingrid yelps)
1500
01:10:21,651 --> 01:10:24,524
They're animals I
imbued with human traits.
1501
01:10:24,567 --> 01:10:26,830
Pretty neat, huh?
1502
01:10:26,874 --> 01:10:30,486
They always revert back
to their original form, though.
1503
01:10:30,530 --> 01:10:32,532
So that's why you
wanted Wednesday.
1504
01:10:32,575 --> 01:10:35,752
Her experiment did
what you couldn't.
1505
01:10:35,796 --> 01:10:39,016
Men. Just can't come out and
ask a woman for help, can you?
1506
01:10:39,060 --> 01:10:40,583
You faked that DNA test.
1507
01:10:40,627 --> 01:10:42,455
Blah, blah, blah, blah!
1508
01:10:42,498 --> 01:10:44,805
Oh, pipe down, Elvira!
1509
01:10:44,848 --> 01:10:48,243
That's it! Prepare to
meet Old Deuteronomy!
1510
01:10:48,287 --> 01:10:49,940
Mazurka!
1511
01:10:51,551 --> 01:10:53,901
(Gomez grunts, coughs)
1512
01:10:56,817 --> 01:10:57,687
(groans)
1513
01:10:58,775 --> 01:11:00,386
(coughing)
1514
01:11:00,429 --> 01:11:02,344
Oh, where are my manners?
1515
01:11:02,388 --> 01:11:04,781
I forgot to thank
you for the tip!
1516
01:11:04,825 --> 01:11:06,914
-(laughs evilly)
-(Morticia groans)
1517
01:11:06,957 --> 01:11:08,394
(body thuds)
1518
01:11:08,437 --> 01:11:10,483
I'm good! I'm so good!
1519
01:11:16,010 --> 01:11:17,359
(lightning crashes)
1520
01:11:28,152 --> 01:11:29,502
So sorry about that.
1521
01:11:29,545 --> 01:11:30,981
(clears throat) Where were we?
1522
01:11:31,025 --> 01:11:32,722
I have a surprise
for you, Father.
1523
01:11:33,854 --> 01:11:34,898
(chuckles excitedly)
1524
01:11:34,942 --> 01:11:36,987
Yes. Yes! Of course!
1525
01:11:37,031 --> 01:11:38,902
It's so simple. (chuckles)
1526
01:11:40,034 --> 01:11:42,166
But... But could it work?
1527
01:11:44,168 --> 01:11:45,648
(keypad beeping)
1528
01:11:45,692 --> 01:11:47,171
(computer trilling)
1529
01:11:47,215 --> 01:11:48,390
(beeps)
1530
01:11:48,434 --> 01:11:50,087
You did it!
1531
01:11:50,131 --> 01:11:53,352
I knew funding those
science fairs would pay off.
1532
01:11:53,395 --> 01:11:54,875
What was that?
1533
01:11:54,918 --> 01:11:56,572
Uh... Nothing.
1534
01:11:56,616 --> 01:12:00,359
I have a surprise for
you as well, Wednesday.
1535
01:12:00,402 --> 01:12:02,143
(door opening)
1536
01:12:04,798 --> 01:12:08,062
They can be our
first test subjects.
1537
01:12:08,105 --> 01:12:09,933
What have you done?
1538
01:12:09,977 --> 01:12:11,587
I've got all manner
1539
01:12:11,631 --> 01:12:14,503
of diabolical DNA
in these test tubes.
1540
01:12:14,547 --> 01:12:16,810
You can isolate the
Addams' annoying habits
1541
01:12:16,853 --> 01:12:19,769
and we'll replace them
with ones you want.
1542
01:12:19,813 --> 01:12:21,554
But why?
1543
01:12:21,597 --> 01:12:24,252
I saw you trying to
delay their departure.
1544
01:12:24,295 --> 01:12:27,298
This way, you can
keep them around.
1545
01:12:27,342 --> 01:12:29,213
I need my little
protege to be happy
1546
01:12:29,257 --> 01:12:31,259
and focused on her work.
1547
01:12:31,302 --> 01:12:33,783
This is important stuff
we are doing, Wednesday.
1548
01:12:33,827 --> 01:12:34,915
(laughs)
1549
01:12:34,958 --> 01:12:37,091
World-changing!
1550
01:12:37,134 --> 01:12:38,571
"World-changing"?
1551
01:12:38,614 --> 01:12:40,355
If you could control people,
1552
01:12:40,399 --> 01:12:43,793
Imbue them with the strength
and ferocity of any animal on earth?
1553
01:12:43,837 --> 01:12:46,056
Imagine who would pay for that!
1554
01:12:46,100 --> 01:12:48,494
The military,
foreign governments,
1555
01:12:48,537 --> 01:12:50,147
call centers.
1556
01:12:50,191 --> 01:12:52,846
They'd all want unstoppable
hybrid murder machines
1557
01:12:52,889 --> 01:12:55,414
programmed down
to the cellular level!
1558
01:12:55,457 --> 01:12:59,330
Imagine how rich and
famous we'll become!
1559
01:12:59,374 --> 01:13:03,596
All thanks to your experiment!
(laughing maniacally)
1560
01:13:03,639 --> 01:13:05,467
But I only meant to show
1561
01:13:05,511 --> 01:13:08,078
how my Uncle Fester's
intellect could be improved.
1562
01:13:08,122 --> 01:13:11,908
And now you get to improve
the rest of your ex-family.
1563
01:13:11,952 --> 01:13:13,649
(Cyrus laughs wickedly)
1564
01:13:14,911 --> 01:13:16,086
WEDNESDAY: But they
don't need improving.
1565
01:13:16,130 --> 01:13:18,306
They're fine as they are.
1566
01:13:19,350 --> 01:13:21,396
Except for maybe Pugsley.
1567
01:13:21,440 --> 01:13:24,791
But I'm the one who
was looking for change,
1568
01:13:24,834 --> 01:13:26,183
not them.
1569
01:13:26,227 --> 01:13:27,968
But this way, you'll
never have to feel different
1570
01:13:28,011 --> 01:13:31,101
from anyone in your family
ever again, little boo-boo.
1571
01:13:31,145 --> 01:13:32,842
(alarm blaring)
1572
01:13:34,322 --> 01:13:36,498
(system trilling, chimes)
1573
01:13:38,761 --> 01:13:41,285
(liquid bubbling)
1574
01:13:43,462 --> 01:13:45,289
Here you are, Wednesday.
1575
01:13:45,333 --> 01:13:47,248
You do the honors.
1576
01:13:47,291 --> 01:13:48,902
(system beeping)
1577
01:13:49,859 --> 01:13:51,774
I won't!
1578
01:13:51,818 --> 01:13:54,603
Even though you are
biologically my father,
1579
01:13:54,647 --> 01:13:58,085
these people
are still my family.
1580
01:13:58,128 --> 01:14:01,523
The Addams family.
1581
01:14:01,567 --> 01:14:05,266
Fine. If you can't pull
the trigger, I'll do it!
1582
01:14:05,919 --> 01:14:07,094
(buzzes)
1583
01:14:07,137 --> 01:14:08,225
(powering up)
1584
01:14:08,269 --> 01:14:09,705
(laughs evilly)
1585
01:14:15,929 --> 01:14:18,497
(Cyrus laughing maniacally)
1586
01:14:20,063 --> 01:14:22,588
I'm disappointed
in you, Wednesday.
1587
01:14:22,631 --> 01:14:26,679
But it appears you're just a
silly little girl playing with science.
1588
01:14:28,768 --> 01:14:30,683
(laughs maliciously)
1589
01:14:31,727 --> 01:14:34,556
Turn off the
machine, Mr. Strange.
1590
01:14:35,252 --> 01:14:37,167
I won't ask you again.
1591
01:14:37,211 --> 01:14:38,517
(lightning crashes)
1592
01:14:38,560 --> 01:14:39,822
CYRUS: Aw!
1593
01:14:39,866 --> 01:14:42,172
Is little lady threatening me?
1594
01:14:42,216 --> 01:14:43,565
That depends.
1595
01:14:43,609 --> 01:14:45,741
Do you have a piano nearby?
1596
01:14:45,785 --> 01:14:48,352
Why would I have a
piano in a laboratory?
1597
01:14:48,396 --> 01:14:51,355
In that case, Lurch...
1598
01:14:51,399 --> 01:14:52,574
(Lurch growls)
1599
01:14:52,618 --> 01:14:55,403
...show this cretin
what your cold,
1600
01:14:55,446 --> 01:14:58,014
-dead hands are capable of.
-(Cyrus chuckles)
1601
01:14:58,058 --> 01:14:59,363
You think you're the only one
1602
01:14:59,407 --> 01:15:01,801
with a brainless
Neanderthal bodyguard?
1603
01:15:01,844 --> 01:15:03,542
(laughing wickedly)
1604
01:15:06,675 --> 01:15:10,113
-(growling)
-Kill, Pongo. Kill!
1605
01:15:11,550 --> 01:15:13,029
(growls)
1606
01:15:13,769 --> 01:15:15,379
(roars)
1607
01:15:15,423 --> 01:15:16,946
Oh, this is gonna be rich!
1608
01:15:18,078 --> 01:15:19,949
(Lurch moaning)
1609
01:15:19,993 --> 01:15:20,776
What?
1610
01:15:22,169 --> 01:15:23,344
(both roar)
1611
01:15:23,387 --> 01:15:26,652
Eh! No! Pongo, you imbecile!
1612
01:15:26,695 --> 01:15:29,002
I command you, you protect me.
1613
01:15:29,045 --> 01:15:31,482
You're wasting your breath.
1614
01:15:31,526 --> 01:15:34,703
You see, Pongo and
Lurch are former cellmates
1615
01:15:34,747 --> 01:15:36,879
at the asylum where
Lurch was held captive
1616
01:15:36,923 --> 01:15:38,620
before my parents found him.
1617
01:15:38,664 --> 01:15:40,448
Back in Texas,
1618
01:15:40,491 --> 01:15:45,888
Pongo told Lurch that he
suspected I was in danger.
1619
01:15:45,932 --> 01:15:47,455
-I didn't believe it then.
-CYRUS: Pongo, Pongo.
1620
01:15:47,498 --> 01:15:49,370
Bad boy, Pongo. Bad boy.
1621
01:15:49,413 --> 01:15:51,111
I was wrong.
1622
01:15:51,154 --> 01:15:52,808
-(Pongo growls)
-No! No!
1623
01:15:52,852 --> 01:15:54,331
That's gonna leave a mark.
1624
01:15:54,375 --> 01:15:57,334
Unhand me! (screams)
1625
01:15:57,378 --> 01:15:59,772
Stop! I had a big breakfast.
1626
01:15:59,815 --> 01:16:01,687
Don't make me puke
up my pancakes!
1627
01:16:01,730 --> 01:16:04,167
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
1628
01:16:04,211 --> 01:16:06,300
(Cyrus yells)
1629
01:16:06,343 --> 01:16:08,824
(Cyrus grunting and groaning)
1630
01:16:08,868 --> 01:16:11,000
-(growling)
-(Cyrus whimpering)
1631
01:16:11,044 --> 01:16:12,306
(screaming)
1632
01:16:13,829 --> 01:16:15,091
(electricity crackles)
1633
01:16:19,139 --> 01:16:20,096
(groans)
1634
01:16:21,837 --> 01:16:23,099
(gasping)
1635
01:16:23,143 --> 01:16:24,535
(Cyrus gurgling and choking)
1636
01:16:28,931 --> 01:16:31,020
Mother, Father,
are you all right?
1637
01:16:31,064 --> 01:16:32,456
Yes, yes.
1638
01:16:32,500 --> 01:16:36,243
Fortunately, we escaped
with no fatal wounds.
1639
01:16:39,202 --> 01:16:40,726
Even Pugsley?
1640
01:16:40,769 --> 01:16:42,553
Even Pugsley.
1641
01:16:42,597 --> 01:16:45,208
Oh, well. Maybe next time.
1642
01:16:45,252 --> 01:16:46,819
Wait, what?
1643
01:16:46,862 --> 01:16:49,343
(muffled bleating, squawking)
1644
01:16:50,649 --> 01:16:53,129
(muffled squawk, grunting)
1645
01:16:53,173 --> 01:16:55,218
(roars)
1646
01:16:55,262 --> 01:16:57,525
(laughs maliciously)
1647
01:16:58,569 --> 01:17:00,223
How very...
1648
01:17:00,267 --> 01:17:01,921
(squawks) touching.
1649
01:17:01,964 --> 01:17:03,313
(bleats)
1650
01:17:03,357 --> 01:17:06,142
My real daughter would
know that sentimentality...
1651
01:17:06,186 --> 01:17:07,535
(clucking)
1652
01:17:07,578 --> 01:17:10,103
is the antithesis of science.
1653
01:17:10,146 --> 01:17:11,626
-That's right.
-(gasps)
1654
01:17:11,670 --> 01:17:14,498
I lied about the
DNA... (snorting)
1655
01:17:14,542 --> 01:17:16,109
-re... re...
-(gasps)
1656
01:17:16,152 --> 01:17:17,545
...results.
1657
01:17:17,588 --> 01:17:19,678
-(bleats)
-(Gomez grunts)
1658
01:17:19,721 --> 01:17:22,550
I really should thank
you, Wednesday.
1659
01:17:22,593 --> 01:17:25,074
-(elevator whirring)
-You've uncaged me.
1660
01:17:25,118 --> 01:17:26,902
(snorting)
1661
01:17:26,946 --> 01:17:31,690
But your foul play is no
longer amusing to me.
1662
01:17:34,040 --> 01:17:37,130
So, I think I'll
exterminate you.
1663
01:17:38,348 --> 01:17:39,872
(Lurch and Pongo groan)
1664
01:17:40,960 --> 01:17:43,266
And your entire...
1665
01:17:43,310 --> 01:17:45,181
(clucking) family!
1666
01:17:45,225 --> 01:17:46,356
(grunting)
1667
01:17:49,359 --> 01:17:52,536
Get ready to cry uncle!
1668
01:17:52,580 --> 01:17:53,799
(Cyrus roars)
1669
01:17:54,756 --> 01:17:56,149
(groaning)
1670
01:17:57,716 --> 01:17:58,891
PUGSLEY: Ahh!
1671
01:18:00,022 --> 01:18:01,371
(groaning)
1672
01:18:05,419 --> 01:18:07,638
(burbles, grunts)
1673
01:18:07,682 --> 01:18:09,902
-(growls)
-(Fester grunting)
1674
01:18:11,294 --> 01:18:13,296
GOMEZ: Incoming!
1675
01:18:13,340 --> 01:18:14,297
(Pugsley grunts)
1676
01:18:16,256 --> 01:18:17,518
Ophelia!
1677
01:18:17,561 --> 01:18:18,649
(Cyrus squawks)
1678
01:18:20,086 --> 01:18:21,391
(Fester groans)
1679
01:18:24,481 --> 01:18:26,353
-(Cyrus groans)
-(Ingrid squawks)
1680
01:18:26,396 --> 01:18:28,311
(squealing)
1681
01:18:28,355 --> 01:18:29,791
(whimpering)
1682
01:18:29,835 --> 01:18:31,575
(grunts, gasps)
1683
01:18:32,054 --> 01:18:34,100
(roaring)
1684
01:18:34,143 --> 01:18:35,928
(whimpers)
1685
01:18:35,971 --> 01:18:37,494
GOMEZ: Oh, yeah!
1686
01:18:37,538 --> 01:18:38,757
That's it! You got him!
1687
01:18:44,763 --> 01:18:46,155
CYRUS: No!
1688
01:18:48,592 --> 01:18:49,768
GOMEZ: Get him, Fester!
1689
01:18:49,811 --> 01:18:51,247
Ink him! Ink him, baby!
1690
01:19:00,300 --> 01:19:02,389
Everybody, run!
1691
01:19:02,432 --> 01:19:04,565
(Cyrus whimpering)
1692
01:19:06,393 --> 01:19:08,047
(Cyrus yells)
1693
01:19:09,918 --> 01:19:10,963
(Cyrus squawks)
1694
01:19:17,143 --> 01:19:18,797
(grunting weakly)
1695
01:19:22,104 --> 01:19:23,976
(groaning)
1696
01:19:26,935 --> 01:19:28,284
(sighs exhaustedly)
1697
01:19:28,328 --> 01:19:30,330
Madison, would you
do me the honor...
1698
01:19:30,373 --> 01:19:31,461
(distant mooing)
1699
01:19:36,553 --> 01:19:38,642
(Madison straining)
1700
01:19:38,686 --> 01:19:41,515
Yes, I'll marry you.
1701
01:19:42,516 --> 01:19:44,910
(Fester rumbling weakly)
1702
01:19:44,953 --> 01:19:46,694
Uncle Fester.
1703
01:19:47,869 --> 01:19:49,915
He's dying.
1704
01:19:49,958 --> 01:19:52,134
And it's all my fault.
1705
01:19:52,178 --> 01:19:54,049
Oh, Wednesday.
1706
01:19:58,445 --> 01:19:59,315
(Wednesday sighs)
1707
01:20:02,710 --> 01:20:04,712
Mother, when you
said this necklace
1708
01:20:04,755 --> 01:20:06,670
was a part of every Addams,
1709
01:20:06,714 --> 01:20:08,585
what did you mean?
1710
01:20:08,629 --> 01:20:12,372
It contains a drop of blood from
every Addams born into the family.
1711
01:20:12,415 --> 01:20:15,462
Your father, Pugsley, you...
1712
01:20:16,071 --> 01:20:18,508
And Uncle Fester.
1713
01:20:18,552 --> 01:20:21,163
Your little Addams
DNA cocktail here
1714
01:20:21,207 --> 01:20:22,512
might just save the day.
1715
01:20:22,991 --> 01:20:24,079
Lurch!
1716
01:20:24,123 --> 01:20:26,038
(groans)
1717
01:20:28,997 --> 01:20:30,956
(system powering up)
1718
01:20:45,187 --> 01:20:45,884
(dings)
1719
01:20:49,757 --> 01:20:51,280
Bottoms up, Uncle Fester.
1720
01:20:55,415 --> 01:20:57,721
(Fester groaning)
1721
01:21:04,032 --> 01:21:05,120
Whoa!
1722
01:21:09,168 --> 01:21:10,952
(continues groaning)
1723
01:21:16,349 --> 01:21:18,090
(continues groaning)
1724
01:21:25,619 --> 01:21:26,620
(Morticia gasps)
1725
01:21:30,406 --> 01:21:31,364
(burps)
1726
01:21:32,452 --> 01:21:35,020
(sighs) Did I win?
1727
01:21:35,324 --> 01:21:37,196
Yes.
1728
01:21:37,239 --> 01:21:40,503
-Yes, you did, Uncle Fester.
-(chuckles)
1729
01:21:40,547 --> 01:21:42,157
Oh, and, Pugsley,
1730
01:21:42,201 --> 01:21:44,420
it looks like Ophelia
is feeling better too.
1731
01:21:47,336 --> 01:21:48,424
(gasps)
1732
01:21:49,599 --> 01:21:51,340
(both chuckle excitedly)
1733
01:21:53,473 --> 01:21:56,693
Mother, Father, I'm sorry.
1734
01:21:56,737 --> 01:21:59,392
I didn't want to be an Addams.
1735
01:21:59,435 --> 01:22:02,395
I struggled with
feeling different.
1736
01:22:02,438 --> 01:22:05,833
But now, I realize
that being different
1737
01:22:05,876 --> 01:22:09,097
is the most Addams-y
thing there is.
1738
01:22:09,141 --> 01:22:11,186
"Different" is
what the extra "D"
1739
01:22:11,230 --> 01:22:13,232
in "Addams" stands for.
1740
01:22:13,275 --> 01:22:16,235
I always thought it stood
for "dismemberment."
1741
01:22:17,062 --> 01:22:18,628
Can you forgive me?
1742
01:22:19,368 --> 01:22:20,848
Wednesday,
1743
01:22:20,891 --> 01:22:24,852
you are and always
will be our little ghoul.
1744
01:22:24,895 --> 01:22:26,767
We love you.
1745
01:22:26,810 --> 01:22:28,029
Thank you, Mother.
1746
01:22:28,073 --> 01:22:29,465
The feeling is mutual.
1747
01:22:30,684 --> 01:22:32,077
And, Father...
1748
01:22:32,120 --> 01:22:34,775
Yes, my little raven?
1749
01:22:34,818 --> 01:22:36,646
I have something for you.
1750
01:22:46,134 --> 01:22:49,442
Come on, Addams
family. Let's go home.
1751
01:22:49,485 --> 01:22:50,704
-(Fester chuckles)
-(Lurch groans)
1752
01:22:51,792 --> 01:22:53,315
(electronic dance music playing)
1753
01:22:53,359 --> 01:22:54,360
(excited shouting)
1754
01:23:00,453 --> 01:23:01,584
Gruesome.
1755
01:23:01,628 --> 01:23:04,979
Mmm! And fragrant.
1756
01:23:05,023 --> 01:23:06,720
-(glass shatters)
-(people whooping)
1757
01:23:08,287 --> 01:23:09,897
-(all exclaim excitedly)
-Yeah! Awesome!
1758
01:23:09,940 --> 01:23:11,072
Now, look, look, look.
1759
01:23:11,116 --> 01:23:13,640
All I did was invite
a few people over
1760
01:23:13,683 --> 01:23:15,642
and things got a
little bit out of hand.
1761
01:23:15,685 --> 01:23:18,558
Yes, there were a few
injuries, but the EMT is here.
1762
01:23:18,601 --> 01:23:20,864
They're having a wonderful time.
1763
01:23:20,908 --> 01:23:23,693
What a lovely
homecoming present.
1764
01:23:23,737 --> 01:23:25,869
Oh. (chuckles nervously)
1765
01:23:25,913 --> 01:23:29,047
Welcome home! (laughs)
1766
01:23:29,090 --> 01:23:31,266
(crowd cheering)
1767
01:23:32,702 --> 01:23:35,531
(hip-hop music playing)
1768
01:23:35,575 --> 01:23:38,317
(cackles) I thought
you'd never get here.
1769
01:23:39,579 --> 01:23:40,841
(babbling)
1770
01:23:40,884 --> 01:23:42,973
Oh, my goodness! (shrieks)
1771
01:23:45,585 --> 01:23:48,240
Let's light it up, hairball!
1772
01:23:48,283 --> 01:23:50,155
(babbles)
1773
01:23:50,198 --> 01:23:51,373
♫ You know I never left ♫
1774
01:23:51,417 --> 01:23:52,809
♫ That's how I brought it back ♫
1775
01:23:52,853 --> 01:23:54,985
♫ But what I wanna know
Is where the party at ♫
1776
01:23:55,029 --> 01:23:56,813
♫ I came a long way to get
These people out they seat ♫
1777
01:23:56,857 --> 01:23:58,685
♫ Now I need y'all
To clap your hands ♫
1778
01:23:58,728 --> 01:24:00,121
♫ To the beat And
have a good time ♫
1779
01:24:00,165 --> 01:24:01,905
♫ Don't be acting like that ♫
1780
01:24:01,949 --> 01:24:03,255
♫ We got it crackin'
In the back ♫
1781
01:24:03,298 --> 01:24:04,517
♫ Oh, yeah, it's lit ♫
1782
01:24:04,560 --> 01:24:06,258
♫ My brand-new outfit ♫
1783
01:24:06,301 --> 01:24:07,955
♫ The one to get
The party started ♫
1784
01:24:07,998 --> 01:24:10,262
♫ Plugged and wet
Gloves and mitt, club is lit ♫
1785
01:24:10,305 --> 01:24:11,915
♫ Kind of the one
One of a kind ♫
1786
01:24:11,959 --> 01:24:13,134
♫ It's Cousin It ♫
1787
01:24:13,178 --> 01:24:14,701
♫ He's the host
with the most ♫
1788
01:24:14,744 --> 01:24:17,356
♫ I wanna give a toast To
the wild, wild West Coast ♫
1789
01:24:17,399 --> 01:24:18,531
♫ Now if you're
Feeling like a villain ♫
1790
01:24:18,574 --> 01:24:20,228
♫ Say, "Yeah, yeah" ♫
1791
01:24:20,272 --> 01:24:22,056
♫ Snoop Dogg is in the
house And he's a playa, playa ♫
1792
01:24:22,100 --> 01:24:23,057
♫ And all the
ladies In the house ♫
1793
01:24:23,101 --> 01:24:24,580
♫ Say, "Oh, yeah" ♫
1794
01:24:24,624 --> 01:24:26,495
♫ We're family for sure
In case you didn't know ♫
1795
01:24:26,539 --> 01:24:27,627
♫ It ain't nothin' going on ♫
1796
01:24:27,670 --> 01:24:30,020
We love you, It!
1797
01:24:30,064 --> 01:24:32,762
I still don't understand
a word that guy says.
1798
01:24:32,806 --> 01:24:34,112
(Ophelia and Pugsley laughing)
1799
01:24:35,461 --> 01:24:37,245
Yeah!
1800
01:24:37,289 --> 01:24:41,031
Didn't I tell you this trip would
bring the family closer together?
1801
01:24:41,075 --> 01:24:43,991
You're a wonderful
father, darling.
1802
01:24:44,034 --> 01:24:46,428
There's one thing
that's still troubling me.
1803
01:24:46,472 --> 01:24:48,604
Cyrus lied about
being my father,
1804
01:24:48,648 --> 01:24:51,781
but when I tested your
hair at the Grand Canyon,
1805
01:24:51,825 --> 01:24:55,785
it said conclusively that
you were not my father either.
1806
01:24:55,829 --> 01:24:58,527
Ah, that explains it.
1807
01:24:58,571 --> 01:25:00,007
I suffered a little accident
1808
01:25:00,050 --> 01:25:02,270
with a napalm experiment
a few years back
1809
01:25:02,314 --> 01:25:04,794
and lost my beautiful,
beautiful hair.
1810
01:25:04,838 --> 01:25:06,187
(splutters)
1811
01:25:07,406 --> 01:25:09,756
Had it replaced with
real Sasquatch fur.
1812
01:25:09,799 --> 01:25:11,584
I assure you, Wednesday,
1813
01:25:11,627 --> 01:25:13,107
I am your father.
1814
01:25:13,151 --> 01:25:15,283
Now and always.
1815
01:25:15,979 --> 01:25:17,285
(gasps and groans)
1816
01:25:17,329 --> 01:25:19,505
I already hugged
you once, Father.
1817
01:25:19,548 --> 01:25:21,898
That's quite enough
affection for a lifetime.
1818
01:25:21,942 --> 01:25:23,596
(Gomez laughs)
1819
01:25:24,379 --> 01:25:26,381
Well, Addams,
1820
01:25:26,425 --> 01:25:29,123
time to start planning
the next family vacation.
1821
01:25:29,167 --> 01:25:32,779
Maybe a trip around the
world? What do you say?
1822
01:25:32,822 --> 01:25:35,782
(theme music playing)
1823
01:25:37,044 --> 01:25:38,654
(projector whirring)
1824
01:25:40,787 --> 01:25:42,441
(singing)
1825
01:26:15,213 --> 01:26:18,346
♫ "Mi Familia" Serrano
Remix playing ♫
1826
01:26:18,390 --> 01:26:20,870
♫ Ay, I'm finna pull up
In that creepy, crawly ♫
1827
01:26:20,914 --> 01:26:22,394
♫ All black Bugatti ♫
1828
01:26:22,437 --> 01:26:24,744
♫ Bag full of money But
it's looking like a body ♫
1829
01:26:24,787 --> 01:26:26,963
♫ Weird but I'm wonderful
Crazy but I'm confident ♫
1830
01:26:27,007 --> 01:26:29,183
♫ I could find a brighter side
To any name they hit me with ♫
1831
01:26:29,227 --> 01:26:31,577
♫ I'm in that all black
I think I'm all that ♫
1832
01:26:31,620 --> 01:26:33,709
♫ I rock designer They don't
know how To pronounce that ♫
1833
01:26:33,753 --> 01:26:35,929
♫ And I don't trip when I
fall 'Cause I bounce back ♫
1834
01:26:35,972 --> 01:26:37,887
♫ And I be rolling with My
clique like a mousepad ♫
1835
01:26:37,931 --> 01:26:39,933
(singing in Spanish)
1836
01:26:47,245 --> 01:26:51,901
♫ We slide we creep
All down your street ♫
1837
01:26:51,945 --> 01:26:56,863
♫ They say we're freaks
I'm sayin' they're with me ♫
1838
01:26:56,906 --> 01:26:58,995
-♫ We so unique ♫ -♫ So unique ♫
1839
01:26:59,039 --> 01:27:01,346
♫ We all black sheep ♫
1840
01:27:01,389 --> 01:27:05,872
♫ We're one big crazy
family Cha cha cha ♫
1841
01:27:05,915 --> 01:27:07,700
(singing in Spanish)
1842
01:27:25,195 --> 01:27:27,763
♫ I only hang with the family
'Cause nobody can handle me ♫
1843
01:27:27,807 --> 01:27:29,112
♫ Try to act like I'm scary ♫
1844
01:27:29,156 --> 01:27:30,810
♫ Because I'm something
They never seen ♫
1845
01:27:30,853 --> 01:27:32,551
♫ My whole room like a
vanity I'm in love with myself ♫
1846
01:27:32,594 --> 01:27:33,552
♫ They know That
they can't touch me ♫
1847
01:27:33,595 --> 01:27:35,597
♫ When I'm
feelin' myself, eh ♫
1848
01:27:35,641 --> 01:27:40,210
♫ We slide we creep
All down your street ♫
1849
01:27:40,254 --> 01:27:42,604
-♫ They say we're
freaks ♫ -♫ Loco ♫
1850
01:27:42,648 --> 01:27:44,954
♫ I'm sayin' they're with me ♫
1851
01:27:44,998 --> 01:27:47,174
-♫ We so unique ♫ -♫ So unique ♫
1852
01:27:47,217 --> 01:27:49,785
♫ We all black sheep ♫
1853
01:27:49,829 --> 01:27:54,573
♫ We're one big crazy
family Cha cha cha ♫
1854
01:27:54,616 --> 01:27:57,924
-♫ Awoo ♫ -♫ Love
that crazy baby ♫
1855
01:27:57,967 --> 01:27:58,751
♫ Shake it ♫
1856
01:28:04,017 --> 01:28:05,932
(singing in Spanish)
1857
01:28:08,630 --> 01:28:11,285
♫ Wherever we are
Yeah, yeah, yeah ♫
1858
01:28:11,329 --> 01:28:13,461
♫ Feels like home
Yeah, yeah, yeah ♫
1859
01:28:13,505 --> 01:28:15,550
-♫ We slide we
creep ♫ -♫ Slide ♫
1860
01:28:15,594 --> 01:28:17,813
♫ All down your street ♫
1861
01:28:17,857 --> 01:28:22,992
♫ We're one big crazy
family Cha cha cha ♫
1862
01:28:23,036 --> 01:28:25,647
♫ I've been around
Yeah, yeah, yeah ♫
1863
01:28:25,691 --> 01:28:27,823
♫ Been up and down
Yeah, yeah, yeah ♫
1864
01:28:27,867 --> 01:28:30,304
♫ So glad I know now
Yeah, yeah, yeah ♫
1865
01:28:30,348 --> 01:28:32,480
♫ I'm not alone now
Yeah, yeah, yeah ♫
1866
01:28:32,524 --> 01:28:35,091
♫ No matter where we roam ♫
1867
01:28:35,135 --> 01:28:37,267
♫ Don't matter 'Cause we know ♫
1868
01:28:37,311 --> 01:28:39,661
♫ Wherever we are
Yeah, yeah, yeah ♫
1869
01:28:39,705 --> 01:28:41,184
♫ Feels like home
Yeah, yeah, yeah ♫
1870
01:28:41,228 --> 01:28:42,185
♫ Eh! ♫
157242
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